0 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:20,000 1 00:01:33,827 --> 00:01:34,942 Got some. 2 00:02:24,947 --> 00:02:28,383 - Dad peed in his pants. - Get used to it, son. 3 00:02:28,547 --> 00:02:30,617 When I'm old, you'll have to change my diaper. 4 00:02:36,227 --> 00:02:38,946 Another year over. I can't believe it. 5 00:02:39,107 --> 00:02:40,859 I can't believe our sons are 7. 6 00:02:41,027 --> 00:02:43,416 In a couple years, they'll be starting a band... 7 00:02:43,587 --> 00:02:45,020 ...growing their hair long... 8 00:02:45,187 --> 00:02:47,064 ...stealing your Suburban to go on tour. 9 00:02:49,027 --> 00:02:52,178 Charlie, we have ourselves a situation. 10 00:02:52,347 --> 00:02:53,621 Okay, I'll be a minute. 11 00:02:53,787 --> 00:02:54,856 Phil. Phil. 12 00:02:56,467 --> 00:02:59,265 Rare. Good. See? 13 00:03:00,547 --> 00:03:02,617 Save room for cake. 14 00:03:10,267 --> 00:03:13,498 Never mind that on the cake. 15 00:03:16,707 --> 00:03:18,777 - Hey, Mom. - Hey, slow down. 16 00:03:18,947 --> 00:03:23,099 It was the end of Summer Olympiad between us and our rival camp. 17 00:03:23,267 --> 00:03:25,337 The final event: The relay race. 18 00:03:25,507 --> 00:03:28,419 Coming down the stretch, I was flying like the wind. 19 00:03:28,587 --> 00:03:30,179 You were sweating sheets of rain. 20 00:03:30,347 --> 00:03:32,178 You could barely move in a straight line. 21 00:03:32,347 --> 00:03:34,144 - I was still in the lead. - Whatever. 22 00:03:34,307 --> 00:03:37,026 I hand the baton to Charlie, he drops it, we lose everything. 23 00:03:37,187 --> 00:03:40,338 Then Lance Warner flew right past you to the finish line. 24 00:03:40,507 --> 00:03:44,386 I hated that snot-nosed little brat. He's why I didn't have a good time. 25 00:03:45,547 --> 00:03:49,096 Honey, why is Ben going on and on about going off to camp? 26 00:03:49,267 --> 00:03:51,781 The permission slip's been on the fridge for three weeks. 27 00:03:51,947 --> 00:03:54,256 He really wants to go, and I think he should. 28 00:03:54,427 --> 00:03:57,464 Well, Phil and I have talked, the boys aren't going. 29 00:03:57,627 --> 00:04:00,221 - What do you mean? - I mean, they're not going. 30 00:04:00,387 --> 00:04:02,617 All those snakes and spiders and wedgies. 31 00:04:02,787 --> 00:04:05,506 Just because you had a bad experience as a kid at camp... 32 00:04:05,667 --> 00:04:07,703 ...doesn't mean our son will have one too. 33 00:04:07,867 --> 00:04:11,496 - What are you talking about? - I was there. You were scarred for life. 34 00:04:11,667 --> 00:04:13,976 I'm on the ground, staring up at my father. 35 00:04:14,147 --> 00:04:16,058 He stands there with a look of disapproval. 36 00:04:16,227 --> 00:04:18,946 Just over some stupid camp game. 37 00:04:19,107 --> 00:04:22,782 I won't allow my son to let anything like that happen to him. 38 00:04:22,947 --> 00:04:26,257 He will know I love and support him no matter what. 39 00:04:27,107 --> 00:04:30,144 Good. Then you can love and support him going to camp. 40 00:04:30,307 --> 00:04:32,502 You didn't hear what I just said? 41 00:04:32,667 --> 00:04:37,104 Yes, I did, and he's not you, and you definitely are not your father. 42 00:04:38,307 --> 00:04:41,026 Oh, and you're driving them. 43 00:04:58,787 --> 00:05:00,664 There it is. Camp Canola. 44 00:05:02,867 --> 00:05:05,256 You don't want to go to rival Canola. 45 00:05:05,427 --> 00:05:06,940 But that's where everyone goes. 46 00:05:07,107 --> 00:05:10,144 No, if you wanna go to camp, you wanna go to Driftwood. 47 00:05:10,307 --> 00:05:12,457 Yeah, Camp Canola's some rundown shack... 48 00:05:12,627 --> 00:05:14,299 ...on a piece of swamp land. 49 00:05:31,587 --> 00:05:33,976 At least, it used to be. 50 00:05:39,267 --> 00:05:42,304 - Cool. - Awesome. 51 00:05:52,067 --> 00:05:54,023 It's a lake. I don't remember a lake. 52 00:05:58,467 --> 00:06:00,298 Well, this ain't nothing. 53 00:06:00,467 --> 00:06:02,298 Wait till you see where you are going. 54 00:06:02,467 --> 00:06:03,741 Camp Driftwood. 55 00:06:16,507 --> 00:06:17,826 What the heck? 56 00:06:24,387 --> 00:06:27,265 Yeah, well, you're crazy, Morty. That's the best offer... 57 00:06:27,427 --> 00:06:29,497 ...you're ever gonna get for this craphole. 58 00:06:29,667 --> 00:06:33,660 I'm doing you a favour, butthead. You're crazy, Morty. 59 00:06:34,307 --> 00:06:37,344 - Are you folks lost? - No, we're here to check out the camp. 60 00:06:38,787 --> 00:06:41,665 You want to bring your kids here? 61 00:06:44,547 --> 00:06:47,186 That's beautiful. 62 00:06:47,907 --> 00:06:48,896 Yeah. 63 00:06:50,867 --> 00:06:53,620 Hey, good luck with that. 64 00:07:00,067 --> 00:07:01,864 Okay, kids, come on. 65 00:07:02,027 --> 00:07:04,177 Didn't you hear? Camp's closed. 66 00:07:04,347 --> 00:07:05,416 - Yes. - Yes. 67 00:07:05,587 --> 00:07:08,340 What happened? This place used to be the best. 68 00:07:08,507 --> 00:07:12,056 Well, now seems like everybody wants newer, better... 69 00:07:12,227 --> 00:07:14,616 ...properly licensed and bonded. 70 00:07:14,787 --> 00:07:17,984 They want Camp Canola down the road. 71 00:07:18,147 --> 00:07:19,580 You guys went to Driftwood? 72 00:07:19,747 --> 00:07:21,339 Yeah, we were here when we were kids. 73 00:07:21,507 --> 00:07:25,659 Then you know. This place really used to be something special. 74 00:07:25,827 --> 00:07:29,661 And Canola was a dump. Then some rich family bought it... 75 00:07:29,827 --> 00:07:33,456 ...eventually turned it over to that mutant son of theirs. 76 00:07:33,627 --> 00:07:35,299 What's gonna happen to Driftwood? 77 00:07:35,467 --> 00:07:38,618 Well, soon I'm gonna have no choice but to sell it to Canola. 78 00:07:38,787 --> 00:07:43,099 It's a pity. Because all he wants to do is bulldoze over it. 79 00:07:43,267 --> 00:07:44,541 Can you believe it? 80 00:07:44,707 --> 00:07:48,336 That kid has been a pain in my heinie since he won the '77 Olympiad. 81 00:07:49,027 --> 00:07:52,861 I just hate to give that jerk Lance Warner the satisfaction. 82 00:07:55,147 --> 00:07:56,216 Warner? Lance Warner? 83 00:07:56,387 --> 00:07:58,298 He wants to buy this camp and tear it down? 84 00:07:58,467 --> 00:07:59,456 Our camp? 85 00:07:59,627 --> 00:08:01,026 You bought a what? 86 00:08:01,187 --> 00:08:03,906 Not the whole camp, a partnership with the original owner. 87 00:08:04,067 --> 00:08:06,627 I know the day care centre has been successful... 88 00:08:06,787 --> 00:08:09,096 ...but you've spent a lot fixing this house up... 89 00:08:09,267 --> 00:08:10,541 ...to accommodate more kids. 90 00:08:10,707 --> 00:08:13,824 The Daddy Day Care brand means a lot in this town. 91 00:08:13,987 --> 00:08:16,706 Re-purposing that brand into summer is just smart business. 92 00:08:16,867 --> 00:08:18,380 Do you know how to run a camp? 93 00:08:18,547 --> 00:08:21,857 That's just it. I'm not gonna run the camp, Uncle Morty is. 94 00:08:22,027 --> 00:08:23,745 Phil and I are just gonna help out. 95 00:08:23,907 --> 00:08:26,137 So I'll spend as much time with Ben as possible. 96 00:08:26,307 --> 00:08:27,740 But you hate the outdoors. 97 00:08:27,907 --> 00:08:31,741 Yes, but I hate Lance Warner more. No way my son's going to his camp. 98 00:08:31,907 --> 00:08:35,422 Please just send him to Canola. That's where all his friends are. 99 00:08:35,587 --> 00:08:36,656 No. No way. 100 00:08:38,227 --> 00:08:43,426 Listen, my father sent me to camp and it didn't go so great. Okay? 101 00:08:43,587 --> 00:08:46,943 Maybe I can give Ben the positive experience I never had. 102 00:08:49,627 --> 00:08:51,902 Just promise me you'll let... 103 00:08:52,067 --> 00:08:54,456 ...this Uncle Morty do the real outdoorsy stuff. 104 00:08:54,627 --> 00:08:56,538 I don't wanna have to send a search party... 105 00:08:56,707 --> 00:08:59,096 ...to come rescue your lost butt in the woods. 106 00:09:03,267 --> 00:09:06,543 Come on, Sally, now, don't play hard to get. 107 00:09:06,707 --> 00:09:08,060 Oh, you little tease. 108 00:09:08,227 --> 00:09:10,616 Oh, you... I've gotcha. 109 00:09:13,267 --> 00:09:15,656 It's another beautiful woodchuck day, baby. 110 00:09:15,827 --> 00:09:18,466 Hey, that's great. You remember the old cheer. 111 00:09:18,627 --> 00:09:22,142 I can't thank you guys enough. I mean, you saved the old place. 112 00:09:22,307 --> 00:09:24,867 Yeah, well, with your help, I'll show that Lance Warner... 113 00:09:25,027 --> 00:09:27,063 ...how to run a good old-fashioned summer camp. 114 00:09:27,227 --> 00:09:29,422 Swell. I'll see you guys in September. 115 00:09:29,587 --> 00:09:30,576 Say what, now? 116 00:09:31,667 --> 00:09:33,020 Uncle Morty? 117 00:09:34,627 --> 00:09:37,664 Excuse me. Morty, you can't leave. 118 00:09:37,827 --> 00:09:40,785 You're supposed to be overseeing the camp. We're partners. 119 00:09:40,947 --> 00:09:43,097 I've been watching over this camp for 30 years. 120 00:09:43,267 --> 00:09:45,827 It's time I took a vacation, partner. 121 00:09:45,987 --> 00:09:48,057 Don't worry. Dale here will show you the ropes. 122 00:09:48,227 --> 00:09:52,061 - He's the best counsellor I got. - No, Morty, wait. You can't leave. 123 00:09:52,827 --> 00:09:54,783 Wait. Come back. 124 00:10:03,227 --> 00:10:05,616 What was that about? 