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1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:05,000
(pensive music)
(typewriter keys clacking)

2
00:00:20,904 --> 00:00:23,039
(typewriter dings)
(pensive music)

3
00:00:23,039 --> 00:00:28,039
(waves crashing)
(thunder rumbling)

4
00:00:35,822 --> 00:00:38,572
Commander, do you still see it?

5
00:00:40,060 --> 00:00:41,263
Yes, I see it.

6
00:00:42,183 --> 00:00:43,550
It appears to be going down

7
00:00:43,550 --> 00:00:46,313
and it looks like there are survivors.

8
00:00:47,233 --> 00:00:49,243
But there was nothing a moment before.

9
00:00:50,900 --> 00:00:52,183
I can't understand it.

10
00:00:53,524 --> 00:00:54,474
The poor sailors.

11
00:00:55,320 --> 00:00:57,370
Maybe we should fire a torpedo at them!

12
00:00:57,603 --> 00:00:58,853
What, why?

13
00:00:59,530 --> 00:01:00,763
I don't know.

14
00:01:01,270 --> 00:01:02,103
Might be fun.

15
00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:03,503
It would be idiotic.

16
00:01:03,910 --> 00:01:05,403
They are in God's hands now.

17
00:01:05,670 --> 00:01:09,053
Commander, set a course
for the sinking craft.

18
00:01:09,260 --> 00:01:10,491
In this weather?

19
00:01:10,491 --> 00:01:12,773
But we risk going down ourselves.

20
00:01:12,890 --> 00:01:14,100
Let's shoot a torpedo at them.

21
00:01:14,100 --> 00:01:18,023
You will do as you're ordered, Commander,

22
00:01:18,310 --> 00:01:20,983
if you want to stay on
the Fuhrer's good side.

23
00:01:21,250 --> 00:01:22,453
This is my ship.

24
00:01:23,420 --> 00:01:25,020
I am the commander, not you.

25
00:01:25,020 --> 00:01:29,920
We will rescue the survivors,
Commander, at any cost.

26
00:01:30,150 --> 00:01:31,780
But are we taking them prisoner?

27
00:01:31,780 --> 00:01:33,063
Just pull them aboard.

28
00:01:33,063 --> 00:01:35,513
They'll be so happy to be rescued,

29
00:01:35,513 --> 00:01:37,673
they won't ask any questions.

30
00:01:38,591 --> 00:01:41,395
(Braunschweiger sighs)
(pensive music)

31
00:01:41,395 --> 00:01:44,562
Bierficker, three degrees starboard.

32
00:01:47,099 --> 00:01:47,932
Meine?

33
00:01:51,409 --> 00:01:53,242
Meine, pull the clamp.

34
00:01:55,410 --> 00:01:56,313
Yes, Commander?

35
00:01:56,800 --> 00:02:00,003
Full power to the diesel
engines, immediately.

36
00:02:00,910 --> 00:02:02,110
Right away, Commander.

37
00:02:02,906 --> 00:02:04,406
We do not know who they are.

38
00:02:04,423 --> 00:02:06,163
They could be dangerous.

39
00:02:06,366 --> 00:02:07,673
We should be armed.

40
00:02:08,020 --> 00:02:09,523
On the contrary, Lieutenant.

41
00:02:09,540 --> 00:02:11,260
Please set out the fine china

42
00:02:11,260 --> 00:02:13,010
and prepare a tea service for them.

43
00:02:13,022 --> 00:02:16,583
Maybe some of those lemon
cookies from Berlin.

44
00:02:16,950 --> 00:02:19,603
[Gluhwein] This is obvious
sarcasm, Lieutenant.

45
00:02:19,690 --> 00:02:20,563
Disregard those orders.

46
00:02:20,563 --> 00:02:23,693
Valentiner, get the life
vests and prepare the hatch.

47
00:02:23,830 --> 00:02:25,753
Be alert for any sign of danger.

48
00:02:26,140 --> 00:02:28,143
I want them alive, Commander.

49
00:02:28,560 --> 00:02:29,693
Do you understand me?

50
00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:30,833
Alive.

51
00:02:30,980 --> 00:02:31,813
Yes.

52
00:02:31,936 --> 00:02:32,769
Heil Hitler.

53
00:02:32,769 --> 00:02:33,936
Heil Donitz.

54
00:02:34,570 --> 00:02:36,313
It doesn't have the same ring does it?

55
00:02:36,313 --> 00:02:38,940
You are right, heil Hitler was perfect.

56
00:02:38,940 --> 00:02:40,240
So perfect.

57
00:02:40,640 --> 00:02:43,857
But there's no going
back in time, Commander.

58
00:02:43,857 --> 00:02:47,107
No, I suppose we will get used to it.

59
00:02:47,126 --> 00:02:48,293
Heil Donitz.

60
00:02:49,198 --> 00:02:50,059
(Bierficker scoffs)

61
00:02:50,059 --> 00:02:52,726
(pensive music)

62
00:03:22,965 --> 00:03:27,965
(water splashing)
(pensive music)

63
00:03:30,445 --> 00:03:35,445
(rats squeaking)
(pensive music)

64
00:03:36,489 --> 00:03:41,489
(door creaks)
(pensive music)

65
00:03:50,325 --> 00:03:55,325
(water splashing)
(pensive music)

66
00:04:01,394 --> 00:04:06,394
(metal clanging)
(pensive music)

67
00:04:10,970 --> 00:04:13,720
(waves crashing)

68
00:04:15,030 --> 00:04:16,033
[Captain McCloud] Time.

69
00:04:16,937 --> 00:04:18,573
What is it exactly?

70
00:04:20,100 --> 00:04:21,350
What did they always say?

71
00:04:22,007 --> 00:04:25,047
"Half past a monkey's ass,
a quarter 'til his balls?"

72
00:04:25,700 --> 00:04:26,800
But what does it mean?

73
00:04:27,116 --> 00:04:30,734
(gentle music)
(seagulls squawking)

74
00:04:30,950 --> 00:04:32,403
Good afternoon, Sir.

75
00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:35,393
Is it though, Grady?

76
00:04:35,810 --> 00:04:36,643
Sir?

77
00:04:37,450 --> 00:04:39,030
I had a headache last night before bed

78
00:04:39,030 --> 00:04:42,573
and took four Ambien instead
of four aspirin my mistake.

79
00:04:42,580 --> 00:04:43,413
Oh no.

80
00:04:43,620 --> 00:04:44,453
Woke up between the bed

81
00:04:44,453 --> 00:04:47,403
and the nightstand
wearing Day Glow Lipstick.

82
00:04:47,780 --> 00:04:50,533
Well, today's an entirely new day, Sir.

83
00:04:51,140 --> 00:04:52,360
Hearing you might be running low,

84
00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:54,470
I took the liberty of refilling

85
00:04:54,470 --> 00:04:55,800
a little of your special blend.

86
00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:57,590
I gotta quit this stuff someday.

87
00:04:57,590 --> 00:04:59,603
[Grady] Don't be silly, Sir.

88
00:04:59,717 --> 00:05:02,703
Don't all doctors now agree
that smoking is good for you?

89
00:05:03,300 --> 00:05:04,183
Bloodsuckers.

90
00:05:04,380 --> 00:05:05,213
[Grady] Sir?

91
00:05:05,213 --> 00:05:06,653
I've seen 'em, Grady.

92
00:05:07,090 --> 00:05:08,700
Oh, that reminds me, Sir.

93
00:05:08,700 --> 00:05:10,803
Your ex wife's attorney called again.

94
00:05:11,123 --> 00:05:13,393
They only come out at night.

95
00:05:14,460 --> 00:05:17,086
Scarlet lips and long
white teeth glistening

96
00:05:17,086 --> 00:05:18,213
in the moonlight.

97
00:05:18,570 --> 00:05:21,320
Shall I have them speak with
your attorney directly then?

98
00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:23,363
They'll come for me eventually, Grady.

99
00:05:23,899 --> 00:05:27,637
And when they do, I'm done for.

100
00:05:28,446 --> 00:05:31,260
Maybe we should get you
out of this sunlight, Sir.

101
00:05:31,449 --> 00:05:32,282
What?

102
00:05:33,450 --> 00:05:34,283
Oh.

103
00:05:34,580 --> 00:05:36,183
Don't listen to me, Grady.

104
00:05:36,550 --> 00:05:41,343
I'm just an old sailor thinking
back on the good ol' days.

105
00:05:42,340 --> 00:05:43,773
Life at sea is it, Sir?

106
00:05:43,790 --> 00:05:47,623
Out there away from all this.

107
00:05:48,180 --> 00:05:51,073
War is a terrific
enterprise isn't it, Sir?

108
00:05:52,060 --> 00:05:53,043
That it is.

109
00:05:53,160 --> 00:05:55,030
I remember back at
school we used to thrill

110
00:05:55,030 --> 00:05:58,383
to the tales of the great warrior heroes.

111
00:05:58,580 --> 00:06:01,340
Ulysses, Julius Caesar, King--

112
00:06:01,340 --> 00:06:03,954
-You can go now, Grady.
-Very good, Sir.

113
00:06:03,954 --> 00:06:05,624
(seagulls squawking)
(gentle music)

114
00:06:05,624 --> 00:06:07,923
[Captain McCloud] We
were talking about time.

115
00:06:08,210 --> 00:06:11,533
Time enough for the
beach, pineapple drinks,

116
00:06:11,570 --> 00:06:15,220
butlers and apparently
an army of lawyers led

117
00:06:15,220 --> 00:06:19,543
by my ex-wife threatening to
juice me like a Florida orange.

118
00:06:20,460 --> 00:06:23,610
But in my book, if you
haven't been cleaned out

119
00:06:23,610 --> 00:06:27,223
by at least two ex-wives,
you haven't made it yet.

120
00:06:27,915 --> 00:06:30,890
And for all you doubting
Thomas's out there wondering

121
00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:33,960
how in the hell an ex-sailor
can afford his own butler,

122
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:36,763
relax and just fucking enjoy the story.

123
00:06:37,340 --> 00:06:39,990
They tell me it would make
a hell of a movie someday,

124
00:06:40,010 --> 00:06:42,083
but I'm not the Hollywood type.

125
00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:43,973
I'm just a sailor.

126
00:06:44,634 --> 00:06:48,363
So my literary agent will
probably handle the film rights.

127
00:06:48,610 --> 00:06:52,493
Anyway, this is my story.

128
00:06:54,380 --> 00:06:55,770
We were pulled out of the water

129
00:06:55,770 --> 00:06:57,573
and into a strange vessel.

130
00:06:57,950 --> 00:07:00,980
Our own ship was swallowed
up in a midnight squall

131
00:07:00,980 --> 00:07:02,771
off the coast of Puerto Rico on what

132
00:07:02,771 --> 00:07:05,343
was supposed to be a three hour tour.

133
00:07:06,250 --> 00:07:10,253
That storm came outta
nowhere, not forecast at all,

134
00:07:10,820 --> 00:07:12,523
like some sort of cruel joke

135
00:07:12,523 --> 00:07:15,513
the old man in the sky
would make to pass the time.

136
00:07:16,319 --> 00:07:21,123
But then again cruel
joke is my middle name.

137
00:07:22,026 --> 00:07:24,988
Actually, my middle is Stewart but I'm not

138
00:07:24,988 --> 00:07:26,509
here to measure dicks about who's

139
00:07:26,509 --> 00:07:29,103
been in more fucked up situations.

140
00:07:29,290 --> 00:07:31,930
Point is, if you haven't been dumped into

141
00:07:31,930 --> 00:07:34,468
the ocean in a storm at midnight,

142
00:07:34,468 --> 00:07:37,503
you're not missing anything, believe me.

143
00:07:38,100 --> 00:07:39,509
It sucks the big one.

144
00:07:39,509 --> 00:07:42,176
(pensive music)

145
00:07:45,302 --> 00:07:46,290
Where are we?

146
00:07:46,290 --> 00:07:48,093
Well, how the fuck should I know?

147
00:07:48,510 --> 00:07:50,097
Looks like an old ship.

148
00:07:50,097 --> 00:07:52,023
Yeah, well, what else ya got?

149
00:07:52,507 --> 00:07:55,257
(water gurgling)

150
00:07:57,979 --> 00:07:59,325
(dramatic music)

151
00:07:59,360 --> 00:08:01,073
An old German ship?

152
00:08:02,480 --> 00:08:04,613
Yeah, you on a roll.

153
00:08:04,780 --> 00:08:05,613
Hands off.

154
00:08:08,547 --> 00:08:09,653
Oh, good.

155
00:08:09,830 --> 00:08:11,080
For a minute there I was worried

156
00:08:11,080 --> 00:08:13,553
we were rescued by the
wrong sort of people.

157
00:08:15,660 --> 00:08:16,710
This belong to you?

158
00:08:17,740 --> 00:08:18,840
Thanks, Ribbonclerk.

159
00:08:20,070 --> 00:08:21,863
I was aiming for that German kid.

160
00:08:21,950 --> 00:08:23,680
That's why they don't
let women play baseball.

161
00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:25,620
Is that your shitty Irish half

162
00:08:25,620 --> 00:08:27,556
or your shitty Japanese half saying that?

163
00:08:27,556 --> 00:08:29,250
I don't know, what side
do you think it is?

164
00:08:29,250 --> 00:08:30,597
It's obvious, believe me.

165
00:08:30,597 --> 00:08:31,770
[Ribbonclerk] What's the supposed to mean?

166
00:08:31,770 --> 00:08:33,340
-Figure it out, genius.
-Racist.

167
00:08:33,340 --> 00:08:35,070
-Shit for brains.
-Hey, hey, hey!

168
00:08:35,070 --> 00:08:35,903
I hate to break up what y'all

169
00:08:35,903 --> 00:08:38,385
got goin' on right now
but does anybody know

170
00:08:38,385 --> 00:08:40,130
where the hell we are?

171
00:08:40,130 --> 00:08:41,940
What is all this stuff?

172
00:08:41,940 --> 00:08:44,115
There must be at least a dozen passports.

173
00:08:44,115 --> 00:08:46,580
They're all from the 30s and 40s.

174
00:08:46,580 --> 00:08:48,700
Everything is totally vintage.

175
00:08:48,700 --> 00:08:50,553
Strange haul for a pirate ship.

176
00:08:50,553 --> 00:08:52,660
Man, has anybody seen Captain McCloud?

177
00:08:52,660 --> 00:08:55,244
Maybe he was shot trying
to stage a mutiny.

178
00:08:55,244 --> 00:08:56,803
I wouldn't put it past him.

179
00:08:56,810 --> 00:08:58,623
It's just the type of man he was.

180
00:08:58,790 --> 00:09:00,240
He gave knew meaning to the word courage.

181
00:09:00,240 --> 00:09:02,270
He gave new meaning to a lot of words

182
00:09:02,270 --> 00:09:05,290
like captain and pleasure cruise.

183
00:09:05,290 --> 00:09:08,020
And that makes me his
first mate in charge.

184
00:09:08,020 --> 00:09:08,853
Say what?

185
00:09:08,853 --> 00:09:11,930
You're not a first mate, Ribbonclerk,

186
00:09:11,930 --> 00:09:14,330
despite what your snazzy
outfit is telling you

187
00:09:14,330 --> 00:09:17,579
anymore than Roosevelt here
is an entertainment director

188
00:09:17,579 --> 00:09:19,740
and I'm a cruise ship hostess

189
00:09:19,740 --> 00:09:21,310
and whatever Atticus was.

190
00:09:21,310 --> 00:09:22,680
You was in charge of snacks.

191
00:09:22,680 --> 00:09:24,780
There was a little more to it then that.

192
00:09:25,030 --> 00:09:26,483
No, snacks.

193
00:09:26,730 --> 00:09:28,180
-That's all you did.
(hatch creaking)

194
00:09:28,180 --> 00:09:29,683
Captain, you're alive!

195
00:09:30,010 --> 00:09:30,980
[Scarlet] For a terrifying moment

196
00:09:30,980 --> 00:09:32,963
we thought Ribbonclerk was in charge.

197
00:09:33,030 --> 00:09:35,630
We thought maybe you got
killed trying to save us.

198
00:09:36,300 --> 00:09:37,393
Killed trying to save you?

199
00:09:37,393 --> 00:09:39,733
Yeah, like some ex
Marine shit or something.

200
00:09:40,250 --> 00:09:41,293
Ex Marine?

201
00:09:41,310 --> 00:09:42,519
I thought about whacking a few

202
00:09:42,519 --> 00:09:44,283
of 'em when I was out there.

203
00:09:44,650 --> 00:09:47,163
Sure, woulda been a cinch.

204
00:09:47,269 --> 00:09:50,930
I know they wanted me
to, hoping I'd slip up

205
00:09:50,930 --> 00:09:54,053
and they'd get the jump on me
and dip me back in the drink.

206
00:09:54,690 --> 00:09:56,040
But I fooled 'em all right.

207
00:09:56,350 --> 00:09:57,883
Yes, Siree.

208
00:09:57,940 --> 00:09:59,781
I played it nice and safe.

209
00:09:59,781 --> 00:10:01,900
Did everything they said to the letter

210
00:10:01,900 --> 00:10:04,970
so I could make it back here knowing

211
00:10:04,970 --> 00:10:07,103
how worried you all must be.

