1
00:00:18,435 --> 00:00:20,228

2
00:00:22,105 --> 00:00:24,608

3
00:00:27,819 --> 00:00:31,156

4
00:00:34,284 --> 00:00:37,746

5
00:00:39,414 --> 00:00:42,834

6
00:00:44,086 --> 00:00:47,631

7
00:00:52,219 --> 00:00:54,304

8
00:00:59,017 --> 00:01:00,352
If you like to gamble

9
00:01:00,477 --> 00:01:02,145
I tell you, I'm your man

10
00:01:02,229 --> 00:01:03,689
You win some, lose some

11
00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:05,774
Is's all the same to me

12
00:01:11,947 --> 00:01:13,407
The pleasure is to play

13
00:01:13,490 --> 00:01:15,993
It makes no difference what you say

14
00:01:19,454 --> 00:01:21,331
I don't share your greed

15
00:01:21,415 --> 00:01:24,126
The only card I need is the Ace of Spades

16
00:01:24,251 --> 00:01:25,586
The Ace of Spades

17
00:01:29,548 --> 00:01:31,216
Playing for the high one

18
00:01:31,341 --> 00:01:32,676
Dancing with the devil

19
00:01:32,801 --> 00:01:34,678
Going with the flow

20
00:01:34,761 --> 00:01:36,846
Is's all a game to me

21
00:01:41,351 --> 00:01:43,103
(Song drowns out dialogue)

22
00:01:43,228 --> 00:01:44,771
Seven or eleven

23
00:01:44,897 --> 00:01:47,066
Snake eyes watching you

24
00:01:49,776 --> 00:01:51,236
Double up or quit

25
00:01:51,361 --> 00:01:53,655
Double stake or split

26
00:01:53,739 --> 00:01:56,784
The Ace of Spades, the Ace of Spades

27
00:02:03,540 --> 00:02:05,417
You know I'm born to lose

28
00:02:05,542 --> 00:02:07,419
And gambling's for fools

29
00:02:07,503 --> 00:02:09,088
But that's the way I like it, baby

30
00:02:09,171 --> 00:02:11,256
I don't want to live forever

31
00:02:15,761 --> 00:02:17,721
And don't forget the Joker

32
00:02:44,748 --> 00:02:46,500
Pushing up the ante...

33
00:02:46,625 --> 00:02:48,377
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

34
00:02:48,502 --> 00:02:49,753
Read 'em and weep

35
00:02:49,837 --> 00:02:51,714
The dead man's hand again

36
00:02:58,804 --> 00:03:00,472
I see it in your eyes

37
00:03:00,597 --> 00:03:02,265
Take one look and die

38
00:03:05,269 --> 00:03:06,729
The only thing you see

39
00:03:06,854 --> 00:03:08,522
You know it's gonna be

40
00:03:08,605 --> 00:03:12,359
The Ace of Spades, the Ace of Spades

41
00:03:16,655 --> 00:03:18,824
(Ketchup splutters)

42
00:03:34,173 --> 00:03:36,467
I'm going to the toilet.

43
00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:38,552
See you next Tuesday, then.

44
00:04:00,532 --> 00:04:03,869
Oh, it's a great feeling, Dave,
when your wife fuck s off and leaves you.

45
00:04:03,994 --> 00:04:05,537
Is's like a dream come true.

46
00:04:05,662 --> 00:04:07,747
My life now is one big fanny festival.

47
00:04:07,831 --> 00:04:11,585
I don't care if they're black, white,
yellow or purple. I'd shag anyone.

48
00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:13,879
Purple? Who's purple?

49
00:04:14,004 --> 00:04:15,881
Martians?

50
00:04:15,964 --> 00:04:17,966
- They're green!
- Are they?

51
00:04:18,050 --> 00:04:20,344
- Would you shag a Martian?
- Yeah. Would you?

52
00:04:20,469 --> 00:04:24,306
Might as well, I can't remember
t'last time I shagged a human being.

53
00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,350
SUPER PREACHERS: Good Karma

54
00:04:41,740 --> 00:04:45,702
Have you heard this -
this...fucking sandwich he's got? Tell him.

55
00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:48,497
Well, Linda used to put strawberry jam
on her twat.

56
00:04:48,622 --> 00:04:50,290
So I'd lick her out.

57
00:04:50,374 --> 00:04:53,419
- Blimey!
- Listen to this, Ferris.

58
00:04:53,502 --> 00:04:57,381
Now I'm just addicted to the taste.
Fanny juice and strawberries.

59
00:04:58,423 --> 00:05:02,177
He's got fucking strawberry jam
and fish paste sandwiches.

60
00:05:02,261 --> 00:05:04,138
Fucking hell, Tolly.

61
00:05:04,263 --> 00:05:06,432
Is's the nearest I can get to the flavour.

62
00:05:06,557 --> 00:05:08,851
Go on, have a bite. Is's fucking horrible.

63
00:05:08,934 --> 00:05:10,310
No, thank s.

64
00:05:10,394 --> 00:05:11,437
Try it.

65
00:05:11,562 --> 00:05:15,316
Tolly, I ain't eating a sandwich
that tastes like Linda's twat.

66
00:05:15,399 --> 00:05:17,902
It really doesn't, though.
And that's the problem.

67
00:05:18,026 --> 00:05:19,903
Can't quite get the flavour right.

68
00:05:19,987 --> 00:05:23,657
Erm...Kings Heath, you know, paint factory.

69
00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:28,119
That's them. And Lozells Road.
You know about that, don't you?

70
00:05:28,245 --> 00:05:29,496
You've already give 'em us.

71
00:05:29,580 --> 00:05:32,917
Have I?
Must've done. Sorry. It was a late night.

72
00:05:33,041 --> 00:05:35,335
Were you up all night watching porn channels?

73
00:05:35,419 --> 00:05:38,130
No, I went round to see Ruth at her flat.

74
00:05:38,255 --> 00:05:41,884
Drank a lot of wine, played chess,
talked about book s all night.

75
00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:43,761
You know what it's like.

76
00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:51,268
Anyway, you've er...
you've got the things, so er...

77
00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:53,478
Yeah.

78
00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:56,064
Good stuff.

79
00:05:57,232 --> 00:05:58,984
I went out this bird once, right.

80
00:05:59,109 --> 00:06:00,652
She used to lick my arse.

81
00:06:00,777 --> 00:06:03,571
Like, stick her tongue...right up my arse.

82
00:06:03,697 --> 00:06:06,200
Which is great,
but then she'd try and snog me.

83
00:06:06,283 --> 00:06:09,536
Which is like...fucking...
swings and roundabouts, that is.

84
00:06:09,620 --> 00:06:11,288
You can't fucking win.

85
00:06:11,413 --> 00:06:13,999
I'd hate to think what she has
in her sandwiches.

86
00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:18,795
Shit, probably.

87
00:06:38,524 --> 00:06:40,818
WOMAN:
How's my favourite son-in-law?

88
00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:45,197
You know what it's like, Joan,
when you've got all your fingers in a big pie.

89
00:06:47,991 --> 00:06:50,702
I can't find my bag.
Have you seen my bag?

90
00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:54,039
God, Joan, where's your jumper?

91
00:06:54,164 --> 00:06:56,041
In the kitchen.

92
00:06:57,918 --> 00:06:59,670
You look nice.

93
00:07:01,338 --> 00:07:04,049
Why don't you pull your trousers down?

94
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,428
Er...

95
00:07:08,554 --> 00:07:11,348
- Do you want me to help you?
- No, no. I can manage.

96
00:07:15,644 --> 00:07:17,813
That's a very lengthy type of sausage.

97
00:07:18,647 --> 00:07:20,315
Yeah.

98
00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:22,108
Don't get many complaints.

99
00:07:22,192 --> 00:07:24,486
You krow about my bad knees
and my arthesis.

100
00:07:24,611 --> 00:07:28,031
I'm on steroids and that.
Why don't I just plonk myself on the table?

101
00:07:29,199 --> 00:07:31,076
Yeah, that could work.

102
00:07:46,175 --> 00:07:48,052
(Sighs)

103
00:07:48,177 --> 00:07:50,971
My mother-in-law gave me a
blow job last night.

104
00:07:51,096 --> 00:07:54,016
Mine gave me a fishing rod once.

105
00:07:54,099 --> 00:07:57,978
At the end she wiped herself down
with toilet paper and put it in the ashtray.

106
00:07:58,061 --> 00:08:01,815
And then I was trying to have a fag
and that was the worst bit.

107
00:08:01,940 --> 00:08:05,485
You know, flicking the ash
onto the wet toilet paper.

108
00:08:07,154 --> 00:08:08,906
She's 50, you know, Joan.

109
00:08:09,031 --> 00:08:11,200
I've never seen varicose veins that big.

110
00:08:12,034 --> 00:08:13,827
Is's a tricky one, that, Ferris.

111
00:08:13,911 --> 00:08:17,164
You don't want to upset her
or you'll have nowhere to live.

112
00:08:17,247 --> 00:08:20,292
I can't afford to move out.
Is's going to keep on happening.

113
00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:24,338
Well, there's only way out of that situation.

114
00:08:24,463 --> 00:08:26,006
What's that?

115
00:08:26,131 --> 00:08:29,676
I don't know. I'm just saying.
There's probably only one way out of it.

116
00:08:29,760 --> 00:08:31,762
But I don't know what it is.

117
00:08:33,222 --> 00:08:34,974
I don't pay any rent.

118
00:08:35,098 --> 00:08:38,435
Free food, you know. No bills.
I'm laughing, really.

119
00:08:38,519 --> 00:08:41,230
But I can't go on living with
my mother-in-law for ever.

120
00:08:41,355 --> 00:08:43,023
If I was still married, then...

121
00:08:43,106 --> 00:08:46,443
Well, I am still married legally,
but...you know what I mean.

122
00:08:46,568 --> 00:08:48,737
At least you're getting blow jobs!

123
00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:51,239
Two years ago was last
before I had off Vicky

124
00:08:52,074 --> 00:08:53,742
I don't know what I've done wrong.

125
00:08:53,867 --> 00:08:55,827
I'm scared to go home these days.

126
00:08:55,953 --> 00:08:59,165
If I wasn't so lazy,
I'd become a workaholic.

127
00:09:12,511 --> 00:09:14,096
(Fruit machine bleeps)

128
00:09:17,015 --> 00:09:20,143
- Is's the potato men.
- Hiya, Phil.

129
00:09:20,227 --> 00:09:22,229
- How's it going?
- Not bad, not bad.

130
00:09:22,312 --> 00:09:24,189
Still working for Stan?

131
00:09:24,314 --> 00:09:25,440
No.

132
00:09:25,566 --> 00:09:27,735
There's a few things in the pipeline, though.

133
00:09:27,860 --> 00:09:31,906
And I'm thinking of setting up
a market stall selling broken biscuits.

134
00:09:32,030 --> 00:09:34,616
- Is's all happening, then.
- Yeah.

135
00:09:35,784 --> 00:09:37,744
So er...you still scared of wasps?

136
00:09:37,870 --> 00:09:40,247
He's frightened to death of wasps.

137
00:09:40,372 --> 00:09:43,584
I'm not scared of 'em.
If they fucking sting you, you know about it.

138
00:09:43,709 --> 00:09:47,546
I bought this candy floss once, right.
About ten fucking wasps attacked it.

139
00:09:47,671 --> 00:09:49,631
I'm like, "Fuck off, out of it."

140
00:09:50,465 --> 00:09:52,550
Just got all tangled up in it.

141
00:09:52,676 --> 00:09:54,636
Couldn't eat it.

142
00:09:54,761 --> 00:09:57,138
Fucking wasps - cunts.

143
00:09:57,264 --> 00:09:58,807
A wasp sting can kill you.

144
00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:00,392
- That's right.
- No, it's not.

145
00:10:00,475 --> 00:10:02,268
It is. Is's well-known, wasp sting.

146
00:10:02,352 --> 00:10:05,272
They can trigger, you know, death in a person.

147
00:10:05,397 --> 00:10:08,525
Yeah, but if you didn't have wasps,
you wouldn't have honey, so...

148
00:10:08,609 --> 00:10:10,402
No, that's bees. Bees make honey.

149
00:10:10,485 --> 00:10:13,822
Well, same thing.
Little fucking stripy jumpers on.

150
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,282
Fuck 'em!

151
00:10:15,407 --> 00:10:17,367
Bees make honey? Since when?

152
00:10:17,492 --> 00:10:19,452
Are you fucking serious?

153
00:10:19,578 --> 00:10:21,955
Bees and wasps, they invented honey.

154
00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:24,249
DAVE:
That's how they became famous

155
00:10:25,834 --> 00:10:28,754
Actually, it's just honey bees that make honey.

156
00:10:29,588 --> 00:10:33,759
Honey bees! On jars of honey,
there's always pictures of bees.

157
00:10:33,842 --> 00:10:35,927
FERRIS: Yeah I know I thought.

158
00:10:36,053 --> 00:10:38,847
I thought honey was just treacle with bees in it.

159
00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:40,307
You what?

160
00:10:40,432 --> 00:10:44,269
Don't they just mix a few bees up in the treacle?
Flavour it up a bit? I don't know.

161
00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:47,606
- Fucking hell, you don't eat bees.
- How do bees make honey, then?

162
00:10:48,857 --> 00:10:50,233
Phil.

163
00:10:55,656 --> 00:10:57,741
They eat flowers, I think.

164
00:10:57,824 --> 00:11:03,997
And something to do with eating the flowers
produces a honey effect when they spit it out.

165
00:11:04,081 --> 00:11:06,709
All insects make sweet substances.

166
00:11:06,792 --> 00:11:08,877
Bees make honey and ants make sugar.

167
00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:11,922
- Do they fuck!
- They fucking do, don't they, Phil?

168
00:11:12,756 --> 00:11:14,716
No.

169
00:11:16,593 --> 00:11:18,678
I thought they did.

170
00:11:25,269 --> 00:11:27,563
Why didn't you pick Katie up from my mum's?

171
00:11:27,646 --> 00:11:29,231
Was I meant to?

172
00:11:29,314 --> 00:11:30,982
You smell like a pub.

173
00:11:31,108 --> 00:11:34,737
Yeah, well, it just gets in your clothes,
the smoke and the beer smell.

174
00:11:35,696 --> 00:11:38,282
Did you put that flannel on the telly?

175
00:11:38,407 --> 00:11:42,036
I had a dirty face and erm...
I don't know how it got there.

176
00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:44,663
I'm running round after a child all day.

177
00:11:44,746 --> 00:11:46,831
I'm not running round after you as well.

178
00:11:46,957 --> 00:11:50,919
You're the one who wanted a kid.
And now you've got one, it's like it's my fault.

179
00:11:51,003 --> 00:11:53,923
I wanted a family. And this isn't a family.

180
00:11:54,047 --> 00:11:56,424
Because...you're a fucking idiot.

181
00:11:56,550 --> 00:11:58,927
Look, I don't even know what I'm arguing about.

182
00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:00,595
It's very basic Dave.

183
00:12:00,721 --> 00:12:02,890
Is's about being in the house now and again.

184
00:12:03,015 --> 00:12:05,518
Being a proper dad. What's wrong with you?

185
00:12:05,601 --> 00:12:08,020
You know, we're just going round in circles here.

186
00:12:08,103 --> 00:12:10,731
- You're not behaving like a human being.
- No I know.

187
00:12:10,814 --> 00:12:13,108
But who does? You've got to be realistic.

188
00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:15,402
You might think this is normal,
but I don't.

