1
00:01:15,452 --> 00:01:18,843
Zero, this is Zero One Alpha. We
have secured Falcon.
2
00:01:18,868 --> 00:01:21,476
I say again, We have
secured Falcon.
3
00:01:22,952 --> 00:01:26,452
I will count from one to ten.
Within that you'll tell me what I wanna know.
4
00:01:27,052 --> 00:01:28,752
Otherwise...
5
00:01:28,929 --> 00:01:32,052
the number ten is
the last thing you'll hear.
6
00:01:32,352 --> 00:01:33,352
One,
7
00:01:33,650 --> 00:01:34,691
two,
8
00:01:34,733 --> 00:01:35,291
three...
9
00:01:35,552 --> 00:01:36,712
four,
10
00:01:37,210 --> 00:01:38,225
five,
11
00:01:38,293 --> 00:01:39,392
six,
12
00:01:39,403 --> 00:01:40,502
seven,
13
00:01:40,520 --> 00:01:40,819
eight...
14
00:01:40,852 --> 00:01:42,852
Grenade. Get Back.
15
00:01:42,876 --> 00:01:44,476
Allahu Akbar.
16
00:01:56,754 --> 00:01:58,754
Shit.
17
00:01:58,854 --> 00:02:00,854
Fucking missed it
18
00:02:00,954 --> 00:02:02,954
How did I fucking miss it...
19
00:02:04,952 --> 00:02:09,152
Merlin, I apologize for putting you
in this position.
20
00:02:09,352 --> 00:02:11,052
You trained him well.
21
00:02:11,952 --> 00:02:14,152
James,
22
00:02:14,250 --> 00:02:17,025
your training is over.
23
00:02:18,452 --> 00:02:21,350
Welcome to Kingsman,
24
00:02:21,400 --> 00:02:22,900
Lancelot.
25
00:02:22,903 --> 00:02:24,903
Sir
26
00:02:26,652 --> 00:02:29,152
I'll deal with this mess.
27
00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:31,200
Personally.
28
00:02:32,675 --> 00:02:35,396
London
29
00:02:35,952 --> 00:02:39,652
I very much regret that your husband's
bravery can't be publicly celebrated.
30
00:02:39,752 --> 00:02:40,707
I hope you understand.
31
00:02:40,736 --> 00:02:41,834
How can I understand?
32
00:02:41,875 --> 00:02:43,875
You won't tell me anything!
33
00:02:45,330 --> 00:02:47,798
I didn't even know he
wasn't with his squad.
34
00:02:47,987 --> 00:02:50,079
I'm so sorry, I can't say more.
35
00:02:50,952 --> 00:02:54,152
I would like to present you
with this medal of valor.
36
00:02:54,252 --> 00:02:57,552
If you look closely on the back,
there's a number.
37
00:02:57,652 --> 00:03:00,452
And as a more concrete gesture of our
gratitude,
38
00:03:00,500 --> 00:03:01,649
we'd like to offer you a...
39
00:03:03,326 --> 00:03:05,126
Let's call it a favor.
40
00:03:05,210 --> 00:03:06,490
The nature of it is your choice.
41
00:03:06,812 --> 00:03:10,383
Just tell the operator: "Oxford's, not Brogue's".
42
00:03:10,420 --> 00:03:13,195
And then I'll know it's you.
43
00:03:13,252 --> 00:03:15,252
I don't want your help.
44
00:03:15,852 --> 00:03:18,352
I want my husband back.
45
00:03:26,246 --> 00:03:27,541
What's your name, young man?
46
00:03:28,290 --> 00:03:28,965
Eggsy.
47
00:03:29,152 --> 00:03:31,452
Hello, Eggsy.
48
00:03:31,460 --> 00:03:33,460
Can I see that?
49
00:03:39,652 --> 00:03:41,752
You take care of this, Eggsy.
50
00:03:42,596 --> 00:03:43,596
All right?
51
00:03:48,052 --> 00:03:49,752
And take care of your mom too.
52
00:04:11,507 --> 00:04:16,319
Kingsman
The Secret Service
53
00:04:22,973 --> 00:04:26,752
Argentina, 17 Years Later
54
00:04:30,452 --> 00:04:34,110
So sorry, Professor Arnold.
Just a tiny bit more.
55
00:04:34,210 --> 00:04:36,799
Oh for god's sakes, just strip it off.
56
00:04:36,984 --> 00:04:40,590
I am under very strict instructions
not to hurt you.
57
00:04:40,744 --> 00:04:42,944
Look, you've made a mistake.
58
00:04:43,052 --> 00:04:45,852
I am university lecturer.
I've got no money.
59
00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:47,552
This isn't about money.
60
00:04:47,570 --> 00:04:49,245
Our boss just wants to just talk to you.
61
00:04:49,852 --> 00:04:51,927
Am I meant to find that reassuring?
62
00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:54,200
He'll be here soon. He'll explain.
63
00:04:55,052 --> 00:04:56,852
Do you like whiskey?
64
00:04:56,898 --> 00:04:59,873
Red, get a '62 Dalmore.
65
00:04:59,897 --> 00:05:01,351
Hhmm...
66
00:05:01,352 --> 00:05:04,474
Honestly, this whiskey is amazing.
67
00:05:04,640 --> 00:05:06,735
You will shit.
68
00:05:25,956 --> 00:05:29,802
I suppose asking to borrow a cup of sugar
is a step too far?
69
00:05:52,152 --> 00:05:54,452
Professor Arnold,
70
00:05:54,528 --> 00:05:56,528
I'm here to take you home.
71
00:06:06,009 --> 00:06:09,085
Hmm... 1962 Dalmore.
72
00:06:09,173 --> 00:06:11,184
It would be a sin to spill any.
73
00:06:11,721 --> 00:06:13,643
Don't you think?
74
00:06:53,952 --> 00:06:55,948
Can you hold these?
75
00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:58,000
Please.
76
00:07:09,936 --> 00:07:11,036
Thank you.
77
00:07:17,752 --> 00:07:19,594
Everything is clean.
78
00:07:25,345 --> 00:07:28,052
My kind of welcome.
79
00:07:35,652 --> 00:07:37,952
No stomach for violence.
80
00:07:37,966 --> 00:07:38,641
I mean, literally.
81
00:07:38,652 --> 00:07:41,252
I see one drop of blood, that is me..
82
00:07:41,630 --> 00:07:42,205
...done.
83
00:07:42,252 --> 00:07:43,652
I am like ...
84
00:07:43,673 --> 00:07:44,673
...projectile.
85
00:07:44,952 --> 00:07:47,552
Listen, I'm so sorry...
86
00:07:47,650 --> 00:07:50,025
you had to witness all this unpleasantness.
87
00:07:50,352 --> 00:07:52,752
Due to our uninvited guest.
88
00:07:52,920 --> 00:07:54,095
But I promise you,
89
00:07:54,152 --> 00:07:57,152
By the time I find out who he works for...
90
00:07:57,152 --> 00:08:01,852
you and I will be the best of friends.
91
00:08:08,028 --> 00:08:10,085
To the shop, please.
92
00:08:33,352 --> 00:08:35,352
Arthur is in the dining room, sir.
93
00:08:45,052 --> 00:08:46,352
Arthur.
94
00:08:46,485 --> 00:08:47,485
Galahad.
95
00:08:47,852 --> 00:08:52,519
The others were beginning to wonder
if we were going to have a double toast.
96
00:08:55,152 --> 00:08:58,568
Gentlemen, I am thankful to say that
it's been 17 years...
97
00:08:58,668 --> 00:09:02,052
since we last had occasion
to use this decanter.
98
00:09:02,652 --> 00:09:06,952
Lancelot was an outstanding agent
and a true Kingsman.
99
00:09:07,052 --> 00:09:08,652
He will be sorely missed.
100
00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:11,600
To Lancelot.
101
00:09:12,464 --> 00:09:14,464
To Lancelot
102
00:09:17,389 --> 00:09:22,252
I intend to start the selection process
for Lancelot's replacement tomorrow.
103
00:09:22,952 --> 00:09:25,938
I want each of you to propose a candidate
104
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:27,841
and have them report to UK HQ
105
00:09:27,904 --> 00:09:30,752
No later than 9 p.m. GMT.
106
00:09:30,860 --> 00:09:32,860
Thank you.
107
00:09:34,352 --> 00:09:36,032
Merlin.
108
00:09:36,232 --> 00:09:37,232
Come in.
109
00:09:38,052 --> 00:09:40,779
Lancelot was investigating
a group of mercenaries
110
00:09:40,804 --> 00:09:43,476
who were experimenting
with biological weaponry.
111
00:09:43,553 --> 00:09:46,027
Glasses, gentlemen. Please.
112
00:09:47,352 --> 00:09:51,352
Uganda, 2012. Synthetic Cathinone.
113
00:09:51,452 --> 00:09:54,352
You put it in the water supply of
a guerrilla army base.
114
00:09:54,452 --> 00:09:58,452
Rage, cannibalism. Multiple fatalities.
115
00:09:59,652 --> 00:10:01,652
Chechnya, 2013.
116
00:10:01,844 --> 00:10:03,319
Insurgents turned on one another.
117
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:07,152
Indisputable, the work of our mercenaries
but no trace of any chemicals of any kind.
118
00:10:07,252 --> 00:10:09,540
So what happened to Lancelot?
119
00:10:09,650 --> 00:10:12,237
He tracked them to this property in Argentina.
120
00:10:12,552 --> 00:10:14,589
And while he had them
under surveillance,
121
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,852
he became aware that they had
effected a kidnapping.
122
00:10:16,879 --> 00:10:20,591
So he executed a solo rescue mission... which failed.
123
00:10:21,383 --> 00:10:24,844
This is his last transmission:
KIDNAP VICTIM IS PROFESSOR JAMES ARNOLD
124
00:10:24,952 --> 00:10:27,685
- Who is he?
- Some climate change doomsayer.
125
00:10:27,786 --> 00:10:31,352
Expounded something called Gaia theory
about the world healing itself or some such.
126
00:10:31,452 --> 00:10:34,952
But what's curious,
is he's not actually missing.
127
00:10:35,652 --> 00:10:37,152
This is Professor Arnold.
128
00:10:38,052 --> 00:10:40,252
At Imperial College, this morning.
129
00:10:41,352 --> 00:10:45,552
It's all yours.
And don't forget your membership proposal.
130
00:10:45,752 --> 00:10:48,952
Try picking a more suitable candidate this time.
131
00:10:49,052 --> 00:10:50,412
17 years
132
00:10:50,779 --> 00:10:54,155
and still evolving with the times remains
an entirely foreign concept to you.
133
00:10:54,713 --> 00:10:57,982
Need i remind you, I wouldn't be here
if it weren't for that young man.
134
00:10:58,052 --> 00:11:00,972
He was as much Kingsman material
as any of them.
135
00:11:01,035 --> 00:11:02,090
More so.
136
00:11:02,152 --> 00:11:05,152
But he wasn't exactly one of us, was he?
137
00:11:05,852 --> 00:11:09,852
Let's face it, Galahad.
Your little experiment failed.
138
00:11:10,752 --> 00:11:13,769
With respect, Arthur, you're a snob.
139
00:11:14,052 --> 00:11:16,463
With respect?
140
00:11:16,590 --> 00:11:18,154
The world is changing.
141
00:11:18,552 --> 00:11:22,308
There's a reason why aristocrats
developed weak chins.
142
00:11:41,198 --> 00:11:42,352
Eggsy?
143
00:11:44,552 --> 00:11:46,533
Eggsy, come here.
144
00:11:49,452 --> 00:11:51,852
- Got any whistler, babe?
- No.
145
00:11:51,905 --> 00:11:54,221
Why don't you do your mamma a favor,
Go down to the shop and get some.
146
00:11:54,264 --> 00:11:57,940
- Get 'em yourself.
- Oi, What i have said to you about speaking to Dean like that?
147
00:11:57,952 --> 00:12:01,311
Three's a crowd, isn't it
Why don't Dean's poodle go?
148
00:12:01,452 --> 00:12:02,862
I tell you what,
149
00:12:03,221 --> 00:12:06,486
Why don't you take this and get the stuff
and get yourself some sweets?
150
00:12:06,650 --> 00:12:10,931
And while you're gone, we'll show your mother
how three can be good a company.
151
00:12:13,491 --> 00:12:14,841
Thanks babe.
152
00:12:16,927 --> 00:12:17,971
Come here.
153
00:12:22,252 --> 00:12:23,853
Here we go.
154
00:12:25,367 --> 00:12:26,652
Is it better?
155
00:12:41,253 --> 00:12:44,224
If Dean treat your mum's so bad, why doesn't she leave him?
156
00:12:44,540 --> 00:12:45,209
Low self-esteem.
157
00:12:45,293 --> 00:12:46,417
That's her problem.
158
00:12:46,480 --> 00:12:48,018
Fuck off, why would she have low self-esteem?
159
00:12:48,056 --> 00:12:49,580
Eggsy mum's a world fit.
160
00:12:50,145 --> 00:12:52,502
- No offense pal.
- It's all right.
161
00:12:53,279 --> 00:12:57,287
- One of these days I'm gonna smash his face in.
- Are you mental, cuz?
162
00:12:57,935 --> 00:13:00,535
He'll just get that lot to do you
and then pretend he knew nothing
163
00:13:02,550 --> 00:13:03,425
...about it.
164
00:13:03,482 --> 00:13:06,468
Oy, you think you can chat
shit about us and we wont do nothing,
165
00:13:06,499 --> 00:13:08,876
just because our governor bangin' Eggsy's mum?
166
00:13:08,915 --> 00:13:10,830
Pretty much, yeah.
167
00:13:10,849 --> 00:13:13,846
Leave it, let's just go, man. It's not worth it.
168
00:13:13,852 --> 00:13:17,052
You boys have outstayed your welcome.
169
00:13:17,150 --> 00:13:19,150
Leave.
170
00:13:19,923 --> 00:13:21,223
What?
171
00:13:21,452 --> 00:13:23,404
I'm sorry about that bruh.
172
00:13:26,352 --> 00:13:27,918
Yeah... muck.
173
00:13:29,796 --> 00:13:32,235
They weren't fucking worth it, Boys.
174
00:13:33,712 --> 00:13:36,861
It's freezing.
Why are we walking?
175
00:13:37,410 --> 00:13:41,531
- You jacked his fucking car keys, bruh?
- Yeah, now we're gonna nick his car.
176
00:13:41,555 --> 00:13:43,555
Fucking shit.
177
00:13:49,718 --> 00:13:51,147
Hold on boys.
178
00:13:53,862 --> 00:13:55,536
Hey, That's my fucking car.
179
00:13:55,560 --> 00:13:57,560
Oi, Oi, Eggsy.
180
00:13:57,926 --> 00:14:00,235
I swear,
you're in fucking trouble.
181
00:14:11,921 --> 00:14:13,277
Floor it, Eggsy.
182
00:14:18,347 --> 00:14:19,995
Hey yeah Dean, look it's me.
183
00:14:20,096 --> 00:14:22,096
Eggsy just stole my fucking car.
184
00:14:22,196 --> 00:14:26,582
I've come out of the pub, He's done 15 about donuts
on my fucking face and then he's drove off.
185
00:14:26,852 --> 00:14:31,872
No, I cant, He's disrespecting me
and so he's disrespecting you.
186
00:15:15,310 --> 00:15:16,466
Thickie.
187
00:15:18,677 --> 00:15:21,852
Foxes are vermin, cuz.
You should've driven it over.
188
00:15:21,951 --> 00:15:23,951
I should've done a lot of things.
189
00:15:24,051 --> 00:15:26,051
I'll sort this, get out of the car.
190
00:15:26,583 --> 00:15:28,151
Get out of the fucking car.
191
00:15:37,052 --> 00:15:40,552
Eggsy, there is no such thing as honor among thieves.
192
00:15:41,552 --> 00:15:45,352
Now you can start giving me some
names of the boys you were with...
193
00:15:45,769 --> 00:15:47,269
Or you go down.
194
00:15:48,035 --> 00:15:49,235
It's up to you.
195
00:15:50,452 --> 00:15:53,385
I want to exercise my right to a phone call.
196
00:15:54,952 --> 00:15:57,952
Well, I hope it's to your mom...
197
00:15:58,452 --> 00:16:02,184
to tell her that you're gonna to be
18 months late for your dinner.
198
00:16:32,652 --> 00:16:35,577
Customer complaints.
How may I help you?
199
00:16:35,952 --> 00:16:40,452
My name's Eggsy Unwin. Sorry, Gary Unwin.
