Terrorists?
I forgot to turn off the coffee pot again, right?
Damn it!
Now where will I bring a woman to make love
when was my mother home?
well, are you ready for your last day?
already.
When did you and your girlfriend move to Florida?
Tomorrow morning.
The car is all ready.
You want to do crazy things
before leaving New Jersey forever?
How long do you know me?
If I were you, I would write "eat pussy"
on the side of the building in uppercase letters.
Why?
Let them know you've been there, bro.
I'd rather let them know I'm not a bastard.
it's too late for that.
I really will miss you, bro.
I can't believe they haven't done anything with it.
God will do it.
He destroyed the hell hole.
pretentious berate.
What do you mean to tell me You don't miss that place at all?
certainly not
you?
Of course not.
You know, sometimes I hope to do something in my life
instead of hanging out in front of the shop selling marijuana and whatever.
Like, maybe become a veterinarian.
Why not me?
I like sea lions and mess.
Or maybe an astronaut.
Yes.
Like, being a bastard who first saw a new galaxy
or find a new alien life form...
and fuck her.
And people like, "That is it.
Earth people who once mugged Martians."
Gosh.
Our first customer since the return of our victory.
relaxed.
Wait.
do you hold goods?
yes, everything except cocaine, heroin and penism.
What?
What about one envelope, bro?
Oh, 15 dollars, little friend put the money in my hand.
Nong, nong, nagga- nagga-nong nong-.
He likes to sing.
I haven't seen you lately, bro.
where have you been?
Me and Silent Bob finally bought a car,
we drove to the Boardwalk...
fucking Middletown police stop us
because of suspicion of small mischief.
What does that mean?
We drive around with open airbags.
The police stopped us.
They found 2 pounds of Jamaican lambswool.
Prosecutors want to sue us mercilessly,
but the judge gave us rehabilitation instead.
Damn, rehabilitation?
Yup-yup.
How long have you been in rehab?
Six months, sir.
We are in a six-month rehab and two days in a cart
as a good friend of Bill W.'s.
pay attention to this.
Just got two days ago, before we left.
Yes, but if you hold it all the time,
won't you be tempted to get drunk?
Oh, not with the strength of Christ by my side, sir.
What is the Bible?
Hey, hey, holy bible, son!
distributor of the kind of fuck from jesus worshiper
do you introduce me?
I like them, bro. They are funny.
They are stupid.
You have to read the Bible, sir.
You will find all the weird things there.
Like, do you know Jesus is a Jew?
Yes.
I need two Egga-Muffins Mooby,
and we've almost run out of fries.
Wait.
Now, Randal!
well, what did you write there,
your memoirs?
I fight
this bastard on his blog message board.
What about?
About how he has too much free time and no life.
So is the man who has heated up on his website.
I can't help it. he pisses me off.
very poor in a wheelchair
who always prey on _ everyone's sympathy,
writes a long criticism about how he will never walk again
and how pedestrians should appreciate grace the function of their feet.
The scolding, as you call it,
sounds like poor people with disabilities
who pours out his heart and feelings.
Oh, forget him, bro.
Trying to blame me back and forth because he was limping?
What kind of bad thoughts are that?
So I have started fighting with him,
replying back to face defects are stupid
about how I'm happy just sitting around and how I prefer to take the car to the end of the block instead of walking.
That person is in a wheelchair.
Yes. That's why I call him a disabled child.
enjoy.
basic freaks.
I won't even show irony here.
What's your problem?
What do I do now?
There is a paralyzed man who found a way
reaching the world where he feels isolated,
and you somehow found the way to have a problem with him.
Of course, side with him.
Are you very hurt
until you now feel the need to attack a disabled person?
what defects?
That person only sits in a wheelchair.
This isn't like she's Anne Frank or something.
Anne Frank?
Yes, Anne Frank, the girl who...
... Until miracles appear
and generate intelligence in him.
you mean
Helen Keller.
No. I mean Anne Frank.
He is deaf, dumb and blind.
not him.
Helen Keller is deaf, dumb and blind.
Are you sure?
Yup.
Then who is Anne Frank?
Anne Frank is a small Jewish girl
hiding from the Nazis in a secret room with his family.
He writes a diary.
Oh, yeah.
Well, then I guess this person is like Anne Frank,
with a diary, you know?
No, he's like Helen Keller with his disability, jerk!
You must always be right, right?
basic Nazi bastard.
What? What do you want?
No, we don't serve Cow Tippers in the morning.
Freedom Toast might work.
Oh, we really did it.
Okay, that's $ 12.64.
take care of your eyes, obscene.
It's very unhygienic.
that's all I'll tell you.
Emma, are you like this
because you have a big _ clitoris that isn't fair?
You just told him, right?
This is kind of curhatan.
He said it was very big,
almost like a small penis...
which explains all strange things about him
which I don't even want to think about.
You don't want it with a girl with the clitoris oversized?
No, because the next stop is a man with a small penis.
You're a little tense.
Because you're a little close to me.
I can retreat, if you want.
Can we go back to our own apartment in Florida?
Really? Fuck, Dante.
How many times do we have to
talking about this?
There's no point in getting an apartment again.
My mother often tells us
that he will give us a house as a wedding gift.
Your parents' generosity
just makes me a little uncomfortable, Em.
They give us a house.
Your father gave me one of the businesses Cleaning the car for me to run.
That feels a bit strange.
Dear, it feels weird because you're very used to it by living destitute all the time.
What's the meaning?
I mean that suddenly,
there is a woman who loves you,
new job opportunities
and a fantastic life for the future, right?
you have to face it, tiger. You won the lottery.
how are you?
Is something wrong?
No.
Just see you talking.
I think I'm going to come here and join you guys.
God, it must be nice have a job
with a lot of rest time.
important breaks.
If I have to deal with all the protestors
without stopping, without resting,
I will put my head in the frying pan.
my testicles, too.
Do you really want
sit here and see me and my fiance make love?
- Are you such a jerk? - Not really.
I was going to ask you two to stop that
while I'm out here.
I really don't understand why can't you be happy
for your best friend.
He finally found a woman who loved him.
to me you are definitely not a girl.
maybe you are a man too.
Really?
Yes. You're my best friend's boyfriend.
