1 00:00:30,010 --> 00:00:33,067 When you play the game of life, you've got trouble, you've got strife 2 00:00:33,317 --> 00:00:36,500 Jack o' Diamonds is a hard card to find 3 00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:39,908 Life's like a game of cards, but it's very, very hard 4 00:00:40,008 --> 00:00:43,733 Jack o' Diamonds is a hard card to find 5 00:00:43,833 --> 00:00:45,425 Jack o' Diamonds 6 00:00:45,525 --> 00:00:49,583 Jack o' Diamonds, Diamonds Is a hard card to find 7 00:00:50,483 --> 00:00:52,033 Jack o' Diamonds 8 00:00:52,133 --> 00:00:56,083 Jack o' Diamonds, Diamonds Is a hard card to find 9 00:01:09,933 --> 00:01:11,425 Jack o' Diamonds 10 00:01:11,525 --> 00:01:16,517 Jack o' Diamonds, Diamonds Is a hard card to find 11 00:01:16,617 --> 00:01:18,158 Jack o' Diamonds 12 00:01:18,258 --> 00:01:22,517 Jack o' Diamonds, Diamonds Is a hard card to find 13 00:01:22,617 --> 00:01:25,766 Well, they say that ace is high, but I know that that's a lie 14 00:01:25,866 --> 00:01:29,075 Jack o' Diamonds is a hard card to find 15 00:01:29,175 --> 00:01:32,508 The Queen of Hearts is way above 'cause her heart is singing love 16 00:01:32,608 --> 00:01:36,333 Jack o' Diamonds is a hard card to find 17 00:01:36,433 --> 00:01:37,963 Jack o' Diamonds 18 00:01:38,063 --> 00:01:43,025 Jack o' Diamonds, Diamonds Is a hard card to find 19 00:01:43,125 --> 00:01:44,632 Jack o' Diamonds 20 00:01:44,732 --> 00:01:48,817 Jack o' Diamonds, Diamonds Is a hard card to find 21 00:01:49,417 --> 00:01:52,733 Diamonds is a hard card to find 22 00:01:52,833 --> 00:01:58,725 Diamonds is a hard card to find 23 00:02:02,942 --> 00:02:05,275 There you go, lads! First one's on me. 24 00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:07,142 - Thanks, Paul. - Cheers. 25 00:02:07,242 --> 00:02:09,977 I definitely missed a couple of notes in that solo. 26 00:02:10,077 --> 00:02:12,658 I'm tellin' ya, I didn't notice. 27 00:02:12,758 --> 00:02:15,392 - Three rum and coke, please. - Comin' right up. 28 00:02:15,892 --> 00:02:18,342 - Hey. - Hey. 29 00:02:18,442 --> 00:02:22,383 - Nice set. - Thanks a lot. 30 00:02:22,783 --> 00:02:24,375 I like your glasses. 31 00:02:24,475 --> 00:02:25,528 - Yeah? - Yeah. 32 00:02:25,628 --> 00:02:29,469 - Not too hipster? - It's a fine line. 33 00:02:31,052 --> 00:02:32,997 So you're into skiffle? 34 00:02:33,097 --> 00:02:36,575 Yeah. Yeah, well, didn't have the hair for disco. 35 00:02:39,242 --> 00:02:41,483 - What about you? - Yeah, love it. 36 00:02:41,583 --> 00:02:43,342 - Really? - Who wouldn't! 37 00:02:43,442 --> 00:02:45,199 It's not everyone's thing, 38 00:02:45,299 --> 00:02:47,933 but my folks used to play it all the time, Lonnie Donegan... 39 00:02:48,033 --> 00:02:49,560 She is so great. 40 00:02:51,842 --> 00:02:53,724 Yeah. Right. 41 00:02:55,317 --> 00:02:58,580 - What? - Nothing. Just... 42 00:02:59,180 --> 00:03:00,652 Lonnie Donegan was a bloke. 43 00:03:02,258 --> 00:03:03,916 Oh, right, yeah. 44 00:03:06,850 --> 00:03:09,017 - I mean, it's no big deal. - Sure. 45 00:03:09,117 --> 00:03:11,225 - It was nothing. - I know. 46 00:03:12,125 --> 00:03:13,105 - Cool. - Yeah. 47 00:03:13,205 --> 00:03:15,483 - Great. - You know what? It's fine. 48 00:03:15,583 --> 00:03:16,991 Forget it. 49 00:03:19,100 --> 00:03:20,991 Asshole! 50 00:03:22,100 --> 00:03:24,258 You know, somewhere the ghost of Lonnie Donegan 51 00:03:24,358 --> 00:03:26,742 is wondering why you have a dick and he hasn't. 52 00:03:27,508 --> 00:03:30,517 Yeah, we're not doing gigs like this for the money, man. 53 00:03:30,617 --> 00:03:32,449 Do your girlfriends know that, do they? 54 00:03:34,125 --> 00:03:36,870 Just want a bit of honesty. Is that too much to ask? 55 00:03:36,970 --> 00:03:40,500 Every relationship starts off with at least one lie. 56 00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:43,442 - You're tellin' me? - You know what I mean. 57 00:03:43,542 --> 00:03:47,019 For every 'Puppy Love', there's a hundred 'Heard it Through the Grapevine' 58 00:03:47,119 --> 00:03:50,233 or 'Yesterday' or... 'The Sign'. 59 00:03:50,333 --> 00:03:52,647 Ace of Base. 60 00:03:53,675 --> 00:03:57,033 Read the lyrics, man. It's deeper than you think. 61 00:03:57,133 --> 00:03:58,975 Why can't people be honest right from the start? 62 00:03:59,075 --> 00:04:02,033 If you have to lie to keep the relationship goin', then what is the point, okay? 63 00:04:02,133 --> 00:04:05,100 - Save yourself the tears. - You've had a rough time of it lately. 64 00:04:05,200 --> 00:04:10,267 - It's time to... get back in the saddle. - Paul, you're his old man. Say something. 65 00:04:11,667 --> 00:04:15,383 - Alan will know when the time is right. - Thank you. 66 00:04:15,483 --> 00:04:17,733 Maybe stop tellin' 'em you live with your dad. 67 00:04:18,133 --> 00:04:20,473 What am I gonna do? Put a table cloth over ya? 68 00:04:20,573 --> 00:04:22,942 Most women expect a few white lies at the start. 69 00:04:24,242 --> 00:04:26,717 - Here we go. - Here's the bottom line: 70 00:04:27,117 --> 00:04:30,968 no girl wants a basket of your dirty underwear on the first date date 71 00:04:31,068 --> 00:04:35,296 and if they do, it's only because their knickers are even scuzzier than yours 72 00:04:35,396 --> 00:04:39,342 and you do not want to go down that spiral, my friend. 73 00:04:44,499 --> 00:04:47,322 The night is young, you know? Let's see what happens. 74 00:04:48,566 --> 00:04:50,418 Good luck. 75 00:05:59,125 --> 00:06:01,942 - So, how's the day looking? - Busy enough. 76 00:06:02,042 --> 00:06:05,333 They rang in with one free room. A couple of others around, but not many. 77 00:06:05,433 --> 00:06:08,158 Brilliant. Remind me again what our job is? 78 00:06:08,858 --> 00:06:09,892 We love Dublin. 79 00:06:13,217 --> 00:06:14,742 Thanks, mum. 80 00:06:26,187 --> 00:06:29,058 - Morning, Beatrice. - Morning, darling. 81 00:06:29,158 --> 00:06:33,373 - Doesn't he work in the pharmacy? - He gives me discount on nicotine patches. 82 00:06:35,565 --> 00:06:37,442 Next. 83 00:06:39,668 --> 00:06:41,975 - City centre? - No! 84 00:06:42,572 --> 00:06:44,075 - Grafton Street? - No! 85 00:06:44,175 --> 00:06:49,092 It just kept raining 24 hours a day! How do you do anything here? 86 00:06:49,392 --> 00:06:53,158 And the price of your sandwiches! Where do I begin? 87 00:06:53,858 --> 00:06:55,693 I'm sure I went to school with you. 88 00:06:55,793 --> 00:06:58,075 - Your name's Alan, right? - Yeah. 89 00:06:58,175 --> 00:07:00,572 So, for kids? 90 00:07:00,672 --> 00:07:02,503 Next. 91 00:07:02,603 --> 00:07:05,525 How about I just write down Bono's address? 92 00:07:07,112 --> 00:07:08,592 - Croke Park? - No. 93 00:07:10,758 --> 00:07:12,833 - Departures. - Yes! 94 00:07:13,133 --> 00:07:15,079 - Upstairs. - Gracias! 95 00:07:18,883 --> 00:07:22,733 Meant to say, I think there's something over there for ya. Just arrived. 96 00:07:31,333 --> 00:07:32,525 Just a bit of fun. 97 00:07:32,725 --> 00:07:35,243 Yeah, yeah, it's... 98 00:07:35,343 --> 00:07:37,309 You had me fooled there for a second. 99 00:07:52,192 --> 00:07:53,368 So? 100 00:07:53,468 --> 00:07:55,536 I go for dinner with this guy the other night. 101 00:07:55,937 --> 00:07:57,753 - The pharmacy guy? - Oh, please! 102 00:07:57,853 --> 00:08:01,262 No, this guy, he shows me a picture of his car on his phone. 103 00:08:01,862 --> 00:08:07,203 It's a 1.9 litre Mazda. It's a 1.9 litre Mazda! 104 00:08:07,303 --> 00:08:10,529 What is wrong with men here? 105 00:08:14,003 --> 00:08:15,312 Mam. 106 00:08:16,237 --> 00:08:17,722 You Irish are fucked up. 107 00:08:20,762 --> 00:08:22,014 Jesus Christ. 108 00:08:34,695 --> 00:08:36,307 I need an ATM machine. 109 00:08:36,407 --> 00:08:38,562 Sure, yeah, it's just across the hall there. 110 00:08:38,662 --> 00:08:42,970 I need a room. Any kind of room. I don't mind. 111 00:08:43,970 --> 00:08:46,137 - I can't see it. - It's right there. 112 00:08:46,237 --> 00:08:50,857 Where? I can only see a shop over there. Are you saying it's in the shop? 113 00:08:50,957 --> 00:08:53,536 Should I ask them where it is? 114 00:08:54,202 --> 00:08:55,962 Next. 115 00:08:57,318 --> 00:08:59,626 Am I talking to myself? 116 00:09:01,369 --> 00:09:03,295 Where is it? Where? 117 00:09:03,995 --> 00:09:06,570 There. Right there. 118 00:09:11,046 --> 00:09:13,912 I think my colleague might be able to help you. 119 00:09:14,012 --> 00:09:15,893 Okay. 120 00:09:18,395 --> 00:09:19,912 Hey! 121 00:09:20,212 --> 00:09:21,762 Hey! 122 00:09:23,037 --> 00:09:25,828 So you didn't totally disappear off the planet, then? 123 00:09:26,745 --> 00:09:30,982 - Still here. - You always said Ireland was small. 124 00:09:31,637 --> 00:09:33,395 Yeah, I did warn ya. 125 00:09:34,895 --> 00:09:39,150 - We should probably hug or something. - Yeah, don't mind. 126 00:09:39,250 --> 00:09:41,141 Okay. 127 00:09:41,595 --> 00:09:44,538 - Are we hugging? - Sorry. I thought you didn't want to. 128 00:09:44,638 --> 00:09:48,637 - Definitely. Or whatever. - Okay. 129 00:09:58,195 --> 00:10:02,045 You're more hands on than the Paris tourist office, I'll give you that. 130 00:10:02,145 --> 00:10:05,435 I've just got to run down to the bank before lunch. 