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(Thérèse cries)
(slow music)
(Thérèse cries)
(slow music)
[Mona] (speaking French)
My Life has been a series of bad decisions
Because of this I found myself in a strange bar
in a strange country
waiting for the man who turned my heart to dogshit.
(slow music)
- May I have a glass of red wine, please?
- [Bartender] We only have Chianti.
- What kind?
- [Bartender] Chianti.
- Okay.
- This place is a dump, a real shit hole.
Yeah.
So what's your story?
- What?
- [Barry] What's your story, are you visiting?
- I just moved back to America for a bit, thank you.
- [Barry] Well, cheers to you.
(glasses clink)
- [Mona] Cheers.
- Yes.
Cheers to not being scared, I ain't scared.
I know what to do in case of a nuclear attack.
Trick is, get away from the densely populated areas,
get your ass out to the woods, like upstate,
you know, they got trees, real trees,
not this little twig.
[Mona] (speaking French) Nick was punishing me.
Making me meet him somewhere where the wine is corked.
Before I met up with him I decided to visit places
where we used to go together.
Am I a masochist.
Of course I am.
(slow music)
[Mona] (speaking French) But the places we used to go
aren't the same.
The people have grown younger while we have grown older.
(slow music)
[Mona] (speaking French) Nick would always talk about
how he felt we were like gorillas.
From the same...
What the hell do gorillas travel in?
It doesnt' matter anymore.
He called me his little cat.
How silly relationships are.
Nick was the exact opposite of the kind of guy
I thought I would fall for as a girl.
But he was so broken
I wanted to lick the pain right off his face.
(bird chirps)
[Mona] (speaking French) My mind drifted again to my father.
I will never forget when he--
- Oxygen, you know, and they clean the air,
that way you can breathe better, and think,
yeah, 'cause it's gonna get crazy, I tell you.
Shit, you know, buildings going down
in flames and shit, mm-mm.
I got me a tent, I don't even need a
domicile,
I got me a tent, I just lay out in the grass,
pop my tent, boop, I'm good.
- I don't understand, you talk so fast.
- Well, better to talk fast than not at all.
You're not into that, huh, talking?
Yeah.
You got the face for quietness,
you ain't gotta say a word.
(slow music)
- Okay, Barry.
Move.
* I'll wait forever
* Even though it's the end of the world *
- [Bartender] Hey, beer and a shot?
- Hi.
* Even though it's the end of the *
* World
- I wanted to talk to you.
I wrote a play.
It's about us.
And I would like you to read it.
(siren wails)
- Okay, all right.
- Look, it's honest.
- It's confessional.
- Is there a difference?
- Yeah, honesty's hard.
- Okay.
The lead actress, she wants to meet you,
she thinks it would help her to discover her character,
and I think it will help her, too.
Obviously it would be a tremendous favor to me.
Maybe you owe me a favor.
Look.
I know how things are between us,
but you know how much it means to me.
I've been writing the play my entire life.
- You gonna take your shoes off, or what?
- There's no time for naked feet. (laughs)
- [Nick] Come on, make yourself comfortable.
- Listen,
it's.
(Mona sighs)
It's about my father, too, it's about,
it's about what happened when I went back to France.
You throw it away before that part.
- All right, all right, show me a picture.
- [Mona] Of who?
- Of the actress.
- You want to see if she's pretty?
- You jealous?
- [Mona] She's pretty.
- All right, I'll make you a deal.
I'll meet her if you have sex with me one last time.
(Mona scoffs)
(Nick laughs)
- Oh, that's a good joke.
- [Nick] I'm serious, come on.
- [Mona] I know you're serious.
- [Nick] I'm just trying to help you out,
I want to see if she's a good actor or not,
you know, can she act like you, can she fuck like you?
- And you made yourself sick, your breath smells like death.
- You miss your gorilla, though.
- No.
- You don't miss your gorilla?
- I don't miss my gorilla.
(Mona laughs)
Don't do the gorilla.
- I told you no shoes. (grunts)
- You will come to see the play, won't you?
You will come to see it?
(slow music)
- Take off your shoes.
[Mona] (speaking French) Nick taught me to be impulsive.
We would throw parties, then escape to have sex outside.
I would imagine he was a stranger, which got me so wet.
But I knew I was safe because it was him.
My big gorilla.
Now he is really a stranger.
- It's honest.
- It's confessional.
- Is there a difference?
- You take the most, I'm sorry, can we do it again?
Ugh, the grad thing's weird.
