You lost weight.
You're just noticing?
Do you know that there are more things
living on your skin than humans on earth?
- No. - Yep.
You excited about today? Hmm?
Did you see our cake?
Hey, nice job.
There's no way you're not going to win.
You mean, you?
We.
Thank you.
Theme?
- Come on. - Oh!
You have got to be fucking kidding me.
Oh, my God, it's nature!
Who has all this time to bake?
Oh, my God, that is so beautiful.
Five, six, seven, eight!
Holy shit.
You won.
Our cake, yeah, it did, I mean, we did, mm-hmm.
- Cool. - Yeah.
- Uh, congratulations. - Thank you.
Okay.
- See you at home. - Yeah, see ya.
- Okay, I love you. - Love you!
Only half a can in the morning. He's on a diet.
I know, you're hungry, but you're getting very fat.
Chicken hearts are his absolute favorite. Are you writing this down?
I'll remember it.
Okay, don't worry, she's going to remember.
Aren't you hot in here? It's very stuffy.
No, don't do that. I don't want him getting out.
You need screens. You want me to have some put in while you're away?
I need curtains. The new neighbors are incredibly annoying.
I mean, what's next? A water slide?
The last people never left the house.
What about you? Are you getting out much?
I'm spending the next six weeks in a meditation retreat.
- That's not getting out enough for you? - I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Ooh, look at the look she's giving me.
How am I looking at you?
You're, like, "So unbearably pathetic since John died" look.
I get that look from Mom and Wally all the time. Oh, speaking of, I forgot.
Yeah, Mom asked me to ask you...
Stop asking me things she asked you to ask me.
You're going to be okay.
Okay.
- Do you want me to just do a ponytail or something? - No.
No, I can do my own hair.
Hey, you guys, when can we do something together?
You know, like, go out to eat or something?
- You don't eat. - I eat.
Okay, well, how about a hike?
- No one can keep up with you. - I have to smoke crack to keep up with you.
Why would you say that? Nobody smokes crack anymore.
- You ready? - Yep.
- You're taking Tara to school? - Mm-hmm.
Oh.
- Bye. - Bye.
- Hug. - Bye.
- Mm! - Mom, Mom, what, what are you... Stop it.
Come on, no interest in sex,
moody as shit, working nonstop?
He started waxing his back.
Frank's fucking around on Gina.
- With a woman who looks 12. - Don't say anything.
Oh, we weren't supposed to say anything.
- She told you how they met, right? - Uh, no.
- Let me see that. - Huh?
What... What are you doing?
- What are you thinking about? - Nothing.
I fought through chemo, surgery, radiation.
I lost a lung, my larynx.
I have no taste or smell.
I thought smoking made me look cool, yeah, look how cool.
Thank you, Todd, thank you so much.
Oh, you know what? Let's thank our entire panel
for sharing their stories with us today.
Thank you, thank you so much.
Again, our cancer surviving...
Is that owner lady gone?
So, what's the deal, are you subletting?
Uh, no, I'm cat-sitting.
I'm surprised she actually left her house, I'm Gemma Jean.
Um, I hate to be that person, but this...
is, um...
it's today, and...
I've been trying to quit.
I've cut back to, like, three cigarettes a day.
Well, I haven't. I smoke at least ten, but that's...
I really need to stop.
I'm pregnant.
- You're pregnant? - Only just.
- You cannot smoke. - I know. I know.
- You should not be smoking. - Mm-hmm.
- Stop it right now. - Trust me, I know, take them,
take them, get them away from me. I don't want them.
I'm done completely, I'm over it.
Thank you, this is exactly what I needed.
Oh, fuck! I left my oven on with the... Oh, fuck!
Shit, bye!
- Hi! - Hey.
So, how was your dance?
Okay.
What, what were you guys talking about?
- What? - You and Helen, what were you guys talking about?
Her name is Ellen.
Ellen?
Well... anyway, I just, um...
I'm happy that you have another adult that you feel comfortable talking with.
I mean, it's just so important, I'm really happy about...
Hello?
I'm dying.
"Try eyeballing or vodka eye dosing?"
What the hell's that?
"Buy an extra-large..." Oh, my God, what?
"And dominate your husband?"
Ooh. I like, "Start a local nudist colony."
- Ew. - I don't want to see nobody naked...
Why don't you spend more time at a food bank, homeless shelter, VA hospital?
No one's whining about a midlife crisis there.
Narcissistic entitlement, that's the real crisis.
I was, uh, waiting to be introduced, but, um...
Hi, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, um,
I wanted to introduce you to our newest Angel Committee member, this is Mary.
- Mary Kenley. - Hi, Mary.
Yeah, I, um... So...
how's this work? I mean, what are we doing here? Who's in charge?
Holla at your girl.
Fuck.
I don't know.
I'll figure it out.
Cat! Hi, are you okay?
- Yeah, are you? - Oh, God, I'm having the worst...
I, I woke up this morning with, um, uh... I was, like,
bleeding and cramping and vomiting and diarrhea,
you name it. And Len, my sweetheart,
was supposed to drive me to the hospital, but that stupid, fucking car broke down,
and my ex-husband insists on taking me, but he doesn't know about...
I can't see anything.
What do you mean? I took a pregnancy test.
Your bleeding's your period, you're not...
- Well, it was positive. - False positive.
Perhaps a chemical pregnancy.
You know, skipping your period isn't uncommon at your age.
