San Isidro women's psychiatric hospital
children's wing - 1998
The old people said
that sadness creates a hole in our hearts...
And that the spirit of Shapishico with fill it.
At first, the spirit goes unnoticed...
Hiding behind our eyes...
But in the dark...
It grows stronger.
Shapishico.
It drives us into madness...
Whispering in our ears until we sacrifice ourselves...
To set the spirit free.
Shapishico.
And it spreads...
Like a sickness.
The old people tell us these stories...
But they forget...
That these stories are true.
- Hello, sir... - How is it going, man?
-Michael.
I was here last night and...
I left my cell phone.
-Last night?
-Do you have a...
Lost and found?
-Lost and found?
-Yes.
Yes.
Yes! This one.
-Are you sure?
-Yes!
I have to call my girlfriend...
Otherwise, I'm fucked. You know what I mean?
Thank you.
You're the best. The best.
-Hi, Hector.
-Hello, Michael.
- You have a very generous grandmother.
The same type of gift over and over?
-She has Alzheimer's.
-If you need money...
I could help you find work.
It could be easier than...
Whatever you call this.
-Resourcefulness.
Besides I'm not really looking for a job.
I'm actually surprised you even sell cell phones in here.
-Cell phones pay the bills...
Everything else here is like a hobby.
-Strange hobby.
-I love history.
It's always changing.
New discoveries...
Truth brought to light.
Tomorrow everything we know about the past could be different.
-Not everything.
Bye, Hector.
-Good luck.
- Out! Out! Get the hell out my driveway!
Out!
-I'm sorry.
Danny?
Danny.
Danny!
-Fuck!
-Sir...
- Fuck, man! - I'm sorry!
Sir... I'm so sorry!
- Asshole! - I'm sorry!
- What? Get out. - I'm sorry!
- What are you doing in there? Get out of my car!
You little cunt! - Sir.
- Fuck! - Sir...
- What the hell is going on? Leave him alone!
-Mind your own business!
- When the cops get here, I'll tell them you almost killed this guy.
- Get out of here. - You get out!
- I'm watching you, fucker! - Get the hell out!
-What a couple of idiots.
-You'll get what you deserve!
-Are you okay?
-I'm okay, I should be fine.
-So what was that all about?
- Well... apparently, that guy is not a big fan
of people sleeping in the back seat of his car.
-So you're homeless?
-I prefer the term traveler.
It seems less...
-Pathetic?
-Yeah.
I guess.
I left home with enough money to last me a year and I've been gone for two.
-Why haven't you gone home?
I'm not quite ready for that.
Anyway, I'm Michael.
Thanks for...
-No, no it was cool.
Look, Medellin has worked hard to leave its past behind.
We don't need any dead Americans in the street.
I know some guys who have a place outside the city...
And they're having a little party tonight.
You should come, check it out.
Maybe they might be able to set you up with a place to stay.
Come by around 10!
-Hello?
Hello?
-Hey!
-I'm looking for melody.
-Come in, come in!
-Hey! You!
Come here.
How are you, my friend?
-I'm Michael.
-Michael?
Do you know any Michael?
Pauly, you know any Michael?
-No!
-Melody invited me.
-Melody?
Nope.
Don't know any melody.
Nope!
-It's my bad, sorry guys.
-No wait!
Hey!
It's all right, okay?
No, stay come on.
See, we are having a party...
And you're here...
So...
Have a seat...
Take a load off.
Sit down!
Where are you from, Michael?
-San Diego.
-San Diego?
You are a long way from home.
Excuse me, I forgot my manners.
You need a drink.
And you, Vinnie, you've had too much...
As always.
Here.
-I'm good.
-I'm offering you a drink.
It's disrespectful to turn it down.
-Manuela!
-Michael.
Do you know the sound...
A dead American makes...
In Medellin?
You hear it?
That's it.
Nothing.
Jacob!
-Melody!
-Playing nice?
- Oh, my Princess, yes, yes, we are playing nice.
You know, a little scare, just makes a boy into a man.
Right, Michael?
-Yeah.
We were just getting to know each other.
-Yes!
That is right. We are just getting to know each other.
Nothing more.
To old friends...
And to new.