212
00:10:07,110 --> 00:10:09,103
Captain, you're totally dry.

213
00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:11,353
Huh, how 'bout that?

214
00:10:12,555 --> 00:10:14,650
Just one of those things I guess.

215
00:10:14,650 --> 00:10:15,792
Good old Captain McCloud.

216
00:10:15,792 --> 00:10:17,498
(pensive music)

217
00:10:17,690 --> 00:10:18,690
I got ya, Captain.

218
00:10:19,110 --> 00:10:23,673
Oh, I'm just trying to get
used to the thin air in here,

219
00:10:24,240 --> 00:10:25,283
and the space.

220
00:10:26,360 --> 00:10:28,453
Sure is a small space isn't it?

221
00:10:29,470 --> 00:10:30,573
And mostly metal.

222
00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:32,483
Small, metal and thin air.

223
00:10:33,690 --> 00:10:34,523
The big three.

224
00:10:34,523 --> 00:10:35,440
Are you all right?

225
00:10:35,440 --> 00:10:36,713
You look like shit, man.

226
00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:38,530
Those Germans come back here yet?

227
00:10:38,530 --> 00:10:39,710
They are Germans, then?

228
00:10:39,710 --> 00:10:41,893
Yeah, sure they are.

229
00:10:42,700 --> 00:10:45,760
Didn't anyone get a looksee
at the side of this oil can?

230
00:10:45,760 --> 00:10:50,247
We're all now guests
on the good ol' U-666.

231
00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:53,173
U-666?

232
00:10:53,540 --> 00:10:55,790
It ain't The Good Ship
Lollipop, Roosevelt,

233
00:10:55,795 --> 00:10:57,663
but that's not what worries me.

234
00:10:57,670 --> 00:10:59,380
We are all adults here, Captain.

235
00:10:59,380 --> 00:11:00,620
You can level with us.

236
00:11:00,620 --> 00:11:01,720
True that.

237
00:11:01,720 --> 00:11:05,053
Anybody notice something
strange about this ship?

238
00:11:05,440 --> 00:11:08,090
[Atticus] Are you talking
about the Hitler picture?

239
00:11:08,100 --> 00:11:09,590
Yeah, lots of old ships probably

240
00:11:09,590 --> 00:11:11,490
have pictures of Hitler in 'em, right?

241
00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:14,220
We are in the forward torpedo bay

242
00:11:14,310 --> 00:11:17,543
of a fully operational Kriegsmarine,

243
00:11:17,620 --> 00:11:21,960
World War II era, type seven
class German submarine.

244
00:11:21,960 --> 00:11:22,850
Damn, Captain.

245
00:11:22,850 --> 00:11:23,683
How you know that?

246
00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:26,630
I'm a sailor, Roosevelt,
and I guess you could

247
00:11:26,630 --> 00:11:29,714
say knowing these kinds of
things goes with the territory.

248
00:11:29,714 --> 00:11:31,594
And it's written right by the door.

249
00:11:31,594 --> 00:11:35,271
(pensive music)
(Captain McCloud coughing)

250
00:11:35,271 --> 00:11:38,805
All of you, get in the line!

251
00:11:38,805 --> 00:11:40,722
You're to be inspected!

252
00:11:41,024 --> 00:11:45,167
You will now place your
weapons on the floor, now!

253
00:11:48,941 --> 00:11:51,858
Why were you floating in the ocean?

254
00:11:54,084 --> 00:11:55,667
Where is your ship?

255
00:11:56,670 --> 00:12:00,393
Which one of you is the captain?

256
00:12:02,643 --> 00:12:04,726
And why is there a woman?

257
00:12:08,528 --> 00:12:09,528
A black man?

258
00:12:09,931 --> 00:12:12,598
(pensive music)

259
00:12:17,545 --> 00:12:18,628
What are you?

260
00:12:22,837 --> 00:12:26,903
And a Japanese looking American man?

261
00:12:26,931 --> 00:12:29,772
(Bierficker speaking in foreign language)

262
00:12:29,940 --> 00:12:30,773
And,

263
00:12:34,668 --> 00:12:37,698
(Bierficker sniffing)
(pensive music)

264
00:12:37,698 --> 00:12:38,615
a woodsman?

265
00:12:39,228 --> 00:12:40,383
A woodsman?

266
00:12:40,860 --> 00:12:44,053
Son, I think I can answer
all these questions.

267
00:12:44,310 --> 00:12:47,033
I'm the captain and this is my crew.

268
00:12:47,317 --> 00:12:49,084
(Bierficker laughs)

269
00:12:49,084 --> 00:12:51,293
You are the captain of this ship?

270
00:12:51,900 --> 00:12:53,710
Is this how the Americans dress for war?

271
00:12:53,710 --> 00:12:54,543
War?

272
00:12:55,680 --> 00:13:00,053
So, I guess what they say is true.

273
00:13:00,690 --> 00:13:05,163
The Americans allow
prostitutes on their ships.

274
00:13:05,550 --> 00:13:08,233
Young man, did you just
call me a prostitute?

275
00:13:08,582 --> 00:13:11,432
Maybe as the shoe fits,
(speaking in foreign language).

276
00:13:14,410 --> 00:13:18,923
Just playing along here but like,

277
00:13:19,489 --> 00:13:23,990
a high class prostitute for officers--

278
00:13:23,990 --> 00:13:25,190
High class (chuckles).

279
00:13:25,490 --> 00:13:26,663
Don't make me laugh.

280
00:13:26,663 --> 00:13:27,580
(fist thuds)

281
00:13:27,580 --> 00:13:32,580
(Bierficker thuds)
(gun clattering)

282
00:13:33,510 --> 00:13:34,563
No bullets.

283
00:13:34,890 --> 00:13:36,875
In six months time I will be old enough

284
00:13:36,875 --> 00:13:38,873
to use live ammunition.

285
00:13:39,210 --> 00:13:40,883
I'm only 16!

286
00:13:41,142 --> 00:13:44,563
Well, then in six months
if I see you with a gun,

287
00:13:44,601 --> 00:13:46,493
I'll get nervous.

288
00:13:50,359 --> 00:13:53,610
All right, I'll go straighten this out.

289
00:13:54,270 --> 00:13:56,220
Stay put and for Christ's sakes

290
00:13:56,220 --> 00:13:58,543
don't touch anything near the torpedo bay.

291
00:13:58,549 --> 00:14:00,763
I'll be back as soon as I can.

292
00:14:02,100 --> 00:14:06,483
Okay, hot stuff, let's
go see the head sardine.

293
00:14:08,100 --> 00:14:10,683
(gentle music)

294
00:14:16,933 --> 00:14:18,833
Good news, Master, we'll be arriving

295
00:14:18,930 --> 00:14:20,420
in less than three days.

296
00:14:20,420 --> 00:14:24,300
Yes, three days, then
they will see something.

297
00:14:24,300 --> 00:14:26,803
Then we will have the last laugh.

298
00:14:28,905 --> 00:14:32,473
(Gluhwein laughs)
(pensive music)

299
00:14:32,690 --> 00:14:34,760
Sorry, it just felt right.

300
00:14:35,537 --> 00:14:36,370
Goodnight.

301
00:14:36,926 --> 00:14:41,926
(hatch clangs)
(pensive music)

302
00:14:47,047 --> 00:14:49,803
You know those Lugers are
famous for jamming, right?

303
00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:54,016
(lighter clicks)

304
00:14:54,016 --> 00:14:55,593
Especially when they're loaded.

305
00:14:55,960 --> 00:14:57,235
If you don't say anything about

306
00:14:57,235 --> 00:14:58,787
what happened earlier I can get

307
00:14:58,787 --> 00:15:00,703
you an extra potato for dinner.

308
00:15:02,016 --> 00:15:03,432
You got it, spuds.

309
00:15:03,432 --> 00:15:06,099
(pensive music)

310
00:15:19,780 --> 00:15:21,663
I am the captain of this ship,

311
00:15:22,600 --> 00:15:24,673
Commander Rudolph Braunschweiger.

312
00:15:25,260 --> 00:15:26,660
Pleased to meet you, Rudy.

313
00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:29,523
I'm Captain Gavin McCloud,

314
00:15:30,230 --> 00:15:32,763
but most people call me
Captain Gavin McCloud.

315
00:15:34,353 --> 00:15:37,453
Your cigarette has an
interesting aroma, Captain.

316
00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:40,490
I could say the same
thing about your boat.

317
00:15:40,570 --> 00:15:41,950
If I didn't know any better,

318
00:15:41,950 --> 00:15:45,563
I'd say it was Cannabis Sativa?

319
00:15:45,720 --> 00:15:47,420
And if I didn't know any better,

320
00:15:47,450 --> 00:15:49,413
I'd say your wearing women's cologne.

321
00:15:49,426 --> 00:15:52,093
(pensive music)

322
00:15:55,865 --> 00:15:58,822
(Braunschweiger sighs)

323
00:15:58,890 --> 00:16:00,380
You don't seem very grateful

324
00:16:00,380 --> 00:16:03,313
for having been pulled out
of the ocean half dead.

325
00:16:04,050 --> 00:16:06,893
Sorry if I don't seem grateful, Rudy,

326
00:16:07,066 --> 00:16:08,660
but somehow I'm not myself

327
00:16:08,660 --> 00:16:12,163
with a loaded gun sticking in my ribs.

328
00:16:13,446 --> 00:16:16,343
Bierficker, take your position.

329
00:16:22,230 --> 00:16:24,590
It is a shame that our two great nations

330
00:16:24,590 --> 00:16:26,823
cannot rationally work
out our differences.

331
00:16:27,500 --> 00:16:30,653
After all, we both want
the same things, yes?

332
00:16:34,930 --> 00:16:36,180
And what might that be?

333
00:16:36,590 --> 00:16:38,623
To live in a world without war.

334
00:16:39,031 --> 00:16:42,200
To be free from the clutches
of corrupt politicians

335
00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:45,783
and that our children might
never know suffering and want.

336
00:16:47,120 --> 00:16:49,484
Great slogan, Rudy, but you might

337
00:16:49,484 --> 00:16:52,653
have trouble fitting all that
on the side of your boat.

338
00:16:53,771 --> 00:16:57,453
Violence is our essential
nature, Captain McCloud.

339
00:16:58,570 --> 00:17:01,623
As a fellow Navy man
surely you must agree.

340
00:17:02,410 --> 00:17:06,513
Didn't you guys just
try this 20 years ago?

341
00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:09,523
Maybe this time there is hope.

342
00:17:10,550 --> 00:17:15,490
Sure, hope, the thing with wings.

343
00:17:15,490 --> 00:17:17,982
(pensive music)

344
00:17:17,982 --> 00:17:19,993
What happened to your ship?

345
00:17:19,993 --> 00:17:22,823
Unexpected storm off the
coast of Puerto Rico.

346
00:17:23,730 --> 00:17:26,623
Giant squall seemed to
appear outta nowhere.

347
00:17:27,890 --> 00:17:32,337
The boat capsized and that was it.

348
00:17:33,190 --> 00:17:35,003
We have lost ships here as well.

349
00:17:35,915 --> 00:17:36,748
You don't say.

350
00:17:37,920 --> 00:17:38,753
Since when?

351
00:17:39,130 --> 00:17:40,783
Since the beginning of the war.

352
00:17:40,950 --> 00:17:43,150
Since the very beginning, huh?

353
00:17:43,410 --> 00:17:44,243
Yes.

354
00:17:44,630 --> 00:17:47,883
Well, since you Americans
joined the party,

355
00:17:48,520 --> 00:17:50,293
maybe four years now.

356
00:17:50,790 --> 00:17:52,263
So, that makes it what?

357
00:17:53,063 --> 00:17:56,103
1945?

358
00:17:56,430 --> 00:17:59,493
Did you misplace what year
it was along with your boat?

359
00:18:00,700 --> 00:18:01,533
Okay.

360
00:18:02,830 --> 00:18:04,083
So I'm in shock.

361
00:18:04,870 --> 00:18:08,650
Can't a guy lose his ship,
nearly drown in a raging storm

362
00:18:08,650 --> 00:18:11,163
and be a little confused once in awhile?

363
00:18:11,619 --> 00:18:14,286
(pensive music)

364
00:18:17,080 --> 00:18:18,927
What sort of ship was it?

365
00:18:19,400 --> 00:18:23,623
I assume some kind of
subchaser or PT boat?

366
00:18:24,150 --> 00:18:27,000
I gotta get up pretty early
in the morning to fool you.

367
00:18:27,630 --> 00:18:29,120
-So which was it?
-Which was what?

368
00:18:29,120 --> 00:18:31,157
What sort of ship was it?

369
00:18:31,280 --> 00:18:32,203
I just told you.

370
00:18:32,540 --> 00:18:34,550
Why are you playing
games with me, Captain?

371
00:18:34,550 --> 00:18:38,533
Speaking of games, what's yours?

372
00:18:39,340 --> 00:18:41,490
Why did you bother to
pick us up out there?

373
00:18:41,830 --> 00:18:43,930
I wasn't aware the Germans took prisoners.

374
00:18:44,349 --> 00:18:47,850
What else about our plans
are you aware of, Captain?

375
00:18:47,850 --> 00:18:50,549
Well, I couldn't help but notice

376
00:18:50,549 --> 00:18:55,549
you've got an awfully small
crew for such a big submarine.

377
00:18:56,070 --> 00:18:56,903
Oh?

378
00:18:56,903 --> 00:18:58,320
You don't actually expect me to believe

379
00:18:58,320 --> 00:19:01,377
you're running this tin can
with half a dozen men do you?

380
00:19:01,520 --> 00:19:04,853
For a man in a shock,
little seems to escape you.

381
00:19:05,262 --> 00:19:07,903
And there's something else.

382
00:19:09,280 --> 00:19:12,807
Somebody on this tin
coffin just ripped ass.

383
00:19:12,807 --> 00:19:14,190
(Valentiner sniffing)

384
00:19:14,220 --> 00:19:17,313
Sure, a real nose reaper.

385
00:19:18,920 --> 00:19:19,830
Why didn't you have the God damn decency

386
00:19:19,830 --> 00:19:21,573
to leave the deck first?

387
00:19:22,099 --> 00:19:25,303
I would like a word with you, alone.

388
00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:29,053
It was probably that guy.

389
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,100
You can tell just by the look on his face.

390
00:19:32,920 --> 00:19:35,193
We have dallied here long enough.

391
00:19:35,720 --> 00:19:37,973
Come, there is coffee.

392
00:19:38,430 --> 00:19:39,863
Sure, Rudy, sure.

393
00:19:40,315 --> 00:19:43,480
Only, could you have
The Red Baron there run

394
00:19:43,480 --> 00:19:45,783
some water and some
supplies back to my crew?

395
00:19:46,340 --> 00:19:47,840
If he's not too busy, that is.

396
00:19:48,368 --> 00:19:50,268
-Herr Bierficker?
-Yeah, Commander?

397
00:19:50,670 --> 00:19:52,533
Run some water to his crew.

398
00:19:52,558 --> 00:19:54,808
[Bierficker] Heil Donitz!

399
00:19:55,673 --> 00:19:56,720
Heil Donitz.

400
00:19:56,810 --> 00:19:57,903
Heil donuts?

401
00:19:57,980 --> 00:20:00,680
You are going to pretend
you didn't know the Fuhrer,

402
00:20:00,920 --> 00:20:03,893
Adolf Hitler died last night?

403
00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:05,563
Sure, I knew.

404
00:20:06,430 --> 00:20:07,433
Who didn't?

405
00:20:08,230 --> 00:20:12,803
Yes, well, Donitz is
now Commander in Chief.

406
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:16,263
Come, we have much to discuss.

407
00:20:16,652 --> 00:20:19,319
(pensive music)

408
00:20:28,826 --> 00:20:31,909
(propeller whirring)

409
00:20:32,490 --> 00:20:34,048
-Captain, what's going on?
-So, what happened?

410
00:20:34,048 --> 00:20:36,510
-What did they want?
-Are they really Germans?

411
00:20:36,510 --> 00:20:37,523
[All] Yes!

412
00:20:38,150 --> 00:20:39,163
What's that smell?

413
00:20:40,530 --> 00:20:43,423
That's just a little
crop dusting, sweetheart.

414
00:20:45,230 --> 00:20:48,153
The sheer lasting power of
that one was incredible.

415
00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:49,993
Too complicated to explain.

416
00:20:50,320 --> 00:20:51,470
I think I understand.

417
00:20:51,540 --> 00:20:54,470
I cut one loose, a real nasty one

418
00:20:54,470 --> 00:20:57,703
and then blamed it on them
to see how they'd react.

419
00:20:57,880 --> 00:20:58,880
So, what happened?

420
00:20:59,690 --> 00:21:03,450
Nothing really but sometimes
you gotta improvise, ya know?

421
00:21:03,450 --> 00:21:05,049
To see how far into the woods you can go

422
00:21:05,049 --> 00:21:08,140
before you get lost or
run out of breadcrumbs.

423
00:21:08,140 --> 00:21:09,600
So, Captain, what's the skinny?

424
00:21:09,600 --> 00:21:13,053
I've got some good news
and I've got some bad news.

425
00:21:13,280 --> 00:21:15,480
Well, I think we could all use

426
00:21:15,480 --> 00:21:17,513
a little good news around here, Captain.