Prior to menopause, peri-menopause, women-opause,
it seems fair to say, right?
You may experience very erratic cycles, mood changes,
sleep disturbance, dry skin, weight gain,
extreme breast tenderness, or, uh, loss of breast fullness,
incontinence, vaginal dryness...
- Oh, my God. - Hey, don't focus on the sun going down.
Ah, the night's still young.
Mm, I ordered them extra bloody, appropriately.
It's the middle of the day.
Bloody Mary's aren't daytime?
This, um, committee that you're so obsessed with,
what does it have to do with angels?
We're volunteers. You should come to a meeting with me, we...
And you do this why?
For the school.
- You know, if I don't do it, then... - Oh, someone else will.
Oh!
Cat, this is Len.
Len, Cat.
- Cathy. - Notice me not smoking right now?
You can thank Cat.
Ah.
Hey!
Sounds like your mom's going all out for Thanksgiving, huh?
Should be fun seeing your cousins.
I mean, we could be making so much money that way.
- Yes, yes. - Yeah.
Let's create posters.
Buttons, mugs, calendars.
Anything you can print out, we can do.
Anyone else have any ideas, about how we could do...
I mean, what do you think about... I mean, the sky's the limit with...
- Yeah. - Oh.
Hi.
what's going on?
We, we voted last week to start meetings
a half hour earlier, an email was sent out confirming.
- I don't think she was here last week. - Mm-mm, she wasn't.
Oh, well, remind me to give you a copy of last week's minutes, uh, Jane.
It's Cathy.
Oh.
So, there's a rat in there, and you're sure it's in there?
Mm-hmm. Just shove it over there before the thing skitters out.
Oh, my gosh!
- Done. - Push it!
With all of your energy, you should be,
like, running the country
or at least your own business or something like that.
- Well, you know, I did for years. - Mm, and?
I had Tara.
How convenient, what's the real reason?
That's the real reason.
No, it isn't, just be honest.
I am being honest.
I know you.
Ah, you really don't.
I am you.
You need perspective.
- No. - Do it.
Okay.
- Ooh! - Oh, what...
What is in this? I shouldn't have done this.
- Here, scoot up. - Oh.
What am I... Is this a body suit? Is this the whole thing connected?
- Yeah. - Why would you wear something like this?
Cat, this is my baby.
- Hello. - Xander, say hello.
- You're drinking? - It's juice.
Just...
Don't, come on.
Mm, juice, right.
What's in the bucket?
Just ignore the bucket.
- No, no, no, no, no, no, Xander, don't! - No, no.
So, this was them, that's love.
So lucky.
- He died. - Well, mine's alive and won't leave.
Are you together, are you separated or divorced?
Maybe we would be if it wasn't such a hassle.
Are you, divorced?
No.
Well, you know what they say.
Marriage is for men, divorce is for women.
- They say that? - Yeah, hold on. All of this for one cat?
Well, where does Len fit in to all of that?
Oh, she doesn't, which, um, you know, works out perfectly for us.
Oh, she's having a party tomorrow night. You should come with me.
Oh, we leave for Thanksgiving break tomorrow.
- Give thanks for that. - Ha, yeah.
Okay.
Just leave out a bunch of food and water, it'll be fine.
Gail would kill me.
Yeah.
You know what? I probably should see a doctor. Damn.
You guys just go and I'll meet you there as soon as I get this all figured out.
- Muah! - Bye.
Love you. Bye, hun.
Call me when you land.
God, I would kill for a girl.
A son's a son until he takes a wife.
A daughter's a daughter her entire life.
My son stopped talking to me when his voice changed.
It's so sad.
Yeah.
His voice before, everything before.
It was like I dreamt it.
- How's your hand? - Throbbing.
Oof.
Oh, here.
These are for my back, they're great.
Just take half, see how you feel.
Where's your bedroom, hmm?
I want a tour of the whole house.
It's, um, down the hall from Tara's room.
These are handmade.
Yeah, that's what I did for years.
Well, why did you stop?
I, um, I saved the most important ones for my daughter.
This is exquisite.
Well, I can't take it off.
I can't.
I promise I'll be really careful with it.
It's fine, it's like a fun party.
Fuck!
Gemma Jean, wait!
You're going to just leave me here? What the fuck?
Gemma Jean!
Gemma Jean's in the hospital, there's been an accident.
- What? - Injuries were minor, mostly from the airbag.
- You need to go right away, I... - You're okay staying here with Xander?
Of course, yes, go, go, you need to go.
I'll be back soon. Thank you.
You're awake?
- I'm so sorry, your mom is... - I heard.
Well, she's okay.
Your dad is going to be right back.
- Are you okay? - You can go.
You shouldn't be alone.
Yes, I should.
- Well, your dad asked me to stay... - You seem like a normal person.
What are you doing with my mom?
She gave you those.
- No. - How many have you had?
No, she left them at my house.
Yeah, just be careful with them.
Well, they're for my hand.
You're that lady, aren't you? From the assembly, with that group.
I am, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Anyway, you can go.
You should stay away from my mom, for sure.
And go home before those pills kick in.
Oh, watch your step, all right.
Oh, you're a great big boyfriend, yeah, you sure are.
Oh. Oh, oh!
Kitty? Fuck! Oh!
Why!
Hello?
Hello.
Oh, ah, hi, um, Paul Rhodes...
from, uh, last night.
Just give me a second.