125 00:10:06,227 --> 00:10:07,865 This is my first day. 126 00:10:22,147 --> 00:10:23,819 Charles Hinton? 127 00:10:23,987 --> 00:10:26,899 - I'm Charlie. - I'm from FM J Bank. 128 00:10:27,667 --> 00:10:30,022 No doubt your uncle Morty informed you of the liens... 129 00:10:30,187 --> 00:10:32,826 ...we have against your property. - Informed? 130 00:10:32,987 --> 00:10:34,943 He just took his little fishy up the road. 131 00:10:35,107 --> 00:10:36,540 As the business has no clients... 132 00:10:36,707 --> 00:10:38,743 ...therefore no discernible means of income... 133 00:10:38,907 --> 00:10:41,865 ...the bank will have no choice but to foreclose on the property. 134 00:10:42,027 --> 00:10:43,096 - Foreclose? - Foreclose? 135 00:10:44,547 --> 00:10:46,299 Let me ask you something. 136 00:10:46,467 --> 00:10:49,300 What if this camp could show discernible means of income? 137 00:10:49,947 --> 00:10:51,221 Continue. 138 00:10:51,387 --> 00:10:53,662 We have run the Daddy Day Care Center... 139 00:10:53,827 --> 00:10:55,738 ...successfully for the past several years. 140 00:10:55,907 --> 00:10:58,467 Allow us to use the hard-earned trust that name brings... 141 00:10:58,627 --> 00:11:00,060 ...to build in new clientele. 142 00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:02,738 I suppose I could recommend to the bank... 143 00:11:02,907 --> 00:11:05,660 ...that we extend the debt for about a month. 144 00:11:05,827 --> 00:11:08,182 Assuming, of course, that you can maintain the camp... 145 00:11:08,347 --> 00:11:10,542 ...and a client base of at least 30 children. 146 00:11:11,147 --> 00:11:13,342 We'll have it in tiptop shape in no time. 147 00:11:22,787 --> 00:11:26,143 Yeah, you got a methane problem, all right. 148 00:11:26,307 --> 00:11:28,377 Gonna have to have that baby pumped. 149 00:11:28,547 --> 00:11:29,662 Oh, crap. 150 00:11:29,827 --> 00:11:32,705 Yeah, you said it. Gonna need a whole new septic tank... 151 00:11:32,867 --> 00:11:36,223 ...new plumbing, the works. Cost you about 14. 152 00:11:36,387 --> 00:11:38,298 - Hundred? - Thousand. 153 00:11:38,627 --> 00:11:42,063 You know what? We'll buy the kids gas masks. 154 00:11:42,227 --> 00:11:44,866 It's your party, pally, but that methane is dangerous. 155 00:11:45,027 --> 00:11:47,541 You boys best be careful. 156 00:11:50,947 --> 00:11:54,940 - Phil. - What? That wasn't me. 157 00:13:01,027 --> 00:13:02,938 Okay, here's your lunch, sweetie. 158 00:13:03,107 --> 00:13:05,985 It's a sugar-free, wheat-free, gluten-free, tofu nugget. 159 00:13:06,147 --> 00:13:10,265 You have your Sidekick with text, GPS locator in case you get lost... 160 00:13:10,427 --> 00:13:12,736 ...and waterproof sunscreen, in case it gets sunny... 161 00:13:12,907 --> 00:13:15,740 ...while it's still raining. - Mother, it's day camp. 162 00:13:15,907 --> 00:13:17,818 I'll be seven miles away. 163 00:13:17,987 --> 00:13:20,023 And home before dinner. 164 00:13:20,187 --> 00:13:21,666 Did you take your Xanax? 165 00:13:23,387 --> 00:13:25,025 I don't wanna go to camp in the rain. 166 00:13:25,187 --> 00:13:27,257 I wanna stay home watching nudie flicks. 167 00:13:27,427 --> 00:13:30,305 The brochure said there would be sun. Please behave yourself. 168 00:13:30,467 --> 00:13:33,345 And for the love of God, try not to make anyone bleed. 169 00:13:33,507 --> 00:13:35,896 Take your Dramamine now before you get on the bus... 170 00:13:36,067 --> 00:13:37,978 ...then later if you ride a horse... 171 00:13:38,147 --> 00:13:40,377 ...or anything that bounces or gently sways. 172 00:13:40,547 --> 00:13:43,505 - What about my Pepto? - Save that for lunch. 173 00:13:43,667 --> 00:13:46,135 And your Beano, in case you have a snack. 174 00:14:05,347 --> 00:14:08,020 It's another beautiful woodchuck day. 175 00:14:12,387 --> 00:14:16,062 Promise you'll put those games away and try to be social this summer. 176 00:14:16,227 --> 00:14:18,616 Die, alien scum, die. 177 00:14:20,387 --> 00:14:23,026 Carl, please don't let the other kids tease your brother. 178 00:14:23,467 --> 00:14:25,185 What am I? Dr. Phil? 179 00:14:25,347 --> 00:14:28,384 I've got nothing to work with here. 180 00:14:28,867 --> 00:14:30,778 Archibald Lawrence Mapleton? 181 00:14:30,947 --> 00:14:35,418 Call me, Mullet. Business up front, party in the back, baby. 182 00:14:35,587 --> 00:14:37,339 Juliette Stone? 183 00:14:37,507 --> 00:14:39,577 Present. 184 00:14:40,867 --> 00:14:43,586 Holy Hogwarts. 185 00:14:44,227 --> 00:14:47,902 Watch the merchandise, dude. 186 00:15:06,947 --> 00:15:11,304 - I still got it, huh? - I can't hear! My ears! 187 00:15:15,107 --> 00:15:19,544 Okay, this is it. Time to give them a summer they'll never forget. 188 00:15:32,227 --> 00:15:34,457 They won't forget that. 189 00:15:45,347 --> 00:15:48,180 Nature walkers, lotion up. 190 00:15:50,147 --> 00:15:51,978 Okay, Robin Hoods, gather around. 191 00:15:52,187 --> 00:15:53,745 Everybody take a bow. 192 00:15:53,907 --> 00:15:55,340 There you go. 193 00:15:55,507 --> 00:15:57,418 There's enough for everyone. There you go. 194 00:16:13,987 --> 00:16:16,865 Hey, Romeo. If you like her, go in that group. 195 00:16:17,027 --> 00:16:20,702 No. That's okay. I've only got to kill one more Orc. 196 00:16:20,867 --> 00:16:24,462 Right. Kill your Orc, you dork. 197 00:16:24,627 --> 00:16:27,539 Dad, I want to be in the group with Max. 198 00:16:27,707 --> 00:16:30,585 I'm older than these babies. I should be in that group. 199 00:16:30,747 --> 00:16:33,181 I didn't sign up to be with no skirts. 200 00:16:33,347 --> 00:16:34,575 They got cooties. 201 00:16:34,747 --> 00:16:36,226 There's no such thing as cooties. 202 00:16:36,387 --> 00:16:39,220 It's simply a term used to express age-appropriate discomfort... 203 00:16:39,387 --> 00:16:41,184 ...of those not of our gender. 204 00:16:52,067 --> 00:16:53,261 Stop arguing. 205 00:16:57,987 --> 00:17:00,182 You wanted to accommodate children of all ages. 206 00:17:00,347 --> 00:17:02,258 Well, at this point, we can't be too picky. 207 00:17:08,507 --> 00:17:12,182 Look, here we have grass. Some grass and a big rock. 208 00:17:12,347 --> 00:17:13,939 How many more to go? 209 00:17:14,107 --> 00:17:17,463 Everybody gather round. Get in here. 210 00:17:17,627 --> 00:17:20,983 Can anyone tell me what kind of tree this is? 211 00:17:21,907 --> 00:17:23,056 An oak? 212 00:17:23,227 --> 00:17:25,787 Yeah. Sure. Okay. 213 00:17:25,947 --> 00:17:29,144 Look over here, some berries, maybe a strawberry thing. 214 00:17:29,307 --> 00:17:31,537 I wouldn't eat them, though. Watch out. 215 00:17:31,707 --> 00:17:35,700 Poison ivy. Keep moving, slowly, behind the bush. 216 00:17:35,867 --> 00:17:37,937 Come on, slowly. Don't touch it. 217 00:17:38,107 --> 00:17:40,667 Careful, careful. Okay. 218 00:17:41,627 --> 00:17:44,505 That would be a leaf. 219 00:17:45,627 --> 00:17:47,538 Ready. Aim. 220 00:17:47,707 --> 00:17:49,902 Wait. There's a bunny. 221 00:17:50,067 --> 00:17:52,023 We can't shoot with a bunny in the field. 222 00:17:52,187 --> 00:17:54,257 He's way off to the side. You'll never hit it. 223 00:17:54,427 --> 00:17:56,987 Yes, we can. That's good eating. 224 00:17:57,147 --> 00:17:58,375 No, it's not. 225 00:17:59,867 --> 00:18:03,177 Wait. All right, kids, hang on. Back up. 226 00:18:05,147 --> 00:18:07,058 So the rebel Borg rogue vessel... 227 00:18:07,227 --> 00:18:09,616 ...circles around Barkon IV... 228 00:18:09,787 --> 00:18:12,460 ...loops over the Enterprise and doubles back... 229 00:18:12,627 --> 00:18:14,458 ...through the space nebula. 230 00:18:20,627 --> 00:18:23,061 We passed this tree twice already. 231 00:18:23,227 --> 00:18:27,106 Because it's a very important tree and I wanted to emphasise it. 232 00:18:27,267 --> 00:18:28,666 We're not lost. 233 00:18:28,827 --> 00:18:33,025 - Alligator. - Calm down. Stop. Calm down. 234 00:18:33,187 --> 00:18:35,860 Stop. 235 00:18:36,027 --> 00:18:38,780 We don't have alligators on the nature hike. 236 00:18:38,947 --> 00:18:40,539 It's not that good a camp. 237 00:18:41,067 --> 00:18:44,218 See, kids? Everything's gonna be just fine. 238 00:18:44,387 --> 00:18:45,422 Air varmint. 239 00:18:56,187 --> 00:18:58,860 I appreciate that you kids are such quick learners... 240 00:18:59,027 --> 00:19:03,100 ...but these knots are not supposed to be used for evil. 241 00:19:03,267 --> 00:19:07,306 See? Just a big, dumb empty log. 242 00:19:08,867 --> 00:19:11,540 Bees. Scatter. 243 00:19:24,787 --> 00:19:26,743 Now put two thumbs up. 244 00:19:26,907 --> 00:19:29,341 You guys, two, three, or four of you are out... 245 00:19:29,507 --> 00:19:31,543 ...because I didn't say, "Simon says. " 246 00:19:31,707 --> 00:19:33,459 All right, Simon Says. 247 00:19:33,907 --> 00:19:36,819 Ben. Hey, Ben. 248 00:19:38,107 --> 00:19:40,701 Simon says, "Wave at Daddy. " 249 00:19:43,107 --> 00:19:45,905 Good concentration, son. You know, because I'm not Simon. 250 00:19:46,907 --> 00:19:48,818 Good job, Dale. 251 00:19:57,427 --> 00:20:00,783 Oh, no, so many are out right now, I can't even count how many. 252 00:20:05,667 --> 00:20:08,500 - Can I help you? - Felix. 253 00:20:09,667 --> 00:20:13,455 Simon Says. A classic. 254 00:20:15,987 --> 00:20:17,466 I was showing the kids here... 255 00:20:17,627 --> 00:20:19,299 ...where the go-cart track will be... 256 00:20:19,467 --> 00:20:22,459 ...once you and your team of idiots run your camp into the ground. 