( sniffles )
( inhaling erratically )
( sneezes )
Wake up.
( crowing )
Captioning sponsored by PARAMOUNT PICTURES
( birds singing; animals chittering )
( rhythmic percussion playing; native chanting )
( bird squawks )
TOMMY: Come along, faithful viewers,
on our journey through the drainforest
as we search for that very unusable creature,
the three-toed sloth.
( snoring )
Ah, there he is!
Teething with life.
Let's get a closer look, shall we?
CHUCKIE: Oh, no, you don't!
Cut! Cut!
Don't worry, Chuckie.
I'm Nigel Strawberry, wild aminal expert.
( roaring )
And 'cause I'm an eggsbert, I say,
everybody into the truck!
( whimpering )
Go, go, go.
Jump Tommy, jump!
Say something, Nigel.
I can hear the tiger's running feets,
( roaring ) see his sharp teeths,
and oh, oh... I feel a cool breeze.
( whimpering )
( gasping )
( shouting )
( screaming )
Croca-gator!
( whimpering )
( screaming )
Not to worry, guys!
( squeaking )
( squeak )
( squeaking )
( panting )
KIMI: Oh, no! It's coming back!
But that was my onliest cute toy!
( honks horn ) Then feed him Phil.
I heard that.
That way! Through the swamp!
( panting and gasping )
( grunting )
Nigel, why are we sinking?
Quitsand! I should have knowed!
Guys, hang on to me!
( grunting )
( screaming )
( roaring )
( cat meowing )
What are you diaperbags screaming about?
CHUCKIE: We're about to get eated
by that ferocious Siferean tiger.
Were you pretending to be Nigel Strawberry
again, Tommy?
Yeah. He's my hero,
and when I grow up, I want to be just like him.
Pickles, you're no Nigel Strawberry.
You're not even a Nigel... ( blows raspberry )
...Raspberry!
You're never gonna have real adventures.
You're just a backyard baby with a diaper full of dreams.
( laughs )
Wow. She's mean.
Now, who wants to go look for cookies under stuff?
I do!
Okay, come on. Follow me.
( laughter )
( toy squeaking ) ( snoring )
( growling )
( sniffling )
NIGEL ( on TV ): The panthera onca,
commonly known as the jaguar, seems determined
to feast on my nether regions.
But not to worry.
( grunting )
Well, faithful viewers,
our journey was a smashing success.
( grunting )
( water splashing )
Until next time, this is Sir Nigel Thornberry
of Sir Nigel Thornberry's Animal World.
Back! Back! Back!
Why, hello, Scout.
Boy, rest your eyes for a second,
at old Thornberry's gator bait.
Hey.
( chuckles )
Boy, that Sir Nigel gets in some real scrapes
out there in the wild, but he always manages
to wiggle out of trouble somehow.
( grunting )
Oh, and, Jonathan, don't think
that just because I'm on a Luxury Lipschitz Cruise
in the South China Seas,
( heavy sigh ) I won't be checking messages,
E-mail, and carrier pigeons on the hour.
Honey, I thought we were going to leave work behind
for seven fun-filled days.
Silly, it's not all work.
I've signed up for every spa treatment
culminating in the Salem Retreat,
where you're pressed between layers of hot rocks
( laughing ) and ripe cranberries.
Sounds bewitching.
But aren't we all going to be busy
with our children?
Deed, that's what the Kidsatorium is for.
Each morning we drop off the pups
and head for the All-Day Breakfast Buffet.
I hear they make a mean egg yolk omelet...
Ooh! ( giggling )
...dipped with five kinds of sausage.
( gobbling )
Whoa!
( laughing )
KIRA: We signed up the kids
for "Pirate Play and Pillage" class.
It teaches tolerance for the peg-legged.
Well, I'm going to use the whole seven kid-free days
to reshape my physique.
( grunts ) BETTY: Could happen.
The Earth was created in six.
( yelling )
( clattering )
( grunting )
Everyone all set?
I think we all should thank my husband Stu
for arranging this wonderful getaway.
No. You can thank me
by having the time of your lives.
* Holiday
LIPSCHITZ ( over PA ): Welcome!
Bienvenue! Willkommen!
Welcome aboard
the world renowned Dr. Lipschitz's Cruise!
( applause and cheering ) * Celebrate
* Holiday... DIDI: Stu must have taken Spike
for one last potty run.
I-I'm sure he'll be right back.
He better.
He's got all our tickets.
That sure is a nice cambera, Susie.
Thanks, Tommy.
My mommy got it for me
so she can see everything she's missing.
How come she and your daddy can't come
on the cruise with us?
Well, my mommy's getting a special award
'cause she 'scovered a new disease,
and my daddy's cutting the ribbon
at the Dummi Bear Theme Park opening.
But I wanted to come with you guys.
ANGELICA: And we're
so glad you did, Susie Carmichael.
Hold the spotlight on Lounge Singer Cynthia.
( grunts )
* Dresses and shoes are the only things *
( whimpering ) * That I'll share...
That's my rules.
Oh! I wonder if it's too late
to call my mommy.
( boat horn blares )
Hey, The ship's sailing without us!
Wait!
( baby giggling )
Isn't that our ship?
( romantic jazz plays softly )
( clink )
Whoa!
( boat horn tooting )
STU: Ahoy, mates!
Captain Stu
at your service!
Climb aboard for seven
fun-filled days on the S.S. Nancy.
No fancy packaged tour.
Just the thrill
of the open sea, the smell of the salt air,
and the joy of close friends
and family.
Drew, hold the shoes.
( boat horn blowing )
I'm Queen of the World!
( laughter and chatter )
Oh, isn't this a great vacation, guys?
SUSIE: As long as
the "Queen" doesn't sing...
I'm happy.
And the bestest part is, we're all togethers.
( screaming and laughing )
Ah! This is just like my bathie.
Only there's no rubber ducky, and...
I'm not nakie.
There's a ducky.
( screeching )
Well, okay.
Time to get nakie.
Oh.
Nakie!
( laughter )
( groans )
( inhales )
( sighs )
I can't believe
you did this without consulting us, Stu.
Look at poor Kira.
This was supposed to be our honeymoon.
( vomits )
STU: Sorry, Chas.
And here I was hoping you'd be my first mate.
Me? Really?
Snap out of it, Gilligan.
