0000 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:10,000 YoubetCash.net Agen Judi Online Aman & Terpercaya 000 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:15,000 Bonus Cashback Bola 6% Bonus Rollingan 0,80% 00 00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:20,000 Welcome Bonus Rp 25.000 Extra Bonus Tambahan Withdraw Rp 2.000.000 0 00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:25,000 CashBack Mix Parlay 100% Bonus Ajak teman 45,2% 1 00:00:15,250 --> 00:00:21,333 ♪ Just as clear as the spots on the sun ♪ 2 00:00:21,417 --> 00:00:25,583 ♪ We are wired to be one ♪ 3 00:00:26,667 --> 00:00:28,166 ♪ And my heart... ♪ 4 00:00:55,166 --> 00:00:56,083 - Yeah? 5 00:00:56,166 --> 00:00:57,583 - Hey, did you get my text? 6 00:00:57,667 --> 00:00:59,625 - Uh, I did. 7 00:00:59,709 --> 00:01:02,125 Essentials, is that okay? 8 00:01:02,208 --> 00:01:03,125 Anything's fine. 9 00:01:03,208 --> 00:01:06,125 - Okay, perfect. - Actually, no. Get, um... 10 00:01:06,208 --> 00:01:09,375 Promise Ultra. Promise Ultra. 11 00:01:09,458 --> 00:01:11,583 - Uh... 12 00:01:11,667 --> 00:01:13,375 Okay. 13 00:01:13,458 --> 00:01:15,250 You know, they say it's normal, 14 00:01:15,333 --> 00:01:18,458 But I've had some crap come out of my vag'. 15 00:01:18,542 --> 00:01:20,083 That's some real sci-fi shit. 16 00:01:20,166 --> 00:01:24,917 - Are you trying to get me aroused? Because if you are, erection accomplished. 17 00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:27,375 - Hmm... sexy. 18 00:01:28,417 --> 00:01:30,583 - How is he? - Almost out. 19 00:01:30,667 --> 00:01:34,208 Dear Jesus, let him be out. 20 00:01:34,291 --> 00:01:36,417 Oh, hang on. - Yeah, yeah. 21 00:01:40,375 --> 00:01:43,083 Oh... what did she say? 22 00:01:43,166 --> 00:01:46,166 Purpose... promise! 23 00:01:46,250 --> 00:01:48,291 - Ken? - Yeah. 24 00:01:48,375 --> 00:01:51,500 - That was your mom. 25 00:01:51,583 --> 00:01:53,208 It's your dad. 26 00:01:54,750 --> 00:01:57,166 - Why would my mom be... 27 00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:08,709 Okay, Mom. Alright, me too. 28 00:02:08,792 --> 00:02:10,834 Bye. 29 00:02:10,917 --> 00:02:13,583 - Did she say what happened? 30 00:02:15,792 --> 00:02:18,417 - Yeah, he has a... aneurysm. 31 00:02:23,417 --> 00:02:24,542 - Ah! - Oh, sorry. 32 00:02:24,625 --> 00:02:26,375 Boobs. 33 00:02:27,250 --> 00:02:29,417 - Do aneurysms hurt? 34 00:02:29,500 --> 00:02:32,333 - I have no idea. 35 00:02:33,542 --> 00:02:35,542 - You didn't pump? 36 00:02:35,625 --> 00:02:39,375 - I fell asleep with the milker in my hand like some narcoleptic cow. 37 00:02:39,458 --> 00:02:40,875 - That was my band's name in high school. 38 00:02:40,959 --> 00:02:43,458 The Narcoleptic Cows. 39 00:02:44,542 --> 00:02:45,792 - I know you didn't talk much. 40 00:02:47,834 --> 00:02:50,625 - Or ever. 41 00:02:55,959 --> 00:02:58,792 You think I should go? 42 00:03:00,667 --> 00:03:02,625 - To your dad's funeral? 43 00:03:05,417 --> 00:03:07,583 Your... your dad's funeral. 44 00:03:07,667 --> 00:03:10,500 - I know, but I mean, it's a last-minute plane ticket and-- 45 00:03:10,583 --> 00:03:13,500 - Who gives a fuck? It's your dad! It's your dad's funeral! 46 00:03:13,583 --> 00:03:17,542 Yeah, you have to go! What are you, dead inside?! 47 00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:22,250 - Oh, hey, hey, hey... 48 00:03:22,333 --> 00:03:24,417 It's alright. 49 00:03:24,500 --> 00:03:26,333 - It's these fucking hormones. 50 00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:32,291 Is your mom gonna go? - Um... 51 00:03:32,375 --> 00:03:36,458 I don't know. She doesn't really go anywhere. 52 00:03:37,959 --> 00:03:40,875 - Promise me we'll never get divorced! 53 00:03:42,250 --> 00:03:46,500 - It's a big ask, sweetie. - Promise me and when I die, 54 00:03:46,583 --> 00:03:51,417 you fucking make our son go to my funeral, even if I was the worst mom in the world! 55 00:03:52,291 --> 00:03:55,583 - There are a lot of assumptions there. 56 00:03:55,667 --> 00:03:57,000 - Ken, you listen to me, man! 57 00:03:57,083 --> 00:04:00,834 I'm still as big as the house, and my boobs feel like cement and-- 58 00:04:00,917 --> 00:04:03,375 - Whoa, okay, okay, I promise. We'll go. 59 00:04:03,458 --> 00:04:07,333 I'll bring my hot new girlfriend and... you know... what's his name, in the crib? 60 00:04:11,834 --> 00:04:15,750 We really have to name him! 61 00:04:15,834 --> 00:04:18,375 Are we like the worst parents ever? 62 00:04:20,166 --> 00:04:22,875 - Maybe top ten. 63 00:04:30,959 --> 00:04:34,333 - Hey... - Mm? 64 00:04:34,917 --> 00:04:37,542 - Did you get diapers? 65 00:04:37,625 --> 00:04:39,000 - Did you ask me to get... 66 00:04:39,083 --> 00:04:41,875 What are you doing? 67 00:04:42,792 --> 00:04:46,542 - I don't know. It's been a while and... 68 00:04:46,625 --> 00:04:49,333 I thought maybe this could, uh... 69 00:04:50,083 --> 00:04:52,542 ...cheer you up. 70 00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:53,792 - Oh... 71 00:04:53,875 --> 00:04:55,917 Are you sure? 72 00:05:01,250 --> 00:05:02,583 - There... 73 00:05:05,834 --> 00:05:08,542 - Oh... a little cold. 74 00:05:12,542 --> 00:05:15,667 - Ow, no! - Sorry. I forgot. 75 00:05:19,333 --> 00:05:21,208 - God, I... 76 00:05:21,291 --> 00:05:22,959 ...love your dick. 77 00:05:26,417 --> 00:05:30,208 - Maybe we could, uh... try something a little more fun. 78 00:05:30,291 --> 00:05:33,417 And time. 79 00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:35,583 - Wait, oh... 80 00:05:35,667 --> 00:05:37,667 - Would you please get that, babe? I have to go swap out my pad. 81 00:05:40,125 --> 00:05:42,709 Yeah, on it. 82 00:05:47,792 --> 00:05:51,750 Okay, coming, you little... cock-blocker. 83 00:06:05,417 --> 00:06:06,500 - Ken?! 84 00:06:09,834 --> 00:06:11,834 Listen, about that, um... 85 00:06:12,959 --> 00:06:15,709 Ah, there's the little one! 86 00:06:15,792 --> 00:06:19,291 Right where the corporate screen saver should be, huh? 87 00:06:19,375 --> 00:06:22,917 - Yeah, I realized I didn't have any pictures on my desk, so... 88 00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:26,917 - Ah, well, at least, it's not a YouTube video of the actual birth, am I right? 89 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:28,959 I guess. 90 00:06:29,041 --> 00:06:31,834 - God, you know, I remember our first... 91 00:06:31,917 --> 00:06:34,375 Up every 15 minutes, couldn't get any sleep, 92 00:06:34,458 --> 00:06:36,333 the wife and I are at each other's throats... 93 00:06:36,417 --> 00:06:38,000 - Yeah, I know what you're saying. 94 00:06:38,083 --> 00:06:40,834 Sometimes, I just... wanna hop in the car 95 00:06:40,917 --> 00:06:46,709 and drive till my whole life is just a memory fading in the rearview. 96 00:06:48,709 --> 00:06:51,917 - What the hell is wrong with you? 97 00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:54,583 Ken, this is a... family company. 98 00:06:54,667 --> 00:06:57,542 - Right, no, I just thought we were... uh... 99 00:06:58,166 --> 00:07:04,917 Speaking of families, would it be okay if I took a couple of personal days? 100 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:07,709 I have a funeral. - Oh... 101 00:07:07,792 --> 00:07:10,834 I'm sorry, who? - Uh, my dad. 102 00:07:13,542 --> 00:07:15,667 - Bring it in here. Come on. - What? 103 00:07:15,750 --> 00:07:18,875 - Come here. Come on! - Okay... 104 00:07:18,959 --> 00:07:21,959 Okay. 105 00:07:22,917 --> 00:07:27,000 - What happened? - Um... it's an aneurysm. 106 00:07:27,083 --> 00:07:30,500 Those are awful. 107 00:07:31,750 --> 00:07:34,500 - Yeah, I've heard they're-- - So when do you think you'll be back? 108 00:07:34,583 --> 00:07:37,375 - Um... I can probably be back by Monday? 109 00:07:38,417 --> 00:07:42,125 - Oh, well, at least, you're not gonna miss the wine and liquor convention, right? 110 00:07:44,959 --> 00:07:47,792 God, doesn't it seem like we just had WIZDIC the other day? 111 00:07:47,875 --> 00:07:49,083 Hey, listen, how's that PowerPoint coming? 112 00:07:49,166 --> 00:07:52,625 - Good, good, good. I thought I'd just finish it on the plane. 113 00:07:52,709 --> 00:07:56,625 - No, no, no. You are going to grieve on the plane. 114 00:07:56,709 --> 00:07:59,667 - Right. - Of course, we do need it, so... 115 00:07:59,750 --> 00:08:03,667 - Yeah. Do we need it, though? Just... 116 00:08:03,750 --> 00:08:08,792 because, I feel like I... I do one every year. 117 00:08:08,875 --> 00:08:12,041 And it seems like the client never actually looks at it. 118 00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:14,500 - And the one time you leave your house 119 00:08:14,583 --> 00:08:18,542 without your spare tire... - Is the time you get a flat. 120 00:08:19,792 --> 00:08:20,709 - Alright. 121 00:08:20,792 --> 00:08:23,083 - So look, do we send flowers 122 00:08:23,166 --> 00:08:25,625 or is there some kind of aneurysm fun run? 123 00:08:28,083 --> 00:08:28,959 - The flowers works. 124 00:08:31,500 --> 00:08:33,917 I'll see you in two whole days. 125 00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:37,875 - Hey, and I sent you that list of names, just so you have it. 126 00:08:39,417 --> 00:08:41,625 - Alright. - Oh, my God! 127 00:08:41,709 --> 00:08:43,834 You're finally throwing him out!? 128 00:08:43,917 --> 00:08:48,208 - He's just going on a trip and I'm seeing him off 1950's housewife style. 129 00:08:48,291 --> 00:08:49,917 - Well, when the husband's away... 130 00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:53,458 What time should I come over? - Any time is a good time. 131 00:08:53,542 --> 00:08:55,667 - Okay... - You better hurry home, Daddy. 132 00:08:57,959 --> 00:08:59,875 - Alright, try to get some sleep on the plane. 133 00:08:59,959 --> 00:09:00,500 I should go. 134 00:09:00,583 --> 00:09:03,500 - Okay. - Love you. 135 00:09:04,041 --> 00:09:06,959 - Um, hello! 136 00:09:07,250 --> 00:09:08,709 Dad? 137 00:09:19,333 --> 00:09:23,208 It's fine. He's not yours anyway! So... 138 00:09:24,834 --> 00:09:26,041 - Hi, are you here for Ken? 139 00:09:31,667 --> 00:09:35,208 ♪ A darker gray is breaking through a lighter one ♪ 140 00:09:39,542 --> 00:09:41,875 ♪ A thousand sharpened elbows in the underground ♪ 141 00:09:44,083 --> 00:09:50,792 ♪ That hollowed hurried sound of feet on polished floor ♪ 142 00:09:50,875 --> 00:09:54,834 ♪ And in the dollar store ♪ 143 00:09:54,917 --> 00:09:58,625 ♪ The clerk is closing up ♪ 144 00:09:58,709 --> 00:10:01,709 ♪ And counting loonies trying not to say ♪ 145 00:10:02,583 --> 00:10:06,083 ♪ I hate Winnipeg ♪ 146 00:10:07,333 --> 00:10:08,959 - Are you sure you're doing okay? 147 00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:11,375 - Yes, you don't have to ask me that anymore. 148 00:10:11,458 --> 00:10:14,250 It's not like you can miss something that was never there in the first place. 149 00:10:14,333 --> 00:10:17,709 - Don't start. - I'm not starting. 150 00:10:17,792 --> 00:10:20,917 - I did the best I could. - I wasn't talking about you. 151 00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:25,208 - I worked incredibly hard to give you a good, normal home. Don't be so sensitive. 152 00:10:25,291 --> 00:10:26,875 - I'm not being sensitive. 153 00:10:26,959 --> 00:10:28,583 - You're being defensive. 154 00:10:29,625 --> 00:10:31,375 So, how are the bar plans going? 155 00:10:31,458 --> 00:10:33,959 - Gastropub, watch out. 156 00:10:34,041 --> 00:10:38,000 Uh... kind of on hold. I had a space picked out, 157 00:10:38,083 --> 00:10:40,875 but money's a little tight since the baby came. 158 00:10:40,959 --> 00:10:44,875 - It's a shame your father never got to meet his grandson. 159 00:10:44,959 --> 00:10:47,667 Dare I hope there's a name? 160 00:10:47,750 --> 00:10:50,000 - Working on it. - For the love of God! 161 00:10:50,083 --> 00:10:53,041 - Okay, look, it's not like you come to visit anyway. 162 00:10:53,125 --> 00:10:55,375 - Maybe if I were invited. - I shouldn't... 163 00:10:55,458 --> 00:10:58,083 How about next month? 164 00:10:58,166 --> 00:11:00,750 - Next month? It's our busiest time. 165 00:11:00,834 --> 00:11:04,125 - Ah... busiest time in office management? 166 00:11:04,208 --> 00:11:06,625 - Ah, it's pre-pre tax planning season. 167 00:11:06,709 --> 00:11:10,041 Plus we have two birthdays and a retirement. 168 00:11:10,125 --> 00:11:12,959 Can't imagine the mess I'd come back to. 169 00:11:13,041 --> 00:11:14,834 - Can't imagine. 170 00:11:22,583 --> 00:11:24,000 - Oh! 171 00:11:24,083 --> 00:11:26,542 Wow, my ex-husband is dead. 172 00:11:26,625 --> 00:11:27,959 Guess it's my turn next. 173 00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:31,959 - That's a happy thought. 174 00:11:33,750 --> 00:11:37,583 Are you still... seeing that guy with the thing? 175 00:11:37,667 --> 00:11:38,834 What's his name? Oscar. 176 00:11:38,917 --> 00:11:43,041 - Oscar? No, he and his wife moved to Florida. 177 00:11:44,667 --> 00:11:46,542 - Huh... - I'm joking. 178 00:11:46,625 --> 00:11:49,291 He had a stroke. Everyone's dying. 179 00:11:50,834 --> 00:11:54,667 - I think it might be... - Motherfucker! 180 00:11:54,750 --> 00:11:55,834 So, where's the service? 181 00:11:59,333 --> 00:12:01,542 Or should I guess? 182 00:12:06,208 --> 00:12:08,667 - Welcome to Niakwa Golf and Country. 183 00:12:08,750 --> 00:12:10,750 Would you like to sign the condolence book? 184 00:12:10,834 --> 00:12:13,750 - Oh, uh... sure. 185 00:12:16,792 --> 00:12:19,000 Who gets this after? 186 00:12:19,083 --> 00:12:20,834 - Uh... 187 00:12:20,917 --> 00:12:24,709 It condoles the family. Are you related? 188 00:12:24,792 --> 00:12:29,166 - I am, yeah. I'm his son. - Dude. 189 00:12:30,041 --> 00:12:33,875 - Oh, thanks. It's always nice to... hear... 190 00:12:36,041 --> 00:12:38,000 - Someone wanted to talk to you. 191 00:12:42,709 --> 00:12:44,417 Mr. Kendall? 192 00:12:49,166 --> 00:12:52,125 - I'm guessing you're Ken? Andy's son, hi. 193 00:12:52,208 --> 00:12:56,792 Vince Kendall, your dad's attorney and part of his Friday foursome. 194 00:12:56,875 --> 00:12:58,083 - I guess not anymore, though. 195 00:12:59,750 --> 00:13:01,333 I don't know why I said that. 196 00:13:01,417 --> 00:13:02,333 - Your dad always told me about your great sense of humour. 197 00:13:02,417 --> 00:13:05,041 - Oh, he did? 198 00:13:06,166 --> 00:13:09,834 - Hey! Why don't we go talk in the Hazelton room? 199 00:13:10,917 --> 00:13:12,458 Yeah, the Hazelton room, named after Vic Hazelton, 200 00:13:12,542 --> 00:13:18,208 great, great golfer, but an even greater alcoholic. And a mean alcoholic. 