257 00:20:23,547 --> 00:20:25,822 First of all, it's not for sale. 258 00:20:25,987 --> 00:20:28,660 Yeah, well, from what I heard, that may not be up to you. 259 00:20:29,347 --> 00:20:32,020 Yeah, a little something called foreclosure. 260 00:20:32,187 --> 00:20:34,223 Axe coming down. 261 00:20:35,267 --> 00:20:37,303 See all those kids running around down there? 262 00:20:38,387 --> 00:20:40,218 Does that look like a business in trouble? 263 00:20:40,387 --> 00:20:42,378 It's only day one, buddy boy. 264 00:20:42,547 --> 00:20:46,426 Once all those kids see how much fun we're having at Camp Canola... 265 00:20:46,587 --> 00:20:49,499 ...they'll be jumping ship like harbour rats. 266 00:20:54,267 --> 00:20:55,746 And to make matters worse... 267 00:20:55,907 --> 00:20:59,900 ...you will never be able to beat the Chief in the Olympiad. 268 00:21:00,067 --> 00:21:02,217 That's him. He's the Chief. 269 00:21:02,387 --> 00:21:04,218 And you poop in your shorts. 270 00:21:04,387 --> 00:21:06,776 Nice son you got there, Lance. 271 00:21:06,947 --> 00:21:09,256 He ain't my kid. I hate kids. 272 00:21:12,027 --> 00:21:15,497 First of all, there ain't gonna be any Olympiad. And secondly... 273 00:21:15,667 --> 00:21:18,465 ...I care about building these kids up, not tearing them down... 274 00:21:18,627 --> 00:21:20,538 ...with some futile attempt at competition. 275 00:21:21,307 --> 00:21:22,740 That's pathetic. 276 00:21:22,907 --> 00:21:25,341 You won't last a month. 277 00:21:25,507 --> 00:21:29,022 Yeah. Thirty-one days. Or 30. 278 00:21:29,187 --> 00:21:31,576 Except for February, which stands alone. 279 00:21:33,267 --> 00:21:35,223 All right, let's go. 280 00:21:38,267 --> 00:21:40,656 Dang, he looks familiar. 281 00:21:42,987 --> 00:21:45,057 All right, Camp Canola. 282 00:21:45,467 --> 00:21:47,025 Let's head out. 283 00:21:55,547 --> 00:21:57,742 Wait. Oh, good Lord. 284 00:21:59,867 --> 00:22:03,064 Watch and learn. 285 00:22:07,587 --> 00:22:10,943 - Mullet. Come on. - Hurry up. 286 00:22:11,107 --> 00:22:13,575 I want candy. 287 00:22:36,507 --> 00:22:40,341 Dale, make sure you count them twice. 288 00:22:40,507 --> 00:22:43,783 Everybody on the... Hey, no fighting. 289 00:22:45,107 --> 00:22:47,667 On the bus. Get on the bus. 290 00:22:51,107 --> 00:22:54,099 Oh, thank God. 291 00:22:54,267 --> 00:22:59,057 See? This is exactly where I thought we'd come out. 292 00:22:59,387 --> 00:23:02,424 Get down to the bus. It'll be leaving any second. 293 00:23:02,587 --> 00:23:04,498 I've gotta drop the kids off at the pool. 294 00:23:04,667 --> 00:23:05,656 We have a pool? 295 00:23:06,227 --> 00:23:07,865 No. 296 00:23:10,587 --> 00:23:12,862 This is the worst camp ever. 297 00:23:14,107 --> 00:23:16,177 Thanks for coming. 298 00:23:18,627 --> 00:23:20,697 No, no, Max. All right, no, Max, Max. 299 00:23:21,787 --> 00:23:25,621 Okay, off the bus. Everybody off the bus. 300 00:23:26,147 --> 00:23:29,662 Yes, off the bus. Okay. Okay. Relax. 301 00:23:31,507 --> 00:23:32,940 What's wrong with him? 302 00:23:33,107 --> 00:23:36,224 He was born with no sense of smell. 303 00:23:37,667 --> 00:23:38,861 What's his problem? 304 00:23:39,027 --> 00:23:41,666 - Mayhoffer's gonna blow. - What? 305 00:23:56,187 --> 00:23:59,065 Phil, we got a situation here. I need help. 306 00:23:59,227 --> 00:24:02,742 I need backup. I repeat, backup for... 307 00:24:07,907 --> 00:24:10,102 All right. 308 00:24:17,027 --> 00:24:20,019 Code blue. Code blue, Phil. 309 00:24:24,187 --> 00:24:26,542 - What else could go wrong? - No, please... 310 00:24:43,387 --> 00:24:45,776 I think we're gonna need more toilet paper. 311 00:24:52,827 --> 00:24:54,419 Baby... 312 00:24:54,587 --> 00:24:58,102 ...it's just not your area of expertise. 313 00:24:58,267 --> 00:25:00,622 You need someone with more outdoor experience. 314 00:25:00,787 --> 00:25:02,903 Someone like your father. 315 00:25:03,067 --> 00:25:04,216 You're gonna call Grandpa? 316 00:25:04,387 --> 00:25:07,584 No. Mommy's just making a joke. 317 00:25:07,747 --> 00:25:09,180 I don't need Buck. 318 00:25:09,347 --> 00:25:12,657 Kids all over town are bathing in tomato juice, thanks to you. 319 00:25:12,827 --> 00:25:15,864 It was one lousy skunk and a harmless methane explosion. 320 00:25:16,027 --> 00:25:17,460 Your father's a military man. 321 00:25:17,627 --> 00:25:20,664 You told me yourself Buck knows everything about the outdoors. 322 00:25:20,827 --> 00:25:23,421 Roughing it, managing troops, survival skills. 323 00:25:23,587 --> 00:25:26,784 Yeah, and he realises it through anger, shaming, and criticism. 324 00:25:26,947 --> 00:25:28,824 Here, baby, sponge yourself. 325 00:25:28,987 --> 00:25:32,616 Look, I know that you two have had your problems. 326 00:25:32,787 --> 00:25:34,106 Problems? No. 327 00:25:34,267 --> 00:25:37,259 Nothing I ever did was good enough, including sports, school, work. 328 00:25:37,427 --> 00:25:38,906 But other than that? 329 00:25:39,267 --> 00:25:41,827 He could help, and Ben would be thrilled to see him. 330 00:25:41,987 --> 00:25:44,217 I think it's time you give him a chance. 331 00:25:44,387 --> 00:25:48,175 Look, baby, this is my thing, okay? I'll handle it. 332 00:25:48,347 --> 00:25:51,384 Phil and I got special camp consultants coming tomorrow. 333 00:25:51,547 --> 00:25:53,663 It's a fresh start and a new day. 334 00:25:53,827 --> 00:25:55,419 Consultants? 335 00:25:55,587 --> 00:25:56,656 Yes. 336 00:25:56,827 --> 00:26:01,139 - It's all right here in our Idea Binders. - That's for you. 337 00:26:01,307 --> 00:26:03,867 You just trust us. 338 00:26:04,027 --> 00:26:06,905 - Syl. Come to me. - I'm right here. 339 00:26:07,067 --> 00:26:08,659 Be with me, think with me. 340 00:26:08,827 --> 00:26:11,102 We could have this entire area carpeted. 341 00:26:11,267 --> 00:26:12,859 Shag carpet. 342 00:26:13,027 --> 00:26:15,063 Like a child, a universe grows. 343 00:26:21,147 --> 00:26:22,626 That was a waste of time. 344 00:26:22,787 --> 00:26:25,779 Hey, don't worry. When those 35 kids get off that bus... 345 00:26:25,947 --> 00:26:28,984 ...we're gonna show them adventure, Charlie and Phil style. 346 00:26:40,507 --> 00:26:44,785 Okay. See, Phil, it's all we needed. A new day, fresh start. 347 00:26:46,867 --> 00:26:48,539 Way to go, Dad. 348 00:26:48,707 --> 00:26:50,777 What? 349 00:26:55,227 --> 00:26:58,617 That's all we got. The other parents are demanding a full refund. 350 00:26:59,987 --> 00:27:02,262 Let's go this way, guys. 351 00:27:09,467 --> 00:27:11,139 We only got seven kids left, Phil. 352 00:27:11,307 --> 00:27:13,138 There's no other way to cover these bills. 353 00:27:13,307 --> 00:27:14,979 We can't afford to hire consultants... 354 00:27:15,147 --> 00:27:16,978 ...much less make the foreclosure payment. 355 00:27:17,147 --> 00:27:20,981 We can't even afford to give refunds. That money went back into repairs. 356 00:27:21,147 --> 00:27:23,217 You're gonna have to swallow your pride... 357 00:27:23,387 --> 00:27:25,617 ...and get a man in here to help run this camp. 358 00:27:30,067 --> 00:27:33,423 Historically, the art of using troops is this: 359 00:27:33,587 --> 00:27:36,784 When ten to the enemy's one, surround them with tanks. 360 00:27:36,947 --> 00:27:39,984 At five times the strength, you attack with air strikes. 361 00:27:40,147 --> 00:27:43,662 Napoleon: All manoeuvres were on horseback. 362 00:27:43,827 --> 00:27:46,864 Saladin: Camels... 363 00:27:48,147 --> 00:27:50,217 Colonel here. 364 00:27:51,187 --> 00:27:53,257 Just a sec. 365 00:27:53,747 --> 00:27:55,942 Civilians, you're dismissed. 366 00:28:03,667 --> 00:28:06,101 That's better. How can I help you? 367 00:28:06,267 --> 00:28:08,781 No, no. No, the time is fine. 368 00:28:13,907 --> 00:28:15,579 You don't say? 369 00:28:15,747 --> 00:28:19,103 And that's how you treat an acute poison ivy breakout. 370 00:28:20,467 --> 00:28:23,265 I'd like to apologise to you guys for letting you play... 371 00:28:23,427 --> 00:28:25,099 ...in what I thought was clover. 372 00:28:25,267 --> 00:28:28,816 Jack, I wouldn't go number two for a few weeks if I were you. 373 00:28:28,987 --> 00:28:31,421 I think you used that "clover" for toilet paper. 374 00:28:33,027 --> 00:28:34,938 If you'd all sign these waivers... 375 00:28:35,107 --> 00:28:37,337 ...acknowledging you've been briefed on safety... 376 00:28:37,507 --> 00:28:40,146 - Here you go. Okay. - Excuse me. 377 00:28:40,307 --> 00:28:42,218 With the exception of emancipated minors... 378 00:28:42,387 --> 00:28:44,617 ...I don't believe that a personal injury waiver... 379 00:28:44,787 --> 00:28:47,984 ...with confidentiality clause, executed by a child... 380 00:28:48,147 --> 00:28:50,456 ...is a legally binding document, Uncle Phil. 381 00:28:51,587 --> 00:28:53,737 It's a raid. 382 00:28:56,027 --> 00:28:57,904 Camp Canola! 383 00:29:15,347 --> 00:29:17,463 Get the flag. 384 00:29:39,707 --> 00:29:41,663 I can use the second mortgage on the house... 385 00:29:41,827 --> 00:29:44,182 ...to pay off the bills for the camp? 386 00:29:44,347 --> 00:29:47,703 Great. No, Mr. Thumson, I don't need you to come out here. 387 00:29:47,867 --> 00:29:50,427 No, business is fine. It's just... 388 00:29:50,587 --> 00:29:52,657 You know, we have such a full house. 