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Okay, look, I can't believe that I'm really here...
and that I will be able to see them in the flesh,
because, like, Dujour is like most of my favorite bands of all time!
Dujour!
I just want to touch them... I don't care where I don't care where.
I have all their trading cards and all their CDs,
and all my equipment is from their clothing line, Dujour Couture.
I mean, straight love '- me, just, you know, like a brother.
Oh, God! They are here!
We are here exclusively on asphalt as the Dujour head band of their world tour.
A year ago, have you ever imagined number one song, the number one requested video?
We're number one with bullets, babies, comin 'for you!
Marco, there is a woman there - "Marry, Marco -" in a wedding dress.
-Keep buyin 'notes, baby! -Please send it back to everyone in the studio?
What's the matter, John?
- Marco!
All right, boy. We will land at Riverdale in half an hour.
Then to Rise Riverdale and show Shine.
Afternoon at the store gig at 8:00. Question?
Yeah, Wyatt, why is my limited edition Coke able to have my beard with a...
when everyone knows I'm shaving into a soul patch for the 'Don't Tell Your Papa' video?
This is Wack wiggity-, Wyatt. You should be on top of this.
No, what wiggity-Wack is Your damn monkey. Here we go with the monkey again. DJ. DJ with monkey.
Yes, here we go again. First pooed incense in it.
Then decide to sew on two small balls . And then pooed on my picture of Swami Mukananda. Did you explain this means people are Dujour cleanliness?
Maybe if you show Dr. Zaius respect right, Dr. Zaius will stop showing you 'feces!
Gentlemen... -I'm going to kill you!
OK! Now, this is enough. I will rip from your heart!
Eye contact, contact hand. Eye, hands.
We will talk to Coke about cans...
and try and clean after the doctor, okay?
Okay?
- Yo, man, I'm sorry. My bad. - All good.
Wyatt? Yes?
Can you maybe talk to Marco about him always doing my face?
Do you remember in the video What set up - face?
Since then, every time you see Marco, he does - face, and that is mine.
You saw him at Carson TRL. "Hi,"
Look at him at our Kid's Choice Awards. "Here. Thank you."
Then here is the cover of Seventeen magazine.
"Hi, little girl? Beauty. Secret"
This is my face. This is my face.
Travis, me, uh - news of your face,
Because - God forbid me either - your face does, this causes' - like a good face.
Already! - Boys, boys, boys.
- Wait! - Dujour means friendship.
Thank you, Les. Now listen to me.
Let's take a moment.
When we land, I will call the choreographer, and he will give me a new face.
- You're too bad Mama can't give a good face. - Take what is now back soon!
-I'm sorry, Travis. Thank you.
You can have a new face.
- Dujour means family. - Dujour means teamwork.
Teamwork.
- So, how are we? Are we good? - Yes.
- Are we happy? Happy?
-Are we taking drugs? Speaking
- Evil. -Yo, Wyatt, Wyatt, there's one more thing.
Yes
Well, we worked on a number of remixes from the last single, right?
We hear like the background song is really weird.
We want to know if you know what all that is.
Gee. You know, I don't know what that is.
Where did it come from?
-I mean, Wyatt, we just want answers. - The answer, I will give.
I'll be back soon.
Take Chevy for the embankment.
Wow! Wow!
Hey, that guy in the parachute looks like Wyatt.
Oh yeah? Does he look like this? Or like?
Already! - Break it up!
- Dujour means a seat belt!
Dujour means the position crashes!
Looks like we need to find a new band.
Thank you.
- Thank you, guys. - Real nice.
Thanks for comin 'out.
You're a big person.
Okay, kids. We need to walk now...
and your shoes.
-So how do we do it? -Twenty dollars... rent shoes minus five dollars.
Fifteen dollars. Each.
Five dollars.
All things considered, I will say this is our best show yet.
We only need to build following.
Look, cheap has a rock show, and nobody comes.
Are you all coordinates before you leave home,
or do you use the same thing as an accident?
At least we don't wear stupid rabbit ears.
They are not bunny. They are leopards.
And they are not stupid. They are special.
- We are special. - Yeah, specifically... ed.
Enjoy the gutter, Josie. You will play there forever.
Hey. Hey, come on.
Who is a rock star?
Who is a rock star? I.
That's right. There you go.
Lookin 'good, McCoy!
Alan M, anyone goin 'on?
Uh, uh, the truck died.
Josie
# Am I busting carburetor #
# Overload alternator #
Directly at any time.
- # Gas pedal misused # Good.
You can't drive up when it's hot outside. I said.
You don't deserve this truck either. You really take it for granted.
# I want the truck to be given #
# He said I took my truck for granted #
Um, Jose?
Is, uh -
Have you ever wanted to tell someone something, but -
but you are not sure if you have to, you know?
yeah
Because you don't know what their reaction might be or if it's the right thing?
You have to tell them. You must always tell them.
Because there are people at work,
and he just smells, you know?
A man? Yeah.
-Bau guys. -Oh, God, Josie, no, it doesn't just smell.
I'm talking, like, hot, wet garbage on a sunny day.
I think there is a problem. It's like a stadium bathroom or something.
Nobody seems to want to say anything.
I know you will say something though, right?
Yeah. See, that's what I like about you.
- We can only talk about things. That's what I'm here for, son.
- That's cool. - Ah!
Mmm! Good ramen.