201 00:13:18,291 --> 00:13:20,208 - Really? - I was afraid of him. 202 00:13:20,291 --> 00:13:21,250 He once killed a horse with a 9 iron. 203 00:13:21,333 --> 00:13:24,041 - Well... 204 00:13:24,125 --> 00:13:28,166 So I assume this is about my dad's will? 205 00:13:28,250 --> 00:13:31,709 - The vultures are three deep at the bar, passed apps are almost gone. 206 00:13:31,792 --> 00:13:35,959 I swear to God. Half those guys never even met Andy, but you put a pig in a blanket... 207 00:13:36,041 --> 00:13:40,083 - Ken, Jeff Stedmon. Jeff's the executive of your dad's will. Jeff, Ken. 208 00:13:40,166 --> 00:13:41,166 - Ken, nice to meet you. 209 00:13:41,250 --> 00:13:43,083 I'm sorry about your dad, but if I know Andy, 210 00:13:43,166 --> 00:13:46,875 he's trying to dig Jesus for a 50-dollar Nassau as we speak. 211 00:13:46,959 --> 00:13:49,000 - He would do that, wouldn't he?! 212 00:13:49,083 --> 00:13:53,333 "Excuse me, Mr. Christ, but isn't that a hurricane about to hit India?!" 213 00:13:53,959 --> 00:13:56,625 - Whoop! Classic Andy foot wedge! 214 00:13:56,709 --> 00:13:58,208 - I have no idea what's happening. 215 00:13:58,291 --> 00:13:59,750 - You need a drink. - Uh, I'm okay. 216 00:13:59,834 --> 00:14:00,959 - I wasn't asking. - Oh... 217 00:14:02,417 --> 00:14:05,250 - Rachel! 218 00:14:06,417 --> 00:14:07,625 Your dad's paying! 219 00:14:07,709 --> 00:14:11,083 Open bar, passed apps, part of his last will and testament. 220 00:14:11,166 --> 00:14:13,250 - First and last time he ever bought a round. 221 00:14:13,333 --> 00:14:15,333 - Rachel, can you get Ken here a little something? 222 00:14:15,417 --> 00:14:18,458 - Yeah, just a light beer. - Kid, it's a wake. 223 00:14:18,542 --> 00:14:20,792 Bring him one of these, freshen mine up. 224 00:14:22,333 --> 00:14:23,875 There's a hole in the glass. 225 00:14:25,458 --> 00:14:28,000 - So... shall we get down to it? 226 00:14:34,834 --> 00:14:37,458 - You guys do a lot of this estate work at the golf course? 227 00:14:37,542 --> 00:14:39,875 - Well, business goes where business gets done. 228 00:14:39,959 --> 00:14:42,166 That's why so many Koreans are... Here we go! 229 00:14:43,625 --> 00:14:46,375 This is for you. 230 00:14:49,291 --> 00:14:50,583 - Oh... this is... 231 00:14:50,667 --> 00:14:53,458 - Your dad's ashes. 232 00:14:56,208 --> 00:14:59,125 Gentlemen, I am proud to present... 233 00:15:00,875 --> 00:15:03,166 Andy Wall's final words. 234 00:15:17,166 --> 00:15:19,208 - It's slower than a ladies' foursome. 235 00:15:21,875 --> 00:15:26,500 - My name is Andy Wall, and this is my last will and testament. 236 00:15:26,583 --> 00:15:29,083 Do I say that? Okay. 237 00:15:29,166 --> 00:15:31,125 I've only one request of my son, 238 00:15:31,208 --> 00:15:36,333 and that's that he scatter my ashes in the middle of the field at Investors Stadium. 239 00:15:36,417 --> 00:15:40,000 If he does this, then, he gets everything. 240 00:15:40,083 --> 00:15:42,875 It's not much, but then, when my dad passed, 241 00:15:42,959 --> 00:15:44,583 I got shit all, and the government took most of that. 242 00:15:44,667 --> 00:15:47,083 - That's the feds for you. 243 00:15:47,166 --> 00:15:49,041 - Now, if he doesn't get it done, well, then, 244 00:15:49,125 --> 00:15:55,041 my estate goes to the club for the construction of a members-only steam room, 245 00:15:55,125 --> 00:15:57,875 which could have been done last fiscal, 246 00:15:57,959 --> 00:16:02,125 but Steve London isn't much of an accountant, so now, it's up to me. 247 00:16:02,208 --> 00:16:05,542 - Boy, do not get him started on Steve London. 248 00:16:05,625 --> 00:16:08,875 - And it has to be done within two days of my service. 249 00:16:08,959 --> 00:16:11,291 I don't wanna sit on some shelf somewhere while my son 250 00:16:11,375 --> 00:16:15,250 slaps his dick around trying to figure out what's what. 251 00:16:16,417 --> 00:16:17,959 Uh, Vince has the details 252 00:16:18,041 --> 00:16:23,250 and Jeff'll make sure it gets done before the money gets handed over. 253 00:16:23,333 --> 00:16:25,542 Okay, that's it. 254 00:16:25,625 --> 00:16:29,083 Would you... go find that oriental nurse, you know, the one with the-- 255 00:16:33,625 --> 00:16:36,458 - Why did he look like that? I thought he had an aneurysm? 256 00:16:36,542 --> 00:16:39,959 - Well, the aneurysm was one of the side effects of the lung cancer. 257 00:16:40,041 --> 00:16:40,959 - Lung cancer? 258 00:16:41,041 --> 00:16:43,375 - And a lifetime of self-medicating. 259 00:16:43,458 --> 00:16:45,417 - Yeah, we all thought his liver would go first. 260 00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:47,417 - Yeah, he never even got to the chemo, you know. 261 00:16:47,500 --> 00:16:50,083 By the time he got his saggy ass to the doctor, 262 00:16:50,166 --> 00:16:52,291 he was already line seven with a marshal up his ass. 263 00:16:52,375 --> 00:16:55,041 - Nothing to do but pick up and head in... 264 00:16:55,125 --> 00:16:57,959 to that 19th hole in the sky. 265 00:16:58,041 --> 00:17:01,083 - Golf terms. Golf terms. - Mm-hmm. 266 00:17:01,166 --> 00:17:02,750 - Any questions? 267 00:17:02,834 --> 00:17:03,750 - Well, uh... - Thanks, Rachel. 268 00:17:03,834 --> 00:17:06,417 - A few, yeah. Um... 269 00:17:06,500 --> 00:17:09,959 - We really don't amount to much in the end, do we? 270 00:17:10,041 --> 00:17:14,667 - Why would... why would he want his ashes scattered at Investors Stadium? 271 00:17:14,750 --> 00:17:17,041 - It was his only request. 272 00:17:17,125 --> 00:17:19,041 - That and the open bar! - And the passed apps. 273 00:17:19,125 --> 00:17:20,959 - And the estate...? 274 00:17:21,041 --> 00:17:24,000 - I'm not allowed to tell you the amount until it's all done. 275 00:17:24,083 --> 00:17:28,208 - 40 years in sales. God, that bastard knew how to incentivize. 276 00:17:31,667 --> 00:17:34,208 Uh... how would I even... 277 00:17:35,125 --> 00:17:37,083 - Look, we're not gonna force you. 278 00:17:37,166 --> 00:17:38,959 - No one's got a gun to your head. - This is not China. 279 00:17:39,041 --> 00:17:40,250 - I read a thing, when the next generation of this country 280 00:17:40,333 --> 00:17:42,667 is gonna come out the chute speaking Mandarin. 281 00:17:42,750 --> 00:17:45,125 - Really? - Listen, I have... 282 00:17:45,208 --> 00:17:47,625 a lot of stuff on my plate right now, uh... 283 00:17:47,709 --> 00:17:49,917 Could I have a little time to think about it? 284 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:51,458 - Of course, absolutely. 285 00:17:51,542 --> 00:17:53,750 Though we should get this show on the road. 286 00:17:53,834 --> 00:17:56,000 Some mourners have their T-times. 287 00:17:56,083 --> 00:17:59,458 Not that they'd walk or anything, but your dad really hated slow play. 288 00:17:59,542 --> 00:18:03,375 - "While we're young!" - He said that a lot. 289 00:18:03,458 --> 00:18:05,542 - Rest in peace. 290 00:18:07,417 --> 00:18:09,125 Shall we go? - Yeah. 291 00:18:11,333 --> 00:18:14,417 - Well, I'd like to thank everyone for coming 292 00:18:14,500 --> 00:18:18,375 to this celebration of life. 293 00:18:18,458 --> 00:18:21,250 The other day, we lost a friend, a colleague, 294 00:18:21,333 --> 00:18:24,333 and a man who couldn't hit a 7-iron to save his life. 295 00:18:26,125 --> 00:18:29,250 So to that end, we are putting Andy's name on a plaque, 296 00:18:29,333 --> 00:18:32,333 on the ball washer on Number 9, Andy's favourite hole. 297 00:18:32,417 --> 00:18:34,667 - Not his favourite! - Yeah, okay. 298 00:18:34,750 --> 00:18:40,166 - My fondest memory of Andy was when he hit a wedge off a tree 299 00:18:40,250 --> 00:18:44,166 and it landed in that tiny hollow where a pipe was broken. 300 00:18:44,250 --> 00:18:48,291 And he wanted to call it... ground under repair. 301 00:18:48,375 --> 00:18:50,125 But... 302 00:18:50,208 --> 00:18:53,291 - Serving on the logistics committee is a thankless task. 303 00:18:53,375 --> 00:18:56,375 But Andy was always good about stepping up. 304 00:18:56,458 --> 00:18:57,417 Oh! 305 00:18:59,709 --> 00:19:04,500 - The specialty ad game is more than just logos on pens. 306 00:19:04,583 --> 00:19:05,375 And he knew that. 307 00:19:07,500 --> 00:19:09,166 He got that. 308 00:19:10,458 --> 00:19:14,417 - We said, "Andy, that's not ground under repair. 309 00:19:14,500 --> 00:19:17,125 That's a water hazard!" 310 00:19:18,458 --> 00:19:23,166 - Uh... so when you see the new compressed air spikes cleaner, 311 00:19:23,250 --> 00:19:26,083 you should know Andy fought for that. 312 00:19:26,166 --> 00:19:30,583 Also, Spring Fling tickets are now on sale. Thank you. 313 00:19:32,542 --> 00:19:34,917 - Now, some of you may know that... 314 00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:38,500 Andy left behind a son. 315 00:19:38,583 --> 00:19:40,709 Ken. 316 00:19:40,792 --> 00:19:42,458 Ken, would you stand for the people? 317 00:19:45,792 --> 00:19:47,750 And now, Ken's gonna say a few words. 318 00:20:01,750 --> 00:20:04,250 - Hello. 319 00:20:04,333 --> 00:20:07,083 Uh... I didn't really prepare anything, 320 00:20:07,166 --> 00:20:11,208 so I'm not sure why I'm looking through my jacket... 321 00:20:11,291 --> 00:20:13,125 Wow... 322 00:20:13,208 --> 00:20:16,375 Uh, what can I say about my dad? 323 00:20:16,458 --> 00:20:18,625 Well, he... Oh! 324 00:20:18,709 --> 00:20:20,208 Thank you. 325 00:20:20,291 --> 00:20:23,333 - The apple doesn't fall far from the tree! 326 00:20:25,542 --> 00:20:31,583 - Last time I saw him was at my wedding five years ago. 327 00:20:31,667 --> 00:20:33,291 He flew in late and left early. 328 00:20:33,375 --> 00:20:38,375 Last time I talked to him was last Christmas. 329 00:20:38,458 --> 00:20:40,834 Yeah, well... I tried to talk to him. 330 00:20:40,917 --> 00:20:46,125 If you called after 4, you really never knew what you were gonna get. 331 00:20:49,709 --> 00:20:51,250 My dad was, uh... 332 00:20:51,750 --> 00:20:53,542 He was... 333 00:20:54,917 --> 00:20:57,500 He worked a lot. 334 00:20:58,583 --> 00:21:01,542 He... must've liked his job. 335 00:21:01,625 --> 00:21:06,375 He always paid his child support on time. I think. 336 00:21:07,834 --> 00:21:10,166 He loved golf, 337 00:21:10,250 --> 00:21:10,834 probably more than... 338 00:21:10,917 --> 00:21:14,250 anything, really. 339 00:21:16,041 --> 00:21:18,834 I remember... 340 00:21:18,917 --> 00:21:23,000 he used to love telling this one joke 341 00:21:23,083 --> 00:21:25,667 when I was a kid, over and over. 342 00:21:26,583 --> 00:21:31,333 It was about this golfer who got home late 343 00:21:31,417 --> 00:21:36,375 and his wife was worried, upset. 344 00:21:36,458 --> 00:21:40,542 And the golfer explained that on the... 345 00:21:40,625 --> 00:21:45,959 on the course, one of the foursome had a heart attack and died. 346 00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:50,291 Yeah... Uh... 347 00:21:50,375 --> 00:21:53,417 And the wife says, "Wow, that's awful." 348 00:21:53,500 --> 00:21:58,375 And then the husband says, "Yeah, it was terrible. 349 00:21:58,458 --> 00:22:01,375 Just... just terrible. 350 00:22:01,458 --> 00:22:06,625 The rest of the day was just: Hit your ball, drag Walter. 351 00:22:08,667 --> 00:22:10,834 Hit your ball, drag Walter." 352 00:22:16,667 --> 00:22:18,792 Here's to you, Dad. 353 00:22:18,875 --> 00:22:22,375 I may not have known you well, but... you brought me into this world, 354 00:22:22,458 --> 00:22:24,667 served on some committees, 355 00:22:25,500 --> 00:22:28,792 and the ninth hole was your favourite. 356 00:22:28,875 --> 00:22:30,667 One man's legacy. Cheers. 357 00:22:39,500 --> 00:22:41,250 - Thank you, Ken. 358 00:22:41,333 --> 00:22:45,583 Well, there's gonna be a brief PowerPoint presentation, 359 00:22:45,667 --> 00:22:48,834 and then, in honour of Andy, we can all go stand in the sand trap. 360 00:22:49,834 --> 00:22:51,083 Rachel, would you grab the lights? 361 00:22:54,166 --> 00:22:56,417 ♪ There's one pet I like to pet ♪ 362 00:22:56,500 --> 00:22:58,709 ♪ And every evening we get set ♪ 363 00:22:58,792 --> 00:23:00,125 ♪ I stroke it every chance I get ♪ 364 00:23:00,208 --> 00:23:03,458 ♪ It's my girl's pussy ♪ 365 00:23:03,542 --> 00:23:05,917 ♪ Seldom plays and never purrs ♪ 366 00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:07,959 ♪ And I love the thoughts it stirs ♪ 367 00:23:08,041 --> 00:23:10,500 ♪ But I don't mind because it's hers ♪ 368 00:23:10,583 --> 00:23:13,000 ♪ It's my girl's pussy ♪ 369 00:23:16,500 --> 00:23:17,667 Well, it was quite a speech. 370 00:23:19,667 --> 00:23:21,375 - I don't even know why I came back for this. 371 00:23:21,458 --> 00:23:24,542 - Yeah, it's a gut-punch to the nads alright. 372 00:23:25,542 --> 00:23:28,625 Say, how's your mom? I thought she might come. 373 00:23:28,709 --> 00:23:31,458 - Guy disappears from my life for 20 years and expects me 374 00:23:31,542 --> 00:23:34,959 just to... grant his final wish. 375 00:23:35,041 --> 00:23:39,458 - You wanna know why he wants his ashes scattered on the field? 376 00:23:39,542 --> 00:23:41,333 - It's not like he was a fan. 377 00:23:41,417 --> 00:23:43,875 Didn't go to the games. 378 00:23:43,959 --> 00:23:45,583 Didn't go anywhere. 379 00:23:46,583 --> 00:23:49,458 - He had season tickets before you were born. 380 00:23:49,542 --> 00:23:51,041 - What? - Yeah, and then, 381 00:23:51,125 --> 00:23:54,875 you came along and... you know, he just... 382 00:23:54,959 --> 00:23:59,375 He let them go. You know, said it was just too expensive with a kid and all. 383 00:23:59,458 --> 00:24:00,709 And it broke his heart. 384 00:24:00,792 --> 00:24:03,792 But he never went to another game. For you. 385 00:24:05,542 --> 00:24:06,583 - Is that true? 386 00:24:07,750 --> 00:24:09,917 Hey! 387 00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:11,625 - Your dad came from a generation that knew 388 00:24:11,709 --> 00:24:15,291 how to sacrifice without putting it on Facebook. 389 00:24:15,375 --> 00:24:18,000 Hey, everybody, I'm selfie-ing myself washing oil off an owl. 390 00:24:18,083 --> 00:24:20,625 Give me a thumbs up and a government grant. 391 00:24:20,709 --> 00:24:24,709 - I hate to rush you, Ken, but I have some other legal stuff that I should attend to. 392 00:24:24,792 --> 00:24:25,667 - Oh, yeah. Uh... 393 00:24:25,750 --> 00:24:28,709 Listen, I'm... I'm sorry, guys, but-- 394 00:24:28,792 --> 00:24:30,875 - Look, kid, I know how you feel, but... 395 00:24:30,959 --> 00:24:32,875 trust me, it'll be worth your while. 396 00:24:32,959 --> 00:24:35,542 - Jeff, the legal terms of Andy's will quite clearly state-- 397 00:24:35,625 --> 00:24:38,542 - The legal terms can lick my shitter. 398 00:24:38,625 --> 00:24:41,542 You want it done or not? - Yes I want it done. 399 00:24:41,625 --> 00:24:43,875 And you know what, with no funny stuff-- - Oh, here we go! 400 00:24:43,959 --> 00:24:46,041 Happens every time. Five drinks in, never fails. 