389 00:29:58,587 --> 00:30:00,498 Can I call you back? 390 00:30:07,547 --> 00:30:09,344 What the heck is going on here? 391 00:30:28,627 --> 00:30:30,902 Open your ear-holes, dweebers. 392 00:30:31,067 --> 00:30:35,379 "We, the mighty troops of Fort Canola, have braved hill and dale... 393 00:30:35,547 --> 00:30:37,458 ...so that we may find... 394 00:30:37,627 --> 00:30:41,176 ...who are the greatest warriors in the land. " 395 00:30:43,387 --> 00:30:46,379 No. No. No way. 396 00:30:46,547 --> 00:30:48,219 You are way out of line, Lance. 397 00:30:48,387 --> 00:30:49,945 Behold! 398 00:30:52,667 --> 00:30:54,737 This spear of honour... 399 00:30:54,907 --> 00:30:59,059 ...garnished with the flame of truth. 400 00:31:00,587 --> 00:31:02,657 Now, I challenge ye... 401 00:31:02,827 --> 00:31:07,582 ...to the XLV Annual Intercamp Olympiad. 402 00:31:09,507 --> 00:31:12,544 That's the 37th Olympiad to you, pea brain. 403 00:31:12,707 --> 00:31:13,935 Forty-fifth. 404 00:31:14,107 --> 00:31:17,338 I told you before, there isn't going to be any competition. 405 00:31:18,907 --> 00:31:22,456 Well, then let the onslaught continue. 406 00:31:46,627 --> 00:31:50,779 Now's your chance. Go say something. 407 00:31:54,627 --> 00:31:56,857 Do you like World of Warcraft? 408 00:31:57,027 --> 00:31:58,142 World of what? 409 00:31:59,587 --> 00:32:02,306 I'm a Level 40 Blood Elf Druid. 410 00:32:02,467 --> 00:32:05,345 I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. 411 00:32:07,747 --> 00:32:09,021 Goodbye. 412 00:32:09,187 --> 00:32:12,543 I like causing destruction, not cleaning up after it. 413 00:32:12,707 --> 00:32:16,222 Is that why you threw a paint grenade at your own campmate during a raid? 414 00:32:16,387 --> 00:32:20,221 What can I say? War is hell, skunk-boy. 415 00:32:21,307 --> 00:32:25,095 Fight. Fight. Fight. 416 00:32:25,267 --> 00:32:27,542 Fight. Fight. Fight. 417 00:32:27,707 --> 00:32:30,858 Cut it out. Stop it. Stop fighting. 418 00:32:32,147 --> 00:32:34,138 A ten-hut. 419 00:32:37,667 --> 00:32:40,465 I see this unit's morale is flagging. 420 00:32:40,627 --> 00:32:43,187 There is only one solution for that. 421 00:32:43,347 --> 00:32:46,305 All of those who are my grandson, front and centre. 422 00:32:46,467 --> 00:32:49,027 - Come here, you little peanut. - Grandpa Buck. 423 00:32:51,187 --> 00:32:52,540 Do you remember this manoeuvre? 424 00:32:52,707 --> 00:32:54,299 Sneak attack at tickle point. 425 00:32:59,547 --> 00:33:03,062 Everyone, this is my father, Colonel Buck Hinton. 426 00:33:03,227 --> 00:33:06,299 - Reporting for duty, corporal. - Please don't call me that. 427 00:33:08,027 --> 00:33:10,461 All right, then, private. 428 00:33:12,187 --> 00:33:16,021 Gentlemen. Ladies. What I just witnessed was a mutiny. 429 00:33:16,187 --> 00:33:18,303 Among campers, that is unacceptable... 430 00:33:18,467 --> 00:33:20,981 ...from this point forward. 431 00:33:21,667 --> 00:33:22,656 Now... 432 00:33:22,827 --> 00:33:24,818 ...front and centre. Double time. 433 00:33:24,987 --> 00:33:28,024 I'll make you soldiers if it's the last thing I do. 434 00:33:28,187 --> 00:33:31,862 No, wait a minute. There is no mutiny. Everything is under control. 435 00:33:32,027 --> 00:33:33,301 This is not why I called you. 436 00:33:34,427 --> 00:33:38,579 - Why the misconduct, soldier? - We got raided by Camp Canola. 437 00:33:38,747 --> 00:33:41,784 - Yeah. - Sneak attack, huh? 438 00:33:41,947 --> 00:33:43,300 Well, I'm sorry, private. 439 00:33:43,467 --> 00:33:45,139 We should be planning a counterattack. 440 00:33:45,307 --> 00:33:48,504 Meet force with force. I say we hit them at nightfall. 441 00:33:48,667 --> 00:33:51,420 - Yeah. - No. No. 442 00:33:51,587 --> 00:33:54,101 Driftwood Day Camp. 443 00:33:54,267 --> 00:33:56,497 Hit them at 5, when the sun's in their eyes. 444 00:33:56,667 --> 00:33:58,100 Yeah. 445 00:33:58,267 --> 00:33:59,985 Okay, guys. 446 00:34:00,147 --> 00:34:02,900 Guys, can you excuse us for a minute? 447 00:34:06,107 --> 00:34:08,143 This is not a boot camp. All right? 448 00:34:08,307 --> 00:34:10,901 We're not looking for Colonel Hinton, war games consultant. 449 00:34:11,067 --> 00:34:13,786 We're looking for Colonel Hinton, experienced team builder... 450 00:34:13,947 --> 00:34:16,336 ...slash King of the Outdoors. 451 00:34:16,507 --> 00:34:18,941 We're not trying to turn these kids into Marines. 452 00:34:21,507 --> 00:34:23,099 What's wrong with being a Marine? 453 00:34:24,627 --> 00:34:26,583 Maybe if you had enlisted... 454 00:34:26,747 --> 00:34:30,786 ...you could work yourself out of a jam instead of calling in reinforcements. 455 00:34:30,947 --> 00:34:33,336 Listen. Yes, I do appreciate your coming. 456 00:34:33,507 --> 00:34:34,906 Yes, we do need your help. 457 00:34:35,067 --> 00:34:38,537 But we don't want to get into this thing with Camp Canola. 458 00:34:39,547 --> 00:34:41,663 - No war games? - No. 459 00:34:41,827 --> 00:34:43,101 Hand-to-hand combat? 460 00:34:45,947 --> 00:34:48,063 - Guerrilla warfare? - No war. 461 00:34:48,227 --> 00:34:49,296 No war. 462 00:34:49,467 --> 00:34:52,027 Just help us run Driftwood, all right? 463 00:34:52,187 --> 00:34:53,779 Can you follow those orders, Dad? 464 00:34:55,387 --> 00:34:57,981 That's colonel to you, private. 465 00:35:00,347 --> 00:35:01,666 Line up. 466 00:35:28,667 --> 00:35:31,386 In through the nose. 467 00:35:31,547 --> 00:35:34,425 Out through the mouth. 468 00:35:35,267 --> 00:35:38,577 In through the nose. 469 00:35:40,707 --> 00:35:43,904 Out through the mouth. 470 00:35:44,667 --> 00:35:46,862 The samurai warrior meditates... 471 00:35:47,027 --> 00:35:52,181 ...to blend mind and body into harmony. 472 00:35:59,707 --> 00:36:01,584 Come here. Come to me. 473 00:36:01,747 --> 00:36:04,739 Hey! Hey! 474 00:36:05,467 --> 00:36:09,176 Hey, old man, what's with the s�ance in the middle of our off-road track? 475 00:36:09,347 --> 00:36:12,180 What? Get them out of here! 476 00:36:12,347 --> 00:36:15,066 Get your kids out of here! Get them out of here! 477 00:36:15,227 --> 00:36:17,457 Somebody's gonna get hurt! 478 00:36:20,507 --> 00:36:22,941 Relax, General Depends. 479 00:36:24,147 --> 00:36:26,297 Shouldn't you be in some bingo game or something? 480 00:36:26,467 --> 00:36:29,823 L-27. G-13. 481 00:36:29,987 --> 00:36:32,501 All right, boys. Let's move them out. 482 00:36:32,667 --> 00:36:37,024 - B-7. - G-40. 483 00:36:37,187 --> 00:36:39,098 That tears it. 484 00:36:39,867 --> 00:36:42,427 Rules of engagement... 485 00:36:43,387 --> 00:36:45,821 ...been overruled. 486 00:36:54,427 --> 00:36:58,579 There's the objective. Anyone unclear on their role? 487 00:36:58,747 --> 00:37:00,021 No, sir. 488 00:37:00,187 --> 00:37:03,224 - Anyone wanna go home? - No, sir. 489 00:37:03,387 --> 00:37:07,539 Operation MoonPie is a go. 490 00:37:13,987 --> 00:37:15,943 It's right up here. 491 00:37:16,987 --> 00:37:19,296 You know, I've never been up here. 492 00:37:35,067 --> 00:37:38,855 Help. Help. Come on, y'all. Give me a lift. Come on, please. 493 00:37:41,787 --> 00:37:43,698 Go, go. 494 00:37:54,267 --> 00:37:58,146 Where is it? Where is it? I know that loser from somewhere. 495 00:37:59,387 --> 00:38:01,617 Where is it? 496 00:38:05,947 --> 00:38:07,858 Jackpot. 497 00:38:10,907 --> 00:38:13,467 Charlie Hinton. 498 00:38:18,627 --> 00:38:19,980 Can I help you? 499 00:38:20,147 --> 00:38:22,422 - Hi, my name's Becca. - I'm Juliette. 500 00:38:22,587 --> 00:38:24,066 And we've come to offer you... 501 00:38:24,227 --> 00:38:26,138 ...the Driftwood Olive Branch of Peace. 502 00:38:26,307 --> 00:38:27,899 In exchange for our friendship... 503 00:38:28,067 --> 00:38:30,262 ...all we ask is that you return our flag. 504 00:38:33,307 --> 00:38:35,867 Did big bad Charlie send his little bitty girls... 505 00:38:36,027 --> 00:38:38,541 ...to do his bidding for him, huh? 506 00:38:38,707 --> 00:38:41,301 Let's put it this way: Either you give it back... 507 00:38:41,467 --> 00:38:43,583 ...or we take it. 508 00:38:43,747 --> 00:38:46,307 You and what army, Petunia? 509 00:38:46,907 --> 00:38:48,226 You had to ask. 510 00:38:52,667 --> 00:38:54,737 Ask what? 511 00:39:00,707 --> 00:39:02,026 What the...? 512 00:39:09,987 --> 00:39:10,976 Get him. 513 00:39:11,187 --> 00:39:13,985 You're messing with Lance Warner. 514 00:39:21,307 --> 00:39:23,218 Stuck. 515 00:39:34,467 --> 00:39:35,502 Yes. 516 00:39:37,347 --> 00:39:38,780 Hey, Warner. 517 00:39:44,707 --> 00:39:46,857 - Yes. - That's my boy. 518 00:39:47,027 --> 00:39:49,336 Sound the alarm. Red alert. 519 00:39:49,507 --> 00:39:52,863 We're under attack. This is not a drill, people. 520 00:39:53,027 --> 00:39:56,815 Everyone to your stations! Security's been breached! 521 00:39:56,987 --> 00:39:59,262 The perimeter's been compromised! 522 00:39:59,427 --> 00:40:01,497 Lock the gates! Call my dad! 523 00:40:05,787 --> 00:40:07,903 Hey, Dale, you seen Buck? 524 00:40:08,067 --> 00:40:10,103 Supposed to be back with the kids an hour ago. 525 00:40:10,267 --> 00:40:11,700 I wouldn't sweat it. 526 00:40:11,867 --> 00:40:16,019 Your dad's like the most responsible guy I ever met. 527 00:40:16,667 --> 00:40:19,261 Yeah, you're probably right. 