1 00:00:21,121 --> 00:00:23,323 Hello. I should use a microphone. 2 00:00:23,457 --> 00:00:24,457 Hi. 3 00:00:25,058 --> 00:00:26,058 God. 4 00:00:26,493 --> 00:00:27,561 Thank you. 5 00:00:31,732 --> 00:00:32,799 Thank you. 6 00:00:34,501 --> 00:00:36,703 Thank you. That is the perfect number of applause. 7 00:00:36,770 --> 00:00:39,239 I don't have to stand here too awkwardly long 8 00:00:39,306 --> 00:00:41,174 Thank you for coming. I'm Jen 9 00:00:41,241 --> 00:00:45,212 If you don't know, maybe you enter, Now you have fun with me. 10 00:00:45,612 --> 00:00:46,647 Um... 11 00:00:47,547 --> 00:00:50,717 That has caught my attention by a doctor, 12 00:00:51,084 --> 00:00:54,087 some independent yoga teachers, and all those who have met me 13 00:00:54,454 --> 00:00:55,455 that I am joined high. 14 00:00:56,089 --> 00:01:01,528 And... it's been suggested... therapy isn't enough, 15 00:01:01,762 --> 00:01:03,497 that I need to meditate. 16 00:01:04,431 --> 00:01:08,168 So, now, I am one of these people who meditate. 17 00:01:08,835 --> 00:01:12,739 And with "I meditate," I mean, "I never meditate." 18 00:01:13,140 --> 00:01:14,808 But... 19 00:01:16,109 --> 00:01:20,347 I have a meditation playlist, some gongs go, "gong, gong." 20 00:01:20,414 --> 00:01:23,283 I have an application, I think about meditation. 21 00:01:23,350 --> 00:01:25,585 I have a meditation chair in my living room 22 00:01:26,486 --> 00:01:28,522 You also have it. It's just a fucking chair. 23 00:01:28,588 --> 00:01:29,723 But... 24 00:01:30,557 --> 00:01:34,294 I put the candle beside it and I call it my meditation chair, huh. 25 00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:37,397 And when you come, I show you, 26 00:01:37,464 --> 00:01:41,768 "Oh, don't mind that, that's all, um... That's my meditation chair, yeah. No, every morning I wake up and I think about doing it and I don't do it. I wake up and I... sit in it and take a few deep breaths. 27 00:01:42,169 --> 00:01:45,505 Don't be intimidated, you can sit in it if you want. Yes, this is not... 28 00:01:45,639 --> 00:01:49,242 Not everyone in the spiritual field the same, 29 00:01:49,309 --> 00:01:52,546 but we have no rules 30 00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:55,115 in this... happy to go home with a chair and... 31 00:01:55,182 --> 00:01:56,617 Don't worry about why the candle has never been lit, just... " 32 00:01:56,683 --> 00:01:59,286 33 00:01:59,353 --> 00:02:01,822 34 00:02:05,759 --> 00:02:09,162 But this one day, I did meditate because I had to do something important. 35 00:02:10,297 --> 00:02:12,799 I want to write and I want someone to pay me for it. 36 00:02:12,866 --> 00:02:15,335 I want an interview and I want to get it. 37 00:02:15,402 --> 00:02:18,305 So, if you say, There is a slight nerve in the morning. 38 00:02:18,772 --> 00:02:20,841 I think Maybe I will try this meditation thing 39 00:02:20,907 --> 00:02:22,476 what everyone is talking about 40 00:02:22,542 --> 00:02:24,611 And I do it about five minutes meditation. 41 00:02:25,412 --> 00:02:28,181 And if you aren't impressed with that, then you never meditate. 42 00:02:30,584 --> 00:02:34,554 Because after five seconds, you like, "Why did God stop time?" 43 00:02:37,691 --> 00:02:42,629 Five minutes are long to clear your mind of things and I do it. 44 00:02:43,363 --> 00:02:45,499 And I wake up and get out of it and I like: 45 00:02:45,666 --> 00:02:49,736 "Oh, I understand what everyone is talking about. I feel very... 46 00:02:49,803 --> 00:02:51,338 Like, I can handle anything. If I don't have to leave home today, I can really handle anything . " 47 00:02:51,405 --> 00:02:56,777 But I have to leave home. So, I entered my car and I drive in traffic in Los Angeles 9 a.m. 48 00:02:58,311 --> 00:03:00,847 When I see the green light, I'm like, "Green beauty." 49 00:03:00,914 --> 00:03:03,950 50 00:03:04,217 --> 00:03:06,753 51 00:03:06,820 --> 00:03:09,856 And I'm trying to find out What does green mean, like, at a deeper level. 52 00:03:11,224 --> 00:03:13,326 And I'm like, "Green, what can I say to me?" 53 00:03:13,393 --> 00:03:14,928 And I didn't realize at the time, 54 00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:17,664 What I need to know about green that means fucking go 55 00:03:17,731 --> 00:03:20,300 So, I, "Green," and I began to slow down. 56 00:03:20,367 --> 00:03:22,903 And the people behind me start losing it 57 00:03:22,969 --> 00:03:24,738 because they are late for work. 58 00:03:24,805 --> 00:03:27,841 And that's how they are, "beeping!" and they sound their horns and horns, 59 00:03:27,908 --> 00:03:31,678 and I'm like, "Oh, now it's yellow. Oh, red. Oh, that's fun." 60 00:03:31,745 --> 00:03:35,682 And I realized... I stopped on a red light, normal, 61 00:03:35,749 --> 00:03:39,453 but I really stopped at the green light. And then I realized, "Oh, my God, I... 62 00:03:39,519 --> 00:03:42,289 I messed up these people." That can make a difference 63 00:03:42,355 --> 00:03:45,459 between them being early and late. People behind are very upset like: 64 00:03:46,359 --> 00:03:49,863 I saw it in the rearview mirror. And I just... I feel very calm, 65 00:03:49,930 --> 00:03:51,832 because I meditated. Yes so... 66 00:03:53,266 --> 00:03:57,604 I just turned around and gave him a wave It just said like, "I'm very sorry. 67 00:03:57,971 --> 00:04:00,640 I'm sorry you thought You're late for work, but... 68 00:04:04,010 --> 00:04:05,445 You don't know what I know. 69 00:04:07,013 --> 00:04:09,783 There is no time, yes, yes. " 70 00:04:10,450 --> 00:04:12,686 I'm even embarrassed to say that I heard the horn 71 00:04:12,753 --> 00:04:14,488 It doesn't really meditate from me. 72 00:04:14,888 --> 00:04:16,823 Is that sound, isn't it? That... 73 00:04:18,325 --> 00:04:20,560 That's just the meaning I'm placed on it, right? 74 00:04:20,627 --> 00:04:23,764 I've been able to hear anything. I've been able to hear butterflies eating sweets. 75 00:04:23,830 --> 00:04:27,434 So... I'm driving, feel very good about myself, 76 00:04:27,501 --> 00:04:30,704 and only, like... Much better than other people who are very angry And that is that meditation, is to feel superior to others. 77 00:04:30,771 --> 00:04:33,974 So... 78 00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:35,642 79 00:04:36,743 --> 00:04:39,646 I turn the corner and we go to the next traffic light... 80 00:04:40,347 --> 00:04:43,517 and I pulled it and so did the man Behind me was all upset. 81 00:04:43,583 --> 00:04:47,053 And I have an open sunroof, window below 82 00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:48,588 I'm very happy to be able. 83 00:04:48,655 --> 00:04:50,991 Again, did I mention it? I meditated that morning? 84 00:04:51,691 --> 00:04:52,793 And the man next to me, 85 00:04:52,859 --> 00:04:55,595 what do you think about Los Angeles if you haven't 86 00:04:55,662 --> 00:04:58,932 A man with a producer, is kind of chewing a cigar, 87 00:04:58,999 --> 00:05:03,537 bald, rather fat, in the red BMW, Maybe 50, two divorces. 88 00:05:03,770 --> 00:05:06,339 And he sat there and he was annoyed at me. 89 00:05:06,406 --> 00:05:09,042 And he was in his car... and he just looked up and left, 90 00:05:09,543 --> 00:05:12,479 "Hey, idiot, What did you do at that time?" 91 00:05:13,947 --> 00:05:15,682 And I just sit in my car like: 92 00:05:21,388 --> 00:05:22,556 "I meditate today. 93 00:05:24,024 --> 00:05:25,024 Can't be angry 94 00:05:28,395 --> 00:05:30,730 How does it feel to kill him? Don't think about it." 95 00:05:33,700 --> 00:05:36,836 So, he shouted again, "Hey, stupid, what did you do at that time? 96 00:05:36,903 --> 00:05:38,038 Sending your girlfriend?" 97 00:05:39,539 --> 00:05:40,539 That one caught me. 98 00:05:41,942 --> 00:05:44,844 Because I don't have a boyfriend and I'm not happy with that. 99 00:05:46,079 --> 00:05:49,082 Then I'm upset. I like, "He thinks I text my girlfriend? 100 00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:52,018 That's what he thinks when a woman makes a traffic mistake? 101 00:05:52,085 --> 00:05:54,821 It's always about a man. Whenever you see a stack of five cars, 102 00:05:54,888 --> 00:05:58,091 It's like, 'Are you going home for dinner? or not? '"You know? 103 00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:03,563 So, I'm like, " This person won't bully me. 104 00:06:03,630 --> 00:06:06,566 Fuck this I don't care about meditation. Everyone is angry. 105 00:06:06,633 --> 00:06:07,767 I'm not a saint. " 106 00:06:07,834 --> 00:06:09,903 It doesn't mean they meditate, but whatever they do 107 00:06:09,970 --> 00:06:13,073 So, I put the car in the park and I stand in my seat 108 00:06:13,139 --> 00:06:16,776 109 00:06:18,678 --> 00:06:21,815 110 00:06:29,856 --> 00:06:32,959 111 00:06:35,428 --> 00:06:38,798 112 00:06:38,865 --> 00:06:40,533 113 00:06:41,001 --> 00:06:43,603 114 00:06:43,670 --> 00:06:47,107 115 00:06:48,708 --> 00:06:51,611 116 00:06:51,745 --> 00:06:54,848 about what he did like him, "Oh, my God, I have to think 117 00:06:54,914 --> 00:06:57,617 before I speak and put myself in someone else's shoes. 118 00:06:57,684 --> 00:07:00,453 You never know what someone is experiencing. 119 00:07:01,655 --> 00:07:04,824 So, I told him something was right, That is, I really said it. 120 00:07:04,891 --> 00:07:06,459 Content is not true. 121 00:07:08,828 --> 00:07:11,698 I said, "What did I do? I am thinking. 122 00:07:11,765 --> 00:07:14,768 I just found out my mother died this morning. " 123 00:07:15,969 --> 00:07:18,705 I didn't say that I was a good person, I just said I was meditating. 124 00:07:21,107 --> 00:07:23,176 He said," You're still stupid. " And I'm like: 125 00:07:24,511 --> 00:07:28,081 "What kind of person said it to someone whose mother just died?" 126 00:07:28,148 --> 00:07:30,583 He doesn't, he doesn't know. He is a bad person. 127 00:07:30,650 --> 00:07:32,953 I am the winner of this story. 128 00:07:34,921 --> 00:07:36,523 And then I just lost it. 129 00:07:36,589 --> 00:07:39,759 And I went, "Oh, go on your car." 130 00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:44,497 I also don't know what that means, but I just... 131 00:07:45,565 --> 00:07:47,901 I have to keep going, like I know what I'm talking about 132 00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:50,470 Like, "Yeah, hold your penis. in the exhaust, buddy. 133 00:07:52,005 --> 00:07:54,040 134 00:07:54,107 --> 00:07:57,644 135 00:07:57,711 --> 00:08:00,947 And what, you...? You tell young girls You will put them in the film? 136 00:08:01,014 --> 00:08:03,817 You don't have a movie to put it in. You are a loser 137 00:08:03,883 --> 00:08:06,619 And the light turns green and he... 138 00:08:06,686 --> 00:08:08,688 The light turns green and he leaves. 