200
00:16:41,152 --> 00:16:44,009
And I'm up shit creek, I'm in
an urban police station and
201
00:16:44,058 --> 00:16:45,699
my mom said to call this number
if ever I needed help...
202
00:16:45,776 --> 00:16:48,251
I'm sorry, sir. Wrong number.
203
00:16:48,352 --> 00:16:49,909
Wait, wait
204
00:16:51,195 --> 00:16:53,826
Oxford's not Brogue's?
205
00:16:55,352 --> 00:16:57,089
Your complaint has been duly noted,
206
00:16:57,117 --> 00:16:59,888
and we hope that we've not lost you
as a loyal customer.
207
00:17:11,026 --> 00:17:12,154
Yeah...
208
00:17:13,952 --> 00:17:15,152
Shit, What?
209
00:17:19,952 --> 00:17:22,152
Yes, I totally understand.
210
00:17:42,277 --> 00:17:43,477
Eggsy
211
00:17:43,552 --> 00:17:45,663
Would you like a lift home?
212
00:17:46,343 --> 00:17:47,118
Who are you?
213
00:17:47,152 --> 00:17:49,052
The man who got you released.
214
00:17:49,118 --> 00:17:50,118
That ain't an answer.
215
00:17:50,452 --> 00:17:52,652
A little gratitude would be nice.
216
00:17:53,652 --> 00:17:55,496
My name is Harry Hart.
217
00:17:56,070 --> 00:17:57,745
And I gave you that medal.
218
00:17:58,652 --> 00:18:00,852
Your father saved my life.
219
00:18:03,952 --> 00:18:06,552
So before you was a tailor, were
you in the army?
220
00:18:07,200 --> 00:18:08,275
Like an officer?
221
00:18:08,537 --> 00:18:09,737
Not quite.
222
00:18:10,250 --> 00:18:11,825
So where was you posted, Iraq or something?
223
00:18:11,852 --> 00:18:14,052
Sorry, Eggsy. Classified.
224
00:18:14,952 --> 00:18:16,952
But my dad saved your life, yeah?
225
00:18:17,752 --> 00:18:19,852
The day your father died,
226
00:18:20,098 --> 00:18:21,473
I missed something.
227
00:18:22,252 --> 00:18:24,209
And if it weren't for
his courage, my mistake
228
00:18:24,234 --> 00:18:26,276
would have cost the lives
of every man present.
229
00:18:27,552 --> 00:18:29,309
So I owe him.
230
00:18:30,152 --> 00:18:33,652
Your father was a brave man.
231
00:18:33,795 --> 00:18:34,795
A good man.
232
00:18:35,452 --> 00:18:38,952
And having read your files, I'd think he'd
be bitterly disappointed in the choices you've made.
233
00:18:39,053 --> 00:18:40,573
You can't talk to me like that.
234
00:18:40,740 --> 00:18:42,867
Huge IQ, great performance in primary school.
235
00:18:44,025 --> 00:18:45,588
And it all went tits up.
236
00:18:45,900 --> 00:18:48,800
Drugs, petty crime, never had a job.
237
00:18:48,999 --> 00:18:50,277
Do you think there's a lot of jobs going around here?
238
00:18:50,752 --> 00:18:52,928
Doesn't explain why you
gave up your hobbies.
239
00:18:52,953 --> 00:18:55,080
First prize, regional
under tens' gymnastics
240
00:18:55,156 --> 00:18:58,752
Two years in a row. Your coach had you
pegged as Olympic team material.
241
00:18:58,852 --> 00:19:00,434
Yeah and when you grow up
around someone like my
242
00:19:00,459 --> 00:19:01,976
step-dad, you pick up new
hobbies pretty quick.
243
00:19:02,052 --> 00:19:04,752
Ah of course, always someone else's fault.
244
00:19:05,525 --> 00:19:07,374
And who's to blame you for
quitting the Marines?
245
00:19:07,399 --> 00:19:10,076
You were halfway through training,
doing brilliantly, but you gave up.
246
00:19:10,152 --> 00:19:12,052
Because my mum went mental.
247
00:19:12,325 --> 00:19:14,700
Banging on about losing me as well as my dad.
248
00:19:15,252 --> 00:19:17,678
Then we wouldn't be cannon
fodder for snobs like
249
00:19:17,703 --> 00:19:20,276
you, judging people like
me from your ivory towers.
250
00:19:20,352 --> 00:19:23,179
With no thought about why we do what we do.
251
00:19:23,477 --> 00:19:26,106
We ain't got much choice, you get me?
252
00:19:26,133 --> 00:19:28,714
And if we was born with the same
silver spoon up our arses...
253
00:19:28,814 --> 00:19:30,836
we would do just as well as you,
254
00:19:31,043 --> 00:19:32,336
if not better.
255
00:19:32,454 --> 00:19:34,454
What the fuck you doing here?
You taking a piss?
256
00:19:36,152 --> 00:19:39,252
Some more examples of young men who
simply need a silver suppository?
257
00:19:39,352 --> 00:19:41,351
Ya, they are exceptions. Come on.
258
00:19:41,409 --> 00:19:42,688
Nonsense, we haven't finished our drinks.
259
00:19:42,752 --> 00:19:44,763
After you nicked his
car, Dean says you're a
260
00:19:44,788 --> 00:19:46,976
fair guy I don't give a
shit what your mum says.
261
00:19:47,052 --> 00:19:48,752
Listen, boys.
262
00:19:49,885 --> 00:19:53,791
I've had a rather emotional day,
so whatever your beef with Eggsy is,
263
00:19:53,791 --> 00:19:56,243
and I'm sure it's well founded...
264
00:19:56,652 --> 00:19:59,874
I would appreciate it enormously
if you could just leave us in peace...
265
00:19:59,974 --> 00:20:02,864
until I finish this lovely pint of Guinness.
266
00:20:06,152 --> 00:20:08,852
You should get out of the way, Granddaddy.
Or you'll get hurt a lot.
267
00:20:08,952 --> 00:20:10,952
He ain't joking, you should go.
268
00:20:17,052 --> 00:20:18,275
Excuse me.
269
00:20:20,043 --> 00:20:23,243
If you're looking for another rent boy,
they're on the corner of Smith's Street.
270
00:20:28,752 --> 00:20:30,063
Manners...
271
00:20:31,252 --> 00:20:32,511
maketh...
272
00:20:35,452 --> 00:20:36,730
man.
273
00:20:44,352 --> 00:20:46,367
Do you know what that means?
274
00:20:47,952 --> 00:20:49,952
Then let me teach you a lesson.
275
00:20:58,952 --> 00:21:02,652
Are we going to stand around here all day,
or are we going to fight?
276
00:21:47,387 --> 00:21:49,427
You fucking... You fucking...
277
00:21:52,745 --> 00:21:53,862
"STUN"
278
00:22:03,639 --> 00:22:05,035
Amnesia
279
00:22:31,075 --> 00:22:32,494
Sorry about that.
280
00:22:33,028 --> 00:22:35,103
Needed to let off a little steam.
281
00:22:35,152 --> 00:22:38,202
Heard, yesterday a friend of mine died.
282
00:22:39,052 --> 00:22:41,252
He knew your father too, actually.
283
00:22:43,452 --> 00:22:47,952
I do apologise, Eggsy. I should not
have done this in front of you.
284
00:22:48,052 --> 00:22:50,539
No. Please.. I won't say nothing,
I swear.
285
00:22:50,620 --> 00:22:52,366
If there is one thing I can
do, it's keep my mouth shut.
286
00:22:52,452 --> 00:22:54,819
- You won't tell a soul?
- I swear, I've never crossed anyone out.
287
00:22:54,852 --> 00:22:56,852
Is that a promise?
- On my life.
288
00:23:00,952 --> 00:23:02,952
Much appreciated, Eggsy.
289
00:23:03,052 --> 00:23:05,252
You're right about the snobs.
290
00:23:05,438 --> 00:23:07,913
But there too, there are exceptions.
291
00:23:08,052 --> 00:23:09,752
Best of luck with everything.
292
00:23:24,252 --> 00:23:28,452
In celebrity news, The Richmond Valentine movie
premiered in Hollywood, last night.
293
00:23:28,552 --> 00:23:31,512
The story of the Internet
billionaire's rise to power
294
00:23:31,537 --> 00:23:34,276
is expected to be this
award season's hot ticket.
295
00:23:34,352 --> 00:23:37,219
One notable absence
from the red carpet was
296
00:23:37,244 --> 00:23:40,376
Iggy Azalea, still missing
three days after...
297
00:23:42,752 --> 00:23:44,952
Eggsy, just go. Please because he's gonna...
298
00:23:47,100 --> 00:23:48,732
- Please don't hurt him.
- Fuck off!
299
00:23:49,748 --> 00:23:51,133
Shut the fuck up.
300
00:23:51,319 --> 00:23:53,491
Who was with you in that fucking pub?
301
00:23:53,622 --> 00:23:56,653
- I want to know the name of the geezer you was with.
- I was not with anyone.
302
00:23:57,331 --> 00:24:00,347
I don't know what you're on about.
303
00:24:00,556 --> 00:24:04,065
- Fucking tell me his name.
- I don't know what you're fucking on about.
304
00:24:08,748 --> 00:24:11,810
You listen to me, I want to know who you was with in that pub.
You Understand?
305
00:24:11,910 --> 00:24:13,910
I want to know his fucking name.
306
00:24:17,056 --> 00:24:19,882
I don't know what you're fucking on about.
307
00:24:21,351 --> 00:24:23,119
Fuck off.
308
00:24:23,752 --> 00:24:27,952
I could kill you right now and no one
in the the world will know it.
309
00:24:28,052 --> 00:24:29,435
But I would.
310
00:24:29,852 --> 00:24:31,854
I have enough evidence
on your activities to
311
00:24:31,879 --> 00:24:33,924
have you locked up for
the rest of your life.
312
00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:36,000
Mister Dean Anthony Baker.
313
00:24:36,396 --> 00:24:38,002
So I suggest you leave the boy alone.
314
00:24:38,103 --> 00:24:41,744
Or I shall be forced to deliver it
to the appropriate authorities.
315
00:24:42,272 --> 00:24:45,393
Eggsy, meet me at the tailor's
I told you about.
316
00:24:45,568 --> 00:24:47,568
What the fuck's going on here?
317
00:24:49,588 --> 00:24:51,010
Eggsy, you fucking maggot...
318
00:24:51,352 --> 00:24:52,725
Here's we gotta arrest him.
319
00:24:52,749 --> 00:24:54,749
Hey... hey... hey
320
00:24:55,106 --> 00:24:56,414
Come here.
321
00:24:56,438 --> 00:24:58,438
322
00:25:09,553 --> 00:25:10,553
You wanker!
323
00:25:10,600 --> 00:25:11,600
I'll have you soon.
324
00:25:37,752 --> 00:25:39,952
I've never met a tailor before.
325
00:25:40,602 --> 00:25:42,560
But I know you ain't one.
326
00:25:45,885 --> 00:25:47,482
Come with me.
327
00:25:56,324 --> 00:25:58,324
Come on here.
328
00:26:03,277 --> 00:26:04,514
What do you see?
329
00:26:04,614 --> 00:26:07,667
Someone who wants to know
what the fuck is going on.
330
00:26:09,423 --> 00:26:11,552
I see a young man with potential.
331
00:26:12,952 --> 00:26:14,652
A young man who is loyal.
332
00:26:15,852 --> 00:26:18,049
Who can do as he is asked,
333
00:26:18,225 --> 00:26:20,203
and who wants to do something good with his life.
334
00:26:22,052 --> 00:26:24,052
Did you see the film "Trading Places"?
335
00:26:24,076 --> 00:26:26,076
No
336
00:26:26,552 --> 00:26:29,452
How about "Nikita"?
337
00:26:29,611 --> 00:26:31,611
"Pretty Woman"?
338
00:26:31,635 --> 00:26:32,802
All right.
339
00:26:32,803 --> 00:26:35,350
My point is, the lack of a
silver spoon has set you
340
00:26:35,375 --> 00:26:37,676
on a certain path, but
you needn't stay on it.
341
00:26:38,043 --> 00:26:42,929
If you're prepare to adapt and learn,
you can transform.
342
00:26:43,152 --> 00:26:45,552
Oh, like in "My Fair Lady"?
343
00:26:46,452 --> 00:26:49,352
I know you're full of surprises.
344
00:26:49,377 --> 00:26:51,252
Yes, like "My Fair Lady"
345
00:26:52,452 --> 00:26:55,952
Only in this case, I am offering you the
opportunity to become a Kingsman.
346
00:26:56,552 --> 00:26:57,852
A tailor?
347
00:26:57,981 --> 00:27:00,356
A Kingsman agent.
348
00:27:01,152 --> 00:27:03,852
- Like a spy?
- Of sorts.
349
00:27:06,104 --> 00:27:07,304
Interested?
350
00:27:07,401 --> 00:27:09,890
You think I've got anything to lose?
351
00:27:16,852 --> 00:27:22,452
Since 1849, Kingsman Tailors have clothed
the world's most powerful individuals.
352
00:27:22,552 --> 00:27:26,952
In 1919, a great number of them had lost
their heirs to World War 1.
353
00:27:28,052 --> 00:27:31,052
That meant a lot of money going un-inherited.
354
00:27:31,552 --> 00:27:35,652
And a lot of powerful men with a desire
to preserve peace and protect life.
355
00:27:35,752 --> 00:27:38,202
Our founders realized
that they could channel
356
00:27:38,227 --> 00:27:40,676
that wealth and influence
for a greater good.
357
00:27:40,752 --> 00:27:44,652
And so began our adventure.
358
00:27:44,752 --> 00:27:47,810
An independent international
intelligence agency
359
00:27:47,835 --> 00:27:50,705
operating at the highest
level of discretion.
360
00:27:51,129 --> 00:27:53,229
Without the politics and bureaucracy...
361
00:27:53,330 --> 00:27:57,250
that undermine the integrity of
government run spy organizations.
362
00:27:57,876 --> 00:28:00,774
A suit is the modern gentleman's armor.
363
00:28:01,152 --> 00:28:04,152
And the Kingsman agents
are the new knights.
364
00:28:05,352 --> 00:28:08,052
- How deep does this fucking thing go?
- Deep enough.
365
00:28:52,552 --> 00:28:54,252
Shit. We're late.
366
00:29:18,952 --> 00:29:21,652
Your father had the same look on his face.
367
00:29:23,252 --> 00:29:24,508
As did I.
368
00:29:26,252 --> 00:29:27,489
Come on.
369
00:29:30,052 --> 00:29:32,352
- Galahad.
- My code name.
370
00:29:32,452 --> 00:29:34,752
Late again, sir.
371
00:29:34,878 --> 00:29:35,878
Good Luck.
372
00:29:36,052 --> 00:29:37,591
In you go.
373
00:29:48,752 --> 00:29:50,170
Fall in.
374
00:29:52,547 --> 00:29:55,347
Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Merlin.
375
00:29:55,552 --> 00:29:57,978
You are about to embark
on what is probably the
376
00:29:58,003 --> 00:30:00,176
most dangerous job
interview in the world.
377
00:30:00,252 --> 00:30:05,252
One of you and only one of you
will become the next Lancelot.
378
00:30:05,952 --> 00:30:09,452
Can anybody tell me what this is?
379
00:30:10,652 --> 00:30:12,965
- A body bag, sir.
- Correct.
380
00:30:13,352 --> 00:30:15,952
- Charlie, isn't it?
- Yes, sir.
381
00:30:16,052 --> 00:30:18,651
In a moment, you will
each collect a body bag.
382
00:30:18,676 --> 00:30:20,776
You will write your
name on that bag.
383
00:30:20,852 --> 00:30:24,152
You will write the details of your
next of kin. On that bag.
384
00:30:24,252 --> 00:30:26,002
This represents your
acknowledgment of
385
00:30:26,027 --> 00:30:27,776
the risks that you
are about to face...
386
00:30:27,852 --> 00:30:29,938
as well as your
agreement to strict
387
00:30:29,963 --> 00:30:32,976
confidentiality, which
incidentally if you break...
388
00:30:33,052 --> 00:30:38,752
will result in you and your next
of kin being in that bag.
389
00:30:40,452 --> 00:30:41,952
Is that understood?
390
00:30:43,352 --> 00:30:44,852
Excellent.
391
00:30:44,877 --> 00:30:46,376
Fall out.
392
00:30:53,652 --> 00:30:55,083
Roxanne. But..
393
00:30:55,108 --> 00:30:56,776
...call me Roxy.
394
00:30:56,852 --> 00:30:58,291
- I am Eggsy.