528 00:40:22,747 --> 00:40:25,625 Get back here, you little rodents. 529 00:40:25,787 --> 00:40:27,015 Come on. Come on. 530 00:40:27,187 --> 00:40:31,738 No! No, no, no. Give me my pants back. 531 00:40:31,907 --> 00:40:33,022 Here's your diaper. 532 00:40:34,427 --> 00:40:36,497 Clean yourself off. 533 00:40:38,307 --> 00:40:39,660 Move out. 534 00:40:42,267 --> 00:40:46,738 Let go. Get back here, you cowards. 535 00:40:46,907 --> 00:40:49,944 No one messes with Lance Warner, you hear me? 536 00:40:50,107 --> 00:40:52,337 No one. 537 00:41:13,507 --> 00:41:15,338 G.I. Joe is turning red. 538 00:41:15,507 --> 00:41:17,338 Someone farted on his head. 539 00:41:17,507 --> 00:41:19,384 G.I. Joe is turning pink. 540 00:41:19,547 --> 00:41:21,299 Someone puked in the kitchen sink. 541 00:41:21,467 --> 00:41:23,185 G.I. Joe is turning white. 542 00:41:23,627 --> 00:41:25,458 The zippers on his pants are really tight. 543 00:41:25,627 --> 00:41:27,379 G.I. Joe is turning blue. 544 00:41:27,547 --> 00:41:29,458 There are peanuts in his poo. 545 00:41:29,627 --> 00:41:31,743 Company, halt. 546 00:41:31,907 --> 00:41:33,181 Where have you guys been? 547 00:41:33,347 --> 00:41:35,781 Your nature hike was supposed to be back an hour ago. 548 00:41:36,387 --> 00:41:38,139 Present colours. 549 00:41:44,387 --> 00:41:46,218 - You didn't? - Yes, sir. 550 00:41:47,027 --> 00:41:48,665 Robert, what happened to your head? 551 00:41:48,827 --> 00:41:51,341 It's just a battle wound. 552 00:41:52,787 --> 00:41:54,778 Dale, go get the first-aid kit. 553 00:41:54,947 --> 00:41:57,745 You take these kids off our premises without permission slips... 554 00:41:57,907 --> 00:41:59,386 ...and bring them back like this? 555 00:41:59,747 --> 00:42:01,021 Affirmative. 556 00:42:01,187 --> 00:42:03,655 See, this is exactly the thing I was afraid of. 557 00:42:03,867 --> 00:42:07,098 We restored our honour, Dad. It was just... 558 00:42:10,267 --> 00:42:14,738 What kind of insane militant nut factory you running here, huh? 559 00:42:14,907 --> 00:42:18,616 Huh, Charlie Hinton? Driftwood Class of '77. 560 00:42:18,787 --> 00:42:21,017 - That's right, I know who you are. - Listen, Lance. 561 00:42:21,187 --> 00:42:22,939 I'm really sorry about this. In fact... 562 00:42:23,107 --> 00:42:25,985 ...my father and I were just about to have a discussion about it. 563 00:42:26,147 --> 00:42:28,502 This is your father? 564 00:42:29,307 --> 00:42:32,265 Oh, this is classic. Oh, sure. 565 00:42:32,427 --> 00:42:34,463 The chicken's come home to roost, huh? 566 00:42:34,627 --> 00:42:37,585 Now I know why you don't want to compete in the Olympiad. 567 00:42:37,747 --> 00:42:39,897 You're afraid of getting your butt kicked again... 568 00:42:40,067 --> 00:42:41,785 ...in front of Lieutenant Prune Juice. 569 00:42:41,947 --> 00:42:43,016 Colonel. 570 00:42:43,187 --> 00:42:45,257 Oh, Colonel. Sorry. 571 00:42:45,427 --> 00:42:49,136 Look, Lance, I'm just trying to teach these kids about sportsmanship. 572 00:42:49,307 --> 00:42:53,505 No, the only thing you can teach these kids is how to lose. 573 00:42:54,427 --> 00:42:55,826 Or have you forgotten? 574 00:42:56,107 --> 00:42:59,861 "Daddy. Look at me. 575 00:43:08,507 --> 00:43:10,941 I'm a failure. " 576 00:43:15,507 --> 00:43:18,783 You know why my parents bought Camp Canola for me? 577 00:43:18,947 --> 00:43:20,175 No, why? 578 00:43:20,347 --> 00:43:23,225 Because that summer when I kicked your butt... 579 00:43:24,507 --> 00:43:26,782 ...that was the best moment of my life. 580 00:43:26,947 --> 00:43:30,098 And now, every day when I wake up, I get to live that dream. 581 00:43:30,267 --> 00:43:32,542 And it is fantastic. 582 00:43:32,707 --> 00:43:34,777 Peaked when you were 11, did you, Lance? 583 00:43:34,947 --> 00:43:37,142 See, I get it, Charlie. 584 00:43:37,307 --> 00:43:40,697 You don't want your kid to end up a loser like you. 585 00:43:42,147 --> 00:43:44,217 Like father, like son. 586 00:43:47,987 --> 00:43:49,978 Oh, sure. No, that's cool. You walk away. 587 00:43:50,147 --> 00:43:52,217 Yeah, because refusing to compete... 588 00:43:52,387 --> 00:43:53,945 ...just proves to the community... 589 00:43:54,107 --> 00:43:56,063 ...which camp they should send their kids to. 590 00:43:56,227 --> 00:43:58,422 Mine. 591 00:43:58,907 --> 00:44:00,625 Adi�s. 592 00:44:06,227 --> 00:44:08,787 What I'd really like to do is kick your butt. 593 00:44:09,467 --> 00:44:12,823 Being as we're trying to set a good example here, mister... 594 00:44:12,987 --> 00:44:15,103 ...you got yourself an Olympiad. 595 00:44:15,267 --> 00:44:16,985 Yeah! 596 00:44:17,787 --> 00:44:20,221 Fantastic. 597 00:44:25,947 --> 00:44:27,346 Yeah. 598 00:44:28,387 --> 00:44:30,105 Good, good job. 599 00:44:30,267 --> 00:44:31,780 The great Julius Caesar once said... 600 00:44:31,947 --> 00:44:34,939 You were way out of line with what you did today. 601 00:44:35,107 --> 00:44:37,667 If we do this, we do it my way. You got it? 602 00:44:39,387 --> 00:44:42,265 - Affirmative. - Good. 603 00:44:42,427 --> 00:44:45,817 Now. What do you think we should do? 604 00:44:48,667 --> 00:44:50,897 A sleepover? 605 00:44:51,067 --> 00:44:52,978 I thought the whole purpose of day camp... 606 00:44:53,147 --> 00:44:55,707 ...was sending the kids home at the end of the day. 607 00:44:55,867 --> 00:44:58,142 It was your idea to get my father involved. 608 00:44:58,307 --> 00:45:00,662 According to Buck, the best way to build team unity... 609 00:45:00,827 --> 00:45:04,183 ...is to put the kids in a new situation where they have to work together... 610 00:45:04,347 --> 00:45:05,496 ...to overcome stuff. 611 00:45:05,667 --> 00:45:09,785 Well, I think someone wants to impress his own father. 612 00:45:10,427 --> 00:45:13,817 Listen, this Olympiad is gonna be good for business. 613 00:45:13,987 --> 00:45:16,820 Once those Canola parents see how well our kids work together... 614 00:45:16,987 --> 00:45:18,625 ...we might drum up new customers. 615 00:45:18,787 --> 00:45:21,142 If you think parents are gonna switch camps... 616 00:45:21,307 --> 00:45:24,344 ...based off of wins some silly events... 617 00:45:24,987 --> 00:45:29,299 Mrs. Hinton? I'm Edward Thumson from the bank. 618 00:45:31,387 --> 00:45:36,063 Yes, I'm aware of who you are, but what are you doing in my house? 619 00:45:36,227 --> 00:45:38,582 Is that real Tiffany crystal? 620 00:45:39,547 --> 00:45:41,026 It is standard procedure to do... 621 00:45:41,187 --> 00:45:43,257 ...a pre-inventory prior to the foreclosure. 622 00:45:43,427 --> 00:45:46,146 But the first instalment is not due until next week. 623 00:45:46,307 --> 00:45:48,184 True. But with only six campers... 624 00:45:48,387 --> 00:45:54,098 ...it is mathematically impossible for... - Actually, there's seven campers. 625 00:45:54,267 --> 00:45:58,101 - What's going on? - Oh, I'll tell you what's going on. 626 00:45:58,267 --> 00:46:00,178 We overextended ourselves with the camp. 627 00:46:00,347 --> 00:46:02,303 Now strange men are touching the furniture... 628 00:46:02,467 --> 00:46:03,946 ...messing with my mama's vase... 629 00:46:04,107 --> 00:46:06,462 ...Mr. Thumson's threatening to take my house away. 630 00:46:06,627 --> 00:46:08,777 Okay, okay. 631 00:46:08,947 --> 00:46:10,903 - I know what I gotta do. - What? 632 00:46:11,067 --> 00:46:13,137 - I'll sell the camp. - Listen to me. 633 00:46:13,307 --> 00:46:15,104 If you believe by winning this Olympiad... 634 00:46:15,267 --> 00:46:16,985 ...more kids will come to the camp... 635 00:46:17,147 --> 00:46:19,661 ...then you go kick some Lance Warner butt. 636 00:47:25,427 --> 00:47:28,339 Come on. Come on, soldier. 637 00:47:36,027 --> 00:47:37,301 Yes. 638 00:47:38,707 --> 00:47:40,186 Ben! Hey! 639 00:48:18,587 --> 00:48:21,465 Come on, son. 640 00:48:21,627 --> 00:48:23,538 - I know the song. - Well, what? 641 00:48:23,707 --> 00:48:26,096 You don't like being in the support vehicle with me... 642 00:48:26,267 --> 00:48:29,418 ...instead of out there with poison ivy, rocks and whatnot? Bugs. 643 00:48:29,587 --> 00:48:34,422 It's supposed to be a hike. I look like a goober. 644 00:48:34,587 --> 00:48:38,262 Okay. You're right. 645 00:48:41,467 --> 00:48:42,695 Oh, look at her. 646 00:48:43,867 --> 00:48:47,098 She even puts on bug spray like an angel. 647 00:48:47,267 --> 00:48:50,577 You're pathetic. Go walk with her. Get your groove on, dude. 648 00:48:50,747 --> 00:48:52,977 What makes you such an expert? You're only 6. 649 00:48:53,147 --> 00:48:56,822 I know I won't spend my best years buried in video games. 650 00:48:56,987 --> 00:48:59,262 Shut up. Don't make... 651 00:49:03,587 --> 00:49:05,100 Here, buddy. 652 00:49:06,307 --> 00:49:09,344 Stop it. Stop it. 653 00:49:10,507 --> 00:49:14,341 Hey, Billy? What's going on? 654 00:49:14,507 --> 00:49:15,940 Nothing. 655 00:49:16,107 --> 00:49:18,496 No wet willies to dish out? 656 00:49:18,667 --> 00:49:20,976 Maybe you could switch over to the purple nurple. 657 00:49:21,147 --> 00:49:23,820 No, I already gave one to Mayhoffer. 658 00:49:23,987 --> 00:49:28,139 It's just... I don't like sleepovers. That's all. 659 00:49:28,307 --> 00:49:29,899 And why is that? 660 00:49:31,707 --> 00:49:35,746 Come on, Billy, you can always trust a fat guy. I won't tell anybody. 