139 00:08:08,755 --> 00:08:11,491 That's what you do in the green light, you go 140 00:08:14,060 --> 00:08:17,530 So, when he drove, he shouted, "You're crazy." And I like: 141 00:08:20,066 --> 00:08:23,636 And I shouted out of... From the passenger seat sunroof: 142 00:08:25,005 --> 00:08:28,808 "I'm not crazy. I'm meditating today, motherfucker." 143 00:08:31,711 --> 00:08:32,711 Thank you. 144 00:08:33,646 --> 00:08:35,815 Which is an ancient song from the Buddha. 145 00:08:35,882 --> 00:08:39,652 So... But then I thought... My adrenaline left, I trembled. 146 00:08:39,719 --> 00:08:42,956 And I went, "Damn, all this happened and I meditated today. What if I don't, you know?" 147 00:08:43,590 --> 00:08:44,858 And there are only a few lessons for you guys, don't call crazy women 148 00:08:48,228 --> 00:08:51,631 unless you want to see a woman go fucking crazy, okay Don't do it 149 00:08:51,698 --> 00:08:55,869 Save yourself. If you want to see... If you want to tell a woman that she is crazy, 150 00:08:55,935 --> 00:08:59,272 just call him calm 151 00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:00,240 That will only throw us away and everything is gone. Just leave, 152 00:09:00,306 --> 00:09:03,543 "Hey, you're really calm right now." 153 00:09:03,610 --> 00:09:05,578 154 00:09:06,246 --> 00:09:09,315 "Oh, thank you, a psychic told me I am very calm. Thank you. 155 00:09:10,784 --> 00:09:12,986 What do we fight for? I don't even know." 156 00:09:13,186 --> 00:09:16,322 So... I drive and I like: 157 00:09:16,589 --> 00:09:18,792 "Okay, take it easy. Adrenaline will go down." 158 00:09:19,692 --> 00:09:22,228 I'm heading for the next traffic light. The lamp of this lantern has never changed. 159 00:09:22,295 --> 00:09:25,965 The man is there again and I like it, "Okay, don't start anything, Jen. 160 00:09:26,032 --> 00:09:30,170 Stay in your path and, literally, don't become or look crazy." 161 00:09:30,770 --> 00:09:34,207 So, I use music and I'm having fun as usual. 162 00:09:34,274 --> 00:09:36,042 "Look at me, I'm not crazy at all. 163 00:09:36,109 --> 00:09:38,578 I'm not just shouting, "I'm meditating, motherfucker." 164 00:09:38,645 --> 00:09:39,846 I am fun and happy. " 165 00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:43,583 And he looked at me and he shouted at my car, 166 00:09:43,650 --> 00:09:46,152 " Hey... sorry about your mother. " 167 00:09:46,986 --> 00:09:49,122 And I like, " Oh, shit, I forgot my mother died. " 168 00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:50,189 So, you know... 169 00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,332 Suddenly I was annoyed, I went: 170 00:10:00,133 --> 00:10:04,904 "Oh, I know, this is a difficult morning. So many documents. " 171 00:10:04,971 --> 00:10:06,639 What? I don't know... what is that...? 172 00:10:07,373 --> 00:10:10,243 Why is there a document so fast, one hour? 173 00:10:11,211 --> 00:10:13,947 If it's real, he lives in Boston, I live on L.A. 174 00:10:14,247 --> 00:10:17,016 he died an hour ago, there is a document, do I have a fax machine 175 00:10:17,083 --> 00:10:19,252 It's like, "Someone dies, come on," do you know? 176 00:10:21,287 --> 00:10:22,889 So, he looked at me and left, 177 00:10:22,956 --> 00:10:26,226 "Okay, honey, we're a bit hot, but I hope you have a good day 178 00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:28,895 whatever you do And I'm like," You're human too. " 179 00:10:28,995 --> 00:10:31,998 And he leaves and I start to sob . I'm like, "Oh, my God. 180 00:10:32,365 --> 00:10:36,002 So full of emotion, you know. I don't know if it's only my mother or just... me... 181 00:10:38,905 --> 00:10:42,308 That's just kind of... You know, I've talked to two people this morning already 182 00:10:42,375 --> 00:10:44,978 and I will never do that, But it's meditation, 183 00:10:45,044 --> 00:10:46,379 it brings us together. 184 00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:48,648 This is very strong. " 185 00:10:48,848 --> 00:10:50,016 So, I parked the car. 186 00:10:50,083 --> 00:10:52,252 I am no longer crying, or excited, or crazy, or demeaning because I meditated. 187 00:10:52,318 --> 00:10:54,187 And I entered this meeting, introduced myself, we have chat, 188 00:10:54,254 --> 00:10:57,724 they will pay me, I will do the work, I nail it. 189 00:10:57,790 --> 00:11:00,894 I am like, "I shouldn't be allowed to do that. 190 00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:02,996 I shouldn't be allowed to be normal Because I act like a crazy person. " 191 00:11:03,229 --> 00:11:06,733 192 00:11:07,267 --> 00:11:09,702 Why don't they need to know what I do 193 00:11:09,769 --> 00:11:12,272 You are allowed to enter the building and be whatever you want even though you scream. I don't believe we do that, but we do it. 194 00:11:12,338 --> 00:11:15,742 I like, "But sex prostitutes are registered. Don't do it." 195 00:11:15,808 --> 00:11:18,678 I feel like, I have to... When I'm crazy like that, 196 00:11:18,745 --> 00:11:21,147 I have to be treated like registered sex offenders. 197 00:11:21,214 --> 00:11:23,683 Like, they have to go door to door. "I'm your neighbor. I have something in my past." Like, I have to go to a meeting, 198 00:11:24,784 --> 00:11:27,186 199 00:11:27,253 --> 00:11:30,156 200 00:11:30,223 --> 00:11:33,860 like, "Hello, I'm a good person, But I just shouted, 'I meditate today,' 201 00:11:33,927 --> 00:11:36,963 in the middle of the road and..." But I just escaped. 202 00:11:37,430 --> 00:11:39,766 It's like... If you ever go to a party 203 00:11:39,832 --> 00:11:43,436 and you are in the car with your partner and only... you hate them and you like: 204 00:11:43,836 --> 00:11:45,171 "The clothes are not suitable. 205 00:11:45,939 --> 00:11:48,808 What's funny you talk to? about how much you love your mother 206 00:11:48,875 --> 00:11:51,477 and she used to put you in these clothes. She's fucking sucked 207 00:11:51,744 --> 00:11:53,112 Teaching you how to dress. = Oh, yes, I will start with your mother. Oh, yes, me. Oh yes I am. 208 00:11:53,179 --> 00:11:56,883 209 00:11:56,950 --> 00:11:58,718 Oh no. No, don't even... No, no, no. 210 00:11:58,785 --> 00:12:01,120 What do you know? I want to go to this party for five minutes and I don't want to see you They are my friends, not mine. " 211 00:12:01,187 --> 00:12:04,123 Then you go in," Hey, I brought a muffin, "and you're like... 212 00:12:04,190 --> 00:12:07,060 You want to stay all night " Don't we have fun? " 213 00:12:10,096 --> 00:12:12,332 She's in the corner and your friend like: 214 00:12:12,398 --> 00:12:14,467 "Isn't he great?" And he is like, "He is very great." 215 00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:17,203 And you go back to the car and you forget about the fight from before 216 00:12:19,172 --> 00:12:22,342 and you like, "Isn't that a muffin the good one? I'm great." 217 00:12:22,408 --> 00:12:25,311 218 00:12:25,378 --> 00:12:29,315 And he just saw you like it, "Shut up, I know who you really are." 219 00:12:35,021 --> 00:12:38,257 I know you might be able to feel it I'm a little badass. Um... 220 00:12:39,525 --> 00:12:43,096 No... I didn't mean because of that story, But you can say that I have a tattoo. 221 00:12:43,162 --> 00:12:44,162 I know you can. 222 00:12:44,364 --> 00:12:45,365 Um... 223 00:12:45,431 --> 00:12:47,367 I have... Not everyone gets it, you know. 224 00:12:48,134 --> 00:12:50,436 There are badasses and the rest of you and, um... 225 00:12:51,004 --> 00:12:54,073 But I have a tattoo and I will only have it. 226 00:12:54,140 --> 00:12:56,509 I think the whole tattoo is very similar to children. 227 00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:58,511 Like, first of all, some people want it, 228 00:12:58,778 --> 00:13:01,914 some people don't want one, some people want a lot, like... 229 00:13:01,981 --> 00:13:05,051 And all their arms and it seems like a lot of work. But... 230 00:13:06,019 --> 00:13:09,422 But you go somewhere, you lie down, there is a lot of pain and you like: 231 00:13:09,489 --> 00:13:11,524 "God, I hope I like it, it's permanent." 232 00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:12,791 I see... 233 00:13:15,261 --> 00:13:19,032 So, I have a tattoo is not a child. 234 00:13:19,098 --> 00:13:22,168 And... So, for me, I'm one of the one-and-doner types. 235 00:13:22,235 --> 00:13:26,039 So, you know that my tattoo must be very meaningful right? If... 236 00:13:26,105 --> 00:13:29,809 If you have ever thought of getting a tattoo, you think about it for a while. 237 00:13:29,876 --> 00:13:33,479 "I don't want to get something stupid to have something that means something." 238 00:13:33,546 --> 00:13:37,216 And I have been waiting for my whole life to find something concise it means something that I can use my body permanently. 239 00:13:37,283 --> 00:13:40,053 I thought of something several years ago and I like: 240 00:13:40,119 --> 00:13:42,922 "Don't do it, give it another year 241 00:13:43,056 --> 00:13:44,524 and if you still think about it, do it." That's what I did. 242 00:13:44,590 --> 00:13:47,593 And I'm inspired by my friend who got a tattoo from his grandfather's name on his wrist and his birthday 243 00:13:47,860 --> 00:13:49,562 because he has an amazing story, so... 244 00:13:49,896 --> 00:13:53,299 245 00:13:53,366 --> 00:13:55,201 246 00:13:56,102 --> 00:13:58,571 I... my friend's grandfather survived the Holocaust 247 00:13:58,838 --> 00:13:59,839 because he is a Nazi. 248 00:14:00,273 --> 00:14:01,273 But... 249 00:14:01,407 --> 00:14:02,475 No, that's... alright. 250 00:14:04,444 --> 00:14:05,444 Sorry. 251 00:14:05,912 --> 00:14:06,912 That... 252 00:14:12,351 --> 00:14:14,253 That's just a fun joke. Not that... 253 00:14:17,623 --> 00:14:20,860 I don't make you wake up, Actually there is a story about my friend. 254 00:14:21,928 --> 00:14:23,596 I just have to give up because of him... 255 00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:25,998 My friend's grandfather survived the Holocaust And my friend, just like his father and his father's father, 256 00:14:26,065 --> 00:14:29,302 and like many of us in this country, suffer from depression and anxiety 257 00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:33,005 And the story he must know is is the story of the survival of his mind. 258 00:14:33,072 --> 00:14:37,310 259 00:14:37,577 --> 00:14:42,281 While in the camp, he will say a prayer of thanks to God 260 00:14:42,348 --> 00:14:45,184 and say, "I don't... If this should end this way, fine, but thank you for making me and not one of the bad guys. 261 00:14:45,585 --> 00:14:49,155 Thank you for pouring out love in my heart. " And it is mind-blowing. 