1
00:00:28,945 --> 00:00:32,948
What up, my lovely females! This is
your boy, Costa, your host for the evening.

2
00:00:33,116 --> 00:00:37,202
Behind me is Thomas Kub's house.
Today is Thomas Kub's birthday.

3
00:00:37,370 --> 00:00:40,581
And this is Project X, yo.

4
00:00:48,590 --> 00:00:51,467
Hey, we want some pussy

5
00:00:56,222 --> 00:00:59,308
Hey, we want some pussy

6
00:00:59,476 --> 00:01:02,186
Birthday cake. Mm.

7
00:01:03,146 --> 00:01:05,898
- Dax, my dick is gonna get so wet tonight.
- Excuse me.

8
00:01:06,066 --> 00:01:08,984
Shit. Um, Mrs. Kub,
I thought you guys left already.

9
00:01:09,152 --> 00:01:13,155
- So, what's getting wet tonight?
- Uh...

10
00:01:13,323 --> 00:01:15,908
Nothing. I'm sorry about that, Mrs. Kub.

11
00:01:16,076 --> 00:01:18,827
- Who's your friend?
- Don't worry about him.

12
00:01:18,995 --> 00:01:21,080
We're shooting this birthday movie
for Thomas.

13
00:01:21,247 --> 00:01:23,582
Like this day-in-the-life type thing.
No big deal.

14
00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:25,876
He's still in the shower.

15
00:01:26,836 --> 00:01:28,212
See you later.

16
00:01:32,050 --> 00:01:34,301
Fuck me, that was close.

17
00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:38,263
Dax.

18
00:01:48,358 --> 00:01:49,858
Happy birthday, motherfucker!

19
00:01:50,026 --> 00:01:52,194
Whoa, shit! What the fuck, dude?

20
00:01:53,279 --> 00:01:55,531
- What the fuck?
- I'm jerking off to your mom.

21
00:01:55,698 --> 00:01:59,284
So, dude, it's your last day
of being a loser. How does it feel?

22
00:01:59,452 --> 00:02:01,745
You're such a dick, Costa.

23
00:02:01,913 --> 00:02:03,664
Shit never gets old.

24
00:02:05,542 --> 00:02:07,501
Wait for another day

25
00:02:07,669 --> 00:02:10,254
What's up, Dax?
How'd they rope you into this?

26
00:02:10,421 --> 00:02:12,297
He's one of J.B.'s guys from Gay-V Club.

27
00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:15,050
He's a fucking weirdo, I know,
but he's a solid shooter.

28
00:02:15,218 --> 00:02:17,845
And he's gonna make us look pimp,
and you fucking better.

29
00:02:19,013 --> 00:02:20,264
Thomas, get down here!

30
00:02:20,431 --> 00:02:22,266
Oh, shit. Let's go.

31
00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:26,562
You said your parents would be gone by 7.

32
00:02:26,729 --> 00:02:28,605
I don't wanna go talk to your fucking dad.

33
00:02:33,194 --> 00:02:36,864
No food in the living room. Your mother
will kill me and I'll have to kill you.

34
00:02:37,031 --> 00:02:39,116
- Here's 40 bucks for pizza, okay?
- Oh, cool.

35
00:02:39,284 --> 00:02:42,161
You guys can have that.
Knock yourself out.

36
00:02:42,328 --> 00:02:44,246
Back door or turn the alarm system off.

37
00:02:44,414 --> 00:02:47,916
And look, Thomas, I'm not an idiot.
I know you're gonna have friends over.

38
00:02:48,084 --> 00:02:50,961
- Dad, what do you think is gonna happen?
- Mr. Kub, honestly, we have no...

39
00:02:51,129 --> 00:02:53,338
Mm-mm. I'm sorry. Who are you?

40
00:02:53,506 --> 00:02:54,798
This is Dax.
What is this?

41
00:02:54,966 --> 00:02:58,051
He's shooting a movie
for my birthday, you know, a little present.

42
00:02:58,219 --> 00:03:01,263
Didn't know you had Goth friends.
He's just a friend from school.

43
00:03:01,431 --> 00:03:02,848
Four or five friends, tops.

44
00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:05,809
I'm just asking that you please
respect my house, okay?

45
00:03:05,977 --> 00:03:07,436
All right, fine.

46
00:03:07,896 --> 00:03:09,855
So leave the gate open for the gardener.

47
00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:13,108
And I know I don't need to tell you,
but my car is off limits.

48
00:03:13,276 --> 00:03:15,277
- Yeah, Dad, I know.
- Good. Okay.

49
00:03:15,445 --> 00:03:17,779
The pool heater, don't touch it.

50
00:03:17,947 --> 00:03:20,657
And also, guys,
do not go in my office, right?

51
00:03:20,825 --> 00:03:24,620
I have three projects I'm working on.
I don't want anybody in there, clear?

52
00:03:24,787 --> 00:03:27,122
- Get out, out, out.
- Dad...

53
00:03:27,790 --> 00:03:30,000
Nothing goes in here, right?

54
00:03:30,293 --> 00:03:33,837
Where's your mom?
I'm gonna get the bags.

55
00:03:35,924 --> 00:03:37,633
What's going on? What's the matter?

56
00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:39,468
- I'm just worried.
- About what?

57
00:03:39,636 --> 00:03:42,179
I don't know.
Thomas, leaving him alone all weekend.

58
00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:45,933
Oh, please, stop it. Come on, honey.
He's 17 years old.

59
00:03:46,100 --> 00:03:47,476
That's what I'm worried about.

60
00:03:48,686 --> 00:03:50,771
Let's be realistic here, okay?

61
00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:54,149
This is Thomas we're talking about.
He's not exactly Mr. Popular.

62
00:03:54,317 --> 00:03:58,070
- What is that supposed to mean?
- I'm just saying that he's not that type of kid.

63
00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:02,324
He's got a couple of friends. They're gonna
hang out, but they're not gonna do anything.

64
00:04:02,492 --> 00:04:04,701
He's a sweet kid, but...

65
00:04:05,828 --> 00:04:07,829
...he's a loser.

66
00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:12,793
Happy birthday to you

67
00:04:14,337 --> 00:04:16,338
- Happy birthday, Thomas.
- Whoo! Yay!

68
00:04:16,506 --> 00:04:17,839
All right, honey, car is here.

69
00:04:18,007 --> 00:04:19,591
- Boys, gotta get to school.
- Cool.

70
00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:22,261
Hold on. We gotta give Thomas
his birthday present.

71
00:04:22,428 --> 00:04:25,180
How cool is it that Thomas
was born on your anniversary?

72
00:04:25,348 --> 00:04:27,724
What a great anniversary gift, a baby.

73
00:04:27,892 --> 00:04:30,018
Happy birthday, sweetie.
Ahh.

74
00:04:30,186 --> 00:04:32,145
- Mom's minivan? Nice.
- Yeah.

75
00:04:32,313 --> 00:04:34,523
It's just for school and back.
That's it, right?

76
00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:37,359
- Yes. Thank you so much.
- Cool, right? You have a car now.

77
00:04:37,527 --> 00:04:39,111
- I know.
- Okay.

78
00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:42,906
And, Milo, you take good care of Thomas,
okay? Momma's gonna miss you.

79
00:04:43,074 --> 00:04:45,284
- Okay, bye.
- All right, see you guys.

80
00:04:45,451 --> 00:04:47,703
Every one of my phone calls
gets answered, right?

81
00:04:47,870 --> 00:04:49,663
- Yeah, I know.
- Every one. Okay.

82
00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:51,373
- All right, have fun.
- Bye.

83
00:04:51,541 --> 00:04:53,834
Happy anniversary.

84
00:04:54,919 --> 00:04:56,545
Get off me, you little faggot dog.

85
00:04:56,713 --> 00:04:58,213
- Yeah!
- It's on, motherfuckers!

86
00:04:58,381 --> 00:05:01,842
- Whoo!
- Dude, chill out. Goddamn.

87
00:05:02,552 --> 00:05:06,096
It was really cool of your mom and dad
to clean it out and wash it for you.

88
00:05:06,264 --> 00:05:09,057
It's a free car.
I'm not about to complain about a free car.

89
00:05:09,225 --> 00:05:12,811
It's not even a car. It's a fucking minivan.
We can't even roll in this.

90
00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:16,273
Dude, too bad your dad didn't give you
the Benz. That'd have been sick.

91
00:05:16,441 --> 00:05:19,776
You know what, you're right, Costa.
Let's just take your car.

92
00:05:19,944 --> 00:05:23,405
- Oh, you don't have one.
- Good fucking joke, good fucking joke.

93
00:05:24,073 --> 00:05:25,949
So, dog, you ready for tonight?

94
00:05:26,117 --> 00:05:30,203
I actually wanna talk to you
about that, you know, before we jump into it.

95
00:05:30,371 --> 00:05:32,789
I knew it. You're bitching out.
What?

96
00:05:34,042 --> 00:05:35,584
What? Dude, I'm not bitching out.

97
00:05:35,752 --> 00:05:38,295
Thomas is bitching out
like the little bitch that he is.

98
00:05:38,463 --> 00:05:41,590
- Fuck you.
- Oh, my God.

99
00:05:43,718 --> 00:05:46,345
- Oh, shit.
- We need this party. You need this party.

100
00:05:46,512 --> 00:05:49,473
I'm just nervous.
What if nobody shows up? What if it sucks?

101
00:05:49,640 --> 00:05:52,934
That's not an option.
People will show up.

102
00:05:53,102 --> 00:05:55,562
Look at J.B. He's like a little fat
Rain Man, texting away.

103
00:05:56,939 --> 00:05:59,941
Dude, stop.
You're telling me he doesn't need this?

104
00:06:05,281 --> 00:06:08,367
Holy shit, dude. Your parents gave
you the minivan? That's awesome!

105
00:06:08,534 --> 00:06:11,119
- Yeah.
- Hey, Costa. Hey, Dax.

106
00:06:12,455 --> 00:06:15,749
That isn't happening. That's not real.

107
00:06:15,917 --> 00:06:18,001
Uh, excuse me...
Sorry.

108
00:06:18,169 --> 00:06:20,462
Hey, can I get to my locker right there?

109
00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:22,714
Dude, why are you staring at my dick?

110
00:06:24,258 --> 00:06:26,343
I wasn't. My locker's there.
Can I get to it?

111
00:06:26,511 --> 00:06:30,972
- Whatever, you fucking weirdo.
- Dude, just let it go. Just come on.

112
00:06:33,309 --> 00:06:37,020
- Hey, that's a sweet minivan, soccer mom.
- See? See what I told you?

113
00:06:38,606 --> 00:06:40,857
Is it true what I heard about you
at Zam's party?

114
00:06:41,025 --> 00:06:42,484
You got a blowjob from his mom?

115
00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:45,320
That party was so sick.
Everyone got laid.

116
00:06:45,488 --> 00:06:47,322
Wheelchair Robert even got a handjob.

117
00:06:47,490 --> 00:06:49,157
- Nice.
- Are you kidding me?

118
00:06:49,325 --> 00:06:51,660
Why the fuck weren't we
at that party, man?

119
00:06:51,828 --> 00:06:53,620
So we missed a party, dude. Big deal.

120
00:06:53,788 --> 00:06:56,081
It is a big deal. We miss every party.

121
00:06:56,249 --> 00:06:59,626
I mean, did you hear that guy?
Wheelchair Robert got beat off.

122
00:06:59,794 --> 00:07:03,171
I wanna show you something.
See this? Check this out.

123
00:07:03,339 --> 00:07:06,174
That's Stasia. Gorgeous, right?
That's my girl back in Queens.

124
00:07:06,342 --> 00:07:09,511
We could be crushing this kind of ass,
but we need a game changer.

125
00:07:09,679 --> 00:07:11,721
I mean, no one even knows who we are.

126
00:07:11,889 --> 00:07:14,975
If we want to be bigtime players,
we need to make a bigtime play.

127
00:07:15,476 --> 00:07:16,685
You feel me?

128
00:07:16,853 --> 00:07:19,354
J.B., what the fuck, man?
Why do you have a boner?

129
00:07:19,522 --> 00:07:22,190
- I don't, it's just my underwear sitting funny.
- Cover up.

130
00:07:22,358 --> 00:07:24,025
That's absolutely disgusting.

131
00:07:24,193 --> 00:07:27,070
It's easy to talk shit when
the party's not even at your house.

132
00:07:27,238 --> 00:07:32,325
Dude, please don't back out.
This party is gonna change everything for us.

133
00:07:32,493 --> 00:07:35,454
Okay. Well, I mean,
I'm the one taking the whole risk.

134
00:07:35,621 --> 00:07:37,372
All you do is show up and drink.

135
00:07:37,540 --> 00:07:39,833
You think we'd ditch you
if something went wrong?

136
00:07:40,001 --> 00:07:42,002
- I'm fucking offended, man.
- Yeah, me too.

137
00:07:42,170 --> 00:07:44,421
The idea behind tonight is
to get these bitches...

138
00:07:44,589 --> 00:07:46,548
...to recognize us as large-scale ballers.

139
00:07:46,716 --> 00:07:49,885
Back in Queens,
I had hoes blowing me on the reg.

140
00:07:50,052 --> 00:07:54,055
- I started hanging out with you two. Zero!
- I just don't really see the point anymore.

141
00:07:54,223 --> 00:07:57,642
How do you not see the point?
There's the point. There's the point.

142
00:07:57,810 --> 00:07:58,852
Okay.

143
00:07:59,020 --> 00:08:01,146
There's two more fucking points
right there! It's all around you.

144
00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:02,355
Dude, I get it.

145
00:08:02,773 --> 00:08:06,318
If you fuck this up, I will stab you.
I'm not kidding.

146
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,737
- Okay, no more than 20 people.
- Twenty people?

147
00:08:08,905 --> 00:08:10,739
- All right, 30 people.
- Thirty people?

148
00:08:10,907 --> 00:08:15,243
- To make sure my house doesn't get fucked.
- Thirty people won't change anything for us.

149
00:08:15,411 --> 00:08:18,121
All right, look, okay, 50 people,
absolute max.

150
00:08:18,289 --> 00:08:21,583
Fine, 50 people, absolute max.

151
00:08:21,751 --> 00:08:23,919
You know, just big enough to be cool.

152
00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:29,549
Sand, an adversary in many ways
more dangerous than those carrying weapons.

153
00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:36,014
Mass marketing, handled.

154
00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:51,488
- Shh.
- Yeah, of course, Jack. Anything.

155
00:08:51,656 --> 00:08:53,865
And if you guys get there
before we get there...

156
00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:56,284
...you can just get in the backyard
and set up...

157
00:08:56,452 --> 00:09:01,289
...and do what you gotta do.
- Dax, Dax. Go film over the top.

158
00:09:01,457 --> 00:09:04,042
Okay. Really, we appreciate that.

