1
00:00:34,040 --> 00:00:36,088
[hip hop music]

2
00:01:15,560 --> 00:01:17,289
[man] Listen up, pledges!

3
00:01:17,360 --> 00:01:21,046
This frat's Halloween parties
have always been epic.

4
00:01:21,120 --> 00:01:22,360
[men] Epic!

5
00:01:22,440 --> 00:01:24,681
And this year will be no exception.

6
00:01:24,760 --> 00:01:27,206
My reputation is on the line.

7
00:01:27,280 --> 00:01:30,602
So if I fail, you all fail.

8
00:01:30,680 --> 00:01:33,206
And we all know that Jonathan
doesn't fail, right?

9
00:01:33,320 --> 00:01:34,401
- [all] Right!
- Got it?

10
00:01:34,480 --> 00:01:35,606
[man] Got it.

11
00:01:35,680 --> 00:01:39,207
You see? Now this is why I know
that tonight's gonna be epic, fellas.

12
00:01:39,280 --> 00:01:41,567
- [snoring]
- Would somebody wake him up?

13
00:01:41,640 --> 00:01:44,041
- [man 1] Horse, hey.
- [man 2] Wake up!

14
00:01:44,120 --> 00:01:46,361
The Horse is always up, man.

15
00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:49,284
Bean Boy.
Tell your president what today is.

16
00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:51,044
It's Halloween time, sir!

17
00:01:51,120 --> 00:01:55,921
And why is Halloween so important
to this frat's reputation, Bean?

18
00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:58,321
Oh, I don't know.
Maybe we have the longest tradition

19
00:01:58,400 --> 00:02:00,323
of throwing the best
Halloween parties ever, sir.

20
00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:03,006
- [people cheer]
- And what will be your contribution be

21
00:02:03,080 --> 00:02:06,971
to make sure that tonight
is the best party ever?

22
00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:10,283
I've been recruiting
some of the best talent on campus.

23
00:02:10,400 --> 00:02:12,050
This is pledgee Cummings.

24
00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:15,442
Studies film makeup, sir.
Best in my class.

25
00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:17,045
How's it going, man... Sir?

26
00:02:17,120 --> 00:02:19,851
And I found this guy.
Pledgee Mond...

27
00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:23,290
Mondon!
Mondon! Oh.

28
00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:25,089
This is pledge Mondon, everyone.

29
00:02:25,160 --> 00:02:27,367
- Whoa.
- Weird name, cool guy.

30
00:02:27,440 --> 00:02:30,410
This guy can hack into anything.
I mean, anything.

31
00:02:30,480 --> 00:02:31,856
- [man] Nice.
- K? Remember last year?

32
00:02:31,880 --> 00:02:33,450
When he hacked into the Beta Sorority?

33
00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:35,204
- Yes! Yes!
- Into the webcams?

34
00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:36,376
- [people cheering]
- I remember that.

35
00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:37,526
- I remember that.
- Yeah!

36
00:02:37,600 --> 00:02:41,525
Very illegal, kind of creepy.
But very fun, nonetheless.

37
00:02:41,640 --> 00:02:43,404
Dude, can we do that again?
I was so happy.

38
00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:46,324
Breathe. Take a breath.
That's why I got him.

39
00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:49,762
And, sir, this is pledgee
Wells and Dimps,

40
00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:51,251
and they are very special.

41
00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:53,084
Pledgees, show them.

42
00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:54,730
- [man] All right!
- [crowd cheering]

43
00:02:55,480 --> 00:02:57,562
[hip hop music]

44
00:02:59,120 --> 00:03:00,246
[all exclaim]

45
00:03:06,880 --> 00:03:08,564
[all exclaim]

46
00:03:10,760 --> 00:03:12,444
[Horse]
Ladies alert! Ladies alert!

47
00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:14,680
- Oh, that's them. That's them.
- [Horse] Ladies alert!

48
00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:18,409
These are college guys.

49
00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:20,721
[boys howling]

50
00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:22,211
- Ladies!
- [Leah] What up, boys?

51
00:03:22,280 --> 00:03:23,770
- Damn.
- Hi.

52
00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:26,127
Hey. I'm Renaldo,
but my friends call me Horse

53
00:03:26,200 --> 00:03:28,806
[boys chuckling]

54
00:03:28,880 --> 00:03:31,247
- I'm Rain, and this is my friend.
- Leah.

55
00:03:31,320 --> 00:03:32,810
I'm Tiffany.

56
00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:34,723
- My name's Aday.
- I'm Jonathan,

57
00:03:34,800 --> 00:03:36,768
the <i>El</i> Presidente
of this here fraterni-tay.

58
00:03:36,840 --> 00:03:38,410
- [boys cheer]
- [laughs]

59
00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:40,726
Well, what's up with you ladies?

60
00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:43,531
You are now staring
at Upsilon Theta's finest.

61
00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:45,925
[all hiss]

62
00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:48,762
- [chuckles]
- You girls go to school here?

63
00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:50,365
- No. No.
- No.

64
00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:53,171
- No, we go to St. Mary's.
- Oh, that's what's up.

65
00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:55,527
St. Mary's, that's
an all-girl college, right?

66
00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:58,809
So y'all probably never seen
a dude before in real life.

67
00:03:58,880 --> 00:04:02,407
This right here,
this is what a dude looks like.

68
00:04:02,480 --> 00:04:05,165
[Jonathan] All right, look.
We're having a Halloween party tonight,

69
00:04:05,240 --> 00:04:07,322
- and it's gonna be...
- [all] Epic!

70
00:04:07,400 --> 00:04:08,970
- Oh, well...
- Epic.

71
00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:11,687
Um...

72
00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:13,647
Concussion.

73
00:04:15,160 --> 00:04:16,496
[Jonathan] So why don't
you ladies come on by

74
00:04:16,520 --> 00:04:18,170
and be Jonathan's special guest?

75
00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:19,480
What time?

76
00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:21,920
[Jonathan] The party starts at 10:00,
so come when you like.

77
00:04:21,960 --> 00:04:24,088
- Oh, I don't know about...
- We'll see you tonight.

78
00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:26,280
[Jonathan] Give me your phone.
I'll put my number in.

79
00:04:27,520 --> 00:04:29,966
Tiffany, there's your dad.

80
00:04:33,760 --> 00:04:36,445
Chill out. Chill.

81
00:04:36,520 --> 00:04:38,363
- Rain, Leah, Aday...
- Hi.

82
00:04:38,440 --> 00:04:40,488
- Hi, Mr. Simmons.
- So hot.

83
00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:42,642
Daddy issues.

84
00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:44,489
[Brian]
Tiffany, what's going on?

85
00:04:44,560 --> 00:04:46,085
Hey, Old Man River,

86
00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:48,640
ain't you got some pigeons
to feed or something? Take a hike.

87
00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:50,131
[Brian]
I'm sorry. Old Man River?

88
00:04:50,200 --> 00:04:51,416
Who you talking to, son?
Who you talking to?

89
00:04:51,440 --> 00:04:52,726
Do you see your grandpa here?

90
00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:54,529
Have you looked in the mirror, son?

91
00:04:54,600 --> 00:04:56,682
You're in college
and you look like you're 67, okay?

92
00:04:56,760 --> 00:04:58,489
- Bring it. You bring it.
- Dino...

93
00:04:58,560 --> 00:05:00,881
- I want you to bring it so badly.
- Dino.

94
00:05:00,960 --> 00:05:02,496
I will whoop your ass.
You understand that?

95
00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:03,726
I will whoop your <i>ass.</i>

96
00:05:03,800 --> 00:05:07,441
Dad, he's pretty big.
He is the star lineman on the team.

97
00:05:07,520 --> 00:05:08,726
Pfft! Look at me.

98
00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:10,564
- [stuttering] I play...
- Tennis.

99
00:05:10,640 --> 00:05:13,530
In high school, 30 years ago.

100
00:05:13,600 --> 00:05:15,204
Chill out, pops. It's cool.

101
00:05:15,280 --> 00:05:17,408
[Brian] Who are you? Thor?
Did Thor just...

102
00:05:17,480 --> 00:05:19,562
What the hell are you telling me,
"Chill out, pops"?

103
00:05:19,640 --> 00:05:22,564
You don't tell me to chill out, okay?
That's my daughter, son.

104
00:05:22,640 --> 00:05:23,936
- Son, Fabio, whatever.
- [boys chuckle]

105
00:05:23,960 --> 00:05:25,564
Nobody's talking to you.

106
00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:28,166
Go somewhere, grow your hair
and stay out of this, okay?

107
00:05:28,240 --> 00:05:29,560
Sir, I'll take
care of them, okay?

108
00:05:29,640 --> 00:05:30,846
Back to the frat house.

109
00:05:30,920 --> 00:05:33,571
You see? [scoffs]

110
00:05:33,640 --> 00:05:36,530
It won't happen again, sir.
I'm so sorry. Bye, girls.

111
00:05:36,600 --> 00:05:38,376
[Brian] Tiffany,
how many times have I told you

112
00:05:38,400 --> 00:05:39,845
not to walk past this frat house?

113
00:05:39,920 --> 00:05:41,456
Well, we were just
walking by, Mr. Simmons,

114
00:05:41,480 --> 00:05:42,845
and they stopped us.

115
00:05:42,920 --> 00:05:44,256
- It's not our fault.
- We didn't do anything.

116
00:05:44,280 --> 00:05:45,536
You're coming home.
Get in the car.

117
00:05:45,560 --> 00:05:46,846
No. No, no, no, no, guys.

118
00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:48,763
There's no room in there
for all of us.

119
00:05:48,840 --> 00:05:50,696
The house is right there.
We're just gonna walk.

120
00:05:50,720 --> 00:05:52,370
Tiffany, get in the car.

121
00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:55,284
It's right there. We can walk.
Come on. Come on.

122
00:05:55,600 --> 00:05:56,601
Come on.

123
00:05:56,680 --> 00:05:58,011
- Bye, Mr. Simmons.
- Bye!

124
00:05:58,080 --> 00:05:59,605
He seems angry.

125
00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:01,648
She never listens to you.

126
00:06:03,360 --> 00:06:06,603
So you know my mom used to
teach theater in school, right?

127
00:06:06,720 --> 00:06:08,736
So I have all these
really cool costumes in the attic.

128
00:06:08,760 --> 00:06:11,684
We're gonna come up with something
so hot for the party tonight.

129
00:06:11,760 --> 00:06:13,649
- Hot?
- Do you know your dad?

130
00:06:13,720 --> 00:06:15,245
He's not gonna let you go.

131
00:06:15,320 --> 00:06:17,402
Just let me deal with that, okay?

132
00:06:17,520 --> 00:06:19,936
Just meet me here at 10:00
and we can figure it out from there.

133
00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:22,486
- Okay.
- I don't know.

134
00:06:22,560 --> 00:06:24,324
She's coming. You're coming.

135
00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:25,606
I am so excited.

136
00:06:25,680 --> 00:06:27,011
I know, this is gonna be so wild.

137
00:06:27,080 --> 00:06:28,445
[shrieks]

138
00:06:29,720 --> 00:06:31,643
- Bye, girls!
- Bye!

139
00:06:31,720 --> 00:06:33,563
Oh, Lord.
I don't know about this.

140
00:06:33,640 --> 00:06:35,244
You're coming. Come on.

141
00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:37,322
We gotta figure out
what we're gonna wear.

142
00:06:37,400 --> 00:06:39,402
- Ohh!
- Gonna be so fun!

143
00:06:42,320 --> 00:06:45,051
[whispering] There's gonna be
boys there. I don't like that.

144
00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:47,930
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Not so fast. Not so fast.

145
00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:50,321
Listen to me.
How many times do I have to tell you?

146
00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:52,562
Do not walk past that frat house.

147
00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:54,016
You're out there,
you're talking to those guys.

148
00:06:54,040 --> 00:06:55,280
They are college kids.

149
00:06:55,360 --> 00:06:57,656
You're 17 years old, you're not
supposed to be talking to them.

150
00:06:57,680 --> 00:07:01,241
Do you understand me?
And what do you have on? What is this?

151
00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:03,448
Tiffany, I'm gonna tell you
one more time.

152
00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:05,966
Do not take your uniform off

153
00:07:06,040 --> 00:07:09,328
until you get into this house.
Are we clear?

154
00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:11,368
Leah and Rain's mom lets them do it.

155
00:07:11,440 --> 00:07:13,408
I am not Leah or Rain's parent.

156
00:07:13,480 --> 00:07:15,005
I am your parent.
Do you understand?

157
00:07:15,120 --> 00:07:17,361
And what I tell you,
you have to learn to listen to.

158
00:07:17,440 --> 00:07:18,566
I don't want you to do it.

159
00:07:18,640 --> 00:07:20,483
Okay, then buy me a car

160
00:07:20,560 --> 00:07:22,176
so I won't have to
walk past the frat house.

161
00:07:22,200 --> 00:07:23,896
Do you hear yourself?
I'm not buying you a car.

162
00:07:23,920 --> 00:07:26,366
That makes no sense to me.
I'm not buying you a car.

163
00:07:26,440 --> 00:07:29,284
- You have to finish school...
- Finish school. I... Yeah...

164
00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:31,016
- Do not mock me.
- [mockingly] Do not mock me.

165
00:07:31,040 --> 00:07:33,008
- Tiffany! Stop!
- [mockingly] Tiffany! Stop!

166
00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:34,525
Stop... You...
[continues mocking]

167
00:07:34,640 --> 00:07:36,130
Then stop talking.

168
00:07:37,400 --> 00:07:40,370
I'm an adult, I can say
what I wanna say in this house.

169
00:07:40,480 --> 00:07:41,766
Do you understand?

170
00:07:41,840 --> 00:07:43,256
[stuttering]
I can say what I wanna say

171
00:07:43,280 --> 00:07:44,776
and what I'm telling you
right now is this.

172
00:07:44,800 --> 00:07:46,564
You have to watch out
for those college kids.

173
00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:47,880
Those boys want one thing...

174
00:07:47,960 --> 00:07:50,361
Um, one thing
and what's that thing?

175
00:07:50,440 --> 00:07:52,096
The thing is for somebody
to pay their student loans.

176
00:07:52,120 --> 00:07:55,727
Now go upstairs and finish your...
Do something and get packed.

177
00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:57,450
Okay, Dad, sure.

178
00:07:57,520 --> 00:07:59,480
But I know you're not talking
about student loans.

179
00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:00,726
Go get packed.

180
00:08:00,800 --> 00:08:02,086
Packed?
Where is he going?

181
00:08:02,160 --> 00:08:03,924
He and you, you're both
going to your mom's.

182
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:05,736
I have work to do, so you
and your brother are going.

183
00:08:05,760 --> 00:08:06,886
She's coming to pick you up.

184
00:08:06,960 --> 00:08:09,486
I'm 17, I do not
have to go to my mom's.

185
00:08:09,560 --> 00:08:12,006
I am not leaving you
in this house on Halloween.

186
00:08:12,080 --> 00:08:15,289
I don't care if you're 17,
you're not staying here alone.

187
00:08:15,360 --> 00:08:17,089
Okay, well then
Aday can stay with me.

188
00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:18,366
How about that?

189
00:08:18,440 --> 00:08:20,090
- I will?
- Yes, you will.

190
00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:23,050
Oh, actually, my parents wouldn't mind
me staying here for Halloween.

191
00:08:23,120 --> 00:08:26,124
- We don't celebrate it anyways.
- My dad...

192
00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:27,896
Well, I think he'd actually
be okay with it, actually,

193
00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:31,003
because every Halloween,
we just go to church.

194
00:08:31,080 --> 00:08:34,050
- To church?
- Yes, church on Halloween, sir.

195
00:08:34,120 --> 00:08:36,176
Actually, a lot of the parents
don't like their children

196
00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:39,966
celebrating the Devil's holiday with
the ghosts and the goblins and whatnot.

197
00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:41,536
So they bring their children to church.

198
00:08:41,560 --> 00:08:44,450
They get dressed up
in holy costumes and Bible characters.

199
00:08:44,520 --> 00:08:46,176
You know, last year
I was actually the Ghost.

200
00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:48,441
Wait, you just said
they don't celebrate ghosts.

201
00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:50,045
Oh, no, the Holy Ghost.

202
00:08:50,120 --> 00:08:52,771
Yeah, and then we also have
a carnival, as well.

203
00:08:52,840 --> 00:08:55,446
We give candy out to the children
so they don't feel left out.

204
00:08:55,520 --> 00:08:57,443
And the adults,
they have a prayer service.

205
00:08:57,520 --> 00:08:59,736
And it's all good, it's all jolly
and we just love getting together...

206
00:08:59,760 --> 00:09:00,921
Okay. Okay, all right.

207
00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:02,445
- Thank you. Thank you.
- Yes, sir.

208
00:09:02,560 --> 00:09:04,176
- Please go ahead and call him.
- No, no, no.

209
00:09:04,200 --> 00:09:05,440
Thank you very much.

210
00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:06,976
But no, I'm not leaving you
in this house.

211
00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:08,696
No, okay, there's no way
I'm going to Mom's.

212
00:09:08,720 --> 00:09:10,927
Absolutely no, no, no, no, no.

213
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:14,527
No way. We're staying.
So call her dad.

214
00:09:14,600 --> 00:09:15,806
[sighs]

215
00:09:15,880 --> 00:09:18,406
- Come on, Aday.
- Ooh.

216
00:09:22,240 --> 00:09:24,527
[Aday]
I do not know about this party tonight.

217
00:09:27,560 --> 00:09:31,690
- I don't wanna go.
- No, it'll be fun. Okay, listen.

218
00:09:31,800 --> 00:09:34,610
We have to go.
Girl, we cannot stay in this house.

219
00:09:34,680 --> 00:09:36,489
Leah and Rain are going.
It'll be fun.

220
00:09:36,560 --> 00:09:38,449
But, I... It's just...

221
00:09:38,520 --> 00:09:42,161
No! No, but nothing, okay? Come on. Sit.

222
00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:44,447
Listen, they like us.

223
00:09:44,560 --> 00:09:46,722
And they're the most
popular girls in school.

224
00:09:46,800 --> 00:09:48,882
- [whispering] Popular...
- Okay? We can't not go

225
00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:51,645
and be right where we were
when we first got to that school.

226
00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:53,722
They're popular because
they wear those baby shirts

227
00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:55,609
that shows what the Good Lord gave 'em.

228
00:09:55,680 --> 00:09:57,648
Plus, why do they have to set the trend?

229
00:09:57,720 --> 00:10:01,486
Okay, number one,
those baby shirts are called crop tops.

230
00:10:01,560 --> 00:10:04,040
And did you see how those guys
were drooling over them?

231
00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:06,441
Did you see how they were
drooling over you?

232
00:10:06,520 --> 00:10:08,921
Because I took notes from them.

233
00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:10,570
Okay. Come on.
We gotta go to the attic,

234
00:10:10,640 --> 00:10:12,529
create something
really hot for tonight.

235
00:10:12,600 --> 00:10:14,250
- Let's get.
- [whispering] Hot...

236
00:10:14,320 --> 00:10:15,401
- [phone beeps]
- Wait.

237
00:10:16,760 --> 00:10:19,684
- He's texting me.
- Who's texting you?

238
00:10:19,760 --> 00:10:21,649
Jonathan, the cute frat boy.

239
00:10:21,720 --> 00:10:23,768
I thought that boy
was staring at Rain.

240
00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:27,606
He was, for now. Come on.

241
00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:30,005
- For now?
- Yeah.

242
00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:34,565
<i>[Debra]
She needs to stay with me.</i>

243
00:10:34,640 --> 00:10:37,136
Debra, I already told her that, okay?
She doesn't wanna stay with you.

244
00:10:37,160 --> 00:10:39,606
<i>You're her dad,
you need to put your foot down.</i>

245
00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:40,886
<i>Are you listening?</i>

246
00:10:40,960 --> 00:10:42,121
Yes, I'm listening to you.

247
00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:43,645
- <i>Well?</i>
- Yeah, I know I'm her dad.

248
00:10:43,720 --> 00:10:44,960
You're her mom, okay?

249
00:10:45,080 --> 00:10:46,684
- I can't...
- <i>Get</i> her ready!

250
00:10:46,760 --> 00:10:48,616
She doesn't wanna come,
she doesn't have to come.

251
00:10:48,640 --> 00:10:50,136
- <i>She doesn't</i> wanna go...
<i>- But she needs to.</i>

252
00:10:50,160 --> 00:10:52,731
All right, listen. Just come...
Come and pick BJ up.

253
00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:55,690
- I don't wanna argue about this.
- Now I'm on my way.

254
00:10:56,840 --> 00:10:58,126
[cell phone beeps]

255
00:10:58,200 --> 00:10:59,884
Tiffany, somebody...

256
00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:05,371
The hell?

257
00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:12,967
[sighs]

258
00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:14,880
This girl.

259
00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:19,721
[distant howling]

260
00:11:19,800 --> 00:11:22,644
[Barn]
Open your little bag up wide.

261
00:11:22,720 --> 00:11:25,087
So I can drop it
all the way down to the bottom.

262
00:11:25,160 --> 00:11:27,576
[Madea] I don't even know why
you sitting out here with these...

263
00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:29,056
What you doing with these canes, Bam?

264
00:11:29,080 --> 00:11:30,127
[kids] Trick or treat!

265
00:11:30,200 --> 00:11:31,645
[Bam] Mabel...

266
00:11:31,720 --> 00:11:34,121
You know I had hip surgery.
I need these canes.

267
00:11:34,200 --> 00:11:35,696
You don't need them canes,
stop that lying.

268
00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:37,056
I seen you running
up and down the street.

269
00:11:37,080 --> 00:11:38,570
Mabel, I need these canes,

270
00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:40,563
and let me tell you,
they were high as hell, too.

271
00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:43,962
Too much for a woman on a fixed income
and I ain't got no extra money

272
00:11:44,040 --> 00:11:46,281
to be wasting on no canes like these.

273
00:11:46,360 --> 00:11:49,648
So I gotta use these so that I don't
have to go back to the hospital.

274
00:11:49,720 --> 00:11:50,816
I know them
two little girls right there.

275
00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:52,365
If you... Hold on
just a second, honey.

276
00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:54,096
If you're so worried
about money on a fixed income,

277
00:11:54,120 --> 00:11:56,616
why the hell are you out here
giving these little heathens candy?

278
00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:59,610
- Mabel, I like this.
- No, Bam, uh-uh. No.

279
00:11:59,680 --> 00:12:01,336
This is why I'm not
in my damn house right now.

280
00:12:01,360 --> 00:12:03,567
- What?
- I don't like no doggone Halloween.

281
00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:05,776
I'm not gonna be giving them children
no candy for free. Hell!

282
00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:08,406
When I was growing up, do you know
what I had to do for candy?

283
00:12:08,480 --> 00:12:09,656
Do you know
what I had to do for candy?

284
00:12:09,680 --> 00:12:10,886
What, Mabel?

285
00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:12,684
I had to give up candy to get candy.

286
00:12:12,760 --> 00:12:14,330
That's why.
But I'm not gonna do that,

287
00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:16,289
spend my hard-earned money
on no candy gifting.

288
00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:18,567
It's going in my retirement,
my Ho-O-1-K.

289
00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:20,563
I'm not gonna do it,
give no child no candy.

290
00:12:20,640 --> 00:12:22,847
Mabel, what is Ho-O-1-K?

291
00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:24,410
It's for hoes.

292
00:12:24,480 --> 00:12:27,245
It's for all of those women
who never ever

293
00:12:27,320 --> 00:12:30,210
were able to pay taxes on their money
because they got it illegally.

294
00:12:30,280 --> 00:12:33,762
So you put the money aside.
It's not a 401 K, it's a Ho-O-1-K.

295
00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:35,056
- That's why I got a Ho-O-1-K.
- Oh!

296
00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:37,401
Yeah, from back in the day
when I was stripping.

297
00:12:37,480 --> 00:12:39,200
- I wonder why...
- When I was on that pole.

298
00:12:39,240 --> 00:12:42,130
I'm not gonna spend
my Ho-O-1-K on nobody.

299
00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:44,336
No, I'm not gonna do that,
giving no children no candy.

300
00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:46,010
I don't know why you doing it.

301
00:12:46,080 --> 00:12:47,256
Now, see, look at this.
Look at this.

302
00:12:47,280 --> 00:12:49,681
- Trick or treat.
- Oh!

303
00:12:49,760 --> 00:12:51,683
Look at his little outfit!

304
00:12:51,760 --> 00:12:54,206
Here you go!
Here you go, baby, right here.

305
00:12:54,280 --> 00:12:55,327
What's he supposed to be?

306
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:56,686
He's a G.I.

307
00:12:56,760 --> 00:12:57,807
Thank you.

308
00:12:57,920 --> 00:12:58,967
You're welcome.

309
00:12:59,040 --> 00:13:00,326
He salute.
[laughs]

310
00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:01,686
Yeah.
[laughs]

311
00:13:01,800 --> 00:13:03,211
- Barn.
- I like them a bit...

312
00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:05,282
- Barn. I saw your ass.
- Yeah.

313
00:13:06,280 --> 00:13:08,726
Saw me do what?

314
00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:10,006
[chuckles] Bam!

315
00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:12,765
Barn, I saw you drop
a little piece of candy up in there

316
00:13:12,840 --> 00:13:14,336
and take four or five pieces
out of that baby bag.

317
00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:16,089
- What the hell?
- Shh!

318
00:13:16,160 --> 00:13:17,730
Is that what you out here doing?

319
00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:19,404
Mabel, shh!

320
00:13:19,480 --> 00:13:21,296
- Why you doing that?
- Mabel, sometimes you get

321
00:13:21,320 --> 00:13:24,722
the munchies after you smoke, honey,
and this candy be coming in handy.

322
00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:28,043
And lookit, I been doing this for years.

323
00:13:28,160 --> 00:13:29,400
- Barn.
- What?

324
00:13:29,480 --> 00:13:30,811
You high now, ain't you?

325
00:13:31,480 --> 00:13:33,403
Yeah.
[laughs]

326
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:37,405
Uh-uh. Mabel, look, don't judge me.
I got a prescription.

327
00:13:37,480 --> 00:13:40,723
I'm so glad, I was so glad
when this thing finally came!

328
00:13:40,840 --> 00:13:44,447
Hey! I can't wait
to show it to the police.

329
00:13:44,520 --> 00:13:45,885
Put that away, Bam.

330
00:13:45,960 --> 00:13:47,296
Sitting here high,
taking candy from babies.

331
00:13:47,320 --> 00:13:48,656
You ought to be
ashamed of yourself.

332
00:13:48,680 --> 00:13:49,856
Well, you gotta teach them something.

333
00:13:49,880 --> 00:13:52,536
You gotta teach 'em something
and you gotta teach them at some time.

334
00:13:52,560 --> 00:13:54,050
I don't like this Halloween stuff.

335
00:13:54,120 --> 00:13:55,565
- Trick or treat.
- Oh!

336
00:13:55,640 --> 00:13:57,416
I'm the trick, she the treat.
Now go the hell on.

337
00:13:57,440 --> 00:13:59,204
Why they got that boy
dressed like a cow?

338
00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:01,009
You ought to be
ashamed of yourself.

339
00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:03,096
Got that child dressed
like chocolate milk in a box.

340
00:14:03,120 --> 00:14:04,485
- Mabel!
- What?