- Eggy?
395
00:30:58,316 --> 00:30:59,376
No, Eggsy
396
00:31:00,852 --> 00:31:02,356
Eggy... and where did
they dig you up?
397
00:31:02,381 --> 00:31:04,676
You know we are not allowed
to discuss who proposed us.
398
00:31:04,752 --> 00:31:06,182
No need to bite his head off.
399
00:31:06,207 --> 00:31:08,476
Charlie's only making
conversation, right Charlie?
400
00:31:09,052 --> 00:31:10,552
I'm Digby.
401
00:31:10,553 --> 00:31:12,227
Digby.
402
00:31:12,252 --> 00:31:13,525
Eggy, this is
403
00:31:13,550 --> 00:31:14,168
Rufus.
404
00:31:14,193 --> 00:31:15,532
Rufus, Eggy.
405
00:31:17,758 --> 00:31:20,678
So Eggy, are you
Oxford or Cambridge?
406
00:31:20,703 --> 00:31:21,703
Neither.
407
00:31:21,752 --> 00:31:22,980
St. Andrews? Durham?
408
00:31:23,005 --> 00:31:25,276
Oh wait, I think we may have met.
409
00:31:25,353 --> 00:31:28,975
Did you serve me at the McDonalds
in Winchester Service Station?
410
00:31:28,999 --> 00:31:30,215
No.
411
00:31:30,434 --> 00:31:32,954
But if I had, I give you an extra helping of secret sauce.
412
00:31:33,105 --> 00:31:34,899
It's definitely St. Andrews.
413
00:31:36,651 --> 00:31:38,851
- Just ignore them.
- Do you need a pen?
414
00:31:38,952 --> 00:31:39,577
Cheers.
415
00:31:39,602 --> 00:31:41,476
- Amelia, isn't it?
416
00:31:41,500 --> 00:31:43,500
- Amelia,
- Eggsy
417
00:31:43,524 --> 00:31:44,751
Hi Eggsy!
418
00:31:44,752 --> 00:31:46,808
Don't take any notice
of those guys.
419
00:31:46,833 --> 00:31:48,276
That's what I told him.
420
00:31:49,452 --> 00:31:52,052
It's just scare tactics.
421
00:31:52,152 --> 00:31:53,864
Classic army technique.
422
00:31:53,889 --> 00:31:55,376
No one's gonna die.
423
00:31:59,052 --> 00:32:00,291
Shame.
424
00:32:02,352 --> 00:32:05,378
Great, so you don't know,
the CIA don't know.
425
00:32:05,403 --> 00:32:07,376
Nobody knows who this guy is?
426
00:32:08,052 --> 00:32:08,727
Fine.
427
00:32:08,752 --> 00:32:10,776
Seriously, it's fine.
428
00:32:10,852 --> 00:32:12,796
Well, it's not really fine but
429
00:32:12,821 --> 00:32:14,376
it's not why I'm here.
430
00:32:14,852 --> 00:32:16,448
Hell man, you know me?
431
00:32:16,473 --> 00:32:18,141
Money's not my issue.
432
00:32:18,247 --> 00:32:20,694
I could have retired straight
out of MIT, fucked off
433
00:32:20,719 --> 00:32:22,935
to some island and let
the business run itself.
434
00:32:23,052 --> 00:32:26,202
Nobody told me to try
and save the planet.
435
00:32:26,227 --> 00:32:27,276
I wanted to.
436
00:32:27,552 --> 00:32:31,452
Climate change research, lobbying,
years of studying, billions of dollars.
437
00:32:31,552 --> 00:32:33,685
And you know why i quit?
438
00:32:33,785 --> 00:32:38,563
Because the last time I checked,
the planet was still fucked.
439
00:32:38,756 --> 00:32:41,328
Hence, my epiphany.
440
00:32:41,586 --> 00:32:44,352
Money won't solve this.
441
00:32:44,552 --> 00:32:46,797
Those idiots who call
themselves politicians,
442
00:32:46,822 --> 00:32:48,676
they bury their heads
in the sand...
443
00:32:48,752 --> 00:32:51,407
and stood for nothing but re-election.
444
00:32:52,052 --> 00:32:56,252
So I spent the last two years trying
to find a real solution.
445
00:32:56,728 --> 00:32:58,769
And I found it.
446
00:32:59,938 --> 00:33:03,143
Now, If you really want to make
the world a better place...
447
00:33:03,243 --> 00:33:05,480
I suggest you open
your fucking ears
448
00:33:05,505 --> 00:33:07,741
because I'm about
to tell it to you.
449
00:33:08,136 --> 00:33:09,864
Go on, Mr. Valentine.
450
00:33:09,889 --> 00:33:11,699
I'm still listening.
451
00:33:12,353 --> 00:33:15,953
As long as you agree to all my terms.
452
00:34:04,852 --> 00:34:07,852
No one panic. Listen to me. Stay calm.
453
00:34:11,551 --> 00:34:14,151
- Use snorkels.
- Use snorkels?
454
00:34:14,252 --> 00:34:17,204
- Shower heads.
- Shower heads?
455
00:34:17,304 --> 00:34:19,304
She's right. Go. Fucking go.
456
00:34:20,561 --> 00:34:22,673
And what about pulling the fucking door?
457
00:35:46,852 --> 00:35:47,778
Congratulations
458
00:35:47,803 --> 00:35:49,776
on completing your first task.
459
00:35:49,852 --> 00:35:52,352
Charlie, Roxy, well done.
460
00:35:52,452 --> 00:35:54,652
For those who 're still confused
461
00:35:54,752 --> 00:35:56,899
If you get a breathing
tube run the U-bend of
462
00:35:56,924 --> 00:35:58,976
a toilet, you have an
unlimited air supply.
463
00:35:59,052 --> 00:36:01,452
Simple physics. Worth remembering.
464
00:36:01,552 --> 00:36:02,383
Eggsy,
465
00:36:02,408 --> 00:36:04,900
Well done for spotting
that was a two-way mirror.
466
00:36:04,952 --> 00:36:06,244
He is probably seen enough of 'em.
467
00:36:06,269 --> 00:36:09,176
Yeah you can all wipe those
smirks off your faces.
468
00:36:09,230 --> 00:36:10,679
Because as far as
I am concerned,
469
00:36:10,704 --> 00:36:12,237
every single one
of you has failed.
470
00:36:13,652 --> 00:36:16,652
You all forgot the most important thing:
471
00:36:17,552 --> 00:36:18,752
Teamwork.
472
00:36:33,052 --> 00:36:35,957
So much for classic army technique.
473
00:36:38,652 --> 00:36:39,965
35,
474
00:36:39,990 --> 00:36:42,177
5.
475
00:36:42,752 --> 00:36:44,952
That's it.
476
00:36:49,947 --> 00:36:50,947
Hello?
477
00:36:51,152 --> 00:36:52,402
Can I help you?
478
00:36:52,427 --> 00:36:56,176
Yes, I have a question
about anthropogenic force.
479
00:36:57,452 --> 00:37:00,292
Really? Well, it's actually quite fascinating.
480
00:37:02,152 --> 00:37:03,847
My colleague died
trying to rescue you.
481
00:37:03,872 --> 00:37:05,820
And I'm sure you saw how
well-trained he was.
482
00:37:05,931 --> 00:37:08,752
So I suggest you tell me who kidnapped you
and why they let you go.
483
00:37:08,852 --> 00:37:10,873
I have no idea what you're talking about...
484
00:37:10,973 --> 00:37:13,257
I can not say, it was...
485
00:37:13,752 --> 00:37:16,752
Oh for god's sake, I barely touched you.
How man are...
486
00:37:35,952 --> 00:37:37,433
"IMPLANT ACTIVATED"
487
00:37:37,434 --> 00:37:40,434
Fuck that guy, whoever he is, I'm gonna...
488
00:37:41,559 --> 00:37:43,509
He made me kill
Professor Arnold.
489
00:37:43,534 --> 00:37:45,368
Goddamn loved Professor Arnold.
490
00:37:45,452 --> 00:37:46,264
Well the good news is
491
00:37:46,289 --> 00:37:48,376
we know the emergency and
surveillance systems work.
492
00:37:48,451 --> 00:37:50,492
You know what is not good news?
493
00:37:50,592 --> 00:37:52,166
"My colleague died."
494
00:37:52,191 --> 00:37:53,922
That's what he said.
495
00:37:54,043 --> 00:37:56,449
This is an organization
and they are all over us.
496
00:37:56,474 --> 00:37:57,628
Whoever you spoke to...
497
00:37:57,714 --> 00:38:02,352
I told you, I am in contact with the
KGB, MI6, Mossad and Beijing.
498
00:38:02,452 --> 00:38:04,552
They all insist he
wasn't one of theirs.
499
00:38:04,577 --> 00:38:05,577
Beijing.
500
00:38:05,852 --> 00:38:10,052
So freaky how there's no recognizable name
for the Chinese Secret Service.
501
00:38:10,552 --> 00:38:13,052
Now that's what you call a secret, right?
502
00:38:13,590 --> 00:38:14,590
You know what?
503
00:38:14,617 --> 00:38:19,051
Fuck it. We need to speed things up.
Bring the product release forward.
504
00:38:19,152 --> 00:38:22,752
They are only halfway into production.
Speeding it will cost a fortune.
505
00:38:22,852 --> 00:38:25,950
Do I look like I give a fuck?
Just get it done..
506
00:38:27,652 --> 00:38:31,612
As some of you will have learned last night:
507
00:38:32,150 --> 00:38:35,652
Teamwork is paramount here at Kingsman.
508
00:38:35,752 --> 00:38:39,158
We are here to enhance your skills,
test you to limits.
509
00:38:39,952 --> 00:38:43,152
Which is why you're gonna pick a puppy.
510
00:38:43,652 --> 00:38:45,448
Wherever you go, your dog goes.
511
00:38:45,473 --> 00:38:47,905
You will care for it,
you will teach it.
512
00:38:47,982 --> 00:38:51,052
And by the time they are fully trained,
so will you be.
513
00:38:51,152 --> 00:38:53,752
Those of you who are still here, that is.
514
00:38:53,852 --> 00:38:55,699
Do you understand?
515
00:38:55,724 --> 00:38:57,776
Choose your puppy.
516
00:39:00,552 --> 00:39:01,552
A poodle?
517
00:39:01,577 --> 00:39:02,384
What?
518
00:39:02,409 --> 00:39:04,600
They are gun dogs.
519
00:39:04,652 --> 00:39:06,519
Oldest working breed.
520
00:39:06,544 --> 00:39:07,876
Easy to train.
521
00:39:09,252 --> 00:39:10,890
A pug?
522
00:39:11,852 --> 00:39:13,945
It's a bulldog, isn't it?
523
00:39:15,719 --> 00:39:17,973
It would get bigger though, wouldn't it?
524
00:39:20,484 --> 00:39:23,151
Ssshhhit
525
00:39:25,352 --> 00:39:28,352
His MRI shows no signs of concussion.
526
00:39:28,752 --> 00:39:31,752
No direct brain trauma at all.
527
00:39:32,052 --> 00:39:33,661
How much longer can he be out?
528
00:39:33,686 --> 00:39:35,776
That's the million-dollar question.
529
00:39:35,852 --> 00:39:37,988
We don't know what he was
exposed to in there.
530
00:39:38,013 --> 00:39:39,376
What about Harry's footage?
531
00:39:39,452 --> 00:39:41,201
It didn't stream to
his home terminal?
532
00:39:41,330 --> 00:39:43,299
Encrypted and uncrackable.
533
00:39:44,352 --> 00:39:46,512
If and when he comes round,
you might wanna have
534
00:39:46,537 --> 00:39:48,476
a word with him about
sharing his password.
535
00:39:48,552 --> 00:39:50,052
Is he gonna be alright?
536
00:39:51,252 --> 00:39:53,699
We need to have patience, Eggsy.
537
00:39:53,724 --> 00:39:55,176
But there is hope. Okay?
538
00:39:55,252 --> 00:39:57,675
If I were you, I'd concentrate
on your training.
539
00:39:57,700 --> 00:39:59,776
Make it through the
test, make him proud.
540
00:40:06,652 --> 00:40:10,352
Come on, J. B. Come on.
541
00:40:13,752 --> 00:40:16,038
I am not coming last cause of you.
542
00:40:16,583 --> 00:40:19,355
J. B, I'll shoot you, goddamn.
I'll fucking shoot you.
543
00:40:20,252 --> 00:40:22,252
Merlin said we're not allowed to hold you.
544
00:40:24,184 --> 00:40:25,456
Bollocks.
545
00:41:08,169 --> 00:41:09,830
Water.
546
00:41:12,361 --> 00:41:13,508
Come on then.
547
00:41:13,609 --> 00:41:14,356
Eggsy, you forget it.
548
00:41:14,381 --> 00:41:16,021
Oh what's wrong mate,
can't take a joke?
549
00:41:16,023 --> 00:41:17,977
Seriously, you'll get turned out and it's
just not worth it.
550
00:41:18,077 --> 00:41:20,023
Maybe I don't give a fuck
about getting kicked out.
551
00:41:20,048 --> 00:41:21,248
Really? Come on, you player.
552
00:41:21,283 --> 00:41:23,283
Charlie, fuck off.
553
00:41:24,833 --> 00:41:26,973
Yeah, go on, walk away.
554
00:41:26,998 --> 00:41:27,998
Dickhead.
555
00:41:29,252 --> 00:41:30,512
Come on, J. B.
556
00:41:30,537 --> 00:41:31,976
It's all right.
557
00:41:45,352 --> 00:41:48,039
You have exactly one hour
to complete the test.
558
00:41:48,050 --> 00:41:49,078
Starting now.
559
00:41:51,552 --> 00:41:55,252
- New target. 800 meters.
- It's unbelievable. You're still here.
560
00:41:55,352 --> 00:41:58,665
Lingering on like some big steaming shit
that just won't flush.
561
00:41:58,835 --> 00:41:59,861
Roger that.
562
00:41:59,886 --> 00:42:02,963
Target identified. And how
about you shut the fuck up.
563
00:42:03,039 --> 00:42:04,079
Positive discrimination.
564
00:42:04,268 --> 00:42:05,327
It's worth it.
565
00:42:05,540 --> 00:42:08,295
Like those fucking steak
cooks who go down seaways
566
00:42:08,320 --> 00:42:10,587
because their mum's a
one-legged lesbian.
567
00:42:10,663 --> 00:42:12,530
You don't know fuck-all about my grades.
568
00:42:12,631 --> 00:42:14,788
Oh forgive me. I'm sure
you're highly educated.
569
00:42:14,813 --> 00:42:15,813
Fire when ready.
570
00:42:17,952 --> 00:42:20,452
How's that for positive discrimination?
571
00:42:32,352 --> 00:42:34,352
I wanna thank you both for listening.
572
00:42:34,452 --> 00:42:37,739
And I really, really appreciate
your traveling all this way,
573
00:42:37,764 --> 00:42:38,876
Your Royal Highness.
574
00:42:38,952 --> 00:42:41,008
And you too, Prime Minister.
575
00:42:41,033 --> 00:42:43,676
I think this is quite brilliant.
576
00:42:44,152 --> 00:42:46,852
It is absolutely brilliant.
577
00:42:47,452 --> 00:42:51,152
You are completely crazy.
578
00:43:02,052 --> 00:43:04,447
I'm sorry, Your Royal Highness...
579
00:43:04,596 --> 00:43:06,397
but you got a big role to play...
580
00:43:06,498 --> 00:43:08,752
in getting the Scandinavian region back on track.
581
00:43:08,852 --> 00:43:10,596
You're popular,
inspirational and
582
00:43:10,621 --> 00:43:12,876
you have the power to
galvanize the people.
583
00:43:13,452 --> 00:43:15,852
Now whether you're on board or not...
584
00:43:15,952 --> 00:43:17,702
I am going to have to insist
585
00:43:17,727 --> 00:43:20,976
on getting you somewhere I
can ensure your safety.
586
00:43:21,052 --> 00:43:23,185
How about you, Prime Minister?
587
00:43:23,210 --> 00:43:24,276
You in or out?
588
00:43:24,352 --> 00:43:26,352
Well, I think it's
about time that
589
00:43:26,377 --> 00:43:28,376
a politician did
something that...
590
00:43:28,952 --> 00:43:31,450
actually made a difference.
591
00:43:31,475 --> 00:43:32,677
Too true.
592
00:43:33,852 --> 00:43:35,452
Take her away.
593
00:43:38,952 --> 00:43:40,019
Drink?
594
00:43:40,044 --> 00:43:42,176
Why not?
