1 00:00:55,806 --> 00:00:58,224 I watched Signs again last night. 2 00:00:58,726 --> 00:01:01,394 It keeps getting better every time I see it. 3 00:01:02,730 --> 00:01:04,105 It's funny. 4 00:01:04,481 --> 00:01:08,735 The first time you watch it, it's hard to understand what it's about. 5 00:01:08,986 --> 00:01:10,987 It just sort of meanders. 6 00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:17,076 And then, everything comes together in this one perfect moment at the end. 7 00:01:17,995 --> 00:01:21,497 And when you watch it a second or a third or a fourth time, 8 00:01:21,665 --> 00:01:26,085 you start to see that all of this randomness 9 00:01:27,171 --> 00:01:29,881 is leading towards a perfect moment. 10 00:01:31,842 --> 00:01:35,178 My favorite character is the little girl. 11 00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:39,015 Everyone thinks she's so strange 12 00:01:39,850 --> 00:01:42,685 because she can't finish a glass of water. 13 00:01:43,187 --> 00:01:45,813 She's convinced they're contaminated. 14 00:01:47,524 --> 00:01:49,650 So, by the end of the film, 15 00:01:49,860 --> 00:01:53,321 there are glasses of water littered around this house. 16 00:01:56,366 --> 00:01:59,202 And then, it's the water that saves them. 17 00:02:01,705 --> 00:02:03,456 And that was fate. 18 00:02:09,713 --> 00:02:12,882 I can't help but wonder about my fate. 19 00:02:14,384 --> 00:02:16,052 About my destiny. 20 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:20,176 Renewal. 21 00:04:21,428 --> 00:04:23,179 Vitality. 22 00:04:24,514 --> 00:04:25,890 Energy. 23 00:04:28,518 --> 00:04:31,145 Are you tired of feeling sluggish? 24 00:04:31,396 --> 00:04:34,148 Do you feel like life is passing you by? 25 00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:37,610 Then we've got the solution for you. 26 00:04:37,861 --> 00:04:41,697 It's called "The Most Incredible Vitamin In The World" 27 00:04:42,032 --> 00:04:45,368 and there's a reason you're watching this right now. 28 00:04:46,703 --> 00:04:50,957 Just pick up the phone and start the new chapter to your life. 29 00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:56,420 Call now. Not available in stores. 30 00:04:56,505 --> 00:04:59,465 Made in Germany. Beware of imitators. Call 1-800... 31 00:05:02,344 --> 00:05:04,428 Hello? 32 00:05:04,513 --> 00:05:05,846 Yo, Kevin. 33 00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:08,182 No, this is Jeff. 34 00:05:08,266 --> 00:05:09,809 Where Kevin at? 35 00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:11,185 I don't know. 36 00:05:11,269 --> 00:05:12,687 Oh, man, look, don't be fucking around! 37 00:05:12,771 --> 00:05:13,896 Where the fuck is Kevin? 38 00:05:15,107 --> 00:05:16,399 Kevin doesn't live here. 39 00:05:16,483 --> 00:05:20,111 There's always some motherfucker trying to tell me there ain't no Kevin! 40 00:05:20,195 --> 00:05:24,365 Let me put this word in your fucking peanut brain, Kevin! K-E-V-I-N! 41 00:05:40,007 --> 00:05:41,340 Kevin. 42 00:05:48,390 --> 00:05:50,307 What are you doing? 43 00:05:50,392 --> 00:05:51,600 Doing this. 44 00:05:52,269 --> 00:05:53,936 Some strawbs, 45 00:05:54,021 --> 00:05:55,187 hand-sliced. 46 00:05:58,525 --> 00:06:01,360 A white rose of whipped cream. Bam! 47 00:06:06,241 --> 00:06:07,283 Bon appétit. 48 00:06:07,909 --> 00:06:09,827 What's the special occasion? 49 00:06:09,911 --> 00:06:13,497 This is one of those "just because" breakfasts, you know? 50 00:06:13,582 --> 00:06:15,916 It sounds corny, but relationships are like flowers 51 00:06:16,001 --> 00:06:19,003 and flowers need water to bloom. 52 00:06:19,087 --> 00:06:24,050 Consider this sprinkling from a watering can. 53 00:06:24,968 --> 00:06:26,469 Well, thanks. 54 00:06:26,970 --> 00:06:28,971 - That's nice. - You're welcome. Enjoy. 55 00:06:31,349 --> 00:06:35,019 Oh, my gosh. I got some good news, actually. 56 00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:36,270 Yeah? 57 00:06:36,354 --> 00:06:38,397 I got a phone call from Randy. 58 00:06:38,482 --> 00:06:41,150 Is he the guy that we talked to at that barbecue? 59 00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:43,694 Oh, no, that's a different Randy. 60 00:06:43,820 --> 00:06:46,072 - But that guy's name was Randy, right? - Yes. 61 00:06:46,156 --> 00:06:47,323 I liked his wife. 62 00:06:47,616 --> 00:06:48,908 Different Randy. 63 00:06:48,992 --> 00:06:50,826 - We should have them over. - Yeah. 64 00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:53,662 This is Randy at Millennium Porsche. 65 00:06:55,248 --> 00:06:56,332 Can I tell you something? 66 00:06:56,416 --> 00:07:00,127 With no money down, this thing is practically free. 67 00:07:00,212 --> 00:07:01,378 Pat! No! 68 00:07:01,463 --> 00:07:03,798 Whoa, whoa. Don't start with no. 69 00:07:03,882 --> 00:07:06,634 - That's what this is. - Don't start with no. 70 00:07:06,718 --> 00:07:08,719 You're just, like, in this mindset. And you're not even... 71 00:07:08,804 --> 00:07:10,930 It's not a mindset. We don't have the money. 72 00:07:11,014 --> 00:07:13,516 Yeah. That's the mindset I'm talking about. 73 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:16,018 Honey, look, I'm trying to be really careful, 74 00:07:16,103 --> 00:07:18,270 and I've cut back on some things. 75 00:07:18,355 --> 00:07:20,606 And, like, we promised we were going to get a house this year... 76 00:07:20,690 --> 00:07:22,316 I'm just trying to be a grown-up about this. 77 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:24,360 Surprise. 78 00:07:28,490 --> 00:07:29,824 We got it. 79 00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:33,869 This is happening. 80 00:07:35,622 --> 00:07:40,167 Look... Everything you just said about the house, 81 00:07:40,252 --> 00:07:42,586 you know, our future, 82 00:07:43,338 --> 00:07:44,839 you're exactly right. 83 00:07:45,590 --> 00:07:48,217 And I'm so lucky to have you 84 00:07:48,844 --> 00:07:51,178 looking out for us in that way. 85 00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:54,807 But I'm looking out for us in another way. 86 00:07:54,891 --> 00:07:56,767 I'm looking out for... 87 00:07:58,228 --> 00:08:01,856 That intangible thing that every couple needs. 88 00:08:01,940 --> 00:08:05,401 It's a little bit of magic, and a little bit of danger, frankly. 89 00:08:06,027 --> 00:08:08,362 This is gonna solve a lot of our problems. 90 00:08:08,446 --> 00:08:11,532 This tension right now. As soon as you get in that thing 91 00:08:11,616 --> 00:08:14,285 and you feel the energy 92 00:08:14,369 --> 00:08:16,203 and you feel it rumble 93 00:08:17,038 --> 00:08:18,664 in your gut. 94 00:08:19,749 --> 00:08:23,919 If you don't get turned on, you're made of stone. 95 00:08:25,672 --> 00:08:27,006 Where is it? 96 00:08:28,425 --> 00:08:29,925 It's in the driveway. 97 00:08:34,723 --> 00:08:36,765 Are you... Is this... 98 00:08:36,850 --> 00:08:38,267 Oh, come on. Okay, okay... That's... 99 00:09:35,492 --> 00:09:36,492 Hello? 100 00:09:36,826 --> 00:09:37,952 - Mom? - Jeff. 101 00:09:38,036 --> 00:09:39,203 Hi. 102 00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:41,497 You know, you're supposed to say "hello" when you pick up the phone. 103 00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:42,915 Yeah, I know. 104 00:09:42,999 --> 00:09:45,251 I thought that maybe you were somebody else, but you're not. 105 00:09:45,335 --> 00:09:48,045 What do you do in the basement? You're not cleaning it. 106 00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:49,088 You really want to know? 107 00:09:49,172 --> 00:09:50,256 You didn't like it last time we had this conversation. 108 00:09:50,340 --> 00:09:51,715 Okay, no. You know what? You're right. I don't. 109 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:52,925 Did you get the wood glue? 110 00:09:53,009 --> 00:09:54,551 What are you talking about? 111 00:09:54,636 --> 00:09:56,512 I left you a note on the kitchen counter. 112 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:58,472 I haven't been upstairs. 113 00:09:58,556 --> 00:10:01,433 One of the shutters on the pantry is broken and I need you to fix it. 114 00:10:01,518 --> 00:10:03,477 You know what, I'm kind of busy right now, so... 115 00:10:03,561 --> 00:10:06,438 All I want for my birthday is for you to get your ass off that couch, 116 00:10:06,523 --> 00:10:07,773 and you get on the bus 117 00:10:07,857 --> 00:10:09,692 - and you go to the Home Depot. - I'm not on the couch. 118 00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:13,362 You come home and fix the shutter before I get home, 119 00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:15,114 or you're gonna find someplace else to live. 120 00:10:15,198 --> 00:10:16,365 - Fine. - Fine. 121 00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:17,908 Good. You got it? Do you understand? 122 00:10:17,993 --> 00:10:20,369 Yes, Mom! Okay! 123 00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:22,121 Love you! Goodbye. 