∩╗┐1 00: 00: 27,338 -> 00: 00: 31,630 NETFLIX PRESENTS
Just a few more hours
until now everyone has been waiting,
lying in a lounge chair or on the grass,
eyes are fixed on the sky.
Tonight, a rare phenomenon will occur.
Total lunar eclipse.
And of course it's rare.
The next one is expected in 2033,
and one has never been seen in France since 1998.
This is the first appearance in the 21st century.
Like that fate, tonight's weather conditions are ideal.
Many viewers will try to capture this moment.
To do that, sophisticated equipment is not needed.
A regular camera or smartphone will do the trick.
A wise word: Don't believe superstition.
Eclipses are not without risks.
In fact, the legend has it that during the lunar eclipse
extraordinary things can happen.
At the right time the moon is completely hidden,
time is said to be silent,
and your deepest sin is swept away...
Your soul is cursed to be trapped in limbo for the rest of eternity.
Only a legend, of course, but--
Enough is enough!
You look charming.
Thank you.
How did you come back?
Oh, no, not the bus. I think I will walk again because I don't live far away.
Oh, are you staying?
His condition is perfect. Not cloud ªª
No way!
Of course not!
I'll call you back.
Will you come out like that?
Yes why?
- Where did you go tonight? - I told you, Zo├⌐ party.
- I don't believe you. - Don't believe me then.
What is this?
- Are you looking for my bag? - Not.
- I can't believe you checked my bag! - Continue? What is this?
Condoms. It is written in the box.
Margot...
They are not mine.
- Why are they in your bag? - Zo├⌐ asked me to look after them.
Is that so? And why can't Zo├⌐ take care of themselves?
Because his mother is crazy. He checks the items.
He must make an appointment with you.
- Don't call again! - I'm sure they are still awake.
He tells you that he will go to put him to sleep.
Don't be silly. You will wake them up.
- falling asleep? - I can't hear anything.
Hello?
What did I do?
Hold the cellphone, ma'am.
Hold that? What do you mean?
- Like this? - Precisely.
You have to put it on the bed.
It takes time, Charlotte. They are children, you know.
Yes I know. They are mine, you know.
Mother, it's not too late, please.
Yes, honey, I will do it now.
Tell your wife, I'm raising kids without her.
- He must pay attention to his tone of voice. - Yes, I can hear you, Grandma.
Okay, my dear. Good night!
- Good evening, Father and Mother. - Good night!
Good night dear.
Good evening mom.
Wait a minute. Do you go through the bag?
Yes.
Are you looking for the bag?
Yes... but that's not the point...
- Yes it is. - Vincent!
Our daughter is refusing parent structure.
Yes, but that's normal.
But he is 17 years old, and he is lucky enough to have parents who are both doctors. We have to help him.
Listening. I a gree with you.
He needs advice from his mother, not from a psychiatrist.
Is this always high?
How are you?
I'm fine.
- Is Ben here? - No, not yet.
- Have you met him? - Not.
- Tiramisu. - Yes, as usual.
Good, because Vincent's presence is creative again. Foie gras in milk...
In milk?
Hi friend.
Oh, hi!
Welcome.
Do you make foie gras in milk?
This is a surprise.
You know I'm allergic to lactose.
But don't foie gras?
Wait.
Answer this.
Dispatchers need drivers. But I'm on holiday this weekend.
So don't answer. We have a plan.
Yes...
Dinner at my mother's house.
- I'm not kidding. - I know.
- I'm thinking of another plan. - Oh, yes?
Show me wine. The label looks cheap, right?
No! It's from the wine shop opposite the salon.
That's biodynamic. Apparently, this is amazing.
For 25 euros, I have to hope so!
- It only needs degassing. - What?
Shaking off the gas.
The wine is not expensive, the gas.
- Yeah right. - What are you doing?
- Remove price tags. - For 25 euros, you can leave it!
Better yet, put it on your neck, look. Like this.
- "Hello good afternoon!" - Honey...
Stop it.
This elevator takes forever. Let's go up the stairs.
- But here! - Let's race, the first one up!
Oh yeah.
So what are you thinking about?
Well, it's white.
And?
I can't digest sulfite.
- They gave me... - What?
Heartburn.
Doing it?
This is a good Muscadet.
I strongly agree.
- Are you okay? You look a little tired. - Yes, I know.
Will you follow me?
- What should we start? - This is a surprise.
This is the surprise. Ben's new girl.
- How are you? - Good, yourself?
No.
- Where is Thomas? - On its way.
I won.
I'll beat you on the way down.
Hi you.
Okay, friends...
- OK. - How are you?
- Hey
- Is he here? - No, he hasn't arrived yet.
And no, I haven't met him. Here, give me your jacket.
Good...
Do you know, dating girlfriends?
- No, we think you did it. - You look great!
- This will be a surprise. - Thank you.
- What? - This is a surprise.
I like new colors.
- Do you think so? Thank you. - I like it.
Here.
- Thank you. - Sure.
- Yes, you see it. - Hi!
- Hi how are you? - Good and you?
- Hi. - Hi.
- here. That's biodynamic. - Is it true?
What does it mean?
- That means it's expensive. Look. - Baby!
- 25,90 a bottle, look! - No, stop it!
- It's better. - How are you?
- Have some Muscadet. - This is good.
That's good, but it makes me heartburn.
Can I help you?
No, he will scold you. This is a surprise.
- Ah, surprise! - Yes.
He cooks foie gras in milk.
This is my birthday cooking class gift.
Secret starters and main dishes.
- This is a surprise. - It smells good.
What's wrong?
You don't have to share your gift.
That's for you.
But this is your favorite dish, with a touch.
- Are you okay? You look a little tired. - Yes, it seems like that.
Stop by the salon. My boss is on vacation, I will give you a free face.
- I really want to, but it's Saturday for kids. - Come on, my mom can take care of them.
No. You go.
me?
My wife doesn't rub your bikini line!
Ah no. Marco lit his chest.
- What? - Do you dry your chest?
That's great.
- And you leave it? - I have no choice!
And he uses moisturizers.
Why do you tell everyone?
Wait, we have known each other for 35 years,
and we just found out you are drying your chest?
- And use a moisturizer. - Must be very soft.
No, I'm not waxed. I shave occasionally, that's all.
Moisturizers are for generations from my father's side.
Very dry skin.
