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["Let's Go For It" plays]
¶ From the day that we met ¶
¶ Oh, my heart skipped A beat in my chest ¶
¶ And I never got over it So baby ¶
¶ Let's go for it now ¶
¶ When we finally kissed ¶
¶ I leaned in and you Laughed 'cause I missed ¶
¶ I got nothing To show for it ¶
¶ So baby let's go For it now ¶
¶ I might not be The smoothest guy around ¶
¶ Or the topic Of every girl in town ¶
¶ But I love you The experts all agree ¶
¶ And I come with A lifetime guarantee ¶
¶ So, if you're Looking for love ¶
¶ I can promise when Push comes to shove ¶
¶ I won't ever get over it So baby let's go for it now ¶
[applauses]
Diggsy.
Oh, buddy. She's not the only girl in the world.
I just feel like I have wasted my entire life.
No, no, no, no. Think of this as a clean slate.
As a new beginning.
[slow music]
Okay, I gotta go.
I better see you at the reception, okay?
Suzette would be heartbroken if you didn't show up.
There will be free drinks.
Suzette and her new husband.
[coughs]
No.
-[phone line connecting] -[Suzette] Hey, it's Suzette. Leave a message.
Hey, Suzette. It is Diggsy.
The guy whose heart you shit on today.
I'm sorry-- that...
[woman] ...your message, press one. Otherwise press--
I should have come out a long time ago--
not come out. I could have asked you to the prom.
I know I asked you to prom.
Three times but--
Like you're the, the sun...
casting down these warming rays onto my little...
cat body
and I'd just be drinking up your milk.
No, I don't-- you don't have milk.
[chuckles] Hey, you can just--
don't even listen to that last message
cause, uh, just... having a rough night.
Here's what I really want to say.
All I want is for you to be happy.
That's all I've ever wanted and if you...
if you found what you're looking for
then I'm happy.
[slow music]
Okay, bye.
["How Much Can A Man Take" plays]
¶ Every time my arm Reach out for you ¶
¶ You push them away ¶
¶ And when I'm caught Begging for my money ¶
¶ You're going out to play ¶
¶ You know you always ¶
¶ Get your way ¶
¶ You tell me everything... ¶
-What--? -Okay. Don't worry.
Mm-hmm. You won't find that around here.
[chuckles] Mortimer.
Diggsy.
Are you, uh... were you at that wedding?
No.
I used to date a woman.
Her name was Candice.
Her special talent was sleeping with my best friend.
I didn't find out about this talent
until the day after I ate some pepper spray
disguised as hot chicken and I had to run home from work to,
you know, use the bathroom.
Only to find Candice straddling my pal, Kenneth.
It was late at night
and I was throwing myself a cheap vodka party
sitting on the sidewalk of a busy street.
Let's just say my mind wasn't filled
with unicorns and sunshine.
Then, she stopped.
A mystery in a printed dress wearing combat boots.
And she handed me this.
I want to give this to you.
You don't, you don't have to keep it.
You can give it to somebody else,
but it looks like you could use it.
[soft music]
Best of luck.
[sighs]
[key drops]
[Diggsy] "This key opens doors to parallel universes."
[laughs]
"Once you walk through and close a door, there's no going back."
[soft music continues]
[cell phone ringing]
[cell phone continues ringing]
[cell phone ringing]
[soft music continues]
[sighs]
[scoffs]
[drops the key]
["Waking Up a Dream" plays]
-Hey. -Hi.
Sorry, that bathroom line was like forever long
but I brought you back a snack.
Not from the bathroom. From like a tray with food on it.
Thank you.
So, okay, you said you were about to tell me
something "kind of very important."
I'm writing a book.
Diggsy, that's great.
-Yeah. -What's it about?
Oh, are there robots in it?
-No robots this time. -Damn.
It's more of like a...
-romantical-ish-- you know... -Oh.
like a-- it's a guy or a guy that loves this girl
and it's his first love and--
A love story, yeah.
Yeah.
Mm, that's great.
That's really great.
I mean, you've talked about wanting to write a book
-since we were in middle school. -Middle school. Yeah.
And now you're actually doing it.
I'm really proud of you.
-Thanks. -I can't wait to read it.
But there should be robots in this book.
-Well, I could put-- -Sorry.
Can you two move out of the way, please?
Because there's this guy that's trying to challenge me
to an arm-wrestling match
and I really would love to embarrass him in public.
Ladies and gentlemen.
Please take a moment and witness the stupidity of a man
as I am about to gently rip off his arm
of this frail human. Move.
[people chattering and laughing]
[man] Come on!
You're my favorite plus one.