159
00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:07,128
Oh, uh... I have to call you back, sir.
I'm sorry.

160
00:09:07,296 --> 00:09:09,464
What are you doing?
Get the fuck out of here!

161
00:09:09,632 --> 00:09:13,051
- What the fuck are you doing?
- Guys. Hey, guys, what the fuck?

162
00:09:14,637 --> 00:09:16,805
Are you fucking with me right now?

163
00:09:16,973 --> 00:09:19,266
Look.
That was a business call for your party.

164
00:09:19,433 --> 00:09:21,393
Who takes a shit and makes a business call?

165
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:23,687
Are you kidding?
Now you can shit in peace.

166
00:09:23,854 --> 00:09:26,815
Come on, dude. I can't see a thing.
It's dark as fuck in here.

167
00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:32,487
Dax, come on. Let's get closer.

168
00:09:32,697 --> 00:09:35,657
Heh, heh.
It should be pretty cool, I think.

169
00:09:35,825 --> 00:09:37,284
Basically chill.

170
00:09:37,451 --> 00:09:39,119
I'm letting Costa plan most of it.

171
00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:42,664
Oh, that sounds like a really
brilliant idea.

172
00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:46,668
No, he's doing a good job. He's getting,
like, a bunch of booze and then...

173
00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:48,628
...I think, like, a DJ.

174
00:09:48,796 --> 00:09:51,631
- A DJ. Super chill.
- Ha.

175
00:09:51,841 --> 00:09:55,552
Guess what Mama Kub
and Papa Kub got for...

176
00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:58,888
- Baby Kub?
...Baby Kub for his birthday.

177
00:09:59,056 --> 00:10:01,057
- What?
- The Kub Mobile.

178
00:10:01,225 --> 00:10:03,518
- They gave you the minivan?
- For my birthday, yes.

179
00:10:03,686 --> 00:10:05,520
Your parents give the worst gifts ever.

180
00:10:05,688 --> 00:10:07,355
- Where's your present?
- You serious?

181
00:10:07,523 --> 00:10:09,691
You haven't gotten me a present
in 10 years.

182
00:10:09,859 --> 00:10:11,276
So?

183
00:10:12,695 --> 00:10:16,656
But since I am a better friend than you,
I did get you something.

184
00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:19,451
- Oh.
- I'll bring it tonight. Hey, I have to go run.

185
00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,953
- Happy birthday, loser.
- Ow.

186
00:10:23,539 --> 00:10:24,873
- Don't trip.
- Ow!

187
00:10:25,041 --> 00:10:27,709
Oh, shit!
I'm okay! Heh.

188
00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:30,545
Thomas, suck my cock.
What?

189
00:10:30,713 --> 00:10:34,257
- "Mama Kub and Papa Kub"? Jesus.
- Yeah, those are my parents, asshole.

190
00:10:35,718 --> 00:10:37,761
Damn, she's so fucking hot, dude.

191
00:10:38,721 --> 00:10:41,806
- Think she'll come tonight?
- I'm not inviting her. You do this one.

192
00:10:41,974 --> 00:10:45,602
Alexis won't come.
She fucks college dudes.

193
00:10:50,691 --> 00:10:54,110
"Lamel"? What? I don't know any Lamel.

194
00:10:54,278 --> 00:10:55,445
No, he's cool.

195
00:10:55,613 --> 00:10:58,573
Guys, the last thing I want in my house
is a bunch of randoms.

196
00:10:58,741 --> 00:11:01,576
Wrong. Last thing you want
is nobody at your fucking house.

197
00:11:01,744 --> 00:11:05,664
The more word gets around, the more likely
these chicks will show up at our party.

198
00:11:07,083 --> 00:11:09,793
Watch and learn how
Captain Big Dick does it.

199
00:11:12,713 --> 00:11:15,382
Hey, girls. Just remember,
wear something tight.

200
00:11:17,885 --> 00:11:20,929
What's up, sisters?
Thomas Kub's house, 8:00.

201
00:11:21,097 --> 00:11:23,223
Come get a piece of this white chocolate.

202
00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:26,059
Are you gonna be going to
Thomas's birthday party tonight?

203
00:11:26,227 --> 00:11:28,353
- Thomas? Who's that?
- Who's Thomas?

204
00:11:32,108 --> 00:11:35,068
That thing that dick in
the sweater vest was telling us about?

205
00:11:35,236 --> 00:11:37,070
What's up, baby? Eight o'clock.

206
00:11:41,283 --> 00:11:43,201
What are your expectations
for the party?

207
00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:46,121
Get high, fuck bitches, you already know.

208
00:11:46,288 --> 00:11:49,416
- I think we'll come. Can we bring people?
- Can I bring people?

209
00:11:49,583 --> 00:11:51,710
Thomas Kub's house, 8:00.

210
00:11:58,676 --> 00:12:00,385
Oh, shit!

211
00:12:01,220 --> 00:12:02,262
Ahh!

212
00:12:04,056 --> 00:12:07,475
What we are witnessing is truly
a breathtaking moment...

213
00:12:07,643 --> 00:12:09,644
...in the life of young Thomas.

214
00:12:09,812 --> 00:12:14,691
The helpless fetus is growing
a tiny, tiny penis...

215
00:12:15,067 --> 00:12:20,238
...a penis he may someday insert
into this female's vagina...

216
00:12:20,531 --> 00:12:26,161
...should he survive his first encounter
without her eating him.

217
00:12:39,842 --> 00:12:41,843
Paper towels. Get long.

218
00:12:42,511 --> 00:12:44,012
- Don't!
- Dude, get a ton.

219
00:12:44,180 --> 00:12:47,557
Oh, shit. Extra-large condoms.
I'm not paying for that shit.

220
00:12:49,435 --> 00:12:51,519
Attention, valued shoppers.

221
00:12:51,687 --> 00:12:52,729
Oh, my God.

222
00:12:52,897 --> 00:12:56,357
Join us for an evening of balls-deep
entertainment at Thomas Kub's house.

223
00:12:56,525 --> 00:12:58,026
Dude, stop.

224
00:13:01,197 --> 00:13:05,283
Hey, little buddy.
Want something to drink? Hey.

225
00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:08,661
He's gonna catch him
and he's gonna get his ass kicked.

226
00:13:13,042 --> 00:13:15,168
You guys, we good on OJ?
Sunny D, dude.

227
00:13:15,336 --> 00:13:17,629
Grab it. Throw it in. I love...

228
00:13:17,797 --> 00:13:19,172
How are we doing on eggs?

229
00:13:21,133 --> 00:13:23,551
Holy shit, dude. It's Miles Teller.

230
00:13:24,887 --> 00:13:27,722
- Dude, it is. That's him. Holy shit.
- He's so badass.

231
00:13:27,890 --> 00:13:30,225
Yeah, my boy's starting
at second base for USC.

232
00:13:30,392 --> 00:13:32,894
He got sent to detention once
and banged the teacher.

233
00:13:33,062 --> 00:13:35,063
Mi-Tell, what's cracking, bro?

234
00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:37,816
- We go to North Pass.
- Yeah, dude, big fans.

235
00:13:37,983 --> 00:13:40,652
- Huge fans.
- Cool. Awesome.

236
00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:42,737
Look, we're making a movie.

237
00:13:43,531 --> 00:13:46,324
Invite him, man. Come on.
All right. Okay. Um...

238
00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:51,704
We're having a soiree at my place tonight.
If you wanna swing by, it should be...

239
00:13:51,872 --> 00:13:54,082
My boy is underselling this
like a motherfucker.

240
00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:56,584
This shit's gonna be legit.
You should swing by.

241
00:13:56,752 --> 00:14:00,213
Yeah, I can't. I actually got other plans
tonight, so I might not make it.

242
00:14:00,381 --> 00:14:04,384
Dude, think about it. It's on Dickens Street.
We'd love to have you.

243
00:14:04,552 --> 00:14:06,427
- Uh, Dickens Street?
- Yeah.

244
00:14:06,595 --> 00:14:08,471
That's your party? You're throwing that?

245
00:14:08,639 --> 00:14:10,932
That's where I'm going.
Heard it's gonna be crazy.

246
00:14:11,100 --> 00:14:13,852
That's my party. I'm Thomas Kub.
It's my birthday today.

247
00:14:14,019 --> 00:14:16,604
Yeah, I heard it's gonna be unlimited
high-school pussy.

248
00:14:16,772 --> 00:14:19,065
Dude, high-school pussy for days.

249
00:14:19,233 --> 00:14:22,110
What? Mind your own business, lady.

250
00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:24,320
How you guys doing on liquor?
You got liquor?

251
00:14:24,488 --> 00:14:25,530
Uh...

252
00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:28,950
Don't even worry about it, man.
I'll bring it, call my boys up.

253
00:14:29,118 --> 00:14:31,619
- Don't want you to sweat anything.
- Thank you so much.

254
00:14:31,787 --> 00:14:34,247
Hey, it's your day. Cool.
See you guys tonight, then.

255
00:14:34,415 --> 00:14:36,249
- All right, cool.
- Dickens Street.

256
00:14:36,417 --> 00:14:39,294
- Teller, bring your mitt. We'll play catch.
- No.

257
00:14:39,461 --> 00:14:41,462
- Fuck.
- "Bring your mitt"? The fuck?

258
00:14:41,630 --> 00:14:43,631
Nothing like black pussy on my dick

259
00:14:43,799 --> 00:14:45,550
Word to the motherfucking DJ Quik

260
00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:48,136
Okay, here's what I want.

261
00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:51,347
Party's limited to the backyard, okay?

262
00:14:51,515 --> 00:14:54,434
The house'll be locked
and the alarm'll be set.

263
00:14:55,144 --> 00:14:57,353
- No one is going inside, all right?
- Stop.

264
00:14:57,521 --> 00:14:59,647
- Throw down in the bushes?
- I don't care.

265
00:14:59,815 --> 00:15:02,984
If I don't fuck a girl with big tits tonight,
I'm drowning myself.

266
00:15:03,152 --> 00:15:06,237
Don't care if she's 300 pounds.
I have to fuck a girl with big tits.

267
00:15:06,405 --> 00:15:08,323
Oh, my God.
Feel my drift, J. B?

268
00:15:08,490 --> 00:15:09,574
Sure do.

269
00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:14,162
I mean, I'd love to get some oral or,
you know, at least do some finger-banging.

270
00:15:14,330 --> 00:15:17,123
What? Finger-banging?
Can you please elaborate?

271
00:15:17,333 --> 00:15:20,335
You take your first finger,
your thumb and your middle finger.

272
00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:22,462
Make a "come here" motion. "Come here."

273
00:15:22,630 --> 00:15:25,173
This is called "machine guns"
or "friendly scissors."

274
00:15:25,341 --> 00:15:27,800
The "circle of pleasure."
The "itsy-bitsy spider."

275
00:15:27,968 --> 00:15:29,928
Tapping and circling. Tap, tap, tap.

276
00:15:30,095 --> 00:15:32,347
Keep telling her how pretty
she is the whole time.

277
00:15:32,514 --> 00:15:34,015
Shut the fuck up!

278
00:15:34,183 --> 00:15:36,643
- Your loss, man. It's good knowledge.
- Oh, my God.

279
00:15:36,810 --> 00:15:39,979
Straight up here, then take a right again.
All right, listen.

280
00:15:40,147 --> 00:15:43,942
The three of us will have full access
to the house for sex and finger-banging.

281
00:15:44,109 --> 00:15:46,319
Yes.
But no one else, okay?

282
00:15:46,487 --> 00:15:48,488
Of course, bro, we got your back.

283
00:15:48,656 --> 00:15:50,031
- Hey, take a right.
- Here?

284
00:15:50,199 --> 00:15:52,867
You're gonna want to lock your doors.
Are you serious?

285
00:15:53,035 --> 00:15:55,703
Yes, I'm serious.
Where the fuck are we going?

286
00:15:55,871 --> 00:15:58,790
T-Rick's.
Gotta score some of that chronic shit.

287
00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:01,459
Are you sure this guy's cool?
T-Rick's the coolest.

288
00:16:01,627 --> 00:16:04,837
He's ex-military. Wait till you see
his gun collection. Fucking insane.

289
00:16:05,005 --> 00:16:06,339
This place is ghetto as fuck.

290
00:16:06,507 --> 00:16:09,842
Why do we have to come
all the way here? We can't just get it at school?

291
00:16:10,010 --> 00:16:12,804
Where do you think the school gets it?
This is wholesale.

292
00:16:12,972 --> 00:16:15,431
You are literally retarded.

293
00:16:15,599 --> 00:16:17,809
Ah, shut the fuck up.

294
00:16:18,227 --> 00:16:20,186
Ah! Fuck.

295
00:16:20,354 --> 00:16:21,938
T-Rick, open up.

296
00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:27,652
- Hey, hey, hey.
- Hey, what's up, bro?

297
00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:30,571
- I haven't seen you in a minute, Costa.
- Yeah.

298
00:16:30,739 --> 00:16:33,408
- Nice to see you.
- How are you doing? Everything copacetic?

299
00:16:33,575 --> 00:16:36,160
Everything's great. You upgraded the dish.
Looks great.

300
00:16:36,328 --> 00:16:38,287
Yeah, I fucking did, upscaled it.

301
00:16:38,455 --> 00:16:40,123
- Upscaled it. I fucking did.
- Yeah.

302
00:16:40,290 --> 00:16:42,250
- These are my boys, J.B. And Thomas.
- Hi.

303
00:16:42,418 --> 00:16:45,044
All right, yeah, yeah.
Come on in, come on in.

304
00:16:50,092 --> 00:16:54,345
Oh, yeah, that was a 12-millimeter
semi-automatic Mossberg Maverick.

305
00:16:54,513 --> 00:16:57,932
- I'd love to go to the range with you.
- Yeah, that's a good idea.

306
00:16:58,100 --> 00:17:01,352
Going on the range,
get it all out of your system.

307
00:17:01,937 --> 00:17:03,896
Pretend you're killing cops, if you want.

308
00:17:04,064 --> 00:17:05,982
You're beautiful

309
00:17:06,817 --> 00:17:09,944
You're beautiful, it's true

310
00:17:11,822 --> 00:17:14,198
I saw your face

311
00:17:14,867 --> 00:17:16,868
In a crowded place

312
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:20,288
All right, well, I'll get your stuff.
Here, stoke up the fires, buddy.

313
00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:22,331
Oh, man, you the man.
Fuck, yeah, T-Rick.

314
00:17:22,499 --> 00:17:24,417
Yeah, kick ass with that.

315
00:17:25,169 --> 00:17:26,753
Hey, can we get going?

316
00:17:28,839 --> 00:17:31,716
Costa, come sit down, dude.
He's about to fucking...

317
00:17:31,884 --> 00:17:34,844
Check it out.
What are you doing?

318
00:17:35,012 --> 00:17:36,471
Fucking stop.