He's dry!
- Many men use moisturizers. - Nothing wrong with that.
That's not funny!
Many men do that, don't they?
- How do you think the date Ben looks? - Don't know, but calm down.
This is the first girl since the divorce. Don't scare him.
Sufficient pistachios. There is a lot of food. You will be full.
- I can see it with older women. - Really, it's his.
- Like MIFL, but even older. - This is MILF.
- That's what I said. - You say MIFL.
What is that?
MILF? Much older than you.
Good.
This wine has a strange taste. Almost like Coke.
Damn, we don't eliminate it!
I think "throw it away."
Yes?
- 28A23. - Ben is that?
I have given it to you many times. See you soon.
Ben?
They are here.
- Hi. - But...
Where...
What?
Are you alone?
Oh that...
Stomach flu.
- Oh no! - So he didn't come?
Not with stomach flu.
- There is no MILF. - Too bad.
- That means more food for us. - Vincent!
This happened.
So I have to stay or...
- Of course, come in! - Sorry, come on in.
Sorry.
Here, Vincent.
- What happened? - She is sick.
- Do you fight? - Not.
I hope this is not biodynamic.
They fight.
No, we don't!
I will take it.
Marie, what's on the menu?
Don't worry, you won't be disappointed.
How old are you saying to him?
- I don't. - He didn't do it.
Guys, we agree. There are no jokes about Ben's new boyfriend.
It's okay. He is not here.
I'm here. What is the joke?
We wonder what it looks like. High short...
- Brown hair, blonde... - Silver gray...
Silver gray? Do you see me with an old woman?
Not necessarily. But you like women who are a little...
What little?
Silver gray.
- No. - Don't deny it.
How old is your ex, Catherine?
Don't say "is." He is not dead yet.
- He can. - Stop teasing her.
Your turn, my arm hurts.
Okay, so now you make a joke about former Ben?
No, that's not it...
Actually, he deserves it.
- Try pistachios in olives. - Pistasi--
Stop eating! I've made a lot of food. You will be full. It is not funny.
What did you make?
This is a surprise.
Ever wondered why you like old women?
I don't like old women!
Many older women like younger men. Like Madonna.
That's right. Maybe it's him.
- Who? - The date Ben can become Madonna.
Not possible.
I can't see Madonna has stomach pain.
Why not?
- Come to smoke? - I do not smoke.
Is that so? Come on.
I can imagine you guys with stomach flu, but not Madonna.
Thank you. Charming.
This wine hurts. It's better.
So who is this girl?
Is this serious?
I don't know.
- What do you mean you don't know? - Maybe.
- So who is this girl? - Do we know him?
No.
- Are you in love? - I do not know.
You are!
- Look at him! - How can I know?
I know.
If you call for more than 30 minutes a day, you fall in love.
And on the day you stop calling, you're married.
- Yes. - That is not true.
What's funny?
None.
Talk to girl.
Talk to girl?
- Am I disturbing? - No, of course not.
Will you taste this wine?
Maybe we shake it too often.
So when did we meet him?
Another time. I will be back.
- So? - I am not sure.
- Where did he go? - Stomach flu.
That's very good.
- What did he do? - Did you wash your hands?
- picture time. - Oh, no, Ben, there's no picture.
Yes!
I bought this gadget.
You have lots of pictures.
Especially since third grade. This is probably our only eclipse photo.
She's right. Plus, I think it's very beautiful.
I have never seen it before.
Strange things can happen during an eclipse.
Are you really looking for in all photos?
Yes. I even made a hodge-podge.
What is it?
- A "hodge-podge"? - Yes
Does he say "hodge-podge"?
Do people still say that?
The last time we said "later," we forgot.
- Come on! - It takes three seconds.
You're right. Last time, we did not take one.
Come on!
- One... - We did it, but in an instant.
Two...
And...
Ah! Kitchen!
- Very late! - Not!
The starter is hot, man. Stop it.
No!
Yes!
We will accept it later.
I don't see how easy it is to sell breast implants rather than shoes.
There are various shapes and sizes...
Some women want round ones, some pear-shaped.
Flat-as-a-pancake...
A liar!
So a man wants size 11.
But you only have ten in stock.
- Just try it. - Do you manage?
Depends. Sometimes you can give it a little so┬áit gliding stocking.
Or if it's too big, you give it to him a pair of thick socks.
I have seen people limping out the door.
You lie to people?
I see something funny.
Do you sell implants in pairs?
I bought it in pairs, but I didn't sell it with a partner.
- I see something funny. - Did you buy it in pairs?
Me too, I saw something funny.
Yes, but there are people who work...
Wait a minute, Ben has a funny story.
This old man has an attack on the bus. He hit the deck.
They tried to save him, but he was dead.
I hope the ending is funny.
This. And because...
They try to revive him, but they can't.
What does that sound?
Electrocardiograph.
- Yes, electrocardiogram... - Not "gram," "graph."
Whatever. It only sounds continuously.
- Not a good sign. - Not.
And then, suddenly, "Beeping, beeping, beeping."
Everyone is relieved. The wife stops crying.
But no.
This is a parent's phone, receives a text message.
They start hoping. They massage the heart again.
The wife starts crying again.
And...
Meanwhile, a beep continues.
The wife is weird.
At every beep he thinks he's still alive, so he took the cellphone to turn it off.
And he saw it.
And then... kaboom!
Kaboom?
- Continue. - He reads the text.
He saw what he received.
She realizes that her husband has a deposit who sprayed it.
Curly text messages.
- Don't know what that is. - Don't deny, you sent me a lot.
Shut up!
And the old woman becomes a widow and two at a time.
Is that it?
Yes.
It's sickening.
You did say that it would happen funny story.
Yes, but... isn't that funny?
Wait, the phone isn't locked?
I don't think so.
How stupid can you be?
Why?
You must be stupid not to lock your phone, especially if you cheat.
Well, that's convincing. You lock you up, don't you?
Of course I do...
Everyone does it. No?
No, not everyone.
Men on the bus don't.
- No, he certainly isn't. - That's why he's stupid.
I don't lock mine.
- Neither do I. - You do not?
No, I don't. We are a "no key" pair.
- We don't lock us. - I can see it.
So... what about oysters?
Not bad.
- They are warm. That's unusual. - Less cold.
- Is there still slippery oil in Brittany? - For God's sake, it's squid ink.