341
00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:06,767
Don't do that.
You gonna scar this baby.

342
00:14:06,840 --> 00:14:08,296
[Madea]
But you better watch him, Bam.

343
00:14:08,320 --> 00:14:09,616
- Mmm-mmm.
- Uh-uh, you better watch him,

344
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:11,210
- he look like Biggie, Barn.
- Mmm-mmm.

345
00:14:11,280 --> 00:14:12,616
That's a O.G. right there.
I'm telling you right now.

346
00:14:12,640 --> 00:14:14,369
[rapping]

347
00:14:14,440 --> 00:14:15,496
- [Barn] Mabel!
- [Madea] What? I'm telling you,

348
00:14:15,520 --> 00:14:16,760
you better watch him.

349
00:14:16,840 --> 00:14:18,410
He... He ain't gonna fall for that.

350
00:14:18,480 --> 00:14:20,164
He counting every one
of them damn candies.

351
00:14:20,240 --> 00:14:21,651
He ain't counting calories,

352
00:14:21,720 --> 00:14:23,882
but he counting them damn candies.
[chuckles]

353
00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:25,291
Shut your mouth, will you?

354
00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:26,616
I'm telling you, you better be careful,

355
00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:28,369
Rick Ross gonna get you.
[chuckles]

356
00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:31,161
[clears throat]

357
00:14:31,240 --> 00:14:34,847
Hey, baby. Don't mind her at all.
You just come stay right there.

358
00:14:34,920 --> 00:14:37,207
Let me pick and see
which one I'm gonna give you.

359
00:14:37,280 --> 00:14:40,727
- I'm gonna give you two of these.
- You about to get stabbed.

360
00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:42,896
- Look at this. Here you go!
- That boy ain't playing.

361
00:14:42,920 --> 00:14:44,809
Put it down here
so I can put it in there.

362
00:14:44,880 --> 00:14:47,087
Here you go, baby! There you go.

363
00:14:47,880 --> 00:14:49,450
Oh, Lord...

364
00:14:49,520 --> 00:14:52,000
There you go. All right, go on.

365
00:14:52,120 --> 00:14:53,849
[both chuckling]

366
00:14:53,920 --> 00:14:54,967
Wait a minute.

367
00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:56,286
What'd I tell you?

368
00:14:56,360 --> 00:14:58,488
I had more candy in here than this.

369
00:14:58,560 --> 00:15:01,166
Biggie about to shoot you, Tupac.

370
00:15:01,240 --> 00:15:02,480
I don't... I don't know what...

371
00:15:02,560 --> 00:15:04,722
I have no idea
what you talking about.

372
00:15:04,840 --> 00:15:08,811
You took candy
from my pumpkin, grandma.

373
00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:12,009
No, I didn't do that, baby.
Why would I do that? Mabel?

374
00:15:12,080 --> 00:15:13,081
[chuckling]

375
00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:14,491
You tricked me.

376
00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:16,250
You put candy in
but took a handful out.

377
00:15:16,320 --> 00:15:17,401
What... Did you do that?

378
00:15:17,520 --> 00:15:19,841
Did you see me do that?
Listen, let me tell you something.

379
00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:22,446
You need to teach your son
these principles at home, honey.

380
00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:25,251
That's why they call it
"trick or treat."

381
00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:26,691
[Madea laughing]

382
00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:28,967
That is not nice.
What's wrong with you?

383
00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:30,896
Hold on now, you ain't finna be
gettin' on my damn friend.

384
00:15:30,920 --> 00:15:32,365
Let me tell you something, honey.

385
00:15:32,440 --> 00:15:34,807
You gone and had your child
disrespecting her, okay?

386
00:15:34,880 --> 00:15:36,803
If she say she didn't do it,
she didn't do it.

387
00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:38,370
You understand?
We let us... Hold on.

388
00:15:38,440 --> 00:15:40,176
You talk about look at her?
Look at your child.

389
00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:42,123
What about... What about him?
He is just perfect.

390
00:15:42,200 --> 00:15:45,044
What's wrong?
You asking what's wrong with her?

391
00:15:45,120 --> 00:15:47,521
What's wrong with your damn child?

392
00:15:47,600 --> 00:15:48,886
- [Barn] Mabel. Mabel.
- What?

393
00:15:48,960 --> 00:15:50,086
That baby can hear you.

394
00:15:50,160 --> 00:15:51,810
I don't give a damn if he can hear me.

395
00:15:51,880 --> 00:15:53,216
Come out here, you got him
trick or treating for candy.

396
00:15:53,240 --> 00:15:56,403
You need to have him trick or treating
for a damn treadmill or an elliptical.

397
00:15:56,480 --> 00:15:57,766
- Momma!
- It's okay!

398
00:15:57,840 --> 00:15:59,410
- It's okay! It's okay!
- Come on, bull!

399
00:15:59,520 --> 00:16:01,296
- [furiously growling]
- Come on, bull! Come on, bull!

400
00:16:01,320 --> 00:16:03,004
Come on, bull!
Come on, bull!

401
00:16:03,080 --> 00:16:05,890
You run your ass up on me,
I'ma make some steak!

402
00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:07,564
- Mabel.
- What?

403
00:16:07,640 --> 00:16:08,776
- They need to learn some time.
- [distant jingle]

404
00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:09,801
- Mabel.
- What?

405
00:16:09,880 --> 00:16:11,530
What the hell is that?
What is that?

406
00:16:11,600 --> 00:16:14,001
Some damn person acting the fool
dressed like a clown.

407
00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:15,650
I don't like this.

408
00:16:15,720 --> 00:16:17,896
They better not come over here with
their foolishness. That's what I know.

409
00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:19,729
Mabel, I'm scared. I don't like this.

410
00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:21,136
- What the hell you scared of?
- Because I don't like this.

411
00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:23,925
Who you know ride up in a box?

412
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:26,970
And he wind it up, you let something
jump up out of that damn box.

413
00:16:27,040 --> 00:16:28,456
- Come over here. My friend is scared.
- [cell phone ringing]

414
00:16:28,480 --> 00:16:29,576
Don't come over here
with that foolishness.

415
00:16:29,600 --> 00:16:30,840
Don't come over here!

416
00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:32,416
That's gonna make him
come over here, Bam.

417
00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:34,249
- Here he come.
- Hello?

418
00:16:34,320 --> 00:16:36,926
- Hey, Madea. How you doing?
- Hey, Brian. How you doing?

419
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:38,331
<i>I'm good. I'm good.</i>

420
00:16:38,400 --> 00:16:39,896
Listen, I gotta go
out of town until Sunday

421
00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:42,216
and I was wondering if you can come by
and just keep an eye on Tiffany?

422
00:16:42,240 --> 00:16:44,607
No, son. No, I can't come over there.
It's Halloween night,

423
00:16:44,680 --> 00:16:46,216
you know I don't like to go
nowhere on Halloween.

424
00:16:46,240 --> 00:16:47,456
- Yeah, I know.
- <i>My feet hurting...</i>

425
00:16:47,480 --> 00:16:48,925
I ain't got no gas in my car.

426
00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:50,096
- Okay, great, I get it.
- <i>I got gout in...</i>

427
00:16:50,120 --> 00:16:51,451
<i>[Bam] Mabel.</i>

428
00:16:51,520 --> 00:16:53,016
Hush, Barn. Calm down.
Don't worry about that fool

429
00:16:53,040 --> 00:16:54,296
coming over here.
Let him come over here.

430
00:16:54,320 --> 00:16:56,136
- I don't like no clowns.
- It's gonna be all right.

431
00:16:56,160 --> 00:16:57,969
Don't come over here.

432
00:16:58,040 --> 00:16:59,976
You better not come over here
with this foolishness like...

433
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:01,331
<i>dressed up like a damn clown.</i>

434
00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:05,121
My breast is hurting, my back
is hurting. You know, we hit this age

435
00:17:05,200 --> 00:17:07,056
<i>everything hurts something.
No, son. No, I can't.</i>

436
00:17:07,080 --> 00:17:08,081
<i>I'll</i> pay You-

437
00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:10,083
I'm on my way.
I'll be there in an hour.

438
00:17:10,160 --> 00:17:11,730
That's what I thought.

439
00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:15,480
Look. Look, there. There. There.

440
00:17:15,560 --> 00:17:17,801
Don't come over here
with that damn foolishness.

441
00:17:17,880 --> 00:17:19,484
I'm telling you right now.

442
00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:21,125
- [Barn] Dea.
- Don't be scared, honey.

443
00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:23,009
[Madea]
Look here, you scaring my friend.

444
00:17:23,080 --> 00:17:25,208
- Mmm-mmm. Look. Mmm-mmm.
- Bam, calm down.

445
00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:29,444
My friend is scared. Y'all need to
go the hell on with all that foo...

446
00:17:29,520 --> 00:17:30,646
Oh, you think I'm playing.

447
00:17:30,720 --> 00:17:32,016
See, now that's what I'm talking about.

448
00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:33,485
Let something jump up out of there.

449
00:17:33,560 --> 00:17:36,006
Let something jump up
out of this damn box.

450
00:17:36,080 --> 00:17:37,525
Let something come up out of there.

451
00:17:37,600 --> 00:17:38,601
Boo!

452
00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:42,163
- [Hattie] Damn, y'all!
- Yeah, you get.

453
00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:44,083
You got knocked the... out.

454
00:17:44,160 --> 00:17:46,481
[Joe] Damn, Dea.
You ain't got to hit her like that.

455
00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:48,562
- Joe?
- [Hattie] Help me up off this ground.

456
00:17:48,640 --> 00:17:50,768
[Madea] Hattie?
What the hell wrong with y'all?

457
00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:53,531
Damn, Ma! You ain't had
to punch me like that.

458
00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:56,251
- You lucky I didn't shoot your ass!
- You all right, Hattie?

459
00:17:56,320 --> 00:18:00,006
Hell, no, I ain't all right.
She just punched me like a damn dude.

460
00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:01,296
The hell wrong with you, Hattie?

461
00:18:01,320 --> 00:18:02,776
You know black people
scared of every damn thing.

462
00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:04,736
- You all right, baby. Walk it off.
- Walk it off?

463
00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:06,046
- Walk it off.
- Walk it off?

464
00:18:06,120 --> 00:18:07,929
- Walk it off.
- I ain't walking nothing off.

465
00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:09,816
Look at Barn out here
shaking like a salt shaker.

466
00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:12,136
Barn always shaking.
Hell, every time she walk, she shaking.

467
00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:14,083
It's called aftershock.

468
00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:15,730
You wrong for that, Ma.

469
00:18:15,800 --> 00:18:18,201
We weren't doing nothing
but trying to scare y'all.

470
00:18:18,280 --> 00:18:21,648
Don't do that, Hattie.
You know I'm scared of everything.

471
00:18:21,720 --> 00:18:23,816
[Madea] Right, yeah, you know
every time she gets too scared

472
00:18:23,840 --> 00:18:26,844
she drop a tear and if she laugh
too hard, she'll squirt a little pee.

473
00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:28,416
Mabel, you don't have to
keep telling everybody that.

474
00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:30,044
- Well, it's the truth.
- No, it ain't.

475
00:18:30,120 --> 00:18:31,416
Yes. You know you squirt a little pee

476
00:18:31,440 --> 00:18:33,056
- every time you get scared.
- No, I don't!

477
00:18:33,080 --> 00:18:34,600
It's true. You probably wet right now.

478
00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:39,490
- I'll be... I'll be right back.
- See? What I tell you?

479
00:18:39,560 --> 00:18:42,245
Hurry up in there.
We gotta go on over to Brian's house.

480
00:18:42,320 --> 00:18:44,049
Oh, hell, they got drinks over there.

481
00:18:44,120 --> 00:18:45,416
- [Hattie] Drinks?
- Ain't nobody invite you over there.

482
00:18:45,440 --> 00:18:47,816
You ain't getting in my car
till you take them damn clown suits off.

483
00:18:47,840 --> 00:18:50,605
Come on, Joe. Ain't nobody
got to invite me for a drink.

484
00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:53,040
- Hurry up! Hurry up in there, Barn!
- I'm gonna get me one.

485
00:18:58,120 --> 00:18:59,360
[knocking on door]

486
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:05,085
Madea, hey.

487
00:19:05,160 --> 00:19:08,164
Hey, there. How you doing, baby?
Good to see you.

488
00:19:08,240 --> 00:19:10,368
I'll tell you about it when you go in.

489
00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:13,171
- You brought my daddy.
- What up, bitch?

490
00:19:13,240 --> 00:19:15,527
Daddy, don't use
that language in this house.

491
00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:16,886
[laughs]

492
00:19:18,120 --> 00:19:19,121
[sighs]

493
00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:24,170
- Hey, Brian!
- Oh, Ms. Hattie, how you doing?

494
00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:26,766
- Hey! Give me a hug.
- Oh, no. Oh, no, no.

495
00:19:26,840 --> 00:19:28,016
I'll pass on that.
I'll pass on that.

496
00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:29,849
- Why?
- You know why!

497
00:19:29,920 --> 00:19:33,686
Every time you hug up on him,
you thrust your pelvis into his.

498
00:19:33,760 --> 00:19:36,604
What? He a grown-ass man,
he can take it.

499
00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:40,526
- I don't want to take it, Ms. Hattie.
- You can take it if you want to, Brian.

500
00:19:40,600 --> 00:19:43,136
I don't want to take it, Ms. Hattie.
Thank you, I don't wanna take it.

501
00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:44,736
Hattie, I know damn well
you are not flirtin'.

502
00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:46,496
Keep it up I'ma knock you
upside your head, hell.

503
00:19:46,520 --> 00:19:48,536
Now, Joe, I done told you
about talkin' at me like that.

504
00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:50,164
You think I'm some baby...

505
00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:51,576
You sit down over there,
shit and hell.

506
00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:53,204
[Hattie shouting indistinctly]

507
00:19:53,280 --> 00:19:57,365
Would y'all stop all that?
Calm down.

508
00:19:58,200 --> 00:20:01,249
Brian, come on, baby, can you please
help me in here to the chairs, baby?

509
00:20:01,320 --> 00:20:03,926
- Help you, sure.
- Yeah. Please, help me in here.

510
00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:05,684
Listen, the steps are
too hard for me now.

511
00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:07,922
- Yes, I know.
- Ever since my hip surgery.

512
00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:10,336
- Didn't know you were coming.
- You didn't know I was coming?

513
00:20:10,360 --> 00:20:13,170
But did you know I had hip surgery?
You know I had hip... Listen.

514
00:20:13,240 --> 00:20:15,720
- Somebody told me.
- That man cut me...

515
00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:17,564
- Did he?
- Yes, he did. Him.

516
00:20:17,640 --> 00:20:19,376
He cut me, Brian,
all the way from down here,

517
00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:20,731
all the way back here...

518
00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:22,296
- mid my apple.
- Hey, you need your cane?

519
00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:24,721
Yeah, I need these canes.
I need 'em. Just set 'em...

520
00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:26,802
Yes, I'm on the canes, now.
I need 'em, yeah.

521
00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:29,531
- But you gave 'em to...
- Yeah, put 'em over there.

522
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:31,176
Sit 'em up there on the wall,
over there.

523
00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:34,488
Listen, Brian,
but I just thank God...

524
00:20:34,560 --> 00:20:37,131
- Thank God that I'm in my right mind.
- Hmm.

525
00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:39,646
- And that my heart is still beating.
- Hmm.

526
00:20:39,720 --> 00:20:41,131
- Ho!
- Yeah.

527
00:20:41,200 --> 00:20:43,726
Sometimes I can't
hardly pee, though.

528
00:20:43,800 --> 00:20:46,246
Thank you so much for sharing.
I appreciate it, thank you.

529
00:20:46,320 --> 00:20:48,322
Bam, that ain't polite conversation.

530
00:20:48,400 --> 00:20:50,176
You know, just one or two drops,
Mabel, that's it.

531
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:52,328
Don't nobody wanna hear
about your one or two drops.

532
00:20:52,400 --> 00:20:54,084
I wonder why that is.

533
00:20:54,160 --> 00:20:55,764
It's prostate cancer, that's what it is.

534
00:20:55,840 --> 00:20:58,525
You got that prostate...
You got the prostate cancer.

535
00:20:58,600 --> 00:21:00,409
Joe, shut up!

536
00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:02,256
What the hell you think it is?
What the hell else is it,

537
00:21:02,280 --> 00:21:03,691
if it ain't prostate ca...

538
00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:06,376
That's the only thing keep you from
peein'. She said she get two drops.

539
00:21:06,400 --> 00:21:10,166
One say "prostate," other say "cancer."
Prostate cancer. That's what she got.

540
00:21:10,240 --> 00:21:11,446
- She got it.
- [Madea] Joe.

541
00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:13,522
Don't no woman have no prostate.

542
00:21:16,520 --> 00:21:20,730
Mabel, you know damn well
you got a prostate.

543
00:21:25,560 --> 00:21:26,800
You know what I'm gonna do?

544
00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:29,256
I'm gonna give you a prostate exam
with this foot right here.

545
00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:30,520
Right here. Say something else.

546
00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:31,840
Hell, you ain't, either.

547
00:21:31,920 --> 00:21:33,604
This here? This ass?
"Do not enter."

548
00:21:33,680 --> 00:21:35,045
Sign on it, tattoo.

549
00:21:35,120 --> 00:21:36,776
- Do not enter back there.
- [Hattie] Hell, no!

550
00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:39,246
- Who the hell you think I am?
- Shut up.

551
00:21:39,360 --> 00:21:42,489
Hello? Can we just focus on
why I asked you to come...

552
00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:44,296
Who the hell is he,
who the hell he hollerin' at?

553
00:21:44,320 --> 00:21:45,936
You asked me to come over
to your damn house.

554
00:21:45,960 --> 00:21:47,564
Don't be hollerin' at me up in here.

555
00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:51,645
- Don't get gutted up in here.
- Right. Like a fish.

556
00:21:51,720 --> 00:21:53,456
Okay, sorry. Sorry.
I didn't mean that at all.

557
00:21:53,480 --> 00:21:56,563
Yes, that's better. That's better.
Show some apologection up in here.

558
00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:59,246
- Apologection into the room.
- Okay, I'm sorry.

559
00:21:59,320 --> 00:22:00,856
I'm glad you're here
to help me with her,

560
00:22:00,880 --> 00:22:02,376
'cause there's a frat party
around the corner.

561
00:22:02,400 --> 00:22:05,290
And I wanna be sure she doesn't try to
sneak out and go over there, okay?

562
00:22:05,360 --> 00:22:08,443
- She too young for that!
- [softly] I know. I...

563
00:22:08,520 --> 00:22:11,364
I don't know about that, I remember
I used to go to a frat party, man.

564
00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:14,569
We had them girls up in there.
Oh! God damn.

565
00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:18,565
- Hell, no. She can't go over there.
- [Hattie] What?

566
00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:23,567
When I was goin' I was 15, baby.
And I was the entertainment, then.

567
00:22:23,640 --> 00:22:24,976
All right, you were
the entertainment, I get it.

568
00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:27,924
Thank you. Okay, listen.
I'm glad you're here. 'Cause I...

569
00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:29,336
I want you to be quiet,
if you don't mind,

570
00:22:29,360 --> 00:22:32,842
'cause I don't want her to know that
you all are here until after I'm gone.

571
00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:34,524
Hold the hell on.

572
00:22:34,600 --> 00:22:36,016
You finna leave, you ain't
gonna tell her you're going?

573
00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:38,327
- Looks like he's scared of her.
- Right.

574
00:22:38,400 --> 00:22:40,016
Damn, boy.
You lettin' a girl run over you?

575
00:22:40,040 --> 00:22:41,690
Look how you
standin' there sweatin'.

576
00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:44,525
- [stuttering] Listen, I...
- These children today.

577
00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:45,896
No, it ain't the children, baby,
it's the parents.

578
00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:49,970
It's these damn parents.
The parents I don't understand.

579
00:22:50,040 --> 00:22:51,804
That's what it is. Right there.

580
00:22:51,880 --> 00:22:54,136
If these parents were getting in charge
of these children here,

581
00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:55,536
we wouldn't be having all these issues.

582
00:22:55,560 --> 00:22:59,804
Come on, you know. Those teenage years,
when they turn into a teenager.

583
00:22:59,880 --> 00:23:01,296
Boy, I remember them
teenage years, baby,

584
00:23:01,320 --> 00:23:02,970
I remember them teenage years.

585
00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:04,849
You got to drop the damn hammer.

586
00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:06,843
- Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.
- Drop the hammer on them.

587
00:23:06,920 --> 00:23:08,285
Them teenage years, hell.

588
00:23:08,360 --> 00:23:09,850
I'm tellin' ya, I keeps me a hammer.

589
00:23:09,920 --> 00:23:12,969
Now we know what the problem is,
anybody in here got a solution?

590
00:23:13,040 --> 00:23:14,976
Is he slow? He don't understand
nothin' I'm saying.

591
00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:18,322
Hattie, can you explain this to him
in a language that he understands?

592
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:21,006
Whoop. That. Ass.

593
00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:22,809
[Hattie snorts and laughs]

594
00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:24,490
All in favor say "aye."

595
00:23:24,560 --> 00:23:25,891
- [all] Aye.
- The ayes have it.

596
00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:27,096
- Where she at?
- Where she at?

597
00:23:27,120 --> 00:23:31,045
- I get the switch.
- Sit down. I am not hitting my child.

598
00:23:31,120 --> 00:23:33,691
What? You can't stomach it?

599
00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:36,331
- We'll whoop that ass for you!
- No!

600
00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:38,323
Nobody is hitting my child, okay?

601
00:23:38,400 --> 00:23:39,896
I told them early
you need to whip them kids,

602
00:23:39,920 --> 00:23:41,416
I been tellin' him
since they were little.

603
00:23:41,440 --> 00:23:43,522
"Whoop her! Whoop her!
Whoop her ass! Whoop her ass!

604
00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:45,736
Whoop her ass! Whoop her ass!
Whoop her ass! Whoop her ass!

605
00:23:45,760 --> 00:23:47,842
Whoop her ass! Whoop her ass!"
What'd he do?

606
00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:49,331
He don't whoop her ass.

607
00:23:49,400 --> 00:23:52,404
Listen, we have never spanked our
children, ever. We didn't do that.

608
00:23:52,480 --> 00:23:53,970
We weren't those kind of parents.

609
00:23:54,040 --> 00:23:56,646
- Well, that's the problem right there!
- [Bam] That's right.

610
00:23:56,720 --> 00:23:59,096
That's right, that's right! Whoop her.
Baby, let me tell you something.

611
00:23:59,120 --> 00:24:01,176
I'm not tellin' you to go up there
and abuse no child.

612
00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:02,376
Even though
I got a hammer in my purse.

613
00:24:02,400 --> 00:24:04,209
I'm just kidding about the hammer.

614
00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:05,281
[softly] No, I'm not.

615
00:24:05,360 --> 00:24:07,936
But listen, what I'm trying to get you
to understand is very, very simple, son.

616
00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:10,361
Hear me clearly. A little love tap
ain't never hurt nobody.

617
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:12,841
- There it is. Love tap.
- [Madea] A little love tap.

618
00:24:12,920 --> 00:24:14,649
Just tap your child.
A little love tap.

619
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:16,768
Like I did you,
I gave you lots of love taps.

620
00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:18,285
Lot... What?

621
00:24:18,360 --> 00:24:20,761
Hold on a second,
did you just say "love tap"?

622
00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:22,126
No, no, no, no, no.

623
00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:25,568
That wasn't a love tap,
I was on life support.

624
00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:27,016
Are you...
Are you blaming that on me?

625
00:24:27,040 --> 00:24:28,565
That is not my fault.

626
00:24:28,640 --> 00:24:30,336
What'd I have to do with you
being on life support?

627
00:24:30,360 --> 00:24:33,569
Am I missing something? I was
four years old. Whose fault was it?

628
00:24:33,640 --> 00:24:36,962
I told your ass to stop talking back
to me and what did you do?

629
00:24:37,040 --> 00:24:39,407
I said... [imitates babbling]
I was talking back.

630
00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:42,529
Right. So when I bust your ass
and you ended up

631
00:24:42,600 --> 00:24:48,960
in the damn life support situation,
whose problem did that belong to?

632
00:24:50,920 --> 00:24:53,844
You better hold up,
she gonna explode her prostate.

633
00:24:53,920 --> 00:24:55,922
[Madea]
Right. That's your own damn fault.

634
00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:57,056
The defense rests, Your Honor.

635
00:24:57,080 --> 00:24:58,256
- Mmm-hmm.
- The case is closed.

636
00:24:58,280 --> 00:25:00,726
Thank you. The jury has been excused.

637
00:25:02,440 --> 00:25:03,616
You guys don't understand, okay?

638
00:25:03,640 --> 00:25:07,008
I know in your day you could do that,
you could beat kids, you could slap 'em,

639
00:25:07,080 --> 00:25:08,536
but this is a different day and time.

640
00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:09,976
You can't spank your kids
these days, okay?

641
00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:11,764
You go to jail
for things like that now.

642
00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:13,763
That's what it is?
You're politically correct.

643
00:25:13,840 --> 00:25:16,650
Let me tell you somethin' about
"you can't hit your kids these days."

644
00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:18,609
And hear me clearly
when I say this to you, son.

645
00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:22,571
Bullshit! Bullshit!
Bullshit! Bullshit! Bullshit!

646
00:25:22,640 --> 00:25:25,736
Daddy, I'm gonna tell you one more time,
stop using that language in this house.

647
00:25:25,760 --> 00:25:27,728
Bullshit! Bullshit!
Bullshit! Bullshit!

648
00:25:27,800 --> 00:25:29,165
[Madea] Joe, shut up!

649
00:25:29,240 --> 00:25:31,811
Stop all that saying all them cuss words
up in here, Joe, hell.

650
00:25:31,880 --> 00:25:34,336
Boy, if I didn't whoop your ass
you know where you'd be right now?

651
00:25:34,360 --> 00:25:35,456
Somewhere strung out on drugs.

652
00:25:35,480 --> 00:25:37,496
You don't know the hell...
trying to get 20 dollars for a fix.

653
00:25:37,520 --> 00:25:39,056
You don't know what the hell
you talkin' 'bout.

654
00:25:39,080 --> 00:25:40,800
That's why you turned out
well like you did.

655
00:25:40,840 --> 00:25:42,056
That's why you're a federal prosecutor.

656
00:25:42,080 --> 00:25:44,736
Hell, I beat you so much you were scared
to look at a damn crack pipe.

657
00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:46,216
You ain't know
what a damn crack pipe was.

658
00:25:46,240 --> 00:25:48,004
You know what a crack pipe
is now, don't you?

659
00:25:48,080 --> 00:25:49,776
See, he still don't know
what the hell a crack pipe is.

660
00:25:49,800 --> 00:25:52,485
You know why that is?
'Cause I beat your <i>ass.</i>

661
00:25:52,560 --> 00:25:55,803
[Madea] You sure did, you was
rough on that boy. I felt so bad.

662
00:25:55,880 --> 00:25:57,370
See, your daddy was raw.

663
00:25:57,440 --> 00:25:59,216
He'd beat the hell out you
and leave you out in the street,

664
00:25:59,240 --> 00:26:00,810
just bloody guts all over, everywhere.

665
00:26:00,880 --> 00:26:02,484
I at least would
take you to the hospital

666
00:26:02,560 --> 00:26:03,925
after I knocked the hell out you.