At the next port,
we're getting off this rinky-dink tub,
and getting on the Lipschitz Cruise.
( sighs )
STU: Don't you see?
on a cruise right now, we wouldn't be together.
We'd be split up between the pools, the spas,
and the mile-long buffets.
( gasps )
We're missing Canadian Bacon Tuesday!
Oh, can't this bait trap go any faster?
( engine rumbling )
Hello? Hello?
LIPSCHITZ ( over radio ): Welcome passengers to what I like to call
"The Voyage of Your Lifetime!"
Everybody, I'm getting a signal.
It's from the Lipschitz Cruise.
Oh, quick, let me talk to them.
DEBBIE: Mom, are you there? ( Donnie chittering )
We're having a little trouble with the wild child.
Sounds like a disgruntled passenger.
Oh! Hello, Lipschitz. Charlotte Pickles here.
Could you send a rescue boat right away?
We're the squalid little boat in the middle of the ocean.
HOWARD: My muscles are atrophying as we speak.
DREW: Well, we paid for spa treatments,
and I'm not missing one!
Hey, we're getting a signal here.
DIDI: Oh, Dr. Lipschitz, can you help us?
CHAS: My wife really needs to see the ship's doctor.
DEBBIE: Huh? Hang on a sec, Mom.
I'm picking up some lame-o soap opera.
What is it this time, Debbie?
Okay.
I made everyone dinner,
so I shouldn't have to clean up, too,
Mom, all she did was hand us a jar of peanut butter.
Uh, can we talk about this when your father and I get home?
Yeah. Any E.T.A. on that?
'Cause you've been gone since, like, yesterday.
We're still looking for the leopard at...
Oh, Nigel!
Over there! What's that?
That's... I see spots!
Watch out for that limb, dearest.
Here, neofelis nebulosa,
come to Papa.
DEBBIE: Hello? I was talking here!
Oh, I'm sorry, Debbie.
Now you're on your own for dinner tonight.
You know, normal families
eat dinner together once in a while.
NIGEL: Marianne, perhaps I can lure out the leopard
by imitating its mating call.
( low-pitched growling )
( sighs )
Okay, so we're not normal.
But as a teen, I reserve the right
to alternately reject and embrace my parental units.
MARIANNE: Consider us embraced.
Now, keep an eye on Donnie.
It's going to rain,
and you know how he likes mud.
( chittering )
( scoffs ): She totally hung up on me.
And I was having a sensitive moment.
Debbie, you are so self-centered.
( scoffs ): I am not!
( loud chattering )
Okay, what's the monkey saying about me?
( sniffs )
( sighs )
Mmm.
( thunder crashes )
( shrieking )
( thunder crashing )
Oh, that's great.
Oh, it's fine!
Come on, pups,
get underneath. Come on.
( squeaking )
( kids giggle )
BETTY: Come on, move it, move it, move it! Down below!
Oh!
( whimpers )
Captain Stu,
I can't hold the wheel.
Will you stop calling him captain?
He has no idea what he's doing!
I do so!
Does anybody know where the brakes are
on this thing?
Jonathan, why aren't you answering the phone?
I need you to divert a tropical storm.
( gasps )
It's a 40-foot wall of water.
We're going to need a bigger boat.
Everyone get below!
( barking )
( screaming )
( grunts )
( Charlotte screams )
Phone overboard! ( grunts )
Phone overboard!
Charlotte, forget the phone!
Jonathan!
( creaking )
( rattling )
( giggling )
Well, this is how we came in...
ALL: No!
( grunts )
( all screaming )
BETTY: Oh, babies!
Oh, Kimi.
Chuckie, hold on to me.
Why didn't anybody stop me?
Out of my way!
STU: Where you going?
No, Charlotte!
Charlotte, don't. I-It's a rental.
Come on!
Right behind you, boys!
If you like to make a call, please hang up and try again.
If you need help, hang up...
( gasps )
You're safe! ( all exclaim )
I got it!
Dil's binky!
Oh, Betty, thank you.
I thought this might come in handy, too.
Abandon ship!
I can't help feeling partially responsible.
( thunder rumbles )
( tinny melody plays )
( sobbing )
* There's got to be a morning after *
* If we can hold on through the night... *
I know we can.
* We have a chance to find the sunshine... *
* Let's keep on looking for the light *
( barking )
STU: Spike!
Here, boy!
ALL: Spike!
CHAS: Come over here, Spike.
( barks )
Cynthia
overboard!
Cynthia! No!
( sobbing ): No, no, no, no.
There, there, Princess.
We've all lost something today.
Why, I lost my cell phone with 100 free minutes,
and Daddy lost his favorite sun visor,
and Uncle Stu lost all our respect.
( Spike groans )
( snoring )
( gasps )
Cynthia!
( coughing ) You guys, wake up!
We're at the bacation place.
Ah, that was a good nappie.
It was just like when Mommy
used to rock us to beddie-bye.
Well, I likes a bed
that doesn't move. ( barks )
( grunts )
( gurgling )
Land ho!
I'll never set foot on water again!
Where are we?
Oh, isn't it obvious?
The palm trees, the white sand,
the crystal blue water...
Why, we've landed on an island resort.
Place looks pretty deserted.
Oh, Betty.
The best ones always are.
Just look for a cabana boy carrying towels.
I could use a double espresso, chop-chop.
( echoing ): Chop-chop... Don't worry,
I've got a map.
We'll figure this out.
We left here. We capsized here.
I know exactly where we are.
See? We're on this tiny little island called...
"Uninhabited."
You mean we're the only people here?
Well, we'll just have to get back in the boat and row to another island.
One with coffee.
( gasps ): Drew, the lifeboat's gone!
Gone?! DIDI: Where'd it go?
Look, it's way out there.
DREW: Wait, ho, ho, oh, great.
HOWARD: We're marooned?
With no food?
How soon before we all turn cannibal?
I have to get out of here!
( screaming )
So, "Swiss Family DeVille" he's not.
NIGEL: Good morning, poodles!
( grunts ) ( sighs ): We were up all night
looking for that leopard.
Debbie, they're here!
DEBBIE: Ta da!
Homemade coconut muffins and fresh herbal tea.
Debbie, this is so sweet.
Oh, and these look heavenly.
Afraid we must eat and run.
Mmm.
Ooh, really delicious, honey.