124 00:10:23,498 --> 00:10:25,040 Did you hang up on me? 125 00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:08,917 - Oh, thank you. - You're welcome. 126 00:12:11,648 --> 00:12:14,691 Stop the bus. Can you please stop the bus? 127 00:12:14,776 --> 00:12:16,819 Sorry. Thank you. 128 00:13:11,541 --> 00:13:12,541 Can I help you? 129 00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:17,087 Can I help you, sir? 130 00:13:17,172 --> 00:13:18,172 No. 131 00:13:18,256 --> 00:13:19,423 What? 132 00:13:36,399 --> 00:13:37,983 Pass the ball! 133 00:13:52,165 --> 00:13:53,207 Go, go, go! 134 00:13:59,797 --> 00:14:01,465 Shit, you a'ight? 135 00:14:02,300 --> 00:14:03,967 Get your big ass up, man. 136 00:14:04,302 --> 00:14:05,886 You bleeding and shit? 137 00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:08,347 - He out, man. - We need another person. 138 00:14:08,431 --> 00:14:09,765 We need one! 139 00:14:11,226 --> 00:14:12,226 You got next. 140 00:14:12,769 --> 00:14:14,144 Who, him? 141 00:14:14,229 --> 00:14:15,312 He gonna be a ref? 142 00:14:15,396 --> 00:14:17,981 That's all we got. That's all we got. 143 00:14:18,066 --> 00:14:19,900 Let's see what he got. 144 00:14:19,984 --> 00:14:22,319 Let's go, dawg. Get out here. 145 00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:39,044 Oh, he's passing now. 146 00:14:39,128 --> 00:14:40,629 Right there, dawg. What's your problem? 147 00:14:40,713 --> 00:14:42,548 That's your man. 148 00:14:48,179 --> 00:14:50,347 Why don't you play some D, man? 149 00:14:51,641 --> 00:14:53,308 Right, right, right. 150 00:14:57,355 --> 00:14:58,355 Hell, no! 151 00:15:01,734 --> 00:15:03,819 You working on this? Come on, man. 152 00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,493 Go, go, go, go. 153 00:15:25,758 --> 00:15:26,800 I'm Jeff. 154 00:15:27,677 --> 00:15:28,802 Kevin. 155 00:15:28,886 --> 00:15:29,928 Ke... 156 00:15:30,013 --> 00:15:31,138 Kevin. 157 00:15:31,222 --> 00:15:32,389 Is your name Kevin Kevin? 158 00:15:33,683 --> 00:15:34,850 No. 159 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,226 So, that's your first name on your jersey? 160 00:15:36,978 --> 00:15:38,854 Yeah, that's my name. 161 00:15:38,938 --> 00:15:40,188 Yeah. 162 00:15:40,273 --> 00:15:41,940 Do you live around here? 163 00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:44,943 Yeah, I don't live far from here. 164 00:15:45,028 --> 00:15:47,112 You obviously don't live around here, though. 165 00:15:47,196 --> 00:15:49,323 No, I was just strolling around today. 166 00:15:49,407 --> 00:15:51,658 It was a nice day, so I thought I'd walk around. 167 00:15:51,743 --> 00:15:53,744 Were you following me, or... 168 00:15:53,828 --> 00:15:55,120 No. I mean, no. 169 00:15:55,204 --> 00:15:56,580 I saw you on the bus. 170 00:15:56,664 --> 00:15:58,832 Let me explain. 171 00:15:59,667 --> 00:16:01,835 Have you ever seen the movie Signs? 172 00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:05,797 With Mel Gibson and Rory Culkin, and Abigail Breslin? 173 00:16:05,882 --> 00:16:07,633 Nah, I don't think I have. 174 00:16:09,344 --> 00:16:11,720 I got a phone call this morning. 175 00:16:12,096 --> 00:16:13,639 Someone was asking for Kevin. 176 00:16:13,723 --> 00:16:16,141 But there's no Kevin who lives with me. 177 00:16:16,225 --> 00:16:18,268 It's kind of a common name. 178 00:16:18,353 --> 00:16:21,146 Yeah. I guess that's true. 179 00:16:21,230 --> 00:16:22,689 I mean, you never got a call, 180 00:16:22,774 --> 00:16:24,775 like someone called the wrong house phone? 181 00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:26,568 What if there's no wrong numbers? 182 00:16:26,653 --> 00:16:29,237 Maybe it's always the right house phone. 183 00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:32,282 Everything happens for a reason, right? 184 00:16:35,578 --> 00:16:37,537 Exactly. No, that's exactly it. 185 00:16:37,622 --> 00:16:40,374 Hey, man, I'm about to go put something in the air real quick. 186 00:16:40,458 --> 00:16:42,876 I don't know if you want to come. 187 00:16:43,586 --> 00:16:45,879 I don't... I'm sorry... I don't know what that means. 188 00:16:45,963 --> 00:16:47,381 Smoke weed? 189 00:16:49,759 --> 00:16:51,093 You want to smoke weed with me? 190 00:16:51,177 --> 00:16:53,178 Yeah, man. 191 00:16:53,262 --> 00:16:54,680 I like weed. 192 00:16:54,764 --> 00:16:56,431 Yeah, I can see that. 193 00:17:09,320 --> 00:17:10,445 Wow. 194 00:17:12,824 --> 00:17:14,324 It's nice in here. 195 00:17:28,506 --> 00:17:30,090 - That's nice. - Yeah. 196 00:17:30,633 --> 00:17:33,301 Oh, shit. That's a treat. 197 00:17:36,139 --> 00:17:37,472 Check his pockets! 198 00:17:47,442 --> 00:17:48,984 Sorry, Jeff. 199 00:17:54,866 --> 00:17:56,700 Marriage is a compromise. 200 00:17:58,327 --> 00:18:01,204 She got what she wanted, I'm living here in Baton Rouge. 201 00:18:01,706 --> 00:18:03,081 So I get a little somethin'-somethin'. 202 00:18:03,166 --> 00:18:05,000 - Right? - Sure. 203 00:18:05,710 --> 00:18:06,835 Yeah. 204 00:18:07,503 --> 00:18:10,505 Thank you. You know what's up. 205 00:18:12,216 --> 00:18:14,009 I got to take this... It's a business call. 206 00:18:14,218 --> 00:18:16,470 Sweetheart, can I get another Bud Light. Do you want more wings? 207 00:18:19,724 --> 00:18:20,766 Whatever. 208 00:18:22,351 --> 00:18:26,646 Fine. I will get glue and fix your shutter. 209 00:18:26,731 --> 00:18:29,274 No. It is Jeff's responsibility. That is the point. 210 00:18:29,358 --> 00:18:32,152 He has to do it, not you. Jeff has to do it. 211 00:18:32,236 --> 00:18:34,362 Okay. What are you... Why are you calling me? 212 00:18:34,781 --> 00:18:38,867 Maybe you could get him moving a little bit. Do you understand? 213 00:18:38,951 --> 00:18:40,786 He's stuck, honey. He's stuck. 214 00:18:40,870 --> 00:18:42,204 He's 30! 215 00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:45,123 He had a difficult adolescent period. 216 00:18:45,208 --> 00:18:49,211 You of all people would know neither of us had a very easy adolescent period. 217 00:18:49,545 --> 00:18:52,214 - You were older. - What does that have to do with it? 218 00:18:52,298 --> 00:18:56,301 When you're an adult, you take responsibility for your life. Okay? 219 00:18:56,385 --> 00:18:58,595 But you're brothers. You love each other, don't you? 220 00:18:58,679 --> 00:19:02,390 You know, fake it for a little bit just to get... You know. 221 00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:03,725 Maybe he'll grow on you. 222 00:19:04,477 --> 00:19:06,978 We don't do that, Mom. We don't 223 00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:10,065 spend time together. 224 00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:13,652 Well, Pat, could you at least try? It's my birthday. 225 00:19:16,989 --> 00:19:18,490 I gotta call you back. 226 00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:20,408 - No, no, no, Pat... - Bye. 227 00:19:20,493 --> 00:19:22,327 Damn it. Asshole. 228 00:19:51,607 --> 00:19:53,108 Jeff! 229 00:19:54,777 --> 00:19:55,944 Pat? 230 00:19:58,447 --> 00:19:59,698 What the hell are you doing here? 231 00:19:59,782 --> 00:20:02,701 Kevin beat me up. I walked. 232 00:20:02,785 --> 00:20:03,785 Who's Kevin? 233 00:20:05,288 --> 00:20:07,247 Some kid I was following. 234 00:20:07,331 --> 00:20:09,499 Well, if he's a kid, how come you didn't kick his ass? 235 00:20:11,294 --> 00:20:13,253 Because I don't believe in fighting, Pat. And you know that. 236 00:20:13,337 --> 00:20:14,838 Right. I forgot. You're a pussy. 237 00:20:14,922 --> 00:20:16,214 Look, Mom called and she's really pissed. 238 00:20:16,299 --> 00:20:17,507 Was Gandhi a pussy? 239 00:20:17,592 --> 00:20:18,717 Yeah, Gandhi was a pussy. 240 00:20:18,801 --> 00:20:21,845 And once again, I have to pick up your slack. 241 00:20:21,929 --> 00:20:23,221 Well, it's not your problem. 242 00:20:23,306 --> 00:20:24,306 Well, it becomes my problem 243 00:20:24,390 --> 00:20:26,516 when Mom calls me in the middle of a business meeting. 244 00:20:26,601 --> 00:20:28,560 Yeah? You're having a business meeting at Hooters? 245 00:20:28,644 --> 00:20:29,769 Yeah. Yes. 246 00:20:29,854 --> 00:20:30,979 That's very classy. 247 00:20:31,105 --> 00:20:33,857 Right. Well, business is business. 248 00:20:34,358 --> 00:20:35,525 So, come on. Get in the car. 249 00:20:36,485 --> 00:20:38,236 Hey! You don't need to grab onto me. 250 00:20:38,321 --> 00:20:40,196 I'm a little bit conflicted right now, that's all. 251 00:20:40,281 --> 00:20:41,406 About what? 252 00:20:41,490 --> 00:20:43,074 You're just gonna make fun of me, man. 253 00:20:43,159 --> 00:20:44,242 Let's go. Try me. 254 00:20:44,327 --> 00:20:46,369 I want to learn how you think because I want to free my mind. 255 00:20:46,454 --> 00:20:49,247 Let me try to explain it to you maybe in terms that you would understand. 256 00:20:49,332 --> 00:20:50,373 - Okay. - This morning 257 00:20:50,458 --> 00:20:55,086 I was meant to have a business meeting with the Kevins. 