319
00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:39,807
That's technically a homosexual act.

320
00:17:41,351 --> 00:17:43,352
I'm coming on Santa Claus's face.

321
00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:45,271
Costa, he's coming back.

322
00:17:45,439 --> 00:17:47,815
- Dax, take it, take it.
- What the fuck are you doing?

323
00:17:47,983 --> 00:17:50,651
Dude, are you stealing it?
No, we're just borrowing it.

324
00:17:50,819 --> 00:17:53,112
We need a fucking mascot for the party.

325
00:17:54,990 --> 00:17:56,324
Jesus Christ.

326
00:17:56,492 --> 00:17:58,034
Here you go.

327
00:17:58,202 --> 00:18:00,536
Let's do this, I gotta be at the dojo by 5.

328
00:18:00,704 --> 00:18:02,121
- Absolutely.
- Cool.

329
00:18:03,999 --> 00:18:07,376
See, I told you guys,
T-Rick's just a sweetheart. Mm.

330
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:09,962
Smell it, J.B.

331
00:18:10,130 --> 00:18:12,965
- You little fucking cocksuckers!
- Oh, fuck!

332
00:18:13,133 --> 00:18:15,218
- Give me back my fucking gnome!
- Fuck!

333
00:18:15,385 --> 00:18:18,179
Give him the gnome back.
Give him the fucking gnome back.

334
00:18:18,347 --> 00:18:20,389
No, fuck that! Just go.
Get out of here!

335
00:18:20,557 --> 00:18:22,600
Oh, shit!
Oh, fuck!

336
00:18:23,685 --> 00:18:27,021
Holy shit, Thomas, he's fucking wild!
He's a fucking crazy man!

337
00:18:27,189 --> 00:18:29,607
Holy shit! He's gone! He fell off!

338
00:18:32,569 --> 00:18:34,612
- Holy shit, man!
- Holy shit!

339
00:18:38,075 --> 00:18:39,534
Shit, shit, shit!

340
00:18:39,701 --> 00:18:43,121
That's my boy Tom! That was
some serious fucking shit right there!

341
00:18:43,288 --> 00:18:44,705
What in the fucking world?

342
00:18:44,873 --> 00:18:47,458
Fuck. Shit.

343
00:18:47,626 --> 00:18:49,919
Oh, my God.
Shit.

344
00:18:50,254 --> 00:18:53,214
God, dude,
he fucking cracked my windshield.

345
00:18:53,382 --> 00:18:57,552
Fuck it, my cousin owns a body shop.
He can fix it, no problem, man.

346
00:18:58,053 --> 00:18:59,929
The kung fu no good here.

347
00:19:00,097 --> 00:19:02,932
- Oh, fuck! Holy shit!
- Give me back my gnome!

348
00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:06,853
Holy shit!
Guy's like the fucking Terminator! Jesus!

349
00:19:07,020 --> 00:19:10,648
- No, he was super pissed though.
- Dude scares the shit out of me.

350
00:19:11,859 --> 00:19:13,234
Hey, boss.

351
00:19:13,402 --> 00:19:14,777
What the fuck?

352
00:19:14,945 --> 00:19:17,738
There he is.
This is Everett and his boy Tyler.

353
00:19:17,906 --> 00:19:19,740
They're running security for the night.

354
00:19:19,908 --> 00:19:22,410
Are you serious? Are those nunchucks?

355
00:19:22,578 --> 00:19:23,744
- Yeah.
- Oh, shit.

356
00:19:23,912 --> 00:19:25,997
- Look like ninjas.
- Ninjas are fucking pussies!

357
00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:27,582
- I love this kid.
- You know it.

358
00:19:27,749 --> 00:19:29,917
With these two,
we got nothing to worry about.

359
00:19:30,085 --> 00:19:31,919
- We're outside the Kub house.
- Hey.

360
00:19:32,087 --> 00:19:34,088
- We have bogeys.
- What up, Costa?

361
00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:35,631
Do I know you guys?

362
00:19:35,799 --> 00:19:38,092
We heard about your shindig tonight.
We want in.

363
00:19:38,260 --> 00:19:39,343
- You freshmen?
- Yeah.

364
00:19:39,511 --> 00:19:42,096
- Get the fuck out of here, man.
- Come on, dude.

365
00:19:42,264 --> 00:19:45,474
Are you still talking?
Get the fuck out of here.

366
00:19:45,893 --> 00:19:46,934
Dick!

367
00:19:49,479 --> 00:19:52,231
J.B., drop those bags.
We got work to do.

368
00:19:57,779 --> 00:20:00,031
Hi. Good evening, Mrs. Stillson.
My name's Oliver.

369
00:20:00,199 --> 00:20:01,741
This is my friend Jonathan.

370
00:20:01,909 --> 00:20:04,368
- And we're both friends of Thomas Kub's.
- Oh.

371
00:20:04,536 --> 00:20:07,121
Yeah, we're hosting a little birthday party
for Thomas.

372
00:20:07,289 --> 00:20:09,957
And we wanted to give you
the courtesy of informing you...

373
00:20:10,125 --> 00:20:12,793
...that there'd possibly be
a bit of party-related noise.

374
00:20:12,961 --> 00:20:16,172
I wanted to give you my number
in case you had problems or concerns.

375
00:20:16,340 --> 00:20:19,300
You're a very beautiful woman.
Call me anytime you want.

376
00:20:19,468 --> 00:20:22,553
- Thank you. That's very sweet of you.
- I mean that when I say that.

377
00:20:22,721 --> 00:20:23,930
You are very beautiful.

378
00:20:24,097 --> 00:20:26,140
- A little party for Thomas. He lives there.

379
00:20:26,308 --> 00:20:27,600
Am I invited?

380
00:20:27,768 --> 00:20:29,977
- Yeah, dude, fine. Yeah, you can come by.
- Nice.

381
00:20:30,145 --> 00:20:32,521
Thank you very much.
Have a good time at your party.

382
00:20:32,689 --> 00:20:35,274
Thank you, I appreciate this.
Come by anytime you want.

383
00:20:35,442 --> 00:20:37,109
- All right, see you.
- All right.

384
00:20:37,277 --> 00:20:38,736
- Bye, baby.
- See you guys.

385
00:20:56,046 --> 00:21:00,675
Hi, uh, my name's J.B. I'm a friend of
Thomas Kub, your neighbor across the street.

386
00:21:00,842 --> 00:21:03,511
I just wanted to let you know
that we're gonna be having a party...

387
00:21:03,679 --> 00:21:06,806
...and it may get a little loud and noisy,
but I just wanted to let you know...

388
00:21:06,974 --> 00:21:10,685
...that if you have any concerns,
just let me know and I'll be glad to help out.

389
00:21:10,852 --> 00:21:13,479
You can call me, uh,
you could send me a text message.

390
00:21:13,647 --> 00:21:16,482
I'm an open guy. I even have
a Facebook account. You can send me:

391
00:21:16,650 --> 00:21:20,695
"It's a little too loud," and I'll be like, "I'll tell
them to keep it down." You know how it goes?

392
00:21:23,031 --> 00:21:24,407
DJ's over there.
Cool.

393
00:21:24,574 --> 00:21:27,451
- Um, got the bar set up over here.
- Nice.

394
00:21:27,619 --> 00:21:29,161
- Karaoke in the pool house.
- Nice.

395
00:21:29,329 --> 00:21:32,665
Holy shit, dude!
Where'd you get a bouncy-house?

396
00:21:32,833 --> 00:21:35,126
- Costa hooked it up.
- You know it, baby.

397
00:21:35,627 --> 00:21:39,213
Fifty bucks extra with the port-a-potty.
And they threw these in for free.

398
00:21:39,381 --> 00:21:42,758
Nice touch.
Why not? It's a birthday party.

399
00:21:42,926 --> 00:21:44,302
You wanna help? Do something.

400
00:21:44,469 --> 00:21:47,471
- Hey, Chubs, grab your twin brother there.
- Fucking dick.

401
00:21:47,639 --> 00:21:50,266
- Hey, dudes, check it out.
- Yeah, like that's gonna work.

402
00:21:50,434 --> 00:21:53,686
Yes, it is gonna work. Next time
your pool guy's here, he'll be like:

403
00:21:53,854 --> 00:21:57,148
"Excuse me, Mr. Kub. I seem
to have found some water in your semen."

404
00:21:57,316 --> 00:21:59,025
That's fucking disgusting.

405
00:22:03,363 --> 00:22:05,323
J.B., I thought I told you to pick up ice.

406
00:22:05,490 --> 00:22:07,825
I did. It's in the freezer in the garage.

407
00:22:07,993 --> 00:22:10,870
- What the fuck are you doing?
- Getting in shape for the party.

408
00:22:11,038 --> 00:22:13,873
- The party's in three hours.
- It's mostly water weight.

409
00:22:14,041 --> 00:22:17,168
- Wrestlers do it all the time.
- Wrestlers also wrestle all the time.

410
00:22:17,336 --> 00:22:18,502
- Crank this thing up.
- No.

411
00:22:18,670 --> 00:22:21,005
It's not gonna work
unless you crank it up.

412
00:22:22,758 --> 00:22:24,633
Stop. Stop. Stop.

413
00:22:24,801 --> 00:22:26,886
- Let's go, come on.
- Dax. Dax, help me.

414
00:22:27,054 --> 00:22:29,513
- No, Dax, you're here to observe.
- Help me! Dax! Aah!

415
00:22:29,681 --> 00:22:34,852
Jesus Christ! Are you all right, dude?
Oh, my God, J.B., are you all right?

416
00:22:35,020 --> 00:22:38,272
An hour from now,
this place is a fucking madhouse.

417
00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:41,567
Not a madhouse, just gonna be a fun,
decent-sized party.

418
00:22:41,735 --> 00:22:45,029
Relax. For you. You.

419
00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:46,906
Me. Dax.

420
00:22:47,074 --> 00:22:48,991
Thank you, I don't drink alcohol.

421
00:22:49,159 --> 00:22:50,910
Okay, faggot.

422
00:22:51,078 --> 00:22:54,914
- To one sick fucking night.
- Cheers.

423
00:23:00,420 --> 00:23:03,047
Come on over, over

424
00:23:07,594 --> 00:23:08,636
Shit! Come on!

425
00:23:08,804 --> 00:23:11,680
Yes. How are you so fucking bad
at this game, Costa?

426
00:23:11,848 --> 00:23:14,392
Shut up, Kirby.
You're killing my concentration right now.

427
00:23:14,559 --> 00:23:16,519
Ha, ha! Thomas, come here!
Fucker!

428
00:23:16,686 --> 00:23:18,604
I'm kicking Costa's ass!

429
00:23:19,147 --> 00:23:20,689
Oh, watch this.

430
00:23:20,857 --> 00:23:22,858
Shit!
It looks like I win.

431
00:23:23,026 --> 00:23:25,361
- Fuck you.
- You guys, it's like 9:20 already.

432
00:23:25,529 --> 00:23:27,988
Dude, relax.
People are gonna show up. I promise, bro.

433
00:23:28,156 --> 00:23:30,866
- Getting late.
- I'll look like such a dick if no one shows.

434
00:23:31,034 --> 00:23:34,954
Shut the fuck up. It's pissing me off that
you don't trust me to know what I'm doing.

435
00:23:35,122 --> 00:23:38,374
I'm the hub of a large social circle.
I put the word out, it goes out.

436
00:23:38,542 --> 00:23:40,042
Okay, cool.

437
00:23:40,210 --> 00:23:42,586
- Oh, shit.
- What the fuck are you wearing?

438
00:23:42,754 --> 00:23:45,297
My God.
Nice.

439
00:23:46,466 --> 00:23:50,010
- You're gonna get laid, dude.
- Ladies love a guy with class.

440
00:23:50,178 --> 00:23:52,471
Are you retarded?

441
00:23:53,432 --> 00:23:56,559
Jesus Christ, man.
Where do you even get shit like that?

442
00:23:56,726 --> 00:23:59,311
- Men's Wearhouse.
- Men's Wearhouse? Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa.

443
00:24:01,148 --> 00:24:02,606
What is it?

444
00:24:02,774 --> 00:24:06,193
Wow, dude, this is fucking...
I can't believe it fucking worked.

445
00:24:06,361 --> 00:24:08,612
What did I say?
Don't doubt the master, bitches!

446
00:24:22,210 --> 00:24:23,836
Dude, we done good.

447
00:24:24,004 --> 00:24:25,838
Jesus, all those chicks are really hot.

448
00:24:26,006 --> 00:24:28,007
They're coming in packs.
This is insane.

449
00:24:29,384 --> 00:24:32,344
Beat it, I bet she let me
She been fiendin' since she met me

450
00:24:32,512 --> 00:24:35,222
I'm the coolest shit
Especially when I throw on all my Gretzky

451
00:24:35,390 --> 00:24:38,100
Got my Smith and Wessie to protect me
So respect me

452
00:24:40,437 --> 00:24:42,188
What up, baby girl?

453
00:24:42,355 --> 00:24:44,315
Andretti on Pirelli
Make a movie out the getty

454
00:24:44,483 --> 00:24:47,026
Where my ring and my confetti?
I'm Kobe Bryant ready

455
00:24:47,194 --> 00:24:48,819
Pink rose and chronic smelly

456
00:24:49,029 --> 00:24:51,155
Dude, this is way more than 50 people.

457
00:24:51,323 --> 00:24:52,865
Of course it is, it's plus-one.

458
00:24:53,700 --> 00:24:57,203
That's fucking Alexis, dude.
She came, man.

459
00:24:57,370 --> 00:24:59,538
Damn, dude.
Whoa.

460
00:25:00,290 --> 00:25:03,250
Thomas, this is your party,
and she's the hottest girl here.

461
00:25:03,418 --> 00:25:06,420
- That better be yours tonight.
- Damn.

462
00:26:25,792 --> 00:26:28,919
White trash party
Pull a fifth of Bacardi from out of my underwear

463
00:26:29,087 --> 00:26:30,713
And walk around the party without a care

464
00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:33,799
- Where the fuck is your drink, Thomas?
- I'm between beverages.

465
00:26:33,967 --> 00:26:37,261
What the fuck does that even mean?
J.B., get this bitch a drink.

466
00:26:37,429 --> 00:26:38,929
Yeah, all right.

467
00:26:40,181 --> 00:26:43,058
Everybody in the club gettin' tipsy

468
00:26:43,810 --> 00:26:45,477
Who's that dude with the mustache?

469
00:26:45,645 --> 00:26:48,063
Oh, that's LaRosa. He graduated.

470
00:26:48,231 --> 00:26:50,649
When, in 1986?

471
00:26:50,817 --> 00:26:53,277
Hey, will you at least try
and have a good time?

472
00:26:53,445 --> 00:26:55,154
Whoo!

473
00:26:55,405 --> 00:26:56,864
Got it? You tie it?