[Mona] (speaking French) The next day in rehearsal,
I could barely hold myself together.
[Chris] The grad thing, I'm just trying to figure out how
to make it feel, it feels kind of corny, but.
- [Thérèse] It's honest.
- [Chris] It's confessional.
- [Thérèse] Is there a difference?
- You take the most intimate details from our lives,
you twist it around to where I'm the bad guy,
and then you don't even do me the basic courtesy
of telling me about it, is there a difference?
Sorry, what are we doing?
Hey.
- I'm sorry. - You all right?
- [Mona] Yeah.
(slow music)
[Mona] (speaking French) Some men make you cry,
others let you cry on them.
- [Chris] Cheers.
- Cheers.
(slow music)
Thank you for helping me through today.
The director is supposed to treat the actors like babies,
not the other way around.
- Oh, don't feel bad about it,
the material's hard, you know, it's your life.
- Yeah, my life, I have some imagination, don't I?
- I have to tell you, I think that
what you're doing with this play, it's really--
- Boring.
- No.
- Predictable.
- No.
- Self-indulgent, exploitative, cruel?
- No,
brave,
I could never put my life
on the line like that, I mean,
nothing has ever really happened in my life, anyway.
(slow ambient music)
(Mona laughs)
(slow ambient music)
(Chris laughs)
(Mona laughs)
- [Chris] I can only cum during sex
if I know I'm gonna get my heart broken.
- Do you have a room?
- It's too far.
Is this a bad idea?
(Mona laughs)
Ow, fuck.
- I just want, like, when you see a baby,
you want to bite him.
- Oh. (exhales sharply)
Usually, when I actually love a girl,
I have a hard time, you know, lasting, I did my best
to make sure I didn't embarrass myself with Mona.
I thought of my roommate clipping his toenails,
but it didn't matter,
the sex was just too intense for her, she fell asleep.
(slow music)
I wanted to keep fucking for sure,
I hadn't come from a woman in months,
but just watching her sleep, that was enough.
(slow music)
Usually when I watch girls sleep in my bed,
they just look like aliens, it's weird
to sleep next to an alien, but Mona,
she felt like a human, she felt like my kind of human.
- [Speaker] Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
Feel free to ponder this age old question
as you let the eggs fry in the pan.
It's important to give yourself a break,
just watch the eggs. (background noise drowns out speaker)
Don't need to think about it, it's a beautiful sight,
isn't it, just enjoy it, don't think.
- I heard a corny joke the other day.
(construction rumbles)
- I need a coffee.
- [Chris] Coffee.
(Mona yawns)
Did you sleep all right?
- I had a dream
I was a
black widow spider.
- Mm-hmm?
- [Mona] They kill their mates, you know?
- That's neat.
Fuck, ah!
(construction rumbles)
I had met Mona at a party
at her ex-boyfriend's house after one of her plays,
it was a really personal play,
and I told her that I liked it.
Looking at her was like looking at a sunset,
it gave me a boner.
- On the Uber ride here, we passed this liquor store,
Raul's Liquor, and I just thought to myself,
like, who is Raul, you know, like what is his story,
what is his day like, you know,
a liquor store would be a great setting for (mumbles).
- [Woman] Totally.
- Raul doesn't want you tell his story,
Raul just wants you to buy his beer.
(slow music)
(moves into upbeat poppy music)
What did you like about my play?
- I thought it was self-deprecating
without being self-indulgent.
(upbeat poppy music)
- You get a gold star.
(upbeat poppy music)
(traffic rumbles)
(Nick moans)
(dog barks)
(construction rumbles)
- Whoa, that's too much food to eat.
- I had to make breakfast for myself, anyway.
(construction rumbles)
Are the eggs okay?
- Oh, I don't like eggs.
- [Chris] Oh.
- Sorry.
(construction rumbles)
(slow music)
- [Chris] It was honestly one
of the best mornings of my life.
(slow music)
The only problem was when I went inside,
my pee really hurt.
- [Doctor] Unfortunately, you've tested positive
for gonorrhea, we do have an antibiotic
for you to take, the next step is for you
to notify any sexual partners you've had
in the last 60 days.
- Well, you didn't get it from me,
I get checked constantly.
- I'm not accusing you, I'm just telling you
what I have to tell you, the fact
that you get checked constantly is a little--
- [Hannah] I'm not gonna let you shame me.
You know, underneath this mister-nice-guy act
is a real passive aggressive asshole, I see through it.