[romantic music]
[people chattering and laughing]
[soft music]
[soft music continues]
[man laughing]
[scoffs]
[soft music continues]
[Diggsy stutters]
-Do you need anything else? -No.
I'm, I'm okay. Thank you.
-Okay. Let me know. -Okay.
[scoffs]
[soft music]
[knocking on door]
Oh, good. You're not dead. Why aren't you answering your phone?
I, uh, it spent the night in the fridge. It's been acting funny ever since.
Suzette was very disappointed you didn't come to the reception last night.
I expected more of you.
-Yeah, well. -You should probably listen to the voice mails
I left you though cause as the night went on
things got really colorful.
-What is this? -Nothing. Thank you.
No, this is not nothing.
Another Suzette? Parallel universes?
Leave Daphne? Diggsy, what is this?
Let's sit and chat.
[soft music]
Good.
So, I know this is gonna sound crazy,
but this key supposedly can open any door
and when you open that door
you go to a parallel universe.
-Daphne. -Do you want to go grab something to eat
or see a movie, or just chill out, or something?
Just let me explain. Yesterday, after Suzette's wedding,
this man approached me.
He gave me this key. He seemed to think I needed it.
I know it sounds crazy.
Yeah, Digs, it sounds bad shit insane.
Some stranger danger approaches you,
gives you some magical key and you believe him?
That isn't like you, Diggsy.
Come here. Come here.
I don't know, Daph-- I just, I need to do something.
I know.
Like, I woke up this morning and I was thinking--
what if there are other Suzettes?
Okay. Okay. Come on. Let's do it.
Let's try it. Yeah, and you know what?
If it doesn't work then we'll laugh, we'll forget about it
and I'll set you up with Amy, that really cute girl
-with the round butt and the eyes? -Round butt Amy.
-Yeah. -Yeah.
[soft music]
Now all you need is a whip.
Yeah.
I mean should I call mom and dad and--
It's kind of a big decision to leave everything, right?
Just get your magic key out and show me the universe.
Universes. Whatever.
Oh, yeah. I don't think it worked.
-I'll call round butt Amy. -No, no.
Maybe this is how it works.
It's very underwhelming so...
-You could come with me. -Or you could go first.
Okay, have a great trip. Love you. Bye.
[soft music continues]
All right, Daphne.
It's not funny. Oh, I mean, it is kind of funny,
but it's not funny to me.
Yes?
Daphne?
Daphne? No.
You have the wrong address. Now bugger off.
Well--
[soft music]
[church bell rings]
[soft music continues]
[Diggsy clears his throat]
I'll talk to you. What's this?
Like everything's okay. It's not.
Why are you in my office?
I'm still really pissed at you.
So? Where were you?
Where, where, where was I? Um...
were we supposed to-- no, I'm not.
What? With you just showing up at my office
I was kind of expecting something like, "Oh, hey, Suzette.
How was your baby's first birthday party that I totally skipped?"
To which I would have said, "It was absolutely magical.
I had a bounce house, I had two balloon guys.
There was this fancy Mexican ice cream.
I don't understand it but it cost a lot of money.
And you know what wasn't there? You."
It was elegant, tasteful,
which you would know had you attended.
I don't...
[whispering] I don't know what to say right now.
You are a child. I can't. Just, just go.
-Well... -Just go. Leave now.
-That way. -Mmm.
[soft music]
[indistinct chatter]
Hey. Oh, hey, buddy, what are you doing here?
-Hi. Yeah, I uh-- -So, I was just telling Suzette
about how you took the kids to the beach
and how adorable Scout was running into the ocean.
My gosh. I bet she's gotten so big. I haven't seen her in forever.
And the little guy? I've not even met him yet.
-So cute. Yeah. -[Suzette] How's Penelope?
She's one of those women you would never know she had a baby two months ago.
-But she looks amazing. -[Suzette] Yeah. I believe it.
-Of course, she does. -Oh!
-Oh, Penelope. -Hey, babe.
-Where's Scout? -[Penelope] Oh, your mom has her
so I can get a cup of coffee.
Suzette. It has been forever since we've seen you.
[Suzette] I know. We were just talking about that.
You look amazing. Congratulations on this little cutie.
Adorable.
Here you go.
How are you doing, ladies?
Good.
Okay. [chuckles] You know our kids like to eat, right?
Shouldn't you be at work?
Yeah, why don't you two grab some coffee
-and hang out and chat with us for a little bit? -Yeah.
Oh, well, I've got to go to work and make that money.
[laughs] So, I'll see you.
Are you okay, Diggsy? You kind of seem like you got punched by a fish.
A fish? Okay.
I'm gonna say, bye.
Hey, you. Something is off.
I have never seen this outfit before.