Sorry, your door was wide open.
What?
Your door, it was open.
Oh, uh, I must have left, must have left it open, in case the cat came back.
Um, well, I was... I, um, Gemma Jean, she said this was yours.
Let's put it down here.
I, I can't thank you enough for, for everything, so.
No, you kidding me?
After the insanity that Gemma Jean put you through?
Well, you know, I got myself in that situation, so.
I'm afraid to ask what happened with Xander. I mean, he can just be totally...
No, he's fine, it's fine.
- Um, anyway. - Yeah.
I'll, uh, see you later.
- Okay. - Thank you.
All right.
I forgot you gave this to me to hold.
- Oh. - Oh, I never asked, what happened?
- Oh. - Oh.
- Um. - Does it hurt?
I probably have some ointment too. I don't know if...
Yeah, ointment.
It's, uh, probably going to get infected.
Yep, probably will.
Mm.
Is that okay?
- I don't know. - Yeah, it is.
What else...
what else do you fantasize about?
Singing like Stevie Nicks.
Aw, that's cute.
So kid-like, I love that.
I wish mine were that innocent.
Why, what are yours?
You don't want to know.
They're very violent, actually.
Hmm.
And sexual.
Sexually violent.
Oh, shit.
I don't know why I just told you that, I'm so sorry. I...
- You are really beautiful. - Hmm.
I would never actually mutilate anyone,
or anything, they're just...
they're not real.
- I've never done this. - What, never?
What are you doing?
Where you going?
Oh, fuck.
Oh, fuck. Fuck.
Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!
Oh, where was he? Oh, here. Here's a reward.
Is this for the cat or for keeping my mouth shut?
What?
You guys weren't exactly discreet.
- What are you talking about? - You know what I'm talking about.
Did you know cats can predict earthquakes?
Have you read Making Rounds with Oscar:
The Extraordinary Gift of an Ordinary Cat?
It's... this nursing home adopted a cat to,
you know, comfort all of the old people,
but it turned out that he was really shy,
and he wouldn't interact with people,
unless they were right about to die,
and then he just appears in their room.
And is all, like, affectionate and starts purring and stuff.
It's so creepy.
So cool. Amazing read.
Anyway, an iPad would be good. You know, in exchange.
In exchange for what?
I think you know.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
No, no, no, no, no.
I told you, I don't know.
It was alive when I put it in the thing. It just, it seemed weak.
Mm, you didn't do anything to it?
No. Why would you even ask me that?
No, it probably ate some of the rat poison Mom had me put everywhere.
And what's this crap about an iPad?
- Say you're sorry. - For what?
- Say you're sorry! - It's okay.
No, it's not. Say it.
- I'm sorry. - Good, now dig.
- Dig! - Ah!
She asked me to go with her.
- To rehab? - Yeah.
It's couples' rehab.
It's the first time that she's ever really wanted to try.
I never thought she would ever want to.
And, look, it's probably pointless.
I'm nuts, right?
And right now, like, everything with us,
- it's just, the timing is terrible. - Hey, hey, I'm married.
- Fully married? Or... - Paul...
go work on your relationship, all right?
Wouldn't that be great? Especially for Xander.
Yeah.
All right.
Um...
my parents are going to be staying here with him, and they're kind of out of it,
so if you could just keep an eye out on him while you're here,
so he doesn't burn the house down or anything.
Sure, I'll check on him. Make sure he's okay.
Thank you.
- That means so much to me. - Yeah.
- Thank you so much. - Don't, don't. Don't, don't.
All right.
What happened?
Oh, well...
Is she okay?
Oh, let me talk to her, let me talk to her. I just want to tell...
Well... Well, can you just put the phone up to her ear and I'll...
Well, because I'm her mother.
How was the flight? You thirsty? You're probably hungry.
Yeah, I got it, I got it, I got it.
Um, you guys, you want a snack?
You want a snack? Hey, you know what?
What?
I am so sorry I wasn't there.
Yeah, it's no big deal.
It is a very big deal. I'm sorry, tell me what happened.
Nothing happened.
Please?
I didn't even know I was bleeding.
I stood up and everybody's freaking out
because I stained the white couch, Grandma's white couch.
Dad couldn't deal, so Aunt Laura had to drive me
to get pads and told the entire world in Walmart.
Where's your suitcase?
You want it to trickle, not gush.
'Cause the more it gushes, the more you will gush.
- Of water? - No, blood.
That's what my mom told me.
She called it "The Scarlet Stranger."
No wonder you hate her.
- I don't hate her. - Well, she lives, like, five minutes away,
and you never see her.
Well, yeah, but I don't hate her.
What do you like about her, then?
Well, she collects things.
Like feathers and fans, tin boxes.
Um, oh, she loved cooking shows, and, like...
Well, I didn't ask what she liked.
Yeah, you did.
Forget it.
I'm sorry, what was the question?
Is it okay if I go to Leeann's?
Yeah.
You eat these?
They're delicious.
How long has it been since you've washed your hair?
I don't know.
Just a trim, right?
Yeah.
- What's that? - It's nothing.
Hey.
How'd you know my size?
Lucky guess. Well, you look great. How do you feel?
- Decent. - Okay.
Oh, what do you think of the, uh, ginger wheat grass shot I gave you?
You know, you take one of these a day
with a little apple cider vinegar, you'll be young forever.
Why would I want to be young forever?
What's the alternative?