131 00:10:05,535 --> 00:10:07,881 There was a message for ya. 132 00:10:08,562 --> 00:10:10,034 Thanks. 133 00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:15,303 So... Paris? Did you say Paris? 134 00:10:15,403 --> 00:10:17,812 - Job interview there. - Cool. 135 00:10:17,912 --> 00:10:19,753 If I get it. 136 00:10:19,853 --> 00:10:22,237 And you work here? 137 00:10:22,337 --> 00:10:26,163 - Yeah, it's grand, you know. - Where's the toilets? 138 00:10:27,637 --> 00:10:30,796 They're right over there. Just down there. 139 00:10:34,028 --> 00:10:36,740 That's great. You're doing well. 140 00:10:37,228 --> 00:10:38,753 What are you doing here? 141 00:10:38,853 --> 00:10:43,828 We had an electrical problem en route. So the plane had to land here. 142 00:10:43,928 --> 00:10:47,695 I'm on standby for a flight tonight or tomorrow, but I need a room. 143 00:10:47,795 --> 00:10:51,162 - Do you guys do that here? - Just say the word. 144 00:10:54,062 --> 00:10:56,514 Christ! Sorry! 145 00:10:59,188 --> 00:11:02,953 Flynn's Hotel. They have a room. 146 00:11:08,228 --> 00:11:10,545 It's here. 147 00:11:20,727 --> 00:11:22,322 Don't... It's... I can... 148 00:11:22,422 --> 00:11:24,541 Nah. Nah. 149 00:11:29,670 --> 00:11:31,107 Thanks. 150 00:11:31,207 --> 00:11:33,120 Next. 151 00:11:33,869 --> 00:11:36,520 I should get out of your way. 152 00:11:38,037 --> 00:11:41,433 - Happy Valentine's Day. - You too. 153 00:11:48,620 --> 00:11:50,553 So you do what to this girl? 154 00:11:50,653 --> 00:11:55,007 We worked together about eight years ago. I was on a student visa in the States. 155 00:11:55,107 --> 00:11:56,703 You love her? 156 00:11:57,403 --> 00:12:01,873 There was talk of me staying, maybe getting hitched. 157 00:12:03,887 --> 00:12:04,862 Married. 158 00:12:04,962 --> 00:12:07,078 Do you have to do this with every girl you met? 159 00:12:07,178 --> 00:12:10,262 It was for a Green Card to keep me working there. 160 00:12:10,362 --> 00:12:13,970 - You were going to pay to marry her? - Why the hell would I do that? 161 00:12:14,070 --> 00:12:16,603 Jesus Christ! Your English is shit! Be fucking clearer? 162 00:12:16,703 --> 00:12:19,987 We wanted to keep things going between us, you know. See if we had something. 163 00:12:20,087 --> 00:12:23,078 - The Green Card was her idea. - And you fucked it up? 164 00:12:23,478 --> 00:12:24,820 Why do you think it was me that fucked it up? 165 00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:27,807 It's 50/50. More than likely, it's you, no? 166 00:12:27,907 --> 00:12:34,138 We were both twenty. Okay? Very twenty. 167 00:12:34,820 --> 00:12:37,053 - What does it matter now anyway? - Maybe this is a second chance. 168 00:12:37,153 --> 00:12:39,503 It could be fate. 169 00:12:40,070 --> 00:12:44,012 - You always say you don't believe in fate. - Yes, because I have thought about it a lot. 170 00:12:44,112 --> 00:12:46,820 You? You could definitely believe in this bullshit. 171 00:12:47,620 --> 00:12:50,462 Look, it's not like I haven't been able to stop thinking about her all these years. 172 00:12:50,562 --> 00:12:54,995 I have. I just haven't been able to forget her either. 173 00:12:55,095 --> 00:12:58,420 And she is somewhere out there right now. 174 00:12:59,820 --> 00:13:02,796 I didn't exactly leave things on the best of terms back in the day. 175 00:13:02,896 --> 00:13:05,540 You should've brought her to your place. Who know what happens? 176 00:13:05,740 --> 00:13:07,503 She's probably got a boyfriend anyway. 177 00:13:07,803 --> 00:13:10,998 - You're so stuck in your pants! - I'm not stuck in my pants. 178 00:13:11,098 --> 00:13:15,767 Every day you're closer to dying alone with nothing but a blanket of shit around you. 179 00:13:15,867 --> 00:13:17,603 - A blanket of... - A blanket of shit, Alan! 180 00:13:17,703 --> 00:13:21,720 That's great. Lovely thing to say to me. 181 00:13:53,503 --> 00:13:55,662 - How's the head? - Grand. 182 00:13:57,053 --> 00:13:59,537 Hola, Beatrice. 183 00:13:59,937 --> 00:14:03,344 I was thinking about our gig last night. Maybe we need a new band photo. 184 00:14:04,037 --> 00:14:05,562 What's wrong with the one we have? 185 00:14:05,962 --> 00:14:09,512 Well, I just think we've moved on from our hillbilly goth phase. 186 00:14:09,612 --> 00:14:12,929 True. Talking of changes... 187 00:14:13,029 --> 00:14:15,145 maybe it's time we started playing weddings. 188 00:14:16,845 --> 00:14:19,782 You want our band to play Sting, is that what you want? Fields of fuckin' Gold! 189 00:14:19,882 --> 00:14:22,028 Come on, man, it's been over a year now. 190 00:14:22,128 --> 00:14:25,853 It's not about that. If we go down that road, there's no more real gigs left. 191 00:14:25,953 --> 00:14:27,712 And you know that, right? Is that what you want? 192 00:14:27,812 --> 00:14:30,262 We could all do with a bit of extra dough. 193 00:14:30,362 --> 00:14:32,862 I've been trying to finish the jacks in me gaff for the last 12 months. 194 00:14:32,962 --> 00:14:34,116 I don't mind, 195 00:14:34,216 --> 00:14:37,137 but Deirdre's getting tired of the neighbours watching her do her business. 196 00:14:37,237 --> 00:14:41,203 My sister's got us an easy gig. It's a grand each. 197 00:14:41,303 --> 00:14:44,320 - I'm not playing weddings. - I can't hear a word you're saying, man! 198 00:14:44,420 --> 00:14:47,507 - Look, you think about it, yeah? - I'm not... 199 00:14:47,607 --> 00:14:49,902 I'm not playing... 200 00:15:24,678 --> 00:15:26,950 Thanks very much. Bye. 201 00:15:30,503 --> 00:15:32,762 - Hey! - Hi! 202 00:15:33,462 --> 00:15:35,614 What are you doin' here? 203 00:15:37,278 --> 00:15:41,619 Well, I just couldn't get that Post-it out of my mind. 204 00:15:43,403 --> 00:15:46,553 Plus it looks like I might get out of here tonight which would be amazing. 205 00:15:46,653 --> 00:15:49,820 Cool. Well, that's a shame. 206 00:15:50,120 --> 00:15:53,487 I could've shown you around town a bit if you were staying longer. 207 00:15:53,587 --> 00:15:55,595 - Guess it wasn't meant to be. - Yeah. 208 00:15:56,095 --> 00:16:02,289 I mean, I don't suppose... if you want... maybe stay? 209 00:16:04,520 --> 00:16:06,990 What's an evening? Get a flight tomorrow. 210 00:16:07,090 --> 00:16:10,311 Well, that's a little presumptuous. I mean... 211 00:16:10,411 --> 00:16:12,837 how do you know I don't have responsibilities? 212 00:16:13,237 --> 00:16:14,312 Oh, do you? 213 00:16:15,412 --> 00:16:16,695 Nothing comes to mind. 214 00:16:16,795 --> 00:16:19,662 I think I owe you a night out. No funny business, I promise. 215 00:16:19,762 --> 00:16:22,570 - Then I'm definitely going home. - Hi, can I help you? 216 00:16:22,870 --> 00:16:25,025 Hi. I'm on standby for a flight to New York. 217 00:16:25,125 --> 00:16:26,866 I was told I might be able to get out tonight. 218 00:16:26,966 --> 00:16:29,226 Okay, I'll check for you now. 219 00:16:29,696 --> 00:16:32,869 No, sorry, best we can do is tomorrow morning. 220 00:16:37,820 --> 00:16:41,078 If you had a summer romance with someone eight years ago 221 00:16:41,178 --> 00:16:44,968 and they wanted you to stay an extra night to catch up, 222 00:16:45,278 --> 00:16:47,354 would you do it? 223 00:16:47,720 --> 00:16:50,214 - And no funny business? - No. 224 00:16:50,520 --> 00:16:51,624 Like nothing? 225 00:16:52,970 --> 00:16:54,221 Well, I can. 226 00:16:55,137 --> 00:16:58,052 - Can he? - A while ago, maybe. 227 00:16:59,737 --> 00:17:03,803 - Yeah. Life's short. Why not? - Thanks. 228 00:17:03,903 --> 00:17:06,853 Sure there's no other flights? I'm kidding. 229 00:17:07,453 --> 00:17:12,022 Or if you slip me 10 euro, I can get you on a first class seat tonight. 230 00:17:12,745 --> 00:17:15,459 - What? - I'm kidding also. 231 00:17:19,470 --> 00:17:21,720 Alright. 232 00:17:22,362 --> 00:17:23,288 Bye. 233 00:17:26,737 --> 00:17:31,262 Just so you know, I live with my dad. I know it's not a big deal, but... 234 00:17:31,362 --> 00:17:33,745 Who doesn't live with their folks these days? 235 00:17:33,845 --> 00:17:38,188 - You do? - No! No! 236 00:17:40,112 --> 00:17:43,237 I didn't... I didn't mean... That sounded like I... 237 00:17:43,337 --> 00:17:45,220 - Fine. It's fine. - I just... 238 00:17:45,320 --> 00:17:48,083 A lot of my friends ended up in houses they couldn't pay for and... 239 00:17:48,183 --> 00:17:50,770 - had to move back home. - Right. 240 00:17:50,870 --> 00:17:53,512 It's just... It's super common, that's what I'm saying. 241 00:17:53,612 --> 00:17:56,884 You're right. It's all around, you know. 242 00:18:00,420 --> 00:18:04,086 Well, this... definitely... 243 00:18:04,186 --> 00:18:06,491 a temporary thing. 244 00:18:07,903 --> 00:18:09,370 The... 245 00:18:09,470 --> 00:18:12,728 - Living with my dad. - Oh, right! 246 00:18:19,870 --> 00:18:22,062 - Call it. - You just say, 'Call'. 247 00:18:22,162 --> 00:18:24,237 - Then call me. - You want me to ring ya? 248 00:18:25,137 --> 00:18:27,520 You know what I mean! 249 00:18:28,562 --> 00:18:29,787 Here's the man with the plan. 250 00:18:29,887 --> 00:18:31,595 - Alright, Alan? - Howya, lads. 251 00:18:32,095 --> 00:18:34,418 That's not all he's got. 252 00:18:34,518 --> 00:18:37,382 - This is Alice. - Hey, guys! 253 00:18:39,453 --> 00:18:40,887 It's alright. She's American. 