But you guys just got here!
( sighs ): I know, but the Foundation
is expecting that footage today,
and we still haven't got it.
( sighs ): Nigel, I think we should split up.
Dearest!
I thought we were so happy.
Oh...
You mean to look
for the leopard, don't you?
I can't believe this!
You're always working.
When's the last time we took a vacation?
But, Debbie, we travel all over the world.
I want a family vacation.
You know, where we fight over the bar of hotel soap.
And Debbie hogs all the good towels?
And we order room service.
And we do dorky family activities?
Yes! Dorky sounds really good right now.
Well, girls, I'm sorry.
I didn't realize you felt this strongly.
I promise, as soon as we find the leopard,
we'll do dorky family activities.
NIGEL: It's settled then.
( gasps )
You're leaving, too? Mm-hmm.
I was just going to hang out on the beach today anyway.
Debbie, are you forgetting that I talk to animals?
Sadly, no. Your point?
I'm going to find out where that leopard is so we can leave,
and maybe we'll really take a vacation.
Come on, Darwin.
( chattering )
Darwin's staying here.
See ya.
( speaking gibberish )
( gasps )
( screams ): Donnie!
I did not slave over a hot oven
to feed the birds!
( bird chirping )
( sighs )
When I write about my life--
and I will--
I will not be kind.
Okeydoke, kids.
You play here, while the mommies and daddies
try to ward off the specter of doom.
Babies, listen up.
We're stucked on a topical island ( babies groaning )
that don't gots no people on it.
But we're here, Angelica.
I mean people who matter.
And we gots no food.
And no cookies!
You don't know what you're talking about,
Angelica.
Oh, yeah?
I saw a movie 'bout it once.
These little kids were all alone
on an island til. they growed up
and turned wild. ( whimpers )
The boy grew a beard down to his feet,
and they had to wear rags for clothes.
( gasping )
That's not the worstest part.
* This isn't like
* Our park back home
* With slides and pools and swings *
* It's a creepy little island
* With great big scary things
* Where mutant lobsters crawl around *
* Chomping on little kids
* And water wings can't save you *
* From the slimy, squishy squids *
* That's why you need
* A princess-- someone beautiful, hmm? *
* Like me-- to save you from the scary claws *
* That grab you from the tree
* So if you don't wanna end up *
* Being mutant lobster food
* Then keep your Island Princess *
* In a really happy mood
* That means no blowing bubbles *
* That means no making smells
* That means no bugging me
* To wear my royal shells, ha!
* Just do the things I tell you *
* Like bow when I walk by
* Listen when I speak to you
* But don't look me in the eye
SUSIE: * You're not some Island Princess *
* There's not a squishy squid
* There are no mutant lobsters
* That would ever eat a kid
* Don't listen to her stories
* She always misbehaves
* She's trying to scare you babies *
* Into being Island Slaves
ANGELICA: * Why do you always have to be so good and nice and cheeky? *
* Just face the facts
* That I'm this Island Princess Angeli-tiki *
* So if you don't wanna end up being mutant lobster food *
* Then keep your Island Princess *
* In a really happy mood
* Keep your Island Princess
* In a really happy mood.
Yeah!
It's obvious.
The first thing to do
is make a signal fire.
You know what else is obvious?
You're an idiot.
We have to find something to eat.
All I saved was a couple jars
of baby food.
I never knew strained peas and apricots
went so well together.
Oh, you ate the baby food?!
Babies don't need food.
I have to keep my strength up
for when you try to throw me into the soup pot!
He's delusional.
This is all your fault!
Whose idea was the Stu Cruise to Doom?
Oh, I would expect that
from the Finsters or the DeVilles,
but Charlotte!
I knew this day was coming
since you were in diapers!
I should have never left Paris!
( loud arguing )
( argument continues )
This is the Circle of Chaos.
If we're going to survive on this island,
we can't ever step foot in the Circle of Chaos.
Wow. I feel calmer already.
We don't know when we'll get off this island.
Until we do, we're gonna need order.
First thing we need is a leader.
Any volunteers?
Stu, put down your hand.
I nominate Betty.
I accept.
All in favor of me, raise your hand.
You're all going to blindly follow Betty
just because she drew a circle in the sand?
OTHERS: Yes!
Thank you.
As my first duty
as your rightfully
elected leader, I'm assigning Stu to baby watch.
The rest of yez, follow me.
Geez, all I wanted to do was have a little adventure.
Now everyone and their brother is blaming me for this mess.
Angelica, are the growed- ups mad at my daddy?
That's a blunderstatement.
He's in big trouble.
It's 'cause of him we're going to have to live here forever.
Maybe we can help.
( chortling )
You babies are gonna help?
You can't keep your fingers
out of your nose.
We gots to try, Angelica.
Guys, up that hill.
I think it's the drainforest,
just like we sawed on Nigel Strawberry's TV show!
Does that mean Nigel Strawberry's here?
What makes you think that big-nosed nature guy's
on thi dinky island?
Because that's the lastest place we saw him.
He was getting eated by a crockagator.
'Member?
Nice knowing you, Chuckie.
I bet if we go in there, we'll find Nigel Strawberry.
He can help us get home!
And no one would be mad at your daddy no more!
And I wouldn't have to share the waffle I gots in my diapie.
( high-pitched ): Philip.
Uh, if I had a waffle in my diapie.
( nervous chuckle )
See you, Angelica.
Hey, get back here.
You babies better listen to me,
or else!
( echoing ): Or else...
I'm going to build a signal fire
that will have us off this island in no time.
Uh, let's see.
Gum, my special "writes-upside-down" pen
and disposable razor.
Great. I can chew, shave, and write about it.
On my head.
I can't believe it, Cynthia.
Those babies always do whatever I say!
What's all this junk?
It's not junk, Angelica.
These everyday items can be used
to make a lot of things.
That's it!
I'll build a radio and send a distress signal!
Angelica, keep an eye on the babies for me, okay?
I'm supposed to baby-sit those half-pipes?
That's dog's work!
( snoring )
Spike! Wake up!
Watch the babies.
I got important things to do,
like find someone to be my royal subjects.
Now, go!
* Bow-wow-wow, yippee-yo-yippee-yay *
* Bow-wow, yippee-yo, yippee-yay *
* I'm that dog...
( sneezing )
* Ain't your average Huckleberry Hound *
* Why must I feel like that?