Welcome to the house of the dead men.
-This...
This is the start of a good relationship.
I think.
Manuela!
The music!
-Hello there.
How are you feeling?
-Like shit.
What happened?
-See for yourself.
The night wasn't all bad.
Do you like it?
-Yeah, good picture.
-Hey so, who's Danny?
Yeah, you were saying his name last night.
-He's my baby brother.
He died.
-I'm sorry.
-Good, you're awake.
Come on, let me show you around.
-I have to go anyway.
- Are you sure? - Yeah.
You have fun.
- Are you sure? - Yeah.
Behave yourself.
-Always.
She's a good girl.
Come on.
Out here, nobody fucks with us.
We are completely off the grid.
What was this place?
It was a psychiatric hospital for women.
Shut down 15 years ago.
-Why did they close it down?
- It has what I guess you would call a "disturbing past."
Down this hallway, there was a boy...
Mauricio Rojas.
He was born here.
All the children in this wing were born here.
Mauricio...
Killed himself.
Drove the splintered end of a headboard right through his chest.
-Jesus.
-Later that same night,
all the children in this wing committed suicide.
They slit their wrists
with glass from a broken lightbulb.
No one knows why.
I think the doctors...
They fucked them up.
They were tired of living in these cages...
So they got out on their own terms.
Let's get the fuck out of here.
Welcome home.
-Thanks.
Hello?
-Freedom.
When I look at you, I don't see freedom.
I see slaves.
Slaves to the past...
To regret.
The only true freedom lies in death.
And as one of the dead men...
Ready to die!
-I can tell you...
Freedom...
It feels...
Fucking good!
-Michael...
Come up here.
- I'm, I'm good where I am, thanks.
-No you're not.
You're living in a fucking bubble...
And it's about time it's popped.
Come on.
That's it, there you go.
Michael here, he needs a place to stay.
But if he wants to be one of us...
There's one more thing he needs.
One foot in the grave.
But first a toast...
To new beginnings!
Up! Down! Center! Inside!
-And now...
Now a real drink.
-What's that?
-A friend wouldn't ask.
-What the fuck was that?
-Oh. That...
was just the beginning.
Let's fucking party!
-Bye, Michael.
Danny?
Danny.
-Hey!
Hey!
Michael!
Hey!
Look at me.
Michael, are you with me?
-Yes?
-You see me?
-Yeah.
There's someone standing right in front of you.
Look.
Can you see?
Yes?
Michael...
It's someone you hate.
Someone...
You want to see dead.
Hey.
Look.
Do it.
Michael... Michael!
You with me? Yes?
Hush.
Congratulations,
you just took your first step to becoming a dead man.
So what the hell did you give me last night?
- Blackstar. It's similar to yagé.
Various vines and roots from the jungle.
Tourists call it ayahuasca.
- Wait. You gave me fucking ayahuasca?
- It helps you open your mind to the spiritual world
confronting your personal demons.
Today, it is used in healing ceremonies.
Shit like that.
Still... a little heads-up would've been nice.
- What would be the fun of that?
- This food is disgusting! - It has hairs on it.
Do me a favor and bring me a plate of good food.
Sorry, sir. They'll make you a new one.
- Of all the places in the world, why Medellin?
-I was born here.
My mom was Colombian.
- I knew there was something about you I liked.
- She died when I was five. I don't remember her at all.
My dad was stationed here when they met and...
He didn't even know I was born until she died.
After she passed, he came down and took me up to San Diego.
-Now you're back.
- How about you? You don't sound like you are from around here.
-No, I was born in this city.
But I spent most of my time traveling.
Living with shamans in Chile, Peru...
Studying at ashrams in India.
Learning the intricacies of life...
And death.
So what made you come back?
"Chimba."
Pussy.
-No.
- Home. - Yeah.
- It has a way of calling us back.
Let me ask you a question.
If you knew you had one year left to live...
How would you live the rest of your life?
You see, life is just a long, scenic drive off of a cliff.
Most people try to distract themselves along the way.
They turn to god or try to live a meaningful life.
But at the end of the road,
whether you're a good person...
Or a son of a bitch...
It's all the same cliff.
- So just do whatever the hell we want?
-Exactly.