254 00:18:41,589 --> 00:18:42,891 Okay. 255 00:18:43,695 --> 00:18:46,503 Okay, well, I'll just show you to your quarters. 256 00:18:46,803 --> 00:18:48,695 There's beers in the fridge if you want them. 257 00:18:48,795 --> 00:18:52,038 - Okay, great. - Won't be there for long though! 258 00:18:54,012 --> 00:18:55,728 Fiver says he blows it. 259 00:18:58,562 --> 00:19:02,912 - Some kind of poker night out there? - Divorced men's support group. 260 00:19:03,870 --> 00:19:05,608 They mainly play poker. 261 00:19:11,070 --> 00:19:14,392 - I'll sleep on the couch. - Okay. 262 00:19:15,828 --> 00:19:18,072 Great. 263 00:19:20,703 --> 00:19:24,125 No way! You still play barefoot? 264 00:19:24,395 --> 00:19:26,412 I never play barefoot. 265 00:19:26,912 --> 00:19:31,439 I remember your whole sensitive musician schtick you had going on. 266 00:19:34,070 --> 00:19:37,912 I bet there's not a single Depeche Mode track among all these records. 267 00:19:38,012 --> 00:19:41,777 If you're gonna love a band, it has to be based around more than one or two singles. 268 00:19:41,877 --> 00:19:44,006 One or two? 269 00:19:48,970 --> 00:19:53,055 - So it's been... - Eight years. 270 00:19:54,345 --> 00:19:56,298 Our twenties. 271 00:19:56,398 --> 00:19:59,282 Yeah. How was it for you? 272 00:20:00,695 --> 00:20:03,012 I was on high terror alert for most of it. 273 00:20:03,112 --> 00:20:06,731 Mainly because some of my friends decided they had to have babies, like, right know, 274 00:20:06,831 --> 00:20:09,210 - which freaked me out. - Right. 275 00:20:11,612 --> 00:20:13,831 What about you? 276 00:20:14,362 --> 00:20:18,645 No babies, but it's definitely had its moments. 277 00:20:21,012 --> 00:20:23,678 Oh, is there somewhere I could charge this? I just... 278 00:20:23,778 --> 00:20:26,837 I'm supposed to hear about the job. I don't want to miss the call. 279 00:20:26,937 --> 00:20:29,179 Yeah, sure. 280 00:20:31,920 --> 00:20:35,295 That's the main character. His name is Victor. 281 00:20:35,395 --> 00:20:38,197 The writer's this French guy, and they want somebody to illustrate the books. 282 00:20:38,297 --> 00:20:42,337 I'm one of the last two up for the gig. Could be a big break, finally. 283 00:20:42,437 --> 00:20:44,120 So, what's the story with Victor? 284 00:20:44,220 --> 00:20:47,525 He's one of these kids that reads everything. 285 00:20:47,625 --> 00:20:51,402 So this mysterious mobile library comes to his town 286 00:20:51,502 --> 00:20:55,120 and they tell him there's one book left that he hasn't read, 287 00:20:55,220 --> 00:20:57,353 but that he's not allowed. 288 00:20:57,453 --> 00:21:02,647 So he steals the book and it turns out that it's a biography of his own life 289 00:21:02,747 --> 00:21:08,020 from the future where he's basically the most hated man in the world. 290 00:21:08,120 --> 00:21:10,195 That's a bit rough. 291 00:21:10,295 --> 00:21:14,420 And so he's got to try and avoid this destiny and shape a new one, but... 292 00:21:14,926 --> 00:21:17,772 it turns out it's easier said than done. 293 00:21:18,962 --> 00:21:21,737 That's him fighting the forces of fate. 294 00:21:21,837 --> 00:21:24,195 There's also a seagull named Charles, who helps him out. 295 00:21:24,295 --> 00:21:27,879 It's basically Harry Potter but with wine bars. 296 00:21:28,279 --> 00:21:29,970 So what happens in the end? 297 00:21:30,874 --> 00:21:33,224 Not for another ten books. 298 00:21:34,178 --> 00:21:38,092 This is just showing what else I can do. 299 00:21:39,420 --> 00:21:42,001 Life drawings. 300 00:21:43,020 --> 00:21:44,425 This is my apartment. 301 00:21:45,953 --> 00:21:48,095 He just happened to be there? 302 00:21:48,780 --> 00:21:50,970 That's Brian. We're seeing each other. 303 00:21:51,070 --> 00:21:54,243 - He's a lawyer. - Clearly. 304 00:21:54,953 --> 00:21:56,828 He's actually quite shy. 305 00:21:56,928 --> 00:21:59,920 Oh, right. Not the talkative, naked lawyer type? 306 00:22:02,420 --> 00:22:04,612 Well, you seem to have it all figured out, Alice. 307 00:22:11,237 --> 00:22:12,594 You have a girlfriend? 308 00:22:16,643 --> 00:22:18,583 Yeah. 309 00:22:19,287 --> 00:22:21,845 Good for you. What's she like? 310 00:22:21,945 --> 00:22:25,088 Good, grand. 311 00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:29,662 I could draw you some detailed matchstick figures of her if you like. 312 00:22:29,762 --> 00:22:32,305 That's alright. Wait a second. 313 00:22:32,405 --> 00:22:37,137 You guys don't have some romantic evening planned? I don't want to crash anything. 314 00:22:37,453 --> 00:22:39,820 No, we don't really celebrate Valentine's Day. 315 00:22:40,820 --> 00:22:42,826 But you give each other cards? 316 00:22:43,023 --> 00:22:47,035 Yeah. That's just a bit of fun. 317 00:22:47,678 --> 00:22:50,362 - Maybe this was a bad idea. - No. 318 00:22:50,462 --> 00:22:54,853 No, no, no, no, it's cool. I will give her a call to see if she's around. 319 00:22:54,953 --> 00:22:57,545 And... you know, we can hook up. 320 00:22:57,645 --> 00:23:00,572 - You're sure? - Absolutely, yeah. 321 00:23:01,445 --> 00:23:05,212 Okay. I'll just... I guess I'll just change. 322 00:23:05,312 --> 00:23:07,593 Okay, grand. 323 00:23:08,745 --> 00:23:10,937 Hey, Alan. 324 00:23:12,525 --> 00:23:14,378 It's really good to see you again. 325 00:23:15,378 --> 00:23:17,581 Yeah, you too. 326 00:23:21,870 --> 00:23:24,209 I panicked. Alright? 327 00:23:25,312 --> 00:23:28,295 No, no, no, this is what happens when I put myself in this kind of situation. 328 00:23:29,095 --> 00:23:31,335 I need your help. 329 00:23:32,912 --> 00:23:37,750 Forty Euros, a meal and a taxi fare home. 330 00:23:37,870 --> 00:23:41,507 And all the cigarettes that you can smoke. 331 00:23:43,204 --> 00:23:45,595 Thanks. Thank you. 332 00:23:50,478 --> 00:23:53,218 - Here, moneybags! - What do you want? 333 00:23:53,678 --> 00:23:56,075 Change in fifties. 334 00:23:56,175 --> 00:23:58,887 Here, grab us one of mine, will ya? 335 00:23:58,987 --> 00:24:01,251 Yep. 336 00:24:01,778 --> 00:24:03,007 Who's the bird? 337 00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:06,828 They can't keep their hands off me, you know. 338 00:24:06,928 --> 00:24:08,612 - Since when? - Since forever. 339 00:24:09,412 --> 00:24:10,953 Who is she? 340 00:24:11,053 --> 00:24:13,878 We worked together a few summers ago in Martha's Vineyard. 341 00:24:13,978 --> 00:24:15,951 She's only here for a couple of hours. Her flight's in the morning. 342 00:24:16,051 --> 00:24:18,130 All part of the service now, is it? 343 00:24:22,320 --> 00:24:25,757 - Beers in the fridge. - Oh, thanks, cool. 344 00:24:31,695 --> 00:24:33,663 Would you fuckin' stop! 345 00:24:35,462 --> 00:24:37,320 Alright? 346 00:24:38,737 --> 00:24:41,062 So Alan tells me you guys get together and stuff? 347 00:24:41,462 --> 00:24:43,912 All you have to do is get married and divorced to join us, Alice. 348 00:24:44,212 --> 00:24:45,553 Is that all? 349 00:24:45,653 --> 00:24:47,587 I'm gonna change out of these things. I'll just be a sec. 350 00:24:47,687 --> 00:24:50,603 Okay. Got room for another? 351 00:24:50,703 --> 00:24:54,945 - Sure. But we only play for real money. - That's a shame. I only have Euros. 352 00:24:58,037 --> 00:25:00,628 A euro and you're in. 353 00:25:03,153 --> 00:25:05,086 Do you guys ever think about getting remarried? 354 00:25:05,402 --> 00:25:06,394 No! 355 00:25:07,370 --> 00:25:09,250 We've had enough of lies, Alice. 356 00:25:10,153 --> 00:25:15,078 I'm sure men lie just as much as women do. That's my opinion. 357 00:25:15,178 --> 00:25:16,603 Check. 358 00:25:16,703 --> 00:25:18,420 Check. 359 00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:20,409 Raise. 360 00:25:22,184 --> 00:25:24,887 - I'm out. - I'm gonna stay for five. 361 00:25:26,682 --> 00:25:27,978 I'll go along. 362 00:25:28,278 --> 00:25:32,162 In my experience, Alice, men lie because they have to. 363 00:25:32,262 --> 00:25:33,837 Women lie because they can. 364 00:25:33,937 --> 00:25:36,753 A guy once lied to me and told me his mother was dying 365 00:25:36,853 --> 00:25:39,062 just so he could put his hand up my sweater. I mean... 366 00:25:39,162 --> 00:25:42,445 that's pretty messed up, but I'm sure you guys can all beat that, right? 367 00:25:43,245 --> 00:25:45,595 My wife handpicked our wedding photographer. 368 00:25:45,695 --> 00:25:48,020 She said he was the best, and he was. 369 00:25:48,320 --> 00:25:49,920 Because when he sent me the wrong photographs, 370 00:25:50,020 --> 00:25:52,570 I could see that they were handpicking each other. 371 00:25:52,670 --> 00:25:55,595 - It's true. - Raise you five. 372 00:25:57,195 --> 00:25:59,220 I'm out. 373 00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:02,370 This girl I once knew, her boyfriend secretly filmed them having sex. 374 00:26:02,470 --> 00:26:06,796 And then, when they broke up, he accidentally but yet anonymously 375 00:26:06,896 --> 00:26:08,720 sent it to everybody that she works with. 376 00:26:08,820 --> 00:26:11,770 That being a sixth grade class that she teaches. 