661 00:49:35,907 --> 00:49:38,740 Cross my heart, hope to diet. 662 00:49:39,747 --> 00:49:42,784 - I sometimes wet the bed. - What? 663 00:49:43,747 --> 00:49:45,578 I sometimes wet the bed. 664 00:49:48,267 --> 00:49:50,462 You know what? 665 00:49:50,627 --> 00:49:52,902 I had the same problem till I was darn near 10. 666 00:49:53,067 --> 00:49:56,059 Really? What did you do at sleepovers? 667 00:49:56,227 --> 00:49:58,502 An excellent question, my young friend. 668 00:49:58,667 --> 00:50:00,578 I think you'll be intrigued by the answer. 669 00:50:07,147 --> 00:50:09,058 Get that equipment up, Brown. 670 00:50:09,227 --> 00:50:11,104 This is dumb. Why we gotta walk so far? 671 00:50:11,267 --> 00:50:13,417 Far? Halt. 672 00:50:13,587 --> 00:50:15,703 Now you listen up, hippie-hair. 673 00:50:15,867 --> 00:50:17,983 How are you gonna compete against Camp Canola... 674 00:50:18,147 --> 00:50:20,217 ...tomorrow morning with that kind of attitude? 675 00:50:21,347 --> 00:50:24,783 We have 12 events staring at us dead in the eye. 676 00:50:24,947 --> 00:50:26,938 We have got to toughen up. 677 00:50:27,107 --> 00:50:30,782 When I was your age, I used to march six miles into the woods... 678 00:50:30,947 --> 00:50:34,701 ...just to spend the night alone in a tree. Focus on a goal. 679 00:50:37,187 --> 00:50:39,417 I used to put rocks in my backpack... 680 00:50:39,587 --> 00:50:41,657 ...just to get stronger. 681 00:50:41,827 --> 00:50:45,342 That's how you grow up to be a man. Ain't that right, Ben? 682 00:50:45,507 --> 00:50:47,737 All right. Let's head out. 683 00:50:47,907 --> 00:50:50,137 Forward, march. 684 00:50:57,667 --> 00:50:59,578 Hey, Ben. What are you doing there, son? 685 00:50:59,747 --> 00:51:01,339 Nothing. 686 00:51:11,107 --> 00:51:15,419 I'm so full. 687 00:51:17,347 --> 00:51:19,577 I'm fuller than you. 688 00:51:21,507 --> 00:51:23,896 No one's as full as me. 689 00:51:26,307 --> 00:51:29,822 But now I've got room for dessert. Who wants S'mores? 690 00:51:33,347 --> 00:51:34,905 Anything I can help you with? 691 00:51:35,907 --> 00:51:38,137 Can't find the chocolate or the marshmallows. 692 00:51:38,307 --> 00:51:41,026 What are you talking about? They're in my bag. 693 00:51:43,587 --> 00:51:45,782 Who wants chocolate? 694 00:51:48,067 --> 00:51:50,297 What are we gonna roast? 695 00:52:05,747 --> 00:52:09,103 Nice job, Hinton. Your dad is such a schwing. 696 00:52:09,267 --> 00:52:11,417 I gotta roast something with a pit in it. 697 00:52:11,587 --> 00:52:14,465 Shut up. I don't like it any more than you do. 698 00:52:14,627 --> 00:52:15,855 It's not my fault. 699 00:52:19,147 --> 00:52:20,865 Dude, trust me. 700 00:52:21,027 --> 00:52:25,020 A star-filled sky, the warm glow of a fire... 701 00:52:25,187 --> 00:52:28,065 She'll be like Silly Putty in your hands. 702 00:52:28,227 --> 00:52:30,946 What makes you such an expert? 703 00:52:31,107 --> 00:52:33,826 Look, you know how grownups are always saying... 704 00:52:33,987 --> 00:52:36,057 ...they wish they knew then what they know now? 705 00:52:36,227 --> 00:52:39,344 - Yeah. - Well, I know. 706 00:52:39,507 --> 00:52:42,783 How are we ever gonna beat Canola with runts like you on our team? 707 00:52:42,947 --> 00:52:48,146 Yeah. What you gonna do, tiny? Bang your pan until they surrender? 708 00:52:53,987 --> 00:52:56,785 I think I burned my banana. 709 00:53:03,587 --> 00:53:05,498 - Hello. - Hey. 710 00:53:06,467 --> 00:53:08,617 How are you doing this fine evening? 711 00:53:08,787 --> 00:53:12,143 Pretty good. Never roasted a pear before, but it smells good. 712 00:53:12,307 --> 00:53:16,220 Yes, smells are good, and you, too, smell, Juliette. 713 00:53:16,387 --> 00:53:18,696 I mean, things smell... 714 00:53:18,867 --> 00:53:21,825 I mean, good, you smell. 715 00:53:21,987 --> 00:53:25,457 Sorry, it must have been from the hike, because... 716 00:53:25,627 --> 00:53:27,583 No, no, I mean... 717 00:53:29,507 --> 00:53:30,576 It's a nice night. 718 00:53:30,747 --> 00:53:34,456 Starry skies, a warm fire. 719 00:53:34,627 --> 00:53:36,538 Good food. 720 00:53:44,227 --> 00:53:45,546 Idiot. 721 00:53:51,067 --> 00:53:53,422 Great place you got there. What's the mortgage like? 722 00:53:53,587 --> 00:53:54,576 What are you doing? 723 00:53:54,747 --> 00:53:56,658 Sleeping in a hollowed-out log or something? 724 00:53:56,827 --> 00:53:59,102 It's called camping, private. You should try it. 725 00:53:59,267 --> 00:54:01,064 Yes, right. 726 00:54:02,107 --> 00:54:06,737 Jack, I think that banana is about as cooked as it's gonna get there. 727 00:54:06,907 --> 00:54:09,341 It's so slimy. 728 00:54:09,507 --> 00:54:12,021 No, it's roasting. It's supposed to bring out the flavour. 729 00:54:12,867 --> 00:54:15,256 Try it. You'll like it, I promise. 730 00:54:18,787 --> 00:54:21,017 Good, right? 731 00:54:28,427 --> 00:54:29,826 No! 732 00:54:33,587 --> 00:54:34,986 I'm done with that. 733 00:54:35,587 --> 00:54:37,418 That's nasty. 734 00:54:38,227 --> 00:54:40,138 You feel better? 735 00:55:09,587 --> 00:55:12,147 Sure you're gonna need that, son? 736 00:55:15,507 --> 00:55:18,704 Good Lord's filling the sky with a million nightlights. 737 00:55:19,427 --> 00:55:20,496 Just for you. 738 00:55:26,507 --> 00:55:29,624 Don't know why you got your panties in a wad tonight, Mayhoffer. 739 00:55:29,787 --> 00:55:32,665 We're all getting butt spackled tomorrow anyways. 740 00:55:32,827 --> 00:55:34,306 What are you talking about? 741 00:55:34,467 --> 00:55:37,664 You don't seriously think we can beat those rich Canola kids? 742 00:55:37,827 --> 00:55:39,499 Yeah, they're gonna cream us. 743 00:55:39,667 --> 00:55:41,976 Cream? Cream is for coffee. 744 00:55:43,547 --> 00:55:45,663 Okay. Listen up, troops. 745 00:55:47,387 --> 00:55:50,618 It's come to my attention some of you don't believe we can win tomorrow. 746 00:55:51,587 --> 00:55:52,815 Okay. 747 00:55:52,987 --> 00:55:57,026 Maybe they have fancy equipment. Gold-plated toilet paper. 748 00:55:57,187 --> 00:55:59,542 But we got something those snotty-nosed... 749 00:55:59,707 --> 00:56:01,663 ...silver-spoon brats will never have. 750 00:56:01,827 --> 00:56:04,944 - Do you want to know what that is? - Lice? 751 00:56:05,107 --> 00:56:07,416 Driftwood spirit. 752 00:56:07,587 --> 00:56:09,305 I didn't think you guys had it... 753 00:56:09,467 --> 00:56:11,822 ...but the way you pulled yourselves together today... 754 00:56:11,987 --> 00:56:14,581 ...made me prouder than any platoon I've ever led. 755 00:56:16,387 --> 00:56:18,776 - We couldn't have done it without you. - Nonsense. 756 00:56:18,947 --> 00:56:21,620 You couldn't have done it without this. 757 00:56:21,787 --> 00:56:25,336 Because it's Driftwood Camp spirit that links us all together... 758 00:56:25,507 --> 00:56:27,338 ...and makes it all possible. 759 00:56:28,067 --> 00:56:31,582 You're not just a bunch of kids that came together in camp. 760 00:56:31,747 --> 00:56:34,580 You're a team. Team. 761 00:56:34,747 --> 00:56:36,942 - Team. - Team. 762 00:56:37,107 --> 00:56:38,301 - Team. - Team. 763 00:56:38,467 --> 00:56:41,186 Team, team, team! 764 00:56:41,347 --> 00:56:42,575 And listen, team. 765 00:56:42,747 --> 00:56:46,296 Tomorrow, you're gonna take those lobster-eating... 766 00:56:46,467 --> 00:56:47,502 Yeah! 767 00:56:47,667 --> 00:56:49,976 ...those Humvee-driving... - Yeah! 768 00:56:50,147 --> 00:56:53,025 ...Canola cretins and you're gonna throw them in the dumper. 769 00:56:53,187 --> 00:56:55,621 - Yeah! - Yeah! 770 00:56:56,067 --> 00:56:58,706 Yeah! 771 00:56:58,907 --> 00:57:02,297 You don't think you're setting them up for a pretty big letdown? 772 00:57:03,067 --> 00:57:05,501 Well, in order to win the battle... 773 00:57:05,667 --> 00:57:09,023 ...one must first believe in the success of the mission. 774 00:57:09,187 --> 00:57:12,224 It's been a long time since you've been in battle. 775 00:57:13,187 --> 00:57:15,496 A minor technicality. 776 00:57:15,667 --> 00:57:18,465 Hey, have you guys seen Ben? I can't find him. 777 00:57:20,067 --> 00:57:22,297 - Ben? - Ben? 778 00:57:22,467 --> 00:57:23,900 - Ben! - Ben? 779 00:57:25,987 --> 00:57:27,864 - Ben! - Are you in there? 780 00:57:37,667 --> 00:57:40,056 - Ben. - Come out. 781 00:57:43,267 --> 00:57:45,337 Guys, I found him. 782 00:57:45,507 --> 00:57:46,781 Ben. 783 00:57:46,947 --> 00:57:50,940 Ben, get down from there. What are you doing? 784 00:57:51,107 --> 00:57:55,225 Get down. Where you been, man? We been looking all over for you. 785 00:57:55,387 --> 00:57:58,777 Listen, don't ever scare me like that again, you hear me? 786 00:57:58,947 --> 00:58:03,099 I'm okay. I just wanted to be like Grandpa, that's all. 787 00:58:03,267 --> 00:58:06,464 So you wandered off by yourself? You know how dangerous that is? 788 00:58:06,627 --> 00:58:09,187 Grandpa said it's what made him tough... 789 00:58:09,347 --> 00:58:11,907 ...so I thought it'd do the same for me. 790 00:58:12,067 --> 00:58:13,659 What? 791 00:58:16,027 --> 00:58:18,461 All right, guys, listen up. Listen to me. 792 00:58:18,627 --> 00:58:21,141 Let me tell you something about being tough, okay? 793 00:58:21,307 --> 00:58:23,423 Being tough doesn't necessarily make you a hero. 794 00:58:23,587 --> 00:58:28,058 Sometimes tough people grow up to be arrogant, selfish and stubborn. 