262 00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:52,959 Of course you put that person's name on your wrist 263 00:14:53,025 --> 00:14:55,495 The most beautiful story I've ever heard. 264 00:14:55,561 --> 00:14:57,296 And I don't have someone in my family like that. 265 00:14:57,363 --> 00:14:59,532 ME... 266 00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:01,566 I come from a Catholic family from Boston 267 00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:08,107 and we don't talk to God like that. 268 00:15:08,174 --> 00:15:10,610 269 00:16:56,011 --> 00:15:15,615 We don't like God. We are angry with God and we think he is angry with us. 270 00:15:23,990 --> 00:15:27,960 Jennifer, why do you have gratitude? because God is so evil to you? 271 00:15:01,039 --> 00:15:31,697 Maybe he will think you like him there and he will hold you there. 272 00:15:33,299 --> 00:15:35,535 We don't bother God with all this gratitude 273 00:15:35,601 --> 00:15:37,170 unless something good happens. 274 00:15:37,570 --> 00:15:40,173 Nothing bad has happened in our family, but it can 275 00:15:40,239 --> 00:15:43,342 and we will complain beforehand and we will remain vigilant. 276 00:15:43,409 --> 00:15:47,146 So, there's no tattoo Whatever our family says. " 277 00:15:49,715 --> 00:15:51,083 So, I have to go somewhere else. 278 00:15:51,150 --> 00:15:54,720 So, I will show you my... my tattoo... and then I will explain it. 279 00:16:04,363 --> 00:16:08,067 It says, "JKL," which stands for JK life, 280 00:16:08,201 --> 00:16:10,102 who stands to stay alive, 281 00:16:10,269 --> 00:16:12,638 namely Matthew McConaughey's slogan. 282 00:16:16,175 --> 00:16:17,175 Thank you. 283 00:16:18,644 --> 00:16:22,715 This tattoo is not ironic at all. 284 00:16:24,050 --> 00:16:25,718 I mean with all my heart. 285 00:16:27,253 --> 00:16:30,022 Continue to live... inspire me. 286 00:16:30,990 --> 00:16:32,291 And I did not commit suicide. 287 00:16:35,127 --> 00:16:38,164 But I am a soul trapped in the body. I don't ask to be born 288 00:16:38,231 --> 00:16:41,300 and I'm afraid of death. And that's the nonsense that I live every day. 289 00:16:42,635 --> 00:16:43,503 And so on... 290 00:16:43,569 --> 00:16:45,338 Yes. 291 00:16:47,073 --> 00:16:51,410 I like what you like. "Yes, right, we are stuck!" 292 00:16:54,580 --> 00:16:58,518 Before you judge, or if you think I'm fair some Hollywood superficial people. No, no, no. 293 00:16:58,618 --> 00:17:00,586 There is a story behind "stay alive." 294 00:17:01,320 --> 00:17:04,624 Just like my friend has a story Behind his grandfather's tattoo. 295 00:17:06,125 --> 00:17:08,794 So, I'm at the nail salon and I'm having a bad day... 296 00:17:10,229 --> 00:17:13,266 but I don't know why I had a bad day. I just don't feel well. 297 00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:15,301 Physically, I feel fine. 298 00:17:15,501 --> 00:17:17,036 Mentally, not into it. 299 00:17:18,471 --> 00:17:20,473 So, I'm rolling People magazine 300 00:17:21,107 --> 00:17:23,242 and I saw an article about Matthew McConaughey. 301 00:17:25,077 --> 00:17:26,579 Well, he also had a hard day. 302 00:17:30,783 --> 00:17:33,386 I'm not sure why you laugh. This is very serious He is filming Dazed and Confused and he knows he will be a big star, 303 00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:39,191 But his father is dying, so, he is like: 304 00:17:39,425 --> 00:17:41,427 "Something good and something bad is happening together. Well, I guess I should stay alive." 305 00:17:41,827 --> 00:17:45,298 And then it becomes the slogan. 306 00:17:46,532 --> 00:17:49,368 And I see You are not moved to silence it because you are a Holocaust story. 307 00:17:50,836 --> 00:17:52,605 And it's okay. Different things for different people. 308 00:17:53,205 --> 00:17:55,575 309 00:17:55,641 --> 00:17:57,543 310 00:17:57,610 --> 00:18:00,212 311 00:18:02,515 --> 00:18:05,585 The thing about this tattoo is it in an uncomfortable place 312 00:18:05,651 --> 00:18:08,554 If my friend has a bad day, he can remind himself, 313 00:18:08,621 --> 00:18:11,457 "Not as bad as my grandfather has," by going like this 314 00:18:11,524 --> 00:18:12,725 I must like: 315 00:18:14,193 --> 00:18:18,197 "I will take this plane soon, . I have a bad day, 316 00:18:18,264 --> 00:18:21,434 and I need a reminder... Go... Please. Go. Continue." 317 00:18:25,771 --> 00:18:29,675 People say things about tattoos like, "You will regret it, it looks stupid." 318 00:18:29,742 --> 00:18:32,812 I'm like, "This looks stupid now, . I'm ready. Thank you." 319 00:18:38,150 --> 00:18:42,221 I understand, uh... I really got the tattoo on my birthday last year. 320 00:18:42,755 --> 00:18:46,125 Didn't do something fun for my birthday this year. Have a present from mom. 321 00:18:46,192 --> 00:18:49,528 That's not my only gift, But he handed me this piece of paper. 322 00:18:49,595 --> 00:18:50,630 Um... 323 00:18:51,430 --> 00:18:53,566 He did it now that he is getting older I don't know if he made a will, but it seems like he sent me an item 324 00:18:53,633 --> 00:18:56,702 and give me things whenever I meet him and that is always a dramatic speech. 325 00:18:56,769 --> 00:19:00,373 "Jennifer, I have to give this to you 326 00:19:00,439 --> 00:19:03,409 327 00:19:03,476 --> 00:19:06,612 because if I die How do you know I have it? " 328 00:19:08,481 --> 00:19:12,218 I went," I will search the house. Yeah, I'll get everything, don't worry. " 329 00:19:15,254 --> 00:19:17,623 But he gave me this thing and is as old as me. 330 00:19:17,690 --> 00:19:18,858 He is 42 years old. 331 00:19:18,924 --> 00:19:22,428 This is the piece of paper they gave him. When he left the hospital with me 332 00:19:22,495 --> 00:19:23,629 When I was a little baby 333 00:19:23,763 --> 00:19:27,366 I know, it's very funny. I weighed seven and a half pounds when I was born. So thin. Now I'm 42 years old and I've discussed this before, 334 00:19:30,903 --> 00:19:33,439 You know, when we talk about it Praising women and men too, 335 00:19:33,506 --> 00:19:37,410 336 00:19:37,476 --> 00:19:39,879 Tell their people to look young. This is a scary thing. 337 00:19:39,945 --> 00:19:43,282 Don't do this for people, okay? Stop praising people by saying, 338 00:19:43,416 --> 00:19:45,351 "You don't see your age." Do not do it. 339 00:19:45,418 --> 00:19:47,486 I don't like it When women in their 20s like: 340 00:19:47,553 --> 00:19:51,290 "Oh, my God, I think your age is old." Not praise. I'm in my 20s. 341 00:19:51,357 --> 00:19:54,326 I don't want to look like I have four annoying roommates and towels. 342 00:19:54,393 --> 00:19:56,429 I don't want to look like that. So... 343 00:19:56,495 --> 00:19:57,730 Thank you. 344 00:20:00,666 --> 00:20:03,969 I'm the only one I know that love is called "Mom." I like it. I... 345 00:20:04,236 --> 00:20:06,238 Whenever someone leaves, "Your change, madam," 346 00:20:06,305 --> 00:20:08,240 I like, "You know, thank you. I have a truly rich and multilevel life. Yes. I, um... 347 00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:12,545 No, I have time to tell you. 348 00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:14,847 I have a pager, sure, yes. ME... 349 00:20:16,782 --> 00:20:18,818 I was a cashier before scanning technology, made a change in my head 350 00:20:19,752 --> 00:20:22,855 And I was around Bruce Willis thought he had to record an R & B album. 351 00:20:23,456 --> 00:20:26,959 So, yes. 352 00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:28,226 Survivor, it looks a lot. Thank you. " 353 00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:30,930 After all, my mother gave me this. 354 00:20:31,764 --> 00:20:33,299 This is all they gave in the 70s when you had children, 355 00:20:34,300 --> 00:20:37,336 356 00:20:37,403 --> 00:20:40,473 the creature you have to take care of. Even 8-once-10. 357 00:20:40,539 --> 00:20:41,574 "Here it is. See you later." 358 00:20:42,808 --> 00:20:44,310 This I find very strange. 359 00:20:44,376 --> 00:20:49,515 It is said, "Friends and relatives, These people are interested in your baby." 360 00:20:50,783 --> 00:20:51,783 Oh, thank you. 361 00:20:53,819 --> 00:20:55,821 "And they want to hold and hug him." 362 00:20:56,555 --> 00:20:58,290 Oh, they don't have daughters in the 70s. 363 00:21:01,494 --> 00:21:04,363 "We must be careful with you to keep visitors away from your baby. 364 00:21:04,797 --> 00:21:08,033 A newborn is best kept as much as possible for himself." 365 00:21:08,734 --> 00:21:11,904 Different from now. I go to my friend's house, they are like: 366 00:21:11,971 --> 00:21:15,608 "Look at the baby, swing the baby, You can breastfeed the baby. It's okay." 367 00:21:17,576 --> 00:21:20,713 But in the 70s, like, "Joyce, don't you have a baby?" 368 00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:21,914 "Yeah, three months ago." 369 00:21:22,381 --> 00:21:24,316 "Where is he?" "He is in another room. 370 00:21:24,383 --> 00:21:26,018 We haven't brought it out yet. 371 00:21:26,285 --> 00:21:27,920 You know, they said, the doctor said 372 00:21:28,287 --> 00:21:30,689 too much seeing, and touching, and fussy, that... 373 00:21:30,790 --> 00:21:34,527 this can cause a sense of well-being, so we don't want it, we will just... 374 00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:35,661 don't look at him. " 375 00:21:35,728 --> 00:21:36,728 But... 376 00:21:37,530 --> 00:21:41,534 377 00:21:42,034 --> 00:21:43,903 378 00:21:43,969 --> 00:21:46,872 379 00:21:47,706 --> 00:21:48,706 380 00:21:48,808 --> 00:21:52,044 381 00:21:52,812 --> 00:21:56,715 382 00:21:58,918 --> 00:21:59,918 383 00:22:02,521 --> 00:22:04,723 384 00:22:06,058 --> 00:22:11,564 385 00:22:11,630 --> 00:22:13,732 386 00:22:13,799 --> 00:22:16,435 387 00:22:16,502 --> 00:22:19,905 388 00:22:19,972 --> 00:22:23,709 389 00:22:23,776 --> 00:22:27,046 390 00:22:29,515 --> 00:22:32,518 391 00:22:32,585 --> 00:22:36,689 392 00:22:36,755 --> 00:22:39,592 393 00:22:39,892 --> 00:22:42,027 394 00:22:43,495 --> 00:22:44,495 395 00:22:45,431 --> 00:22:46,732 Can't you feed the baby, 396 00:22:46,932 --> 00:22:50,402 put him in another room where no friends or family can see him... 397 00:22:51,537 --> 00:22:54,840 If five minutes pass, you can check and see if there are no pins inside him? 398 00:22:54,907 --> 00:22:57,387 If it's not there, go away, "I think he will cry for a while." 399 00:22:57,443 --> 00:22:59,478 But, no, this says three hours. 400 00:23:00,379 --> 00:23:03,749 You can see movies in three hours. But you don't have a VCR at that time. 401 00:23:03,816 --> 00:23:07,019 So, you have to go to the movies and you can come all the way back, 402 00:23:07,086 --> 00:23:09,755 and only 15 minutes left before you check your child 403 00:23:09,822 --> 00:23:13,726 "Should we check it out?" "It's said three hours. We don't want to smother." 