377 00:26:14,770 --> 00:26:16,845 All in. 378 00:26:19,537 --> 00:26:22,604 Well, I'll... call. 379 00:26:23,978 --> 00:26:28,762 With a full house of kings and aces. 380 00:26:36,703 --> 00:26:39,927 - A straight flush beats a house. - Unbelievable. 381 00:26:40,453 --> 00:26:44,320 Hey, don't feel bad. Whenever there's a winner, there's gotta be a loser. 382 00:26:44,420 --> 00:26:48,400 I found my wife in bed with a man dressed in a Wombles suit 383 00:26:48,500 --> 00:26:52,928 while another man in a Barney outfit stood above them taking a shit. 384 00:26:57,320 --> 00:26:59,653 Alright? Ready to go? 385 00:26:59,753 --> 00:27:02,353 I think so, yeah. 386 00:27:02,453 --> 00:27:05,195 It was really nice to meet all of you. 387 00:27:05,295 --> 00:27:08,362 - You too. - Yeah, good luck. 388 00:27:08,462 --> 00:27:11,237 - Did you play? - Yes. 389 00:27:11,337 --> 00:27:12,887 - Win? - I don't know. 390 00:27:12,987 --> 00:27:15,534 - Cheerio. - Bye now. 391 00:27:28,595 --> 00:27:31,278 So what did you think when you saw me at the airport? 392 00:27:32,178 --> 00:27:34,497 I thought, 'She's really let herself go.' 393 00:27:35,728 --> 00:27:37,020 Speak for yourself. 394 00:27:37,120 --> 00:27:39,630 No, I guess I thought... 395 00:27:40,399 --> 00:27:44,170 that it was a shame that we didn't keep in touch. 396 00:27:44,770 --> 00:27:47,154 Well, if you had stayed and accepted my proposal? 397 00:27:48,128 --> 00:27:49,694 That was... 398 00:27:49,794 --> 00:27:53,464 a mad idea. 399 00:27:54,612 --> 00:27:57,220 I was just trying to get you a Green Card. 400 00:27:57,320 --> 00:27:59,172 I know... 401 00:27:59,272 --> 00:28:01,495 but I still had another year in college. 402 00:28:01,595 --> 00:28:04,362 - The sensible decision. - Yeah. Hard to argue against it. 403 00:28:05,495 --> 00:28:08,028 And then you got that super awesome internship. 404 00:28:08,128 --> 00:28:10,084 Yeah. 405 00:28:10,678 --> 00:28:12,395 I always intended to come back. 406 00:28:14,762 --> 00:28:17,093 It's cool. It was just a summer thing. Right? 407 00:28:17,193 --> 00:28:19,126 Right. 408 00:28:19,828 --> 00:28:24,762 Far be it from me to pull you away from your simple thatch cottage 409 00:28:24,862 --> 00:28:26,995 - to the big city. - Yeah. 410 00:28:27,095 --> 00:28:29,006 You probably didn't even own shoes, did you? 411 00:28:29,106 --> 00:28:33,320 - Who can afford them? - Just a bunch of freckles and a dream. 412 00:28:33,420 --> 00:28:35,595 - And my fighting skills. - Yeah. 413 00:28:35,895 --> 00:28:38,877 How can you make a living without those? 414 00:28:41,003 --> 00:28:44,695 - It was... it was just an idea. - Yeah. 415 00:28:45,195 --> 00:28:47,220 Chalk it up to a wild youth. 416 00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:50,002 Think of that tattoo that you never ended up getting. 417 00:28:55,170 --> 00:28:57,295 - Here we go. - The job? 418 00:28:57,395 --> 00:28:59,553 Hi, Vicky. 419 00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:03,681 Oh, it's kind of hard to hear you. Hang on a second. 420 00:29:05,153 --> 00:29:09,266 Hey! Sorry. Yeah. Right. 421 00:29:12,237 --> 00:29:13,788 Okay. 422 00:29:24,012 --> 00:29:26,686 Not close enough? 423 00:29:27,553 --> 00:29:31,021 For someone who doesn't believe in lies, you're really sticking your toe in. 424 00:29:31,121 --> 00:29:33,462 I know. Just be cool. 425 00:29:33,762 --> 00:29:35,417 Okay. Like you? 426 00:29:35,817 --> 00:29:39,603 The opposite of me. If I was cool, I wouldn't be doing this. 427 00:29:39,703 --> 00:29:41,992 Where is she? 428 00:29:43,195 --> 00:29:45,154 She just got the job of her dreams. 429 00:29:46,053 --> 00:29:48,536 I love it when good things happen to beautiful people. 430 00:29:49,712 --> 00:29:54,227 Well, thanks for the opportunity. 431 00:29:54,745 --> 00:29:57,284 Okay, bye. 432 00:30:01,053 --> 00:30:04,795 - Maybe I should tell her the truth. - This will kick the ass. 433 00:30:04,895 --> 00:30:08,428 - So what if I don't have a girlfriend? - I'm here. We're fucking doing this! 434 00:30:08,528 --> 00:30:09,978 - This is a bad idea. - No. 435 00:30:10,078 --> 00:30:12,928 - Yeah. I'll just... - No. No! 436 00:30:13,028 --> 00:30:16,317 You're a dirty liar now just like the rest of us. Okay? 437 00:30:24,945 --> 00:30:27,939 I was thinking we should plan a nice trip. 438 00:30:28,978 --> 00:30:31,900 I was thinking we should go away. 439 00:30:42,053 --> 00:30:44,373 The wine's not very bad. 440 00:30:44,473 --> 00:30:46,929 Two bottles, please. 441 00:30:51,862 --> 00:30:54,757 So you guys work together? That's gotta be interesting. 442 00:30:55,970 --> 00:30:57,453 It has its moments. 443 00:30:57,553 --> 00:31:03,628 It is hard to control ourselves. The relationship is very physical. 444 00:31:03,728 --> 00:31:05,500 Yeah. 445 00:31:07,653 --> 00:31:10,528 - How long was it before you... - Became lovers? 446 00:31:10,728 --> 00:31:12,780 Sure. 447 00:31:13,653 --> 00:31:18,220 - It was, it was pretty soon, yeah. - It was at a David Bowie concert. 448 00:31:18,320 --> 00:31:20,853 Well, not David Bowie, but someone who look like him. 449 00:31:21,053 --> 00:31:25,226 What was their name? You know? The name of the band that was not him? 450 00:31:26,778 --> 00:31:29,796 - Diamond Dogs. - Yes, the Dogs. 451 00:31:29,896 --> 00:31:32,212 Well... We went just as friends. 452 00:31:32,312 --> 00:31:35,328 The David Bowie man, he sings 'Life on Mars' 453 00:31:35,828 --> 00:31:41,445 and the crowd, it surge forward, pressing our bodies together. 454 00:31:41,545 --> 00:31:48,137 And as David sing, we look into each others' eyes as one. 455 00:31:48,237 --> 00:31:51,061 And then we kissed. 456 00:31:52,112 --> 00:31:54,596 Brilliant. It was a brilliant night. 457 00:32:05,478 --> 00:32:07,895 - You're very good at this. - Just to make her jealous. 458 00:32:07,995 --> 00:32:10,712 Yeah, I got that when you compared me to a fully inflamed stallion. 459 00:32:10,812 --> 00:32:13,503 It's Valentine's. The least I can do is pretend we are fucking. 460 00:32:13,603 --> 00:32:16,382 By the time I am finished, she will be dying to be with you. 461 00:32:16,482 --> 00:32:18,872 Look, it's not gonna happen. She's got a boyfriend. 462 00:32:18,972 --> 00:32:21,503 The guy who Wendy left you for. He must have done this, no? 463 00:32:21,603 --> 00:32:23,932 - Exactly. - But it seemed to work for him. 464 00:32:26,278 --> 00:32:29,012 I'm not gonna be like the guy who ran off with my fiancée. 465 00:32:30,112 --> 00:32:32,299 Maybe if you were, you would not be here. 466 00:32:33,012 --> 00:32:36,575 - Who knows? - This is obvious, Alan. 467 00:32:41,512 --> 00:32:45,397 Weren't you doing finance? I thought you were going to be the next Gekko the Great. 468 00:32:45,497 --> 00:32:47,637 Just what the world needs. 469 00:32:47,737 --> 00:32:51,478 The bank is a pool of rats. He told them to shove it up their asses. 470 00:32:51,578 --> 00:32:54,345 No, no, no, music is Alan's passion. 471 00:32:54,445 --> 00:32:56,053 You quit your job? 472 00:32:56,153 --> 00:32:58,506 Yeah, yeah. I told them where to stick it. 473 00:32:59,612 --> 00:33:01,309 Aren't you full of surprises. 474 00:33:02,612 --> 00:33:05,053 - What is it you said? - What? 475 00:33:05,153 --> 00:33:07,687 You know, after you leave? 476 00:33:08,278 --> 00:33:10,828 - Remind me again. - That's it. 477 00:33:10,928 --> 00:33:16,474 He said to me, 'Beatrice, we must live in the moment. Not in fucking suits.' 478 00:33:17,803 --> 00:33:22,412 That's cool. You know, I... I had this consultant gig for a little while, 479 00:33:22,512 --> 00:33:26,094 and it was a pretty sweet deal, but it just didn't do it for me. You know? 480 00:33:26,194 --> 00:33:28,623 Yeah, right, totally. 481 00:33:29,612 --> 00:33:32,850 And that's it, just like that, never going back. 482 00:33:33,512 --> 00:33:35,680 I mean, why would you, right? 483 00:33:41,928 --> 00:33:46,172 If we had formed a band, what would we have played? 484 00:33:46,272 --> 00:33:50,253 - I don't know. Johnny Cash? - I love Hank Williams. 485 00:33:51,053 --> 00:33:52,095 Since when? 486 00:33:52,595 --> 00:33:55,253 Last couple of years. Why? You don't think he'd be on my playlist? 487 00:33:55,353 --> 00:33:56,643 No, I'm happy he is, 488 00:33:56,743 --> 00:34:00,520 but I'm pretty sure I played you some back in the day and you weren't that keen. 489 00:34:00,620 --> 00:34:02,778 I think I'd remember if you did. 490 00:34:03,478 --> 00:34:06,639 - Let's agree to disagree on that one. - Just that one? 491 00:34:07,762 --> 00:34:12,213 Alan, could I speak to you for just one second? 492 00:34:12,313 --> 00:34:15,823 It's alright. I was just about to go to the restroom. 493 00:34:17,295 --> 00:34:19,544 - What's the problem? - I've met someone. 494 00:34:20,570 --> 00:34:24,980 - You were in the bathroom for two minutes. - I was coming out, he was going in. 495 00:34:25,080 --> 00:34:27,295 Our eyes, they meet. Alan, I must leave with him now. 496 00:34:28,195 --> 00:34:30,008 In what universe do you think this is appropriate... 497 00:34:30,108 --> 00:34:32,709 - I cannot help it! - Billions of guys out there. 