I don't think people know how far one pack can go.
horn, horn. Who brought donuts?
I hope you don't think that this will make you disappear for our performance.
Of course we don't lose much.
Nice management skills, brother. Build yourself a good fat group girl.
Hello, Alexandra. Do you lose weight?
Bite me, Bambi! Okay, Alexandra, why don't you wait in the car?
-Create me, nose job. -Implan.
-Penis - Ouch! Oh, sorry.
That's the second time today, right?
Ouch! Ouch. So, ladies, how do we arrange to leave?
Hey, honey, I run a management company here. No I'm in all places at once.
Isn't that cool though if you can?
I can be here and there,
and I can be in the living room...
and in the family room and here!
Alexander, you don't have other clients. Where else do you need it?
On the streets, spreading the gospel of the cat.
I'm out there working my butt off for you guys.
I handed out leaflets. I work mass.
Queue for Dujour tickets.
This is for business. I - this, uh -
Check the competition do. I don't like Dujour, like, it's Dujour.
And I could go back in this room, and I could go in the closet!
Hello? Eh. Do you want a demo recording from a cat?
- Your phone doesn't even ring. - It's vibrating.
- Um, so - so, yeah. I have to go now. - And then -
Do you want it now? Okay yeah. So, I will see you later.
Alright, I'm on it. You know he is lying.
You know your flying is open.
You know, you... suck!
That's perfect. Even our manager wants to see another band.
You guys, come here fast.
Hi. I'm Serena Altschul with MTV News.
We just received a confirmed report...
that Dujour members pop sensations disappeared on their private jets today,
missing from radar 40 miles east of Riverdale city.
The authorities are still trying to determine the existence of the plane...
and if there are survivors.
Dujour's label, MegaRecords, is yet to release a statement,
but they have released a limited edition set up warning box,
complete with history of the Dujour CD ROM in the store tomorrow.
They are poor boys. We will keep you posted for any further developments...
in what seems to be another rock-and-roll tragedy.
But they didn't say they were dead. They said they were missing.
I think we collect money for a search party, and we have cake sales!
Yes!
Humans, who are so sad.
Everything can be more in an instant.
You know, but at least they have a recording contract.
We can have a recording contract.
It's just that we can't sit here waiting for that to happen.
We have to make it happen.
And do you know what? Life is short.
And we - we are musicians, and that means...
that we have to play music out there.
We play, and we rock, but show nobody.
-No one cares. -I care. I do. And do you know what?
When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade, and when it will be difficult -
What's hard to make lemonade!
Really...
Good. We are all on the same page.
Pack your bass. This way.
-I live for pink shoes. -Yeah, they're much cooler than our red shoes.
You guys, new red pink.
Wyatt Frame. I'm with a label.
I'm in town scouting new talent, and I wonder if anyone hears it worthy.
I see cards, men, but I miss other things.
Why don't you restart, while I change songs?
No, wait! Play this. This is a new single from Dujour...
recorded only a few days ago before... disappearance.
I really want to test the reaction.
Good!
Check this, you have! I, the world premiere of the last single ever...
from the end, great Dujour is only for all of you in the shop.
Check this.
This is the best!
I like this song! That's the best ever.
If I don't buy it, everyone will hate me. Totally!
And, I also want orange shoes. Yeah!
Orange shoes are much cooler than stupid pink shoes.
You guys, orange is a new pink!
I'm sick of Reebok sweating. I need to sweat Puma.
And I have to buy six-pack Zima.
Dude, you don't drink. I think I have to start.
Yes, I think they responded that it was actually very good.
I think that the song sucks.
I plug my ears when garbage like that comes on.
Really? Everyone seems like that.
That's because they are mindless drones who will swallow whatever you say they are cold.
Oh, I see. Wow! You are real free thinker right?
I want to talk to you again.
People in the recording industry, like me,
always want to hear the opinions of people like you...
to find out what we did wrong.
Yes, right. How much time do you have?
As much as you want. After you.
It smells like a teenager's spirit.
Now, this must be my lucky day.
A real non-conformist. I'm so interested in hearing what else you have to say.
Well, first of all, I don't understand -
Wow, that's interesting.
- Frame. - I am waiting.
I'm going to that, Fiona... Will you not believe this place is a desert of culture.
Stop making excuses and get your donkey back here with the band.
Tomorrow. I'll have a new band for you first thing in the morning. I swear!
Then you will still have a job - maybe.
Just put this thing? Yeah.
Okay, girl, here it is... Unplugged cats Let's hear it.
One, two. One two Three!
Wait, wait, wait. Hey. What do you think you are doing?
You can't play here. I have something to sell. They are new. They are oranges.
- Then? - So, see you. You are right -
Who will come to my shop with you outside?
I last checked, this is a free country.
What I checked, I called the last one from the police.
"Get your ass back here with the band."
I want to see him move the donkey once, only once.
Like he really will call the police.
Run away!
This is impossible.
Where can I find -
Hello, Frame woman. Wyatt, MegaRecords.
Girls, I can't say how happy I am to be sitting...
on this table with a Pussy Hat.
Cats.
Yes, of course. Of course, that will explain why you don't wear anything.
Hat.
Okay, I speak on behalf of everyone on the label...
when I said that we would be happy for you to log in with... MegaRecords.
Whoa, wait, wait. Don't sign anything. Don't sign anything.