* I have my pride, chase the cat... *
Cynthia, this vacation stinks!
I've been walking forever,
and no one's come along to carry me yet!
Hey, that bird's got a cupcake!
Drop it, beak-head!
( frustrated growling and grunting )
( screaming )
( grunting )
There's got to be someone around here I can boss.
( Darwin chattering )
Ew! Ah...!
Listen up, monkey.
All that chimp chatter really bugs.
Just hand over those munchies and keep painting.
( grumbling chatter )
Wow! She's got that monkey
waiting on her hoof and mouth.
Cynthia, I could learn a lot from that girl.
Excuse me, Miss Bossy Lady?
( anxious chattering )
Pipe down, monkey.
Hey, lady!
Who's calling me a lady?
I'm a teen!
Where did you come from?
This is supposed to be a deserted island.
I'm Angeli-tiki, the island princess.
And I'm thirsty.
And I lost my touch for being bossy,
so you got to teach me.
No ice cubes next time.
( demented chattering )
TOMMY: There's the drainforest, guys!
Bet we'll find Nigel Strawberry down there.
KIMI: Now you're talking, Tommy!
Wait up! Wait for me!
* This place is different than our own backyard *
* I hope we haven't gone too far *
* We're somewheres new and we haven't a clue *
* I just saw that butterfly turn blue *
* This is a strange and mysterious place *
* With lots of yummy buggies for us to chase *
* We're walking and we don't know where *
* Ooh-wee, it's a jungle out here *
* This place is really neat
* Lots of wormies for us to eat *
* Lots of furry things everywhere you stare *
* Feels like I got some in my underwear *
* Monkeys swinging all around
* I wonder if we're ever going to get found *
* We're having lots of fun, hey, look over there... *
Whoopie! Oh, boy! yay!
* Great big snake hanging from a tree *
* I hopes that it don't eat up me *
* Fat green lizard looking me in the eye *
* I sure am glad that I'm not that fly *
* Prettiful birdies singing a song, tweet tweet *
* I hope we don't stay here for long *
* We gots a job to do, and we're headed up there *
* Look sharp, it's a jungle out here *
* We gots a job to do, and we're headed up there *
* Ooh-wee, it's a jungle out here. *
( grunting and panting )
Wow! It's got
a gazillion feets.
Well, down the hatch.
LIL: Philip, no!
Oh, sorry.
Want a bite?
No! I don't think we should eat bugs
no more.
That's crazy talk, Lil.
We've been raised on bugs.
I know it, Philip,
but that's afore I sawed that poor fly
get eated by that big mean ol' flower.
Now, you let him go!
If I knowed the last bug I eated would be the last bug I eated,
I would've eated it slower.
Look! Growed-up feetprints!
I bet they're Nigel Strawberry's!
Let's go!
You know, it's lots easier going potty in the drainforest
than at home.
And you don't have to worry
'bout getting any on the floor or the walls or anything.
Guys? Uh...
Wait up!
Uh, uh, guys?
Excuse me, I'm looking for a clouded leopard.
Have you seen any around?
Sure. There's one at the...
Eliza!
( grunting and yelling )
You'll never believe what I just saw!
There's a little girl at camp, and she's a miniature Debbie!
In every way.
She's bossy, she's loud...
she's hideous!
Darwin, look!
DARWIN: A dog?
What's he doing here?
Oh, spreading his fleas on an unsuspecting world.
( shuddering groan )
Come on.
( startled bark ): Hey, hey, hey.
Could you give a dog a little warning?
I'm trying to do my business here.
( uneasy chuckling ): You know, it's funny.
For a minute there
I thought I actually heard you talking to me.
You talking to me?
Are you talking to me?
Yeah, I can talk to animals.
It's a long story.
Should we come back?
Ah, no problem; I'm done.
I was just marking.
Spike was here!
Uh, sorry. I know... Where are my manners?
Full name: Down Spike! Down! Get Off That Couch!
I'm Eliza,
and this is Darwin.
( Spike sniffling and snorting )
( sneezing )
Spike was here, too.
Wow! I've been sneezing all day.
My sniffer's on the blink.
I can't even smell my own butt.
And let me tell you,
I've tried.
Charmed.
Spike, what are you doing here?
Well... I'm...
To be honest with you, I'm looking for my babies.
You lost your babies?
Probably too busy drinking from the toilet.
I was not! I was sleeping.
That was my second guess.
Hey, hey, smart boy, you don't get it, okay?
This is how it works.
Usually they wander off, I find them, no problem.
But I can't smell.
I might as well not even call myself a dog.
Don't worry,
Spike.
We'll help you find them.
And I won't tell anyone you lost them.
Really? You really will help me find them?
Thank you! That is so nice.
( giggling )
Wow, you taste pretty good.
Animals.
Tommy? Phil? Lil?
Spike?
( squawking )
( yelling )
( yelling and grunting )
Aw...
I knew we shoulda stayed at the beach.
( singing nervously ): * This is the way we wash our clothes *
* Wash our clothes, wash our clothes *
* This is the way we wash our clothes *
* So early in the morning.
( gasping ) ( animal croaks )
Phil?
Lillian!
This is not funny!
( yells )
Oh, you're just my 'flection!
How ya doin', Chuckie?
( speaking gibberish )
Uh, my 'flection never talked back!
I been ascared of lots of stuff 'afore,
but I never been ascared of me!
Hey! Where'd it go?
Um, Chuckie?
That's not very nice.
I'm not gonna make funny faces with you no mores!
( Donnie chittering )
( Donnie shouts ) ( grunts )
Hey! Who's throwing stuff?
( grunting )
My shorts feel kinda big...
Aah! Who took my shoeses?
( Donnie speaking gibberish )
( frantic gibbering )
( groans )
( excited gibbering )
( yelling )
My big-boy pants aren't 'posed to do this!
Oh!
I don't even look like Chuckie no mores.
( bird twittering )
( muffled whistling )
( gasps )
Phillip!
No! We don't do that no more!
Aw, just one little wormie, Lil!
Don't you 'member how good they used to taste?
How they tickled on the way down?
No, I don't!
I told you I'm a vegebelatarian now.
( gasps )
We don't eat bugs. We pet 'em.
I don't knows you anymore, Lil.
Do you...
do you still like to eat mud?