498 00:34:32,809 --> 00:34:36,462 Can't you just let one walk by with his pants still on? 499 00:34:36,562 --> 00:34:39,323 Alan, this might be love. 500 00:34:42,295 --> 00:34:43,670 You don't want to spend the rest of your life 501 00:34:43,770 --> 00:34:46,457 with someone you met outside a toilet, do you? 502 00:34:48,153 --> 00:34:49,912 Buena sera. 503 00:34:50,112 --> 00:34:53,289 Well... well... 504 00:34:56,833 --> 00:34:58,699 - Go on. - Have fun. 505 00:35:03,195 --> 00:35:05,036 Great. 506 00:35:09,537 --> 00:35:13,095 Hi. Beatrice had to help out a flatmate. 507 00:35:13,195 --> 00:35:15,453 They lost their key, and they called Beatrice. 508 00:35:15,553 --> 00:35:19,553 She's really sorry she didn't get to say goodbye. She's really, really sorry. 509 00:35:19,653 --> 00:35:21,703 Alan... 510 00:35:30,237 --> 00:35:32,660 I'm between girlfriends at the minute. 511 00:35:33,870 --> 00:35:35,389 So she... 512 00:35:36,200 --> 00:35:37,837 No. 513 00:35:37,937 --> 00:35:39,793 So... 514 00:35:41,537 --> 00:35:42,570 Why? 515 00:35:51,378 --> 00:35:54,767 Would you like to order some coffee or dessert? 516 00:35:55,028 --> 00:35:58,039 I think we'll just take the check. 517 00:36:07,970 --> 00:36:12,787 Look, okay, I didn't quit my job. I was fired. 518 00:36:12,887 --> 00:36:14,608 Any more lies you'd like to clear up? 519 00:36:16,028 --> 00:36:19,165 A couple of months before that, I was stood up at the altar. 520 00:36:20,278 --> 00:36:22,537 - You were going to be married? - Yeah. 521 00:36:22,637 --> 00:36:24,912 - You? - Yeah. 522 00:36:25,612 --> 00:36:30,239 - To a real person? - Yes, a real person. Wendy. 523 00:36:32,195 --> 00:36:34,012 Wendy. 524 00:36:34,112 --> 00:36:36,195 What? 525 00:36:36,295 --> 00:36:38,616 Nothing. I'm just surprised. 526 00:36:39,195 --> 00:36:42,153 - That I met someone else? - Sure. 527 00:36:42,253 --> 00:36:45,084 Well, Wendy turned out to be a lucky escape. 528 00:36:45,184 --> 00:36:47,370 I don't know what I was thinking. 529 00:36:47,470 --> 00:36:51,945 - Once bitten, though... - It still doesn't explain the fake girlfriend. 530 00:36:56,028 --> 00:36:58,978 Look, okay, I promised you... 531 00:36:59,078 --> 00:37:02,737 that if you ever came here, I'd give you a great night. 532 00:37:02,837 --> 00:37:07,029 I just wanna make good on that. If you'll let me. 533 00:37:07,762 --> 00:37:12,512 - 100% honesty. - Trust me, 100% is impossible. 534 00:37:12,612 --> 00:37:14,931 Well, as close to. 535 00:37:15,431 --> 00:37:19,956 You can ask me anything. Like first gig, first crush. 536 00:37:20,056 --> 00:37:23,112 - Last time I whacked off. - Sure. 537 00:37:23,212 --> 00:37:25,603 - What? - That last one. 538 00:37:26,803 --> 00:37:28,652 Fine. 539 00:37:31,512 --> 00:37:33,607 Last week. 540 00:37:35,220 --> 00:37:39,253 I was on my own in the apartment for once. 541 00:37:39,353 --> 00:37:43,453 There was a film on the telly. 542 00:37:43,553 --> 00:37:46,278 I had a couple of beers and one thing led to another. 543 00:37:46,378 --> 00:37:48,217 I'm not proud of it, but there you go. 544 00:37:48,317 --> 00:37:50,115 Who was it? 545 00:37:51,112 --> 00:37:52,535 Helen Mirren. 546 00:37:55,153 --> 00:37:57,530 In 'The Queen'. 547 00:37:58,353 --> 00:38:00,483 You're a fan of the Royal Family? 548 00:38:00,583 --> 00:38:05,094 In the drunken scenario I came up with... I was doing it for my country. 549 00:38:07,237 --> 00:38:10,809 - Is that enough truth for one night? - I think we're just getting started. 550 00:38:15,012 --> 00:38:19,653 So you've just completely taken yourself out of the game? 551 00:38:19,753 --> 00:38:23,428 You could say I'm keeping the bench warm or something like that. 552 00:38:23,528 --> 00:38:26,137 Maybe you should think about switching teams. 553 00:38:26,237 --> 00:38:30,714 - Probably wouldn't hurt. - Maybe initially, but you'd get used to it. 554 00:38:32,237 --> 00:38:36,377 I guess I just haven't met anyone who's ticked all the boxes. 555 00:38:37,378 --> 00:38:41,203 - I gave up ticking boxes a long time ago. - Really? 556 00:38:41,303 --> 00:38:44,595 You just need to accept that love is a lottery. 557 00:38:45,595 --> 00:38:49,100 Well, I don't like those odds. 558 00:38:50,253 --> 00:38:53,092 Well... tough shit. 559 00:39:02,012 --> 00:39:04,624 So is this all people do in Dublin? 560 00:39:05,820 --> 00:39:08,553 There's not that much to do in the evenings. 561 00:39:08,653 --> 00:39:10,626 Maybe in the summertime... 562 00:39:11,226 --> 00:39:12,746 There must be something. 563 00:39:14,195 --> 00:39:16,947 Play a few games of pool. 564 00:39:18,153 --> 00:39:21,670 - Get a kebab? - I thought you were a tourist advisor. 565 00:39:22,070 --> 00:39:25,999 We usually advise them to go somewhere else. 566 00:39:26,903 --> 00:39:28,937 Okay. 567 00:39:29,237 --> 00:39:31,251 Let me think. 568 00:39:38,012 --> 00:39:41,031 Do what you did yesterday 569 00:39:41,331 --> 00:39:44,078 Go on repeating 570 00:39:44,178 --> 00:39:47,577 'Cause my heart's only on fire 571 00:39:47,677 --> 00:39:50,364 When you are the teacher 572 00:39:50,987 --> 00:39:53,694 You take the torch and I 573 00:39:54,194 --> 00:39:57,060 Follow the leader. 574 00:39:58,987 --> 00:40:02,016 You'd be my master 575 00:40:02,116 --> 00:40:04,440 And I'll be your fever 576 00:40:10,212 --> 00:40:15,904 You told me your past was taken by thieves 577 00:40:16,304 --> 00:40:18,613 Since then you've been running 578 00:40:19,752 --> 00:40:21,973 In search of reliefs 579 00:40:22,570 --> 00:40:26,320 You don't know when it's coming 580 00:40:26,420 --> 00:40:29,333 I don't know either 581 00:40:42,803 --> 00:40:44,228 Nice. 582 00:40:45,312 --> 00:40:48,778 Dad worked here for a while. We'd have lunch up here sometimes. 583 00:40:48,878 --> 00:40:51,970 If you don't mind me saying so, he seems to have some... 584 00:40:52,070 --> 00:40:54,828 interesting views on women. 585 00:40:54,928 --> 00:40:58,220 Well, sometimes they don't turn out the way you hoped, you know? 586 00:41:00,045 --> 00:41:01,518 Women or parents? 587 00:41:02,312 --> 00:41:05,703 Just parents. They're not meant to be unpredictable. 588 00:41:05,803 --> 00:41:07,151 Okay. 589 00:41:13,253 --> 00:41:15,403 Your folks will be delighted about the news. 590 00:41:18,237 --> 00:41:20,820 Well, unfortunately... 591 00:41:34,970 --> 00:41:37,449 High security. 592 00:41:46,462 --> 00:41:48,625 - Oh, crap! - What? 593 00:41:54,612 --> 00:41:56,617 I'm sure someone will be up in a minute. 594 00:41:58,537 --> 00:42:00,870 Hello? Is there anyone there? 595 00:42:00,970 --> 00:42:04,912 Try calling the desk again. We're on the roof of a hotel. 596 00:42:05,012 --> 00:42:07,545 Well, you know, someone has to hear us. 597 00:42:10,920 --> 00:42:14,175 Can't believe I'm gonna get double pneumonia for this! 598 00:42:14,275 --> 00:42:16,765 You said the view was nice. 599 00:42:16,865 --> 00:42:21,528 I was being polite. I've already seen two... three people throwing up down there! 600 00:42:22,028 --> 00:42:23,912 Okay. 601 00:42:24,012 --> 00:42:26,353 I can really see why you wanted to stay here. 602 00:42:27,153 --> 00:42:32,835 Yeah, yeah. I was really hoping to live it up here on the roof. 603 00:42:42,028 --> 00:42:45,762 If I still need to say sorry about the whole Green Card thing... 604 00:42:45,862 --> 00:42:48,437 I think you're overestimating your impact. 605 00:42:48,537 --> 00:42:50,828 Alright. 606 00:42:51,337 --> 00:42:53,594 There was nothing stopping you from coming here. 607 00:42:55,937 --> 00:42:57,616 You knew how I felt about you. 608 00:42:59,887 --> 00:43:01,620 - Jesus! - All right, that's it! 609 00:43:01,720 --> 00:43:03,583 I'm done freezing my ass off out here. 610 00:43:05,770 --> 00:43:07,862 - Get out of the way. - What are you doin'? 611 00:43:07,962 --> 00:43:10,512 - Get out of the way, Alan. - Not before... 612 00:43:16,253 --> 00:43:20,539 I knew exactly how you felt about me. And that's what pissed me off the most. 613 00:43:28,428 --> 00:43:29,839 You should see our summers. 614 00:43:40,470 --> 00:43:42,525 Help! 615 00:43:45,112 --> 00:43:49,087 - Did you hear somebody? - My eardrums are full of water. 616 00:43:51,070 --> 00:43:54,223 Please! Someone! 617 00:44:00,948 --> 00:44:02,722 Hello? 618 00:44:05,637 --> 00:44:08,703 Help him, please! Something's gone down the wrong way! 619 00:44:08,803 --> 00:44:11,012 - He's choking. - Okay, don't worry, here we go. 620 00:44:11,112 --> 00:44:14,045 One, two, three! 621 00:44:15,970 --> 00:44:17,512 Thank you. 622 00:44:17,612 --> 00:44:21,378 - Thank God! - Oh, I was almost a goner! 623 00:44:21,478 --> 00:44:23,662 I'm sure you've got plenty of life still left in you! 624 00:44:23,762 --> 00:44:27,139 If there's anything we can do for you. I just don't know how we can thank you. 625 00:44:27,239 --> 00:44:30,803 - We're grand. - Oh, please. There must be something. 626 00:44:30,903 --> 00:44:33,520 You wouldn't have any dry clothes, would you? 627 00:44:37,170 --> 00:44:40,355 We just popped up to drop our things off, but... 628 00:44:40,455 --> 00:44:43,028 the moment got the better of us if you know what I mean. 629 00:44:43,128 --> 00:44:47,887 - Well, thanks for these. - Oh, no. Keep it. It's missing a button. 