THE KILLER ROBOTS!
CRASH AND BURN
Subrip: Pix
Beyond time and space lies a
dimension where machines rule the universe.
And I, Lord Mot, rule the machines.
Attack!
Limb from limb, rip!
Well Rich, it looks like we
got a couple more contestants
to add to the arena!
You're right on the money there, Benson.
Let's fire up the tubes and see what kind
of criminal transgressors we can come up with.
Yeah!
Sorry about this, brother.
Time to make an exit.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is unprecedented!
No one's ever defeated Xanthus.
Yet there he lies!
It's a horrible scene here at the arena, Ted.
It looks like we're gonna have
to activate Hyperion.
That's right, Scooter.
Hyperion is one of our deadliest warriors.
Once he's activated, he will not
stop until everyone's destroyed.
Carry on!
Guys, dames, bros, comrades!
We gotta work together.
Those things are gonna pick us apart one by one!
We're not gonna win this, Strobo.
They've got the game rigged and we're here to lose.
If I have to work with you bozos,
you're gonna have to take orders from me!
I'm coming for you, little robots.
That's right, little androids!
Run!
We've got a show to put on!
What the hell is this?
I am Hyperion!
Serious damn firepower.
All right, let's wrap this up.
Bingo!
I know you're out there!
I can smell your heat signatures.
Get off my head!
This is all going to hell, Jim!
I don't even know why I come into work anymore.
It's a crappy day at the Arena of Death, Dave.
But that's why we're gonna fire up
the Medusa Oblongata!
Medusa Oblongata, just look at that face.
Let the devastation begin!
Getting it done, getting it done, let's do it.
There you go.
La la la.
Take it easy out there!
Okay, here we go!
La la la, fire!
Sorry!
Hi, my name is Medusa! What's yours?
No, no!
Well Bob, I think it's time
to alert security, don't you?
Shame on you, Alex.
We don't wanna panic the crowd, do we?
I don't wanna play anymore!
Activate security personnel!
La la la.
Destroy, destroy, destroy!
Hi guys, it's me again.
Yay, this is fun!
No, I don't like you anymore!
On that note.
Make way!
Freedom, run!
Where'd it go?
Okay, on the count of three we run for the door!
One, two, three!
-Hey. -What's happening?
Welcome, androids.
We have resurrected you for a highly sensitive mission.
How much are
highly sensitive missions paying these days?
We don't work for free you know!
Your payment will be the knowledge
that you have helped usher in a
new age of enlightenment and prosperity.
Silence!
You will travel to the asteroid city of Acheron
and meet up with your contact Betacron.
From there, he will lead you to the
artificial planet of Vidya.
Wait a second, that place is haunted!
Upon your arrival,
and as a result of a virus inflicted
by my old enemy, Lord Mot, you will be
assaulted by all manner of killer machines and robots.
You must act quickly and administer
an antiviral code to restore the planet's
inhabitants to their natural, peaceful state.
Once you have found success, the universe will
open up, spilling forth its secrets,
and bathing the planet Vidya in its song.
A new age of thought and reasoning
shall spring forth and spread through our galaxy.
Okay, whatever you say, pal!
We're gonna need some big guns!
And a fast ship.
And some fast strippers with big guns!
They have found us!
There's not much time.
Betacron will show you the way.
Wha?
Where the hell is e.
Can someone please tell me what the hell's going on?
This is all just an illusion, Strobo.
We're just puppets in an inter-dimensional
cosmic stage play created and destroyed
for the amusement of others.
There's our ride outta here.
Yeah, I'll believe that when I'm sitting in it!
Scanning, scanning, scanners scanning.
Target acquired.
All right guys, hang on there.
I got it, I got it.
Desecron!
Dark forces have arisen and threaten the great algorithm.
Leave me alone, you're not even real!
Arrrrgh!
You will destroy our enemies
and protect the great algorithm!
My name is Bill Carson and these
are my friends Derek, Kyle, and Bentley.
There's absolutely nothing suspicious
about us and we did not fabricate our names.
You're not giving us a look
of misgiving, are you?
My batteries are running low.