Not if it has a face.
But you're my twin!
Who's gonna 'splain Mommy's jokes to me
or-or help me plant my booger farm?
And who's gonna tell me when my feet smell?
Okay, Dil.
Do your stuff.
( sniffs )
Eeew! Tinky!
( slurping )
Guys, I haven't seen Chuckie for a long time.
We better go back.
You know how scared Chuckie is of being losted.
Chubby!
( excited gibbering )
( gibbering )
Is everything okay, Chuckie?
( gibbering )
When did Chuckie start talking backwards?
( bird singing )
Not a hair,
not a paw print,
not even a dropping!
Must keep my chin up.
I'll find that cat
or my name's not Nigel Archibald Thornberry.
I'll find that big-nosed nature guy,
or my name's not Tommy Awfully Bald Pickles!
( gibbering )
Donnie?
Is that you?
Look, it's Nigel Strawberry!
We founded him! ( cheering )
Great good all, a gaggle of babies!
Children!
Stay right there!
I'm coming down!
( yelling )
( grunting )
Not the way I intended.
( grunting )
( thud )
Heavens, what a fall.
I must get to those babies.
( falling object whistling )
( thunk )
( wheezes )
( thud )
( echoing ): Are you okay, Mr. Strawberry?
( groaning ): She called me "mister!"
Silly Billy.
I'm only this many years old!
Do any of you remember
where I left my tricycle?
( laughing )
( yelling )
PHIL: That's one old three-year old.
Uh, no, Mr. Strawberry.
We're shipwrecked on this island.
We was hoping you could help Tommy's daddy.
Watch what I can do.
( babbling ) Spinning?
I think Nigel Strawberry's acting kinda funny.
Maybe he's got diapie rash.
Oh, yeah!
Wee! Wee!
( birds twittering )
( sniffing )
Did you catch a whiff of anything yet?
It's, look, it-it-it, it's kind of a damp smell
that's a cross between sour milk and poop.
Well, actually I kind of like it.
but everything smells pretty much the same to me.
Ha! Humans.
How do you live?
And who put the "poo" in pooch?
( tinkling )
( growling )
Okay, there you go. Look at yourself now.
All right, you got a little dog pee on you.
( gasping ): Oh, my gosh! You're the..
I am Siri, the clouded leopard.
I'm Spike, the purebred mutt!
See these claws?
Sniff my butt!
ELIZA: Spike,
why'd you say that?
I was being social.
Of course, a simple handshake wouldn't do.
Hey, twitchy, I do not shake with cats, okay?
Now... a small chimp for breakfast,
a mutt for lunch,
and a sensible girl for dinner.
Hey, chimpboy, will you stop worrying?
I know all about cats
with a capital K.
Sit on a windowsill, hack up a fur ball.
Ooh, that's very ferocious.
Spike, this isn't your regular house cat.
They all twitch their whiskers
one whisker at a time, just like you and me.
( growls )
( groans )
* Don't go and be fooled
* By those fancy pants
* It's just her feline arrogance *
* Flaunting their collars with tinkly bells *
* She thinks her litter box don't smell *
Whoa, hey, who cut the cheese?
Was that you, baby?
You may want to reexamine your diet.
* Can the old canine philosophies *
( sneezes )
* Why don't you just go and tend to your fleas *
* Don't push me, mutt
* I'm just not in the mood
* You're one swipe away from becoming cat food *
* Don't go and be fooled by this crazy cat *
* Don't go and listen to his crazy facts *
* Not gonna tell you twice, you better watch your back *
* Don't go and be fooled
* The big bad cat's a fur-ball-hacking *
* Rodent-snacking act
That's right, an act.
You're just a pussycat.
You think you're tough?
* I dare you, Spike, to call my bluff *
You're a very scawy puddytat.
* You're one swipe away from becoming toast *
Eliza, get my doggy bag. I'm about to catch a snack.
We can settle this right now, right here--
mano a mano, dogo a cato.
Ow! That has gotta hurt--
falling off a cliff into a sticker bush.
* Not gonna tell you twice, you better watch your back *
Oh! Here I am. Come get me.
( snickering )
You think I'm afraid of your claws?
Coochie-coochie-coo.
Bombs away, ladies.
Come on, me and you. Come on, let's go right now.
I'll rip that fur coat off ya
and wear it,
and all my dog friends will be going,
"Spike, where did you get that skanky cat coat?"
( laughs )
( roaring )
You hear what I'm saying, red?
( growls )
( wimpering ) I thought cats
didn't like water. ( growls )
But frankly, Eliza,
she did need a bath... Come on, come on.
Oh! Whoa!
Aw, what happened?
I'm outta here, I gotta go find my babies.
Helpless offspring?
Yeah! Yeah! That's it. That's it.
Have you seen 'em? Little ones, walk on two feet?
Last time I saw 'em, they were on the beach.
Walking...
stumbling, actually.
Two feet?
Yeah, they're my human babies.
( growls )
I thought we were looking for puppies!
No, no. My pups are home with the wife.
She can't travel.
Delicate stomach.
Me, I could eat anything--
shoes, furniture, pencils
with the little erasers.
I ate one of Chuckie's diapers one time
Spike... and let me tell you...
Spike! that is spicy.
Spike! We have to find those babies before Siri does!
Come on!
( gasps )
When will I think before I bark?
( barking )
Spike, is that you?
Tommy? Kimi?
Anybody?!
( screeching )
Oh, no, not monkeys!
( whimpering )
( gasps )
Hey, they're chasing that little one!
That's not very nice.
Now, you big monkeys go 'way.
You was little monkeys yourselfs once...
So just go away and leave this little monkey 'lone.
Shoo! Shoo!
( chittering softly )
Thanks.
Wow! I saveded someone 'stead of someone saving me.
I must be a wild boy now.
( barking )
ELIZA ( echoing ): Babies!
Tommy!
Susie!
Oh, my dogness!
What if I never feel their sticky jammy fingers
poking in my ears again?
What if I never find a floating diaper in my doggie bowl?
What if...
Spike! Snap out of it!
Right, right, right, right.
Not helping. Not helping.
Focus, focus, Spike.
What does "focus" mean?
Right, right.
But who's going to sneak me donuts?
Come on, we're almost there.
( sobbing )
( chewing )
ANGELICA: These are much better
than the cookies we gots back at the grass hut,
and I don't have to share with no dumb babies.