189
00:12:15,527 --> 00:12:18,238
And I'm not going to carry on living like this.

190
00:12:19,364 --> 00:12:21,575
If I was a monkey, a male monkey,

191
00:12:21,658 --> 00:12:24,161
I wouldn't even be here having this argument.

192
00:12:24,286 --> 00:12:26,038
I'd be down the pub, getting drunk...

193
00:12:26,163 --> 00:12:29,166
(Vacuum cleaner whirs)
- ..shagging loads of female monkeys.

194
00:12:29,291 --> 00:12:32,920
That's a natural state of affairs
for a male in any species.

195
00:12:33,045 --> 00:12:36,799
This situation here, it's a relatively modern one.

196
00:12:36,882 --> 00:12:39,301
And goes totally against nature.

197
00:12:40,219 --> 00:12:43,681
I'm telling you,
society's under a lot of strain right now.

198
00:12:43,764 --> 00:12:45,641
(Vacuum cleaner off)

199
00:12:45,766 --> 00:12:47,309
Dave?

200
00:12:47,434 --> 00:12:51,063
I can't go on any more with this.
You'll have to get out of here.

201
00:12:53,690 --> 00:12:57,110
Twelve months ago today, I met Ruth.
Is's our anniversary.

202
00:12:57,236 --> 00:12:58,988
She's probably forgot, but...

203
00:12:59,112 --> 00:13:02,324
I'm going to take her out
for a nice, expensive, slap-up meal.

204
00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:04,326
Champagne, you know.

205
00:13:04,409 --> 00:13:06,202
Starters. Puddings.

206
00:13:06,286 --> 00:13:09,623
Linda never remembered
our wedding anniversary. Or my birthday.

207
00:13:09,748 --> 00:13:11,500
I think it was the heroin.

208
00:13:11,625 --> 00:13:14,002
Is's hard to keep the romance in a relationship.

209
00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:16,504
Men like you and me, Tolly,
we're a dying breed.

210
00:13:16,630 --> 00:13:18,590
I used to put strawberry jam on her twat.

211
00:13:18,715 --> 00:13:22,761
Yeah. Dying breed, Tolly, dying breed.

212
00:13:40,612 --> 00:13:42,697
Ruth?

213
00:13:42,781 --> 00:13:44,658
- Oh.
- You look lovely. Your hair...

214
00:13:44,783 --> 00:13:46,326
Sorry, what did you want?

215
00:13:46,451 --> 00:13:48,203
I got you these.

216
00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:52,290
Don't take this the wrong way.
If you don't leave me alone,
I will call the police.

217
00:13:52,374 --> 00:13:53,417
Why?

218
00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:56,962
- For the last time Jeremy, go away!
- All couples have arguments.

219
00:13:57,087 --> 00:13:59,047
We are not a couple any more.

220
00:13:59,173 --> 00:14:03,427
How can you go from being...really liking me
to not wanting to see me? I don't get it.

221
00:14:03,552 --> 00:14:06,555
To be honest, I didn't like you
that much at any point, so...

222
00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:09,057
You've got a new boyfriend, haven't you?

223
00:14:09,183 --> 00:14:11,143
Just tell me.

224
00:14:12,394 --> 00:14:14,897
I'm going to walk away. Leave me alone.

225
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,441
- I'll always love you, Ruth.
- Fuck off!

226
00:14:18,567 --> 00:14:20,444
- Give us a ring.
- Fuck off, Jeremy!

227
00:14:20,527 --> 00:14:23,238
Any time. I like your outfit, by the way.

228
00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:25,448
It look s really nice on you.

229
00:14:25,532 --> 00:14:27,409
Women, eh?

230
00:14:27,534 --> 00:14:29,619
DELIBES: Flower Duet from Lakme

231
00:14:34,917 --> 00:14:38,045
JEREMY: Like a leaf falling from a tree
I fell for you.

232
00:14:38,170 --> 00:14:40,547
Gradual. Then suddenly.

233
00:14:40,672 --> 00:14:42,549
My insides melt.

234
00:14:42,633 --> 00:14:47,429
Your eyes, eyebrows, nose, mouth.
Everything leading to now.

235
00:14:47,554 --> 00:14:50,057
In the lake my shattered reflection.

236
00:14:50,140 --> 00:14:52,225
The mirror pieces of heartbreak

237
00:14:52,351 --> 00:14:54,311
Be still then passion.

238
00:14:55,062 --> 00:14:57,856
She has turned away like the winter.

239
00:14:57,981 --> 00:15:00,275
My inberrating love

240
00:15:00,359 --> 00:15:04,530
As it warms
the clear shafts of sunlight penetrate

241
00:15:04,655 --> 00:15:09,743
your moist fanny with my
stiff meaty love-rocket

242
00:15:10,494 --> 00:15:12,871
(Gasps) Fucking bitch!

243
00:15:16,124 --> 00:15:19,044
TOLLY: Like I say
you can stay here as long as you like.

244
00:15:19,127 --> 00:15:20,920
DAVE: Yeah cheers Tol

245
00:15:21,004 --> 00:15:23,924
Sad, you know, when you've been
with someone a long time.

246
00:15:24,049 --> 00:15:27,678
Well, she should have thought of that
before she nagged me to death.

247
00:15:27,803 --> 00:15:30,723
I'm a youg man. I'm only 31 , 32.

248
00:15:30,806 --> 00:15:32,599
I don't need it. You know what I mean?

249
00:15:32,683 --> 00:15:35,311
I still ain't got over, you know,
when Linda left me.

250
00:15:35,394 --> 00:15:37,187
You know what my first thought was?

251
00:15:37,271 --> 00:15:39,774
"Great, I can shag loads of birds now."

252
00:15:39,898 --> 00:15:42,192
But, like, my second thought was, "Who?"

253
00:15:43,110 --> 00:15:47,698
Who can I shag?
Who exactly am I going to be shagging?

254
00:15:47,823 --> 00:15:50,409
All kinds of thoughts go racing
through your mind.

255
00:15:50,534 --> 00:15:53,120
Linda was shagging
a mental patient behind my back.

256
00:15:53,245 --> 00:15:54,496
I remember, yeah.

257
00:15:54,580 --> 00:15:59,376
I tell you what, I'm going to be sliding down
a very steep learning curve.

258
00:15:59,501 --> 00:16:01,253
No doubt about it.

259
00:16:01,378 --> 00:16:03,463
But from now on, that's it.

260
00:16:03,547 --> 00:16:08,135
Is's just going to be fanny,
blow jobs, big tits and...

261
00:16:08,260 --> 00:16:10,012
you know, beer.

262
00:16:12,014 --> 00:16:13,974
That's the kind of lifestyle I want.

263
00:16:15,225 --> 00:16:17,227
- Sandwich?
- Cheers, mate.

264
00:16:19,813 --> 00:16:21,815
THE CORAL: Dreaming Of You

265
00:16:34,119 --> 00:16:37,456
What's up with my heart when it skips a beat?

266
00:16:37,539 --> 00:16:39,207
Skips a beat.

267
00:16:39,333 --> 00:16:42,461
Can't feel no pavement right under my feet

268
00:16:42,544 --> 00:16:44,129
Under my feet.

269
00:16:44,213 --> 00:16:46,507
Up in my lonely room
Wah-oooh

270
00:16:46,632 --> 00:16:48,926
When I'm dreaming of you

271
00:16:49,009 --> 00:16:52,262
Oh, what can I do?
Wah-oooh

272
00:16:52,346 --> 00:16:53,806
I still need you, but

273
00:16:53,931 --> 00:16:55,891
I don't want you now...

274
00:16:57,893 --> 00:16:59,853
All right, mate, is er...Poppy in?

275
00:16:59,978 --> 00:17:01,313
No, she's not.

276
00:17:01,438 --> 00:17:04,149
(Sighs) That's a shame. Is she all right, though?

277
00:17:04,233 --> 00:17:05,818
Who are you?

278
00:17:05,901 --> 00:17:07,486
Sorry, mate. I'm Dave.

279
00:17:07,569 --> 00:17:11,031
I'm an old friend of Poppy's.
What time are you expecting her back?

280
00:17:11,114 --> 00:17:12,574
Not till late. She's at work.

281
00:17:12,699 --> 00:17:14,659
Can you give her a message?

282
00:17:14,785 --> 00:17:15,828
What?

283
00:17:15,911 --> 00:17:19,039
- Have you got a pen and a bit of paper?
- Look, just tell me.

284
00:17:19,164 --> 00:17:22,167
- You must have some paper.
- Oh, Jesus Christ!

285
00:17:22,292 --> 00:17:24,377
This is important!

286
00:17:26,547 --> 00:17:29,050
All right, the message is from me, Dave.

287
00:17:29,174 --> 00:17:32,302
That's D-A-V-E.

288
00:17:32,386 --> 00:17:36,348
Just say, with respect to the threesome - yeah?
Just put threesome.

289
00:17:36,473 --> 00:17:40,018
With respect to the threesome, it's a thumbs-up.

290
00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:43,856
Is's just that she asked me
if I'd be interested but, you know,

291
00:17:43,981 --> 00:17:46,275
I was still with my wife at the time, so er...

292
00:17:46,358 --> 00:17:48,443
Mind you, I'm going back a bit now.

293
00:17:49,403 --> 00:17:51,488
I've not seen Poppy for a couple of years.

294
00:17:51,572 --> 00:17:53,365
You know, she could be...

295
00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:55,533
- You're not her husband, are you?
- No.

296
00:17:55,659 --> 00:17:57,953
- This is her mam's house, in't it?
- Yeah.

297
00:17:58,036 --> 00:18:00,455
- Who are you, then?
- I'm her brother.

298
00:18:00,539 --> 00:18:02,207
Ooh, nice one. Brother.

299
00:18:02,332 --> 00:18:04,084
How did that come about, then?

300
00:18:04,209 --> 00:18:05,961
What do you mean?

301
00:18:06,920 --> 00:18:09,923
Yeah, if you could pass the message on,
that would be great.

302
00:18:10,048 --> 00:18:11,508
I'll just write my number down.

303
00:18:14,636 --> 00:18:16,179
There you go.

304
00:18:16,305 --> 00:18:17,848
How's your mam, anyway?

305
00:18:17,973 --> 00:18:19,850
She died last year.

306
00:18:19,933 --> 00:18:21,935
What a shame.

307
00:18:22,019 --> 00:18:25,147
Anyway, get Poppy to give us a ring
as soon as she gets back

308
00:18:25,272 --> 00:18:27,357
cos I've just split up with my wife.

309
00:18:27,441 --> 00:18:29,026
Last night, actually.

310
00:18:29,109 --> 00:18:33,822
Is's taking me a while to adjust, so a threesome
with your sister would be superb right now.

311
00:18:36,617 --> 00:18:38,702
Tell her it's urgent!

312
00:18:39,745 --> 00:18:41,622
BUZZCOCKS: Orgasm Addict

313
00:18:41,747 --> 00:18:44,750
Well, you tried it just for once,
found it all right for kick s

314
00:18:44,875 --> 00:18:47,252
But now you found out
that it's a habit that stick s

315
00:18:47,377 --> 00:18:49,337
And you're an orgasm addict

316
00:18:49,463 --> 00:18:52,049
You're an orgasm addict

317
00:18:52,174 --> 00:18:54,885
Sneaking in the back door
with dirty magazines

318
00:18:54,885 --> 00:18:57,596
Now your mother wants to know
what all those stains on your jeans are.

319
00:18:57,679 --> 00:18:59,139
And you're an orgasm addict

320
00:18:59,890 --> 00:19:01,850
You're an orgasm addict

321
00:19:01,975 --> 00:19:05,520
Ah-ha, ah-ha, ah-ha

322
00:19:07,189 --> 00:19:10,609
Ah-ha, ah-ha, ah-ha

323
00:19:12,402 --> 00:19:14,779
You get in a heat, you get in a sulk

324
00:19:14,905 --> 00:19:17,491
But you still keep a-beating
your meat to pulp...

325
00:19:17,616 --> 00:19:20,327
Yeah? Wow. What else are you wearing?

326
00:19:21,370 --> 00:19:23,455
Oh, God! Really?

327
00:19:27,626 --> 00:19:29,795
What? What am I wearing?

328
00:19:29,920 --> 00:19:33,882
Erm...a brown jumper.
A pair of trousers I got off my dad.

329
00:19:33,966 --> 00:19:36,469
They didn't fit him.
He got them out the catalogue

330
00:19:36,593 --> 00:19:38,553
and didn't send them back, so I had them.

331
00:19:38,679 --> 00:19:42,308
Linda, my ex-wife,
she used to quite like me in these trousers.

332
00:19:42,432 --> 00:19:44,100
Yeah, she just pissed off one day.

333
00:19:44,184 --> 00:19:45,852
Never rung me or anything.

334
00:19:45,978 --> 00:19:48,772
I've heard she's been done
for shoplifting, which...

335
00:19:48,897 --> 00:19:51,483
Hello? Hello?

336
00:19:51,608 --> 00:19:55,153
Have you finished, Tolly?
You're putting me off my breakfast.

337
00:20:09,334 --> 00:20:11,419
Excuse me, mate.

338
00:20:12,254 --> 00:20:14,131
How much are your plastic twats?

339
00:20:14,214 --> 00:20:16,007
- Fifty quid.
- Right.

340
00:20:16,091 --> 00:20:19,136
What do you use to erm...
What do you put inside it?

341
00:20:20,262 --> 00:20:21,722
Your cock.

342
00:20:21,847 --> 00:20:23,724
No, I meant to make it all slippery.

343
00:20:23,807 --> 00:20:26,226
Do you put, like,
margarine in it or something?

344
00:20:26,310 --> 00:20:29,230
There's tubes of KY Jelly.
Next to the vibrators.

345
00:20:29,354 --> 00:20:31,731
Yeah, but it doesn't taste
of anything, does it?

346
00:20:31,857 --> 00:20:33,525
You're not supposed to eat it, mate.

347
00:20:33,609 --> 00:20:35,277
No, no.

348
00:20:35,402 --> 00:20:36,445
Obviously.

349
00:20:36,528 --> 00:20:38,613
But is there anything else?

350
00:20:38,739 --> 00:20:41,951
Is there anything that's got a more...
proper fanny flavour?

351
00:20:42,075 --> 00:20:43,410
Yeah. A proper fanny.

352
00:20:47,164 --> 00:20:50,000
ANSWERPHONE: Leave your message now
( Beep)

353
00:20:50,083 --> 00:20:53,003
All right guys. My name's Nigel Tolly

354
00:20:53,128 --> 00:20:54,463
My mates call me Tolly.

355
00:20:54,588 --> 00:20:56,965
I'm average, 26, divorced.

356
00:20:57,090 --> 00:20:59,050
I look er...OK. Normal.

357
00:20:59,176 --> 00:21:01,553
I haven't got a moustache, anything like that.

358
00:21:01,678 --> 00:21:06,349
I like takeaway meals, renting videos
and I used to have a motorbike.

359
00:21:06,475 --> 00:21:09,061
Sold it to a mate of mine. He didn't look after it.

360
00:21:09,186 --> 00:21:11,063
Still, that's another story.

361
00:21:11,146 --> 00:21:13,023
I have my own...apartment.

362
00:21:13,148 --> 00:21:16,151
With future fridge et cetera

363
00:21:16,276 --> 00:21:18,028
Gas central heating.

364
00:21:18,153 --> 00:21:20,947
I'm really looking for a girl
who enjoys dirty sex acts.

365
00:21:21,073 --> 00:21:22,825
Any size, any age, any colour.