Shapishico.
- Let me show you some things your boyfriend can't. Come on!
Why are you playing hard to get?
Huh?
- See, me and the others, we live as if we are already dead.
A dead man has no responsibilities.
He does not live for anyone else.
He doesn't worry of how he will make a living.
A dead man has no past.
-A dead man has no regrets.
- We do what we want, when we want...
Fuck everything else.
-Wait right here.
Excuse me, sir.
- Yes? - Excuse my Spanish.
What is this area called? - Santo Domingo.
- Is being a dead man something you want?
Let's go.
Three and a half kilometers of Medellin's finest curves.
Even finer than Pauly's mother.
This is insane.
- The things you fear, they control you.
If you fear death, then death will control you.
To be one of us, you must fear nothing.
-Are you scared, Michael?
- I'm not scared. I just don't want to die.
- "I'm not scared. I just don't want to die."
I should have brought my extra large tampons.
What for?
-For this giant pussy.
-Live like you're already dead.
Life is the most fun that way.
Let's go!
-Check this fucker out!
- Are you scared, Michael? - What are you doing?
Let me go, fuck.
Let me go!
Come on. Let me go!
-Hey you made it!
-I almost died.
-Yeah, that was the point.
-Almost.
- You think this is a fucking joke?
-Easy guys, easy.
When you were up on that hill, you were afraid to die.
But you faced it.
And now how do you feel?
Your muscles are tense,
your spine tingles, your hair is standing on end, it's electric.
You're the most alive
when you're close to death.
This is how we live.
What do you want, Michael?
-More.
People think they can tell us how to live.
They think because they're older,
they have all of the answers.
But you know what?
That's not true.
You want to know why I became a dead man?
Because all we know is that we are here today...
And that's all that matters.
Old people, they get stuck thinking about the past.
They tell us to understand what we do today is important tomorrow.
But guess what? It's not, at all.
What matters is right here, right now.
The past is gone.
Danny?
Are you all right?
-You're just seeing things...
Just seeing things.
- Dude, we're gonna have the best gear.
I'm gonna cash in some favors so we'll get the works. Full sound package.
- I'm going to make sure we have a river of pharmaceuticals...
And narcotics running through this place.
Weed, weed, weed, tons of weed.
- Get it together, Michael, come on.
-Ketamine. Ghb.
-And Blackstar.
-Blackstar?
-I want everybody on it.
-No, no, not if you want it...
I'll get it for you.
This is going to be our biggest party yet.
-It's just in your head.
You're just seeing things.
-Michael.
What are you seeing?
- Nothing man. I'm, I'm...
I'm good.
-Oh really?
-Yeah, I'm okay.
Let's go.
Shapishico.
No!
Help!
Michael! Hey!
Hey! Michael!
Hey! Hey! Stop!
Relax.
Hey! Relax! - What's going on?
- Just night terrors, I get them sometimes too.
Just relax. You're fine, you're fine.
You should get that cleaned up.
- Doesn't this place kind of freak you out?
-Oh, are you scared?
-What?
You're not at all?
-I'm ready for anything.
Come on, let's race.
- All right. - On three.
Three!
-Cheater!
-Loser!
-I'm stuck!
There.
Melody?
Melody.
- Oh my god... It's not funny.
-I really got you, didn't I?
- Yeah, you scared the living shit out of me.
-That was the idea.
-Where did you get that?
- Come on. Come on, I'll show you.
Come on.
Right here.
Check this out.
- It's one of the kids who killed himself.
- I guess there's no reason to move their files if they're dead, right?
-Yeah, I guess.
Come on jump, let's go.
Let's go!
- Are you sure about this? - Yeah!
I've done this a million times. Trust me.
See? It wasn't hard. Come on.
Come on, Michael.
- Really? Are you going to splash me right now?
Are you serious?
You're in so much trouble. - Oh really?
-You're in so much trouble.
- You're just seeing things. You're just seeing things.
- Where are you going? What, what's wrong?
Michael!
What's wrong?
-My little brother Danny...
I saw him in the water.
-There's nobody there.
You're fine.
-I've been seeing things.
Since that first time at the hospital, something is wrong with me.
I used to have nightmares, but this is...