- I think you like oysters. - Yes, but they gave me canker sores.
They're oysters!
Why don't you say that?
- I like capers. - Well, next time I'm just going to do a caper.
- Capers au gratin. - Stop it.
You only cook things that I can't eat.
You can't eat anything.
What do you eat?
I eat everything.
At home, my mother cooks. I eat everything.
Yes, he eats everything you make.
Do you like water?
Water, of course.
I don't like it, but I can drink it.
The cellphone has become a couple's black box, isn't that right?
Why did you say that?
I'm thinking of Ben's story.
Imagine the amount of divorce
if everyone stalks through their partner's phone.
If you have nothing to hide...
Go now, let's see yours.
What?
Your phone. Show me.
But it's personal.
Make your mind up. You just said no problem if you don't hide anything.
Good.
But if I show mine, you show me yours.
Look, their hands are trembling.
What?
So, L├⌐a, can Thomas see through your cellphone?
I don't even lock mine.
Yes, and I'm not nosy.
And you? Will you show you to Vincent?
I don't want to know what is on his cellphone. I do not care.
You don't care?
No, I don't.
But if you want to see mine, it doesn't matter.
Only photos of fake and fat liposuction.
Wow!
- It's just work. - Show me.
That's a secret.
- Come on, he saw, show me! - This is medical privacy.
He said, "Medical privacy."
Let's play the game.
- Game? - Because we don't hide anything,
we can put all our phones on the table,
and anything received tonight,
e-mail, text, calls...
all things are social networks...
We saw everything together and read everything aloud.
This will be very fun.
Fun? I doubt that. Not pleasant at all.
She's right, it sounds fun to me. I'm in
Thank you.
There we go.
- Come on! - Come on!
Ben?
Stop with games. The last time we played Trivial Pursuit, we fought.
Seriously, this will be fun.
- Yes! - No, it won't be fun at all.
Why are you so stubborn?
No!
Yes.
Should I consider you hiding something?
ME...
I'm really serious.
Good.
- You don't need to do it. - This is it.
Thank you.
After we have enough, we can stop.
That's fun. Like the modern version
"Truth or Courage" when we are young.
Come on, honey.
- Honey? - Yes!
Damn, we have to be an old couple if you say honey!
- If that makes you happy. - Yes, right.
If you're happy, I'm happy.
Personally, I think it's pretty tacky.
Why?
This is a dinner party.
Is that why you always put you down?
I see.
Very good.
Watching.
Face it now.
I like it!
Me too.
- Margot! - Hi, Margot.
- Well, I'm leaving. - You will be cold like that.
I keep telling him.
Can I talk to you?
- He's grown up! - I am here.
Actually, can you come with me, please?
I'll be back soon.
- Let's go. - His daughter gave the order.
He made it wrap around his finger.
What's wrong?
Can you give me money for tonight?
- Can't you ask me there? - You know I hate asking in front of you.
- Ben, give me your plate. - No, wait.
- But you like these items. - Marie!
What's with this oyster?
The best is yet to come.
- P├ót├⌐ in milk. - No, this is foie gras.
Stop! Someone gets a message!
That's yours.
"I want your body."
Who is this?
I don't know!
I know this is a bad idea. We must stop now.
- Who is this? - Leave!
The number is not stored on my cellphone. That's a mistake.
This is the same number!
- No. - Answer this!
I don't know who that is!
Answer and you will know.
Place it on the speakerphone.
Hello who is this?
Hey who is this?
Hello? Answer, because... I don't care, I hang up.
No, you don't want to!
Wait a minute.
I hear breath. There is someone there.
Hey, we can hear you.
Answer, or else!
Hey!
What is this?
Answer, damn it.
Hey!
Thomas, baby...
She's like a donkey.
You are like...
That will teach him to make fun of my oyster.
Oh, Thomas, I want to see you naked, is really naked!
I know that he is.
I know that.
He and his stupid joke!
No, but... This game is not good.
I said that.
Can I return my cellphone? I have to go.
Of course. Thank you, dear.
You can say goodbye.
Sure. Bye
Wow...
He isn't always like this.
No... he's fine tonight.
Don't worry, you will know what to do.
- "You will know what to do?" - Yes.
Are you pregnant?
No, but we are working on it.
Active enough.
Very active.
I think children "comfort choices."
Children, comfortable?
I don't think you realize What are you saying.
I do it. Socially, this is very comfortable.
You are married, you have children. You match the print.
There are no questions asked.
I don't want a child just to adjust the prints.
I have my reason.
Name one.
I don't know, there are many of them.
For couples, this is an achievement.
Sorry to tell you this, but it's even worse.
That means both of you can be really happy because your happiness depends on others.
That's rude, Ben.
Yes, I'm rude.
I want my happiness to depend on me.
There.
That's selfish, I know. Then I will die selfishly.
And alone.
I know the day he told me I will be a father, I will...
I will cry.
My love!
Wait until he is 17 years old and talk back to you.
That's when you will cry.
Not possible.
This is my sister. What am I doing?
Answer this!
This is the essence of the game.
Place it on the speakerphone.
You use cellphone speakers!
- He is very sick! - Ben!
On cellphone speakers? Turn it off, please.
- I can't. - Why not?
We are playing a game.
- Hello, Laurence. - Hi, Laurence.
Hello everyone.
Forget it, I'll call you tomorrow.
If it's about work in Nantes, tell your friends that I'm not interested.
We will talk about it tomorrow. Bye
Damn, I'm screwing up.
- We know it. - Sorry.
What is this work in Nantes?
Some friends told Laurence about teaching jobs in private schools.
Why don't you want it?
Far away.
This is not Shanghai!
I want to live in the sea.
Is Nantes by the sea?
Yes, more or less.
Do you want me to move away?
No!
- Yes! - Oh, pumpkin.
Thank you for your attention, but I have sent my CV to many places.
Something will appear.
They can't fire you like that. If you sue them, you will win.
They did not fire me.
They did not renew my contract. Nuance.
Do they give you a reason?
I think they want a new sports teacher.
They want someone younger, I think.
It's okay. I will find out... without having to go to Nantes.
I will find another one.
Wait, they're not finished yet.
Yes, we are!
But you haven't even started yet.
That's amazing. Thank you.
- Do you need help? - No, I'm fine.
Are you okay?
Yes.
You are drunk!