I mean, um, dumb baby savages.
Tell me about it.
I have to share with a pigtailed weirdo,
a jungle freak, and a monkey in a tank top.
( burps )
Uh, refill.
Why do I have to get it?
You said you wanted to learn
how to be bossy, right?
This is how you learn.
Extra ice, two straws.
( chuckles )
I would trade the monkey for her any day.
MARIANNE: Debbie, come in. Over.
Hey, Mom, how's it going?
It's not going at all.
Have you heard from your father?
No, but get this, Mom.
Tell me later, honey. Be back soon.
Angeli-tiki is nobody's lackey.
( beeping )
Hey, lady!
What's that bubble thing?
A bathysphere.
It goes underwater.
You know, like a submarine.
Getting thirsty here!
That girl's even bossier than me.
( gasps )
Those dumb babies
are practically on top of a mountain,
and I'm gonna be blamed!
I gotta go home and pretend I'm innocent.
Um, Debbie?
I was supposed to be home for, uh, the Island Sacrifice.
Okay, my mom will drive you when she gets here.
But I have to go now.
I'm the princess.
Who do you think's going to throw in the goat?
Oh, it's a native thing.
Oh, Mom will understand.
But I am not waiting around to watch the goat bite it.
( engine starts )
Is that a CD player?
Yeah, only the best.
You know an awful lot for an "island girl."
Um, well, see, a TV washed up on the beach once
and the island king made the whole tribe watch it.
( The Clash's "Should I Stay or Should I Go" plays )
I love this song!
Hey, me, too.
( picking guitar )
( tires squealing )
BOTH: Woo!
( singing with CD ): * Darling you've got to let me know *
* Should I stay or should I go
( honking )
* If you say that you are mine *
* I'll be here till the end of time *
( tires squealing )
* So you've got to let me know
* Should I stay or should I go? *
BOTH: Yow!
* It's always tease...
Whoa!
( tires squealing )
Whoa!
Debbie, there's a bunch of a babies lost around here,
and the leopard's after them!
I didn't know there was a leopard out there.
I'm gonna be
in big trouble.
Get back here and put your seat belt on.
( grunts )
C'mon, Cynthia. We're taking a ride!
( gasps )
Angeli-tiki!
( alarm sounding )
( gasps )
Oh, man.
( beeping )
( buzzing )
( flare whistling )
( oohing and awing )
* Twinkle, twinkle,
* Little star... *
( gasping )
Debbie, what happened?
I was taking care of this island princess and...
ELIZA: What's she doing in the bathysphere?
DEBBIE: I didn't say
I was taking care of her well.
ANGELICA: Where are the lights on this thing?
( screaming )
( glass squeaks )
I'm a kangaroo.
Hoppity, hoppity, hop.
I'm a froggie,
and I'm frogging.
All this hopping is making my diapie creep.
Ooh...
Now I'm a giant kitty cat,
with lots
of pointy toothies!
( gasping )
Nigel Strawberry plays with wild aminals all the time.
He'll get us out of this scrape.
Does kitty want a mousie?
Does kitty want to dress up in dolly clothes and take a ride
in Nanny's pram?
( gasps and groans )
Kitty gave me a boo-boo.
( kids whimpering )
Nice kitty.
( Donnie yelling )
Chuckie, be careful!
He's so brave.
Or dumb.
( speaking gibberish )
( growling )
( screeching )
( shouts )
( cheering )
Hey, I been looking all over for you.
I don't like being half nakie.
I want my clothses back.
Hey, I got sticks in my hair!
I gots no shoeses!
Oh, ouch, my feet!
( speaking gibberish )
That's better.
Now I can see.
( screaming )
( roaring )
( yelling )
( "Frustrated Unnoticed" by Damone plays )
* I'm rockin' a BMX bike
* I'm rockin' a musclehead car
* I freestyle where ever I go, whoa *
* I don't cry whenever I fall
( growling )
( screaming )
Whoa!
( screaming )
* And I can run as fast as anyone I know *
* My heart is strong
* I'll be the one who takes control. *
( screaming )
( grunting )
( yelling )
Look, Mumsy, I'm a whale.
You sure he can really help us, Tommy?
Of course, Susie.
He's Nigel Strawberry.
He's, um, the bestest nature 'splorerer ever.
Or... I thought he was.
LIL: Guess we're stucked here till somebody finds us.
KIMI: Who's going to find us in here?
PHIL: I know what'll cheer
everybody up.
A nice waffle.
It's kind of crusty.
You sure you don't gots any mable syrup in there?
Nope. But I got some ketchup.
NIGEL: Watch this one.
What 'dat?
What 'dat?!
( pops )
Maybe TV people are only good at doing stuffs on TV.
Well, I guess we'll be living on this island from now on.
That means...
I might not see my family again for a long time.
( crying )
Uh, you gonna eat that waffle?
Shh, Phillip. Susie's sad.
I'm sad, too.
I want my mommy and daddy.
Me, too.
( crying )
I'm sorry, guys.
I never shoulda broughted you here.
Angelica was right.
I am just a backyard baby with a diapie full of dreams.
SUSIE: No, you're not.
Tommy, you took us through the drainforest all by yourself!
And led us up the side of the mountain.
And you founded Nigel Strawberry.
And you saved me from the giant kitty cat.
Oh, you got lots more
than dreams in your diapie, Tommy.
Thanks, guys.
That's the nicest stuff anyone's ever said.
So, hey, even though we're stucked in a cave
and there isn't any boat and we can't swim,
I still promise to get you out of here!
( cheering )
It's like my hero Nigel Strawberry always says...
The Martians have landed!
Um, no.
I was thinking 'bout when he says,
( British accent ): "Don't give up hope,
fateful viewers!"
( gasping )
ANGELICA: Ahoy, babies!
Now who's your princess?
Yay! Let's go!
We're saved!
CHARLOTTE: Drew, there's no longer a ringing in my ears
from constant cell-phone usage.
Oh, isn't this paradise?
Sure is, honey!
Whoa! Honey!
Didi, you think this is done?
I've never cooked a fish with its head still on.
Well, let me see.
Does it flake when...
( yelling )
My fish!
Who's that little cannibal boy?
Those look an awful lot
like Chuckie's sneakers.
You ate the fish and Chuckie!