(slow music)
- [Chris] I don't care what Hannah says, I'm a good guy,
deep down, when it counts, in a life
or death situation, like when a ship's sinking,
I help the women and children first.
It was clear Mona was developing real feelings for me,
so I needed to give her the news the right way,
I planned on making my puppy dog face when I told her.
- Oh, hey, you're the guy from the show, right,
the Clown Academy?
- Yeah.
- Why aren't you doing that anymore?
- They killed my character.
Yep, the puppy dog face, my secret weapon,
my ace in the hole.
(slow music)
- [Man In Black] Hey, can I have a cigarette?
- Sorry, this is my last one, man.
- [Man In Black] Please, just one cigarette?
- [Chris] Sorry.
- [Man In Black] Oh, please?
- [Chris] To the outside world, it looks spontaneous,
but only I know it's totally calculated,
I control my every tick, why don't I get more work?
(slow music)
Fuck, I gotta learn my lines.
(slow music)
At another time in my life, I probably would have gotten
with Thérèse just to do it, but now I'm a one woman guy,
and I don't want to lead her on.
Yeah, good guy.
- Are you uncomfortable
with me?
- No, no, I'm just having a weird day, I was at the doctor--
- Nothing serious, I hope.
- No, it was just the flu.
- Mm.
Few.
- No, the flu.
- No, no, no, I mean the few,
like,
a few.
You know? - Oh, yeah, that's good.
- Should we try the kiss?
- Yeah.
All right, let's do the whole thing.
- [Thérèse] Yeah.
- I guess I would expect nothing less from you.
- [Thérèse] It's honest.
- It's confessional.
- [Thérèse] Is there a difference?
- Yeah, honesty's hard.
- [Mona] Hi.
(birds chirp)
- Hey.
- Okay, so you must be Thérèse, right?
- [Thérèse] You must be Nick.
- You look nice.
Well, shall we?
- Yeah, okay.
See you tomorrow.
- Bye.
- [Chris] You walk so fast,
you'd think you're from New York.
I knew I had to tell her about the gonorrhea at some point,
it was looming over me all day.
Hey, I never told you that joke,
it's kind of corny, but it goes--
- [Mona] I'm writing.
- [Chris] What's that?
- I'm writing, in my head, I'm writing in my head.
Sometimes when I walk, I'm writing in my head,
it's nothing personal, it's just, you know.
- Yeah, say no more, do your thing.
I'd tell her when we got inside,
that way I could do my puppy dog face.
I knew I had to tell her before we had sex, though.
Okay, I would tell her after we had sex.
You're so beautiful.
- [Mona] Don't say that.
- [Chris] Oh, I'm sorry.
- [Mona] Stop apologizing, you little pussy.
- [Chris] That was it, I lose all control
when girls talk to me like I'm dirt, I tried to think fast.
(traffic rumbles)
You're seriously kicking me out right now?
- Yeah, I'm feeling very confused,
I have to wake up early tomorrow morning.
- Can you understand why I might
be feeling suicidal right now?
- Yeah, okay, I feel that way all the time,
you go on living, or you don't.
I can't stand here all night going in circles with you.
- I know, but I feel like we just have
to address this thing between us.
- What, but the only thing between us is this door.
(door slams)
(door knocks)
I told her, you can't spend the night here.
- I have to tell you something.
- What?
What on earth are you doing with that face?
- Huh?
(door slams)
(slow country music)
Hey, Kelly, how's it going?
- [Kelly] Not bad, not bad.
- Is Hannah working tonight?
- [Kelly] Later, you want me to tell her you stopped by?
- No, I'll just hang out,
can I get a Jameson on the rocks when you get a chance?
- [Kelly] You got it.
(slow country music)
- How's it going?
And it's, like, very hard to be attracted
to somebody that's attracted to you, it's like
your tastes seem to be very shitty,
and that's, you know, taste matters.
- [Man] Man, what do you do for work, for a living?
- Nothing, worse than nothing, I'm an actor.
- [Kelly] Hey, Hannah's not coming in,
she said something about an audition.
- Yeah, of course.
Can I have one more?
- [Kelly] Coming up.
(slow music)
- [Chris] What do you do for work?
- [Man] Sanitation.
(slow music)
- Cheers.
(glasses clink)
I knew I shouldn't call her, I'm a good guy,
really, deep down, when it counts,
when the ship is sinking, women and children first,
women and children-- - Howdy, stranger.
- [Chris] Hi.
- [Thérèse] Did I say that right?
- [Chris] Yeah, it was perfect, thanks for coming.