401 00:24:46,125 --> 00:24:48,000 - You know what the odds are of the same person 402 00:24:48,083 --> 00:24:52,041 winning the three main prizes at the Spring Fling Raffle lot? 403 00:24:52,125 --> 00:24:54,875 - You know, why don't you just come out and say it? 404 00:24:54,959 --> 00:24:57,000 Say you think I rigged the draw. 405 00:24:57,083 --> 00:24:59,709 - If the Boneco 7114 humidifier fits! 406 00:24:59,792 --> 00:25:00,875 Ball! 407 00:25:00,959 --> 00:25:02,792 What the...? 408 00:25:02,875 --> 00:25:04,667 Marty. 409 00:25:04,750 --> 00:25:08,917 - Hey, we're trying to play through here! Am I right, guys? 410 00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:10,083 - No, that's not right. 411 00:25:10,166 --> 00:25:11,750 - No, we're standing on a bridge. 412 00:25:11,834 --> 00:25:13,875 - This... this is not part of the course. 413 00:25:14,750 --> 00:25:16,500 - Can we just rewind a little? What were you saying there? 414 00:25:16,583 --> 00:25:21,875 - I'm just saying it could go a long way towards setting up a young family. You know? 415 00:25:21,959 --> 00:25:24,083 Well, unless you want your kid to end up like Vinnie's. 416 00:25:24,166 --> 00:25:25,125 One felon and one felon in training. 417 00:25:25,208 --> 00:25:27,291 What? Tell me I'm wrong. 418 00:25:27,375 --> 00:25:28,667 - Look, my oldest is... 419 00:25:32,083 --> 00:25:34,750 ...is truly awful. 420 00:25:34,834 --> 00:25:36,500 Even the social worker says so. - Yeah, lot of good she did. 421 00:25:36,583 --> 00:25:39,500 I'm from the government, I'm here to help. 422 00:25:39,583 --> 00:25:43,000 - She says that some teens just... like to show it in public. 423 00:25:43,083 --> 00:25:47,500 There's nothing you can do other than hope they grow out of it. 424 00:25:47,583 --> 00:25:51,875 Does your kid, uh... unzip his fly and run through the school yelling: 425 00:25:51,959 --> 00:25:54,625 "I'm the teacher, I'm the teacher! Learn this! Learn this!" 426 00:25:54,709 --> 00:25:57,959 Does your kid...? Is that a normal kid thing... 427 00:25:58,041 --> 00:26:01,208 - Well, he's just a baby. So... 428 00:26:03,875 --> 00:26:07,125 - Okay, fine. Tell him. 429 00:26:07,208 --> 00:26:10,792 But the two-day timeline, consider that carved in stone! 430 00:26:10,875 --> 00:26:12,291 - Ah... - Oh, and I will also require 431 00:26:12,375 --> 00:26:17,792 what we call in the law business evidence of disposal of human remains. 432 00:26:19,208 --> 00:26:21,417 - What do they call it outside the law business? 433 00:26:22,208 --> 00:26:24,542 - Lots of things. There's lots of names for it. 434 00:26:24,625 --> 00:26:27,500 - Holy shit! $200,000?! - I know! 435 00:26:27,583 --> 00:26:30,709 All I have to do is take the ashes and scatter them on a football field. 436 00:26:30,792 --> 00:26:33,125 - College fund, hello! 437 00:26:33,208 --> 00:26:35,709 - I know, that's what I was thinking. 438 00:26:35,792 --> 00:26:38,542 Plus, we now can really talk about the other thing that we were, you know, were gonna do. 439 00:26:40,041 --> 00:26:43,500 - What other thing? The gastropub thing? That's still on the table? 440 00:26:43,583 --> 00:26:45,000 - Of course, it's still on the table. 441 00:26:45,083 --> 00:26:47,583 Why would that not be on the table? 442 00:26:47,667 --> 00:26:49,792 Just because there's a kid at the table now? 443 00:26:49,875 --> 00:26:51,250 - Okay, easy, Cranky Pants. 444 00:26:51,333 --> 00:26:52,667 I had to put some stuff on hold too, you know. 445 00:26:52,750 --> 00:26:55,917 I know. I'm sorry. It's... 446 00:26:56,000 --> 00:26:58,875 you know, still dealing with a death in the family. 447 00:26:58,959 --> 00:27:01,667 - Hmm. Still milking that, are we? 448 00:27:01,750 --> 00:27:07,333 - Okay. You realize that there's a half-naked man behind you holding our baby. 449 00:27:07,417 --> 00:27:09,750 - Yeah. I just needed a break. 450 00:27:09,834 --> 00:27:10,834 - Hmm. 451 00:27:10,917 --> 00:27:12,750 Did his shirt need a break too? 452 00:27:12,834 --> 00:27:16,542 - It's covered in your son's puke. Not that I mind. 453 00:27:16,625 --> 00:27:20,709 - Hmm. You're lucky that I am very secure. 454 00:27:20,792 --> 00:27:22,250 - Hmm? 455 00:27:22,333 --> 00:27:25,667 Nothing wrong with looking, is there, Mr. Clear Browser History? 456 00:27:25,750 --> 00:27:29,166 Hey, um... wanna see somethin'? 457 00:27:30,667 --> 00:27:33,041 - Yeah, sure, I mean, is it okay? 458 00:27:33,125 --> 00:27:35,834 Oh! 459 00:27:35,917 --> 00:27:39,166 - Does this look normal to you? 'Cause the Internet says it is, but I do not think so. 460 00:27:39,250 --> 00:27:42,542 - No, it does not look normal! What's wrong with you? 461 00:27:42,625 --> 00:27:44,750 Trust me, it's even worse in person. 462 00:27:44,834 --> 00:27:45,709 - Alright. You know what? I have to go. 463 00:27:45,792 --> 00:27:49,083 Love you. - Yeah, you fucking better. 464 00:27:49,166 --> 00:27:52,125 'Cause he's great with our kid and I bet I can flip him. 465 00:27:56,208 --> 00:27:59,667 You have an appointment with the team's PR person at 10 a.m. tomorrow. 466 00:27:59,750 --> 00:28:04,083 - Uh, okay. What did you tell them? 467 00:28:04,166 --> 00:28:07,125 - That you wanted to discuss a donation... 468 00:28:07,208 --> 00:28:08,291 ...which was kind of true. 469 00:28:08,375 --> 00:28:11,000 - Thanks, Mom. 470 00:28:11,083 --> 00:28:15,750 Hey, did you know that Dad used to have season tickets? 471 00:28:17,333 --> 00:28:18,291 - I did. 472 00:28:18,375 --> 00:28:22,041 - Oh. - Andy... 473 00:28:22,125 --> 00:28:25,875 - Did I know that? - Ashes to ashes... 474 00:28:25,959 --> 00:28:28,083 Whoa! - Whoa, whoa, whoa! 475 00:28:28,166 --> 00:28:29,625 - Oopsie, all good. Easy fix. 476 00:28:29,709 --> 00:28:33,041 - Easy fix!? There's like, what's equivalent to a foot on the floor now. 477 00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:37,625 - It comes at you faster than you think, you know. 478 00:28:37,709 --> 00:28:40,959 I hope I'm not all alone at the end. 479 00:28:41,041 --> 00:28:43,125 - You're not gonna be alone, Mom. 480 00:28:43,208 --> 00:28:47,750 - My son moved to another city, my husband is in a plastic bag. 481 00:28:47,834 --> 00:28:49,083 - Ex-husband! Who you hated. 482 00:28:49,166 --> 00:28:54,125 - Who stole the best years of my life and wore me out, 483 00:28:54,208 --> 00:28:55,583 so nobody else would ever want me. 484 00:28:55,667 --> 00:29:01,041 "Oh, I got time." You get pregnant at 19, you do what you have to... 485 00:29:01,125 --> 00:29:03,667 Ah-ha! 486 00:29:04,583 --> 00:29:07,333 These never tear. - Ah... 487 00:29:07,417 --> 00:29:11,208 Okay, let's move Dad over here. 488 00:29:14,500 --> 00:29:16,834 Let's just... - There's a lot of him. 489 00:29:16,917 --> 00:29:20,125 - Mm-hmm. - I feel like a drug dealer. 490 00:29:22,417 --> 00:29:24,959 - So here's something I was always curious about. 491 00:29:26,750 --> 00:29:29,959 When did you know that you and Dad weren't gonna work out? 492 00:29:30,041 --> 00:29:32,000 - Why do you ask? 493 00:29:32,083 --> 00:29:34,250 - Uh... just wondering. 494 00:29:36,041 --> 00:29:39,750 - I'd have to say the second day of our honeymoon. 495 00:29:41,917 --> 00:29:46,083 Do you remember that Popsicle-stick fort we made when you were in grade school? 496 00:29:47,834 --> 00:29:48,917 It's fun doing activities. 497 00:29:50,792 --> 00:29:52,208 Go on. 498 00:30:11,458 --> 00:30:14,750 - You go in the backseat in there, Dad. 499 00:30:54,834 --> 00:30:56,333 Hello. 500 00:30:56,417 --> 00:31:01,250 - Hey, it's Jeff. What number came up when you got this? 501 00:31:01,333 --> 00:31:04,250 - What... what... my dad's! What number you think came up? 502 00:31:04,333 --> 00:31:07,000 - Yeah, okay, yeah. Well, he said I could have his phone. 503 00:31:07,083 --> 00:31:11,709 So I got some roll-over minutes to use up before I switch the number. Where are you? 504 00:31:11,792 --> 00:31:14,333 - I'm at the Stadium. - Wow! 505 00:31:14,417 --> 00:31:17,291 Just remember, we need a picture, evidence or some shit. 506 00:31:17,375 --> 00:31:18,959 And there's a box of stuff for you at your dad's house. 507 00:31:19,041 --> 00:31:23,250 - Yeah, I'll swing by after. Probably... 508 00:31:24,458 --> 00:31:26,291 I just realize I don't even know where he lived. 509 00:31:26,375 --> 00:31:28,917 - I'll send you the address. I can meet you there. 510 00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:34,125 If you get there first, he keeps the key under a rusty can by the back door. 511 00:31:34,208 --> 00:31:35,250 - Rusty can. Alright. 512 00:31:35,333 --> 00:31:37,208 - Lady, I know there's no phone at the tables-- 513 00:32:01,959 --> 00:32:03,166 - Hello! 514 00:32:05,083 --> 00:32:07,083 Hi, are you Ken? 515 00:32:07,166 --> 00:32:10,166 - Ah, yes. - I'm Katherine. Hi. 516 00:32:10,250 --> 00:32:13,000 Your assistant said on the phone your father recently passed. 517 00:32:13,083 --> 00:32:14,667 I'm so sorry for your loss. - Thank you. 518 00:32:14,750 --> 00:32:19,208 - Have you considered a contribution in your father's name to our Foundation? 519 00:32:19,291 --> 00:32:23,458 You know, we can actually put his name on a brick 520 00:32:23,542 --> 00:32:24,750 on our Wall of Super Fans. 521 00:32:24,834 --> 00:32:29,166 - Well, that's kind of why I'm here. Now this may sound odd, 522 00:32:29,250 --> 00:32:34,500 but my dad really wanted his ashes scattered on the field. 523 00:32:34,583 --> 00:32:38,041 - Hmm... - Your field. 524 00:32:38,125 --> 00:32:39,041 - Hmm... 525 00:32:42,458 --> 00:32:44,125 - That one. 526 00:32:46,208 --> 00:32:48,917 - I totally understand and we can't do that. 527 00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:52,125 Just health issues for the players, coaches, staff... 528 00:32:53,208 --> 00:32:57,208 - And I thought of that, so what if, in addition to a sizeable donation, 529 00:32:57,291 --> 00:33:01,083 I had a professional cleaning service come in with a... 530 00:33:01,166 --> 00:33:04,542 you know, like a Shop-Vac? Or something better. 531 00:33:04,625 --> 00:33:07,500 So that I could just, you know, get a picture with the ashes 532 00:33:07,583 --> 00:33:09,000 being scattered or placed. - Right. 533 00:33:09,083 --> 00:33:12,375 - And they can vacuum up everything and... 534 00:33:12,458 --> 00:33:14,417 like we were never here. - Right, right. 535 00:33:14,500 --> 00:33:18,125 Yeah, no, we can't do that. It's just... it's club policy. 536 00:33:19,000 --> 00:33:23,458 - Really? Do you really get that request enough that there's a rule? 537 00:33:23,542 --> 00:33:28,500 - Well, I mean, anything that's not authorized is considered unauthorized, so... 538 00:33:28,583 --> 00:33:30,083 - Mm-hmm! Right. 539 00:33:30,166 --> 00:33:33,250 So what if this one time... you just... 540 00:33:33,333 --> 00:33:36,041 authorize something that was unauthorized? 541 00:33:36,125 --> 00:33:39,000 - I'm not authorized, yeah. 542 00:33:39,083 --> 00:33:43,959 - Could I speak to someone who is? 543 00:33:44,041 --> 00:33:45,250 - You know, why don't you send us an email? 544 00:33:48,375 --> 00:33:51,250 Now, is there anything else I can help you with? 545 00:33:51,709 --> 00:33:55,375 - Well... no. 546 00:33:55,458 --> 00:33:57,875 - All the best. Yeah, again, 547 00:33:57,959 --> 00:34:00,208 sorry for your loss. - Thank you. 548 00:34:13,208 --> 00:34:18,000 Yeah? - Hey, buddy, it's your boss. 549 00:34:18,083 --> 00:34:20,250 Just wanted to see how the funeral went. 550 00:34:20,333 --> 00:34:24,458 - It went... about as well as could be expected. 551 00:34:24,542 --> 00:34:25,875 - Oh, great, awesome. 552 00:34:25,959 --> 00:34:30,125 So, hey, any progress on the old PP, Senor El Power Pointo? 553 00:34:30,208 --> 00:34:34,625 I hate to ask, but it's... crazy around here. 554 00:34:34,709 --> 00:34:35,792 We're down a guy, so it's nuts. 555 00:34:35,875 --> 00:34:38,625 - Uh... I'm working on it. 556 00:34:38,709 --> 00:34:41,458 - Listen, you do what you need for you first, okay? 557 00:34:41,542 --> 00:34:44,458 Just let me know later today. 558 00:34:44,542 --> 00:34:47,208 - Yeah. Alright. 559 00:35:50,000 --> 00:35:52,333 - Hey. - Oh, shit! 560 00:35:52,417 --> 00:35:53,542 Hey, man. 561 00:35:53,625 --> 00:35:56,125 - What the hell you think you're doing? 562 00:35:56,208 --> 00:36:00,000 - Uh, yeah. Funny story. Actually, I was just... 563 00:36:00,083 --> 00:36:03,458 meeting with your PR department. 564 00:36:03,542 --> 00:36:07,291 - Get off the gate, nutjob. - Yeah, I got you. 565 00:36:07,375 --> 00:36:10,500 Um... If you could just hand me my... my bag real quick. 566 00:36:12,542 --> 00:36:13,458 - What's in it? 567 00:36:15,375 --> 00:36:17,166 You got a bomb in here? 568 00:36:17,250 --> 00:36:22,250 Is this some alt-right false flag operation? 569 00:36:22,333 --> 00:36:25,333 - What, no? No flags... 570 00:36:25,417 --> 00:36:28,208 No, no, no, don't open that, please. 571 00:36:28,291 --> 00:36:29,417 - I think I better get the cops. 572 00:36:31,750 --> 00:36:33,291 - Wait, wait, wait, no! It's my dad. 573 00:36:35,125 --> 00:36:36,542 It's my dead dad. It's his ashes. 574 00:36:36,625 --> 00:36:37,834 - Don't play me, kid. - I'm not playing you. 575 00:36:37,917 --> 00:36:41,458 - How do I know you're just not some jock-sniffing pervert? 576 00:36:43,166 --> 00:36:45,500 - Well, I mean... 577 00:36:45,583 --> 00:36:48,583 It's kinda hard to prove a negative. 578 00:36:48,667 --> 00:36:52,250 Is that a big problem around here? Jock sniffers? 579 00:36:53,083 --> 00:36:54,709 - I've seen some things. 580 00:36:55,834 --> 00:37:00,333 - Huh. - Would you mind getting off my gate, please? 581 00:37:00,417 --> 00:37:02,500 - Yeah. Yes, absolutely. 582 00:37:05,625 --> 00:37:07,542 Alright, here I go. 583 00:37:07,625 --> 00:37:10,625 Okay. 584 00:37:10,709 --> 00:37:13,583 Just hand me my bag, please. - Sure. 585 00:37:14,709 --> 00:37:16,583 What's it worth to you? 586 00:37:17,792 --> 00:37:21,000 - How's 20 bucks? 587 00:37:21,083 --> 00:37:23,500 - Deal. - Alright. 588 00:37:26,750 --> 00:37:29,333 Or... uh... 589 00:37:29,417 --> 00:37:31,166 how about... 590 00:37:31,250 --> 00:37:33,333 I give you everything in my wallet 591 00:37:33,417 --> 00:37:38,375 if you just take those ashes and sprinkle them at midfield? 592 00:37:39,917 --> 00:37:41,792 - How much is everything? 593 00:37:44,375 --> 00:37:45,500 - I got... 594 00:37:45,583 --> 00:37:49,333 20... 40... 50... 595 00:37:50,583 --> 00:37:53,458 I can head to an ATM. - No! 596 00:37:54,834 --> 00:37:57,417 Better off no paper trail. 597 00:37:57,500 --> 00:37:59,333 These guys'll be done in a couple hours. 598 00:37:59,417 --> 00:38:03,208 I'm already off, but I'll come back. 599 00:38:03,291 --> 00:38:04,500 - Perfect. 600 00:38:04,583 --> 00:38:06,625 I'll just wait for you here. - Can't wait. 601 00:38:06,709 --> 00:38:09,333 Security does sweeps, you'll get us caught. 