427
00:21:17,690 --> 00:21:18,693
Hitler's dead.

428
00:21:19,420 --> 00:21:21,803
Is that the extent of the good news?

429
00:21:22,680 --> 00:21:24,403
The long and the short of it is,

430
00:21:25,277 --> 00:21:27,330
this boat is currently fighting

431
00:21:27,330 --> 00:21:28,810
in the Battle of the Atlantic

432
00:21:28,810 --> 00:21:32,370
for Nazi Germany against
the U.S. and England.

433
00:21:32,370 --> 00:21:35,493
Around May 1945 I believe.

434
00:21:36,290 --> 00:21:37,670
The Commander wants our help

435
00:21:37,670 --> 00:21:40,193
in surrendering this ship
to the United States.

436
00:21:40,370 --> 00:21:42,943
New York City Harbor to be exact.

437
00:21:43,630 --> 00:21:48,200
He figures we can cruise
in, raise the white flag

438
00:21:48,252 --> 00:21:50,823
and make radio contact with America,

439
00:21:51,110 --> 00:21:53,990
with he and his crew as our prisoners.

440
00:21:53,990 --> 00:21:56,310
What was that about 1945?

441
00:21:56,310 --> 00:21:57,883
That was the bad news?

442
00:21:59,260 --> 00:22:01,806
The way I see it, somewhere back off

443
00:22:01,806 --> 00:22:03,683
the coast of Puerto Rico,

444
00:22:03,890 --> 00:22:05,596
either we went back into the past

445
00:22:05,596 --> 00:22:07,593
or they went into the future.

446
00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:11,760
But either way for the moment
we're stuck here on this ship

447
00:22:12,220 --> 00:22:15,293
wherever or whenever that is.

448
00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:16,373
Captain?

449
00:22:19,605 --> 00:22:23,823
Maybe we should take a
little look at our crew.

450
00:22:24,450 --> 00:22:29,143
Take inventory, test the
strength of the chain.

451
00:22:29,840 --> 00:22:33,803
Find weaknesses by any means necessary.

452
00:22:34,310 --> 00:22:38,283
Eliminate the dead weight for
the survival of the group.

453
00:22:40,010 --> 00:22:42,347
I don't think we're quite
at that stage just yet

454
00:22:42,347 --> 00:22:46,193
but thank you, Scarlet, I think.

455
00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:53,200
Look, everybody, I know this
isn't the cruise you expected.

456
00:22:53,902 --> 00:22:55,883
But I want you all to know one thing.

457
00:22:56,580 --> 00:22:58,623
When I deputized you for this trip,

458
00:22:58,850 --> 00:23:02,000
I made each and every one of you sort of

459
00:23:02,000 --> 00:23:04,773
an officer in kind of a Navy,

460
00:23:05,330 --> 00:23:09,293
and I meant every word
I said or meant to say.

461
00:23:09,830 --> 00:23:13,030
Why, when we set sail
from Miami to Puerto Rico

462
00:23:13,030 --> 00:23:16,123
I could inhale with ease
knowing you all had a job to do.

463
00:23:16,910 --> 00:23:19,600
Whether it was running the ship when

464
00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:21,303
I was indisposed or asleep,

465
00:23:21,460 --> 00:23:24,943
maintaining the highest standard
of music and entertainment,

466
00:23:25,120 --> 00:23:28,613
or even snacks.

467
00:23:28,860 --> 00:23:30,690
I did more than snacks.

468
00:23:30,690 --> 00:23:32,930
I don't suppose anybody's
cellphone made it?

469
00:23:32,930 --> 00:23:34,663
Oh, shit, I forgot.

470
00:23:35,280 --> 00:23:36,920
-Oh, thank God!
-I'm not getting

471
00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:38,283
any service, though.

472
00:23:39,020 --> 00:23:40,373
It says no bars.

473
00:23:40,930 --> 00:23:41,763
Who's your carrier?

474
00:23:41,763 --> 00:23:43,933
Try and see if you can get
any reception on that thing,

475
00:23:43,933 --> 00:23:46,768
but for Christ sake's, keep it hidden.

476
00:23:46,768 --> 00:23:49,973
Germans have a real
hard-on for technology.

477
00:23:50,010 --> 00:23:52,220
So, wait, they think
they're in the present,

478
00:23:52,220 --> 00:23:54,603
but for us it's really the past?

479
00:23:54,870 --> 00:23:57,453
Or we think we're in the past,

480
00:23:57,892 --> 00:24:00,843
but it's really the
present which is the past?

481
00:24:01,710 --> 00:24:03,223
The Bermuda Triangle.

482
00:24:03,390 --> 00:24:04,223
The what?

483
00:24:04,400 --> 00:24:05,784
The Bermuda Triangle.

484
00:24:05,784 --> 00:24:08,093
That's where we were when our ship sank.

485
00:24:08,310 --> 00:24:09,460
That's gotta be it.

486
00:24:09,460 --> 00:24:12,210
Oh, right, right after we
saw the Loch Ness Monster.

487
00:24:12,210 --> 00:24:13,260
This some bullshit.

488
00:24:14,060 --> 00:24:15,833
I paid for a Caribbean cruise.

489
00:24:16,120 --> 00:24:19,123
Bermuda Triangle, Hitler, time travel?

490
00:24:19,360 --> 00:24:20,820
This happen on all your cruises?

491
00:24:20,820 --> 00:24:22,590
Captain, isn't there some sort

492
00:24:22,590 --> 00:24:26,913
of scientific way to discover
where or when we are?

493
00:24:27,940 --> 00:24:29,840
On the command deck there's a radio,

494
00:24:30,510 --> 00:24:31,697
but my guess is they aren't using

495
00:24:31,697 --> 00:24:33,943
it much to avoid radar detection.

496
00:24:34,170 --> 00:24:38,670
In second life, I have a fully
operational Model S Tesla,

497
00:24:38,670 --> 00:24:40,743
which I 3D modeled myself.

498
00:24:40,920 --> 00:24:42,170
Here's the thing, though.

499
00:24:42,430 --> 00:24:44,620
It's not only gasoline powered instead

500
00:24:44,620 --> 00:24:46,900
of the lame-o stock electric power,

501
00:24:46,900 --> 00:24:51,313
but it's a vehicle that
is itself a time machine,

502
00:24:51,450 --> 00:24:53,170
thanks to a new energy storage device

503
00:24:53,170 --> 00:24:55,923
that harnesses the power
of real lightening.

504
00:24:56,350 --> 00:24:58,210
I just thought I'd throw that out there.

505
00:24:58,210 --> 00:24:59,133
Sounds familiar.

506
00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:00,640
[Ribbonclerk] If we're in the past then

507
00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:02,292
how do we get back to the present?

508
00:25:02,292 --> 00:25:04,007
I don't know.

509
00:25:04,007 --> 00:25:05,876
If we're in the present
and they're in the future,

510
00:25:05,876 --> 00:25:07,411
how do we return them to the past?

511
00:25:07,411 --> 00:25:08,244
I don't know.

512
00:25:08,244 --> 00:25:10,137
-If I die--
-Would you please shut up?

513
00:25:10,137 --> 00:25:12,060
If you're all looking for a lot

514
00:25:12,060 --> 00:25:16,095
of phony assurances that
everything's gonna be okay,

515
00:25:16,095 --> 00:25:18,186
that I've got all the answers

516
00:25:18,186 --> 00:25:21,993
and that Santa Claus and
the Easter Bunny are real,

517
00:25:22,630 --> 00:25:24,530
then yeah, everything's gonna be fine.

518
00:25:24,750 --> 00:25:27,020
You thinkin' way too
hard about this, Captain.

519
00:25:27,020 --> 00:25:28,936
Time travel, that's just as real

520
00:25:28,936 --> 00:25:31,773
as Snacks here's second life Tesla.

521
00:25:32,180 --> 00:25:33,982
Exactly and I don't think I feel

522
00:25:33,982 --> 00:25:38,483
like helping out a buncha
Nazis, even if it is 1945.

523
00:25:38,880 --> 00:25:40,730
So they just need our help surrendering

524
00:25:40,730 --> 00:25:42,233
the ship in New York Harbor?

525
00:25:42,830 --> 00:25:43,663
That's all?

526
00:25:43,700 --> 00:25:44,580
That's what they said.

527
00:25:44,580 --> 00:25:46,400
But how do we know they're not setting

528
00:25:46,400 --> 00:25:48,490
us up for some kinda double cross.

529
00:25:48,490 --> 00:25:49,739
We don't have a choice.

530
00:25:49,739 --> 00:25:52,870
It's join up with these
nutty cherries or us.

531
00:25:52,870 --> 00:25:54,823
Captain, there's something else.

532
00:25:55,130 --> 00:25:57,037
While you were out, I found this.

533
00:25:57,037 --> 00:25:58,333
(dramatic music)

534
00:25:58,430 --> 00:25:59,333
It's locked.

535
00:25:59,520 --> 00:26:00,353
What is it?

536
00:26:00,470 --> 00:26:02,070
Anybody here speak Squarehead?

537
00:26:02,130 --> 00:26:02,963
Squarehead?

538
00:26:02,963 --> 00:26:04,880
It's a derisive term for Germans

539
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:07,780
you hear in old films when
they're portrayed as the enemy.

540
00:26:07,880 --> 00:26:09,380
I'm tryin' to get in the mood.

541
00:26:10,740 --> 00:26:12,990
Well, that first word
is obviously vampire.

542
00:26:13,780 --> 00:26:15,373
And the last word is kit.

543
00:26:15,570 --> 00:26:19,743
What would these kooky Jerry's
have a vampire kit for?

544
00:26:20,550 --> 00:26:21,923
It must be some kinda joke.

545
00:26:22,030 --> 00:26:23,423
What sort of joke?

546
00:26:23,442 --> 00:26:26,253
I don't know, Krauts have
a strange sense of humor.

547
00:26:26,410 --> 00:26:27,493
Put that thing away.

548
00:26:27,700 --> 00:26:29,450
Captain, what are we going to do?

549
00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:32,370
We've gotta tell these
filthy Huns something

550
00:26:32,370 --> 00:26:34,870
they'll believe until we
find out what's going on.

551
00:26:35,198 --> 00:26:37,310
Right now they think we're military

552
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:40,433
and that may be our only
chance of getting outta here,

553
00:26:40,625 --> 00:26:43,903
and that's if and it's a big if,

554
00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:46,940
we somehow make it back
without getting deep-sixed

555
00:26:46,940 --> 00:26:48,373
by the real U.S. Navy.

556
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:50,303
In what era, though?

557
00:26:50,460 --> 00:26:51,293
Precisely.

558
00:26:51,340 --> 00:26:53,173
Guys, I'm starting to freak out.

559
00:26:53,250 --> 00:26:55,859
I really feel like I might
be the expendable one here.

560
00:26:55,859 --> 00:26:58,510
The play is to get together a cover story

561
00:26:58,510 --> 00:27:01,373
for each of us and what
kinda ship we were on.

562
00:27:02,470 --> 00:27:04,003
Until we find out the truth,

563
00:27:04,003 --> 00:27:06,973
ol' Fritzy is gonna
think we're on his time.

564
00:27:08,009 --> 00:27:10,053
Stick with your military cover.

565
00:27:10,550 --> 00:27:12,093
The job's ya had on my ship.

566
00:27:12,320 --> 00:27:14,140
I don't wanna be Snacks.

567
00:27:14,140 --> 00:27:15,830
You want these creepy Heinies to throw

568
00:27:15,830 --> 00:27:17,083
you back out in the sea?

569
00:27:17,480 --> 00:27:20,473
Follow my lead and keep your head down.

570
00:27:21,490 --> 00:27:23,635
And no more talk about
the Bermuda Triangle,

571
00:27:23,635 --> 00:27:27,550
time travel, vampires or second life,

572
00:27:27,550 --> 00:27:28,850
whatever the fuck that is.

573
00:27:28,980 --> 00:27:31,923
Snacks, keep that phone
of yours outta sight.

574
00:27:32,470 --> 00:27:34,963
It may be our only way out of this mess.

575
00:27:34,963 --> 00:27:37,630
(pensive music)

576
00:28:03,565 --> 00:28:08,565
(Captain McCloud snoring)
(pensive music)

577
00:28:26,919 --> 00:28:31,919
(engine chugging)
(pensive music)

578
00:28:48,663 --> 00:28:53,663
(bat squeaking)
(pensive music)

579
00:28:53,669 --> 00:28:58,669
(engine chugging)
(pensive music)

580
00:29:44,439 --> 00:29:47,189
(dramatic music)

581
00:29:52,530 --> 00:29:54,262
(vampire laughs)

582
00:29:54,262 --> 00:29:57,012
(big band music)

583
00:30:12,434 --> 00:30:17,434
(Gluhwein yells)
(big band music)

584
00:30:21,728 --> 00:30:24,478
(waves crashing)

585
00:30:28,870 --> 00:30:30,803
Long and the short of it is,

586
00:30:32,260 --> 00:30:35,163
we have a new tradition
in the ol' U.S. Navy.

587
00:30:35,740 --> 00:30:37,803
Casual Fridays we call it.

588
00:30:38,600 --> 00:30:40,208
That's why we're all dressed like this.

589
00:30:40,208 --> 00:30:42,773
Kinda like Halloween, you might say.

590
00:30:43,350 --> 00:30:45,783
I'm dressed as a tourist,

591
00:30:46,220 --> 00:30:50,023
Roosevelt over here is a car thief,

592
00:30:50,610 --> 00:30:52,603
Scarlet is of course a prostitute,

593
00:30:53,074 --> 00:30:57,010
Ribbonclerk has on an
excellent cruise boat costume

594
00:30:57,460 --> 00:31:01,983
and Atticus as the young man
discovered is a lumberjack.

595
00:31:02,651 --> 00:31:05,647
We must look quite the
screwy bunch (chuckles).

596
00:31:07,780 --> 00:31:12,573
Atticus, kindly hand me the
telephone you are concealing.

597
00:31:12,606 --> 00:31:15,273
(pensive music)

598
00:31:16,599 --> 00:31:19,410
If you are hiding the telephone somewhere

599
00:31:19,410 --> 00:31:21,350
on your person, woodsman,

600
00:31:21,350 --> 00:31:24,940
we will search and find it, I assure you.

601
00:31:25,170 --> 00:31:27,843
That's it, that's the whole phone.

602
00:31:30,070 --> 00:31:31,270
Lieutenant Valentiner?

603
00:31:31,956 --> 00:31:33,977
Yeah, Lord Commander?

604
00:31:34,163 --> 00:31:37,593
Take this spy camera to the engine room,

605
00:31:38,254 --> 00:31:40,704
and have Meine tear it
apart and remove the film.

606
00:31:43,250 --> 00:31:44,083
Commander?

607
00:31:44,520 --> 00:31:45,963
Yes, Captain McCloud?

608
00:31:46,164 --> 00:31:48,364
Do you have something
else to share with us?

609
00:31:48,670 --> 00:31:50,660
For instance, have you been on

610
00:31:50,660 --> 00:31:53,723
a pleasure cruise in the
Bermuda Triangle lately?

611
00:31:54,850 --> 00:31:57,723
You haven't traveled through
time recently have you?

612
00:31:58,690 --> 00:32:00,597
What lies do you have to tell me now?

613
00:32:01,073 --> 00:32:01,906
Lies?

614
00:32:02,003 --> 00:32:05,553
There's no such thing in the
military as casual Fridays.

615
00:32:06,130 --> 00:32:09,383
Besides, it is Wednesday.

616
00:32:09,460 --> 00:32:12,000
I know that you must have
known that we were listening

617
00:32:12,000 --> 00:32:14,063
to your every word through the intercom.

618
00:32:16,030 --> 00:32:18,400
-Of course I knew.
-And so I believe

619
00:32:18,400 --> 00:32:19,933
I know who you really are.

620
00:32:20,050 --> 00:32:21,603
Okay, Rudy, let's hear it.

621
00:32:22,060 --> 00:32:22,893
Who are we?

622
00:32:23,190 --> 00:32:26,373
Your ship was indeed a military vessel,

623
00:32:27,170 --> 00:32:29,260
disguised perhaps as a pleasure boat.

624
00:32:29,260 --> 00:32:31,163
I have seen such things before.

625
00:32:31,970 --> 00:32:34,650
You are all expert military personnel

626
00:32:34,650 --> 00:32:37,880
who are each no doubt in position

627
00:32:37,880 --> 00:32:39,990
of powerful hidden talents underneath

628
00:32:39,990 --> 00:32:42,193
your ridiculous facades.

629
00:32:43,700 --> 00:32:45,230
Each of you must have been chosen

630
00:32:45,230 --> 00:32:48,090
for your intelligence and skill

631
00:32:48,666 --> 00:32:51,983
and your dedication to the armed services.

632
00:32:52,777 --> 00:32:54,163
-Impressive.
-Hm?

633
00:32:54,280 --> 00:32:55,860
Yeah, dead nuts.

634
00:32:55,860 --> 00:32:56,996
At last, the pressure of holding

635
00:32:56,996 --> 00:32:59,910
this inside has been excruciating.

636
00:32:59,910 --> 00:33:00,743
I have a question.

637
00:33:00,743 --> 00:33:03,403
Why do you have a picture
of Hitler back there?