258 00:20:55,171 --> 00:20:57,797 And destiny. And now you're here 259 00:20:57,882 --> 00:21:00,133 at this weird Hooters thing... 260 00:21:00,217 --> 00:21:03,637 And so now I'm just trying to figure out how to proceed. 261 00:21:03,721 --> 00:21:06,598 What you just said sounded like Yoda took acid 262 00:21:06,682 --> 00:21:08,767 and stumbled into a business meeting. 263 00:21:08,851 --> 00:21:11,144 You can make all the fun of Yoda that you want, 264 00:21:11,228 --> 00:21:13,271 Yoda would be fucking killer in a business meeting. 265 00:21:13,356 --> 00:21:16,274 Whatever, man. Come on! Let's go. Get in the Porsche. 266 00:21:16,359 --> 00:21:17,359 Shit! 267 00:21:18,694 --> 00:21:21,613 Hey, I think your Porsche got a ticket, Pat. 268 00:21:22,323 --> 00:21:24,616 Shut up, Jeff. Just get in the car. 269 00:21:29,163 --> 00:21:30,455 This Porsche is tiny. 270 00:21:30,539 --> 00:21:33,041 The Porsche is normal-sized. You're a sasquatch. 271 00:21:35,002 --> 00:21:36,670 Are those workout gloves? 272 00:21:36,754 --> 00:21:38,838 I don't think so. They came with the car so... 273 00:21:40,549 --> 00:21:42,842 Check this out. You see where those cars are stopping up ahead? 274 00:21:42,927 --> 00:21:43,969 Yeah. 275 00:21:44,053 --> 00:21:45,220 I should probably stop pretty soon, right? 276 00:21:45,513 --> 00:21:46,638 Pat, slow down. 277 00:21:46,722 --> 00:21:48,890 What? I can't hear you! Bose surround sound! 278 00:21:48,975 --> 00:21:50,809 Hey, stop it, dude. This is not funny. 279 00:21:50,893 --> 00:21:52,978 - Count to three and I'll stop. - Pat, please stop. 280 00:21:53,062 --> 00:21:56,147 Count of three! One! Two! 281 00:21:56,232 --> 00:21:57,399 - Pat, look out! - Three! 282 00:21:58,734 --> 00:21:59,901 Curb! Curb! 283 00:21:59,986 --> 00:22:00,986 Shit! Yes! 284 00:22:01,404 --> 00:22:02,487 Will you please stop the car? 285 00:22:02,822 --> 00:22:04,656 It handles better at high speeds! 286 00:22:04,740 --> 00:22:06,157 - Stop the car! - Shut up! 287 00:22:08,119 --> 00:22:09,119 Tree! Tree! 288 00:22:19,922 --> 00:22:20,922 Pat? 289 00:22:21,257 --> 00:22:22,424 Fuck! 290 00:22:22,508 --> 00:22:24,801 Wow. Yeah, that's real bad. 291 00:22:25,803 --> 00:22:27,053 Oh, shit. 292 00:22:27,138 --> 00:22:28,805 What the fuck? 293 00:22:29,390 --> 00:22:30,473 He looks mad. 294 00:22:30,558 --> 00:22:31,725 Are you on drugs? 295 00:22:31,809 --> 00:22:33,309 How many beers have you had? 296 00:22:33,436 --> 00:22:35,603 Shut up, Jeff. Shut up. 297 00:22:35,688 --> 00:22:37,814 Did you not see that damn tree? 298 00:22:37,898 --> 00:22:41,109 Whatever you do, don't say a word. Stay in the fucking car. 299 00:22:41,193 --> 00:22:43,778 I am fine, yes. Thank you for asking. 300 00:22:43,863 --> 00:22:46,114 Burt, should we call an ambulance? 301 00:22:46,198 --> 00:22:48,616 Hi. There was a pedestrian child 302 00:22:48,701 --> 00:22:52,037 in the street and in order to avoid killing it, 303 00:22:52,121 --> 00:22:55,081 I had to swerve and maneuver onto your sidewalk, 304 00:22:55,166 --> 00:22:57,876 at which point I lost control of my vehicle 305 00:22:57,960 --> 00:22:59,461 and I've hit your tree here. 306 00:22:59,545 --> 00:23:01,254 We can see that. Do you think we're blind? 307 00:23:01,380 --> 00:23:04,382 No. Of course not. I just would like to apologize. 308 00:23:04,467 --> 00:23:05,717 Is he okay? 309 00:23:05,801 --> 00:23:07,260 Yeah, he's fine. Just a little stunned. 310 00:23:07,344 --> 00:23:10,472 I think that one's hurt. Maybe we should call the police. 311 00:23:10,556 --> 00:23:12,015 He's fine. He's okay. 312 00:23:12,099 --> 00:23:13,475 That child’s not moving. 313 00:23:13,559 --> 00:23:17,896 Ma'am, he's okay. Jeff, will you get out of the car? 314 00:23:17,980 --> 00:23:19,647 Yeah. Get out of the car. 315 00:23:20,441 --> 00:23:21,649 Show her that you're fine. 316 00:23:22,109 --> 00:23:24,277 See? Live and limber. 317 00:23:24,361 --> 00:23:26,362 - Baby, are you sure you're all right? - Look at that. 318 00:23:26,447 --> 00:23:28,031 - I am fine, thank you. - Look at that. Good as new. 319 00:23:28,115 --> 00:23:30,116 You remind me of my grandson. 320 00:23:31,035 --> 00:23:32,827 Is his name Kevin, by any chance? 321 00:23:33,204 --> 00:23:34,537 Brian, why? 322 00:23:35,206 --> 00:23:36,498 No reason, ma'am. 323 00:23:36,582 --> 00:23:39,876 Do you think there's any way that you and I can take care of this ourselves? 324 00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:42,545 I really don't want to hang out here all afternoon with the cops. 325 00:23:42,630 --> 00:23:44,964 I don't know... There's some bark off that tree. 326 00:23:45,049 --> 00:23:46,716 It might have ruined the tree, baby. 327 00:23:46,801 --> 00:23:48,468 Whoa. Is that Linda? 328 00:23:48,719 --> 00:23:50,845 Give me 500 bucks, and we'll call it even. 329 00:23:51,555 --> 00:23:52,639 Excuse me? 330 00:23:52,723 --> 00:23:54,349 No "excuse me," man. 331 00:23:54,433 --> 00:23:56,726 Look at my tree here. That's a 200-year-old tree. 332 00:23:56,811 --> 00:23:58,228 Might have to do some landscaping. 333 00:23:58,312 --> 00:23:59,604 I'll probably have to bring a tractor in here 334 00:23:59,688 --> 00:24:00,897 and a backhoe and dig all this stuff up. 335 00:24:00,981 --> 00:24:02,107 It's a tree! 336 00:24:02,650 --> 00:24:03,942 Have you been drinking? 337 00:24:05,236 --> 00:24:06,402 No. 338 00:24:06,904 --> 00:24:10,615 Why don't we just let the police decide that. Call 911. 339 00:24:10,699 --> 00:24:12,283 - $100. - Times five. 340 00:24:13,327 --> 00:24:14,994 - $150. - Plus $350. 341 00:24:15,079 --> 00:24:17,247 - Fine. Call the police. - Call 911. 342 00:24:17,331 --> 00:24:19,082 God damn it! 343 00:24:20,835 --> 00:24:22,043 You take a check? 344 00:24:22,503 --> 00:24:24,379 Yeah. No problem. 345 00:24:24,463 --> 00:24:25,755 Oh, good. 346 00:24:26,674 --> 00:24:28,466 Boy, he's got some nerve, don't he? 347 00:24:28,551 --> 00:24:30,093 Trying to negotiate with you about our tree. 348 00:24:30,177 --> 00:24:32,846 He come in my yard, hit my tree. 349 00:24:32,930 --> 00:24:34,973 You look at that tree and he don't think he owes me. 350 00:24:35,057 --> 00:24:37,142 Who's that guy she's with? 351 00:24:39,061 --> 00:24:40,895 Get in the car, Jeff. 352 00:26:10,653 --> 00:26:12,403 It was very, very quick and it could have been somebody... 353 00:26:12,488 --> 00:26:16,658 She was wearing a peach dress that she wore this morning, okay? 354 00:26:16,742 --> 00:26:18,409 And they got into our car! 355 00:26:21,664 --> 00:26:24,040 Man, something really big is happening here. 356 00:26:24,124 --> 00:26:28,670 Yeah, no shit, Jeff! My wife is having an affair! 357 00:26:28,754 --> 00:26:29,837 We don't know that yet. 358 00:26:29,922 --> 00:26:31,422 Let's follow this and see where this leads. 359 00:26:31,507 --> 00:26:34,008 Well, I'm trying to, but I can't see dick so it's kind of hard. 360 00:26:36,804 --> 00:26:39,430 Go! Go! Go, go! 361 00:26:41,392 --> 00:26:42,433 Hang on. 362 00:26:44,687 --> 00:26:46,020 - I see them! - Where? 363 00:26:46,105 --> 00:26:47,855 They're just up here to the left! 364 00:26:48,357 --> 00:26:49,774 There they are! Pat. 365 00:26:50,359 --> 00:26:52,193 What the fuck are you doing? 366 00:26:52,444 --> 00:26:53,611 You told me to hurry! 367 00:26:53,696 --> 00:26:55,947 Tell me before you swerve so I don't fall off the fucking car! 368 00:26:56,031 --> 00:27:00,201 Okay. Whatever, just focus on the road! Where are they going? 369 00:27:02,621 --> 00:27:04,455 They're turning up there! 370 00:27:04,540 --> 00:27:05,540 What street? 371 00:27:06,375 --> 00:27:08,459 South Clark! South Clark! 372 00:27:08,794 --> 00:27:11,129 They're going to Cochon! Damn it! 373 00:27:13,048 --> 00:27:14,465 Let me tell you about Cochon. 374 00:27:14,550 --> 00:27:17,176 It's full of A-holes who look down on everybody 375 00:27:17,261 --> 00:27:20,388 that's not, like, part of the cool-guy club. It's so lame. 376 00:27:20,889 --> 00:27:22,557 Look at this, no parking. 377 00:27:22,641 --> 00:27:23,933 I can wait with the car. 378 00:27:24,018 --> 00:27:25,310 No. I got it. 379 00:27:26,645 --> 00:27:28,479 Pat, there's a fire hydrant! 380 00:27:29,231 --> 00:27:30,398 There's a fire hydrant right here. 381 00:27:31,066 --> 00:27:32,317 I got it. 382 00:27:36,405 --> 00:27:38,239 I'm pretty sure that's illegal. 383 00:27:38,324 --> 00:27:39,657 Come on. Let's go. 384 00:27:44,496 --> 00:27:46,998 Okay, what we got here is a friendly lunch. 385 00:27:47,082 --> 00:27:48,499 It could be a coworker. 386 00:27:48,876 --> 00:27:50,918 It could be a long-lost cousin. 387 00:27:51,003 --> 00:27:53,421 She hates her coworkers and I know her whole family. 388 00:27:56,717 --> 00:27:58,384 We got to hear what they're saying. 389 00:27:59,053 --> 00:28:01,220 Well, body language can tell you a lot, man. 390 00:28:06,477 --> 00:28:08,186 - You're going in there. - What, me? 391 00:28:08,270 --> 00:28:09,395 Yeah. 392 00:28:09,480 --> 00:28:11,397 I'm not really dressed properly, Pat. 393 00:28:11,482 --> 00:28:14,108 Why don't you just go in there and talk to her? 394 00:28:14,234 --> 00:28:15,651 This could all be a huge misunderstanding. 