667
00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:07,840
Look, son, just go on up them
stairs, and do what I had to do to you

668
00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:10,884
that day that you got mad at me.
Just go on, do what you gotta do, son.

669
00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:12,291
Bite the bullet.

670
00:26:12,360 --> 00:26:16,729
I am not taking my daughter on the roof
and throwing her off.

671
00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:18,484
Why wouldn't you do that?

672
00:26:18,560 --> 00:26:20,688
- He did that?
- Yes!

673
00:26:20,760 --> 00:26:22,762
- [laughs]
- [Madea] He sure did.

674
00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:24,046
I'ma just tell you somethin',

675
00:26:24,120 --> 00:26:25,256
if you're gonna try
and teach a child a lesson

676
00:26:25,280 --> 00:26:27,806
and push 'em off a roof,
at least check they pockets.

677
00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:29,530
Joe, you should have
checked his pockets.

678
00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:33,650
I forgot about that little pencil. Oh.
Number two, yellow stick.

679
00:26:33,720 --> 00:26:35,563
He had his little pencil
in his pocket...

680
00:26:35,640 --> 00:26:37,016
Little pencil went straight through

681
00:26:37,040 --> 00:26:39,122
- one of his little balls.
- [all exclaim]

682
00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:41,561
Looked like a little
Tootsie Roll on a stick.

683
00:26:41,640 --> 00:26:42,926
That poor thing.

684
00:26:43,760 --> 00:26:45,808
I was traumatized.

685
00:26:46,120 --> 00:26:48,851
Let me ask you somethin'.
Did you die?

686
00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:50,724
That's not funny.
That's not funny.

687
00:26:50,800 --> 00:26:53,849
I bet that's just
so interesting to see.

688
00:26:53,920 --> 00:26:56,844
[chuckles]

689
00:26:56,920 --> 00:26:59,241
I just wanna look at it.

690
00:26:59,320 --> 00:27:02,085
I bet you have problems
peein' too, don't you?

691
00:27:02,160 --> 00:27:04,367
You probably just have one drop.

692
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:07,123
- Plop.
- [all laugh]

693
00:27:09,160 --> 00:27:10,207
Bam, hush that.

694
00:27:11,320 --> 00:27:14,085
Oh... Oh...
Did it grow back?

695
00:27:14,160 --> 00:27:15,685
Grow back?

696
00:27:15,760 --> 00:27:17,762
I'm... I'm not a reptile, it doesn't...

697
00:27:17,840 --> 00:27:20,684
Well, he just told us
he ain't no anaconda.

698
00:27:20,760 --> 00:27:23,001
[all laughing]

699
00:27:23,120 --> 00:27:26,761
Though I almost felt bad when I saw
that little number two yellow pencil.

700
00:27:26,840 --> 00:27:28,808
He almost got lead poisoning.

701
00:27:28,880 --> 00:27:30,456
Daddy, you shouldn't have
pushed me off that roof.

702
00:27:30,480 --> 00:27:31,811
That's all I'm gonna say.

703
00:27:31,920 --> 00:27:33,684
You shouldn't have
pushed me off that roof.

704
00:27:33,760 --> 00:27:38,368
Again. Did you die, nigga?

705
00:27:38,440 --> 00:27:41,205
How many times I have to tell you?
Stop using that word.

706
00:27:41,280 --> 00:27:43,328
That is a horrible word.

707
00:27:43,400 --> 00:27:46,210
I don't even understand
why you keep using that word.

708
00:27:46,280 --> 00:27:48,328
Stop saying it, it's horrible!

709
00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:50,721
It's awful. All these people
use it in the music...

710
00:27:50,800 --> 00:27:52,136
All these kids
are in these clubs saying it.

711
00:27:52,160 --> 00:27:54,162
Stop saying that word!

712
00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:56,680
<i>Bitch ass.</i>

713
00:27:56,760 --> 00:27:58,808
Daddy, I'm warning you. Stop that...

714
00:27:58,880 --> 00:28:00,848
- Nigga.
- Okay, let's get this clear.

715
00:28:00,920 --> 00:28:03,241
Nobody is laying a hand
on my daughter, okay?

716
00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:07,086
Now, Madea, can you please not tell her
that I asked you to come by?

717
00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:08,969
Okay, can you please
just tell her that...

718
00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:10,081
Um...

719
00:28:10,160 --> 00:28:13,721
You were in the neighborhood,
and... And you stopped by.

720
00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:15,245
Okay? Can you do that?

721
00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:16,376
Yeah, he wants me to lie.
I'm not gonna lie.

722
00:28:16,400 --> 00:28:19,961
- I don't do that. I'm not a liar.
- Why? You scared of her?

723
00:28:20,040 --> 00:28:21,929
No, I'm not scared of her, but I just...

724
00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:24,082
I'm trying this approach
that I read in a book,

725
00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:26,401
that you and your kids should be...

726
00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:28,960
Buddies. Pals.
You should be friends.

727
00:28:29,040 --> 00:28:31,042
Friends? You ain't
supposed to be friends

728
00:28:31,120 --> 00:28:32,770
with your damn child, you the parent.

729
00:28:32,840 --> 00:28:34,171
Y'all not equals.

730
00:28:34,240 --> 00:28:36,527
What the hell you talkin' 'bout,
a friend? A friend?

731
00:28:36,600 --> 00:28:38,816
They have to listen to
what the hell you tell them to do.

732
00:28:38,840 --> 00:28:41,096
If they don't, they gotta
bounce they <i>ass</i> up out the house.

733
00:28:41,120 --> 00:28:43,441
Go pay they own mortgage.
Go pay they own rent.

734
00:28:43,520 --> 00:28:45,363
Go pay something, do you understand?

735
00:28:45,440 --> 00:28:46,601
Being a damn child friend.

736
00:28:46,680 --> 00:28:48,896
What the hell is wrong with you,
talkin' 'bout being your child friend.

737
00:28:48,920 --> 00:28:50,809
- That's stupid as hell!
- I hear you, okay?

738
00:28:50,880 --> 00:28:53,406
- [Tiffany] Dad, you haven't left yet?
- Um...

739
00:28:55,120 --> 00:28:56,804
- Hi.
- Hi.

740
00:28:56,920 --> 00:28:58,136
[whispering]
Remember what I said to you.

741
00:28:58,160 --> 00:28:59,366
That you stopped by.

742
00:29:01,880 --> 00:29:04,963
- What?
- Ms. Madea, how are you?

743
00:29:05,040 --> 00:29:06,896
Oh, I'm fine, how you doin', baby?
Good to see you.

744
00:29:06,920 --> 00:29:08,160
Good to see you, too.

745
00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:09,480
Who the hell is that?

746
00:29:09,600 --> 00:29:11,921
Mabel! That's the pastor's daughter.

747
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:13,764
Damn, you don't know that?

748
00:29:13,840 --> 00:29:15,456
Hell, even I know that
and I don't even go to church.

749
00:29:15,480 --> 00:29:17,096
You don't know that's
the pastor's daughter? Damn.

750
00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:18,963
Sinner! Devil.

751
00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:20,530
You know I don't know no pastor.

752
00:29:20,600 --> 00:29:22,136
She rolled up on me
like she know me, like...

753
00:29:22,160 --> 00:29:23,656
"Hey, how you doing?"
I don't know her like that.

754
00:29:23,680 --> 00:29:25,016
[Barn]
Mabel, everybody know you, honey.

755
00:29:25,040 --> 00:29:26,565
You been on the news so much.

756
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:29,325
Barn, you ain't gotta
tell people all my business.

757
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:30,925
Um, so, what are they doing here?

758
00:29:32,080 --> 00:29:33,491
- I have no idea.
- Oh.

759
00:29:33,560 --> 00:29:35,005
I just opened the door,

760
00:29:35,080 --> 00:29:36,605
- and barn! There was Madea.
- Really?

761
00:29:36,680 --> 00:29:37,761
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Oh.

762
00:29:37,880 --> 00:29:39,656
I opened the door, she said,
"Happy Haller-ween."

763
00:29:39,680 --> 00:29:41,256
You know how she says "haller"
and everything, so...

764
00:29:41,280 --> 00:29:44,170
Madea, what are you doing here?

765
00:29:44,240 --> 00:29:46,416
What the hell you mean
"what bring you by?" You called me.

766
00:29:46,440 --> 00:29:49,842
Oh. Oh. Um...

767
00:29:49,920 --> 00:29:51,160
I was in...

768
00:29:52,240 --> 00:29:53,526
The neigh...

769
00:29:53,600 --> 00:29:56,206
The neighborhood, and...

770
00:29:56,280 --> 00:29:58,965
I came... I was on my way to walk...

771
00:30:00,880 --> 00:30:05,283
I was in the neighborhood and I came by
to talk to your... Oh.

772
00:30:05,360 --> 00:30:07,362
To spend the... To stay the night.

773
00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:10,284
Oh, I was in the neighborhood,
I came by to stay the night, yeah.

774
00:30:10,360 --> 00:30:12,442
- That's too much to remember.
- Dad.

775
00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:15,205
What? I didn't...
I didn't know. I had no idea.

776
00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:17,169
I had no idea she was coming.

777
00:30:17,240 --> 00:30:18,969
- But isn't it great?
- No!

778
00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:20,376
Now you have somebody
to be here with you all night.

779
00:30:20,400 --> 00:30:22,926
- That's great.
- Happy Haller-ween.

780
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:25,082
- Thanks, Dad.
- [whispering] Thank you.

781
00:30:25,160 --> 00:30:27,891
Listen, thank you for
having us over here, Brian.

782
00:30:27,960 --> 00:30:29,176
- Okay?
- [Brian] I'll see you later.

783
00:30:29,200 --> 00:30:30,964
Hey, where the hell the liquor at?

784
00:30:31,040 --> 00:30:33,008
- [door shuts]
- I was so worried at my house.

785
00:30:33,080 --> 00:30:35,970
You know, I'm scared of everything.
Scared of everything.

786
00:30:36,040 --> 00:30:38,281
And this Halloween stuff
just give me the creeps.

787
00:30:38,360 --> 00:30:40,408
She don't like...
She don't like Haller-ween.

788
00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:41,970
Mmm-mmm. Don't like it at all.

789
00:30:42,040 --> 00:30:43,776
It just give me the creeps.
But now I'm all right.

790
00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:45,056
- 'Cause we all here together.
- All here together.

791
00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:46,809
- That's right.
- Together.

792
00:30:46,880 --> 00:30:48,296
Okay, well, I'm tired of talking
to you old people,

793
00:30:48,320 --> 00:30:50,004
so I'm gonna go upstairs.

794
00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:54,207
Nice to meet you!

795
00:30:56,040 --> 00:30:58,416
[Joe] There's something inside me
that want to go grab that girl

796
00:30:58,440 --> 00:31:00,966
and slap the shit out of her.
But I'm not gonna do it.

797
00:31:04,080 --> 00:31:05,844
Oh, it's getting late.

798
00:31:05,920 --> 00:31:07,843
We gotta hurry if we're gonna
catch this party.

799
00:31:08,120 --> 00:31:09,565
This makes me so mad.

800
00:31:09,680 --> 00:31:13,082
I can't believe my dad got all these
old people here to watch me.

801
00:31:13,160 --> 00:31:14,730
Oh, it's not that bad.

802
00:31:14,800 --> 00:31:17,041
You know, Ms. Barn
kinda reminds me of my grandma.

803
00:31:17,120 --> 00:31:19,202
She always gets
really scared on Halloween.

804
00:31:19,280 --> 00:31:21,487
Starts talkin' 'bout
the devil and what not.

805
00:31:21,560 --> 00:31:23,085
But then she just goes to sleep early.

806
00:31:23,160 --> 00:31:24,924
She just wants the day to be over with.

807
00:31:26,520 --> 00:31:28,522
Wait, no, that's it.

808
00:31:28,600 --> 00:31:30,967
We're gonna trick them
into going to bed early.

809
00:31:31,040 --> 00:31:33,441
Trick them?
What do you mean, trick them?

810
00:31:33,520 --> 00:31:36,364
We're gonna scare the hell out of 'em.
Okay, listen, Aday.

811
00:31:36,440 --> 00:31:38,522
When I tell you to press this,
you press it, 'kay?

812
00:31:40,240 --> 00:31:41,651
Is this a bomb or something?

813
00:31:41,720 --> 00:31:43,609
No, it's not a bomb,
it controls the lights.

814
00:31:43,680 --> 00:31:45,250
- Oh, thank God.
- Come on.

815
00:31:45,320 --> 00:31:47,016
I thought we were blowing
old people up today.

816
00:31:47,040 --> 00:31:48,041
No.

817
00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:49,720
I'm tryin' to make it
to heaven, Tiffany.

818
00:31:51,520 --> 00:31:53,568
They got a nice wood-burning fire.

819
00:31:53,680 --> 00:31:57,207
Yeah, people don't have no
wood-burning fireplaces no more.

820
00:31:57,280 --> 00:31:59,282
Everything's gas now, these children.

821
00:31:59,360 --> 00:32:02,091
We done got gas on everything.

822
00:32:02,160 --> 00:32:04,003
- Did good.
- [Tiffany] Hey.

823
00:32:04,080 --> 00:32:06,242
Look what I brought home from school.

824
00:32:06,360 --> 00:32:08,124
What... What the hell is that?

825
00:32:08,200 --> 00:32:10,009
It's a ghost board, Grandpa.

826
00:32:10,080 --> 00:32:12,242
Get that... Get that
on the hell on out of here.

827
00:32:12,320 --> 00:32:13,481
[Barn]
No, ma'am. Uh-uh.

828
00:32:13,560 --> 00:32:14,656
Get that devilment out of here.

829
00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:15,681
[Madea] Right.

830
00:32:15,760 --> 00:32:19,082
No, it's fun.
It's how you communicate with the dead.

831
00:32:21,560 --> 00:32:23,256
You heard her.
Get it on out of here, honey.

832
00:32:23,280 --> 00:32:25,726
We don't play with stuff like that.
Get that up out of here.

833
00:32:25,800 --> 00:32:27,211
No, it's fun!

834
00:32:27,280 --> 00:32:30,090
I'ma tell you right now, if you open it,
that's what you're gonna be.

835
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:31,696
Dead. You're gonna be
on the other side.

836
00:32:31,720 --> 00:32:33,056
We not playing with stuff
like that, honey.

837
00:32:33,080 --> 00:32:35,480
We don't play with stuff like that.
Give me... Put this down.

838
00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:40,416
What is that that fell out of the thing?

839
00:32:40,440 --> 00:32:41,976
What is that? I don't touch this stuff.

840
00:32:42,000 --> 00:32:44,080
I grew up in New Orleans,
they got voodoo everywhere.

841
00:32:45,120 --> 00:32:46,167
No.

842
00:32:47,480 --> 00:32:49,801
It's a card. It says, "Death."

843
00:32:53,720 --> 00:32:55,449
Oh, no.

844
00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:57,488
Ain't no "oh, no."
I'ma tell you right now.

845
00:32:57,560 --> 00:32:58,736
See, y'all children
don't understand.

846
00:32:58,760 --> 00:33:00,256
Let me make this
perfectly clear to you, honey.

847
00:33:00,280 --> 00:33:01,406
You don't be playing around.

848
00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:02,696
Keep playing with the devil,
he gonna show up.

849
00:33:02,720 --> 00:33:05,610
Yeah, he gonna show up. He's sittin'
right there in front of you.

850
00:33:06,640 --> 00:33:08,210
[exhales]

851
00:33:08,280 --> 00:33:10,400
I tell you right now,
don't play with me, little girl.

852
00:33:10,440 --> 00:33:11,496
That's what you gonna look like,

853
00:33:11,520 --> 00:33:13,648
just like that damn skeleton
on that card.

854
00:33:13,760 --> 00:33:15,603
Doin' a pirouette.
You understand? Go to bed.

855
00:33:16,520 --> 00:33:21,128
You don't understand.
This card comes from Mr. Wilson.

856
00:33:21,200 --> 00:33:24,727
The man that died
in this house on Halloween.

857
00:33:24,800 --> 00:33:28,771
He killed his entire family and put
all of their bodies in the attic.

858
00:33:28,840 --> 00:33:35,007
And it's said that every Halloween
he comes back to take a life.

859
00:33:35,080 --> 00:33:38,402
And the only place he doesn't go
in this house are the bedrooms.

860
00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:40,642
Because that's where
the priests used to sleep

861
00:33:40,720 --> 00:33:42,404
when this house was a monastery.

862
00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:44,244
- Whoa.
- I know.

863
00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:48,609
So we should all go to sleep.
It's safer there, anyways.

864
00:33:48,680 --> 00:33:51,365
The ghosts come out at midnight.

865
00:33:51,440 --> 00:33:54,171
Okay. Time for me to go.

866
00:33:54,240 --> 00:33:55,736
- [Madea] Barn.
- I gotta get out of here.

867
00:33:55,760 --> 00:33:57,524
Bam, hold the hell on.

868
00:33:57,600 --> 00:33:59,090
- Barn.
- What?

869
00:33:59,160 --> 00:34:00,491
What the hell's wrong with you?

870
00:34:00,600 --> 00:34:02,409
Mabel, did you hear what she just said?

871
00:34:02,480 --> 00:34:03,641
- Barn.
- What?

872
00:34:03,720 --> 00:34:05,324
You forgot your canes.

873
00:34:05,400 --> 00:34:06,765
- On!
- On!

874
00:34:07,320 --> 00:34:08,765
Joe!

875
00:34:08,840 --> 00:34:11,241
But ain't God good?
I don't even need my canes, Mabel.

876
00:34:11,360 --> 00:34:12,691
- [Madea] Sit down!
- Mabel.

877
00:34:12,760 --> 00:34:13,976
Hell, we been helpin' you for days,

878
00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:15,416
and you sittin' there actin' like
somethin' wrong with you.

879
00:34:15,440 --> 00:34:16,776
Ain't nothing wrong with you. Sit down!

880
00:34:16,800 --> 00:34:17,801
Yes.

881
00:34:17,880 --> 00:34:19,376
This girl ain't doin'
nothin' but sitting here lyin'.

882
00:34:19,400 --> 00:34:21,243
No, I'm not.
I'm telling the truth!

883
00:34:21,320 --> 00:34:23,576
Girl, if you don't get up out
of here with that devilment,

884
00:34:23,600 --> 00:34:26,080
I mean, you better get to steppin'.

885
00:34:26,160 --> 00:34:27,844
I'm telling you. I'm going to bed.

886
00:34:27,960 --> 00:34:31,407
'Cause after 10:00, strange things
start happening in this house.

887
00:34:31,480 --> 00:34:34,165
[whispering]
Strange things.

888
00:34:34,240 --> 00:34:35,616
No. I ain't gonna even be
able to do this.

889
00:34:35,640 --> 00:34:38,803
I can't I got...
That's gonna blow my high.

890
00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:41,486
High... You smoke marijuana?

891
00:34:41,600 --> 00:34:44,080
I got a prescription!

892
00:34:44,160 --> 00:34:46,606
You, little girl,
stay in a child's place.

893
00:34:46,680 --> 00:34:49,331
Mabel, I gotta get outta here.
I'm scared, and I gotta

894
00:34:49,440 --> 00:34:51,176
- get outta here, now!
- Calm down, Bam. Bam!

895
00:34:51,200 --> 00:34:52,565
Calm the hell down.

896
00:34:52,640 --> 00:34:54,244
This girl is lyin'.

897
00:34:54,360 --> 00:34:56,681
I'm gonna go to bed.
Don't let the ghosts get you.

898
00:34:56,760 --> 00:34:58,125
Be on outta here.

899
00:34:58,240 --> 00:35:00,971
She lyin'. Hold on!

900
00:35:01,760 --> 00:35:02,921
What? Oh.

901
00:35:04,960 --> 00:35:06,610
[all screaming]

902
00:35:10,520 --> 00:35:11,760
I'ma fuck you up!

903
00:35:13,400 --> 00:35:14,890
What the hell was that?

904
00:35:14,960 --> 00:35:16,325
I'm sorry.

905
00:35:16,400 --> 00:35:17,736
[Madea]
What happened to the lights?

906
00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:19,569
Help me, Jesus.

907
00:35:19,640 --> 00:35:21,165
[whispering]
That was Mr. Wilson.

908
00:35:21,240 --> 00:35:23,336
[Madea] Girl, get out of here.
You ain't doin' nothin' but lyin'.

909
00:35:23,360 --> 00:35:24,885
Hell, that was just...
That was just...

910
00:35:24,960 --> 00:35:26,456
That was just...
That was just power...

911
00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:29,689
Power... P... That was just...
That was just the power acting up.

912
00:35:29,760 --> 00:35:31,489
- Okay, well, goodnight.
- Go to bed!

913
00:35:31,560 --> 00:35:32,776
[stuttering]
Go to bed, girl, hell.

914
00:35:32,800 --> 00:35:34,211
All right.

915
00:35:34,280 --> 00:35:36,203
[stuttering]
Sittin' there tellin' all them lies.

916
00:35:36,320 --> 00:35:37,810
- Come on, Aday.
- I'm scared.

917
00:35:37,880 --> 00:35:39,882
- Come on!
- Okay, okay.

918
00:35:41,400 --> 00:35:43,323
Dea, Dea, I'm scared.

919
00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:45,368
- [Hattie] Me too.
- Bam, calm the hell down.

920
00:35:45,440 --> 00:35:46,487
Calm the hell down.

921
00:35:51,800 --> 00:35:52,801
[tapping]

922
00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:01,526
- Tiffany, come on!
- It's time to go.

923
00:36:01,600 --> 00:36:03,682
Shh! Don't wake the old people!

924
00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:10,526
Okay, gonna fix the bed.

925
00:36:10,600 --> 00:36:12,616
- Fix the bed. Pull this down.
- What are we doing to the bed?

926
00:36:12,640 --> 00:36:14,256
We're gonna make it look like
we're sleeping in here.

927
00:36:14,280 --> 00:36:15,930
Oh.

928
00:36:16,240 --> 00:36:17,969
- Like a body?
- Yeah, like a body.

929
00:36:18,040 --> 00:36:19,201
Okay.

930
00:36:19,320 --> 00:36:22,563
Wait, over there. Here. Okay.

931
00:36:22,640 --> 00:36:24,244
That looks like you been eatin' good.

932
00:36:24,320 --> 00:36:26,800
Wait, hold on.

933
00:36:26,880 --> 00:36:28,530
Okay. Let's sneak down the back stairs.

934
00:36:28,600 --> 00:36:30,887
- Oh, I don't know about this.
- Come on.

935
00:36:32,440 --> 00:36:34,044
- Close the door.
- Okay.

936
00:36:36,920 --> 00:36:37,921
Good Lord.

937
00:36:54,880 --> 00:36:55,881
Hmm.

938
00:37:10,040 --> 00:37:13,522
This damn girl has snuck up
out of this damn house!

939
00:37:13,600 --> 00:37:15,250
Bam, y'all ain't gonna believe this.

940
00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:16,696
Y'all ain't gonna believe this at all.

941
00:37:16,720 --> 00:37:18,085
[Hattie] What that, Ma?

942
00:37:18,160 --> 00:37:19,656
That girl has snuck up
out of this house.

943
00:37:19,680 --> 00:37:20,681
- Uh-uh.
- No!

944
00:37:20,800 --> 00:37:22,564
Yes, she did.

945
00:37:22,640 --> 00:37:24,005
Well, where's she going to?

946
00:37:24,080 --> 00:37:25,536
Probably over there to that frat party.

947
00:37:25,560 --> 00:37:26,800
I knew it.

948
00:37:26,880 --> 00:37:30,566
You talkin' 'bout over there where
all them fine, sexy college men's be?

949
00:37:30,640 --> 00:37:32,051
Hattie...

950
00:37:32,120 --> 00:37:33,645
Let's ride.

951
00:37:33,720 --> 00:37:34,926
Come on, Joe.

952
00:37:35,000 --> 00:37:37,571
No, you go on, I'm gonna stay here
and pray for her safe return.

953
00:37:37,640 --> 00:37:39,529
Hey, hey. Hey, come here, come here.

954
00:37:39,600 --> 00:37:41,409
- Joe, what is it?
- Come here.

955
00:37:41,480 --> 00:37:42,811
- Come here.
- What is it?

956
00:37:44,560 --> 00:37:46,767
- Let me hold one of them...
- Joe.

957
00:37:46,840 --> 00:37:48,376
Why you gotta be all stingy
'cause you legal, baby?

958
00:37:48,400 --> 00:37:49,401
Come on, help me out.

959
00:37:49,480 --> 00:37:52,962
Joe, I got a prescription for this here.
I don't have any for you.

960
00:37:53,080 --> 00:37:55,481
The Lord gonna bless you, you share.

961
00:37:55,560 --> 00:37:57,801
[groans]
You make me so sick!

962
00:37:57,920 --> 00:38:00,321
Here, Joe. This... You owe me.

963
00:38:00,400 --> 00:38:04,041
All right. When you come back,
I'll tap that ass for you.

964
00:38:04,880 --> 00:38:08,089
In that case, you gonna be payin' me.

965
00:38:11,120 --> 00:38:12,770
Is it like that?

966
00:38:14,080 --> 00:38:19,723
Go ahead on, then. I'll be here,
waitin' for y'all to get back.

967
00:38:19,800 --> 00:38:24,362
Prayin' for her safe return.
That the Lord will bless her.

968
00:38:24,440 --> 00:38:25,885
Hey, I need a lighter!

969
00:38:25,960 --> 00:38:27,849
[muffled music playing]

970
00:38:27,920 --> 00:38:29,649
- [tires screeching]
- [engine backfiring]

971
00:38:32,640 --> 00:38:34,324
[Barn]
Wait, Mabel, stop it!

972
00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:36,084
[Madea]
I know, I know, damn well...

973
00:38:36,160 --> 00:38:37,764
Let's get out of the car here.

974
00:38:37,840 --> 00:38:39,656
[Hattie] You didn't have to be
jacking my neck like that.

975
00:38:39,680 --> 00:38:41,967
Damn! What, it backfired.

976
00:38:42,040 --> 00:38:43,644
You know my brakes is bad, Hattie.

977
00:38:43,720 --> 00:38:45,245
Hey, what the hell does that mean?

978
00:38:45,320 --> 00:38:47,926
Uh... Lord, have mercy.
Look at these children.

979
00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:50,480
Hurry up, Bam, get out the car.

980
00:38:50,560 --> 00:38:53,689
Look at this.
Look at this.

981
00:38:53,760 --> 00:38:56,764
[Hattie] Look at all these fine,
sexy college men in here.

982
00:38:56,840 --> 00:38:59,002
Girl, leave...
Hattie, leave them children alone.

983
00:38:59,080 --> 00:39:02,209
What, Ma? You know I don't mind buying
two or three college books for these...

984
00:39:02,280 --> 00:39:03,776
Well, somebody gonna throw
a damn book at you.

985
00:39:03,800 --> 00:39:04,976
Leave these little boys alone.

986
00:39:05,000 --> 00:39:06,096
[Barn]
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

987
00:39:06,120 --> 00:39:07,770
What the hell is that?

988
00:39:07,840 --> 00:39:09,569
It's my costume, I'm Peter Pan.

989
00:39:09,640 --> 00:39:10,880
- [laughs]
- Duh!

990
00:39:10,960 --> 00:39:12,530
She said she pissed her pants!