638
00:33:03,403 --> 00:33:05,840
Admiral Donitz is now the head

639
00:33:05,840 --> 00:33:06,844
of the Reich but that picture

640
00:33:06,844 --> 00:33:09,883
is there for sentimental reasons.

641
00:33:10,270 --> 00:33:12,860
You are all now prisoners on my ship

642
00:33:12,860 --> 00:33:15,163
and there will be no escape.

643
00:33:16,830 --> 00:33:17,663
And let me tell you

644
00:33:17,663 --> 00:33:20,920
a little something else
(speaking in foreign language),

645
00:33:21,040 --> 00:33:24,592
-my gun is loaded.
(gun cocks)

646
00:33:24,592 --> 00:33:26,113
That sounds amazing.

647
00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:35,830
So what do they call you?

648
00:33:37,710 --> 00:33:38,713
Jesse Owens.

649
00:33:38,775 --> 00:33:39,608
Hm.

650
00:33:39,701 --> 00:33:41,770
You won't be able to run away

651
00:33:41,770 --> 00:33:43,863
from this predicament, Mr. Owens.

652
00:33:45,620 --> 00:33:47,943
Because he's an Olympic runner,

653
00:33:48,850 --> 00:33:50,860
and that ability won't
help him on a submarine.

654
00:33:50,860 --> 00:33:52,560
Come on, I'm killing it right now.

655
00:33:54,100 --> 00:33:56,533
Where are you from, Mr. Owens?

656
00:33:56,630 --> 00:33:57,463
-Texas.
-Hm.

657
00:33:57,463 --> 00:33:59,943
Are there many of you in Texas?

658
00:34:00,600 --> 00:34:01,650
What, black people?

659
00:34:02,030 --> 00:34:04,173
No, Navy men.

660
00:34:04,790 --> 00:34:07,283
Why are you Americans
so obsessed with race?

661
00:34:10,090 --> 00:34:11,143
What is your name?

662
00:34:11,420 --> 00:34:13,403
Kai Ribbonclerk, First Mate.

663
00:34:13,460 --> 00:34:14,973
Are you feeling unwell?

664
00:34:15,090 --> 00:34:16,363
I've never felt better.

665
00:34:17,500 --> 00:34:19,513
You are a long way from home.

666
00:34:20,400 --> 00:34:22,593
A long way from Mount Fuji.

667
00:34:23,970 --> 00:34:25,763
I'm from San Francisco.

668
00:34:26,070 --> 00:34:28,080
Oh, is that what you told them?

669
00:34:28,080 --> 00:34:29,380
You can tell me, you know?

670
00:34:30,140 --> 00:34:30,973
Tell them.

671
00:34:31,185 --> 00:34:33,303
Tell them your work for Hirohito.

672
00:34:33,720 --> 00:34:35,263
I work at Google.

673
00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:40,270
I thought we were supposed to be friends.

674
00:34:41,440 --> 00:34:44,340
As your captain has no doubt informed you,

675
00:34:44,340 --> 00:34:48,063
we are taking this ship
to the New York Harbor,

676
00:34:48,500 --> 00:34:52,673
and there we will surrender it
to the American authorities.

677
00:34:53,350 --> 00:34:58,350
You as Americans will be
bringing in quite a prize.

678
00:34:58,460 --> 00:35:01,300
Ever occur to you,
Commander, that we may not

679
00:35:01,300 --> 00:35:03,236
be interested in helping you?

680
00:35:03,236 --> 00:35:04,069
Hm.

681
00:35:05,157 --> 00:35:06,640
You are free to go back to where

682
00:35:06,640 --> 00:35:09,823
you came from anytime you wish.

683
00:35:10,420 --> 00:35:11,830
Shall I have the hatch opened?

684
00:35:11,830 --> 00:35:13,140
That won't be necessary.

685
00:35:13,140 --> 00:35:15,983
Aren't you going a little
out of your way to surrender?

686
00:35:18,370 --> 00:35:20,540
I'll not place my men in the hands

687
00:35:20,540 --> 00:35:22,533
of the English if that's what you mean.

688
00:35:22,781 --> 00:35:25,190
Is it because you bombed
their country flat

689
00:35:25,190 --> 00:35:26,540
and now they're mad at you?

690
00:35:26,570 --> 00:35:28,440
(Braunschweiger chuckles)

691
00:35:28,520 --> 00:35:29,483
I like this man.

692
00:35:29,680 --> 00:35:31,033
He says what he thinks.

693
00:35:32,580 --> 00:35:34,933
Oh, come on everybody, don't look so glum.

694
00:35:35,430 --> 00:35:37,653
In three days we will be in New York.

695
00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:39,380
After we surrender the ship you

696
00:35:39,380 --> 00:35:40,930
will be given a hero's welcome,

697
00:35:41,010 --> 00:35:43,040
you will be tripping the light fantastic

698
00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:44,933
on top of the Empire State Building,

699
00:35:45,300 --> 00:35:48,453
and remembering this time
with a chuckle in your heart.

700
00:35:49,259 --> 00:35:51,591
I feel really, really
good about this, guys.

701
00:35:51,591 --> 00:35:54,258
(pensive music)

702
00:35:57,125 --> 00:35:58,510
[Captain McCloud] The Commander marched

703
00:35:58,510 --> 00:36:01,553
my crew around the ship for
what seemed like an eternity.

704
00:36:01,970 --> 00:36:03,740
He assigned each of us to a German

705
00:36:03,800 --> 00:36:06,203
so they'd learn the
operations of the ship.

706
00:36:06,220 --> 00:36:07,853
My crew had about as much knowledge

707
00:36:07,853 --> 00:36:09,488
about how a ship works as I did

708
00:36:09,488 --> 00:36:12,143
of the complete works of
Rodgers and Hammerstein.

709
00:36:13,000 --> 00:36:15,480
Actually, I'm pretty up on that stuff.

710
00:36:15,480 --> 00:36:19,023
I dated a stage manager for way too long.

711
00:36:19,090 --> 00:36:21,683
So, let's make it the
price of tea in china.

712
00:36:22,470 --> 00:36:23,713
But wait, fuck.

713
00:36:24,060 --> 00:36:25,190
I actually do know that.

714
00:36:25,190 --> 00:36:27,233
It's 341 Yuan.

715
00:36:27,930 --> 00:36:32,563
It's sad, really, how all
this brings me back home,

716
00:36:33,130 --> 00:36:38,093
to the way things were
before all this war business.

717
00:36:38,258 --> 00:36:40,347
(Captain McCloud gasping)
(gentle music)

718
00:36:40,347 --> 00:36:42,473
Gavin, what are you doing?

719
00:36:42,710 --> 00:36:43,543
I'm fine.

720
00:36:44,590 --> 00:36:49,590
It's just, why aren't there
any windows in this restaurant?

721
00:36:50,900 --> 00:36:54,483
Gavin, are you gonna ask me to marry you?

722
00:36:54,520 --> 00:36:55,353
What?

723
00:36:55,353 --> 00:36:56,186
No!

724
00:36:56,186 --> 00:36:57,019
Maybe, why?

725
00:36:57,019 --> 00:36:58,343
A girl can just tell.

726
00:36:58,860 --> 00:36:59,693
Tell what?

727
00:37:00,410 --> 00:37:01,727
I can't believe they're allowed to build

728
00:37:01,727 --> 00:37:04,290
a restaurant without any windows.

729
00:37:04,290 --> 00:37:07,773
I mean, just take a
look around you, Ellen.

730
00:37:08,237 --> 00:37:10,750
There's not one window
in this whole place.

731
00:37:10,750 --> 00:37:12,467
And hello (speaking in foreign language).

732
00:37:13,030 --> 00:37:15,060
My name is Andre and I am
your waiter for tonight.

733
00:37:15,060 --> 00:37:16,740
That is some storm we
are having out there, no?

734
00:37:16,740 --> 00:37:18,674
[Captain McCloud] There was
no storm in the forecast.

735
00:37:18,674 --> 00:37:20,462
(speaking in foreign language)
I think you are mistaken.

736
00:37:20,462 --> 00:37:22,110
There's definitely a storm out tonight.

737
00:37:22,110 --> 00:37:22,943
-Listen.
(thunder rumbling)

738
00:37:22,943 --> 00:37:24,970
You don't think I know
when there's a storm?

739
00:37:24,970 --> 00:37:27,453
I think he just really
needs some water is all.

740
00:37:27,570 --> 00:37:29,000
Oh, forgive me, I am so sorry.

741
00:37:29,000 --> 00:37:30,750
I'll get you some water right away.

742
00:37:31,060 --> 00:37:33,327
Pour some nice water for
(speaking in foreign language).

743
00:37:35,606 --> 00:37:36,529
(Andre sniffs)

744
00:37:36,529 --> 00:37:38,460
-Oh!
(water splashing)

745
00:37:38,460 --> 00:37:39,293
Oh, I'm sorry!

746
00:37:39,293 --> 00:37:41,218
-I won't be long, Sir.
(Gavin coughs)

747
00:37:41,218 --> 00:37:43,444
-I am so sorry, I am so--
(Gavin coughs)

748
00:37:43,444 --> 00:37:44,439
Okay, I'll help you.

749
00:37:44,439 --> 00:37:45,389
Let me wipe it off.

750
00:37:45,610 --> 00:37:47,120
I'll take it off right
there, I am so sorry.

751
00:37:47,120 --> 00:37:48,093
It'll come out.

752
00:37:48,096 --> 00:37:50,333
Let me get you two the specials.

753
00:37:50,680 --> 00:37:53,593
Tonight we have a very
special treat for you.

754
00:37:53,840 --> 00:37:56,220
It's called the Mariner's chicken.

755
00:37:56,220 --> 00:37:57,330
It's a specialty of the chef

756
00:37:57,330 --> 00:37:59,488
and how they make this is fascinating.

757
00:37:59,488 --> 00:38:02,470
They take the chicken and they boil

758
00:38:02,470 --> 00:38:04,566
it in oil and they bury it deep

759
00:38:04,566 --> 00:38:08,703
and they stuff it into
a small cast iron pan.

760
00:38:08,850 --> 00:38:10,794
It's a small pan and they take the chicken

761
00:38:10,794 --> 00:38:11,796
-and they cram
-No.

762
00:38:11,796 --> 00:38:13,010
the chicken in the pan.

763
00:38:13,010 --> 00:38:16,027
They stick it in and the
chicken has no hope of escape

764
00:38:16,027 --> 00:38:18,070
and the meat falls off the bone.

765
00:38:18,070 --> 00:38:20,940
They cram it, stuff it
inside the cast iron pan--

766
00:38:20,940 --> 00:38:22,346
Oh my God!

767
00:38:22,346 --> 00:38:25,517
(Gavin gasping)
(jazz music)

768
00:38:25,517 --> 00:38:27,343
I've gotta get the hell outta here!

769
00:38:27,360 --> 00:38:29,777
(jazz music)

770
00:38:32,797 --> 00:38:34,250
I studied at the academy

771
00:38:34,250 --> 00:38:36,313
for three weeks before this mission.

772
00:38:36,320 --> 00:38:37,741
Oh wow, three weeks?

773
00:38:37,741 --> 00:38:40,303
Did your parents have to
sign a permission slip?

774
00:38:41,080 --> 00:38:42,193
My parents are dead.

775
00:38:42,440 --> 00:38:43,373
Oh, air raid?

776
00:38:43,810 --> 00:38:44,643
Yeah.

777
00:38:44,670 --> 00:38:45,877
But they were trying to take
over the world you know?

778
00:38:45,877 --> 00:38:47,730
[Bierficker] You're meant to be helping!

779
00:38:47,730 --> 00:38:49,730
-What's this knob do?
-Don't touch that!

780
00:38:49,730 --> 00:38:50,830
That's a Tiefenmesser.

781
00:38:51,360 --> 00:38:52,360
It's very important.

782
00:38:52,800 --> 00:38:53,633
Fuel gage?

783
00:38:53,943 --> 00:38:56,933
(laughs) No, you're so dumb.

784
00:38:57,430 --> 00:38:59,373
That's a depth gauge.

785
00:39:00,450 --> 00:39:01,283
Damn.

786
00:39:01,410 --> 00:39:03,453
Have you ever seen a radio before?

787
00:39:04,340 --> 00:39:05,173
What?

788
00:39:05,173 --> 00:39:06,028
It's not too difficult, yeah.

789
00:39:06,028 --> 00:39:08,450
You're going to put on the headphones.

790
00:39:08,450 --> 00:39:09,350
Here, try them on.

791
00:39:11,520 --> 00:39:13,510
You will monitor the frequencies written

792
00:39:13,510 --> 00:39:15,003
down in the log book.

793
00:39:15,640 --> 00:39:16,940
What am I listenin' for?

794
00:39:18,040 --> 00:39:19,480
To see if the Brooklyn Dodgers

795
00:39:19,480 --> 00:39:21,130
are winning the game of baseball.

796
00:39:23,790 --> 00:39:25,340
What you know about baseball?

797
00:39:26,505 --> 00:39:30,240
Before the war you know,
I was in American once.

798
00:39:30,240 --> 00:39:31,157
As a spy?

799
00:39:31,606 --> 00:39:34,578
(speaking in foreign
language), I was very small.

800
00:39:34,578 --> 00:39:37,253
We do not have baby spies.

801
00:39:38,020 --> 00:39:38,853
Not anymore.

802
00:39:38,853 --> 00:39:40,280
Well, listen, I got a question.

803
00:39:40,280 --> 00:39:41,323
Yeah, yeah.

804
00:39:41,640 --> 00:39:43,530
Y'all on this ship like y'all are part

805
00:39:43,530 --> 00:39:46,290
of some kind of historical reenactment

806
00:39:46,290 --> 00:39:47,335
or some shit like that?

807
00:39:47,335 --> 00:39:48,517
No, this is sort of correct.

808
00:39:48,517 --> 00:39:50,360
We are all part of history.

809
00:39:50,360 --> 00:39:52,273
We are part of the new German history.

810
00:39:53,000 --> 00:39:55,060
For a thousand years we could've ruled

811
00:39:55,060 --> 00:39:58,807
and restored cosmic order
to the world fulfilling

812
00:39:58,807 --> 00:40:01,083
the legacy of Siegfried who sits alone

813
00:40:01,083 --> 00:40:03,753
in his mountain palace in Valhalla.

814
00:40:04,820 --> 00:40:08,633
Well, listen, when we get to
New York, stick to baseball.

815
00:40:11,277 --> 00:40:12,713
Sticking to baseball.

816
00:40:14,871 --> 00:40:15,837
(lever clicks)

817
00:40:15,837 --> 00:40:18,837
(floorboard creaks)

818
00:40:19,410 --> 00:40:22,227
So, (speaking in foreign language)

819
00:40:22,227 --> 00:40:24,513
what do you think of our ship?

820
00:40:25,000 --> 00:40:28,094
Oh, I've always had a
thing for submarines.

821
00:40:28,094 --> 00:40:28,927
Really?

822
00:40:29,754 --> 00:40:32,850
So, the plan is surrendering
to the Americans is it?

823
00:40:32,850 --> 00:40:36,173
What did you think to
yourself when the Fuhrer died?

824
00:40:36,430 --> 00:40:37,263
Hitler?

825
00:40:38,058 --> 00:40:40,363
I was surprised.

826
00:40:40,540 --> 00:40:44,960
First he was alive and then
he was dead and that's bad.

827
00:40:44,960 --> 00:40:47,586
Sometimes, what's good for the goose

828
00:40:47,586 --> 00:40:49,530
is good for the gander.

829
00:40:49,530 --> 00:40:51,880
Oh, I'm always saying that.

830
00:40:51,880 --> 00:40:56,823
Sometimes good things come
in unexpected packages.

831
00:40:56,889 --> 00:40:58,873
Aren't you gonna have any coffee?

832
00:40:59,160 --> 00:40:59,993
No!

833
00:41:00,300 --> 00:41:02,423
The caffeine makes me jumpy.

834
00:41:02,830 --> 00:41:03,663
Please drink.

835
00:41:03,663 --> 00:41:06,122
(eerie music)

836
00:41:18,969 --> 00:41:21,969
(teacup clattering)

837
00:41:25,770 --> 00:41:26,999
(Scarlet slurping)

838
00:41:26,999 --> 00:41:28,832
Mm, is that instant?

839
00:41:29,210 --> 00:41:30,480
Listen, if you have anything

840
00:41:30,480 --> 00:41:32,170
you'd like me to take care of back here,

841
00:41:32,170 --> 00:41:34,770
-I'd be happy to help.
-What do you know how to do?

842
00:41:35,370 --> 00:41:37,594
Are you familiar with second life?

843
00:41:37,594 --> 00:41:40,663
Didn't they teach you
anything in the Navy?

844
00:41:42,000 --> 00:41:44,060
Well, you know how it is Klaus.

845
00:41:44,060 --> 00:41:47,183
Sometimes you get the
feeling that in the military,

846
00:41:47,220 --> 00:41:48,710
they don't look at the whole person.

847
00:41:48,710 --> 00:41:50,693
How long have you been a sailor?

848
00:41:50,938 --> 00:41:54,373
Honestly, I'm gonna
have to say all my life.

849
00:41:54,690 --> 00:41:55,770
I don't believe you.