595
00:43:44,552 --> 00:43:46,552
Wait, help me.
596
00:43:46,652 --> 00:43:49,352
Do not worry. No harm will come to the princess.
597
00:43:49,452 --> 00:43:53,952
Well I'm Republican anyway,
so it really doesn't matter.
598
00:43:55,152 --> 00:43:56,352
Release the princess.
599
00:44:29,852 --> 00:44:31,131
Okay, you're done.
600
00:44:31,156 --> 00:44:32,576
Not too bad, right?
601
00:44:33,252 --> 00:44:35,130
I hardly felt a thing.
602
00:44:35,155 --> 00:44:36,776
Welcome aboard.
603
00:44:37,252 --> 00:44:39,380
The pleasure is all mine.
604
00:44:45,452 --> 00:44:47,058
Ever heard of knocking?
605
00:44:47,083 --> 00:44:49,876
Only when I'm casing
a place to rob.
606
00:44:50,552 --> 00:44:52,252
Amelia said you wanted to see me.
607
00:44:52,852 --> 00:44:55,252
Hope J. B.'s training is going
as well as yours is.
608
00:44:55,352 --> 00:44:56,486
Sit.
609
00:44:58,352 --> 00:45:01,752
Congratulations on making it
to the final six candidates.
610
00:45:01,852 --> 00:45:04,552
Your test results are even
better than I could've hoped.
611
00:45:06,952 --> 00:45:08,139
Come in.
612
00:45:12,369 --> 00:45:15,028
Eggsy, I need to have a
private conversation.
613
00:45:15,053 --> 00:45:16,093
You're dismissed.
614
00:45:16,344 --> 00:45:20,619
Nonsense, let him observe.
He'd learn a thing or two.
615
00:45:20,752 --> 00:45:23,252
As you wish. Take a look at this.
616
00:45:26,103 --> 00:45:30,103
Fucking hell. That's his... harry.
617
00:45:30,952 --> 00:45:32,299
You blew up his head?
618
00:45:32,324 --> 00:45:33,976
Its a bit much, isn't it?
619
00:45:34,052 --> 00:45:37,752
Actually, the explosion was caused
by an implant in his neck.
620
00:45:37,852 --> 00:45:39,049
Here. Under that scar.
621
00:45:39,074 --> 00:45:42,176
Did my hardware pick up the
signal that triggered it?
622
00:45:42,252 --> 00:45:44,152
Fortunately, yes.
623
00:45:44,252 --> 00:45:45,670
Unfortunately, the IP address
624
00:45:45,695 --> 00:45:48,676
it traced it to is registered
to the Valentine Corporation.
625
00:45:48,752 --> 00:45:51,652
It's not much of a lead.
They have millions of employees worldwide.
626
00:45:51,752 --> 00:45:54,352
No, Richmond Valentine is a genius.
627
00:45:57,330 --> 00:46:00,003
Did you not see his announcement today?
628
00:46:00,452 --> 00:46:01,569
No.
629
00:46:05,652 --> 00:46:07,552
We each spend on average
630
00:46:07,577 --> 00:46:11,376
$2,000 a year on cellphone
and internet usage.
631
00:46:11,452 --> 00:46:15,255
It gives me great
pleasure to announce,
632
00:46:15,280 --> 00:46:17,276
those days are over.
633
00:46:17,352 --> 00:46:22,552
As of tomorrow, every man, woman and child
can claim a free SIM card...
634
00:46:22,652 --> 00:46:26,952
compatible with any cellphone, any computer and...
635
00:46:27,052 --> 00:46:31,152
utilize my communications network
for free.
636
00:46:31,252 --> 00:46:35,752
Free calls. Free internet. For everyone.
637
00:46:36,952 --> 00:46:38,184
Forever.
638
00:46:54,002 --> 00:46:56,693
Valentine's assistant has the same implant scar.
639
00:46:57,066 --> 00:47:00,152
I think Mr. Valentine and I shall have a tête-à-tête.
640
00:47:03,352 --> 00:47:05,952
He's having a gala dinner next week.
641
00:47:06,052 --> 00:47:07,333
I'll get you an invitation.
642
00:47:07,358 --> 00:47:08,876
You need to be careful though.
643
00:47:08,952 --> 00:47:11,112
Since you were out, hundreds of VIPs
have gone missing.
644
00:47:11,212 --> 00:47:13,679
No ransom notes,
exactly like Professor Arnold.
645
00:47:13,952 --> 00:47:16,014
Then I suggest you make my alias
646
00:47:16,039 --> 00:47:17,843
somebody worth kidnapping.
647
00:47:31,752 --> 00:47:33,261
You don’t like heights?
648
00:47:33,286 --> 00:47:35,276
Yes it's okay I've done it before.
649
00:47:35,652 --> 00:47:37,852
Probably alright if I don't think of it.
650
00:47:39,852 --> 00:47:42,852
Hey, you'll be alright,
You're top of the class.
651
00:47:44,652 --> 00:47:48,752
Listen up, your mission is to land in the target
without the radar detecting you.
652
00:47:48,852 --> 00:47:52,866
If I read you on the radar or
you miss the target, you go home.
653
00:47:53,052 --> 00:47:54,552
Is that understood?
654
00:47:57,652 --> 00:48:00,152
Drop zone coming up. 20 seconds.
655
00:48:01,552 --> 00:48:02,752
Here we go.
656
00:48:12,152 --> 00:48:15,362
- I really don't think I can do this.
- Of course you can't.
657
00:48:15,504 --> 00:48:17,352
Get to the back and I'll show you how, yeah.
658
00:48:25,143 --> 00:48:27,343
Eggsy, Eggsy.. wait. Hang on.
659
00:48:27,821 --> 00:48:29,821
Roxy, just stop fucking about.
660
00:48:31,352 --> 00:48:32,852
Follow me, yeah?
661
00:48:49,452 --> 00:48:51,652
Roxy, it's now or never.
662
00:48:52,752 --> 00:48:53,900
Jump.
663
00:49:12,352 --> 00:49:15,432
Good girl, Rox.
I'm glad you made it.
664
00:49:34,252 --> 00:49:35,888
My my, you're all very cheerful.
665
00:49:35,913 --> 00:49:38,776
You really think it was gonna
be that straightforward?
666
00:49:38,852 --> 00:49:41,252
Any idiot can read a heads-up display.
667
00:49:41,352 --> 00:49:43,102
A Kingsman agent
needs to be able
668
00:49:43,127 --> 00:49:44,876
to solve problems
under pressure.
669
00:49:45,652 --> 00:49:49,652
Like what to do when one of your group
has no parachute.
670
00:49:50,452 --> 00:49:53,452
No parachute? Who?
671
00:49:53,760 --> 00:49:55,322
Fuck. Which one?
672
00:49:55,347 --> 00:49:57,103
What do we do?
673
00:49:57,226 --> 00:50:00,452
I told you. Aim for the target
coming under the radar.
674
00:50:00,552 --> 00:50:03,095
And I hope not to be
scraping one of you up.
675
00:50:03,120 --> 00:50:06,057
But if I do have to and
you're inside the target...
676
00:50:06,194 --> 00:50:08,250
means I'll be very impressed.
677
00:50:13,852 --> 00:50:15,852
Everybody listen, I've got a plan.
678
00:50:17,059 --> 00:50:20,138
Pair up. Grab the closest person to you.
679
00:50:22,752 --> 00:50:24,252
Rufus, come on.
680
00:50:24,253 --> 00:50:25,275
Oh fuck.
681
00:50:26,156 --> 00:50:26,976
Rufus!
682
00:50:27,084 --> 00:50:28,400
Oh shit! I can't
683
00:50:32,608 --> 00:50:33,608
Fuck!!!
684
00:50:34,718 --> 00:50:35,452
Fucking cock.
685
00:50:35,688 --> 00:50:37,520
Rufus, you wanker.
686
00:50:38,947 --> 00:50:40,645
We are an odd number now.
687
00:50:40,670 --> 00:50:44,471
- Quick, make a circle.
- Fuck. Right boys. Let's do it.
688
00:50:49,099 --> 00:50:51,099
We'll pull our cords one by one.
689
00:50:51,200 --> 00:50:55,362
When we know who's it, the person
on the right grabs him.
690
00:50:55,386 --> 00:50:57,386
Ok, Eggsy
691
00:50:57,552 --> 00:51:00,752
Good plan, Eggsy. You have 30 seconds.
Come on now. Hurry up.
692
00:51:01,152 --> 00:51:02,752
You first.
693
00:51:02,776 --> 00:51:04,776
Fuck
694
00:51:08,352 --> 00:51:09,880
OK, Me next.
695
00:51:13,639 --> 00:51:15,639
See you on the ground, boys.
696
00:51:18,352 --> 00:51:19,532
Now me.
697
00:51:28,539 --> 00:51:31,448
Roxy, no matter what happens now,
I've got you. Alright?
698
00:51:35,945 --> 00:51:36,545
OK, Eggsy
699
00:51:36,657 --> 00:51:37,578
You first, okay?
700
00:51:37,603 --> 00:51:38,603
Yep
701
00:51:50,513 --> 00:51:52,408
Shit.
702
00:51:59,533 --> 00:52:00,924
Oh Shit.
703
00:52:06,521 --> 00:52:07,521
Rox
704
00:52:27,652 --> 00:52:29,527
Hugo, Digby,
705
00:52:29,527 --> 00:52:32,876
You don't land in the K
then you're not in the K.
706
00:52:33,052 --> 00:52:34,852
Rufus, you opened too soon.
707
00:52:34,877 --> 00:52:36,876
You were all over the radar.
708
00:52:36,952 --> 00:52:38,952
All three of you, pack your bags. Go home.
709
00:52:40,852 --> 00:52:42,989
Eggsy, Roxy, congratulations.
710
00:52:43,014 --> 00:52:45,076
You have set a new record.
711
00:52:45,252 --> 00:52:47,668
Opening at 300 feet,
that's pretty ballsy.
712
00:52:47,693 --> 00:52:50,276
Well done on completing another task.
Follow.
713
00:52:51,444 --> 00:52:54,444
Sorry sir, but why the fuck you choose me as the gimp?
714
00:52:54,780 --> 00:52:57,966
- Am I the expendable candidate?
- No no no. You don't talk to me like that.
715
00:52:58,552 --> 00:53:01,702
If you have a complaint, you came here
and you whisper in my ear.
716
00:53:07,652 --> 00:53:10,319
You need to take that jape off your shoulder.
717
00:53:41,552 --> 00:53:44,552
Mr. DeVere. It's a pleasure to meet you.
718
00:53:44,652 --> 00:53:47,286
I am sorry. I seem to have my dates muddles up.
719
00:53:47,386 --> 00:53:50,352
Oh no no. I canceled the gala because of you.
720
00:53:50,752 --> 00:53:53,002
Anybody willing to
donate that much
721
00:53:53,027 --> 00:53:55,276
deserves their own dinner.
Come in.
722
00:53:56,407 --> 00:53:57,533
Thank you.
723
00:53:59,252 --> 00:54:01,923
Gotta admit, I was really intrigued to meet you.
724
00:54:02,052 --> 00:54:04,086
There are not many
billionaires I do not know.
725
00:54:04,111 --> 00:54:04,976
I don't doubt it.
726
00:54:05,052 --> 00:54:08,017
Obviously, I have had my people
looking into your affairs
727
00:54:08,042 --> 00:54:10,393
and that's some pretty
old money you're from.
728
00:54:10,469 --> 00:54:11,907
How'd your folks make it?
729
00:54:11,932 --> 00:54:14,576
Property, mostly.
Property in the markets.
730
00:54:14,852 --> 00:54:17,352
Nothing personal, if that's your concern.
731
00:54:17,552 --> 00:54:21,152
No, I'm just in to find out what kind of person you are.
I'm sure you understand that.
732
00:54:21,252 --> 00:54:22,182
I most certainly do.
733
00:54:22,207 --> 00:54:23,276
Hope you're hungry.
734
00:54:23,352 --> 00:54:24,466
I'm famished.
735
00:54:24,491 --> 00:54:26,376
Good. Grab a seat.
736
00:54:48,052 --> 00:54:49,628
I'll have the Big Mac, please.
737
00:54:49,653 --> 00:54:50,576
Great choice.
738
00:54:50,652 --> 00:54:54,052
But nothing beats two cheeseburgers
with secret sauce.
739
00:54:54,153 --> 00:54:56,216
Tastes great with
this '45 Lafite.
740
00:54:56,241 --> 00:54:57,478
A classic pairing.
741
00:54:57,552 --> 00:55:01,352
May I suggest Twinkies with
1937 Château d'Yquem for pudding?
742
00:55:01,452 --> 00:55:03,105
I like it
743
00:55:03,592 --> 00:55:06,952
So you want to donate to my foundation?
744
00:55:07,352 --> 00:55:10,552
You are aware that I wind
things down in that area, right?
745
00:55:10,912 --> 00:55:13,912
Climate changes affect us all,
Mr. Valentine.
746
00:55:14,052 --> 00:55:17,052
And you are one of the few powerful people
who seems to share my concerns.
747
00:55:17,152 --> 00:55:20,126
I stepped things down because I wasn't getting anywhere.
748
00:55:20,227 --> 00:55:22,952
Every bit of research kept pointing to the same thing.
749
00:55:23,052 --> 00:55:25,652
The carbon emissions are a red
herring, and we are past the
750
00:55:25,677 --> 00:55:28,276
point of no return no matter
what remedial actions we take.
751
00:55:28,421 --> 00:55:30,088
You know your shit.
752
00:55:30,278 --> 00:55:34,297
I sometimes envy the blissful
ignorance of those less well-versed
753
00:55:34,322 --> 00:55:35,661
in their shit.
754
00:55:36,852 --> 00:55:38,852
As Professor Arnold always said:
755
00:55:38,952 --> 00:55:41,896
"Humankind is the only virus
cursed to live with the
756
00:55:41,921 --> 00:55:44,976
horrifying knowledge of its
host's fragile mortality."
757
00:55:46,052 --> 00:55:48,546
There are not a lot of people who know about him.
758
00:55:51,252 --> 00:55:53,952
Do you like spy movies, Mr. DeVere?
759
00:55:57,352 --> 00:56:00,052
Nowadays, they're all a little
serious for my taste.
760
00:56:00,652 --> 00:56:03,352
But the old ones... marvelous.
761
00:56:03,652 --> 00:56:06,285
Give me a farfetched
theatrical plot any day.
762
00:56:06,290 --> 00:56:08,676
The old Bond movies. Oh, man.
763
00:56:09,752 --> 00:56:13,452
Ah, When I was a kid, that was my dream job.
764
00:56:14,052 --> 00:56:15,952
A gentleman spy.
765
00:56:16,052 --> 00:56:19,648
I always felt the old Bond films were
only as good as the villain.
766
00:56:19,923 --> 00:56:23,923
As a child, I rather fancied
a futuristic colorful megalomaniac.
767
00:56:25,752 --> 00:56:29,013
What a shame we both had to grow up.
768
00:56:33,648 --> 00:56:34,952
Bon appétit.
769
00:56:37,452 --> 00:56:40,552
Just give me a couple of days
to think over your proposal.
770
00:56:40,652 --> 00:56:44,052
I'll have my people get in touch with yours
and it's all good.
771
00:56:44,152 --> 00:56:47,652
Thank you for such a "Happy Meal".
772
00:56:52,852 --> 00:56:55,252
- Well, you want me to follow him?
- Nah.
773
00:56:55,852 --> 00:56:58,052
I put a nano tracker gel in the wine.
774
00:56:58,552 --> 00:57:03,752
We'll know his every move for the next 24 hours.
Finally find out who he works for.
775
00:57:05,952 --> 00:57:08,160
Valentine didn't let
me out of his sight.
776
00:57:08,185 --> 00:57:10,024
All I got was this,
on the way in.
777
00:57:14,752 --> 00:57:18,252
South Glade Mission Church
is a hate group based in Kentucky.
778
00:57:18,552 --> 00:57:20,436
The FBI have been
monitoring them for years.
779
00:57:20,461 --> 00:57:22,176
Do you think Valentine
is a supporter?
780
00:57:22,252 --> 00:57:25,605
No evidence yet of a direct connection,
but I'll keep looking.
781
00:57:26,452 --> 00:57:27,377
Oh, by the way,
782
00:57:27,402 --> 00:57:30,176
the ever-growing list
of missing persons...
783
00:57:30,252 --> 00:57:33,285
Now includes Scandinavian Royalty.
784
00:57:33,452 --> 00:57:36,152
Royal Crown Princess Tilde.