395 00:28:15,736 --> 00:28:17,779 If I talk to her, she's just gonna deny it. 396 00:28:18,238 --> 00:28:20,031 Why wouldn't she tell you the truth? 397 00:28:20,115 --> 00:28:22,784 Oh, my God. You have no idea how adult relationships work, do you? 398 00:28:23,452 --> 00:28:25,536 You haven't had a girlfriend since high school. 399 00:28:25,621 --> 00:28:27,622 - So? So? - So? So... 400 00:28:27,998 --> 00:28:30,541 I need to find out exactly what's going on 401 00:28:30,626 --> 00:28:32,251 so I'll have the upper hand later. 402 00:28:33,837 --> 00:28:35,296 Do you still love Linda? 403 00:28:36,924 --> 00:28:39,175 There's an empty booth next to them. 404 00:28:39,259 --> 00:28:40,468 Okay? 405 00:28:40,552 --> 00:28:42,678 Just sneak in with my phone. 406 00:28:42,763 --> 00:28:44,305 Here's a little grease money. 407 00:28:44,390 --> 00:28:47,266 Okay. Get in there, do what you got to do. 408 00:28:59,613 --> 00:29:00,947 - Hello. - Hi. 409 00:29:02,032 --> 00:29:04,409 - How do you do? Lovely. - Fine, thank you. 410 00:29:04,493 --> 00:29:05,785 Can I help you? 411 00:29:05,869 --> 00:29:07,328 Table for one, please. 412 00:29:08,580 --> 00:29:10,748 - Right this way. - Great. Thank you. 413 00:29:10,833 --> 00:29:12,500 - Oh, miss? - Yes? 414 00:29:12,584 --> 00:29:15,253 Could I sit there? 415 00:29:16,213 --> 00:29:18,923 Those tables are saved for two patrons. 416 00:29:19,007 --> 00:29:20,174 - Right. - Right this way. 417 00:29:20,717 --> 00:29:22,927 Miss? You know what? Excuse me. 418 00:29:23,011 --> 00:29:25,555 There are going to be two patrons. There will be two patrons. 419 00:29:25,639 --> 00:29:27,056 You said table of one. 420 00:29:27,558 --> 00:29:30,435 I meant that more like in the bistro sense, 421 00:29:30,519 --> 00:29:31,936 like one plus another one? 422 00:29:32,020 --> 00:29:35,773 Well, just in case, I think this table back here would be quite lovely for you guys. 423 00:29:37,693 --> 00:29:39,068 What if I grease you? 424 00:29:39,319 --> 00:29:40,361 I'm sorry? 425 00:29:40,904 --> 00:29:43,114 I have money. 426 00:29:43,198 --> 00:29:46,993 There's two fives, some ones. There's a 20. 427 00:29:47,077 --> 00:29:50,204 If I could just sit at that table. I can't explain. 428 00:29:50,998 --> 00:29:53,082 But it's really important. 429 00:30:08,682 --> 00:30:11,225 I mean, I honestly don't even feel like he really likes me. 430 00:30:11,768 --> 00:30:14,812 Well, that's his problem. I mean... 431 00:30:15,022 --> 00:30:16,856 From where I stand, there's plenty to like. 432 00:30:16,940 --> 00:30:20,067 Thank you, Steve. You're a really good listener. 433 00:30:20,235 --> 00:30:21,360 Thank you. 434 00:30:21,445 --> 00:30:22,987 It's such a treat. 435 00:30:23,071 --> 00:30:24,363 I'm just being myself. 436 00:30:24,448 --> 00:30:26,616 Don't say anything. She might recognize your voice. 437 00:30:26,700 --> 00:30:28,576 If you can hear me, give me a thumbs-up. 438 00:30:29,703 --> 00:30:33,206 Okay, now take the talking part of the phone and hold it, 439 00:30:33,624 --> 00:30:35,625 but keep it low, don't let them see. 440 00:30:35,709 --> 00:30:37,877 I really don't think that you want to hear this. 441 00:30:37,961 --> 00:30:39,337 Jeff, just do it! Okay? 442 00:30:39,421 --> 00:30:41,797 Stop talking so I can hear what's going on. 443 00:30:43,967 --> 00:30:46,886 I can't. Honestly, I lost a lot of friends because of Pat. 444 00:30:46,970 --> 00:30:51,307 'Cause my friends just don't like him. 445 00:30:51,391 --> 00:30:53,768 I think a little bit's my fault, 446 00:30:53,852 --> 00:30:55,436 'cause I would complain a lot to them and... 447 00:30:56,730 --> 00:31:00,566 For a really long time, I've felt like he and I are... 448 00:31:00,943 --> 00:31:02,026 I don't know... 449 00:31:02,110 --> 00:31:05,154 We got, like, weirdly competitive with each other. 450 00:31:05,239 --> 00:31:07,406 We just never communicate. 451 00:31:07,491 --> 00:31:09,367 He just never listens, ever. 452 00:31:11,245 --> 00:31:12,495 Gosh. 453 00:31:13,497 --> 00:31:15,998 I shouldn't even be talking about this 454 00:31:16,083 --> 00:31:20,253 but we haven't had sex in... I mean, over two months. 455 00:31:22,339 --> 00:31:24,048 That's a long time. 456 00:31:24,132 --> 00:31:26,759 And I think, kind of, what's worse than that 457 00:31:26,843 --> 00:31:28,886 is that it's so awkward. 458 00:31:29,263 --> 00:31:30,805 Well, having sex is one thing 459 00:31:32,599 --> 00:31:34,600 but making love is something else, right? 460 00:31:36,186 --> 00:31:38,187 What does that even mean? 461 00:31:38,272 --> 00:31:39,397 Thank you, Steve. 462 00:31:39,481 --> 00:31:42,233 I'm not used to being able to talk so openly with someone 463 00:31:42,317 --> 00:31:47,029 and have them listen, and care what I'm saying and... 464 00:31:47,114 --> 00:31:48,239 Hey! 465 00:31:48,323 --> 00:31:50,283 Hey! Hey! 466 00:31:50,367 --> 00:31:51,701 Wait! 467 00:31:53,954 --> 00:31:55,288 Pat, what do you want me to do now, huh? 468 00:31:55,372 --> 00:31:57,999 Hello, my name is Rob. Can I start you out with something to drink? 469 00:31:58,542 --> 00:31:59,709 Some water. 470 00:31:59,793 --> 00:32:00,960 Excuse me? 471 00:32:01,295 --> 00:32:02,878 - I'll have water. - I'm sorry? 472 00:32:02,963 --> 00:32:04,630 I'll take some fuckin' water, Rob. 473 00:32:04,881 --> 00:32:06,173 Absolutely. 474 00:32:09,886 --> 00:32:10,886 Jeff? 475 00:32:12,681 --> 00:32:13,973 Whoa! Hey. 476 00:32:14,057 --> 00:32:15,558 - Wow! - Hi. 477 00:32:15,642 --> 00:32:16,767 What are you doing here? 478 00:32:17,394 --> 00:32:20,605 I'm just... Lunching it up, you know? 479 00:32:20,689 --> 00:32:22,607 Getting a little bistro action. 480 00:32:22,691 --> 00:32:23,816 I... 481 00:32:23,900 --> 00:32:26,694 Have you ever met my friend, Steve? 482 00:32:26,778 --> 00:32:28,904 This is my brother-in-law, Jeff. 483 00:32:28,989 --> 00:32:30,948 - This is Steve. - Hey, Jeff, nice to meet you, man. 484 00:32:31,033 --> 00:32:32,825 - My friend Steve. - Steve. 485 00:32:32,909 --> 00:32:34,785 We were just gonna leave. 486 00:32:34,870 --> 00:32:37,288 Did you still want me to drop you off at your car? 487 00:32:37,372 --> 00:32:38,581 Yep. Yeah. 488 00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:45,004 So, I'm going to take him to his car, and I'll see you later. 489 00:32:45,505 --> 00:32:47,089 Hope so. 490 00:32:47,174 --> 00:32:48,591 Nice meeting you, Jeff. 491 00:32:55,432 --> 00:32:56,766 Pat, they're coming out... 492 00:32:59,770 --> 00:33:01,354 What the fuck? 493 00:33:03,065 --> 00:33:06,150 Jeff! They went that way! 494 00:33:06,234 --> 00:33:07,568 Pat! Well, then, let's go get the car! 495 00:33:07,653 --> 00:33:08,986 - No car! - What? 496 00:33:09,071 --> 00:33:10,488 No car! Help me get a cab! 497 00:33:10,572 --> 00:33:12,114 What are you talkin' about? What happened to the car? 498 00:33:12,199 --> 00:33:14,408 Nothing! It got towed. 499 00:33:15,827 --> 00:33:17,578 - That's not funny! - I'm not... 500 00:33:17,663 --> 00:33:19,955 - I know. I know it's not. - It's so not funny! 501 00:33:20,040 --> 00:33:21,415 Help me get a cab! 502 00:33:21,500 --> 00:33:23,918 - There's no way to know where they are. - Great. 503 00:33:24,753 --> 00:33:26,337 What do we do? 504 00:33:28,090 --> 00:33:30,341 I think we should just sit down right here. 505 00:33:31,176 --> 00:33:33,344 And? And wait. 506 00:33:33,428 --> 00:33:34,679 - For what? - For a sign. 507 00:33:34,763 --> 00:33:37,014 I'm not gonna sit here and wait for a fucking sign! 508 00:33:37,099 --> 00:33:38,599 Okay, well, then let's walk! 509 00:33:38,684 --> 00:33:41,268 A school bus just drove by! It's a sign! 510 00:33:41,353 --> 00:33:42,603 What does it mean? 511 00:33:42,688 --> 00:33:44,271 Do we go to a school? 512 00:33:44,356 --> 00:33:47,274 Is my wife fucking some guy in a janitor closet? 513 00:33:47,359 --> 00:33:49,902 I don't think that's it. I don't think that's it. 514 00:33:50,362 --> 00:33:51,821 - That's not it. - Good guess. 515 00:33:53,699 --> 00:33:55,032 Now what? 516 00:33:58,537 --> 00:33:59,620 What are you doing? 517 00:33:59,705 --> 00:34:01,372 I'm looking for a credit card slip. 518 00:34:02,082 --> 00:34:03,290 I don't see why. 519 00:34:03,375 --> 00:34:05,042 If I find the slip, I get his last name 520 00:34:05,127 --> 00:34:07,420 and then we can look up where he lives and go beat him up. 521 00:34:07,504 --> 00:34:09,672 No, I get it. I just don't think they throw those things away. 522 00:34:09,756 --> 00:34:11,757 Just shut up and help. 523 00:34:11,842 --> 00:34:13,634 Find it yet? 524 00:34:14,553 --> 00:34:16,470 - How about now? - That's not helping! 525 00:34:16,555 --> 00:34:19,306 I think we've gotten off track somewhere. 526 00:34:19,808 --> 00:34:21,976 Like I've gotten off track. 527 00:34:23,478 --> 00:34:26,230 Something feels wrong. 