I'm not drunk!
This is pretty tense between you two.
Did something happen?
Yes, 15 years married.
We can't talk to each other without fighting.
How do you do it?
What do you do?
Together.
Please try.
- No. - Continue, taste.
- I can't, there's milk in it. - I made yours without milk. Feel it.
- I will have one bite. - Continue.
- It's hot! - No, that's not it.
Here.
- It's hot! - Yes, but good.
- This. Do you add capers? - Not.
You have to.
Good...
Seriously, you and Marie...
what's the secret?
I play it with my ears.
And sometimes I don't.
Give me that dish.
- What is this? - Broccoli castle.
This is it!
- What is that? - Foie gras in milk.
Don't start first. The side dish is not ready.
This is mine!
This is my father.
Hi Daddy.
How are you dear?
Good. We have dinner with friends.
I will be fast. I just talked to Weiss. He can operate for you next month.
I will send the telephone number.
Thank you, dad.
- Kiss me for me? - Yes.
- See you dear. - Goodbye.
What's wrong?
What is this operation?
There is nothing serious.
This is mammoplasty augmentation.
I experienced my breasts.
I need wine.
you? Breast work?
Yes I am.
Why? You are a psychiatrist.
Then?
She's right.
Therapists don't get breast jobs.
Yes, this is strange.
What did they do?
None.
Nothing!
Why not, if I want to?
That's the problem.
You shouldn't want it.
You are a psychiatrist!
Yes, as a psychiatrist, you must accept your body, right?
Exactly.
A woman who does her breasts is done does not accept herself?
No.
Listen, I accept my whole body, except my breasts.
Why didn't Vincent do the surgery?
I'm sure you have to pay someone else.
Because Father wants the best for his precious little girl.
Dr. Weiss from Geneva, surgeon to the stars!
I'm not the one who sucks fat from cashiers and hairdressers.
His father dreamed he would get married a cardiologist, a neurologist...
Alright, we continue with your silly complex.
Am I wrong?
A husband cannot operate in his wife's breasts.
It's clear.
You will not come to me for therapy.
You don't even believe what I do.
I don't agree.
- Stop it. - In fact, our work has a lot in common.
You fix your head, I fix the donkey and breast. All to make people feel better.
Except with you, it takes years. With me, two hours.
I agree, it's not pretty, but it's faster.
Calm down! It's just broccoli.
Wait... There's no more... I'll get more wine.
Do you want to be whiter? Yes?
Okay, I'll get it.
Broccoli?
We stopped at McDonald's afterwards.
Beno├ «t, I have a small problem.
I need your help.
When you use my full name, is not a good sign.
No, don't worry, that's no big deal.
Well, something like that.
Okay... I have a friend. Every night, he sent me...
What?
Photo of him.
- I see. - No, you don't.
- I can imagine. - Not!
Not what you think. This is a private joke. Just to laugh.
- To laugh? Well. - Yes
I'm sure your wife won't laugh.
Exactly. That's where you enter.
I did not follow.
We have the same phone.
We exchanged it until I got the picture.
Then I'm a cheating person. Thank you.
- What do you care about? You are single. - No, not me!
I'm not single anymore.
Tonight, you.
I hardly know this girl. I've never met him.
Beno├ «t.
We've been friends since third grade.
You have to help me.
Charlotte is also my friend.
Not for a long time, but still... That makes me uncomfortable.
Not comfortable?
I ask to help avoid disaster and you are not comfortable?
A family is torn apart, children are pushed back and forth.
Shout and cry, thanks to whom?
Mr. Not comfortable.
What photo?
It's nothing... really.
Come on, Ben.
- No. - What?
No.
- Ben? - No, it's impossible.
What?
Ben!
Back!
Let's rent a yurt.
- Yurt? - Yes
Yes. Or we can go to Normandy.
- No, I have enough... - Let's do something very different!
- Rain jacket in August, no thanks. - What do you want me to do in a yurt?
Wait, I will serve you.
But... staying in a yurt is a fun activity.
We can have fun elsewhere.
How about a cruise on a canal boat?
- What will I do there? - Great idea!
But Marie gets seasick.
If I'm pregnant this summer, so am I.
I don't get enough bread, but usually you never eat everything.
Usually, we eat something else.
What's wrong?
I don't know if I can tell you.
But Charlotte, You know you can tell me anything.
Yes. You are right.
This is it.
Your husband...
Your husband is looking at a psychiatrist!
- Vincent? - Yes.
Don't say a word. I swear to Marco, I will not tell you.
That's me!
Steve Jobs?
This is mine!
Steve Jobs.
It's okay, it's just work.
Okay, answer.
Answer this.
I told you, this is work.
This will be boring and long, not...
If we start cheating, I leave.
Yes.
Someone is suspicious.
Hello?
Hello, Jean-Yves?
Mrs. Courtois?
Yes. Good evening, Jean-Yves.
Good evening, Mrs. Courtois.
I'm sorry to call so late, but I'm on vacation tomorrow.
Your computer is ready.
- Thank you very much. - I'll leave it at the reception.
Perfect. I will look for it on Monday.
- Yes. - And...
Enjoy your vacation. Where are you going?
To the beach with my wife. This is a honeymoon we have never experienced.
Good luck.
Yes, thank you.
Goodbye now.
This is it. Happy now?
Steve Jobs?
He is an IT person.
Zidane sounds wrong.
Speaking of football... "Pascal: game tomorrow."
Yes. I understand that too.
I'm the same.
We play tomorrow? I got nothing.
- Maybe you don't have a signal. - Yes, it's very weak here.
Who is your provider?
You kicked me from the team?
- Don't look at me. - Of course not!
You really are a bastard.
You only call me when you need it a goalkeeper. I'm the only pro here.
Pro?
I am a sports teacher, right?
Of course.
Reboot the phone. That might help.
Or hold it higher. You might take a network.
What?
- "Carole Dispatcher." - Not again!
"Call me. Very urgent !!!"
With three exclamation marks!
Who is this Carole
who should you call back immediately?
Taxi operator.
"A car is needed in the corner of St. Paul in ten minutes."
Well, call him first.
That's the game, isn't it? I have to answer Steve Jobs.
Time is up. Very...
No, there's no time to run out!
- He will ruin our weekend. Serious - Yes, that's right.
- You're all cheating. I'm done. - Hey!
Come on, Marco.