- [Thérèse] Mm-hmm.
- [Chris] Cheers.
- Yeah.
(slow music)
You shouldn't drink when you have the flu.
(slow music)
- [Chris] What the fuck are you talking about?
Kelly, have one more, and what do you want?
(Thérèse cries out)
- Are you okay?
- [Chris] Yeah.
- Did you finish?
- No.
I'm a good guy.
When it counts.
(phone dials)
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French) Hello.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Mommy, guess what?
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French) Another Crush?
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Don't be so condescending!
This one is serious.
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French) How serious?
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Let's just put it this way:
I made him breakfast this morning.
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French) You cooked for him?
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Yes!
You will never see him again.
(slow music)
What?
Oh. (Thérèse laughs)
- [Thérèse] Time to start the day.
- [Chris] Great.
- Handsome.
I hope you don't mind, I watched you sleep for a few hours.
- That's fine.
- [Thérèse] What?
- You watched me sleep for a few hours?
- You snore like a grizzly.
(Thérèse imitates biting)
(Thérèse laughs)
- [Chris] Fuck.
- Are you okay?
- [Chris] Yeah, I just need, like--
- Advil?
- Yeah.
- [Thérèse] Water?
Bread.
- [Chris] Bread?
- Eat up so (mumbles).
(Thérèse mumbles)
when we were having.
- Sex. - Yes!
Do you remember what you said?
- [Chris] Hmm?
- Do you remember what you said?
- Thérèse, I don't really remember anything
about last night.
It was black out, do you understand black out, black out?
- Yeah, black out.
- Yeah, yeah, I don't want this.
Black out.
- Silly grizzly.
Come on, let's take a shower.
- I'm fine, thank you though.
- [Thérèse] Oh, no fun.
- [Chris] Yeah.
- Come on, let's get clean.
- No, I can't, I'm a shower every other day guy,
today's an off day, I can't break the rotation,
I have sensitive skin.
- Sensitive to what?
- To water.
- Oh.
If you want to join me, there's plenty of room. (laughs)
(water patters)
(slow music)
Are they horrible?
- No, no.
Not horrible.
- Yeah.
(slow music)
I was raised with chefs in the house,
so I never really learned how to cook.
(slow music)
But I'm trying.
(slow music)
- I think I'm gonna leave, I'm not really feeling very well.
Thanks for breakfast, though.
- [Thérèse] Wait.
- [Chris] Look, I know
that we should probably talk about what--
- I was just going to ask for a kiss.
- Oh.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) For Your Information, mother,
he loved the breakfast I made him.
- Five, six, seven, eight.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) She told me not to tell
any of the other students but she said I'm top of the class.
Hey, Thérèse, I don't know what you're doing here,
but you just gotta get out of your head,
okay, and just feel it.
- [Thérèse] Yeah.
- One, two, three, and four,
one, two, three, and four, five, and six.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) It's not about the dancing,
though, I've made so many great friends in class.
Three and four, five and six, seven and eight,
now go to your left, two, three, four.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Mommy, I love daddy,
but why couldn't you have had me with a black man?
[Thérèse Mother] (speaking French) I'm not having
this conversation again. Tell me about your friends.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) They're so wonderful.
Liz is so sweet and caring.
She's a good listener,
and she makes sure everything is fair.
- Everyone should get a little piece.
- Great, a half of a half of a piece of cheese.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) And Joyce is so strong
and sassy, just like the ones on TV.
- [Joyce] So T.
- What?
- [Joyce] Any new developments on the Chris front?
- Not really.
- [Joyce] Oh.
- I think he likes Mona, and I think she likes him back.
And yesterday, he had a big bite that I think came from her.
- So what, swoop in there,
no way that bitch is cuter than you.
- This bitch may not be cuter than me,
but she's a more beautiful bitch than I, inside and out.
- She's probably confusing her feelings
for Chris with her feelings for her ex-boyfriend.
- Maybe.
- You know what you should do?
- [Thérèse] What?
- You should wait for this whole crazy-ass play to be over,
then Mona's gonna see she doesn't have any real feelings
for Chris, unless he's playing her ex-boyfriend.
Then, when she dumps his ass, he's gonna be all,
"Oh, woe is me," then who's gonna be there,
waiting on the rebound?
- You. (laughs)
- So you're, you're saying I should go on a date
with Mona's ex-boyfriend to make her jealous?
- That's literally not even close to what I just said.
- Then Chris will be all mine for the rebound.
- [Liz] But see, you've got it all wrong.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) So I decided
to go ahead with Joyce's plan.