And, and-- you are, you are not wearing my cologne.
That, and, where is your wedding ring?
Are you, are you fooling around on me?
Are you fooling around on me?
Is that, is that what's happening?
No, I don't think he is and I'm really sorry...
-Where are you going? -...and goodbye.
What do you mean you don't think he is--?
[soft music]
Hi, Suzette, it's Diggsy.
[indistinct screams]
This is just like a dream I had once, only you weren't wearing that tie
and your mustache was nicer looking.
Oh, now what was I saying? Oh, after you left town last year I kind of went through
a little bit of rough patch, but I'm much better now.
My friend Lisa, I don't know if you remember Lisa, she's been really helpful.
She works at the place that makes the paper that goes into books.
It's a very special type of paper. She told me all about it.
That's your seat. You sit there.
She has a little dog named Hiccup and that dog makes a noise
exactly like a hiccup. I mean, it's not really a hiccup
because I don't think that dogs can hiccup.
No, I don't think that dogs can hiccup.
Oh, then after you left, I started eating a lot but
then I stopped and that wasn't good either.
Hmm. What else, what else, what else, what else?
When you filed that restraining order my mom was so mad at you.
Oh, but I know she'd love to see you again.
Oh! You could come over and meet my kitten.
His name is Mr. Fuzzyface and he is cute.
Yes, he's so cute. Well, he's not really a kitten, he's a cat,
cause he's five which is 37 in people years so that makes him older than we are.
[both laugh]
Will you excuse me for a moment?
[soft music]
[sighs]
-Hey! -Ha, ha.
The bathroom's over there.
I just gotta... [laughs]
Hi. Are you okay in there?
You're acting kind of funny.
Just-- Um, here.
Yes. Huh.
I'm sorry. Please forgive me.
Have fun at the beach!
Okay.
[soft music]
Hey, you.
Diggsy?
[laughs]
What the hell are you doing in Reykjavik?
Suzette! Hi.
-Hello. -It's me, Diggsy.
-I'm sorry. Have we met before? -What?
-Want to go have a drink? -Yes.
Oh, since you're here can you put some sunscreen on my back?
Yeah.
Mm-mmm.
[laughs] Oh. Shoot.
Your daddy isn't really good at...
What is happening?
-Let's go. -Hey, you. I didn't know you were coming.
Abbi, do you have any lotion? I've got this weird rash on--
oh, hey, uh, it's not that weird.
-That was quick. -What the hell?
You know I gotta go.
-Where are you going? -Just, uh...
get a thing.
[soft music]
I'm sorry but I had a whole lot of drinks and now I have to tinkle.
-[Suzette] Tinkle? -Yeah.
[Suzette] It's okay.
Just don't be long.
Suzette, I gotta means I gotta.
Mm. Go. Go. Go. Go.
-Uh... -Go.
Oh.
[opens the door]
No. No, no, no. No!
I gotta. Ugh. Oh.
[yells]
[soft music]
-Hey, you want the usual? -Sure. Thank you.
-For here? -Uh, yeah. Sounds good.
I'll add it to your tab.
Tab. Yeah. Ha.
Do one of these.
Well.
Thank you.
Okay. So, a few things. One, you act like you don't know who I am
which is really strange. Two, we joke about having tabs here
but we really don't have tabs here. And you know--
you're walking into the store as we speak.
[whispering] Don't go anywhere.
-Hey. -Hey. How are you?
-Um, want the usual? -Yes. One usual.
Great. To go?
Uh, yes, thank you. Got a big meeting
-and gotta get my caffeine. -Mm-hmm.
-[Diggsy] It's good to see you. -Good to see you too.
Okay.
Who are you? Are you a twin?
-No. -Are you a clone?
-Are you an alien? -Just, we're--
no, none of those and it's kind of...
-ridiculous, uh... -I'm Gwyneth.
-Diggsy. -I know.
So, if you're not him and you're not a pod person.
Who are you?
Oh, customer.
Look, I'm about to be done with my shift
and I would love for you to explain all of this to me. Cool?
-Cool. -Sweet. Be back, right. Oh.
So, let's say you find this girl. Then what?
What do you mean?
I mean is that really the grand prize?
You have this unbelievable opportunity.
Do you really want to waste this awesomeness on some girl?
Some girl you don't even really know. What was her name again?
Suzette.
Right. Her, but like, okay,
I get you knew this first Suzette but like all these other Suzettes
could be complete Bobbilobbers.
What's a Bobbilobber?
A crazy person.
Right. Okay.
What now?
I don't know. Uh...
tell me about yourself?
I lived in Russia for a while.
Really? Do you speak it?
-[speaks in a foreign language] -What does that mean?