795 00:58:28,227 --> 00:58:30,297 You guys just need to be yourselves. 796 00:58:30,467 --> 00:58:32,219 And know that by being yourselves... 797 00:58:32,387 --> 00:58:34,298 ...you're gonna be winners, no matter what. 798 00:58:34,467 --> 00:58:36,458 Even if we choke like you? 799 00:58:36,627 --> 00:58:39,539 Especially if you choke like me. 800 00:58:39,707 --> 00:58:40,696 Listen. 801 00:58:40,867 --> 00:58:44,223 I want you guys to grow up to be kind and caring... 802 00:58:44,387 --> 00:58:46,776 ...and accepting of people. 803 00:58:46,947 --> 00:58:49,620 Even if they make mistakes. 804 00:58:49,787 --> 00:58:53,826 So, Ben, don't try to be so tough, okay? 805 00:58:53,987 --> 00:58:57,184 Just try to be your best. That's all that matters. 806 00:58:57,347 --> 00:58:58,462 - Okay. - Okay? 807 00:58:58,627 --> 00:58:59,821 Okay. 808 00:59:01,667 --> 00:59:04,306 Okay, my little Olympians, time to rest up for the big day. 809 00:59:04,467 --> 00:59:06,901 - Oh, come on. - Come on. 810 00:59:10,147 --> 00:59:12,058 Calling Buck, man, what was I thinking? 811 00:59:12,227 --> 00:59:14,138 It's the only way he knows, Charlie. 812 00:59:14,307 --> 00:59:17,185 If that means him jeopardising any more kids, he can keep it. 813 00:59:17,347 --> 00:59:20,862 I don't want Ben to grow up to be anything like my father. 814 00:59:22,147 --> 00:59:24,377 Let's go. 815 00:59:52,707 --> 00:59:54,140 Shoot. 816 01:00:05,347 --> 01:00:08,384 What the heck is...? Oh, you nasty... 817 01:00:11,027 --> 01:00:13,177 This is a mistake. 818 01:00:40,227 --> 01:00:42,138 Wait for me. 819 01:00:49,027 --> 01:00:52,861 Yes. It worked. I'm dry. 820 01:00:53,027 --> 01:00:54,938 See? Told you, Billy. 821 01:00:55,107 --> 01:00:57,496 You always fool the bed-wetting goblins... 822 01:00:57,667 --> 01:00:59,578 ...if you sleep in your day clothes. 823 01:00:59,747 --> 01:01:01,658 Go play with the kids. 824 01:01:19,427 --> 01:01:24,217 Oh, my neck. I'm so cold. 825 01:01:24,387 --> 01:01:26,537 Feel like a human pincushion. 826 01:01:26,707 --> 01:01:30,461 - Relax, Charlie. Look around. - Oh, thank you. 827 01:01:33,347 --> 01:01:35,577 Would you look at that? 828 01:01:35,747 --> 01:01:37,817 They're running around, having a good time. 829 01:01:37,987 --> 01:01:41,821 Oh, Buck's gonna go on and on about how he was right... 830 01:01:41,987 --> 01:01:44,706 ...and I'm way too overprotective. 831 01:01:44,867 --> 01:01:47,427 Buck's not gonna go on and on about anything. 832 01:01:47,587 --> 01:01:49,976 I haven't seen him all morning. 833 01:02:04,227 --> 01:02:07,264 Sign up for camp, please? Driftwood? 834 01:02:07,427 --> 01:02:09,987 Hey, do you wanna sign up...? No? 835 01:02:10,667 --> 01:02:13,420 Well, as you can tell, we've obviously destroyed their camp... 836 01:02:13,587 --> 01:02:14,940 ...over the last couple years. 837 01:02:15,107 --> 01:02:18,622 I'm thinking, once we kick Driftwood's butt one more time... 838 01:02:18,787 --> 01:02:20,823 ...this is where the new hardware goes. 839 01:02:20,987 --> 01:02:23,899 What do you say? It's gonna be great. 840 01:02:24,787 --> 01:02:26,937 Hey, Chuck E. Cheese! 841 01:02:27,747 --> 01:02:29,339 Getting a little nervous? 842 01:02:30,307 --> 01:02:32,662 Let me give you the 411 on the day's events. 843 01:02:32,827 --> 01:02:34,101 Okay. 844 01:02:34,267 --> 01:02:38,146 The Olympiad starts. Your team sucks. You lose. 845 01:02:38,307 --> 01:02:39,899 The end. 846 01:02:41,507 --> 01:02:43,657 Good luck, Lance. 847 01:02:45,347 --> 01:02:46,939 I don't need luck. 848 01:02:54,587 --> 01:02:57,181 Okay, I'll take it from here. 849 01:02:59,427 --> 01:03:02,100 Forfeit! I forfeit! 850 01:03:03,347 --> 01:03:07,101 - Have you seen Grandpa Buck? - Col. Buck has been gone a long time. 851 01:03:07,267 --> 01:03:11,419 Guys, I'm sure he'll be here. Okay, so just reach to the left. 852 01:03:11,707 --> 01:03:12,696 Stretch. 853 01:03:14,547 --> 01:03:17,505 No news yet on Buck. Margaret's driving all over town. 854 01:03:17,667 --> 01:03:19,737 But I did find this in your office. 855 01:03:19,907 --> 01:03:22,467 "Charlie, Uncle Sam called about another job... 856 01:03:22,627 --> 01:03:25,619 ...which is just as well, seeing as things aren't working out here. 857 01:03:25,787 --> 01:03:27,903 Your tough Colonel Buck. " 858 01:03:28,067 --> 01:03:30,422 - I'll keep looking. - Okay. 859 01:03:30,587 --> 01:03:32,703 Is that from Grandpa? 860 01:03:34,147 --> 01:03:36,377 Yes. Yes, it is. 861 01:03:36,547 --> 01:03:39,220 He's not coming back? 862 01:03:39,387 --> 01:03:41,582 Well, no. 863 01:03:41,747 --> 01:03:44,341 He's the one that showed us how to do everything. 864 01:03:44,507 --> 01:03:46,896 We're gonna get whupped. I don't get whupped. 865 01:03:47,067 --> 01:03:48,386 I do the whupping. 866 01:03:48,547 --> 01:03:50,936 We're doomed. Doomed, I tell you. 867 01:03:51,107 --> 01:03:52,699 Wait, wait, wait a minute. 868 01:03:52,867 --> 01:03:56,223 Just because Buck got called away to serve his country last night... 869 01:03:56,387 --> 01:03:59,743 ...doesn't mean we take everything he taught us and just let it go to waste. 870 01:04:00,867 --> 01:04:03,665 - He deserted us. - Without so much as a "see you. " 871 01:04:03,827 --> 01:04:07,740 No, no, no. He didn't. It's here in the letter, listen. 872 01:04:07,907 --> 01:04:10,626 "Dear Ben, Max, Juliette, Robert... 873 01:04:10,787 --> 01:04:14,860 ...Carl, Jack, Becca, Billy, and Mullet: 874 01:04:15,027 --> 01:04:17,939 Sorry to leave in the night without even saying, 'See you'... 875 01:04:18,107 --> 01:04:21,338 ...but it's important that you don't panic. 876 01:04:21,507 --> 01:04:24,544 The 103rd Airborne is staging manoeuvres tonight... 877 01:04:24,707 --> 01:04:28,985 ...and let's just say they could learn something about teamwork from you. " 878 01:04:29,147 --> 01:04:32,219 The 103rd was retired after World War II. 879 01:04:32,387 --> 01:04:34,537 Tell you what? They're bringing it back. 880 01:04:34,707 --> 01:04:37,938 - We can't do this without Buck. - Yeah. 881 01:04:38,107 --> 01:04:41,019 Sure we can. You know what? He would've wanted it that way. 882 01:04:41,187 --> 01:04:43,098 You know why? Because we're a family. 883 01:04:43,267 --> 01:04:46,384 We'll pull each other up, because that's what families do. 884 01:04:46,547 --> 01:04:49,664 If family's so important, why'd Grandpa Buck leave? 885 01:04:49,827 --> 01:04:51,579 Yeah. 886 01:05:09,107 --> 01:05:11,905 - Going that well, huh? - Best day of my life. 887 01:05:12,867 --> 01:05:15,427 Well, Ben seems upset about Buck leaving. 888 01:05:16,227 --> 01:05:17,501 Yeah. 889 01:05:18,627 --> 01:05:22,779 You know why grandkids and grandparents get along so well? 890 01:05:22,947 --> 01:05:25,256 They're united by a common enemy. 891 01:05:26,627 --> 01:05:28,219 Makes sense. 892 01:05:29,347 --> 01:05:33,659 I'm saying, if you and Buck could unite around each other's strengths... 893 01:05:33,827 --> 01:05:36,182 ...Ben could have the best of both worlds. 894 01:05:39,267 --> 01:05:41,986 Go get them, coach. For all of us. 895 01:05:49,187 --> 01:05:53,021 Good news. Found this in Buck's cabin. 896 01:05:56,387 --> 01:05:59,424 I'll watch after the kids. You go make things right. 897 01:05:59,587 --> 01:06:01,179 Thanks. 898 01:06:43,427 --> 01:06:45,987 You missed your train. 899 01:06:46,627 --> 01:06:49,505 I missed a train. 900 01:06:49,987 --> 01:06:52,376 Haven't really decided which one I'm getting on yet. 901 01:06:54,467 --> 01:06:56,662 I thought you had to be back for manoeuvres. 902 01:06:56,867 --> 01:07:00,064 That's true, but next year. 903 01:07:00,547 --> 01:07:03,584 That's about as often as they let a broke-down retiree... 904 01:07:03,747 --> 01:07:05,817 ...come out and play with the reservists. 905 01:07:08,867 --> 01:07:10,744 "Retiree. " 906 01:07:14,307 --> 01:07:16,696 About the only action I get these days... 907 01:07:16,867 --> 01:07:19,586 ...is when college students are doing... 908 01:07:19,747 --> 01:07:22,056 ...research papers on military history. 909 01:07:26,947 --> 01:07:28,380 So... 910 01:07:28,547 --> 01:07:31,744 ...you abandoned your post this morning. 911 01:07:31,907 --> 01:07:34,626 Good soldier knows when he's in hostile territory. 912 01:07:35,707 --> 01:07:38,426 You heard me last night, didn't you? 913 01:07:38,747 --> 01:07:42,740 I guess I've had a few things on my mind over the last... 914 01:07:42,907 --> 01:07:45,102 ...30 years or so. 915 01:07:45,947 --> 01:07:48,541 I didn't even know you felt that way. 916 01:07:51,867 --> 01:07:54,427 Strange, getting older. 917 01:07:56,347 --> 01:07:59,703 Easier remembering things the way you wish they were. 918 01:08:04,347 --> 01:08:06,781 I want you to know I'm proud of the man you've become. 919 01:08:09,827 --> 01:08:11,863 The way you make adjustments in the field... 920 01:08:12,027 --> 01:08:15,383 ...like opening a day care centre when you lost your job. 921 01:08:18,747 --> 01:08:20,658 Me, I wouldn't be able to do that. 922 01:08:23,587 --> 01:08:26,147 I've always needed more structure. 923 01:08:30,427 --> 01:08:35,057 I'm far from perfect, believe me. Far from it. 924 01:08:39,547 --> 01:08:43,256 I know one thing though, those kids are gonna be crushed... 