- Who is this? - Alexander Cabot Ill I'm a cat 'manager.
Really? In this case, you will be entitled to 15% of everything they make.
-I'm his sister, Alexandra accent. Love. Thank you.
I'm used to summer in continental kisses. A Fancy?
Fancy mint candy?
Wait a minute? You want our sign You have never heard us play.
Oh! Oh oh. Forgive me. Forgive me.
I think you are a rock band who wants to sign with a major label. I am bad.
- No, no, no! Don't!
No No. The number - I don't know it can happen this fast.
Well, that's the music biz for you. If you wait to slow down, it might just go away.
See what happened to the Beastie Boys.
- But they are big stars. - I know.
Excuse me. I have to -
- Bathroom? - Yeah, me too.
I leave before we leave you. Nice.
You should always try to go to the bathroom before you leave home,
even if you don't need to -
Okay, this is crazy.
Beeps. Gotta gloss. This will not hide the mustache.
horn, horn. Alexander!
I have to be here. This is the room lady.
Nothing I haven't seen before. Does anyone have a change for tampons?
I will be outside.
Does anyone else think this is a little off?
Like what? Like Wyatt's guy, one of them.
Like how he ordered triple cappuccino and spooned out of all the foam.
Why not just get espresso?
Plus how does he keep folding napkins like he's afraid he doesn't have real friends?
Only people want to use because he's a big music person.
Yeah. But I talked further about the whole record contract.
-This is super sudden. ID-1 formed
But you said that. You said we had to go there and make things happen, and we did.
I know. I just thought maybe we should think about this for a moment.
Wow, Josie, how interesting you are.
You will be able to go and make notes, and poor Alan M Wilil must stay behind...
at Riverdale alone with me.
I can't believe they let you take me to town with you.
Shh. What?
I have to tell them that you are my guitar technology, so -
Guitar tech. Right.
Do you know what? I still don't understand why you are here.
- I'm here because I'm in a comic book. - What?
None.
Whoa!
What's wrong, big butt?
Shut up...
Hey, you guys. Do you know how people always say that this is life?
I think this is when they say it.
- Private aircraft. Agreements.
Glass coasters.
Lots of cash.
Scratch it. We are still poor.
-Sorry? Wait a minute. - # I want to know why you - #
Yes
At least I don't think I need this anymore.
Riverdale passed Muni bus.
Guys, do you know what? We have the only bus passed with three people in the picture.
It's not my fault you two jumped in my hand.
Okay, no, you two jumped in my hand.
We must continue this.
Reminds us where we came from.
Hey, listen, let's promise everything else...
here and now, okay?
No matter what happens - If we become big stars...
end or if we go through to return to Riverdale,
we will always be friends of the first and second bands.
- First friend. -First friend.
-I swear on the bus I passed? -I swear on the bus I graduated.
Don't worry, Lex. We won't have problems with girls.
"Oh, no.
Gosh. This is very big.
Oh, this is just the beginning.
Are you sure you have to put the one up?
I mean, we haven't even recorded anything yet.
What if you don't like it?
What if no one likes it?
Don't worry. If you screw, we will only make other people there.
-Hey, Wyatt? Hmm?
They have our name wrong. Hmm?
We're not Josie and cats.
We are just cats. Oh, no, singer Josie.
People need someone ahead to identify with me. Trust.
Our study shows that bands have the words "and" in the title...
sells twice as many records as people who don't.
What about the Beatles or the Rolling Stones?
Yes, if you want to investigate, of course, obviously.
Yes, yes, but, come on.
Are you more interested in a band called just a cat,
or are you more likely to buy a CD or read comics...
or watching cartoons or going and seeing a movie about a trio of luscious women...
called Josie and cat?
Hmm? It doesn't have a good ring for that.
Oh, yes.
Hey!
Oh, so sorry, Valerie has. I don't know you're not here.
Ha, ha. Come on
More coasters.
What am I saying, Fiona? That can't be better.
Imagine Christina Aguliera three times except one of them is extraordinary...
or another KLT with two white chickens...
or, um, Hole!
Wyatt, I got it without a stupid analogy.
Put them in the studio tomorrow. We will talk later.
The FBI is here with some foreigners. I have to give them a tour.
- You will not be disappointed. - I'd better not.
We can't get Dujour disaster anymore.
Welcome.
I'm sure you're wondering why Agent Kelly and the United States government...
will be very interested in what appears to be a record company.
Well, I will show you why.
This... is what our operation really is.
Blue is a new orange.
This is where it starts - with mode, mode,
product placement.
From the command center, we control the most influential population demographics.
We decided everything - from what clothes in style to slang in fashion.
Feather tank tops, matching pants. A kind of Chicken Run Buffy meets.
Fur is new rhinestones.
A new word for cool will be "vest", "like,
"Dude, it's a vest" That's. It's "Dirty. This is the center of all trends.
We turn your world into one of the commercial TV giants.
But how, you might ask, can Of course these children are very effective?
Of course these kids have brains like Play-Doh, just waiting for black to be given shape,
but something else must happen, right?
Chinese know what I'm talking about .
To answer some of your questions,
we have produced an educational short film.
Lights!
Hello. I'm Eugene Levy,
and, yes, I'm an actor.
And, I said cappuccino.
I'm here to talk to you about something very important.
No, this is not about me or my career.