366
00:21:22,950 --> 00:21:25,119
No sex-change people.
I must specify that.

367
00:21:25,244 --> 00:21:29,206
And I like putting jam on people.
I've got to get that across. Is's very important.

368
00:21:29,289 --> 00:21:31,708
So please send photos to my box number

369
00:21:31,792 --> 00:21:36,088
or leave a message if you want
strawberry jam put on your areas.

370
00:21:36,171 --> 00:21:39,007
I will, of course,
buy you a drink and a meal.

371
00:21:39,091 --> 00:21:42,136
That's about it, girls.
Get dialling now. OK.

372
00:21:51,728 --> 00:21:53,480
Three women at once.

373
00:21:53,605 --> 00:21:57,150
And I bet he's got a few cans of beer
in that fridge for later on.

374
00:21:57,234 --> 00:21:59,319
My cousin's been killed in a car crash.

375
00:21:59,444 --> 00:22:01,196
- Has he?
- Yeah.

376
00:22:05,492 --> 00:22:07,577
I won't have to pay that back now, will l?

377
00:22:07,661 --> 00:22:10,164
No, if somebody dies,
it's their fault, in't it?

378
00:22:10,289 --> 00:22:12,583
Yeah.
Shame for his wife and kid, and that,

379
00:22:12,666 --> 00:22:15,586
but for me personally...it's worked out all right.

380
00:22:16,628 --> 00:22:18,630
DAVE:
Here we are look.

381
00:22:18,714 --> 00:22:21,133
- Nice.
- All right, girls?

382
00:22:21,216 --> 00:22:23,510
Fuck off!

383
00:22:23,635 --> 00:22:25,929
THE SPECIALS: A Message To You, Rudy

384
00:22:26,013 --> 00:22:28,724
Oh, come on, Ferris.
Just get it over with.

385
00:22:28,849 --> 00:22:31,352
Tell him his dad's dead or
I'm going to be late.

386
00:22:32,269 --> 00:22:34,271
I can't do it, Dave.

387
00:22:34,354 --> 00:22:36,022
All right. Leave it to me.

388
00:22:36,148 --> 00:22:38,525
I'm pretty good at this sort of thing.

389
00:22:41,987 --> 00:22:44,781
Stop your messing around

390
00:22:46,575 --> 00:22:48,118
Better think of your future...

391
00:22:48,243 --> 00:22:49,995
Do you know your dad used to be alive?

392
00:22:51,872 --> 00:22:54,583
Well, he's not any more.

393
00:22:54,708 --> 00:22:57,294
Creating problems in town...

394
00:23:00,631 --> 00:23:02,091
Rudy...

395
00:23:02,216 --> 00:23:03,759
Where's Mummy?

396
00:23:04,718 --> 00:23:07,638
Good point. Where's his mum?

397
00:23:07,721 --> 00:23:09,306
She's in a coma.

398
00:23:09,389 --> 00:23:11,474
A message to you...

399
00:23:13,143 --> 00:23:14,728
Do you want an ice cream?

400
00:23:15,979 --> 00:23:17,939
Come on, then.

401
00:24:43,984 --> 00:24:45,527
VERDI: Brindisi from La Traviata

402
00:24:45,652 --> 00:24:47,404
Dear Ruth you cowbag

403
00:24:47,529 --> 00:24:50,323
I know you are enjoying this situation.

404
00:24:50,449 --> 00:24:53,160
Messing me about and getting
all this attention.

405
00:24:53,243 --> 00:24:56,705
I noticed you've now changed
all your telephone numbers

406
00:24:56,788 --> 00:25:00,959
your mobile, your home number
and your extension at work

407
00:25:01,084 --> 00:25:04,838
as well as your email addresses
and both fax numbers.

408
00:25:04,922 --> 00:25:08,384
When they ask you why
I can just imagine you saying.

409
00:25:08,467 --> 00:25:12,429
"There's this man who's obsessively
in love with me you know how it is."

410
00:25:12,554 --> 00:25:16,391
I bet you let everyone know about me
because it makes you look really good

411
00:25:16,517 --> 00:25:18,602
in demand Wanted by me!

412
00:25:24,316 --> 00:25:26,193
Well you'd better make the most of it.

413
00:25:26,318 --> 00:25:29,321
You've got the kind of face
that isn't going to age very well.

414
00:25:29,446 --> 00:25:32,032
Fat cheeks and piggy eyes

415
00:25:32,157 --> 00:25:34,117
in a couple of years you'll
be ringing me up.

416
00:25:34,243 --> 00:25:38,289
You'll be desperate and I'll say
"You had your chance darling but you blew it.

417
00:25:38,413 --> 00:25:40,373
Now go away and be ugly and fat.

418
00:25:40,499 --> 00:25:42,793
And honey"

419
00:25:45,379 --> 00:25:49,758
You'll keep this letter in a box as a souvenir
of the times when you could attract me!

420
00:25:49,883 --> 00:25:51,426
You know this is true.

421
00:25:51,552 --> 00:25:55,389
And that new boyfriend of yours
I know for a fact he's seeing somebody else.

422
00:25:55,514 --> 00:25:57,474
All the best Jeremy.

423
00:26:07,818 --> 00:26:13,115
RUTH: Just sniffs. Sniffs the grass. In a minute,
he'll see something he wants to play with.

424
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:14,908
Come on, baby.

425
00:26:20,122 --> 00:26:21,582
Yeah.

426
00:26:21,665 --> 00:26:23,667
- (Laughs)
- Yeah.

427
00:26:31,592 --> 00:26:33,260
(Dog bark s)

428
00:26:33,343 --> 00:26:35,554
Oi! Fuck off!

429
00:26:37,222 --> 00:26:39,307
Fuck off!

430
00:26:46,690 --> 00:26:47,858
(Dog bark s)

431
00:26:53,572 --> 00:26:54,948
RUTH: Bobby!

432
00:26:55,032 --> 00:26:57,034
BOYFRIEND: Bobby!

433
00:26:57,117 --> 00:26:58,160
Bobby!

434
00:26:58,994 --> 00:27:00,370
Bobby!

435
00:27:03,790 --> 00:27:08,795
(Evil chuckle) OK. I'm going to chop
your fucking head off, mister.

436
00:27:08,921 --> 00:27:12,466
Send you back in a fucking carrier bag.
See how she likes that.

437
00:27:13,592 --> 00:27:15,677
Don't move.

438
00:27:24,978 --> 00:27:26,521
There.

439
00:27:26,647 --> 00:27:28,732
How do you like this situation, then, eh?

440
00:27:28,815 --> 00:27:31,109
You scared? You fucking scared? Are you?

441
00:27:32,486 --> 00:27:34,154
Right.

442
00:27:43,413 --> 00:27:45,916
This was a really stupid thing to do.

443
00:27:49,253 --> 00:27:51,338
SUPER PREACHERS: I Feel Happy

444
00:28:01,056 --> 00:28:02,391
All right.

445
00:28:02,516 --> 00:28:05,936
Put your hands up if you're going to shag
two women this afternoon.

446
00:28:06,061 --> 00:28:07,187
FERRIS:
Are you?

447
00:28:07,312 --> 00:28:09,898
Just got a message from Poppy.
Can't believe it.

448
00:28:10,023 --> 00:28:11,983
I'm having a threesome today.

449
00:28:12,109 --> 00:28:13,235
Can I come?

450
00:28:13,360 --> 00:28:15,112
- No
- Wouldn't be a threesome then.

451
00:28:15,237 --> 00:28:16,572
No, but...

452
00:28:16,697 --> 00:28:18,449
- Congratulations, mate.
- Cheers.

453
00:28:18,574 --> 00:28:21,077
- Yeah, nice one, Dave.
- Cheers, Tol.

454
00:28:22,744 --> 00:28:24,704
I can't believe it. A threesome!

455
00:28:25,747 --> 00:28:27,540
FERRIS:
You deserve it mate.

456
00:28:27,624 --> 00:28:29,626
Yeah, I do, don't I?

457
00:28:34,631 --> 00:28:37,134
DAVE: They want to sort
the parking out round here.

458
00:28:37,217 --> 00:28:40,554
Is's hopeless.
You should have permit parking or something.

459
00:28:40,679 --> 00:28:42,973
Go in there with Kevin.
I'll only be a minute.

460
00:28:43,056 --> 00:28:44,724
Right.

461
00:28:44,850 --> 00:28:46,602
Kevin? Who's Kevin?

462
00:28:46,727 --> 00:28:49,521
Is's a threesome, Dave.
You need three people.

463
00:28:49,646 --> 00:28:52,232
Yeah, but I thought it would be me
and two women.

464
00:28:52,357 --> 00:28:54,442
Yeah, I bet you did.

465
00:29:02,367 --> 00:29:04,327
- All right, mate?
- All right.

466
00:29:05,913 --> 00:29:07,456
Where did you park?

467
00:29:08,624 --> 00:29:10,709
Actually, I... I got the bus.

468
00:29:10,792 --> 00:29:13,628
My car's off the road at the minute.
I had er...a bump.

469
00:29:13,712 --> 00:29:15,923
I've been driving round for ages.

470
00:29:17,049 --> 00:29:20,386
- I haven't kept you waiting, have I?
- No. I got here early.

471
00:29:20,511 --> 00:29:23,014
You know,
I like to soak up the atmosphere.

472
00:29:23,096 --> 00:29:24,889
(Dogs bark outside)

473
00:29:24,973 --> 00:29:26,975
Turn off the mobile.

474
00:29:27,059 --> 00:29:29,562
Yeah. How do they work, these things?

475
00:29:29,686 --> 00:29:31,646
I wouldn't want to hazard a guess.

476
00:29:31,772 --> 00:29:33,440
Is's like space age.

477
00:29:34,149 --> 00:29:38,528
Is's all them aerials. You see 'em on
the motorway. Is's like a network. Like the radio.

478
00:29:38,654 --> 00:29:40,614
Yeah, but the radio - how does that work?

479
00:29:40,739 --> 00:29:43,116
How does music travel through the air

480
00:29:43,242 --> 00:29:45,953
then get into the radio
and come back out again?

481
00:29:46,036 --> 00:29:49,164
I-I-I'd imagine it's the same system
as the phones.

482
00:29:50,207 --> 00:29:51,667
Could be, yeah.

483
00:29:51,792 --> 00:29:54,503
I saw that Adrian Chiles in the pub
and I asked him about it.

484
00:29:54,586 --> 00:29:57,005
He didn't have a clue,
and he's on the BBC.

485
00:29:57,089 --> 00:30:00,009
Lives near Redditch. Lovely house.

486
00:30:00,133 --> 00:30:02,010
He's quite a nice bloke, actually.

487
00:30:02,094 --> 00:30:04,096
Told us that he's loaded, like.

488
00:30:04,179 --> 00:30:07,307
He said he doesn't get out of bed
for less than two grand.

489
00:30:07,432 --> 00:30:10,018
He just stays in bed if no-one pays him?

490
00:30:10,853 --> 00:30:12,229
Yeah. Think so.

491
00:30:12,312 --> 00:30:14,606
His pyjamas must stink.

492
00:30:14,731 --> 00:30:17,317
Actually, there was a funny smell in that pub.

493
00:30:23,156 --> 00:30:25,241
(Bed thuds)

494
00:30:26,201 --> 00:30:28,370
I reckon this bed's seen a bit of action.

495
00:30:28,495 --> 00:30:30,580
All the joints are loose.

496
00:30:30,664 --> 00:30:32,666
You need an Allen key.

497
00:30:32,749 --> 00:30:35,252
Tighten 'em up, and it'll be right as rain.

498
00:30:35,377 --> 00:30:36,920
POPPY:
Hello boys!

499
00:30:38,589 --> 00:30:40,800
You haven't got an Allen key, have you?

500
00:30:40,883 --> 00:30:43,803
I've got vibrators, dildos,

501
00:30:43,927 --> 00:30:45,470
handcuffs...

502
00:30:45,596 --> 00:30:48,099
Is's just...we really need an Allen key.

503
00:30:49,975 --> 00:30:51,226
What for?

504
00:30:51,310 --> 00:30:53,813
- Well...
- Dave! Don't worry about it.

505
00:30:53,937 --> 00:30:55,272
Let's...

506
00:30:55,397 --> 00:30:57,566
DAVE:
Right yeah!

507
00:30:57,691 --> 00:30:59,651
- No problem.
- Fancy a spit roast?

508
00:30:59,776 --> 00:31:01,444
Yeah! I do.

509
00:31:01,528 --> 00:31:03,613
I've only had a sandwich for my dinner.

510
00:31:05,282 --> 00:31:07,785
Everybody was kung fu fighting

511
00:31:09,244 --> 00:31:12,789
Those cats were fast as lightning

512
00:31:13,957 --> 00:31:17,377
In fact, it was a little bit frightening

513
00:31:18,754 --> 00:31:22,174
But they fought with expert timing

514
00:31:23,967 --> 00:31:26,678
There were funky Chinamen

515
00:31:26,762 --> 00:31:28,764
From funky Chinatown

516
00:31:28,847 --> 00:31:31,266
They were chopping them up

517
00:31:31,350 --> 00:31:33,644
They were chopping them down

518
00:31:33,769 --> 00:31:35,729
Is's an ancient Chinese art

519
00:31:35,854 --> 00:31:38,231
And everybody knew their part

520
00:31:38,357 --> 00:31:40,651
From a feint into a slip

521
00:31:40,734 --> 00:31:42,611
And a kicking from the hip

522
00:31:42,736 --> 00:31:45,239
Everybody was kung fu fighting...

523
00:31:45,322 --> 00:31:47,950
I like cauliflower and I like cheese...

524
00:31:49,076 --> 00:31:50,953
..but I don't like cauliflower cheese.

525
00:31:51,078 --> 00:31:54,498
Same with me. I like apples and I like toffee
but I don't like toffee apples.

526
00:31:54,623 --> 00:31:58,252
But then...I don't like actual tomatoes,

527
00:31:58,377 --> 00:32:00,462
but I love tomato sauce.

528
00:32:00,546 --> 00:32:01,922
Is's just weird.

529
00:32:02,005 --> 00:32:04,216
Are you two going to shut up, or what?

530
00:32:04,299 --> 00:32:05,884
Sorry, love.

531
00:32:05,968 --> 00:32:07,970
- Is's Dave.
- Cheers, mate.

532
00:32:08,053 --> 00:32:10,889
I don't care who it is,
just shut up and concentrate.

533
00:32:10,973 --> 00:32:12,224
I'm doing all the work here.

534
00:32:12,349 --> 00:32:14,309
Let's just get it finished.

535
00:32:14,434 --> 00:32:18,188
I can't "finish" just like that.
I need some stimulation.

536
00:32:18,272 --> 00:32:20,483
Come on, Dave. Let's step it up a gear.

537
00:32:20,566 --> 00:32:22,234
Have you got any porn mags?

538
00:32:22,359 --> 00:32:24,528
Just put some elbow grease into it.

539
00:32:27,990 --> 00:32:29,950
(Bed creak s)

540
00:32:30,909 --> 00:32:32,661
DAVE:
Aye! There you go!

541
00:32:53,932 --> 00:32:55,725
(Dogs bark in distance)

542
00:32:59,062 --> 00:33:01,439
JOAN: Ferris is that you?
- Yeah.

543
00:33:02,274 --> 00:33:03,734
Come here a minute.

544
00:33:03,859 --> 00:33:05,319
Erm...

545
00:33:05,402 --> 00:33:07,070
Look at this

546
00:33:07,196 --> 00:33:08,948
- What?
- I want to show you something.