This is worse.
It's like I feel him with... With me everywhere I go.
-It must be the stuff you drank.
It's not real.
-It's my fault Danny died.
It's my fault that he's gone.
-You loved him, right?
-Of course.
-Then I'm sure he knew that
and he would have forgiven you.
Mauricio, take off the mask while we're together. -No.
- Take it off, nothing will happen to you.
- No, I'm not taking off the mask.
- Are you still having nightmares?
- They're not nightmares if I have them when I'm awake.
Shapishico.
- Shapishico is just a story, it's not real. Relax. Look...
- Excuse me, doctor. - It's time for his medicine.
- Let's just do this. Take it off while we're here, just the two of us.
-No!
-Mauricio take your medicine.
- I'm not taking off the mask. - It will be okay.
-No! I don't want to.
- You have to take it. It will help you, don't worry.
-It makes things worse.
No!
I'm not going to take it!
-Relax.
You see? Nothing happened.
It's ok.
-No, Shapishico.
- Shapishico is just a story, it's not real.
Shapishico.
-No.
Shapishico.
-Are you lost?
-Nope, I'm just looking around.
-Jacob might want you here.
But the rest of us don't.
- Really? - Yes.
Be careful.
Best to leave the dead alone.
- You don't think - I understand you?
- Excuse me, doctor. - It's time for his medicine.
- I'm not taking the medicine. - Mauricio, don't worry, it's nothing...
- No, I'm not taking it off. - Relax.
- You should stick to cell phones.
Homemade masks are not a big seller.
- I don't want to sell it. There's something written in the back of it.
- It's an inscription to ward off evil spirits.
The kids do it with things like the boogeyman.
But "Shapishico," that's interesting.
-Why? What is "Shapishico"?
- It's a part of the folklore here.
It's a kind of ancient evil.
It's a spirit that would infect the bodies of men...
Latching to their own suffering until it destroys them.
Some ancient tribes used yagé as a conduit between Shapishico and the child,
believing that it would grow inside of him.
Until when the spirit was strong enough...
They held a ceremony with the rest of the tribe where they drank yagé...
And the infected would sacrifice himself releasing the spirit.
Self-sacrifices are essential for the ritual.
- So this guy would kill himself, infecting everybody, why?
-It's only purpose is to spread.
It drives you into madness to the point where one takes his own life.
- Do people still believe this stuff?
-Spirits, demons, monsters...
They are just words we created for what we don't understand.
But beneath the superstition, there is truth.
-Do you think I can borrow this?
-Just be careful with it.
There are not many of those.
-I'll take care of it.
Thanks, Hector.
Take care.
-Hey.
- Melody tells me she's worried about you.
She says, you've been seeing things, something about your brother?
You know, I've been there.
I've seen the things that you are seeing.
-What are you talking about?
-We all have.
It's part of being one of us.
Your eyes are open for the first time and the light is blinding.
- Why didn't you tell me all this before?
-I did.
I told you the yagé would open your mind to the spiritual world...
To help you confront your demons...
To embrace them.
-How do I make it stop?
- When you understand that nothing matters,
not life, not death,
then you will be ready.
-I'm ready now.
This road was once part
of the Aburrá trail.
They believed that this trail would lead to the top of the world.
And as a rite of passage...
A boy...
Would out go into the night...
Find the trail...
To face the darkness alone.
When the Spaniards came...
The Aburrá people, they were overrun...
But instead of surrendering,
the warriors, they marched
to the top of the trail
and they hung themselves.
For they believed it was better
to die free...
Than to live as a slave.
And to this day, their sacrifice for freedom is honored.
Hundreds...
Gather each year...
To ride this trail.
- That's why you brought me here? To climb a trail?
-Shit!
- You want to see a stampede, Michael?
It's a pure animal instinct,
a group of individuals with a singular mind. It's chaos!
You put a man in front of a stampede, his first instinct is to run.
-We don't run.
You stay on the road until it's over.
-Until what's over?
-The stampede.
Remember, you're already dead.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, right there.
-Yo bitch!
What the fuck are you doing?
-What?
- Are you fucking crazy? You're tagging over mine.
- What? That faded thing, you can't claim that.