404 00:23:13,792 --> 00:23:17,563 "You are right, we have 15. For me to drink, then we will enter, I will..." So... 405 00:23:19,498 --> 00:23:22,601 I basically knew that I had just been thrown into another room 406 00:23:22,701 --> 00:23:24,470 with pins sticking in I grew up. 407 00:23:25,938 --> 00:23:29,008 That's why I'm very comfortable alone and I do acupuncture. 408 00:23:29,508 --> 00:23:30,508 But, um... 409 00:23:31,844 --> 00:23:35,814 I travel alone, . I went to Italy alone this year. 410 00:23:35,881 --> 00:23:39,551 And that causes a lot of reactions from people You would think I said, "I started a race riot this year." 411 00:23:40,019 --> 00:23:43,022 412 00:23:43,088 --> 00:23:45,824 People like, "What? What are you doing?" 413 00:23:47,059 --> 00:23:50,195 People are very scared alone. 414 00:23:50,829 --> 00:23:53,832 Like, I like being alone. I think that's good. 415 00:23:53,899 --> 00:23:55,634 People like, "How do you do it?" 416 00:23:55,801 --> 00:23:59,605 How do I decide that I don't like others and make sure I'm not around? 417 00:23:59,672 --> 00:24:01,940 Very easy. People like: 418 00:24:02,007 --> 00:24:03,727 "I don't even want to go to the cinema." 419 00:24:03,876 --> 00:24:05,911 Why do you want to go? with others 420 00:24:05,978 --> 00:24:08,614 What can you do in the cinema with other people 421 00:24:08,681 --> 00:24:10,516 besides annoying them or something? 422 00:24:10,582 --> 00:24:12,785 Nothing can be done in theaters. 423 00:24:13,218 --> 00:24:14,219 And I'm an adult woman. 424 00:24:14,486 --> 00:24:18,123 I don't care if people think I'm a loser because I'm alone. 425 00:24:18,190 --> 00:24:21,727 I was very happy for this trip before people began to suppress it. 426 00:24:21,794 --> 00:24:23,896 My father said, "Are you not afraid of ISIS? 427 00:24:23,962 --> 00:24:25,864 ISIS is everywhere Fear of ISIS 428 00:24:25,931 --> 00:24:29,902 I am like," Who... I am a woman. I have no time to be afraid of ISIS. 429 00:24:29,968 --> 00:24:33,038 I'm just busy scared plain old man Are you kidding me? " 430 00:24:34,139 --> 00:24:38,077 You ever walked in front of a bar at 1 o'clock in the morning when dudes in a baseball cap came out? 431 00:24:38,143 --> 00:24:40,179 Fuck ISIS. ISIS is adorable. 432 00:24:41,146 --> 00:24:43,682 ISIS has a costume and a beard, looks like a bartender 433 00:24:43,749 --> 00:24:46,051 ISIS, they are not... I am not afraid at all. 434 00:24:46,218 --> 00:24:47,218 I see... 435 00:24:48,754 --> 00:24:51,824 I packed up for my trip and I thought like, "Where should I go?" 436 00:24:51,890 --> 00:24:55,928 Like, you know, I made a list, like, where I will see and what I will do 437 00:24:55,994 --> 00:24:59,498 Then I googled right at the last minute, Because I booked a trip to Venice. 438 00:24:59,565 --> 00:25:00,565 I just Googled, 439 00:25:00,632 --> 00:25:03,669 "What is the safest place in Italy? where are women not raped?" 440 00:25:03,736 --> 00:25:06,205 - Oh! - "Oh, Oh, he said rape." 441 00:25:06,271 --> 00:25:08,273 Let me fucking tell you something. 442 00:25:08,540 --> 00:25:11,340 Rape is there, I will talk about it. That's not a joke, it's a fact. 443 00:25:11,543 --> 00:25:13,779 I saw that because I didn't want to be raped. 444 00:25:13,846 --> 00:25:16,081 I will stop talking about rape When men stop raping. 445 00:25:16,148 --> 00:25:18,817 So, don't give me your anger, "Ooh, oh, oh!" 446 00:25:18,884 --> 00:25:20,119 I see... 447 00:25:22,287 --> 00:25:25,824 But it's true, there is a website for this Well, it's only yelp. 448 00:25:25,891 --> 00:25:30,028 There must be... There must be a "Relp" for like, "Where will I be raped? Help." 449 00:25:30,095 --> 00:25:31,597 So you go on that website. 450 00:25:31,797 --> 00:25:34,233 So... I feel very safe in Venice, 451 00:25:34,299 --> 00:25:37,770 and if anyone cares about me getting out of it Without injury, this is a very safe time. 452 00:25:37,836 --> 00:25:39,104 But people told me: 453 00:25:39,171 --> 00:25:42,007 "Don't you better wait for and go with men?" 454 00:25:42,775 --> 00:25:46,545 Not for security, it's just not fun to leave, I think, without a man. 455 00:25:46,779 --> 00:25:50,149 And I'm in a relationship and that's what surprised people again. 456 00:25:50,215 --> 00:25:51,850 "Why isn't he leaving?" 457 00:25:52,251 --> 00:25:55,587 Because I'm a comedian, I happened to be in Europe for some work too. 458 00:25:55,654 --> 00:25:58,257 I thought I'd go there to Italy for a few days, 459 00:25:58,323 --> 00:26:01,760 and he has a job and so he can't just do it. 460 00:26:01,827 --> 00:26:04,730 And they're like, "He's rude." I'm like, "No, no, he is just... 461 00:26:06,632 --> 00:26:09,101 He only has a different job, and I have free time, and... 462 00:26:09,168 --> 00:26:12,838 It will be in vain not to go to Italy, Only two hours left. " 463 00:26:12,905 --> 00:26:15,741 And they are like, "He must be by your side for this." 464 00:26:15,808 --> 00:26:18,110 I'm like, "This isn't chemo. I'm just on my way. 465 00:26:18,177 --> 00:26:19,678 I'm just on my way. 466 00:26:19,812 --> 00:26:22,114 Everything is good, they have food there, they have wine, 467 00:26:22,181 --> 00:26:25,350 they have people talking, Same as here, like here. " 468 00:26:27,286 --> 00:26:28,587 But I don't understand. Obviously, you sometimes want to Spend time with your partner. 469 00:26:28,654 --> 00:26:31,256 But the trip... Why risk the relationship? Why travel with a partner right? 470 00:26:31,323 --> 00:26:36,261 I go to Paris once with my husband. Guess what, now he's my ex-husband. I... 471 00:26:36,995 --> 00:26:40,732 You don't need to travel with your partner 472 00:26:42,067 --> 00:26:44,036 This is when you see it 24 hours a day 473 00:26:44,102 --> 00:26:47,673 and everything they do, you like: 474 00:26:47,739 --> 00:26:49,308 "Why are you walking on a plane? use your feet Allah! " 475 00:26:49,374 --> 00:26:53,612 476 00:26:56,281 --> 00:26:59,718 If you are traveling alone, you can eat with your hand 477 00:26:59,785 --> 00:27:02,321 I'm eating a salad. I will rub it. Very good. 478 00:27:05,123 --> 00:27:07,326 The only thing that sucked my trip, 479 00:27:07,960 --> 00:27:10,262 and I hate complaining about very special things to go to Italy alone, 480 00:27:10,329 --> 00:27:11,964 is that I ordered a walking tour Because I like that item. 481 00:27:12,664 --> 00:27:15,334 And I ordered a Venetian ghost tour, which I thought would be very pleasant. 482 00:27:15,968 --> 00:27:20,839 I am reading the website, people left comments 483 00:27:20,906 --> 00:27:23,408 "Very nice, Then the theater group jumped towards us 484 00:27:23,675 --> 00:27:26,378 and they tried to scare us 485 00:27:26,645 --> 00:27:28,080 486 00:27:28,146 --> 00:27:32,684 and we see sites where people Slaughtered back in the 1700s, 487 00:27:32,751 --> 00:27:34,253 We heard this crazy ghost story and we see this secret channel and this secret and keep it a secret. " 488 00:27:34,319 --> 00:27:37,422 And I like, " I want that, I want all the secrets. " 489 00:27:37,689 --> 00:27:40,092 So, I registered for it. 490 00:27:40,158 --> 00:27:41,293 And it was my last night in Venice. 491 00:27:42,828 --> 00:27:44,329 And at the last moment, I check my e-mail confirmation from the company 492 00:27:44,396 --> 00:27:48,901 And I accidentally ordered private tour 493 00:27:49,001 --> 00:27:51,270 And I was like, "No." Thank you for understanding. "I don't want to walk alone with someone during 90 minutes 494 00:27:51,336 --> 00:27:55,440 495 00:27:55,707 --> 00:27:58,143 496 00:27:58,210 --> 00:27:59,745 That's my worst dream. " 497 00:28:00,145 --> 00:28:03,815 And they made me meet him on the bridge, like a romance. 498 00:28:04,850 --> 00:28:07,352 And he saw me and he left, " Is it just you? " 499 00:28:07,419 --> 00:28:08,353 And I left," Yeah. " 500 00:28:08,420 --> 00:28:11,223 And he goes, "Oh, this breaks my heart." 501 00:28:11,290 --> 00:28:13,058 And he does this big thing. 502 00:28:14,126 --> 00:28:16,361 "I don't want to give you tour ghost story 503 00:28:16,428 --> 00:28:19,231 Oh, this is too sad. You are alone in Venice. 504 00:28:19,298 --> 00:28:23,769 Oh, no, no, no. We tour love stories. " 505 00:28:23,835 --> 00:28:26,171 I went," I want to see where people were killed 506 00:28:26,238 --> 00:28:29,241 Tell me about a baby who has died. I want to hear all kinds of crazy bullshit. " 507 00:28:32,010 --> 00:28:33,912 And he asked," Where is that person? " 508 00:28:33,979 --> 00:28:37,382 I don't know if he means my boyfriend or" guy "who dropped us off. I'm like," If I know where 'that guy' being, we will all be free, "right? and so... 509 00:28:37,449 --> 00:28:41,086 I don't know what he is talking about. He is very concerned, I have to explain, 510 00:28:42,821 --> 00:28:46,491 " I am... "You know, like all goes Tourism starts this way, you explain. You are in a relationship, very happy. You only take a time alone. Don't worry 511 00:28:47,125 --> 00:28:51,296 512 00:28:51,363 --> 00:28:53,232 513 00:28:53,298 --> 00:28:55,867 514 00:28:56,301 --> 00:28:58,337 Then I kneel and scream: 515 00:28:58,403 --> 00:29:00,038 "Why, God, I miss him! 516 00:29:00,105 --> 00:29:03,308 I have never seen a penis in a week! Oh God!" 517 00:29:04,977 --> 00:29:06,311 But then we started the tour. 518 00:29:08,113 --> 00:29:11,250 But when... Other problems... Not just being a woman with a man. 519 00:29:11,350 --> 00:29:14,519 If you are anyone with anyone, when you are alone on a walking tour, 520 00:29:14,786 --> 00:29:17,522 they can start taking advantage of you. So, he is like, "Miss, 521 00:29:17,789 --> 00:29:21,293 If you don't mind, I don't feel so much like walking tonight." 522 00:29:21,360 --> 00:29:23,128 I like, "You choose the wrong job." 523 00:29:23,195 --> 00:29:26,064 She's like, "I'm a little tired. 524 00:29:26,131 --> 00:29:30,102 This is a hard day. I am sad and very hot. 525 00:29:30,802 --> 00:29:32,204 Can we stand here? " 526 00:29:32,271 --> 00:29:33,205 So I said yes. 527 00:29:33,272 --> 00:29:35,240 I was standing under a bridge with a man 528 00:29:35,440 --> 00:29:38,043 while he told me That's not a ghost story 529 00:29:39,011 --> 00:29:41,046 for 90 minutes, okay 530 00:29:42,447 --> 00:29:44,416 And I know which is inevitable I know it will happen. He asked me... why am I in Italy? 531 00:29:44,483 --> 00:29:45,917 And I said, "For vacation." He said, "But why yourself?" 532 00:29:45,984 --> 00:29:48,987 I said, "Okay, I'm in London Doing some work and I come here. " 533 00:29:49,421 --> 00:29:51,990 534 00:29:52,057 --> 00:29:56,194 535 00:29:56,328 --> 00:29:57,829 "What work do you do?" 536 00:29:57,896 --> 00:29:59,965 And me... I don't want to tell him I'm a comedian. 