474
00:26:57,032 --> 00:26:59,825
He's good. Ready to go.
Blast off.

475
00:27:04,289 --> 00:27:06,832
Pennies up at skinnies
Man, I do this for them bunnies

476
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:08,792
That is not fucking cool.

477
00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:10,586
Oh, my God, it's a flying dog!

478
00:27:10,754 --> 00:27:13,047
'Cause, homey
That hood is tighter than Kenny's

479
00:27:14,549 --> 00:27:16,342
It's just like Up.

480
00:27:16,509 --> 00:27:18,677
It's my fucking dog.

481
00:27:18,845 --> 00:27:20,179
I gotta record this.

482
00:27:20,347 --> 00:27:22,014
Are you serious right now?

483
00:27:22,182 --> 00:27:25,184
- Fuck this, I'm putting him inside.
- Let me help you.

484
00:27:26,478 --> 00:27:27,853
Hey.

485
00:27:30,732 --> 00:27:33,776
Can you imagine
if your mom ever saw that?

486
00:27:34,194 --> 00:27:35,444
It's my fucking dog.

487
00:27:35,612 --> 00:27:37,112
Poor Milo.

488
00:27:38,531 --> 00:27:40,949
I don't know. It's pretty funny.

489
00:27:41,117 --> 00:27:44,453
- Maybe I'll post it on YouTube.
- No, don't, don't, don't.

490
00:27:44,621 --> 00:27:45,913
Seriously, stop. Stop.

491
00:27:46,081 --> 00:27:49,291
Come on, you're way too easy. I love it.

492
00:27:49,459 --> 00:27:50,918
I hate you.

493
00:27:52,379 --> 00:27:55,172
You'll be okay, Milo. I promise.

494
00:27:59,552 --> 00:28:03,889
All right, well, um,
we better get back out there.

495
00:28:06,059 --> 00:28:07,851
Hey, yo, Kub. Hey, yo, what up, dog?

496
00:28:08,019 --> 00:28:09,561
Yo, what's up, bro?

497
00:28:09,729 --> 00:28:12,981
Let me see what you got
Now shake that thing

498
00:28:13,149 --> 00:28:15,192
- Hey, man, what's up?
- Nice party, man.

499
00:28:15,360 --> 00:28:18,153
Hey, thanks. Would you guys mind
getting off my dad's car?

500
00:28:18,321 --> 00:28:20,698
It's just he'll go crazy
if anything happens to it.

501
00:28:20,865 --> 00:28:22,241
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
- All right.

502
00:28:22,409 --> 00:28:24,743
- Thanks, man, I appreciate it.
- Yeah, no problem.

503
00:28:24,911 --> 00:28:27,162
Thomas! You're taking a bullet
from me right now.

504
00:28:27,330 --> 00:28:29,581
- What is that?
- Tequila. Just fucking take it.

505
00:28:29,749 --> 00:28:31,583
- All right. Fuck, dude.
- Come here. Come on.

506
00:28:31,751 --> 00:28:34,294
Ladies, who wants to take a shot
with the birthday boy?

507
00:28:34,462 --> 00:28:36,547
- Hell, yeah.
- Whoa, uh... Oh.

508
00:28:36,715 --> 00:28:38,924
Careful.
She's a professional. Open up.

509
00:28:39,092 --> 00:28:41,468
Take it. Oh, my God,
she's got a deep throat.

510
00:28:41,636 --> 00:28:45,723
- Okay, open up, open up. Now.
- Yeah!

511
00:28:46,725 --> 00:28:49,017
Say what
Bitch, I'm about to blow up

512
00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:53,272
Pardon? Oh, hey.
Hey.

513
00:28:53,773 --> 00:28:56,191
- What's up, guys?
- Well, we did it.

514
00:28:56,359 --> 00:28:59,111
This is amazing. How did we get
all these people to show up?

515
00:28:59,279 --> 00:29:02,531
Check it out, guys.
I'm pretty sure it's that girl from Playboy.

516
00:29:02,699 --> 00:29:04,116
Who?
Oh, my God, it is her.

517
00:29:04,284 --> 00:29:07,494
She graduated three years ago.
She's in Playboy's Pac-10 issue.

518
00:29:07,662 --> 00:29:09,997
- Dibs.
- Yeah, like that's gonna happen.

519
00:29:10,165 --> 00:29:11,915
Well, I want to declare it, just in case.

520
00:29:13,501 --> 00:29:15,377
- Whoa.
- Oh, shit.

521
00:29:17,046 --> 00:29:18,255
We're fucked!

522
00:29:18,423 --> 00:29:20,048
What? Oh, hey, what's going on?

523
00:29:20,216 --> 00:29:22,968
- There's people in the house!
- Oh, shit.

524
00:29:23,136 --> 00:29:24,595
- Hey, Costa.
- I'm understaffed.

525
00:29:24,763 --> 00:29:27,431
- Come on, I need your fucking help, man.
- Goddamn it.

526
00:29:27,599 --> 00:29:29,641
Wow. Whoa.

527
00:29:31,478 --> 00:29:35,063
Hey. Hey, hi. Hi. Welcome.
Welcome to party. Welcome, welcome.

528
00:29:35,231 --> 00:29:36,273
- Yo!
- Miles!

529
00:29:36,441 --> 00:29:38,442
Little dude. What's up, man?
How we doing?

530
00:29:38,610 --> 00:29:40,652
- That's Ashley, Rachel, Sarah.
- Hi, hi.

531
00:29:40,820 --> 00:29:44,114
I brought all these people to your party.
Fucking camera creeps me out.

532
00:29:44,282 --> 00:29:46,784
- Yeah, it's... Don't worry.
- Let's go.

533
00:29:46,951 --> 00:29:49,495
I'm talking about the fucking people
in the house.

534
00:29:49,662 --> 00:29:52,998
My parents are gonna crucify me
if anything gets fucked up.

535
00:29:53,166 --> 00:29:57,419
I don't care if everyone thinks I'm a dick.
I'm getting them out of the house. Now.

536
00:29:57,587 --> 00:29:59,797
Fuck, hey, stop, seriously.

537
00:30:00,423 --> 00:30:02,549
Dude, what the fuck are you doing?

538
00:30:03,259 --> 00:30:05,719
- Please don't embarrass me like this.
- Hey, listen up!

539
00:30:05,887 --> 00:30:07,554
Yeah, Thomas! Whoo!

540
00:30:11,017 --> 00:30:15,354
Yeah, bro! Birthday boy on the table!
That's what I like to see, baby.

541
00:30:15,522 --> 00:30:16,897
- You having a good time?
- Yeah.

542
00:30:17,065 --> 00:30:21,401
Come on, guys, let's start making
some drinks. Let's get crazy in this bitch.

543
00:30:28,326 --> 00:30:29,993
Can I help you, sir?

544
00:30:30,161 --> 00:30:32,621
- I'm here to see Thomas.
- First and last name, please.

545
00:30:32,789 --> 00:30:34,790
I'm Rob, the neighbor.
Who the fuck are you?

546
00:30:34,958 --> 00:30:38,043
- I'll ask the questions, sir.
- Exactly. Get the hell out of my way.

547
00:30:48,388 --> 00:30:50,389
- Rob, hey. What can I do for you, man?
- Hey.

548
00:30:50,557 --> 00:30:53,225
Look, man, I don't mean to be
a dick here or anything.

549
00:30:53,393 --> 00:30:56,854
Oliver came over earlier and told me
you guys were having a little party...

550
00:30:57,021 --> 00:30:58,272
...but this is too much.

551
00:30:58,439 --> 00:31:01,900
Yeah, we actually should be winding down,
like midnight, I mean, maybe 1.

552
00:31:02,068 --> 00:31:03,402
- Is that okay?
- No, it's not.

553
00:31:03,570 --> 00:31:05,904
The baby can't sleep,
Melinda works early tomorrow.

554
00:31:06,072 --> 00:31:08,907
Fuck, yeah!
My boy Rob is here to rage! Mwah!

555
00:31:09,075 --> 00:31:11,285
- Good to see you.
- Actually, I'm not raging.

556
00:31:11,452 --> 00:31:13,537
I'm telling Thomas
it's time to shut it down.

557
00:31:13,705 --> 00:31:15,706
You can't be serious.
This is a great party.

558
00:31:15,874 --> 00:31:18,917
I am serious, because it's 11:30 at night.
It's time to wrap it up.

559
00:31:19,085 --> 00:31:20,919
Hey, hey, hey.

560
00:31:21,087 --> 00:31:23,755
Why don't we bring everyone to the back,
lower the volume?

561
00:31:23,923 --> 00:31:26,258
Guys, this isn't a request.
The party's over.

562
00:31:26,426 --> 00:31:29,678
I guess we're just gonna have to
agree to disagree, then, aren't we?

563
00:31:29,846 --> 00:31:32,764
Listen to me, Thomas.
Either shut it down or I'm calling the cops.

564
00:31:32,932 --> 00:31:34,516
Ahh.

565
00:31:34,684 --> 00:31:36,935
Fine. Fuck it.
I'm calling the fucking cops... Aah!

566
00:31:37,103 --> 00:31:38,937
Fuck!
Oh, shit!

567
00:31:39,105 --> 00:31:41,773
Jesus fucking Christ!
What'd you do that for?

568
00:31:41,941 --> 00:31:44,776
Are you kidding me?
I will fucking kill you!

569
00:31:44,944 --> 00:31:47,779
The little fuck Tased me!
I'm definitely calling the cops now!

570
00:31:47,947 --> 00:31:50,657
You punched a kid in the face!
I'm calling the cops on you.

571
00:31:50,825 --> 00:31:54,161
Do it, genius. It's all on tape.
I just saw this motherfucker record it.

572
00:31:54,329 --> 00:31:56,872
All I got was you punching
that little child's face.

573
00:31:57,040 --> 00:31:58,332
Fuck you.

574
00:31:58,499 --> 00:31:59,791
Go home, Robert!

575
00:31:59,959 --> 00:32:02,002
It was just a kid, man!

576
00:32:03,630 --> 00:32:05,756
- Are you all right, man?
- Is he okay?

577
00:32:05,924 --> 00:32:07,382
You're a fucking champion.

578
00:32:07,550 --> 00:32:10,802
He sucker-punched you.
You'd own that bitch in a real fight.

579
00:32:10,970 --> 00:32:12,137
- You think so?
- I know so.

580
00:32:12,305 --> 00:32:14,306
Fuck that asshole. You're killing it, bro.

581
00:32:14,474 --> 00:32:17,059
- Yo, Costa, what's up?
- Yo, go in the back.

582
00:32:17,226 --> 00:32:20,979
I need you to dial back like 10, 15 percent.
You can't hard-charge all the time.

583
00:32:21,147 --> 00:32:23,231
All right? And lose the Taser, okay?

584
00:32:23,399 --> 00:32:25,651
- Got it.
- Get down here.

585
00:32:25,818 --> 00:32:28,028
We need a post
up at the cockbiter's house.

586
00:32:28,196 --> 00:32:31,740
If he calls the cops,
I want you to radio it over to me, okay?

587
00:32:34,661 --> 00:32:36,662
Get out of here. Go.

588
00:32:44,545 --> 00:32:47,881
Alexis was eye-fucking you,
and you got college girls on your dick.

589
00:32:48,049 --> 00:32:49,841
- You're golden!
- Dude, I'm so fucked.

590
00:32:50,009 --> 00:32:53,095
- Relax, man, everything's going great.
- Shit.

591
00:32:53,262 --> 00:32:56,264
Are you fucking kidding me?
Didn't I tell you two to fuck off?

592
00:32:56,432 --> 00:32:59,142
- Get down here now.
- Come on, there's like 200 people here.

593
00:32:59,310 --> 00:33:01,812
I don't care.
T, get these freshmen out of here.

594
00:33:01,980 --> 00:33:04,690
This is a party for grownups.
Let's fucking go.

595
00:33:04,857 --> 00:33:06,984
Makes no sense.
This kid's younger than we are.

596
00:33:07,151 --> 00:33:09,611
- How the hell did they get up there?
- Move it, fellas.

597
00:33:09,779 --> 00:33:12,531
- You too, get out of here.
- That's my boy. That's my boy.

598
00:33:12,699 --> 00:33:15,117
See, the kid's a pro.
We got nothing to worry about.

599
00:33:15,284 --> 00:33:17,786
Dude, you heard Rob, man.
What if he calls the cops?

600
00:33:17,954 --> 00:33:21,039
The guy isn't gonna do shit.
He punched a 12-year-old in the face.

601
00:33:21,207 --> 00:33:24,918
Thomas, everything's under control.
Let's just have some fun.

602
00:33:25,086 --> 00:33:27,212
I got this, okay?

603
00:33:30,550 --> 00:33:32,718
Cannonball, bitches!

604
00:33:41,060 --> 00:33:44,771
I don't care for fancy things

605
00:33:44,939 --> 00:33:48,900
Or to take part in the vicious race

606
00:33:49,485 --> 00:33:51,570
This is the Thomas Kub pool cam.

607
00:33:51,738 --> 00:33:53,655
Dude, check it out. Check it out.

608
00:33:53,990 --> 00:33:56,074
Whoa, whoa, whoa, read the sign, honey.

609
00:33:56,242 --> 00:33:58,869
Sorry, I don't make the rules.

610
00:33:59,037 --> 00:34:01,079
Ray-Ban vision, these ain't no prescription

611
00:34:02,707 --> 00:34:04,708
No fucking way.

612
00:34:04,876 --> 00:34:06,168
Dude, go over there.

613
00:34:06,335 --> 00:34:08,253
Do you fucking believe this?

614
00:34:15,178 --> 00:34:20,098
In this, feelin' tremendous
Lenses darker than the tint on my Benzes

615
00:34:20,266 --> 00:34:21,558
Yeah! Ha, ha!

616
00:34:22,977 --> 00:34:26,021
She told me take my glasses off
But she looks horrendous

617
00:34:39,869 --> 00:34:42,287
I see you haters coming
Niggas don't think that I'm slipping

618
00:34:42,455 --> 00:34:44,122
I got Ray-Ban vision

619
00:34:47,168 --> 00:34:48,543
Whoo!

620
00:34:48,920 --> 00:34:49,961
Whoo-hoo!

621
00:34:54,926 --> 00:34:57,427
- Oh, my God!
- Holy shit! Fucking insane!

622
00:35:02,642 --> 00:35:05,852
Oh, my God.
Dude, that sign fucking worked.

623
00:35:06,020 --> 00:35:07,312
You gotta have faith, son.

624
00:35:07,480 --> 00:35:09,397
Would you like a glass of wine?

625
00:35:09,565 --> 00:35:13,193
We've got red, we've got white.
You know, Cabernet, Merlot.

626
00:35:13,361 --> 00:35:14,903
Just another beer would be great.

627
00:35:15,071 --> 00:35:16,530
Uh...

628
00:35:16,989 --> 00:35:18,365
Here we are.