Growing up.
Did my dad pay you to do all this?
No, nobody's paying me.
You bought me a ton of stuff.
I wanted to.
Why?
- Thanks. - Yeah.
Why aren't you eating?
Why aren't you in any activities?
Do you like sports? Or...
I've seen you writing.
- What kind of stuff do you like to write? - I don't know.
I'm being nosy.
I'm sorry.
What do you do? Are you, are you a hairdresser?
No.
Okay, a what? For real, I'm asking.
Are you a chef or a teacher? Or something?
- No. - No?
So, you're just, you're good at everything, then?
And great at nothing.
- Hi! - Hey!
- How are you? - Hi! Ooh.
- Yay! They made that whole thing up. - Yeah, really? Huh.
I got to get her involved in something other than dance.
- It's fun, it's exercise. - What is the point of doing it,
if she's never going to be great?
She should at least pursue something
that she has a chance at.
She's not interested in anything I do.
- I wish you played a sport, because then maybe she would... - Oh, so, if I played a sport,
that would just change everything.
Did I say that?
Just say what you mean.
Stop being so aggressively passive aggressive.
Well, why do you think that is?
I don't know. Why don't you just speak your fucking mind?
- Hello? - Oh, Cathy.
Xander's not picking up. I had nobody else to call.
Where are you going?
I don't know whose idea it was to put a bunch of fucked up couples together for four weeks,
but that person should be shot.
Whatever this is, it's not working.
I can barely look at Paul.
The man has nothing to say, and they refuse to give me any decent fucking painkillers.
I'm being tortured.
But I'm in so much fucking pain right now.
Do they have visiting hours? 'Cause, you know... I... Maybe I could drive Xander...
Oh, he doesn't want to come. He doesn't want to come.
He won't even answer my phone calls.
Why would he come visit me?
Now, don't say that.
No, he does not care that I'm gone.
Can you leave, please?
I hate rehab.
How many have you been to?
I bet you've never even been to one.
You might want to hide these.
They'll get confiscated.
Wait.
- What? - I change my mind.
- Why? - Look, I just don't want to go, okay?
Okay.
Hey, we won't go.
Hey, I got a better idea.
Where are we?
Get this part over with first.
Come on! I'm three times older than you.
Is that true?
Oh, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on.
I'll go if you stop doing that.
I'm going!
You okay? Okay?
- Yeah. - You okay?
- Up, up, up! - Jesus.
Let's go.
So, you've never been on that hike before?
- Nope. - God, you live so close.
I used to take my daughter all the time.
- hmm, you have a daughter? - Yeah.
Yeah, she goes to Lincoln too.
- She does? - Mm-hmm.
- What grade? - Seventh.
Well, why aren't you with her?
She's out with her friends, which is good.
It's where you should be too.
I am.
- This was fun. - Mm.
I got to go.
You don't want to come in for a little bit?
No, I, I've really got to go.
What about our jumbo buns?
- I didn't order that. - Yeah, sure.
No, I didn't.
You totally did.
Okay, Xander, you, you got to go now. You must be so sick of me.
- Now. - The opposite.
- Oh, what are you doing? - There's no napkins left.
- I have to use your shirt as a napkin. - All right.
Stop it, stop it, okay.
You smell so good.
- That's the jumbo bun. - Mm-hmm.
- All right. - Mm-hmm.
Stop. Get out. Get out!
So, it's okay for my dad, just not for me?
Both are wrong.
Get out of my car.
Fuck.
- Hello! - Gail.
Wow. Wow.
How was the retreat?
Life changing, I see.
- Yeah. - Oh, God.
The house looks so... What is all this?
I know it was probably really hard for you
to live with all this stuff,
and so I just took it all, I put it in boxes.
- I took it all, and I put it... - You got this,
you got this all out of my closet.
Yeah.
But this is all John.
Yes, it is all here in these boxes.
I didn't throw anything out. It's all here.
That was completely unacceptable that you did that.
Completely wrong. You are completely weird.
You thought wrong.
You just thought really, really wrong. I can't believe you did this.
Where's Floyd?
Where's my little mister?
Floyd?
John always told me not to trust you!
I always told him he was wrong. I always stuck up for you.
That was my mess, my life, my cat!
And you, you just had to box it all up?
- I... - I...
No wonder, no wonder you can't deal with Mom.
She's you or you're her.
Only you're worse!
Boo!
- Oh, you were really scared. - Yes!
I got you. What?
What?
- Get the... What is wrong with you? - Geez.
- Jesus. - I'm just trying to teach you a lesson.
You never, ever, never, ever, never leave your car unlocked. You never know.
Are you insane?
Oh, no. No, no, no. I didn't mean to...
I'm sorry, I came here to give you this.
Now, I'm scared that you're not actually going to read it,
so maybe, maybe if I read it to you.
It'd be more real that way too. It's a poem that I wrote.
Um, can I?
- Yeah? Okay. - Sure.
Ready? So, here we go.
"Here is the deepest secret nobody knows.
Here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud..."
- You wrote this? - Yeah.
- "And the sky of the sky..." - "Of the sky."
...of a tree called Life,
- which grows..." - "I carry your heart.
I carry it in my heart"?
- You didn't write this. - I did.
Oh, you're E.E. Cummings?
It felt like I wrote it.
That's what I meant.
- Yes. - Can you meet me?
Can you bring me the pills I gave you?
Meet me on Sixth and Marina.