- Don't touch her! - Michael. No, it's okay.
- What's up, gringo? Are you a tough guy?
-Shh! Shh! Shh!
-Your tag... was shit.
- You must have inked it with your pussy.
- It was actually your girlfriend's pussy.
This doesn't concern you. It's none of your business.
I really don't want a beef with you.
-It is my business now.
- What's up, you son of a bitch! Back off!
You too, motherfuckers. What's up?
-Cute knife, faggot.
Get down on the ground.
On the ground!
-Don't think.
Just do it.
-Do it. Do it.
Finish it. Finish it.
-Come on! Come on!
-Who's the tough guy now, huh?
-Welcome to the dead men.
-Remember this feeling.
It will be with you until the day you die.
Tomorrow night, at our party,
we're celebrating in your honor.
To Michael!
-What is all this?
-We're celebrating.
-What?
I'm a dead man now.
Come on, I need to talk to you.
-Are you serious, right now?
-Yes, come on.
-I thought you wanted this.
You brought me here.
- I didn't bring you here to be one of them.
I brought you here because you didn't have anywhere else to go.
Look, I really wanted to help you.
-I don't need your help.
You know, Jacob doesn't have all the answers.
You don't have to be him. - This isn't about Jacob.
-This is about me.
And I'm feeling fucking great.
And if you cared about me...
You'd be happy for me.
You know what?
I'm done caring about insignificant shit.
-So I'm insignificant?
Fuck you!
-Hey!
- You're hurting me. - Good.
- You know, some tattoo doesn't change who you are.
You think being like them makes you stronger, you're weak.
A scared little boy running away from his problems.
I thought you were better than this.
-Men. Am I right?
-Melody!
Melody?
Danny...
Danny?
Danny.
Danny...
Danny.
-Vince! Vince! Get an ambulance!
What happened?
Vince!
Vince! Answer me! Answer me, please!
Shapishico.
Self-sacrifices are essential for the ritual.
- Hector, I need you. Hector, I need you!
- What happened? What happened?
- I took the yagé... I've been having nightmares, only while I'm awake.
I don't know, I don't know what to do. I need your help, okay?
-What are you talking about?
Sit down, sit down.
- My friend Vince slit his wrists.
We were seeing the same things you showed us with that book.
If I don't do something, the same thing is going to happen to me.
- If this has something to do with yagé, you need to talk to you Taita.
-With what?
-Your Taita.
A shaman. Who was leading your ceremony?
- Nobody was. They just gave me that shit and I took it.
-Yagé is not some street drug.
It's a doorway to a spiritual life.
And without a Taita, you have left that door open.
Whoever gave you the yagé
would have known that.
- It was those, these guys that I've been staying with at this abandoned hospital.
-I know someone who can help.
Many claim to understand yagé,
but they are liars and manipulators.
What you're seeing is not your brother.
There is a very dark force inside you, using your feelings against you.
-Shapishico.
The tribes of Shapishico died off, but the spirit remained.
Their killings, their sacrifices and rituals...
The hospital lives at the heart of where all this took place.
That evil is responsible for what happened to the children there.
They wanted to resurrect the spirit...
To create a new generation of followers.
-But they all died, right?
-Not all of them.
-We are closing now for today.
-We are closing out today.
- It's okay, I'm just returning this for a friend.
Shapishico demands a sacrifice.
But using yagé with proper intentions will give you the chance to confront it.
We must begin now.
This will help you control your anxiety.
-You know I heard about Vince.
I'm so sorry.
I don't know what to say.
-There's nothing to say.
Death is just part of who we are.
We must know to accept it.
The spirit is strong within you.
You are the ideal sacrifice.
For centuries Shapishico has claimed many lives.
You must confront it.
Let it settle with you.
And concentrate.
Turn your thoughts within.
Within, you will find the truth.
And with that truth, you can fight the evil.
Do you know where Michael is?
I need to talk to him.
- Or you can talk to him tonight...
At the party.
- You know I can't believe you're still having the party.
- It's what Vince would've wanted.
- Come on, Danny. I've done this a million times, you'll be fine.
- I'm scared. - I'm not going down with you!
Either you jump or you go down by yourself.
Jump!
-No!