629
00:35:21,828 --> 00:35:23,411
Whoa.

630
00:35:30,336 --> 00:35:33,171
Wow. Okay.

631
00:35:42,515 --> 00:35:45,642
How did this thing get up here?
Was someone in my parents' room?

632
00:35:45,810 --> 00:35:48,854
It's a gnome. I guess he gets around.
Who cares, man?

633
00:35:49,021 --> 00:35:51,022
Well, I just don't want people up here.

634
00:35:51,190 --> 00:35:53,150
Besides, it's creepy. Look at him.

635
00:35:54,861 --> 00:35:57,863
- J.B., what are you looking for?
- To see if your dad has condoms.

636
00:35:58,030 --> 00:35:59,197
I'm working on something.

637
00:35:59,365 --> 00:36:01,908
Only thing you're working on
is diabetes, you fat fuck.

638
00:36:02,076 --> 00:36:06,037
- Oh, dude, Alexis just texted me.
- What? What's it say?

639
00:36:06,205 --> 00:36:08,874
"Body shots for the birthday boy
right now"?

640
00:36:09,041 --> 00:36:11,835
- Dude, it's fucking on!
- Check it out.

641
00:36:12,003 --> 00:36:14,713
- J.B., seriously, what are you doing?
- Your dad is a freak.

642
00:36:14,881 --> 00:36:19,050
Stop. Give me that. Costa, stop, wait.
Costa, what are you doing?

643
00:36:19,218 --> 00:36:21,428
- Replying.
- Don't. Here, don't send that.

644
00:36:21,596 --> 00:36:25,015
- Sent. Too late, man.
- What did you write?

645
00:36:25,725 --> 00:36:28,226
"I want your ass too, Mommy"?

646
00:36:28,394 --> 00:36:30,604
"I want your ass, Mommy"?
Who talks like that?

647
00:36:30,771 --> 00:36:32,772
I do. The shit works.

648
00:36:32,940 --> 00:36:35,817
Go. Go talk to her.

649
00:36:36,903 --> 00:36:37,944
Oh.

650
00:36:53,461 --> 00:36:56,421
Hey, hey, hey, hey

651
00:37:04,472 --> 00:37:08,266
Wait. No, wait. What are you doing?
Not like that. Not like that.

652
00:37:09,727 --> 00:37:11,436
Like this.

653
00:37:14,148 --> 00:37:15,899
Put this in your mouth.

654
00:37:42,343 --> 00:37:43,635
Your turn.

655
00:37:43,803 --> 00:37:46,304
Kub! House phone! House phone!

656
00:37:48,432 --> 00:37:50,850
Shit. Sorry. Um...

657
00:37:51,435 --> 00:37:55,689
Excuse me. Sorry. Look out.
Sorry. Sorry. Excuse me.

658
00:37:55,856 --> 00:37:58,149
Oh, shit. Sorry.

659
00:38:05,283 --> 00:38:07,450
Dax, close that behind you.

660
00:38:07,618 --> 00:38:09,369
Shit! Dax, find the phone.

661
00:38:11,289 --> 00:38:13,665
Um, right, you know what?
Fuck it, just be quiet.

662
00:38:14,250 --> 00:38:16,293
- Hello.
- Thomas. Are you there?

663
00:38:16,460 --> 00:38:17,919
- Dad, hey.
- Where have you been?

664
00:38:18,087 --> 00:38:19,838
We've been trying your cell all night.

665
00:38:20,006 --> 00:38:23,925
- We agreed all my calls would be answered.
- I know. Yeah, I'm sorry about that.

666
00:38:24,093 --> 00:38:26,553
We were out in the hot tub,
so I didn't have it on me.

667
00:38:26,721 --> 00:38:29,014
I don't want to find wet towels
when we get home.

668
00:38:29,181 --> 00:38:32,017
- I want to come home to a clean house.
- Of course, definitely.

669
00:38:32,184 --> 00:38:35,228
- We were just calling... What was that?
- Dude, look at her.

670
00:38:35,396 --> 00:38:37,355
What was that? Thomas?

671
00:38:37,523 --> 00:38:40,608
Nothing. That was Costa.
You're on speakerphone.

672
00:38:40,776 --> 00:38:43,570
We just wanted to call one last time
before going to bed...

673
00:38:43,738 --> 00:38:46,364
...make sure you're all set for the night.

674
00:38:46,532 --> 00:38:48,700
Yep, all good.

675
00:38:48,868 --> 00:38:52,329
I'm actually about to
go to sleep right now, so...

676
00:38:52,496 --> 00:38:55,248
Great. Well, we'll see you Sunday.
Happy birthday, Thomas.

677
00:38:55,416 --> 00:38:58,001
- Thanks, Dad. Good night.
- Good night.

678
00:39:06,302 --> 00:39:07,719
Holy shit.

679
00:39:14,852 --> 00:39:16,394
Fuck, yeah!

680
00:39:16,562 --> 00:39:18,313
Oh, shit, I think that's his dad.

681
00:39:18,481 --> 00:39:21,733
What? I'm not here to bust anybody.
I'm just here to party.

682
00:39:21,901 --> 00:39:23,568
- Ew!
- Come on, "Ew."

683
00:39:23,736 --> 00:39:25,236
Give me a break. You got a ball?

684
00:39:25,404 --> 00:39:27,197
- Yeah, man.
- Let's do this.

685
00:39:27,365 --> 00:39:30,325
Here we go. Paxson for three.

686
00:39:30,493 --> 00:39:32,035
Whoa, ho, ho, ho!

687
00:39:32,203 --> 00:39:36,247
Up high!
Come on, dude, right here. Yeah!

688
00:39:36,415 --> 00:39:38,416
Let me have that.

689
00:39:46,342 --> 00:39:47,384
Hey

690
00:39:49,095 --> 00:39:50,512
Nasty, kid

691
00:39:51,222 --> 00:39:52,430
Hey

692
00:39:52,598 --> 00:39:56,184
What's that, dude? Hold on,
I can't fucking hear a thing you're saying.

693
00:39:57,436 --> 00:39:59,104
Speak up, E.

694
00:39:59,271 --> 00:40:02,899
What? E...
What the fuck are you doing here?

695
00:40:03,067 --> 00:40:06,111
- What you gonna do about it, bitch?
- You're not invited, dickhead.

696
00:40:08,864 --> 00:40:10,573
Fucking asshole.

697
00:40:13,577 --> 00:40:14,619
Bro, what's happening?

698
00:40:14,787 --> 00:40:17,831
Subject is arguing with
an overweight woman, most likely his wife.

699
00:40:17,998 --> 00:40:20,959
She wants him to call the police.
He wants to handle it himself.

700
00:40:21,127 --> 00:40:23,253
He's drinking. They're in the kitchen.

701
00:40:23,421 --> 00:40:25,797
I'm upstairs. Kids are asleep. Over.

702
00:40:25,965 --> 00:40:27,340
Wait, you're in their house?

703
00:40:29,260 --> 00:40:31,970
Are you fucking kidding me?
E, get the fuck out now!

704
00:40:33,139 --> 00:40:35,306
Negative. I'm a ghost. Out.

705
00:40:35,724 --> 00:40:38,351
What the fuck am I gonna do with this kid?

706
00:40:38,519 --> 00:40:39,978
E! E!

707
00:41:09,717 --> 00:41:12,427
Are you having fun?
Yeah, I'm having a good time.

708
00:41:12,595 --> 00:41:14,512
It's pretty fucking crazy.

709
00:41:17,308 --> 00:41:19,350
Oh, my God.

710
00:41:19,518 --> 00:41:21,895
What was wrong with me?

711
00:41:22,062 --> 00:41:25,023
Wow, this was before Costa.

712
00:41:25,191 --> 00:41:27,650
Yeah, the good old days.

713
00:41:27,818 --> 00:41:30,445
Yeah, back when you were
still in the crew, right?

714
00:41:32,114 --> 00:41:33,948
You used to be so cute. What happened?

715
00:41:34,116 --> 00:41:35,366
Shut the fuck up.

716
00:41:35,951 --> 00:41:37,535
Still looks like me.

717
00:41:43,751 --> 00:41:46,878
Was that weird? I'm sorry.
Shit, that was weird, wasn't it?

718
00:41:47,046 --> 00:41:49,881
- No, it... It was a little weird. Heh.
- Fuck. Um...

719
00:41:55,471 --> 00:41:57,388
Cops on the way.
Get out, everybody! Now!

720
00:41:57,556 --> 00:42:00,058
Everybody in the back!
Get in the back now!

721
00:42:00,226 --> 00:42:03,853
What, are you over there? Get in the back!
Cops are coming! Hurry, let's move!

722
00:42:04,021 --> 00:42:08,107
Move it, move it! Let's go! Hurry up!
Cops are coming! Everybody in the back!

723
00:42:08,275 --> 00:42:10,902
Costa. Hey, Costa.

724
00:42:11,070 --> 00:42:12,487
Everybody get in the back!

725
00:42:12,655 --> 00:42:13,905
Hey, what's going on?

726
00:42:14,073 --> 00:42:17,408
The cops are on their way right now!
Oh, shit.

727
00:42:17,576 --> 00:42:22,121
Get in the back now!
Everybody move! Let's go!

728
00:42:23,415 --> 00:42:25,667
Keep going! Get in the back now!

729
00:42:26,126 --> 00:42:28,127
Get out, police.
They're on their way now.

730
00:42:28,295 --> 00:42:30,838
How do you know that?
Don't ask. My boy's in deep.

731
00:42:31,006 --> 00:42:33,299
Gotta clear this fucking beer out of here.

732
00:42:33,467 --> 00:42:35,260
Damn it.

733
00:42:36,095 --> 00:42:38,972
- Is that everything?
- Yeah. I got your chalice.

734
00:43:01,120 --> 00:43:03,079
Law enforcement currently on scene.

735
00:43:03,247 --> 00:43:06,124
Standing down, for now.

736
00:43:13,799 --> 00:43:17,385
- I don't hear anything.
- No, it doesn't sound like a party.

737
00:43:18,470 --> 00:43:21,306
Not a party that's still going, anyway.

738
00:43:29,982 --> 00:43:31,649
Here they come.

739
00:43:31,817 --> 00:43:34,235
- Evening, officers.
- Fellas having a party?

740
00:43:34,403 --> 00:43:37,530
Yeah, we're having a small little
birthday gathering for my friend.

741
00:43:37,698 --> 00:43:40,325
I'm the friend, my birthday.

742
00:43:40,492 --> 00:43:42,452
Lot of cars for a small party.

743
00:43:42,620 --> 00:43:48,875
Shh.

744
00:43:54,465 --> 00:43:56,299
The house? Whose is it?

745
00:43:56,467 --> 00:43:58,217
Is there a problem here, officers?

746
00:43:58,385 --> 00:44:00,345
We have a noise complaint.

747
00:44:00,512 --> 00:44:03,222
- You mind if we look around?
- I'd prefer if you didn't.

748
00:44:03,390 --> 00:44:06,225
- We're not asking.
- Excuse me, I'm not a lawyer or anything.

749
00:44:06,393 --> 00:44:08,519
Doesn't the law state that
you cannot enter...

750
00:44:08,687 --> 00:44:10,938
...through a private residence
without permission?

751
00:44:12,191 --> 00:44:14,484
Is there an adult here
we might speak with?

752
00:44:14,652 --> 00:44:17,403
You're speaking with one.
I'm 18 and a half years old, sir.

753
00:44:17,571 --> 00:44:21,199
And, of course, in my culture
I've been a man since my 13th birthday.

754
00:44:21,367 --> 00:44:23,701
So you're telling us we cannot come in?

755
00:44:23,869 --> 00:44:26,537
With all due respect,
technically the law says you cannot.

756
00:44:26,705 --> 00:44:28,790
But what we're saying is, you may not.

757
00:44:28,957 --> 00:44:32,627
I guess both are true. The law says
you cannot because we say you may not.

758
00:44:32,795 --> 00:44:36,464
All right, all right. Props on
the "can/may" bullshit. Very good.

759
00:44:36,632 --> 00:44:38,049
No doubt. Thank you, sir.

760
00:44:38,217 --> 00:44:41,511
Just keep the noise down
to a minimum, okay?

761
00:44:41,679 --> 00:44:43,221
Yes, sir. Of course.

762
00:44:43,722 --> 00:44:46,391
Don't make us come back.
You know what I mean?

763
00:44:46,558 --> 00:44:49,143
- Yeah.
- Uh-huh. Of course.

764
00:44:49,311 --> 00:44:50,395
- Good night.
- Officers.

765
00:44:50,562 --> 00:44:51,938
Night.

766
00:44:52,815 --> 00:44:56,901
"Technically the law states..."
Damn Internet.

767
00:44:57,277 --> 00:44:59,696
Everybody's a fucking attorney.

768
00:45:12,584 --> 00:45:15,586
- Fuck you.
- Dude, Costa. Seriously?

769
00:45:15,754 --> 00:45:16,838
- Fuck you.
- Come inside.

770
00:45:17,005 --> 00:45:19,590
Just come inside. Just forget about it.

771
00:45:30,936 --> 00:45:33,271
To the break of dawn, yo!

772
00:47:02,027 --> 00:47:04,362
Holy shit!
What the fuck are you doing?

773
00:47:06,365 --> 00:47:10,326
Thomas, my cousin can replace the window,
no problem. It's all good, man. I promise.

774
00:47:23,215 --> 00:47:26,843
- Where did you get this? It's my mom's.
- Come on, bro. I'm not gonna break it.

775
00:47:36,895 --> 00:47:38,896
Throw it in here, nice and low.

776
00:47:52,119 --> 00:47:53,244
They're pills!

777
00:47:53,412 --> 00:47:55,079
It's Ecstasy, bro!

778
00:48:07,634 --> 00:48:09,385
You heard about this on Craigslist?

779
00:48:09,553 --> 00:48:12,430
Craigslist, yeah. It's on the thing,
on the page, right there.

780
00:48:12,598 --> 00:48:14,807
Whoa, we are so fucked.

781
00:48:14,975 --> 00:48:17,268
Relax, man.
We need to tell Thomas.

782
00:48:17,436 --> 00:48:20,187
T-Rick's so burned out,
he probably forgot about it already.

783
00:48:20,355 --> 00:48:21,522
This is bad.

784
00:48:22,482 --> 00:48:25,735
Mom, Dad, it's me, Thomas.

785
00:48:25,903 --> 00:48:27,111
Um...

786
00:48:27,279 --> 00:48:29,864
I'm drunk. I mean, that's not an excuse.

787
00:48:30,032 --> 00:48:35,119
Hopefully we'll meet again,
so I can explain things.

788
00:48:35,787 --> 00:48:37,538
I don't really have an explanation...

789
00:48:37,706 --> 00:48:40,416
...other than fucking Costa
made me do it. So...