I'm here to talk about rock music subliminal messages and roll...
or because this is only known in some cultures - rock music.
For years the government has been forcing teenagers wisely...
to buy products they usually don't just want to get their money.
Fact: Children don't have to pay bills.
Fact: They don't pay taxes,
but they are baby-sitting and hold-minimum wage jobs...
they can get lumps as thick as cash, well, my body works.
But these kids aren't stupid at the moment.
They won't buy anything.
That's why the government has planted subliminal small advertising advice...
in rock music today.
The result? We can now get children to buy anything.
We can have them pursue new trends every week,
and that is good for the economy.
What is good for the economy that is good for the country.
So God bless the United States,
the most ass-kickin 'country in the world.
How do you control the rock band?
What if they find out about hidden messages in their music?
Ever wondered why so many rock stars die in airplane accidents?
Drug overdose!
We have been doing this for a long time.
If they start to be too curious, our choices are limited.
Bankruptcy, shocking scandal, religious conversion.
We have created a very-value TV show...
only to explain what happened to these people.
Wow.
Soft walls.
We bring some equipment in.
I consider it to your liking.
They are brand new.
I'm like this. It's got shiny buttons.
No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no. That we don't touch.
This is only the most expensive piece of equipment in the studio.
The Megasound 8000.
Even though the name of the voice isn't fun, it's actually just a high-tech processor.
How do you work? Why do you have to know that?
What is this, a big secret or something?
A big secret. Wyatt has a secret.
This is no secret. Stop it I will tell you. I will show you.
Playing a little something for me, right?
Perfect! Now, this will only take a few moments.
And now I will play again with Megasound.
Is that us?
That sounds like that -
- I want a Big Mac. - What?
Mel, you're vegetarian.
I know, but suddenly I want one. Maybe on the way back to the hotel?
Okay, as long as we can stop by too Foot Locker.
I really want a pair of old-school Tretorns.
Tretorns vest 'is the new Adidas.
Ladies, now I have to drop again at Riverdale Mall, or are you ready to set a record?
Come on!
One, two. One two Three.
This is the best CD ever!
Yeah, and I want some Gatorade. Gatorade is the new Snapple!
- This must be a typo.
- Yea! Wait
Do others think it's a bit strange that all this happens in a week?
No!
Who are you?
We know them!
Eww! We!
Oh, God! We love you. We are like your biggest fans!
- No, you don't. You hate us. Are you crazy?
Josie and cats are our favorite new bands of all time!
Josie and the cat are new Dujour!
Want to see a Pussycat tattoo? Look at that!
That's too weird.
Strange? What's the use of being famous...
if the person you hate in middle school doesn't want to lick your ass?
You are lucky.
Most people have to wait until ten years for their reunion for things like revenge.
You just have to get used to people throwing yourself at you.
And, talking about throwing,
Fiona, head of MegaRecords, is having a big party tonight to honor you,
celebration of all things Josie.
- Um, Wyatt? Hmm?
- Can I not get it? - Oh, the weird one.
Why didn't you come too? There is always room for one more.
How about us? No
Wow. A party. That's, um -
That's, uh - It's kind of cold.
But is it "cool type" as playing the stadium concert itself?
Oops! I promise Fiona he can tell you. Shit.
We play stadium concerts? This weekend.
Don't we maybe play some small clubs first?
Maybe doing some shows in Europe below. A Build.
You have followed. Really, "J."
I won't send you out there if I don't think you can give.
That will only make me look bad. But this is the whole agreement:
-View web cast pay simultaneous, live streaming video,
millions of small people pay good money just to watch you.
Well, I'm sure your bandmates are happy.
Right, Melly-Mel. Our first? Concert ever Thank you, Wyatt.
Don't thank me. Thank Fiona.
This is a washing machine idea. This is part of the plan for you from the start.
Operation Big Concert,
where we finally take something to the next level.
When Josie and the cat played their stadium concerts, all the children were in the audience,
and those who watch at home, WilI must buy this.
This is the debut of the DX 3-surround sound,
a new technology that makes music feel like it's happening around you,
Like 3-D.
Gentlemen, demonstration.
This is what children think they hear on the headset people.
This is what they really heard.
Corresponding Free will be too much exaggerated. Jump on.
That's sound. I know that sound. It's, um -
- It's Mr. Moviefone. Yes
He doesn't realize we are all tracks.
There is no place like Area 51.
Excellent work, Fiona. These children will never know what happened to them.
- And it won't be you. - Forgive me. What is that?
- Huh? What? - You only say something.
No, I don't. Yes, right.
I said, "These children will never know what happened to them," and then you say, "And you won't."
me? - We all hear you.
Oh - Well -
What I mean is,
"And you won't."
It means teenagers.
I just emphasized my point.
Oh. Oh, okay. Great. thanks.
That's near me. I'm sorry?
I will say, "That's... close...
" To be really good when a.......
between us. "
Don't you think? Yeah, well, I guess.
I have to go back to the Pentagon, so -
Toni Tennille and l - we wrote all the songs together.
The captain only plays the piano.
That's my idea to have him wear that hat.
I said, "How will you be captain if you don't wear a hat?"
We did some beautiful music together though.
Great song - What I'm responsible for most is...
"Love Will Keep With Us."
Well, guess what. Apparently not.
Guess after a while, you know, they don't want to share the spotlight again.
Sometimes things happen.