850
00:41:55,770 --> 00:41:58,333
I don't think you know
anything about anything.

851
00:41:58,479 --> 00:42:01,410
Well, in all fairness,
Klaus, I didn't submit

852
00:42:01,410 --> 00:42:03,260
an application to get on this boat.

853
00:42:03,260 --> 00:42:04,687
No, you didn't.

854
00:42:05,070 --> 00:42:06,900
You were just floating in the middle

855
00:42:06,900 --> 00:42:09,663
of the ocean and we happened to pass by.

856
00:42:09,940 --> 00:42:12,077
I know, it's crazy, right?

857
00:42:12,077 --> 00:42:13,973
I'm going to be watching you.

858
00:42:14,170 --> 00:42:16,413
That's probably a good idea.

859
00:42:17,272 --> 00:42:20,008
(pensive music)
(engine chugging)

860
00:42:20,008 --> 00:42:25,008
Water, water everywhere and
lo the boards did shrink.

861
00:42:28,810 --> 00:42:31,833
Water, water everywhere,

862
00:42:32,333 --> 00:42:34,333
and not a drip to drink.

863
00:42:35,660 --> 00:42:36,863
So, what's your plan?

864
00:42:37,970 --> 00:42:39,004
Sail into New York with

865
00:42:39,004 --> 00:42:41,493
your tighty-whities tied to the tower?

866
00:42:41,530 --> 00:42:43,350
You Americans are only sailing

867
00:42:43,350 --> 00:42:46,463
in the North Atlantic on the
shipping lines to England.

868
00:42:46,790 --> 00:42:49,823
We should slip in unnoticed I think.

869
00:42:51,350 --> 00:42:53,903
I give ya high marks for bein' optimistic.

870
00:42:55,420 --> 00:42:57,670
So, how did you end up
in this racket anyway?

871
00:42:57,696 --> 00:43:00,833
Oh, the pay was okay.

872
00:43:01,410 --> 00:43:03,093
The pension was very generous.

873
00:43:03,240 --> 00:43:04,703
[Captain McCloud] Fair enough.

874
00:43:05,320 --> 00:43:06,153
Is it fair?

875
00:43:07,140 --> 00:43:08,923
Is it fair, McCloud that you will

876
00:43:08,923 --> 00:43:11,840
be remembered as a hero
when this is all over

877
00:43:11,890 --> 00:43:14,593
while I and my crew must
be certainly go to prison?

878
00:43:14,677 --> 00:43:16,970
I thought you Germans enjoyed losing?

879
00:43:16,970 --> 00:43:19,323
You certainly get a lotta practice.

880
00:43:19,400 --> 00:43:20,961
Need I remind you that your life

881
00:43:20,961 --> 00:43:24,403
and the life of your crew are in my hands?

882
00:43:24,478 --> 00:43:26,090
I get it, Commander.

883
00:43:26,090 --> 00:43:28,993
And I'm playin' along nice.

884
00:43:29,876 --> 00:43:32,763
I have something to tell
you that you won't believe.

885
00:43:33,012 --> 00:43:34,690
[Captain McCloud] Go ahead, Rudy, try me.

886
00:43:34,690 --> 00:43:36,513
When this is all over,

887
00:43:36,953 --> 00:43:39,083
I am going to go into show biz.

888
00:43:40,109 --> 00:43:41,483
You don't say.

889
00:43:41,680 --> 00:43:42,590
After my release I'll still

890
00:43:42,590 --> 00:43:45,053
have plenty of time to
make it to Broadway.

891
00:43:46,120 --> 00:43:47,375
Maybe that's the real reason

892
00:43:47,375 --> 00:43:50,113
I am taking the ship to New York.

893
00:43:50,560 --> 00:43:52,060
Did you ever think about that?

894
00:43:52,690 --> 00:43:55,753
No, Rudy, that hadn't
occurred to me at all.

895
00:43:56,630 --> 00:43:58,343
I am a singing and dancing fool.

896
00:44:00,900 --> 00:44:03,963
You scratch my back,
I scratch yours maybe.

897
00:44:05,577 --> 00:44:08,503
So let me get this straight, Bojangles.

898
00:44:09,390 --> 00:44:11,040
I put in the good word for you,

899
00:44:11,040 --> 00:44:14,710
and you guarantee safe
passage for me and my crew

900
00:44:14,710 --> 00:44:18,873
as your prisoners aboard
the good ol' UBoat 666?

901
00:44:19,050 --> 00:44:20,150
Something like that.

902
00:44:21,360 --> 00:44:23,210
What about Uncle Creepy back there?

903
00:44:23,430 --> 00:44:24,263
Gluhwein?

904
00:44:25,570 --> 00:44:26,920
You let me worry about him.

905
00:44:27,220 --> 00:44:29,300
[Captain McCloud] All right,
Rudy, I'll think about it.

906
00:44:29,300 --> 00:44:31,713
You guys need any help with anything?

907
00:44:32,900 --> 00:44:33,873
Anything at all?

908
00:44:35,145 --> 00:44:37,323
Why don't you let me show her the wheel?

909
00:44:37,630 --> 00:44:39,563
We may need a steady hand on it.

910
00:44:40,720 --> 00:44:42,852
Yes, good idea.

911
00:44:42,852 --> 00:44:45,519
(pensive music)

912
00:44:48,600 --> 00:44:49,763
This is the wheel.

913
00:44:50,490 --> 00:44:51,323
This?

914
00:44:51,660 --> 00:44:53,153
Are you sure?

915
00:44:53,500 --> 00:44:55,703
Knock it off and pay attention.

916
00:44:55,970 --> 00:44:58,963
It may save all our lives.

917
00:44:59,050 --> 00:45:00,372
So you figure anything out?

918
00:45:00,372 --> 00:45:04,573
Yes, everyone on this ship is crazy.

919
00:45:05,431 --> 00:45:06,593
That's all I know.

920
00:45:07,875 --> 00:45:08,943
See?

921
00:45:09,233 --> 00:45:11,043
It's just like riding a bicycle.

922
00:45:11,043 --> 00:45:16,043
(Captain McCloud laughs)
(Scarlet laughs)

923
00:45:18,474 --> 00:45:19,391
Ring, ring.

924
00:45:19,493 --> 00:45:21,811
Ring, ring (laughs).

925
00:45:21,811 --> 00:45:24,309
-Like a bike bell.
-Like, right.

926
00:45:24,309 --> 00:45:29,309
(Captain McCloud laughs)
(Scarlet laughs)

927
00:45:31,880 --> 00:45:33,520
You get a look at Ribbonclerk?

928
00:45:33,520 --> 00:45:34,770
Yes, he looks terrible.

929
00:45:35,290 --> 00:45:37,140
Everyone on this ship looks terrible.

930
00:45:37,140 --> 00:45:38,153
What's going on?

931
00:45:38,153 --> 00:45:39,403
I don't know.

932
00:45:39,540 --> 00:45:42,373
It could be some kind
of Teutonic super flu.

933
00:45:43,430 --> 00:45:45,127
Then again, maybe they have

934
00:45:45,127 --> 00:45:47,720
an atomic bomb stashed in the back.

935
00:45:47,720 --> 00:45:49,610
-A bomb?
-Just shush, shush,

936
00:45:49,610 --> 00:45:51,963
shay, shay, shape.

937
00:45:52,100 --> 00:45:56,623
Would you look at the shape of this thing?

938
00:45:56,869 --> 00:46:00,083
Man, I love this shape.

939
00:46:01,030 --> 00:46:05,899
It's just a theory but it
could be radiation sickness.

940
00:46:05,899 --> 00:46:07,805
(pensive music)

941
00:46:07,805 --> 00:46:09,200
Herr Roosevelt, why don't you teach

942
00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:11,083
me some American phrases?

943
00:46:11,170 --> 00:46:12,420
I want to blend right in.

944
00:46:13,460 --> 00:46:14,410
Nuns On Ripple.

945
00:46:14,410 --> 00:46:15,457
Nuns On Ripple.

946
00:46:16,207 --> 00:46:17,510
Oh, that sounds naughty.

947
00:46:17,510 --> 00:46:18,493
What does it mean?

948
00:46:19,420 --> 00:46:20,653
That's how we say no.

949
00:46:21,227 --> 00:46:22,060
Hm.

950
00:46:22,060 --> 00:46:24,223
Ask me something that I can say no to.

951
00:46:25,390 --> 00:46:27,288
You think we gon' survive on this ship?

952
00:46:27,288 --> 00:46:28,653
Nuns On Ripple.

953
00:46:29,720 --> 00:46:30,663
Was this right?

954
00:46:31,316 --> 00:46:32,667
It was a'ight man.

955
00:46:32,667 --> 00:46:34,383
It's all right, man.

956
00:46:36,140 --> 00:46:37,033
It's all right.

957
00:46:39,882 --> 00:46:41,132
It's all right.

958
00:46:41,167 --> 00:46:43,570
[Roosevelt] Yo, Schweiger,
I think I got somethin'.

959
00:46:43,570 --> 00:46:44,920
It sounds like a lawnmower.

960
00:46:45,130 --> 00:46:47,310
A lawnmower, what is that?

961
00:46:48,473 --> 00:46:49,440
What is it?

962
00:46:49,440 --> 00:46:50,850
Shit, I don't know.

963
00:46:51,462 --> 00:46:52,512
I've got something.

964
00:46:53,100 --> 00:46:54,613
23 degrees north.

965
00:46:54,810 --> 00:46:56,920
Herr Roosevelt, get out of the way.

966
00:46:59,800 --> 00:47:02,250
What we need is a good
pair of German ears, yeah?

967
00:47:03,070 --> 00:47:04,870
Meine come to the intercom.

968
00:47:04,870 --> 00:47:07,780
It's essentially virtual
3D modeling using some

969
00:47:07,780 --> 00:47:10,803
of the same techniques employed
in modern architecture.

970
00:47:11,040 --> 00:47:13,415
Of course, there is a proprietary currency

971
00:47:13,415 --> 00:47:15,470
which monetizes the value.

972
00:47:15,470 --> 00:47:16,783
Shut up you fool.

973
00:47:17,180 --> 00:47:18,013
Meine?

974
00:47:18,768 --> 00:47:21,601
(engine chugging)

975
00:47:22,240 --> 00:47:23,296
[Meine] Yes, Commander?

976
00:47:23,296 --> 00:47:25,513
Is the port engine repaired yet?

977
00:47:26,030 --> 00:47:27,520
[Meine] It's working but I don't know

978
00:47:27,520 --> 00:47:28,820
how long it will last.

979
00:47:28,820 --> 00:47:30,410
[Braunschweiger] Come to
the command deck at once.

980
00:47:30,410 --> 00:47:31,260
Yes, Commander.

981
00:47:32,155 --> 00:47:34,280
I have to go to the command deck now

982
00:47:34,390 --> 00:47:35,640
to talk to the Commander.

983
00:47:35,750 --> 00:47:36,853
Are you in trouble?

984
00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:38,370
No, I'm not in trouble.

985
00:47:38,370 --> 00:47:40,500
He probably just wants to hang out.

986
00:47:40,500 --> 00:47:41,333
Cool.

987
00:47:41,570 --> 00:47:42,683
Get over here.

988
00:47:44,520 --> 00:47:46,320
Put your hands on that throttle

989
00:47:46,320 --> 00:47:49,073
and don't let it leave until I return.

990
00:47:49,271 --> 00:47:50,410
You got it?

991
00:47:50,410 --> 00:47:51,303
I think so.

992
00:47:52,120 --> 00:47:53,720
What do you mean you think so?

993
00:47:53,720 --> 00:47:55,213
It's right in your hand.

994
00:47:55,330 --> 00:47:56,223
What do I do?

995
00:47:56,450 --> 00:47:58,143
Don't do anything.

996
00:47:58,370 --> 00:48:00,400
Just do not move.

997
00:48:00,400 --> 00:48:01,233
I can do that.

998
00:48:01,326 --> 00:48:04,159
(engine chugging)

999
00:48:06,672 --> 00:48:11,672
(hatch creaking)
(pensive music)

1000
00:48:12,137 --> 00:48:13,533
-[Gluhwein] Meine!
(Meine gasps)

1001
00:48:13,533 --> 00:48:14,550
[Meine] Heil Donitz!

1002
00:48:14,550 --> 00:48:15,600
Heil Donitz.

1003
00:48:15,600 --> 00:48:16,683
You know something?

1004
00:48:17,130 --> 00:48:18,530
I'm actually getting used to it.

1005
00:48:18,530 --> 00:48:20,560
Herr Gluhwein, I must
get to the command deck.

1006
00:48:20,560 --> 00:48:21,643
In a moment.

1007
00:48:21,870 --> 00:48:23,570
Is everything in order back there?

1008
00:48:23,770 --> 00:48:24,973
-Yeah.
-Good!

1009
00:48:25,450 --> 00:48:27,213
So the arrangements have been made.

1010
00:48:27,280 --> 00:48:28,453
All is in order.

1011
00:48:28,846 --> 00:48:29,679
Yeah.

1012
00:48:29,679 --> 00:48:30,550
Off you go.

1013
00:48:30,550 --> 00:48:35,550
(engine chugging)
(pensive music)

1014
00:48:39,174 --> 00:48:41,558
(hatch slams)

1015
00:48:41,558 --> 00:48:45,391
Yeah, we all have a job
to do, yes, young man?

1016
00:48:47,007 --> 00:48:47,840
Yes.

1017
00:48:48,140 --> 00:48:49,583
Yes, we do.

1018
00:48:50,380 --> 00:48:53,013
And we don't take our jobs lightly, do we?

1019
00:48:53,530 --> 00:48:54,375
No.

1020
00:48:54,375 --> 00:48:56,293
No, we don't.

1021
00:48:58,264 --> 00:49:00,173
Work makes us free.

1022
00:49:01,000 --> 00:49:03,313
Would you not say that is true?

1023
00:49:04,450 --> 00:49:05,363
Maybe.

1024
00:49:06,450 --> 00:49:10,563
You will be soon, young man.

1025
00:49:11,160 --> 00:49:12,432
Free at last.

1026
00:49:12,432 --> 00:49:15,099
(pensive music)

1027
00:49:15,970 --> 00:49:17,012
Yeah, he's correct.

1028
00:49:17,012 --> 00:49:19,223
It sounds like some kind of motor.

1029
00:49:20,450 --> 00:49:21,283
What are they?

1030
00:49:22,870 --> 00:49:25,953
Captain McCloud, please
take a look at this.

1031
00:49:31,959 --> 00:49:32,792
(engine whirring)

1032
00:49:32,910 --> 00:49:33,743
Well?

1033
00:49:34,026 --> 00:49:34,859
What is it?

1034
00:49:35,207 --> 00:49:38,453
Some new allied super weapon?

1035
00:49:39,550 --> 00:49:43,733
It's a new thing called jet skis.

1036
00:49:44,180 --> 00:49:45,723
Jet skis?

1037
00:49:46,350 --> 00:49:49,403
It's an experimental craft,

1038
00:49:49,580 --> 00:49:51,378
used mostly on lakes and small bodies

1039
00:49:51,378 --> 00:49:53,313
of water to terrorize civilians.

1040
00:49:54,100 --> 00:49:55,283
Very effective.

1041
00:49:55,760 --> 00:49:56,612
But harmless.

1042
00:49:56,612 --> 00:49:59,279
(pensive music)

1043
00:50:00,050 --> 00:50:03,026
I've never seen anything
like it in my life.

1044
00:50:03,026 --> 00:50:03,943
Herr Meine,

1045
00:50:05,880 --> 00:50:06,823
stand by.

1046
00:50:07,690 --> 00:50:10,320
We may have to make a trip
to the forward torpedo bay.

1047
00:50:10,320 --> 00:50:11,203
Yes, Commander.

1048
00:50:11,337 --> 00:50:16,337
(engine chugging)
(pensive music)

1049
00:50:22,857 --> 00:50:23,690
Yes!

1050
00:50:23,905 --> 00:50:26,053
[Gluhwein] What is all the commotion?

1051
00:50:26,140 --> 00:50:28,803
It looks like several leisure vehicles.

1052
00:50:28,960 --> 00:50:30,269
Let me take a look.

1053
00:50:30,269 --> 00:50:32,936
(pensive music)

1054
00:50:34,126 --> 00:50:38,813
So, some kind of motorcycle for the water.

1055
00:50:39,770 --> 00:50:42,193
They may have made us on radar.

1056
00:50:42,320 --> 00:50:43,200
I seriously doubt that.

1057
00:50:43,200 --> 00:50:46,093
We'll have to sink them I'm afraid.

1058
00:50:46,170 --> 00:50:47,053
Sink them?

1059
00:50:47,440 --> 00:50:48,273
Torpedoes.

1060
00:50:48,840 --> 00:50:50,955
Look, as fun as it would be

1061
00:50:50,955 --> 00:50:53,453
to torpedo a couple of jet skiers,

1062
00:50:53,870 --> 00:50:55,243
you'd just be wasting ammo.

1063
00:50:55,580 --> 00:50:57,493
We can't take that chance.

1064
00:50:58,100 --> 00:51:02,943
Meine, take Valentiner and
prepare a torpedo, please.

1065
00:51:03,070 --> 00:51:05,567
This is still my ship, is it not?