790
00:48:42,294 --> 00:48:43,961
- Fuck off!
- Dude, it's us.

791
00:48:44,129 --> 00:48:45,463
I know.

792
00:48:47,257 --> 00:48:49,717
What are you doing in here?
The whole party's outside.

793
00:48:49,885 --> 00:48:51,427
Have you seen my fucking house?

794
00:48:51,595 --> 00:48:54,138
We have a whole day
to fix this place up. It's all good.

795
00:48:54,306 --> 00:48:59,143
No, it's not all good, okay? I mean,
what about this? What if my parents see it?

796
00:48:59,311 --> 00:49:02,104
Nobody's gonna see this shit but us.
I promise.

797
00:49:03,982 --> 00:49:06,067
Where did all these people
even come from?

798
00:49:06,234 --> 00:49:07,902
You know a guy down there told me...

799
00:49:08,070 --> 00:49:11,072
...he found out about the party
on fucking Craigslist?

800
00:49:12,032 --> 00:49:14,325
My dad met my stepmom on Craigslist.

801
00:49:14,493 --> 00:49:16,661
So you put my address
on the fucking Internet?

802
00:49:16,828 --> 00:49:19,538
- Well, not just the Internet.
- Shut the fuck up, J. B!

803
00:49:19,706 --> 00:49:21,582
Wait, what the fuck is he talking about?

804
00:49:21,750 --> 00:49:25,795
I had Jesse Marco put out an e-mail blast
and I may have called a radio station or two.

805
00:49:25,963 --> 00:49:27,254
You motherfuckers!

806
00:49:27,422 --> 00:49:29,674
You were so nervous
about people not showing up.

807
00:49:29,841 --> 00:49:33,094
Dude, people are spilling shit,
breaking shit, probably stealing shit.

808
00:49:33,261 --> 00:49:34,929
It's out of control.

809
00:49:35,097 --> 00:49:38,182
I wasn't nervous. I wanted the party
to be big enough to be cool.

810
00:49:38,350 --> 00:49:41,686
- Dude, look, back in Queens...
- I'm fucking sick of hearing about Queens.

811
00:49:41,853 --> 00:49:44,522
We get it. Queens is awesome.
We're pussies. I don't fucking care.

812
00:49:44,690 --> 00:49:46,315
I'm doin' me

813
00:49:46,483 --> 00:49:50,319
I'm livin' life right now, man
And this what I'm gonna do

814
00:49:50,862 --> 00:49:52,738
Whatever happens, we can make this right.

815
00:49:52,906 --> 00:49:56,117
I'll fix this whole house myself if I have to.

816
00:49:56,284 --> 00:49:59,787
Your parents don't even come home
till Sunday. You just need to relax, man.

817
00:49:59,955 --> 00:50:02,999
- You want a massage, bro?
- No, no. Just, stop.

818
00:50:03,166 --> 00:50:05,126
This is my favorite song, guys.

819
00:50:05,293 --> 00:50:07,211
But my body

820
00:50:07,379 --> 00:50:09,088
My body's

821
00:50:09,256 --> 00:50:12,008
I can't believe, like,
you guys just did this to me.

822
00:50:12,175 --> 00:50:14,051
We did this for you.

823
00:50:15,178 --> 00:50:18,723
Look, man, I know you're not a drug guy,
and I respect that about you.

824
00:50:18,890 --> 00:50:21,392
- But right now, this is what you need.
- What is it?

825
00:50:21,560 --> 00:50:25,062
It's Ecstasy. It'll put the brakes
on your little freak-out. Just take it.

826
00:50:27,607 --> 00:50:30,568
All right. This won't totally,
like, fuck me up, will it?

827
00:50:30,736 --> 00:50:33,988
Of course it will, dude.
That's the whole point.

828
00:50:35,532 --> 00:50:36,824
Here.

829
00:50:37,909 --> 00:50:40,494
- Hey.
- You get half of one.

830
00:50:41,747 --> 00:50:44,248
Baby

831
00:50:44,458 --> 00:50:46,417
All right, just give me like 10 minutes.

832
00:50:47,794 --> 00:50:49,587
No fucking way, man!

833
00:50:50,005 --> 00:50:52,256
Ow! Get off me.
This is your night.

834
00:50:52,424 --> 00:50:56,761
Cut the music. Cut it.
How's everybody doing? It's your host, Costa.

835
00:50:56,928 --> 00:50:59,764
I'm gonna bring up my best friends,
Thomas and J.B.

836
00:50:59,931 --> 00:51:01,599
Get your asses up here right now.

837
00:51:01,767 --> 00:51:03,476
Come on, move your asses.

838
00:51:04,019 --> 00:51:05,770
Come on, J.B., move your fat ass.

839
00:51:05,937 --> 00:51:09,774
The reason you guys are here tonight
is because it's Thomas Kub's birthday.

840
00:51:09,941 --> 00:51:14,028
And we're gonna sing a little
"Happy Birthday" for him. One, two, three.

841
00:51:14,446 --> 00:51:18,908
Happy birthday to you

842
00:51:19,076 --> 00:51:23,788
Happy birthday to you

843
00:51:23,955 --> 00:51:29,251
Happy birthday dear Thomas

844
00:51:29,961 --> 00:51:33,631
Happy birthday to you

845
00:51:36,009 --> 00:51:38,886
Thanks, everybody, for coming.
Let's get the music rocking!

846
00:51:40,222 --> 00:51:41,305
Wait up. Wait, wait.

847
00:51:41,473 --> 00:51:46,143
Wait up, wait up. I wanted to do a birthday
song too, if I can, Thomas. Is that cool?

848
00:51:48,063 --> 00:51:49,605
It's all right with me, brother.

849
00:51:49,773 --> 00:51:53,651
Will you drop a beat
so I can do a birthday rap? Ahem.

850
00:51:59,407 --> 00:52:01,283
Yeah
Hey, Thomas

851
00:52:01,451 --> 00:52:05,412
Happy birthday
You can suck my dick if you thirsty

852
00:52:05,580 --> 00:52:09,500
I'm glad your folks are on vacation
I just raided the fridge

853
00:52:09,668 --> 00:52:11,335
And shit in the kitchen

854
00:52:11,503 --> 00:52:13,963
Jew Pesci, go back to New York

855
00:52:14,131 --> 00:52:16,841
You look like smorgasbord of dorks

856
00:52:17,008 --> 00:52:19,176
Yeah, and I bet you got baby dick

857
00:52:19,344 --> 00:52:21,846
The kind that got many AIDS and shit

858
00:52:22,013 --> 00:52:25,099
And J.B., what's up?
You wanna suck my dick

859
00:52:25,267 --> 00:52:28,185
In the back of your dad's truck
You fat fuck

860
00:52:28,353 --> 00:52:31,897
You tub of love
I'm gonna put you in the back of the truck

861
00:52:32,065 --> 00:52:34,441
And give you a back tug
Yeah

862
00:52:35,861 --> 00:52:37,027
That's a penis hand job

863
00:52:37,195 --> 00:52:40,531
You look like a little gremlin
And a teddy bear had a baby

864
00:52:40,740 --> 00:52:44,827
What? Fuck you guys then, man.
You all can suck my dick.

865
00:52:44,995 --> 00:52:46,287
Fuck off.

866
00:52:46,746 --> 00:52:48,664
Sorry about that, everybody,
that dude's whack.

867
00:52:48,832 --> 00:52:51,917
Get this shit rolling again.
Come on DJ Jesse Marco. Run it!

868
00:52:52,460 --> 00:52:54,503
Let's fucking lose it

869
00:52:54,671 --> 00:52:59,258
Get out of your mind

870
00:52:59,426 --> 00:53:02,261
Get out of your mind
Fuck that shit

871
00:53:02,429 --> 00:53:06,223
Fuck, yeah! What's up in this bitch?
Fuckers.

872
00:53:06,391 --> 00:53:08,893
Hey, baby, what's up?
Want some of this?

873
00:53:09,060 --> 00:53:12,104
Yeah!
The fuck you guys looking at?

874
00:53:12,898 --> 00:53:14,899
Whoa!

875
00:53:15,066 --> 00:53:17,484
- You got something to say?
- Buddy, what...? What the...

876
00:53:23,658 --> 00:53:26,243
Let me go! Goddamn it!

877
00:53:26,620 --> 00:53:28,245
Don't shut that...

878
00:53:28,413 --> 00:53:31,248
Scuffin' shell-toes
Is that nigga dead?

879
00:53:31,416 --> 00:53:33,459
Hey, have you seen Thomas?

880
00:53:33,627 --> 00:53:35,294
We're looking for him.

881
00:53:35,462 --> 00:53:38,672
Well, when you find him, can you tell him
I've got something for him?

882
00:53:39,424 --> 00:53:40,674
Jump in.

883
00:53:40,842 --> 00:53:43,135
You're breaking the rules, you know.

884
00:53:45,138 --> 00:53:46,764
Ew. Heh.

885
00:53:46,932 --> 00:53:49,308
Why won't you get in with me?

886
00:53:49,476 --> 00:53:53,062
It's just, like, I already went
swimming once against my will.

887
00:53:54,689 --> 00:53:56,357
Wetness.

888
00:53:56,733 --> 00:53:58,817
Ha, ha. Whoa.

889
00:53:58,985 --> 00:54:00,903
So, Thomas, are you having fun?

890
00:54:02,072 --> 00:54:03,280
- No.
- Not at all?

891
00:54:03,448 --> 00:54:06,116
- Yes.
- You look pretty fucked up.

892
00:54:06,284 --> 00:54:08,786
- I'm a little fucked up.
- But you look good.

893
00:54:08,954 --> 00:54:11,705
- Have you gotten lucky at all?
- I'm pretty lucky right now.

894
00:54:11,873 --> 00:54:13,207
Slow down, dude.

895
00:54:13,375 --> 00:54:15,209
Fine. Give me that.

896
00:54:15,377 --> 00:54:17,711
- Are you having fun at this party?
- So much fun.

897
00:54:17,879 --> 00:54:21,548
It's just that it's a small get-together.
It should be basically chill.

898
00:54:21,716 --> 00:54:24,885
Look how chill this is.
It's no big deal. I mean, there's two DJ's.

899
00:54:25,053 --> 00:54:28,222
That's not a big deal, right?
When do your parents get home?

900
00:54:28,390 --> 00:54:29,807
I don't know.

901
00:54:30,725 --> 00:54:32,643
Thomas? Thomas. Eyes up here.

902
00:54:32,811 --> 00:54:35,312
You have great knees.
Thanks.

903
00:54:35,480 --> 00:54:37,898
People don't tell you that enough, Kirby.

904
00:54:38,149 --> 00:54:39,525
J.B., get your fat ass up!

905
00:54:39,693 --> 00:54:42,861
There's a midget in the oven.
Let's go. Come on.

906
00:54:43,029 --> 00:54:44,697
What?
What? What did he say?

907
00:54:44,864 --> 00:54:46,156
I heard, "midget in oven."

908
00:54:49,619 --> 00:54:52,413
Move the fuck out of the way!

909
00:54:52,580 --> 00:54:54,039
Move the fuck out of the way!

910
00:54:54,207 --> 00:54:57,167
- I'm so sorry, sir. I'm so sor...
- Fuck!

911
00:54:57,335 --> 00:54:59,128
Hey, wrong guy. Wrong guy.

912
00:54:59,296 --> 00:55:02,381
- My God. Jesus Christ.
DAX: No.

913
00:55:02,549 --> 00:55:08,721
Motherfucker! Motherfuckers!
You fucking cunt!

914
00:55:11,683 --> 00:55:13,392
Why the balls, man?

915
00:55:13,560 --> 00:55:16,270
- Anywhere but the fucking balls.
- Think about it.

916
00:55:16,438 --> 00:55:19,440
Our balls are where his eyes are.

917
00:55:22,027 --> 00:55:23,902
Yo, yo, yo, hey!

918
00:55:24,070 --> 00:55:28,198
I just heard a rumor that all your balls
got attacked by a midget. Is it true?

919
00:55:28,366 --> 00:55:31,452
Please, please, just tell me it is.
I'm praying it fucking is.

920
00:55:31,619 --> 00:55:34,204
Dude, I can't believe I missed it.

921
00:55:35,790 --> 00:55:38,542
Look at your fucking pupils.

922
00:55:42,380 --> 00:55:44,214
- I love you guys.
- Ha, ha.

923
00:55:44,382 --> 00:55:45,799
No, seriously.

924
00:55:45,967 --> 00:55:48,719
Look, I realize I can be,
like, a huge dick sometimes...

925
00:55:48,887 --> 00:55:50,721
...and I'm really sorry for that.

926
00:55:50,889 --> 00:55:53,557
- It's okay.
- No, it's not.

927
00:55:54,809 --> 00:55:59,229
J.B., I'm sorry for buying you a bra
on your birthday. That wasn't cool.

928
00:55:59,397 --> 00:56:01,315
It wasn't cool, man.

929
00:56:01,483 --> 00:56:04,610
And I'm sorry for all the times
I called you Fat Fuck.

930
00:56:04,778 --> 00:56:06,278
Mm.

931
00:56:06,446 --> 00:56:09,073
- Chubby Bitch.
- Yeah.

932
00:56:09,240 --> 00:56:11,909
- Fudgy the Whale.
- Okay.

933
00:56:12,077 --> 00:56:14,661
I'm sorry for that time
at your brother's Bar Mitzvah...

934
00:56:14,829 --> 00:56:18,290
...where I told everyone you look like
Rosie O'Donnell, because you don't.

935
00:56:18,458 --> 00:56:20,542
- I don't.
- Hey, guys?

936
00:56:20,710 --> 00:56:22,419
- What?
- Um...

937
00:56:23,088 --> 00:56:25,214
I hooked up with Kirby.

938
00:56:26,841 --> 00:56:29,343
I'm, like, really into her.

939
00:56:31,930 --> 00:56:35,182
Okay, seriously, Thomas,
that's, you know, cool and all.

940
00:56:35,350 --> 00:56:38,268
But she's kind of always been around.

941
00:56:38,436 --> 00:56:40,979
It's like hooking up with J.B.

942
00:56:41,648 --> 00:56:43,107
But her tits are smaller.

943
00:56:43,274 --> 00:56:45,859
- Hey.
- I'm just saying.

944
00:56:46,027 --> 00:56:48,654
Kirby's sort of like one of us.

945
00:56:48,822 --> 00:56:51,782
You know, tonight's about the girls
we never had a shot at.

946
00:56:51,950 --> 00:56:55,577
Tonight's about changing the game.

947
00:59:10,880 --> 00:59:12,297
Heads will roll

948
00:59:12,465 --> 00:59:15,801
Heads will roll

949
00:59:17,178 --> 00:59:18,762
It's crazy out there.

950
00:59:18,930 --> 00:59:20,597
I haven't seen Tyler in an hour.