I called Mona for an emergency meeting.
I told her I wanted to meet her ex
so I could better understand my character.
At first, she was resistant to the idea,
but I eventually convinced her.
She even thanked me for caring so much about the project.
Introduce me or I quit.
(slow music)
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French) Thérèse, remember
in grade school when you called the girlfriends of boys
you liked and told them they were dead?
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Yes, I was so young and silly.
- Hey, Ms. Independence, you look good today.
- Thank you.
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French)
No one liked you after that, remember?
Remember how much you cried
when the whole school shunned you?
How you slept in my bed for a year after?
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Mother,
Stop using the past against me!
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French) I just don't want
you to get hurt again.
You don't get hurt like other people, you come undone, baby.
You become dangerous to yourself.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Oh, mommy! You worry too much.
(slow music)
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Chris has such a beautiful
beard. It's clean, perfectly trimmed --
Like the pubic hair of a respectable woman.
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French) Oh, cookie.
Don't make an old woman puke.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) And his hands --
They are strong, capable, but not paw-like like daddy's.
And he has the most beautiful eyes you've ever seen.
So much mystery behind them.
You want to jump into them naked and drown.
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French) Baby, remember your
co-star in that dreadful rendition of Three Sisters?
You said the same thing about his eyes.
And your co-star in that deodorant commercial?
You said the same thing about his eyes.
Even that boy who played Romeo to your Juliet in 6th grade--
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Oh, mother!
Would you stop living in the past?
Should we try the kiss?
- Yeah.
(slow music)
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Chris is different.
When we kissed, it was like a million fireworks went off
inside me all at once.
With the other boys, it was just like...toy sparklers.
(slow music)
That night, I was rehearsing my lines --
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French) What about your date
with Mona's ex-boyfriend?
Did you actually go through with it?
Huh?
- You must be Nick.
(slow music)
I just want to understand the relationship from your point
of view so I can tell the story more truthfully.
It's your story, too.
- Who gives a shit?
- I give a shit.
(slow music)
Bite me, bite me.
- [Nick] Hmm?
- Would you, would you bite me?
I like to be bitten.
Yeah.
Yes.
Ow!
- What?
- [Thérèse] Not that hard.
- I'm sorry. - Did you leave a mark?
- [Nick] I mean, yeah.
Maybe.
Hey. - Okay.
You dirty old man.
- What?
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Oh, yes.
It was relatively painless.
Anyway, that night I was rehearsing my lines
when out of the blue Mona Skyped me.
(computer rings)
[Thérèse] Hello?
Mona (speaking French) Thérèse, can you hear me?
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Yes. I hear you.
- Cool.
(speaking French) How do you make the box
that shows my face disappear?
[Thérèse] (speaking French) I don't know.
(speaking French) I only want to see you.
Your beautiful. You really are.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Are you okay?
(speaking French) I may have just driven a man to suicide.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Oh, I'm sorry.
And I ate some pot brownies.
Have you ever smoked pot?
How often do you get drunk?
Almost never
I'm a square, I guess.
(speaking French) How was your date with Nick?
I don't care, don't tell me.
I just wanted to see your face.
Your beautiful face...
[Mona] (speaking French) Touch my finger.
Anyway, I'm actually glad
you made me see my ex the other night
I wrote a new scene based on the experience.
Oh, fantastic!
It might suck because I'm stoned.
Do you think you can have it memorized by tomorrow?
Yes, but it depends on how many pages it is--
Great.
(Thérèse sighs)
- You drink to have had happiness, you know why, because,
okay, you dreamed to have had happiness, you know why,
because in order to be happy, one
must first be brave, one must first be brave.
You drink to avoid happiness,
you know why, because in order to be happy,
one must first be brave, yeah, you could let go
of your misery if you-- (phone rings)
Hello?
- [Chris] Hey.
(slow guitar music)
- Howdy, stranger.
- Hey.
- [Thérèse] Did I say that right?
- Yeah, no, that was perfect.
Thanks for coming.
- [Thérèse] Mm-hmm.
- Cheers. - Yeah.
You shouldn't drink when you have the flu.
- What the fuck are you talking about?
Can I get one more, and what do you want?
- I'll just have a pinot grigio.
- [Kelly] You got it.
- Thank you.
So?
Have you read the new lines?
- [Chris] The new lines?
- [Thérèse] Mm-hmm.
- [Chris] We open in a week.
- Yeah, Mona had yet another burst of inspiration.