602 00:38:09,417 --> 00:38:12,667 - Okay, here, here. Take my card, okay? 603 00:38:12,750 --> 00:38:16,792 Kenneth Wall, that's me. Here's my phone number, okay? 604 00:38:16,875 --> 00:38:18,917 Take that, if you could text me 605 00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:22,792 a picture of you dumping the ashes at midfield. 606 00:38:22,875 --> 00:38:24,709 - Sure, yeah. - Okay? 607 00:38:24,792 --> 00:38:26,208 You got a phone? - Yeah. 608 00:38:26,291 --> 00:38:27,625 - You know how to text? 609 00:38:29,709 --> 00:38:33,291 Alright, cool. Thanks, man. - You... 610 00:38:34,291 --> 00:38:36,500 If you want... I should say something when I dump him? 611 00:38:36,583 --> 00:38:40,542 - Uh... if the mood strikes you. - I know a poem. 612 00:38:40,625 --> 00:38:44,000 - Cool. That'd be great. 613 00:38:44,083 --> 00:38:46,333 - "Do not stand on my grave and weep. 614 00:38:46,417 --> 00:38:50,208 I am not there, I do not sleep. 615 00:38:50,291 --> 00:38:52,875 I'm a thousand winds that blow. 616 00:38:52,959 --> 00:38:57,208 I'm the diamond glints on snow. 617 00:38:57,291 --> 00:39:00,000 I am the sun on ripened grain. 618 00:39:00,083 --> 00:39:03,333 I am the gentle autumn rain." 619 00:39:03,417 --> 00:39:06,917 - It's beautiful. Thank you. Alright. 620 00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:09,834 - "When you awaken..." - Not done yet, okay. 621 00:39:09,917 --> 00:39:12,083 - "...in the morning hush. 622 00:39:12,166 --> 00:39:15,959 I am the swift uplifting rush 623 00:39:16,041 --> 00:39:18,417 of quiet birds in circled flight. 624 00:39:18,500 --> 00:39:21,667 I am the soft stars that shine at night. 625 00:39:21,750 --> 00:39:24,625 Do not stand at my grave and cry. 626 00:39:24,709 --> 00:39:29,000 I am not there; I did not die." 627 00:40:55,625 --> 00:40:58,083 Hmm... 628 00:41:06,041 --> 00:41:08,583 - Hey, buddy! 629 00:41:08,667 --> 00:41:10,041 How's it going? 630 00:41:10,125 --> 00:41:12,959 I'm in my dad's house. 631 00:41:13,041 --> 00:41:15,834 - Why are you whispering? 632 00:41:15,917 --> 00:41:17,542 - I don't know. 633 00:41:18,417 --> 00:41:19,834 Check this out. 634 00:41:21,041 --> 00:41:24,709 - What is that? - A drill press, I think. 635 00:41:24,792 --> 00:41:26,208 - He wasn't a serial killer, was he? 636 00:41:26,291 --> 00:41:30,208 - Um, I'm gonna go with... 637 00:41:30,291 --> 00:41:32,458 ...maybe. - That's not funny, 638 00:41:32,542 --> 00:41:33,583 that shit's fucking genetic. 639 00:41:35,500 --> 00:41:37,583 - Oh, found the remote. 640 00:41:41,625 --> 00:41:43,875 - Did someone already clear out his stuff? 641 00:41:43,959 --> 00:41:46,000 - No, I think this is just 642 00:41:46,083 --> 00:41:47,667 how he lived. 643 00:41:49,208 --> 00:41:52,083 - Wow... it's really... 644 00:41:52,166 --> 00:41:53,917 lonely. 645 00:41:54,000 --> 00:41:55,917 - Creepy. 646 00:41:59,750 --> 00:42:02,000 Holy shit. 647 00:42:03,875 --> 00:42:06,041 What the... - Wow... 648 00:42:06,125 --> 00:42:09,166 Okay, I guess he had a thing for planes. 649 00:42:09,250 --> 00:42:11,500 - Apparently. 650 00:42:12,709 --> 00:42:14,500 - And Halloween-themed carpeting. 651 00:42:14,583 --> 00:42:18,083 What if he had this like, weird secret fetish that... 652 00:42:18,166 --> 00:42:21,417 Holy shit, Ken, behind you! - What the fuck?! 653 00:42:21,500 --> 00:42:23,750 - Easy, A-Rod! The door was open. 654 00:42:23,834 --> 00:42:25,625 - You scared the shit out of me. Sorry. 655 00:42:27,583 --> 00:42:29,125 Oh, that's my wife, Laurie. 656 00:42:29,208 --> 00:42:33,709 Laurie, this is Jeff, he's the executor of my dad's will. 657 00:42:33,792 --> 00:42:36,709 - Nice to meet you, pretty lady. - Hi! Nice to meet you. 658 00:42:36,792 --> 00:42:39,000 Sorry to scream, 659 00:42:39,083 --> 00:42:41,625 I just didn't exp-- 660 00:42:41,709 --> 00:42:43,583 Fuck, Ken. Not again. 661 00:42:43,667 --> 00:42:45,500 - What did I do? 662 00:42:45,583 --> 00:42:48,709 - They really stay filled out after they pop one, don't they? 663 00:42:50,291 --> 00:42:51,792 I'm talking about her titties. - Yeah, I got it. 664 00:42:55,875 --> 00:42:58,000 - Here's that box I was telling you about. 665 00:42:58,375 --> 00:43:00,709 - Yeah. 666 00:43:02,250 --> 00:43:04,125 Native-American man in a loin cloth. 667 00:43:04,208 --> 00:43:05,792 That's not mine. 668 00:43:07,166 --> 00:43:08,542 Ah... 669 00:43:08,625 --> 00:43:12,250 Sports Illustrated calendar from 2007. 670 00:43:16,667 --> 00:43:19,792 What's this? - Your dad was quite an athlete. 671 00:43:19,875 --> 00:43:24,083 - Yeah, this is mine. From like... 25 years ago. 672 00:43:25,125 --> 00:43:27,834 Peewee division C tournament champion. 673 00:43:27,917 --> 00:43:30,625 Smallest guy on the team. I, uh... I scored the winning touchdown. 674 00:43:30,709 --> 00:43:33,917 Interception, free safety, of course. 675 00:43:34,000 --> 00:43:37,959 Forty-yard run, got tackled at the one... 676 00:43:38,041 --> 00:43:40,375 fumbled, came up with the ball... ah! 677 00:43:40,458 --> 00:43:44,250 Rob Seydoff, the biggest guy on the team fell on my arm, broke it in three places. 678 00:43:44,333 --> 00:43:46,125 Mom never let me play again. - Wow. 679 00:43:46,208 --> 00:43:49,125 And he kept that souvenir all these years. 680 00:43:49,208 --> 00:43:53,667 He probably had some fond memories of you... out there, playing your heart out. 681 00:43:53,750 --> 00:43:58,709 - Yeah, no, he... he missed it. Last-minute meeting. 682 00:43:59,500 --> 00:44:01,083 - You know, a man's gotta work. 683 00:44:01,166 --> 00:44:02,250 - Last-minute meeting means he'd get drunk at lunch. 684 00:44:05,291 --> 00:44:07,959 - Anything else you wanna take? - No, I'm good. 685 00:44:13,792 --> 00:44:16,750 So what's the deal with all the airplane stuff? 686 00:44:16,834 --> 00:44:19,709 - You didn't know? Your dad always wanted to be a pilot. 687 00:44:19,792 --> 00:44:21,041 - Really? - Yeah. 688 00:44:21,125 --> 00:44:22,917 He even took flying lessons when he was y... 689 00:44:23,000 --> 00:44:25,083 Oh, my God! 690 00:44:26,291 --> 00:44:28,291 Yeah, I guess this was the next best thing. 691 00:44:31,083 --> 00:44:32,834 You know, I should probably... 692 00:44:32,917 --> 00:44:35,917 I should probably keep these. 693 00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:38,917 You know, I just wouldn't want the guys at Goodwill getting 694 00:44:39,000 --> 00:44:40,917 the wrong idea about your old man. 695 00:44:42,000 --> 00:44:44,083 - Knock yourself out. 696 00:44:44,166 --> 00:44:45,542 - You hungry? 697 00:44:48,667 --> 00:44:50,750 - It'll be fine. - Oh, I don't know. 698 00:44:50,834 --> 00:44:53,667 I'm the executor, I'm supposed to witness any ash-related activity. 699 00:44:53,750 --> 00:44:55,333 I'll be signing an affidavit. 700 00:44:55,417 --> 00:44:57,959 - Well, it's the only way it was gonna happen. 701 00:44:58,041 --> 00:44:59,166 - Well, I guess. 702 00:44:59,250 --> 00:45:01,583 - Good food here? - No, no, terrible. 703 00:45:01,667 --> 00:45:03,291 Your dad's favourite spot. 704 00:45:03,375 --> 00:45:04,417 Ah, looks like someone got their suspension lifted. 705 00:45:04,500 --> 00:45:06,667 It's a grabby Irish fuck. 706 00:45:06,750 --> 00:45:09,625 Don't get the wrong idea about your dad. 707 00:45:09,709 --> 00:45:12,959 He wasn't some pervert. Never liked to sit right up in sniffer's row. 708 00:45:13,041 --> 00:45:16,333 He said: "Too close ruins the mystery." 709 00:45:16,417 --> 00:45:19,000 - Try watching a kid come out of there. 710 00:45:19,083 --> 00:45:20,917 - What kind of sick bastard are you? 711 00:45:21,917 --> 00:45:23,291 - So, uh... 712 00:45:23,917 --> 00:45:26,709 was my dad seeing anyone? 713 00:45:27,333 --> 00:45:29,959 - Yeah, women get to a certain age, they don't wanna bone anymore. 714 00:45:30,041 --> 00:45:33,917 And your dad was very private about that kind of thing. 715 00:45:34,000 --> 00:45:34,875 And I prefer women of a certain vintage, 716 00:45:34,959 --> 00:45:38,125 but given the choice between nothing and 717 00:45:38,208 --> 00:45:39,959 a young pro with a kung fu grip... 718 00:45:40,041 --> 00:45:41,417 this is not ideal. 719 00:45:41,500 --> 00:45:43,083 - So, the AA meeting broke early. 720 00:45:43,166 --> 00:45:44,917 You got 20 minutes left to the buffet. Get you a drink? 721 00:45:45,000 --> 00:45:47,208 - Oh, thanks, it's a little early for me. 722 00:45:47,291 --> 00:45:48,834 There's a two-drink minimum, honey. 723 00:45:48,917 --> 00:45:50,250 - Well, I guess, uh... 724 00:45:50,333 --> 00:45:51,875 - My God! 725 00:45:51,959 --> 00:45:55,166 You look exactly like this guy I know. 726 00:45:55,250 --> 00:45:58,834 - Yeah, maybe because it's Andy's kid. 727 00:45:58,917 --> 00:46:00,000 - No, shit. 728 00:46:01,083 --> 00:46:03,125 No fucking shit! 729 00:46:03,208 --> 00:46:05,750 Cindy! Get your tits over here! 730 00:46:05,834 --> 00:46:09,291 - Hey, Velvet, could you, uh... get me a Bloody Mary and her sister? 731 00:46:09,375 --> 00:46:10,208 - Lunch of champions. 732 00:46:10,291 --> 00:46:12,667 And you? - Does it have to be alcoholic? 733 00:46:13,417 --> 00:46:16,208 - What are you? A comedian? - I'll just have a Coke. 734 00:46:16,291 --> 00:46:17,375 - Two Jack and Cokes. 735 00:46:18,583 --> 00:46:20,792 - Some horny boys over here looking for a little lap love? 736 00:46:20,875 --> 00:46:22,834 - Who does he look like? 737 00:46:23,917 --> 00:46:25,709 Who does he think he looks like? 738 00:46:28,375 --> 00:46:29,417 - Hello. 739 00:46:30,750 --> 00:46:32,250 - It's like a little Andy. 740 00:46:32,333 --> 00:46:35,208 I mean, not what Andy calls his little Andy, but... 741 00:46:35,291 --> 00:46:37,750 Wow! 742 00:46:37,834 --> 00:46:40,041 - That's his kid. 743 00:46:40,125 --> 00:46:41,333 - Aw... 744 00:46:42,291 --> 00:46:44,250 Hey, I can do a father-son discount. 745 00:46:44,333 --> 00:46:45,875 Where is the old rascal? 746 00:46:45,959 --> 00:46:48,458 - He's uh... he's gone, honey. 747 00:46:50,250 --> 00:46:51,083 He's dead. 748 00:46:51,458 --> 00:46:53,834 - What? 749 00:46:54,500 --> 00:46:57,208 - Well, that's poopy. 750 00:46:57,291 --> 00:46:58,917 Miss, the check, please! 751 00:47:01,333 --> 00:47:03,417 - I knew he was sick. 752 00:47:03,500 --> 00:47:05,875 I'm so sorry-- - For my loss, yes. 753 00:47:05,959 --> 00:47:07,125 Thank you very much. 754 00:47:08,166 --> 00:47:09,083 - How about a dance on the house? 755 00:47:09,166 --> 00:47:12,542 I mean, you guys can still tip if you want. 756 00:47:12,625 --> 00:47:14,375 - I'm okay. - That'd be swell. 757 00:47:14,458 --> 00:47:17,959 - Oh, yay! I've been so horny all morning. 758 00:47:19,000 --> 00:47:20,792 - Stroke of luck for me then. 759 00:47:22,417 --> 00:47:23,959 Your dad was so great. 760 00:47:24,041 --> 00:47:25,750 - Thank you, very sweet of you. 761 00:47:25,834 --> 00:47:27,417 - She's not just saying that. 762 00:47:27,500 --> 00:47:29,375 When Cindy needed braces, her... 763 00:47:29,458 --> 00:47:31,083 Maggie's son's lawyer - 764 00:47:31,166 --> 00:47:32,834 Friday Maggie, not pierced Maggie - 765 00:47:32,917 --> 00:47:34,291 when he turned out to be a total piece of shit, 766 00:47:34,375 --> 00:47:36,875 Andy was the first one with his wallet out. 767 00:47:36,959 --> 00:47:40,166 - Did you know he invented cutting the pockets out of the inside of your sweat pants? 768 00:47:40,250 --> 00:47:42,166 - I did not. But no doubt that he said that. 769 00:47:42,250 --> 00:47:46,125 - Yeah. I mean, even toward the end, when he couldn't... 770 00:47:47,250 --> 00:47:49,959 express his affection the way most guys do, 771 00:47:50,041 --> 00:47:52,458 he would still come in here just to talk. 772 00:47:52,542 --> 00:47:54,000 - Wait a minute. 773 00:47:54,083 --> 00:47:57,458 You knew he was sick and you didn't tell me?! 774 00:47:58,625 --> 00:48:01,417 - Client-dancer confidentiality, you taught me that. 775 00:48:01,500 --> 00:48:04,208 - Don't worry about it. I'm his kid and he didn't even tell me. 776 00:48:04,291 --> 00:48:07,250 It's not like he's... a decent human being in any way. 777 00:48:07,333 --> 00:48:08,500 - Hey! 778 00:48:08,583 --> 00:48:11,208 Shut your mouth. 779 00:48:11,291 --> 00:48:14,083 - It's okay. It's okay... 780 00:48:16,834 --> 00:48:18,208 - Hey, I'm sorry. 781 00:48:18,291 --> 00:48:21,959 I mean, he wasn't the greatest guy all the time, but... 782 00:48:22,041 --> 00:48:24,125 you know, we all have our faults. 783 00:48:25,083 --> 00:48:26,250 - Did you guys...? 784 00:48:26,792 --> 00:48:29,041 - A long time ago. 785 00:48:29,875 --> 00:48:31,750 - Guesstimate for me. 786 00:48:31,834 --> 00:48:34,125 - 20 years... 787 00:48:34,208 --> 00:48:36,458 The 90's are a little fuzzy for me. 788 00:48:36,542 --> 00:48:39,166 - Before or after my parents split up? 789 00:48:40,208 --> 00:48:41,542 - Hey, I'm sorry, kid. 790 00:48:41,625 --> 00:48:44,083 I didn't pull the ripcord on your parents' marriage. 791 00:48:44,959 --> 00:48:47,333 I was just one of the many spots he landed. 792 00:48:47,417 --> 00:48:51,166 Jesus! He was a charmer. 793 00:48:52,041 --> 00:48:55,125 You know, on our first date, he bought this little stuffed bear. 794 00:48:55,959 --> 00:48:59,041 God, we got shit-faced and ended up in a tattoo parlour! 795 00:48:59,125 --> 00:49:00,500 Oh, no, no, that's okay. - That's it. 796 00:49:00,583 --> 00:49:02,166 - Yep, there it is. 797 00:49:03,083 --> 00:49:07,083 - I was a tight piece of ass back then. 798 00:49:07,166 --> 00:49:08,875 - Oh, yeah, she was. 799 00:49:08,959 --> 00:49:10,750 I saw a VHS evidence tape of her once. 800 00:49:10,834 --> 00:49:13,000 - Your dad... 801 00:49:13,083 --> 00:49:16,125 He could treat a lady like a f-ing lady! 802 00:49:20,500 --> 00:49:22,375 - Aw... 803 00:49:22,834 --> 00:49:24,291 Don't be blue. 804 00:49:26,041 --> 00:49:28,542 - I'm okay. - He's fine, he's fine. 805 00:49:28,625 --> 00:49:31,291 - No, look at him. He's all frowny. 806 00:49:32,333 --> 00:49:35,458 - Yeah, that's just the way my face kind of sits. 807 00:49:37,417 --> 00:49:39,458 - Let's see what you inherited from your old man. 808 00:49:39,542 --> 00:49:40,834 - Huh? 809 00:49:40,917 --> 00:49:42,917 It's okay, thank you. I'm sorry. 810 00:49:44,333 --> 00:49:45,583 - I got it, I got it. 811 00:49:52,333 --> 00:49:54,208 Hey, you alright? 812 00:49:54,291 --> 00:49:55,542 You didn't go hair-trigger, did you? 813 00:49:56,458 --> 00:49:58,625 - This is all some big fucking joke to you, huh? 814 00:49:58,709 --> 00:50:01,041 Hey, I know what'd be funny, 815 00:50:01,125 --> 00:50:05,417 is if the stripper that used to jerk off my buddy Andy, jerked off his son too! 816 00:50:05,500 --> 00:50:06,875 Oh, you know what'd be even better? 817 00:50:06,959 --> 00:50:10,959 Is if that same stripper knew that he was dying before even I did. 818 00:50:11,041 --> 00:50:13,208 - Technically, you never even knew he was dying, so-- 819 00:50:13,291 --> 00:50:13,750 - No, technically, he's an asshole. 820 00:50:13,834 --> 00:50:16,208 - A complex asshole. 