951
00:59:25,311 --> 00:59:27,354
We were slightly out of our league
on this mission.

952
00:59:32,902 --> 00:59:34,736
- Cool room.
- Thanks.

953
00:59:36,072 --> 00:59:37,698
It's a bit messy right now.

954
00:59:39,033 --> 00:59:40,867
Here, let me...

955
00:59:45,665 --> 00:59:47,874
So it's your birthday.

956
00:59:48,042 --> 00:59:51,044
Yeah, it's my birthday.

957
01:00:20,408 --> 01:00:21,950
Oh.

958
01:00:24,579 --> 01:00:26,997
I know where they build 'em

959
01:00:27,165 --> 01:00:30,626
I know where they're selling long

960
01:00:34,589 --> 01:00:38,759
Wider than the worst ones
Wider than the one I know

961
01:00:44,557 --> 01:00:50,479
Smoke machine begins to blow

962
01:00:54,734 --> 01:01:00,781
Lines of water on the floor

963
01:01:04,744 --> 01:01:10,749
I know you watch 'em
I know that you want no more

964
01:01:14,879 --> 01:01:21,051
Maybe in the factory
Maybe in the actual world

965
01:01:24,597 --> 01:01:26,723
Oh, my God. Thomas?

966
01:01:26,891 --> 01:01:28,266
Kirby.

967
01:01:28,434 --> 01:01:30,268
- Fuck off.
- I'm sorry. Hey, hey, Kirby...

968
01:01:30,436 --> 01:01:32,854
Thomas, what the fuck?

969
01:01:33,606 --> 01:01:35,357
Asshole.

970
01:01:39,445 --> 01:01:42,614
- Would you like a hand with that?
- How long have you been in there?

971
01:01:42,782 --> 01:01:44,449
- Fucking shit!
- What are you doing?

972
01:01:56,295 --> 01:01:57,337
Kirby!

973
01:01:58,131 --> 01:01:59,297
Kirby!

974
01:02:50,057 --> 01:02:52,225
Alexis, are you having a good time?

975
01:02:52,393 --> 01:02:53,685
No. I'm leaving.

976
01:03:11,329 --> 01:03:14,873
Hi. You've reached
the Kub residence. Please, leave a message.

977
01:03:15,041 --> 01:03:17,209
Thomas, it's me again.
I'm fucked, dude.

978
01:03:17,376 --> 01:03:21,671
I just got another call.
I'm sure the neighbors are exaggerating.

979
01:03:21,839 --> 01:03:24,382
- Please call me.
- Fuck.

980
01:03:30,640 --> 01:03:34,559
Pretty girls, sunshine in the air

981
01:03:34,811 --> 01:03:38,355
Perfume everywhere

982
01:03:38,689 --> 01:03:42,400
Bass to the floor, right now, what's up
A lime to a lemon

983
01:03:42,568 --> 01:03:46,780
Remind you of the sky when I'm fucking
And we on cloud nine for that minute

984
01:03:47,073 --> 01:03:48,990
Your style and your physique

985
01:03:49,200 --> 01:03:52,536
And I ain't tryin' to critique
But you deserve a good drink, so, what's up?

986
01:03:52,703 --> 01:03:54,704
What you sippin' on?
It's no problem

987
01:03:54,872 --> 01:03:57,916
Black and gold bottles
Like I'm pro-New Orleans

988
01:03:58,084 --> 01:04:03,129
But, shorty, I'm far from a saint
But I got two AmEx's that look the same way

989
01:04:03,297 --> 01:04:08,218
Wale, D.C., that's me, huh
My Prada say Prada and they Prada say Fila

990
01:04:08,386 --> 01:04:10,887
I ain't gotta tell you
They know about me, huh

991
01:04:11,055 --> 01:04:13,640
Come to D.C. And I can make you a believer

992
01:04:13,808 --> 01:04:16,560
See, baby, I'm a leader
Day away from a Libra

993
01:04:16,727 --> 01:04:19,229
I ain't tryin' to lead you wrong, sugar
I need you

994
01:04:19,397 --> 01:04:21,690
So would you please listen
To what I'm gonna need from you

995
01:04:21,858 --> 01:04:24,150
Live for tonight
Before tomorrow's amnesia

996
01:04:24,318 --> 01:04:29,030
Pretty girls
I ask them do they smoke

997
01:04:29,907 --> 01:04:31,908
Holy shit!

998
01:04:32,910 --> 01:04:34,536
It's fucking insane.

999
01:04:51,596 --> 01:04:55,599
Thomas, look at what we did. Epic.

1000
01:04:58,895 --> 01:05:01,438
Is this big enough to be cool?

1001
01:05:02,732 --> 01:05:04,149
Game changer.

1002
01:05:06,110 --> 01:05:07,777
Holy shit, it's the news.

1003
01:05:15,369 --> 01:05:16,453
Dude, that's Thomas!

1004
01:05:16,621 --> 01:05:19,623
Thomas! Thomas! Thomas!

1005
01:05:19,790 --> 01:05:21,708
Are you hearing this?

1006
01:05:21,876 --> 01:05:26,588
Thomas! Thomas! Thomas!

1007
01:05:26,756 --> 01:05:28,465
This is your fucking party, man.

1008
01:05:29,425 --> 01:05:31,635
You're right, dude. I needed this.

1009
01:05:35,806 --> 01:05:37,015
Fuck, yeah!

1010
01:05:45,066 --> 01:05:48,818
Look at me now, bitches!
My party is the shit!

1011
01:05:49,403 --> 01:05:52,030
My party is legendary!

1012
01:05:54,533 --> 01:05:56,993
Thomas! Thomas! Thomas!

1013
01:05:57,161 --> 01:05:58,828
- Watch this.
- Watch what?

1014
01:05:58,996 --> 01:06:02,999
Are you kidding me?
Hey, all you bitches. Aah!

1015
01:06:04,835 --> 01:06:07,253
Know me from the you know
Boss in my Hugo

1016
01:06:10,216 --> 01:06:12,676
Thomas, you crazy motherfucker!
I love you!

1017
01:06:16,055 --> 01:06:20,517
Jump! Jump! Jump!

1018
01:06:20,685 --> 01:06:23,436
Fuck that shit. I'm not jumping.
Fuck that.

1019
01:06:23,854 --> 01:06:26,231
Jump! Jump! Jump!

1020
01:06:29,485 --> 01:06:31,987
To my family members,
all my friends on Facebook...

1021
01:06:32,154 --> 01:06:33,697
- What?
- It's been a great ride.

1022
01:06:33,864 --> 01:06:36,950
- Costa, hold on to these.
- J.B., don't do it, man.

1023
01:06:37,118 --> 01:06:38,868
- You're way too fat.
- Shut up.

1024
01:06:45,501 --> 01:06:46,876
Yeah!

1025
01:06:54,844 --> 01:06:56,845
Oh, my God!

1026
01:06:59,724 --> 01:07:01,975
J.B., you all right, man?

1027
01:07:02,685 --> 01:07:05,061
- J.B., you all right?
- Ha-ha-ha!

1028
01:07:16,073 --> 01:07:17,157
This is Falcon One.

1029
01:07:17,324 --> 01:07:20,285
I was just attacked
by this really sexy woman.

1030
01:07:20,453 --> 01:07:23,079
We've lost all control.
The house was breached hours ago.

1031
01:07:23,247 --> 01:07:24,748
Chaos has spread to the streets.

1032
01:07:24,915 --> 01:07:27,667
And the police are returning in force.
We're clearly outnumbered.

1033
01:07:36,594 --> 01:07:37,719
God, help us.

1034
01:07:43,309 --> 01:07:44,893
Assholes!

1035
01:07:53,444 --> 01:07:57,363
Cops go home! Cops go home! Cops go home!

1036
01:07:57,531 --> 01:07:59,449
This is the police.

1037
01:07:59,617 --> 01:08:03,286
Disperse peacefully and immediately
or you will be subject to arrest.

1038
01:08:14,215 --> 01:08:15,965
In need of immediate assistance.

1039
01:08:18,052 --> 01:08:19,260
Drive, drive, drive!

1040
01:08:21,931 --> 01:08:24,224
Requesting backup, all units...

1041
01:08:41,992 --> 01:08:43,034
Holy shit!

1042
01:08:43,202 --> 01:08:45,120
I jumped off the house on purpose.

1043
01:08:48,999 --> 01:08:51,167
Chaos has broken out in the Southland...

1044
01:08:51,335 --> 01:08:55,880
...where this normally quiet residential
street has turned into anarchy.

1045
01:09:05,516 --> 01:09:08,852
I'm joined now by Captain Reesman
of the Police Department.

1046
01:09:09,019 --> 01:09:12,147
We'll have to let this thing burn out
before we even think about moving back in.

1047
01:10:01,906 --> 01:10:04,032
Good evening, uh, this is... This is Dax.

1048
01:10:07,953 --> 01:10:10,413
I'm inside the belly of the beast.

1049
01:10:10,873 --> 01:10:13,291
I don't have words
for some of the things I've seen.

1050
01:10:13,459 --> 01:10:17,212
Pfft. A lot of people don't know
this simple fact, but this is actually...

1051
01:10:17,379 --> 01:10:20,632
It's the first party
I've ever attended and you...

1052
01:10:20,799 --> 01:10:24,552
Perhaps tonight is just business as usual,
but something tells me, no, it's not.

1053
01:10:30,684 --> 01:10:32,769
Shit, that's my dad's car.
Shit, dude.

1054
01:10:34,188 --> 01:10:35,271
Oh, shit.

1055
01:10:41,862 --> 01:10:43,905
Oh, shit!

1056
01:10:55,417 --> 01:10:57,669
Are you kidding me?

1057
01:11:00,673 --> 01:11:02,924
- What are you doing?
- What?

1058
01:11:03,092 --> 01:11:04,717
Fuck your car!

1059
01:11:07,554 --> 01:11:08,680
Motherfuckers!

1060
01:11:10,474 --> 01:11:13,518
Oh, my God, Thomas, we're fucked.

1061
01:11:13,686 --> 01:11:15,645
I don't know how to fix this.

1062
01:11:16,897 --> 01:11:19,399
I don't know how to fix any of this shit.

1063
01:11:19,566 --> 01:11:23,695
I'm sorry, Thomas.
I just wanted to get some pussy.

1064
01:11:27,074 --> 01:11:30,368
And something's just happening right now.
I've heard a commotion.

1065
01:11:32,413 --> 01:11:33,871
Holy shit!

1066
01:11:37,751 --> 01:11:39,544
What the fuck is that?

1067
01:11:39,712 --> 01:11:41,045
Whoa!

1068
01:11:44,258 --> 01:11:45,425
Outside visual on subject with...

1069
01:11:45,592 --> 01:11:47,176
Everybody, back!

1070
01:11:50,347 --> 01:11:51,931
Fuck! You guys, come on!

1071
01:11:52,099 --> 01:11:54,559
- Come on, get the fuck out of here! Move!
- Come on!

1072
01:11:54,727 --> 01:11:57,353
Go! Shit!
Come on!

1073
01:11:57,563 --> 01:12:00,565
Whoa! What the fuck, dude! Get down!

1074
01:12:00,733 --> 01:12:02,692
- Holy shit! Look out.
- Shit! What the fuck?

1075
01:12:04,278 --> 01:12:08,072
Subject is armed and active.
Oh, my fucking God.

1076
01:12:08,240 --> 01:12:12,368
Police are on scene in riot gear.
SWAT officers are rushing forward.

1077
01:12:12,536 --> 01:12:14,620
All units hold for SWAT team arrival.

1078
01:12:17,916 --> 01:12:19,876
Fuck!
Holy shit, dude, it's T-Rick!

1079
01:12:20,044 --> 01:12:23,880
- What the fuck is he doing?
- Costa!

1080
01:12:24,048 --> 01:12:27,383
Give me back my fucking gnome!

1081
01:12:27,551 --> 01:12:30,803
- Give it to him. Where is it?
- It was full of Ecstasy. Everyone ate it!

1082
01:12:30,971 --> 01:12:33,848
Where the fuck is Costa?

1083
01:12:34,016 --> 01:12:35,850
Subject is advancing.

1084
01:12:39,772 --> 01:12:41,898
Whoa, shit!

1085
01:12:43,567 --> 01:12:44,609
This is the police...

1086
01:12:44,777 --> 01:12:46,486
Approach with extreme caution.

1087
01:12:46,653 --> 01:12:49,947
Put down your weapon
and put your hands in the air.

1088
01:12:50,115 --> 01:12:52,825
Get down! Show me your hands!
Put down your weapon!

1089
01:12:52,993 --> 01:12:55,203
Police are now firing rubber bullets.

1090
01:12:55,371 --> 01:12:56,788
Drop it now!
Back up, back up!

1091
01:12:56,955 --> 01:12:57,997
Get back!

1092
01:12:59,083 --> 01:13:00,792
Suspect is firing at officers.

1093
01:13:01,293 --> 01:13:04,045
- Fuck this.
- Where are you going? Get back here!

1094
01:13:04,213 --> 01:13:05,338
Dude, Thomas, no!

1095
01:13:05,506 --> 01:13:08,007
Look, T-Rick, we can fix this.
Okay, man?

1096
01:13:08,175 --> 01:13:09,217
Fuck you!

1097
01:13:09,385 --> 01:13:12,678
You burn me, I burn you!

1098
01:13:12,846 --> 01:13:14,514
Thomas, get back here, dude!

1099
01:13:14,681 --> 01:13:16,224
Costa, you motherfucker!

1100
01:13:16,392 --> 01:13:18,643
Put down your weapon.
Put your hands in the air.

1101
01:13:18,811 --> 01:13:19,936
- Go, go, go!
- Shit!

1102
01:13:20,104 --> 01:13:21,979
Put down your weapon.

1103
01:13:22,147 --> 01:13:23,981
Yeah. Now. Take the shot!

1104
01:13:24,149 --> 01:13:25,358
Get the fuck out of here!

1105
01:13:25,526 --> 01:13:27,026
Go!

1106
01:13:28,529 --> 01:13:29,987
Get back. Get back!

1107
01:13:30,697 --> 01:13:31,864
Fuck. Oh, my God.

1108
01:13:32,032 --> 01:13:33,699
Still active and on the move.

1109
01:13:35,869 --> 01:13:37,370
Heading toward residence.

1110
01:13:39,706 --> 01:13:41,541
Holy shit!

1111
01:13:44,211 --> 01:13:46,254
This is the police.

1112
01:13:47,131 --> 01:13:49,215
Disperse immediately.

1113
01:13:49,967 --> 01:13:51,050
Oh, my God.

1114
01:13:51,218 --> 01:13:53,886
Disperse immediately
or you will be subject to arrest.

1115
01:13:54,555 --> 01:13:56,222
This is the police.

1116
01:14:00,894 --> 01:14:03,396
- We gotta get out of here.
- I can't leave my house.