537 00:30:00,399 --> 00:30:03,068 You guys are good for comedians When we are on stage, 538 00:30:03,135 --> 00:30:05,804 but in real life, People say bad things to us. 539 00:30:06,271 --> 00:30:09,174 They consider us comedians They are like, "You don't seem funny." 540 00:30:09,241 --> 00:30:11,510 "I will clean my colon, That's why." 541 00:30:12,010 --> 00:30:13,010 I see... 542 00:30:14,813 --> 00:30:17,949 I always lie every time I check-in to a hotel, enter Uber. 543 00:30:18,016 --> 00:30:19,985 "What brings you to the city?" Close them. 544 00:30:20,052 --> 00:30:22,554 "My friend has an abortion. I have to enter immediately. 545 00:30:28,193 --> 00:30:30,195 And that's a man so this is a strange procedure, 546 00:30:30,262 --> 00:30:32,397 so please leave me alone I don't want... " 547 00:30:33,899 --> 00:30:36,234 So, I told him I was a comedian and then he left: 548 00:30:36,868 --> 00:30:40,072 " Madam, this is not a provocation... 549 00:30:41,506 --> 00:30:44,209 but your life doesn't seem interesting enough 550 00:30:44,276 --> 00:30:46,511 that you have to travel the world and say. " 551 00:30:48,013 --> 00:30:49,147 And he's right, right? 552 00:30:53,285 --> 00:30:56,521 And that's how the tour ended did he say" not provocation " and then gave me a big old provocation. And then he did one nice thing. 553 00:30:56,888 --> 00:30:58,924 I try to see what's positive, I'm a meditator. 554 00:31:00,258 --> 00:31:01,860 555 00:31:01,927 --> 00:31:04,329 556 00:31:05,364 --> 00:31:08,400 Did he take me to an Italian restaurant. Obviously, I am in Italy. 557 00:31:08,900 --> 00:31:12,104 He took me to a restaurant, I don't need to say an Italian restaurant. 558 00:31:12,170 --> 00:31:14,206 "Is this an Italian restaurant? or what?" 559 00:31:14,272 --> 00:31:15,440 So, he took me... 560 00:31:18,143 --> 00:31:20,379 He took me to a restaurant. He doesn't sit with me, 561 00:31:20,445 --> 00:31:21,580 he just brought me there 562 00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:24,916 And I'm actually very grateful because on the Grand Canal and if you've been anywhere, 563 00:31:24,983 --> 00:31:27,018 You sometimes don't know what the original restaurant is and what are cheap tourist attractions. 564 00:31:27,085 --> 00:31:30,389 So, I said, "I will never choose this place. 565 00:31:30,455 --> 00:31:32,357 566 00:31:32,424 --> 00:31:35,026 567 00:31:35,093 --> 00:31:37,996 I don't know by seeing in a restaurant on the Grand Canal 568 00:31:38,063 --> 00:31:41,333 what is authentic and what is not, So, thank you for bringing me here. " 569 00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:44,269 Now he stands on my desk, Waiter brings wine, 570 00:31:44,336 --> 00:31:48,440 Things start happening and he says, " Can I tell you one more story, then? " 571 00:31:49,141 --> 00:31:50,275 I go," Alright. " 572 00:31:50,342 --> 00:31:53,178 He hasn't told a ghost story yet, . So I'm like," Maybe this is it. " 573 00:31:53,245 --> 00:31:58,984 He said," You remind me, There is a story about perception. 574 00:31:59,451 --> 00:32:03,255 You bring up You don't know What restaurant is good based on appearance 575 00:32:03,488 --> 00:32:04,623 Isn't that alive? 576 00:32:05,957 --> 00:32:09,194 You don't know someone or someone, is only based on seeing them, 577 00:32:09,261 --> 00:32:10,262 what is in their souls There may be a man and he is fun and he walks and he tells his story. 578 00:32:10,462 --> 00:32:15,200 But maybe he just went home and he killed himself. " 579 00:32:16,935 --> 00:32:19,938 " That's all? " He said," Yes. " 580 00:32:27,312 --> 00:32:29,281 I went," Alright, good night. Thank you for the tour. " 581 00:32:29,347 --> 00:32:32,184 What...? 582 00:32:35,053 --> 00:32:36,053 " Keep on living. " 583 00:32:36,555 --> 00:32:37,556 I'm upset because he never told his horror story. 584 00:32:41,293 --> 00:32:43,628 He only told me that love story. I'm like," Oh, that's how... I do not... 585 00:32:43,695 --> 00:32:47,065 586 00:32:47,132 --> 00:32:50,302 Not everyone is meant for this world. Whatever he wants, I don't care. " 587 00:32:51,036 --> 00:32:54,372 But I thought, maybe I should complain. Like, I don't want to get him fired, 588 00:32:54,439 --> 00:32:56,441 but I want to complain and get my money back 589 00:32:56,508 --> 00:32:59,344 and then just have the manager just say it to everyone, 590 00:32:59,411 --> 00:33:02,247 "Hey, you know, we can't play with tours. 591 00:33:02,314 --> 00:33:06,117 Give people what they want. "So, maybe, What if I call the manager now? 592 00:33:06,184 --> 00:33:07,986 What if he's like," Sergio? 593 00:33:08,220 --> 00:33:10,088 He didn't meet you at the bridge at 7 o'clock. " 594 00:33:10,155 --> 00:33:11,223 I will be like," He did it. " 595 00:33:11,289 --> 00:33:14,459 He will be like, "Oh, no, Mom, At 6:30 he killed himself." 596 00:33:14,526 --> 00:33:18,196 I will be like, "Oh, my God, . It's the biggest ghost tour ever!" 597 00:33:21,299 --> 00:33:25,337 Yes. Now you like suicide jokes If it's been a little hit there, right? 598 00:33:28,707 --> 00:33:31,576 So, you know, I'm a hypochondriac, but not... 599 00:33:32,410 --> 00:33:33,645 I didn't find anything. 600 00:33:33,712 --> 00:33:37,015 It's just that when something happens, I think it's worse than that, right? 601 00:33:37,082 --> 00:33:39,718 I had an incident with my doctor six months ago... 602 00:33:40,452 --> 00:33:44,189 Where he says I can't go back for a year even if I'm really dying. 603 00:33:45,323 --> 00:33:48,260 Because I have like hypochondriacal episodes... 604 00:33:48,527 --> 00:33:49,694 and make my own ass. 605 00:33:49,761 --> 00:33:53,331 Now, I want to tell the story, but it will be filmed... 606 00:33:54,199 --> 00:33:57,035 and now the cliche will be stuck on me. 607 00:33:57,736 --> 00:33:59,771 Because the story also concerns my period. 608 00:34:01,172 --> 00:34:04,042 And people have problems When women talk about their menstruation. 609 00:34:04,376 --> 00:34:05,677 "People." Male 610 00:34:05,744 --> 00:34:06,778 I see... 611 00:34:08,547 --> 00:34:12,384 the general wisdom that people say is not cute women 612 00:34:12,450 --> 00:34:15,220 Okay, good. I can not do anything. 613 00:34:15,287 --> 00:34:18,390 If you don't think I'm funny, check other women, right? 614 00:34:18,823 --> 00:34:20,592 "Woman" is not a type of comedy. 615 00:34:20,825 --> 00:34:22,394 "Woman" is the type of person. 616 00:34:23,261 --> 00:34:25,664 I think women are people, I'm not sure. Anyway, but... 617 00:34:26,398 --> 00:34:29,734 Let's distinguish why it's so difficult to talk about a period 618 00:34:30,068 --> 00:34:33,305 I think sometimes people don't know how many periods 619 00:34:33,371 --> 00:34:36,207 So, a man doesn't want to hear it because he's like: 620 00:34:36,274 --> 00:34:38,209 "I feel stupid, I don't know what that is." 621 00:34:38,276 --> 00:34:40,645 And it doesn't matter. They also didn't explain it to us. 622 00:34:42,480 --> 00:34:45,183 I am 11 years old, my mother said, "You will get your period." 623 00:34:45,250 --> 00:34:47,185 "What is that?" "The thing you will get." 624 00:34:47,252 --> 00:34:50,322 "When?" "Anytime between now and the next seven years." "Oh, God." 625 00:34:50,388 --> 00:34:53,592 And then you just walk to school like, "Will get my menstruation 626 00:34:53,658 --> 00:34:56,728 What is my period? Get out of here Do I have it Can anyone see?" 627 00:34:56,795 --> 00:34:58,597 So, this... This... 628 00:35:00,465 --> 00:35:02,767 This is the period. Let's start with education and arrive at a pleasant story about my hypochondria and menstruation right? 629 00:35:02,834 --> 00:35:06,237 We start. Who knows does not know what the period is, 630 00:35:06,304 --> 00:35:08,840 Every month a woman takes off the interior from the lining of her uterus 631 00:35:09,274 --> 00:35:13,545 632 00:35:13,612 --> 00:35:16,681 because she's not pregnant, because she's a dirty and dirty prostitute... 633 00:35:18,316 --> 00:35:21,186 who do not do one thing God placed it on earth to do, 634 00:35:21,519 --> 00:35:22,754 that makes babies 635 00:35:22,821 --> 00:35:25,123 And that's three- to five days of punishment. 636 00:35:25,190 --> 00:35:27,692 So... that's a period. 637 00:35:27,759 --> 00:35:28,759 Now... 638 00:35:31,363 --> 00:35:33,298 I think men can handle that fact right? 639 00:35:35,700 --> 00:35:37,669 And I'm not making fun of men. I mean, I... 640 00:35:38,236 --> 00:35:42,641 The problem... Men don't mean to us about our period when we talk about it. 641 00:35:42,707 --> 00:35:45,377 They never mean anything to us. They don't want to hear it. 642 00:35:46,344 --> 00:35:48,847 And I understand that because the world serves you 643 00:35:48,913 --> 00:35:52,217 and you don't need to hear anything that you don't know. 644 00:35:52,784 --> 00:35:55,920 And it must be very scary when you have to, so, we have to... 645 00:35:56,621 --> 00:35:58,223 We must be kind to men. 646 00:36:01,459 --> 00:36:04,462 I don't like the old hacker, "If men have menstruation, 647 00:36:04,529 --> 00:36:07,932 they will be like, 'Yeah, blood everywhere. Will name the bar after that. Yes...'" 648 00:36:08,199 --> 00:36:09,199 You know. 649 00:36:10,735 --> 00:36:14,239 Maybe that's right, maybe not. But I don't know if it's true 650 00:36:14,305 --> 00:36:16,608 because if men are the people who get their periods, 651 00:36:17,175 --> 00:36:19,811 then women will become people don't get their periods 652 00:36:19,878 --> 00:36:22,847 So, that's not fair. And I know what I am like 653 00:36:23,181 --> 00:36:26,184 when I don't understand many things in a man's body. Know what I mean? 654 00:36:26,251 --> 00:36:29,287 Like, "Why do you have a ball?" "Because I have it." "Get rid of it." 655 00:36:29,354 --> 00:36:31,890 Like, I'm not necessarily good. 656 00:36:32,891 --> 00:36:36,761 So, I want to know what I will be like later If I have a girlfriend who gets menstruation 657 00:36:36,828 --> 00:36:39,297 because men get menstruation and I have never had it. 658 00:36:39,431 --> 00:36:42,934 If I'm having dinner... and my girlfriend out of the bathroom and she's like: 659 00:36:43,201 --> 00:36:45,470 "Uh, Jen... we have to go." 660 00:36:47,238 --> 00:36:49,307 "Jonathan, we didn't order it 661 00:36:49,374 --> 00:36:53,712 "Jen, I just had a period a day early and I wear white pants. 662 00:36:53,778 --> 00:36:54,946 We have to go. We have to go." 663 00:36:55,680 --> 00:36:57,916 "Uh, what do you mean You get your menstruation a day early? Doesn't that happen on the same day every month? " "No, this is hormonal, 664 00:36:57,982 --> 00:37:01,586 it's not regular I can't control it . " 665 00:37:01,653 --> 00:37:03,388 "Oh, I can't control my body. 666 00:37:03,455 --> 00:37:05,256 Oh, that hormone makes me do it. 667 00:37:05,323 --> 00:37:06,958 Come on, you can control it." 668 00:37:07,225 --> 00:37:08,493 "Jen, I can't." "Do they have tampons in the bathroom?" 