547
00:33:09,072 --> 00:33:11,032
- What is it?
- I won't bite you!

548
00:33:11,158 --> 00:33:12,701
I got my photos back.

549
00:33:12,826 --> 00:33:14,911
Oh. Oh, right.

550
00:33:15,537 --> 00:33:17,289
What do you think of that?

551
00:33:17,414 --> 00:33:20,208
What is it, the moon?
Look s like the surface of the moon.

552
00:33:20,334 --> 00:33:23,337
How can it be the moon?
I haven't been to the moon, have l?

553
00:33:23,462 --> 00:33:25,547
- I don't know.
- Is's my arse.

554
00:33:26,590 --> 00:33:29,384
- Oh, right.
- I got one of them throwaway cameras.

555
00:33:29,510 --> 00:33:31,470
Here y'are. Guess what that is.

556
00:33:32,846 --> 00:33:35,849
- Oh, Jesus.
- Might get that one enlarged.

557
00:33:35,974 --> 00:33:37,726
Listen, Joan, I've got to...

558
00:33:37,851 --> 00:33:39,936
Don't you want to take your trousers down?

559
00:33:40,020 --> 00:33:41,480
- No.
- Why not?

560
00:33:41,605 --> 00:33:42,940
Is's cold.

561
00:33:43,065 --> 00:33:46,694
I'll put the fire on. There's a hell
of a draught coming from this door.

562
00:33:48,695 --> 00:33:50,363
I've got a new bra.

563
00:33:50,447 --> 00:33:53,575
Look, Joan, the thing is,
I-I like living here and everything,

564
00:33:53,700 --> 00:33:55,243
it's just that I don't want to...

565
00:34:00,040 --> 00:34:02,042
That is a nice bra.

566
00:34:03,168 --> 00:34:05,253
Shall we strangle the hamster?

567
00:34:05,379 --> 00:34:07,339
All right. Just once more, then.

568
00:34:08,173 --> 00:34:10,467
SUPER PREACHERS: I Feel Happy

569
00:34:11,426 --> 00:34:13,386
A-ha-ha
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

570
00:34:14,012 --> 00:34:16,014
A-ha-ha
Yeah, yeah, yeah

571
00:34:16,098 --> 00:34:18,183
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

572
00:34:19,226 --> 00:34:22,771
I don't know if we can get higher

573
00:34:23,730 --> 00:34:27,275
But tell me why you're dressed in black

574
00:34:28,735 --> 00:34:32,572
Life is short and full of flowers

575
00:34:33,740 --> 00:34:37,160
If you know you'll reach the sky

576
00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:40,080
I feel happy

577
00:34:40,205 --> 00:34:42,290
Yeah, yeah, yeah

578
00:34:42,374 --> 00:34:44,793
I feel happy

579
00:34:45,627 --> 00:34:47,587
Yeah, yeah, yeah

580
00:34:47,713 --> 00:34:49,673
- All right, mate?
- All right.

581
00:34:49,798 --> 00:34:51,758
(Laughs) What happened here?

582
00:34:51,884 --> 00:34:54,887
- Crazy paving.
- This ain't crazy paving, Ferris.

583
00:34:55,012 --> 00:34:56,972
This is just shit.

584
00:34:57,097 --> 00:34:59,808
I was trying to...you know.

585
00:35:01,059 --> 00:35:04,271
You haven't got, like, any artistic
vision here, have you?

586
00:35:04,396 --> 00:35:06,773
Is's just a random fucking big mess.

587
00:35:06,899 --> 00:35:09,902
Is's crazy paving.
You just bung slabs down on the floor.

588
00:35:10,027 --> 00:35:13,030
No. I think you've focused too much
on the crazy aspect

589
00:35:13,155 --> 00:35:15,115
and not enough on the paving side of it.

590
00:35:15,240 --> 00:35:17,743
Have you come round
to have a go at my crazy paving?

591
00:35:17,826 --> 00:35:19,703
- No, but...
- What do you want, then?

592
00:35:19,828 --> 00:35:21,079
Nothing.

593
00:35:21,163 --> 00:35:23,165
You're standing on my string.

594
00:35:23,999 --> 00:35:27,628
What type of concrete are you using?
Cos you know there's different types.

595
00:35:27,753 --> 00:35:29,505
You're getting on my nerves.

596
00:35:29,630 --> 00:35:32,424
I'm just saying,
there's different types of concrete!

597
00:35:32,549 --> 00:35:34,843
Use the wrong one and...you're fucked!

598
00:35:34,927 --> 00:35:37,221
Is's just ordinary concrete.

599
00:35:38,805 --> 00:35:40,682
Tolly is driving me round the twist.

600
00:35:41,517 --> 00:35:44,520
He never stops wanking.
I just had to get out of there.

601
00:35:44,645 --> 00:35:46,730
You want to try living here, with Joan.

602
00:35:46,813 --> 00:35:49,941
24 hours a day,
it's either blow jobs or crazy paving.

603
00:35:50,776 --> 00:35:53,821
Look at us.
Half eleven on a Saturday morning.

604
00:35:53,904 --> 00:35:55,906
It isn't right. We're youg blokes.

605
00:35:56,949 --> 00:36:00,995
We shouldn't be stood here like this.
We should be living lives to the full.

606
00:36:01,119 --> 00:36:03,079
We should be down the pub.

607
00:36:07,251 --> 00:36:10,588
Threesomes are a great innovation,
no question of that.

608
00:36:10,712 --> 00:36:13,506
Is's the other bloke being there that,
you know...

609
00:36:14,550 --> 00:36:18,429
I'd rather it were me and two women,
but that's more difficult to organise.

610
00:36:18,512 --> 00:36:22,474
Yeah, women get a bit narked
when you try and involve another bird.

611
00:36:22,599 --> 00:36:24,559
They take umbrage.

612
00:36:25,394 --> 00:36:28,230
I don't want to sound like
a complete poof, but...

613
00:36:28,313 --> 00:36:30,398
I used to like talking to my wife.

614
00:36:32,067 --> 00:36:33,318
Did you?

615
00:36:33,443 --> 00:36:34,986
I know it's weird,

616
00:36:35,112 --> 00:36:38,240
but her little face chatting away
and then you say something.

617
00:36:38,323 --> 00:36:41,368
You know, like...
pretending that you're listening.

618
00:36:43,036 --> 00:36:45,830
Is's nice when a woman looks
at you like that, you know.

619
00:36:45,956 --> 00:36:47,499
Appreciative.

620
00:36:48,250 --> 00:36:49,918
That's what I'm going to miss.

621
00:36:50,002 --> 00:36:51,670
Are you all right, mate?

622
00:36:51,795 --> 00:36:55,966
Yeah, yeah. I'm just at that stage
in my life where I just feel, you know...

623
00:36:56,049 --> 00:36:58,552
really...hungry.

624
00:37:08,896 --> 00:37:11,690
OPERATOR:
Please enter your four-digit number.

625
00:37:12,941 --> 00:37:15,652
Welcome to the Sexy Singles call exchange.

626
00:37:15,777 --> 00:37:18,363
Your personal fun box is empty.

627
00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:23,285
TOLLY:
I want one of them golden showers.

628
00:37:23,368 --> 00:37:25,036
I want you to like piss on me,

629
00:37:25,162 --> 00:37:26,830
then I want to do a 69

630
00:37:26,914 --> 00:37:31,419
but first I want to put some of this strawberry jam
on your twat so I can lick it off.

631
00:37:31,502 --> 00:37:35,047
Then I want another girl with a strap-on dildo
shaggin' me up the arse

632
00:37:35,172 --> 00:37:38,175
while you're doing yourself with a vibrator

633
00:37:38,300 --> 00:37:41,303
and then you both toss me off.
How much will that be?

634
00:37:41,428 --> 00:37:42,971
Well, let's see.

635
00:37:43,096 --> 00:37:45,056
Where's my price list?

636
00:37:45,182 --> 00:37:47,351
Customer providing own jam

637
00:37:48,519 --> 00:37:50,062
..double toss off...

638
00:37:50,187 --> 00:37:51,522
plus VAT...

639
00:37:51,647 --> 00:37:53,107
Let's call it 200.

640
00:37:54,983 --> 00:37:57,068
- That's cheap
- Bloody hell.

641
00:37:58,320 --> 00:37:59,655
How much did you want to spend?

642
00:38:00,822 --> 00:38:02,282
What do you get for 20 quid?

643
00:38:02,366 --> 00:38:04,577
I'll show you my tits.

644
00:38:04,660 --> 00:38:07,997
That's 20 quid?
I can get 13 pints of beer for 20 quid.

645
00:38:08,121 --> 00:38:09,998
- Go on, then.
- All right, then, I will.

646
00:38:10,082 --> 00:38:13,210
And I'll toss myself off, for free.
Thank you very much.

647
00:38:13,335 --> 00:38:15,420
Don't forget your jam.

648
00:38:15,504 --> 00:38:17,089
Oh, yeah.

649
00:38:17,172 --> 00:38:18,757
Thank s, love.

650
00:38:19,675 --> 00:38:21,468
Can I see your arse for a fiver?

651
00:38:21,552 --> 00:38:23,637
- No.
- All right. Ta-ra, then, love.

652
00:38:23,762 --> 00:38:25,847
Ta-ra a bit.

653
00:38:33,647 --> 00:38:35,232
You coming for a pint?

654
00:38:35,315 --> 00:38:37,734
Can't, mate.
I'm going down the hospital.

655
00:38:37,818 --> 00:38:39,820
I'm taking Matthew to see his mum.

656
00:38:39,903 --> 00:38:43,156
- The one in the coma with the big tits?
- Yep, that's her.

657
00:38:44,199 --> 00:38:46,076
I bet there's some cracking nurses there.

658
00:38:46,159 --> 00:38:48,161
There is, mate. That's why I'm going.

659
00:38:48,245 --> 00:38:49,913
You know what nurses are like.

660
00:38:50,038 --> 00:38:53,166
Buy 'em a drink and some chips
and they'll do anything.

661
00:39:03,051 --> 00:39:05,136
She's much thinner than before.

662
00:39:06,096 --> 00:39:07,848
I don't think they eat much in a coma.

663
00:39:07,973 --> 00:39:09,516
They don't eat anything, do they?

664
00:39:09,641 --> 00:39:12,227
I thought it was, like,
astronaut food down a pipe.

665
00:39:12,352 --> 00:39:14,437
Yeah, that's it. That's it, I think.

666
00:39:14,938 --> 00:39:17,441
- You reckon they're quite big?
- Oh, yeah.

667
00:39:20,485 --> 00:39:22,445
DAVE: Not bad.
TOLLY: Nice.

668
00:39:28,285 --> 00:39:29,953
I need the toilet.

669
00:39:30,078 --> 00:39:31,830
What do you want? Number 1 or number 2?

670
00:39:31,955 --> 00:39:34,040
Number 3.

671
00:39:34,958 --> 00:39:36,126
Come on, Matthew.

672
00:39:36,210 --> 00:39:37,878
I'll take him to get some sweets.

673
00:39:38,003 --> 00:39:39,338
All right, mate.

674
00:40:05,322 --> 00:40:07,407
(Clink of crockery )

675
00:40:11,870 --> 00:40:13,747
- All right, love?
- Yeah, thanks. You?

676
00:40:13,872 --> 00:40:15,624
You remember Ferris, don't you, Mum?

677
00:40:15,749 --> 00:40:18,460
- Who?
- Ferris. Julie's husband. The wedding.

678
00:40:18,544 --> 00:40:20,629
Hello, Rose. How are you doing?

679
00:40:20,754 --> 00:40:23,048
(Horn beeps)
- Your taxi's here, Mum.

680
00:40:23,131 --> 00:40:26,051
Ferris. Oh, yes. Ferris.

681
00:40:26,885 --> 00:40:29,179
Got everything?
Have you got your stick?

682
00:40:30,430 --> 00:40:33,767
Joan says you've got a big cock.

683
00:40:33,892 --> 00:40:37,020
- Mum!
- What?

684
00:40:37,104 --> 00:40:38,272
Show it to her, Ferris.

685
00:40:39,398 --> 00:40:40,983
- What?
- Show her your thing.

686
00:40:41,066 --> 00:40:42,025
No!

687
00:40:42,109 --> 00:40:45,863
Ferris! She doesn't get out much,
she's practically bedridden.

688
00:40:45,988 --> 00:40:47,531
Oh, come on, Ferris.

689
00:40:47,656 --> 00:40:50,033
- Joan!
- Don't be such a spoilsport, Ferris.

690
00:40:50,158 --> 00:40:53,703
You've had a lot of generosity from
this family, living here rent-free.

691
00:40:53,787 --> 00:40:55,580
I don't ask for much in return.

692
00:41:00,586 --> 00:41:01,712
Well, hurry up.

693
00:41:06,216 --> 00:41:07,342
Wow!

694
00:41:07,467 --> 00:41:08,593
I told you.

695
00:41:08,719 --> 00:41:10,888
When it's stiff it's like a rolling pin.

696
00:41:11,638 --> 00:41:14,224
- Can I touch it?
- Yeah, go on, have a feel.

697
00:41:17,269 --> 00:41:19,354
Ohhh!

698
00:41:19,438 --> 00:41:22,358
If I was 50 years youger...

699
00:41:22,482 --> 00:41:24,567
- Put it in your mouth.
- Joan!

700
00:41:25,611 --> 00:41:27,905
I can't get down there with my back.

701
00:41:27,988 --> 00:41:29,865
Stand on a chair, Ferris.

702
00:41:29,990 --> 00:41:31,950
I'm not standing on a chair.

703
00:41:32,075 --> 00:41:33,535
MAN: Taxi for Rose

704
00:41:33,619 --> 00:41:35,412
(Zips up )
JOAN: Just coming love.

705
00:41:35,495 --> 00:41:37,789
ROSE: Has he gone to get a chair?
- No he's.

706
00:41:37,915 --> 00:41:41,460
Let's get you home.
They'll be wondering where you've got to.

707
00:41:41,543 --> 00:41:44,046
ROSE:
It's shepherd's pie tonight.

708
00:41:44,171 --> 00:41:46,256
JOAN:
Ooh lucky you!

709
00:41:52,513 --> 00:41:54,473
You can't stay here long.

710
00:41:54,598 --> 00:41:56,975
No, I know.
Is's only for a couple of nights.

711
00:41:57,100 --> 00:41:58,852
I was thinking of buying my own place,

712
00:41:58,977 --> 00:42:03,440
but if I just move them jars of gherkins
out the way, I could sleep on that shelf.

713
00:42:03,565 --> 00:42:06,068
Well, if I'm going to do you a favour,

714
00:42:06,151 --> 00:42:08,445
there might be a favour you can do for me.

715
00:42:09,279 --> 00:42:11,281
All right, then, yeah. No problem.

716
00:42:11,573 --> 00:42:13,867
Mop that floor, you bitch.

717
00:42:16,078 --> 00:42:18,581
I feel like a right cunt doing this.

718
00:42:18,664 --> 00:42:20,749
Keep going. Keep going!

719
00:42:20,874 --> 00:42:23,251
DEXY'S MIDNIGHT RUNNERS:
One Way Love

720
00:42:23,377 --> 00:42:25,254
(Girl grunts)

721
00:42:25,337 --> 00:42:27,214
That's pretty clean now.

722
00:42:27,339 --> 00:42:28,799
Go and find

723
00:42:28,882 --> 00:42:30,342
Oh!