I hate the name Gwen.
I love animals but I would never have a pet.
And I'm not afraid to experience new things.
I actually have an 18-year-old bourbon at the house that I've been dying to open.
Want to try it with me?
Uh, uh--
Yes?
[soft music]
Make yourself at home.
Thanks.
Sorry, I just-- I hate my coffee making clothes.
I actually prefer minimum clothing but...
I thought I should keep it family friendly for your sake.
Well, you don't have to--
I mean, like, you know if you're comfortable with the--
Can I be forward?
I think you've proven you can be, yes.
Have you ever played strip karaoke?
-[soft music] -No.
¶ She's walking Down the road and ¶
¶ She's finding it hard to-- ¶
I don't know.
-I won! -All right.
¶ Night outside we duck-- ¶
Gee!
It's kind of...
That's a repeat. You didn't do it.
[Diggsy] Scrabble. [laughs]
All right, your number is a lucky number.
Hey. I got nothing.
-There. -I'm really ticklish.
I know.
Ah, yeah.
I'm just-- Where does it go?
Like the empire state building.
Argh. Ah!
Okay, so what happened?
I'm not exactly sure.
I mean, I remember a few things.
¶ Hey ¶ Scrabble.
-Having a creative-- -I'm gonna sing all the songs right.
I remember a tongue in my mouth.
Mm. You hungry?
Oh.
[rock music]
-Wait, what's this? -What are you talking about?
You said we were going to watch The Matrix .
This is The Matrix .
Will Smith isn't in The Matrix .
Yeah, he is. He's Neo.
I've seen this movie like ten times
and that is definitely Will Smith.
Wait, does someone else play Neo in your universe?
Keanu Reeves.
Ted from Bill and Ted's Excellent Time Machine?
Huh. No way.
Way.
[slow music]
What?
[sighs] I don't know I just, I have so many questions.
Like what?
How about you just tell me a story?
So, Daphne and Suzette were
best friends since we were young.
So Suzette was over at our house all the time.
And every time she'd sleep over, I thought that was the night,
you know, that she would...
kiss me.
That she and Daphne would be watching a movie and that--
just go to bed.
She was really nice,
so fun,
flirty even--
nothing ever happened.
Maybe you should have just kissed her?
Yeah. Maybe.
[slow music]
Hello?
Oh, I'm sorry. I, I--
Diggsy?
Hey, Daph.
[slow music continues]
Uh, how is this possible?
I mean I know it's odd but--
Odd? Diggsy, you're dead.
Hey, Daph, I'm sorry-- just let me explain.
[kettle whistling]
So, you're like my Diggsy,
except that you're here and you're alive.
Yes. Sounds about right.
Um, you, you and other me...
Best friends.
So, you just left me all alone.
I've thought about it every day since I left.
How long has it been?
I don't know anymore.
So how does it work?
Well, I don't know what dictates it,
but for our purposes,
let's just say that every time someone makes a decision
there's a split. And now there's two people in parallel universes,
one who dated the girl and one who didn't.
And there are an infinite number of these possibilities
and I have a key that lets me bounce, boom, boom, boom, boom--
from one universe to the next.
But the thing is there's versions of us,
me, you, possibly in all of these universes.
Huh. Okay, and, and-- so you did all of this to find Suzette?
Suzette Larking?
-So, she's here? -Yeah, yeah,
but she's not for you. Trust me.
So, she's not your friend?
N-no, no. I don't, I don't know what version Suzette you know,
but the Suzette here is a complete bitch.
[scoffs] Really?
Yeah.
[soft music]
Good morning. [grunts]
So, I thought-- [clears her throat]
Does this mean you're leaving me?
You don't have to leave.
The longer I stay the more it will hurt to leave.
You don't have to leave because of some trampy whore kitten.
You don't have to leave. There's no other Diggsy here.
I have so many, so many wonderful friends
that you would love and they would love you.
It's easier this way.
Like ripping off a Band-Aid.
No. No, no. Diggsy, no. Diggsy.
[crying] Diggsy, don't leave me.
Okay, okay.
Daphne.
[dramatic music]
Do you have to?
Don't you-- Oh.
[suspense music]
Daphne.
We can't go back. Can we?
[panting]
I'm so sorry.
We can't go back.
[crying] No.
Okay. Okay.
You just-- Damn it!
I'm so sorry.
But you--
[turns the shower on]
I cannot believe you took a shower in that stranger's house
-and took her clothes. -Well, I needed a shower
and I needed some clothes so.
Daph, I'm...
So, how does it work? Um...
what do you do? You say magic words
-and then we're... -No, I just open doors
and sometimes I see people.