I still remember, though, the Captain always said,
"The band's first first friend..."
I wish I had got the writin in '.
"Oh, no.
That's better.
Oh, God, I'm very sorry.
I really, really forgot.
We have to go to this party to record with the label head.
Why? - There is no. It just, uh -
You look so, uh -
You can't make me happy... They send this dress as long as I don't choose it.
But I cut on the front, and I made a bracelet.
It looks stupid, right?
No, no, no. Not me -
I just - I've never seen you - Wow!
You finished the sentence.
Is that good or wow wow bad?
Oh, no, no. This, uh - It's a good wow.
It's a - it's a - it's a really good wow.
Thank you.
-Actually, do you mind? There are - What thoughts?
There are chain things that I don't really know.
Oh, right. Right, um - Okay.
Um...
That's, um - it's here.
A little complicated.
Josie, are you ready? Open door. I hope I don't disturb anything.
- Hey, Alec N, how does that depend? - Actually, Alan M.
Yes, what's wrong with the start? That doesn't work for Sheila E. and it doesn't work for you.
Josie, we don't want the hottest and most exclusive late party of the year.
There is a free cable.
Eh, Josie?
Um, I'm wondering, dd-do you want to do something tomorrow?
Yeah. When?
-2: 00? -Nothing can do. Record E.
- Oh. 1:30 3:00 - MTV. MSNBC.
- 4:00. - 4:15.
- Sales for young men with a future.
Come on, Josie. There is a waiting limo ,. Goodnight Adam 12.
- Trot on. - Actually, Alan M.
Look at them looking at us. Nobody thinks I should be here.
That's really what they think.
Look at them looking at Josie.
Nobody thinks I have to be here. That's what they think at all.
Ladies and gentlemen, head of MegaRecords...
and host of your party, Fiona.
Isn't he extraordinary?
I'm Fiona. Welcome to your party!
It's enough to watch. Let's go be kids!
This is my girly room. No boys are allowed.
Come on, kids. Sit down We will gossip.
Oh!
Isn't he just cutest?
She's pretty cute.
Pringles!
Pringles! Josie!
Come on!
Oh, I'm starving!
I'm like a pig.
N-No. No, you don't.
So, Josie, what is your weight? Excuse me?
Your weight! 118.
Ha! 115. I am three pounds lighter than you.
But don't worry about that. I think you look great.
Tho is beautiful and popular.
What did you say?
None. I have a new thong that is quite popular.
What is "thong"?
The new thong. New Thingle.
I'm Thor. I have thomething stuck in my teeth.
Get it.
So, who wants to establish France?
Okay, so who else thinks that Fiona is weird?
Oh, God. I'm really glad you said something, because as soon as you say its name,
I have the most terrible sensation,
Like this - cold ice cold creeps up my back.
Oh, honey, it's because you're sitting at O.
Oh.
No, I still have shivering, you guys.
Not O. It's it's.
I don't know. What do you think, Val?
Stuff It's definitely been... different since we left Riverdale.
And, if you ask me, some things that feel like they have changed completely.
- Wyatt. Hmm?
I'm not like two cats. They ask questions, and it's dangerous.
We can't take more risks.
I'll get rid of them, have a new band by morning.
Ooh! Think, Wyatt.
We already sold half a million from Josie's ears for a big concert.
Right. Yes. So we. So what do you mean?
Keep Josie, and place two nosy little sleeping cats.
Mmmm.
I don't think Josie will play without her friends.
Oh? I think we can persuade him. Mmm?
Next, behind Music,
Josie suffered a tragic loss.
The city aquarium has more than 244 varieties of marine life.
Josie, did I say, I have a concert tonight?
-you doing? That is good! -Yeah, well,
it's just this bar, but the manager - I play him my demo,
and he said I could, like, almost half an hour full night.
Do you think you might want to come, or -
Yes, everyone. "Because I know you are busy and. Oh, God. Is that Josie? Where? Josie!
Thank you.
Yeah, no problem.
How will I do this? Ap -What?
I'm a girl from Riverdale, you know? I -
I'm not a rock star. Jose, you've dreamed about your whole life. = What?
I'm afraid.
Don't. You have to believe in yourself.
What if I can't?
Then ..
then I guess I just have to trust you for you.
Oh, wow.
Oh, wow!
So, what do you think we should open with concerts -
'Spin Around', or maybe 'Come On'?
Uh, I don't know.
We can try Roli Active, Rolly wheels,
but, honestly, I think the lyrics still need to work.
What do you think?
It's up to you. I mean, you boss.
No, I don't. What's Val with you?
Hello, girl! And how beautiful and talented in rock are most women - roll and?
Eh? Don't you mean "woman"?
Valerie, my dear, you must learn to receive praise.
I mean, what will you do tonight when you go on TRL...
Carson Daly and tells you how much he loves your music?
Don't mean, what will Josie do?
No, because he won't be there. We only book you and Melody.
It's time for the world to get to know other cats.
Will we be at TRL? Um, hmm.
Can I touch Carson like? Anywhere you are.
The record is in two hours, except, of course, you have a problem with this.
Do you have a problem with this?
No! I think you will have the right time. I like to show that.
And - and you don't mind Mel and I leaving without you?
Why? I don't care about that.
Jose -
Oh, I'm very sorry!
I don't know what I'm thinking. Okay.
Come on, kids. There are stylists and designers waiting in your room.