785
00:57:38,252 --> 00:57:41,152
Just let me out, you PSYCHO!
786
00:57:41,252 --> 00:57:44,252
I told you, you're free to go anytime you want.
787
00:57:44,352 --> 00:57:47,277
As long as you agree
to my conditions.
788
00:57:47,302 --> 00:57:48,576
I don't agree.
789
00:57:48,715 --> 00:57:51,644
And I am never ever going to agree!
790
00:57:51,745 --> 00:57:53,151
Enough yet.
791
00:57:53,252 --> 00:57:54,814
Bitch.
792
00:57:58,952 --> 00:58:03,152
The list of missing celebrities and dignitaries
has continued to grow in recent weeks.
793
00:58:03,252 --> 00:58:07,252
And world leaders are coming under increasing
pressure to provide answers.
794
00:58:07,352 --> 00:58:10,552
We are doing everything in our
power to find princess Tilde.
795
00:58:11,352 --> 00:58:15,552
You know, governments and security forces
worldwide are working together...
796
00:58:15,652 --> 00:58:18,325
to find the person behind these abductions.
797
00:58:18,552 --> 00:58:21,644
In other news, people all
over the world continue to
798
00:58:21,669 --> 00:58:24,876
wait in line day and night
to get their free SIM card.
799
00:58:24,952 --> 00:58:27,652
Mrs. P. You get one?
800
00:58:27,752 --> 00:58:30,352
Yeah, I've been queuing up all day.
801
00:58:30,452 --> 00:58:34,852
This unprecedented giveaway
by the philanthropist Richmond Valentine...
802
00:58:34,952 --> 00:58:37,952
has already seen over a billion cards distributed.
803
00:58:38,052 --> 00:58:39,552
At ease.
804
00:58:41,152 --> 00:58:43,692
So you thought you were done for the day, huh?
805
00:58:44,352 --> 00:58:45,852
Probably not.
806
00:58:47,352 --> 00:58:49,852
- A party?
- Tonight. In London.
807
00:58:50,952 --> 00:58:52,652
- Who is this?
- Your target.
808
00:58:52,752 --> 00:58:55,427
Your mission is to use your
NLP Training to win over
809
00:58:55,452 --> 00:58:58,076
the individual in the
photograph in your envelope.
810
00:58:58,152 --> 00:59:01,652
And when I say "win over", I do mean in the Biblical sense.
811
00:59:01,752 --> 00:59:02,981
Easy
812
00:59:03,752 --> 00:59:05,577
Most girls love a bit rough.
813
00:59:05,602 --> 00:59:07,621
We'll see about that, yeah.
814
00:59:07,952 --> 00:59:09,652
Who is that anyway?
815
00:59:15,852 --> 00:59:19,552
I just had to come over and say "Amazing eyes".
816
00:59:19,652 --> 00:59:22,152
- You wearing color contacts?
- No.
817
00:59:22,452 --> 00:59:25,652
- You so are
- Oh my god. 'Negging'. That's hilarious.
818
00:59:25,752 --> 00:59:28,152
I haven't had anyone try
that since the 90s.
819
00:59:28,177 --> 00:59:29,177
Excuse me?
820
00:59:29,352 --> 00:59:31,958
"Negging". Saying something
negative to a pretty
821
00:59:31,983 --> 00:59:34,376
girl in order to undermine
her social value.
822
00:59:34,552 --> 00:59:37,272
Its supposed to make you
want to win his approval.
823
00:59:37,297 --> 00:59:40,176
Absurdly basic neurolinguistic
programming technique.
824
00:59:40,252 --> 00:59:42,435
Is it just me or does this
champagne taste a little bit funny?
825
00:59:42,460 --> 00:59:43,740
That's an acquired
taste, mate.
826
00:59:43,753 --> 00:59:46,352
- I think it's just cheap.
- Get one of these instead. They're delicious.
827
00:59:46,453 --> 00:59:49,556
You know, if you're interested in ornamental
techniques, this guy is textbook.
828
00:59:49,657 --> 00:59:51,721
See what he just did? Its
called an 'opinion opener.
829
00:59:51,746 --> 00:59:53,576
He got you talking with
a neutral question...
830
00:59:53,652 --> 00:59:57,852
got all of us involved in the conversation,
so that you crave individual attention.
831
00:59:57,952 --> 01:00:00,339
Nah, I'm just saying that the
champagne tastes weird...
832
01:00:00,364 --> 01:00:03,176
Lady Sophie, Montague Herring,
phone call for you at reception.
833
01:00:03,252 --> 01:00:06,252
- Be right back.
- See you in a bit, yeah.
834
01:00:06,652 --> 01:00:10,187
- Good job, Rox. I'm feeling a bit rough.
- You alright?
835
01:00:10,288 --> 01:00:11,584
Sorry to eavesdrop...
836
01:00:11,687 --> 01:00:15,147
but there is a much easier way to
guarantee getting someone home.
837
01:00:15,352 --> 01:00:17,052
Rohypnol.
838
01:00:18,952 --> 01:00:21,152
Or even something stronger.
839
01:00:38,491 --> 01:00:40,248
Who the fuck are you?
840
01:00:41,352 --> 01:00:42,852
Where am I?
841
01:00:44,752 --> 01:00:48,072
This knife can save your life.
842
01:00:52,400 --> 01:00:53,400
Fuck
843
01:00:54,000 --> 01:00:56,392
My employer's got two questions for you, Eggsy.
844
01:00:56,652 --> 01:01:00,700
What the fuck is Kingsman?
And who is Harry Hart?
845
01:01:00,800 --> 01:01:02,442
I do not know what the fuck that is.
846
01:01:03,285 --> 01:01:05,220
Oh Eggsy, I just killed
two of your friends
847
01:01:05,245 --> 01:01:07,310
because they gave me the
same bullshit answer.
848
01:01:09,518 --> 01:01:12,004
Just cut the fucking ropes, please.
849
01:01:12,312 --> 01:01:14,445
Eggsy, is the Kingsman worth dying for?
850
01:01:16,866 --> 01:01:18,866
Fuck You
851
01:01:32,552 --> 01:01:33,823
Congratulations.
852
01:01:33,848 --> 01:01:35,276
Bloody well done.
853
01:01:37,444 --> 01:01:40,944
- How'd the others do?
- Roxy passed with flying colors.
854
01:01:41,452 --> 01:01:42,925
Charlie's up next.
855
01:01:42,950 --> 01:01:44,176
Want to watch?
856
01:01:45,252 --> 01:01:46,752
Yeah, alright.
857
01:01:49,052 --> 01:01:51,252
Is Kingsman really worth dying for?
858
01:01:51,352 --> 01:01:54,712
No fuck, it isn't shit
I'll tell all you want, please.
859
01:01:54,952 --> 01:01:56,331
Chester King's Arthur,
860
01:01:56,356 --> 01:01:59,176
head of a spy agency;
It's called Kingsman.
861
01:01:59,252 --> 01:02:02,252
Thank you Charlie. Much appreciated.
862
01:02:02,276 --> 01:02:04,276
Come on, It wasn't the fucking deal
863
01:02:13,952 --> 01:02:16,124
I had such high hopes for you.
864
01:02:16,149 --> 01:02:18,176
You are a bloody disgrace.
865
01:02:18,552 --> 01:02:19,752
I'm so sorry
866
01:02:19,777 --> 01:02:21,576
Please untie me.
867
01:02:21,852 --> 01:02:23,352
Untie yourself.
868
01:02:24,852 --> 01:02:27,552
Arthur, please.
869
01:02:31,398 --> 01:02:33,398
Anyone?...No
870
01:02:33,752 --> 01:02:36,452
Galahad, Percival. Congratulations.
871
01:02:36,552 --> 01:02:39,351
You candidates have reached the
final stage of the testing process.
872
01:02:39,452 --> 01:02:43,247
As tradition allows, you now have
24 hours to spend with them.
873
01:02:43,852 --> 01:02:45,074
Eggsy, you should know
874
01:02:45,099 --> 01:02:46,876
your father reached this point.
875
01:02:47,452 --> 01:02:48,452
From now on,
876
01:02:48,457 --> 01:02:50,976
there are no safety nets.
Understood?
877
01:02:54,452 --> 01:02:55,952
Good. Dismissed.
878
01:02:59,452 --> 01:03:02,152
Charlie, time to go home.
879
01:03:02,176 --> 01:03:03,782
Fuck you
880
01:03:03,783 --> 01:03:05,728
My fucking dad's gonna hear about this.
881
01:03:08,252 --> 01:03:10,252
"To pee or not to pee?"
882
01:03:10,352 --> 01:03:14,902
That was the headline the day after I
diffused a dirty bomb in Paris.
883
01:03:15,452 --> 01:03:18,269
- "Germany 1 - England 5."
- I missed that game.
884
01:03:18,370 --> 01:03:21,412
I was breaking up an undercover spy ring at Pentagon.
885
01:03:26,553 --> 01:03:27,727
My first mission.
886
01:03:27,752 --> 01:03:31,202
I foiled the assassination
of Margaret Thatcher.
887
01:03:31,278 --> 01:03:33,251
Not everybody had thanked you for that one.
888
01:03:33,352 --> 01:03:36,471
The point is, Eggsy, nobody thanked
me for any of them.
889
01:03:36,752 --> 01:03:40,303
Front page news, and all these occasions
were celebrity nonsense.
890
01:03:40,552 --> 01:03:44,268
Because it is the nature of Kingsman that
our achievements remain secret.
891
01:03:44,452 --> 01:03:47,752
A gentleman's name should appear in the
newspaper only three times:
892
01:03:47,852 --> 01:03:50,352
When he's born, when he marries and when he dies.
893
01:03:50,452 --> 01:03:53,852
And we are, first and foremost, gentlemen.
894
01:03:53,952 --> 01:03:55,168
Pretty fucked then.
895
01:03:55,269 --> 01:03:58,800
Its like Charlie said,
I am just a pleb.
896
01:03:58,900 --> 01:04:02,612
Being a gentleman has nothing to do with
the circumstances of one's birth.
897
01:04:02,752 --> 01:04:04,752
Being a gentleman is something one learns.
898
01:04:04,906 --> 01:04:06,906
Yeah, but how?
899
01:04:07,557 --> 01:04:08,813
Alright, first lesson,
900
01:04:08,838 --> 01:04:11,692
you should have asked me
before you took a seat.
901
01:04:13,161 --> 01:04:14,295
Second lesson,
902
01:04:14,320 --> 01:04:16,725
how to make a proper martini.
903
01:04:16,745 --> 01:04:19,149
Yes, Harry.
904
01:04:22,547 --> 01:04:25,675
Goddamn it. It fucking hurts.
905
01:04:25,853 --> 01:04:28,301
You are the one who asked for
a biometric security system.
906
01:04:28,326 --> 01:04:29,777
What's wrong with
a simple switch?
907
01:04:29,852 --> 01:04:31,227
A simple switch?
908
01:04:31,252 --> 01:04:34,776
This is an extremely
dangerous machine.
909
01:04:34,852 --> 01:04:39,352
It should only be operated by someone
responsible and sane as me.
910
01:04:39,552 --> 01:04:42,540
Bad shit can happen
if it falls into the wrong hands.
911
01:04:43,052 --> 01:04:44,852
SYNC MAIN TERMINAL
912
01:04:45,152 --> 01:04:48,483
- Are we done here? Shit
- No, now this one,
913
01:04:48,508 --> 01:04:50,676
for the test of the church.
914
01:04:50,752 --> 01:04:54,752
This one just has a short range.
A simple switch will do.
915
01:05:00,452 --> 01:05:03,330
So you gonna teach me how to talk proper
like in 'My Fair Lady'?
916
01:05:03,452 --> 01:05:04,477
That'd be absurd.
917
01:05:04,502 --> 01:05:07,576
Being a gentleman has nothing
to do with one's accent.
918
01:05:07,752 --> 01:05:10,252
Its about being at ease in one's own skin.
919
01:05:10,352 --> 01:05:14,683
As Hemingway said:"There is nothing noble
in being superior to your fellow man."
920
01:05:14,852 --> 01:05:18,848
"True nobility is being superior
to your former self."
921
01:05:23,152 --> 01:05:25,433
Now, the first thing every gentleman
needs is a good suit.
922
01:05:25,552 --> 01:05:28,852
By which I mean a bespoke suit.
Never off the peg.
923
01:05:28,952 --> 01:05:31,348
And Kingsman suits are
always bulletproof,
924
01:05:31,373 --> 01:05:32,876
So let's get you measured.
925
01:05:32,952 --> 01:05:35,775
And whether you get the job
or not, you will have a
926
01:05:35,800 --> 01:05:38,676
lasting and useful memento
of your time at Kingsman.
927
01:05:38,952 --> 01:05:42,652
I'm so sorry, sir, but a gentleman
is completing his fitting.
928
01:05:42,952 --> 01:05:44,734
Fitting Room 2 is available.
929
01:05:44,759 --> 01:05:47,176
One does not use
Fitting Room 2...
930
01:05:47,252 --> 01:05:49,802
when one is popping one's cherry.
931
01:05:50,252 --> 01:05:53,752
Perhaps I'll show you Fitting Room 3, while we wait.
932
01:06:03,352 --> 01:06:05,852
- So we going up or down?
- Neither.
933
01:06:07,252 --> 01:06:11,452
- Is this it?
- Of course not. Pull the hook on your left.
934
01:06:18,574 --> 01:06:19,912
Oh, Yes
935
01:06:19,952 --> 01:06:22,452
Very very nice.
936
01:06:25,352 --> 01:06:27,852
You're going to need a pair of shoes
to go with your suit.
937
01:06:27,952 --> 01:06:32,052
An Oxford is any formal shoe,
with open lacing.
938
01:06:32,152 --> 01:06:35,352
This additional decorative piece is called broguing.
939
01:06:35,452 --> 01:06:38,811
- "Oxford's, not brogue's."
- Words to live by, Eggsy.
940
01:06:38,836 --> 01:06:39,976
Words to live by.
941
01:06:40,452 --> 01:06:41,652
Try a pair.
942
01:06:41,881 --> 01:06:44,000
Your weapon scores are excellent, by the way.
943
01:06:44,752 --> 01:06:46,299
These you're familiar with.
944
01:06:46,488 --> 01:06:48,352
And this is our standard issue pistol.
945
01:06:48,452 --> 01:06:50,913
Its quite unique. As you all
see it, it also fires a
946
01:06:50,938 --> 01:06:53,676
shotgun cartridge for use in
messy close-range situations.
947
01:06:53,752 --> 01:06:56,587
How do they feel? Now do your
very best in impersonation
948
01:06:56,612 --> 01:06:58,776
of a German aristocrat's
formal greeting.
949
01:07:02,152 --> 01:07:03,352
No, Eggsy.
950
01:07:07,152 --> 01:07:08,652
That is sick.
951
01:07:09,552 --> 01:07:11,566
In the old days, they had a phone in the heel as well.
952
01:07:11,693 --> 01:07:12,862
How do I get it back in?
953
01:07:12,963 --> 01:07:15,677
It is coated with one
of the fastest-acting
954
01:07:15,702 --> 01:07:18,476
neurotoxins known to
man, so very carefully.
955
01:07:21,752 --> 01:07:24,252
I had a lot of fun with this.
956
01:07:24,352 --> 01:07:27,052
One of our finest examples of chemical engineering.
957
01:07:27,652 --> 01:07:29,703
Poison. Harmless when ingested.
958
01:07:29,728 --> 01:07:32,176
But at a time,
convenient to you...
959
01:07:32,252 --> 01:07:35,252
it can be remotely activated.
960
01:07:35,452 --> 01:07:36,552
Primed.
961
01:07:37,639 --> 01:07:38,752
Lethal.
962
01:07:40,052 --> 01:07:43,462
And what about these? What do these do?
Electrocute you?
963
01:07:43,563 --> 01:07:46,206
- Don't be ridiculous. It's a hand grenade.
- Shut up...
964
01:07:46,307 --> 01:07:48,852
If you want to electrocute someone,
you'll need a signet ring.
965
01:07:48,952 --> 01:07:51,759
A gentleman traditionally wears
the signet on his left hand, but
966
01:07:51,784 --> 01:07:54,375
a Kingsman wears it on whatever
hand happens to be dominant.
967
01:07:54,513 --> 01:07:57,452
If you touch the contact behind the ring,
it delivers 50,000 volts.
968
01:07:58,852 --> 01:08:01,652
And what about them? What makes them so special?
969
01:08:01,952 --> 01:08:04,952
Nothing. That technology is caught up
with the spy world.