821 00:50:16,291 --> 00:50:18,291 - A complex asshole who left my mom for a stripper. 822 00:50:18,375 --> 00:50:20,792 - And who cared about the juvenile justice system. 823 00:50:20,875 --> 00:50:22,583 - For a stripper's kid. 824 00:50:22,667 --> 00:50:26,291 - You're obsessed with the erotic arts, aren't you? 825 00:50:30,208 --> 00:50:31,417 - Hello? 826 00:50:31,500 --> 00:50:33,959 - Son of a bitch! If you came in town 827 00:50:34,041 --> 00:50:35,542 and didn't tell me, I'll fucking kill you. 828 00:50:35,625 --> 00:50:36,125 - Cam! 829 00:50:36,208 --> 00:50:40,333 What's up, man? Uh... 830 00:50:40,417 --> 00:50:43,834 Sorry I didn't call you. I'm here for my dad's funeral. 831 00:50:43,917 --> 00:50:45,625 - Oh... sorry for your loss. 832 00:50:45,709 --> 00:50:48,208 Is that what people say? 833 00:50:48,291 --> 00:50:49,208 - That's about all they say. 834 00:50:49,291 --> 00:50:52,458 How did you... how did you know I was here? 835 00:50:52,542 --> 00:50:54,500 - Your wife and my wife started Facebooking after the wedding. 836 00:50:54,583 --> 00:50:58,000 And she just posted some diaper pick, and blah, blah, blah... 837 00:50:58,083 --> 00:50:59,625 Who gives a shit? Come over tonight, meet the child. 838 00:50:59,709 --> 00:51:03,041 See how your life will be boned for the next 18 years. 839 00:51:03,125 --> 00:51:06,875 - Well, as tempting as that sounds, I think I'm gonna have to catch the red-eye back, so... 840 00:51:06,959 --> 00:51:09,125 - Fuck you, motherfucker. 841 00:51:09,208 --> 00:51:11,041 Come over, I'm texting you the address, 7 o'clock. 842 00:51:11,125 --> 00:51:13,834 Bring anything and die. - Alright. 843 00:51:13,917 --> 00:51:15,375 - Also, I'm sorry I said "die". 844 00:51:15,458 --> 00:51:17,417 Later, asshole. 845 00:51:19,792 --> 00:51:22,291 - An old friend. 846 00:51:23,041 --> 00:51:24,250 So... 847 00:51:24,333 --> 00:51:26,291 I guess that's it. 848 00:51:27,333 --> 00:51:29,542 I'll just send you the picture when I get it. 849 00:51:31,083 --> 00:51:32,333 - I guess so. 850 00:51:35,041 --> 00:51:35,792 - Just contact me... 851 00:51:35,875 --> 00:51:39,542 when the estate settles. 852 00:51:43,291 --> 00:51:45,125 Nice meeting you. 853 00:51:45,208 --> 00:51:46,709 - You too. 854 00:51:49,667 --> 00:51:50,375 - You're going back in? 855 00:51:52,208 --> 00:51:55,542 - We all grieve in our own way, Ken. 856 00:51:57,542 --> 00:51:59,375 We all grieve in our own way. 857 00:52:08,750 --> 00:52:10,041 - 'Cause you'll be the person that'll be handling this. 858 00:52:10,125 --> 00:52:12,250 I mean, I can't, you know, leave it up to my-- 859 00:52:12,333 --> 00:52:14,542 And there he is! 860 00:52:14,625 --> 00:52:15,250 Lori, I'll be right back. 861 00:52:17,291 --> 00:52:18,417 It rang and I picked up. 862 00:52:20,417 --> 00:52:22,083 - Hello. 863 00:52:22,166 --> 00:52:24,291 - How did it go? - Uh... 864 00:52:24,375 --> 00:52:28,166 Good, good. I got a guy dumping him as we speak. 865 00:52:28,250 --> 00:52:31,417 You got a guy, huh? 866 00:52:31,500 --> 00:52:34,250 - Yeah, you know. I got... I found an ash-dumping guy. 867 00:52:34,333 --> 00:52:35,458 - Impressive. 868 00:52:35,542 --> 00:52:39,125 Daddy's coming home! Yay! 869 00:52:39,208 --> 00:52:42,625 Oh, hi! There he is. 870 00:52:45,667 --> 00:52:47,333 Hi! There's my... child. 871 00:52:47,417 --> 00:52:50,709 So, what were you and my mom talking about? 872 00:52:50,792 --> 00:52:55,166 - Your mom went to some holistic funeral home 873 00:52:55,250 --> 00:52:57,583 and came back with a bunch of pamphlets. 874 00:52:57,667 --> 00:52:59,250 I think she's really bored. 875 00:52:59,333 --> 00:53:01,166 - Well... - So, Lori, 876 00:53:01,250 --> 00:53:03,083 the sandalwood one 877 00:53:03,166 --> 00:53:06,250 is 80% post-consumer fibre. 878 00:53:06,333 --> 00:53:08,583 - Mom, what are you doing? You're in perfect health. 879 00:53:08,667 --> 00:53:11,083 - I know. But there's nothing wrong with preparing 880 00:53:11,166 --> 00:53:14,375 for the inevitable transition into the next realm of existence. 881 00:53:14,458 --> 00:53:17,792 So the super-eco option... - I think she's talking about Florida. 882 00:53:17,875 --> 00:53:21,417 - ...which seems better than the mushroom death suit. 883 00:53:21,500 --> 00:53:24,375 Let me show. I'll be right back. - Nobody likes the mushroom death suit. 884 00:53:24,458 --> 00:53:26,417 20 minutes of that. 885 00:53:26,500 --> 00:53:29,041 Is she gonna be okay? - Yeah, yeah. 886 00:53:29,125 --> 00:53:30,667 She'll be fine. 887 00:53:30,750 --> 00:53:33,667 I'll just remove all the sharp objects before I come home. 888 00:53:33,750 --> 00:53:36,458 - What time does your flight land? - Uh... 889 00:53:36,542 --> 00:53:40,208 Actually, I'm gonna hop on the first flight tomorrow morning. 890 00:53:40,291 --> 00:53:43,667 - Tomorrow? What happened to tonight? 891 00:53:43,750 --> 00:53:44,875 - Well, Cam called. 892 00:53:44,959 --> 00:53:47,083 So I thought I'd, you know, since I'm here already, 893 00:53:47,166 --> 00:53:48,625 I'd swing by, 894 00:53:48,709 --> 00:53:50,583 maybe get some new dad tips. 895 00:53:50,667 --> 00:53:55,458 - Here's a dad tip, come hang out with your actual family. 896 00:53:55,542 --> 00:53:59,417 - Okay. Just, can we not... it's just been a long, 897 00:53:59,500 --> 00:54:00,792 weird, stressful day. 898 00:54:00,875 --> 00:54:03,583 - Oh, it's been stressful for you? 899 00:54:03,667 --> 00:54:06,291 I'm so sorry to hear that. No stress over here by the way. 900 00:54:06,375 --> 00:54:08,750 This kid kind of raises himself. 901 00:54:08,834 --> 00:54:10,500 I just leave out some Kibble 902 00:54:10,583 --> 00:54:12,333 and figured I'd check back in before college. 903 00:54:12,417 --> 00:54:15,125 - So now, we're using the kid as a weapon? 904 00:54:15,208 --> 00:54:18,333 - No, not until his skull firms up. 905 00:54:18,834 --> 00:54:21,250 I know you're dealing with a lot of stuff, Ken, 906 00:54:21,333 --> 00:54:22,750 but I could really use a hand, 907 00:54:22,834 --> 00:54:24,792 and you're off tearing it up with your homies. 908 00:54:24,875 --> 00:54:27,250 - I'm not tearing it up with anybody! 909 00:54:27,333 --> 00:54:29,458 I have no homies to tear it up with. I don't know what you're taking about. 910 00:54:29,542 --> 00:54:30,458 Okay? You said it was fine. So I came. 911 00:54:30,542 --> 00:54:33,417 It's okay. It's alright. 912 00:54:33,500 --> 00:54:35,333 - It's just an extra 12 hours. You'll be fine. Call Trent 913 00:54:35,417 --> 00:54:37,375 and have him come over and take his shirt off. 914 00:54:37,458 --> 00:54:40,709 - Yeah. You caught us. That's why I'm so exhausted. 915 00:54:40,792 --> 00:54:42,000 Just been gay-fucking 916 00:54:42,083 --> 00:54:43,875 his gay brains out all over our gay fucking apartment. 917 00:54:43,959 --> 00:54:46,542 It's just a peg-a-palooza out here. - Okay, okay, alright. 918 00:54:46,625 --> 00:54:49,333 - Thank God I rush-ordered that big, fat strap-on! 919 00:54:49,417 --> 00:54:51,875 - Please, would you lower your voice! 920 00:54:53,625 --> 00:54:56,542 - Well, you know, at least someone's getting some action. 921 00:54:56,625 --> 00:54:58,667 - It took 16 hours to push 922 00:54:58,750 --> 00:55:01,333 our little bowling ball of love out of my fucking vagina. 923 00:55:01,417 --> 00:55:04,542 And you wonder why I'm not in the mood? 924 00:55:04,625 --> 00:55:06,709 - Okay. I regretted that 925 00:55:06,792 --> 00:55:09,500 the moment that I said it, but, you know, it has been six months. 926 00:55:09,583 --> 00:55:11,250 - You didn't want to fuck a pregnant lady! 927 00:55:11,333 --> 00:55:13,667 Oh, see? Now, he's crying. 928 00:55:13,750 --> 00:55:15,959 It's okay. - Shh, shh... It's okay. 929 00:55:16,041 --> 00:55:19,250 - It's okay. Sorry. 930 00:55:19,333 --> 00:55:21,583 Do you have to feed him? 931 00:55:21,667 --> 00:55:23,417 - Yeah. But you know what? 932 00:55:23,500 --> 00:55:26,750 Good news, left tit stopped bleeding today. So... 933 00:55:26,834 --> 00:55:28,208 - Lori, hold... 934 00:55:28,542 --> 00:55:31,125 - So, this one seems really interesting. 935 00:55:31,208 --> 00:55:32,500 This is the funeral pyre. 936 00:55:32,583 --> 00:55:35,291 The only problem is it is weather dependent. 937 00:55:35,375 --> 00:55:38,834 - She's gone, mom. She's not there anymore. 938 00:55:41,333 --> 00:55:43,291 - Sorry for the mess. 939 00:55:43,375 --> 00:55:46,834 - No. It's like seeing into my future. 940 00:55:46,917 --> 00:55:50,583 - Yeah, well, hopefully, yours isn't a bile-spewing monster like ours is. 941 00:55:50,667 --> 00:55:51,917 - Yeah. 942 00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:54,250 - Hey, to your dad. - Yeah. 943 00:55:54,333 --> 00:55:55,959 My dad... 944 00:55:56,458 --> 00:55:58,458 You know, he... 945 00:55:58,542 --> 00:56:01,250 He used to take flying lessons. 946 00:56:01,333 --> 00:56:03,000 - How the fuck would I know that? 947 00:56:03,083 --> 00:56:07,709 - I don't know. I just found out that... uh... 948 00:56:07,792 --> 00:56:11,166 he wanted to be a pilot when he was younger. 949 00:56:11,250 --> 00:56:13,417 - Huh... Why'd he stop? 950 00:56:13,917 --> 00:56:16,417 - Not a hot clue. 951 00:56:16,917 --> 00:56:20,500 - You know, when my grandfather died, my grandma found all these like, 952 00:56:20,583 --> 00:56:21,250 men's "bodybuilding" magazines. 953 00:56:21,333 --> 00:56:23,709 - Are you serious? - Yeah. 954 00:56:23,792 --> 00:56:26,458 I'm only here because of intolerance in the '50s. 955 00:56:26,542 --> 00:56:29,041 - Interesting. - You never really know anyone. 956 00:56:31,583 --> 00:56:33,583 Did you ever open that bar? 957 00:56:33,667 --> 00:56:33,959 - Gastropub. 958 00:56:34,041 --> 00:56:35,458 Brew pub. 959 00:56:35,542 --> 00:56:39,959 I'm still kind of trying to decide between... 960 00:56:40,792 --> 00:56:42,041 Although they're both so trendy now. I probably missed the bus. 961 00:56:42,125 --> 00:56:44,208 - Parenthood... 962 00:56:44,291 --> 00:56:45,083 where your plans go to die. 963 00:56:45,166 --> 00:56:48,375 - A hospice for your dreams. 964 00:56:48,458 --> 00:56:50,542 - Palliative care for your balls. 965 00:56:50,625 --> 00:56:52,667 At least then, you have an excuse, right? 966 00:56:53,417 --> 00:56:55,417 Oh, it's my neighbour. 967 00:56:55,500 --> 00:56:58,250 Tracey! Come meet one of the assholes I went to college with! 968 00:56:58,333 --> 00:57:00,792 - You make it sound so tempting. 969 00:57:00,875 --> 00:57:03,709 - This is Ken. Ken, Tracey. Tracey, Ken. 970 00:57:03,792 --> 00:57:05,792 - Nice to meet you. 971 00:57:05,875 --> 00:57:07,375 - College, huh? 972 00:57:07,458 --> 00:57:09,375 Same sorority? 973 00:57:09,458 --> 00:57:11,709 Oh, enjoy your humour. 974 00:57:11,792 --> 00:57:14,667 Why don't you ask your pimp if you can come over for a beer? 975 00:57:15,959 --> 00:57:17,667 Rude. 976 00:57:17,750 --> 00:57:21,000 She's not really a hooker, but she did just get divorced. 977 00:57:21,083 --> 00:57:22,667 - That's too bad. - Too bad for him. 978 00:57:22,750 --> 00:57:27,500 I heard them a few times. She's... enthusiastic. 979 00:57:27,583 --> 00:57:31,750 - That's kind of... cliché, isn't it, the horny divorcee? 980 00:57:31,834 --> 00:57:35,000 - Buddy, all clichés are true. That's just science. 981 00:57:35,083 --> 00:57:36,750 Anne doesn't really trust her. 982 00:57:36,834 --> 00:57:39,041 It kind of makes it hotter for me. 983 00:57:40,959 --> 00:57:42,125 - Hmm. - What? Good news? 984 00:57:42,208 --> 00:57:44,375 - Uh... Yeah. 985 00:57:44,458 --> 00:57:47,709 It's about my dad's... affairs. 986 00:57:47,792 --> 00:57:50,208 Cam, can you help? Sorry, Ken. 987 00:57:50,291 --> 00:57:51,500 - Oh, did he-- - Yeah, yeah. 988 00:57:51,583 --> 00:57:52,500 And then, he-- 989 00:57:52,583 --> 00:57:55,500 - Alright, get the thing and I'll... 990 00:57:56,583 --> 00:57:59,542 Hey. Untouched by the lips of man. 991 00:57:59,625 --> 00:58:01,542 - Know that feeling. 992 00:58:05,500 --> 00:58:06,834 - Here, you need help there, buddy? 993 00:58:06,917 --> 00:58:09,917 - Yeah, I need help getting in my own house. Fuck off. 994 00:58:10,000 --> 00:58:11,917 - Geez. 995 00:58:12,917 --> 00:58:15,291 - Oh, children. - Yeah. 996 00:58:16,917 --> 00:58:19,333 - You got any? - Uh, one, yeah. 997 00:58:19,417 --> 00:58:21,250 You wanna see a picture? 998 00:58:21,333 --> 00:58:22,834 - I'm good. 999 00:58:27,458 --> 00:58:28,917 Do you mind? 1000 00:58:29,000 --> 00:58:31,875 - No, please. It's your... neighbour's house. 1001 00:58:33,417 --> 00:58:36,333 - They occasionally partake. 1002 00:58:37,625 --> 00:58:40,709 - Oh, no. Thanks. I'm married... uh, driving. 1003 00:58:42,375 --> 00:58:43,875 - And a little Freudian. 1004 00:58:45,208 --> 00:58:47,583 - Yeah. 1005 00:58:47,667 --> 00:58:51,917 - I figure weed has prevented more new parents from killing their spawn than any other drug. 1006 00:58:52,000 --> 00:58:53,500 - That sounds about right. 1007 00:58:53,583 --> 00:58:56,709 I bet you acid's probably a parenting non-starter. 1008 00:58:56,792 --> 00:59:00,500 Oh, my kid has fangs! Kill it! 1009 00:59:00,583 --> 00:59:02,458 Kill it! 1010 00:59:02,542 --> 00:59:04,917 - You've never done acid, have you? 1011 00:59:05,000 --> 00:59:06,083 - I have not. 1012 00:59:06,166 --> 00:59:08,917 Although I did buy fake ecstasy at a rave once. 1013 00:59:09,000 --> 00:59:10,750 Cleared my sinuses right up. 1014 00:59:17,333 --> 00:59:19,583 ♪ I'm just passing through I've been doing the do ♪ 1015 00:59:19,667 --> 00:59:22,709 ♪ But I really like some company ♪ 1016 00:59:23,000 --> 00:59:24,625 ♪ So I step to the corner ♪ 1017 00:59:24,709 --> 00:59:26,458 ♪ Where the party's made to order ♪ 1018 00:59:26,542 --> 00:59:30,333 ♪ Going down right in front of me ♪ 1019 00:59:30,417 --> 00:59:32,458 ♪ A little smoking A little drinking ♪ 1020 00:59:32,542 --> 00:59:35,667 ♪ More dazin' less digging... ♪ 1021 00:59:49,000 --> 00:59:52,583 - ...moment for posterity. Two college boyfriends. 1022 00:59:52,667 --> 00:59:55,458 Yeah! - Yeah, like old times. 1023 00:59:55,542 --> 00:59:57,917 - No, don't. 1024 00:59:58,000 --> 00:59:58,750 - Photo-bomb, motherfuckers! 1025 00:59:58,834 --> 01:00:00,875 - What? You're ruining our picture! 1026 01:00:00,959 --> 01:00:02,166 - Yeah, she did actually ruin it. 1027 01:00:02,250 --> 01:00:05,542 - Did you get it? Hold on, hold on. Are you okay to drive? 1028 01:00:05,625 --> 01:00:08,208 - Yes, I'm okay. I'm brilliant. Brilliant! 1029 01:00:08,291 --> 01:00:09,166 - Brilliant! 1030 01:00:09,250 --> 01:00:11,166 - But text us when you get home. Alright? 