Wake me up when you hear something.
Yeah!
Hell, I think I'm gonna head downtown
and experience some local culture.
A most delightful idea, Max.
We can sample some of the area's
famous museums and historic landmarks.
Maybe even ride a trolley.
Trog like pretty lights!
Hello, Skippy!
Have you found what I've been looking for?
Yeah baby!
Shake it shake it!
I too am eager and without inhibition.
March, march, march!
Seek and destroy!
Sensors activated.
Scanning, scanning, scanning.
Machines engaged.
Hey, we already paid you guys,
already. Hey we already paid your,
money, get out of here, get out of my club!
Leave my club alone!
Initiate hard scan, surrender, surrender.
Submit, submit, surrender, surrender.
Hey, what's going on in there?
Faster, faster!
Search and destroy,
search and destroy!
Initiate scanners.
Scanning, scanning, scanning.
Max, I am no longer having fun.
You know, when I saw the sign for
ass buffing, I thought it meant something else.
There's the space port!
Lie-core store!
Surrender, surrender!
Deactivate yourself!
Destroy, destroy, destroy!
They wanted $6 for this bottle
of wine, so I stole it!
Stop, thief!
Scanning, scanning.
They've got our getaway ship.
I suggest we go next door and take whatever's in there.
Intruders surrender!
You ever notice how we always
fall for the same damn tricks?
Androids!
Proceed to port three and rendezvous with Betacron!
I will dispose of the commandos.
Welcome, friends.
I am Betacron.
Follow me.
Yeah, you got it.
Yeah, okay, let's go.
The turtle's knitting the sweater,
I repeat, the turtle is knitting the sweater.
I'm on my way.
Rhea, we're powering up the main engines.
We'll be forced to lift off in approximately 45 seconds.
The turtle is wearing a sweater.
Our targets are heading for the
hyperspace safety zone.
Show no mercy!
The CPU for Vidya s
located on the artificial moon of lya.
Once we dock on lya, the strike team,
that's you, will go in first and
secure the area from any hostile
cybernetics that might appear.
Rhea and I will then proceed to the CPU chamber.
Once there, I will insert the antivirus
punch card into the main interface.
Once initiated, the program should
start a chain reaction and restore
the planet to health within several hours.
I have to hand it to you Betacron,
the plan you just presented to us
appears to be 100% flawless.
Yes, I agree.
It's bound to go off without a hitch.
Yeah, nothing bad happen
in next 10 minutes.
I suggest we celebrate beforehand
with this bottle of 5,000 Proof ass wax!
Glass wax!
Yeah.
Intruders are entering the Vidyan System.
They will pay for their trespass!
Activate the Kraycon!
What, what the hell, the wing just fell off!
We are being pursued.
Please sir, you're embarrassing yourself!
I have a Class 11 pilot's license.
Let me show you.
Sorry about that.
Looks like there's a little bit
of play at the levers here.
Damn it Auto, you don't know what you're doing.
Yeah Auto, you suck at this.
Patience, my robotic friends.
This is like a game of Nebulonian Chess.
I'm actually several moves ahead of our monstrous foe.
You know, thing's obviously broken.
Maybe you should go back to flying this trap.
The electronic shields have failed.
We must abandon ship.
Quickly to the escape capsules.
Ladies first.
I'm a woman, or a child, whatever!
Get out of the way, move!
Sensors indicate a life boat has
been ejected from the intruder's ship.
Stop jiggling.
I can't stop!
Hey, look at that!
Let's see how they faire against the Skyzore.
I will admit, none of you are perfect,
but you have done well despite the circumstances.
Thank you, Betacron.
If you must know it's because of
your leadership that we've survived this far.
Yeah, I don't know what we'd do
if you were to die unexpectedly.
Thank you, Max.
I am fond of you as well.
No, I mean literally.
I don't know what the hell's going on here.
So I tells him you can't talk to
me like that, I ain't got no serial algorithms!
Stand down, my friend.
They're infected by the computer virus.
They could transfer to you if you get too close.
Back, you creatures!
Back, I say!
Quickly, to the roof.
My power is without limit.
I will find you!