630 00:44:47,987 --> 00:44:51,884 - You'll have to join us. - We insist. 631 00:44:51,984 --> 00:44:55,195 - Okay, yeah. - Wonderful. 632 00:44:55,295 --> 00:44:57,945 - Could you just give us a moment? - Okay. 633 00:44:58,045 --> 00:45:00,297 Don't take too long. 634 00:45:01,795 --> 00:45:03,512 What are you doin'? 635 00:45:03,612 --> 00:45:05,537 I think they're super sweet and we should stay. 636 00:45:05,640 --> 00:45:07,270 I'm really not up for this kind of thing. 637 00:45:07,370 --> 00:45:11,137 Come on. What, are you never gonna go to another wedding for the rest of your life? 638 00:45:12,387 --> 00:45:14,595 Do you not think they're creepy? 639 00:45:14,695 --> 00:45:17,641 I thought this was my night. 640 00:45:19,028 --> 00:45:21,709 Well, I mean, is it or isn't it? 641 00:45:37,453 --> 00:45:40,437 This is so awesome. It's like something out of 'Cocoon'. 642 00:45:40,537 --> 00:45:43,212 Are you related to the bride or the groom? 643 00:45:43,312 --> 00:45:45,725 No. We just borrowed their clothes. 644 00:45:52,912 --> 00:45:56,295 We're going to end up on a spacecraft full of piss! 645 00:45:59,295 --> 00:46:02,887 I've known Barbara for sixty years. 646 00:46:02,987 --> 00:46:06,030 Yes, sixty years. 647 00:46:06,130 --> 00:46:11,470 We were friends at first. Then life took us in different directions. 648 00:46:11,570 --> 00:46:16,428 We met wonderful partners and had a wonderful married life with them. 649 00:46:16,528 --> 00:46:19,595 We assumed we'd had our turn at love. 650 00:46:19,695 --> 00:46:26,137 But then, all these years later... we found each other again. 651 00:46:26,237 --> 00:46:31,343 Oh, how lucky we are. How very lucky indeed. 652 00:46:31,837 --> 00:46:34,470 So I would ask you to raise your glasses 653 00:46:34,570 --> 00:46:38,437 and toast to my beautiful wife, Barbara. 654 00:46:38,537 --> 00:46:40,807 To Barbara! 655 00:46:48,920 --> 00:46:53,427 I know it's short notice, but I just wanna give her the best night I can. 656 00:46:53,695 --> 00:46:56,554 No, it has to be tonight. 657 00:46:57,537 --> 00:47:00,315 Just tell her you'll have sex tomorrow. 658 00:47:01,028 --> 00:47:03,112 If you do it, so will Cian. 659 00:47:03,212 --> 00:47:06,368 Look, there must be a place we can play. Anywhere. 660 00:47:06,468 --> 00:47:08,962 No, Dad's not working tonight. 661 00:47:09,695 --> 00:47:13,137 Okay, you guys wanna play weddings, right? 662 00:47:15,795 --> 00:47:19,971 Help me out here and I'll play wherever and whatever you want. 663 00:47:21,312 --> 00:47:23,445 Even 'Fields of Gold'. 664 00:47:24,212 --> 00:47:27,233 Brilliant. Brilliant. Brilliant, thanks, Jimi. 665 00:47:48,253 --> 00:47:50,335 You got a camera? 666 00:48:11,478 --> 00:48:13,453 Are you getting them? 667 00:48:13,553 --> 00:48:15,383 Yeah. 668 00:48:17,212 --> 00:48:19,715 It's a keeper, alright. 669 00:48:40,612 --> 00:48:42,920 So I never asked you how Paris was. 670 00:48:43,653 --> 00:48:48,720 It was incredibly romantic in a very depressing way. 671 00:48:48,820 --> 00:48:51,570 Well, at least Dublin is depressing for the right reasons. 672 00:48:52,070 --> 00:48:54,552 Brian was supposed to come with me, but he had to cancel at the last minute. 673 00:48:55,870 --> 00:48:59,387 - Work? - Yeah, he had this golf thing. 674 00:48:59,487 --> 00:49:01,895 He cancelled a trip to Paris with you for golf? 675 00:49:02,595 --> 00:49:06,623 Some big client was in town, and he was put in charge of showing him a good time. 676 00:49:07,153 --> 00:49:10,689 Can't really say no. It's how you make partner. 677 00:49:13,570 --> 00:49:15,845 So do yous live together? 678 00:49:15,945 --> 00:49:19,229 No. He lives with friends. 679 00:49:19,987 --> 00:49:21,818 College buddies. 680 00:49:22,720 --> 00:49:26,195 One year. My longest relationship. 681 00:49:26,295 --> 00:49:27,910 We mostly see each other on weekends. 682 00:49:29,295 --> 00:49:30,558 Right. 683 00:49:30,658 --> 00:49:34,519 So when you say you're going out a year, actually being in the same room... 684 00:49:34,619 --> 00:49:38,012 A year of weekends, I guess. 685 00:49:38,945 --> 00:49:43,112 Which adds up to? A hundred days. Maybe less. 686 00:49:43,262 --> 00:49:47,720 We had a whole summer together. So that's nearly four months. 687 00:49:47,820 --> 00:49:49,603 - Every day. - Working, living... 688 00:49:49,703 --> 00:49:51,019 We didn't live together. 689 00:49:51,570 --> 00:49:54,388 Oh, well. We might as well have. 690 00:49:57,028 --> 00:49:59,320 Are you still technically my longest relationship? 691 00:50:00,450 --> 00:50:02,321 Yeah. 692 00:50:02,421 --> 00:50:04,578 Damn it. 693 00:50:06,337 --> 00:50:08,095 One more for the road? 694 00:50:08,695 --> 00:50:10,940 This road is getting longer all the time. 695 00:50:31,512 --> 00:50:34,970 She has a boyfriend. We're just mates. 696 00:50:35,070 --> 00:50:39,237 Try and enjoy the night like some kind of drunk eunuch. 697 00:50:39,337 --> 00:50:41,145 Thanks. 698 00:50:51,378 --> 00:50:53,237 What are you doing? 699 00:50:53,337 --> 00:50:57,720 Oh, come on. I thought it would be a pity to leave here without a dance. 700 00:50:57,820 --> 00:50:59,879 Oh, come on. 701 00:51:44,153 --> 00:51:45,970 We shouldn't. 702 00:51:46,070 --> 00:51:48,839 Yeah, you're right. I didn't mean... 703 00:51:49,528 --> 00:51:52,132 Maybe we should just go. 704 00:51:52,295 --> 00:51:54,367 Yeah. 705 00:52:08,045 --> 00:52:11,237 - I'm sorry to you. I got a bit carried away. - Don't worry about it. It's fine. 706 00:52:11,737 --> 00:52:13,357 I mean, it's crazy, right? It would never work. 707 00:52:13,457 --> 00:52:16,262 - Right. - I'm over here, you're over there. 708 00:52:16,362 --> 00:52:19,870 And there's the small matter of me having a boyfriend. 709 00:52:19,970 --> 00:52:21,728 Of course. Yeah, right. 710 00:52:21,828 --> 00:52:24,687 But if you didn't have a boyfriend, would it really be that far out an idea? 711 00:52:24,787 --> 00:52:26,370 Because you're the one? 712 00:52:26,470 --> 00:52:29,928 I don't know. I'm trying to be 100% honest. I thought that's what we agreed. 713 00:52:30,028 --> 00:52:33,637 You want me to be honest? I really like you. 714 00:52:33,737 --> 00:52:37,587 And not in some meaningless roll in the hay kind of way. 715 00:52:39,737 --> 00:52:44,418 We had something one time, but we're different people now. 716 00:52:45,337 --> 00:52:48,995 I just thought we could have this one really cool night in Dublin, 717 00:52:49,095 --> 00:52:54,637 and we could get away from stuff and, you know, have fun. But I... 718 00:52:54,737 --> 00:52:56,897 Maybe that's not possible. 719 00:53:17,528 --> 00:53:20,117 Oh, for God's sake! 720 00:53:21,528 --> 00:53:23,053 What is it? 721 00:53:23,153 --> 00:53:25,775 Look, let's not leave it like this. 722 00:53:26,853 --> 00:53:30,545 At the very least, we were having an interesting night before I got stupid. 723 00:53:31,720 --> 00:53:33,868 One more drink? 724 00:53:37,028 --> 00:53:40,595 - Fine, if you'll get me a taxi. - I promise you won't be disappointed. 725 00:53:40,695 --> 00:53:43,028 - Okay. - I think. 726 00:53:43,128 --> 00:53:45,829 Oh, Danny Boy, the pipes 727 00:53:45,929 --> 00:53:49,893 The pipes are calling 728 00:53:50,658 --> 00:53:56,667 From glen to glen and down the mountainside. 729 00:54:04,295 --> 00:54:07,745 - Is this your regular hangout? - You're one place as good as the next. 730 00:54:07,845 --> 00:54:10,595 We passed, like, 50 bars on the way here. 731 00:54:10,695 --> 00:54:14,592 I think you're taking my advice about switching teams to heart. 732 00:54:16,153 --> 00:54:18,104 Listen, I'll be back in a sec. 733 00:54:24,987 --> 00:54:27,845 Man, if I'm not back in 30 minutes, my relationship is over. 734 00:54:27,945 --> 00:54:29,237 I owe you big time. 735 00:54:29,337 --> 00:54:32,663 Actually you owe Julie, that tasty morsel at the bar. 736 00:54:32,763 --> 00:54:34,678 She got us in at the last minute. 737 00:54:34,778 --> 00:54:37,201 - Did you get the bass? - They not here? 738 00:54:39,620 --> 00:54:41,140 - Been here long? - What? 739 00:54:41,240 --> 00:54:44,845 - Been here long? - Five minutes. 740 00:54:44,945 --> 00:54:48,440 - Did someone... - No, we brought our own glow sticks. 741 00:54:51,628 --> 00:54:54,276 Will you stay for a pint? 742 00:54:55,120 --> 00:54:57,358 My shout. 743 00:54:58,020 --> 00:54:59,945 Grand. 744 00:55:12,070 --> 00:55:16,287 Okay, and now for our final last minute competitors 745 00:55:16,387 --> 00:55:20,412 for the 'Talent Trophy'... bringing the fifties back to life 746 00:55:20,512 --> 00:55:25,961 without the use of Viagra, please welcome 'The Nightlinks'. 747 00:55:31,528 --> 00:55:36,720 Hi, everyone. This is a little song about love and all its temposity. 748 00:55:36,820 --> 00:55:39,696 Sing it with us if you know the words. I'm talking to you, Alice. 749 00:55:42,212 --> 00:55:46,820 I've tried so hard, my dear, to show that you're my every dream, 750 00:55:46,920 --> 00:55:51,530 Yet you're afraid each thing I do is just some evil scheme 751 00:55:51,630 --> 00:55:56,153 A memory from your lonesome past keeps us so far apart 752 00:55:56,253 --> 00:56:01,570 Why can't I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold, cold heart? 