You become a person who can't be invited to sleep for me when he started tricking your pussy.
So think of me in terms of a decent girl
kinda scares you, right?
dear, I don't think of you in terms of a decent girl.
I don't think about you in any way...
Oh, that's very wrong.
If you don't leave here
so that I can spend time having fun with my boyfriend,
Next, I'll show you my pussy.
Why do you want to do something like that?
Okay, I'm leaving!
God!
what did you do that for?
You realize he just thinks you're trying
invited him to a threesome with us now, right?
Yes, right. With Graves?
he's a very idiot, like most Jersey men.
Hey!
you speak loudly, but when we cross national borders,
I'm sure you got all the sentimental people in Jersey and shed tears.
Yes, tears of happiness, maybe.
Jersey sucks,
and we are surrounded by fools.
yes, I want to go.
Do you want to go?
Yes, there are lots of jobs that I have to do before we leave in the morning, but I love you.
I love you too.
daghh
Bro, I'm pretty sure your girlfriend wants
you and I are together with a threesome.
Bro, how old are you?
You know I'm 19 years old, Randal.
You don't want to work with me last week, remember?
Because you said it worked on my birthday
will help me build character.
Well, at least you spelled "penis" correctly this time.
Why are you still riding
your mother's vehicle?
And even worse,
for what do you give him a farewell kiss?
Is he dating your dance party?
don't bother me today, Randal.
my mood is very good.
Because your mother gave you a kiss of lust?
No, because I just read online that there will be
a Transformers live-action film.
And?
Well... I mean, as you know,
My online handle is Optimus Prime.
I know that. I hope I'm not.
Well, so it's not just awesome that there will be a live-action Transformers movie,
but I, like, is positioned or whatever
as well as possible Handle the web and e-mail
when the movie comes out.
Oh, you will roll over in the vagina, bro.
Don't be rude.
The man who just said
making love to his mother.
Mr. Dante!
don't bother Elias, Randal!
Don't look at his penis.
Bro, Transformers are bad.
Oh, no.
They are more attractive than anything.
They can beat Ranger Danger (TV shows) every day.
Yes. I will have trouble sleeping wondering if you are right
- About that or not. - Ow.
I thought you weren't even allowed to watch TV often in your house because you people are _ devout Christians and whatever.
Well, it turns out, cars and trucks
which changes to...
robots aren't really blasphemous,
because my pastor says
that the machine can change into another machine,
and it's not magic that is against God.
Transformers are total magic that is against God,
because God sent Only his only son
to die on the cross to atone for the sins of mankind,
and what we do for redeeming it is just
make a terrible cartoon fucking like Transformers.
good shot.
Well, 'because in the Bible camp, we made a diagram which...
I mean, I don't know,
sort of, prove it or whatever it is...
Well, okay...
Bible Camp ?!
since God created...
since God created man,
and humans created Transformers...
Transformers are like a gift from God, Randal.
No, sir. They are not gifts from God.
They are unholy curses from animals that we call the Desolate One (music album).
I really don't want to hear this, Randal.
The first one falls,
hidden virgin,
ruler of abortion!
You know I don't like to talk about dark forces, Randal.
Let me help you
get up from your chair, Grandma!
Grandma, what is it like
are on vacation?
Late at night, I woke up from my sleep Hear unknown voices
Crazy laughter...
what is that?
What?
that wave.
I saw Becky, so I waved.
He'll be here in 20 seconds.
And?
And you have to welcome it
before he came here, damn licker?
what is that all about?
This is called friendship.
She's your boss.
You can't be friends with your boss.
No, you can't be a friend your boss.
I like my boss.
I think something has happened
between you two.
You're crazy.
You spend a lot of time talking to him.
I also spend a lot of time talking to you.
And I always keep it
You keep a homosexual interest in me.
We are only friends.
That's what I keep telling you.
No, idiots, me and Becks.
"Becks"?
I know that.
You cheated on the boss.
Yes, that's why I moved to Florida with my fiance.
Why do you want to cheat? with girls your age, bro?
If you want to sow your wild wheat seeds,
there are many beautiful women
who stopped here after school.
First, I'm not having an affair from my fiance.
Second, if I have an affair from my fiance,
it's not going to be with a teenager.
Why not?
The best part of this job
are all pretty old women who come here.
And they all see me,
Because I have a SIM.
That's awesome. your age is 33.
show me one 33 year old girl
which is as if wild in bed
like her 17 year old partner.
17 year olds are now crazy.
They want anything.
They even like it if you do anal lick (danger ne).
God.
What?
Are you serious?
I'm not playing at that time anal story lick.
never do anal lick.
not my idea at all.
Young girls today are all passionate,
and they told you to do anal lick.
don't ever do anal lick, Randal!
You sound like my mother.
Becks, have you done anal lick?
never do anal lick.
Have you ever done anal lick?
never do anal lick.
I never did anal lick.
Not once?
Even though.
you two are very depressed.
Okay, listen,
I know you gave a blow job, right?
I haven't even put my bag down.
That's yes.
And I know you've been blowing a woman's pussy.
What do you mean?
Well,
after you finish 'sucking' forbidden part
your lover, you kissed him, right?
That's exactly like anal lick.
Okay, I'm pretty sure you're just comparing the vagina with the rectum.
And?
Have you refilled all the napkins?
That's Elias's job.
it's a comparison pink and brown eyes
it's just been your job Randal.
Zing!
Shut your mouth, GoBot.
I might be able to sue All of this company now
for sexual abuse.
You just made me work on refilling the napkin
because I cling to to faith
anal subject lick.
never do anal lick!
will you mature?
All right, I will say this
Because we are friends...
but sometimes, in a hot atmosphere,
it's forgiven for doing anal lick.
I know that.
I'm so bored, man!
And boredom is the first step towards recurrence of bad habits.
Oh!
Do you want to fuck me?
I will fuck myself
I will fuck myself hard.
Damn.
Well, hello, Miss Scott.
Well, here it is, the artist who escaped.
I haven't left.
oh... please. You've gone last month.
when did you leave?
Well, we start driving tomorrow morning.
I left you my address
for my last payment this month.
So you want to.
That's his parents' house, right?