724
00:42:31,301 --> 00:42:33,261
The kind of girl

725
00:42:34,429 --> 00:42:37,641
Who think s you're the only

726
00:42:38,475 --> 00:42:40,560
Guy in the world

727
00:42:42,437 --> 00:42:44,439
No more half kisses

728
00:42:45,899 --> 00:42:47,859
That's bad enough

729
00:42:50,904 --> 00:42:52,239
No more teardrops

730
00:42:52,364 --> 00:42:54,741
No more one-way love

731
00:42:55,576 --> 00:42:57,369
One-way love

732
00:42:59,663 --> 00:43:01,540
Is's harder for someone

733
00:43:03,625 --> 00:43:05,710
Who likes to love fast

734
00:43:07,379 --> 00:43:09,756
You know that kind of love

735
00:43:10,716 --> 00:43:12,676
Will never last

736
00:43:14,136 --> 00:43:17,056
If she's fast and furious

737
00:43:18,223 --> 00:43:20,392
That can be rough

738
00:43:23,312 --> 00:43:27,066
You'll never have one-way love

739
00:43:27,816 --> 00:43:28,942
One-way love...

740
00:43:29,484 --> 00:43:31,236
MICHAEL HOLLIDAY: Starry-eyed

741
00:43:38,243 --> 00:43:41,872
Why am I so starry-eyed?

742
00:43:41,997 --> 00:43:45,334
Do us your trick, Bobby. Go on. (Laughs)

743
00:43:45,417 --> 00:43:47,294
Clever boy. Go on, do us another one.

744
00:43:47,419 --> 00:43:49,379
( Laughs)

745
00:43:49,505 --> 00:43:51,048
Where'd you learn to do that?

746
00:43:51,173 --> 00:43:54,093
I love you Bobby
You're just such a smashing little dog.

747
00:43:54,176 --> 00:43:56,261
I'm sorry I tried to kill you.

748
00:43:56,386 --> 00:43:57,637
I wouldn't do it now.

749
00:43:57,721 --> 00:44:02,434
I just really want to...you know, go to the park
with you and spend all my time with you.

750
00:44:02,518 --> 00:44:04,311
I love you, Bobby.

751
00:44:04,394 --> 00:44:07,522
You're just a fantastic little dog, aren't you?
Bobby?

752
00:44:07,648 --> 00:44:09,817
Bobby! Bobby, come back.

753
00:44:09,942 --> 00:44:12,945
Bobby, where are you going? Bobby!

754
00:44:13,779 --> 00:44:17,950
When we touch I hear angels sing
Starry-eyed

755
00:44:18,075 --> 00:44:21,412
When we kiss I hear wedding bells ring...

756
00:44:21,495 --> 00:44:23,288
This is Bobby. Say hello.

757
00:44:23,372 --> 00:44:24,957
All right, mate?

758
00:44:25,791 --> 00:44:28,711
- You know what you get from a dog?
- Dog shit.

759
00:44:28,794 --> 00:44:30,045
Unconditional love.

760
00:44:30,170 --> 00:44:31,838
Is it yours?

761
00:44:32,756 --> 00:44:34,216
Actually, it's Ruth's.

762
00:44:34,341 --> 00:44:36,927
She's away. She's in...Switzerland.

763
00:44:37,052 --> 00:44:39,638
So I'm looking after little Bobby.

764
00:44:39,763 --> 00:44:42,140
Well, don't, you know, while she's away.

765
00:44:42,266 --> 00:44:44,435
Don't start shagging it, cos she'll find out.

766
00:44:44,560 --> 00:44:46,228
They always find out.

767
00:44:46,311 --> 00:44:50,273
I know why I'm starry-eyed

768
00:44:50,399 --> 00:44:54,028
Starry-eyed and mystified

769
00:44:54,152 --> 00:44:57,906
All my dreams are coming true

770
00:44:58,824 --> 00:45:04,038
Just because I'm so in love with you

771
00:45:06,748 --> 00:45:09,376
Oh, hello! What's his name?

772
00:45:09,459 --> 00:45:11,753
Er, Bobby. Like Bobby Dazzler.

773
00:45:11,879 --> 00:45:13,839
Aw.

774
00:45:13,964 --> 00:45:16,675
Say hello, Bobby. Say hello to erm...

775
00:45:16,758 --> 00:45:18,843
I'm Shelley. This is Crystal.

776
00:45:18,969 --> 00:45:20,304
Hello, Crystal.

777
00:45:20,429 --> 00:45:23,140
(Dogs pant and whine)
- Don't do that, Crystal.

778
00:45:23,223 --> 00:45:25,016
- Bobby, stop it!
- Crystal, stop it!

779
00:45:25,100 --> 00:45:26,268
Bobby, stop it!

780
00:45:26,351 --> 00:45:29,479
I lived in...Africa for a while.

781
00:45:30,522 --> 00:45:33,984
Out there you soon learn to respect
wild animals, you know.

782
00:45:34,067 --> 00:45:36,486
Lions, tigers,

783
00:45:36,570 --> 00:45:38,238
hippos.

784
00:45:38,363 --> 00:45:40,115
Whereabouts in Africa were you?

785
00:45:41,283 --> 00:45:43,452
The er...safari district.

786
00:45:43,577 --> 00:45:44,828
Right. Yeah.

787
00:45:45,662 --> 00:45:47,330
I'd love to go on a safari.

788
00:45:47,414 --> 00:45:49,291
It was Kenya, where I was.

789
00:45:49,416 --> 00:45:52,753
You'd love it there.
Is's like solid jungle, you know.

790
00:45:52,836 --> 00:45:56,715
You open your curtains in the morning
and there's giraffes everywhere.

791
00:45:56,798 --> 00:45:58,675
I love animals.

792
00:45:58,800 --> 00:46:00,885
So do I. They're great.

793
00:46:00,969 --> 00:46:02,345
RUTH:
Bobby!

794
00:46:02,429 --> 00:46:04,723
SHELLEY: Are you a Capricorn?
RUTH: Bobby!

795
00:46:07,851 --> 00:46:10,270
RUTH: Bobby!
- What is it?

796
00:46:11,813 --> 00:46:13,273
Shit.

797
00:46:13,398 --> 00:46:14,858
Sorry, what... what is it?

798
00:46:14,942 --> 00:46:16,735
RUTH: Jeremy!
BOYFRIEND: Oi! You!

799
00:46:16,818 --> 00:46:19,237
- Be nice to go out for a drink or something.
- Yes.

800
00:46:19,321 --> 00:46:21,406
- Nice to meet you. Bye.
- Bye.

801
00:46:26,745 --> 00:46:29,539
- That man stole my dog.
- Did he?

802
00:46:37,881 --> 00:46:39,549
(Bottles clank)

803
00:46:39,675 --> 00:46:41,635
(Heavy grunting)

804
00:46:48,851 --> 00:46:50,311
FERRIS: What are you doing?

805
00:46:52,688 --> 00:46:55,316
- Is's the gherkin man.
- What's this all about?

806
00:46:55,399 --> 00:46:57,610
Take no notice of him,
he's just the potato man.

807
00:46:57,693 --> 00:46:59,278
What's he doing up there?

808
00:46:59,361 --> 00:47:03,323
Trying to get some sleep,
so just deliver your gherkins and piss off.

809
00:47:03,448 --> 00:47:07,202
Don't tell me to piss off or I'll come up
and smack your face in for you.

810
00:47:07,286 --> 00:47:10,206
- You don't have to get all...
- Forget him, he's just a prat.

811
00:47:10,330 --> 00:47:12,207
I'm not taking any lip from a potato man.

812
00:47:12,291 --> 00:47:13,959
GIRL:
I know it's OK

813
00:47:14,084 --> 00:47:16,044
You signed for them gherkins, love?

814
00:47:17,212 --> 00:47:19,589
Hang on a minute.
That's my shelf!

815
00:47:19,715 --> 00:47:21,800
Oi! Potato man!

816
00:47:21,884 --> 00:47:24,303
You been messing about with my gherkins?

817
00:47:24,386 --> 00:47:27,097
No. This is... this is the vinegar shelf.

818
00:47:27,222 --> 00:47:28,974
I don't think so.

819
00:47:29,099 --> 00:47:32,227
They're just shelves.
Can everybody just leave it?

820
00:47:32,311 --> 00:47:36,607
Listen, potato boy, you keep your
hands off my gherkins, all right?

821
00:47:38,984 --> 00:47:41,612
- See you in a fortnight, love.
- Yeah. OK.

822
00:47:43,363 --> 00:47:45,031
What's all that about?

823
00:47:45,157 --> 00:47:47,951
Look what you've done now.
You've upset the gherkin man.

824
00:47:49,953 --> 00:47:52,539
Do you know what?
This is all bollocks.

825
00:47:52,664 --> 00:47:54,541
You treat this place like an hotel.

826
00:47:54,625 --> 00:47:58,796
Is's about time you realised, Ferris,
this is a chip shop, and don't you forget it.

827
00:47:59,630 --> 00:48:02,550
- Well, if that's how you want it, then...
(Door slams)

828
00:48:03,926 --> 00:48:06,011
SUPER PREACHERS: I Feel Happy

829
00:48:08,722 --> 00:48:10,265
I got flowers,

830
00:48:10,390 --> 00:48:12,475
I got chocolates for a special girl.

831
00:48:12,559 --> 00:48:14,644
- What are you after?
- Nothing.

832
00:48:14,770 --> 00:48:17,147
I thought we could go for a walk.

833
00:48:17,272 --> 00:48:19,858
I haven't really had time to
talk to you that much.

834
00:48:19,983 --> 00:48:22,694
So that's your game, is it?
Talking.

835
00:48:22,778 --> 00:48:24,863
I thought it'd be nice
- just me and you.

836
00:48:24,988 --> 00:48:28,825
Have a nice...conversation.
Go for a quick walk round the park.

837
00:48:28,951 --> 00:48:32,371
I hardly know you. I'm not going to go
walking round the park with you.

838
00:48:32,496 --> 00:48:34,456
All right, then, forget it.

839
00:48:35,707 --> 00:48:39,794
I'm having a few people round next week
for group sex, if you're interested.

840
00:48:39,878 --> 00:48:42,172
No, I... I think I'm busy that day.

841
00:48:42,297 --> 00:48:44,174
What day is it?

842
00:48:45,092 --> 00:48:46,343
Tuesday.

843
00:48:46,468 --> 00:48:48,637
No, I... I don't think so, you know.

844
00:48:48,762 --> 00:48:50,514
Please yourself.

845
00:48:50,639 --> 00:48:52,724
Right, well, I'd...better make a move.

846
00:48:52,808 --> 00:48:54,893
- Yeah, see you.
- Yeah.

847
00:48:57,604 --> 00:48:59,272
DAVE:
I've always fancied you.

848
00:48:59,398 --> 00:49:01,358
- Have you?
- Yeah.

849
00:49:02,317 --> 00:49:04,277
You've got your own house, haven't you?

850
00:49:04,403 --> 00:49:05,863
Yes.

851
00:49:05,946 --> 00:49:07,614
How many bedrooms you got?

852
00:49:07,739 --> 00:49:09,199
Three. Why?

853
00:49:09,283 --> 00:49:12,536
I bet it's...nice and clean,
isn't it?

854
00:49:12,619 --> 00:49:14,496
I've only got half an hour, you know!

855
00:49:14,621 --> 00:49:16,706
Right. OK. Well...

856
00:49:16,790 --> 00:49:20,127
I thought, you know,
we'd...start with some penis work.

857
00:49:20,252 --> 00:49:21,920
Like what?

858
00:49:22,004 --> 00:49:24,006
How does a blow job sound?

859
00:49:24,089 --> 00:49:25,674
I don't do that.

860
00:49:27,551 --> 00:49:29,511
Course you do.

861
00:49:29,636 --> 00:49:31,513
No, I don't like it.

862
00:49:31,597 --> 00:49:34,642
But it's great.
Is's...standard procedure.

863
00:49:34,725 --> 00:49:36,185
Would you do it?

864
00:49:37,978 --> 00:49:40,981
Yes, I would.
If it'd make the other person happy.

865
00:49:41,106 --> 00:49:43,066
Well, not me.

866
00:49:43,192 --> 00:49:45,361
What if I put strawberry jam on it?

867
00:49:45,485 --> 00:49:47,862
You're only a potato man.
I won't do anything weird.

868
00:49:47,988 --> 00:49:49,948
What do you mean, only a potato man?

869
00:49:50,073 --> 00:49:52,242
You've really spoilt the atmosphere now.

870
00:49:52,367 --> 00:49:55,078
You smell of chips
but I weren't going to say anything.

871
00:49:55,162 --> 00:49:56,830
You're a stupid idiot.

872
00:49:56,955 --> 00:49:59,124
Your hair smells of pickled onions.

873
00:49:59,249 --> 00:50:00,792
Well, you've got a horrible face.

874
00:50:02,461 --> 00:50:04,672
I'm not going to get anything
out of you, am I?

875
00:50:04,755 --> 00:50:06,632
Not now, no.

876
00:50:06,757 --> 00:50:08,509
I'm sorry, love.

877
00:50:08,634 --> 00:50:10,719
Look...I'll settle for a hand job.

878
00:50:10,802 --> 00:50:12,387
You'll be lucky.

879
00:50:12,471 --> 00:50:15,391
- Well, how about some free chips?
- Piss off, Dave.

880
00:50:26,568 --> 00:50:29,488
So what do you reckon my chances are
with whatsit?

881
00:50:29,571 --> 00:50:31,364
I wouldn't get your hopes up, Dave.

882
00:50:31,448 --> 00:50:34,493
She's only been out the coma
a couple of week s.

883
00:50:34,576 --> 00:50:38,246
She'll still be pissed off about
her husband being dead and that.

884
00:50:38,330 --> 00:50:40,833
So you're saying play it cool,
sort of thing.

885
00:50:40,958 --> 00:50:42,918
Yeah, I can do that.

886
00:50:44,711 --> 00:50:46,671
Is's lovely and clean, innit?

887
00:50:46,797 --> 00:50:49,717
- Is's a nice house you've got here, Helen.
- Thanks.

888
00:50:49,800 --> 00:50:52,219
Steve was pretty good
with the decorating.

889
00:50:52,302 --> 00:50:54,387
That was one of his things.

890
00:50:55,430 --> 00:50:58,141
I'm sorry for you about
what happened to him.

891
00:50:58,267 --> 00:51:01,395
A motorway pile-up, it's terrible.

892
00:51:01,478 --> 00:51:04,398
I heard it was a really
nice car an' all.

893
00:51:04,523 --> 00:51:06,692
What was it, a Renault?

894
00:51:06,817 --> 00:51:09,320
Thought we'd just come round,
see how you are.

895
00:51:09,403 --> 00:51:11,196
If there's anything we can do.

896
00:51:11,280 --> 00:51:12,948
Well, thanks for the potatoes.

897
00:51:13,073 --> 00:51:15,450
DAVE: There's plenty more
where they come from.

898
00:51:15,576 --> 00:51:17,745
We'll see you all right.
Don't you worry.

899
00:51:21,832 --> 00:51:24,418
I could really do with it right now!

900
00:51:24,543 --> 00:51:26,503
If you've got it, that is.

901
00:51:27,462 --> 00:51:29,422
Course, yeah.

902
00:51:29,548 --> 00:51:32,342
It must be really difficult
for you right now.

903
00:51:33,510 --> 00:51:35,887
But no use crying over spilt milk,
is there?

904
00:51:36,013 --> 00:51:39,225
You've got to...
You need a man about the place.

905
00:51:39,349 --> 00:51:42,978
Yeah, well, Phil's been very good to me
the past few weeks.