991
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:14,921
You know she said
she pissed her pants!

992
00:39:15,000 --> 00:39:16,525
I didn't piss in my pants!

993
00:39:16,600 --> 00:39:18,016
Don't do that
in front of these children!

994
00:39:18,040 --> 00:39:19,376
- Get on in the house.
- I said I'm Peter Pan!

995
00:39:19,400 --> 00:39:21,016
Go on up in there
and help me find this girl.

996
00:39:21,040 --> 00:39:22,371
All this foolishness.

997
00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:24,886
Yo-ho-yo-yo-yo-yo!
Sick costume, bro!

998
00:39:24,960 --> 00:39:27,406
What? What is wrong with you?

999
00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:29,050
Dude.

1000
00:39:29,120 --> 00:39:30,406
- Whoa!
- Boy, what the hell?

1001
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:32,767
[all exclaim]

1002
00:39:32,840 --> 00:39:34,922
Put your hand on my damn breast again.

1003
00:39:35,000 --> 00:39:36,764
I just wanted to say
it looked real!

1004
00:39:36,840 --> 00:39:38,968
Like, saggy and lumpy...

1005
00:39:39,040 --> 00:39:40,087
But real.

1006
00:39:40,160 --> 00:39:41,810
[man] Hey, let me see 'em.

1007
00:39:41,880 --> 00:39:43,120
Say What?

1008
00:39:43,200 --> 00:39:45,726
- Show us your boobs, please?
- You got some beads or something?

1009
00:39:45,800 --> 00:39:47,736
You gonna put some dollar bills
up in these breasts?

1010
00:39:47,760 --> 00:39:49,967
- No, we just wanna see 'em.
- We just like boobs.

1011
00:39:50,040 --> 00:39:51,849
- What? You wanna see 'em.
- Yeah!

1012
00:39:51,920 --> 00:39:53,331
Boobs! Let's see boobs.

1013
00:39:53,400 --> 00:39:54,776
- You wanna see 'em?
- [man] Yeah, twin peaks.

1014
00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:56,165
You wanna see 'em?

1015
00:39:56,240 --> 00:39:57,446
[boys groan]

1016
00:39:57,520 --> 00:39:58,851
- Yes.
- Wait.

1017
00:39:58,920 --> 00:40:00,843
Yes. Behold, paradise.

1018
00:40:00,960 --> 00:40:03,566
Right before your eyes.
[laughs]

1019
00:40:03,640 --> 00:40:05,961
How'd you get it to look like
real skin though, man?

1020
00:40:06,040 --> 00:40:07,136
Touch 'em.
Touch 'em. Touch 'em.

1021
00:40:07,160 --> 00:40:08,446
Look at those veins.

1022
00:40:08,520 --> 00:40:10,216
- Nipples and everything.
- Such intricate...

1023
00:40:10,240 --> 00:40:11,446
See how warm?

1024
00:40:11,520 --> 00:40:12,856
How'd you get the veins to look...

1025
00:40:12,880 --> 00:40:14,882
- See how warm?
- And they're wrinkly.

1026
00:40:14,960 --> 00:40:16,246
See how warm?

1027
00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:17,970
- I think this is real.
- Oh, no, no, no.

1028
00:40:18,040 --> 00:40:19,496
- No, those are real.
- Like saggy sandbags.

1029
00:40:19,520 --> 00:40:20,576
- I think I'm gonna be sick.
- [9898]

1030
00:40:20,600 --> 00:40:21,776
- I need a drink.
- Oh, my God.

1031
00:40:21,800 --> 00:40:24,690
Move, move, move! Oh, my God.

1032
00:40:24,760 --> 00:40:27,570
Grabbin' on me, hell,
I used to get dollar bills for that!

1033
00:40:27,640 --> 00:40:29,449
I'll make it rain up in this piece.

1034
00:40:29,520 --> 00:40:32,016
Barn, Hattie, y'all wait for me.
Get the hell on out the damn way.

1035
00:40:32,040 --> 00:40:34,964
Damn chicken! And a banana.

1036
00:40:35,040 --> 00:40:36,936
What the hell, you waitin'?
You wanna see this ass?

1037
00:40:36,960 --> 00:40:39,645
Come here, I'm gonna show you this ass!
Come see it!

1038
00:40:39,720 --> 00:40:41,768
Come on back here!
Where the hell they run to?

1039
00:40:41,840 --> 00:40:44,161
- [music playing]
- Hattie, Bam, where y'all at?

1040
00:40:44,240 --> 00:40:46,925
Mabel! It's a lot to look at in here.

1041
00:40:47,000 --> 00:40:48,968
It sure the hell is, it sure is.

1042
00:40:49,040 --> 00:40:50,883
- [Hattie] Damn!
- Excuse me, miss... [yelps]

1043
00:40:50,960 --> 00:40:52,041
Mabel!

1044
00:40:52,120 --> 00:40:54,964
This here is a costume party.

1045
00:40:55,040 --> 00:40:56,690
I don't know
if that was a costume, hell.

1046
00:40:56,760 --> 00:40:59,445
We gonna have to look up under
every one of 'em till we find 'em.

1047
00:40:59,560 --> 00:41:01,847
Okay, great, I don't mind doing that.

1048
00:41:03,680 --> 00:41:05,967
Hattie, Hattie. Under the face!

1049
00:41:06,040 --> 00:41:07,530
Up under the face!

1050
00:41:07,600 --> 00:41:09,762
You ain't gonna find her up
under his pants.

1051
00:41:09,840 --> 00:41:12,571
You don't know what
she come as! She could be...

1052
00:41:12,640 --> 00:41:15,246
She at a costume party,
she could have come as anything!

1053
00:41:15,320 --> 00:41:17,641
Wait a minute. [sniffs]

1054
00:41:19,600 --> 00:41:22,251
Yeah, there it is. Mabel,
I'm gonna look upstairs.

1055
00:41:22,320 --> 00:41:24,800
Bam, look around down here.

1056
00:41:24,880 --> 00:41:26,736
Hattie, you go on up there
'cause you can handle it.

1057
00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:28,171
This girl, she still fiendin'.

1058
00:41:28,240 --> 00:41:29,536
And I'm gonna go
and look around down here.

1059
00:41:29,560 --> 00:41:30,656
- Go on and look around.
- Okay, Ma.

1060
00:41:30,680 --> 00:41:31,966
<i>'</i>
- <i>I</i> got...

1061
00:41:32,040 --> 00:41:33,769
- [cheering]
- [music continues playing]

1062
00:41:37,080 --> 00:41:39,481
Tiffany! Excuse me,
excuse me, honey. Excuse me.

1063
00:41:39,600 --> 00:41:41,568
Is that what you call dancing?

1064
00:41:41,640 --> 00:41:44,644
Yeah, some of y'all need
some <i>masks</i> on for real.

1065
00:41:44,720 --> 00:41:47,769
Why y'all children
up in here lookin' like hoes?

1066
00:41:47,840 --> 00:41:49,569
Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me.

1067
00:41:49,640 --> 00:41:51,563
What the hell y'all got on?
Lord, have mercy.

1068
00:41:51,640 --> 00:41:53,256
Do your mama know
you're dressing like this?

1069
00:41:53,280 --> 00:41:54,725
She picked out my outfit.

1070
00:41:54,800 --> 00:41:56,609
Your mama picked out your outfit?

1071
00:41:56,680 --> 00:41:58,045
- Duh.
- Yeah.

1072
00:41:58,160 --> 00:42:00,640
Damn. She must be
one of them housewives.

1073
00:42:00,720 --> 00:42:03,405
Listen, honey, I'm looking for Tiffany.

1074
00:42:03,480 --> 00:42:04,527
Do y'all know a Tiffany?

1075
00:42:04,600 --> 00:42:06,841
Uh... No. We don't.

1076
00:42:06,960 --> 00:42:08,166
Who's looking for her?

1077
00:42:08,240 --> 00:42:10,376
Who looking for her? I'm her aunt,
and I'm looking for her.

1078
00:42:10,400 --> 00:42:12,801
I know she up in here somewhere.
Do y'all know her?

1079
00:42:12,880 --> 00:42:14,769
- No. We don't know her.
- No. Sorry.

1080
00:42:14,840 --> 00:42:17,002
Excuse me, do y'all know a Tiffany?

1081
00:42:17,080 --> 00:42:18,923
- No, I don't.
- Okay. Yeah, okay. Bye.

1082
00:42:19,000 --> 00:42:21,207
Tiffany! Tiffany.

1083
00:42:24,840 --> 00:42:27,002
- Dude, your aunt's here.
- What?

1084
00:42:27,080 --> 00:42:28,491
Yeah, she's right over there.

1085
00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:29,561
Oh, no.

1086
00:42:30,680 --> 00:42:33,490
- We need to go.
- Where's your back door?

1087
00:42:33,560 --> 00:42:34,891
Jonathan got this, ladies.

1088
00:42:34,960 --> 00:42:38,407
Listen, Dino. Take her to my room,
and take Aday to yours.

1089
00:42:38,480 --> 00:42:40,080
- Bingo. Let's go. Come on.
- No, no. no.

1090
00:42:40,160 --> 00:42:41,376
Shouldn't we stay together?
Don't make me go with him.

1091
00:42:41,400 --> 00:42:42,616
I mean, if y'all get
down like that, let's go.

1092
00:42:42,640 --> 00:42:44,130
- Have fun!
- Take your costumes off.

1093
00:42:44,200 --> 00:42:46,680
Take your costumes off, too.
They won't recognize you that way.

1094
00:42:46,720 --> 00:42:49,041
Lord, y'all little skinny asses...
Get out the way, hell.

1095
00:42:49,120 --> 00:42:50,690
- Tiffany!
- Well, well, well.

1096
00:42:50,760 --> 00:42:52,649
Welcome to my party!
My name is Jonathan,

1097
00:42:52,720 --> 00:42:55,041
the <i>El</i> Presidente
of this here fraterni-tay.

1098
00:42:55,120 --> 00:42:58,442
- [laughs]
- Are you on that shit? Calm down.

1099
00:42:58,520 --> 00:43:01,056
Hey, listen, son, do you know a Tiffany?
I'm looking for Tiffany.

1100
00:43:01,080 --> 00:43:02,491
- Oh, Tiffany.
- Yes.

1101
00:43:02,600 --> 00:43:03,696
- Oh, about this tall?
- Right.

1102
00:43:03,720 --> 00:43:04,801
- Black hair?
- Yes.

1103
00:43:04,880 --> 00:43:06,723
I've never seen her!
[laughing]

1104
00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:08,529
[Horse] Hey, got milk?

1105
00:43:08,600 --> 00:43:10,045
- [horse grunts]
- [crowd exclaims]

1106
00:43:10,120 --> 00:43:11,849
- Yo, chill!
- Do it again.

1107
00:43:11,920 --> 00:43:14,400
I ain't got no damn milk,
but I got some bullets.

1108
00:43:14,480 --> 00:43:17,131
Ma'am, ma'am, I didn't know
it was like that. Chill.

1109
00:43:17,240 --> 00:43:18,571
You're telling me this is a lady?

1110
00:43:18,640 --> 00:43:21,610
Yes! And she's looking
for someone named Tiffany,

1111
00:43:21,680 --> 00:43:23,205
but we've never seen a Tiffany.

1112
00:43:23,280 --> 00:43:24,486
[laughs]

1113
00:43:24,560 --> 00:43:25,721
No, no, we haven't.

1114
00:43:25,800 --> 00:43:30,761
Yo, yo, everybody, listen up!
Listen up. Chaz, what's up, man?

1115
00:43:30,840 --> 00:43:33,491
How you doin'? Yo, announcement.

1116
00:43:33,560 --> 00:43:38,600
Big announcement. It's time for
the special guest of the evening.

1117
00:43:38,720 --> 00:43:41,087
Give it up for Tyga!

1118
00:43:41,160 --> 00:43:43,481
[all cheering]

1119
00:43:43,560 --> 00:43:46,928
We about to get turnt up!
Let's see everybody hands up like this!

1120
00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:48,056
[hip hop music on speakers]

1121
00:43:48,080 --> 00:43:50,686
- Son.
- What?

1122
00:43:50,760 --> 00:43:51,761
- Hands up.
- [Madea] Son.

1123
00:43:51,840 --> 00:43:55,162
We can't hear you! [laughs]

1124
00:43:55,240 --> 00:43:56,765
[singing rap song]

1125
00:44:04,120 --> 00:44:05,326
[crowd cheering]

1126
00:44:28,080 --> 00:44:29,400
- [crows cheers]
- [man] Oh, yeah!

1127
00:44:40,640 --> 00:44:42,404
Turn this music...
Turn this noise...

1128
00:44:43,120 --> 00:44:44,167
[exhales]

1129
00:44:44,240 --> 00:44:47,961
Mabel, did you find her?

1130
00:44:48,080 --> 00:44:50,845
Barn, you been drinkin'?
No, I didn't find her.

1131
00:44:50,920 --> 00:44:53,764
And they got this rap...
I can't stand this music.

1132
00:44:53,840 --> 00:44:57,561
But, Mabel, if you can't stand it,
why your body...

1133
00:44:57,640 --> 00:45:00,484
Why your body moving like that?
[laughs]

1134
00:45:00,960 --> 00:45:02,530
That's that ho, that's my bottom half.

1135
00:45:02,600 --> 00:45:05,046
Every time it hear this music,
it just wanna drop.

1136
00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:06,296
That's the ho from back in the day

1137
00:45:06,320 --> 00:45:07,731
- coming out of me.
- Yeah.

1138
00:45:07,800 --> 00:45:09,136
[sing-songy]
I don't like this rap.

1139
00:45:09,160 --> 00:45:11,288
I don't like this.
I don't, I don't like this.

1140
00:45:11,360 --> 00:45:12,885
[rapping]

1141
00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:16,764
[singing rap song]

1142
00:45:16,840 --> 00:45:17,841
Mabel!

1143
00:45:20,840 --> 00:45:23,081
I get to get the hell outta here.
My ho coming out.

1144
00:45:23,160 --> 00:45:24,650
[man] Go, granny on the mic!

1145
00:45:24,720 --> 00:45:27,769
<i>♪ Hey, put your hands up!
♪ Put your hands up!</i>

1146
00:45:29,080 --> 00:45:30,684
Hattie! What the hell you doing?

1147
00:45:30,760 --> 00:45:32,922
Get down!

1148
00:45:33,040 --> 00:45:36,806
That's it. That's it.
That's it. Move! That's it.

1149
00:45:36,920 --> 00:45:39,241
<i>♪ I give you all
the little baby you want</i>

1150
00:45:41,040 --> 00:45:42,963
<i>♪ Hey! Put your hands up!</i>

1151
00:45:43,040 --> 00:45:44,963
[music turns off]

1152
00:45:45,040 --> 00:45:46,371
Hold the hell on!

1153
00:45:46,440 --> 00:45:47,776
- [Barn] Wait a minute.
- Hold the hell on.

1154
00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:51,805
I just unplugged the damn music.
And I'ma tell you right now.

1155
00:45:51,880 --> 00:45:55,805
Let me make this very, very, perfectly
clear to all of y'all up in here.

1156
00:45:55,880 --> 00:45:58,281
I have been nice,
and I have been lookin' for Tiffany.

1157
00:45:58,400 --> 00:45:59,811
Y'all better present Tiffany.

1158
00:45:59,880 --> 00:46:05,011
You got 32.1 of a second
to present her to me right now.

1159
00:46:05,080 --> 00:46:07,651
I don't give a damn if Tyga upset here.

1160
00:46:07,720 --> 00:46:09,376
- I don't give a damn...
- [man] Okay. That's it!

1161
00:46:09,400 --> 00:46:11,080
- That is it!
- [all chanting] Get her out!

1162
00:46:11,120 --> 00:46:12,724
Get her outta here!

1163
00:46:12,800 --> 00:46:14,086
I said get her out of here!

1164
00:46:14,160 --> 00:46:16,128
Wait! Wait!

1165
00:46:16,200 --> 00:46:17,440
[howls]

1166
00:46:19,040 --> 00:46:20,326
[all cheering]

1167
00:46:23,960 --> 00:46:25,371
[laughing]

1168
00:46:27,000 --> 00:46:28,001
Bring that beat back!

1169
00:46:28,080 --> 00:46:30,003
<i>Throw her old ass out!</i>

1170
00:46:30,080 --> 00:46:31,840
[Madea] Barn, what the hell's
wrong with you?

1171
00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:35,361
Come on, let's go to the damn house.

1172
00:46:35,440 --> 00:46:37,363
[indistinct chattering]

1173
00:46:42,880 --> 00:46:45,326
All right. She's gone.
Will she call the police?

1174
00:46:45,400 --> 00:46:49,007
No. She's got lots of warrants.
She's crazy but she's not that crazy.

1175
00:46:49,080 --> 00:46:52,368
Look, Tiff, we love you and Aday, but...

1176
00:46:52,440 --> 00:46:54,329
We just don't like the drama.

1177
00:46:54,400 --> 00:46:57,051
Well, I'm sorry that my dad is so lame.

1178
00:46:57,120 --> 00:46:59,407
Well, we just can't hang out
and have this happen again.

1179
00:46:59,480 --> 00:47:01,881
Well, it won't happen again.
I promise.

1180
00:47:01,960 --> 00:47:04,327
This is why we said that,
you know, you shouldn't come.

1181
00:47:04,400 --> 00:47:06,323
It's 'cause your dad's
gonna flip, dude.

1182
00:47:06,400 --> 00:47:09,136
And, you know, now Jonathan is missing
his party, it's kind of unfair.

1183
00:47:09,160 --> 00:47:10,207
Yeah.

1184
00:47:10,280 --> 00:47:12,203
Well, don't worry about Jonathan.

1185
00:47:12,280 --> 00:47:13,327
I'll make it up to him.

1186
00:47:15,320 --> 00:47:16,890
- Oh. All right.
- Okay.

1187
00:47:16,960 --> 00:47:19,042
- Mmm-hmm. Okay. All right.
- Have fun.

1188
00:47:19,120 --> 00:47:20,167
Bye.

1189
00:47:23,240 --> 00:47:26,289
Listen, I'm so sorry about all of this.

1190
00:47:26,360 --> 00:47:28,442
Yo, Tiffany, it's all good,

1191
00:47:28,520 --> 00:47:30,727
but are you sure she's not
gonna call the police?

1192
00:47:30,800 --> 00:47:34,088
Yeah, I'm sure. I'm surprised
they even left the house.

1193
00:47:34,160 --> 00:47:37,687
I was telling them this story
about how the house is haunted.

1194
00:47:37,760 --> 00:47:39,136
Oh, you should have
seen their eyes.

1195
00:47:39,160 --> 00:47:41,527
They were, like, scared.

1196
00:47:41,600 --> 00:47:44,365
- Really?
- Yes.

1197
00:47:44,440 --> 00:47:47,205
Oh! All right. Tell me more.

1198
00:47:50,800 --> 00:47:53,883
Oh, Lord.
I think I want to go home.

1199
00:47:53,960 --> 00:47:55,849
Yeah, me too. Home run.

1200
00:47:55,920 --> 00:47:59,242
Knock you out the park.
I'm talking fifth base.

1201
00:47:59,320 --> 00:48:01,800
Is there even a fifth base?
What is that?

1202
00:48:01,880 --> 00:48:03,882
What are you freaking out for?
Come on.

1203
00:48:03,960 --> 00:48:05,803
I'm not. What do you mean?

1204
00:48:05,880 --> 00:48:08,042
We'll get weird on each other.
What do you say?

1205
00:48:08,120 --> 00:48:09,929
I'm just 17.

1206
00:48:10,520 --> 00:48:14,161
- You're 17?
- Yes.

1207
00:48:14,320 --> 00:48:16,129
Years old?

1208
00:48:16,200 --> 00:48:17,964
- Yeah.
- In human years.

1209
00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:19,521
Yes.

1210
00:48:21,400 --> 00:48:23,004
[screaming]

1211
00:48:24,920 --> 00:48:28,970
This girl is 17!
Seventeen years old!

1212
00:48:29,040 --> 00:48:31,008
[Dino howling]

1213
00:48:32,320 --> 00:48:34,448
I'm mad as hell.
I'm mad as hell!

1214
00:48:34,520 --> 00:48:37,046
Gonna throw me down in them bushes,
and Bam, you sitting there,

1215
00:48:37,120 --> 00:48:38,536
sitting there getting' high
with them damn boys.

1216
00:48:38,560 --> 00:48:39,856
And Barn, you wasn't even
gonna help me?

1217
00:48:39,880 --> 00:48:42,850
You supposed to be fightin' for me.
Y'all was supposed to have my back. Oh!

1218
00:48:42,920 --> 00:48:44,081
Mabel, I got your back.

1219
00:48:44,160 --> 00:48:47,004
I always have, always had your back,
but I'm high, Mabel.

1220
00:48:47,080 --> 00:48:48,856
Somebody needs to call the police,
that's all I know.

1221
00:48:48,880 --> 00:48:50,291
Somebody need to call the po-po.

1222
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:52,056
You so damn worried about her,
you call 'em.

1223
00:48:52,080 --> 00:48:53,445
Hell, I'm trying to sleep.

1224
00:48:53,520 --> 00:48:55,016
Oh, no, I can't do that, I got warrants.

1225
00:48:55,040 --> 00:48:59,409
- Mabel, call them anonymously.
- That's what got me in trouble!

1226
00:48:59,480 --> 00:49:01,416
Because anonymously is how
I was writing them checks

1227
00:49:01,440 --> 00:49:04,205
and dealing with them
credit card frauds. I can't do that.

1228
00:49:04,280 --> 00:49:05,416
Somebody else got to call 'em.

1229
00:49:05,440 --> 00:49:09,843
I can't call them neither, Ma.
They know my voice, too.

1230
00:49:09,920 --> 00:49:11,456
Well, you know damn well
they know mine.

1231
00:49:11,480 --> 00:49:14,006
Ma, why don't you just go
describe your voice?

1232
00:49:14,080 --> 00:49:16,481
- Do what?
- Describe your voice.

1233
00:49:16,560 --> 00:49:18,050
The word is not "describe," honey.

1234
00:49:18,120 --> 00:49:20,256
If I describe my voice
then they gonna know it's me talkin'.

1235
00:49:20,280 --> 00:49:23,250
It is "disguise."
And I can't disguise my voice.

1236
00:49:23,320 --> 00:49:25,209
Because they have voice
data recognition.

1237
00:49:25,280 --> 00:49:27,521
I'm on the terrorist list, too.
I'm on terrorist watch.

1238
00:49:27,600 --> 00:49:28,931
They recognize it.

1239
00:49:29,000 --> 00:49:30,240
[groaning]

1240
00:49:30,360 --> 00:49:32,203
I'll call 'em, hell.

1241
00:49:34,240 --> 00:49:36,971
How much damn stuff
you got up in them breasts?

1242
00:49:37,040 --> 00:49:40,169
I bet you take all that stuff
out and breasts is just flat.

1243
00:49:40,240 --> 00:49:42,607
Barn, you high,
what you gonna say before you call 'em?

1244
00:49:43,000 --> 00:49:45,480
Uh... Yeah!

1245
00:49:45,560 --> 00:49:47,616
Wait a minute, hell,
you gonna call 'em like Lil Jon?

1246
00:49:47,640 --> 00:49:49,722
No, I'm gonna call 'em
like a little white girl.

1247
00:49:49,840 --> 00:49:51,524
Oh. You a little white girl?

1248
00:49:51,600 --> 00:49:53,682
Barn, you ain't never been
little in your life.

1249
00:49:53,800 --> 00:49:56,007
And she never been white, either.

1250
00:49:56,600 --> 00:49:58,250
What you gonna say when you call 'em?

1251
00:49:58,320 --> 00:50:02,245
Yeah, listen, we need the police.

1252
00:50:02,320 --> 00:50:07,326
I'm being held against my will.
Help me! Help me!

1253
00:50:09,440 --> 00:50:12,091
Ma, it's something wrong with her.

1254
00:50:12,160 --> 00:50:14,003
Really, really wrong.

1255
00:50:14,080 --> 00:50:16,845
Barn. Listen to me, honey,
make this perfectly clear.

1256
00:50:16,920 --> 00:50:19,491
Just call the people and tell them...
Listen to me.

1257
00:50:19,560 --> 00:50:21,244
Just tell them that an underage girl

1258
00:50:21,320 --> 00:50:23,920
snuck out the house and she at
a frat party. Don't do all of that.

1259
00:50:23,960 --> 00:50:25,962
Okay, Mabel.

1260
00:50:26,040 --> 00:50:27,929
- Yo, stop, stop!
- Pull the rip cord, bro!

1261
00:50:28,000 --> 00:50:30,731
- What the hell, don't you knock?
- Look, somethings wrong with Aday,

1262
00:50:30,840 --> 00:50:32,536
- she just ran out of here.
- Where did she go?

1263
00:50:32,560 --> 00:50:35,006
- I don't know!
- Well, what happened?

1264
00:50:35,080 --> 00:50:37,606
I told her to get the hell out.
She's 17.

1265
00:50:37,720 --> 00:50:40,564
And so is this broad fraud right here.

1266
00:50:40,680 --> 00:50:42,603
Are you crazy?
We could all go to jail!

1267
00:50:42,680 --> 00:50:47,242
Hold up, she's not 17.
Does this look like a 17-year-old?

1268
00:50:51,360 --> 00:50:52,964
Are you 17?

1269
00:50:53,520 --> 00:50:55,090
- Yes.
- Oh!

1270
00:50:55,160 --> 00:50:56,605
Tiffany, that's just...

1271
00:50:56,680 --> 00:50:58,808
- Tiffany, that's just wrong!
- I know. I'm sorry.

1272
00:50:58,880 --> 00:51:01,167
No! We can all get kicked out
of school for this.

1273
00:51:01,240 --> 00:51:03,402
- I'm sorry!
- Wait, how old are you guys?

1274
00:51:03,480 --> 00:51:04,527
- Eighteen.
- Eighteen.

1275
00:51:04,600 --> 00:51:05,886
Cool, cool.

1276
00:51:06,000 --> 00:51:08,128
All right, all right,
I need all the illegals

1277
00:51:08,200 --> 00:51:10,123
to get out of this frat right now.

1278
00:51:10,200 --> 00:51:12,123
- Go. There's the door.
- Guys.

1279
00:51:12,200 --> 00:51:13,656
- The cops are here.
- [guys groaning]

1280
00:51:13,680 --> 00:51:15,091
All right. All right, listen.

1281
00:51:15,160 --> 00:51:17,970
Everybody out. Take her out
the back door and try to find Aday.

1282
00:51:18,040 --> 00:51:20,168
- Come on, Tiff.
- Outta here. Let's go, go, go.

1283
00:51:20,240 --> 00:51:22,280
Out of my way, peasants!
I ain't going back. Go, go!

1284
00:51:26,200 --> 00:51:28,089
What's up, Officer?
My name is Jonathan.

1285
00:51:28,160 --> 00:51:30,242
The <i>El</i> Presidente
of this here fraterni-tay.

1286
00:51:30,320 --> 00:51:31,970
How can I help you?

1287
00:51:32,040 --> 00:51:34,088
Party's over.
Everyone clear out of the house.

1288
00:51:34,160 --> 00:51:36,128
- Present IDs. Now.
- [Dino] Hey, hey, hey.