Come on, guys!
After him!
Whoa!
Hey, whoa-oh...
He's getting away!
( yelling )
( shouting )
Well, it's not a clouded leopard,
but at least I'll have film of something.
( Donnie yelling )
MARIANNE: Donnie!
( people yelling )
This is supposed to be a deserted island.
Oh, thank heavens!
We're part of an elaborate television stunt
designed to humiliate us.
Who are you?
( all talking at once )
Hold it.
My name is Marianne Thornberry.
From the nature show?
We're shipwrecked.
Can you help us, Marianne?
Of course. Our camp is nearby.
DEBBIE ( over radio ): Oh, Mom. What's up?
I need you to bring the Comvee
over to the east beach.
DEBBIE: Uh, that may be a problem.
Don't worry about cleaning up.
Oh, thanks, but that's not the problem.
Just get here. Now.
My daughter will bring our trailer
and my husband will be along soon and...
Behold fellow islanders!
I, Stu Pickles, have built us a radio!
Stu, who's watching the kids?
Oh, Angelica said she'd take care of them.
( all gasp )
( frantic shouting )
Chuckie!
Oh, this is very strange.
I feel like this has happened before.
( gasps )
( frantic shouting )
( Spike sighs )
Look at them...
chasing their own tails.
If only I could tell them that it doesn't work.
I know, I've done it.
I've chased my tail a million times.
It does not work.
( radio static ) It's getting a signal!
I'm very impressed.
Oh, Stu's an inventor.
Runs an ad in the shop-and-buy.
( Spike barking )
Girls, have you seen some children?
Just a bossy 3-year-old
who has delusions of being a princess.
Angelica! ANGELICA (over radio): I'm the boss
of this bathie thing. That's her!
SUSIE: We haven't moved a bit, Angelica.
She must have turned on the radio in the bathysphere.
A 3-year-old's driving the bathysphere?!
What the heck?
( all talking at once )
Hey, it's no problem.
We can track them by radar from the Comvee.
Uh... yeah. Except...
I sunk the Comvee.
You what?!
( gasps )
I'm beginning to think you tooked this scrubmarine
without permission, Angelica.
Oh, you think you're such a know-it-all, Carmichael.
Now, here's the right button.
( metallic clanking )
You need this to drive.
Now, here's the other right button.
( engine accelerating )
* I'll send an S.O.S. to the world *
* I hope that someone gets my *
* Message in a bottle, yeah
* Message in a bottle...
Oh, I can't get a signal. ( radio static )
We've got to try to reach them on your coconut.
ANGELICA ( over radio ): Uh-uh, Carmichael.
Hello. Calling Angelica.
She really did give me cream soda.
Angelica, Susie. Can you hear me?
SUSIE: You didn't have permission, Angelica!
( gasps ): Angelica!
Stop fighting this instant and listen to your father!
ANGELICA: ...accessory!
Sorry, Mommy. ( adults cheering )
Our mommies and daddies! ( cheering )
Daddy, tell Susie to stop bothering me
while I'm trying to drive a scrubmarine!
Give me that, Angelica.
( gasps )
( yelling )
( gurgling )
SUSIE: Hiya!
( relieved murmuring )
What's this?
A new toy?
( metallic clicking )
( gasps ): Kippers!
I'm the happiest lad in all of England!
DEBBIE ( over radio ): Listen, Angeli-tiki,
it's me, Debbie.
Let me talk to my Dad.
Stop eating those smelly fish and talk to the teen.
( singsongy ): This little fishie goes to market.
NIGEL: This little fishie stays home.
Great. Dad finally lost it.
Something's wrong with Nigel.
Girls, this is Mrs.Thornberry.
Do you see a red handle?
I see it!
I need you to push that up.
That will bring you up to the surface.
Drooly, don't touch that!
( screaming )
( grunts, groaning )
( engine slowing )
( engine stops )
( gulping )
Oh, no, Nigel Strawberry!
This calls for my 'mergency bottle.
( groans )
( sputters )
( jabbering )
Hello there. ( jabbering )
Well, what have we here?
Who are all you positively adorable children?
Huh?
We're shipwrecked.
We went all over the island looking for you.
I saved them, but then Carmichael
tried to drive this tub-boat and now...
We just want to go home.
Well, of course you do, young lady.
And so we shall.
Hmm. Bit of a pickle.
No fuel left.
The radar appears to be knocked out,
which means I have no idea where we are
( console blips ) and we're almost out of oxygen.
I'm bored.
Yes, and there's that, too.
DEBBIE: Angeli-tiki, come in!
What's going on down there?!
Deborah?
Is that you?
Dad! You're back to normal!
Well, Dad-normal anyway.
Oh, Nigel, thank goodness you're all right.
Can you bring her to the surface?
NIGEL: Impossible at the moment, dearest.
You'll have to engage
the automatic-retrieval system in the Comvee.
And I don't want to alarm anyone,
but we're a tad low on oxygen down here.
MARIANNE: Copy that. ( parents talking frantically )
We'll get you as soon as we can.
Over and out.
Okay, we have to raise the Comvee.
( gasping, coughing )
( Spike barks )
( gasping )
( coughs ): No go.
The pump's destroyed
and there's a huge rip in the pontoon.
( all moaning )
DEBBIE: What, it's ripped?
Hang on.
The professor's getting an idea.
How about a little song to lift our spirits?
* Old MacDonald had a farm
* E-I-E-I-O
* And on his farm he had a ring-tailed lemur *
* E-I-E-I-O
* With a guttural roar here
* And a throaty rumble there... *
STU: Okay, here's the plan.
We'll transfer force from the bi-pedal energy generator.
to the dual reduction chamber.
The resulting compressed atmospheric matrix
will transverse the tubular transport mechanisms,
which you gentlemen will connect to the deflated pontoon.
This will increase the displacement coefficient
of the Comvee and it will rise
aided by a fulcrum driven counter balance
weighted with coconuts.
Let's do it!
( all talking excitedly )
how are we going to inflate a pontoon with a hole in it?
CHAS: Oh, no.
DREW: What do we do now?
What's going on?
We can't raise the Comvee.
We need something to patch it.
DEBBIE: Eliza!
There's a rafty thingy out there.
Can we use that?
It's perfect!
She found your boat, Spike.
They can use it to patch the Comvee.