970
01:08:06,752 --> 01:08:08,447
Put it back, Eggsy.
971
01:08:11,552 --> 01:08:14,052
Perfect timing. Gentleman's just finished.
972
01:08:18,952 --> 01:08:20,452
Mr. DeVere.
973
01:08:21,852 --> 01:08:23,684
What a coincidence.
974
01:08:23,709 --> 01:08:27,276
You're totally the
reason I'm here.
975
01:08:27,352 --> 01:08:32,324
When you left my house, I was searching
for that dope-ass smoking jacket you had on.
976
01:08:32,425 --> 01:08:36,252
And since I'm going as Royal Ascot,
apparently you need one of these penguin suits...
977
01:08:36,752 --> 01:08:39,452
Here I am. What are you doing here?
978
01:08:39,752 --> 01:08:42,152
What's up man? Richmond Valentine.
979
01:08:42,552 --> 01:08:45,634
This is my new valet.
I was just introducing him to my tailor.
980
01:08:45,735 --> 01:08:48,552
Another coincidence. So am I.
981
01:08:49,052 --> 01:08:52,252
- Did you have any chance to think further on my proposal?
- Most definitely.
982
01:08:52,552 --> 01:08:55,852
My people will be getting in
touch with you very soon.
983
01:08:55,877 --> 01:08:56,976
I guarantee it.
984
01:08:57,852 --> 01:09:02,015
A word of advice: Ascot requires top hat.
985
01:09:02,752 --> 01:09:06,502
I might suggest Lock & Co.
Hatters,
986
01:09:06,527 --> 01:09:07,776
St. James.
987
01:09:07,852 --> 01:09:10,047
"Lox", as in smoked fish?
988
01:09:10,072 --> 01:09:12,002
As in "locked up".
989
01:09:14,952 --> 01:09:18,087
I have trouble understanding you people sometimes.
990
01:09:18,552 --> 01:09:20,952
You all talk so funny.
991
01:09:27,552 --> 01:09:30,684
Gentlemen, would you look after him please?
992
01:09:43,252 --> 01:09:46,252
Now this is a dope-ass top hat.
993
01:09:48,252 --> 01:09:51,452
Gazelle, lets go Ascotting.
994
01:09:52,952 --> 01:09:56,952
Your hat is fine Bill, come on.
Don't make me late for the queen.
995
01:09:57,952 --> 01:10:00,452
Come on, Gazelle. We're gonna be late.
996
01:10:00,852 --> 01:10:03,852
How far is Ascot? How far?
997
01:10:08,052 --> 01:10:10,302
Merlin said you wanted
to see me, sir?
998
01:10:10,327 --> 01:10:11,327
Sit down.
999
01:10:16,552 --> 01:10:19,552
Pretty dog. What's his name?
1000
01:10:19,652 --> 01:10:20,506
J.B.
1001
01:10:20,506 --> 01:10:22,917
- As in "James Bond"?
- No.
1002
01:10:23,152 --> 01:10:27,352
- "Jason Bourne"?
- No. Jack Bauer.
1003
01:10:28,943 --> 01:10:30,052
Bravo.
1004
01:10:30,652 --> 01:10:33,347
It pains me to admit it,
Eggsy, but I think that
1005
01:10:33,372 --> 01:10:36,176
one day you might be as
good a spy as any of them.
1006
01:10:43,652 --> 01:10:45,213
Take it.
1007
01:10:52,052 --> 01:10:53,252
Shoot the dog.
1008
01:11:00,052 --> 01:11:01,752
This weapon is live.
1009
01:11:04,652 --> 01:11:05,852
Shoot the dog.
1010
01:11:44,152 --> 01:11:45,652
Give me the gun.
1011
01:11:56,452 --> 01:11:58,652
At least the girl's got balls,
1012
01:12:02,052 --> 01:12:03,127
Get out.
1013
01:12:03,152 --> 01:12:05,776
I knew you couldn't make it.
1014
01:12:09,152 --> 01:12:10,652
Go home.
1015
01:12:12,152 --> 01:12:14,852
Merlin, send in Roxy, please.
1016
01:12:38,652 --> 01:12:43,652
Welcome to Kingsman, Lancelot.
1017
01:13:09,952 --> 01:13:13,152
Oh god, I've been so worried about you.
1018
01:13:15,052 --> 01:13:18,497
Oh my Dais, look how big you've got.
1019
01:13:24,352 --> 01:13:25,630
- Where is he?
- I am fine.
1020
01:13:25,655 --> 01:13:28,211
Eggsy, please please, just
don't get involved...
1021
01:13:28,287 --> 01:13:31,427
No, I should never have
left you on your own.
1022
01:13:31,452 --> 01:13:32,885
This stops right now.
1023
01:13:32,909 --> 01:13:34,000
Be right back.
1024
01:13:39,747 --> 01:13:42,247
Oh Mugsy, so you're back?
1025
01:13:42,347 --> 01:13:44,297
You nicked a fucking taxi now?
1026
01:13:45,352 --> 01:13:48,016
Yeah. Can I have a word about my mom's
black eye?
1027
01:13:48,616 --> 01:13:50,543
You wanna have a word with
me, you get out of that cab,
1028
01:13:50,568 --> 01:13:52,965
I'll knock you straight back
down on your fucking arse.
1029
01:13:54,952 --> 01:13:57,999
Tell your muppets to go inside,
then I'll get out.
1030
01:13:59,252 --> 01:14:03,513
Go on lads. There'll be two hits:
Me and him and then he and the floor.
1031
01:14:03,952 --> 01:14:08,452
Come on in, you prick.
Let's see what you got, eh.
1032
01:14:08,552 --> 01:14:09,732
What are you doing?
1033
01:14:10,939 --> 01:14:12,800
Remote car.
What are you doing?
1034
01:14:13,091 --> 01:14:14,443
Now you've gone all bollocks.
1035
01:14:15,466 --> 01:14:17,278
Come on, he'll beat my fucking mother.
1036
01:14:17,379 --> 01:14:19,783
Come back when you've grown a pair. Mugsy.
1037
01:14:43,075 --> 01:14:44,207
You throw away
1038
01:14:44,232 --> 01:14:46,042
your biggest opportunity
1039
01:14:46,066 --> 01:14:47,649
over a fucking dog.
1040
01:14:47,701 --> 01:14:51,058
And then you humiliate me
by stealing my boss's car.
1041
01:14:51,220 --> 01:14:54,339
You shot a dog just
to get a fucking job?
1042
01:14:54,364 --> 01:14:55,403
Yes, I did.
1043
01:14:57,952 --> 01:15:01,591
Mr Pickle here reminds me of that
every time I take a shit.
1044
01:15:03,252 --> 01:15:05,752
You shot your dog
and had it stuffed?
1045
01:15:06,207 --> 01:15:07,651
You fucking freak.
1046
01:15:07,752 --> 01:15:08,699
No. I shot my dog and
1047
01:15:08,724 --> 01:15:10,819
then I brought him home
and continued to care
1048
01:15:10,845 --> 01:15:13,776
for him for the next eleven years
until he died of pancreatitis.
1049
01:15:14,852 --> 01:15:17,349
- What?
- It was a blank, Eggsy.
1050
01:15:17,917 --> 01:15:19,917
It was a fucking blank.
1051
01:15:20,222 --> 01:15:22,124
Remember Amelia?
1052
01:15:22,148 --> 01:15:22,751
Yeah
1053
01:15:22,752 --> 01:15:27,052
She didn't drown. She works in our tech
department in Berlin. She's fine.
1054
01:15:27,152 --> 01:15:31,152
Limits must be tested. A Kingsman only condones the
risking of a life to save another.
1055
01:15:31,252 --> 01:15:34,351
As my father saved your life
even though your fuck-up cost his?
1056
01:15:34,452 --> 01:15:36,781
What you've get him stuffed here also?
1057
01:15:38,152 --> 01:15:41,352
Can't you see that everything I have done
has been about trying to repay him?
1058
01:15:46,952 --> 01:15:48,082
Harry, listen to this.
1059
01:15:48,107 --> 01:15:50,573
Valentine's alarm is
saying something of note.
1060
01:15:50,952 --> 01:15:53,284
You know what I love about pen and paper?
1061
01:15:53,652 --> 01:15:56,152
Nobody can hack into this shit.
1062
01:15:56,652 --> 01:15:59,852
Our worldwide tour was a complete success.
1063
01:16:00,152 --> 01:16:02,638
We have total coverall.
1064
01:16:02,738 --> 01:16:06,485
- Like when all your numbers in bingo are crossed out.
- Bingo!
1065
01:16:06,905 --> 01:16:10,827
Bingo, the game.
You have played Bingo, right?
1066
01:16:10,952 --> 01:16:12,952
Do I look like I play bingo?
1067
01:16:14,940 --> 01:16:16,106
Point is...
1068
01:16:16,652 --> 01:16:20,852
if our tests go well at church tomorrow,
we are good to go.
1069
01:16:21,152 --> 01:16:23,817
South Glade Mission Church.
1070
01:16:24,652 --> 01:16:26,852
- Merlin, get the plane ready.
- Will do
1071
01:16:26,952 --> 01:16:29,652
- I am so sorry. I'm gonna do..
- You should be.
1072
01:16:29,852 --> 01:16:32,552
You stay right there.
I'll sort this mess out when I get back.
1073
01:16:35,230 --> 01:16:38,749
"Kentucky, U.S.A"
1074
01:16:39,317 --> 01:16:41,750
And I say to you: Bear witness.
1075
01:16:41,996 --> 01:16:45,136
Watch the news. Watch the news.
1076
01:16:45,237 --> 01:16:50,001
AIDS, floods
The blood of the innocents spilled.
1077
01:16:50,102 --> 01:16:55,102
And yet there are those
who doubt this is the wrath of God.
1078
01:16:57,202 --> 01:17:00,702
Our filthy government condones sodomy.
1079
01:17:01,002 --> 01:17:03,502
Divorce, abortion.
1080
01:17:03,902 --> 01:17:06,482
And yet some still doubt,
1081
01:17:06,507 --> 01:17:10,325
this is the work
of the Antichrist.
1082
01:17:10,639 --> 01:17:14,869
You do not have to be a Jew, a nigger, a whore...
1083
01:17:14,969 --> 01:17:18,564
or an atheistic science loving evolution spouter.
1084
01:17:18,730 --> 01:17:20,027
Charming sermon.
1085
01:17:20,052 --> 01:17:22,140
Can you see Valentine anywhere?
1086
01:17:22,319 --> 01:17:27,019
So my friends, although he is a just God,
he is justly...
1087
01:17:27,190 --> 01:17:30,007
The One and there will be no turning back
1088
01:17:31,852 --> 01:17:33,229
Are you sure we
are out of range?
1089
01:17:33,254 --> 01:17:35,076
We're over a 1000 feet away.
What's wrong?
1090
01:17:35,152 --> 01:17:38,152
- What if the calculations are wrong?
- You just have to trust me.
1091
01:17:39,330 --> 01:17:41,900
Jews, nigger, fag lovers.
1092
01:17:42,052 --> 01:17:45,552
And the devil is burning them for all eternity.
1093
01:17:45,652 --> 01:17:46,852
Excuse me.
1094
01:17:47,852 --> 01:17:49,374
Where are you going?
1095
01:17:49,399 --> 01:17:51,376
Hey, what's your problem?
1096
01:17:52,590 --> 01:17:55,516
I am a Catholic whore,
currently enjoying congress
1097
01:17:55,541 --> 01:17:58,351
out of wedlock with my
black Jewish boyfriend...
1098
01:17:58,427 --> 01:18:00,867
who works in a military abortion clinic.
1099
01:18:01,052 --> 01:18:04,677
So hail Satan. And have a lovely afternoon, madam.
1100
01:18:08,043 --> 01:18:11,043
Oh shit, he's leaving. I'm starting the test now.
1101
01:18:11,475 --> 01:18:13,852
Hope enough of these freaks have our SIM cards.
1102
01:18:18,350 --> 01:18:20,350
...ask you to sit down...
1103
01:18:20,451 --> 01:18:23,592
Leave this church like the infidel you are.
1104
01:18:27,652 --> 01:18:32,452
You will eat your babies.
You will drown in the blood of the Lord.
1105
01:18:32,552 --> 01:18:34,746
He will cast.
1106
01:18:40,798 --> 01:18:42,030
Holy fuck.
1107
01:18:43,248 --> 01:18:45,621
Shit, I can't watch this. Get over here.
1108
01:19:28,500 --> 01:19:30,500
Jesus...
1109
01:19:30,552 --> 01:19:32,752
Galahad, can you hear me?
1110
01:19:33,252 --> 01:19:36,452
Harry, Harry.. what the heck is going on?
1111
01:19:38,252 --> 01:19:39,572
Just turn the volume down please.
1112
01:19:40,852 --> 01:19:42,560
I didn't expect it to
be that effective.
1113
01:19:42,585 --> 01:19:44,376
What kind of response
are we talking of?
1114
01:19:44,852 --> 01:19:46,052
100%.
1115
01:19:47,052 --> 01:19:50,252
So everyone's been infected
Whether they have SIM card or not?
1116
01:19:50,452 --> 01:19:52,952
And its added benefit of wiping out the Kingsman.
1117
01:19:53,352 --> 01:19:55,001
Not yet.
1118
01:20:49,952 --> 01:20:51,652
Oh you need to see this.
1119
01:22:48,252 --> 01:22:52,222
What did you do to me?
I had no control.
1120
01:22:53,452 --> 01:22:55,652
I killed all those people.
1121
01:22:56,852 --> 01:22:59,352
- I wanted to.
- Clever, isn't it?
1122
01:22:59,452 --> 01:23:02,645
In simple terms, its a
neurological wave that triggers
1123
01:23:02,670 --> 01:23:05,862
the centers of aggression
and switches off inhibitor.
1124
01:23:05,952 --> 01:23:09,452
Transmitted through your nasty free SIM cards, I assume?
1125
01:23:12,652 --> 01:23:14,378
You know what this is like?
1126
01:23:14,552 --> 01:23:17,952
Its like those old movies we both love.
1127
01:23:18,052 --> 01:23:20,252
Now I'm gonna tell you my whole plan...
1128
01:23:20,352 --> 01:23:24,252
and then I'm gonna come up with some
absurd, convoluted way to kill you...
1129
01:23:24,352 --> 01:23:27,452
and then you'll find an equally
convoluted way to escape.
1130
01:23:28,252 --> 01:23:29,752
That sounds good to me.
1131
01:23:30,552 --> 01:23:32,552
Well, this ain't that kind of movie.
1132
01:23:36,980 --> 01:23:38,980
No
1133
01:23:46,952 --> 01:23:48,713
Is he dead?
1134
01:23:48,852 --> 01:23:51,332
That's usually what happens when
you shoot someone in the head.
1135
01:23:51,352 --> 01:23:55,816
- It feels good, Right?
- No no, it does not feel good. It felt fucking awful.
1136
01:23:56,152 --> 01:23:58,702
What? You just killed how
many people in that church.
1137
01:23:58,727 --> 01:23:59,576
This is one guy.
1138
01:23:59,652 --> 01:24:01,852
No..No... No, they killed each other.
1139
01:24:04,152 --> 01:24:06,683
Okay, send off the
countdown clock
1140
01:24:06,708 --> 01:24:08,676
This party starts tomorrow.
1141
01:24:43,352 --> 01:24:44,807
Arthur?
1142
01:24:46,852 --> 01:24:50,552
- Are you there?
- Sadly, I am.
1143
01:24:51,152 --> 01:24:54,145
Assemble the Kingsman.
1144
01:24:58,652 --> 01:25:02,675
Can't you see that everything I have done
has been about trying to repay him?
1145
01:25:23,044 --> 01:25:25,230
I see a young man
with potential,
1146
01:25:25,255 --> 01:25:28,276
who wants to do something
good with his life.
1147
01:25:37,000 --> 01:25:39,000
Kingsman
1148
01:25:45,452 --> 01:25:47,952
Arthur, Harry is dead.
1149
01:25:48,552 --> 01:25:50,502
Galahad is dead.
1150
01:25:51,052 --> 01:25:54,052
Hence, we have just drunk a toast to him.
1151
01:25:54,152 --> 01:25:56,768
Well then you know what that psycho's doing.
1152
01:25:56,869 --> 01:25:59,453
How many people in the world have got those SIM cards?
1153
01:25:59,552 --> 01:26:01,322
Valentine can send a signal
to any of them.
1154
01:26:01,347 --> 01:26:04,575
All of them. If they all go homicidal at
the same time, then..