-You mean like my college roommate, Penelope? -That's kind of specific but--
No, no. There's my college roommate, Penelope.
Daphne! Hi! Mm! Mm.
Wow. Wow, wow, wow. Friendly.
I thought you weren't getting into town until Friday.
I love it when you surprise me!
Do you know Diggsy?
-Of course, I do. So silly. -Yes. Right.
-Hey, Diggsy. -Hi.
How's Suzette?
Oh, she's, um, f-f-finding-- she's, she's good.
Great. That's great.
I'm so glad you're back, Bear.
Hey, why-- why is your hair wet?
Were you just-- were you just up at my place?
Oh, I don't know. Are these your clothes?
No-- Yeah, okay.
You're so silly, Daphebear.
I'm so glad I got to see you early.
I'm gonna text you about dinner.
I have to run to this meeting now.
-What a fun surprise! -Yeah.
Mwah, mwah. Bye. Bye, Diggsy.
-Bye. -Bye.
Bye.
-What was that? -I, uh, it's
like Daphne did some experimenting in college.
Sure. Sure. Yeah, well, that was, uh...
-you know? -I know.
Okay. Okay, well, we have to go.
But did you hear what she said about the, uh...
Yes, but that means that Suzette's already taken.
So, we're no good here. Let's go. Let's go.
Get a key. Get a door. Find a door, find a key.
-But-- yeah. Oh, okay. -[soft music]
¶ Everybody's looking For a prize now ¶
¶ Hoping that they won't Ever be left out ¶
¶ They're looking in the sky And watch it falling down ¶
¶ So, everybody Open up your eyes ¶
¶ Your eyes closed ¶
¶ Oh, Oh, oh ¶
¶ Oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh ¶
¶ Oh, Oh, oh ¶
¶ Oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh ¶
[slow music]
Why Suzette?
There was this moment.
We were playing hide and seek after school
when she took my hand,
led me behind these bushes,
and we were just laughing,
and waiting to be found.
And she pushed a chunk of hair behind her ear
and smiled at me and that was it.
My life has been filled with moments like that.
Moments where I felt so close to getting what I want.
But in the end, she married someone else.
Now I have another chance.
I know, it sounds stupid, right?
No. No, it's not stupid, it's sweet.
It's really sweet.
Can I tell you something and you won't judge me?
Sure.
I can't stop thinking about how soft Penelope's tongue was.
I mean are all girl's tongues that soft?
You are a girl so you have a girl's tongue in your mouth.
So, you should know, right?
It's pretty much impossible to know
if your own tongue is soft. I mean, do you know?
-Do you? -Sorry-- just-- Hey,
I was married to Penelope in one of the universes.
-Did you kiss her? -No.
Huh. Damn.
Then I would know if it's just her tongue
that's that soft or if all girl's tongues are soft.
Would that change things for you?
No, no, I don't think so. I just--
her tongue was just unexpectedly soft.
Great.
-No, no. -Oh!
-[people chattering] -[upbeat music]
Oh! Drinks, drinks, drinks, drinks.
Daph...
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
I don't think we should be here.
Can you just relax? Just for a moment
and just have some fun? Please?
Great. I'm gonna go find a costume.
Whoa, whoa, no, Daphne get--
Excuse me, ladies.
¶ Thought that we lost it ¶
[indistinct chatter]
It really looks like another key. We never really even knew--
Oh, Diggsy! I've been telling everyone about our adventure, the key and everything.
Let me introduce you. This is Franklin and Kyle.
-They're my new friends. -Sounds cool. Can we see it?
Yeah, man, show us how it works.
I don't know what she's talking about.
She says some crazy things when she's been drinking.
What? What? Diggsy!
It's mine now.
Hey, man, you should have just shown me the key.
See, now, everybody's watching and it got all weird.
-No. -I want to see how it works.
-[Diggsy] Ooh. -[man who is opening the door] Yeah...
-Uh... -[man laughs]
The back of the building.
Impressive. I'm blown away.
-Yeah. -Yeah, nothing to see.
-Try it again. -Try it again.
Try it again.
Look at this. This is amazing. The back of...
the building.
Yeah. Okay, here we go.
No, no, no.
Huh.
You're gonna bring him back, right?
He's got my keys.
-[upbeat music] -[people chattering]
Oh, you two look like you need a drink. What can I get you?
We also have our world famous uber teeny tots which are shitty.
Wait.
Daphne Ellston? [chuckles] Holy shit!
What-- uh-- When was the last time I saw you?
It was the junior year of high school? Is that right?
I don't know. Yes? Is it? I don't--
Yeah, yeah, damn, how are you?
I'm great. You, I, I love this look
-that you have going on. -Well, you look amazing.