925 01:08:43,427 --> 01:08:47,102 ...unless your leathery old butt comes back. 926 01:09:02,747 --> 01:09:04,385 Do you smell gasoline? 927 01:09:34,587 --> 01:09:35,906 That's right. 928 01:09:41,907 --> 01:09:46,139 Minor setback, people. We'll get them in the next event. 929 01:09:46,307 --> 01:09:49,140 Wrestling? Have you seen Max wrestle? 930 01:09:49,307 --> 01:09:51,218 He's right. I suck. 931 01:09:51,387 --> 01:09:55,665 Yeah. And that Canola guy's hairier than my grandmother's mole. 932 01:09:55,827 --> 01:09:56,816 We're stewed. 933 01:09:56,987 --> 01:09:59,262 Can't we just go home? This is embarrassing. 934 01:09:59,427 --> 01:10:01,895 No one's going anywhere until we win this thing. 935 01:10:02,067 --> 01:10:05,298 - Grandpa Buck. - Yay. 936 01:10:05,467 --> 01:10:08,664 Okay. Hands in, soldiers. 937 01:10:12,787 --> 01:10:15,665 It's another beautiful woodchuck day. 938 01:10:18,267 --> 01:10:22,101 I knew you'd come back, Grandpa. We couldn't do this without you. 939 01:10:22,267 --> 01:10:25,339 That's where you're wrong. Your dad is the hero. 940 01:10:25,507 --> 01:10:26,496 My dad? 941 01:10:29,787 --> 01:10:32,779 Don't you realise he did all this just for you? 942 01:10:33,787 --> 01:10:36,506 You're pretty lucky to have Charlie Hinton... 943 01:10:36,667 --> 01:10:38,897 ...as a father. 944 01:10:39,507 --> 01:10:42,579 He's a better soldier than I'll ever be. 945 01:10:43,227 --> 01:10:45,104 I could never run a camp like he can... 946 01:10:45,267 --> 01:10:47,656 ...or watch over you and your mom like he does. 947 01:10:48,347 --> 01:10:51,384 He may be a little overprotective... 948 01:10:51,547 --> 01:10:54,619 ...but it's only because he loves you so much. 949 01:11:01,947 --> 01:11:05,906 - Colonel, we've got a problem. - Yeah, dude. 950 01:11:06,067 --> 01:11:08,058 What's the situation on the ground, soldiers? 951 01:11:08,227 --> 01:11:11,742 My calculations suggest they've cheated in nearly every event. 952 01:11:13,027 --> 01:11:14,938 Cheaters, huh? 953 01:11:15,747 --> 01:11:16,975 Well... 954 01:11:17,147 --> 01:11:20,617 ...the only way to beat cheaters is by outsmarting them. 955 01:11:21,987 --> 01:11:23,420 I've got an idea. 956 01:11:23,747 --> 01:11:26,056 Okay. Okay, okay. 957 01:11:26,267 --> 01:11:29,339 First, we're gonna need the skunk. 958 01:11:29,507 --> 01:11:33,295 Here we go. Come on, good D, thattaway. 959 01:11:33,467 --> 01:11:35,697 Thattaboy. There we go. 960 01:11:35,867 --> 01:11:38,540 Ref, come on, man. I'm growing old. 961 01:11:40,507 --> 01:11:41,986 Look, here he comes. 962 01:12:31,227 --> 01:12:33,183 Ref. Substitution. 963 01:14:14,387 --> 01:14:16,457 Good job, Robert. Good job. 964 01:14:16,627 --> 01:14:18,936 Yeah, thattaway, purple. There we go, yeah. 965 01:14:27,267 --> 01:14:30,464 That's too bad, Driftwood. That's tough luck. 966 01:14:30,627 --> 01:14:34,176 Good hands, though, kid. Good hands. 967 01:14:36,707 --> 01:14:41,223 We've got a sharpshooter. We gotta do something. 968 01:14:42,747 --> 01:14:45,307 Give me a balloon. 969 01:14:46,587 --> 01:14:50,262 Billy? The water pump's over there. 970 01:14:50,427 --> 01:14:53,783 No, I'm not filling it with water. 971 01:14:53,947 --> 01:14:58,896 I've been holding this in all night. 972 01:15:06,427 --> 01:15:09,658 You shouldn't pick on kids smaller than you. 973 01:15:12,547 --> 01:15:14,902 Yeah. Good catch. Good catch. 974 01:15:15,067 --> 01:15:18,616 It's pee! It's pee! It's pee! 975 01:15:18,787 --> 01:15:22,063 It's pee! Mom, it's pee! 976 01:15:24,387 --> 01:15:25,502 Yes! 977 01:15:30,107 --> 01:15:33,622 We're the tiebreaker. We're gonna get the tiebreaker. 978 01:15:36,227 --> 01:15:40,300 It's another beautiful woodchuck day. 979 01:15:46,427 --> 01:15:48,497 Suck it up. Let's go. 980 01:15:48,667 --> 01:15:51,545 Jeez, embarrassing. 981 01:15:56,987 --> 01:15:59,547 Okay, let's go get them. Remember what we talked about. 982 01:15:59,707 --> 01:16:02,301 We need this one. We need this one. 983 01:16:02,747 --> 01:16:05,022 That look familiar, Charlie? 984 01:16:05,187 --> 01:16:07,860 You lose this, it's d�j� vu all over again. 985 01:16:08,027 --> 01:16:11,417 Yeah, well, I got my best athlete here, waiting to change history. 986 01:16:11,587 --> 01:16:13,259 Let's go, buddy, come on. 987 01:16:14,587 --> 01:16:15,736 You okay? 988 01:16:15,907 --> 01:16:20,025 I twisted my ankle when I fell. I could shoot the arrow fine, but... 989 01:16:20,187 --> 01:16:24,226 - But can you climb? - I don't know. I don't think so. 990 01:16:24,387 --> 01:16:26,264 You can forfeit, Charlie, if you like. 991 01:16:26,427 --> 01:16:29,578 No, no, that's okay. Who's our best climber? 992 01:16:35,507 --> 01:16:39,580 - I can do it, Dad. - All right. Come on, son. 993 01:16:41,467 --> 01:16:44,140 You're gonna race that kid. That's gonna be tough, huh? 994 01:16:44,307 --> 01:16:46,741 - Yeah, real tough. - Like father, like son, huh? 995 01:16:46,907 --> 01:16:48,545 Don't listen to him. Come on. 996 01:16:48,707 --> 01:16:50,743 All right. Come on, let's go. 997 01:16:50,907 --> 01:16:52,818 - All right. - Go get him. 998 01:16:52,987 --> 01:16:55,547 Okay, Ben, listen to me. 999 01:16:55,707 --> 01:16:57,777 Whatever you do... 1000 01:16:58,107 --> 01:17:01,304 ...don't drop the baton, okay? 1001 01:17:02,907 --> 01:17:04,499 Ben. 1002 01:17:04,667 --> 01:17:07,386 Just enjoy it. 1003 01:17:13,827 --> 01:17:15,499 Okay, here it comes. 1004 01:17:15,707 --> 01:17:18,426 All right, focus. Here we go. 1005 01:17:19,267 --> 01:17:20,620 Come on, Ben. 1006 01:17:39,107 --> 01:17:40,301 Go get him. 1007 01:17:40,827 --> 01:17:42,738 - Go Ben! - Go Ben! 1008 01:17:44,707 --> 01:17:47,824 - Come on. Get up there. - Come on, Ben. 1009 01:17:47,987 --> 01:17:51,423 - Get them little legs going. - Come on, Ben. 1010 01:17:51,587 --> 01:17:52,702 Go, Ben. 1011 01:17:53,347 --> 01:17:55,383 Come on, Ben. 1012 01:18:01,827 --> 01:18:03,818 It's okay. It's okay, son. 1013 01:18:04,027 --> 01:18:06,905 I told you, you're a loser, just like your old man. 1014 01:18:07,067 --> 01:18:08,785 You're not a loser, Ben. 1015 01:18:08,947 --> 01:18:12,622 He greased the wall. He's cheating. 1016 01:18:13,307 --> 01:18:16,936 No, don't listen to her. She's a compulsive liar. 1017 01:18:17,107 --> 01:18:19,496 And she steals. 1018 01:18:19,667 --> 01:18:23,262 - You cheated. - You're a cheater. You're a cheater. 1019 01:18:23,427 --> 01:18:27,215 Canola cheats. He's cheating. He's a cheater. 1020 01:18:27,387 --> 01:18:30,902 He's a cheater. Canola cheats. He's a cheater! 1021 01:18:31,067 --> 01:18:34,742 Ben, no, no. Get down from there. That's dangerous, Ben. 1022 01:18:34,907 --> 01:18:37,819 Ben. Please, please, Ben. Ben, get down from there. 1023 01:18:38,907 --> 01:18:41,296 No, no, that's dangerous. Ben, that's dangerous. 1024 01:18:43,227 --> 01:18:44,785 Pounce, Bobby J. Here we go. 1025 01:18:45,267 --> 01:18:46,700 Up that wall. 1026 01:18:49,907 --> 01:18:51,260 Bobby J, go, go, go. 1027 01:18:51,427 --> 01:18:52,940 Go! 1028 01:19:08,667 --> 01:19:11,420 That's my baby. That is my... That's my baby. Yeah! 1029 01:19:11,587 --> 01:19:15,023 Oh, whoa, hey, what...? Hey. All right, Bobby J, come here. 1030 01:19:15,187 --> 01:19:16,984 - Come here, buddy. - I did it, Daddy. 1031 01:19:17,147 --> 01:19:20,298 - I know it, buddy. - I love you, Dad. 1032 01:19:21,307 --> 01:19:25,346 I love you too, son. I love you too, you crazy kid. 1033 01:19:25,507 --> 01:19:27,065 You call that Canola? 1034 01:19:27,227 --> 01:19:29,616 That was embarrassing. What are you, a moron? 1035 01:19:29,787 --> 01:19:31,664 Moron? You're the moron. 1036 01:19:36,667 --> 01:19:38,897 Wall coming down. 1037 01:19:43,827 --> 01:19:47,581 That's for telling everyone you're not my dad. 1038 01:19:47,747 --> 01:19:49,783 I'm so excited. I'm so excited. 1039 01:19:49,947 --> 01:19:53,019 Let's go tell my mom. She's here to pick me up. 1040 01:19:53,187 --> 01:19:56,020 You were really great in the Egg Relay. 1041 01:19:59,867 --> 01:20:03,655 What'd I tell you? Chicks love gold medallists. 1042 01:20:03,827 --> 01:20:06,102 Teach me everything you know. 1043 01:20:06,267 --> 01:20:09,816 Well, first you got a bird, and then you got a bee. 1044 01:20:13,867 --> 01:20:15,698 Why? 1045 01:20:15,867 --> 01:20:18,062 Why? 1046 01:20:21,667 --> 01:20:23,100 Okay. 1047 01:20:23,267 --> 01:20:25,622 - Mr. Hinton? - Hi. 1048 01:20:25,787 --> 01:20:28,938 All the parents think Camp Canola may not set... 1049 01:20:29,107 --> 01:20:30,904 ...the best example for our children. 1050 01:20:31,067 --> 01:20:33,945 And so, if it's not too short of notice... 1051 01:20:34,107 --> 01:20:37,622 ...we'd like our kids to come to your camp as soon as possible. 1052 01:20:37,787 --> 01:20:40,824 Too short notice? Don't be silly. There's room enough for everyone. 1053 01:20:40,987 --> 01:20:45,617 Yeah, Dale and I can sign all you guys up. Welcome. 1054 01:20:48,867 --> 01:20:51,779 - It was really my son who did all this. - Colonel? 1055 01:20:52,507 --> 01:20:54,941 Job well done. 1056 01:20:58,267 --> 01:20:59,825 Just call me Dad. 1057 01:21:08,827 --> 01:21:10,624 Hey, what do you say we go get the trophy? 1058 01:21:10,787 --> 01:21:13,665 - Yeah! - Okay.