753 00:56:02,762 --> 00:56:05,070 - No. - Yes. 754 00:56:10,587 --> 00:56:14,812 Another love before my time made your heart sad and blue 755 00:56:15,112 --> 00:56:19,778 And so my heart is paying now for things I didn't do 756 00:56:19,878 --> 00:56:24,328 In anger, unkind words are said that make the teardrops start 757 00:56:24,528 --> 00:56:29,032 Why can't I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold, cold heart? 758 00:56:45,670 --> 00:56:47,442 I don't remember the lyrics. 759 00:56:49,153 --> 00:56:53,587 You'll never know how much it hurts to see you sit and cry 760 00:56:53,987 --> 00:56:58,448 You know you need and want my love, yet you're afraid to try 761 00:56:58,548 --> 00:57:03,195 Why do you run and hide from life To try it just ain't smart? 762 00:57:03,295 --> 00:57:07,628 Why can't I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold, cold heart? 763 00:57:08,128 --> 00:57:12,550 There was a time when I believed that you belonged to me, 764 00:57:12,650 --> 00:57:17,308 But now I know your heart is shackled to a memory 765 00:57:17,408 --> 00:57:21,770 The more I learn to care for you, the more we drift apart 766 00:57:22,170 --> 00:57:26,533 Why can't I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold, cold heart? 767 00:57:48,420 --> 00:57:51,622 - Well done, Alan! - Well done, Alan! 768 00:57:59,170 --> 00:58:01,845 There's always next week. 769 00:58:01,945 --> 00:58:03,828 I'm not even gonna say it. 770 00:58:03,928 --> 00:58:08,070 Look, we're your mates. We're gonna support any decision you make here. 771 00:58:08,170 --> 00:58:11,395 But if you don't dick this girl, you're lettin' us all down. 772 00:58:11,495 --> 00:58:12,854 - Lads... - For the record, 773 00:58:12,954 --> 00:58:16,328 I disagree with using 'dick' as a verb, but I think the sentiment is about right. 774 00:58:16,428 --> 00:58:21,803 It's not just me you're lettin' down. Not just me or your Da or Jimi. 775 00:58:21,903 --> 00:58:24,845 I don't mind. I can take the blows. 776 00:58:24,945 --> 00:58:29,036 Now is not the time to be a cuddly hobbit, 777 00:58:29,136 --> 00:58:35,285 singing weak ass songs about how ginger ale makes your tummy feel all funny. 778 00:58:35,385 --> 00:58:40,487 Now, my friend, is the time to sex panther the shit out of this. 779 00:58:40,887 --> 00:58:43,494 - What are you talking about? I've... - What? 780 00:58:43,594 --> 00:58:45,587 I'm not taking advice from you ever again. 781 00:58:45,687 --> 00:58:49,312 You always say the best way to get a girl is to walk away from them. 782 00:58:49,412 --> 00:58:53,445 - Yeah, make them come to you. - That's a classic move in fairness. 783 00:58:53,545 --> 00:58:56,012 Four years in college, they never followed. 784 00:58:56,112 --> 00:58:58,928 Jesus! I have fallen arches? 785 00:58:59,028 --> 00:59:02,009 Who's going to follow someone with corrective footwear? 786 00:59:02,109 --> 00:59:06,512 I mean, at least I had an excuse. What's yours? 787 00:59:06,612 --> 00:59:09,345 I made a move. It didn't happen. 788 00:59:09,445 --> 00:59:13,114 And she's got a boyfriend. End of story. 789 00:59:18,028 --> 00:59:21,295 It's a great show, guys. We'll take care of this stuff. 790 00:59:21,395 --> 00:59:23,437 - Thanks, Dad. - See you at home. 791 00:59:23,537 --> 00:59:24,687 Good luck. 792 00:59:24,787 --> 00:59:28,373 We were never here, right? Lovely pint, though. 793 00:59:30,753 --> 00:59:32,637 Are you sure we can't convince you to join the band? 794 00:59:32,737 --> 00:59:35,487 I'm just gonna have to be an honorary member. 795 00:59:35,587 --> 00:59:41,553 Well, this has been great, you know? Really has. You're... 796 00:59:44,987 --> 00:59:48,387 - Did I say something wrong? - That's just something he does. 797 00:59:48,487 --> 00:59:50,487 Right, I'm off. 798 00:59:50,587 --> 00:59:54,528 I'm gonna have to break out the emergency choccies to smooth this one over. 799 00:59:54,628 --> 00:59:55,921 Be good. 800 00:59:59,937 --> 01:00:04,857 - Another boring night in Dublin. - Same old, same old. 801 01:00:04,957 --> 01:00:07,095 - So I guess you were right. - About what? 802 01:00:07,195 --> 01:00:10,970 Hank Williams. That was the song you played me, wasn't it? 803 01:00:11,070 --> 01:00:13,878 I don't want to say I told you so. 804 01:00:15,903 --> 01:00:19,095 Oh, my God. You are absolutely covered in glitter! 805 01:00:19,195 --> 01:00:21,070 - No, I'm not. - You are. 806 01:00:21,170 --> 01:00:23,187 Were you making out with one of those drag queens or something? 807 01:00:23,287 --> 01:00:25,569 Best I ever got. 808 01:00:26,528 --> 01:00:31,637 Hey, that was so great. Valentine's Day in a gay bar. Drama! 809 01:00:31,737 --> 01:00:33,920 - You were brilliant too. - Thanks. 810 01:00:34,720 --> 01:00:38,887 Cool. So... what are you guys up to now? 811 01:00:38,987 --> 01:00:43,695 'Cause there's a house party over in the Northside, and it's going to be deadly. 812 01:00:43,795 --> 01:00:47,270 - You've got your flight in the morning. - Yeah, and it's past our bedtimes. 813 01:00:47,370 --> 01:00:49,920 Jesus, how old are you guys? 814 01:01:47,112 --> 01:01:48,703 So what are you guys studying? 815 01:01:50,128 --> 01:01:52,161 Engineering. 816 01:01:53,345 --> 01:01:55,128 That must be interesting. 817 01:01:55,928 --> 01:01:57,553 Not really. 818 01:01:57,653 --> 01:02:01,028 Well, you must be looking forward to graduating then? 819 01:02:01,128 --> 01:02:04,070 No. Not really. 820 01:02:04,170 --> 01:02:05,737 No jobs. 821 01:02:05,837 --> 01:02:08,407 Probably have to emigrate. 822 01:02:09,528 --> 01:02:12,228 What did you say was in that again? 823 01:02:12,328 --> 01:02:15,345 - What did you say was in that again? - Hash. 824 01:02:15,445 --> 01:02:19,053 It's strong. We don't usually get hash back home. It's mostly grass. 825 01:02:20,373 --> 01:02:23,213 Grass is class. 826 01:02:23,862 --> 01:02:25,953 Good shit. 827 01:02:43,837 --> 01:02:46,195 You definitely have to come to my 21st. 828 01:02:46,295 --> 01:02:48,848 - You a nineties baby? - You bet. 829 01:02:49,487 --> 01:02:52,569 - What about you? - '83. 830 01:02:54,228 --> 01:02:58,428 - That's, like, pre-everything. - Well, not everything. 831 01:02:58,528 --> 01:03:02,353 So, what's the story with your woman? Are you two, like, an item or... 832 01:03:02,453 --> 01:03:06,908 Yeah, actually we are. We're just on a little break at the moment. 833 01:03:07,008 --> 01:03:09,078 For how long? 834 01:03:09,820 --> 01:03:11,212 Eight years. 835 01:03:11,637 --> 01:03:14,353 What? He do the dirt on you or something? 836 01:03:14,453 --> 01:03:16,295 - Totally. - She's joking. 837 01:03:16,395 --> 01:03:18,803 Yes, but you did convince me that you were gonna come back, 838 01:03:18,903 --> 01:03:21,112 which I believed against my better judgment. 839 01:03:21,212 --> 01:03:23,304 And then, you changed your mind at the last second. 840 01:03:24,428 --> 01:03:26,287 So you are mad that I didn't come back? 841 01:03:26,387 --> 01:03:28,828 I'm not mad. I think you want me to be mad. 842 01:03:29,128 --> 01:03:31,526 Why would I want you to be mad? 843 01:03:31,626 --> 01:03:33,128 I don't know. 844 01:03:33,528 --> 01:03:38,684 Hey, I'm gonna go and be twenty somewhere. So... good luck. 845 01:03:40,228 --> 01:03:42,145 - Where's this coming from? - Where's it coming... 846 01:03:42,245 --> 01:03:44,887 Alan, if you're not happy with where you are in life, 847 01:03:44,987 --> 01:03:46,763 you should be doing something about it. 848 01:03:46,863 --> 01:03:49,945 Well, it's easy for you to say, Alice. You know, you seem to be doing okay. 849 01:03:50,045 --> 01:03:54,153 Oh, really? What's French for 'We don't like your drawings'? 850 01:03:54,253 --> 01:03:55,428 What do you mean? 851 01:03:55,528 --> 01:03:58,632 I didn't know what it was either until tonight. 852 01:04:06,103 --> 01:04:08,928 You must think I'm such a fucking idiot. 853 01:04:09,128 --> 01:04:11,960 No, not at all. 854 01:04:23,128 --> 01:04:26,352 God, we look so fucking stupid. 855 01:04:29,295 --> 01:04:32,270 I think your drawings are great, Alice. 856 01:04:33,212 --> 01:04:34,753 I've had two. 857 01:04:34,853 --> 01:04:36,678 - Two? - Two. 858 01:04:36,778 --> 01:04:41,345 - Two what? - Jobs. Drawing in 18 months. 859 01:04:41,445 --> 01:04:45,021 And now I'm... I'm... 860 01:04:45,740 --> 01:04:48,325 I'm fucked! 861 01:04:49,028 --> 01:04:50,437 You okay? 862 01:04:52,137 --> 01:04:53,828 Bazzer, it's the guards! 863 01:04:54,028 --> 01:04:56,345 Hide the feckin' yokes! 864 01:04:56,445 --> 01:04:58,943 - Oh, my God! - Where are you goin'? 865 01:05:04,828 --> 01:05:05,753 Alice! 866 01:05:05,853 --> 01:05:08,845 Alan, I have a plane to catch in the morning. I'm not spending the night in jail. 867 01:05:08,945 --> 01:05:11,245 Jail? We don't get blamed for anything here. 868 01:05:11,345 --> 01:05:12,487 It's not safe! 869 01:05:12,587 --> 01:05:14,653 I think that stuff's making you a little bit paranoid. 870 01:05:15,053 --> 01:05:17,220 - What the fuck? - She's freaking out. The cops are here. 871 01:05:17,520 --> 01:05:19,594 - What? - What if I fail a drug test? 872 01:05:21,097 --> 01:05:24,620 What are Irish prisons like? I've never even seen one, not on TV or anything! 