And you have homework tonight. This is a remix of the next single.
- I will be very curious to hear your thoughts. - Can it wait until tomorrow?
It's just that Alan M is playing his first show tonight, and I want to get there early.
Oh. Oh, I'm very sorry, Josie forgot. I'm telling you.
Alan M called my office. They canceled the show.
Yes, they have. - yes.
Why doesn't he call me here?
Um, I'm sure of him. In fact,
I'm sure if you go to the front desk, there will be a message waiting for you.
Sorry.
Yes, there is a message waiting for you... now.
I think I should call him.
Um... he also said to say that he would not be available for several hours,
and he will call you when he gets.
- Everything in the message? - Eh, yes. Excuse me.
Yes, that's all in the message. There are more?
Who do you keep calling?
I'm running a label here, Josephine.
I have other artists who need me, other artists who need time,
Other artists are not so difficult about putting in a little extra work.
Your level of non-commitment makes me doubt the commitment of your commitment.
So, you want to be a rock superstar, eh -
Live big, big house, five cars?
Now, you have to do time.
If not, other people will,
and you will be left to explain everything to Mel and Val.
I am committed.
I
Yes, I hope so, honey.
I hope so.
- Val, we are on TRL! - Hey, look see!
This is fake.
Wow. this thing looks so different on TV.
All these fake items? Where is everybody where is Carson?
Yo, kittycats! How are you ladies' me? I'm Carson Daly. Welcome.
You're not Carson Daly.
What are you talking about? Of course I'm Carson Daly. Check the nails.
You have to call me. I have a plan.
Alright. Is everyone ready to start the event?
- Oh, God, it's Carson! - Oh, God, it's Melody!
Yo, man, you have to stop tryin 'to be me with nail things.
-What are you saying, Daly A man? Can you not Carson? -No, that's not what I said '.
It's just that I really am Carson Daly, so it doesn't work now.
Who will break "I am gazoons," man? I'm Carson Daly.
That's pretty good, man. Who else do you do?
I'm Mike Tyson. I will take out your bite.
Okay, what happened? Are you - Is this TRL or not?
This is not TotaI Live Request.
This is more like TotaI Dead Requests.
Yes, you see, ladies, we only have one request for you today. And it kills.
Carson says he will kill us.
Such is the request.
- All right, man, I got blonde. - He is not playing games.
Leave!
Um, this, uh -
this next song is dedicated to, uh -
a friend of mine.
I kind of want to wait until he appears to play it, but I think he -
Whoo-hoo!
Um, the name of this song, uh, "Wish You Felt Same." "I want them to die Josie girls, alright? You get them nurses. I want them dead "
I can't believe you're a murderer?
- You look so good on TV! - Really?
You know, I always think you're a bit hot. Too bad!
- I always think you're a bit hot too yes you do it -what's your sign? -Scorpio.
I'm a Cancer.
Da cat.
Da cat. I have to kill. Good lawd!
What was that? - That's Chris Rock.
That's terrible Chris Rock.
Why do you even bother to do medium impressions? You are not funny.
Do you know who is cute Cosby? Bill.
And he will kill you...
after the spoon sticks to your pudding.
No way! My favorite films are Lady and Tramp.
When are dogs eating spaghetti and they share the same pieces?
And the nose touches them!
You know, if I'm not a key player in the whole...
conspiracy to brainwash young Americans with pop music,
Like, we really can date.
- Do you think? O yes.
You know, that would be really cool, like -
Yes, right. Like ever going out with someone like you.
Now, you, on the other side -
Come on. Let's leave here and find Josie.
Bye.
Josie? Josie, hurry up, open the door!
Josie?
Jo - Josie?
-Josie, we have to talk to you. - How do they let you both here?
I specifically told the front desk "no visitors."
Are you OK? - Of course I'm fine. Why not me?
I have number one in this country.
Both of you, on the other side -
may have to be a little worried.
Josie, Carson Daly tried to kill us, and I think it has something to do with our music.
Why do you call it "our music"?
Becau - Do you even listen?
I am very careful listening,
and do you know what I heard?
I heard someone glomming to my talent...
and my credit.
"Our music", Mel? I basically wrote all of that.
Josie, no, you don't. When writing together.
Oh, okay. So if we all do the same amount of work,
why isn't the band named Valerie and the cat?
I know that. You have thought this all the time.
I'm just - I'm just backing up for you, huh?
Oh, but you're a solid, good backup.
Oh, hey, Val, who is a rock star?
Who is a rockstar?
I
Josie, don't do this.
We need to stay together now.
Oh, God. Melody will cry.
What, hare huddled -
finally realized that in this world not all suns and rainbows?
Stop it. Not everyone gets a happy ending, muffin.
Stop knowing. And what do you want?
Puppies turn into dogs...
who gets old and dies.
One day you will thank me.
Of course, at that time I will not take your call.
You are a star! Val and Melody, mean, bad girls!
You must have a solo career!
You have number one in this country!
They try glom on your talent and your credit!
If they are doing the same amount of work,
why isn't the band named Valerie and the cat?
They're dead just heavy, Josie.
You can be big without them. You are a star.
Big and Madonna. Val Melody which means, crime girls.
Melody thinks you can't sing. Serious. She says.
Dump them. Trying to destroy you, Josie.
You will be better off without them.
Who is a rock star !? You are a big big rock star!