528 00:34:26,314 --> 00:34:28,190 Fine. I'll do it myself, 529 00:34:28,275 --> 00:34:30,651 if it'll make you stop talking. 530 00:34:31,486 --> 00:34:32,862 - Is that it? - No. 531 00:34:32,946 --> 00:34:34,113 It's not. 532 00:34:34,740 --> 00:34:35,906 Oh, God. 533 00:34:35,991 --> 00:34:37,158 What is that? 534 00:34:38,744 --> 00:34:40,411 No, don't do it, Pat. 535 00:34:40,829 --> 00:34:42,246 You don't have to smell it. 536 00:34:42,330 --> 00:34:43,664 Pat. Okay. 537 00:34:46,960 --> 00:34:48,753 - Hey. - Hey, Carol. 538 00:34:51,047 --> 00:34:52,214 That was yummy. 539 00:34:54,509 --> 00:34:55,551 What're you doing? 540 00:34:59,097 --> 00:35:00,389 Don't tell anybody else. 541 00:35:00,932 --> 00:35:02,433 What? 542 00:35:02,517 --> 00:35:04,185 Somebody's messing with me. 543 00:35:04,436 --> 00:35:06,061 - Really? - Yeah, in this office. 544 00:35:06,146 --> 00:35:07,938 - No. - Yeah. I got hit by a plane. 545 00:35:08,356 --> 00:35:11,025 - What? - A little paper plane came into my... 546 00:35:12,903 --> 00:35:17,364 And all these messages were coming to me on my computer. 547 00:35:17,532 --> 00:35:18,783 Kind of... 548 00:35:19,951 --> 00:35:21,452 - Flirty stuff. - Flirty? 549 00:35:21,536 --> 00:35:22,912 I know someone's playin' some kind of a joke 550 00:35:22,996 --> 00:35:24,121 and I think it's those guys 551 00:35:24,206 --> 00:35:26,582 that are in the back over there that did the fantasy football. 552 00:35:26,666 --> 00:35:28,167 Oh, my God, those guys are so hot. 553 00:35:28,251 --> 00:35:31,295 That would be so good. They're young, too. 554 00:35:33,006 --> 00:35:34,340 Do you think it's Henry? 555 00:35:35,342 --> 00:35:36,675 - Henry? - Yeah. 556 00:35:37,844 --> 00:35:39,345 He's kind of... 557 00:35:40,222 --> 00:35:41,388 Interesting. 558 00:35:41,681 --> 00:35:43,140 He's married, isn't he? 559 00:35:43,225 --> 00:35:45,142 Okay, let's just say it is somebody here. 560 00:35:45,227 --> 00:35:48,604 What does the message say? Like what are the details? 561 00:35:48,688 --> 00:35:51,357 Well, somethin' about, you know... 562 00:35:52,317 --> 00:35:53,526 What? 563 00:35:54,361 --> 00:35:56,612 That they're a secret admirer. 564 00:35:56,696 --> 00:35:57,863 They said they were... 565 00:35:59,199 --> 00:36:00,658 I think that's kind of hot. 566 00:36:00,742 --> 00:36:02,409 No, it's not. It's ridiculous. 567 00:36:02,494 --> 00:36:04,954 And I don't like being the butt of a joke. 568 00:36:05,038 --> 00:36:06,247 How do you know it's a joke? 569 00:36:06,331 --> 00:36:09,750 I mean, how many times do we get to get juiced up like this? 570 00:36:09,835 --> 00:36:11,502 This is awesome. 571 00:36:11,586 --> 00:36:13,671 I'm not getting juiced up over a joke. 572 00:36:13,755 --> 00:36:17,633 You're getting attention. I am super-jelly. I want attention. 573 00:36:17,717 --> 00:36:19,385 You're impossible. 574 00:36:19,761 --> 00:36:21,512 When was the last time you had a relationship? 575 00:36:21,596 --> 00:36:24,682 Well, my husband, of course. 576 00:36:24,766 --> 00:36:25,933 No way. 577 00:36:26,017 --> 00:36:27,810 Well, I mean, I went out on dates. 578 00:36:27,894 --> 00:36:29,728 Come on. I've been to the movies. 579 00:36:29,813 --> 00:36:32,189 - It's no wonder you're so cranky. - I've been bowling... 580 00:36:32,274 --> 00:36:34,233 - I'm not... - Yeah, you need to get busy. 581 00:36:34,317 --> 00:36:36,068 - You need to get your pipes cleaned. - You think I'm... 582 00:36:36,152 --> 00:36:38,112 You need to get f... Yeah. 583 00:36:41,241 --> 00:36:42,575 Well, I won't tell anyone. Pinky swear. 584 00:36:47,622 --> 00:36:49,290 What else? What else? 585 00:36:50,250 --> 00:36:53,294 I did hear her say that she felt neglected. 586 00:36:55,630 --> 00:36:57,464 Sounds like they're banging already. 587 00:36:58,049 --> 00:36:59,508 It's possible. 588 00:37:00,093 --> 00:37:03,053 Don't ever get married, dude. It fucking sucks. 589 00:37:03,138 --> 00:37:06,432 Really? I think it would be kind of awesome. 590 00:37:06,516 --> 00:37:08,017 Well, it's not. 591 00:37:08,476 --> 00:37:10,060 Okay. 592 00:37:10,312 --> 00:37:12,688 I don't want to talk about this anymore. 593 00:37:12,772 --> 00:37:13,898 Okay. 594 00:37:13,982 --> 00:37:15,941 I'm sick of walking. 595 00:37:16,443 --> 00:37:17,610 Okay. 596 00:37:23,867 --> 00:37:25,993 Is that what I think it is? 597 00:37:42,052 --> 00:37:45,638 You know, I've been havin' this really weird dream about Dad lately. 598 00:37:46,473 --> 00:37:48,015 - Really? - Yeah. 599 00:37:48,683 --> 00:37:50,184 He's a teacher. 600 00:37:50,810 --> 00:37:52,019 And... 601 00:37:52,145 --> 00:37:53,854 We're in this classroom with a whole bunch of kids, 602 00:37:53,939 --> 00:37:55,481 and we all sit down. 603 00:37:55,565 --> 00:37:56,941 And Dad asks everyone, 604 00:37:57,025 --> 00:37:59,401 "What's the greatest day in the history of the world?" 605 00:38:00,320 --> 00:38:02,446 And one kid is like, "Christmas." 606 00:38:02,530 --> 00:38:04,865 And Dad's like, "No." 607 00:38:05,659 --> 00:38:07,034 And whenever they get the answer wrong, 608 00:38:07,118 --> 00:38:08,160 they have to leave the room. 609 00:38:09,496 --> 00:38:13,332 And eventually it's just me and Dad. 610 00:38:13,416 --> 00:38:16,293 And he looks at me and says, 611 00:38:16,378 --> 00:38:18,587 "Pat, what's the greatest day in the history of the world?" 612 00:38:18,672 --> 00:38:20,422 And I don't know, 'cause I'm nervous. 613 00:38:20,507 --> 00:38:22,132 And I'm like, "Dad, I don't know." 614 00:38:22,217 --> 00:38:24,176 And he just looks at me and he smiles and he says... 615 00:38:24,260 --> 00:38:27,262 He says, "Today." He says, "Today." 616 00:38:28,223 --> 00:38:29,348 How'd you know that? 617 00:38:29,432 --> 00:38:31,892 He says, "Today is the greatest day in the history of the world." 618 00:38:32,394 --> 00:38:33,936 Yeah. 619 00:38:34,562 --> 00:38:36,146 I have that dream, Pat. 620 00:38:36,231 --> 00:38:39,692 Except in mine, it's me, you and Dad in his car. 621 00:38:42,445 --> 00:38:43,988 Okay. 622 00:38:52,622 --> 00:38:55,708 I guess it's just something he said to us when we were kids or somethin'. 623 00:38:55,792 --> 00:38:58,919 It's like floating' around in both of our brains. 624 00:39:01,673 --> 00:39:02,923 What is wrong with you? 625 00:39:06,136 --> 00:39:07,636 - Pat. - What? What? 626 00:39:07,721 --> 00:39:08,679 What is wrong with you? 627 00:39:08,763 --> 00:39:10,556 Why do you want to be like this? 628 00:39:12,392 --> 00:39:14,059 - What are you talking about? - We had... We were havin'... 629 00:39:14,978 --> 00:39:16,478 We're having the same dream! 630 00:39:17,230 --> 00:39:18,564 What the fuck are you talking about? 631 00:39:18,648 --> 00:39:19,940 Why do you want to live like this? 632 00:39:20,608 --> 00:39:25,404 You're drifting through this life with no awareness of how special this is. 633 00:39:25,488 --> 00:39:28,157 You want to talk about what's happening right now, right here? 634 00:39:28,908 --> 00:39:30,242 What's happening right now 635 00:39:30,326 --> 00:39:32,661 is that I'm getting lectured by my pothead brother 636 00:39:32,746 --> 00:39:35,122 who lives in our mom's basement at 30 years old 637 00:39:35,206 --> 00:39:36,957 about how I don't understand the universe! 638 00:39:37,042 --> 00:39:39,460 Hey, here's some understanding for you. 639 00:39:39,544 --> 00:39:44,423 A job and a car and a wife and an apartment! 640 00:39:45,175 --> 00:39:46,341 I got to go. 641 00:39:46,426 --> 00:39:47,551 What? 642 00:39:47,635 --> 00:39:49,595 - I have to go, Pat. - Where are you going? 643 00:39:49,679 --> 00:39:51,972 You know what? You wouldn't... You would laugh at me again. 644 00:39:52,849 --> 00:39:54,058 Jesus Christ. 645 00:39:54,142 --> 00:39:55,642 You see a fucking truck 646 00:39:55,727 --> 00:39:57,352 with the word "Kevin" on it and you have to run after it? 647 00:39:57,437 --> 00:39:58,937 Yeah. I do. 648 00:39:59,022 --> 00:40:00,773 I wish I was that stupid! 649 00:40:01,524 --> 00:40:02,858 You're a dick! 650 00:40:03,777 --> 00:40:05,569 You know what? I have an asshole for a brother. 651 00:40:05,653 --> 00:40:06,737 It breaks my heart. 652 00:40:06,821 --> 00:40:08,530 - Fuck you! - Fuck you! 653 00:40:08,615 --> 00:40:10,699 - You call me an asshole? - Yeah, you are an asshole! 654 00:40:10,784 --> 00:40:12,743 You fucking piece of shit! 655 00:40:12,827 --> 00:40:14,161 You drive a fucking Boxster! 656 00:40:14,245 --> 00:40:15,370 Fuck you! 657 00:40:16,915 --> 00:40:17,915 Don't do this, Pat! 658 00:40:17,999 --> 00:40:19,416 Fuck you! 659 00:40:19,501 --> 00:40:21,126 You get down. Get down on the fucking ground! 660 00:40:21,211 --> 00:40:22,377 Fucking idiot! 661 00:40:28,134 --> 00:40:31,386 You and Mom will never understand me. 662 00:40:31,471 --> 00:40:33,555 And you're all I have left! 663 00:40:59,541 --> 00:41:00,666 Another Jack and Coke? 664 00:41:02,377 --> 00:41:03,627 Nope. 665 00:41:04,504 --> 00:41:06,004 Got to get home. 666 00:41:07,090 --> 00:41:08,382 Old lady, huh? 667 00:41:08,925 --> 00:41:10,509 No, she's boning another dude. 668 00:41:10,969 --> 00:41:12,219 Right on. 669 00:42:45,146 --> 00:42:48,440 Stop the car. Stop. Please, stop? 670 00:43:01,829 --> 00:43:03,413 - Hi. - Hello. 