1066
00:51:05,869 --> 00:51:09,983
We are not going to have this
conversation again are we?

1067
00:51:10,330 --> 00:51:11,765
It's very tiresome.

1068
00:51:11,765 --> 00:51:13,738
Yes, you are the commander

1069
00:51:13,738 --> 00:51:16,654
but this ship belongs to the Reich!

1070
00:51:16,654 --> 00:51:18,763
God damn it, Gluhwein.

1071
00:51:18,858 --> 00:51:20,563
Isn't the Reich the people?

1072
00:51:20,950 --> 00:51:21,783
Of course.

1073
00:51:21,880 --> 00:51:25,123
Well, isn't Rudy one of the people?

1074
00:51:25,630 --> 00:51:30,033
I say he is and so then the
whole ship belongs to us.

1075
00:51:30,233 --> 00:51:33,133
Go ahead, tell him, Commander.

1076
00:51:33,849 --> 00:51:34,932
Valentiner?

1077
00:51:38,410 --> 00:51:39,760
Herr Gluhwein is correct.

1078
00:51:40,860 --> 00:51:42,510
They may have made us on radar.

1079
00:51:42,700 --> 00:51:44,386
What kind of Americans are you?

1080
00:51:44,386 --> 00:51:47,822
As much as I'd enjoy watching
you die, don't be an idiot.

1081
00:51:47,822 --> 00:51:51,790
It is not my first choice
to fire a gun on the ship,

1082
00:51:51,790 --> 00:51:53,350
but I assure you First Mate, Ribbonclerk

1083
00:51:53,350 --> 00:51:55,710
of the United States Navy,

1084
00:51:55,710 --> 00:51:58,760
I will, without hesitation if you

1085
00:51:58,760 --> 00:52:01,090
do not immediately return to your post.

1086
00:52:01,090 --> 00:52:01,923
Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow up.

1087
00:52:01,923 --> 00:52:03,563
I thought we were all friends here.

1088
00:52:03,730 --> 00:52:04,563
What happened?

1089
00:52:04,600 --> 00:52:06,230
Friends don't stop friends

1090
00:52:06,230 --> 00:52:08,440
from shooting torpedoes when they need to.

1091
00:52:08,440 --> 00:52:09,740
I'm gonna miss you, Bierficker.

1092
00:52:09,740 --> 00:52:11,040
See you on the other side.

1093
00:52:11,160 --> 00:52:13,513
Oh, before I forget, you lose the war.

1094
00:52:13,570 --> 00:52:16,603
Half your country gets owned
by Russia for 40 years,

1095
00:52:16,620 --> 00:52:18,170
then what's left of Germany adopts

1096
00:52:18,170 --> 00:52:20,710
the same currency as Greece and Poland

1097
00:52:20,740 --> 00:52:22,840
and you and the rest of Europe

1098
00:52:22,840 --> 00:52:26,170
goes slowly bankrupt while
China takes over the world.

1099
00:52:26,170 --> 00:52:28,824
Yeah and a woman becomes
Chancellor of Germany.

1100
00:52:28,824 --> 00:52:31,511
(Bierficker screams)

1101
00:52:31,740 --> 00:52:32,912
Have a nice day, asshole.

1102
00:52:32,912 --> 00:52:37,912
(shots firing)
(pensive music)

1103
00:52:52,267 --> 00:52:56,062
(thunder rumbling)
(eerie music)

1104
00:52:56,062 --> 00:52:57,290
(Roosevelt screams)
(eerie music)

1105
00:52:57,290 --> 00:53:02,290
(Gluhwein yells)
(eerie music)

1106
00:53:03,942 --> 00:53:06,275
Commander, give the order.

1107
00:53:07,273 --> 00:53:09,940
(pensive music)

1108
00:53:15,600 --> 00:53:18,563
Valentiner, Meine, is the torpedo ready?

1109
00:53:20,133 --> 00:53:21,777
There's sweat in my eye.

1110
00:53:21,777 --> 00:53:23,890
Get over it, I bleed sweat.

1111
00:53:23,890 --> 00:53:24,940
You're touching my hand.

1112
00:53:24,940 --> 00:53:26,401
It's the Navy, relax.

1113
00:53:26,401 --> 00:53:27,875
You are no help at all.

1114
00:53:27,875 --> 00:53:29,542
Valentiner, Meine?

1115
00:53:30,012 --> 00:53:31,567
Valentiner, Meine?

1116
00:53:32,260 --> 00:53:34,007
Okay, I get the radio,
you hold the torpedo.

1117
00:53:34,007 --> 00:53:34,840
(speaking in foreign language).

1118
00:53:34,840 --> 00:53:37,403
I will get the intercom
and you hold the torpedo.

1119
00:53:37,480 --> 00:53:38,313
It's (speaking in foreign language).

1120
00:53:38,313 --> 00:53:39,146
We cannot argue about this.

1121
00:53:39,146 --> 00:53:39,979
Well, look at the size of your arms.

1122
00:53:39,979 --> 00:53:40,950
You are an elephant.

1123
00:53:40,950 --> 00:53:42,180
I can't do it by myself.

1124
00:53:42,180 --> 00:53:43,013
It's too heavy.

1125
00:53:43,013 --> 00:53:44,417
Valentiner, Meine?

1126
00:53:44,417 --> 00:53:46,650
Okay, you will hold the
torpedo, I get the radio.

1127
00:53:46,650 --> 00:53:47,483
-I'll--
-Quick,

1128
00:53:47,483 --> 00:53:48,316
I can't hold it myself.

1129
00:53:48,316 --> 00:53:49,190
I got it last time.

1130
00:53:49,190 --> 00:53:50,820
No, I, we cannot argue about this.

1131
00:53:50,820 --> 00:53:52,667
We do not have time, it is too heavy.

1132
00:53:52,667 --> 00:53:54,263
It was never me.

1133
00:53:54,685 --> 00:53:55,570
Valentiner!

1134
00:53:55,570 --> 00:53:57,743
(Meine speaking in foreign language)

1135
00:53:57,743 --> 00:53:59,453
Your word, Commander?

1136
00:53:59,460 --> 00:54:00,603
Is the torpedo ready?

1137
00:54:00,603 --> 00:54:05,214
Yeah, yeah, yeah, we are
firing the torpedo right now.

1138
00:54:05,214 --> 00:54:06,047
Are we ready?

1139
00:54:06,047 --> 00:54:06,880
Yeah.

1140
00:54:07,910 --> 00:54:08,993
Fire torpedo.

1141
00:54:09,310 --> 00:54:10,763
Firing torpedo.

1142
00:54:11,203 --> 00:54:13,870
(alarm blaring)

1143
00:54:14,361 --> 00:54:17,194
(torpedo booming)

1144
00:54:18,323 --> 00:54:19,323
Heil Donitz.

1145
00:54:22,755 --> 00:54:25,588
(waves splashing)

1146
00:54:25,733 --> 00:54:28,713
I have never seen a device
such as this before.

1147
00:54:29,090 --> 00:54:31,523
You must be a real super spy.

1148
00:54:31,800 --> 00:54:32,930
I'm not a spy.

1149
00:54:32,930 --> 00:54:34,964
Then explain your ridiculous disguise.

1150
00:54:34,964 --> 00:54:35,797
My disguise?

1151
00:54:36,536 --> 00:54:39,293
You belong on a coo coo clock.

1152
00:54:39,470 --> 00:54:40,839
Hey, press the top button

1153
00:54:40,839 --> 00:54:43,650
and the one on the side at
the same time and then--

1154
00:54:43,650 --> 00:54:47,153
And I blow up I suppose?

1155
00:54:47,610 --> 00:54:49,145
Not today super spy.

1156
00:54:49,145 --> 00:54:50,526
(phone clattering)

1157
00:54:50,526 --> 00:54:51,359
(glass shattering)

1158
00:54:51,359 --> 00:54:53,733
[Atticus] Oh man, that was the new iPhone.

1159
00:54:55,570 --> 00:54:56,403
What?

1160
00:54:56,403 --> 00:54:57,550
Nothing, it's just that I had

1161
00:54:57,550 --> 00:54:59,603
to spend half a day at the Apple store,

1162
00:54:59,660 --> 00:55:01,010
then another two days getting

1163
00:55:01,010 --> 00:55:03,383
it to work with all my sign in protocols.

1164
00:55:03,690 --> 00:55:05,744
You speak in many riddles.

1165
00:55:05,744 --> 00:55:07,351
I wish I had the chance to take

1166
00:55:07,351 --> 00:55:11,063
out my pliers and extract
each and every one of them.

1167
00:55:11,470 --> 00:55:13,890
Those would be figurative pliers, right?

1168
00:55:13,890 --> 00:55:14,723
Of course!

1169
00:55:14,723 --> 00:55:17,053
We are not monsters.

1170
00:55:17,320 --> 00:55:19,300
[Atticus] Hey, any chance
of my using the bathroom?

1171
00:55:19,300 --> 00:55:20,133
No!

1172
00:55:20,133 --> 00:55:20,966
You hear that, Meine?

1173
00:55:20,966 --> 00:55:22,913
No bathroom breaks.

1174
00:55:23,190 --> 00:55:25,310
Mr. Gluhwein, I think it's only fair

1175
00:55:25,310 --> 00:55:26,534
to tell you that I'll be reporting

1176
00:55:26,534 --> 00:55:29,173
you to the Mechanics Union
once we get to New York.

1177
00:55:29,201 --> 00:55:31,780
I have somebody I'd like you to meet.

1178
00:55:32,313 --> 00:55:34,240
I should be helping with the engines.

1179
00:55:34,240 --> 00:55:36,490
We have a more important
job for you to do.

1180
00:55:36,886 --> 00:55:39,553
(pensive music)

1181
00:56:09,937 --> 00:56:12,687
(dramatic music)

1182
00:56:20,580 --> 00:56:22,267
[Captain McCloud] Nice play, Commander.

1183
00:56:22,267 --> 00:56:25,793
Real backbone shooting those kids.

1184
00:56:26,040 --> 00:56:28,113
There were no children out there.

1185
00:56:28,210 --> 00:56:31,510
Each was at least as old
as Lieutenant Bierficker

1186
00:56:32,050 --> 00:56:34,023
and he was a fully grown man.

1187
00:56:34,490 --> 00:56:37,993
I'm getting real tired of
these little war games, Rudy.

1188
00:56:38,440 --> 00:56:40,230
And I am getting tired of hearing

1189
00:56:40,230 --> 00:56:42,660
your opinions on how I run my ship.

1190
00:56:42,660 --> 00:56:43,493
Commander!

1191
00:56:43,820 --> 00:56:45,720
The woodsman has just been killed.

1192
00:56:45,720 --> 00:56:46,553
Atticus?

1193
00:56:46,580 --> 00:56:47,413
What happened to him?

1194
00:56:47,413 --> 00:56:49,483
He was trying to kill Meine and myself

1195
00:56:49,483 --> 00:56:51,633
using a super spy phone.

1196
00:56:52,120 --> 00:56:54,330
A struggle ensued and he was killed.

1197
00:56:54,330 --> 00:56:56,563
In light of present circumstances,

1198
00:56:56,850 --> 00:56:57,968
I insist you let us say

1199
00:56:57,968 --> 00:57:01,648
a few words over our dead solider, alone!

1200
00:57:01,648 --> 00:57:04,813
I'm afraid that will
be out of the question.

1201
00:57:05,380 --> 00:57:08,193
All right, Rudy, have it your way.

1202
00:57:08,830 --> 00:57:11,620
Sure, do whatever you want with us.

1203
00:57:11,620 --> 00:57:14,270
Shoot us, stab us, throw us back

1204
00:57:14,270 --> 00:57:16,513
in the briny blue for all I care.

1205
00:57:16,860 --> 00:57:18,843
None of us signed up for this.

1206
00:57:18,930 --> 00:57:20,983
You killed one of us already.

1207
00:57:22,300 --> 00:57:23,633
-Two.
-Huh?

1208
00:57:24,111 --> 00:57:25,973
Right, Atticus, I forgot.

1209
00:57:26,060 --> 00:57:27,943
You killed two of us already.

1210
00:57:28,410 --> 00:57:29,637
If you want our help surrendering

1211
00:57:29,637 --> 00:57:31,963
this shit can to the Big Apple,

1212
00:57:32,002 --> 00:57:34,973
you'll give us five
minutes to say a prayer.

1213
00:57:35,257 --> 00:57:36,493
Take it or leave it.

1214
00:57:41,558 --> 00:57:43,225
All right everybody!

1215
00:57:43,740 --> 00:57:46,940
Let's say a little prayer
for Ribbonclerk and Atticus.

1216
00:57:46,940 --> 00:57:49,180
Braunschweiger's just doing what

1217
00:57:49,180 --> 00:57:52,033
he has to do to protect
his men and his ship.

1218
00:57:52,580 --> 00:57:55,963
Remember, we were all in this together.

1219
00:57:56,060 --> 00:57:57,783
Just stayin' alive.

1220
00:57:58,329 --> 00:58:00,593
God bless America.

1221
00:58:06,263 --> 00:58:09,040
All right, look, I'm pretty sure

1222
00:58:09,040 --> 00:58:11,973
I was wrong about these
guys havin' an atomic bomb.

1223
00:58:11,990 --> 00:58:13,950
You thought there was a A bomb on here?

1224
00:58:13,950 --> 00:58:14,783
Where?

1225
00:58:15,300 --> 00:58:17,900
I thought maybe somewhere
in the rear of the ship.

1226
00:58:18,310 --> 00:58:19,510
I didn't wanna scare anybody.

1227
00:58:19,510 --> 00:58:20,633
I wanted to make sure.

1228
00:58:21,700 --> 00:58:23,687
Everybody on here looked sick,

1229
00:58:23,687 --> 00:58:25,823
and they have a skeleton screw.

1230
00:58:26,023 --> 00:58:28,973
I never bought Rudy's story.

1231
00:58:29,000 --> 00:58:32,500
Maybe they has an atomic
bomb and a vampire.

1232
00:58:32,500 --> 00:58:35,300
Radiation sickness doesn't
make you immune to bullets.

1233
00:58:36,000 --> 00:58:38,163
I think they picked us up for dinner.

1234
00:58:38,880 --> 00:58:41,099
They had already gone
through most of their crew.

1235
00:58:41,099 --> 00:58:44,163
When they saw us floating
out there in the water,

1236
00:58:44,305 --> 00:58:46,263
they couldn't pass it up.

1237
00:58:46,263 --> 00:58:49,827
(hatch unlatching)
(pensive music)

1238
00:58:49,827 --> 00:58:51,217
What do we have here, hm?

1239
00:58:57,800 --> 00:58:58,990
Hm?

1240
00:58:58,990 --> 00:59:00,073
What is this?

1241
00:59:00,822 --> 00:59:01,655
Naughty.

1242
00:59:03,388 --> 00:59:05,693
So, this is your little
prayer circle is it, hm?

1243
00:59:09,025 --> 00:59:09,858
Yeah?

1244
00:59:10,139 --> 00:59:12,248
Well, I hope your prayers are answered

1245
00:59:12,330 --> 00:59:13,542
my little American friends.

1246
00:59:13,542 --> 00:59:15,633
Yeah, best of luck.

1247
00:59:16,030 --> 00:59:17,070
What you better be praying is

1248
00:59:17,070 --> 00:59:19,284
that Commander Braunschweiger
and Herr Gluhwein

1249
00:59:19,284 --> 00:59:22,129
show mercy on your or you will be going

1250
00:59:22,129 --> 00:59:26,623
the way of your dead comrades and die.

1251
00:59:26,706 --> 00:59:29,373
(pensive music)

1252
00:59:29,700 --> 00:59:30,533
Yeah, yeah.

1253
00:59:31,440 --> 00:59:33,860
It was a little overboard,
little improv I cooked up.

1254
00:59:33,860 --> 00:59:34,693
I'm sorry.

1255
00:59:34,693 --> 00:59:36,400
Please, I want to help you.

1256
00:59:36,400 --> 00:59:38,650
Man, you must think we
as dumb as you look.

1257
00:59:39,150 --> 00:59:40,880
I knew there was a vampire, yeah?

1258
00:59:40,880 --> 00:59:44,560
But I could not say anything
or Gluhwein would kill me.

1259
00:59:44,560 --> 00:59:47,690
We're not gonna say anything,
Valentiner, so fuck off.

1260
00:59:47,690 --> 00:59:50,463
On the reals, there is a vampire?

1261
00:59:50,630 --> 00:59:53,003
I have not seen it but there must be.

1262
00:59:53,058 --> 00:59:55,137
When we left France a month ago,

1263
00:59:55,220 --> 00:59:58,673
yeah, 15 of our men all died the same way.

1264
00:59:58,684 --> 00:59:59,517
Ee!

1265
00:59:59,870 --> 01:00:01,913
Gluhwein is protecting it.

1266
01:00:01,980 --> 01:00:03,350
This is the only answer.

1267
01:00:03,350 --> 01:00:06,470
And he is the only one with the key

1268
01:00:06,470 --> 01:00:07,943
to the real torpedo bay.

1269
01:00:08,710 --> 01:00:09,780
-Man, I think he's lyin'.
-Yeah.

1270
01:00:09,780 --> 01:00:11,877
No, I am, I am not lying.