669 00:37:10,395 --> 00:37:12,731 670 00:37:12,797 --> 00:37:14,799 "No, they came out and I... So, we have to go." 671 00:37:15,867 --> 00:37:17,902 "Do you have a tampon in your wallet, Jonathan?" 672 00:37:21,406 --> 00:37:22,440 "No, I forgot." 673 00:37:22,574 --> 00:37:25,310 "Jonathan, how many times have I told you be a damn man 674 00:37:25,376 --> 00:37:29,414 and keep a tampon in your bag in case... you get your initial period. 675 00:37:29,481 --> 00:37:31,816 And why wear white pants close to this week 676 00:37:31,883 --> 00:37:33,418 from period do you expect? 677 00:37:33,485 --> 00:37:36,588 God, what...? How long has it been Have you got this, 20 years now? 678 00:37:37,889 --> 00:37:41,760 Why don't you do this, Jonathan? You may go. I eat here 679 00:37:41,826 --> 00:37:44,696 We already have this reservation for two weeks. Go away, I live Leave. Tie your jacket around your waist, Jonathan. Everyone can see your menstruation. " 680 00:37:45,363 --> 00:37:49,801 Then I call my friend, " I'm in the restaurant alone. 681 00:37:54,439 --> 00:37:56,674 Yes. But Jonathan gets menstruation. 682 00:37:56,941 --> 00:37:58,643 No, of course not. 683 00:37:59,511 --> 00:38:00,512 He doesn't know it will come, no. He never knew Oh, like Jonathan has a tampon. You are crazy? 684 00:38:00,979 --> 00:38:03,381 We are talking about Jonathan. He is... I don't know if I can be with him 685 00:38:04,349 --> 00:38:06,451 686 00:38:06,518 --> 00:38:09,888 687 00:38:09,954 --> 00:38:14,325 Because if he can't plan for himself, then, How, how can he plan for me, you know? " 688 00:38:15,960 --> 00:38:18,897 So, maybe like a woman . If men get their periods. This is what happened to me. 689 00:38:18,963 --> 00:38:20,365 Now, my menstruation comes on the same day every month. Never before, it's never too late . I'm not cramped. Thank you. 690 00:38:21,299 --> 00:38:24,636 I see... 691 00:38:24,702 --> 00:38:27,705 One morning... When I was 41 and half years old 692 00:38:27,906 --> 00:38:28,906 and really felt it... just thinking about it, 693 00:38:31,376 --> 00:38:34,913 God... almost 50. 694 00:38:34,979 --> 00:38:37,982 695 00:38:38,449 --> 00:38:40,451 696 00:38:40,752 --> 00:38:44,355 I mean, not really, but... closer than me when I was 13 years old. 697 00:38:44,923 --> 00:38:45,923 Right? 698 00:38:46,825 --> 00:38:49,494 I woke up in the morning and I went to the women's room. 699 00:38:49,961 --> 00:38:51,830 There are no women's rooms in my house. 700 00:38:51,896 --> 00:38:56,734 It's not like a woman, a man, a wheelchair, You know, this is... I'm leaving... I'll urinate. 701 00:38:58,336 --> 00:39:01,506 And I saw my underwear and there were a few drops of fresh blood. 702 00:39:02,073 --> 00:39:05,877 Now, again... it's two weeks from when I should have menstruation. 703 00:39:06,077 --> 00:39:08,546 And this is Not blood that resembles the lining of the uterus. 704 00:39:09,814 --> 00:39:13,551 This is fresh blood pricking your fingers. It really looks like blood... 705 00:39:14,519 --> 00:39:17,021 that was owned by my roommate years and years ago. 706 00:39:18,656 --> 00:39:21,693 When I was young with a roommate in Brooklyn 707 00:39:21,759 --> 00:39:22,861 and he has a dying cat. 708 00:39:23,962 --> 00:39:26,130 And the cat dragged its body on the floor 709 00:39:26,397 --> 00:39:29,968 When a small drop of blood comes out because the cat's kidney fails. 710 00:39:31,002 --> 00:39:33,805 That's right. And my roommate Must put the cat in a cage 711 00:39:33,938 --> 00:39:35,607 and the cat was revealed that day, 712 00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:38,743 The same day drops of blood appear in the morning 713 00:39:39,477 --> 00:39:43,882 And I saw myself and I left, "Today is the day I will be dropped. I don't have a human-sized cage and I live alone. 714 00:39:46,551 --> 00:39:49,020 715 00:39:50,488 --> 00:39:52,790 I know if I don't start a family this will happen, 716 00:39:52,857 --> 00:39:55,593 but I have to lower myself. 717 00:39:55,660 --> 00:39:58,029 I will call the vet and I will make an appointment. " 718 00:39:59,163 --> 00:40:01,032 Because I know it's internal bleeding. 719 00:40:01,099 --> 00:40:03,701 My kidney failed. I have internal bleeding. But before I panicked, I checked my vagina for glass. 720 00:40:03,768 --> 00:40:06,638 So I just wanted to make sure... Because I often take sleeping pills, You can sleep in bed. 721 00:40:06,704 --> 00:40:08,506 I want to make sure that in the middle of the night 722 00:40:10,675 --> 00:40:13,778 I don't start walking in sleep, then enter the bar fight, 723 00:40:13,845 --> 00:40:16,447 724 00:40:16,514 --> 00:40:18,917 725 00:40:18,983 --> 00:40:22,053 break the bottle, and then put it in me and you go, "Come on me!" 726 00:40:22,120 --> 00:40:23,120 I see... 727 00:40:23,922 --> 00:40:27,125 I called a friend, I like it, "Can I fight with my vagina?" 728 00:40:27,191 --> 00:40:29,794 They are like, "I don't think so." I'm like, "thank you 729 00:40:31,596 --> 00:40:34,132 The bad news is at that time I have to put it down today. 730 00:40:34,832 --> 00:40:37,702 This is internal bleeding. I'll call my doctor." 731 00:40:37,802 --> 00:40:41,039 So, I call I said, "I have to go in. I have internal bleeding." 732 00:40:41,673 --> 00:40:44,208 I got there, he put me in the stirrup, the stupid one 733 00:40:44,475 --> 00:40:48,046 I am like, "This is not a period. Perform an x-ray. I have internal bleeding. 734 00:40:48,112 --> 00:40:50,682 My kidney failed. Fast Come on." 735 00:40:51,082 --> 00:40:53,518 He looked up and left, "Jen, this is your period." 736 00:40:53,584 --> 00:40:56,054 I go, "No, no." And he goes, "Yes, right." 737 00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:59,657 "It shouldn't be here two weeks." He left, "Two weeks early." 738 00:40:59,724 --> 00:41:02,760 I go, "I want a second opinion." 739 00:41:02,827 --> 00:41:05,129 He left, "What do you think?" 740 00:41:05,563 --> 00:41:07,799 I said, "I still think this is internal bleeding." 741 00:41:07,865 --> 00:41:10,535 And he said, "Not so." And I said, "How do you know?" 742 00:41:10,735 --> 00:41:13,871 And he said, "Because you see blood outside." 743 00:41:15,540 --> 00:41:18,509 "Oh, that's really amazing. I never thought about that. 744 00:41:18,576 --> 00:41:20,078 That's why people die from internal bleeding, 745 00:41:20,878 --> 00:41:23,014 because they don't see the blood. 746 00:41:23,081 --> 00:41:24,983 Okay, I understand. = = = Good. Alright. I'm stupid. " 747 00:41:25,049 --> 00:41:26,818 He looked at me and said, "Are you okay?" 748 00:41:26,884 --> 00:41:28,653 And I left, "I don't think so, no, I don't..." 749 00:41:29,654 --> 00:41:31,231 And like a child given a toothbrush by a dentist, he just gave me a tampon and like, "Get out of here." And, um... 750 00:41:31,255 --> 00:41:33,891 751 00:41:34,592 --> 00:41:38,863 752 00:41:38,930 --> 00:41:40,832 753 00:41:42,600 --> 00:41:47,238 Now, the worst part is that I subscribe to tampons on Amazon. 754 00:41:48,039 --> 00:41:53,077 And I keep forgetting to cancel it, So every month, I get so many tampons. 755 00:41:53,144 --> 00:41:56,614 And there is a closet with them. They will live longer than me. 756 00:41:57,048 --> 00:42:00,918 I will not... I will experience menopause before they I will die. 757 00:42:00,985 --> 00:42:03,955 One day I will be in a chair, no blood is left in my body, like: 758 00:42:04,022 --> 00:42:06,991 "I have never even seen blood on my teeth, especially this." 759 00:42:07,725 --> 00:42:09,794 I don't have children, I don't have anyone to give them. 760 00:42:09,861 --> 00:42:13,297 I'm a weird woman on Halloween every year where it's like, "Trick or treat." 761 00:42:13,564 --> 00:42:16,134 And I'm like, "You will be a woman someday. Yes, take this." 762 00:42:16,734 --> 00:42:20,638 Even you, little boy, you never know. Take it, take it. Take it, everyone. " 763 00:42:22,306 --> 00:42:26,110 It's amazing what we don't know about our bodies, we don't think of many things. Like, I wasn't taught anything about my body growing up. 764 00:42:26,177 --> 00:42:29,280 I didn't lose my virginity until I basically almost 22 years, 765 00:42:29,547 --> 00:42:33,184 which I have a lot of shame about. I think it's a bit old, rather tacky. 766 00:42:33,251 --> 00:42:37,221 767 00:42:37,321 --> 00:42:41,225 And even the person I lost my virginity didn't know that he took it, 768 00:42:41,292 --> 00:42:46,030 Because I have to lie that I lost it at age 16 under the creeping willow tree. 769 00:42:46,097 --> 00:42:48,699 You are really detailed when you lie about things, don't you? 770 00:42:50,001 --> 00:42:54,705 I lost my virginity at the age of 21, but, like, almost 22, like, 21 and 11 months. 771 00:42:55,306 --> 00:42:58,709 And it's not because I'm a shy person. I want to lose my virginity. 772 00:42:58,776 --> 00:43:01,913 It has always been the purpose of my life Ever since I was little. 773 00:43:02,080 --> 00:43:04,849 Just grow up someday and lose my virginity. 774 00:43:05,616 --> 00:43:08,086 And the thing that stopped me... That is a Catholic thing. 775 00:43:08,152 --> 00:43:11,889 Well, first of all, I don't understand what sex is right? 776 00:43:11,956 --> 00:43:13,925 I mean, I have sex education, as we all do. 777 00:43:13,991 --> 00:43:17,628 They don't, like, teach you how to make love, it's like... 778 00:43:18,863 --> 00:43:22,633 They never say anything, like, _ make love and sensuality, and... 779 00:43:22,800 --> 00:43:24,268 There have never been gay people involved. 780 00:43:24,335 --> 00:43:27,071 It's only men lying next to a woman, they are pregnant I'm like, "Why does someone do that?" Etc... 781 00:43:27,138 --> 00:43:29,340 782 00:43:30,174 --> 00:43:32,176 A single bed for life, right? And so on... 783 00:43:33,211 --> 00:43:37,281 Everything we have in sex education for girls, we have large posters of the fallopian tubes. 784 00:43:37,615 --> 00:43:39,350 And I'm like, "Are they inside me?" 785 00:43:39,684 --> 00:43:43,621 They look giant, like, "Why not? Out my mouth?" It's like... 786 00:43:46,190 --> 00:43:49,794 And there is only a vagina there with eggs here 787 00:43:49,861 --> 00:43:51,729 Looks like a ball in a catching glove. 788 00:43:51,796 --> 00:43:54,699 It seems like the eggs are always there, Like, "Let's play the ball. 789 00:43:54,765 --> 00:43:57,034 Impressing me Come on, we'll go around the grounds." 790 00:43:57,101 --> 00:44:02,406 And then for boys, they only have sperm posters. 