Yes, but only until marriage.
And then, from what I heard,
His parents gave us a house.
Good!
So I thought the dowry came back again.
Oh, yeah.
His father sweetened the kettle with two fat calves and a goat
I'll miss you, Hicks.
Yes, I will miss you.
I still can't believe it
You will leave me alone in this place...
with Randal Graves, from everyone.
Exit.
Moving to Florida.
You can work in washing the car with me.
Wow, you made it sounds really tempting.
How can I say no?
Oh, yeah, because car washing is in Florida.
Like anything worse than this place.
throw insults as you wish, male friend.
As soon as my uncle stood again,
I will not stay here.
- Hey, how are you? - Much better.
It only takes two years and lots of chemo,
but... the number of red blood cells almost returns to normal.
That's good.
Yes, that's good for me, too.
A few weeks in this damn hut
changed to a few years a little too fast.
But, Hicks, we can sit here
small talk about your last day
and what I will do after you leave,
or we can treat today like other workdays.
Ding-a-ling-a-ling!
Randal.
One ring to master everything.
And you want to know why there isn't a woman you want to enter.
I never wondered about that.
Yeah, because you've always been
accept the fact that you will never get a girl.
I can get girls if I want.
Who do you believe in?
You won't be able to get girls, losers.
You're too weird and sad.
I reject women left and right.
Your woman is the "left" and "your right."
Yes, right. What do you know?
I know you're the geekest kid
from the fixed, and there are no women who like nerds,
especially nerds who like Lord of the Rings.
women like Lord of the Rings, Randal.
Yes. type of woman
who likes swords and elves and whatever,
and I will not fuck them with the torch Gondor.
Oh, you are so dirty!
Hey, bro.
Welcome to Mooby. Can I take your order?
Yes...
let's see.
Give me one Udderly Delicious Moo-ilk Shake,
Skinny Calf and order onion ring. thanks.
"One ring to master everything."
"One ring to find them."
God.
"One ring to bring them all."
"And in the darkness binds them."
Yes! bro!
How many times?
three times 'Fellowship',
twice 'Towers',
four times 'Return'
Five times 'Return'
bro!
Okay, listen,
there is only one 'Return', okay,
and it's not king... it's Jedi.
Oh, Star Wars addict.
Oh, am I an addict?
See you two, wasting your honor.
You have to forgive him.
He doesn't understand the trilogy.
Oh, what happened to this world?
There is only one trilogy,
stupid.
Do you know what?
Maybe we should start calling your friend Padme (senator star wars),
because he really likes wax statues
Skywalker, right?
"Danger, danger. " My name is Anakin.
my poor acting has ruined the saga. "
Yes, you jar crazy.
Oh, I'm crazy?
That damn hobbit movie is very boring. it's all just a group of people walking. Three films of people walking to the volcano.
This is the first film.
And this is the second film.
He's far away. Losers.
Are you ready for the third film?
Even the damn tree runs in a movie.
Do you know what?
I have enough with you.
Your simple analysis of the trilogy excludes,
The Lord of the Rings is the biggest achievement that
even the Academy is aware of
when they awarded Peter Jackson... Best Directing Oscar...
an award that your little friend George "kid toy" Lucas never
and will never win.
cas.
Oh, burns.
Let me tell you something.
If Peter Jackson really wants to satisfy me with the "The Rings" movie, it should end the third
at the logical closing point,
not the 25 endings that follow.
what logical closing point?
Yes, friend,
tell us.
When the Frito wakes up from his small comma or whatever,
and these little hobbits jumping up and down on their beds,
and Sam leaned against the doorway
and give him a very gay gaze.
Don't Rings, Randal.
Say what you want about Jesus,
but don't despise Rings.
I'll kick your ass back to the Shire
if you don't close your fucking mouth.
it looks very gay, I think Sam will tell
small hobbits to go
so he can walk with Frodo
and suck his cock.
well, that must be the ending worthy Academy award.
Hey, gay, they're not gay. They are hobbits.
And then after Sam-Frodo sucked at each other,
just before credit runs,
Sam ejaculated in Frodo's mouth.
I swear...
Damn you!
I'm making fun of Lord of the Rings is so hard,
which makes super weird people vomit to the entire table.
Where do we store mops and buckets
so that I can tell Elias to clean it?
In a closet with all the cleaning products.
Do we have cleaning products?
Why is there a strange smell here?
dagghh.
I'm watching you.
you know he won't succeed long here
when you're not here to protect it again, right?
Well, you're the one out there pushing him,
recommends ass licking.
I don't recommend that, shy.
I only say nothing once in a while.
Like you won't do it if Emma tells you.
God, no!
Oh, I think love knows no boundaries.
it came out of a woman's mouth, right?
snacks during the day, yes.
I'm sorry.
I don't know why I said that.
I really like Emma.
me too.
So that's why you're getting married!
I can't wait until you get engaged,
so that I can bother you as hard as you bother me.
You have to wait a long time, sir.
Oh, that's right. I forgot.
You're a cold-hearted princess
those who don't believe in marriage.
I'm not saying that is okay for you,
but, yes, I think
that marriage counteracts our fundamental nature.
To be loved?
To make as much love as possible...
spread the seeds and keep species alive.
And all the nonsense they gave us in the film
and only propaganda greeting cards
to get us married, have children and keep the economy going.
Marriage is only the keystone for the economy.
You're like a whiny girl.
Are you trying to tell me
You don't believe in love, Beckalah?
In romantic love,
no.
Like, I love my parents.
I love my car. I love you.
But romantic love, heart and flowers,
"There is only one person out there for me"?
Come on, do you know how much people are out there?
Most likely there will always be
someone who is better for you than the person you finally married.
So based on your theory,
there is someone out there better for me than Emma.
Oh, no, I won't talk about that.
Wait a minute.
do you think I don't really love him?
I think...
You like what he shows.
Which one?
Come on, Dante, he used to be the girl who refused
talk to you when you were in high school first.
And years later, after he made love to many men
and realize how unsatisfying is called "sexy woman",
he finally goes with someone who looks...
Oh, God,
You will say "is very bad," isn't it?
slebor!
Ah, a good denial.