Thank you. Oh, you know Diggsy, my brother.
-This is my brother, Diggsy. -Diggsy! I totally remember you.
I kind of had a crush on you back in the day.
You look different but you're sexy.
Oh, good. Yeah, you're great look-- Very good looking.
You look good, today.
This is great. What are you guys doing?
You want to go grab drinks, go out, catch up?
-Okay. -Yes. Total-- we, we're super-chill,
open, relaxed, so yeah, right?
-Love all-- yeah, it's good. -Yeah.
Okay, you two stay right there.
I'm gonna go grab some shots to celebrate.
-What was that? -What?
You were like totally flirty with--
-flirter pants with her. -What are you talking? No, I wasn't.
What about you? What happened to your words?
Did you lose them? Did you forget how to speak?
No-- she's...
Okay, I call this one, "Sorry about tomorrow."
Okay.
-[upbeat music] -[people chattering]
[indistinct chattering]
So, you said you were going on an adventure.
That sounds awesome. Where are you going?
Oh, um, open ended. Right, Diggsy?
We're just out exploring the universe.
Wow. The universe.
-That's awesome. -You're awesome.
-Yeah. -I love it.
So, the last guy I dated, total waste of oxygen.
A loser. All he wanted to do was stay home and play video games.
I know. And I was like, "Hello, have you seen this?
-It's nice." -Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
So, no recent girlfriends.
I find that very hard to believe.
Oh, well, he, he's been in love with the same girl
since like when he was in diapers or something.
Mm, she must be special. What's her name?
Sue-vie. Suvi.
It's different.
-She's awesome. -[chuckles] Yeah.
¶ I don't really Wanna say good night... ¶
You guys want to come back to my place?
["Wait Just A Minute" plays]
-Yeah. -¶ Falling fast for you ¶
¶ I'm falling deep ¶
¶ This is all just a dream ¶
¶ And please Don't wake me up ¶
¶ And up we go ¶
¶ Let's take the leap ¶
¶ We've got nothing to lose ¶
¶ Baby, it's just you and me ¶
¶ I know you feel the same ¶
¶ This doesn't Happen every day ¶
¶ So, if you feel the same Baby let me know it ¶
¶ Wait just a minute ¶
¶ Stay another minute now ¶
¶ I don't really want To say goodnight ¶
¶ Wait just minute now ¶
¶ Baby, I'm in it now ¶
¶ I don't really want To say goodnight ¶
¶ Wait just a minute ¶
¶ Now wait just minute ¶
¶ Now wait just a minute now ¶
¶ Wait, wait just a minute ¶
¶ Wait just a minute now ¶
¶ Stay another minute now ¶
¶ I don't really want To say goodnight ¶
¶ I don't really want To say... ¶
So, um...
things are kind of weird.
You remember the, you remember how we talked about tongues,
the tongue thing that we talked about? Yeah,
so, um...
so I now know what a girl's tongue feels like
and it is soft.
You saying you kissed her?
I'm so-- Oh, man, Diggsy, I'm so sorry.
It just happened. I mean it just, it just happened.
And, and now I-- Oh, my God!
I connected with her in a way I've never connected before.
Ever. It's like chemistry and magic and love
and math and all this goodness just wrapped up into a ball.
And you just met her yesterday.
Yeah. But-- but you know, being someone who left
his entire life in search of a girl--
Yeah, to find her. Her.
I know. Um...
I just feel like if anyone would understand the concept
of love just sinking its teeth into you,
you know, it would be you.
Diggsy, I feel terrible about it, I do.
I never meant for this to happen, you know?
Well...
-Hey, Diggsy. -Hi.
Daphne told me everything.
And, uh, I know you guys are nomads right now,
but if you wanted to just chill here for a little while and...
-Yes? -We'd love-- Yes. Right?
Cool.
Great.
[slow music]
I am gonna miss you like crazy.
Are you sure about this?
-Yeah. Yeah. -Yeah.
Yeah.
-You take care of her. -Mm-hmm.
Okay.
-[sobbing] I love you, Daphne. -I love you too.
[dramatic music]
[dramatic music continues]
[cardiac monitor beeping]
-Hi, Diggsy. -Hey.
[dramatic music continues]
It's been a few years, huh?
What made you decide to finally stop by?
That's okay, you don't have to say anything,
especially after all those phone calls you never returned.
Oh, I'm sorry.
It's been a rough year.
I'm actually glad to see you.
I'm not who you think I am.
-No? -No.
Then who are you?
Well, I'm Diggsy,
but not the Diggsy that you remember.
I've come from a parallel universe to find you.
It's a quest of sorts.
A quest? You're a knight?
[chuckles] No.