If he needs me to work, I have to go now.
- You see? - Okay, time-out.
Very bad. We want to meet Carole.
With three exclamation points. Skip bread?
To be honest, you've all been disappointed.
She's really rubbish.
Terrible tattoos with fake breasts.
Thank you very much!
What I mean...
Damn, sorry. ME...
They are not just fake...
I mean, they are fake,
but they...
Hers...
they are too fake.
What's wrong with him?
Stomach flu?
Are you ready? Go away! One two, one two...
What are you doing?
This is a new application. "Fizz Up."
20 weeks training program.
Twenty seconds every time it sounds.
Do you lose 20 kilograms?
No, eight.
That's tearing up!
Twenty weeks? When did you start?
Yesterday.
Sorry, I have no choice. Every beep.
Even at night?
If it sounds, yes.
Just turn it off. Who knows?
See you later.
No, I can't.
I don't cheat.
- I will, if I become you. - Me, too.
Twenty weeks, day and night, is really a nightmare.
You know, by liposuction, You can sleep at night.
I don't like needles.
I want to be a trustworthy sports teacher.
And then maybe the football texts won't get lost again.
Does your application know how much foie gras do you eat?
Quality food is not fattening.
Now, in that case, help yourself!
I'm really stupid!
At least it's not biodynamic. That will burn the hole.
Come to the kitchen.
Don't worry about that.
- No, it will be tarnished. - I will only change clothes.
Come on. It will be stained if I don't wet it.
- OK. - Come on.
He is very awkward.
Bye-bye, tailor-made shirt!
Done.
What?
No! I say no.
Very late.
I said no!
Hey! This summer...
white water rafting in Ard├¿che.
- Don't be silly, Marco. You can't swim. - Right.
I am very awkward.
I'm sorry.
Why don't you tell me?
What about?
About psychiatrists.
Who is this? Do I know them?
No.
How long have you been away?
Six months.
Are you angry?
No.
Yes, a little.
What made you decide?
I don't know...
Many things.
We can't be like Ken and Barbie.
You, with plastic breasts, and me, without balls.
I'll go and change clothes.
Kiss me before you eat it.
This is good. Feel it.
- This is good. - No, it smells weird.
Sorry.
- Heavy and fatty. - Is it fat?
Oh, yes, it's very fatty. Very difficult to digest.
- Is everything okay, Marie? - Yes, he just changed his clothes.
- Is that good? - Yes, very good.
That's good, but a little...
It's a little too fat for me.
- Whose is this? - This is yours, Ben.
- A photo! - "X"?
Who is "X"?
- It's mysterious. - Yes, who is this "X"?
Only a colleague from St. Genevieve's.
He is not a teacher, he is...
He works in the admin, but he is not powerful.
I thought he was in training.
And... he sent me a photo... sometimes.
No... not too often.
Let's see.
No, they are boring. I never opened it.
Come on. Play the game, Ben. Show us the picture.
- Show the picture! - We all want to see photos!
Even he doesn't see it.
Yes, but we can see everything together.
- Show us! - That's the rule!
Show us!
- Show the picture. - Show us!
Damn it!
- Oh wow! - You will damage it.
Show us what's on your mobile!
Oh Boy!
- What? - The way to go, "X"!
Show us!
You are a naughty boy!
Look, how flexible he is!
Show us!
- Look at how flexible he is! - Yes, I see.
Show me!
Vincent!
No, it's not for girls.
Don't look. Vincent, come here!
This is your expertise. Vincent!
Let me see!
- I want your opinion, what do you think? - Gosh!
Come on, show us!
I don't even know where it went.
- Let's see! - This is not for girls!
- Charlotte! - They went wild. Take!
They are crazy!
God!
- Is this girl your date tonight? - No, that's not him.
That's disgusting.
Show Marco!
I see it, Charlotte.
How do you do it?
It's impossible to do with stomach flu.
I can't even do it.
It must be risky, in my medical opinion.
Who is this "X"?
- Isn't this fun? - Good.
Who is this "X"?
This is a private joke. To laugh.
I only like your sense of humor.
- To "X"! - For X-Woman!
I don't know him, but I like him.
Certainly.
- Will you try it for me? - Come on, Marco!
Yes.
To "X."
Whose is this?
Yours.
- What's with that ridiculous ringtone? - I do not know.
Children must play with it.
That's... Julien. Good. He asks how I am.
Not very interesting.
But it's good.
Good...
But who is Julien?
Julien is a co-worker, like your Jean-Yves.
She's in the legal department. A very nice guy.
You met at an office party.
You even talked to him.
You succeeded!
I don't remember.
That's the problem.
You never remember. This is not easy.
And why does he want to know how are you?
At this hour?
Because...
we were arguing this afternoon because of a stupid accounting problem.
Which one is that?
Stupid or good?
Good and stupid. Well?
It could be both, you know.
I will tell him I was having dinner with friends and we will talk on Monday.
- No big deal. - Wait a minute...
Why tell him where you are? Who cares?
He's a man from a job that you hardly know.
Just say he's sleeping.
If you want to make up, don't lie.
Especially now it's only 9:30 a.m. That sounds suspicious.
Very strange.
Who cares? He can tell the truth.
Yes, I will tell the truth.
No!
- Ben! - This person is crazy!
What happened to privacy?
In the past, "Hi, how are you?"
Now, "Hi, where are you?" Who cares where we are?
Leave us alone!
Ben is right. He only asks how I am.
Exactly!
Where you are is your business.
Those things are death privacy.
We are willing to be victims, lost our freedom little by little.
I really agree with you.
In fact, I will not answer it.
- There. - No, you won't answer!
Because you are free!
Who has it?
This is Vincent's.
Vincent. SMS.
I have an e-mail!
Okay, but Vincent left first.
Good...
What?
Is that so?
There is a 30% discount at the garden shop and I can't go.
How stupid.
Your turn, Charlotte.
No, wait!
- Calm down! - He is crazy.
"Cyril said, & apos; Read the last e-mail. & Apos;"
That's Siri, not Cyril.
I found an e-mail at 9:39 a.m.
Senior Residence Nursing Home send you e-mail
about your application.
It reads: "Madam, we confirm your application receipt
to Les Lilas residence for seniors.
We will contact you soon so you can use it first free month
after confirmation of being a resident.