- [Chris] Fucking bitch, you know, some people,
if you're not as fucked up as they are,
then they're just, you're uninteresting to them,
you know, you're worse than that, you're disposable.
- Did she give you that bite?
- [Chris] If you're decent, you're disposable.
- I have a bite, too.
(slow music)
You drink to avoid happiness,
you know why?
Because in order to be happy, one must first be brave.
You could let go of your misery if you wanted to,
but you won't.
(slow music)
(Chris moans)
- [Chris] I love you.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) He said he loves me, Mommy!
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French) Well I'm glad
you met someone.
Just try not to get carried away this time.
I won't always be here to pick up the pieces.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Oh, mommy, don't say that!
You'll be around for a good long while.
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French) Thérèse, sweetie,
you must accept the reality of the situation.
Chemo only prolongs the inevitable--
[Thérèse] (speaking French) La, La, La! Okay mommy,
I should go rehearse.
I'll send you some photos of Chris sleeping.
You should have heard him snore. My big grizzly.
[Thérèse's Mother] (speaking French) Okay.
I cant' wait to see him. Love you, baby.
[Thérèse] (speaking French) Love You!
(slow dreamy music)
- [Narrator] The day after Nick's 10th wedding anniversary,
he found himself day drinking in the park.
He was taking pictures of old people,
thinking about how he himself would soon be old,
forgotten, unable to remember the things he once wanted
to do, as he contemplated his own demise,
two girls with perfect skin appeared,
seemingly out of nowhere, one was Chilean,
and exuded a youthful confidence
that Nick could only understand as arrogance.
"She probably fucks rock stars, and eats organic candy,
"and practices some bastardized form of meditation
"that requires no work," these were the thoughts
that raced through Nick's head as he took her picture
with the intention of jerking off to it later.
Her friend, though, had sad eyes,
she wore a dumb hat, and her name was Mona.
They went to a bar, the Chilean took off
because she couldn't keep up with him.
Mona talked excessively about her own life,
she was a good storyteller, she had a dark sense
of humor, of someone who's lived, and boy, could she drink.
(slow music)
(Nick laughs)
Nick began spending a dangerous amount of time with Mona.
They would sit on the same park bench for hours on end,
taking pictures of crazy people.
(slow music)
(background noise drowns out speaker)
Mona was the first woman that seemed
to genuinely like Nick since his wife,
but his wife had long since realized the charms she saw
in Nick as a younger person were entirely imagined.
She no longer supported his photography, or choice
in facial hair, Mona, Nick thought, understood him
for the sweaty, misunderstood genius beast he was,
mostly, though, she was just so beautiful.
- I'm still going through changes you've been
through yourself,
you know?
You'll always be 10 steps ahead of me.
- See, what you just said, that was amazing,
I could have never formulated a thought like
that at your age.
So you're mature for your age, I'm immature for mine.
- Come on, that's every guy who's dating
a younger girl will say that, it's so cliche.
- Well, then I'm a cliche.
- [Mona] Yeah, you're a cliche.
- I don't mind being a cliche if that means being with you.
- I don't think you should leave your wife.
(thunder rumbles)
(car door slams)
(rain patters)
(car door slams)
(slow music)
- Hey, Gorilla.
- [Nick] Hey.
- Oh, you're hanging your pictures like I told you to.
(slow music)
- Uh-oh, oh, it's dripping, oh, shit.
Oh, it's gonna drip on you, oh, no, I didn't mean
to do that, I just held my ice cream over your face.
- [Mona] Why we took this, it's, is just,
I don't like vanilla, I prefer chocolate.
- [Henry] Van-iy-a?
- [Nick] Van-i-ya.
- [Mona] Did I say van-i-ya?
- [Nick] No.
- [Mona] Did you say what?
- What the fuck is van-iy-a?
- I want to put vanilla on your nose.
- No, stop.
- [Mona] I don't want it anymore, can I give it to you?
- Stop.
- [Nick] Uh-oh.
- Stop.
- You just didn't, once you push like,
once you see it's not--
- [Mona] I didn't say anything.
- [Nick] Oh, I know, he's.
- [Mona] Should I try to go and get him?
- [Nick] No, he gets really angry.
You okay, dude?
- [Mona] Are you okay?
- What?
- [Mona] Are you okay?
- [Henry] Mm-hmm.
- I'm sorry.
- [Narrator] Nick could feel Mona growing disinterested
by the complications of his very adult life,
so he tried to integrate himself into her world.