Thank you.
it took several years
to finally find out about it
that every mother tries to teach their little girl
but he has to study alone,
and that's that guy that looks like you
there is a lot to offer, because you will always
try harder than handsome guy.
Am I, some kind of ugly, ugly person hiding here?
No, you catch... something like that.
And catch Emma, too.
Because not only is she beautiful, but...
he will make all your decisions for you.
Which is luck, because you're pretty terrible in making a decision.
So my last day is about you telling me
how bad, is my hesitant loser?
Come on, you work in Quick Stop
for, a decade,
and you've been here for almost a year,
and from day one on the second job,
what you say is just how do you want it
get out and start life.
And it doesn't stop until Emma walks through the door and,
like, "come to Florida with me,
" And I will make you happy,
and my father will give you work, and blah blah, "
that you really went and did something about it.
And I understand... that's...
he's your golden ticket , sob.
So...
how is that for you?
I'm just the girl who slept with ugly men, vacillating losers
in the kitchen when this place closes.
That's me.
That's something for lovers out there.
J-RAM Radio. Right in the middle of the day...
So, we will never talk about it, right?
What can be said?
Are you sorry?
you?
I'm sorry that it was done on the cooking table.
Yes, you regret it... You are not a person
the mayonnaise on your cock.
What do you want me to say?
We're drunk, you know?
This just kind of happened.
You're just lucky I'm not one of the monogamous worshipers like your girlfriend.
If not, maybe I'll try to make you stay in Jersey.
If anyone can do it, it must be you.
Bro, your girlfriend is here looking for you.
Yes.
Come on come out with me. I have a surprise for you.
Is that a surprise for me?
No.
Goodbye, horse...
Hey.
Oh.
So, um...
Are you looking for a good Transformers site?
You can get an avatar
where your picture morphed to look like a robot.
Come on, bro.
You know I just surf Transformers Site
where there are girls hanging around, so they know how cool I am.
So what are you doing?
Trying to secure the prize Mr Dante's departure.
Really?
Now, what about the w replica of Arwen's sword?
What?
Uh...
Because of that, like, wise and practical.
I'm thinking about something that's a little sexier.
Now, what's sexier than the elf princess sword?
sexual shows.
What is that?
Have you ever seen a girl give a blow job to a donkey?
Oh, no!
Shh!
God!
If you leak this, I will suck your brain.
can you shut up?
Yes.
God.
That's sex with animals, Randal.
this is the best, I hope.
Who wants to see something like that?
me, Dante, you.
I don't want to see something like that.
Why do you want to see something like that?
Because it's chaotic.
And I want to see
if a girl with a mouth full swallows a donkey's penis.
Alright, here it is.
"Kinky Kelly and the Sexy Stud.
"Right from their debut in Tijuana,
" Kelly is leading the way.
leads to the butt, that is. "
You have to respect Oscar Wilde for good play. Did they show photos?
Only one of Kinky Kelly sucked Optimus Prime.
Really?
Ow.
= = let me borrow your cellphone.
Whoa. because, I should only use it
to call my parents if emergency.
This is an emergency.
We have to order Kinky Kelly for tonight,
so we can give Mr. Dante a memento before leaving.
You love Mr. Dante, don't you?
not in the case of gay ways.
then give me your call.
Because Mr. Dante never saw a sexual event.
And it must be good to give this For him before he goes
to Florida and get married and do all things
which prevents a man from seeing
sexual shows in his life.
Hello.
Uh, I hope to schedule Kinky Kelly to appear.
Tonight.
OK.
I'm waiting.
hopefully (crossing fingers).
We may have to cross the penis, too.
No.
Work, work, work.
That's all you think about, Hicks.
Hey, Becks.
Hey, Emma.
a good shirt.
Really? I like it.
What I like more is this.
This comes fast,
and I have to go back and show it to Dante.
And give you, of course.
And I have one for Randal, I think.
What is this?
Listen, I know this three months,
but that will mean a lot to us if you can travel there.
Well... yes.
I won't miss it.
I think we'll wait until we get there before we set the date.
Oh, he is very funny.
He thinks again, huh?
If we give anything to this wolf,
nothing will ever be done, right?
I'm just teasing.
I think you should make a decision for em sometimes.
Okay, I understand.
see you later.
Thank you.
My friend, tonight,
we bring a little show to the suburbs of Jersey '.
Well, I don't know about this, Randal.
I mean, how do we know is not a trick?
Like, is there a picture on the website?
Strangely, nothing.
But if you've seen a photo of a girl sucking a donkey,
you've seen it all.
Now, what if you have never seen Poto
from something like that?
Well, then you must be blind like Anne Frank.
Because what is the point has an internet connection
if you don't use it to see strange messy images
from dirty sex you will never be proud of yourself?
damn it.
You know, I've never discussed this until now.
You're still a virgin, right?
You know I have a girlfriend, Randal.
Oh, yeah.
what's the name?
Myra Hodgkiss.
You're bragging, right?
That name sounds very artificial.
No.
Seriously, Elias, have you and Myra ever had sex?
Well, that's a personal thing, Randal.
Come on!
I told you about my sex life all the time.
I let you kiss my fingers after I screwed Sister Taton Weathers
in the office first, right?
You kind of made me kiss you on the fingers.
Maybe you just don't like pussy.
Maybe you like penises.
No, no, I like pussy.
So come on.
Has Myra ever given a gap in the gap or something?
Well, that's none of your business, Randal,
but he can't.
Why?
God, Elias, come on.
you have to start more trust me.
Because after Dante left,
You will be my new best friend.
No, I don't want to.
Who are the other people who will hang out with me?
This will be you and me, friend.
So come on.
you have to start more trust me.
Open it and tell me everything.
Like why haven't you slept with Myra?
Well, we can't because of Pillow Pants.
What is Pillow Pants?
Pillow Pants is a small troll who lives in her vagina.
Pillow Pants is her pussy troll.
Duh.
you know how are every girl's parents
put the vaginal troll inside it when the child is teenager
to guard them from premarital sex?
Sure.
Well, Myra named it Pillow Pants.
And, even though he really wanted to have sex with me,
Myra says if I put my in him,
Pillow Pants will bite off.
So I have to wait for to Pillow Pants
get out of his body on his 21st birthday
before we can have sex.