1289
00:51:36,200 --> 00:51:37,929
You got a warrant, hot shot?

1290
00:51:38,000 --> 00:51:39,136
You want me to call the dean
and wake her up?

1291
00:51:39,160 --> 00:51:40,605
[Jonathan] No, no.

1292
00:51:40,680 --> 00:51:42,360
That's what I thought.
Everyone, clear out!

1293
00:51:42,400 --> 00:51:43,640
Party's over, now.

1294
00:51:43,720 --> 00:51:45,563
All right. Everyone out!

1295
00:51:45,640 --> 00:51:48,325
- Party's over.
- Lamest party ever.

1296
00:51:49,160 --> 00:51:50,605
What a bummer.

1297
00:51:50,680 --> 00:51:53,729
Officer Buzzkill over here, man.

1298
00:51:54,560 --> 00:51:56,688
[siren wailing]

1299
00:51:56,800 --> 00:51:58,643
[groans]

1300
00:51:58,760 --> 00:52:01,047
Did that really just happen?

1301
00:52:01,120 --> 00:52:04,124
- Man, it was lit.
- You really leaving?

1302
00:52:04,200 --> 00:52:07,568
I don't play with po-po.
We out, homie. All right.

1303
00:52:07,640 --> 00:52:10,530
Tyga, no.Tyga.

1304
00:52:11,360 --> 00:52:12,600
This sucks.

1305
00:52:12,680 --> 00:52:15,216
Hey, you know it was them geezers
that called the police. You know that.

1306
00:52:15,240 --> 00:52:16,651
Oh, I know.

1307
00:52:16,720 --> 00:52:18,160
We can't let 'em get away with this.

1308
00:52:18,200 --> 00:52:19,376
You know, it was our own fault,

1309
00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:21,016
they shouldn't have been here
in the first place.

1310
00:52:21,040 --> 00:52:22,246
Would you mind shutting up?

1311
00:52:22,320 --> 00:52:23,845
This is not our fault and I refuse

1312
00:52:23,920 --> 00:52:27,083
to let some old people
deny this frat's reputation.

1313
00:52:27,160 --> 00:52:28,207
What are we gonna do?

1314
00:52:28,280 --> 00:52:32,046
Oh, we're gonna get so even, fellas.
Here's the plan.

1315
00:52:32,120 --> 00:52:33,121
[inaudible]

1316
00:52:40,880 --> 00:52:43,724
Madea! Madea!

1317
00:52:45,400 --> 00:52:47,482
- [Madea] What the hell?
- [Bam] Mabel!

1318
00:52:47,600 --> 00:52:49,648
What's this? Lord, have mercy.

1319
00:52:49,720 --> 00:52:51,722
Hattie, what the hell wrong with you?

1320
00:52:51,800 --> 00:52:55,566
I think I heard somethin'
scratchin' up my wall.

1321
00:52:55,640 --> 00:52:57,210
Girl, go on with that, hell.

1322
00:52:57,280 --> 00:52:59,567
I think it's that man
that killed his whole family.

1323
00:52:59,640 --> 00:53:01,642
I think it's Mr. Wilson, Ma.

1324
00:53:01,720 --> 00:53:03,484
Hattie, calm the hell down, ain't no...

1325
00:53:03,560 --> 00:53:04,641
[loud banging]

1326
00:53:04,720 --> 00:53:06,096
What the hell is that, now?
What the hell is that?

1327
00:53:06,120 --> 00:53:07,121
[Bam] Wait!

1328
00:53:07,200 --> 00:53:09,407
It's him, Ma,
I ain't ready to die, Ma.

1329
00:53:09,480 --> 00:53:11,289
Listen, listen, would you hush?

1330
00:53:11,360 --> 00:53:13,456
[Madea] Yes. Please, Hattie.
Ain't no ghosts in this house.

1331
00:53:13,480 --> 00:53:15,136
Ain't no ghost gonna be
knocking on the damn door.

1332
00:53:15,160 --> 00:53:18,050
Does that make sense to you?
A ghost that damn knock on the door?

1333
00:53:18,120 --> 00:53:20,407
- [scoffs]
- That's crazy as hell!

1334
00:53:20,480 --> 00:53:22,130
Bam, go open that door.

1335
00:53:23,320 --> 00:53:26,130
I know you ain't sending me
to that door.

1336
00:53:26,200 --> 00:53:27,201
Uh-uh.

1337
00:53:28,680 --> 00:53:30,489
You scared, Mabel.

1338
00:53:30,600 --> 00:53:32,329
I ain't scared of nothin'.

1339
00:53:32,400 --> 00:53:35,370
Go open the door.
Go open the door, Mabel.

1340
00:53:36,680 --> 00:53:39,604
I'm tired right now.
Uh, Joe, open the door.

1341
00:53:39,680 --> 00:53:41,336
Hell, I ain't going to that door,
this ain't my house.

1342
00:53:41,360 --> 00:53:42,696
I ain't goin' nowhere near that door.

1343
00:53:42,720 --> 00:53:44,360
- Go on and get it, bruh.
- [loud banging]

1344
00:53:44,400 --> 00:53:46,289
- What the hell?
- Oh, no.

1345
00:53:46,360 --> 00:53:48,283
- Hattie, what the hell is it?
- Oh, no, Ma.

1346
00:53:48,360 --> 00:53:51,250
- What is it, Hattie?
- You see somethin' scary at the door?

1347
00:53:51,320 --> 00:53:52,560
What is it?

1348
00:53:52,640 --> 00:53:54,210
[whispers] It's white men.

1349
00:53:54,280 --> 00:53:55,361
[Madea] What?

1350
00:53:55,440 --> 00:53:56,805
You see white people?

1351
00:53:58,600 --> 00:54:00,841
[both screaming]

1352
00:54:00,920 --> 00:54:02,251
Girl, that's the po-po, here.

1353
00:54:02,320 --> 00:54:04,482
- Hide the stuff!
- Get the stuff...

1354
00:54:04,560 --> 00:54:06,562
Oh, hell, I ain't got nothing.
[chuckles]

1355
00:54:06,680 --> 00:54:08,444
We ain't got nothin' to hide.

1356
00:54:08,520 --> 00:54:11,205
That took me back in the day when
the po-po used to come round here,

1357
00:54:11,280 --> 00:54:13,169
and everybody would be
just duckin', runnin'.

1358
00:54:13,240 --> 00:54:14,480
Them was the good old days.

1359
00:54:14,560 --> 00:54:17,370
Oh, man, please.
I got a prescription, I'm good.

1360
00:54:17,480 --> 00:54:18,816
Okay, well, Bam, go open the door.

1361
00:54:18,840 --> 00:54:20,171
Why I gotta open the door?

1362
00:54:20,240 --> 00:54:22,720
'Cause you got a prescription, you good.
Go open the door here.

1363
00:54:22,800 --> 00:54:24,643
[Barn]
All right, all right.

1364
00:54:24,720 --> 00:54:26,768
[indistinct chatter on radio]

1365
00:54:28,800 --> 00:54:32,646
Hi. Urn, someone here
called for the cops?

1366
00:54:32,720 --> 00:54:34,484
Uh...

1367
00:54:34,560 --> 00:54:38,167
No speak-a English...
I'm from Jamaica.

1368
00:54:38,240 --> 00:54:41,323
- They speak English in Jamaica.
- Well, I'm from Mexico.

1369
00:54:41,400 --> 00:54:44,483
- Como <i>esta usted?</i>
- Well, then, I'm from China.

1370
00:54:44,560 --> 00:54:47,484
[speaking fake Chinese language]

1371
00:54:47,560 --> 00:54:50,325
Hey, hallelujah!
You speak in tongues?

1372
00:54:50,400 --> 00:54:53,882
- I went to college.
- And I love Jesus. Yes, I do, too.

1373
00:54:53,960 --> 00:54:55,883
- We all do, too.
- Yes.

1374
00:54:55,960 --> 00:54:57,849
Look, we got a call
about an underage girl...

1375
00:54:57,920 --> 00:54:59,763
What they saying?
I can't hear 'em.

1376
00:54:59,840 --> 00:55:01,205
What's that smell?

1377
00:55:01,280 --> 00:55:03,760
Oh! [chuckles]
Bam! [yells]

1378
00:55:03,840 --> 00:55:05,365
I been waitin' to do this for years!

1379
00:55:05,440 --> 00:55:08,887
I'm legal! I'm legal, bruh!
[exclaiming and laughing]

1380
00:55:08,960 --> 00:55:10,450
- Yeah! Yeah.
- [officer] Hallelujah.

1381
00:55:10,520 --> 00:55:13,251
Yeah. That's what I said,
too, when I got it.

1382
00:55:13,320 --> 00:55:14,810
Okay.

1383
00:55:15,440 --> 00:55:17,841
[Madea] I know damn well
this girl is not...

1384
00:55:17,960 --> 00:55:19,644
Where the hell you been?

1385
00:55:19,720 --> 00:55:22,371
I'm tellin' you right now,
I'm gonna... She...

1386
00:55:22,440 --> 00:55:24,204
I'ma bust her in her face.

1387
00:55:24,280 --> 00:55:25,611
Excuse me, are you Tiffany?

1388
00:55:25,680 --> 00:55:26,886
Yes.

1389
00:55:26,960 --> 00:55:28,405
Look, I get it, it's Halloween,

1390
00:55:28,480 --> 00:55:30,136
you guys are always
playing tricks on everybody.

1391
00:55:30,160 --> 00:55:32,049
- Enough is enough.
- Okay.

1392
00:55:32,120 --> 00:55:33,929
Enjoy your fun
and call it an evening.

1393
00:55:34,000 --> 00:55:35,331
Okay.

1394
00:55:35,400 --> 00:55:37,721
We can't keep on having
these prank calls. You understand?

1395
00:55:37,800 --> 00:55:39,689
I understand.

1396
00:55:39,760 --> 00:55:41,091
Yes, sir.

1397
00:55:41,160 --> 00:55:43,401
Okay. Well, you two
have a good evening.

1398
00:55:43,480 --> 00:55:45,562
Sorry, Officer.
Say "Sorry, Officer!"

1399
00:55:45,640 --> 00:55:47,404
Sorry, Officer.

1400
00:55:47,480 --> 00:55:48,800
[speaks in fake Chinese language]

1401
00:55:48,840 --> 00:55:49,887
Back to you.

1402
00:55:53,480 --> 00:55:54,925
- They gone?
- Yeah.

1403
00:55:55,000 --> 00:55:56,616
Call 'em back.
'Cause I'm getting' ready to get her.

1404
00:55:56,640 --> 00:55:59,291
Why, well, hold on, Muggum, why?

1405
00:55:59,360 --> 00:56:00,521
Where the hell you been?

1406
00:56:00,600 --> 00:56:02,376
- I been asleep.
- You have not been up there.

1407
00:56:02,400 --> 00:56:04,856
I've been up them stairs looking
for you, you were not sleepin'.

1408
00:56:04,880 --> 00:56:07,611
Well, did you check my dad's room?
Because that's where I was.

1409
00:56:07,680 --> 00:56:10,456
Why would you be up in his room when
you supposed to be in your own room?

1410
00:56:10,480 --> 00:56:13,563
Well, sometimes my room gets cold.
I'm sorry. That's just the way it is.

1411
00:56:13,680 --> 00:56:15,091
You lyin'.

1412
00:56:15,160 --> 00:56:16,856
Like I said, the closer
it gets to midnight,

1413
00:56:16,880 --> 00:56:19,326
the crazier things
are gonna get around here.

1414
00:56:19,400 --> 00:56:22,449
And you know
Mr. Wilson is close when...

1415
00:56:22,520 --> 00:56:24,409
- [talking indistinctly]
- [gasping]

1416
00:56:25,920 --> 00:56:26,967
That happens.

1417
00:56:29,040 --> 00:56:32,249
Okay, well, I'm gonna go
back to bed. So...

1418
00:56:32,320 --> 00:56:33,696
Come back here, honey.
Come back here.

1419
00:56:33,720 --> 00:56:34,846
Come right back damn here.

1420
00:56:34,920 --> 00:56:36,888
- Where is Aday?
- She's asleep.

1421
00:56:36,960 --> 00:56:38,656
You are lying to me,
that girl is not up there.

1422
00:56:38,680 --> 00:56:40,125
I'm not lying to you.

1423
00:56:40,200 --> 00:56:42,216
I'm coming up them stairs and check
for her, I'm tellin' you right now.

1424
00:56:42,240 --> 00:56:45,449
Okay, well, me and Aday
are gonna be in my dad's room.

1425
00:56:45,520 --> 00:56:47,284
Mabel, this... What the hell.

1426
00:56:47,360 --> 00:56:48,816
Now look here, I don't...
I don't do this.

1427
00:56:48,840 --> 00:56:50,205
I don't do this demonizing.

1428
00:56:50,280 --> 00:56:51,496
[whispering]
That's him! That's him.

1429
00:56:51,520 --> 00:56:53,409
Girl, what the hell going on
with these lights?

1430
00:56:53,480 --> 00:56:55,084
It's Mr. Wilson!

1431
00:56:55,160 --> 00:56:58,767
Mr. Wilson,
please leave me alone, Mr. Wilson.

1432
00:56:58,840 --> 00:57:02,049
It's gonna take a lot more than that
to get him to leave you alone.

1433
00:57:02,120 --> 00:57:04,646
And they say it gets cold when he's mad.

1434
00:57:04,720 --> 00:57:06,848
[Barn]
Mabel, she better stop this, Mabel.

1435
00:57:06,920 --> 00:57:09,844
She better stop this, I'm not playing.
She better stop this.

1436
00:57:09,920 --> 00:57:11,896
Girl, get the hell on
out of here with all the bullshit.

1437
00:57:11,920 --> 00:57:13,445
No, I'm telling the truth.
He's coming.

1438
00:57:13,520 --> 00:57:15,568
And the only safe place is in the bed.

1439
00:57:18,360 --> 00:57:20,966
Well, it is kind of shitty in here.

1440
00:57:21,080 --> 00:57:23,321
What? You went and did what to yourself?

1441
00:57:23,400 --> 00:57:26,722
- I said it's shitty in here.
- What are you saying?

1442
00:57:26,800 --> 00:57:28,689
It's shitty in here.

1443
00:57:28,760 --> 00:57:30,536
She's saying "cold," honey.
She's saying it's...

1444
00:57:30,560 --> 00:57:32,050
- Chilly.
- Chilly.

1445
00:57:32,120 --> 00:57:35,044
Lord, have mercy,
I don't know why the hell...

1446
00:57:35,120 --> 00:57:36,736
Brian better hurry up
and get the hell back here,

1447
00:57:36,760 --> 00:57:38,444
'cause, come on, sit down, here.

1448
00:57:38,520 --> 00:57:40,409
Mabel, will you please
come take me home?

1449
00:57:40,480 --> 00:57:41,840
[Madea] Just come on and sit down.

1450
00:57:49,920 --> 00:57:51,445
[exhales]

1451
00:57:51,520 --> 00:57:52,736
Answer the phone, answer the phone.

1452
00:57:52,760 --> 00:57:54,096
- Answer the phone.
- [line ringing]

1453
00:57:54,120 --> 00:57:55,376
<i>[automated voice]
Please leave a message.</i>

1454
00:57:55,400 --> 00:57:56,401
[sighs]

1455
00:57:56,480 --> 00:57:57,776
Aday, it's Tiffany,
I've been calling you,

1456
00:57:57,800 --> 00:58:00,371
I've been texting you
for almost half an hour now.

1457
00:58:00,440 --> 00:58:03,649
I don't know what to do, where are you?
Please, please get back to me.

1458
00:58:03,720 --> 00:58:05,165
Call me back, please.

1459
00:58:07,760 --> 00:58:09,091
[water running]

1460
00:58:09,160 --> 00:58:11,481
[Bam] Hattie! Turn the water off!

1461
00:58:14,720 --> 00:58:15,767
Hattie.

1462
00:58:15,840 --> 00:58:17,729
[water bubbling]

1463
00:58:17,800 --> 00:58:18,847
Hattie...

1464
00:58:20,840 --> 00:58:23,684
Hattie, you got to start
turning the water off

1465
00:58:23,760 --> 00:58:25,000
when you come in here.

1466
00:58:25,080 --> 00:58:26,730
[water bubbling]

1467
00:58:26,800 --> 00:58:27,847
What the hell?

1468
00:58:30,840 --> 00:58:31,887
What the...

1469
00:58:32,960 --> 00:58:34,007
Huh?

1470
00:58:45,160 --> 00:58:47,401
Wait a minute.

1471
00:58:47,480 --> 00:58:49,608
I know I turned this, I said turn off.

1472
00:58:54,640 --> 00:58:58,440
What the hell is that? Get... Get...

1473
00:58:58,520 --> 00:58:59,760
What the hell?

1474
00:59:06,800 --> 00:59:09,724
Mabel! What the hell is this?

1475
00:59:12,040 --> 00:59:15,931
Get your fat... They talkin' to...

1476
00:59:16,000 --> 00:59:20,722
Mabel! Madea! Madea!

1477
00:59:20,800 --> 00:59:22,976
<i>[man on TV] And Halloween
is going to the dogs this year,</i>

1478
00:59:23,000 --> 00:59:25,765
<i>at the annual Halloween
dog costume contest.</i>

1479
00:59:25,840 --> 00:59:27,922
<i>Dogs are hard at work,
trying to come up with</i> a...

1480
00:59:32,560 --> 00:59:38,761
<i>Came dressed as fairies, dinosaurs,
superheroes, pirates, and royalty.</i>

1481
00:59:38,840 --> 00:59:42,242
<i>But what really surprised the crowd
was a guest appearance...</i>

1482
00:59:47,200 --> 00:59:49,726
<i>Even the dogs were
getting into the festivities,</i>

1483
00:59:49,800 --> 00:59:52,690
<i>doing a little trick-or-treating
of their own.</i>

1484
00:59:52,760 --> 00:59:55,570
<i>But not all dogs
were enjoying the festivities.</i>

1485
00:59:55,640 --> 00:59:59,645
<i>But overall, it was
a wonderful day had by all.</i>

1486
00:59:59,720 --> 01:00:02,485
<i>In other news, two people
were killed when the driver of a...</i>

1487
01:00:02,560 --> 01:00:04,767
What the hell wrong with
this here remote control?

1488
01:00:04,840 --> 01:00:09,641
<i>[Jonathan in</i> a <i>ghostly voice]
Hattie... Hattie...</i>

1489
01:00:09,720 --> 01:00:12,041
[stammering] Oh, hell no,
now you gonna call my name?

1490
01:00:12,120 --> 01:00:14,646
<i>Hattie.</i>

1491
01:00:17,000 --> 01:00:18,001
Yes, Lord?

1492
01:00:18,080 --> 01:00:20,287
<i>You don't need the Lord.</i>

1493
01:00:22,160 --> 01:00:23,571
I know him.

1494
01:00:23,680 --> 01:00:26,001
<i>It's not the Lord.</i>

1495
01:00:26,080 --> 01:00:28,376
<i>[man on TV] We interrupt your
regularly scheduled programming</i>

1496
01:00:28,400 --> 01:00:29,845
<i>to bring you this special notice.</i>

1497
01:00:29,920 --> 01:00:32,002
<i>[Jonathan] I'm Mr. Wilson.</i>

1498
01:00:32,080 --> 01:00:35,766
Mr. Wilson? Oh, hell no! Hell no!

1499
01:00:35,840 --> 01:00:37,205
[screams]

1500
01:00:37,320 --> 01:00:42,326
Madea! Madea! Madea! Madea!

1501
01:00:43,320 --> 01:00:47,211
Madea! Madea!

1502
01:00:48,920 --> 01:00:50,096
Hattie, what the hell
is wrong with you?

1503
01:00:50,120 --> 01:00:52,009
- Ma! Madea!
- Mabel!

1504
01:00:52,080 --> 01:00:53,880
What the... What the hell
is wrong with y'all?

1505
01:00:53,920 --> 01:00:57,561
Ma, I've seen something in my room.
My TV won't go off.

1506
01:00:57,640 --> 01:00:58,856
- What?
- I was in that bathroom

1507
01:00:58,880 --> 01:01:01,360
- and the water wouldn't go off.
- Get up.

1508
01:01:01,440 --> 01:01:03,176
Mabel, I'm not playing with you,
listen to me.

1509
01:01:03,200 --> 01:01:04,736
I looked in the mirror, Mabel,
and there's something wrote,

1510
01:01:04,760 --> 01:01:08,207
"Get your fat ass out of here. Or die."

1511
01:01:08,280 --> 01:01:10,931
- Mabel, they're talking to me.
- Y'all believin' that girl?

1512
01:01:11,000 --> 01:01:13,685
That ain't nothing but Joe
playing a trick on y'all.

1513
01:01:13,760 --> 01:01:15,205
No, Joe's downstairs.

1514
01:01:15,280 --> 01:01:17,726
He's still downstairs.
He's sitting in that chair.

1515
01:01:17,800 --> 01:01:20,041
He's still sitting in that chair.

1516
01:01:20,120 --> 01:01:23,761
- He's still... Yeah.
- Where he was before?

1517
01:01:23,840 --> 01:01:26,525
Y'all go to bed.
Stop acting like y'all scared.

1518
01:01:26,600 --> 01:01:28,256
Ma, don't try to act like
you ain't scared.

1519
01:01:28,280 --> 01:01:30,681
- You scared, ain't you?
- I am not scared.

1520
01:01:30,760 --> 01:01:32,296
- [Barn] Mabel...
- Honey, I'm not scared.

1521
01:01:32,320 --> 01:01:34,288
Mabel, why are you up here in this bed?

1522
01:01:34,360 --> 01:01:36,283
[Hattie]
With your good running church shoes.

1523
01:01:36,360 --> 01:01:39,091
Mabel, you got every light on in here.

1524
01:01:39,160 --> 01:01:40,571
I was reading.

1525
01:01:40,640 --> 01:01:41,641
[both] Reading what?

1526
01:01:42,640 --> 01:01:44,290
I was trying to read the Bible.

1527
01:01:44,360 --> 01:01:47,250
- You weren't reading no Bible, Ma!
- Where is the Bible?

1528
01:01:47,320 --> 01:01:50,164
It's on the table in my heart.

1529
01:01:50,240 --> 01:01:51,924
Mabel, we gotta get out of here.

1530
01:01:52,000 --> 01:01:53,968
- [loud crashing]
- [all gasping]

1531
01:01:55,360 --> 01:01:58,011
- Okay.
- I'm having a...

1532
01:01:58,080 --> 01:01:59,656
- Did that come from the attic?
- [Hattie] Yeah.

1533
01:01:59,680 --> 01:02:03,127
Did she say he was in the attic?
Get the hell on up out of here!

1534
01:02:03,240 --> 01:02:05,083
Y'all get the hell up out of here!

1535
01:02:08,960 --> 01:02:10,246
[Bam] Mabel.

1536
01:02:10,320 --> 01:02:12,322
Y'all know I can't
run down these stairs.

1537
01:02:12,400 --> 01:02:13,811
What the hell?

1538
01:02:13,880 --> 01:02:17,805
Now, Joe, stop playing games
on these old ladies up there!

1539
01:02:17,920 --> 01:02:20,764
I ain't playing no damn jokes.
I'm playing with myself.

1540
01:02:20,880 --> 01:02:22,656
Joe, I know it's you.
I know you're down here doin' it.

1541
01:02:22,680 --> 01:02:25,126
Look, everybody out here out of breath.
Can't breathe at all.

1542
01:02:25,200 --> 01:02:27,771
Bam tired running down the stairs.

1543
01:02:27,840 --> 01:02:29,080
Damn, you out of shape.

1544
01:02:29,160 --> 01:02:32,130
How the hell you get this out of breath
running down the stairs, Bam?

1545
01:02:32,200 --> 01:02:34,646
Now Joe, stop it.

1546
01:02:34,720 --> 01:02:37,296
Now, y'all come on, we only got
a few more hours to be in this house.

1547
01:02:37,320 --> 01:02:38,936
Now, come on, let's go on
up there and go to bed.

1548
01:02:38,960 --> 01:02:40,610
- [loud crashing]
- [all gasp]

1549
01:02:40,680 --> 01:02:45,163
- Madea! You heard that, Ma?
- I heard hollering like a damn fool.

1550
01:02:45,280 --> 01:02:48,568
- Ma, I know you heard it upstairs.
- No, I didn't. I didn't hear nothing.

1551
01:02:48,640 --> 01:02:51,689
Yes, you did, Ma. You know, they say
that's where he killed

1552
01:02:51,760 --> 01:02:54,730
his whole entire family,
up in the attic.

1553
01:02:55,440 --> 01:02:57,204
Joe, you see these ladies is worried.

1554
01:02:57,280 --> 01:03:00,216
Get up and be a man and go on up there
and check and see what's in the attic.

1555
01:03:00,240 --> 01:03:01,366
Bitch, please.

1556
01:03:01,440 --> 01:03:03,681
Mabel, come on, take me home.

1557
01:03:03,800 --> 01:03:06,167
Hey, I'll take all you hoes to a hotel,

1558
01:03:06,240 --> 01:03:08,368
if you hoes don't tell.
[laughs]

1559
01:03:08,440 --> 01:03:10,010
Shut the hell up!

1560
01:03:11,520 --> 01:03:14,251
Ma, go on up there
and see what's going on.

1561
01:03:14,320 --> 01:03:16,368
I'm gonna stay down here with Joe.

1562
01:03:16,440 --> 01:03:18,044
Me too.

1563
01:03:18,120 --> 01:03:19,360
[Madea] I'm gonna go.

1564
01:03:20,320 --> 01:03:21,924
- I ain't scared.
- Okay, great.

1565
01:03:22,000 --> 01:03:23,047
I ain't never scared.

1566
01:03:23,120 --> 01:03:24,724
- You're not scared.
- I'm never scared.

1567
01:03:24,800 --> 01:03:26,096
- Then go up there then.
- I'm going up there.

1568
01:03:26,120 --> 01:03:27,360
- You bad.
- I'm never scared.

1569
01:03:27,440 --> 01:03:29,283
- You bad.
- I'm bad. Who's bad?

1570
01:03:29,360 --> 01:03:31,522
- I ain't scared of nothing!
- Okay, great.

1571
01:03:33,520 --> 01:03:35,443
The hell I got up here
making all this noise?

1572
01:03:35,520 --> 01:03:38,364
Probably nothing but these pipes
rattling like they do in my house.

1573
01:03:38,440 --> 01:03:40,124
I don't know what's going on up here.

1574
01:03:40,200 --> 01:03:41,645
Okay, great. Bye, Mabel.

1575
01:03:41,720 --> 01:03:43,376
- I ain't scared. I'll be back.
- Okay, great.

1576
01:03:43,400 --> 01:03:45,050
- Bye, Mabel.
- Okay, great.

1577
01:03:45,680 --> 01:03:50,208
If she don't come back I just
want y'all to know, that's a dude.

1578
01:03:52,280 --> 01:03:54,009
I wanna go home, Mabel.

1579
01:03:55,760 --> 01:03:57,444
I ain't scared of nothing.

1580
01:03:59,120 --> 01:04:00,645
I ain't scared of nothing.

1581
01:04:12,560 --> 01:04:15,689
I ain't never been scared of nothing.
I've been big all my life.

1582
01:04:16,680 --> 01:04:18,762
I had to be brave.

1583
01:04:20,480 --> 01:04:22,687
All my life I had to fight.