This will take us to the service rocket.
Let's fire this baby up!
Max, we're gonna leave you!
Fiddlesticks!
It's about damn time.
What happened to Betacron?!
Time is running out.
You must take the antivirus punch card
and find your way to a service rocket.
The planet is hostile, but it will
help you when you least expect it.
Trog, you're the hardest to kill, brother.
Betacron, pull yourself together, man!
This place is mad!
Mad, I say!
Come on!
Really?!
Betacron!
Why Trog can say?!
Me sorry.
We have entered the Vidyan system, Desecron.
Alert all battle stations.
Patch us through to lya.
We are receiving a
transmission from an approaching ship.
Gods of lya, I am Desecron!
I've come in the name of the great algorithm.
Execute code 1-Z, subsystem Delta,
5-9-X, Alpha, Beta, 9-5-7.
Access denied.
They have launched missiles!
Inconceivable!
Activate shields!
We've lost all power!
Controls are not responding!
Mot be damned, you've doomed us all!
Intruders have survived the crash.
Where are they?
They have entered the Blackout Zone.
Great Gods of lya!
Why have you forsaken us?!
We bring you sacrifices yet you
no longer hear our cries!
Great Aton, colossus of the forbidden project!
Mohana, invaders from the beyond
have infiltrated our world.
Find them for me and you will know peace.
We will find these invaders, great Aton!
We will bring them to you and
show them the everlasting bliss!
Look at all that crap out there, Auto.
Somebody should clean it up right away.
Hey, anybody need a hand?
A hand?
Anybody need a hand?
That's funny, right?
Anybody need a hand?
Man, look at that!
Let's get a move on!
He is infected with the virus.
Our power and ammunition is limited.
I suggest we fall back and find
an energy source to recharge our weapons.
All right you droogs, close rank and fall back!
You have failed your mission, Desecron!
It's you who have failed.
Your codes no longer have value here.
The Vidyans have turned against us.
Then it is true.
The virus has possessed Vidya beyond
our primary reasoning.
Very well, prepare to receive the
self destruction protocol.
What?!
Open your mind to me, Desecron.
I will show you your future!
With these new codes, you will raise
an army of robot zombies.
Yes, and before the universe can
open up, you will destroy the transceiver.
Rise, Desecron, rise!
Use the codes I have given you!
Control their minds!
Yes, use the power within you!
Lead them!
I'm out of juice!
Head for the hills!
Slow down, I think we lost him.
My back.
Good job, savage primitive.
I am Tahana Mechahana of the wastelands.
My friends call me Tahana.
Okay, Tahana.
Hey I'm all right!
Hey, I'm okay!
Your bow is strong and your eye keen, Tahana.
I am Rhea.
Surprise!
Thank you, my shiny friend.
I too am impressed by your skills
against the mighty Carnok.
All right, that's enough.
My camp is several miles to the north.
It is heavily fortified.
We will be safe there.
Comrades, I have danced upon
the abyss and return with a new vision.
Follow my charge and fear not,
for a giant invisible head watches over us all.
The camp, it's been attacked!
Aella, Manu!
My feet won't work today.
Oof!
There's gotta be some way out of here.
Robot ladder.
Robot ladder, brother.
Aella, you still function.
What the hell is wrong with you?
Aella's our oracle, she can see
into the future and the past.
Well damn, I guess you
had a bad day today?
No.
Hey, goodbye brother!
Aton!
Great eye in the sky!
Take this poor unfortunate soul
and cleanse him of his wasted life.
And protect us from the horrors of chaos!
Incoming!
What's going on up there?
You can't get five minutes in this place.
Hey watch that foot!
Somebody get under Trog!
See you guys later!
Hey wait for us!
We're gonna need that oracle!
Lift with your back, not with your legs.
Smash!
Yeah, Trog!
Go away, assholes!
Scavengers!
I've come to implore you!
Give yourselves to the great Aton
and you will know peace.
Mohana, the end of times is upon us.
We must rescue the oracle or the
great darkness will envelop us all.
Dot not lecture me on matters of the Gods!
We don't have time for this, take him down!