906
00:51:43,103 --> 00:51:45,272
Phil? Phil who?

907
00:51:45,397 --> 00:51:47,357
All right, lads?

908
00:51:47,482 --> 00:51:49,985
DAVE: What are you doing here?
- I live here.

909
00:51:50,068 --> 00:51:51,236
Since when?

910
00:51:51,320 --> 00:51:54,865
Phil delivers biscuits to the hospital.
That's how we met.

911
00:51:54,990 --> 00:51:57,367
Fancy a biscuit, Dave? Ferris?

912
00:51:57,492 --> 00:51:59,369
No.

913
00:51:59,453 --> 00:52:02,498
So, how's life been treating the potato men?

914
00:52:03,332 --> 00:52:05,626
- Look out, Phil, there's a wasp!
- Where?

915
00:52:21,892 --> 00:52:24,686
Ferris, the gherkin man means nothing to me.

916
00:52:24,811 --> 00:52:26,563
I was just trying to make you jealous.

917
00:52:26,688 --> 00:52:29,900
Seeing you with that other girl made me realise
you're not a bad bloke.

918
00:52:30,025 --> 00:52:33,445
Well, I didn't even know her name, to be honest.
That was just a...

919
00:52:33,570 --> 00:52:35,238
I can see us making a go of it.

920
00:52:35,322 --> 00:52:38,784
Not just shagging in this crappy old storeroom
all the time.

921
00:52:38,867 --> 00:52:41,078
I'm talking about something more.

922
00:52:41,161 --> 00:52:43,038
Like what?

923
00:52:43,163 --> 00:52:45,332
We could do it lying down. On a bed.

924
00:52:45,457 --> 00:52:47,334
I like the sound of that.

925
00:52:47,417 --> 00:52:49,419
My husband's away for a few days.

926
00:52:49,503 --> 00:52:53,882
Why don't you come back to the house tonight?
We've got a big double bed, fluffy carpets.

927
00:52:54,007 --> 00:52:57,135
If you bring some cans of beer,
I'll bring some leftover pies

928
00:52:57,219 --> 00:52:59,221
and we'll make a night of it.

929
00:52:59,304 --> 00:53:00,764
Ace.

930
00:53:02,641 --> 00:53:04,518
(Girl grunts)

931
00:53:10,691 --> 00:53:13,694
This is better than
that stinky old stockroom, innit?

932
00:53:13,819 --> 00:53:16,196
Yeah, it's all right. When's your husband back?

933
00:53:16,321 --> 00:53:17,864
Oh, not for ages.

934
00:53:17,990 --> 00:53:20,784
Monday, I think.
Is's a long drive from Poland.

935
00:53:20,909 --> 00:53:23,495
- What's he doing there?
- Smuggling.

936
00:53:23,620 --> 00:53:26,748
- Smuggling?
- Yeah, smuggling...motorbikes.

937
00:53:26,832 --> 00:53:28,500
Is he?

938
00:53:28,625 --> 00:53:30,710
I'm thinking of buying a moped.

939
00:53:30,794 --> 00:53:32,379
MAN: Shit!

940
00:53:32,462 --> 00:53:33,838
Fucking hell!

941
00:53:34,673 --> 00:53:36,550
- I thought he was in Poland.
- Erm...

942
00:53:36,633 --> 00:53:38,301
Listen, Ferris.

943
00:53:38,427 --> 00:53:41,639
You breathe one word of this to anybody,
you're dead. Right?

944
00:53:41,763 --> 00:53:45,183
OK. I'll...
I'll just get dressed and go and...

945
00:53:45,309 --> 00:53:48,312
You ain't going anywhere.
You finish what you started.

946
00:53:48,437 --> 00:53:51,023
- How do you mean?
- Come on. Get on with it.

947
00:53:51,148 --> 00:53:53,859
Shag my wife, Ferris,
or you're in big trouble.

948
00:54:03,452 --> 00:54:06,664
Don't make me come out there, Ferris!
I'm warning you!

949
00:54:09,082 --> 00:54:11,042
I hope my husband doesn't catch us.

950
00:54:11,168 --> 00:54:14,171
- This is out of order.
- Shut up, Ferris.

951
00:54:14,296 --> 00:54:17,424
- You said he was in Poland
(Grunting in wardrobe)

952
00:54:17,508 --> 00:54:19,719
He's in the fucking wardrobe.

953
00:54:20,636 --> 00:54:24,181
If he finds out,
he's going to punish me real bad.

954
00:54:24,306 --> 00:54:26,600
You and me are finished,
I'm telling you.

955
00:54:26,683 --> 00:54:28,894
Oh, use me. Use me!

956
00:54:28,977 --> 00:54:31,271
Like the slutty wife I am.

957
00:54:32,439 --> 00:54:34,399
(Husband grunts)

958
00:54:42,658 --> 00:54:44,535
That should fucking do it.

959
00:54:44,618 --> 00:54:46,620
- Am I being held prisoner?
- No!

960
00:54:47,746 --> 00:54:49,539
Well... A little bit.

961
00:54:49,623 --> 00:54:51,291
But it's just a game.

962
00:54:51,416 --> 00:54:53,501
- Is it?
- (Husband slams fist) Look!

963
00:54:53,585 --> 00:54:58,590
Any more shit from you, sunshine, and I'll drown
you in the bath like I did that sackful of kittens.

964
00:54:59,424 --> 00:55:01,301
That really turned me on.

965
00:55:02,344 --> 00:55:03,303
What?

966
00:55:03,387 --> 00:55:04,847
Is's a game.

967
00:55:04,972 --> 00:55:06,849
You're not going to drown me, are you?

968
00:55:06,932 --> 00:55:09,643
I'll punch you in the fucking face
if you don't shut it.

969
00:55:12,980 --> 00:55:15,065
I thought you liked having sex with me.

970
00:55:15,190 --> 00:55:16,733
Not like this. This is...

971
00:55:16,859 --> 00:55:18,944
GIRL:
This is how I like it.

972
00:55:19,027 --> 00:55:22,489
Next time, we'll do whatever you want.
I'll do anything you want.

973
00:55:22,573 --> 00:55:24,658
- Think of something.
(Power tools whir)

974
00:55:27,369 --> 00:55:30,289
There is one or two things I
wouldn't mind trying.

975
00:55:31,123 --> 00:55:35,294
I've got some right stuff in store for you
over the next few week s, Ferris. Oh, yes.

976
00:55:35,419 --> 00:55:38,005
Some really fucked-up shit.

977
00:55:39,673 --> 00:55:41,675
Get him down in the basement.

978
00:55:41,758 --> 00:55:45,095
Come on. (Grunts and laughs)

979
00:55:46,054 --> 00:55:48,223
- What do you keep in the basement?
- Come on.

980
00:55:48,348 --> 00:55:51,142
- Have you got a pool table?
- (Husband laughs)

981
00:55:51,268 --> 00:55:53,228
(Girl grunts)

982
00:56:07,534 --> 00:56:09,411
If I can't see you,

983
00:56:09,494 --> 00:56:11,496
you can't see me.

984
00:56:13,874 --> 00:56:18,253
If my husband walk s in here now
and catches us, we're dead.

985
00:56:18,378 --> 00:56:21,298
If the rope breaks, we're dead.

986
00:56:21,381 --> 00:56:23,383
HUSBAND: Oh! Who wants salt and vinegar?

987
00:56:24,510 --> 00:56:26,095
Oh, God. No.

988
00:56:26,178 --> 00:56:27,763
Ahhhh!

989
00:56:29,932 --> 00:56:31,517
FERRIS: Fu...
(Splash)

990
00:56:35,354 --> 00:56:37,565
I had to park bloody miles away.

991
00:56:38,482 --> 00:56:40,567
And they've dug up Old Ford Road again.

992
00:56:42,361 --> 00:56:44,113
Got the Allen key, by the way.

993
00:56:44,947 --> 00:56:47,032
(Chatter)

994
00:56:50,369 --> 00:56:52,371
No wonder I couldn't get parked.

995
00:56:55,582 --> 00:56:57,459
(Poppy moans)

996
00:56:58,418 --> 00:56:59,878
(Men pant heavily )

997
00:56:59,962 --> 00:57:02,673
We could do with a couple more girls
in here, couldn't we?

998
00:57:02,798 --> 00:57:04,550
Yeah.

999
00:57:04,675 --> 00:57:06,343
Where did you park, then?

1000
00:57:06,426 --> 00:57:08,428
Right outside. Got here early.

1001
00:57:09,680 --> 00:57:12,183
Is that your Ford Galaxy out there,
the blue one?

1002
00:57:12,266 --> 00:57:14,143
- Yeah.
- What's it like? All right?

1003
00:57:14,268 --> 00:57:17,897
Is's a decent motor. Feels safe,
know what I mean? For the kids, and that.

1004
00:57:18,021 --> 00:57:19,481
(Poppy's moaning intensifies)

1005
00:57:19,565 --> 00:57:22,485
- Is there any more beer left?
- No. Is's all gone.

1006
00:57:22,609 --> 00:57:25,612
- There's wine.
- Wine? Who drink s fucking wine?

1007
00:57:25,737 --> 00:57:29,783
How much longer you going to be, mate?
There's people queuing up here.

1008
00:57:30,826 --> 00:57:32,494
What number you got?

1009
00:57:32,619 --> 00:57:33,537
5.

1010
00:57:33,662 --> 00:57:35,622
Well, you're all right.

1011
00:57:35,747 --> 00:57:37,707
11. Is's typical.

1012
00:57:48,677 --> 00:57:50,554
What have we come here for?

1013
00:57:50,637 --> 00:57:54,391
This is where I met Vicky.
Is's a good night in here on a Saturday.

1014
00:57:54,516 --> 00:57:56,476
FERRIS: But it's only quarter past one.

1015
00:57:56,602 --> 00:57:58,687
DAVE: Is's like a trip down
memory lane for me.

1016
00:58:00,230 --> 00:58:03,150
Or it would be if I could remember
anything about it.

1017
00:58:03,275 --> 00:58:05,235
I'd had a few that night.

1018
00:58:06,195 --> 00:58:08,781
Never going to pick up any birds
in here, mate.

1019
00:58:08,906 --> 00:58:13,786
It'll be all right. We'll have a couple of pints
and then...it will pick up a bit later.

1020
00:58:46,652 --> 00:58:48,737
Backing track to Come On, Eileen

1021
00:58:51,865 --> 00:58:53,950
Come on, Eileen!

1022
00:58:57,496 --> 00:59:01,125
These people round here

1023
00:59:01,959 --> 00:59:04,378
Wear beaten-down eyes...

1024
00:59:04,461 --> 00:59:06,755
..resigned to what their fate is

1025
00:59:07,589 --> 00:59:10,217
My mother cried!

1026
00:59:10,300 --> 00:59:11,760
No never.

1027
00:59:11,885 --> 00:59:14,888
We are far too youg and clever
Much too youg and clever

1028
00:59:15,013 --> 00:59:16,056
Come on, Eileen

1029
00:59:16,139 --> 00:59:22,729
Too-ra loo-ra, too-ra loo rye aye

1030
00:59:24,606 --> 00:59:26,066
Come on, Eileen

1031
00:59:28,652 --> 00:59:30,320
Come on, Eileen

1032
00:59:30,445 --> 00:59:32,197
I swear now, Eileen

1033
00:59:32,322 --> 00:59:35,116
At this moment
Dirty!

1034
00:59:35,242 --> 00:59:37,411
You mean everything
Everything

1035
00:59:37,536 --> 00:59:39,204
Pretty white dress

1036
00:59:39,288 --> 00:59:41,290
Oh, you're verging on...dress

1037
00:59:41,373 --> 00:59:43,166
Oh, you're dirty!

1038
00:59:43,250 --> 00:59:45,878
Oh, come on, Eileen

1039
00:59:45,961 --> 00:59:47,963
That pretty red dress.

1040
00:59:48,046 --> 00:59:49,839
Oh, I swear...
Tell me yes.

1041
00:59:49,923 --> 00:59:51,508
Oh, you're dirty

1042
00:59:52,634 --> 00:59:56,596
Oh, come on, Eileen...dirty

1043
00:59:59,224 --> 01:00:01,601
DAVE: You all right then?
VICKY: Yeah

1044
01:00:01,727 --> 01:00:05,147
The washing machine,
there's still water coming out of it.

1045
01:00:06,315 --> 01:00:08,901
Probably a...leak...

1046
01:00:09,026 --> 01:00:10,903
of some kind.

1047
01:00:10,986 --> 01:00:12,654
How have you been?

1048
01:00:12,779 --> 01:00:15,156
Great. Everything's great.

1049
01:00:16,825 --> 01:00:19,453
You know, things are really starting to...

1050
01:00:21,121 --> 01:00:23,081
They're continuing to be great

1051
01:00:23,207 --> 01:00:24,667
So er

1052
01:00:24,750 --> 01:00:27,044
You all right, then?

1053
01:00:27,169 --> 01:00:29,755
Yeah. You all right?

1054
01:00:29,880 --> 01:00:32,257
Yeah. Great.

1055
01:00:32,382 --> 01:00:35,802
Everything's...great.

1056
01:00:37,596 --> 01:00:40,808
You know, if you want me back,
I can move in straightaway.

1057
01:00:41,767 --> 01:00:43,519
Let's just leave things as they are.

1058
01:00:44,478 --> 01:00:47,272
Whatever it is you want me to do,
I'll do it.

1059
01:00:47,397 --> 01:00:49,566
At Tolly's there's never anything to eat.

1060
01:00:49,691 --> 01:00:52,068
He's dirty I want to come home.

1061
01:00:52,903 --> 01:00:56,031
I don't want to live with Tolly.
I want to live with you and Katie.

1062
01:00:57,491 --> 01:00:58,867
Well, you can't.

1063
01:00:58,951 --> 01:01:00,202
Why not?

1064
01:01:00,327 --> 01:01:02,412
Is's not as simple as that.

1065
01:01:03,247 --> 01:01:06,041
You know the person I feel
sorry for in all this...

1066
01:01:06,166 --> 01:01:07,709
is me.

1067
01:01:26,061 --> 01:01:27,646
Hello.

1068
01:01:30,148 --> 01:01:33,360
Whatever that woman told you
about me, it's not true.

1069
01:01:33,485 --> 01:01:34,736
You stole her dog.

1070
01:01:34,820 --> 01:01:36,196
(Laughs nervously )

1071
01:01:36,280 --> 01:01:38,783
That boyfriend of hers,
he's not right in the head.

1072
01:01:38,907 --> 01:01:40,659
I never stole any dog.

1073
01:01:40,784 --> 01:01:42,744
That's...no...

1074
01:01:43,912 --> 01:01:45,789
Actually, yes, I did steal the dog,

1075
01:01:45,873 --> 01:01:49,752
but...you...can't know
what I went through with all that.

1076
01:01:49,835 --> 01:01:51,920
I've got my own dog now.

1077
01:01:52,880 --> 01:01:56,509
She messed me about rotten.
I was just trying to get my own back.

1078
01:01:57,467 --> 01:01:59,427
I know what you're thinking, but...

1079
01:01:59,553 --> 01:02:02,765
you don't know what I've been through
with that woman.

1080
01:02:04,641 --> 01:02:07,060
- Come on, Spike.
- No I...I do

1081
01:02:08,312 --> 01:02:11,649
I do know what you've been through.
I know exactly how you feel.

1082
01:02:11,732 --> 01:02:13,817
Do you?

1083
01:02:14,985 --> 01:02:16,737
How do you mean?