But I've been searching for a version of you
who might be interested in me
because I've loved you my whole life.
I don't know what this is, Diggsy.
I'm not really feeling very well.
So, I don't think I can help you with whatever...
crisis you seem to be going through.
And I don't-- I have no idea what you're going through
and I'm sorry. I'm very sorry.
[dramatic music continues]
Can't remember the last time you said something like that.
Let me see your arm.
You used to have a tattoo of a kitten right here.
I met Suzette when I was nine.
And she...
Diggsy, that girl you're looking for, she isn't real.
I mean, what if I'm the perfect version of Suzette?
You could be.
Diggsy,
I'm not gonna be here much longer.
You need to figure out what's really important.
And I'll give you a hint. It's not me.
Just promise me you won't be a tourist.
["To Love You" plays]
¶ Holding on to you so tight ¶
¶ Darkness leaves When you're nearby ¶
¶ To love you is life ¶
¶ Hope you'll never go away ¶
¶ Words I think But cannot say ¶
¶ To love you is life ¶
¶ I'll love you for life ¶
¶ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ¶
¶ I'll love you for life ¶
-Oops. -Shit, I'm sorry.
-I shouldn't have said 'shit.' -It's okay.
Sorry about that as well. Oh,
could I get past you? I'm late for work.
-Sorry. -[chuckles]
Sorry.
Do I know you or something?
You remind me of someone.
Really? Tell me about her.
-And it's a her, right? -Yes.
-It's kind of a long story so... -Well...
you've come to the right place because I am a long story listening specialist.
-Okay. -I'm Gwyneth.
Diggsy.
[soft music]
Watch this.
That's my bedroom.
Yeah, but, but it's not really.
And if you go in you can't come back.
Hmm.
Will you unzip me?
[soft music continues]
I have an 18-year-old bourbon that I've been saving for a special occasion.
This is special, right?
Yeah.
Mm.
That's nice.
It's even better this time around.
What?
You've done this before?
I thought you said this whole thing wasn't time travel.
It's not.
Some people are just themselves.
So, what happened the first time you drank bourbon with me?
We built a tower out of snack cakes.
That sounds about right.
[soft music]
[sighs]
[soft music continues]
What are you doing?
If I'm gonna stay I should get a job, right?
What are you looking for?
-I don't know. -You can
come work at the coffee shop with me.
Hmm. Yeah. It could be fun.
Cool.
So, uh, who's that guy?
Oh, that's Kiril.
He works here. We used to date, but it's cool.
Does he usually just stand there and brood?
Only sometimes.
I think he heard me.
I'm watching you.
You've thought about what you want to do with the key?
I'm thinking about giving it to someone.
-Who? -No idea.
-You got someone in mind? -I don't know. I mean...
-we could use it. -Yeah, maybe.
Not right now though.
I like this.
Me too.
[soft music]
[typewrites]
[upbeat music]
Hey. Uh...
did I tell you I'm thinking about writing a book about my journey?
Hmm. I like that idea.
Yeah.
Will I be in it?
Hmm. It's gonna be hard to fit you in.
-Of course. -Good.
¶ Now love is tragic ¶
¶ Who says it's so? ¶
¶ You wield your magic ¶
¶ As my heart explodes ¶
So, my mama kitty had three little kittens.
You want one, yes?
Oh, I'd, um, Kiril, I'm not...
It's Kiril. Key-real.
Uh. Right.
-We'll talk later. -Okay.
Diggsy?
Suzette.
Hi. How are you? Uh, what are you doing here?
Uh, I work here.
Yeah. I can tell.
You look great.
You look good too.
Thanks.
Um...
okay, I've thought a lot about what I was gonna say when I--
or if I saw you and uh,
I think I even wrote a speech which is--
that's embarrassing to say out loud. Uh...
but basically it was just, um...
your birthmark is gone.
Well, I just, you know, had it-- uh...
It was right here.
Diggsy, what's going on?
Uh...
Okay, well why don't we go grab a drink
and you can tell me why you're acting so strange.
I, I, I don't know if, uh--
Diggsy, I know you. I...
I...
["Loving You" plays]
Okay, let's do drinks.
Okay, uh, great, drinks.
Um, say eight o'clock tonight, the Frisky Niblet?
Sure. Yeah.
Cool. Okay, I will see you--
oh, and while I'm here-- I'll have a cookie.
Okay.
-Yeah. It looks good. -All right. See you.
¶ I can't stay away from you ¶
-Hey. -Hi.
-You okay? -Yeah.
¶ You look at me, beckoning ¶
¶ So, I'll be over soon ¶
So, you left everything for me?
Well, you know, not you, you. But yeah.
Okay.
What about your wife?
I'm not married.