So, how high was the fence?
It was fucking high. I don't know.
- And how'd you get over it? - Desperation.
My back is killing me.
But how far did you walk?
I just, I really need something for my back right now.
And to help me sleep. I haven't slept at all.
Well, what are you allowed? I mean, probably not any of this over the counter stuff.
Where are my painkillers?
I gave them to you. You said you would bring them.
- I did? - You did. You absolutely did.
- I don't have them. - Yes, you do.
No, I don't.
Fuck. Just drive me back.
Just drive me back!
Now, I have to sneak back in and convince everybody that I never left.
- You're not getting over that. - Yeah, I am, you're going to help me.
Are you kidding me?
What are you doing? You know you're not supposed to do that!
Yeah, well, I just fucking did.
Do I never shut up because they won't speak?
Or is it they don't speak because I never shut up?
You know, I'm sure my daughter talks.
All the time. She must.
Wait, your daughter?
Yeah.
Here. Here, do a... you know.
Fuck.
I was 15, Xander's age, when I had her.
My mom signed the surrender papers. She never told me she did that.
They promised they were going to bring her right back after, but...
I got to hold her in my arms for a few minutes, though.
I thought they were going to bring her right back.
- Paul doesn't know. - Maybe now's a good time to tell him.
He doesn't talk. We've been over this.
I'm sorry, I just...
- Ow! - Oh!
- Are you okay? - Just throw me the NyQuil.
That drug coupled with the staph infection caused that reaction.
What drug?
- Thank you. - You don't have to thank me.
You missed a lot of work.
I used vacation days.
Yeah, but this wasn't a vacation.
But it should have been.
I mean, when was the last time that we went out, just us,
alone together?
We need a real date.
I'd love that.
Ooh, no, stay in bed.
Have a great day.
Hi.
Uh, I'm just here to get Tara.
Uh, I know she's probably going to want to stay,
- but I need her to come home. - Tara's not here.
- Oh, Matthew said she was here. - Don't you know?
- Know what? - Tara and Leeann stopped speaking.
Leeann!
Sweetheart.
Come here. Tell her.
- Mom. - What, what did she say?
- Okay, well, do you know where she is? - Isn't that your job, Cathy?
So, like, we worked on our dance.
And?
We played Monopoly.
You played a board game?
Mm-hmm.
With Leeann?
What do I always say?
If you're honest with me, you won't get in trouble.
Are you being honest with me?
Where were you?
I was at the bluffs.
How did you get there?
We walked.
- Who's we? - Just some kids from school.
What kids from school?
A bunch of people.
You just all of a sudden met a bunch of kids from school?
- Can you explain that? - I don't know.
I mean, like, first I met this one guy at lunch,
and he introduced me to everybody else.
Do you like him?
I mean, is he cute? Tell me about him.
I mean, he's really smart and funny.
And he just moved here last summer.
Can I meet him? What's he like?
- Fuck. - Jesus.
Where you been, lady?
I mean, you just left me with those crazy people.
Take one.
Speak. Say something.
Oh, uh, gosh, there's, there's just so many things.
You're not telling me.
You're not calling, you're not texting me back.
Oh, my God, are you getting a divorce?
- I'm Catherine. - Hi.
- Matthew Tyne's wife. - Oh, he's not back from lunch yet.
He usually gets back around two-ish.
It's 12:30 now? He takes that long of a lunch?
I could call his cell phone.
Well, do you want me to leave him a message?
Uh, no. I'm perfectly capable, thank you.
Hello?
Tara. What's blocking the door?
One second.
Come on, open the door!
- Open the door! - Hi.
You having a party? Who's in there?
Uh, this is Xander.
Xander, this is my mom.
Nice to meet you.
Xander walked me home since you said I wasn't allowed to go to the bluffs.
Can I talk to you for a second, just...
Well, why can't we just do it here?
Just real quick, okay.
Why was your door locked?
It wasn't. My knapsack was blocking it.
- What were you doing in there? - We were just talking.
Hmm.
You got to get him out of here.
Why?
He is, he is much older than you, Tara.
Okay. Dad is six years older than you.
What happened with Leeann? Why are you two not talking anymore?
We're just different.
Like, she's still into dolls and arts and crafts and stuff.
- And I'm just not. - You're not?
All of a sudden, you're not?
- What are you doing? - Nothing.
You said you wanted to meet him, and he was totally in to it.
So, I'm going to pee.
- Hi. Hey. - Hey.
- Oh. - Hi.
Hello.
Dad, uh, this is Xander.
Xander, this is my dad.
Oh, well, uh, is he tutoring you?
No, we're friends.
Friends.
Yeah, from school.
Uh, isn't it getting late?
Yeah, it is. Absolutely.
Sorry, I didn't even realize how... What time is it?
Yeah, I didn't even realize how late it was.
I, uh, I actually, I do have to go.
- Um, so I'll see you later. - Yeah, okay.
It was nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too, Cathy. - Yeah.
Bye.
Why the hell is he still in middle school?
He was held back in kindergarten because of his speech impediment.
And then again, I think, in first grade for, like, some motor skill issues.
How do you know all this?
How well does she know this guy?
- And, and you're allowing this? - No.
Then why is he in our house?
He is not allowed in this house!
- Why? - Because you're not old enough for boys.
Especially boys who shave and are easy to imagine with a semi-automatic.
- Are you insane? - If I catch you with this guy again,
trust me, there will be major consequences.