873 01:05:24,720 --> 01:05:25,837 Why is that? Is there something... 874 01:05:28,053 --> 01:05:30,387 Do they make you do Irish dancing and shit? Because I can't dance! 875 01:05:30,487 --> 01:05:33,678 I can't dance at all! What are you people hiding? 876 01:05:33,778 --> 01:05:36,187 - Hey! Calm down! - I am calm! 877 01:05:36,287 --> 01:05:37,978 Do you trust me? 878 01:05:43,485 --> 01:05:45,721 One, two, three. 879 01:06:22,087 --> 01:06:24,578 Maybe show a bit of leg? 880 01:06:24,678 --> 01:06:29,462 Yeah. I could flash out a man boob, but it might cause an accident. 881 01:06:30,528 --> 01:06:33,179 We'll get home eventually. 882 01:06:40,253 --> 01:06:43,579 If it's any consolation about the job... 883 01:06:45,325 --> 01:06:50,587 I'm pretty sure now is the best time for things not to work out. 884 01:06:50,687 --> 01:06:52,612 You think? 885 01:06:52,712 --> 01:06:55,945 Who wants to be dealing with this crap in their forties? 886 01:06:56,045 --> 01:06:57,991 I mean, 887 01:06:58,091 --> 01:07:00,984 you're forty... which has its own problems. 888 01:07:02,853 --> 01:07:05,517 I've been stood up at the altar. 889 01:07:06,945 --> 01:07:09,137 Epic fail. 890 01:07:09,670 --> 01:07:12,018 I was devastated, 891 01:07:12,918 --> 01:07:18,528 but that is so much better than trying to break up 20 years later. 892 01:07:18,628 --> 01:07:22,703 And arguing over who owns which Lonnie Donegan album. 893 01:07:22,803 --> 01:07:24,845 He's great. 894 01:07:26,087 --> 01:07:27,957 Yeah. 895 01:07:30,495 --> 01:07:32,594 I should've known Wendy wasn't a keeper. 896 01:07:38,445 --> 01:07:41,062 We picked the best time to fuck this shit up is what I mean. 897 01:07:41,162 --> 01:07:42,387 Right. 898 01:07:50,170 --> 01:07:55,345 I guess a part of me always thought that maybe you just met someone else, 899 01:07:55,445 --> 01:08:01,230 and the internship thing was just a cover. 900 01:08:02,445 --> 01:08:04,944 I was just really scared. 901 01:08:07,528 --> 01:08:10,987 My family was here. My friends. 902 01:08:11,087 --> 01:08:14,712 My... career. 903 01:08:17,903 --> 01:08:20,925 Probably another year... 904 01:08:21,980 --> 01:08:27,639 before I even... thought of anyone else. 905 01:08:29,987 --> 01:08:32,364 Same here. 906 01:08:35,353 --> 01:08:36,895 Have you seen you? 907 01:08:40,545 --> 01:08:43,595 I'm not saying I haven't made up for it. 908 01:08:47,228 --> 01:08:50,516 We learn nothing from success. 909 01:08:52,003 --> 01:08:54,809 - To failure. - Absolutely. 910 01:08:57,170 --> 01:09:00,903 - Is this tour of Dublin over? - If you want. 911 01:09:01,003 --> 01:09:03,369 And if I don't? 912 01:09:04,128 --> 01:09:06,523 I know just the place. 913 01:10:04,170 --> 01:10:08,003 - Have you got enough? - Yeah. Just about. You? 914 01:10:08,103 --> 01:10:10,424 Yeah, grand. 915 01:10:11,570 --> 01:10:14,295 Can't believe you've never heard of one of these before. 916 01:10:14,395 --> 01:10:18,920 Yeah, well, we've had electricity for a while. So... 917 01:10:21,987 --> 01:10:23,803 - Jesus! - Is it too hot? 918 01:10:23,903 --> 01:10:25,687 Your feet are like ice! 919 01:10:26,944 --> 01:10:28,874 Sorry. 920 01:10:35,487 --> 01:10:37,213 Good night. 921 01:10:39,487 --> 01:10:41,846 Yeah, sleep tight. 922 01:10:47,128 --> 01:10:49,104 Why is it ribbed? 923 01:10:52,395 --> 01:10:54,736 It just is. 924 01:10:55,353 --> 01:10:57,812 My Granny's one was the same. 925 01:10:58,112 --> 01:11:01,577 It seems like a lot of trouble for a bottle. 926 01:11:23,228 --> 01:11:24,808 Alan. 927 01:11:53,353 --> 01:11:56,828 Alice! Alice, what time's your flight? 928 01:11:56,928 --> 01:11:58,267 What time's your flight? 929 01:11:58,367 --> 01:12:01,345 - What? - What time's your flight? 930 01:12:01,745 --> 01:12:03,028 Oh, fuck! 931 01:12:42,453 --> 01:12:46,553 Well, I guess we should be used to saying goodbye at this stage. 932 01:12:46,653 --> 01:12:48,687 Yeah. 933 01:12:49,187 --> 01:12:52,253 - Let's stay in touch, though, this time. - Definitely. 934 01:12:52,353 --> 01:12:54,645 - What's her name? - Alice Rothmayer. 935 01:12:54,745 --> 01:12:56,282 - 'Roth' what? - Rothmayer. 936 01:12:57,082 --> 01:12:59,303 Okay, I've got you a seat, but you really need to go now. 937 01:12:59,403 --> 01:13:01,312 And no more funny business. 938 01:13:01,412 --> 01:13:03,642 Thanks. 939 01:13:19,187 --> 01:13:22,593 - Well, I guess this is it. - Yeah. 940 01:13:24,087 --> 01:13:26,353 Take care of yourself. 941 01:13:26,453 --> 01:13:28,000 You too. 942 01:13:28,100 --> 01:13:30,420 You forgot your passport. You have to go now. 943 01:13:30,520 --> 01:13:32,762 - I can bring you through. - Okay, thanks. 944 01:13:32,862 --> 01:13:35,726 - Take the jacket. - No, no, keep it. It's not even mine. 945 01:13:36,403 --> 01:13:39,612 - You really need to go now. - Okay. 946 01:13:41,312 --> 01:13:43,322 Alice. 947 01:13:48,087 --> 01:13:50,120 Thanks for a great night. 948 01:13:51,720 --> 01:13:53,178 It's what I'm here for. 949 01:14:32,062 --> 01:14:36,417 You know, the first date I ever had with your dad was such a disaster. 950 01:14:36,517 --> 01:14:39,303 All he could talk about was his dog. 951 01:14:39,987 --> 01:14:44,820 A couple of day later, he rings. I tell him, 'I don't think I can do another dog evening.' 952 01:14:44,920 --> 01:14:49,045 He asked me to give him another chance. We met up a week later. 953 01:14:49,145 --> 01:14:52,737 Now, he'd spotted some books I had in my bag before. 954 01:14:52,837 --> 01:14:57,287 So in that week, he'd gone out and bought them and read them. 955 01:14:57,887 --> 01:15:00,528 I don't think we talked about dogs once. 956 01:15:00,628 --> 01:15:03,046 Well, maybe once. 957 01:15:12,287 --> 01:15:17,316 You can never tell how anything's going to turn out. Nobody knows. 958 01:15:19,453 --> 01:15:21,610 But a good memory is worth something. 959 01:15:21,710 --> 01:15:24,406 Yeah. Yeah, I know. 960 01:15:38,553 --> 01:15:40,540 Oh, shit! 961 01:15:40,640 --> 01:15:43,473 I'm so proud of you, kiddo. 962 01:15:45,145 --> 01:15:47,350 Why? I only ever mess things up. 963 01:15:48,587 --> 01:15:51,412 You lose when you stop trying. 964 01:15:51,512 --> 01:15:52,945 Fuck it. 965 01:15:53,545 --> 01:15:57,678 - You go home and get some rest. - No, it's alright. It's busy. 966 01:15:57,778 --> 01:16:00,070 That's an order. 967 01:16:14,945 --> 01:16:17,031 Are you getting them? 968 01:16:17,131 --> 01:16:19,005 Yeah. 969 01:16:19,862 --> 01:16:22,916 It's a keeper, alright. 970 01:16:28,812 --> 01:16:32,145 Final call on Aer Lingus flight EI105 to New York. 971 01:16:32,245 --> 01:16:35,707 This flight is now closing through Gate 410. 972 01:16:42,212 --> 01:16:44,795 Here's the great romancer. 973 01:16:44,895 --> 01:16:46,345 You guys not working today? 974 01:16:46,445 --> 01:16:49,537 Couldn't possibly face work after that shite last night. 975 01:16:49,637 --> 01:16:52,045 Actually, there's still some beers in the fridge. 976 01:16:52,145 --> 01:16:54,456 Bring us one of mine, would ya? 977 01:17:07,503 --> 01:17:10,254 Did Alice get off okay? 978 01:17:11,412 --> 01:17:13,232 Yeah. 979 01:17:14,778 --> 01:17:18,199 That's not one of mine. You know the beer I like. 980 01:17:18,820 --> 01:17:21,937 - Jeez, would you look at yourself? - What? 981 01:17:22,037 --> 01:17:24,562 Look, not all women out there are trying to screw you over every time, okay? 982 01:17:24,662 --> 01:17:26,637 Some of them, maybe, but there are lots of nice ones. 983 01:17:27,037 --> 01:17:28,903 Once bitten, twice shy. 984 01:17:29,003 --> 01:17:30,928 Joe, your wife left ya because you're the kind of guy 985 01:17:31,028 --> 01:17:33,715 that can fart his favourite TV theme tune, and somewhere along the line, 986 01:17:33,815 --> 01:17:36,503 that wasn't good enough for her. Now, I'm sorry, but it's true. 987 01:17:37,103 --> 01:17:41,286 Look, it's all painful, but if you're not in, you can't win. You gotta take a chance. 988 01:17:41,962 --> 01:17:44,404 You can't just give up. 989 01:17:49,003 --> 01:17:50,885 A bit harsh. 990 01:17:56,453 --> 01:17:59,587 - What are you doin'? - What does it look like I'm doin'? 991 01:17:59,687 --> 01:18:03,088 - Alan, this is crazy. - Yeah, I know. 992 01:18:03,188 --> 01:18:06,887 - What if she's a looper? - Then I'll have a story to tell. 993 01:18:06,987 --> 01:18:09,755 It's a long way to go. 994 01:18:10,287 --> 01:18:12,624 I'll let you know how it got on. 995 01:18:12,724 --> 01:18:14,570 Sorry, Joe, again. 996 01:18:14,670 --> 01:18:16,803 It was the theme tune from 'Frasier'. 997 01:18:16,903 --> 01:18:19,397 It's not easy to fart 'tossed salad and scrambled eggs'. 998 01:18:19,497 --> 01:18:21,637 - Here, take some money. - Dad, you've given me enough. 999 01:18:21,737 --> 01:18:24,770 Think of it as relationship insurance. 1000 01:18:24,870 --> 01:18:27,574 There's always a room for you here. 1001 01:18:30,470 --> 01:18:32,105 I hope it works out for ya. 1002 01:19:34,312 --> 01:19:37,129 I have to go back. 1003 01:19:39,512 --> 01:19:41,966 I don't have to stay here.