I'll get it!
Spike, no!
The waves are too big!
Hey, this is Spike you're talking to.
I've paddled my way to more tennis balls than I can count!
( coughs, barks )
If I could count.
But I'm afraid you won't make it!
And if I don't, well, no one's going to say
that ol' Down Spike didn't try his best.
( gasping )
You only go around once in this crazy, mixed-up life.
( gasping )
Well, not cats.
They get nine lives
while dogs have to cram seven years into one.
Now that bites!
( barks, gasps )
STU: That a boy, Spike.
DIDI: Good boy, Spike.
( baby giggling )
( Spike grunts )
( gasping )
( growls )
Look! It's Spike!
( excited chattering )
DEBBIE: Ooh, nice save, dog.
Good boy, Spike.
But what are we going to use for glue?
( moans )
I'll take care of it.
( munching )
That gum won't stay sticky for long.
Places! Let's go.
Debbie?
Don't worry, Mom.
I'm on it.
( gasping )
Got it!
Pedal!
( air hissing )
( grunting )
( vines creaking )
KIRA: It's working!
( gasps )
( chattering )
( cheering )
NIGEL: * And on his farm
* He had a oceanospirillum multiglouliferum *
* E-I-E-I-O.
Can we go home now, Mr. Strawberry?
( gasping )
( console beeping )
We've got 'em!
Now let's reel 'em in.
( cheering )
MARIANNE: Nigel,
is everybody okay down there?
Excellent, dearest.
Well, one little girl is rather pouty
and somebody needs a diaper change-- I won't say whom.
Smashing!
Why, it's the architeuthis,
commonly known as the giant squid.
Isn't she magnificent?
If only I had a camera...
Here, Mr. Strawberry...
NIGEL: 60 feet long
and two tons of boneless flesh.
Oh, your picture
didn't come out.
Well, that's probably as it should be.
You see, children, the giant squid
has never been seen alive before.
I suppose this marvel of nature will be our little secret.
What do you say?
( babbling )
( laughs )
Couldn't have said it better myself.
( babbles )
( excited chattering )
Here I am!
Mommy! Daddy!
Dil!
Susie!
Where's Tommy?
And who does this little chap belong to?
( barking )
He's ours.
( Tommy babbling )
Come here, champ.
MARIANNE: Honey,
I'd like you to meet Stu Pickles.
He made the coconut radio that saved your lives.
Terribly grateful, Mr. Pickles.
I have a feeling I wouldn't be here
without this little chap, either.
( barking )
Pickles!
( gasps )
You might grow up
to be just like Nigel Strawberry after all.
Thanks, Angelica.
But I think I'll grow up to be just like my daddy.
Well, bro, I got to hand it to you...
I'm so proud of you, Stu.
Oh, Nigel, I was so worried.
I confess, I was, too.
I hated the thought of our last family meal
being shortchanged because we had to go find a leopard.
( sighs )
( sighing ): Your father's right.
We lost sight of what's important--
spending time together.
( Donnie gibbering )
Okay, everyone.
Let's pack up.
We're going on vacation!
( cheering )
How about...
ALL: The Lipschitz Cruise!
DEBBIE: We're leaving to go on vacation.
Oh, yeah, right on.
( rock beat plays )
Ya-hoo!
( shrieking )
* Here comes Spike the dog again *
* With babies and a chill
* Got a talking girl
* We're going on another road trip *
Well, Eliza, as dog is my witness,
I'll never lose my babies again!
* I've been howling since I bought my ticket *
* Somethin' called love
* Yeah, somethin' called love
* I'm through chasing all the kitty cats *
* Well, I'm just a modern dog
* You've seen me chasing my tail before *
* Gotta lust for life
* A lust for life *
* I gotta lust for life
* Ooh *
* I gotta lust for life
* Ooh *
* I gotta lust for life
* Ooh
* Whoa, lust for life
* Ooh *
* Yeah, I got lust for life
* Ooh *
* I gotta lust for life
* Ooh *
* I gotta lust for life
* Ooh *
* I gotta lust for life.
( howling )
( fast rock beat plays )
* Hey-hoo
What's that?
* Hey-hoo
* I woke up in the mist on a desert isle *
* I dreamt that I was kissed by a crocodile *
* Oh, yeah, yeah, must be lizard love *
* I think this must be love 'cause I just got shined *
* Like Tarzan kissing Jane for the very first time *
* Oh, whoa, whoa, must be lizard love *
* Oh, whoa, whoa, I call it lizard love *
* It's a jungle love lover
* It's the kind that likes to kiss and tell *
* It's a little bit of heaven, 24/7
* Riding life on the back of a gazelle *
* A let-down voodoo bee will make you do the do *
* And you can blame it on the heat *
* I put a spell on you
* Oh, whoa, whoa, must be lizard love *
* Oh, whoa, whoa, I call it lizard love *
* At first I thought I was dreaming *
* Then I'd wake up and she'd disappear *
* But by the time we got to Jurassic Park *
* She was laughing and screaming *
* Swinging from a chandelier.
( song fades )
( folk melody plays )
* Here we go, another day
* Looking for another way
* Tired of taking the back seat *
* Mm-hmm
* Carry on from place to place
* Hold our heads up, smile with grace *
* No time for tears and no escape *
* Hold on, can you save me?
* Take off your shoes and sit for a while *
* I'd like to know if you hear what I'm saying now *
* Oh
* Stop changing faces
* Oh, it's time to go home
* I'm so tired of this game we play *
* Changing places
* Take a look in these eyes
* There's so much more that we need to say *
* Tired of fighting to be heard *
* I've been waiting, when's my turn? *
* I hold my heart out up to you *
* Uh-huh
* So many things we all have learned *
* I count the blessings with every turn *
* Can't forget my faith in you
* How nice to be ordinary
* Time out, can't pretend any more *
* I'd like to know if you hear what I'm saying now *
* I'd like to be myself for a while, just me *
* Stop changing faces
* Oh, it's time to go home
* I'm so tired of this game we play *
* Changing places
* Take a look in these eyes *
* There's so much more that we need to say *
* Changing faces
* Oh, it's time to go home
* I'm so tired of this game we play *
* Changing places
* Take a look in these eyes
* There's so much more...
Captioning sponsored by PARAMOUNT PICTURES
Captioned by
Wake up.
( crowing )