Caroline Agranier, Director Les Lilas Senior Residence. "
Do you want to reply?
- Do you want to reply? - No.
No!
Senior residence?
Who is this crazy person?
Sending e-mail to this hour.
What is it?
A nursing home?
I don't know.
Yes I understand!
Not last weekend, but last week, I went there with a friend ,
a coworker, who wants to move his mother there.
So, I look around,
and that... is very beautiful.
I think I asked for information.
" Information"?
Because they mentioned the application.
Will you send my mother home?
- This isn't home, okay? - I do not care.
- This is a place to live. - Stop it!
This woman admires you.
He arranged everything, even though his hips.
Houses, children...
- Yes - Everything.
And in return, he gets a room and a meal.
Then? Do you want me to ask my mother to pay the rent?
Well, this...
- Yes. - Thomas!
And why not?
He got a pension.
Do you know what we keep every year in the babysitter thanks to him?
You don't know. But if you want, we can do things differently.
But in this case, there is no ski holiday.
Shoot, not a ski vacation!
At least admit it's not the same with him staying at home!
"Not the same"? In what way?
In what ways?
Let me see...
I can think of one specifically.
Great! Continue.
Stop this.
You know exactly what I'm talking about.
- No, I don't. - Yes, right.
No.
- Yes. - Not!
Yes, right.
I don't understand.
- You do it! - Not me.
Yes!
No.
Yes!
Okay, I understand.
You think because my mother lives with us,
That's the reason we don't do that anymore?
Yes, it's true.
That's right, it's unconscious, mom's closeness...
can have a neutering effect.
- This is general knowledge. - Castrate.
I can confirm. Castrate...
Yes, but, you know...
I, for example, love my mother-in-law, but I can never live with her.
Same here.
Even if my mom pays rent, is not possible.
Modern nursing homes are good. Four stars.
This is not a nursing home!
Yes I know. Sorry.
And...
Honest. Your mother is a little...
I mean, he's not too...
I mean...
- You know him, he's your mother. - Yes, but I didn't follow you.
Marco, when I was little, he scared me.
- Exactly. - He hit me harder than my own father.
That hand... That beard...
I admire it. Everyone does it.
But you have to admit he's a champion soccer hunter.
you too?
No, but honest...
You said it yourself.
He has his temperament...
There we go.
Amen! Thank you.
Time of picture?
Oh, yes, the picture!
No, only Ben took his cellphone. Others stay on the table.
No.
You said you have no place. You take too many pictures.
Why, can we use your phone?
Sure.
You take too many pictures.
- Does it match your stick? - Yes
A place is open and you get an e-mail! New resident!
- Right, always full! - They succeeded.
Always.
Parents are the future.
Squeeze together so we see an eclipse.
One...
two...
three...
YVAN HAI!
- What does he want at this hour? - I do not know.
- Who is this? - This is his ex. Lapa, what does he want?
I don't know, he just said, "Hi."
- Come on, take this photo! - Ex?
One two...
Thomas, smile!
Calm down. I don't care about that guy.
- Okay, let's go. - Is this his ex?
- Yes, this is his ex. - Come on.
One,
two three...
Why did you save him with his first name, Yvan? "
That's the name. How else can I save it?
First name Last name, like everyone else.
Oh dear...
You saved my brother as Pascal Auclair.
You don't put "brother-in-law" or Paco.
Leave it alone. This is his ex. What does "ex" mean?
That means "ex."
- Yes - Or "sex."
- He can't be trusted. - Come on!
In my opinion, costs are... dangerous.
- Let's take the picture. - Let's go.
Especially if you dump him. His ego speaks, not his heart.
Okay... one...
Who discarded who?
I dumped him. There.
So, that's his ego. He will not give up.
Stop it. I know what you are planning.
- Do we take this picture or not? - Up to Ben.
Ben, are you ready?
She's joking, right?
Let's go. One two...
Smile, Thomas!
I'm cool. That person is not dangerous.
One...
Do we take this picture?
One two three...
YVAN I'M IN MOOD FOR FUCK
You bastard!
I swear, I will kill him.
I don't care. He died.
- My love... - I'll kill him!
Not what you think.
What is this text?
I'm not the one he wants...
So what is that? Group text?
So what is that?
Stop laughing, damn it!
- She's right, it's not too good. - Okay, I'm listening.
Yvan has seen this girl for a few months.
It's only sex for him. So he pretends it's the same for him.
- Then? I do not understand. - Well...
He pretended not to care, but actually he was crazy about him.
He doesn't know how to tell him. It makes him sick like a dog.
He has to call a veterinarian, not my wife.
Marco, stop laughing!
Honest... dear...
Come back here, we take photos!
We will do it later.
Veterinarian!
What's wrong with you?
Why did you lose it to Yvan?
What about the picture?
We will never accept it.
I'll call now.
You don't need to do it. I do not care.
- I did. - If you think I'm jealous, then you...
Less than one hour before the month completely disappears.
Many are getting ready ªª
Thank you for calling. Sorry to disturb you, but it's urgent.
- Did he call? - He invited me.
Don't leave. It will get worse.
It can't be worse. I'm obsessed.
It makes me sick, physically ill.
I thought I would leave.
Why did you call me Have you decided to leave?
Who else can I contact?
Okay... I don't know what to say to you, Yvan.
Well... enjoy your night.
Thank you.
Good. Bye
Satisfied?
Does he often call?
- Sometimes. - Means?
- Every time he wants... - I understand. Thank you.
When he calls me crying, what should I do? Close him?
I don't care. Give him Marie's number.
She needs a psychiatrist, not her ex-husband.
This is a cheese plate. Come on, sit down.
Fromaggi!
You really are sick.
I think you are allergic to milk?
I know medically - it's weird, but I'm not allergic to cheese.
Maybe it's a fermentation process or...
Medically, the diagnosis is simple.
You are annoying.
You are wrong.
- Yes, you. - It is not that.
- Charlotte, what are you... I will do it. - What?
- I'll do it, sit down. - I am doing fine.
I will clean the plate.
Sit down.
- Honest. - I am doing fine!
Let me tell you something. Yvanmu...
want to make love to you.
But... that's ridiculous.
I did not contact one of my assignments.
They don't want to talk to you.
Stop. I'm serious.
If it bothers you, I'll tell him to stop calling. Is that better?
Yes, that will happen.