791 00:44:03,274 --> 00:44:04,308 And they taught us 792 00:44:04,375 --> 00:44:09,247 in one drop of semen There are billions and billions of sperm. 793 00:44:10,915 --> 00:44:12,783 I'm like, "Alright." That's all I remember. 794 00:44:12,850 --> 00:44:14,986 Because I have to be a teenager, My mom is like: 795 00:44:15,119 --> 00:44:17,421 "Never have sex, You will get pregnant at any time." 796 00:44:17,788 --> 00:44:21,859 And I'm like, but I think he's right Because I rethink the two signs, 797 00:44:22,059 --> 00:44:26,297 eggs waiting and ready and then billions and billions of sperm. 798 00:44:26,364 --> 00:44:30,134 What are the possibilities? One billion one. You will have a baby right? 799 00:44:30,201 --> 00:44:33,237 I'm like, "Why do women only have it? Why aren't they like:" 800 00:44:34,438 --> 00:44:37,308 Like, why not a baby? just, like, spilled from everyone? 801 00:44:37,375 --> 00:44:40,912 Like, there are billions and billions of sperm and one egg. 802 00:44:42,079 --> 00:44:45,883 So, I don't want... I don't want to, You know, losing my virginity is so fast. 803 00:44:45,950 --> 00:44:49,020 That is the fault of the Catholic Church. Like, now, I'm cool with Jesus. 804 00:44:49,086 --> 00:44:52,990 I know Jesus doesn't mind if I have sex Because Jesus loves prostitutes, right? 805 00:44:53,424 --> 00:44:54,292 It's in the Bible. 806 00:44:54,358 --> 00:44:57,161 He gets along with prostitutes, they are his favorite people. 807 00:44:57,228 --> 00:45:00,231 When he was fed up with the apostles, "Where is my whore?" 808 00:45:00,298 --> 00:45:01,198 "Here." 809 00:45:01,265 --> 00:45:04,201 He will be like, "We will not write about you in the Bible." 810 00:45:04,268 --> 00:45:05,937 And then he befriended them. 811 00:45:06,003 --> 00:45:09,440 So, I know that once I have sex, I will only confess to Jesus, 812 00:45:09,707 --> 00:45:13,044 "I have sex." He will be like, "I like that." I will be like, "just tell you." 813 00:45:13,110 --> 00:45:15,046 And that will be fine. 814 00:45:16,047 --> 00:45:17,982 What I feared was pregnant. 815 00:45:18,049 --> 00:45:21,452 Obviously, I don't want to be a teenage mother or mother's age. 816 00:45:21,719 --> 00:45:24,288 I know if I'm pregnant, I have to have an abortion and I am very afraid of abortion because of the church 817 00:45:24,355 --> 00:45:27,858 818 00:45:27,925 --> 00:45:30,461 Not because of Jesus, but because of the pastor in the church. 819 00:45:30,728 --> 00:45:34,231 Every single priest's sermon In my church is about abortion. 820 00:45:34,298 --> 00:45:36,901 Even though it's not in the Bible that day, you know 821 00:45:36,968 --> 00:45:39,136 They will be like, "Merry Christmas, everyone. 822 00:45:39,236 --> 00:45:41,505 And we are here because Mary has a baby. 823 00:45:41,772 --> 00:45:44,875 She keeps it even though she doesn't know who gave it to her And we will celebrate Mary. 824 00:45:44,942 --> 00:45:47,244 = = He doesn't have an abortion 825 00:45:47,311 --> 00:45:48,512 like you girls who go to clubs and use it as a family planning device. Then if you have an abortion, You go to hell 826 00:45:48,779 --> 00:45:51,482 If you know someone It's abortion, you go to hell . 827 00:45:51,749 --> 00:45:53,851 828 00:45:53,918 --> 00:45:56,854 829 00:45:56,921 --> 00:45:59,991 Guys, don't worry We will be your high-five. You have a pregnant woman. 830 00:46:00,057 --> 00:46:01,926 But the women go to hell. " 831 00:46:01,993 --> 00:46:04,161 And I like, " I don't want to go to hell. " 832 00:46:04,261 --> 00:46:06,130 I decided I would never get pregnant 833 00:46:06,197 --> 00:46:08,499 and the easiest way to do that is to never have sex. 834 00:46:08,766 --> 00:46:11,302 And I'm right really don't understand How abortion is. I don't know It's a safe medical procedure 835 00:46:11,369 --> 00:46:14,205 that prevents pregnancy from being pregnant 836 00:46:14,271 --> 00:46:17,308 I thought you took the baby full time and then at the doctor's office , they, like, shoot in the head. 837 00:46:17,375 --> 00:46:19,510 838 00:46:19,777 --> 00:46:22,780 839 00:46:22,847 --> 00:46:24,915 You know, I like, "I didn't do that." 840 00:46:27,885 --> 00:46:29,553 I don't judge, but I don't do it. 841 00:46:33,357 --> 00:46:35,559 So, it's not sex... 842 00:46:36,961 --> 00:46:39,964 Instead of sex, I am a girl who likes to be touched. 843 00:46:40,031 --> 00:46:42,133 I like to grope. Loved? 844 00:46:42,199 --> 00:46:44,235 I still like it. I like fingers. 845 00:46:44,902 --> 00:46:48,172 I bring back the fingering. So fabulous. Do it for everyone. 846 00:46:48,239 --> 00:46:51,809 This is not just for... Not only that for children. It's like sugar cereal. 847 00:46:51,876 --> 00:46:53,878 Adults can enjoy it too. This is amazing. 848 00:46:54,311 --> 00:46:57,148 You will go directly to the source. The greatest feeling on Earth 849 00:46:57,214 --> 00:47:01,185 So... I have a beautiful girlfriend my usual finger. 850 00:47:01,252 --> 00:47:03,587 And the first time I got a finger... My God. 851 00:47:05,222 --> 00:47:06,824 I mean, I touched myself before, 852 00:47:06,891 --> 00:47:09,894 but when you can go hands free, It's like, "Whee!" Very nice. 853 00:47:11,128 --> 00:47:14,131 And the feeling is so strong that after I feel, 854 00:47:14,198 --> 00:47:17,068 every time after that that I don't get a finger, 855 00:47:17,134 --> 00:47:20,271 I have deep and dark depression. 856 00:47:21,439 --> 00:47:23,841 That's why when you see it Goth girls walk around, 857 00:47:23,908 --> 00:47:26,377 they are not trying to get attention, they are angry 858 00:47:26,444 --> 00:47:29,947 They have felt once and have never been touched since. 859 00:47:30,014 --> 00:47:33,451 They are like, "It's very dark It's terrible I don't feel anything." 860 00:47:33,517 --> 00:47:34,852 So, anyway... 861 00:47:36,187 --> 00:47:39,090 My boyfriend usually goes first to me Because he's a good person. 862 00:47:39,156 --> 00:47:41,292 But this is once I want to reply. 863 00:47:41,358 --> 00:47:43,260 So I took my two dry hands, 864 00:47:43,327 --> 00:47:48,065 and I rubbed his penis up and down like you did, and almost burned. 865 00:47:48,466 --> 00:47:50,267 And... 866 00:47:52,002 --> 00:47:55,005 So, like a skilled firefighter, He grabs it like a hose 867 00:47:55,072 --> 00:47:58,142 and like, "I understand this," you know. 868 00:47:58,209 --> 00:48:01,045 And he came in his hand like a 17 year old boy, 869 00:48:01,112 --> 00:48:03,013 wiping it on his shirt in the basement 870 00:48:03,080 --> 00:48:06,050 and then he enters to return the favor 871 00:48:06,117 --> 00:48:07,284 Everything I saw on that finger... 872 00:48:07,351 --> 00:48:09,420 I can't see it, But I know it's there. 873 00:48:09,587 --> 00:48:11,589 Billions and billions of sperm. 874 00:48:12,590 --> 00:48:13,624 I don't want to be like: 875 00:48:13,891 --> 00:48:16,103 "Can you wash your hands? I'm not ready to be a mother." 876 00:48:16,127 --> 00:48:17,661 Because it's tacky, right? 877 00:48:17,928 --> 00:48:20,397 Then I like, "You can't get pregnant from your fingers. 878 00:48:20,464 --> 00:48:23,300 They must have told us. They must have said it at school. 879 00:48:23,934 --> 00:48:27,371 Unless they don't know what this is, and we just found it. " 880 00:48:29,373 --> 00:48:31,585 I'm like, "I need that good feeling," so I let that happen 881 00:48:31,609 --> 00:48:33,177 There are no consequences. I don't care I woke up in the middle of the night and put my hand on my stomach and I feel my heartbeat and I like: 882 00:48:33,911 --> 00:48:36,947 "Oh, my God, I'm a mother." 883 00:48:37,014 --> 00:48:39,550 I'm so stupid. 884 00:48:39,617 --> 00:48:42,286 I don't know that you can feel the pulse somewhere other than your wrist 885 00:48:44,622 --> 00:48:46,023 That's the first time I've noticed it a pulse elsewhere in my body. 886 00:48:46,323 --> 00:48:50,227 And I think I planted a baby in four hours. 887 00:48:50,294 --> 00:48:53,931 I'm like, "Whoo! It happens quickly. 888 00:48:53,998 --> 00:48:56,066 889 00:48:56,133 --> 00:48:57,635 890 00:48:58,235 --> 00:49:00,271 No wonder this abortion is a hot topic. 891 00:49:02,039 --> 00:49:04,108 There are people who live and breathe there. " 892 00:49:04,642 --> 00:49:06,677 Well, I can't tell my mother. She will kill me 893 00:49:06,977 --> 00:49:08,579 I don't have internet at that time, 894 00:49:08,646 --> 00:49:11,982 Not only because my mother didn't allow me, It not found yet, okay? 895 00:49:12,049 --> 00:49:15,085 So, all I have is a typewriter, and you can't ask for your typewriter: 896 00:49:15,152 --> 00:49:18,088 "Can I touch, and then get pregnant from that? " 897 00:49:19,089 --> 00:49:22,459 Because your typewriter only has a piece of from paper looking back at you, like: 898 00:49:22,593 --> 00:49:25,362 " I don't know if you can get pregnant. I'm a typewriter. " 899 00:49:25,429 --> 00:49:28,165 So, you're just stuck. It's stuck, isn't it? 900 00:49:28,365 --> 00:49:31,035 So, I have to go... to the library. 901 00:49:33,270 --> 00:49:36,373 And I can't ask librarians because he is my mother's friend. 902 00:49:36,440 --> 00:49:40,244 I can't be like, "I jerked. What do you think, baby or not?" 903 00:49:43,080 --> 00:49:45,583 So, I have to take a walk to the card catalog 904 00:49:47,251 --> 00:49:49,253 What if you are younger and you don't know, 905 00:49:49,320 --> 00:49:51,989 That's what we had before the internet in the library. 906 00:49:52,056 --> 00:49:54,024 This is a catalog containing cards. 907 00:49:55,092 --> 00:49:58,529 And there are cards that have the name from each book in the library. 908 00:49:58,629 --> 00:50:01,232 Now, as the year goes by and more information is out there, 909 00:50:01,298 --> 00:50:03,767 they continue to make more cards in the catalog 910 00:50:04,034 --> 00:50:07,171 They don't get additional catalogs, no, no. Just push it on one. 911 00:50:07,238 --> 00:50:09,073 You put your finger in and take risks. 912 00:50:09,139 --> 00:50:11,075 You might not get your finger back. Like, "Aah!" 913 00:50:11,141 --> 00:50:14,445 So I have to see for a book about pregnancy Now, once again, the card catalog is not in alphabetical order. No, no, no. 914 00:50:14,511 --> 00:50:18,349 This is in something is called the Dewey Decimal System, 915 00:50:18,415 --> 00:50:21,018 which is a complex set of numbers 916 00:50:21,185 --> 00:50:23,187 the librarian must go to college to study. 917 00:50:23,254 --> 00:50:25,589 918 00:50:26,156 --> 00:50:29,293 But they threw it in the lobby at us, like, "You will find out." 919 00:50:29,727 --> 00:50:33,330 So... I found a book about pregnancy and, of course, not just say pregnancy and then gang P. 920 00:50:33,397 --> 00:50:36,700 No, I have to memorize, like, 12 numbers. 921 00:50:36,767 --> 00:50:39,069 So, that's when we were smart. We can memorize 12 numbers. 