1117
01:14:03,564 --> 01:14:05,440
The house is gone, man.
It's fucking over.

1118
01:14:05,607 --> 01:14:08,359
- Where's Milo?
- This is the police.

1119
01:14:15,784 --> 01:14:17,910
Disperse immediately.

1120
01:14:22,875 --> 01:14:24,041
Go, go!

1121
01:14:25,127 --> 01:14:27,253
I hear him here.

1122
01:14:27,421 --> 01:14:30,506
What the fuck are you doing?
The dog's not gonna be in that drawer.

1123
01:14:30,674 --> 01:14:33,009
Here he is! I got him! Motherfuckers!

1124
01:14:33,177 --> 01:14:34,719
Come on, let's go. Move!

1125
01:14:42,269 --> 01:14:44,270
It's complete chaos out here.

1126
01:14:44,438 --> 01:14:48,357
Police are using flash-bang grenades
to try and disperse this crowd.

1127
01:14:48,525 --> 01:14:49,775
This is the police.

1128
01:14:49,943 --> 01:14:52,278
Disperse immediately.

1129
01:14:52,446 --> 01:14:55,948
If you do not disperse immediately,
you will be subject to arrest.

1130
01:14:57,784 --> 01:14:59,118
Go! Go!

1131
01:14:59,286 --> 01:15:02,747
Police are now mobilizing.
Fire helicopters have been brought in.

1132
01:15:02,915 --> 01:15:05,750
They're dropping water
to put this blaze out.

1133
01:15:15,302 --> 01:15:18,513
Scene in progress,
50 yards ahead of IC. Officers need assistance.

1134
01:15:18,680 --> 01:15:20,473
Holy shit!

1135
01:15:20,641 --> 01:15:23,100
Tyler, I need you! Pull it together!

1136
01:15:26,063 --> 01:15:28,147
Civilians 50 yards ahead on Dickens.

1137
01:15:30,317 --> 01:15:32,652
- Officers engaged with riot...
- What is going on?

1138
01:15:32,819 --> 01:15:35,029
- Stay down. Stay down.
- Fuck! Shit!

1139
01:15:36,865 --> 01:15:38,366
Milo!

1140
01:15:39,284 --> 01:15:40,993
- Dude, Milo!
- Hey, Oliver!

1141
01:15:41,161 --> 01:15:42,787
Great party, buddy.

1142
01:15:42,955 --> 01:15:44,664
You owe me a tree, you piece of shit.

1143
01:15:44,831 --> 01:15:49,210
All we're doing is trying to have a good time,
you cocksucking motherfucker!

1144
01:15:49,378 --> 01:15:52,630
You know where you're going?
You're going to jail, you motherfucker!

1145
01:15:52,798 --> 01:15:57,552
Yeah! That's my boys! Suck my dick, Robert!
Suck my fucking dick!

1146
01:16:03,183 --> 01:16:04,308
Fuck! Shit!

1147
01:16:04,476 --> 01:16:07,520
Black sedan. License plate...
We've got a hit-and-run.

1148
01:16:07,688 --> 01:16:10,982
Go, go, go!
Run! Run!

1149
01:16:11,149 --> 01:16:12,984
Unit 23, what's your status?

1150
01:16:17,781 --> 01:16:21,200
Skirmish line, be advised,
officer down, officer down.

1151
01:16:39,970 --> 01:16:44,015
He's home alone. He's been up
all night, so he's probably gonna crash soon.

1152
01:16:44,182 --> 01:16:47,893
We wait about an hour to make sure
he's asleep, then we make our move.

1153
01:16:48,061 --> 01:16:50,938
We go in the back, break Rob's door down,
and torch the house.

1154
01:16:51,106 --> 01:16:53,190
- Yeah.
- What the fuck are you talking about?

1155
01:16:53,358 --> 01:16:56,527
The guy has a wife and a baby.
You're not gonna burn his house down.

1156
01:16:56,695 --> 01:16:58,821
He called the cops on us.
He ruined everything.

1157
01:16:58,989 --> 01:17:03,367
It's 6 in the morning, man.
Let it go. It's over.

1158
01:17:04,036 --> 01:17:05,828
Just go home.

1159
01:17:12,252 --> 01:17:13,919
What about our money?

1160
01:17:15,422 --> 01:17:19,216
The house is trashed.
You're the worst security ever.

1161
01:17:30,562 --> 01:17:32,229
You guys should go home too.

1162
01:17:34,483 --> 01:17:36,442
You gonna be okay, man?

1163
01:17:36,943 --> 01:17:39,779
Yeah, I'm just gonna hang here
with Milo for a bit.

1164
01:17:45,452 --> 01:17:46,452
All right.

1165
01:17:47,204 --> 01:17:49,121
I'm gonna go home...

1166
01:17:50,082 --> 01:17:53,876
...have a good cry,
and start calling some lawyers.

1167
01:17:55,629 --> 01:17:58,464
Thomas, whatever happens, man...

1168
01:17:59,549 --> 01:18:02,426
...that was one fucking hell of a night.

1169
01:18:02,928 --> 01:18:05,304
Come on, J.B., let's bounce.

1170
01:18:29,830 --> 01:18:32,081
You can go too, Dax.

1171
01:18:35,127 --> 01:18:36,919
Thanks, Thomas.

1172
01:18:37,295 --> 01:18:39,714
I had a really fun time.

1173
01:18:41,675 --> 01:18:43,592
You'll be all right.

1174
01:18:59,401 --> 01:19:01,444
Kevin and Bean
from the world-famous KROQ.

1175
01:19:01,611 --> 01:19:05,531
Can we talk about this insanity
in Pasadena last night?

1176
01:19:05,699 --> 01:19:07,533
It looked like the greatest party ever.

1177
01:19:07,701 --> 01:19:09,535
Big Boy's neighborhood, beautiful day.

1178
01:19:09,703 --> 01:19:12,121
It is going down.
I don't know if you seen the news.

1179
01:19:12,289 --> 01:19:16,375
But some cats had a party in Pasadena
and took this thing to the whole next level.

1180
01:19:16,543 --> 01:19:20,546
I'm talking about, they trashed the
neighborhood. They trashed the house.

1181
01:19:20,714 --> 01:19:22,757
We heard that Kanye
made an appearance there.

1182
01:19:22,924 --> 01:19:26,427
Yeah, so if you were there at the party
in Pasadena last night, hit us up...

1183
01:19:26,595 --> 01:19:30,306
...because we're gonna be talking about it
all morning long in the neighborhood.

1184
01:19:34,603 --> 01:19:38,105
- I really am sorry.
- You said that already.

1185
01:19:40,859 --> 01:19:44,904
Do you have any idea how much
all this is gonna cost, Thomas?

1186
01:19:47,365 --> 01:19:50,034
Your college fund is gone,
I can tell you that.

1187
01:19:51,995 --> 01:19:54,580
- Yeah. Dad, I'm sorry.
- You had so much going for you...

1188
01:19:54,748 --> 01:19:59,084
...and you just pissed it all away
for one night?

1189
01:20:03,256 --> 01:20:05,591
I just didn't think you had it in you.

1190
01:20:08,303 --> 01:20:11,847
Well, I know. I'm sorry I let you down.

1191
01:20:12,098 --> 01:20:13,641
No.

1192
01:20:13,934 --> 01:20:19,939
I literally didn't think
that you had this in you.

1193
01:20:23,443 --> 01:20:26,946
So, uh, how many people were here?

1194
01:20:27,614 --> 01:20:29,073
Uh...

1195
01:20:30,659 --> 01:20:32,159
Fifteen hundred.

1196
01:20:33,537 --> 01:20:35,704
Couple thousand, maybe.

1197
01:20:36,456 --> 01:20:37,790
Wow.

1198
01:20:39,292 --> 01:20:41,252
You should've seen it.

1199
01:20:44,548 --> 01:20:46,423
It was awesome.

1200
01:20:48,969 --> 01:20:51,971
Well, you're still fucked, Thomas.

1201
01:21:06,236 --> 01:21:07,695
It's the motherfucking D-O-double-G

1202
01:21:07,863 --> 01:21:09,738
Snoop Dogg

1203
01:21:10,824 --> 01:21:13,325
You know I'm mobbin' with the D-R-E

1204
01:21:13,493 --> 01:21:15,452
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know who's back...

1205
01:21:16,872 --> 01:21:18,914
Well, at least the van
looks gangster now.

1206
01:21:19,082 --> 01:21:22,459
Dude, don't even start, okay?
My dad's making me drive it as punishment.

1207
01:21:22,627 --> 01:21:24,336
That sucks.

1208
01:21:24,504 --> 01:21:27,673
Yeah, and I'm being brought up on
like six different charges.

1209
01:21:27,841 --> 01:21:29,967
My mom hasn't stopped crying.

1210
01:21:30,135 --> 01:21:32,511
We're living at a Courtyard Marriott
right now.

1211
01:21:32,679 --> 01:21:34,847
I'm basically on house arrest
until my hearing.

1212
01:21:35,015 --> 01:21:36,724
I'm not supposed to talk to you guys.

1213
01:21:36,892 --> 01:21:40,352
My parents are convinced this is totally
gonna be fucking my college plans.

1214
01:21:40,520 --> 01:21:42,730
Your grades are fucking up
your college plans.

1215
01:21:42,898 --> 01:21:45,900
My dad got me a lawyer.
Even that Jew thinks we're fucked.

1216
01:21:46,067 --> 01:21:48,861
- Thinks we could actually do time for this.
- Jesus.

1217
01:21:49,029 --> 01:21:51,280
What about you, Dax?
What did your parents say?

1218
01:21:51,448 --> 01:21:54,033
Oh, I live alone, actually.

1219
01:21:55,285 --> 01:21:57,786
You're really starting
to fucking scare me.

1220
01:21:59,873 --> 01:22:01,874
Yo, what up, Kub?

1221
01:22:04,544 --> 01:22:06,211
What's going on, man?

1222
01:22:06,379 --> 01:22:08,005
That's him.

1223
01:22:11,885 --> 01:22:12,968
Hey, Costa.

1224
01:22:13,136 --> 01:22:15,554
- Hi, Thomas.
- Thank you.

1225
01:22:15,722 --> 01:22:17,556
Thank you.

1226
01:22:19,601 --> 01:22:22,728
Yo, you guys, Thomas.
That party was dope.

1227
01:22:22,896 --> 01:22:24,897
Thank you, man.
No, thank you, man.

1228
01:22:25,065 --> 01:22:26,565
You guys rock.

1229
01:22:31,905 --> 01:22:32,988
Thank you.

1230
01:22:34,616 --> 01:22:36,158
J. B!

1231
01:22:37,160 --> 01:22:40,329
Thomas! Thomas! Thomas!

1232
01:22:58,098 --> 01:22:59,640
Kirby, wait.

1233
01:23:00,976 --> 01:23:02,434
Kirby.

1234
01:23:03,269 --> 01:23:06,355
- Hey.
- Hey, look, I just wanted to talk to you.

1235
01:23:06,523 --> 01:23:10,192
- There's really nothing to talk about.
- Wait. Please, can I just explain?

1236
01:23:10,568 --> 01:23:11,944
It's not that complicated.

1237
01:23:12,445 --> 01:23:16,573
What you did was really not cool.

1238
01:23:17,867 --> 01:23:19,702
It really hurt me.

1239
01:23:20,078 --> 01:23:22,079
Kirby, I'm really sorry about
what happened.

1240
01:23:22,539 --> 01:23:24,748
I didn't know how to handle it.

1241
01:23:26,376 --> 01:23:29,461
But I think I do now
and that's why I'm here.

1242
01:23:32,215 --> 01:23:35,467
My life right now, it's totally ruined.

1243
01:23:35,635 --> 01:23:39,096
Okay? I practically burned down
my whole neighborhood.

1244
01:23:39,723 --> 01:23:43,142
Probably bankrupt my parents.
I'll be in debt until I die.

1245
01:23:43,309 --> 01:23:46,478
But the only thing that I care about
fixing right now is this.

1246
01:23:46,646 --> 01:23:47,938
So, I'm sorry.

1247
01:23:49,524 --> 01:23:52,067
If you're still mad, I get it...

1248
01:23:52,277 --> 01:23:56,071
...but if you are talking to me
by my next birthday...

1249
01:23:56,239 --> 01:23:59,158
...I'd really like to spend it with just you.

1250
01:24:07,792 --> 01:24:09,293
Oh, you're...

1251
01:24:16,342 --> 01:24:18,427
So we're cool again?

1252
01:24:18,595 --> 01:24:20,971
I never said you were cool.

1253
01:24:34,027 --> 01:24:37,654
So you know this high school party
in Pasadena that turned into a riot, right?

1254
01:24:37,822 --> 01:24:40,991
The kid actually burned his parents'
house down. Can you imagi...?

1255
01:24:41,159 --> 01:24:43,786
Do you know how many chores
it's gonna take to make up for...

1256
01:24:45,455 --> 01:24:48,874
He'll be taking the trash out
nine times a day for the rest of his life.

1257
01:24:49,042 --> 01:24:53,295
The person who caused
the early morning fire and explosion here...

1258
01:24:53,463 --> 01:24:57,216
...has survived his injuries...
Costa!

1259
01:24:57,383 --> 01:25:00,177
We moved to a place like Pasadena
to avoid stuff like this.

1260
01:25:00,345 --> 01:25:03,430
Some asshole puked all over
my front door.

1261
01:25:03,598 --> 01:25:07,684
Do these kids even have parents?
It's ridiculous, right?

1262
01:25:08,895 --> 01:25:11,146
Have you seen the footage?
Let me tell you.

1263
01:25:11,314 --> 01:25:15,526
I haven't seen that many teenage boobs
since R. Kelly's birthday party.

1264
01:26:03,074 --> 01:26:08,579
Joining us now live is one Pasadena teen
who's recently drawn a lot of notice...

1265
01:26:08,746 --> 01:26:10,622
...for throwing what people
are calling...

1266
01:26:10,790 --> 01:26:13,876
...possibly the most epic
high-school party of all time.

1267
01:26:14,043 --> 01:26:17,921
Costa, before we begin, is there anything
that you would like to say to the viewers?

1268
01:26:18,089 --> 01:26:19,256
In fact, I would.

1269
01:26:19,424 --> 01:26:22,551
You said it was perhaps
the most epic party of all time.

1270
01:26:22,719 --> 01:26:25,053
It was the most epic party of all time.

1271
01:26:25,221 --> 01:26:28,724
Okay. I was thinking more along
the lines of an apology.

1272
01:26:28,892 --> 01:26:30,309
Would you like to apologize?

1273
01:26:30,476 --> 01:26:33,478
I got a better idea.
How about I invite you to my next party?

1274
01:26:33,980 --> 01:26:35,981
- What?
- Yeah, you heard me, sugar-tits.

1275
01:26:36,149 --> 01:26:37,983
Just make sure
you wear something tight.