1155
01:26:04,652 --> 01:26:06,943
Indeed, and thanks to
Galahad recordings
1156
01:26:07,068 --> 01:26:09,300
we have Valentine's confession.
1157
01:26:09,552 --> 01:26:13,052
The intelligence has been passed on to the
relevant authorities.
1158
01:26:13,252 --> 01:26:14,752
Our work is complete.
1159
01:26:14,777 --> 01:26:19,276
And a most distinguished legacy
for our fallen friend it is too.
1160
01:26:20,052 --> 01:26:21,252
And that's it?
1161
01:26:22,252 --> 01:26:23,952
Come sit down, boy.
1162
01:26:26,852 --> 01:26:32,052
This is an 1815 Napoleonic brandy.
1163
01:26:32,952 --> 01:26:36,852
And we only drink it
when we lose a Kingsman.
1164
01:26:36,952 --> 01:26:39,723
Galahad was very fond of you.
1165
01:26:41,952 --> 01:26:45,952
And on this occasion, I think it is
acceptable for us...
1166
01:26:46,952 --> 01:26:48,652
to bend the rules a little.
1167
01:26:50,152 --> 01:26:53,652
- These are all Kingsmen?
- Yes, our founder members.
1168
01:26:55,352 --> 01:26:57,852
I want you to join me in a toast.
1169
01:26:59,752 --> 01:27:00,952
To Galahad.
1170
01:27:03,509 --> 01:27:05,509
To Galahad.
1171
01:27:08,752 --> 01:27:11,835
Harry said you don't like
to break the rules, often.
1172
01:27:11,860 --> 01:27:12,887
Why now?
1173
01:27:13,025 --> 01:27:14,708
You're very good, Eggsy.
1174
01:27:14,733 --> 01:27:18,870
Perhaps I'll make you my
proposal for Galahad's position.
1175
01:27:19,052 --> 01:27:21,511
Provided we can see eye to eye
1176
01:27:21,536 --> 01:27:24,076
on certain political matters.
1177
01:27:26,952 --> 01:27:28,891
Can you guess..
1178
01:27:28,916 --> 01:27:31,004
What this is?
1179
01:27:31,360 --> 01:27:33,421
I don't have to.
Harry showed it.
1180
01:27:33,446 --> 01:27:34,718
You click it, I die.
1181
01:27:34,852 --> 01:27:37,052
I thought that brandy tasted a bit shit.
1182
01:27:38,448 --> 01:27:39,552
Bravo.
1183
01:27:39,852 --> 01:27:43,052
Valentine won you over. Somehow
1184
01:27:43,252 --> 01:27:46,252
Once he explained, I understood.
1185
01:27:46,352 --> 01:27:48,852
When you get a virus, you get a fever.
1186
01:27:49,152 --> 01:27:52,945
That's the human body raising its
core temperature to kill the virus.
1187
01:27:53,352 --> 01:27:57,852
Planet Earth works the same way:
Global warming is the fever...
1188
01:27:57,952 --> 01:28:00,012
Mankind is the virus.
1189
01:28:00,037 --> 01:28:03,176
We are making our planet sick.
1190
01:28:03,452 --> 01:28:05,934
A cull is our only hope.
1191
01:28:06,052 --> 01:28:08,755
If we do not reduce our
population ourselves,
1192
01:28:08,780 --> 01:28:10,777
there's only two
ways this can go:
1193
01:28:11,352 --> 01:28:15,352
The host kills the virus,
or the virus kills the host.
1194
01:28:15,852 --> 01:28:18,743
- Either way...
- The result is the same:
1195
01:28:19,352 --> 01:28:21,552
The virus dies.
1196
01:28:22,352 --> 01:28:25,693
So Valentine's gonna take care
of the population problem himself.
1197
01:28:25,952 --> 01:28:28,552
If we don't do something, Nature will.
1198
01:28:28,652 --> 01:28:32,652
Sometimes a culling is the only way to
ensure that this species survives.
1199
01:28:33,652 --> 01:28:38,552
And History will see Valentine as the man
who saved humanity from extinction.
1200
01:28:38,652 --> 01:28:41,652
And he gets to pick and choose who gets culled, does he?
1201
01:28:42,052 --> 01:28:46,132
All his rich mates, they get to live. And then when he
thinks its worth saving, he's keeping them safe.
1202
01:28:46,352 --> 01:28:50,852
- Whether they agree with him or not.
- And you, Eggsy.
1203
01:28:51,152 --> 01:28:57,615
In Harry's honor, I am inviting you to
be part of a new world.
1204
01:29:00,052 --> 01:29:02,752
It's time to make your decision.
1205
01:29:09,252 --> 01:29:12,027
I would rather be with Harry.
1206
01:29:12,052 --> 01:29:13,052
Thanks.
1207
01:29:13,352 --> 01:29:14,552
So be it.
1208
01:29:31,152 --> 01:29:34,060
The problem with us
common types is,
1209
01:29:34,085 --> 01:29:36,285
that we are light fingered.
1210
01:29:37,252 --> 01:29:38,980
Kingsman's taught me a lot.
1211
01:29:39,005 --> 01:29:40,476
But slight of hand...
1212
01:29:40,952 --> 01:29:42,652
Yes, they're our our founder members.
1213
01:29:45,261 --> 01:29:47,152
...I had that done already.
1214
01:29:49,892 --> 01:29:54,198
You dirty little fucking prick.
1215
01:30:20,152 --> 01:30:23,352
1216
01:30:28,552 --> 01:30:33,239
It's okay, Lancelot. Put it down.
It's verified.
1217
01:30:35,352 --> 01:30:37,389
Arthur's phone's just
received an update text about
1218
01:30:37,414 --> 01:30:39,176
getting to safety. We
don't have a lot time.
1219
01:30:39,252 --> 01:30:42,017
- What you gonna do?
- The question is what we gonna do.
1220
01:30:42,352 --> 01:30:44,852
God knows who's in Valentine's
pocket and who's not.
1221
01:30:45,752 --> 01:30:47,279
We've no choice.
1222
01:30:48,252 --> 01:30:50,452
We are gonna have to deal with this ourselves.
1223
01:30:53,796 --> 01:30:55,033
Follow me.
1224
01:31:14,493 --> 01:31:18,151
- The fuck is this?
- I have no idea.
1225
01:31:18,252 --> 01:31:19,586
What you're playing with...
1226
01:31:19,687 --> 01:31:22,444
is a prototype personal trans-atmospheric vehicle.
1227
01:31:22,545 --> 01:31:25,596
It was developed as part of
Reagan's Star Wars project.
1228
01:31:25,621 --> 01:31:27,975
Its pretty basic, but
it should still work.
1229
01:31:28,120 --> 01:31:30,552
We're going to take out one of Valentine's satellites.
1230
01:31:30,852 --> 01:31:33,352
We're gonna break the chain. Stop the signal.
1231
01:31:33,552 --> 01:31:35,552
It will take him a couple of hours to reboot it.
1232
01:31:35,752 --> 01:31:39,922
Which buys us enough time for you to get me
into Valentine's mainframe...
1233
01:31:40,022 --> 01:31:42,022
so I can shut it down.
1234
01:31:42,361 --> 01:31:46,352
Lancelot, you are going to be using it.
Get into your halo suit.
1235
01:31:55,352 --> 01:31:57,852
Swedish Air Force
1236
01:31:58,334 --> 01:32:01,152
The Swedish Prime Minister requesting
permission to land.
1237
01:32:06,352 --> 01:32:08,244
Permission granted.
1238
01:32:11,952 --> 01:32:13,952
- Please.
- Thank you.
1239
01:32:14,452 --> 01:32:18,126
- So how many more are we expecting?
- Not many. Most have their own bunkers.
1240
01:32:18,452 --> 01:32:21,439
I figure we're just getting really nervous once.
1241
01:32:21,952 --> 01:32:23,652
Welcome, Prime Minister.
1242
01:32:25,252 --> 01:32:28,552
It seems the implant can emit
some kind of counter signal...
1243
01:32:28,652 --> 01:32:32,040
to ensure the wearer remains unaffected
by the waves from the SIM card.
1244
01:32:32,252 --> 01:32:34,452
The waves that turns everyone into a psycho killer?
1245
01:32:34,552 --> 01:32:37,105
Quite. But what they probably didn't
tell anyone...
1246
01:32:37,306 --> 01:32:41,229
Is that it can also super heat
their soft tissue at his command.
1247
01:32:41,552 --> 01:32:45,621
Valentine's selected his chosen few
to get the countdown warning.
1248
01:32:46,052 --> 01:32:48,892
He had to be sure that it didn't
blow up to the wrong people beforehand.
1249
01:32:48,952 --> 01:32:50,895
And how does this help us right now?
1250
01:32:51,852 --> 01:32:54,552
It doesn't. Roxy, here we go.
1251
01:33:07,252 --> 01:33:10,512
The higher you go,
The more the balloons expand.
1252
01:33:10,952 --> 01:33:14,452
When you reach the edge of the atmosphere,
they will explode.
1253
01:33:15,152 --> 01:33:17,518
You need to deploy your missile
just before that, okay?
1254
01:33:17,543 --> 01:33:18,810
The edge of the atmosphere.
1255
01:33:18,952 --> 01:33:22,152
And once you've deployed, you'll need
to release for descent fast.
1256
01:33:23,152 --> 01:33:24,393
Good luck.
1257
01:33:26,652 --> 01:33:28,246
You can do this, okay?
1258
01:33:28,890 --> 01:33:31,687
Eggsy, come on.
Time is not our friend.
1259
01:33:54,352 --> 01:33:57,652
Getting in with Arthur's invitation,
you gonna need to blend in.
1260
01:33:57,752 --> 01:34:01,472
- I'm supposed to be Arthur?
- His invitation's in his phone.
1261
01:34:01,601 --> 01:34:04,052
Give them this and give
his real name: Chester King.
1262
01:34:04,252 --> 01:34:06,752
- And what about you?
- I'm the pilot. I'm gonna stay here.
1263
01:34:07,452 --> 01:34:08,986
Is that gonna fit me?
1264
01:34:09,011 --> 01:34:11,274
A bespoke suit always fits.
1265
01:34:11,552 --> 01:34:14,177
Just be grateful Harry
had it made for you.
1266
01:34:14,202 --> 01:34:15,202
Get dressed.
1267
01:34:16,952 --> 01:34:18,139
The fuck's wrong with them?
1268
01:34:18,164 --> 01:34:20,976
I don't know. Could have something
to do with mass genocide?
1269
01:34:21,052 --> 01:34:23,138
Give me the mic.
1270
01:34:26,552 --> 01:34:28,052
Everybody listen up.
1271
01:34:29,548 --> 01:34:31,958
What the fuck wrong with you people?
1272
01:34:32,152 --> 01:34:37,652
I just want to remind you that today
is a day of celebration.
1273
01:34:38,552 --> 01:34:42,066
We must put aside
all thoughts of death,
1274
01:34:42,091 --> 01:34:44,310
and focus on birth.
1275
01:34:44,576 --> 01:34:48,391
The birth of a new age.
1276
01:34:48,752 --> 01:34:52,952
We mustn't mourn those who
give their lives today.
1277
01:34:53,752 --> 01:34:56,152
We should honor their sacrifice.
1278
01:34:56,252 --> 01:34:58,152
She got my number to call me back...?
1279
01:34:58,252 --> 01:35:01,952
And their role in saving
the human race.
1280
01:35:03,810 --> 01:35:08,792
We must put aside doubts and guilts.
1281
01:35:09,052 --> 01:35:13,252
You are the chosen people.
1282
01:35:14,152 --> 01:35:19,152
When folks tell their kids the story of Noah's Ark,
is Noah the bad guy?
1283
01:35:19,652 --> 01:35:22,352
Is God the bad guy?
1284
01:35:22,652 --> 01:35:25,652
How about the animals marching two by two?
1285
01:35:26,152 --> 01:35:27,652
Of course not.
1286
01:35:28,252 --> 01:35:33,252
Yes, that's it. So let's turn
that frown upside down.
1287
01:35:33,852 --> 01:35:39,571
Eat, drink and party.
1288
01:35:40,452 --> 01:35:43,452
And I'll see you all in the new age.
1289
01:36:07,951 --> 01:36:11,699
Rox, its me. How's the view?
1290
01:36:14,652 --> 01:36:17,052
- Hideous.
- Mine's pretty sweet.
1291
01:36:17,152 --> 01:36:20,007
- They made you one of these suits yet?
- No, not yet.
1292
01:36:20,152 --> 01:36:22,569
That's something to
look forward to then.
1293
01:36:22,594 --> 01:36:25,298
We're coming up on Valentine's base.
Gotta go.
1294
01:36:26,752 --> 01:36:28,059
Good luck.
1295
01:36:35,552 --> 01:36:37,252
Looking good, Eggsy.
1296
01:36:39,179 --> 01:36:41,601
Feeling good, Merlin.
1297
01:36:47,252 --> 01:36:51,291
This is November 2-4-7 Charlie Kilo requesting
permission to land.
1298
01:36:54,452 --> 01:36:55,952
Permission is granted.
1299
01:37:00,903 --> 01:37:03,286
Fuck me.
1300
01:37:29,744 --> 01:37:31,950
Eggsy, We're on.
1301
01:37:46,852 --> 01:37:48,052
Chester King.
1302
01:37:48,752 --> 01:37:50,470
Mr. King, welcome.
1303
01:37:50,657 --> 01:37:55,025
I'm sure you've adhered to Mr Valentine's
strict no weapons policy...
1304
01:37:55,052 --> 01:37:55,696
but if you don't object..
1305
01:37:55,712 --> 01:37:57,278
- Of course.
- Thank you
1306
01:37:57,852 --> 01:37:59,940
Do you have any luggage?
1307
01:38:00,952 --> 01:38:04,852
Congratulations, Mycroft. You just
graduated from my pilot to my valet.
1308
01:38:04,952 --> 01:38:07,577
- Cheeky.
- Understood?
1309
01:38:07,602 --> 01:38:08,602
Good.
1310
01:38:10,052 --> 01:38:11,306
Thank you.
1311
01:38:37,352 --> 01:38:40,488
Eggsy, find a laptop.
Get me online.
1312
01:38:40,513 --> 01:38:42,376
The clock is ticking.
1313
01:38:42,852 --> 01:38:45,552
And remember: Try to blend in.
1314
01:38:45,852 --> 01:38:47,852
Would sir care for a drink?
1315
01:38:48,352 --> 01:38:49,801
Martini. Gin,
1316
01:38:49,826 --> 01:38:52,276
not vodka, obviously.
1317
01:38:52,352 --> 01:38:56,102
Stirred for 10 seconds while glancing
it an unopened bottle of vermouth.
1318
01:38:56,127 --> 01:38:57,376
Thank you.
1319
01:39:00,452 --> 01:39:02,414
Merlin, you clock in this?
1320
01:39:02,439 --> 01:39:04,476
Yes I am. Stay focused.
1321
01:39:05,152 --> 01:39:07,652
Lancelot, you're doing great.
Not much further to go.
1322
01:39:07,952 --> 01:39:09,152
Yes, Merlin.
1323
01:39:10,652 --> 01:39:12,852
Eggsy, get me online. Now.
1324
01:39:14,152 --> 01:39:15,352
Yep. I'm on it.
1325
01:39:16,452 --> 01:39:18,980
Lancelot, you're approaching
your altitude limit.
1326
01:39:19,005 --> 01:39:20,976
These balloons won't
last much longer.
1327
01:39:21,652 --> 01:39:23,352
Start to engage missile.
1328
01:39:38,952 --> 01:39:41,952
The society is dead.
Long live society.
1329
01:39:43,452 --> 01:39:44,652
Amen to that.
1330
01:39:46,452 --> 01:39:48,577
- Morten Lindström.
- Chester King.
1331
01:39:48,602 --> 01:39:49,976
How'd you get online?
1332
01:39:50,052 --> 01:39:53,833
Oh well, it's a closed network, you see.
For authorized connections only.
1333
01:39:57,552 --> 01:39:59,152
I've got a fix on the satellite.
1334
01:39:59,252 --> 01:39:59,938
Do you have the correct time?
1335
01:39:59,938 --> 01:40:01,571
I think I'm still
on my last time zone.
1336
01:40:01,642 --> 01:40:03,450
Oh yeah. Lets see now.
1337
01:40:14,752 --> 01:40:17,328
1338
01:40:17,428 --> 01:40:19,341
Eggsy, I'm in. Get
your arse back to the plane now.
1339
01:40:19,341 --> 01:40:20,133
I'm on my way.
1340
01:40:20,152 --> 01:40:23,652
Lancelot, good luck. Firing in three, two...