-Come on!
-No!
-Jump!
-Danny! Danny!
There is a very dark force inside you.
It's a spirit that would infect the bodies of men...
Latching to their own suffering until it destroyed them.
What you are seeing is not your brother.
-You're not Danny.
You're not my brother.
You're not Danny.
You're not my brother!
You're not Danny!
You're not my brother!
- Shapishico was in me when I pushed Danny.
- No, wait. The force is more powerful than I imagined.
Don't go! We must finish the ritual!
Wait!
It's in me.
-Hector?
What?
-Hector?
Hector!
Hector...
No... Hector.
-Jacob.
-Michael!
Melody, where are you?
All the children in this wing were born here.
I think the doctors, they fucked them up.
-It makes everything worse.
- Everyone died? - Not everyone.
- So they got out on their own terms.
Your eyes are open for the first time and the light is blinding.
Home. It has a way of calling us back.
- You're living in a fucking bubble...
And it's about time it is popped.
-Michael, come with me.
-Welcome home.
Goodbye, Michael.
-Michael, Michael...
What's wrong with you.
Are you okay?
-All this time...
All this time all these things I've been seeing, they're not...
They're not hallucinations.
They're memories.
I was born here...
In this hospital.
- What are you talking about, Michael?
-Jacob was too.
We were raised here.
- Michael, you're scaring me. What's going on with you?
The doctors, they gave us yagé.
They must have.
We are both infected.
-Goodbye, Michael.
- It's Jacob. He killed my friend Hector, we have to leave right now.
- No, wait a minute. I'm not going with you.
-Melody, you have to trust me.
I promise I'll tell you everything,
but right now we don't have time, we have to leave now.
-These doors are never locked.
-It's the ritual.
Come on!
-Michael!
Michael!
- Melody!
- Michael! Michael! - Melody!
Melody!
Let go!
-Melody!
-Welcome home, Michael.
It's glad to have you back.
-Let me go!
-Back off! Back off!
I'll let her go, I'll let her go.
Okay?
-Fuck you!
-Shut up.
See, melody, I need you... Because Michael has to do something for me,
and I don't think he is going to go through with it unless I have this.
-I know what you're doing.
I know why I'm here.
I remember everything.
- You have no idea how badly I've been wanting to tell you.
It's truly been killing me.
-What happened to us...
What they did to us...
Was wrong.
-No.
It was a gift.
You hid from it, I embraced it.
It's always been there, Michael, hiding... behind your eyes.
We're the same.
-I'm not a killer.
-Really?
And what would your brother say about that?
I want to ask you something Michael, did he scream?
Did you watch him tumble, Michael?
Did that feel powerful?
You felt the strength, Michael.
You felt the strength of generations.
Mauricio's sacrifice was the start a new generation.
We survived because we were strong,
and it's greater in us than it has been in anyone before.
We have a chance to finish what he started!
-Nobody else has to die.
- We all have to die. - Jacob, please.
- Everyone dies! Back off. Do you want me to cut her?
You see, Michael?
Tonight everyone down there has Blackstar running through their veins.
It's a yagé derivative,
an ancient drug with 21st century distribution.
- Everything you've been through has been leading you to this moment.
-I've been preparing you.
Ready to die?
-It can stop here.
You don't have to do this. - No.
See, it has to be one of us, and I'd prefer it if it was you.
- I think if you came here for little melody, then perhaps...
You'll die for her.
So I want you to jump off the roof.
Sacrifice yourself.
You can die just like your brother.
No, no, no...
Shh!
Yeah?
Come here.
This is why you're here.
Huh? Come on.
-Let's go.
-Who's the tough guy now?
- You're going to be fine, okay, Michael?
Hang on, okay?
I'm taking you to the hospital, okay?
Then we can go wherever you want, Michael.
Please stay with me.
-Just hang on with me, Michael.
Can you hear me?
Listen to me.
- Where do you want to go, Michael?
Where do you want to go?
-Home.
The old people said
that sadness creates a hole in our hearts...
And that the spirit of Shapishico will fill it.
It drives us into madness...
Whispering in our ears until we sacrifice ourselves...
To set the spirit free.
- Ready to die.
And it spreads like a sickness.