671 00:43:03,706 --> 00:43:07,960 Hey, so, my sister and her husband just got here a little while ago 672 00:43:08,044 --> 00:43:11,088 in that red Camry out there. And... 673 00:43:12,507 --> 00:43:15,509 I need to... I'm meeting them. So... 674 00:43:15,593 --> 00:43:17,010 - Okay... - Actually, 675 00:43:18,054 --> 00:43:19,263 it's an emergency. 676 00:43:19,347 --> 00:43:21,556 I have to get her medication, like, right now, 677 00:43:21,641 --> 00:43:22,683 so what's her room number? 678 00:43:23,434 --> 00:43:26,270 We have a privacy policy, sir. I'm sorry, I can't give you her number. 679 00:43:26,354 --> 00:43:29,481 I know it's like policy and everything, but this is a family emergency, 680 00:43:29,565 --> 00:43:31,024 so maybe you could just give me the room number... 681 00:43:31,109 --> 00:43:32,276 It'll take me a second to call. 682 00:43:32,360 --> 00:43:34,403 I lied. It's not an emergency. 683 00:43:35,571 --> 00:43:37,698 It's not a health emergency. 684 00:43:38,241 --> 00:43:39,992 It is a financial emergency. 685 00:43:43,204 --> 00:43:45,539 Their home is about to be foreclosed on 686 00:43:45,623 --> 00:43:49,209 and I need to make a payment. 687 00:43:59,137 --> 00:44:00,345 - Just stop. - Okay. 688 00:44:00,430 --> 00:44:02,180 - You're embarrassing yourself. - Right. 689 00:44:45,725 --> 00:44:47,309 - Thank you. - Excuse me? 690 00:44:47,393 --> 00:44:49,269 No, just thank you so much. 691 00:44:54,609 --> 00:44:55,609 Pat! Pat! 692 00:44:55,777 --> 00:44:56,777 Oh, my God. Jeff. 693 00:44:56,861 --> 00:44:58,320 - Oh, my God, Pat. - What the fuck? 694 00:44:58,404 --> 00:44:59,529 I was on the truck. 695 00:44:59,614 --> 00:45:01,656 The truck came here and now you're here. 696 00:45:01,741 --> 00:45:03,492 - This shit is aligned! - Shut the fuck up. 697 00:45:03,576 --> 00:45:06,119 - What? - Linda is here, 698 00:45:06,204 --> 00:45:07,621 in this hotel somewhere. 699 00:45:10,500 --> 00:45:13,293 - With the guy? - Yeah, probably with the guy. 700 00:45:14,295 --> 00:45:15,629 Sorry. 701 00:45:15,713 --> 00:45:17,297 How the fuck did you find me? 702 00:45:17,382 --> 00:45:18,632 It was the candy man. 703 00:45:23,971 --> 00:45:25,138 Oh, shit. 704 00:45:25,223 --> 00:45:26,640 He's right there. 705 00:45:26,724 --> 00:45:28,225 Okay, what should we do? 706 00:45:28,643 --> 00:45:29,976 Duck in there. 707 00:45:30,061 --> 00:45:31,103 I'm gigantic! 708 00:45:49,747 --> 00:45:51,998 Come on, let's go. 709 00:46:39,547 --> 00:46:40,630 What do you want to do? 710 00:46:41,466 --> 00:46:44,217 Should we stay? Should we wait? 711 00:46:45,261 --> 00:46:47,471 Do we just wait, or... 712 00:46:48,723 --> 00:46:50,056 We could wait. 713 00:46:50,141 --> 00:46:51,641 I don't know. I don't... 714 00:46:52,935 --> 00:46:54,478 Should I call her? 715 00:46:54,562 --> 00:46:57,189 Maybe I call her cell phone right now. 716 00:46:57,273 --> 00:47:00,108 And then, like, act innocent and be like, "What's going on?" 717 00:47:00,610 --> 00:47:01,735 You could try that. 718 00:47:01,903 --> 00:47:05,155 You know, you're not fucking helping at all. 719 00:47:05,239 --> 00:47:07,574 You're just like, "Do you want to do that?" 720 00:47:07,742 --> 00:47:09,409 Do you want to know what I think you should do? 721 00:47:09,494 --> 00:47:10,577 Yeah. 722 00:47:10,661 --> 00:47:11,870 I think you should take a few deep breaths, 723 00:47:11,954 --> 00:47:13,955 close your eyes, 724 00:47:14,081 --> 00:47:15,415 and focus. 725 00:47:15,917 --> 00:47:21,004 That is like stupid fucking Jeff mumbo-jumbo. 726 00:47:21,088 --> 00:47:25,550 If you have any other idea, even one, 727 00:47:25,635 --> 00:47:28,762 I'll be happy to try it without making fun of you. 728 00:47:29,889 --> 00:47:31,473 Okay, all right. 729 00:47:33,768 --> 00:47:35,268 Okay. Close your eyes. 730 00:47:39,607 --> 00:47:41,066 What do you see? 731 00:47:43,611 --> 00:47:46,530 I just can't stop picturing what's going on. 732 00:47:47,156 --> 00:47:50,242 What if she's, like, giving him a hand job? 733 00:47:50,493 --> 00:47:52,953 You know, I think they're adults. 734 00:47:53,037 --> 00:47:55,288 It's probably unlikely she's giving him a hand job. 735 00:47:57,250 --> 00:47:58,500 I'm gonna break down the door. 736 00:47:58,584 --> 00:47:59,876 No. Pat. 737 00:47:59,961 --> 00:48:01,169 I'm gonna break it down. 738 00:48:01,254 --> 00:48:03,838 Listen. Wait, hold on. That's a terrible idea. 739 00:48:03,923 --> 00:48:07,259 I've seen you try to do things physically. 740 00:48:07,385 --> 00:48:08,760 I'll do it. 741 00:48:10,179 --> 00:48:11,596 Do you think you can do that? 742 00:48:11,681 --> 00:48:13,848 I wish I could get some sort of running start. 743 00:48:13,933 --> 00:48:16,601 You totally can. There's, like, hallways. 744 00:48:16,686 --> 00:48:17,894 You run and turn. 745 00:48:17,979 --> 00:48:19,980 Parallel isn't gonna help me. 746 00:48:20,064 --> 00:48:22,232 You could run and turn right at the last second. 747 00:48:22,316 --> 00:48:24,985 I wouldn't... No. That's not gonna work. 748 00:48:25,361 --> 00:48:26,444 All right. 749 00:48:31,158 --> 00:48:32,325 One, 750 00:48:32,451 --> 00:48:33,493 two, 751 00:48:34,328 --> 00:48:35,495 three! 752 00:48:35,997 --> 00:48:37,163 Fuck! 753 00:48:37,248 --> 00:48:38,582 - Run! - What was that? 754 00:48:38,666 --> 00:48:40,292 - Are you okay? - Fuck! 755 00:48:40,376 --> 00:48:41,668 Get up! 756 00:48:41,752 --> 00:48:43,169 - Linda! - Pat! What are you... 757 00:48:43,254 --> 00:48:45,088 - Pat, don't... Pat, stop! - What's going on? 758 00:48:45,172 --> 00:48:46,673 - Steve, let him go! - Either you're gonna calm down... 759 00:48:46,757 --> 00:48:48,341 - Let him go! Jeff! - Don't fucking move! 760 00:48:48,426 --> 00:48:50,010 - What are you doing? - What the hell is going on? 761 00:48:50,094 --> 00:48:51,886 - We just got here! - Who are you people? 762 00:48:51,971 --> 00:48:54,264 You, shut up! Who the fuck is this guy? 763 00:48:54,348 --> 00:48:55,599 He's just a friend, okay? Calm down. 764 00:48:55,683 --> 00:48:57,475 - There's wine! - Yeah! 765 00:48:57,560 --> 00:49:01,104 There's a bottle of wine on ice, and a... What is this? 766 00:49:01,188 --> 00:49:02,355 - That's a... A sex board? 767 00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:03,940 No, you bring it with the... Pat! 768 00:49:04,025 --> 00:49:06,568 And your face is flushed, which means you're horny. 769 00:49:06,652 --> 00:49:08,945 - No! - What the fuck is going on? 770 00:49:09,030 --> 00:49:11,281 Stop yelling and I'll answer all of your questions. 771 00:49:11,365 --> 00:49:14,701 Excuse me! Excuse me! I'm ready to go home. 772 00:49:14,785 --> 00:49:16,161 Linda, I think you should come with me. 773 00:49:16,245 --> 00:49:18,622 Excuse me! You should shut the fuck up! 774 00:49:18,706 --> 00:49:20,874 I think that you should go and I'll call you later. 775 00:49:20,958 --> 00:49:22,167 You're not calling this fucking guy. 776 00:49:22,251 --> 00:49:23,376 Linda, do you want me to stay? 777 00:49:23,461 --> 00:49:25,879 - I think you should go. - You should go! You need to go! 778 00:49:26,005 --> 00:49:27,714 I'm gonna stay and talk to Pat, okay? 779 00:49:27,798 --> 00:49:29,758 Time for you to go, man. 780 00:49:30,176 --> 00:49:31,760 - Get out, bro! - All right, Pat. 781 00:49:31,844 --> 00:49:33,053 Get out! 782 00:49:34,388 --> 00:49:38,224 Okay. Start talking. Is there anyone else in here? 783 00:49:42,938 --> 00:49:45,231 Well, I'm a little upset, actually, 784 00:49:45,316 --> 00:49:47,150 - and I think that it's understandable! - I understand that. 785 00:49:47,234 --> 00:49:50,862 Look, what I need to know... I just need to know one thing, okay? 786 00:49:50,946 --> 00:49:52,364 - Okay. What? - Okay. 787 00:49:54,700 --> 00:49:57,744 Are you mad because you came in here and you found me with another man? 788 00:49:58,079 --> 00:49:59,162 Yes. 789 00:50:01,165 --> 00:50:02,540 - Yes. - Or... 790 00:50:03,542 --> 00:50:06,461 Or are you mad because you're afraid that you might lose me? 791 00:50:06,545 --> 00:50:08,296 What? There's like a part B now? 792 00:50:08,547 --> 00:50:09,839 Please, don't do that. 793 00:50:09,924 --> 00:50:11,257 It's just semantic bullshit! 794 00:50:11,342 --> 00:50:12,926 - No, it isn't! It isn't! - Yeah, it is! 795 00:50:13,010 --> 00:50:14,469 - You really don't know the difference. - You know what? 796 00:50:14,553 --> 00:50:15,970 Because if you don't understand the difference... 797 00:50:16,055 --> 00:50:19,307 Linda! Linda. I'm gonna try to listen to you 798 00:50:19,392 --> 00:50:21,893 blabber about whatever this is. 799 00:50:22,186 --> 00:50:25,105 And I'm gonna try to understand your incoherent babble. Go. 800 00:50:25,690 --> 00:50:27,357 - Why do you always do that? - What? 801 00:50:27,692 --> 00:50:29,567 - I'm listening. - No, you're not. 802 00:50:29,652 --> 00:50:30,985 Yeah, I'm trying. 