Oh... I don't think that makes sense
You can't talk to a friend because your husband doesn't trust you.
What? That has nothing to do with it! I trust him.
I don't trust him.
I know people like this. I can sniff them.
- He is a horndog. - Why are you saying that?
- He looks really good. - She is.
Is he a person who lives in Nantes?
Nantes... Isn't that where you dream of living?
She's right!
You say that when we talk about Ben's work.
You say you want to live there, that Nantes is a great city. Explain!
OK, but that might hurt you.
Are you sure you want the truth?
Yes I'm sure.
Your two best friends just screwed you up.
No, he doesn't live in Nantes, baby!
You bastard.
You are a jerk.
Oh no! It's full of germs!
- Forgive me my love. - Eat cheese.
Yes! Cheese!
The man said, "I started a business."
His friend said, "What kind of thing is it? You suck everything."
He said, "I found this object which turns dirt into butter."
Not that!
Let me finish!
- Stop it! - There's no funny thing.
- That's a joke. - Telephone!
That's Margot.
So the answer.
Hi honey. Everything is fine?
Yes I'm fine.
Can I talk to you?
Of course, I listen.
I don't know how to say this, but Tristan's parents left tonight.
He wants me to leave the party and go home with him.
Only the two of us.
And...
It could be you...
Do you understand?
Daddy?
And how do you feel?
I don't know what to do.
Because I didn't expect it.
Well, not tonight, in any case.
And... the problem is, if I say no, it will make it awkward between us.
What did I do?
If you will only avoid make strange things...
Then don't leave.
You must be sure.
I... don't know what to do.
Because this morning, when you gave me a condom box,
I'm really uncomfortable.
You don't need to use it tonight.
I think you feel it.
And you really miss it, as usual.
Daddy?
Yes dear.
What did I do?
You know...
it's not easy for a father to tell his daughter...
on something very important.
If it's just about me, I would say,
"Don't do it.
Don't ever do it.
Stay my little girl forever."
But that is not possible.
So, you need to decide for yourself.
You will never forget that moment.
So make sure it's a good memory.
It might sound tacky, but...
there is only one time.
So if it's deep inside,
you're not sure,
don't do it.
There will be another moment, believe me.
Yes.
Thank you for being there.
Mother just scolded me.
He never understood anything.
He never listens to me.
Of course he listens to you, but...
You know, it's not easy for him too.
He sometimes feels like you don't understand him too.
I think you love him too much to see how annoying he really is.
Okay, he is here. I hung up.
- Margot. - Thank you.
You did it very well.
You seem to be helping.
No problem.
I know you all know.
It's true, you did very well.
Oh, yes, this is yours.
Oh yeah.
JULIEN SO...? REPLY ME.
He is quite insistent.
What did he say?
He said, "Answer me!"
So the answer. Let's finish.
No.
Marco, answer him.
- We agreed not to do it. - Enough, Ben.
You make your point.
Marco, answer him. Period.
me. "I'm with friends. See you Monday."
When I was little, my mother would...
- You prick. - What?
He calls you a bastard.
Why is he so aggressive?
I have no idea. How can I find out?
She's the bastard.
What can I say?
JULIEN HOME
Go first, ask him. He called.
Continue, answer.
No, he is sick in the buttocks.
Answer.
Hello?
You can drop fake laryngitis.
If you are really sick, you will not come out.
I understand. Don't answer.
Do you want to know what your problem is? You are not sure you like men.
So, go away.
You don't really think...
Friend, this is crazy!
You scared me.
She's gay and she likes me.
I can't help it. It's weird, but there's nothing I can do.
Did something happen to this man?
Did something happen?
- Yes or no? - Enough of this nonsense.
Charlotte. I told you, this person fantasized.
Please help me, friends.
- Tell him. - Yes, it's true that fags--
I mean, gay, always straight minded little gay, without knowing it.
And so on...
They tried their luck.
That's a pretty homophobic statement.
You don't just suddenly wake up gay. There are early signs.
That's what I meant.
I remember, when he was little, he often wore a dress to school.
Stop that.
Ben, am I not right?
Marco.
Did something happen to this man?
Charlotte, we have been married for 15 years. This is me, your husband.
Do you not recognize me?
Charlotte, look at me.
Look at me.
Look at me, Charlotte!
Seriously, can you see me with a man?
Can you? Yes or no?
Nothing happened to this person.
I swear on the lives of our children.
Good.
Here...
He said he missed your lips.
He swore on the lives of my children.
I married a monster.
A monster!
I'm losing words.
Don't say anything. Better.
Excuse me?
What's the tone?
- Will you start too? - Not.
Ben, give me a salad.
Do you have a problem?
No. I do not have problem.
The cheese is very tasty.
Stop it, Thomas.
He is still the same man, your friend, you share everything with.
No, not all, thank God!
Stop the crap, Thomas.
No problem with me. I am not against it.
He's a free man.
- Are you not against it? - Calm down.
What is the real problem?
That you don't know, or maybe I'm a homo?
Stop saying "gay". It didn't work in your mouth.
- What in my mouth? - Meathead.
Say that again.
- What in my mouth? - Thomas, calm down!
- Do you want me to apologize? - Yes, calm down.
I'm sorry. Please forgive me.
He lied to us for 35 years and nobody cares besides me?
If that makes me a weak person, is fine with me.
... the shadow of the earth covers it.
Rare phenomenon, where the month is at the closest point to earth,
perfectly aligns with the sun.
Fag, fag, fag...
I am allowed to say it. He is my husband.
Maybe he is telling the truth. Maybe the partner is fantasizing.
Many of my patients have that fantasy.
Just because he tidied his chest doesn't mean...
How stupid are you?
He misses his lips!
That can't be clearer.
How long has this happened?
- You are ridiculous. - How long has this happened?
Tell me.
Not long.
Okay, please...
No.
And before him?
- What? - How much before him?
Nobody.
Thank you for dinner.
Why now?
Come on, let's go.
Good idea.
We can check children,
since you swore on their lives.
Charlotte, please, come with me.
No.
You can go home.
I live here.
- Charlotte. - Charlotte lives here.
MAX JEWLERY
- Who knows Max Jewelry? - This is mine. Leave it, Chacha.
Leave.
Hello, Tom?
Yup, I'll pass you by.
No, don't do it! Don't!
She's crazy.
Yes, Max?
Did you not listen to your message? I have left you at least ten.