Go, Josie, leave! Go!
- Val! - Oh, the return of the superstar!
What happened to Val? And where is Mel and?
Since when did you do it, did you care? Oh, and we hear what you say, Bitchy McBitch.
- I wish I said it. - They left, Josie.
They are gone, and I hope you are happy. There are no more bands.
Just like the Beatles... Just like the Jackson Five Just like a herd from Seagull.
- This is very good. Do you want this? - Okay, look,
I never thought I'd say this to you,
ever, but, please... will you help?
Now...
Wyatt gave me a CD from our song,
, and it feels like I heard - I don't know.
What - is it sucked?
There's something here, I swear.
Okay, okay, okay.
You must have a solo career!
You can-prime your own TV series!
We can call it Josie, and run it after Will and Grace!
Oh, God! That's Mr. Moviefone! How can you put it there?
You sleep with him!
What are you talking about? This is on our CD It's under music.
Wyatt put them there... to brainwash me.
Ooh, indoctrination!
Ooh, help! We are being brainwashed!
Diet Coke is a new Pepsi.
"MS" Main. - Main system.
Music sequence?
Gosh.
You might solve it. Wow, I didn't touch it.
Josie and the cat are the best bands ever!
They are all vests'! You have to buy their CD
You must see them at the concert.
You also have to buy Steve Madden shoes.
Heath Ledger is the new Matt Damon.
You are a nobody without Abercrombie & Fitch vintage tee.
They sell goods through our music.
Josie and the cat are the best bands ever!
They sell US through our music!
I know there's a reason you're so popular.
I want a vintage tee... and Heath Ledger.
Gosh,
This is all my fault... everything -
people dress together, buy the same item.
I sold it to them.
I'm a pimp trend.
Well, stop here! Pimp I'm not there,
and I won't let Wyatt and Fiona go with this.
We will go to the police, and we take this with us.
Will you help me or what?
Oh, I will help. Yes, right.
"Because you know I'll just let you walk out of here and ruin everything. Alright, now the show I know everyone is finally waiting here.
Just one night, Josie's worldwide concert debut and cat. And, oh, it's very cold, it will come alive in "Megarena"...
with simultaneous global web cast. You can log on to mtv.com for more details. And:
You won't hear anything without your headphones Josie 3 DX,
so I urge you all to choose some up - I know I bought two.
Hi.
Oh, seeing a sullen girl. Boo-hoo!
Well, it's best to snap from it, red, because you have an event to wear!
Are you kidding me? I will not play, help you send messages to children.
- Forget it. I am done. - Oh, look who has all of a sudden principle.
You don't mind when your song goes to one number!
You have to kiss my cellulite free ass for all I do for you.
I raised you as a rock star.
Tell me you don't like it.
I said forget that, okay? Now, find yourself another girl.
Yeah, look, I'll,
but everyone is here!
- Josie! Josie! - Too bad.
- Wyatt. -Josie!
- Val, Mel! - Don't talk to him. You are wasting your time.
Miss Diva here doesn't care if you do something for us.
No, that's not true. You just listen to me.
I don't mean all those things I said before.
Fiona and Wyatt have placed subliminal messages under our music track -
Can it, rusty. Your boring story.
Wyatt, why don't you show the two beautiful women we have for them tonight?
It's nice, honey.
- A car! Val, I won a car! - No, you don't win the car.
- Oh, God, you won the car! - Nobody wins the car!
That car... is to be part of history...
if you decide not to play tonight.
Hi, I'm Serena Altschul with MTV news.
Josie and the cat's debut concert were suddenly canceled...
when a car explodes in a stadium parking lot.
Passengers were identified as Valerie Brown and Melody Valentine,
two of the founding members of the popular rock band.
The investigator at the scene cited the words of two dead fiery slow-dead,...
in a four-wheeled hell hole.
We were told that Josie would release a statement...
to the press within an hour to comment on this tragedy.
Yes, Josie, what's your comment? Choking We all know.
Do you bake friends, or play the program?
Play showing you that? Bake a friend? Does that have to be?
Alright.
I will play.
Look, Val? He still likes us!
Mel, of course I did. You are my best friends on the planet.
Listen, I know that friends don't treat each other like I treat you.
But you have to trust me. If I can go back to the past, I will take it all back.
It will be cold. If I can go back to the past, I want to meet Snoopy.
Mel, I love you that around you!
I like that you think that everything is possible...
and that this world is a good place, because you know what?
This.
And I'm very sorry if, for one second, I make you think it's not.
And Val - Val,
You bought me my first guitar.
And, you know, we might have started this band together,
but the only reason we have come so far is because of you.
Now, look. I don't care if we are Josie and a cat,
or Valerie and cat or anyone and cat.
That doesn't matter as long as we are together.
You're my sister, Val. Love.
I love you too, Jose.
- And I love you, Josie Val. And I love you ,. - And I love you, Mel.
And I - I scream, you shout, we all scream for ice cream.
Everyone loves everyone.
Now, let's start this event!
We want to show! We want to show!
So, what is this time, Fiona -
cross-trainer, pizza bagel, lip gloss?
Oh, bigger - a lot, much bigger.
You will have a hard time selling your secret messages once from you.
Oh, and say, cookies - who will believe?
Who will get silly ramblings behind one, helpless stupid girl?
We will.
Who are you?
Someone you think you will get rid of.