1584
01:04:25,120 --> 01:04:28,044
I ain't never thought
I'd have to fight in Brian's house.

1585
01:04:38,600 --> 01:04:40,204
Ain't nobody up here.

1586
01:04:42,640 --> 01:04:45,564
Nobody. Ain't nobody up here.
Hey, ain't nobody up here.

1587
01:04:46,360 --> 01:04:48,169
[wind howling]

1588
01:04:50,000 --> 01:04:51,411
[metal clattering]

1589
01:04:58,400 --> 01:04:59,606
I don't see nothing.

1590
01:05:03,400 --> 01:05:05,368
Yeah, ain't nothing up here.

1591
01:05:05,440 --> 01:05:09,126
Got all these crazy-looking costumes
and everything, ain't nothing up here.

1592
01:05:15,280 --> 01:05:17,089
[floor creaking]

1593
01:05:25,400 --> 01:05:27,164
[shallow breathing]

1594
01:05:27,240 --> 01:05:29,129
Damn clown was back there.

1595
01:05:36,280 --> 01:05:39,329
I know the damn clown did not just
move from where it was.

1596
01:05:48,080 --> 01:05:49,525
- [roars]
- [screams]

1597
01:05:52,360 --> 01:05:54,124
Madea, you think she's all right?

1598
01:05:54,200 --> 01:05:57,170
- Ain't nothing to worry about.
- [Madea screaming]

1599
01:05:57,240 --> 01:05:58,480
What? What?

1600
01:05:58,600 --> 01:06:00,284
Oh, Jesus. Ma!

1601
01:06:00,360 --> 01:06:02,010
Mabel, are you all right?

1602
01:06:02,080 --> 01:06:04,696
I thought there were a herd of buffalo
coming down the damn stairs.

1603
01:06:04,720 --> 01:06:08,520
- Shaking up the whole damn house.
- Dea, what happened?

1604
01:06:08,600 --> 01:06:11,444
We got to go to my house.
We got to get the hell up out of here.

1605
01:06:11,520 --> 01:06:12,681
I thought you'd never ask!

1606
01:06:12,760 --> 01:06:15,127
- Yes. Yes. Let's go.
- Ma, let's ride!

1607
01:06:15,240 --> 01:06:16,241
[screams]

1608
01:06:16,320 --> 01:06:17,656
What the hell is wrong with you, Hattie?

1609
01:06:17,680 --> 01:06:18,841
[Barn] Uh-uh.

1610
01:06:18,920 --> 01:06:20,524
- Ah... Look!
- I don't see nothing!

1611
01:06:20,600 --> 01:06:21,726
I'm not gonna fall for that.

1612
01:06:21,800 --> 01:06:23,245
There's a clown.

1613
01:06:23,320 --> 01:06:24,685
[gasps] You saw a clown?

1614
01:06:24,760 --> 01:06:26,683
- Yes.
- What'd he look like?

1615
01:06:26,760 --> 01:06:31,004
Oh, a dirty-looking clown.
He's a crazy-looking clown!

1616
01:06:31,080 --> 01:06:33,208
I saw one upstairs in the attic, too.

1617
01:06:33,280 --> 01:06:35,282
I'm looking at three damn clowns.

1618
01:06:35,360 --> 01:06:38,330
Put y'all three side by side,
you shaped like a one-oh-one.

1619
01:06:38,400 --> 01:06:40,050
Get the hell on up out of here.

1620
01:06:40,120 --> 01:06:42,361
Joe, I'm telling you there's
something in this house.

1621
01:06:42,440 --> 01:06:44,283
I gotta get out of here.

1622
01:06:44,360 --> 01:06:46,522
We got to go.
We got to go.

1623
01:06:46,600 --> 01:06:48,284
I don't see nothing. He gone.

1624
01:06:48,360 --> 01:06:49,407
- Yeah.
- I know.

1625
01:06:49,480 --> 01:06:51,164
- [both scream]
- Mabel!

1626
01:06:51,240 --> 01:06:52,616
I'm getting ready to choke
the hell out of her.

1627
01:06:52,640 --> 01:06:54,404
- I'm gonna punch her dead.
- Mabel.

1628
01:06:54,480 --> 01:06:58,041
Hey, girl, I'm getting ready to clog
your esophagus. Shut up!

1629
01:06:58,120 --> 01:06:59,326
It moved!

1630
01:06:59,400 --> 01:07:01,767
- What the hell is wrong with you?
- It moved!

1631
01:07:01,840 --> 01:07:03,649
Yeah, if something is behind me...

1632
01:07:03,720 --> 01:07:05,324
- Mabel. Oh, Lord!
- I'm gonna...

1633
01:07:05,400 --> 01:07:07,607
I'm telling you right now, girl...
There's some... What?

1634
01:07:07,680 --> 01:07:09,682
Mabel, no! No, look!

1635
01:07:09,760 --> 01:07:12,491
- [shallow breathing]
- What's that breathing?

1636
01:07:12,560 --> 01:07:16,087
It's a clown, Ma!

1637
01:07:16,160 --> 01:07:18,731
[Barn] I don't like no clown.
[whimpering]

1638
01:07:21,160 --> 01:07:23,322
[all screaming]

1639
01:07:23,400 --> 01:07:25,243
Run! Run!

1640
01:07:25,320 --> 01:07:27,846
Get the hell out the door!
Get the hell out the door!

1641
01:07:28,840 --> 01:07:30,256
- [Barn] Mabel!
- [indistinct shouting]

1642
01:07:30,280 --> 01:07:31,805
Hell no! Hell no! Hell no!

1643
01:07:31,880 --> 01:07:35,805
Hell no! Hell no!
Hell no, girl! Hell no!

1644
01:07:35,880 --> 01:07:37,769
Get in the car!
Get in the car!

1645
01:07:37,840 --> 01:07:39,536
Get in the car, Hattie!
Get in the car, Bam!

1646
01:07:39,560 --> 01:07:41,164
[Hattie] Come on, Bam!

1647
01:07:41,240 --> 01:07:42,696
Get in the car!
Get in my car! Get in the car!

1648
01:07:42,720 --> 01:07:45,530
Open my door! Y'all know
I had hip surgery!

1649
01:07:45,600 --> 01:07:47,125
Mabel, be careful!

1650
01:07:47,200 --> 01:07:48,611
[moaning]

1651
01:07:54,400 --> 01:07:56,801
- Why we just sitting here?
- I forgot the keys, girl.

1652
01:07:56,880 --> 01:07:58,803
Ah! Hotwire it!

1653
01:07:58,880 --> 01:08:01,611
Barn, what kind of lady
do you think I am?

1654
01:08:01,720 --> 01:08:03,643
I'm a lady, I don't know
how to hotwire a car.

1655
01:08:03,720 --> 01:08:07,441
Who the hell do you think I am,
some kind of common criminal?

1656
01:08:07,560 --> 01:08:10,643
Well, that's all you had to say,
I got you on that, Ma.

1657
01:08:10,720 --> 01:08:13,530
- Me too, girl, you know I know how...
- Wait! Wait!

1658
01:08:13,600 --> 01:08:16,604
Are we just gonna leave the girl
in the house with the clown?

1659
01:08:16,680 --> 01:08:18,736
[Madea] Listen, let me tell you
right now, that's Joe's grandchild.

1660
01:08:18,760 --> 01:08:20,016
I ain't got nothing to do with her.

1661
01:08:20,040 --> 01:08:21,405
She already got a nasty attitude,

1662
01:08:21,480 --> 01:08:23,562
it's every clown for himself.
Hotwire this.

1663
01:08:23,640 --> 01:08:24,687
[electricity crackling]

1664
01:08:24,760 --> 01:08:25,816
- [engine starts]
- [both scream]

1665
01:08:25,840 --> 01:08:27,285
Oh, Joe, don't do that!

1666
01:08:27,360 --> 01:08:29,761
The hell?
Joe, what the hell is wrong with you?

1667
01:08:29,840 --> 01:08:31,046
<i>Hey.</i>

1668
01:08:31,120 --> 01:08:34,056
The hell is wrong with you? I was about
to bust your face with this damn gun.

1669
01:08:34,080 --> 01:08:35,536
I don't know where the hell
you think you're going.

1670
01:08:35,560 --> 01:08:38,609
You left these in the house. You left
your purse and everything up in there.

1671
01:08:38,680 --> 01:08:40,330
- Here.
- Give me my keys.

1672
01:08:40,400 --> 01:08:42,607
Where are you going without them?

1673
01:08:42,720 --> 01:08:44,240
- I don't know.
- [man on phone] <i>Hello?</i>

1674
01:08:44,280 --> 01:08:46,216
And this phone of yours
been ringing off the hook.

1675
01:08:46,240 --> 01:08:47,810
- Hello?
- I was up in there...

1676
01:08:47,880 --> 01:08:49,376
Burning up your minutes
and somebody's on the phone.

1677
01:08:49,400 --> 01:08:50,856
<i>- Is anybody there?
- Who is it on the phone?</i>

1678
01:08:50,880 --> 01:08:54,168
It's some preacher on the phone
working on my nerve!

1679
01:08:54,240 --> 01:08:57,164
Hell! Preacher. Pray for that.

1680
01:08:57,240 --> 01:08:58,730
- Here.
- [Madea] What?

1681
01:08:58,800 --> 01:09:00,848
Leave me the hell alone.
I'm going to lay down.

1682
01:09:02,280 --> 01:09:03,566
[cell phone ringing]

1683
01:09:03,640 --> 01:09:05,529
- Who is this?
- Don't answer that, Ma!

1684
01:09:05,600 --> 01:09:07,376
Mabel, don't answer that.
I saw it in a movie.

1685
01:09:07,400 --> 01:09:08,856
When you answer that thing,
the little girl...

1686
01:09:08,880 --> 01:09:10,803
When she answered the phone,
she got dead.

1687
01:09:10,880 --> 01:09:13,565
I remember that.
She said "Hello" and that thing said,

1688
01:09:13,640 --> 01:09:15,324
"Are you in the house alone?"

1689
01:09:15,400 --> 01:09:17,368
- I remember that.
- Yes.

1690
01:09:17,440 --> 01:09:18,885
Don't answer.

1691
01:09:18,960 --> 01:09:20,291
It's all right.

1692
01:09:20,360 --> 01:09:21,400
- Don't answer it!
- Don't.

1693
01:09:21,440 --> 01:09:22,576
- Don't answer it.
- [man on phone] <i>Hello?</i>

1694
01:09:22,600 --> 01:09:23,840
But I hear somebody.

1695
01:09:23,920 --> 01:09:25,096
<i>- Is anybody there?
- You say there's somebody...</i>

1696
01:09:25,120 --> 01:09:26,485
Who is it?
Who the hell is it?

1697
01:09:26,560 --> 01:09:28,449
<i>- This is Reverend Walker.
- Hey, Reverend.</i>

1698
01:09:28,520 --> 01:09:30,602
- Hello, Madea.
- Reverend, look here.

1699
01:09:30,680 --> 01:09:33,056
If you calling to pray for me,
I ain't got no time for that right now.

1700
01:09:33,080 --> 01:09:35,606
- Well, a little prayer would be good.
- Bam, hush.

1701
01:09:35,680 --> 01:09:37,205
Okay, go and pray, Rev, go and pray.

1702
01:09:37,280 --> 01:09:38,850
<i>- Oh, Lord.
- Praise Jesus!</i>

1703
01:09:38,920 --> 01:09:40,365
<i>Help us all to find peace!</i>

1704
01:09:40,440 --> 01:09:42,283
I'm gonna make him pray harder,
watch this.

1705
01:09:42,360 --> 01:09:43,646
Hallelujah!

1706
01:09:43,720 --> 01:09:44,881
<i>Hallelujah! Wool!</i>

1707
01:09:44,960 --> 01:09:46,803
[laughs] He prayed harder.

1708
01:09:46,880 --> 01:09:48,291
<i>Come bring your...</i>

1709
01:09:48,360 --> 01:09:49,776
Look he started... [laughs]
He started prayin' hard.

1710
01:09:49,800 --> 01:09:51,723
What is it, Reverend?
All right, enough.

1711
01:09:51,800 --> 01:09:53,245
Amen, Jesus wept. What is it?

1712
01:09:53,320 --> 01:09:54,481
<i>Have you seen Aday?</i>

1713
01:09:54,560 --> 01:09:56,244
No, she's up in the house with...

1714
01:09:56,320 --> 01:09:57,970
- No, she's not. No.
- She's not?

1715
01:09:58,040 --> 01:09:59,883
- I know you lying to me.
- No, I'm not.

1716
01:09:59,960 --> 01:10:01,616
Reverend, please don't
make me cuss on this phone.

1717
01:10:01,640 --> 01:10:03,847
<i>- You need to come to the church.
- Okay, fine.</i>

1718
01:10:03,920 --> 01:10:05,576
<i>- Come on down to the church.
- Thank you. Thank you.</i>

1719
01:10:05,600 --> 01:10:07,656
- Madea. Now, Madea, <i>come on...</i>
- Well, what the Rev want?

1720
01:10:07,680 --> 01:10:10,056
That girl snuck out of this house
and went down to that frat party.

1721
01:10:10,080 --> 01:10:12,321
That damn Tiffany done lied again!

1722
01:10:12,400 --> 01:10:15,370
The Reverend want me to come over to
the church so he can talk to me.

1723
01:10:15,480 --> 01:10:16,760
That won't be a bad idea at all.

1724
01:10:16,800 --> 01:10:18,496
A little prayer won't hurt
nobody right now.

1725
01:10:18,520 --> 01:10:20,016
Barn, I'm not going up
in there for no prayer.

1726
01:10:20,040 --> 01:10:21,456
I'm going up in there
to set this straight.

1727
01:10:21,480 --> 01:10:23,767
This child, she gonna need
more than a little prayer.

1728
01:10:23,840 --> 01:10:26,605
She gonna need the damn clown
and everything in there to help her

1729
01:10:26,680 --> 01:10:28,016
when I get back here,
I'm telling you right now.

1730
01:10:28,040 --> 01:10:29,480
'Cause I'm not gonna deal with this.

1731
01:10:29,520 --> 01:10:32,056
And Mr. Wilson and a clown, that's
gonna be the least of her worries.

1732
01:10:32,080 --> 01:10:35,402
Well, wait a minute, Ma, we just gonna
leave the girl up in there, right there?

1733
01:10:35,480 --> 01:10:36,720
What the hell else we gonna do?

1734
01:10:36,760 --> 01:10:38,336
I'm not going
back up in there to get her.

1735
01:10:38,360 --> 01:10:39,600
[tires screeching]

1736
01:10:40,680 --> 01:10:42,603
[mumbling]

1737
01:10:47,080 --> 01:10:49,287
What the hell?

1738
01:10:49,360 --> 01:10:53,410
Go on somewhere with that, clown.
Coming up here with that bullshit.

1739
01:10:53,480 --> 01:10:55,005
Go on, clown, go on.

1740
01:10:55,080 --> 01:10:56,127
[floorboards creaking]

1741
01:10:57,720 --> 01:10:59,449
[wind whistling]

1742
01:10:59,520 --> 01:11:01,536
Ain't nothing over there,
that's it, I'm telling you.

1743
01:11:01,560 --> 01:11:03,528
There ain't nobody in here with me.

1744
01:11:04,440 --> 01:11:05,487
[exhales sharply]

1745
01:11:06,800 --> 01:11:08,768
That's what I know.

1746
01:11:08,840 --> 01:11:10,763
[floorboards creaking]

1747
01:11:10,840 --> 01:11:12,649
[shallow breathing]

1748
01:11:16,160 --> 01:11:17,446
Like that?

1749
01:11:18,040 --> 01:11:19,041
Yeah.

1750
01:11:21,040 --> 01:11:22,041
[grunts]

1751
01:11:25,040 --> 01:11:27,850
I don't play that Halloween bullshit!

1752
01:11:29,000 --> 01:11:32,447
Blowing my damn high,
coming up in here with a clown costume.

1753
01:11:32,520 --> 01:11:34,409
I did that already tonight.

1754
01:11:37,040 --> 01:11:38,724
- [Barn] Mabel!
- [Hattie] Yeah.

1755
01:11:38,800 --> 01:11:40,216
[Madea] Got me going
out here to church, you know?

1756
01:11:40,240 --> 01:11:41,924
And that damn Aday
wasn't even up there.

1757
01:11:42,000 --> 01:11:43,096
You wait till I get back home,
deal with that girl.

1758
01:11:43,120 --> 01:11:44,406
That's crazy <i>as</i> hell.

1759
01:11:44,480 --> 01:11:45,925
[Bam] She is something else, Mabel.

1760
01:11:46,000 --> 01:11:47,136
[Madea]
I'm gonna fix her though, she's...

1761
01:11:47,160 --> 01:11:49,456
That clown gonna be the least of
her worries when I get back there.

1762
01:11:49,480 --> 01:11:51,216
[Barn] Well, Mabel,
we good for going to the church

1763
01:11:51,240 --> 01:11:53,811
and that's all right because
we gonna need a little prayer.

1764
01:11:53,880 --> 01:11:55,576
- [engine sputtering]
- [Madea] What the hell?

1765
01:11:55,600 --> 01:11:57,125
What the hell's wrong
with this thing?

1766
01:11:57,200 --> 01:11:59,096
- [Hattie] Mabel! [whimpers]
- [Bam] Mabel! Jesus!

1767
01:11:59,120 --> 01:12:01,088
What the hell is wrong with it?

1768
01:12:01,160 --> 01:12:03,686
I don't know, I'm pressing the gas.

1769
01:12:03,760 --> 01:12:05,603
Oh, now it's goin'...
Now it's goin' backwards.

1770
01:12:05,680 --> 01:12:07,489
What in hell wrong with it?

1771
01:12:07,560 --> 01:12:09,369
" Ma!
<i>'</i> Stop it!

1772
01:12:09,440 --> 01:12:10,680
What the hell is wrong with it?

1773
01:12:10,760 --> 01:12:12,056
- Put it in drive.
- [engine backfires]

1774
01:12:12,080 --> 01:12:13,809
Baby, don't cut it off!

1775
01:12:13,880 --> 01:12:16,406
I didn't cut the damn car off,
it just killed, damn!

1776
01:12:16,480 --> 01:12:17,845
The hell is wrong with this thing?

1777
01:12:17,920 --> 01:12:19,046
[Bam coughing]

1778
01:12:19,120 --> 01:12:20,690
Let me look up under the hood.

1779
01:12:20,760 --> 01:12:22,696
I told you, I know Joe
did something to my damn car,

1780
01:12:22,720 --> 01:12:24,416
that's why I never let him
go borrow my car.

1781
01:12:24,440 --> 01:12:26,010
Ma, we gonna wait right here for you.

1782
01:12:26,080 --> 01:12:29,004
Hattie, get your ass out of the car,
come help me. Bam, get out.

1783
01:12:29,080 --> 01:12:30,656
Mabel, I'm not getting
out of this car right now.

1784
01:12:30,680 --> 01:12:32,176
[Madea] It takes two people
to open this hood.

1785
01:12:32,200 --> 01:12:33,486
Come on, help me open it.

1786
01:12:33,560 --> 01:12:35,369
Ma, we caught here
in these damn woods!

1787
01:12:35,440 --> 01:12:37,841
- Come, help me open the hood, girl.
- Oh, Lord.

1788
01:12:37,920 --> 01:12:39,490
Help me open, you've got to pry it up.

1789
01:12:39,560 --> 01:12:43,042
Come on, on the count of three.
Count of three. Look. One, two, three.

1790
01:12:45,080 --> 01:12:47,003
Whoo! Yeah!

1791
01:12:47,080 --> 01:12:49,606
When's the last time
you had this thing serviced?

1792
01:12:49,680 --> 01:12:51,648
1972, when I bought it.

1793
01:12:51,760 --> 01:12:53,000
[animal howling]

1794
01:12:54,120 --> 01:12:55,645
What's wrong with it?

1795
01:12:55,720 --> 01:12:58,724
We don't know, Barn, hell,
we just got out the car!

1796
01:12:58,800 --> 01:13:02,566
- The hell's wrong with her?
- Ma, I'm scared out here.

1797
01:13:02,640 --> 01:13:04,496
You scared in the house,
you scared in the dark, hush.

1798
01:13:04,520 --> 01:13:05,806
Ain't nothing out here.

1799
01:13:05,880 --> 01:13:08,770
No, you know I don't like to be out here
in the dark in these here woods.

1800
01:13:08,840 --> 01:13:10,080
Nothing wrong with these woods,

1801
01:13:10,120 --> 01:13:12,600
hell, ain't nothing out there.
Hattie, just hush.

1802
01:13:12,680 --> 01:13:13,761
Shh!

1803
01:13:13,840 --> 01:13:15,683
Is everybody all right?

1804
01:13:15,760 --> 01:13:19,401
Barn, we fine. Hell, we fine,
would you please be quiet?

1805
01:13:19,480 --> 01:13:20,891
Damn, what the hell wrong with her?

1806
01:13:21,000 --> 01:13:22,525
Mabel.

1807
01:13:23,560 --> 01:13:24,925
I hear something out there.

1808
01:13:25,000 --> 01:13:26,480
You don't hear nothing, Hattie. Hell.

1809
01:13:26,520 --> 01:13:27,965
Look, is this the carburetor?

1810
01:13:28,040 --> 01:13:29,800
I don't know nothing about
working on no car.

1811
01:13:30,760 --> 01:13:32,922
[low growling]

1812
01:13:33,000 --> 01:13:34,445
[Hattie] Ma.

1813
01:13:34,520 --> 01:13:35,851
[snarling]

1814
01:13:35,920 --> 01:13:37,604
Madea!

1815
01:13:37,680 --> 01:13:39,648
Oh, jeez! Oh! Madea!

1816
01:13:39,720 --> 01:13:40,960
What the hell's wrong with you?

1817
01:13:41,000 --> 01:13:43,844
- Madea!
- What? What you running for?

1818
01:13:45,040 --> 01:13:47,247
[growling and snarling]

1819
01:13:50,560 --> 01:13:52,562
Oh, hell, Oh, hell. Hell!

1820
01:13:52,640 --> 01:13:53,971
[screaming]

1821
01:13:55,040 --> 01:13:58,123
[Hattie] Madea! Madea!

1822
01:13:58,800 --> 01:14:00,564
Madea!

1823
01:14:00,640 --> 01:14:02,688
- Madea!
- [Bam] Hattie!

1824
01:14:02,760 --> 01:14:04,888
Mabel! Mabel! Wait for me!

1825
01:14:05,000 --> 01:14:06,161
[screaming]

1826
01:14:06,240 --> 01:14:14,240
Help me, Jesus! Help me, Jesus!

1827
01:14:17,000 --> 01:14:18,047
[panting]

1828
01:14:22,920 --> 01:14:24,081
Help me, Jesus!

1829
01:14:24,160 --> 01:14:26,891
Help me, Jesus! Help me, Jesus!

1830
01:14:26,960 --> 01:14:28,883
- Help me, Jesus!
- [door opens]

1831
01:14:28,960 --> 01:14:30,200
I need Jesus!

1832
01:14:30,280 --> 01:14:31,725
Oh, Lord, somebody help me,

1833
01:14:31,800 --> 01:14:33,576
I just need Jesus,
come, somebody pray for me.

1834
01:14:33,600 --> 01:14:36,001
What'd I do, what'd I do?
Somebody just needs to pray for me.

1835
01:14:36,080 --> 01:14:38,048
[stammering]
Oh, I need Jesus! I need...

1836
01:14:38,160 --> 01:14:40,527
You can't smoke in here, Madea.

1837
01:14:40,600 --> 01:14:42,523
Okay, but didn't Moses
have a burning bush?

1838
01:14:42,600 --> 01:14:43,886
I need the lamb of God.

1839
01:14:44,000 --> 01:14:45,525
Would you like to be saved, darling?

1840
01:14:45,600 --> 01:14:47,648
Oh, yes, I wanna be saved,
will that help me?

1841
01:14:47,720 --> 01:14:50,200
Oh, praise the Lord,
Hallelujah, that's wonderful!

1842
01:14:50,280 --> 01:14:53,523
Now do you believe that
Jesus is the son of God?

1843
01:14:53,600 --> 01:14:55,296
If I have to, that's what
I'm gonna believe.

1844
01:14:55,320 --> 01:14:57,721
Just, I just need y'all to help me.

1845
01:14:57,800 --> 01:15:00,201
And you confess your sins?

1846
01:15:00,280 --> 01:15:02,056
Up in here with all these
children up in here?

1847
01:15:02,080 --> 01:15:05,243
Honey, you don't want me confessing
my sin up in here around these men.

1848
01:15:05,320 --> 01:15:07,163
I'll have all of them blushing.
[laughs]

1849
01:15:07,240 --> 01:15:09,256
You don't know what I used to
do back in the day, baby!

1850
01:15:09,280 --> 01:15:11,681
Wasn't no fun. Bam! [laughs]

1851
01:15:11,760 --> 01:15:13,046
Pray for me.

1852
01:15:13,120 --> 01:15:16,567
[stuttering] Well, not to Sister Alice,
not to anybody in here, but to Him.

1853
01:15:16,640 --> 01:15:18,936
You just confess with your mouth
and believe in your heart,

1854
01:15:18,960 --> 01:15:20,560
and you shall be saved,
it's that simple.

1855
01:15:20,600 --> 01:15:22,136
Oh, just like that
and all my problems go away,

1856
01:15:22,160 --> 01:15:24,016
ain't gonna be no more demons
following me and there's monkeys

1857
01:15:24,040 --> 01:15:25,485
and everything walking behind me?

1858
01:15:25,560 --> 01:15:28,211
Well, getting saved doesn't mean
all your troubles won't come,

1859
01:15:28,280 --> 01:15:30,931
but it'll help you when it do.
I'm a living witness now.

1860
01:15:31,000 --> 01:15:32,650
I confess that Jesus is son of God.

1861
01:15:32,720 --> 01:15:35,564
I believe. Sha-na-na!
Yes, I believe, help me.

1862
01:15:35,640 --> 01:15:37,051
Am I saved? I'm saved now!

1863
01:15:37,120 --> 01:15:38,770
- Yes...
- Yes, I'm saved!

1864
01:15:38,840 --> 01:15:40,888
Yes, praise the Lord, I'm saved.

1865
01:15:40,960 --> 01:15:42,928
- [applause]
- Yes, Hallelujah. Thank you.

1866
01:15:43,000 --> 01:15:46,083
Them demons that I keep seeing
and monkeys and clowns...

1867
01:15:46,160 --> 01:15:48,606
They've been following you. I know.

1868
01:15:48,680 --> 01:15:49,966
[Madea sighs]

1869
01:15:50,040 --> 01:15:52,884
Reverend, you anointed just like TDJ.

1870
01:15:52,960 --> 01:15:54,962
How you know that, Reverend?
How you know that?

1871
01:15:55,040 --> 01:15:56,883
Uh... Aday told me.

1872
01:15:56,960 --> 01:15:58,325
[Madea] How she know that?

1873
01:15:58,400 --> 01:16:01,643
Baby, you got the gift like Joel Osteen,
you got the gift, baby?

1874
01:16:01,720 --> 01:16:04,690
I have a confession. I...

1875
01:16:04,760 --> 01:16:06,888
We snuck out of the house
and went to the frat party.

1876
01:16:07,680 --> 01:16:09,045
I'm so sorry, Madea.