Yes, I know, but this is rather complicated tonight. I'll call you back.
I'm starting to be paranoid. I think it's about the necklace.
Does he like it?
Yes, he likes it.
I like it.
- I told you to trust me. - Yes
It's not gold, but...
Yes, listen, can I call you later? This is not the right time.
- Goodbye. - Oh okay.
What about the earrings? Does he like earrings?
Can I call you later?
- You don't sound too sure. - Listen, I'll call you back. Bye
Who likes the earrings?
None.
What do you mean, "nobody is there"? Who are they for?
for you.
Where are they?
I don't even have pierced ears.
Yes I know. That's why I never gave it to you.
We have to stop this game.
Very.
DISPATCHER CAROLE HOME
He never gave up.
What are the earrings for him? Miss Dispatcher?
Honey, he wants me to work.
That's it.
No, give it to me.
Give me a phone, Pepper!
Place it.
- What are the earrings for him? - Put it down.
Come here. Give it to me.
- Hello, Tom? - Give it to me!
Hello?
Baby?
My love, I have to see you soon.
I panic. I bought the test from the pharmacy and I got a blue X.
The box says it's "positive."
"Positive" means we are pregnant, right?
Oh no.
Hello?
honey? Tom?
Can you hear me? Hello?
My love!
Wait!
OK please.
It's okay, just leave it.
- I'm sorry, honey, I'm... - Making love! Fuck!
Chacha, don't close the door!
Open, Chacha!
My love. Laa!
Leave, Thomas!
Forgive me my love.
The woman is pregnant and I'm the one who vomits.
L├⌐a, please, open the door. Lapa.
But why?
Why?
We just got married. We have sex every day.
We are happy.
- Why? - I do not know why.
I told you to get lost!
I don't want to get married.
You told me that we would be happy. I trust you.
Why is Carole involved with her big breasts?
Leave, Thomas!
This is me, Charlotte. Open.
You can get lost too!
Open.
I told you to leave.
You got a Facebook message.
Someone wants to know if you wear underwear.
I don't know him.
We have never met.
I've never met him, Marco!
Never!
I swear.
In the lives of our children?
This is a game. We send messages to each other occasionally.
Games must be in fashion.
I told you, I don't know him. We have never even spoken.
Calling it. It seems like a good time.
I can't call him.
I can't call him here, now.
He has life, family...
And you don't?
I told you, there's nothing... really!
Well... This is virtual.
If it's nothing, just call him.
He gave you his telephone number.
In March, for God's sake. That was more than six months ago.
We never called each other.
Well, now you can finally meet.
- You are a fool. - Hello?
- Charlotte? - Speak.
- No. - Is that you?
- No. - Forgive me.
I shouldn't have sent you a message.
Charlotte?
Yes, it's me.
What a surprise.
I want to meet you.
We have decided not to do it.
But if you change your mind, we can.
No, you are right. I don't think that's a good idea.
We better not meet.
Sorry, but I have to hang up.
One more second.
You have a beautiful voice.
Just so you know...
Are you?
What am I?
- Do you wear underwear or not? - Marco...
Why do you care?
If you are a homo.
That didn't stop me from being curious.
- Panties or no panties? - Stop it.
- Yes or no? - Stop it, Marco!
- Stop. - Stop it.
Seeing.
Now you know.
If you don't love me anymore, why don't you leave me?
Why don't you leave me?
I'm homo.
What?
The homo.
This is me.
With capital F.
Homo!
I am allowed to say it. This is me.
I told you it wasn't a good idea to exchange cellphones.
By the way, I'm sorry, Doctor, but I never had the initial signs.
There has never been a dress that suits me.
Don't say that. You don't need to do it.
Ben.
Is that why they fired you?
What do you think?
They can't do that.
You can't let them.
Look at how you react tonight.
Now imagine my colleagues in St. Genevieve's.
Not to mention my parents.
It would be nice...
It would be nice to meet Julien.
I don't think so.
I have gotten used to your jokes since the third grade.
But I'm afraid he will feel uncomfortable on the first funny look.
And I don't want him to feel uncomfortable.
When you love someone, you protect them.
Why?
Open.
Lapa, answer me.
My love!
Laa, answer! Open the door!
Help me out. He locks himself and won't answer.
- L├⌐a, open the door. Answer! - What is going on?
Why?
- Step aside. - Wait...
Damn, my capsulitis!
Laa!
- Honey, please answer me. - Stay beside.
Move.
Are you okay, my love?
Lapa, please answer me.
Here.
Your mother called. I told him you would be a father.
He is very happy.
Lapa.
You're right. Take care of your Julien for yourself.
Chase him.
Laa!
If you switch phones,
"X" sent the photo to you.
Who is he?
None.
She's virtual, like your Facebook guy.
What happened to us?
Laa!
I won.
- I told you I'd beat you on the way down. - Congratulations, my love.
Don't call my mom at this hour.
He doesn't bring them clubbing!
Keep the cellphone.
Can't you wait to go home?
Destructive atmosphere.
That's it. Eclipse ends.
That's pretty pretty.
It's beautiful, but the food is terrible.
Foie gras in milk. He is crazy.
- Eclipse is good, right? - Yes
We don't need a taxi. Will you drop us off, Thomas?
Why don't I buy Smart, like Ben?
Smart people don't make good taxis.
I will send the photo to you.
Oh yeah. Like you always do.
We want to meet your new girl.
Right, what's the name again?
- Julie. - Say hi to us.
Let's go. The meter is on.
Let me know if we play tomorrow.
I don't get text, so I doubt it.
But I will tell you.
JULIEN SO...? REPLY ME.
He never gives up!
- Operator officer? - Yes!
He wants me to work on weekends.
He's crazy.
Oh, shit, parking ticket.
- I told you. - This is a defective place.
Why? There are no disabled people here. That's a myth.
EVERYTHING IS GOOD. SLEEP. TALKING TOMORROW.
Too bad we didn't play the phone game.
That can be fun.
Fun?
I doubt that.
I don't care what is on your cellphone.
Falling in love, like in friendship, some things should be kept secret.
These stickers never come off!
Oh, I just want to go home.
Thomas, children!
Dirt. I can't let it go.
Damn it!
DISPATCHER CAROLE MY PHONE. SUPER URGENT !!!
Are you ready? Go away!
One two. One two.