1341
01:40:30,922 --> 01:40:32,052
Nice and slow.
1342
01:40:32,153 --> 01:40:33,531
What the fuck are
you doing here?
1343
01:40:33,556 --> 01:40:35,663
Well, my family was naturally invited.
Obviously.
1344
01:40:35,769 --> 01:40:37,769
Now get the fuck up. Slowly.
1345
01:40:39,311 --> 01:40:40,647
Lancelot, hurry up and fire.
1346
01:40:40,672 --> 01:40:42,294
The other balloon is gonna blow.
1347
01:40:42,456 --> 01:40:45,520
Yes, Merlin. I've nearly got it.
Give me a second.
1348
01:40:47,356 --> 01:40:50,335
Valentine, I've caught a fucking spy.
1349
01:40:50,702 --> 01:40:52,358
V-Glass, zoom.
1350
01:40:53,294 --> 01:40:55,294
It's that young valet.
1351
01:40:58,208 --> 01:40:59,673
Son of a bitch.
1352
01:40:59,773 --> 01:41:00,943
Got it.
1353
01:41:11,539 --> 01:41:13,152
Oh shit. Sound the alarm.
1354
01:41:15,217 --> 01:41:16,507
I'm not taking any chances.
1355
01:41:16,678 --> 01:41:19,362
Okay, you send out two minutes warnings. I'm
starting the override.
1356
01:41:22,352 --> 01:41:23,852
Countdown initiated.
1357
01:41:30,452 --> 01:41:31,661
1358
01:41:33,152 --> 01:41:34,652
- You see him?
- Right here.
1359
01:41:43,852 --> 01:41:47,052
Eggsy, take a left. Two guards up ahead.
1360
01:41:59,352 --> 01:42:01,052
Lancelot, release now.
1361
01:42:11,452 --> 01:42:14,452
Eggsy, straight ahead and then right.
There's two more.
1362
01:42:18,352 --> 01:42:21,752
All right, everybody on your feet. Countdown to V-Day.
1363
01:42:22,252 --> 01:42:23,952
Welcome into new age.
1364
01:42:48,352 --> 01:42:51,125
Eggsy, next left. Got a narrow tunnel.
1365
01:42:59,748 --> 01:43:01,065
Here we go.
1366
01:43:01,089 --> 01:43:02,089
Ten...
1367
01:43:02,257 --> 01:43:03,257
Nine...
1368
01:43:04,000 --> 01:43:05,000
Eight...
1369
01:43:06,471 --> 01:43:06,871
Seven...
1370
01:43:07,161 --> 01:43:09,161
Six...
1371
01:43:09,185 --> 01:43:10,285
Five...
1372
01:43:11,209 --> 01:43:13,058
Four...
1373
01:43:13,059 --> 01:43:14,059
Three...
1374
01:43:14,790 --> 01:43:15,790
Two...
1375
01:43:16,458 --> 01:43:17,958
One...
1376
01:43:17,982 --> 01:43:19,982
Biometrics Authorized
1377
01:43:22,000 --> 01:43:23,200
System Failure
1378
01:43:23,252 --> 01:43:25,651
Nice. Well done, both of you.
1379
01:43:25,652 --> 01:43:27,152
It's not working.
1380
01:43:27,252 --> 01:43:29,252
It's supposed to be working. What the fuck?
1381
01:43:35,452 --> 01:43:37,752
Yes, Well done, Rox. Good girl.
1382
01:43:41,152 --> 01:43:43,617
We've lost one of our satellites.
1383
01:43:46,152 --> 01:43:48,152
System Analysis Complete
1384
01:43:53,158 --> 01:43:56,952
Oh no no. There's no way I can hack past that.
1385
01:43:57,155 --> 01:43:58,957
Biometric Security Detected
1386
01:44:02,552 --> 01:44:04,108
What's going on?
1387
01:44:04,133 --> 01:44:06,076
Is there a problem?
1388
01:44:06,852 --> 01:44:09,852
Come on, there's no need for guns.
I'm just a pilot.
1389
01:44:12,920 --> 01:44:14,920
Fuck.. Merlin.
1390
01:44:16,552 --> 01:44:18,052
Get in here.
1391
01:44:22,452 --> 01:44:23,597
Come on.
1392
01:44:27,379 --> 01:44:29,812
- Let's go the fuck out of here.
- We can't.
1393
01:44:29,911 --> 01:44:32,314
I can't get into
Valentine's machine.
1394
01:44:32,339 --> 01:44:34,172
It's got biometric security.
1395
01:44:34,819 --> 01:44:38,019
You're gonna have to get in there and
make sure his hand never touches that desk.
1396
01:44:38,216 --> 01:44:39,737
You taking a fucking piss?
1397
01:44:39,762 --> 01:44:40,873
I'm afraid not.
1398
01:44:44,627 --> 01:44:46,330
Let's me have that then.
1399
01:44:46,906 --> 01:44:48,225
This is mine.
1400
01:44:48,250 --> 01:44:50,480
I'll show you yours.
1401
01:45:07,824 --> 01:45:09,190
Good choice.
1402
01:45:11,873 --> 01:45:13,407
How long to relink
the satellite chain?
1403
01:45:13,432 --> 01:45:14,734
It can take an hour.
Maybe two.
1404
01:45:14,810 --> 01:45:17,241
Bullshit. Just bring these
two closer together.
1405
01:45:17,241 --> 01:45:19,102
But that's not yours.
1406
01:45:24,054 --> 01:45:25,994
V-glass, call E-man.
1407
01:45:26,852 --> 01:45:30,331
E, its V. Listen man, I got a
little hiccup on this end.
1408
01:45:30,356 --> 01:45:31,576
I need a piggyback.
1409
01:45:31,652 --> 01:45:35,514
One of my satellites just went
down but is right next to one of yours.
1410
01:45:36,152 --> 01:45:39,852
You read my mind. How long before you
make that happen?
1411
01:45:42,852 --> 01:45:44,028
Go.
1412
01:45:48,052 --> 01:45:50,052
We should be coming back online.
1413
01:45:52,954 --> 01:45:54,054
10%
1414
01:45:58,752 --> 01:46:00,983
Valentine using someone else's satellite.
1415
01:46:01,008 --> 01:46:02,118
He's gonna reconnect the chain.
1416
01:46:02,143 --> 01:46:03,984
Its gonna take him no time at all.
1417
01:46:04,052 --> 01:46:05,552
Its at 20%.
1418
01:46:23,652 --> 01:46:26,852
Eggsy, Valentine's got a present for you.
Get a move on.
1419
01:47:00,552 --> 01:47:03,752
- Is that Kingsman kid dead yet?
- Not yet. But he will be soon.
1420
01:47:03,852 --> 01:47:05,097
Good.
1421
01:47:18,492 --> 01:47:20,218
Merlin, I'm fucked.
1422
01:47:32,657 --> 01:47:33,822
As am I.
1423
01:47:33,946 --> 01:47:36,591
They're coming at me from both sides.
I'm out of options.
1424
01:47:36,752 --> 01:47:39,252
Rox, I need a favor.
1425
01:47:39,626 --> 01:47:43,096
Call my mum and tell her to
lock herself away from Dean
1426
01:47:43,121 --> 01:47:44,277
and the baby.
1427
01:47:45,752 --> 01:47:47,252
And tell her I love her.
1428
01:48:01,252 --> 01:48:04,752
Merlin, you remember those implants you
said were of no use to us?
1429
01:48:06,000 --> 01:48:07,941
Any chance you could turn them on?
1430
01:48:10,952 --> 01:48:14,452
My turn to play, Valentine.
1431
01:48:23,239 --> 01:48:25,352
Oh no. What the fuck is he...
1432
01:48:25,376 --> 01:48:27,376
I cant stop this.
1433
01:48:38,169 --> 01:48:40,169
ACTIVATE SECURITY IMPLANTS?
1434
01:48:40,292 --> 01:48:41,833
Yes, please.
1435
01:48:43,552 --> 01:48:45,752
SECURITY IMPLANTS ACTIVATED
1436
01:48:45,776 --> 01:48:47,776
Nooo....
1437
01:49:45,244 --> 01:49:47,131
That was fucking spectacular.
1438
01:49:47,364 --> 01:49:49,702
Merlin, you're a fucking genius.
1439
01:49:50,166 --> 01:49:53,496
What the fuck is happening out there?
1440
01:49:57,763 --> 01:49:59,792
Aren't you that princess
who went missing?
1441
01:49:59,817 --> 01:50:00,854
Can you get me out?
1442
01:50:01,052 --> 01:50:02,802
Well if I do, will
you give me a kiss?
1443
01:50:02,827 --> 01:50:04,576
I've always wanted
to kiss a princess.
1444
01:50:04,653 --> 01:50:07,293
If you get me out right now,
I will give you more than just a kiss.
1445
01:50:08,844 --> 01:50:10,151
You motherfucker.
1446
01:50:10,252 --> 01:50:12,045
Did you really I
was stupid enough
1447
01:50:12,070 --> 01:50:14,476
to implant one of those
things in my own head?
1448
01:50:14,752 --> 01:50:16,452
What are you? Fucking crazy?
1449
01:50:17,452 --> 01:50:19,952
All those innocent people killed and for what?
1450
01:50:20,652 --> 01:50:23,352
You didn't stop shit.
1451
01:50:25,052 --> 01:50:26,855
Fine, I have locked the door.
What do you want me to do now?
1452
01:50:26,863 --> 01:50:30,276
As I said, put your daughter in the
bathroom and throw away the key.
1453
01:50:30,452 --> 01:50:32,602
It's still happening.
1454
01:50:33,206 --> 01:50:35,629
- You fucking insane?
- Just do it.
1455
01:51:02,752 --> 01:51:04,594
Eggsy, the signal's started.
1456
01:51:04,619 --> 01:51:07,776
Get Valentine's hand off
that bloody desk now.
1457
01:51:07,952 --> 01:51:10,452
Sorry, love. Gotta save the world.
1458
01:51:10,552 --> 01:51:14,038
If you save the world,
would you do me in the asshole?
1459
01:51:15,450 --> 01:51:17,087
I will be right back.
1460
01:51:18,552 --> 01:51:19,674
Good luck.
1461
01:51:26,252 --> 01:51:27,570
London.
1462
01:51:55,701 --> 01:51:56,844
Rio.
1463
01:52:12,622 --> 01:52:13,752
Get down.
1464
01:52:15,452 --> 01:52:16,652
You did it.
1465
01:52:25,852 --> 01:52:27,889
This glass is not gonna hold long.
1466
01:52:29,552 --> 01:52:31,176
You stay here.
1467
01:52:33,252 --> 01:52:36,241
- Merlin, quickly how do I get up there?
- Keep shooting. I'm find a route.
1468
01:52:36,290 --> 01:52:38,190
Understood.
1469
01:53:13,352 --> 01:53:16,352
We are back up.
1470
01:53:23,652 --> 01:53:25,152
This is great.
1471
01:53:33,405 --> 01:53:35,525
Eggsy, fucking get on with it.
1472
01:53:36,133 --> 01:53:37,633
Kick his ass, darling.
1473
01:53:43,852 --> 01:53:46,552
Seoul, Caracas, Mumbai.
1474
01:53:55,081 --> 01:53:57,081
Kill that motherfucking ...
1475
01:54:14,181 --> 01:54:16,728
Eggsy, the world is going to shit.
1476
01:54:26,352 --> 01:54:28,452
- Is he dead yet?
- Not yet.
1477
01:54:28,552 --> 01:54:31,252
Stop playing with your foot. Kill him.
1478
01:55:49,952 --> 01:55:51,152
Gazelle.
1479
01:55:51,176 --> 01:55:53,176
Gazelle!
1480
01:56:04,152 --> 01:56:06,152
Come on.
1481
01:56:08,660 --> 01:56:09,856
Kill him.
1482
01:56:52,852 --> 01:56:54,352
Well done son.
1483
01:56:55,640 --> 01:56:56,642
Yes!
1484
01:56:56,880 --> 01:56:57,580
Yes! Eggsy
1485
01:56:57,852 --> 01:56:59,460
Well done, Eggsy.
1486
01:56:59,485 --> 01:57:01,376
And you, Lancelot.
1487
01:57:03,752 --> 01:57:07,230
I am sorry. Mommy
would never hurt you.
1488
01:57:07,255 --> 01:57:09,776
Mommy would never hurt you.
I am so sorry.
1489
01:57:12,627 --> 01:57:13,752
You okay?
1490
01:57:17,452 --> 01:57:19,452
Harry would be proud of you, Eggsy.
1491
01:57:20,652 --> 01:57:21,852
He was right.
1492
01:57:37,451 --> 01:57:39,246
'Sup man?
1493
01:57:39,347 --> 01:57:43,052
Is this the part where you say some
really bad pun?
1494
01:57:43,852 --> 01:57:45,754
Its like you said to Harry:
1495
01:57:49,015 --> 01:57:51,215
This ain't that kind of movie, bro.
1496
01:57:52,852 --> 01:57:54,052
Perfect.
1497
01:58:14,852 --> 01:58:15,799
Eggsy, where you going?
1498
01:58:15,824 --> 01:58:18,376
There's no need for champagne
We have got lots on the plane.
1499
01:58:25,552 --> 01:58:27,541
Did you save the world?
1500
01:58:27,566 --> 01:58:28,776
Yes I did.
1501
01:58:31,547 --> 01:58:33,678
So, You gonna come in?
1502
01:58:33,703 --> 01:58:35,123
Yes, I am.
1503
01:58:40,238 --> 01:58:42,532
Merlin, this cell's locked.
How do I get in?
1504
01:58:44,852 --> 01:58:46,446
26-25.
1505
01:58:50,741 --> 01:58:53,502
Merlin, you're the governor.
1506
01:58:55,374 --> 01:58:57,757
You owe me, Eggsy.
1507
01:59:03,769 --> 01:59:05,769
Eggsy
1508
01:59:10,376 --> 01:59:12,282
Oh my word.
1509
01:59:59,370 --> 02:00:02,265
Michelle, turn that shit off, its
turning me nutty.
1510
02:00:03,103 --> 02:00:04,948
I rather like that song.
1511
02:00:05,091 --> 02:00:07,012
Leave it on eh, Mom.
1512
02:00:10,395 --> 02:00:12,417
Mugsy's back.
1513
02:00:12,724 --> 02:00:14,964
You finally come to have that
word with me, have you son?
1514
02:00:15,379 --> 02:00:17,020
Or are you going to run
away again and pretend
1515
02:00:17,045 --> 02:00:18,615
you're getting another
coat dress like that?
1516
02:00:18,691 --> 02:00:20,691
You mean this?
1517
02:00:21,633 --> 02:00:23,284
No.
1518
02:00:23,631 --> 02:00:26,977
I know this bloke who's just taken
over a tailor shop up on Seville Road.
1519
02:00:27,338 --> 02:00:29,338
He's got me a job, Mom.
1520
02:00:30,112 --> 02:00:32,112
Comes with a lot of perks.
1521
02:00:32,752 --> 02:00:34,752
Including a house.
1522
02:00:35,558 --> 02:00:37,558
Come and live with me there, Mum.
1523
02:00:38,189 --> 02:00:40,189
- Come on.
- Sit down, you.
1524
02:00:41,114 --> 02:00:44,365
Only place she'll be visiting is
you in fucking hospital, do you hear?
1525
02:00:44,465 --> 02:00:47,928
Just leave him alone.
Eggsy, go please. Just go away.
1526
02:00:49,089 --> 02:00:50,585
All right
1527
02:00:50,788 --> 02:00:52,410
Yes, just do as mommy says.
1528
02:00:52,511 --> 02:00:54,655
Why don't you ask that tailor
friend of yours to knock up
1529
02:00:54,680 --> 02:00:56,706
a nice chicken costume,
it would suit you ya mug.
1530
02:00:59,641 --> 02:01:02,107
As a good friend once said:
1531
02:01:03,364 --> 02:01:04,703
Manners...
1532
02:01:06,207 --> 02:01:07,488
maketh...
1533
02:01:10,248 --> 02:01:11,929
man.
1534
02:01:12,271 --> 02:01:14,156
- Dean?
- Shut the fuck up.
1535
02:01:14,342 --> 02:01:16,695
Eggsy, I'm gonna shove your manners
up your fucking...
1536
02:01:21,871 --> 02:01:23,766
So...
1537
02:01:23,791 --> 02:01:28,155
Are we going to stand around here all day,
or are we going to fight?
1538
02:01:30,841 --> 02:01:51,079
Edited by TehBotolSosro.
Original sub by Helper101