- Are you with me? - Yeah, yeah.
Are you kidding me?
Look, since when do you even care. No!
It's none of your business what I do.
It is entirely my business.
- Hypocrites. - Why don't you go look that word up, Tara?
You don't even know what that means.
Okay. "A person who pretends to have virtues, moral, or religious beliefs.
Principals that he or she does not actually possess.
- Especi..." - Give me that. Give me that. Give, drop it.
Drop it.
You're still up?
You have time, Tara.
Really?
Because there's actually enough nuclear weapons
to wipe out every major city in the world.
And only idiots in charge of them.
Oh, yeah, Cathy, tons of time.
Hi.
So, your parents are back.
Yep, they sure are.
How's your mom, she okay?
Better than ever. They're all in love again.
Aw, that's great.
I give it a week.
So, you know why I wanted to talk to you, right?
You know why.
What are you doing with my daughter?
I hadn't seen you in a while, so I was curious.
She's different. She's not at all what I imagined.
You're prettier than she is. I think that's hard on her.
Um, she says you're depressed, which is interesting.
That's not my experience of you at all.
Anyway, she's really cool.
We've had some intense conversations.
Xander...
Tara is too young.
And I'm asking you to please stay away from her.
Or what?
Uh...
what if I buy you that iPad? The one you wanted?
Then what? What, what can I do?
I don't want an iPad.
However, I would do whatever you wanted if...
- If what? - No one knows this.
Don't laugh.
I'm still a virgin.
Well, there's nothing wrong with that. That's a good thing.
Now, I understand why you might say no to this idea,
but I, I swear no one would ever find out,
and I promise you I will never even look at Tara again.
I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that.
But just think about it.
I'm sure you don't want Tara finding out about you and me,
about you and my dad.
And I'm sure the last thing you probably want is,
is your husband finding out, or just, like, people finding out.
You need to get out of my car right now.
- Please don't be mad. - Xander...
I... No, no, no. I hate, I hate you feeling bad.
I hate you feeling bad. I really love you.
I do. If, if you want, I promise, I'll, I'll never talk to Tara again.
I'll stay away from her completely.
- What about these intense conversations? - I'll tell you...
- What is she telling you? - I'll tell you. I'm sorry.
I should've told you from the beginning. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry.
Shit.
- What just happened? - Nothing, nothing.
Just, just give me a minute.
So, what's been...
so, what's Tara been telling you?
There was a boyfriend last summer at sleepaway camp.
A boyfriend? She never mentioned a boyfriend. Who, who?
Leo? Liam? Leo, Liam? One of them.
Something like that. Anyway, they went to second base.
What does that even mean anymore?
Well, I assumed it was just...
Uh, second base was all she said.
And I think she was just trying to impress me.
Oh, you think she was just saying that? Like, maybe it really didn't happen?
No, I think it's true and it happened, and she wanted it to impress me.
And it did. Impress me, I mean. You know, I've never even...
Did she say anything about any other boys?
Was she molested or something, or?
She didn't mention getting molested.
But, um...
Can we... Are you... thinking about it?
Okay, Xander, Xander.
There are professionals.
Maybe talk to your dad. He can take you to a...
Are you suggesting that I lose my virginity to a prostitute?
And that my dad should pay for it?
Are you out of your fucking mind?
I don't want a whore, I want you!
What's on your lips?
- Nothing. - Is that lipstick?
It's chap stick.
Take it off.
She was marked absent.
Can you check again?
Jesus. How the fuck is this happening?
- Huh? - I don't know!
Hey, guys! Hey, I'm, uh, looking for my daughter.
All right, all right.
Okay, continue, thank you.
They didn't know.
I'm sorry.
You're sorry? For what?
I feel like we've both kind of been...
What?
I know.
You know? What do... what do you know?
Just say it! Just say it.
- Say what? - The truth!
What, quit with this cryptic shit!
Don't lay it on me right now.
Oh, you know what? You are the one who...
My daughter is missing!
And why do you think that is?
This is my fault? Fuck this!
- Fuck you! I'm out of here! - Fuck you!
Get out of the way, get out!
I'm not getting out of the way!
Get out of the way!
- Get out of the way! - Wow.
- Fuck you! - Fuck you!
Thank God. Thank God.
You know the whole world is out looking for you?
Why weren't you answering your phone?
Because your husband took my phone away.
How long have you been here?
Where were you? Why weren't you at school?
- I was. - You're lying.
I was there all morning. I only missed P.E. and library.
- Where did you go? - The movies.
- With who? - Friends.
- Xander? - I was with a group of people.
Was Xander one of them?
- What are you going to do to me if he was? - So, he was.
I don't know.
Stop lying!
- Why are you doing this? - I'm not doing anything!
Please just leave me alone.
Get out of my room!
- Get out of my room! - She's home.
Why are you calling Dad?
Are you serious, you're calling dad? Why?
Why can't you ever just leave me alone
for one second in my life?
Please just go!
I hate you so much and I hope you know that.
I scared you. I'm sorry.
I saw you come in and I wanted to say hi.
Paul and Xander are getting seats.
- So, you've been good? You look great. - Thank you.
I'm good.
But, you know, sometimes, there's, uh...
there's like this, uh, fast forward feeling I get.
Does that ever happen to you? Do you get that?
It's been nonstop therapy.
Paul and I.
He's talking.
Finally.