1031 01:00:11,250 --> 01:00:12,792 - Yes, mom. 1032 01:00:12,875 --> 01:00:14,959 - And a big kiss to your wife, 1033 01:00:15,041 --> 01:00:17,834 because she is so awesome. - Aw! 1034 01:00:17,917 --> 01:00:19,667 - Yes, she is. 1035 01:00:19,750 --> 01:00:21,709 - Now, get off my lawn, crazy kids. 1036 01:00:21,792 --> 01:00:25,000 - Thank you. Thank you. - Yes, get out. 1037 01:00:25,083 --> 01:00:27,417 - Man, I needed this. 1038 01:00:28,500 --> 01:00:30,500 - One for the ride. 1039 01:00:30,583 --> 01:00:31,583 - Oh... 1040 01:00:31,667 --> 01:00:34,917 yeah, I don't know. - What? 1041 01:00:35,000 --> 01:00:38,875 You think I'm trying to pass you out and date-rape you? 1042 01:00:38,959 --> 01:00:41,834 - Everybody knows that rape is about power and not about sex. 1043 01:00:41,917 --> 01:00:44,875 - Oh, God! - Wait, wait, wait. 1044 01:00:44,959 --> 01:00:48,041 Okay, one more would be perfection. 1045 01:00:48,125 --> 01:00:49,166 - Only one more. 1046 01:00:49,250 --> 01:00:52,458 Because I wouldn't want the neighbours to talk... 1047 01:00:54,417 --> 01:00:58,583 - Okay, I just should move my car so they don't worry. 1048 01:00:58,667 --> 01:01:01,834 - Oh, look at you, always thinking of others. 1049 01:01:05,542 --> 01:01:07,834 Oh... 1050 01:01:10,750 --> 01:01:11,250 Argh... - What? 1051 01:01:11,333 --> 01:01:13,542 - My boss, 1052 01:01:13,625 --> 01:01:16,667 passive-aggressive ninja. 1053 01:01:16,750 --> 01:01:19,542 - What exactly is it that you do again? 1054 01:01:19,625 --> 01:01:21,458 - Uh... business-to-business marketing 1055 01:01:21,542 --> 01:01:24,542 for a small brewery special... 1056 01:01:24,625 --> 01:01:26,709 Yeah. 1057 01:01:26,792 --> 01:01:29,709 But don't you worry, lady. I got other plans. 1058 01:01:30,542 --> 01:01:33,917 - Why don't you just quit? Now? 1059 01:01:34,000 --> 01:01:36,875 What? 1060 01:01:38,542 --> 01:01:41,083 - Use your largesse to strike out on your own in the world. 1061 01:01:42,667 --> 01:01:43,917 - Yeah, I'm working on it. 1062 01:01:47,041 --> 01:01:48,875 - Wait, what's the word? 1063 01:01:50,792 --> 01:01:51,917 Meow! 1064 01:01:55,583 --> 01:01:57,500 - It's not that easy. 1065 01:01:57,583 --> 01:02:00,375 - I double dog dare you. 1066 01:02:00,458 --> 01:02:02,583 - Are you kidding? 1067 01:02:03,750 --> 01:02:07,000 There's like, stuff that I've-- 1068 01:02:07,083 --> 01:02:09,959 - I triple triple... triple dog dare you. 1069 01:02:12,458 --> 01:02:15,625 - Well, now it's fucking on. That last dog just, you know... 1070 01:02:15,709 --> 01:02:17,000 - Just put you over the edge. 1071 01:02:20,583 --> 01:02:22,625 - Hi, we're not here right now-- 1072 01:02:22,709 --> 01:02:24,750 - Oh, went straight to voice mail. 1073 01:02:24,834 --> 01:02:27,875 - Scorch the earth, motherfucker. 1074 01:02:31,542 --> 01:02:35,166 - Hey, it's Ken. 1075 01:02:35,250 --> 01:02:36,959 Wall, uh... 1076 01:02:39,000 --> 01:02:41,000 About that PowerPoint, I'm not gonna... 1077 01:02:41,083 --> 01:02:43,959 I'm not gonna get to do it because... 1078 01:02:45,625 --> 01:02:47,834 I quit. 1079 01:02:47,917 --> 01:02:49,000 Yeah. 1080 01:02:51,333 --> 01:02:53,041 Uh... I quit. So, uh... 1081 01:02:55,583 --> 01:02:57,250 And someone should probably tell you this, but... 1082 01:02:57,333 --> 01:03:01,875 The way you micromanage the entire business makes everyone hate you 1083 01:03:01,959 --> 01:03:04,000 and wastes the company a ton of money. 1084 01:03:04,083 --> 01:03:07,166 And also, stop with the fucking hugging! Uh... oh, yeah. 1085 01:03:07,250 --> 01:03:09,792 And also, an aneurysm is not a disease, 1086 01:03:09,875 --> 01:03:12,792 so you can't have a fun run for it. 1087 01:03:12,875 --> 01:03:14,041 So, alright, uh... 1088 01:03:15,583 --> 01:03:17,917 - Yes! - Oh! 1089 01:03:18,000 --> 01:03:19,917 - How does it feel? - Fuck! 1090 01:03:20,000 --> 01:03:22,041 Like I'm gonna throw up? 1091 01:03:22,125 --> 01:03:23,291 Do you have any water? 1092 01:03:23,375 --> 01:03:26,000 - Yeah. 1093 01:03:40,125 --> 01:03:43,709 So how is the wifey gonna feel about this? 1094 01:03:43,792 --> 01:03:46,083 - She can't get any madder than she already is, so... 1095 01:03:46,166 --> 01:03:47,792 Yeah. 1096 01:03:47,875 --> 01:03:50,625 Before I left, she asked me if I was dead inside. 1097 01:03:54,542 --> 01:03:55,041 - Are you? 1098 01:03:57,500 --> 01:04:00,667 - Uh... I mean... 1099 01:04:01,333 --> 01:04:03,583 There's all these feelings 1100 01:04:03,667 --> 01:04:07,083 that I am supposed to have as a new dad. 1101 01:04:09,500 --> 01:04:12,875 And I want to feel them. 1102 01:04:22,208 --> 01:04:27,875 My wife is actually a really amazing woman. 1103 01:04:32,333 --> 01:04:34,291 - Yet you're sitting here drinking with a strange woman late at night. 1104 01:04:34,375 --> 01:04:36,208 - Yeah. 1105 01:04:39,625 --> 01:04:42,792 - You know, Ken, marriage isn't a "one size fits all" situation. 1106 01:04:42,875 --> 01:04:44,959 - Does that mean I should be a Mormon? 1107 01:04:46,750 --> 01:04:48,917 - Maybe what you need is a one-off. 1108 01:04:55,875 --> 01:04:59,083 And just so you know, she never has to. 1109 01:05:25,291 --> 01:05:26,375 - Hey! 1110 01:05:26,458 --> 01:05:28,667 - Hey, Jeff. What are you doing here? 1111 01:05:28,750 --> 01:05:29,959 - You know, I called you, like, 50 times. 1112 01:05:30,041 --> 01:05:33,041 I figured some hood rat must've popped you. 1113 01:05:33,125 --> 01:05:35,333 I mean, the crime rate these days is-- 1114 01:05:35,417 --> 01:05:37,208 - Actually way down. So-- 1115 01:05:37,291 --> 01:05:39,750 - So he called my number. Sounds like karma. 1116 01:05:39,834 --> 01:05:43,000 - Or directory assistance. 1117 01:05:43,083 --> 01:05:45,166 - Do you realize I haven't seen Jeff in 20 years? 1118 01:05:45,250 --> 01:05:49,250 - Really? So back to my original question. 1119 01:05:49,333 --> 01:05:51,959 - Little wrinkle with your escape plan, Jacko. 1120 01:05:53,000 --> 01:05:55,333 Your janitor friend... is lying. 1121 01:05:55,417 --> 01:05:57,166 - So exciting. 1122 01:05:57,250 --> 01:05:59,709 It's just like an episode of Law and Order. 1123 01:05:59,792 --> 01:06:03,083 The original one. I don't care for the sexual assaults. 1124 01:06:03,166 --> 01:06:06,250 Anybody wants some wine? - Does a rabbi work for tips? 1125 01:06:06,333 --> 01:06:08,709 Take a look at the grass. You see what I mean? 1126 01:06:08,792 --> 01:06:10,792 - Yeah. Now that it's bigger. 1127 01:06:10,875 --> 01:06:13,208 - And the ashes. - Wrong colour. 1128 01:06:13,291 --> 01:06:16,083 Andy was more light gray. - Your mom has a keen eye. 1129 01:06:16,166 --> 01:06:18,250 - Why would he do that? - Well, that is the question. 1130 01:06:18,333 --> 01:06:21,208 What was the particular make of your janitor? 1131 01:06:21,291 --> 01:06:22,250 Make? 1132 01:06:22,333 --> 01:06:23,959 - Oh, come on, Mr. PC. 1133 01:06:24,041 --> 01:06:25,166 Was he a recent arrival to our fair country? 1134 01:06:25,250 --> 01:06:28,625 Did he have a preponderance of consonants in his name? 1135 01:06:28,709 --> 01:06:31,917 Was he wearing a head covering that was religious and not decorative in nature? 1136 01:06:32,000 --> 01:06:33,166 - Jeff, you're so verbal! 1137 01:06:33,250 --> 01:06:36,834 - Yeah, a verbal racist. Oh, what are we gonna do? 1138 01:06:36,917 --> 01:06:39,709 - Well, I'll tell you what... 1139 01:06:39,792 --> 01:06:42,041 you call him and you tell him... 1140 01:06:42,834 --> 01:06:44,709 I don't know what you tell him. 1141 01:06:44,792 --> 01:06:46,166 You tell him you need the box back for insurance purposes. 1142 01:06:46,250 --> 01:06:49,750 Then, we get his locale, we go pay him a visit. 1143 01:06:49,834 --> 01:06:51,250 - Excellent idea. - Thank you, lady Eve. 1144 01:06:53,709 --> 01:06:56,041 - Okay, okay. 1145 01:06:56,125 --> 01:06:59,875 I can't think about this right now. I gotta go to sleep. 1146 01:07:00,333 --> 01:07:03,250 Thanks for the info. We'll figure it out tomorrow. 1147 01:07:03,333 --> 01:07:05,208 I'm gonna crash. 1148 01:07:07,083 --> 01:07:09,166 - Good night. - Yeah. 1149 01:07:09,500 --> 01:07:11,417 - Okay, well, I guess... 1150 01:07:11,500 --> 01:07:13,250 I guess I should mosey. 1151 01:07:15,500 --> 01:07:17,375 - Yeah, it's late. 1152 01:07:22,041 --> 01:07:26,083 So how's your night vision? - I get by. 1153 01:07:26,750 --> 01:07:28,458 - I bet you do. 1154 01:07:29,083 --> 01:07:30,792 - You know, I remember when we first met, 1155 01:07:30,875 --> 01:07:33,875 it was... a wedding at the club. 1156 01:07:33,959 --> 01:07:36,458 And Andy pointed you out to me and I thought: Oh, my God. 1157 01:07:37,291 --> 01:07:39,000 That was my best friend's ex-wife. - Stop. 1158 01:07:39,083 --> 01:07:41,250 - You were wearing that little blue dress 1159 01:07:41,333 --> 01:07:43,583 with a button at the top that just wouldn't stay 1160 01:07:43,667 --> 01:07:45,250 buttoned. 1161 01:07:47,583 --> 01:07:50,208 Oh! 1162 01:07:57,875 --> 01:08:00,667 - Hey. - Good morning, sleepyhead. 1163 01:08:00,750 --> 01:08:03,125 - How you doing? 1164 01:08:03,208 --> 01:08:04,834 - Amazing. 1165 01:08:04,917 --> 01:08:06,792 Your son actually slept through the night. 1166 01:08:06,875 --> 01:08:08,375 - Oh, good. 1167 01:08:08,458 --> 01:08:10,959 - Unlike someone who looks a bit rough. 1168 01:08:11,041 --> 01:08:14,500 - Yeah, I didn't get the... 1169 01:08:14,583 --> 01:08:16,333 best sleep, so... 1170 01:08:16,417 --> 01:08:19,500 - Yeah, did your new friend Tracey keep you up? 1171 01:08:23,834 --> 01:08:25,333 - What? 1172 01:08:25,417 --> 01:08:29,458 - Tall, brunette, looks like a Romanian sex worker. 1173 01:08:29,542 --> 01:08:31,375 - Tracey... Oh, Cam's neighbour. 1174 01:08:31,458 --> 01:08:35,417 Uh, yeah, she stopped by. How did you... 1175 01:08:35,500 --> 01:08:36,875 - Anne posted a photo on Facebook. 1176 01:08:36,959 --> 01:08:39,375 You look nice and toasty. 1177 01:08:39,458 --> 01:08:42,166 - Oh, no, she was... yeah, she was fun. 1178 01:08:42,250 --> 01:08:46,125 It was, I mean, it was good to see Cam and... 1179 01:08:46,208 --> 01:08:47,083 - It looked like fun 1180 01:08:47,166 --> 01:08:51,500 and I'm glad you got to... go out. 1181 01:08:54,125 --> 01:08:56,875 Sorry I haven't been really fun lately. 1182 01:08:56,959 --> 01:09:00,125 - No, no. I'm the one in my own universe. 1183 01:09:00,208 --> 01:09:03,041 I was such an asshole. I'm sorry. 1184 01:09:03,125 --> 01:09:06,000 - No. I was a total bitch. - No, I was the bitch. 1185 01:09:06,083 --> 01:09:10,875 I'm a super bitch. 1186 01:09:12,458 --> 01:09:15,250 - Speaking of bitches, your boss called last night 1187 01:09:15,333 --> 01:09:18,792 and left a weird message on our machine. 1188 01:09:18,875 --> 01:09:20,125 - Fuck. 1189 01:09:20,625 --> 01:09:22,250 I mean... okay. 1190 01:09:22,333 --> 01:09:25,083 - Hey, so when's your flight? - Uh... 1191 01:09:25,166 --> 01:09:28,291 Hold on one second. 1192 01:09:28,625 --> 01:09:30,166 Where are you? 1193 01:09:31,542 --> 01:09:33,834 Oh, sweetie, I gotta get this real quick. 1194 01:09:33,917 --> 01:09:36,750 - Sure, sure. If it's my new sister wife, tell her I said, "Whaddup!" 1195 01:09:36,834 --> 01:09:37,583 - Ha-ha-ha. Not funny. 1196 01:09:37,667 --> 01:09:40,083 I love you. 1197 01:09:40,166 --> 01:09:41,959 - Alright, "shame spiral". Get some coffee. 1198 01:09:42,041 --> 01:09:42,417 - Okay, bye. 1199 01:09:44,291 --> 01:09:45,834 Hey, this is Ken. 1200 01:09:45,917 --> 01:09:47,959 Yeah. 1201 01:09:48,041 --> 01:09:50,208 Yes, the one with the ashes. 1202 01:09:51,417 --> 01:09:54,000 Do you have other people that have ashes? 1203 01:10:19,959 --> 01:10:21,208 Jeff? 1204 01:10:24,208 --> 01:10:26,000 - Hey. 1205 01:10:26,083 --> 01:10:27,959 - What... Didn't you get my text? 1206 01:10:28,041 --> 01:10:29,041 We're supposed to meet there. 1207 01:10:29,125 --> 01:10:32,250 - Yeah, uh, sorry. Just, uh... 1208 01:10:32,333 --> 01:10:35,333 It's kind of a senior moment. And... 1209 01:10:35,417 --> 01:10:36,458 And I came here. 1210 01:10:43,333 --> 01:10:45,291 Want to car pool? 1211 01:10:45,375 --> 01:10:47,208 - Uh, uh... sure. 1212 01:10:47,291 --> 01:10:50,291 - Yeah, great. Let's go together. 1213 01:10:50,375 --> 01:10:52,667 - Weren't you... Were you wearing that yesterday? 1214 01:10:52,750 --> 01:10:55,291 - No. 1215 01:10:56,583 --> 01:10:59,041 So you just quit over the phone. 1216 01:10:59,125 --> 01:11:01,667 - Yeah, I'm so screwed. 1217 01:11:01,750 --> 01:11:02,959 Lori's gonna kill me. 1218 01:11:03,041 --> 01:11:06,291 To my defense, there was a lot of weed and alcohol involved. 1219 01:11:07,250 --> 01:11:08,667 - Well, if weed and alcohol were a defense, 1220 01:11:08,750 --> 01:11:11,000 I'd be the CEO of Halliburton right now. 1221 01:11:11,083 --> 01:11:14,125 Don't sweat it, kid. If Andy's ashes are in there, we'll make it right. 1222 01:11:15,208 --> 01:11:16,625 - Oh. 1223 01:11:18,667 --> 01:11:21,083 Hey. 1224 01:11:21,166 --> 01:11:22,375 Who's the nut? 1225 01:11:23,166 --> 01:11:26,667 - Uh, this is my friend, Jeff. 1226 01:11:29,166 --> 01:11:31,667 - Hi. - Nice to meet you. 1227 01:11:31,750 --> 01:11:33,458 - Nice to meet you. 1228 01:11:35,125 --> 01:11:37,875 20 bucks for my time, eh? - Yeah. 1229 01:11:37,959 --> 01:11:41,291 - Okay, come on in! 1230 01:11:46,291 --> 01:11:48,125 - Wow. Nice. 1231 01:11:53,792 --> 01:11:57,041 : Yeah, so about that photo you sent... 1232 01:11:57,125 --> 01:11:59,709 Yeah, it's tough to do a selfie 1233 01:11:59,792 --> 01:12:01,750 with a dead body, or a bag, I guess. 1234 01:12:01,834 --> 01:12:03,458 - Yeah. 1235 01:12:03,542 --> 01:12:06,667 Yeah, I don't think you'd actually know. 1236 01:12:11,417 --> 01:12:13,333 - I don't follow. 1237 01:12:13,417 --> 01:12:15,208 - You see, the... 1238 01:12:15,291 --> 01:12:18,583 the field in that photo 1239 01:12:18,667 --> 01:12:21,291 was the wrong colour. 1240 01:12:21,375 --> 01:12:23,375 Astroturf has... 1241 01:12:24,250 --> 01:12:26,333 has a certain blue-ish hue to it. 1242 01:12:26,417 --> 01:12:30,041 And... 1243 01:12:31,041 --> 01:12:33,166 unlike the... 1244 01:12:33,250 --> 01:12:35,417 yard of a dog owner, 1245 01:12:35,500 --> 01:12:38,208 there's not any brown spots where the dog... 1246 01:12:38,291 --> 01:12:39,625 - Shits. 1247 01:12:39,709 --> 01:12:42,458 And the consistency of the alleged ashes 1248 01:12:42,542 --> 01:12:45,583 reminds one of say, litter of the kitty. 1249 01:12:48,250 --> 01:12:50,083 - Man, I'm sorry. 1250 01:12:50,166 --> 01:12:52,291 I was gonna do it, but they got cameras all over the stadium. 1251 01:12:52,375 --> 01:12:55,667 - Just tell me you still have the ashes. 1252 01:12:55,750 --> 01:12:58,417 - I actually was gonna just put them in the yard, 1253 01:12:58,500 --> 01:13:00,458 but this is a human being we're talking about, 1254 01:13:00,542 --> 01:13:02,625 a person who lived, who loved-- 1255 01:13:02,709 --> 01:13:05,625 - Yeah, who pooped and cried. Yeah, we get it. Where's our pen salesman? 1256 01:13:05,709 --> 01:13:07,417 - My wife and I thought we should put him in a cemetery. 