-Right. -Right.
-Yeah. -He's still married
and probably having dinner with her right now.
You're just so much like him.
Do you think we share any of the same memories?
Uh... Maybe. Like what?
Mmm... Let me think.
Okay, it's your twenty-fifth birthday party,
we were very drunk, we were dancing, we started making out--
-I never kissed my Suzette. -Oh.
Although I did make out with one, though.
Okay, I got another one.
We were playing hide and go seek and I grabbed your hand
-and I pull you into the bushes. -Yeah, I got that one.
It's one of my favorites.
¶ Sun will rise ¶
¶ The stars will shine ¶
¶ You will find me Loving you ¶
¶ You know I'll be loving you ¶
Hey, sweetie. How was your night out?
It's good.
I'm glad you're making friends.
Yeah.
What are you reading?
It's an article on robots.
Did you know that most robots don't have lips?
Before we start anything too spicy--
I've something special for you.
Okay.
[sighs]
[knocking on door]
[soft music]
Hey.
Can we talk for a sec?
So, um...
something I didn't mention earlier--
wow...
my Diggsy and I, we were pretty serious.
We were engaged, actually, and I ended it.
And I've regretted it ever since.
Diggsy, I know that it wasn't me you were looking for specifically
but what if it was?
You know, me?
What if I'm the girl that you've been looking for your whole life?
[Gwyneth] Look what I got at the store today.
[tension music]
Is...
Is this Suzette?
Were you out with her tonight?
She came by the shop while you were gone
and she could tell that something was...
different.
Why are you in my house kissing my boyfriend?
-I wasn't thinking. Okay? -[Gwyneth] Stop.
Please just stop.
Hey. Hey, hey, hey. What are you doing?
You've always been in love with her
and I'm not going to spend the rest of my life
coming in second place.
I'm me. I can't be her.
I don't want you to be her.
[grunts]
Go be with her here.
You can take her, you can have a family,
you can live happily ever after.
I mean, isn't that what you always wanted?
What are you doing?
I mean you don't really even know who this girl is,
this needy girl that showed up in my house--
Needy? You don't even know me.
-Ah! -No, no, no. No.
Where did she go?
Um...
Diggsy.
I didn't understand how it works.
I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry.
Diggsy, I'm so sorry.
[dramatic music]
[dramatic music continues]
[soft music]
[soft music continues]
Did you find what you were looking for?
Yes. Sort of.
You wouldn't happen to know a place I could, you know, get a snack and dive in?
There's this quirky café around the corner called "The Werewolf Scone Society."
-[chuckles] Yeah? -Yeah.
-That's interesting. -Yeah.
Do you go there?
Yeah. They have this lavender blueberry honey
that's better than kittens.
Kittens.
Yeah.
I don't typically spread kittens on my pastries
but thank you for the suggestion.
And thank you for selling books.
Any time.
Bye.
["Columbus" plays]
¶ Late last night ¶
¶ I lost track of time ¶
¶ And I know I was waiting ¶
¶ For the sun to rise ¶
¶ These summer days ¶
¶ They keep stretching on ¶
¶ As our friend's in and out ¶
¶ Of town and tide ¶
¶ We spent all night ¶
¶ Hoping for nice things ¶
¶ We should have known ¶
¶ We don't need nice things ¶
¶ What's that, don't know Your way back home? ¶
¶ You want to know why? ¶
¶ All this time ¶
¶ When you read my mind ¶
¶ You read my mind ¶
¶ All those thoughts that ¶
¶ I knew you'd find ¶
¶ I hid between the lines ¶
¶ We could dress For anywhere else ¶
¶ Because it's been A long, long time ¶
¶ Since your kingdom fell ¶
¶ But I can hear something Over these engines ¶
¶ It sounds like ghosts In the back seat of your car ¶
¶ It sounds like our Mysteries in skin ¶
¶ Just to steal away again ¶
¶ All this time ¶
¶ When you read my mind ¶
¶ You read my mind ¶
¶ All those thoughts ¶
¶ That I knew you'd find ¶
¶ I hid between the lines ¶
¶ All this time ¶
¶ When you read my mind ¶
¶ You read my mind ¶
¶ All countries where We could have been ¶
¶ I left them all behind ¶
¶ Why would you bother The herd you're among? ¶
¶ When all that you needed was here all along? ¶
¶ All this time ¶
¶ When you read my mind ¶
¶ You read my mind ¶
¶ All those thoughts ¶
¶ That I knew you'd find ¶
¶ I hid between the lines ¶
¶ All this time ¶
¶ When you read my mind ¶
¶ You read my mind ¶
¶ All countries Where we could have been ¶
¶ We left them all behind ¶