1084
01:02:16,862 --> 01:02:20,824
SHELLEY: He'd been seeing her for five weeks.
I didn't ever twig.

1085
01:02:20,908 --> 01:02:22,910
I just thought, "That's not right."

1086
01:02:22,993 --> 01:02:26,038
Then I found out he was taking her
to Paris for the weekend.

1087
01:02:26,121 --> 01:02:29,041
(Sighs) I still had the keys to his house so...

1088
01:02:29,166 --> 01:02:30,709
I went round there...

1089
01:02:31,877 --> 01:02:34,254
I went into the kitchen and
I'd got some of

1090
01:02:34,379 --> 01:02:38,008
Crystal's you know dog mess
that I'd collected in the park.

1091
01:02:39,593 --> 01:02:42,721
And before that I'd collected quite
a lot from other dogs.

1092
01:02:54,066 --> 01:02:56,068
I put some in the bienden

1093
01:02:56,151 --> 01:02:58,028
added some water and erm.

1094
01:02:58,862 --> 01:02:59,905
(Whirs)

1095
01:03:02,824 --> 01:03:05,327
Colli had this high-powered waterpistol.

1096
01:03:05,452 --> 01:03:07,621
And I knew it was a mad thing to do but

1097
01:03:08,664 --> 01:03:11,917
after the way he treated me
I just didn't care.

1098
01:03:12,000 --> 01:03:14,085
I just thought "Fuck him."

1099
01:03:20,259 --> 01:03:22,219
I did every room in the house.

1100
01:03:23,262 --> 01:03:25,556
That was a year ago.
You can still smell it.

1101
01:03:27,140 --> 01:03:30,560
Yeah, well, nothing smells quite like
a house full of dog shit.

1102
01:03:33,188 --> 01:03:36,108
With erm... With Ruth...

1103
01:03:37,359 --> 01:03:39,319
I told her I was a dentist.

1104
01:03:41,822 --> 01:03:43,824
Kept it up for months.

1105
01:03:43,907 --> 01:03:45,909
She thought it was great.

1106
01:03:45,993 --> 01:03:48,496
I told her I had my own
dental practice.

1107
01:03:50,080 --> 01:03:53,083
And her mam and dad
were pretty impressed as well.

1108
01:03:54,960 --> 01:03:59,882
But when she found out I worked in the
potato distributior business which is what I do

1109
01:03:59,965 --> 01:04:01,842
she went spane.

1110
01:04:01,967 --> 01:04:05,596
Called me a liar
which is fair enough I suppose,

1111
01:04:06,638 --> 01:04:09,474
A few days later she rang me up
but that was that.

1112
01:04:10,309 --> 01:04:13,521
I tried to talk to her but
she wasn't having any of it.

1113
01:04:15,606 --> 01:04:17,483
I don't care any more anyway.

1114
01:04:18,317 --> 01:04:20,319
I'm a potato man. That's what I do.

1115
01:04:22,404 --> 01:04:24,698
Doesn't make me a bad person.

1116
01:04:25,532 --> 01:04:27,701
Would you like to see my horse?

1117
01:04:29,578 --> 01:04:31,580
(Grunting and groaning)

1118
01:04:37,294 --> 01:04:38,962
Phew!

1119
01:04:39,087 --> 01:04:40,964
- Well, well!
(Horse neighs)

1120
01:05:02,528 --> 01:05:05,239
OPERATOR:
Your fun box has one new message.

1121
01:05:05,364 --> 01:05:08,075
WOMAN:
Hiya Tolly my name's Gloria.

1122
01:05:08,158 --> 01:05:11,703
I really like your message.
You sound like you're up for a laugh.

1123
01:05:11,828 --> 01:05:14,539
Fucking yes! Yes!

1124
01:05:19,753 --> 01:05:20,879
(Rings bell)

1125
01:05:21,004 --> 01:05:23,089
This is very nice, Gloria,
thanks for this.

1126
01:05:23,173 --> 01:05:26,426
Good idea, get to know each other.
I haven't been to a party for ages.

1127
01:05:26,510 --> 01:05:29,138
- How come?
- Dunno. Don't get invited to any.

1128
01:05:31,223 --> 01:05:33,308
Gloria, hello! Come on in,
nice to see you!

1129
01:05:33,392 --> 01:05:35,269
Told you I'd make it!

1130
01:05:35,394 --> 01:05:38,188
- Nice to see you.
- All right, mate. Been swimming?

1131
01:05:38,313 --> 01:05:40,065
- Eh?
- Don't matter.

1132
01:05:41,108 --> 01:05:44,028
- Is this what I think it is?
- Depends. What do you think it is?

1133
01:05:44,152 --> 01:05:46,446
Is's obviously some sort of towel party.

1134
01:05:46,530 --> 01:05:48,407
Is's a sex party.

1135
01:05:48,532 --> 01:05:50,409
Fucking hell! Honestly?

1136
01:05:50,492 --> 01:05:53,412
Hey, I've heard about these.
Is's like, anything goes.

1137
01:05:53,537 --> 01:05:55,497
Is's like a big orgy. Brilliant!

1138
01:06:08,427 --> 01:06:10,429
What a sight

1139
01:06:11,555 --> 01:06:14,058
Is's got a certain style

1140
01:06:14,183 --> 01:06:16,143
Hits the spot

1141
01:06:16,268 --> 01:06:18,228
Hits it right

1142
01:06:20,105 --> 01:06:21,773
Take your chance

1143
01:06:21,899 --> 01:06:25,236
Don't miss out, it's so near

1144
01:06:26,153 --> 01:06:29,615
Grab it, now's the time, cos it's here

1145
01:06:31,700 --> 01:06:33,660
Plat du jour

1146
01:06:34,494 --> 01:06:37,122
Served right up for you

1147
01:06:37,206 --> 01:06:39,500
One tasty dish

1148
01:06:39,625 --> 01:06:41,585
Is's a cure

1149
01:06:43,170 --> 01:06:45,047
Keep on track

1150
01:06:45,881 --> 01:06:48,675
And now it's right on stream

1151
01:06:48,800 --> 01:06:50,677
lt'll keep you

1152
01:06:51,512 --> 01:06:53,597
Ahead of the pack

1153
01:06:54,723 --> 01:06:56,808
Don't miss out

1154
01:06:56,934 --> 01:06:58,894
GLORIA:
How was that then?

1155
01:07:01,104 --> 01:07:02,856
Was that what you wanted?

1156
01:07:02,981 --> 01:07:04,941
Yeah, it was great, yeah. Thanks.

1157
01:07:05,776 --> 01:07:07,653
You don't sound very happy about it.

1158
01:07:07,778 --> 01:07:09,530
No, I'm just, you know.

1159
01:07:09,655 --> 01:07:13,492
- Do you want to do it some more?
- No, that was... That was it.

1160
01:07:14,535 --> 01:07:16,620
I could do with a cup of tea,
actually.

1161
01:07:17,788 --> 01:07:19,748
All this jam.

1162
01:07:39,560 --> 01:07:41,228
Sleeping here now, are you?

1163
01:07:41,353 --> 01:07:42,271
FERRIS:
Yeah

1164
01:07:43,438 --> 01:07:46,650
That chip shop -
I got my fingers burnt there, mate.

1165
01:07:46,775 --> 01:07:49,152
- Did you?
- Yeah. Look.

1166
01:07:51,655 --> 01:07:54,158
Trying to get a pound coin
out the fat-fryer.

1167
01:07:54,283 --> 01:07:56,035
- Bet it hurt.
- Did.

1168
01:07:56,159 --> 01:07:58,536
And I nearly got beat
up by big fat Gordon.

1169
01:07:58,662 --> 01:08:00,539
I've warned you about him.

1170
01:08:00,622 --> 01:08:02,499
He catch you with his missus, did he?

1171
01:08:02,624 --> 01:08:04,167
Yeah, something like that.

1172
01:08:04,293 --> 01:08:06,045
You want to keep a low profile.

1173
01:08:06,170 --> 01:08:08,464
I'm gonna. Anyway, have a look at this.

1174
01:08:10,757 --> 01:08:12,425
(Beeps horn)

1175
01:08:12,509 --> 01:08:14,511
- What do you reckon?
- Oh, magic.

1176
01:08:14,595 --> 01:08:16,263
Funky moped.

1177
01:08:16,388 --> 01:08:18,140
I see what's going on here.

1178
01:08:18,265 --> 01:08:22,853
You've had enough of women for
t'time being and it's going to
be you and the moped for a bit,

1179
01:08:22,936 --> 01:08:26,064
so you're... you're expressing yourself
in a different way.

1180
01:08:26,190 --> 01:08:28,150
No, mate. This is a fanny magnet.

1181
01:08:28,275 --> 01:08:30,986
I'm gonna be knee-deep in pussy
with this thing.

1182
01:08:31,069 --> 01:08:33,071
- What did it cost you?
- Nothing.

1183
01:08:33,155 --> 01:08:34,823
I borrowed it off a mate of mine.

1184
01:08:34,948 --> 01:08:36,700
I'm thinking of buying it, though.

1185
01:08:36,825 --> 01:08:38,076
You reckon I should get one?

1186
01:08:38,160 --> 01:08:39,745
(Starts engine)
- Is's up to you.

1187
01:08:39,828 --> 01:08:41,830
Give us a go, then.

1188
01:08:45,375 --> 01:08:47,460
- That's the accelerator.
- Yeah, I know.

1189
01:08:47,544 --> 01:08:49,421
- Is's nice, innit?
- Yeah.

1190
01:08:50,380 --> 01:08:51,423
Oh, fuck!

1191
01:08:51,507 --> 01:08:53,592
Dave! Dave!

1192
01:08:56,637 --> 01:08:57,972
Fuck!

1193
01:08:59,139 --> 01:09:01,850
DEXY'S MIDNIGHT RUNNERS:
There, There, My Dear

1194
01:09:01,934 --> 01:09:04,645
Just say a situation occurred
that was out of your hands.

1195
01:09:04,770 --> 01:09:06,730
You know, human error.

1196
01:09:06,855 --> 01:09:08,815
Police horse sat on it. That'll do.

1197
01:09:08,941 --> 01:09:10,901
He's 24. He'll understand.

1198
01:09:11,026 --> 01:09:12,569
You should pay for the repairs.

1199
01:09:13,403 --> 01:09:15,071
Here he comes. Just act normal.

1200
01:09:16,532 --> 01:09:18,743
- All right, Ferris?
- All right, Beans.

1201
01:09:18,825 --> 01:09:21,453
So what do you think, then?
You buying my moped?

1202
01:09:21,537 --> 01:09:23,622
Erm...

1203
01:09:24,456 --> 01:09:26,333
What do you think, Dave?

1204
01:09:28,544 --> 01:09:30,421
I'm going for a piss.

1205
01:09:30,504 --> 01:09:32,798
Is's hardly done any miles.
Is's a bargain.

1206
01:09:33,632 --> 01:09:35,634
Yeah. All right, then, I'll have it.

1207
01:09:35,717 --> 01:09:38,428
Nice one, Ferris.
I'll see you later on in the week.

1208
01:09:38,554 --> 01:09:40,222
I've got to get off, I'm with Debs.

1209
01:09:40,305 --> 01:09:43,433
- Yeah, I'll settle up with you when I see you.
- Sorted.

1210
01:09:48,647 --> 01:09:50,941
Piss off, Dave. Leaving me to sort it out.

1211
01:09:52,609 --> 01:09:54,820
I want a word with you. Outside.

1212
01:10:01,994 --> 01:10:04,079
She's in the back seat.

1213
01:10:06,290 --> 01:10:07,833
You want me to give her one?

1214
01:10:07,958 --> 01:10:09,626
Yeah.

1215
01:10:09,710 --> 01:10:11,587
Where are you going to be?

1216
01:10:11,712 --> 01:10:13,797
Never you mind.

1217
01:10:14,631 --> 01:10:17,008
What you waiting for? Want some of this?
Eh?

1218
01:10:17,134 --> 01:10:19,094
Get in there.

1219
01:10:19,219 --> 01:10:20,887
Come on!

1220
01:10:25,475 --> 01:10:27,769
I'm going to have flat beer because of you.

1221
01:10:28,896 --> 01:10:33,275
If my husband finds out about us...
in the back of his car

1222
01:10:33,400 --> 01:10:35,694
doing it doggy-style,

1223
01:10:35,777 --> 01:10:37,654
he'll put me across his knee.

1224
01:10:37,779 --> 01:10:40,156
FERRIS: This is the last time
I'm doing this.

1225
01:10:40,282 --> 01:10:42,034
GlRL: Use me. Use me.

1226
01:10:42,159 --> 01:10:44,745
- You're using me.
- Shut up, Ferris, you tart.

1227
01:10:44,870 --> 01:10:46,622
Just think of my big fat husband.

1228
01:10:46,747 --> 01:10:49,458
And what he'll do to me if he finds out.

1229
01:10:49,458 --> 01:10:52,169
My big...fat...husband.

1230
01:10:52,252 --> 01:10:53,712
Right. That's it.

1231
01:10:53,837 --> 01:10:55,380
I've had enough of this.

1232
01:10:55,506 --> 01:10:57,383
Ferris?

1233
01:10:57,466 --> 01:10:59,343
- Ferris!
(Grunting from car boot)

1234
01:11:01,345 --> 01:11:02,263
Dave.

1235
01:11:03,847 --> 01:11:05,182
Come here!

1236
01:11:09,269 --> 01:11:11,354
What do you think you're doing?

1237
01:11:11,438 --> 01:11:13,857
Tell him, Dave.
Tell him to leave me alone.

1238
01:11:13,941 --> 01:11:15,943
This ain't nowt to do wi' me, Ferris.

1239
01:11:16,026 --> 01:11:17,486
Get back in the car, you.

1240
01:11:17,611 --> 01:11:19,279
Dave, I'm asking you to help me.

1241
01:11:19,363 --> 01:11:22,074
- What are you doing, Gordon?
- None of your business.

1242
01:11:22,199 --> 01:11:23,659
Dave!

1243
01:11:23,742 --> 01:11:25,744
What? I don't even know what's going on!

1244
01:11:25,827 --> 01:11:28,038
- Keep your mouth shut, Ferris.
- No Gordon!

1245
01:11:28,121 --> 01:11:31,041
I don't care if you beat me up,
I'm not doing this any more.

1246
01:11:31,166 --> 01:11:34,795
- We'll see about that.
- No. If I carry on doing this,
stuff like this,

1247
01:11:34,920 --> 01:11:38,340
it's going to put me off sex for life,
and that's not going to happen.

1248
01:11:38,465 --> 01:11:40,759
OK? My sex life...is all I've got.

1249
01:11:40,843 --> 01:11:43,679
- I'm not doing it, Gordon.
- Yeah, you tell him, Ferris.

1250
01:11:43,762 --> 01:11:48,767
And if you've got a problem with that,
me and Dave are going to beat you up,
aren't we, Dave?

1251
01:11:48,892 --> 01:11:50,435
Dave?

1252
01:11:50,561 --> 01:11:53,689
Yeah, that's right.
D-Don't mess with the potato men.

1253
01:11:53,772 --> 01:11:55,357
You're a pair of fucking idiots!

1254
01:11:55,440 --> 01:11:58,151
Yeah, well, you're locked in
the boot of your car.

1255
01:11:58,277 --> 01:12:00,237
You'd better let him out or he'll go mad.

1256
01:12:00,362 --> 01:12:01,822
Yeah, I suppose so.

1257
01:12:01,905 --> 01:12:03,907
You dickhead!