He told me.
So, I know.
About, you know, things between the two of you.
- It wasn't... - Oh, no. I get it, I get it.
We were separated at the time, so it's not...
well, it might be for you.
Does your husband know?
Oh.
Of course.
It's probably best that he doesn't.
It would only hurt him to know.
I really have to remember not to mention that.
It could be really damaging.
Xander's also opened up a lot.
Yeah, he started reading us his poems
and his short stories, stuff from his journal.
Mostly his hateful feelings toward me and his father, but we encourage it.
He's written quite a lot about you too.
I just want you to know... how grateful
I am that you were there for him when we weren't.
Nobody else noticed he needed new sneakers.
He said he'd never felt more taken care of in his whole life.
And with Tara. He's like a different kid with her.
They're great together, don't you think?
Does Tara talk about Xander to you too?
I know they talk and text but those texts disappear.
So...
we can't really know what's going on.
If she were mine...
I hope you know how lucky you are.
What?
Wait, wait, wait.
What do you have to do today?
School.
You want to do something fun instead?
Oh, what are you, what are you talking about?
- I got to... - Wait, you and me... No.
Shut the door, shut the door.
What, what are you doing right now?
We never do anything spontaneous, mother-daughter.
You know, we used to do stuff before middle school.
- Remember? - Oh, my God.
So, what about this? What about, um,
you tell me a, a Tara thing, every day. Just any random thing.
Like, right now, what are you thinking about?
I don't know.
Just, what are you thinking about right now?
- Right this second? - Yes.
Um, that you're kind of freaking me out.
Well, you know what I'm thinking about?
You and me going to Disneyland.
- Oh, oh, we're going to Disneyland? - We could, we could.
Or not. We don't have to.
Uh, uh, we could go on a bike ride or a hike? Yeah?
Anything you want to do! Just name it. Um, mani-pedi's?
- Uh, a massage? - A massage?
Yeah! A foot massage? You'd love it.
- But... - Yes!
- Yes? - If you say so.
Okay, good!
- Ow. Um, doesn't open for, like, another hour. - Oh.
hmm.
I have a test third period anyway, so.
Okay, well, you know who lives nearby?
You know... I don't...
Mom, you don't just stop by somebody's house unannounced.
And you hate it when people do that.
Well, I thought it would be fun.
You thought this would be fun?
I thought anything we did together would be fun.
Okay, well, that's the problem. You don't think about having fun, it just happens.
You know, you're right. It is rude to just show up unannounced.
I hate it when people do it to me,
and I'm not going to do it now.
Hello?
- I'm going to leave a note. - Really?
- Did, did you just hang up on your mother? - No, no.
Here, turn around.
Okay.
Thank you for doing this with me.
I'm not going to lie, it was kind of weird.
It was weird. Now, go, go, go, go, go, go.
Next time, huh?
Have a good day.
No, don't come over here.
Oh, God, I don't want to talk to you. Please don't.
- Oh, hi. - Hey.
So, um... I rescued a cat.
- Oh, what else is new? - Yeah.
Um, yeah, and I had no clue she was pregnant,
and there are five more in the back.
There were six, but Tyler, um, never mind.
Um, they're cute, right?
Surprise.
Hmm?
- I brought someone to... - Not outside.
Jesus Christ, you want to kill that one too?
See?
You think this is going to make it all better?
- I thought that she might... - Make up for Floyd?
It makes up for nothing.
You don't replace pets with other pets,
people with other people.
- At least I don't. - I don't.
I can't replace you... or Mom.
Have you talked to her?
- Who? - Mom.
- Did she, um, I thought she might have mentioned... - Your note?
Yeah, I just wondered if she'd said anything about...
So, you just came here to ask me
to ask her...
something for you?
Mm. Well, it's been over a decade.
And now suddenly it's convenient for you. You know, what took you so long?
Unbelievable.
Wait, wait, wait!
Put that kitten away safely, in there.
Is it a girl? That's why you got a pink one, or do you even know?
- I didn't look! - Okay, fine.
You got a blue collar, you got a pink case.
- It's a girl. - Fine.
Get her a pink collar.
I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry.
She did call me about you.
She called me in tears.
The second she got your note.
I heard two sentences from you and I thought her heart would explode.
You're all she talked about. You're all she ever talked about.
Well, you know, I'm just not ready to love anything.
Just take... it back to your fucking fairy tale.
Cathy.
You know Xander and, uh, apparently,
you've already met Gemma Jean and Paul?
I guess they're Gail's neighbors?
- Why didn't you mention that? - I did.
Oh, when we met, it was so brief. Very quickly.
Yeah, we barely, uh... we did, uh, we did help bury the cat.
- But... - Yes.
Thank you for that. Oh.
I was just at Gail's, actually, and I, uh, tried to give her this.
Oh, my God!
Oh, is it a he or a she?
Oh.
Oh, he's so little.
You know that cat people are 25% more likely to choose George as their favorite Beatle?
Oh.
- Can I speak with you? - Yeah.
- You're not serious. - Why are those people in my house?
I didn't know what else to do. I can't have my daughter hating me.
If we forbid it, we're playing into it,
so I thought, do the opposite, right? Invite them over.
As far as I'm concerned, this kid is my new best friend. All right?
We're going to kill it with kindness. hmm?
And you know what? Uh, he seems really harmless, he's kind of geeky.
And I like the dad. He invited me to the Kings game.