* My times will turn to guns
* If I find Brad had sex
(moves into slow ambient music)
(moves into slow acoustic guitar music)
(background noise drowns out speaker)
- What?
- [Nick] Yes, what do you mean?
Why are you making me sound like the fucking idiot?
- [Mona] You're crazy about this, it's--
- [Nick] Oh, I'm crazy about this?
- I never said that.
- I'm Chris, by the way.
I never got to tell you how much I loved that play.
- [Mona] How long is this shithead is gonna be,
I'm gonna piss my pants.
(slow music)
- You're not wearing any pants.
- [Mona] What?
- [Chris] You're not wearing any pants.
- No, just these beautiful tights,
it would be so sad if I got piss all over them.
I really need to go back home, I need to take care of him.
- [Nick] How long will you be gone?
- My mom's just completely abandoned him, there's no one.
He's my father, and he's drinking himself to death now.
- [Phone] Please leave a message after the beep.
(phone beeps)
- Hey, Mona, yeah, it's me.
I know you're going through a lot, but,
I mean, can you at least call me back?
I mean, I haven't talked to you in, like, over a month.
(phone beeps)
Hold on, that's you, disregard this message.
(phone beeps)
Hey.
Mona?
(Mona laughs)
Mona.
(slow music)
I swear to god, if this is a butt dial,
I'm gonna fucking lose it, Mona!
Fuck!
- [Narrator] Nick knew Mona couldn't abandon her father,
but he couldn't go a moment
without imagining her being fucked by some dirty Frenchman.
(speaking in foreign language)
- And, you know. (speaking in foreign language)
- Yeah, you have a lot of moles, you know, but why not?
- [Woman] That's about all I know.
(speaking in foreign language)
- [Man] You know. (speaking in foreign language)
(speaking in foreign language)
- Bonjour!
- Sorry, (laughs) let's go home.
- Bonjour!
- [Barry] Let's go outside, get some air.
- Bonjour!
Get some air, let's get some air.
- [Narrator] When she returned from France, Nick vowed
to end it, no matter what, his dignity depended on it.
- Your stuff's packed up over there.
(baby wails)
What?
- My father died.
(baby wails)
(Mona cries)
- [Narrator] And just like that, it was as
though the past six months had never even happened.
(slow guitar music)
it seemed like Nick might be living out his own version
of a happy ending.
Then Mona casually mentioned she had an affair in France.
(camera shutter clicks)
(slow ambient music)
She claimed it was born out of emotional distress,
and the whole ordeal just made her realize
how much she needed him.
(slow ambient music)
(camera shutter clicks)
(slow ambient music)
He wanted to forgive her, he tried to forgive her,
but every time he closed his eyes.
(camera shutter clicks)
(slow ambient music)
- [Mona] Nick.
- [Nick] What'd you say?
- [Mona] What?
- [Nick] It sounded like you just said Nico.
- [Mona] What?
- [Nick] You just said Nico.
- [Mona] I said Nick.
- [Narrator] One morning, Nick woke up
to find a note from Mona, she hadn't dotted her Is
with hearts like she usually did.
The note read, "To my big gorilla,
"it was nice to share a dream with you,
"but now I am awake, I wish there was some way
"of doing this to hurt you less.
"I wish I didn't care about you, but I do.
"I begged you not to make me your home.
"What do you have to go back to now?"
- Hey, Henry.
Henry!
(slow music)
Henry.
Hey.
- What the hell are you doing?
- I'm here to pick up Henry, where is he?
- No, no, keep your voice down,
you were supposed to be here hours ago, and you're drunk.
You're drunk.
- I don't care, he's my fucking son, where--
- Go inside, listen, Nick, come on,
let's make this nice, come on.
- All right, I'm very peaceful,
I'm just going up to get my son.
- [Jerry] I don't--
- I'm just going up to get my son.
- [Jerry] Let's not make it uncomfortable, all right?
Stay composed, composure.
- All right, you make a very good point, Jerry,
all right, you win, I'll see you later,
this is inappropriate, I'm sorry.
(overlapping chatter)
(Nick groans)
- [Jerry] Now, get up, get up, get up.
- [Nick] You fucking hurt me, I'll fucking.
(background noise drowns out speaker)
- [Jerry] Nick, Nick, please, Nick, please.
- [Nick] Wait, no.
- [Jerry] Close the door, close the door, close the door.
- Come on, come on,
I'll fuck my way through you to get to my son.
(slow music)
(overlapping chatter)
- [Nick] Hey, thanks for setting me up
with that crazy bitch the other night.