1258
01:12:03,991 --> 01:12:06,494
I opened the boot
to show there's no hard feelings!

1259
01:12:06,618 --> 01:12:08,578
Why don't you both just fuck off?

1260
01:12:08,704 --> 01:12:10,456
All right, we will!

1261
01:12:10,581 --> 01:12:12,541
Come on, Dave.

1262
01:12:18,088 --> 01:12:19,840
Gordon's bottle went, didn't it?

1263
01:12:19,965 --> 01:12:23,093
It was when you said,
"Don't mess with the potato men."

1264
01:12:23,177 --> 01:12:25,888
Yeah, I wish I hadn't said that now.
Sounds stupid.

1265
01:12:26,013 --> 01:12:28,516
You're going to have to get
that moped repaired.

1266
01:12:28,599 --> 01:12:32,061
- Yeah, I'll pay for it.
- Good. I'm still thinking of buying it.

1267
01:12:32,144 --> 01:12:34,647
Fuck it, I am going to buy it.
I'm buying a moped.

1268
01:12:34,771 --> 01:12:38,108
- Is's got a big dent in it.
- Don't care. I'm buying a moped.

1269
01:12:46,533 --> 01:12:48,535
Joan?

1270
01:12:49,995 --> 01:12:51,663
What's going on?

1271
01:12:52,789 --> 01:12:55,083
- Not you again?
- What do you want, Ferris?

1272
01:12:55,209 --> 01:12:57,294
Nothing.

1273
01:12:57,377 --> 01:12:59,254
I thought you might like
to see my moped.

1274
01:13:00,714 --> 01:13:03,217
He's got a massive cock.

1275
01:13:10,724 --> 01:13:12,809
(Chatter)

1276
01:13:21,568 --> 01:13:23,236
(Chink s glass)

1277
01:13:23,362 --> 01:13:25,322
Thank you Er.

1278
01:13:25,447 --> 01:13:28,450
Thank you. Thank s. Erm...

1279
01:13:28,575 --> 01:13:31,369
I just want to say thank s for coming
at short notice

1280
01:13:31,495 --> 01:13:35,332
to this occasion to celebrate that
me and Shelley have got engaged.

1281
01:13:35,457 --> 01:13:36,792
(Half-hearted cheer)

1282
01:13:37,960 --> 01:13:40,254
Erm... Is's been a whirlwind romance.

1283
01:13:40,337 --> 01:13:42,965
We're both madly in love.

1284
01:13:48,178 --> 01:13:50,972
Shelley's what I've been looking
for all my life.

1285
01:13:51,098 --> 01:13:53,809
And she's got
what she's always been looking for -

1286
01:13:53,892 --> 01:13:55,352
a potato man.

1287
01:13:56,103 --> 01:13:57,855
(Tolly cheers)

1288
01:13:59,648 --> 01:14:01,608
Seriously... Er...thank s.

1289
01:14:01,733 --> 01:14:04,110
Erm... Here's to me and Shelley.

1290
01:14:05,362 --> 01:14:06,530
ALL: Cheers.

1291
01:14:06,613 --> 01:14:09,741
There's plenty of crisps and nuts
if you er...want to er...

1292
01:14:12,369 --> 01:14:14,329
(Guests chatter animatedly )

1293
01:14:15,372 --> 01:14:17,457
A bit of all right, that Shelley,
isn't she?

1294
01:14:17,583 --> 01:14:19,668
She keeps looking over here.

1295
01:14:21,003 --> 01:14:22,796
I think she fancies me.

1296
01:14:22,880 --> 01:14:24,340
Don't be stupid.

1297
01:14:25,174 --> 01:14:27,385
Why can't I find a nice sensible
girl like that?

1298
01:14:27,467 --> 01:14:29,761
Yeah, I know. Is's not fair, is it?

1299
01:14:30,929 --> 01:14:32,889
I'm moving my stuff into Tolly's tonight.

1300
01:14:33,015 --> 01:14:36,143
Yeah, you'll like it.
He's er... He's got a nice place.

1301
01:14:37,269 --> 01:14:39,897
Is's good timing for me,
you moving out and that.

1302
01:14:39,980 --> 01:14:41,982
I needed to move on.

1303
01:14:42,065 --> 01:14:44,985
Start a new chapter. Make a fresh start.

1304
01:14:45,110 --> 01:14:46,570
- Sleeping in the van?
- Yeah.

1305
01:14:46,653 --> 01:14:48,113
Be all right.

1306
01:14:49,698 --> 01:14:53,744
Is's only for a couple of nights, though,
cos I think I've found somewhere new.

1307
01:14:53,869 --> 01:14:56,580
Is's temporary,
but it's better than the van.

1308
01:14:56,663 --> 01:14:58,331
Where's that, then?

1309
01:14:58,457 --> 01:15:00,000
Where?

1310
01:15:02,085 --> 01:15:04,796
Bluey-green's always been
my favourite colour.

1311
01:15:05,756 --> 01:15:07,508
Is's very er...

1312
01:15:07,633 --> 01:15:09,301
Is's very nice, Joan.

1313
01:15:09,384 --> 01:15:11,386
And it's see-through.

1314
01:15:11,470 --> 01:15:15,224
Yeah, that reminds me,
I'm going to have to trim that hedge.

1315
01:15:16,183 --> 01:15:18,143
Ready for another one?

1316
01:15:18,268 --> 01:15:20,020
Not really.

1317
01:15:20,145 --> 01:15:24,107
I've really got to have a decent break
between each one or I'll injure myself.

1318
01:15:24,191 --> 01:15:26,276
I'll do a bit of crazy paving for an hour.

1319
01:15:26,401 --> 01:15:28,987
Sod, the crazy paving, I've got needs!

1320
01:15:29,112 --> 01:15:31,489
Joan, honestly, I'm drained.

1321
01:15:31,615 --> 01:15:33,575
I need to get some fresh air.

1322
01:15:34,535 --> 01:15:35,995
What about a quick shower?

1323
01:15:36,078 --> 01:15:37,538
No thanks!

1324
01:15:48,715 --> 01:15:50,175
Hello, chicken!

1325
01:15:50,259 --> 01:15:52,553
What are you doing?

1326
01:15:52,678 --> 01:15:56,098
Is's so you don't have to walk on t'grass.
Is's called crazy paving.

1327
01:15:56,223 --> 01:15:57,975
Is's funny-looking.

1328
01:15:58,100 --> 01:15:59,643
DAVE:
It's nice!

1329
01:16:00,602 --> 01:16:02,145
Ferris told me you were here.

1330
01:16:02,271 --> 01:16:04,356
He came rourd to see me

1331
01:16:04,439 --> 01:16:05,690
He's worried about you.

1332
01:16:05,816 --> 01:16:07,568
- Is he?
- Yeah

1333
01:16:07,693 --> 01:16:09,778
And he hates living at Tolly's place.

1334
01:16:09,862 --> 01:16:12,156
All them horrible smells...and rats.

1335
01:16:13,949 --> 01:16:15,409
He's got rats.

1336
01:16:15,492 --> 01:16:17,703
Could do with a bit of a clean-up,
that place.

1337
01:16:20,080 --> 01:16:22,708
If you come back,
I'm not standing for any nonsense.

1338
01:16:22,791 --> 01:16:24,668
I know.

1339
01:16:24,793 --> 01:16:28,213
You're a dad.
And that's what you've got to be.

1340
01:16:28,338 --> 01:16:31,049
Yeah, th-that's what I want to do.

1341
01:16:31,133 --> 01:16:32,509
And you've got to help me.

1342
01:16:32,593 --> 01:16:34,261
I will, I swear.

1343
01:16:35,429 --> 01:16:37,181
Come on, Katie.

1344
01:16:37,306 --> 01:16:39,266
We've got to go.

1345
01:16:46,064 --> 01:16:47,732
You coming?

1346
01:16:57,326 --> 01:16:59,286
SUPER PREACHERS: Hands Up

1347
01:17:05,334 --> 01:17:07,002
Hands up! Hands up!

1348
01:17:20,891 --> 01:17:23,477
I was about 13, I think. Late starter.

1349
01:17:23,602 --> 01:17:25,354
12. I was 12.

1350
01:17:25,479 --> 01:17:28,399
What about you, Tolly?
When did you have your first wank?

1351
01:17:28,482 --> 01:17:30,567
Oh, er... Half past seven.

1352
01:17:31,401 --> 01:17:34,237
Then another one about...quarter to nine.

1353
01:17:34,947 --> 01:17:36,532
Here's your film back, mate.

1354
01:17:36,615 --> 01:17:40,494
- What's that? Lord Of The Rings?
- No, Spunk Guzzlers Drenched In Piss.

1355
01:17:40,577 --> 01:17:41,828
Cheers.

1356
01:17:41,954 --> 01:17:44,123
FERRIS: Porn. You can't beat it.

1357
01:17:44,248 --> 01:17:48,085
They spend millions making normal films
with special effects and that.

1358
01:17:48,210 --> 01:17:52,673
I reckon 99% of people would rather watch
hardcore porn than any other type of film.

1359
01:17:52,798 --> 01:17:56,552
I think you're right. If you were on a
desert island and could only have one film,

1360
01:17:56,635 --> 01:17:59,555
you're not going to want
Return Of The Fucking Jedi, are you?

1361
01:17:59,680 --> 01:18:01,557
You want one with a bird in it

1362
01:18:01,640 --> 01:18:04,059
with a nice juicy fanny and
a big pair of tits.

1363
01:18:04,142 --> 01:18:05,602
Is's common sense, isn't it?

1364
01:18:05,727 --> 01:18:06,853
You know what I'd like?

1365
01:18:06,979 --> 01:18:09,690
I'd like to be able to detach my knob,
take it right off,

1366
01:18:09,773 --> 01:18:12,818
then I could get both ends
sucked at once.

1367
01:18:14,069 --> 01:18:17,281
I'd like to get a giant panda,
kill it, then fuck it.

1368
01:18:18,323 --> 01:18:20,325
Why do you want to do that?

1369
01:18:20,409 --> 01:18:22,912
Dave, if you don't kill it,
it's going to bite you!

1370
01:18:23,036 --> 01:18:25,330
They, like, maul you, pandas.

1371
01:18:26,456 --> 01:18:30,210
I think it's all that black-and-white fur
and that great big arse.

1372
01:18:32,212 --> 01:18:34,172
Has anyone seen my dog?

1373
01:18:36,800 --> 01:18:39,094
DEXY'S MIDNIGHT RUNNERS:
Come On, Eileen

1374
01:19:01,617 --> 01:19:02,743
Come on, Eileen

1375
01:19:10,792 --> 01:19:12,043
Come on, Eileen

1376
01:19:16,298 --> 01:19:19,843
Poor old Johnny Ray

1377
01:19:20,469 --> 01:19:22,680
Sounded sad upon the radio

1378
01:19:22,763 --> 01:19:25,391
Moved a million hearts in mono

1379
01:19:25,474 --> 01:19:29,019
Our mothers cried

1380
01:19:29,561 --> 01:19:31,938
And sang along, who'd blame them?

1381
01:19:34,149 --> 01:19:36,443
You're grown
You're grown up

1382
01:19:36,527 --> 01:19:38,612
So grown
So grown up

1383
01:19:38,737 --> 01:19:41,031
Now I must say more than ever

1384
01:19:42,366 --> 01:19:43,325
Come or Eileen

1385
01:19:43,408 --> 01:19:49,789
Toora loora, toora loo rye aye

1386
01:19:49,873 --> 01:19:55,712
We can sing just like our fathers

1387
01:19:55,838 --> 01:19:57,381
Come on, Eileen

1388
01:19:57,506 --> 01:19:59,466
Oh, I swear
Well he means

1389
01:19:59,591 --> 01:20:01,676
At this moment

1390
01:20:01,760 --> 01:20:04,054
You mean everything

1391
01:20:04,179 --> 01:20:05,931
With you in that dress

1392
01:20:06,056 --> 01:20:08,016
My thoughts I confess

1393
01:20:08,141 --> 01:20:10,226
Verge on dirty

1394
01:20:10,310 --> 01:20:12,938
Oh, come on, Eileen

1395
01:20:21,363 --> 01:20:22,823
Come on, Eileen

1396
01:20:26,577 --> 01:20:30,664
These people round here

1397
01:20:30,747 --> 01:20:33,375
Wear beaten-down eyes
sunk in smoke-dried faces

1398
01:20:33,458 --> 01:20:35,543
So resigned to what their fate is

1399
01:20:35,669 --> 01:20:37,629
But not us
No never.

1400
01:20:37,754 --> 01:20:40,048
No, not us
No never.

1401
01:20:40,132 --> 01:20:42,551
We are far too youg and clever

1402
01:20:43,385 --> 01:20:44,303
Remember

1403
01:20:44,428 --> 01:20:51,101
Go, toora loora, toora loo rye aye

1404
01:20:51,185 --> 01:20:56,941
Eileen, I'll hum this tune for ever

1405
01:20:57,024 --> 01:20:58,275
Come on, Eileen

1406
01:20:58,400 --> 01:21:00,569
Oh, I swear
Well he means

1407
01:21:00,694 --> 01:21:05,490
Oh, come on, let's take off everything

1408
01:21:05,574 --> 01:21:07,034
That pretty red dress

1409
01:21:07,159 --> 01:21:09,119
Eileen
Tell him yes

1410
01:21:09,244 --> 01:21:11,204
Oh, come on, let's

1411
01:21:11,330 --> 01:21:13,707
Oh, come on, Eileen

1412
01:21:13,832 --> 01:21:15,584
That pretty red dress

1413
01:21:15,709 --> 01:21:17,669
Eileen
Tell him yes

1414
01:21:17,794 --> 01:21:19,546
Oh, come on, let's

1415
01:21:19,671 --> 01:21:24,759
Oh, come on, Eileen, please

1416
01:21:25,719 --> 01:21:29,765
Come or Eileen too loo rye aye

1417
01:21:30,182 --> 01:21:33,727
Come or Eileen too loo rye aye

1418
01:21:33,852 --> 01:21:35,604
Now you are grown
Toora

1419
01:21:35,729 --> 01:21:38,106
Now you have shown
Toora too loora

1420
01:21:38,232 --> 01:21:41,444
Oh, Eileen

1421
01:21:41,568 --> 01:21:46,031
Said, you're grown
Come or Eileen too loo rye aye

1422
01:21:46,156 --> 01:21:49,493
So grown
Come or Eileen too loo rye aye

1423
01:21:49,576 --> 01:21:52,704
Now I must say more than ever
Toora toora too loora

1424
01:21:52,829 --> 01:21:54,789
Things round here will change

1425
01:21:54,915 --> 01:21:57,918
I said, toora loora
Come on Eileen too loo rye aye

1426
01:21:58,043 --> 01:22:00,546
Toora loo rye aye
Come or Eileen too loo rye aye

1427
01:22:00,629 --> 01:22:02,506
Toora toora too loora

1428
01:22:04,091 --> 01:22:05,634
Come on, Eileen

1429
01:22:05,759 --> 01:22:07,719
Oh, I swear
Well he means

1430
01:22:07,845 --> 01:22:09,597
At this moment

1431
01:22:09,721 --> 01:22:11,806
You mean everything

1432
01:22:11,890 --> 01:22:13,683
With you in that dress

1433
01:22:13,767 --> 01:22:15,644
My thoughts I confess

1434
01:22:15,769 --> 01:22:17,521
Verge on dirty

1435
01:22:17,646 --> 01:22:20,357
Oh, come on, Eileen

1436
01:22:20,440 --> 01:22:22,025
Come on, Eileen