803 00:50:31,195 --> 00:50:33,530 You always just make me feel so stupid! 804 00:50:33,781 --> 00:50:37,534 I'm sorry it's stupid! I catch you trying to cheat on me and... 805 00:50:37,785 --> 00:50:39,786 You make fun of everything I say. 806 00:50:39,870 --> 00:50:43,873 I'm really just trying to have a conversation with you right now. 807 00:50:43,999 --> 00:50:47,168 This is why our relationship is so fucked. 808 00:50:47,878 --> 00:50:50,213 Because you know what? When I asked you 809 00:50:50,297 --> 00:50:53,675 if you would take me to Cochon 810 00:50:53,801 --> 00:50:55,468 you laughed at me. 811 00:50:55,886 --> 00:50:57,679 Who care... I'm sorry. That's... 812 00:50:57,763 --> 00:51:02,016 But when I asked Steve, he just, you know, said, let's go. 813 00:51:02,143 --> 00:51:03,768 Yeah, 'cause he wanted to get in your pants! 814 00:51:03,978 --> 00:51:07,897 Well, maybe, but at least he's trying to put in some time and effort! 815 00:51:10,401 --> 00:51:12,694 Let me tell you something about Cochon. 816 00:51:12,778 --> 00:51:14,988 - Cochon is full of assholes... - You're not even... 817 00:51:15,072 --> 00:51:17,490 ...and snobs in fucking turquoise 818 00:51:17,575 --> 00:51:20,577 tailored shirts and pink ties, like that asshole! 819 00:51:20,911 --> 00:51:22,454 You want to ask me to take you there? 820 00:51:22,538 --> 00:51:25,081 Fine. I'll take you to fucking Cochon. We'll... 821 00:51:25,166 --> 00:51:27,500 - Yeah. - God, you're not even listening to me. 822 00:51:27,585 --> 00:51:29,002 No, I'm hearing you loud and clear. 823 00:51:29,086 --> 00:51:30,920 You're not! It's not about the restaurant. 824 00:51:31,005 --> 00:51:34,174 I just want you to, like, care that I want to go there! 825 00:51:34,675 --> 00:51:36,593 And do you think it's about this guy? 826 00:51:36,677 --> 00:51:39,679 Because I really don't even fucking care about him! He's nice. 827 00:51:39,764 --> 00:51:41,765 - He listens to me. - I'm nice. 828 00:51:41,974 --> 00:51:43,850 But you and I, we are petty, 829 00:51:43,934 --> 00:51:46,019 we are passive-aggressive with each other, 830 00:51:46,103 --> 00:51:49,022 we don't even fight! I mean, this is a miracle right now! 831 00:51:49,857 --> 00:51:53,651 And what I think, honestly, is that we have no house, 832 00:51:53,736 --> 00:51:55,904 we have no kids, thank God! 833 00:51:56,030 --> 00:51:58,907 It would be really fucking easy for us to just walk away! 834 00:51:58,991 --> 00:52:00,450 It'd be super simple. 835 00:52:00,534 --> 00:52:02,202 And that is what I think that we should do. 836 00:52:07,541 --> 00:52:08,875 Hang on, hang on. 837 00:52:14,048 --> 00:52:16,257 You know, let's just not, like, let's just not... 838 00:52:16,342 --> 00:52:17,967 Can we not talk about this anymore? 839 00:52:18,052 --> 00:52:20,595 Let's just go home and sleep on it, and, like... 840 00:52:21,764 --> 00:52:23,765 And like... 841 00:52:24,892 --> 00:52:26,226 Forget it. 842 00:52:28,562 --> 00:52:30,104 I'm gonna go stay at my mom's. 843 00:52:40,908 --> 00:52:42,242 Bye, Jeff. 844 00:52:44,703 --> 00:52:45,995 Jeffrey, where are you? 845 00:52:46,080 --> 00:52:48,957 I asked you to call me after you got the wood glue. 846 00:52:49,041 --> 00:52:50,667 I'm at the office. 847 00:52:50,751 --> 00:52:53,503 Let me know what's going on. Thanks. Bye. 848 00:53:22,992 --> 00:53:24,242 Oh, please. 849 00:54:52,122 --> 00:54:54,749 It sure is a noisy little thing. 850 00:54:54,833 --> 00:54:56,125 Yeah. 851 00:54:56,627 --> 00:54:58,836 - Eight glasses a day, my doctor says. - Really? 852 00:54:58,921 --> 00:55:00,838 You're kidding me. Blow out my biceps 853 00:55:00,923 --> 00:55:03,716 trying to lift these cups that many times. 854 00:55:08,597 --> 00:55:10,390 - I'm Barry. - Sharon. 855 00:55:10,891 --> 00:55:12,517 Nice to meet you. 856 00:55:12,601 --> 00:55:13,935 Same here. 857 00:55:14,019 --> 00:55:15,186 What am I saying? 858 00:55:15,270 --> 00:55:17,438 I know you're Sharon. I've seen you around. 859 00:55:28,492 --> 00:55:30,493 I really do like flowers. 860 00:55:32,496 --> 00:55:33,663 Yeah? 861 00:55:34,039 --> 00:55:35,123 Like, 862 00:55:35,624 --> 00:55:37,542 metaphorically, too. 863 00:55:37,626 --> 00:55:40,962 Symbolically. All kinds. 864 00:55:43,632 --> 00:55:46,342 Gardenias are my favorite. 865 00:55:50,764 --> 00:55:52,306 I'm not following you. 866 00:56:00,524 --> 00:56:01,858 Excuse me. 867 00:56:03,027 --> 00:56:04,318 It was nice meeting you. 868 00:56:17,124 --> 00:56:18,875 Just stupid. 869 00:56:27,843 --> 00:56:28,926 Sharon? 870 00:56:36,518 --> 00:56:38,144 What's going on? 871 00:57:10,594 --> 00:57:12,428 I think it's over. 872 00:57:23,190 --> 00:57:24,524 What happened? 873 00:57:24,733 --> 00:57:25,775 What? 874 00:57:25,859 --> 00:57:28,945 This is not the way I imagined my life was gonna be. 875 00:57:29,530 --> 00:57:30,863 How did you imagine it? 876 00:57:34,701 --> 00:57:38,621 I was gonna be in the Peace Corps and all that crap, you know, 877 00:57:38,705 --> 00:57:42,458 with some guy in an exotic place, 878 00:57:42,543 --> 00:57:46,379 all worldly and giving and shit, 879 00:57:48,048 --> 00:57:50,216 and living in a little hut, 880 00:57:50,551 --> 00:57:54,220 and taking care of cute little kids 881 00:57:55,722 --> 00:57:58,891 and kissing under waterfalls and stuff, you know. 882 00:57:59,560 --> 00:58:03,146 You can still kiss under waterfalls and stuff like that. 883 00:58:03,480 --> 00:58:04,897 It's like, 884 00:58:05,190 --> 00:58:08,067 how many good years do I have left? 885 00:58:08,735 --> 00:58:11,028 I hate my kids right now. 886 00:58:11,113 --> 00:58:14,407 I don't know when that happened. They were so cute. 887 00:58:14,908 --> 00:58:18,744 I look at the pictures of them, and our family... 888 00:58:19,913 --> 00:58:21,080 Don't cry. 889 00:58:21,915 --> 00:58:23,166 Have some more tissue. 890 00:58:30,549 --> 00:58:32,842 - Don't explain. Oh, God. - No. I just... 891 00:58:32,926 --> 00:58:36,721 Oh, Carol, I'm sorry. It'll just make it worse. Don't explain. 892 00:58:36,805 --> 00:58:38,014 But it's not what you think! 893 00:58:38,098 --> 00:58:39,098 Yeah, it is. 894 00:58:45,814 --> 00:58:48,482 I wish that I could 895 00:58:51,945 --> 00:58:55,281 see the world like you. 896 00:58:57,284 --> 00:58:58,492 Really? 897 00:59:00,787 --> 00:59:05,791 I don't know. You have this, like, belief in this cosmic order. 898 00:59:08,003 --> 00:59:11,631 I really envy that. 899 00:59:15,219 --> 00:59:16,761 You don't want to be like me. 900 00:59:18,305 --> 00:59:21,307 I'm not happy 901 00:59:22,309 --> 00:59:23,851 at all. 902 00:59:27,064 --> 00:59:30,233 You know, since Dad died, I've had this... 903 00:59:30,317 --> 00:59:33,444 Had this feeling that it had to be for a reason. 904 00:59:35,489 --> 00:59:39,492 I keep thinking that the signs are all about me, but maybe... 905 00:59:40,494 --> 00:59:42,745 Maybe they're about you and your marriage. 906 00:59:44,331 --> 00:59:48,668 My marriage is not good. 907 00:59:51,338 --> 00:59:52,505 It 908 00:59:55,175 --> 00:59:56,676 is a 909 00:59:57,678 --> 00:59:59,345 disaster. 910 01:00:00,681 --> 01:00:02,056 I just want to feel 911 01:00:03,350 --> 01:00:05,351 like I love Linda. 912 01:00:07,521 --> 01:00:10,523 And I want to feel like she loves me. 913 01:00:15,529 --> 01:00:18,364 And we both want to, like, be in love. 914 01:00:22,536 --> 01:00:26,706 I miss it and I want it so bad. 915 01:00:32,379 --> 01:00:34,547 I think you should just say that. 916 01:00:35,048 --> 01:00:36,382 To her. 917 01:00:39,052 --> 01:00:41,887 It's not that simple, Jeff. 918 01:00:42,681 --> 01:00:44,724 I don't know. I think it could be that simple. 919 01:00:47,060 --> 01:00:50,229 I mean, wouldn't you be psyched if Linda walked in here right now 920 01:00:50,522 --> 01:00:52,940 and sat down in this tub next to you and said, 921 01:00:53,025 --> 01:00:56,027 "Pat, I want to be in love with you again"? 922 01:01:03,243 --> 01:01:05,286 That would be awesome. 923 01:01:07,039 --> 01:01:08,998 Dude, you need to say that to her. 924 01:01:09,082 --> 01:01:11,667 You need to tell her that right now. 925 01:01:30,103 --> 01:01:32,438 - River Parish. - I am so sorry. 926 01:01:32,522 --> 01:01:35,191 Oh, no, I'm sorry. Don't apologize, seriously. 927 01:01:35,275 --> 01:01:37,026 - But I want to. - It's okay. 928 01:01:37,110 --> 01:01:40,863 No, I just... It was so weird and didn't come out the way I... 929 01:01:40,947 --> 01:01:43,449 Yeah, I know, I know, I know. It's just that I'm not gay. 930 01:01:43,533 --> 01:01:45,117 But that's okay. I'm not gay, either. 931 01:01:45,202 --> 01:01:46,619 But you like women. 932 01:01:47,412 --> 01:01:48,621 So? 933 01:01:49,456 --> 01:01:51,123 Well, I like men. 934 01:01:51,416 --> 01:01:55,378 I like men, too. And to me, it's like, at this point in my life, 935 01:01:55,462 --> 01:01:58,339 whether it's a man or a woman, it doesn't matter. 