Look, I just wanted to let you know
I'm not gonna come tonight, I guess I'm supposed
to wish you luck or something.
I hope this play helps you get over
whatever you need to get over.
Wear some lipstick tonight, oh,
and I might have given you gonorrhea.
(phone beeps)
(Chris vomits)
- Howdy.
- Hey.
- Pre-show jitters?
Maybe I can help you to get rid of them.
- I just have to do some breathing exercises, so.
- Are you okay? - Yeah.
- You're shaking.
- I can't do this.
- What do you mean? - I mean, I'm not an actor.
- Of course you are. - No, no.
Some guys overheard me imitating my parents at a mall
when I was 16, put me in a Saturday morning kid's show,
and I'm just bullshitting ever since then,
but I haven't been on stage since I was in the sixth grade.
- I'm sure you were great. - I was a tree.
- I'm sure you were a great tree.
- I just feel like if I blow this, then I will,
I'm not gonna be able to come back, you know?
- Aw, silly grizzly.
You're good, okay?
It's your lack of energy that makes you exciting,
and you have me to guide you.
- [Chris] Mm-hmm.
- What more could you ask for?
- Just finish quick.
- What, what was that?
- What was what?
Hey.
(Chris sighs)
(Thérèse cries)
- Of course.
Your big night,
your big premier,
everything you wrecked our lives for,
everything you wrecked your own life for has come
to fruition, and how are you handling it?
Like a little baby, in way over her head, like always?
You should just stay down.
I'd cry too if I were you, whole self image wrapped up
in this grand notion you have of yourself as a writer,
and yet you're incapable of writing
about anything except yourself, now, is that writing,
or is that just publicly crying?
The world is going to shit, not in some far off,
abstract way, but in real ways
that affect the lives of people you know,
and yet you refuse to look outward
because you're so goddamned interesting.
- [Thérèse] I thought you loved me.
- You're like a drug, you're like a drug
that re-enters my life--
- I thought, I thought, I thought you, you loved me.
- [Chris] You're like a drug that re-enters my life.
You're like a drug that re-enters my life
after I've gone through all the--
- [Thérèse] Can you forget the line--
- [Chris] You're like--
- [Thérèse] Can you be real,
do you have a real in you, do you?
- You're like a drug that--
- [Thérèse] You said you loved me.
- You're like a drug that re-enters my life after--
- [Thérèse] You said you loved me.
- I.
(Thérèse cries)
You're like a drug--
- [Thérèse] Why did you say that?
Why did you say you loved me?
- Because I fucking meant it.
I always have.
Fuck this guy, come on, kitty, you can do this, all right?
Come on, you got this, let's do the material justice.
- [Thérèse] I can't, I'm covered in snot,
and I don't have a tissue, okay? (coughs)
- [Nick] Here, use this.
Hey.
Come on.
(slow music)
The show must go on.
- I thought you hated this play.
- [Nick] It's honest.
- It's confessional.
- [Nick] What's the difference?
- Honesty is hard, I never really got the hang of it.
- Hey, neither did I.
(slow music)
- When you left your wife
without telling me--
- I felt obligated to at least give us a shot.
But I know, you weren't really ready to settle down.
- Our
entire relationship,
I never really needed you,
that's probably what attracted you to me,
and
when
I finally
did need you,
you weren't there.
- [Nick] When I think about what happened
when you went back to France, what your father did to you,
I get so mad, I don't know what to do.
- The only way I knew how to deal with it was
to turn my mind off,
and follow my body.
It led me
to other bad places,
it led me to other men,
sometimes it felt, it felt good.
Sometimes it,
it didn't, but,
in the end,
it was
the coping mechanism, and nothing more.
(slow music)
I tried to make you understand.
But you, you wouldn't listen.
- When we talked about it, it made it real, and I had
to push it down, that's why I started drinking like crazy,
it made it easier for me to twist things so that,
you know, I saw you as the bad guy.
It was easier for me to see you as the bad guy,
instead of the victim that you were,
but we don't have to be defined by what we did.
All this time alone, I've realized
that waking up without you is like not waking up at all,
I'm old, I'm tired, but I promise you,
all I want to do is take care of you, be there for you.
Please, Mona, what do you say?
How about a happy ending?
(lively piano music)
(audience applauds)
(audience cheers)
[Mona] (speaking French) My Life has been a series
of bad decisions
Perhaps I thought I could make my life story worth telling,
I could make it a life worth living as well.
I say his name a hundred times a day.
(slow music)