Die die die die die die!
Boss, you don't look so good.
What the?
Well I think I'll wait in here
until this all blows over.
Retreat!
We have failed great Aton this day!
Retreat!
Hey wait a minute!
Stop laughing at me!
We're in luck.
This duct leads to Pluton's lair.
That's pretty good!
Hey!
Hey, we're up here!
Stay there, we're coming up!
Whatever.
Eep!
Well that's our cue.
Show us the way, young lady.
Intruders have re-emerged
upon the sensor grid.
Good, activate the tower droids.
Gods of lya, hear my cries!
Great Aton, slayer of time!
Conquerer of the infinite!
We have brought you sacrifices!
Take their life energy, so we my
have the power we need to sustain our people!
Aton!
Ingest their souls and return or
great grid to its former glory!
Give us purpose!
Give us a reason for being!
Mohana, there's no one there.
Come on, everybody!
Hold onto my feet!
Dammit Auto. Stop daydreaming!
Hand me one of those Mekaheka Lites.
I'm done with all of this.
Y'all can take it home for all I care.
Don't do it!
What the?
Cowards!
Face your enemy!
You rusty nugget!
Get out of the way!
What, how dare you?!
I'm a level three warlord!
More like a level three fatass!
You're blocking out the sun, man.
I will destroy you!
Yeah, come on baby!
I regret my life decisions!
Let's go, Max.
It's all up to us now.
I see you, little robots.
And I will trap you.
Magnetic fields activated.
I think we can do this.
Look at you, stuck to the ground!
You have no place to go!
Aton watches all!
Yeah, so there's two guys and
they're just standing in the middle
of nowhere and all of a sudden a
guy hits him over the head with a pipe.
Yeah, I hope nothing bad happens.
We need a diversion.
Trog, go distract them.
My God,!
Run!
Run to the end of it!
Well this couldn't get any worse.
I'm about to be eaten by a giant talking mouth!
Let me go, you damn dirty robots!
Trog, stop fooling around and get down here.
A surface rocket is approaching the station.
Activate the cannons.
I've been in a few scrapes
worse than this before.
What, what's going on?
Spider, spider!
Destroy them!
Gods of lya, hear my cries!
Mohana, now is not the time.
You know, you really gotta learn how to relax.
Brace for impact.
Okay Trog, give it up buddy.
Thanks.
Okay, and activate this puppy.
Here goes nothing.
You will all be destroyed!
I will make you feel pain!
Little help!
Man.
Hear me roar!
Die die die!
Arrrgh!
You haven't seen the last of me!
I will return!
Let's try this again.
Great Aton!
Perpetrator, infiltrator!
Colossus of the forbidden project!
Hear my cries!
No, no!
Aton!
And here goes something.
Stop hitting me!
All right guys, let's go, let's go!
I love all of you.
Quickly, to the transceiver!
I guess we have to be best friends now.
Yes, that monorail transporter over
there should be able to carry us all.
Well hot diggity banana hat!
This is a restricted area!
Return to the safety port immediately!
Useless!
Piece!
Of scrap!
The signal, signal, signal!
Auto, let's move up as soon
as there's a lull in the firing.
Don't tell me what to do, Strobo!
That's it, burn it, burn it all down!
Stand down, Mercenary.
Or face the consequences.
Put me down, put me down!
No!
Bombs away!
I hope you know how to work this thing.
Signal, signal, signal, signal!
Icarus, what are you waiting for?
Detonate the bomb!
Pluton!
Hey buddy!
Trog, talk to him!
Why are you looking at me like that?
Let me go!
It's really happening guys.
Yeah!
The computer is ready!
Okay, what's next?
Just go with it, man.
Wind it up, brothers, let's go!
Can you read this?
All right, I'm seeing an A.
Signal, signal, signal, signal, signal.
It might be G.
Try adding a G.
It looks like an A.
It's an A.
Signal, signal, signal.
Androids, against all odds you
have succeeded in your mission and
have brought about the convergence.
Tell me, what is the secret of the universe?
Hold on, I've got it right here.
Don't ever give up.
Target acquired, fire all cannons.