And Myra said this?
fellow girlfriends
talk about sex with each other, Randal.
You will know this if you ever have a boyfriend.
Did you and Myra not even kiss?
we must have done it already, if it wasn't for Lister Fiend.
Lister Fiend is a troll in his mouth, no?
Woman.
I'll be back soon.
You will never believe what Ellias just said.
See who it is, Randal.
Randal Graves.
do you work here too?
God. is there someone else from our class behind there?
well...
Pickle Fucker.
Bro, look at you two funny workers.
Nothing has changed.
You know, I'll bet dollars with donuts,
when you two don't fight
about who shot first, Han or Greedo,
you can still get enough energy
from making fun of other people.
Yes. So hurry up and order and get out of here,
so we can make fun of you.
Oh, I don't know if you're in position
making fun of someone else, Graves.
age 32 and you turned the burger?
Before that, I heard that Quick Stop
what, like, has it been ten years?
We all cannot become millionaires of the Internet.
Who is an internet millionaire?
Elias, this is Lance Dowds.
We're one high school.
A few years ago,
he built a search engine that compiled the lowest price
merchandise that can you buy online.
You might have heard about it...
Isn't that just sold on Amazon for around 20 million dollars?
Yeah, but first
before he was Mad Ducketts, he was just Pickle Fucker.
hear, in the first year,
the seniors will hunt us down and put us somewhere
they call hazing.
They put us in a locker
or put us in a woman's bathroom _ naked.
But this Lance gets the worst.
The seniors jerked down the pants,
and push the pickles to his ass,
and make it walk ten meters.
The result falls before it reaches ten feet.
He must take it by biting it, pair it back and walk again.
Ew...
Yes, but don't worry... it works.
The show is quite small to stay stuck after only four bites.
I'll bet you're the only person in the world who still remembers that, Graves.
Oh, I'm sure you still remember it's pretty clear...
Pickle Fucker.
Are you interested? build the main site of fans
for The Lord of the Rings and The Transformers?
Because I built it for free.
Relax, Pillow Pants.
He doesn't like nonsense D & D and your GoBots.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Don't insult people.
The GoBots are like self-service Transformers.
Thank you!
I always say that to them.
Here, this is my e-mail address.
spend your time with me with some of your ideas.
cool.
Okay, let's see.
What do I want?
what about Skinny Calf with cheese and Diet Coke?
I will get your order.
here it is.
Well, it's fast.
And fresh.
Thank you. Come again.
Yo, let's finish this so that I can get my Cow Tipper.
Do you want to know?
take mine.
Something tells me I won't like it, right?
Wow, thank you, Pickle Fucker.
Yo, so Pickle Fucker gives us free food!
You know, I don't eat fast food.
This is not good for you.
But when I hear you really works here,
Well, I just want to see with my own eyes.
It's kind of fun has some kind of free time.
Just like entertaining to know
that some things never change.
see you, shop clerk.
burns sick.
Fuck this.
let me borrow your car.
You should work.
I have to get out of here for a few minutes.
Let me borrow your car.
Elias, tell Becky we will be back soon.
Where do we go?
You know, this feels like urinating and flies, right?
Are you sure you want to do this?
Oh, yeah.
This will make me feel better.
Here's what I don't understand about you.
you have a sim, you can drive an adult car.
But when you ride the go-carts,
somehow you feel better with yourself.
hear, it's just centered on me, ok?
you kind of masturbates at work is centered on you.
I only did it once.
And it's not towards the center of me.
Yes, it happened.
Well, I don't know about you, but I've come to my center.
Then why do we have to leave work,
so we can ride the go-carts to clear your brain?
Well, I don't want to masturbate in the Mooby bathroom.
What if the customer comes
and my masturbation made it so crazy sex and very idiot?
Suddenly, I'm fighting against it
when he tried to swallow my cock in his mouth.
that's the most likely scenario.
Bro, Lance's words must have really bothered you.
Oh, fuck him.
She's a ***. It is always like that.
I'm sorry to let him bother me even for a moment.
At least I've played go-cart to release it.
Why can go-carts help?
I don't know.
They only remind me of the best time of my life.
Like when?
Like when we are young and the world is still in front of us.
We are not that old.
Yes.
But sometimes I feel the world has long left us.
You know...
You can do something about it.
I told you, I don't want to masturbate in the bathroom at work.
No, I mean you can also get out of Mooby,
really changes your situation in life.
What's the point? Besides that, why do you care?
You will leave.
Thank you, you guys, thank you.
Come on!
Oh, I'm sorry.
Is number two what you want ?
Yes, and that size cow.
$ 13.84.
I need two Surlies and Cow Tipper.
I'm working on it.
How do you make french fries?
I don't think this seems right.
God! away from the frying pan before you burn us all alive.
This is not my fault You left your place!
Is it too hard to ask you to handle french fries?
Machines that do all work.
What engine must change become a fucking giant robot before you will take it seriously?
Go home.
Will you make ready for french fries?
Listen, I don't have time all night.
I'm sorry, ma'am.
They need to find some people Mexico to work here.
it must be...
They don't play games.
I know that. Mexican people made me lose my job.
The bastard worked on the roof in 30 seconds.
Where have you gone?
You don't want to know.
Well, I know this is your last day and everything,
but when you're still at work,
can't you pretend still kind of cares?
Don't blame him.
the one who loves the school with us
appears to remind us that we are people who failed,
so I want to get out of here
and relieve anger, if you want to know.
Did he say "sperm stain"?
What is the cock stain?
I don't know... that's some strange things about white people.
white men told white women ' to do everything.
Do you want to do the cock stain?
Do you know how often the people who come here is one school with me?
Fuck, I have to take an order from a man who has
I'm a blowjob during a middle school dance.
Yeah, I also waited for your brother ...!
I don't believe you the smartest of the smartest confused
because of some damn loser come here
gives you incitement about your work.
fuck him, okay?
Sooner or later, I'll do something with myself and make my achievement.
But until then, whatever I do is not a waste of time,
it all builds towards something.
What about you building towards making fries?
almost ready!
Remember, you survived.
don't use languages like that.
none of my church members is here.
I don't mind people laughing
in a stupid uniform that I have to wear.