Hey! I'm back!
I am willing to negotiate with you.
- But you got to give me a guarantee. - What?
You have to promise me.
Wait, what are you talking about?
That you will never see Tara again.
I don't want you looking in her direction.
I want this to be over.
I can't.
- Why can't you? - It's too late.
I don't need anything from you anymore.
What are you talking about?
I'm good.
I'm happy. Tara's happy. We're happy.
Let's just leave it at that.
Listen...
I know this might be hard for you to hear,
and... I'm sorry.
I don't think I love you anymore.
I am falling pretty hard for your daughter, though.
- Which is better for both of us, really. - Why, why is that better?
What Tara and I have, it's just...
- Okay. What do you have? - Is totally different from us.
What do you have?
That's private.
Are you jealous?
Look, it's not like I don't still have feelings for you too.
Wait!
Oh, my God. I fucking got you.
Oh, you see over there with the, uh... at the tree, it looks like it's a cliff,
and that you're totally going off the cliff, but it's not. It's completely flat.
It freaks the shit out of people.
What?
Stay away from me and my daughter.
- Oh, my God. - What happened?
- You hit a mom, dick hole. - Shit!
- Don't touch me. - Maybe, maybe we should take you to the hospital.
Maybe I should call the cops.
- Jesus. - Stop it.
- Let's get out of here. - Yeah, let's go.
- Are you okay to drive? - I'm fine.
You sure?
I do fucked up things sometimes, I do. I do them.
It's, it's really, it's like an attention thing, combined with what I'm sure is,
like, a testosterone thing and just...
You were so nice to me.
And then you just, you, you vanished.
What, what do you want? Do you want me to never talk to Tara ever again?
Because I won't. I will swear it on my life.
Especially if it means that much to you,
and I think you really need to go to the hospital.
- That car, it really... - Yeah, you know what? You know, no, no.
Just...
So, what are you going to say?
How are you going to end it? What's your plan?
- I'll do whatever you want me to do. - Okay.
I want you to say that the age difference was... too great
and, uh, things got intense too fast and,
and, you know, you want to take a break.
I think that's all true.
It's not true.
But I'll say it if you want me to.
Say that.
Say exactly that.
Breathe. Slow. Get that back straight. There it is.
- Suck that stomach in. - It's hard to suck your stomach in.
That's my wife.
- Hey, there. I'm Maya. - Cathy.
- You know, he's kicking some serious ass over here. - Give us two minutes.
- Two minutes. - Okay.
What are you doing here?
That's my question.
What I'm doing? Isn't it obvious?
I mean... why wouldn't you tell me?
Because I thought you'd laugh at me.
Yeah.
Yeah, look, and you're laughing.
You, you have not one nice thing to say to me ever.
That is not true.
It is, it's true.
And anything that you say that's remotely nice,
it comes out of your mouth like you don't even mean it.
What are you talking about?
A few months ago, I get a complimentary training session.
I come in here and I meet Maya, all right?
And we're training, and she said something... about my face.
That she thinks it's great and that my eyes
are amazing or some shit like that.
And you know what happened? I blushed.
I felt blood move inside me,
which is a feeling that I haven't had in a fucking long time.
Because I don't get compliments.
From anyone, anywhere, about anything.
And this... person,
this stranger is kind to me.
And, yeah, I pay her, and maybe it's...
this is just bullshit, but it feels real.
Okay?
Wait, no, where, where are you going?
I'm sorry.
You didn't eat dinner, so is there something I can bring you?
You're not hot.
- Mm, that's the problem. - Stop it.
You don't have a fever.
Please don't make me go to school tomorrow.
I don't want to see him.
Why, what happened?
I don't even remember.
Like, it was honestly just so incredibly humiliating.
- Why? - Because, apparently,
I'm too young to have feelings or something.
Did he say that?
You've all said it.
Maybe because you need to focus on other things besides having a boyfriend.
Like what?
Like who you are, what your interests are,
what do you want to be when you grow up?
Well, what did you want to be?
A lot of things.
Then who are you?
I am a lot of things.
Like, what exactly?
Well, I'm your mom, mostly.
Yeah, well, what about the other stuff?
Well, you know, there's no guarantee that you're
ever going to get to do any of the other stuff.
You know? There's no guarantee you're going to get to do anything you want to do.
So, instead of figuring out who I am by having fun
and being young and having a boyfriend,
I should spend my time figuring out who I am by figuring out who I want to be?
Like, even though it's doubtful, I'll get to be that?
Well, I didn't say doubtful...
- Yes, you did. - ...I just said there's no guarantee.
Most people just turn out like their parents, right?
Yeah, yeah, I guess. Just statistically that's true.
So, then, most likely, I'll turn out like you.
A mom, mostly, who doesn't talk to her mom.
In my case, the mom I'm not talking to would be you,
and the mom my kids not talking to would be me,
making the future me wish I didn't waste my young life
not having fun, not having a boyfriend,
so that I could spend my time figuring out
the thing I wanted to be that I never was?
- What? - Is there something you want to tell me?
No.
You sure?
What are these?
It's not, what is that?
So sneaky.
I'm sorry.
Only one left.
Come on.
Smoke it.
Please?
I want to watch.
How good is it?
How long has this been going on?
This has to be my last one.
What else are you hiding from me?
No.
I want to imagine.
Something, uh, postmodern?
Maybe miscellaneous.
Okay, looks interesting.