936 01:01:58,423 --> 01:02:00,508 I want someone who gets me. 937 01:02:01,760 --> 01:02:03,844 I feel like I deserve that. 938 01:02:04,471 --> 01:02:06,472 And I think you do, too. 939 01:02:08,975 --> 01:02:10,976 Well, it's important, yes. 940 01:02:11,269 --> 01:02:12,478 But it doesn't mean 941 01:02:12,562 --> 01:02:15,398 I want to sleep with everybody that understands me. That's all. 942 01:02:15,482 --> 01:02:18,067 No, no, no. That's not my intention. 943 01:02:18,151 --> 01:02:20,444 Isn't the most important thing 944 01:02:20,987 --> 01:02:24,657 finding someone who sees you exactly as you are? 945 01:02:25,283 --> 01:02:28,911 Who gets the Peace Corps and the kissing under waterfalls? 946 01:02:34,167 --> 01:02:35,334 Yeah. 947 01:02:40,507 --> 01:02:42,842 So? Carol? Are you there? 948 01:02:44,052 --> 01:02:45,094 Hello? 949 01:02:45,178 --> 01:02:46,762 Shit. 950 01:02:49,891 --> 01:02:51,267 Okay, sorry, everybody. 951 01:02:53,353 --> 01:02:56,814 Just head for the exits! Single file! 952 01:03:04,197 --> 01:03:06,198 Keep it orderly! Please! 953 01:04:19,773 --> 01:04:21,398 Close your eyes. 954 01:04:39,834 --> 01:04:42,461 It's clear. Come on. There's my car, right here. 955 01:04:42,546 --> 01:04:44,296 Where are we going? We're all wet. 956 01:04:44,381 --> 01:04:46,590 - I don't know. What do you think? - I'm sorry, I don't know. 957 01:04:46,675 --> 01:04:48,467 I can't believe I'm doing this. 958 01:04:50,136 --> 01:04:52,596 Let's go to the mall and get drinks with the little umbrellas in them. 959 01:04:52,681 --> 01:04:54,056 Bigger. Wilder. 960 01:04:57,102 --> 01:04:59,895 I haven't been to New Orleans in 20 years. How about that? 961 01:05:00,522 --> 01:05:01,647 It's perfect. 962 01:05:02,524 --> 01:05:04,066 Okay, let's go. 963 01:05:07,862 --> 01:05:10,781 Come on out, everybody! Just come right out. 964 01:06:11,384 --> 01:06:12,384 Shit. 965 01:06:14,471 --> 01:06:15,804 What is this? 966 01:06:16,723 --> 01:06:18,807 It looks like really bad traffic. 967 01:06:18,892 --> 01:06:22,061 Well, I mean in your, you know... 968 01:06:22,395 --> 01:06:24,396 - You mean, like, is it a sign? - I don't know. 969 01:06:24,731 --> 01:06:25,814 It could be. 970 01:06:26,858 --> 01:06:29,568 - It definitely could be. - How do I know what to do? 971 01:06:30,403 --> 01:06:31,987 That's the big question, yeah. 972 01:06:32,072 --> 01:06:34,073 It's a constant struggle. 973 01:06:37,702 --> 01:06:40,579 I think you got to go with your gut. 974 01:06:48,755 --> 01:06:50,506 Well, I'm not going to stop now. 975 01:06:53,259 --> 01:06:54,426 Right? 976 01:06:55,261 --> 01:06:56,553 Hey, Pat? 977 01:06:57,597 --> 01:07:00,599 If we don't get a chance to reconnect today, 978 01:07:02,185 --> 01:07:03,602 I'm, like, super proud of you. 979 01:07:27,794 --> 01:07:30,504 Linda! 980 01:07:32,465 --> 01:07:33,632 Sorry. 981 01:07:40,098 --> 01:07:42,099 - Second thoughts? - Well, I just... 982 01:07:45,687 --> 01:07:47,020 It's okay. 983 01:07:50,984 --> 01:07:52,234 Pat? 984 01:07:52,777 --> 01:07:53,986 Pat! 985 01:07:54,779 --> 01:07:56,655 - I think that's my son. - Sharon? 986 01:07:57,157 --> 01:07:58,157 What now, my man? 987 01:08:00,326 --> 01:08:03,162 I guess I'll go back. 988 01:08:03,496 --> 01:08:05,330 We'll have to wait for all this traffic to clear. 989 01:08:08,001 --> 01:08:09,334 You all right? 990 01:08:11,671 --> 01:08:13,005 Yeah, I'm fine. 991 01:08:13,298 --> 01:08:14,631 I just... 992 01:08:15,467 --> 01:08:17,760 You ever feel like you're waiting forever 993 01:08:17,844 --> 01:08:21,346 to figure out what your destiny is, and then when you do 994 01:08:21,514 --> 01:08:23,724 it's not really that exciting? 995 01:09:03,890 --> 01:09:05,224 Linda! 996 01:09:06,684 --> 01:09:07,726 Pat? 997 01:09:07,977 --> 01:09:09,019 Pat! 998 01:09:09,103 --> 01:09:10,187 Linda! 999 01:09:13,233 --> 01:09:14,566 What are you doing here? 1000 01:09:16,528 --> 01:09:18,028 I want to be in love again. 1001 01:09:18,238 --> 01:09:19,279 What? 1002 01:09:19,948 --> 01:09:22,074 Things have gotten way off track. 1003 01:09:22,951 --> 01:09:24,827 And weird and shitty. 1004 01:09:24,911 --> 01:09:27,746 And I'm a big part of that, and I'm really sorry for it. 1005 01:09:27,831 --> 01:09:29,039 - Pat! - What? 1006 01:09:29,874 --> 01:09:31,834 Honey, what's happening? What's the matter? 1007 01:09:31,918 --> 01:09:33,752 - Why are you running down... - Mom? 1008 01:09:33,837 --> 01:09:35,379 What's going... Oh, hi. 1009 01:09:35,463 --> 01:09:37,631 - Wait, what are you doing here? - What are you doing here? 1010 01:09:37,715 --> 01:09:38,715 How did you get here? 1011 01:09:38,800 --> 01:09:40,676 In Carol’s... This is Carol. 1012 01:09:40,760 --> 01:09:41,969 Hi. 1013 01:09:42,053 --> 01:09:43,136 I'm Linda. Nice to meet you. 1014 01:09:43,221 --> 01:09:44,555 Jeff... Jeff's here? 1015 01:09:46,391 --> 01:09:48,851 Whoa, hey! Did you see that? 1016 01:09:54,607 --> 01:09:56,859 Is he okay? Is he okay? 1017 01:09:56,943 --> 01:09:58,360 Yeah, we're here. 1018 01:09:58,444 --> 01:10:00,779 A car just went off the bridge. 1019 01:10:00,864 --> 01:10:02,614 There's people inside of it. 1020 01:10:10,456 --> 01:10:12,165 Somebody jumped in! 1021 01:10:35,940 --> 01:10:37,900 Wait! Our dad's still down there! 1022 01:10:37,984 --> 01:10:38,984 Fuck. 1023 01:10:39,485 --> 01:10:40,652 Come on. 1024 01:10:41,988 --> 01:10:43,697 Help! Help us! 1025 01:10:43,823 --> 01:10:44,823 Dad! 1026 01:10:45,074 --> 01:10:46,325 Help! 1027 01:10:46,659 --> 01:10:48,577 Come on, girls! Come on. Swim hard! 1028 01:10:48,661 --> 01:10:52,289 Come on, honey! Give me your hand. That a girl. Come on. 1029 01:10:56,336 --> 01:10:58,337 - Get back there. - Dad? 1030 01:11:00,173 --> 01:11:02,215 Hey, the car's going down! 1031 01:11:03,343 --> 01:11:05,010 The car's sinking! 1032 01:11:07,847 --> 01:11:11,475 Dad! 1033 01:11:14,854 --> 01:11:19,691 Jeff! 1034 01:11:20,777 --> 01:11:22,110 Dad! 1035 01:11:22,695 --> 01:11:24,029 Come on, Dad! 1036 01:11:29,035 --> 01:11:30,869 We need some help over here. 1037 01:11:48,554 --> 01:11:49,888 Pat? 1038 01:11:50,598 --> 01:11:52,724 Over here! Over here! 1039 01:11:54,394 --> 01:11:58,730 Pat! 1040 01:12:05,947 --> 01:12:07,114 - Jeff! - Jeff! 1041 01:12:09,117 --> 01:12:11,034 Help! Help! 1042 01:12:11,327 --> 01:12:12,661 Man in the water! 1043 01:12:13,121 --> 01:12:14,287 Help! 1044 01:12:15,957 --> 01:12:19,167 Two survivors in sight. Five feet off the first cleat. 1045 01:12:19,252 --> 01:12:20,585 Coming into the dive deck. 1046 01:12:20,962 --> 01:12:22,004 Hurry! 1047 01:12:22,088 --> 01:12:23,296 Get a hold of him! 1048 01:12:23,381 --> 01:12:25,007 One, two, three! 1049 01:12:30,680 --> 01:12:31,847 Jeff! 1050 01:12:32,015 --> 01:12:33,849 We have an unresponsive person! 1051 01:12:33,933 --> 01:12:35,225 He's not moving! 1052 01:12:35,309 --> 01:12:37,519 Call the command center! Have an ambulance meet us at the pier! 1053 01:12:37,603 --> 01:12:39,438 - Jeff! - Sir, we got to help him. We got him. 1054 01:12:39,522 --> 01:12:41,523 Do something! Jesus! 1055 01:12:41,649 --> 01:12:42,733 Sir, sir. 1056 01:12:42,817 --> 01:12:43,942 Jeff! 1057 01:12:44,777 --> 01:12:46,278 - He's not moving! - Starting CPR! 1058 01:12:46,362 --> 01:12:49,031 Get off me! Leave me alone! 1059 01:12:49,115 --> 01:12:51,241 You need to sit down! 1060 01:12:51,325 --> 01:12:54,828 One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight... 1061 01:12:55,163 --> 01:12:56,663 Jeff, wake up! 1062 01:13:05,006 --> 01:13:06,965 - Jeff! - Still not responding. 1063 01:13:15,683 --> 01:13:16,850 Can you hear me? 1064 01:13:17,018 --> 01:13:18,852 Hey, hey, you okay? 1065 01:13:19,437 --> 01:13:20,437 Hey. 1066 01:13:20,521 --> 01:13:21,688 Sir? 1067 01:13:22,815 --> 01:13:24,149 - Are you okay? - Oh, God. 1068 01:13:25,151 --> 01:13:26,777 Let's get blankets! 1069 01:13:26,903 --> 01:13:28,195 Sir, stay still. 1070 01:13:28,279 --> 01:13:29,780 Let me sit up. 1071 01:13:34,786 --> 01:13:36,453 What happened? 1072 01:13:38,831 --> 01:13:40,207 Everything. 1073 01:13:42,335 --> 01:13:43,710 I'm hungry. 1074 01:15:36,157 --> 01:15:37,824 And coming up next, 1075 01:15:37,909 --> 01:15:39,910 the story of two girls, their father, 1076 01:15:39,994 --> 01:15:43,538 and the man who was in the right place at the right time. 1077 01:15:43,623 --> 01:15:46,875 The car that was behind us crashed into the back of us 1078 01:15:46,959 --> 01:15:48,793 and then we went over the bridge. 1079 01:15:49,337 --> 01:15:51,004 And then this man, 1080 01:15:51,339 --> 01:15:53,465 he just came and broke our window... 1081 01:15:53,549 --> 01:15:56,551 And he almost died doing it. 1082 01:15:57,220 --> 01:15:59,554 If we had lost our dad, 1083 01:16:01,224 --> 01:16:03,975 you know, I just really can't even imagine it. 1084 01:16:04,894 --> 01:16:07,479 We're just really thankful he was there. 1085 01:16:07,563 --> 01:16:09,564 We'll be right back with that rescue tale 1086 01:16:09,649 --> 01:16:13,068 of local councilman Kevin Landry and his two little girls. 1087 01:16:13,152 --> 01:16:15,695 All that and more when we come back.