But I'm damned if I leave
people are narcissistic sox, lucky bastard come here
and treat me and Dante
Like us, couples are lazy people.
Randal!
Uh, I'm sorry. He...
He didn't really say what I thought he said.
- What? Terrace Monkey (Idler)? - Randal!
What's wrong with you ?!
I want my money back now.
Of course. Do you know?
this, take this for free.
no.
I don't eat anything that
cooked by sellers who hate racism.
I want to.
Honey, you can't feel racism.
What is racism? Porch monkeys ?!
- you squirrel... - Calm down, champ.
this is not feasible.
you're lucky my husband isn't
jump over this counter and break your teeth
- Why? - Yes, honey, why?
I mean, it's not like he calls us Porch monkeys.
Hey, hey!
dear, stop hitting me!
hear, the judge said about that.
You have to stop beating people.
this, take this. This is your money.
Please, take the food for free.
- Sorry. - Oh, uh-uh.
I will write to the newspaper about this,
and all of you will get fired here.
God!
I'll get the food.
Thank you very much.
Damn it!
damn porch monkey...
Thank you. Come again.
Don't leave me, baby!
Have you gone crazy ?!
What ?! What is the problem?
Since when did "porch monkey" be a crime?
Oh, I don't know... since forever!
- Why? - Because "porch monkey"
is racial slurs against black people.
No, the "Negro" is racist slurs.
Randal!
Is Randal just calling Mr Dante a Negro?
Shut up, Elias!
I didn't call Dante Negro.
I'm just saying that "negro" is racial slurs.
so does "porch monkey"!
Oh, no.
Coon, spook, spade, moolie, jiggaboo, nignug...
that is racial humiliation.
"Porch Monkey" no.
I will pretend like this conversation
never happened.
Elias, go clean up the garbage,
and you are this close with dismissal!
God, shoot me now.
What are you doing ?!
Are you trying to get fired?
Since when did "porch monkey" suddenly become racial slurs?
When ignorant racists start saying that 100 years ago.
Oh, bullshit.
My grandmother used to call me porch monkey all the time
when I was little, because I sat on the terrace and look at my neighbor.
Despite the fact
that your grandmother might have used it
as the term from your affection for you,
it's still racial slurs.
This will be like your grandmother calling you a small Jew.
Oh, no.
Plus, my grandmother is just
respect for the Jewish community.
When I was little, he told me to always treat
Jewish children well, or they will curse you (sheeny curse).
What's this, man ?!
What ?!
"Sheeny" is racial slurs, too!
Oh, no.
Yes!
Well, he never called sheeny to Jews.
He only very often says "sheeny curse".
That's funny.
That's not funny! That's racist!
I don't agree, bro.
She's just an old man.
That's how people talk at that time.
It doesn't mean they are racist.
But my grandmother once referred to a broken beer bottle
as a negro knife.
You know, if you think about it,
My grandmother is a bit racist.
Do you think ?!
Well, I still don't think
"porch monkey" must be considered as a racial term.
I mean, I always use it to describe lazy people,
not lazy black people.
I think if we really try,
we can reclaim the words "porch monkey" and save them.
it can't be saved, Randal.
The only purpose to be created,
the only reason was the first time,
is to underestimate the whole race.
And even if it can be saved,
You can't save it, because you're not black!
Well, you said it.
Saying that I can't do something because of my skin color?
You're a racist.
I take it back. We will see.
Hey.
What can I get for you, are you a little terrace monkey?
it's okay. I take it back.
Hey.
So, aren't you afraid of with marriage?
Um...
we were in the middle of a conversation
I don't remember leaving?
I only think about it, and I think maybe you are waiting for some of your friends
trying to stop you
with marriage
by asking if you've even been ready to go and get married.
So I asked.
Are you afraid of marriage?
Well, something like that.
I mean, I'm not afraid married, you know...
I always want to get married someday...
but I'm afraid of marriage.
Why?
I don't know how to dance.
You're kidding me.
I hope.
You will tie your life with someone,
someone who doesn't even help you as good as your friends do,
and what you fear is dancing at your wedding reception?
Well, I think finally he will help me.
I mean, you've been around for a long time married someone,
they have to help you finally, right?
Are you kidding me?
My parents have been married for 35 years,
and they still don't help each other.
Emma is beautiful, is smart, happy, a good person...
and for some strange reason, he loves me.
I mean, what should I do,
missed that because I have
A doubt and stupid anxiety?
Besides that, dance at the reception become more important attention at this time,
because I only get,
well, maybe one chance to dance in my wedding.
So, what, you can't slow dance?
no, Anyone can slow dance,
but this is the time I will meet
most of Emma's family,
and I want to be able to display some talents
on the dance floor, you know?
Like, make an impression so maybe they will see
whatever it was that Emma saw in me
instead of all feeling like I'm a loser burger vendor who can't even dance.
What?
Are you serious?
Come on.
Hey, 12 steps!
Jay!
God?
up here, stupid.
What did you do up there ?!
Yo, if you want to jump,
let me get the gap in the vagina for the first time.
Let me find out.
Do you still have your music player?
play something, and cheerful rhythm.
Something that can be invited to shake.
above here?
Are you serious?
Will you teach me dance here?
What? do you want me to do it in front of all customers?
what customer?
Shut up. Come here.
Okay, get ready for music.
you feel it... here.
This is it.
Something not too demonic, please!
Thank you.
Yes! Okay, just follow it
whatever I do, okay?
- Step forward... - Alright.
stepping back.
To your right.
to your left.
Turn right.
Sit down...
Okay, you're really bad. Sit down.
I told you.
Just look at me, okay?
I love you, Becky.
I'm pregnant, Dante.
Oh!
I've been thinking twice.
About your sexuality?
About going to Florida.
Yes, right.
Why now, suddenly?
Becky is pregnant.
really?
Huh.
So, what, are you afraid will go through the bathing event?
I'm my father.
This sucks, bro.
I have a very severe prostate,
be calm.
Ew, man, don't try to see my cock.
What is this? What?
Should we leave them there?
Oh, leave them! How can you father of children
with the woman who is not your fiance ?!
God!
She's pregnant from the toilet seat
your masturbates!
I know that!