1877
01:16:09,120 --> 01:16:11,043
I already asked the Lord
for forgiveness.

1878
01:16:11,120 --> 01:16:13,600
But when you came
to the party and shut it down,

1879
01:16:13,680 --> 01:16:15,284
the frat guys got so mad.

1880
01:16:15,360 --> 01:16:16,885
And they wanted to prank you.

1881
01:16:16,960 --> 01:16:18,610
They hacked into the TV.

1882
01:16:18,680 --> 01:16:21,809
The lights. The plumbing.
That was all them.

1883
01:16:21,880 --> 01:16:24,376
I heard them talking about it
when the police came to shut it down.

1884
01:16:24,400 --> 01:16:27,643
And when you were in the car
and the zombies came out of the woods,

1885
01:16:27,720 --> 01:16:28,801
that was them.

1886
01:16:28,880 --> 01:16:29,927
[softly] Yes, ma'am.

1887
01:16:30,920 --> 01:16:32,285
[groans]

1888
01:16:32,360 --> 01:16:34,249
Come on, get some holy water. Come on.

1889
01:16:34,360 --> 01:16:36,124
[groaning]

1890
01:16:36,200 --> 01:16:38,043
Jesus working on her,
Hallelujah, Hallelujah.

1891
01:16:38,120 --> 01:16:39,690
- Now hold that.
- Hallelujah, Jesus.

1892
01:16:39,760 --> 01:16:42,650
No, no, them words is about to come
out of my mouth, but I'm in a church!

1893
01:16:42,720 --> 01:16:44,256
- Come on, now, hold it. Hold.
- You better...

1894
01:16:44,280 --> 01:16:45,770
[mumbles]

1895
01:16:45,840 --> 01:16:47,126
Oh, Lord.

1896
01:16:47,200 --> 01:16:49,407
Sorry, these words trying to
come up out of my...

1897
01:16:49,480 --> 01:16:53,007
Don't cuss, Madea, you in a church,
hold yourself. Don't cuss.

1898
01:16:53,080 --> 01:16:55,367
- I bind you, cussing demon!
- Bind him.

1899
01:16:55,440 --> 01:16:57,807
Cussing demon, I bind you!

1900
01:16:57,880 --> 01:17:00,042
You trying to tell me right now,

1901
01:17:00,120 --> 01:17:02,202
that that was them children
that did that?

1902
01:17:02,280 --> 01:17:04,647
To me? And the clown?

1903
01:17:04,720 --> 01:17:07,121
That was them.
And the movement in the attic.

1904
01:17:09,040 --> 01:17:10,326
I'm sorry, Miss Madea.

1905
01:17:10,400 --> 01:17:12,323
You ain't nowhere near
as sorry as them

1906
01:17:12,400 --> 01:17:14,256
frat boys about to be
for what they done did to me.

1907
01:17:14,280 --> 01:17:19,161
No, no, Miss Madea, Tiffany has
some responsibility in this, I'm sorry.

1908
01:17:19,280 --> 01:17:20,616
[Madea] I'm gonna tell you right now.

1909
01:17:20,640 --> 01:17:23,256
I'm going over there and I'm gonna burn
that place down. I'm going right now!

1910
01:17:23,280 --> 01:17:25,169
You just got saved, Miss Madea.

1911
01:17:25,240 --> 01:17:28,130
Sometimes getting saved
is like a bad perm, Reverend...

1912
01:17:28,200 --> 01:17:29,850
[male voice]
It just don't take.

1913
01:17:29,920 --> 01:17:31,400
[normal voice]
Now where them boys at?

1914
01:17:31,440 --> 01:17:32,736
I'm going over there
to get them right now.

1915
01:17:32,760 --> 01:17:34,171
Uh... Uh... Miss Madea...

1916
01:17:34,240 --> 01:17:35,296
Reverend, I know
you ain't grabbing on me.

1917
01:17:35,320 --> 01:17:36,401
I know you ain't...

1918
01:17:36,480 --> 01:17:37,845
Do you want them holy hands?

1919
01:17:37,920 --> 01:17:40,048
Do you want your holy hands, Reverend?

1920
01:17:40,120 --> 01:17:44,170
I think you just need to calm down.
The Bible says to turn the other cheek.

1921
01:17:44,240 --> 01:17:45,816
Yes, but the Bible
talks about these cheeks.

1922
01:17:45,840 --> 01:17:47,136
What about the cheeks
down at the bottom?

1923
01:17:47,160 --> 01:17:49,936
Those are the ones I'm going after
'cause I'm gonna tell you right now.

1924
01:17:49,960 --> 01:17:51,776
What they done did is just absolute,
flat-out wrong.

1925
01:17:51,800 --> 01:17:52,896
I'm going over there and set it off.

1926
01:17:52,920 --> 01:17:55,016
No, no, no. Miss Madea,
there's gotta be some other way

1927
01:17:55,040 --> 01:17:56,201
to teach them a lesson.

1928
01:17:56,280 --> 01:17:58,282
- [Hattie screaming]
- [crowd gasping]

1929
01:18:00,800 --> 01:18:02,325
[Barn]
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

1930
01:18:02,400 --> 01:18:04,289
Ma, you ain't had
to leave us like that.

1931
01:18:04,360 --> 01:18:05,646
I know y'all knew where to come.

1932
01:18:05,720 --> 01:18:07,296
They came straight to the church,
didn't they?

1933
01:18:07,320 --> 01:18:09,846
Listen. Hold on. I just
found out what happened.

1934
01:18:09,920 --> 01:18:11,729
It was them frat boys, but listen to me.

1935
01:18:11,800 --> 01:18:13,882
I got this. Rev, you might be right.

1936
01:18:14,000 --> 01:18:15,376
There might be something
we can go over there and do

1937
01:18:15,400 --> 01:18:16,925
- and get all this straight.
- Yes.

1938
01:18:17,000 --> 01:18:18,240
I got... I got an idea.

1939
01:18:18,320 --> 01:18:21,085
I'm going to try something
very different.

1940
01:18:21,160 --> 01:18:22,525
This is what we gonna do...

1941
01:18:26,120 --> 01:18:27,360
I oughta bust you...

1942
01:18:27,440 --> 01:18:28,816
[Madea] Joe, you ain't gonna
believe this.

1943
01:18:28,840 --> 01:18:30,216
You ain't gonna believe
what them frat boys did.

1944
01:18:30,240 --> 01:18:32,176
Yeah, I know everything.
I know everything, look here.

1945
01:18:32,200 --> 01:18:33,440
[Madea]
I... Hold the hell on.

1946
01:18:33,560 --> 01:18:34,971
[Joe] Look at him.

1947
01:18:35,040 --> 01:18:36,416
So y'all wanna play games
with old people, huh?

1948
01:18:36,440 --> 01:18:38,010
What is your name, son?

1949
01:18:38,080 --> 01:18:40,367
Urn, I'm Renaldo,
but everybody calls me Horse.

1950
01:18:40,440 --> 01:18:43,171
Horse? Ooh, can I ride?

1951
01:18:43,280 --> 01:18:45,009
- Hattie, please, damn.
- Hattie, hush.

1952
01:18:45,080 --> 01:18:46,496
[Joe] I'm gonna tell you
one more time, Hattie,

1953
01:18:46,520 --> 01:18:47,776
you keep talking to him like that,

1954
01:18:47,800 --> 01:18:50,201
you ain't getting no more
of this damn donkey.

1955
01:18:50,280 --> 01:18:53,363
So y'all like to play games, huh?
What is wrong with y'all?

1956
01:18:53,440 --> 01:18:55,761
I'm sorry, we don't wanna get
kicked out of school, please.

1957
01:18:55,840 --> 01:18:57,096
You worried about
getting kicked out of school,

1958
01:18:57,120 --> 01:18:58,485
you about to get your ass kicked.

1959
01:18:58,560 --> 01:19:00,136
I'm gonna get all this
straight right now.

1960
01:19:00,160 --> 01:19:02,367
Y'all wanna play these games?
I'm calling Brian.

1961
01:19:02,440 --> 01:19:04,363
- I'm calling right now.
- Yeah.

1962
01:19:04,440 --> 01:19:05,771
<i>[Brian]
Madea, how you doing?</i>

1963
01:19:05,840 --> 01:19:08,286
Brian, you ain't gonna never believe
what your daughter did.

1964
01:19:08,360 --> 01:19:09,805
I need you to come home right now.

1965
01:19:09,880 --> 01:19:11,006
<i>Madea, I don't...</i>

1966
01:19:11,080 --> 01:19:13,176
I don't care what you're doing,
if you don't get here right now,

1967
01:19:13,200 --> 01:19:14,611
you ain't gonna have no house.

1968
01:19:14,680 --> 01:19:16,016
- Yes, we gonna get it.
- No, I'm good.

1969
01:19:16,040 --> 01:19:17,246
- Right now.
- <i>Okay,</i> great.

1970
01:19:21,400 --> 01:19:22,936
And then she just snuck up
out of this house.

1971
01:19:22,960 --> 01:19:25,176
That's exactly what she...
Snuck up out of this house, Brian.

1972
01:19:25,200 --> 01:19:26,964
I cannot believe that...

1973
01:19:27,040 --> 01:19:29,520
I think that you need to just
shut the hell up and listen, boy.

1974
01:19:29,560 --> 01:19:32,296
Right. You need to get that girl to
come down here and put your foot down.

1975
01:19:32,320 --> 01:19:33,856
Okay. All right.
But what do I say to her?

1976
01:19:33,880 --> 01:19:35,896
You grab her by the throat,
you say, "Look here, you little..."

1977
01:19:35,920 --> 01:19:37,656
Daddy, if you say something
bad about my daughter...

1978
01:19:37,680 --> 01:19:39,762
Joe, don't you call that child
no bad name, hush.

1979
01:19:39,840 --> 01:19:41,001
Call her.

1980
01:19:41,080 --> 01:19:43,576
[Madea] You need to call her down here
and set this thing straight.

1981
01:19:43,600 --> 01:19:45,921
Get this child in order,
she is running all over you.

1982
01:19:46,000 --> 01:19:47,161
You need to get her in order.

1983
01:19:47,240 --> 01:19:49,720
- Okay. Tiffany!
- [Tiffany] What?

1984
01:19:49,800 --> 01:19:52,167
Honey, can you come downstairs, please?

1985
01:19:52,240 --> 01:19:53,480
What the hell you doing?

1986
01:19:53,600 --> 01:19:55,921
Boy, what the hell wrong with you?
Call her from your nuts.

1987
01:19:56,000 --> 01:19:57,365
[Bam exclaims]

1988
01:19:57,440 --> 01:20:01,001
Well, now that may be how it sounds,
Joe, 'cause, he only got one.

1989
01:20:01,080 --> 01:20:02,684
[laughs]

1990
01:20:02,760 --> 01:20:04,842
Boy, I'm trying to help you.
I'm trying to help you.

1991
01:20:04,920 --> 01:20:07,161
You're sitting here
like a little me-otch.

1992
01:20:07,280 --> 01:20:09,567
Stop using that language
in my house, okay?

1993
01:20:09,640 --> 01:20:12,246
Listen up, everybody here.
I'll try this my way,

1994
01:20:12,320 --> 01:20:16,245
and if it doesn't work,
then I will resort to 1938,

1995
01:20:16,320 --> 01:20:19,210
where you beat the hell out of your kids
and everything was okay.

1996
01:20:19,280 --> 01:20:20,805
All right? I'll get arrested.

1997
01:20:20,880 --> 01:20:22,564
I'll have warrants.
I'll be like you guys.

1998
01:20:22,640 --> 01:20:24,616
I'm running from the police.
I'm running from the po-po.

1999
01:20:24,640 --> 01:20:26,210
I don't live that way.

2000
01:20:26,280 --> 01:20:29,887
Nigga. Nigga. Your way ain't never work.

2001
01:20:29,960 --> 01:20:32,176
We trying to tell you the way
we did it in the old school.

2002
01:20:32,200 --> 01:20:33,884
All this new shit ain't working.

2003
01:20:33,960 --> 01:20:35,880
That's why all these children
killing each other.

2004
01:20:35,920 --> 01:20:38,296
That's why all these children
ain't got no respect for nobody.

2005
01:20:38,320 --> 01:20:40,209
This new shit don't work.

2006
01:20:40,280 --> 01:20:41,611
Tiffany!

2007
01:20:41,680 --> 01:20:44,200
Tell her you better get your ass down
them steps right damn now.

2008
01:20:45,440 --> 01:20:49,525
Get down these stairs right now,
your dad would like to talk to you,

2009
01:20:49,600 --> 01:20:53,002
have a conversation about some of
your behavior, young lady.

2010
01:20:53,080 --> 01:20:56,209
Find your way down these stairs,
right now.

2011
01:21:01,120 --> 01:21:03,202
Look, she's coming. See? Duh.

2012
01:21:08,000 --> 01:21:09,206
What?

2013
01:21:09,280 --> 01:21:10,964
Girl, did that child say, "What"?

2014
01:21:11,040 --> 01:21:12,336
Oh, somebody help me,
y'all better hold me.

2015
01:21:12,360 --> 01:21:13,441
Somebody better hold me.

2016
01:21:13,520 --> 01:21:16,524
Tiffany, hear me clearly
and answer this question, okay?

2017
01:21:16,640 --> 01:21:20,201
Be very careful with your answer.
All right?

2018
01:21:23,000 --> 01:21:25,480
'Cause your life may depend on it. Um...

2019
01:21:25,560 --> 01:21:27,050
Did you sneak out of this house

2020
01:21:27,120 --> 01:21:29,521
and go to that frat party
after I told you not to?

2021
01:21:30,440 --> 01:21:31,601
So What if I did?

2022
01:21:31,680 --> 01:21:33,409
I told you not to go.

2023
01:21:33,480 --> 01:21:36,051
Mmm. So I did. Get over it.

2024
01:21:37,520 --> 01:21:41,411
If you don't snatch that heifer up
by her new growth and sling her

2025
01:21:41,480 --> 01:21:43,448
through the air like
a helicopter, you better...

2026
01:21:43,520 --> 01:21:45,966
Where are you going,
I'm talking to you.

2027
01:21:46,040 --> 01:21:49,123
I'm done talking to you.
I'm going back to bed.

2028
01:21:49,200 --> 01:21:50,611
Oh, my God.

2029
01:21:50,680 --> 01:21:52,648
Jesus, fix him.

2030
01:21:52,760 --> 01:21:54,524
Okay.
[blows raspberry]

2031
01:21:54,600 --> 01:21:55,696
I tried, that's it, I tried.

2032
01:21:55,720 --> 01:21:57,484
- I did what I could do.
- Our turn.

2033
01:21:57,560 --> 01:21:59,210
No, no, hold on.
What're you gonna do?

2034
01:21:59,280 --> 01:22:00,696
You tell her,
"Baby, if you think you're grown,

2035
01:22:00,720 --> 01:22:02,896
you're gonna have to get your ass
out of here and go get you a job."

2036
01:22:02,920 --> 01:22:05,616
Don't no child supposed to be up in
your house talking to you like that.

2037
01:22:05,640 --> 01:22:07,244
The house where you pay all the bills.

2038
01:22:07,320 --> 01:22:08,560
What the hell is wrong with you

2039
01:22:08,640 --> 01:22:10,696
letting this child talk to you
like that? She got to...

2040
01:22:10,720 --> 01:22:11,816
[male voice]
She got to get her ass...

2041
01:22:11,840 --> 01:22:13,800
[normal voice]
She got to get her ass out of here.

2042
01:22:13,840 --> 01:22:18,971
I am not putting my 17-year-old daughter
out of the house on the streets

2043
01:22:19,040 --> 01:22:20,929
so she can do
all kinds of criminal things.

2044
01:22:21,000 --> 01:22:22,320
She's not gonna grow up like you.

2045
01:22:23,560 --> 01:22:24,800
She's not gonna grow up like...

2046
01:22:27,720 --> 01:22:31,088
Other people have done.
I'm not doing it.

2047
01:22:31,160 --> 01:22:32,496
What's the worst that
can happen to her?

2048
01:22:32,520 --> 01:22:35,251
Turn to prostitution? Drugs?
End up in the bus station,

2049
01:22:35,320 --> 01:22:36,816
some pimp pick her up
and put her out on the street

2050
01:22:36,840 --> 01:22:37,966
pimping her out for years?

2051
01:22:38,040 --> 01:22:41,203
Hell, how you think I met your mama?

2052
01:22:41,280 --> 01:22:44,045
You can't put her out?
Oh, you can't put her out?

2053
01:22:44,120 --> 01:22:45,281
Oh, oh, you can't.

2054
01:22:45,360 --> 01:22:47,089
Is it too tough for you
to put her out?

2055
01:22:47,160 --> 01:22:49,128
You're such a nice man,
you can't put her out.

2056
01:22:49,200 --> 01:22:50,361
I'll put her ass out.

2057
01:22:50,440 --> 01:22:52,204
- And me, too.
- They swigging on

2058
01:22:52,320 --> 01:22:53,736
- testosterone and all them...
- Y'all go on, go on. Come on.

2059
01:22:53,760 --> 01:22:55,096
Come on, y'all come on.
Let's go. Move!

2060
01:22:55,120 --> 01:22:57,216
Wait a minute, what are you doing,
what are you doing with my daughter?

2061
01:22:57,240 --> 01:22:59,971
What... Hold on. Just...
What are you gonna do

2062
01:23:00,040 --> 01:23:01,416
when you get up here
is what I wanna know.

2063
01:23:01,440 --> 01:23:03,363
[indistinct shouting]

2064
01:23:03,440 --> 01:23:05,807
[Madea] Turn the damn lights on,
turn them on right now.

2065
01:23:05,880 --> 01:23:07,689
Get your tail up out of that bed!

2066
01:23:07,760 --> 01:23:09,683
[grunts]
What the...

2067
01:23:09,760 --> 01:23:11,569
Go ahead! Finish your statement

2068
01:23:11,640 --> 01:23:13,722
so I can bust your head
to the white meat.

2069
01:23:13,840 --> 01:23:15,776
Yeah, that's right,
she's gonna bust it to the white meat,

2070
01:23:15,800 --> 01:23:17,376
and I'm gonna bust it
to your damn cranium.

2071
01:23:17,400 --> 01:23:18,600
Say what you was about to say.

2072
01:23:18,680 --> 01:23:21,251
Let them words fall up
out of your lips, little girl.

2073
01:23:23,120 --> 01:23:25,202
Oh, no... No, what are you
doing with my stuff?

2074
01:23:25,280 --> 01:23:28,523
No, no, these are not your things.
Your things is what you go in the store

2075
01:23:28,600 --> 01:23:30,568
and you pay for with
your hard-earned money.

2076
01:23:30,640 --> 01:23:33,689
Your daddy bought all this stuff,
so don't none of this belong to you.

2077
01:23:33,760 --> 01:23:36,684
This is called borrowed stuff.
Rented. Do you understand?

2078
01:23:36,760 --> 01:23:38,091
This don't belong to you.

2079
01:23:38,200 --> 01:23:41,090
Oh, I like this right here!

2080
01:23:41,200 --> 01:23:43,089
Oh, yes, I love it!

2081
01:23:43,160 --> 01:23:45,447
- [Madea] You can have it.
- No, you can't, that's mine!

2082
01:23:45,520 --> 01:23:48,285
Oh, try to take it. Try to take it.

2083
01:23:48,360 --> 01:23:51,091
I wanna see her do that, babe.
Please try to take it from Bam.

2084
01:23:51,160 --> 01:23:53,766
Please try to take it from her.

2085
01:23:53,880 --> 01:23:56,770
What is wrong with you old people?

2086
01:23:56,840 --> 01:23:58,136
[Madea]
Say that one more damn time.

2087
01:23:58,160 --> 01:24:01,209
Your daddy works hard, day and night,
to buy all this stuff for you,

2088
01:24:01,280 --> 01:24:02,976
and you gonna sit up here
with all this attitude?

2089
01:24:03,000 --> 01:24:04,570
- Baby, you got to go.
- Go where?

2090
01:24:04,640 --> 01:24:07,291
I don't know but you've got to
get the hell up out of here.

2091
01:24:08,280 --> 01:24:10,009
- Dad.
- No, no...

2092
01:24:10,080 --> 01:24:11,616
He ain't gonna say nothing.
I wish he would say something.

2093
01:24:11,640 --> 01:24:14,096
Brian, say something, so I can
bust you in the back of your damn head.

2094
01:24:14,120 --> 01:24:15,240
Please say something to her.

2095
01:24:15,320 --> 01:24:16,685
I like this thing right here.

2096
01:24:16,760 --> 01:24:18,336
I can rock this
like the young people say.

2097
01:24:18,360 --> 01:24:19,930
I can rock these.

2098
01:24:20,000 --> 01:24:22,048
Where you going to rock it?
On your damn ankle, Bam?

2099
01:24:22,160 --> 01:24:24,447
Give me that damn
pair of pants, you think...

2100
01:24:24,520 --> 01:24:26,124
That is mine.

2101
01:24:26,200 --> 01:24:27,486
Try and take it from me.

2102
01:24:27,560 --> 01:24:28,891
[grunts] Dad!

2103
01:24:29,000 --> 01:24:30,570
[stuttering]
Uh, don't look at me.

2104
01:24:30,640 --> 01:24:32,642
See, that is the problem.

2105
01:24:32,720 --> 01:24:34,609
Okay, you're always
letting people run over you.

2106
01:24:34,680 --> 01:24:38,002
You let Mom run over you,
you let her husband run over you.

2107
01:24:38,080 --> 01:24:40,162
- You let me run over you.
- [Madea] Uh-oh.

2108
01:24:40,240 --> 01:24:42,208
There it is. I knew she was
angry about something.

2109
01:24:42,280 --> 01:24:44,216
Something hit that nerve.
There it is, what happened?

2110
01:24:44,240 --> 01:24:46,925
Your morn did not
run over me, Tiffany.

2111
01:24:47,000 --> 01:24:50,721
Oh, so her having an affair in this
house isn't her running over you?

2112
01:24:50,800 --> 01:24:52,656
Brian, I believe that's
running over you, right there.

2113
01:24:52,680 --> 01:24:54,091
I believe that's running over you.

2114
01:24:55,200 --> 01:24:56,440
You know about that?

2115
01:24:56,520 --> 01:24:58,010
Of course I know about that, okay?

2116
01:24:58,080 --> 01:25:00,128
Do you know that Morn
has no respect for you?

2117
01:25:00,240 --> 01:25:03,050
When are you gonna start
standing up for yourself?

2118
01:25:03,160 --> 01:25:05,970
You know what, you're right.
You're absolutely right.

2119
01:25:06,040 --> 01:25:07,963
I'm gonna start standing up for myself.

2120
01:25:08,080 --> 01:25:09,320
Right now. Right now.

2121
01:25:09,400 --> 01:25:11,164
- Pack it up.
- Yep!

2122
01:25:11,240 --> 01:25:13,016
- Everything. Let's pack it up.
- Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

2123
01:25:13,040 --> 01:25:14,696
That's it, Brian.
Pack her stuff up. Pack it up!

2124
01:25:14,720 --> 01:25:16,449
Okay, this has to be a joke.

2125
01:25:16,520 --> 01:25:18,966
No, I'm not joking at all.
I'm telling you right now.

2126
01:25:19,040 --> 01:25:21,576
You obviously know everything that
went on between me and your mother,

2127
01:25:21,600 --> 01:25:22,776
you know everything that happened.

2128
01:25:22,800 --> 01:25:24,856
Forgive me for trying to
protect you and your brother

2129
01:25:24,880 --> 01:25:25,961
from what was going on.

2130
01:25:26,040 --> 01:25:28,736
From trying to protect you from the pain
that was happening in this house.

2131
01:25:28,760 --> 01:25:32,526
Listen to me. It takes a stronger person
to leave a situation

2132
01:25:32,600 --> 01:25:35,490
than it is to stay and fight
in a situation that's not worth it.

2133
01:25:35,560 --> 01:25:37,927
Do you understand what I'm telling you?
Obviously you don't.

2134
01:25:38,000 --> 01:25:40,446
So you clearly don't appreciate
anything that I've ever done.

2135
01:25:40,520 --> 01:25:42,409
So it's time for you to go.
You got to go!

2136
01:25:42,800 --> 01:25:44,325
Go where?

2137
01:25:44,400 --> 01:25:46,368
I don't know.
But it's obvious you're grown.

2138
01:25:46,440 --> 01:25:47,771
You can make your own decisions.

2139
01:25:47,840 --> 01:25:49,536
If you cannot abide
by the rules in this house,

2140
01:25:49,560 --> 01:25:52,166
then you are not allowed here.
Do you understand?

2141
01:25:52,240 --> 01:25:54,049
Don't cry. Tiffany,
I can't do the tears.

2142
01:25:54,120 --> 01:25:56,487
I'm not gonna do the tears.
I've had enough of this.

2143
01:25:56,560 --> 01:25:57,607
I've had enough.

2144
01:26:06,320 --> 01:26:07,526
Okay.

2145
01:26:07,640 --> 01:26:10,405
I love you.
Do you understand that?

2146
01:26:10,480 --> 01:26:13,086
But you have to abide
by the rules in this house.

2147
01:26:13,160 --> 01:26:16,721
If I say it, you have to abide by it.
Do you understand?

2148
01:26:16,800 --> 01:26:20,521
I know you're a teenager. I know that
a lot's going on. And listen to me,

2149
01:26:20,600 --> 01:26:22,170
I want you to go out
and live your life.

2150
01:26:22,280 --> 01:26:23,566
I want you to make mistakes.

2151
01:26:23,640 --> 01:26:25,016
But I don't want you
to make any mistakes

2152
01:26:25,040 --> 01:26:27,691
that's gonna cause you
to ruin your life.

2153
01:26:27,760 --> 01:26:29,280
You shouldn't have gone to that party.

2154
01:26:29,320 --> 01:26:31,368
Anything could have happened
to you over there.

2155
01:26:31,440 --> 01:26:33,283
I'm not trying to run your life.

2156
01:26:33,360 --> 01:26:35,681
I'm trying to protect you
as your father.

2157
01:26:35,760 --> 01:26:40,163
And if you cannot understand that,
then you have to go. ls that clear?

2158
01:26:40,240 --> 01:26:42,242
- Okay.
- So tell me right now.

2159
01:26:42,320 --> 01:26:45,005
Are you staying in this house
and abiding by my rules

2160
01:26:45,080 --> 01:26:47,242
or are we all gonna
put you out of here?

2161
01:26:47,320 --> 01:26:49,163
I'm staying. I'm listening to you.

2162
01:26:49,240 --> 01:26:51,004
- Apologize.
- I'm sorry, Dad.

2163
01:26:51,080 --> 01:26:53,731
- Mean it.
- I'm sorry.

2164
01:26:56,480 --> 01:26:59,529
I still think you need to whoop her ass.

2165
01:26:59,840 --> 01:27:01,808
One good time.

2166
01:27:02,720 --> 01:27:04,085
[Madea] All right. Listen.

2167
01:27:04,160 --> 01:27:05,856
Little girl, let me explain
something to you, honey.

2168
01:27:05,880 --> 01:27:08,451
That's what parents be trying to do.
Set you on the right path.

2169
01:27:08,520 --> 01:27:11,285
Parents aren't perfect.
They make all kinds of mistakes.