1257 01:13:07,500 --> 01:13:09,375 There's a big tree by where my Nana's buried. 1258 01:13:09,458 --> 01:13:12,291 We go up there every other week. 1259 01:13:12,375 --> 01:13:15,333 - The remains, mop-jockey, Jesus H. - Sorry, they gotta be here! 1260 01:13:17,667 --> 01:13:18,625 - Ask for your money back. 1261 01:13:20,709 --> 01:13:22,667 - Yeah, he meant well. 1262 01:13:22,750 --> 01:13:24,625 - Well, okay, but it kind of sets a precedent. 1263 01:13:25,875 --> 01:13:28,542 - For what? 1264 01:13:28,625 --> 01:13:31,417 Unlawful dumping of human remains? 1265 01:13:34,417 --> 01:13:37,625 - Hey, is your mom always so... 1266 01:13:37,709 --> 01:13:40,750 ...obsessed with death? No, that's a new thing. 1267 01:13:40,834 --> 01:13:42,250 - I was gonna say "forward". 1268 01:13:42,333 --> 01:13:45,000 - What are you talking about? 1269 01:13:45,083 --> 01:13:47,166 - Ah, forget it, then. 1270 01:13:47,250 --> 01:13:49,458 I just wonder if I need a trip to the clinic. 1271 01:13:53,583 --> 01:13:54,625 - Did you... 1272 01:13:55,583 --> 01:13:56,834 Wait, after I... 1273 01:13:56,917 --> 01:13:58,000 Did you fuck my mom? 1274 01:13:58,083 --> 01:14:01,083 - Hey, I told you, man. We all grieve in our own way. 1275 01:14:01,166 --> 01:14:04,333 - No, I bet very few of us grieve by sleeping with my mother, 1276 01:14:04,417 --> 01:14:06,125 and then, worrying that they have STDs. 1277 01:14:06,208 --> 01:14:07,583 - Ken, cool your jets! I'm not gonna start calling you "son". 1278 01:14:07,667 --> 01:14:10,583 You don't have to buy me a card on Father's Day. 1279 01:14:10,667 --> 01:14:12,875 We're not gonna go have a catch. 1280 01:14:12,959 --> 01:14:15,291 But, by the way, there was very little sleeping going on, if you follow. 1281 01:14:15,375 --> 01:14:17,625 - Got it! 1282 01:14:17,709 --> 01:14:22,500 I put the bag in an empty cereal box, but that's where we normally keep the kitty litter. 1283 01:14:22,583 --> 01:14:26,417 So I'm thinking the wife. She's at work right now, but she's-- 1284 01:14:26,500 --> 01:14:27,542 - For the love of God, man. 1285 01:14:27,625 --> 01:14:30,667 - They're probably outside in the trash bin. 1286 01:14:35,583 --> 01:14:37,750 - Hey, Batman and Robin. 1287 01:14:37,834 --> 01:14:40,125 You still owe me 20 bucks. 1288 01:14:40,208 --> 01:14:41,834 - Hey, hey, wait! 1289 01:14:43,667 --> 01:14:44,625 Hey, hey! 1290 01:14:47,959 --> 01:14:50,834 Hey! Hey! 1291 01:14:53,208 --> 01:14:55,709 Hey, hey! 1292 01:14:55,792 --> 01:14:57,417 Stop the truck! 1293 01:15:06,583 --> 01:15:08,917 - What the hell is going on? - Sir! 1294 01:15:09,000 --> 01:15:11,750 We need to get into the back of your truck! - For why? 1295 01:15:13,583 --> 01:15:16,625 - There's a baby in there. - Oh, my God! 1296 01:15:16,709 --> 01:15:19,291 - It crawled into a trash bag and fell asleep. 1297 01:15:19,375 --> 01:15:21,291 - Holy shit! Call 9-1-1. 1298 01:15:21,375 --> 01:15:23,458 Call 9-1-1. No baby. There's no baby in there. 1299 01:15:23,542 --> 01:15:24,709 - Well, it's a puppy. A dog baby. 1300 01:15:24,792 --> 01:15:27,875 - There's no puppy. It's not a puppy baby. 1301 01:15:27,959 --> 01:15:31,500 So, this is what a concussion feels like. 1302 01:15:31,583 --> 01:15:35,333 Sir, we just need to get into the back of your truck to retrieve something. 1303 01:15:35,417 --> 01:15:37,583 - This is a storage unit? 1304 01:15:37,667 --> 01:15:40,208 For you to retrieve, there are many regulations. 1305 01:15:40,291 --> 01:15:42,500 - Well, was it regulations you ran down my friend here? 1306 01:15:42,583 --> 01:15:45,834 - What are you accusing me of? - We're not accusing you of anything, sir. 1307 01:15:45,917 --> 01:15:47,792 - Ivan, can I call you Ivan? - Ivan. 1308 01:15:47,875 --> 01:15:50,458 - My Slavic friend, you tell me what I have to do 1309 01:15:50,542 --> 01:15:52,917 to put us in the back of that truck today. 1310 01:15:53,667 --> 01:15:55,959 You guys see the stars? 1311 01:15:57,041 --> 01:16:00,875 - You like that? It won't take us long. - No. 1312 01:16:02,417 --> 01:16:05,041 - Hi! My God, what happened? 1313 01:16:05,125 --> 01:16:08,834 - Mom, what are you doing here? - What?! I don't get a "me" day? 1314 01:16:08,917 --> 01:16:11,083 - Yeah, a little bump on the noggin. He's alright. 1315 01:16:11,166 --> 01:16:12,625 - Did you find Andy? 1316 01:16:12,709 --> 01:16:15,917 - Oh, yeah. He's in the corn flake box. 1317 01:16:16,000 --> 01:16:17,875 Jeff told the garbage man about the dead puppies. 1318 01:16:17,959 --> 01:16:20,458 So now, we're back at square uno. 1319 01:16:20,542 --> 01:16:24,917 - You think you could keep up this spacey looking, drooling idiot bit a little while longer? 1320 01:16:25,000 --> 01:16:26,542 - I think I have an actual head injury. 1321 01:16:26,625 --> 01:16:29,625 I should probably go to the hospital. 1322 01:16:29,709 --> 01:16:31,834 - Kids, these days. 1323 01:16:31,917 --> 01:16:34,875 - Your uncle lost a foot in a combine accident once. He never made a peep. 1324 01:16:34,959 --> 01:16:37,917 - Because maybe that's our play. There's a saying in the sales game: 1325 01:16:38,000 --> 01:16:40,667 A man in a good suit can get almost anywhere 1326 01:16:40,750 --> 01:16:42,333 if he walks with confidence. 1327 01:16:42,417 --> 01:16:44,625 - More than anywhere. - Do you know any gimps? 1328 01:16:45,750 --> 01:16:47,125 What, like, otherly gifted. Hello, anybody home? 1329 01:16:47,208 --> 01:16:51,792 - A person with activity limitation is what we call them at work. 1330 01:16:51,875 --> 01:16:53,750 - Okay. - Like his oldest friend, Cam. 1331 01:16:53,834 --> 01:16:55,709 He's been in a wheelchair his whole life. 1332 01:16:55,792 --> 01:16:59,458 - Now, that's the best news I've heard all day. 1333 01:17:01,542 --> 01:17:05,834 - I just want you to know that I know how incredibly offensive this is. 1334 01:17:05,917 --> 01:17:08,959 Just say the word and I won't do it. 1335 01:17:09,917 --> 01:17:13,709 - Good. I'm glad you came to your senses. 1336 01:17:13,792 --> 01:17:16,458 Do you realize how insensitive this is? 1337 01:17:17,667 --> 01:17:19,917 - Yeah, man. I'm sorry. 1338 01:17:20,000 --> 01:17:21,959 I'm just shitting you, man. 1339 01:17:22,041 --> 01:17:24,500 Take it, you fucking wannabe able-ist. 1340 01:17:24,583 --> 01:17:26,834 - Are you serious? - Oh, yeah. No, dude. I love this. 1341 01:17:26,917 --> 01:17:28,250 People are terrified of these things. 1342 01:17:28,333 --> 01:17:32,000 I free-rolled into more concerts than you can imagine. - You have? 1343 01:17:32,083 --> 01:17:32,959 - Young Jeezy. First row. 1344 01:17:33,041 --> 01:17:35,542 He was like, "Get on stage!" I was like, 1345 01:17:35,625 --> 01:17:37,542 "Uh, there's no ramp." But it was like, a nice... 1346 01:17:37,625 --> 01:17:39,875 it was nice of him to invite him. 1347 01:17:39,959 --> 01:17:42,625 Look, I got you this. It might help. 1348 01:17:42,709 --> 01:17:45,792 - What is this? - I'm a fixer, buddy. Solve your problems. 1349 01:17:45,875 --> 01:17:47,917 - You're the best. - That's true. 1350 01:17:48,000 --> 01:17:49,583 - I love you. - Alright, man. Go out there and make me proud. 1351 01:17:49,667 --> 01:17:52,458 - Alright, I will. - Goddamn criminal. 1352 01:17:52,542 --> 01:17:55,375 Remember not to move your legs. 1353 01:17:57,041 --> 01:17:58,041 - Shit... 1354 01:18:00,375 --> 01:18:04,875 - You know, I usually have men bolt out of my house after the fact. 1355 01:18:04,959 --> 01:18:06,333 Not before. 1356 01:18:06,417 --> 01:18:09,583 - Yeah. Sorry about that. 1357 01:18:09,667 --> 01:18:11,041 - It's okay. 1358 01:18:11,125 --> 01:18:14,125 You're a good guy. There's not a lot of you around. 1359 01:18:14,208 --> 01:18:15,542 - Well... 1360 01:18:15,625 --> 01:18:19,750 it was 50-50 there for a second. 1361 01:18:19,834 --> 01:18:20,834 - No, it wasn't. 1362 01:18:20,917 --> 01:18:24,417 Although, you would've had a lot of fun. 1363 01:18:24,500 --> 01:18:27,458 I do a lot of Cirque du Soleil kind of stuff. 1364 01:18:27,542 --> 01:18:29,875 And I'm seriously good at it. 1365 01:18:34,625 --> 01:18:37,542 - Well, that was just mean. 1366 01:18:43,875 --> 01:18:45,750 Pop it, Jeff! 1367 01:18:56,792 --> 01:18:58,917 No, no, that's okay. I got it. 1368 01:18:59,000 --> 01:19:01,542 - God, your mom is so flexible. 1369 01:19:05,792 --> 01:19:09,291 - Okay. You ready? - Almost. 1370 01:19:09,375 --> 01:19:10,917 - Hey! What the fuck? 1371 01:19:15,125 --> 01:19:17,959 - You gotta trust me. God is in the details. 1372 01:19:19,417 --> 01:19:21,583 Just watch and learn. 1373 01:19:25,000 --> 01:19:28,583 Excuse me, young lady, that is a gorgeous blouse. 1374 01:19:28,667 --> 01:19:31,083 Did you know this morning when you got up 1375 01:19:31,166 --> 01:19:32,583 how it would just make your eyes pop? 1376 01:19:32,667 --> 01:19:34,834 - Uh, how can I help you? 1377 01:19:34,917 --> 01:19:38,125 - We are here to see John Travis in special events. 1378 01:19:38,208 --> 01:19:39,375 Can you tell him Reggie Treehorne 1379 01:19:39,458 --> 01:19:42,000 and his special friend from Rolling for the Cure are here? 1380 01:19:44,834 --> 01:19:47,583 Remember, you're mute. 1381 01:19:47,667 --> 01:19:49,458 - Remember, it's not Rolling for the Cure. 1382 01:19:49,542 --> 01:19:52,500 It's Roll for the Cure. Look at the fucking T-shirt. 1383 01:19:52,583 --> 01:19:54,750 Uh, sorry. He's still at lunch. 1384 01:19:54,834 --> 01:19:56,542 - Oh, did I get the time... 1385 01:19:56,625 --> 01:19:59,083 Oh! Yeah, that's my bad. 1386 01:19:59,166 --> 01:20:01,542 Uh, well, perhaps we could wait in his office. 1387 01:20:01,625 --> 01:20:03,125 - I can't let you back there. 1388 01:20:03,208 --> 01:20:05,917 - You know, I'm just not sure you want the optics 1389 01:20:06,000 --> 01:20:08,834 of a special person loitering in the... 1390 01:20:08,917 --> 01:20:11,917 in the waiting area. You know what I mean? 1391 01:20:14,542 --> 01:20:15,375 - Sir. 1392 01:20:15,458 --> 01:20:17,542 - It's a corporate image kind of thing, 1393 01:20:17,625 --> 01:20:19,792 but if you're okay with that, I'm okay with that. 1394 01:20:20,875 --> 01:20:22,625 We'll be right over here. 1395 01:20:23,959 --> 01:20:25,875 Now. - Hmm...? 1396 01:20:28,166 --> 01:20:31,000 Oh! - Is he okay? 1397 01:20:31,083 --> 01:20:32,834 - Uh, you know, I don't know. 1398 01:20:33,792 --> 01:20:34,959 Oh! 1399 01:20:35,041 --> 01:20:37,083 Oh, he may need a bathroom. 1400 01:20:37,166 --> 01:20:39,792 Yeah, yeah, without question. 1401 01:20:39,875 --> 01:20:41,000 - The only bathroom we have is back there. 1402 01:20:41,083 --> 01:20:43,792 - You know, that's okay. I've got wet wipes. 1403 01:20:43,875 --> 01:20:45,917 If you could just... just get his belt for me. 1404 01:20:46,000 --> 01:20:48,792 And be careful, you know, you think adult diapers are full on water-tight, 1405 01:20:48,875 --> 01:20:51,208 but I've had some nasty surprises in my day. Haven't I, pal? 1406 01:20:52,417 --> 01:20:56,083 They call him the brown firehose down at the centre. 1407 01:20:56,166 --> 01:20:59,667 It's not because of his dick. Thank you. 1408 01:21:02,875 --> 01:21:04,917 We're gonna need more toilet paper. 1409 01:21:05,000 --> 01:21:07,083 - Someone just checked this morning-- - No, damn it, woman. 1410 01:21:07,166 --> 01:21:09,959 This is not a drill. We're in shit-con four. You need to hustle up 1411 01:21:10,041 --> 01:21:13,625 a pallet of double ply in a hurry or you're gonna need to repaint the whole bathroom. 1412 01:21:13,709 --> 01:21:14,083 Is that what you want, to repaint? 1413 01:21:16,792 --> 01:21:18,667 Okay. 1414 01:21:20,959 --> 01:21:23,166 You are pretty good at this. 1415 01:21:23,250 --> 01:21:24,125 - You should see me with an angry husband 1416 01:21:24,208 --> 01:21:26,792 when I'm nut-to-cheek with his old lady. 1417 01:21:26,875 --> 01:21:28,917 Come on, buddy, you got all the time you need. 1418 01:21:50,250 --> 01:21:52,792 And I know most guys would disagree, 1419 01:21:52,875 --> 01:21:55,125 but I found something incredibly erotic 1420 01:21:55,208 --> 01:21:58,667 about control top undergarments. You know, holding so much back. 1421 01:21:58,750 --> 01:22:01,041 But I'm taking about the bustier as a metaphor for aspirations of the heart. 1422 01:22:15,250 --> 01:22:18,208 It's funny when you think about it. I mean, the more you... 1423 01:22:18,291 --> 01:22:21,000 the more you sort of invite stuff to happen... - I like it. 1424 01:22:21,083 --> 01:22:24,250 - ...the more it can happen. Do you know what I mean? - Sure. 1425 01:22:24,333 --> 01:22:27,041 - He's gonna need a seltzer, I think. 1426 01:22:36,834 --> 01:22:38,959 - Alright, bud. 1427 01:22:55,709 --> 01:22:57,792 - Balls. 1428 01:23:00,291 --> 01:23:02,166 Security? 1429 01:23:38,208 --> 01:23:40,875 - Do I have to get a Hazmat team out here? 1430 01:23:40,959 --> 01:23:42,041 - No. 1431 01:23:42,125 --> 01:23:45,166 Like I said, I'm not a terrorist. 1432 01:23:45,250 --> 01:23:48,083 - Prove it. Make him eat some. - How would that... 1433 01:23:48,166 --> 01:23:50,917 I'm not going to eat my dad's ashes. 1434 01:23:51,000 --> 01:23:53,750 - See? - See what? 1435 01:23:53,834 --> 01:23:55,417 That I'm not a necro-cannibal? 1436 01:23:56,000 --> 01:23:59,041 - Okay, let's say that's true. 1437 01:23:59,125 --> 01:24:01,417 - That would be nice. 1438 01:24:01,500 --> 01:24:04,166 - You get why we can't have people throwing human remains on the playing surface? 1439 01:24:04,250 --> 01:24:06,750 Hygiene, workplace health and safety. 1440 01:24:06,834 --> 01:24:09,500 You know, I started here in high school. 1441 01:24:09,583 --> 01:24:11,875 We've had drunks, streakers, 1442 01:24:11,959 --> 01:24:15,875 a Morganna the Kissing Bandit wannabe, but... 1443 01:24:18,208 --> 01:24:19,750 never a corpse. 1444 01:24:20,375 --> 01:24:22,208 - It was his dying wish. 1445 01:24:22,583 --> 01:24:24,000 He, uh... 1446 01:24:24,083 --> 01:24:27,917 gave up season tickets for me and my mom. 1447 01:24:28,917 --> 01:24:30,458 - What was your old man's name? 1448 01:24:30,542 --> 01:24:33,291 - Andy Wall. 1449 01:24:33,375 --> 01:24:36,000 - So a real fan, huh? 1450 01:24:36,083 --> 01:24:39,125 - Why else would you want large men 1451 01:24:39,208 --> 01:24:43,083 bleeding and sweating all over your final resting place? 1452 01:24:51,083 --> 01:24:52,333 Why do you have a picture of my dad? 1453 01:24:54,917 --> 01:24:59,458 - I've never seen someone that drunk run that fast. 1454 01:25:00,917 --> 01:25:03,125 We figured he was trying to piss on the team logo. 1455 01:25:03,208 --> 01:25:06,000 To explain why his penis was exposed. 1456 01:25:06,333 --> 01:25:10,125 Although, we were 3 and 15 that year. So... 1457 01:25:10,208 --> 01:25:11,208 I get the impulse. 1458 01:25:15,166 --> 01:25:17,458 - You gotta be kidding me. 1459 01:25:23,458 --> 01:25:25,917 - Your old man could really hold a grudge. 