- Oh, God, it's Les from Dujour! - Les?
I tried to warn you - message to your mirror.
Is that you? Dujour in the bathroom!
I love you, Les!
-But I think you were killed in a plane crash. - That's what I thought. Wyatt?
Oh, well, we managed to land the plane well.
Unfortunately, it was in the parking lot of a Metallica event.
Well, fans beat that crap out of us.
Well, you don't look too bad.
And I thank God every day I know the words for 'Enter Sandman'.
Word, Doc. He won't just get away with it - not this time.
Come on, boys, Dujour-style!
By the way,
Oh, now, come on!
Boy, you almost got me.
To be honest, girls all over the world will kill in your position,
and here you stand, run away from it.
Why?
So you can crawl back to "Shitdale" and spend the rest of your life...
Washed with your loser friends, idiot and mopey there?
Already!
Just stop there, miss.
Wyatt, you messed up the wrong thing with the vagina.
- Do you want to? Come on Bring! No, no,
No, baby, no! Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!
Ooh!
What are you going to do - kill me with a guitar?
Who will go there and sing? You need me, remember?
Need You? Doll, I created you,
and, trust me, I can destroy you.
- I'm sorry. Do you need that? - Wyatt! Fix it!
You - what is your job !? Fix this
Oh, it's too late! They have taken off their ears!
Fiona is the most 'vest in the world!
Everybody Loves Fiona! He has the best hair and the most awesome clothes!
And he is so thin! I know I want to be like Fiona!
That's the secret message you want to send - that you are cool?
What?
- That's not me, I swear. - You didn't do it right!
Hey, that's my job!
If l wath a guy, I'm athk coming out.
- If l wath a girl, I want her to be friends forever. - What is wrong with your voice?
We will be holding a party and then up each other's hair and tickling fights!
Oh, thure.
Forward and laugh.
You don't know what it wants to be teathed and ridiculed throughout your life.
The thilver thells thwans down by theathore which is thilver. Theven -
The thwims -
I tried, right?
Which I once wanted to become popular wath.
- Tell me, what's the bad tho? - Lisa?
- What did you call me? - Lisa Snyder?
"Litha Lithping"?
That-That-It wath my nickname in thchool.
Huntington High School.
Lisa, it's me - Wally Wally. "White-donkey."
White-ath Wally? Albino impothible child? Ththat
- Ofall Firth, he wathn't Britith. I do not
I just started talking like that because...
I think this will make me more attractive.
- He wath tho pale. - Makeup.
III learn thpeak without a lithp.
Look at it.
I can't believe your it'th thn't. Am I the cointhidenth thtrangetht?
Wait.
Oh, I've been holding that in for the past 15 years.
This is very romantic.
Yeah, at a.... creepy, like ironic ofway.
So, what is the moral story here -
Freaks Freaks must be another date?
No, I think the moral of the story here is that you have to be satisfied with who you are.
This time all of us have spent money on expensive clothes to impress people.
Don't make me happy. Not! Happ - Oh, my goodness.
Happiness is inside .. I'm not this I'm not what I use.
I'm not what I use!
You have to think about this.
Oh, please wackjobs. Unlike you a lot, l am perfect like me.
God! The girl has skunks on her head!
Oh, my goodness but. That's all. Sorry about your hair. It's messed up.
- Who are you? - I'm Agent Kelly. I'm with the government.
Oh, thank God! Did you know...
that Fiona and Wyatt used machines to send subliminal messages through our music?
They try to make mindless teenage forces,
to make them buy things and even control their thoughts. What are they?
Oh, come on. You know about thith from the beginning.
- Gentlemen, arresting the woman and that person... - What?
on charges of conspiracy against young Americans.
- You can't theriouth. - Oh, I'm serious, ma'am.
This is a very serious violation.
Sorry, but they're for us. Someone must take the fall.
You are bathtard!
Also, after the concert, we will stop your operation anyway.
We found that subliminal messages work much better in movies.
Alright, let's go.
Now, now that you've finished saving the world,
I think you have a concert to play.
Give it to Josie and the cat!
Josie! Josie! Josie! Josie!
I will release this.
don't,
I know you all came here tonight because you heard something you like on our CD
We will play something for you tonight differently - something you don't hear.
It's cool if you like it. It's okay if you don't.
Only... decide for yourself.
This is for someone who says he is confident in me.
Kinda hopes she is here now.
Josie! Josie!
- Alan M! -Josie!
What are you doing here? - I have to tell you that...
even though you don't feel the same way about me...
like I did you, and even though you didn't come to my concert -
What do you mean to say? My Wyatt was canceled!
that dick!
What do you mean about me-not-feel-about-you-as-you-do-about-me?
That's what I came here to tell you McCoy! Josie, I -
I love you! I love you!
I love you too! I am always there!
Hi. Hi.
Damn it!
zo.
Contains excitement.
Why do you have to beat me, man? It will only stop.
Can you see me and my nose in the microphone?
From the command center we control everything...
except what I will say next.
I can't even believe that they let me take -
You sleep with him!
You should make her face make her new face. Ah-ah-ah.
You know that my mother died. That's just -
Next to the weather -
Okay, what's wrong with you?
Goodness, won't save us please?
Hey, my rabbit ears!
Sh -
This is what our operation is - I spit right only on the camera.
Yes, right. Because you know I only want
Vest '!