No, we had sex after work, a few weeks ago.
What ?! Where?!
Here at the kitchen table.
Ew! That's my kitchen table.
I don't know what to do.
What did Beck say?
He said he wanted to have it.
Oh, God, so he wants you break up - With Emma and marrying her? - no
Will he tell Emma?
No!
Wait a minute... then what's the problem?
- Are you that stupid? - I'm serious.
If Becks doesn't force you about it,
what's the problem?
You can still go to Florida
and live happily ever after.
Knowing I have a beloved child in Jersey ?!
How do you always have it,
two beautiful girls who want you?
You're the most stupid person
I've met, and you always have
a pair of girls fighting over you.
Listen, you can't tell anyone about this.
Who will I tell?
I'm serious, Randal! And not only for me.
Becky says she doesn't want anyone to know.
Then what are you saying to me?
hear, you've messed me up in the past,
but this is very big.
This is serious!
Promise me that you will shut up,
because if you screw me up this time,
I swear to God, I will destroy you.
what are you and the army?
I'm serious!
I'm serious too. What are you and the army?
Promise me!
Alright! Let me go, crazy!
What's the matter ?!
Can I talk to you for a minute?
Oh, yes, of course. Eh, we are just...
Have your first child become a masculine child.
Becky!
Randal!
He makes me sweat. It just came out.
Ow! Shit!
you punched me!
- You look down! - Because you punched me!
Damn it!
Where is Becky?
He just left.
I need help here, Mr. Dante.
I can't wrap properly, and Randal have eaten the last pickle.
You really are a complainant.
I'm sorry, Randal. Forgive me.
Becky!
Maybe he went to take a home pregnancy test
just to be sure.
How can today be even worse?
Now, what are you doing, bro?
Follow him!
do you think?
You're very right, I'll do it.
You two must complete this.
Follow him, talk to for him for an hour,
then come back here.
One hour ?!
I know that every hour is more than that,
You're at risk of saying the wrong thing again.
Follow him, talk to him for an hour,
then come back here and help me close this.
You can't close yourself?
of course, friend, you will be a father!
It's time to start taking responsibility!
back here in one hour. leave!
Hello.
I assume you're with Kinky Kelly.
Good guess. are you Randal?
yes
How long is your time to arrange it?
Must connect to the speaker,
hang some curtains and some lights.
I have a small smoke machine for atmosphere. Yes.
Well, you might immediately start setting up.
We start another hour before the guest of honor returns.
So, can I meet Kelly before the event or something?
Well.
Kelly needs privacy before the show time.
But after the program, if you want,
for an additional $ 500, you can kiss Kelly.
Really? Sweet.
Yes. So, where do we do this?
Oh, right inside the restaurant.
You're kidding me.
Not wide enough?
No, it's very broad.
It's just a little weird, right?
A little strange?
you play business sexuality with animals, bro.
Hey, damn...
... We like to call it
inter-erotica species.
Interesting.
Oh, no.
not again.
Yes, there is a fire in Mooby
at the Memorial Parkway and Leonardo.
What?
What really happened?
This is your farewell party.
Whoo! Whoo!
We will all get drunk and make love!
Oh, God, is Elias drunk?
Isn't that awesome?
this friend sucked two rolls full of marijuana.
Fuck Pillow Pants!
sound the horn if you like virgins...
Yo, we like pussy.
Tonight, before you left me forever,
we will see something we've talked about
since we saw "bachelor party"
in your parents' brotherhood house, when we were 12 years old.
What are you talking about?
I'll miss you, bro.
I will miss you too, but this is a bit excessive
Yes? Just wait.
it's time for the show!
attendees...
and you, Elias,
directly from the capital
world debauchery, Tijuana, Mexico...
Oh, God, no.
Oh, God, yeah.
get ready for animalistic sexuality.
Inter-species erotica, fucko!
The best inter-species of erotica,
directly from TJ,
I gave you Kinky Kelly and The Sexy Stud!
Don't worry. The girl is coming.
a few more seconds, the girl is coming.
Soon.
Wow, that person is so going forward with that donkey.
Eh, Randal ?!
Where is the girl?
Yo, Freddie Mercury damn, where is Kelly?
here.
I think it's sexy stud.
I'm the sexi Stud
But this donkey is a man.
Kelly can also be . The name of a man. Hey!
Because of naming errors,
there won't be any girls.
Now, who will send the donkey to hell?
I'm very tense now.
Oh, God!
Becky!
where have you gone?
What really happened here?
inter-erotica species.
Are you okay?
I'm sick and disgusted and...
and I can't look away.
That's very big!
We have to talk.
Do you see the size of the penis...
I love you.
And I think you love me too.
Uh, of course. me...
I mean, we are friends.
I think you love me is more than just a friend.
It's okay. You can say that.
But I don't believe it romantic love.
I think you believe.
Do you really want to do this now?
Well, I think the show is over.
I don't think so, sir.
If he wants to masturbate,
I'll masturbate too.
I don't think he will masturbate.
Yo, you will miss this!
the fat guy will spice up the donkey with her!
Hold that thought.
stay where you are...
I hope the donkey doesn't have the troll pussy.
Alright, me too.
what?
I love you too.
what kind of bastard is turned on
see a man peppering a donkey?
I'm sorry, Jesus.
Dante?
What happened?
Ooh, cake.
Yo, I'm outside urinating when I hear the news.
congratulations!
You will have a baby, right?
no, who said?
jerk.
I'm sorry.
your bastard!
Hurry, two times with this!
Hey, do you want to date sometime?
Emma, I'm not... I don't know what to say.
grab him, damn bitch.
Emma!
Oh, no.
Oh, shit, no more. I have to finish.
Yo, the police are outside, we hold the goods,
and I'm still on probation.
What is this?
Porch monkey ?!
Oh, no, it's okay.
I take it back.
I like pussy and beer!
Whoo-hoo!
Deja vu, right?
The design of the prison cell hasn't changed for centuries, right?
Maybe it's time they made it from the laser or whatever.
Or they can make it
hard plastic enclosures like Magneto in X-Men 2.
No, come on, bro,
Let's stay in the real world, ok?
But you know what won't be a bad idea?
CARBONITE.
What do you think, Dante?