1460 01:25:30,917 --> 01:25:33,041 - Well, do we need to evacuate? 1461 01:25:33,125 --> 01:25:36,375 - Hmm... I think we're good here. 1462 01:25:44,208 --> 01:25:45,375 Voluntary lifetime ban. 1463 01:26:02,625 --> 01:26:03,375 Just like your old man. 1464 01:26:17,458 --> 01:26:19,166 Hey, hey. 1465 01:26:20,417 --> 01:26:23,166 You want to leave him out in the parking lot by a sewer grate? 1466 01:26:23,250 --> 01:26:25,125 We could turn a blind eye. 1467 01:26:25,208 --> 01:26:26,291 - He obviously liked to tailgate. 1468 01:26:34,291 --> 01:26:37,291 - Hey, what hap-- Oh, God! What? 1469 01:26:37,375 --> 01:26:39,583 - He gave up the tickets for his family, huh? 1470 01:26:39,667 --> 01:26:40,750 - Oh, hey! Calm down! 1471 01:26:40,834 --> 01:26:44,667 - The one decent thing I thought he ever did is bullshit. 1472 01:26:44,750 --> 01:26:48,083 - Look, he hoped the ashes would maybe curse the team for the rest of time. 1473 01:26:48,166 --> 01:26:50,208 And in his defense, his pain meds were kicking in pretty good. 1474 01:26:50,291 --> 01:26:53,375 You should hear what I talked him out of. 1475 01:26:53,458 --> 01:26:56,333 - Did he tell you to lie to me? - It was an agreed upon approach. 1476 01:26:56,417 --> 01:26:59,291 I mean, if the money didn't hook you, we had the old heart-strings. 1477 01:26:59,375 --> 01:27:01,667 - Does my mom know? - What? 1478 01:27:01,750 --> 01:27:03,542 Don't blame it on your mom. She wanted you to have one nice memory of your dad. 1479 01:27:05,166 --> 01:27:07,375 - See you around, Jeff. 1480 01:27:07,458 --> 01:27:10,125 - Hey! Where are you going? You don't have a job. 1481 01:27:10,208 --> 01:27:11,959 You need to do this. 1482 01:27:12,041 --> 01:27:14,542 - Yeah, I wouldn't scatter his ashes for a million dollars. 1483 01:27:14,625 --> 01:27:18,417 - Oh, yeah. So you're just gonna let the golf club build a new steam room. 1484 01:27:18,500 --> 01:27:19,458 Look, I can't defend the guy. 1485 01:27:19,542 --> 01:27:22,542 But, you know, I care about the old jackass. 1486 01:27:22,625 --> 01:27:24,542 - Yeah, well, that makes one of us. 1487 01:27:24,625 --> 01:27:25,959 - Let me explain something to you. 1488 01:27:26,041 --> 01:27:31,083 Your dad was not proud of some of the choices he made in his life. 1489 01:27:31,166 --> 01:27:34,250 And his biggest regret was his estrangement from you. 1490 01:27:35,709 --> 01:27:38,291 And the afternoon he told me about it... 1491 01:27:39,291 --> 01:27:42,000 I mean, it just broke my heart. 1492 01:27:44,583 --> 01:27:46,166 - Fuck you. 1493 01:27:46,250 --> 01:27:47,583 - Oh, I gave it a shot. But fuck what he wants. 1494 01:27:47,667 --> 01:27:52,125 And fuck that dumb part of your ego that wants to spite him. 1495 01:27:52,208 --> 01:27:54,000 Fuck your pride two times on Sunday! 1496 01:27:54,083 --> 01:27:56,166 Just fucking be the better man! 1497 01:27:57,125 --> 01:27:59,041 Or 20 years from now, 1498 01:27:59,125 --> 01:28:01,375 you can look back on your life, whatever it is you do, 1499 01:28:01,458 --> 01:28:04,667 and you'll be able to say, "Wow, was I ever a pussy!" 1500 01:28:04,750 --> 01:28:07,375 - Yeah, well, at least I'm a pussy who can provide for his family. 1501 01:28:07,458 --> 01:28:09,542 - Or a pussy who drinks himself to sleep every night 1502 01:28:09,625 --> 01:28:11,959 and starts banging his overweight secretary 1503 01:28:12,041 --> 01:28:14,542 just because her muted cries of ecstasy from the copy room 1504 01:28:14,625 --> 01:28:16,375 are the only thing that make him feel half-alive. 1505 01:28:17,542 --> 01:28:20,250 - Well, that was... was really specific. 1506 01:28:20,333 --> 01:28:23,542 - Because that's the way it always happens. 1507 01:28:23,625 --> 01:28:26,250 Your family can't be happy unless you're happy. 1508 01:28:26,333 --> 01:28:28,583 And you, my son, are one mopey fuck. 1509 01:28:31,375 --> 01:28:33,542 So your dad had me lie to you. 1510 01:28:33,625 --> 01:28:35,625 You wanted to know more about him? 1511 01:28:35,709 --> 01:28:37,709 Well, maybe that's all there is to know. 1512 01:28:37,792 --> 01:28:39,500 So fucking what? 1513 01:28:40,750 --> 01:28:42,208 Life is a series of trade-offs. 1514 01:28:42,291 --> 01:28:44,750 And they don't all have to be bad. 1515 01:28:44,834 --> 01:28:47,333 Just... 1516 01:28:48,208 --> 01:28:50,333 get this done. 1517 01:28:50,417 --> 01:28:53,333 And then, don't think about him again. 1518 01:28:58,375 --> 01:29:01,542 - We were really close, weren't we? 1519 01:29:01,625 --> 01:29:02,750 - Yes! 1520 01:29:02,834 --> 01:29:04,458 - You know, right on the field. 1521 01:29:04,542 --> 01:29:07,291 - Inches from greatness. 1522 01:29:07,667 --> 01:29:08,792 - Inches. - Inches. 1523 01:29:08,875 --> 01:29:13,166 As the ladies always tell me. I kid. I get the job done. 1524 01:29:22,000 --> 01:29:24,542 Come on! 1525 01:29:25,834 --> 01:29:27,750 - What time is it? 1526 01:29:31,875 --> 01:29:33,583 Got you. 1527 01:29:36,291 --> 01:29:36,667 Oh, fuck. 1528 01:29:36,750 --> 01:29:39,375 Uh... 1529 01:29:47,250 --> 01:29:48,709 What time is it? 1530 01:29:48,792 --> 01:29:51,000 Society really started going the wrong way 1531 01:29:51,083 --> 01:29:53,750 when they took prayer out of schools. And then, stopped wearing watches. 1532 01:29:53,834 --> 01:29:54,625 Can we focus, please? 1533 01:29:54,709 --> 01:29:55,625 You really got 15 minutes? 1534 01:29:58,583 --> 01:30:01,125 If we're a little bit too sensitive, 1535 01:30:01,208 --> 01:30:03,000 you're gonna be all over the place. 1536 01:30:03,083 --> 01:30:05,625 So what you need to do is you need to... 1537 01:30:05,709 --> 01:30:06,959 ...so that you're not gonna be flying all over... 1538 01:30:07,041 --> 01:30:10,709 - Alright, I think I got this. Alright. I need my dad's phone. 1539 01:30:10,792 --> 01:30:11,959 - What? - I need my dad's phone. 1540 01:30:12,041 --> 01:30:15,041 I gotta tape it to the plane so we could live stream it. 1541 01:30:15,125 --> 01:30:17,125 - No. I'd really hate to burn the roll over minutes. 1542 01:30:17,208 --> 01:30:19,250 - Give me the phone. 1543 01:30:21,583 --> 01:30:26,125 What's Vince's e-mail? 1544 01:30:27,333 --> 01:30:29,542 - Okay. Flip that over. 1545 01:30:34,709 --> 01:30:37,125 Okay, Dad. Let's go. 1546 01:30:37,208 --> 01:30:37,917 Put it right there. 1547 01:30:38,000 --> 01:30:40,500 Here, hold this. 1548 01:30:44,667 --> 01:30:46,792 Alright, we got power. Here we go. 1549 01:30:47,834 --> 01:30:49,500 There we go. Come on, come on. 1550 01:30:49,583 --> 01:30:50,792 Oh! - You're up, you're up. 1551 01:30:54,834 --> 01:30:58,333 - Alright! Come on, baby. Alright, oh! 1552 01:30:58,417 --> 01:31:00,375 We got it. 1553 01:31:00,458 --> 01:31:02,208 This is easy. Wait, wait. It's going around. 1554 01:31:02,291 --> 01:31:04,333 - It's coming right at us! Oh, whoa! 1555 01:31:04,417 --> 01:31:06,208 - Alright, come on. 1556 01:31:06,291 --> 01:31:08,583 - Just stop moving! - Alright, I'm not. - Uh-oh! 1557 01:31:08,667 --> 01:31:10,458 - There we go. - Oh! That's a straight line. 1558 01:31:10,542 --> 01:31:12,834 That's the whole job. Right there. 1559 01:31:15,333 --> 01:31:16,834 No, you're a natural. 1560 01:31:18,500 --> 01:31:20,750 I can see right into the stadium. 1561 01:31:20,834 --> 01:31:22,792 That's it. You got it, you got it. Look! 1562 01:31:22,875 --> 01:31:25,291 - Come on. - You gotta get higher. 1563 01:31:52,542 --> 01:31:56,291 Uh-oh! 1564 01:32:00,375 --> 01:32:02,000 Hold it steady. - How you doing? 1565 01:32:02,083 --> 01:32:04,250 Just making a quick phone call. - Come on, come on. Faster. 1566 01:32:10,625 --> 01:32:12,250 Hold it steady. 1567 01:32:12,333 --> 01:32:14,333 - Quick, behind the serial killer van. 1568 01:32:14,417 --> 01:32:15,875 - Hold it steady. 1569 01:32:18,542 --> 01:32:20,250 - We're losing it, we're losing it. 1570 01:32:20,333 --> 01:32:21,750 - Slow and steady. I can't see. - You got it. 1571 01:32:21,834 --> 01:32:25,333 - Just need a little more. 1572 01:32:25,417 --> 01:32:27,208 - Nice and tight. 1573 01:32:27,291 --> 01:32:29,458 Drop your weapon! - Good evening, officer. 1574 01:32:29,542 --> 01:32:32,500 Just... not a weapon. - Drop whatever is in your hand! 1575 01:32:32,583 --> 01:32:34,458 - Just a little more time. 1576 01:32:34,542 --> 01:32:37,834 - Gonna get down very slowly. - I'm not gonna ask you again. 1577 01:32:37,917 --> 01:32:39,875 - Putting it down. 1578 01:32:40,417 --> 01:32:41,667 Got it. 1579 01:32:56,500 --> 01:32:57,375 - Got it. 1580 01:32:57,458 --> 01:32:59,709 Rest in peace, asshole. 1581 01:33:02,458 --> 01:33:04,375 - Hands on the van! 1582 01:33:11,041 --> 01:33:14,333 - And I tell you, if we weren't a couple of white guys, 1583 01:33:14,417 --> 01:33:16,667 we would've been tased, beaten and pepper-sprayed. 1584 01:33:16,750 --> 01:33:20,083 It's nice to know being a tax-paying citizen is still good for some in this country. 1585 01:33:20,166 --> 01:33:22,250 - Okay. Here we go. 1586 01:33:23,375 --> 01:33:25,959 - Even though I lost a friend, I feel like I gained... 1587 01:33:27,083 --> 01:33:28,959 his hot ex-wife. 1588 01:33:29,041 --> 01:33:30,625 To leave a woman that's so... 1589 01:33:30,709 --> 01:33:33,291 - Don't be gross. Please don't be gross. 1590 01:33:33,375 --> 01:33:34,959 - ...vital. 1591 01:33:35,959 --> 01:33:39,417 Juicy. I mean, which at her age... come on. 1592 01:33:39,500 --> 01:33:42,625 - I understand. The more that I ask you to stop, the more you keep going. 1593 01:33:43,834 --> 01:33:46,542 Just like in my mom. 1594 01:33:48,500 --> 01:33:51,667 - What? - For my grandson. 1595 01:33:53,458 --> 01:33:57,375 Your father gave this to me on our first date. 1596 01:33:57,458 --> 01:34:00,041 - That's really... sweet. 1597 01:34:00,125 --> 01:34:02,583 - He had his moments. 1598 01:34:02,667 --> 01:34:04,750 - Okay, well, if you'll excuse me. 1599 01:34:04,834 --> 01:34:05,709 Your mom's coffee goes through me 1600 01:34:05,792 --> 01:34:08,417 like a welfare mom through food stamps. 1601 01:34:08,500 --> 01:34:09,792 Oh. 1602 01:34:11,125 --> 01:34:12,125 Oh, that's my Uber. Okay. 1603 01:34:12,208 --> 01:34:14,792 Gotta go. 1604 01:34:15,458 --> 01:34:17,917 So I guess I'll see you when I get back here. 1605 01:34:18,000 --> 01:34:19,625 - Oh. 1606 01:34:19,709 --> 01:34:21,625 I thought you said I could come visit you next month. 1607 01:34:21,709 --> 01:34:22,375 - What about the... 1608 01:34:22,458 --> 01:34:25,750 the office and the birthdays? 1609 01:34:25,834 --> 01:34:28,000 - There's more to life than just work. 1610 01:34:30,458 --> 01:34:33,542 - I would like that. Bring Jeff if you'd like. 1611 01:34:33,625 --> 01:34:35,041 - Oh, don't jump ahead. 1612 01:34:35,125 --> 01:34:36,208 We're just friends. 1613 01:34:36,291 --> 01:34:39,583 I mean... with the benefit. Is that how you say it? 1614 01:34:39,667 --> 01:34:42,625 - That is how you say it, yes. 1615 01:34:42,709 --> 01:34:45,041 - He certainly has some interesting views. 1616 01:34:45,125 --> 01:34:47,166 - Mmm... yeah, you could... 1617 01:34:47,250 --> 01:34:49,792 you could help him out. 1618 01:34:49,875 --> 01:34:52,041 I always said you needed a hobby. 1619 01:34:52,125 --> 01:34:53,834 - It's kind of nice to be liked. 1620 01:34:53,917 --> 01:34:57,709 It's a good reason to get up in the morning. 1621 01:34:58,625 --> 01:34:59,875 - Yeah. 1622 01:35:01,959 --> 01:35:03,333 Go. 1623 01:35:03,417 --> 01:35:04,500 - Okay. 1624 01:35:04,583 --> 01:35:07,417 Uh, hey, Jeff! I gotta get going. 1625 01:35:07,500 --> 01:35:08,917 Yeah. I'd come and say goodbye, 1626 01:35:09,000 --> 01:35:11,959 but I'm dealing with a real Cancun omelette in here. 1627 01:35:12,041 --> 01:35:13,709 - Okay. 1628 01:35:25,667 --> 01:35:28,917 It's okay. It's okay. 1629 01:35:29,917 --> 01:35:32,542 I'm gonna read you a little story here. 1630 01:35:33,750 --> 01:35:38,500 Fully equipped 2,000 square-foot 1631 01:35:38,583 --> 01:35:40,959 with incidental liquor. 1632 01:35:41,041 --> 01:35:44,458 Sidewalk cafe patio. 1633 01:35:44,542 --> 01:35:46,792 Hear that? 1634 01:35:46,875 --> 01:35:48,792 Package good. 1635 01:35:48,875 --> 01:35:50,625 Looks good. 1636 01:35:50,709 --> 01:35:54,792 Tobacco license. No smoking for you. 1637 01:35:56,208 --> 01:35:59,834 This one is 1,100 square-foot 1638 01:35:59,917 --> 01:36:04,583 with an 800-square-foot basement. 1639 01:36:04,667 --> 01:36:08,500 C-3 zoned. 1640 01:36:08,583 --> 01:36:10,583 Hot location. 1641 01:36:10,667 --> 01:36:12,667 - Hot location? 1642 01:36:12,750 --> 01:36:15,583 You know, that was my band's name in high school. 1643 01:36:17,250 --> 01:36:18,625 Oh, my God. 1644 01:36:18,709 --> 01:36:22,333 Is that a smile? Did it hurt? 1645 01:36:22,417 --> 01:36:25,792 - No. But this might. 1646 01:36:26,667 --> 01:36:28,750 What would you say 1647 01:36:28,834 --> 01:36:32,000 if I told you that I quit my job? 1648 01:36:33,250 --> 01:36:36,041 - I'd say, 1649 01:36:36,125 --> 01:36:37,875 do you really think the fact that what's-his-name's 1650 01:36:38,000 --> 01:36:41,375 almost out is gonna keep me from yelling at you? 1651 01:36:41,458 --> 01:36:43,041 - That was the plan. 1652 01:36:47,917 --> 01:36:49,750 - Wake me up when you come to bed. 1653 01:36:49,834 --> 01:36:53,000 - You wanna talk about it tonight? 1654 01:36:53,333 --> 01:36:55,792 - No. 1655 01:36:55,875 --> 01:36:58,000 I don't want to talk tonight. 1656 01:37:04,166 --> 01:37:05,542 - Oh. 1657 01:37:06,917 --> 01:37:09,583 Okay. One more story. 1658 01:37:11,709 --> 01:37:13,208 Once upon a time... 1659 01:37:13,291 --> 01:37:16,000 there was... 1660 01:37:17,458 --> 01:37:19,041 this golfer. 1661 01:37:19,125 --> 01:37:23,083 And one day, he came home late from the golf course. 1662 01:37:24,667 --> 01:37:27,041 ♪ Somewhere along the way ♪ 1663 01:37:30,667 --> 01:37:33,917 ♪ I got off on the side roads ♪ 1664 01:37:37,125 --> 01:37:40,542 ♪ Somewhere along the way ♪ 1665 01:37:43,083 --> 01:37:46,041 ♪ I found where my heart goes ♪ 1666 01:37:46,709 --> 01:37:49,583 ♪ Because now I know ♪ 1667 01:37:49,667 --> 01:37:54,875 ♪ Sometimes the path in front of us is hard to see ♪ 1668 01:38:00,166 --> 01:38:02,709 ♪ Lying in your bed ♪ 1669 01:38:04,959 --> 01:38:07,917 ♪ The worries in your head ♪ 1670 01:38:09,709 --> 01:38:14,917 ♪ If I try maybe I could be like you ♪ 1671 01:38:19,709 --> 01:38:22,917 ♪ Somewhere along the way ♪ 1672 01:38:24,750 --> 01:38:29,083 ♪ I got off on the side roads ♪ 1673 01:38:31,917 --> 01:38:35,083 ♪ And somewhere along the way ♪ 1674 01:38:38,125 --> 01:38:41,709 ♪ I followed where my heart goes ♪ 1675 01:38:42,208 --> 01:38:44,250 ♪ Because now I know ♪ 1676 01:38:44,917 --> 01:38:49,959 ♪ Sometimes the path in front of us is hard to see ♪ 1677 01:38:54,750 --> 01:38:59,291 ♪ I guess I needed a little faith in me ♪ 1678 01:39:04,375 --> 01:39:09,291 ♪ Somewhere along the way ♪