1271
01:00:12,907 --> 01:00:14,213
I want to help.

1272
01:00:14,980 --> 01:00:16,593
I love Americans, yeah.

1273
01:00:17,640 --> 01:00:22,063
Baseball, yeah, Cracker
Jacks, frankfurter.

1274
01:00:24,820 --> 01:00:26,120
How can I prove it to you?

1275
01:00:26,920 --> 01:00:29,133
Why don't you start by killing yourself?

1276
01:00:30,400 --> 01:00:32,150
I have an idea, yeah, yeah, yeah.

1277
01:00:33,274 --> 01:00:34,974
When we pull into New York Harbor,

1278
01:00:35,170 --> 01:00:37,263
you give me something dangerous to do,

1279
01:00:37,360 --> 01:00:42,283
something exciting, something
like in a Hollywood movie.

1280
01:00:42,450 --> 01:00:43,283
What makes you think

1281
01:00:43,283 --> 01:00:45,633
we can trust you, Lieutenant Valentiner?

1282
01:00:47,446 --> 01:00:49,333
Well, you have to trust somebody.

1283
01:00:49,380 --> 01:00:51,323
Shit, I don't trust anybody.

1284
01:00:51,670 --> 01:00:53,253
Nazis, vampires.

1285
01:00:53,400 --> 01:00:55,150
Where's it end with you people?

1286
01:00:55,150 --> 01:00:57,050
We're pulling into New York tonight.

1287
01:00:57,052 --> 01:01:00,020
We've got to play along
until the right moment

1288
01:01:00,730 --> 01:01:02,343
and then take over the ship.

1289
01:01:03,120 --> 01:01:05,620
Everybody listen up, I'm
not gonna sugarcoat this.

1290
01:01:06,659 --> 01:01:10,043
It's going to be of moderate
to strong difficulty.

1291
01:01:10,452 --> 01:01:13,119
(pensive music)

1292
01:01:25,208 --> 01:01:27,541
All right, Rudy, this is it.

1293
01:01:28,253 --> 01:01:30,140
We move any closer to the coast

1294
01:01:30,140 --> 01:01:32,143
and they'll pick us up for sure.

1295
01:01:32,220 --> 01:01:33,680
The Allies are much further north

1296
01:01:33,680 --> 01:01:36,713
on the shipping lines, they
won't even be looking for us.

1297
01:01:37,000 --> 01:01:38,420
Captain, you gonna tell him?

1298
01:01:38,420 --> 01:01:42,010
Rudy, there's no chance we'll make it in.

1299
01:01:42,010 --> 01:01:43,608
You don't understand.

1300
01:01:43,608 --> 01:01:46,733
The United States has changed.

1301
01:01:47,500 --> 01:01:50,463
You mean more jet skis?

1302
01:01:51,010 --> 01:01:52,940
Definitely a lot of those,

1303
01:01:52,940 --> 01:01:54,833
but I think you should know,

1304
01:01:55,030 --> 01:01:57,733
the date is later than you think it is.

1305
01:01:57,930 --> 01:01:59,957
Commander, I personally guarantee

1306
01:01:59,957 --> 01:02:02,313
our safe passage into the New York Harbor.

1307
01:02:03,678 --> 01:02:05,213
Meine, cut the engines!

1308
01:02:06,760 --> 01:02:08,633
[Braunschweiger] What
are you doing Gluhwein?

1309
01:02:08,810 --> 01:02:11,297
We will enter unseen and unexpected...

1310
01:02:11,297 --> 01:02:16,297
(ship clanging)
(pensive music)

1311
01:02:24,196 --> 01:02:26,023
We're moving faster now.

1312
01:02:26,713 --> 01:02:28,573
But how with no engines?

1313
01:02:28,850 --> 01:02:31,433
I told you there was
nothing to worry about.

1314
01:02:32,150 --> 01:02:33,943
This cannot be correct.

1315
01:02:34,690 --> 01:02:37,595
It says we are sailing at over 100 knots.

1316
01:02:37,595 --> 01:02:39,345
That is impossible.

1317
01:02:40,587 --> 01:02:42,200
[Valentiner] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

1318
01:02:42,200 --> 01:02:45,283
40 degrees north, 74 degrees west.

1319
01:02:45,410 --> 01:02:47,103
[Captain McCloud] The Statue of Liberty!

1320
01:02:49,056 --> 01:02:51,333
Valentiner, up bubble three degrees.

1321
01:02:51,810 --> 01:02:53,660
Commander, I use the toilet please?

1322
01:02:53,895 --> 01:02:55,582
Stay at your post, Valentiner.

1323
01:02:55,582 --> 01:02:57,159
I am touching cloth.

1324
01:02:57,159 --> 01:02:58,770
(Valentiner speaking in
foreign language) please?

1325
01:02:58,770 --> 01:03:02,263
Look, I'll take the controls
while he hits the can.

1326
01:03:02,370 --> 01:03:04,220
Better that than stink up the whole deck.

1327
01:03:04,220 --> 01:03:06,570
'Schweiger, I got somethin'
on the radio, man.

1328
01:03:07,190 --> 01:03:08,540
-Switch to the overhead.
-Coast Guard here.

1329
01:03:08,540 --> 01:03:11,095
(radio static crackling)

1330
01:03:11,340 --> 01:03:12,810
Unknown vessel, identify yourself.

1331
01:03:12,810 --> 01:03:14,590
Repeat, identify yourself immediately.

1332
01:03:14,590 --> 01:03:15,423
Over.

1333
01:03:16,305 --> 01:03:17,138
Who is this?

1334
01:03:17,138 --> 01:03:18,920
[Coast Guard] This is
the U.S. Coast Guard.

1335
01:03:18,920 --> 01:03:19,836
Who are you and what
the fuck are you doin'

1336
01:03:19,836 --> 01:03:22,010
in my harbor with that old piece of shit?

1337
01:03:24,810 --> 01:03:26,141
You have seen the ship?

1338
01:03:26,141 --> 01:03:28,693
[Coast Guard] Yeah, numb
nuts, we see your ship.

1339
01:03:28,970 --> 01:03:30,567
You're not cleared for
historical craft passage

1340
01:03:30,567 --> 01:03:33,367
through this harbor, especially
not one as ugly as that.

1341
01:03:33,704 --> 01:03:35,434
Where the fuck did you dig that thing out?

1342
01:03:35,434 --> 01:03:37,707
Thought the only Uboat
was in the Chicago Museum.

1343
01:03:37,707 --> 01:03:39,124
Chicago Museum?

1344
01:03:40,318 --> 01:03:41,735
Historical craft?

1345
01:03:43,043 --> 01:03:45,833
(toilet seat thuds)
(pensive music)

1346
01:03:45,833 --> 01:03:47,773
(gun cocks)

1347
01:03:47,773 --> 01:03:49,513
It's for your own good, Rudy.

1348
01:03:50,580 --> 01:03:53,080
Why don't you take a stand
over there by the wall.

1349
01:03:53,830 --> 01:03:57,853
Stay there nice and easy and
we may make it out of this.

1350
01:03:58,020 --> 01:04:01,623
Scarlet, point this at his balls.

1351
01:04:02,020 --> 01:04:05,451
If he makes a move,
shoot to kill his balls.

1352
01:04:05,451 --> 01:04:06,375
(gun cocks)

1353
01:04:06,375 --> 01:04:07,933
My pleasure, Captain.

1354
01:04:08,291 --> 01:04:11,633
Valentiner, this is going in your report.

1355
01:04:12,700 --> 01:04:13,843
Here it is.

1356
01:04:15,150 --> 01:04:15,983
Why don't you tell us what

1357
01:04:15,983 --> 01:04:18,000
we're gonna find back there, Commander.

1358
01:04:18,000 --> 01:04:20,373
It was installed before we left Germany.

1359
01:04:20,780 --> 01:04:21,613
I don't know.

1360
01:04:22,108 --> 01:04:25,463
Don't move or I start blasting.

1361
01:04:26,430 --> 01:04:27,913
Hello, U.S.A?

1362
01:04:28,033 --> 01:04:29,200
[Coast Guard] Unknown craft,

1363
01:04:29,200 --> 01:04:30,777
you have 10 seconds to identify yourself

1364
01:04:30,777 --> 01:04:33,143
or we're gonna be on
you like flies on shit.

1365
01:04:33,300 --> 01:04:35,463
This is Captain Gavin McCloud.

1366
01:04:35,950 --> 01:04:37,633
I'm a cruise boatman.

1367
01:04:38,140 --> 01:04:40,333
Never wanted any of this war business.

1368
01:04:40,540 --> 01:04:41,720
Do not approach this ship,

1369
01:04:41,720 --> 01:04:44,026
repeat, do not approach this ship.

1370
01:04:44,026 --> 01:04:46,153
Dangerous cargo onboard.

1371
01:04:46,680 --> 01:04:48,890
[Coast Guard] What do you
mean dangerous, Captain?

1372
01:04:48,890 --> 01:04:51,440
We're gonna exit topside
and wait for assistance,

1373
01:04:51,530 --> 01:04:53,453
but do not board this boat.

1374
01:04:54,460 --> 01:04:55,293
Sink it!

1375
01:04:55,293 --> 01:05:00,124
(pensive music)
(alarm blaring)

1376
01:05:34,315 --> 01:05:37,232
(Roosevelt groans)

1377
01:05:37,379 --> 01:05:40,394
That a boy (groans).

1378
01:05:40,394 --> 01:05:41,894
That's a good boy.

1379
01:05:42,310 --> 01:05:43,143
Captain?

1380
01:05:43,143 --> 01:05:44,700
-I think so.
-I'm alive if

1381
01:05:44,700 --> 01:05:45,833
it matters to anyone.

1382
01:05:45,860 --> 01:05:46,760
Glad to hear it.

1383
01:05:47,530 --> 01:05:48,393
Where are we?

1384
01:05:48,440 --> 01:05:51,430
I've heard that question
one too many times lately.

1385
01:05:51,430 --> 01:05:53,549
It felt like we hit the
bottom of the ocean.

1386
01:05:53,549 --> 01:05:55,373
You still got that piece?

1387
01:05:55,440 --> 01:05:56,273
The gun?

1388
01:05:56,273 --> 01:05:57,164
-Right.
-No.

1389
01:05:57,164 --> 01:05:57,997
(shot firing)

1390
01:05:57,997 --> 01:05:59,493
What was that?

1391
01:06:00,223 --> 01:06:02,523
That would be Braunschweiger
shooting Meine,

1392
01:06:03,042 --> 01:06:04,510
if there's a God.

1393
01:06:04,510 --> 01:06:06,183
Meine took us down here?

1394
01:06:06,691 --> 01:06:07,524
Why?

1395
01:06:07,750 --> 01:06:09,133
He knew we were onto him,

1396
01:06:09,700 --> 01:06:12,193
and the precious cargo in the back.

1397
01:06:12,910 --> 01:06:14,310
With Gluhwein out of the picture

1398
01:06:14,310 --> 01:06:16,140
he had no choice I guess.

1399
01:06:16,140 --> 01:06:19,373
He figures it can survive
this with his help.

1400
01:06:20,195 --> 01:06:21,413
But we can't.

1401
01:06:21,564 --> 01:06:23,093
Why the fuck not?

1402
01:06:23,660 --> 01:06:26,640
With the engines off there can't be more

1403
01:06:26,640 --> 01:06:30,713
than maybe half an hour's
worth of oxygen coming our way,

1404
01:06:30,800 --> 01:06:33,513
but that thing in the back
doesn't need to breathe.

1405
01:06:34,426 --> 01:06:37,176
(hatch creaking)

1406
01:06:39,400 --> 01:06:42,983
(sighs) Captain McCloud.

1407
01:06:44,390 --> 01:06:47,523
I thought the German Navy was
famous for it's discipline.

1408
01:06:47,800 --> 01:06:49,383
Meine dove the ship.

1409
01:06:49,697 --> 01:06:52,520
He was headed to the rear torpedo bay

1410
01:06:52,520 --> 01:06:56,453
when I shot him with his
hand on the hatch wheel.

1411
01:06:56,760 --> 01:06:58,123
Are you sure he's dead?

1412
01:06:58,260 --> 01:06:59,170
What do you mean?

1413
01:06:59,170 --> 01:07:01,330
Yeah, that's a fair question on this ship.

1414
01:07:01,330 --> 01:07:02,443
Yes, he is dead.

1415
01:07:02,528 --> 01:07:04,771
But to be sure I put his head

1416
01:07:04,771 --> 01:07:08,920
in the piston rank and
I manually ground it--

1417
01:07:08,920 --> 01:07:09,753
Thank you, Commander.

1418
01:07:09,753 --> 01:07:11,032
We can fill it in from here.

1419
01:07:11,032 --> 01:07:12,115
Valentiner!

1420
01:07:12,612 --> 01:07:15,516
(Valentiner groaning)

1421
01:07:15,516 --> 01:07:20,516
Herr Roosevelt, I have
something for you (groans).

1422
01:07:22,470 --> 01:07:23,303
Take this.

1423
01:07:23,661 --> 01:07:25,830
Do not tell the others.

1424
01:07:26,453 --> 01:07:27,843
Am I going to die?

1425
01:07:28,700 --> 01:07:31,200
[Roosevelt] Nuns On Ripple,
man, Nuns On Ripple.

1426
01:07:32,477 --> 01:07:36,079
Do not leave me hanging (groans).

1427
01:07:36,079 --> 01:07:38,919
[Roosevelt] You'll be all right, man.

1428
01:07:38,919 --> 01:07:40,336
All right, man.

1429
01:07:44,860 --> 01:07:47,530
Gluhwein's body, where did it go?

1430
01:07:47,530 --> 01:07:49,930
That knock to the head
must've been temporary.

1431
01:07:50,720 --> 01:07:51,963
My guess is he's in the rear

1432
01:07:51,963 --> 01:07:54,653
of the ship with his secret cargo.

1433
01:07:58,660 --> 01:08:00,823
Everybody to the forward torpedo bay.

1434
01:08:01,101 --> 01:08:02,503
We ain't,

1435
01:08:07,756 --> 01:08:09,433
we ain't finished yet!

1436
01:08:09,433 --> 01:08:12,100
(ship creaking)

1437
01:08:15,640 --> 01:08:17,731
The good news is, I have half a pack

1438
01:08:17,731 --> 01:08:20,453
of sweet, sweet Thai sticks left.

1439
01:08:20,530 --> 01:08:24,133
The bad news is we've got
to find and kill that thing.

1440
01:08:24,650 --> 01:08:25,650
You mean Gluhwein?

1441
01:08:25,855 --> 01:08:30,855
Yeah, him too, but especially
whatever that thing is.

1442
01:08:31,400 --> 01:08:33,420
The Fuhrer's little surprise.

1443
01:08:33,420 --> 01:08:34,900
That thing must die before

1444
01:08:34,900 --> 01:08:37,184
it can escape the ship
and make it to New York,

1445
01:08:37,184 --> 01:08:39,470
because if it can make it there...

1446
01:08:39,610 --> 01:08:41,327
I just want to say this

1447
01:08:41,466 --> 01:08:44,330
is not typical of a German war craft.

1448
01:08:44,330 --> 01:08:47,513
I wouldn't want you to think
it was like this on every ship.

1449
01:08:48,220 --> 01:08:49,993
I take full responsibility.

1450
01:08:50,260 --> 01:08:54,395
Well, can't forget this.

1451
01:08:54,395 --> 01:08:56,743
Nice thinkin', Roosevelt.

1452
01:08:56,880 --> 01:08:57,733
Open it up.

1453
01:08:59,930 --> 01:09:00,920
We got a stake.

1454
01:09:02,950 --> 01:09:03,873
A cross.

1455
01:09:05,140 --> 01:09:06,290
There's a note in here.

1456
01:09:09,800 --> 01:09:10,907
It's in German.

1457
01:09:11,320 --> 01:09:13,470
Probably an instruction manual detailing

1458
01:09:13,470 --> 01:09:16,033
everything we need to know
to defeat this menace.

1459
01:09:16,130 --> 01:09:17,323
But what's it say?

1460
01:09:17,480 --> 01:09:19,260
Shit, I don't know.

1461
01:09:23,967 --> 01:09:25,377
"Best of luck."

1462
01:09:26,340 --> 01:09:29,493
The Coast Guard may be
sending divers to rescue us.

1463
01:09:29,770 --> 01:09:31,470
As long as that thing is onboard

1464
01:09:31,470 --> 01:09:32,803
we can't let that happen.

1465
01:09:32,904 --> 01:09:34,870
It would look good to the Americans

1466
01:09:34,870 --> 01:09:37,520
I think if they knew that I helped you

1467
01:09:37,890 --> 01:09:39,933
find the vampire and kill it.

1468
01:09:40,510 --> 01:09:42,737
We'll all be right behind you.

1469
01:09:43,010 --> 01:09:44,339
You can bet on that, Rudy,

1470
01:09:44,339 --> 01:09:46,763
because that's what Americans do,

1471
01:09:46,768 --> 01:09:49,275
stay right behind you grunting

1472
01:09:49,275 --> 01:09:52,593
and groaning and giving and sweating,

1473
01:09:52,850 --> 01:09:56,423
as hard as we can for
as long as we know how.