I think I'll kill you!
Let me go!
what's wrong ?! iron cage fight!
You ruined my life!
Your life is ruined!
God!
What are you thinking?
damn sexual shows ?!
That's your parting gift!
of course it was.
I never thought, it made us go to jail.
Hey, kid.
you can't be convicted
for watching sex acts between species.
you will be free.
I'm the most fined for violating animals and a very disgusting view of a moronic conservative
who can't appreciate sexual exploration.
Hey!
I miss my donkey.
I don't believe you.
finally I can organize myself.
I'm going to get out of here and really started my life, and you somehow looked for a way
to destroy all that and drop me as a convict.
Oh, yeah, it's my fault Your life is messed up.
I'm an engaged guy who impregnated his boss.
Did you impregnate a man who owns Mooby?
What?
will you shut up?
You're the incarnation of chaos, bro.
our entire life,
You have given me a problem and stopped me.
Oh, I'm holding you back, right?
I remember, like, 10 years ago,
when we go to Julie Dwyer's funeral,
you're like, "I want to follow up on our intentions"
You said, "follow up our intentions," not me.
you're too excited about taking over your life,
and what are you doing?
You work at the shop until the place is on fire.
I took a course at Brookdale.
And come out.
Because you will stop.
Because we only spend time with people in that class.
One semester,
we major in Criminology, by God.
what were we trained to be, Batman?
At least we did something rather than wasting our lives in the damn shop!
Do you want to know?
You can insult Quick Stop as you like, but I miss that place.
I like working there.
I looked back at that period as the best time of my life.
Now I know you're crazy.
Why? Because I enjoy what I do?
I can watch movies,
cursing asshole, and hanging out with my best friend
all day.
Can you think of a better way to make a living?
Yes, maybe that's not what people used to do,
but that's good enough.
Bro, it's all over.
eroded with minimal.
Well, I'm tired of that, Randal.
I'm not a high school kid anymore.
Damn, I'm not even in my twenties anymore.
I don't want to sit alone and comment on customers while eating free food.
That's what you want to do.
That's what you always want to do.
Now, if that's the only life you want, then God bless,
but I refuse to let your ugliness tarnish the rest of my life.
I'm not going to make up with Emma,
go to Florida
and start without Randal Graves.
And tried to forget about 33 years ago that happened.
So that's how you saw the first time we spent together?
That's weird, man.
I think you're the only man in the world who helps and protects me...
the only person who will hit the bullet for me,
Because I assume you feel me
like I feel the same with you.
Then, suddenly, one day, you're like, "I'll move. Daghh."
Do you know what that means to me?
I see the future which one sucks,
because you won't be there in it anymore.
And you didn't even throw me
meaningful life for you.
This is stupid, there is nothingness I think you should embrace because you will be old or whatever,
because this is the type of life that other people will experience.
You're a fucking slacker, bro.
Good.
then the next friend whose life you are damaged
can be a free soul.
How about that?
Do you think I want to start looking for friends at my age?
God.
Who wants me be their friend?
I hate everyone, and everything that looks stupid to me...
... But you've always been the balancer...
the man who has yin for me.
But now what should I do for the rest of my life?
I mean, damn, I really hope
You already said this when I first met you
that one day, you will save our friendship,
because if I knew you would only leave me
decades later...
I won't bother with your problem first time.
God, why can't you two
just making love and finishing it?
gay.
Why can't you say something that is useful for change?
Now, what are you waiting for?
That's your signal, bro.
I have nothing to say.
God, what's your use,
damn quiet ?!
You know, that hurts.
Like, what have you ever added to the trial process?
You're just like having one answer for everything: "Pussy, man." (vagina, sob)
Oh, then, you must love this man,
Because he is the biggest coward (vagina) I've ever met.
the man who lived his life
according to other people's standards.
"I have to go to Florida
and get married, because that's what is expected of me."
And it's crazy, he isn't even crazy about it with the girl he is going to marry or Florida,
forget the fact that he has
very good girl
here in Jersey who is crazy about
and even damn Anne Frank can see her crazy about him.
only God knows.
And he likes you for who he is, bro.
He doesn't try to arrange you into a box
that will never fit you.
Not to mention the fact that he brought
a stupid kid you are terrible.
God, if you have any sense,
You better stop trying
complaining with the rest of your mess and live your life in a way that makes sense to you,
stupid!
Oh, huh? And what is that?
you obviously have a kind of big grip
in your life.
Tell me what you will do if you are in my position...
or even what will you do in your own position?
The judgmental pendulum swing returns to one side
and tell me how you will solve all your problems, jerk.
What will be done the great Randal Graves
if he controls half from his destiny
which one should I be ?!
I will buy a Quick Stop and reopen it myself!
That's what I will do.
That's what we have to do.
Yes, right.
Who are we, Lance Dowds?
Do you know how much it costs
to buy Quick Stop?
Like, 50 thousand dollars, it's easy.
And none of us has that kind of money.
We have.
That's right.
You are willing to lend us the money so we can reopen the store?
Of course, with two conditions.
One: We can hang out in front of the shop
whenever we want, and you can't call the police.
And two:
you have to blow each other's jobs,
and we may watch it.
then you do anal lick.
All right, only the first condition.
Seriously?
Am I stuttering?
Yes, seriously.
What do you think?
I almost hate to say it, but...
that makes some sense.
Hey, maybe that's why we spend so much time in that shop,
why college
or whatever it has never been successful for us.
I mean, think about that, bro.
You and I run our own business instead of working for some other bastard?
It could be pretty sweet, right?
Yes, that really can.
But I don't know.
I've been this close to start a new life.
God.
You really will make me do it, right?
Can you close your ears for a while, please?
You're my best friend...
and I love you.
By the way of normal people.
Yes, right.
Please, bro, don't leave me.
Thank you.
That becomes $ 5.79.
I mean, you've taught me how to dance at a wedding.
I mean... I know you don't believe in romantic love.
Does that mean huh?
What made you take so long?
"One ring to master everything."
Come on!
Oh!
Thank you. Okay.
a pack of cigarettes?
You know. What?
You're not even supposed to be here today.
Can you feel it?
What do you feel?
Today is the first day of the rest of our lives.