2170
01:27:11,360 --> 01:27:12,736
And when you start trying
to make them perfect,

2171
01:27:12,760 --> 01:27:15,411
you mess up thinking that they are.
They are not God.

2172
01:27:15,480 --> 01:27:18,245
They are parents.
And they try to do the best for you.

2173
01:27:18,320 --> 01:27:19,736
And you sitting there
and I know you're mad

2174
01:27:19,760 --> 01:27:20,856
at your mama for what she did

2175
01:27:20,880 --> 01:27:22,216
and you're mad at your daddy
for him not standing up.

2176
01:27:22,240 --> 01:27:23,526
All that is clear, honey.

2177
01:27:23,600 --> 01:27:25,416
But what you need to
understand about that is this.

2178
01:27:25,440 --> 01:27:27,936
Forgive your mama, forgive your daddy,
for the things they didn't know

2179
01:27:27,960 --> 01:27:29,246
and you help them figure it out.

2180
01:27:29,320 --> 01:27:31,209
Since you wanna act like you so grown.

2181
01:27:31,280 --> 01:27:32,327
You understand?

2182
01:27:32,920 --> 01:27:34,285
Yes.

2183
01:27:34,360 --> 01:27:36,840
And I'm gonna tell you right now,
I'm mad as hell at you

2184
01:27:36,920 --> 01:27:39,800
for letting them frat boys come up
in here and trick me up in this house.

2185
01:27:39,840 --> 01:27:42,650
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

2186
01:27:42,720 --> 01:27:44,165
[knocking]

2187
01:27:44,240 --> 01:27:45,480
Uh-oh. That's the po-po.

2188
01:27:45,560 --> 01:27:47,608
I know the po-po knock anywhere.

2189
01:27:47,680 --> 01:27:49,569
- It probably is.
- Lord have mercy.

2190
01:27:49,640 --> 01:27:51,642
Well, Brian. Go open the door.

2191
01:27:51,720 --> 01:27:53,802
Yeah. Of course you want me
to get the door.

2192
01:27:53,880 --> 01:27:55,325
I'm the only one without a warrant.

2193
01:27:57,520 --> 01:27:59,409
- We're not done talking.
- [knocking continues]

2194
01:27:59,480 --> 01:28:00,606
[Hattie] Police at the door.

2195
01:28:00,680 --> 01:28:04,844
But, Brian, I've got a prescription.
I'm still legal.

2196
01:28:04,920 --> 01:28:06,410
Let's go see what's going on.

2197
01:28:08,280 --> 01:28:12,569
Yeah. Who is it? Officer.
What's going on?

2198
01:28:12,680 --> 01:28:15,286
- We need your daughter, Tiffany.
- Tiffany? For what?

2199
01:28:15,880 --> 01:28:17,120
What is going on?

2200
01:28:17,200 --> 01:28:18,376
- What'd you do?
- I didn't do anything.

2201
01:28:18,400 --> 01:28:21,324
- You know Aday Walker?
- Yeah.

2202
01:28:21,440 --> 01:28:23,363
When was the last time
you talked to her?

2203
01:28:23,440 --> 01:28:24,646
Um, last night.

2204
01:28:24,720 --> 01:28:27,087
- She was with you at the frat house?
- Yeah.

2205
01:28:27,160 --> 01:28:29,322
- Wait a minute, what's going on?
- Come on.

2206
01:28:29,400 --> 01:28:31,402
No, no, no, no.
Until you tell me what's going on,

2207
01:28:31,480 --> 01:28:32,641
she's not going anywhere.

2208
01:28:32,720 --> 01:28:33,846
Sir, this girl is missing.

2209
01:28:33,920 --> 01:28:35,843
- What?
- And we need to find her.

2210
01:28:35,920 --> 01:28:37,763
Her parents are worried sick.

2211
01:28:37,840 --> 01:28:39,171
Go on with them.

2212
01:28:39,240 --> 01:28:40,576
- What? Dad, no!
- Yeah, go on with them.

2213
01:28:40,600 --> 01:28:42,762
I'm right behind you, okay? Go on.

2214
01:28:42,840 --> 01:28:44,365
- Go on.
- Dad.

2215
01:28:44,440 --> 01:28:46,329
[officer] Come on.

2216
01:28:46,400 --> 01:28:48,528
You gonna put handcuffs on her?

2217
01:28:48,600 --> 01:28:50,489
I'm right behind you,
let me get my keys.

2218
01:28:55,440 --> 01:28:56,726
[knocking on door]

2219
01:28:56,800 --> 01:28:59,280
[Jonathan]
Go home! Come back next year.

2220
01:29:00,520 --> 01:29:03,171
Peasants, the party's over!

2221
01:29:03,240 --> 01:29:04,320
[officer 1]
Police! Open up!

2222
01:29:04,400 --> 01:29:06,129
Oh, God. Oh, no, no, no.

2223
01:29:06,200 --> 01:29:07,456
What do they want?
What do they want?

2224
01:29:07,480 --> 01:29:09,323
- What do they want?
- We don't know.

2225
01:29:09,400 --> 01:29:13,564
Dino knows. It's about that 17-year-old
charlatan from last night.

2226
01:29:13,640 --> 01:29:15,847
You shut up, Dino.

2227
01:29:15,920 --> 01:29:17,456
Clean up. Clean up.
Put it in the basement.

2228
01:29:17,480 --> 01:29:18,527
[indistinct chatter]

2229
01:29:21,520 --> 01:29:22,726
[knocking continues]

2230
01:29:23,680 --> 01:29:25,682
[officer 1] Police! Open up!

2231
01:29:48,600 --> 01:29:49,806
[knocking continues]

2232
01:29:49,880 --> 01:29:51,405
[officer 1] Open up! Now!

2233
01:29:51,480 --> 01:29:53,403
- What's wrong with you?
- [Horse] What?

2234
01:29:55,640 --> 01:29:56,800
- Talk.
- [Horse] Spit it out.

2235
01:29:57,920 --> 01:29:59,763
Go. Go.

2236
01:29:59,840 --> 01:30:01,330
[man] What now?

2237
01:30:01,400 --> 01:30:03,562
Come on, cops again?

2238
01:30:03,640 --> 01:30:05,563
- [officer 1] Open up!
- [Dino] Worst party ever.

2239
01:30:19,480 --> 01:30:23,246
Let's get out of here.
Go. Let's go, let's go, go.

2240
01:30:23,640 --> 01:30:25,244
[knocking continues]

2241
01:30:25,320 --> 01:30:27,056
[officer 1] This is your
last chance to open the door.

2242
01:30:27,080 --> 01:30:28,650
What the hell?

2243
01:30:31,080 --> 01:30:33,526
- She disappeared last night.
- Nobody saw her?

2244
01:30:33,600 --> 01:30:35,967
- Dino. Dino. Dino. Dino.
- No. No. No.

2245
01:30:36,040 --> 01:30:37,610
Dino! Dino!

2246
01:30:37,680 --> 01:30:39,364
- This dude was with her.
- No! Nothing.

2247
01:30:39,440 --> 01:30:40,487
What'd you do?

2248
01:30:40,560 --> 01:30:41,641
<i>[door slams]</i>

2249
01:30:41,720 --> 01:30:43,131
[Dino] Wasn't me!

2250
01:30:43,200 --> 01:30:46,010
Police! We got a warrant
to search these premises.

2251
01:30:46,080 --> 01:30:49,289
Everybody outside.
Handcuffed. Let's go.

2252
01:30:49,360 --> 01:30:51,362
- We didn't do anything.
- Let's go! Let's go!

2253
01:30:51,440 --> 01:30:53,363
Everybody outside.

2254
01:30:54,760 --> 01:30:56,410
[officer 2] Come on.

2255
01:30:56,480 --> 01:30:57,481
Keep it moving.

2256
01:31:04,600 --> 01:31:08,685
[officer 3] Rain Matheson,
Leah Devero. And she was here.

2257
01:31:08,760 --> 01:31:11,001
And she's underage just like this girl.

2258
01:31:11,080 --> 01:31:12,525
You know that.

2259
01:31:12,600 --> 01:31:15,524
Did you bring those girls up here
and you knew they were underage?

2260
01:31:15,600 --> 01:31:17,284
No, no. We just invited them.

2261
01:31:17,360 --> 01:31:18,600
But we didn't know their age.

2262
01:31:18,680 --> 01:31:20,364
- We didn't know anything.
- Yes, you did.

2263
01:31:20,440 --> 01:31:22,442
Both them girls
know damn well she is underage.

2264
01:31:22,520 --> 01:31:24,807
She underage.
And you took her down to that party.

2265
01:31:24,880 --> 01:31:26,856
That's right. That's why
you're in trouble right now.

2266
01:31:26,880 --> 01:31:28,405
- No.
- Stop that damn lying.

2267
01:31:28,480 --> 01:31:30,616
You've been friends with her
since y'all was in the fourth grade.

2268
01:31:30,640 --> 01:31:32,449
How the hell you ain't know
how old she was?

2269
01:31:32,520 --> 01:31:34,640
- We swear. We didn't know.
- We didn't know anything.

2270
01:31:34,680 --> 01:31:37,570
- It was them. I saw it.
- Shut up, Jonathan.

2271
01:31:37,640 --> 01:31:39,483
We found a body in the basement.

2272
01:31:39,560 --> 01:31:40,656
[Reverend] ls it my daughter?

2273
01:31:40,680 --> 01:31:41,966
[Alice] No, no, not Aday.

2274
01:31:42,040 --> 01:31:45,965
We are waiting on the medical examiner,
but you can identify the body.

2275
01:31:46,040 --> 01:31:48,136
See, that's what your daddy
was trying to tell you, honey.

2276
01:31:48,160 --> 01:31:49,656
This is what I was trying
to get you to understand.

2277
01:31:49,680 --> 01:31:51,696
Your parents ain't lame
'cause they tell you not to go out.

2278
01:31:51,720 --> 01:31:53,290
Not to be texting and driving.

2279
01:31:53,400 --> 01:31:55,323
All that stuff is bad.
Y'all kill people.

2280
01:31:55,400 --> 01:31:58,609
And now this girl is up in there dead.
She is dead. She dead.

2281
01:31:58,680 --> 01:32:00,921
Y'all are under arrest
for the murder of Aday Walker.

2282
01:32:01,000 --> 01:32:03,048
[all pleading indistinctly]

2283
01:32:03,160 --> 01:32:04,400
It was them! It was them!

2284
01:32:04,480 --> 01:32:07,165
Dad, I'm sorry. Dad, help me.

2285
01:32:07,240 --> 01:32:08,960
Listen, I'm sorry.
There's nothing I can do.

2286
01:32:09,000 --> 01:32:11,924
- I didn't do anything.
- I will do my best to get you out.

2287
01:32:12,000 --> 01:32:13,889
I don't know if I can, but I'll try.

2288
01:32:17,520 --> 01:32:19,602
[male prisoner 1]
Big, strong boys.

2289
01:32:19,720 --> 01:32:22,803
Hey, yep. Y'all finna get it. Yeah.

2290
01:32:22,880 --> 01:32:24,211
[Jonathan crying]

2291
01:32:24,280 --> 01:32:25,816
[male prisoner 2]
I like the cryin' baby.

2292
01:32:25,840 --> 01:32:27,000
[female prisoner]
Who is this?

2293
01:32:27,040 --> 01:32:28,849
[Jonathan continues crying]

2294
01:32:29,680 --> 01:32:31,091
Who cryin'?

2295
01:32:31,160 --> 01:32:33,606
Homie, you gonna hug
a man from the back.

2296
01:32:33,680 --> 01:32:36,650
Nothing wrong with that though.
Good hugging in the shower.

2297
01:32:36,720 --> 01:32:39,769
Soap flying everywhere.
So romantic.

2298
01:32:39,840 --> 01:32:41,604
[whimpers and cries]

2299
01:32:41,680 --> 01:32:43,256
So you killed her
and you crying about it?

2300
01:32:43,280 --> 01:32:45,089
We didn't kill her. I promise.

2301
01:32:45,160 --> 01:32:47,561
There's a dead body,
you're on the bus with us.

2302
01:32:47,640 --> 01:32:49,130
This is messed up, bro.

2303
01:32:49,200 --> 01:32:51,931
Hold tight. Be quiet.
And we'll be back.

2304
01:32:52,000 --> 01:32:53,331
These are your new friends.

2305
01:32:53,400 --> 01:32:55,096
Ain't gonna be no more
frat parties and stuff.

2306
01:32:55,120 --> 01:32:58,408
'Cause y'all killed a girl
and you're going down for it.

2307
01:32:58,480 --> 01:33:00,608
Who is this?

2308
01:33:00,720 --> 01:33:02,768
[officer 3]
Treat her nice. She is a minor.

2309
01:33:02,840 --> 01:33:04,808
But those two, they are 18.

2310
01:33:04,880 --> 01:33:06,803
- Who?
- No, we're not. No, no.

2311
01:33:06,880 --> 01:33:09,360
No, no, no. That's not us.

2312
01:33:09,440 --> 01:33:12,330
I sure would like to
twist your hair, girl.

2313
01:33:12,440 --> 01:33:14,136
- No, no. I don't like braids.
- [Leah] Me either.

2314
01:33:14,160 --> 01:33:16,811
They're not a cute look.

2315
01:33:16,880 --> 01:33:18,848
My hair doesn't twist, I swear.

2316
01:33:18,920 --> 01:33:21,082
It's just really straight,
and, like, bendy,

2317
01:33:21,160 --> 01:33:22,844
and it's really not cute on me.

2318
01:33:22,920 --> 01:33:24,576
[female prisoner]
Well, you can twist mine, baby.

2319
01:33:24,600 --> 01:33:27,126
No, no.
Our manicures won't let us twist.

2320
01:33:27,200 --> 01:33:31,000
- They'd get caught.
- I'm sorry, miss. Uh...

2321
01:33:31,080 --> 01:33:33,003
My name is Walter.

2322
01:33:33,080 --> 01:33:35,765
Oh, my God, this just
keeps getting worse.

2323
01:33:35,880 --> 01:33:40,568
Wait, wait, wait.
That's my momma and my daddy.

2324
01:33:40,640 --> 01:33:45,680
Momma, daddy.
No, wait, wait. That's my sister.

2325
01:33:46,120 --> 01:33:49,249
- You killed my sister!
- No, no, no. They're black.

2326
01:33:49,320 --> 01:33:51,243
They're not even related to you!

2327
01:33:52,080 --> 01:33:53,730
[people screaming]

2328
01:33:56,920 --> 01:33:58,922
Lord have mercy.
[laughs]

2329
01:34:01,440 --> 01:34:02,521
Ooh!

2330
01:34:04,360 --> 01:34:07,409
Hey, baby. Lord have mercy.

2331
01:34:07,480 --> 01:34:10,086
- How did I do as a cop?
- You did all right, baby,

2332
01:34:10,160 --> 01:34:12,216
but I don't want you to have
to run after nobody here.

2333
01:34:12,240 --> 01:34:14,280
'Cause I don't know if you
gonna be able to keep up.

2334
01:34:18,720 --> 01:34:21,451
You know damn well I ain't the police.
I couldn't be the police.

2335
01:34:21,520 --> 01:34:23,409
I know. Hell, your record
longer than mine.

2336
01:34:23,480 --> 01:34:25,136
You calling me
'cause you're getting robbed,

2337
01:34:25,160 --> 01:34:26,400
I might rob your ass, too.

2338
01:34:26,480 --> 01:34:28,016
- I ain't the real police.
- [Madea laughs]

2339
01:34:28,040 --> 01:34:29,530
[screaming continues]

2340
01:34:35,320 --> 01:34:36,765
I want that little Jonathan to see

2341
01:34:36,840 --> 01:34:38,600
what it feel like
to get pranked by somebody.

2342
01:34:38,640 --> 01:34:40,722
Since he always doing all
the damn pranking.

2343
01:34:40,800 --> 01:34:41,961
- [growling]
- [chuckles]

2344
01:34:42,040 --> 01:34:44,850
They're touching me. Please!

2345
01:34:44,920 --> 01:34:47,730
I don't know, guys.
This is just wrong.

2346
01:34:50,000 --> 01:34:52,296
Look, come on, now, Madea,
this is enough. Let's help them.

2347
01:34:52,320 --> 01:34:54,004
[crying]

2348
01:34:54,400 --> 01:34:55,936
Maybe you better watch out
for that little one.

2349
01:34:55,960 --> 01:34:58,000
He look like he getting ready
to get raped for real.

2350
01:34:58,360 --> 01:35:00,176
Go and get 'em off the bus.
He'll be all right.

2351
01:35:00,200 --> 01:35:02,806
Go and get 'em off the bus.
But take your time.

2352
01:35:08,160 --> 01:35:09,571
Hell, I'm enjoying this!

2353
01:35:09,680 --> 01:35:11,489
- [bus honking]
- [officer 3] Y'all, sit down.

2354
01:35:11,600 --> 01:35:13,682
All the little killers, come on.
Y'all come on.

2355
01:35:13,760 --> 01:35:15,680
Aday, come on out here, baby.
Rise from the dead.

2356
01:35:15,720 --> 01:35:17,643
Jesus, say Lazarus, please come up.

2357
01:35:17,720 --> 01:35:19,768
- Coming, Miss Madea.
- Thank you!

2358
01:35:19,840 --> 01:35:21,683
Hey, she come up from the...

2359
01:35:21,760 --> 01:35:24,809
Did good with that makeup, girl.
Just all bloody.

2360
01:35:24,960 --> 01:35:27,201
Come on, keep walking.
And hurry up.

2361
01:35:27,280 --> 01:35:30,363
Oh, no. Shh, shh. Here they come.
Here they come. Stand there like Carrie.

2362
01:35:31,800 --> 01:35:32,926
[Jonathan crying]

2363
01:35:33,000 --> 01:35:36,129
[officer 3] Keep walking. Come on.
Don't say nothing. Keep walking.

2364
01:35:36,200 --> 01:35:37,884
See, no... No hugs necessary.

2365
01:35:38,000 --> 01:35:39,696
- [Jonathan] I love you so...
- Just keep walking.

2366
01:35:39,720 --> 01:35:42,644
You are so wrong for that.

2367
01:35:42,720 --> 01:35:45,087
I know. But I'm alive.

2368
01:35:45,160 --> 01:35:48,243
I know. I'm sorry. So sorry.

2369
01:35:49,760 --> 01:35:52,923
- I'm so glad to see you.
- Don't do that to us again.

2370
01:35:53,000 --> 01:35:56,163
I hope you learned your lesson.
I hope all of you learned your lesson.

2371
01:35:56,240 --> 01:35:59,562
- This is just wrong.
- Trust me, sir. We did.

2372
01:35:59,640 --> 01:36:03,042
Well, Miss Madea, I'm sorry
we pranked you and...

2373
01:36:03,120 --> 01:36:04,485
You get my point for the prank?

2374
01:36:04,560 --> 01:36:06,562
Trust me, your prank,
we get it now. We get it.

2375
01:36:06,640 --> 01:36:08,768
Good. Okay, good.
Thank you so much.

2376
01:36:08,840 --> 01:36:11,730
So, how do you know
all those guys in there?

2377
01:36:11,800 --> 01:36:13,880
All the people came from
my neighborhood. All of 'em.

2378
01:36:13,920 --> 01:36:16,127
That's all my people from my hood.

2379
01:36:16,200 --> 01:36:19,170
How did you get
all these fake officers?

2380
01:36:19,240 --> 01:36:20,816
Hell, Brian know
a whole bunch of people.

2381
01:36:20,840 --> 01:36:22,056
That's how I got a fake officer.

2382
01:36:22,080 --> 01:36:23,856
You know I don't mess
around with no real officer.

2383
01:36:23,880 --> 01:36:26,247
Oh, no, Madea.
Those aren't fake officers.

2384
01:36:26,320 --> 01:36:27,401
They're not fake officers.

2385
01:36:27,480 --> 01:36:29,016
Those are real officers.
Who do you think I am?

2386
01:36:29,040 --> 01:36:30,963
Federal prosecutor.
I brought the real officers.

2387
01:36:31,880 --> 01:36:34,929
- Say what?
- Those aren't fake officers.

2388
01:36:36,800 --> 01:36:40,009
- These the real police?
- Yeah.

2389
01:36:40,080 --> 01:36:44,449
- Real po-po? One time?
- Yeah.

2390
01:36:45,960 --> 01:36:47,883
Okay, I can handle this.

2391
01:36:48,480 --> 01:36:50,323
Oh, shit.

2392
01:36:50,400 --> 01:36:53,722
Wait, so all the officers
in our house right now are real?

2393
01:36:53,800 --> 01:36:57,521
Now there's nothing in there you
have to be afraid of, is there, son?

2394
01:36:58,680 --> 01:37:00,682
We found marijuana in the house.

2395
01:37:00,760 --> 01:37:03,809
You ain't got no prescription.
You ain't got no prescription.

2396
01:37:04,880 --> 01:37:06,086
Hey, don't I know you?

2397
01:37:09,960 --> 01:37:12,804
- Let's ride.
- [shrieking]

2398
01:37:12,880 --> 01:37:14,176
I know I know you from somewhere!

2399
01:37:14,200 --> 01:37:15,361
[Barn] Madea!

2400
01:37:17,960 --> 01:37:19,962
- Madea!
- Hey, where you going?

2401
01:37:20,040 --> 01:37:21,963
[Madea]
He ain't gon' never catch me...

2402
01:37:24,200 --> 01:37:26,456
That's the way to get rid of them.
Come on, let's go home.

2403
01:37:26,480 --> 01:37:28,244
- [Barn] Madea! Madea!
- I'm sorry.

2404
01:37:28,360 --> 01:37:30,010
You are learning.

2405
01:37:30,080 --> 01:37:31,809
[Barn]
Madea, come back and get me!

2406
01:38:55,040 --> 01:38:57,456
I remember I was sitting there
trying to teach you how to read.

2407
01:38:57,480 --> 01:38:59,960
And I told you to use the
word "bishop" in a sentence.

2408
01:39:00,040 --> 01:39:02,247
And you said,
"The bishop was at the church."

2409
01:39:02,320 --> 01:39:03,976
I said
"Boy, that ain't what that word means."

2410
01:39:04,000 --> 01:39:05,136
Then you got mad at me
because I was telling you

2411
01:39:05,160 --> 01:39:06,525
what the word really means.

2412
01:39:06,600 --> 01:39:08,329
Then you say
"Daddy, use it in a sentence."

2413
01:39:08,400 --> 01:39:11,370
So I use it in a sentence for you.
This is what I say.

2414
01:39:11,440 --> 01:39:13,169
"Bishop", this is what it means.

2415
01:39:13,240 --> 01:39:15,208
"Your mama came in the house
drunk, falling down

2416
01:39:15,280 --> 01:39:16,930
and I had to pick the bishop."

2417
01:39:18,080 --> 01:39:20,447
Whoop that ass.

2418
01:39:22,040 --> 01:39:23,041
[laughing]

2419
01:39:26,200 --> 01:39:28,168
- We going. Hold on here.
- [Bam] Mabel!

2420
01:39:29,600 --> 01:39:31,090
- [Barn groans]
- That's all right.

2421
01:39:31,160 --> 01:39:32,816
This son of a bitch gonna
start one of these days.

2422
01:39:32,840 --> 01:39:34,126
- Madea!
- [engine turns on]

2423
01:39:36,080 --> 01:39:37,525
Got any oil in there?

2424
01:39:37,600 --> 01:39:40,001
That's all right.
I got everything in here.

2425
01:39:40,080 --> 01:39:43,971
Don't look like you got
no gas because we still ain't left.

2426
01:39:44,240 --> 01:39:45,480
[chuckling]

2427
01:39:46,160 --> 01:39:47,810
Yo, man, wait.

2428
01:39:47,880 --> 01:39:50,167
Remember that time.
Y'all got to stop laughing.

2429
01:39:50,240 --> 01:39:52,641
You all over my lines.
Stop jumping my lines.

2430
01:39:58,120 --> 01:40:00,480
Who the hell is that
up there walking for real? Now hold on.

2431
01:40:00,520 --> 01:40:02,045
- Hold the hell on.
- [people laughing]

2432
01:40:02,120 --> 01:40:04,043
Hold the hell on. Who's upstairs?

2433
01:40:04,120 --> 01:40:05,963
I told Kanye I could've rapped with him,

2434
01:40:06,040 --> 01:40:07,456
he wouldn't let me
go on the road with him.

2435
01:40:07,480 --> 01:40:10,324
[laughing]

2436
01:40:10,440 --> 01:40:12,408
- You see, I'm on the canes now.
- Yes, I see it.

2437
01:40:12,480 --> 01:40:14,369
Yeah.
[laughing]

2438
01:40:17,120 --> 01:40:19,202
Hell, I'm killing the cameraman.

2439
01:40:19,280 --> 01:40:21,965
All of them got carbon
monoxide poisoning by now.

2440
01:40:22,040 --> 01:40:23,371
Here we go.

2441
01:40:23,440 --> 01:40:25,363
You got to go home.
After I'm done.

2442
01:40:25,440 --> 01:40:27,016
I ain't doing all that
cuddling and holding,

2443
01:40:27,040 --> 01:40:29,088
acting like I like you.
I ain't finna do that.

2444
01:40:29,160 --> 01:40:31,527
I wanna be in my bed by myself.

2445
01:40:31,600 --> 01:40:33,364
Thank you. I'll see you later.

2446
01:40:33,440 --> 01:40:35,681
Your 20 dollars is on the dresser.

2447
01:40:37,160 --> 01:40:38,571
Look at...
[chuckles]

2448
01:40:38,640 --> 01:40:40,120
I ain't gonna tell her what happened.

2449
01:40:41,960 --> 01:40:43,644
[laughing]

2450
01:40:48,440 --> 01:40:50,761
Do you know what a ho is?
No, you don't. Be glad.

2451
01:40:50,840 --> 01:40:53,923
Well, you do. Well, your mama.
Your mama was a ho.

2452
01:40:54,000 --> 01:40:55,520
But that's all right.
That's all right.

2453
01:40:55,560 --> 01:40:58,086
God gotta make room for everybody.

2454
01:40:58,160 --> 01:41:01,403
Yeah, when she died I had to bury her
on her belly to give her ass a break.

2455
01:41:01,480 --> 01:41:04,484
'Cause she was just worn out.

2456
01:41:04,560 --> 01:41:06,210
But last year I was actually a ghost.

2457
01:41:06,280 --> 01:41:08,203
Wait, you just said
you don't celebrate ghosts.

2458
01:41:08,280 --> 01:41:09,611
Oh, no, the Holy Ghost.

2459
01:41:11,200 --> 01:41:12,964
[all laugh]

2460
01:41:13,040 --> 01:41:15,441
Can somebody just be on a script?

2461
01:41:15,520 --> 01:41:18,126
See, we've said some things twice.

2462
01:41:18,200 --> 01:41:21,204
Yeah, I've been telling them
that she went down there to the doctor.

2463
01:41:21,280 --> 01:41:24,489
And the doctor told her
that she can't have sex for a while.

2464
01:41:24,560 --> 01:41:26,130
That's what the doctor told her.

2465
01:41:26,200 --> 01:41:29,568
I said, well,
"What did the dentist say?"

2466
01:41:29,640 --> 01:41:32,610
[chuckling] Oh, shit.
It's too late for this shit.

2467
01:41:35,400 --> 01:41:36,765
[continues laughing]