1474
01:09:57,349 --> 01:10:00,099
(big band music)

1475
01:11:25,820 --> 01:11:28,223
Gluhwein must be hiding somewhere else.

1476
01:11:28,770 --> 01:11:29,870
I'll take care of him.

1477
01:11:30,710 --> 01:11:32,623
You will have to kill the vampire.

1478
01:11:33,070 --> 01:11:36,020
Thanks, Commander but I was kinda hopin'

1479
01:11:36,020 --> 01:11:37,773
you'd come along, ya know?

1480
01:11:37,997 --> 01:11:40,253
For emotional support.

1481
01:11:40,370 --> 01:11:42,770
I will see you all in
the forward torpedo bay.

1482
01:11:43,783 --> 01:11:45,473
Best of luck, Captain.

1483
01:11:47,265 --> 01:11:52,265
(hatch creaking)
(pensive music)

1484
01:12:24,606 --> 01:12:29,606
(engine chugging)
(pensive music)

1485
01:12:51,445 --> 01:12:53,800
(shot firing)

1486
01:12:53,800 --> 01:12:57,674
Sayonara, Gluhwein.

1487
01:12:57,710 --> 01:12:59,627
Nice shootin', Rudy (screams).

1488
01:13:01,080 --> 01:13:03,173
(Scarlet screams)
(Roosevelt screams)

1489
01:13:03,360 --> 01:13:04,270
I don't mean to be the one

1490
01:13:04,270 --> 01:13:06,480
to yell fire in a crowded torpedo bay--

1491
01:13:06,480 --> 01:13:08,123
But we're all gonna die.

1492
01:13:08,530 --> 01:13:11,203
Okay, Roosevelt, come
through for me buddy.

1493
01:13:11,310 --> 01:13:12,380
What's the plan here?

1494
01:13:12,850 --> 01:13:14,224
[Roosevelt] I just peed a little bit.

1495
01:13:14,224 --> 01:13:17,057
(vampire hissing)

1496
01:13:19,340 --> 01:13:20,923
Just might.

1497
01:13:22,718 --> 01:13:24,841
[Scarlet] Is that holy water?

1498
01:13:24,841 --> 01:13:26,053
CBD oil.

1499
01:13:26,480 --> 01:13:28,173
I use it for my knees.

1500
01:13:28,173 --> 01:13:31,363
It might subdue the vampire.

1501
01:13:32,379 --> 01:13:33,764
-It's working.
-Yeah!

1502
01:13:33,764 --> 01:13:35,246
-Go, Captain McCloud.
-Yeah!

1503
01:13:35,246 --> 01:13:39,684
(Captain McCloud laughs)
(vampire groaning)

1504
01:13:39,684 --> 01:13:40,517
Yeah!

1505
01:13:40,760 --> 01:13:41,593
Ha!

1506
01:13:41,845 --> 01:13:46,845
(Captain McCloud screams)
(pensive music)

1507
01:13:52,332 --> 01:13:54,273
Quick, before it wears off,

1508
01:13:54,670 --> 01:13:56,120
throw that thing in the tube.

1509
01:13:58,519 --> 01:14:01,269
(wings flapping)

1510
01:14:03,364 --> 01:14:08,364
(pensive music)
(hatch slams)

1511
01:14:11,580 --> 01:14:15,080
Well, gang, onto the fun part.

1512
01:14:15,080 --> 01:14:19,283
All right lady and gentlemen and Rudy.

1513
01:14:20,180 --> 01:14:21,013
This is it.

1514
01:14:21,650 --> 01:14:25,913
The End of the Line, the O.K. Corral,

1515
01:14:26,045 --> 01:14:30,003
Custer's Last Stand, Waterloo.

1516
01:14:30,003 --> 01:14:32,037
We have 10 minutes of oxygen left.

1517
01:14:32,037 --> 01:14:33,633
Right, okay.

1518
01:14:33,920 --> 01:14:34,933
Thanks, Commander.

1519
01:14:35,120 --> 01:14:38,180
So, let's not waste it
standing around jawing all day

1520
01:14:38,920 --> 01:14:43,660
or night or whatever the hell
it is out there or in here.

1521
01:14:43,660 --> 01:14:44,763
Nine minutes.

1522
01:14:44,970 --> 01:14:48,060
Gluhwein served one useful
purpose on this Earth at least.

1523
01:14:48,060 --> 01:14:50,273
He showed us a way outta here.

1524
01:14:50,420 --> 01:14:51,973
Through the torpedo tubes.

1525
01:14:52,000 --> 01:14:53,633
-That's right.
-Oh no.

1526
01:14:53,830 --> 01:14:55,991
You not shootin' me outta no torpedo tube.

1527
01:14:55,991 --> 01:14:59,210
There is a theoretical
basis for survival at least.

1528
01:14:59,210 --> 01:15:00,760
It's the last play we have left.

1529
01:15:00,760 --> 01:15:04,493
So, who goes first?

1530
01:15:04,770 --> 01:15:05,939
We draw for it.

1531
01:15:05,939 --> 01:15:08,395
Whoever pulls the short one stays behind

1532
01:15:08,395 --> 01:15:10,383
to launch the rest of us off.

1533
01:15:10,530 --> 01:15:12,160
Wait, everybody calm down.

1534
01:15:12,160 --> 01:15:14,030
I mean, we gotta vote
on this first, right?

1535
01:15:14,030 --> 01:15:15,169
What's there to vote for?

1536
01:15:15,169 --> 01:15:17,480
You either take your chances out there

1537
01:15:17,820 --> 01:15:21,050
or slowly run out of air
and die for sure down here.

1538
01:15:21,050 --> 01:15:22,330
'Schweiger, why don't we go down here

1539
01:15:22,330 --> 01:15:23,163
and check under the hood and see

1540
01:15:23,163 --> 01:15:24,777
if we can get this thing goin' again?

1541
01:15:24,777 --> 01:15:29,294
It is possible but it may
take longer than five minutes

1542
01:15:29,294 --> 01:15:31,680
which is when the air cuts out.

1543
01:15:31,680 --> 01:15:33,513
You may not have to go, Roosevelt.

1544
01:15:34,800 --> 01:15:37,363
Someone's gotta pull
the short one after all.

1545
01:15:37,534 --> 01:15:40,534
(suspenseful music)

1546
01:15:48,048 --> 01:15:50,910
(Roosevelt exhales)

1547
01:15:50,910 --> 01:15:52,390
All right, (speaking in foreign language).

1548
01:15:52,390 --> 01:15:53,233
You made it.

1549
01:15:53,870 --> 01:15:54,863
In the tube you go.

1550
01:15:55,006 --> 01:15:57,673
(pensive music)

1551
01:16:00,462 --> 01:16:01,295
Captain?

1552
01:16:01,295 --> 01:16:03,170
[Captain McCloud] What is it, Roosevelt?

1553
01:16:03,170 --> 01:16:04,838
It was me that took your strawberries.

1554
01:16:04,838 --> 01:16:05,671
I know.

1555
01:16:05,671 --> 01:16:08,338
(pensive music)

1556
01:16:23,776 --> 01:16:26,693
(machine whirring)

1557
01:16:28,200 --> 01:16:29,063
Okay.

1558
01:16:30,290 --> 01:16:31,123
Who's next?

1559
01:16:33,120 --> 01:16:34,102
Ladies first.

1560
01:16:34,102 --> 01:16:39,102
(pensive music)
(water splashing)

1561
01:16:45,860 --> 01:16:47,323
See you up top, Captain?

1562
01:16:47,760 --> 01:16:49,273
It's not for me to say.

1563
01:16:49,650 --> 01:16:51,143
Who does get to say?

1564
01:16:51,740 --> 01:16:54,083
The big skipper in the sky,

1565
01:16:54,392 --> 01:16:57,773
puffing away at his trusty corncob pipe,

1566
01:16:58,090 --> 01:17:00,893
filling the air with cotton candy clouds.

1567
01:17:01,674 --> 01:17:03,693
That's quite an image.

1568
01:17:03,735 --> 01:17:04,735
Thank you.

1569
01:17:04,983 --> 01:17:06,730
I was being sarcastic.

1570
01:17:06,730 --> 01:17:07,563
I know.

1571
01:17:07,563 --> 01:17:09,687
-No, you didn't.
-Well--

1572
01:17:10,030 --> 01:17:11,880
Try to make it outta here, Captain.

1573
01:17:11,941 --> 01:17:14,272
We'll share a cup of terrible,

1574
01:17:14,272 --> 01:17:16,895
government issued coffee wrapped

1575
01:17:16,895 --> 01:17:19,853
in those scratchy pea green blankets

1576
01:17:19,853 --> 01:17:24,306
while they keep us up for
two or even three days

1577
01:17:24,306 --> 01:17:28,461
at a time interrogating
us about this crazy,

1578
01:17:28,461 --> 01:17:31,610
totally believable adventure.

1579
01:17:31,610 --> 01:17:33,360
You paint a hell of a picture.

1580
01:17:33,360 --> 01:17:35,733
They'll think we're terrorists, criminals.

1581
01:17:35,970 --> 01:17:37,020
Sounds wonderful.

1582
01:17:37,020 --> 01:17:37,853
I know.

1583
01:17:38,607 --> 01:17:40,993
Goodbye, Captain McCloud.

1584
01:17:44,562 --> 01:17:46,600
All right, kiddo, in you go.

1585
01:17:46,808 --> 01:17:51,808
(pensive music)
(water splashing)

1586
01:17:52,708 --> 01:17:55,291
(hatch clangs)

1587
01:18:01,769 --> 01:18:04,686
(machine whirring)

1588
01:18:05,630 --> 01:18:09,853
Okay, ol' buddy, ol'
chum, ol' pal of mine.

1589
01:18:11,360 --> 01:18:14,768
-Looks like it's 50,
(gun cocks)

1590
01:18:14,768 --> 01:18:15,601
50.

1591
01:18:16,230 --> 01:18:17,853
Open your hand, Captain.

1592
01:18:18,500 --> 01:18:20,203
You were going to double cross me.

1593
01:18:20,350 --> 01:18:21,817
How is this a double cross?

1594
01:18:21,817 --> 01:18:23,380
The next pick was you getting

1595
01:18:23,380 --> 01:18:25,293
in that tube and me launching you out.

1596
01:18:25,340 --> 01:18:26,760
Because you would be martyred

1597
01:18:26,760 --> 01:18:28,499
as a war hero who not only saved

1598
01:18:28,499 --> 01:18:30,282
the life of his own men but also

1599
01:18:30,282 --> 01:18:33,035
the life of an enemy who
was only trying to kill him.

1600
01:18:33,035 --> 01:18:36,020
Your name would be
remembered for 1,000 years

1601
01:18:36,020 --> 01:18:37,360
while mine would be a footnote

1602
01:18:37,360 --> 01:18:40,723
in type so small you would
have to be under 30 to read it.

1603
01:18:40,740 --> 01:18:41,573
So,

1604
01:18:45,448 --> 01:18:46,950
you don't wanna go then?

1605
01:18:47,950 --> 01:18:49,353
No, of course not.

1606
01:18:49,503 --> 01:18:51,179
I am going down with my ship.

1607
01:18:51,179 --> 01:18:52,773
It is my destiny.

1608
01:18:53,250 --> 01:18:54,826
I will be remembered as a hero

1609
01:18:54,826 --> 01:18:57,823
if you are alive to tell the story.

1610
01:18:58,020 --> 01:18:59,520
You're somethin' else, Rudy.

1611
01:18:59,671 --> 01:19:00,783
I'll give ya that.

1612
01:19:00,889 --> 01:19:03,722
(water splashing)

1613
01:19:13,640 --> 01:19:16,793
So, this will work then?

1614
01:19:18,450 --> 01:19:23,450
Oh, sure, old buddy, old
chum, old pal of mine.

1615
01:19:23,967 --> 01:19:26,603
We used to do this every
now and then for fun.

1616
01:19:26,603 --> 01:19:29,023
We are not that far down and the water

1617
01:19:29,023 --> 01:19:32,591
is cold but that's about it.

1618
01:19:32,591 --> 01:19:35,550
But after all those jazz cigarettes

1619
01:19:35,550 --> 01:19:37,900
do you think you can hold
your breath, Captain?

1620
01:19:40,900 --> 01:19:44,043
I can hold my breath just
fine, Braunschweiger.

1621
01:19:44,720 --> 01:19:46,244
Don't worry about me.

1622
01:19:46,244 --> 01:19:51,244
(water splashing)
(ship creaking)

1623
01:19:55,999 --> 01:19:58,666
(hatch latches)

1624
01:20:00,117 --> 01:20:03,617
(Captain McCloud tapping)

1625
01:20:08,820 --> 01:20:11,043
Maybe we could send some divers down here.

1626
01:20:11,600 --> 01:20:13,883
Promise me something, Captain McCloud.

1627
01:20:15,041 --> 01:20:17,434
When they rescue you and they take

1628
01:20:17,434 --> 01:20:20,656
you out on the town to
celebrate your triumph,

1629
01:20:20,656 --> 01:20:23,406
I want you to drink a toast to me

1630
01:20:23,711 --> 01:20:28,628
as you waltz down Broadway with
the music of the brass band

1631
01:20:29,128 --> 01:20:31,937
and a dancing girl under
each arm (chuckles).

1632
01:20:39,470 --> 01:20:41,900
-Two bullets left.
(gun clicks)

1633
01:20:41,900 --> 01:20:42,947
Just enough.

1634
01:20:43,465 --> 01:20:44,298
Two?

1635
01:20:44,546 --> 01:20:47,753
In case I miss (chuckles).

1636
01:20:47,753 --> 01:20:48,989
Goodbye, Captain.

1637
01:20:48,989 --> 01:20:49,822
Commander!

1638
01:20:49,822 --> 01:20:54,822
(hatch latching)
(water splashing)

1639
01:21:02,566 --> 01:21:05,483
(machine whirring)

1640
01:21:10,693 --> 01:21:15,693
(pensive music)
(water splashing)

1641
01:21:28,732 --> 01:21:31,482
(fire crackling)

1642
01:21:33,743 --> 01:21:37,410
("I Love You Miss Germany")

1643
01:21:44,070 --> 01:21:49,070
♪ I love you, Miss Germany ♪

1644
01:21:51,220 --> 01:21:56,220
♪ But I leave you for
America, dear today ♪

1645
01:21:58,784 --> 01:22:02,391
♪ Goodbye, dear ♪

1646
01:22:02,391 --> 01:22:06,099
♪ And think of me ♪

1647
01:22:06,099 --> 01:22:11,099
♪ On good behavior I might
be let out of jail someday ♪

1648
01:22:13,769 --> 01:22:18,769
♪ I love you, Miss Germany ♪

1649
01:22:20,929 --> 01:22:25,929
♪ Keep a light out and look
for me, dear and don't dismay ♪

1650
01:22:28,327 --> 01:22:31,616
♪ In a few years we'll
laugh through our tears ♪

1651
01:22:31,616 --> 01:22:34,533
♪ And meet someday ♪

1652
01:23:07,735 --> 01:23:12,735
♪ I love you, Miss Germany ♪

1653
01:23:14,672 --> 01:23:18,670
♪ Keep a light out and look for me, dear ♪

1654
01:23:18,670 --> 01:23:22,137
♪ Don't dismay ♪

1655
01:23:22,137 --> 01:23:25,666
♪ In a few years we'll
laugh through our tears ♪

1656
01:23:25,666 --> 01:23:28,583
♪ And meet someday ♪

1657
01:23:36,587 --> 01:23:39,254
(pensive music)

1658
01:23:58,414 --> 01:24:03,414
(seagulls squawking)
(waves splashing)

1659
01:24:08,213 --> 01:24:10,363
[Captain McCloud] Hard to believe, right?

1660
01:24:11,280 --> 01:24:13,130
I swear on the souls of both Rodgers

1661
01:24:13,130 --> 01:24:17,223
and Hammerstein that all of
it is completely 100% true.

1662
01:24:17,952 --> 01:24:22,952
Funny thing is, UBoat 666 was
never really accounted for.

1663
01:24:25,190 --> 01:24:26,423
I looked it up on Wiki.

1664
01:24:27,410 --> 01:24:29,610
If anybody watching
this is an editor there,

1665
01:24:29,610 --> 01:24:32,063
I'd appreciate getting
an update on your site.

1666
01:24:33,050 --> 01:24:35,423
And make sure you nail two things.

1667
01:24:35,850 --> 01:24:38,720
One, spell Braunschweiger's name properly

1668
01:24:38,720 --> 01:24:41,873
and call the poor son of a bitch Rudy,

1669
01:24:42,470 --> 01:24:46,560
and two, that submarine
is still down there

1670
01:24:46,560 --> 01:24:50,723
in New York Harbor and
that thing, vampire,

1671
01:24:50,880 --> 01:24:54,973
whatever it is, is still
lodged in the rear torpedo bay.

1672
01:24:55,108 --> 01:24:56,388
(Captain McCloud coughs)

1673
01:24:56,388 --> 01:25:00,023
I don't know if it's
dead or in hibernation,

1674
01:25:01,270 --> 01:25:05,370
but if you get down there
someday, bring a sharp stake

1675
01:25:07,460 --> 01:25:12,460
and say hello from Captain Gavin McCloud.

1676
01:25:12,648 --> 01:25:16,398
("I Love You Miss Germany")