922 00:50:39,136 --> 00:50:42,239 We don't need to take pictures or anything. 923 00:50:42,306 --> 00:50:44,108 And so on... 924 00:50:44,174 --> 00:50:45,609 Then I walk all the way back... to the shelf 925 00:50:45,676 --> 00:50:49,813 I didn't give example number 12 Because I'm too stupid now. 926 00:50:50,080 --> 00:50:53,150 There is no book What to Expect If You're Expecting 'Because You Have Been Wanted, 927 00:50:53,217 --> 00:50:57,321 928 00:50:57,388 --> 00:50:58,522 so I'm like, "Argh!" 929 00:51:00,190 --> 00:51:02,593 So, I did nothing. If I am pregnant, 930 00:51:02,660 --> 00:51:05,829 it's definitely like the TV program where I only have it in the toilet 931 00:51:07,064 --> 00:51:10,801 But nine months later, when there were no babies coming, I was like, "I must have had a miscarriage. 932 00:51:11,068 --> 00:51:13,370 So tragic, but it's right for me, you know." 933 00:51:16,573 --> 00:51:18,842 So, then I found it. I found all the facts. 934 00:51:19,109 --> 00:51:21,321 Eggs don't sit there, it only comes once in a while. 935 00:51:21,345 --> 00:51:23,647 And if you use a condom It's 99.9 percent effective. 936 00:51:23,714 --> 00:51:25,749 I'm like, "I have to lose my virginity at that time." 937 00:51:25,816 --> 00:51:29,286 But my girlfriend and I broke up and I was just going to college, 938 00:51:29,353 --> 00:51:31,622 I'm like, "How will I go? lose my virginity now 939 00:51:31,722 --> 00:51:35,626 I don't know anyone in college. What, will I go in and go to a man and leave, 940 00:51:35,693 --> 00:51:39,163 " Want to have sex ? " They must fall in love before they do that? And then I think, " Wait, how can I get a guy? 941 00:51:45,803 --> 00:51:48,272 to be interested in me unless he thinks I'm experienced? 942 00:51:48,339 --> 00:51:50,841 No guy wants to sleep with a virgin. " 943 00:51:51,108 --> 00:51:52,588 I don't know that either. 944 00:51:54,511 --> 00:51:55,679 945 00:51:57,648 --> 00:51:59,483 So, I spread rumors about myself. 946 00:52:02,553 --> 00:52:07,324 I told everyone that at the age of 18, entered college in 1992, 947 00:52:07,391 --> 00:52:09,226 that I've slept with ten people. 948 00:52:09,293 --> 00:52:11,829 That's a lot, ten people. I mean, not now, but then. 949 00:52:11,895 --> 00:52:14,231 That's a lot. Ten people aged 18 years a lot. 950 00:52:14,298 --> 00:52:16,800 Some people don't have ten people in their city Ten people. 951 00:52:18,302 --> 00:52:20,371 And 1992 was an innocent and innocent time. 952 00:52:20,671 --> 00:52:22,673 Beverly Hills, 90210, Brenda and Dylan, 953 00:52:22,740 --> 00:52:25,442 they wait a year lose their virginity to each other. 954 00:52:25,509 --> 00:52:28,445 Dylan is an alcoholic who lives alone. She's still a virgin. 955 00:52:28,512 --> 00:52:30,147 That is the time of the innocent. 956 00:52:33,517 --> 00:52:36,754 So, no guy wants to have sex with me because they think I have PMS 957 00:52:36,820 --> 00:52:38,222 because I screwed ten people. 958 00:52:38,889 --> 00:52:41,925 So, I go from year to year is not laid down 959 00:52:42,292 --> 00:52:45,396 until I met someone who transferred to my college my senior year 960 00:52:45,462 --> 00:52:47,798 and he has never heard the rumor and I did not tell him. 961 00:52:47,865 --> 00:52:50,934 We have sex, it's fun, no problem. I don't remember every detail 962 00:52:51,201 --> 00:52:54,371 Because it's been a long time, but it's beautiful. And I walked home that day, 963 00:52:54,438 --> 00:52:57,541 just, you know, listening to my Discman, listening to Madonna, 964 00:52:57,608 --> 00:53:01,378 You know, the Bedtime Stories album. I like, "I understand, I'm also sexual, Madge." 965 00:53:01,445 --> 00:53:03,347 And, um... 966 00:53:03,414 --> 00:53:05,649 But something stopped me dead when I was walking 967 00:53:05,716 --> 00:53:08,519 and I like, "Wait a minute, my hymen doesn't break." 968 00:53:09,353 --> 00:53:12,890 That's another thing they teach us girls. We have a hymen. This is a piece of skin 969 00:53:13,190 --> 00:53:15,492 It's somewhere in our vagina and the penis stabs it 970 00:53:15,559 --> 00:53:18,829 and we bleed and get dirty sheets and we suck, fuck you, you dumped. 971 00:53:18,896 --> 00:53:20,898 So now... 972 00:53:22,366 --> 00:53:24,468 My hymen doesn't break and I'm like, "Uh-oh. I hope my hymen isn't pushed into my body 973 00:53:25,302 --> 00:53:27,671 and now it's suffocating, You know, my internal organs." 974 00:53:27,738 --> 00:53:30,374 I don't even know what a hymen is. How strong is that? How does it work? 975 00:53:32,276 --> 00:53:35,446 And I'm like, "I have to go to the doctor." 976 00:53:36,280 --> 00:53:38,215 So, I went to the school nurse, but I don't want to act like I just lost my virginity, So, I tried playing everything "cas." 977 00:53:38,715 --> 00:53:41,585 978 00:53:41,652 --> 00:53:44,521 979 00:53:44,988 --> 00:53:47,391 I entered, I was like, "Hey, quick question. 980 00:53:47,758 --> 00:53:49,760 Um... 981 00:53:52,362 --> 00:53:55,799 When I lost my virginity, whenever it was... 982 00:53:55,866 --> 00:53:57,000 uh... 983 00:53:57,634 --> 00:53:59,703 My hymen not broken. What's wrong with that? " 984 00:54:01,772 --> 00:54:03,807 She's like, "That's an old life story. 985 00:54:03,874 --> 00:54:05,542 It's okay. If you already use tampons 986 00:54:05,609 --> 00:54:08,545 or ride horses or take dance classes They can stretch, can break." 987 00:55:26,012 --> 00:54:09,612 I go: 988 00:54:10,247 --> 00:54:14,351 "Okay, can't it be pushed and start strangling your organs?" 989 00:54:14,418 --> 00:54:16,653 "No, this is tissue." "Can it be rocked and...?" 990 00:54:16,720 --> 00:54:19,356 "No, not tissue, like, this..." 991 00:54:19,423 --> 00:54:20,657 I go, "Oh, okay, okay." 992 00:54:22,926 --> 00:54:25,629 He saw my chart like, "Around 22." He goes: 993 00:54:25,696 --> 00:54:29,800 "So, you don't just lose your virginity, no?" "No, I fucked like ten people." 994 00:54:30,667 --> 00:54:32,603 And that's when I underwent the first STD test. 995 00:54:32,870 --> 00:54:34,738 I see... 996 00:54:35,906 --> 00:54:37,274 So, I'm in a relationship, 997 00:54:37,341 --> 00:54:40,043 and I don't have a joke about it because this is a good story. 998 00:54:40,310 --> 00:54:43,514 I am with someone I really love, we have known each other for a long time... 999 00:54:43,580 --> 00:54:46,180 And see you calm down. Nobody likes good things, I understand. 1000 00:54:48,852 --> 00:54:51,822 But there are times in my life when I am what I call "single" singular, 1001 00:54:51,889 --> 00:54:54,625 when I was like, "God, it seems like nobody likes me." 1002 00:54:54,725 --> 00:54:57,327 I'm not picked and I don't like how it feels. 1003 00:54:57,394 --> 00:55:00,697 And I read self-help books like that, take yourself. 1004 00:55:00,764 --> 00:55:03,333 So, I did that. And I will sit in the bar 1005 00:55:03,400 --> 00:55:06,603 and... people will come and go, "Can I sit here?" I go, "no. I also sit there, please stop. 1006 00:55:09,439 --> 00:55:11,308 I'm... I'm dating myself, So, please?" 1007 00:55:13,410 --> 00:55:16,480 I started saying nonsense things, 1008 00:55:18,482 --> 00:55:19,917 1009 00:55:23,921 --> 00:55:27,057 You can't love someone until you love yourself, You know? "What nonsense? 1010 00:55:27,324 --> 00:55:29,326 You can love someone If you don't love yourself. What a pleasant disturbance right? I see... 1011 00:55:29,393 --> 00:55:31,862 But my friend did this. He decided to have a party. 1012 00:55:34,031 --> 00:55:36,667 He calls it Facebook on Real Life. And he invites a group of people... 1013 00:55:36,733 --> 00:55:40,037 The idea is great. He invites people like that to get to know each other. You can guarantee someone If you don't know them well . So, you can be like, "Oh hey, John is fun. He is a murderer. 1014 00:55:43,006 --> 00:55:46,109 1015 00:55:46,376 --> 00:55:48,946 1016 00:55:49,012 --> 00:55:52,349 1017 00:55:52,416 --> 00:55:54,651 Don't go home with him, but it's fun at parties. Good. " 1018 00:55:54,751 --> 00:55:57,487 They are like," Oh, cool. " I met this man, a very nice guy. liked the same thing, talked about the same thing 1019 00:55:57,554 --> 00:55:58,589 he didn't send pic dick, nothing was inappropriate 1020 00:55:58,655 --> 00:56:00,724 I felt respected and then, you know, after a few weeks, 1021 00:56:00,791 --> 00:56:03,393 he asked me to go drinking wine with him. I'm like, "We're going on a date." 1022 00:56:03,460 --> 00:56:05,896 We sit there and drink and talk. 1023 00:56:05,963 --> 00:56:08,865 I don't get a vibration he wants to sleep with me, 1024 00:56:08,932 --> 00:56:12,402 1025 00:56:12,569 --> 00:56:15,005 1026 00:56:15,072 --> 00:56:17,507 1027 00:56:17,574 --> 00:56:19,576 1028 00:56:19,643 --> 00:56:21,778 1029 00:56:21,845 --> 00:56:26,016 1030 00:56:26,083 --> 00:56:29,753 1031 00:56:29,820 --> 00:56:31,622 1032 00:56:31,688 --> 00:56:33,657 1033 00:56:34,958 --> 00:56:36,426 1034 00:56:36,860 --> 00:56:39,105 1035 00:56:39,129 --> 00:56:40,931 1036 00:56:40,998 --> 00:56:42,966 1037 00:56:43,033 --> 00:56:44,067 1038 00:56:44,935 --> 00:56:47,904 No, I'm acting interested. I'm like, "Tell me about your boyfriend?" 1039 00:56:47,971 --> 00:56:49,773 And... 1040 00:56:50,440 --> 00:56:53,110 There's nothing wrong with getting along with women if you have a boyfriend 1041 00:56:53,176 --> 00:56:55,479 Absolutely not I have many male friends. 1042 00:56:55,545 --> 00:56:58,582 But that's it, the door is closed. Thank you, I have a male friend. 1043 00:56:58,649 --> 00:57:00,651 I don't need it anymore. I don't need it anymore. 1044 00:57:00,717 --> 00:57:03,687 I have a lot, right I don't understand what the angle is. 1045 00:57:03,754 --> 00:57:06,923 I said, "Is your girlfriend angry You came out with a woman?" 1046 00:57:06,990 --> 00:57:10,093 He said, "Oh, no, he knows I love women. I am a male feminist." 1047 00:57:10,160 --> 00:57:12,863 I go, "'I'm a male feminist.' 1048 00:57:13,430 --> 00:57:16,633 Thank you very much for being on our side, men fucking... " 1049 00:57:16,700 --> 00:57:19,970 If I want to drink damn wine With feminists, I will stay at home 1050 00:57:20,037 --> 00:57:21,738 and I might even be able to lay down. I... 1051 00:57:23,106 --> 00:57:26,176 And my fingers don't have billions and billions of sperm. 1052 00:57:27,978 --> 00:57:30,948 I started thinking about it, like, "I see how life is different. 1053 00:57:31,014 --> 00:57:34,518 I see how it's different. "Back at day, the man will marry the woman 1054 00:57:34,584 --> 00:57:36,453 who cooks and cleanses and has a baby 1055 00:57:36,520 --> 00:57:38,655 and she starts to stare at him more like a mother. 1056 00:57:41,458 --> 00:57:44,061 1057 00:57:44,127 --> 00:57:47,798 All right, me and all the other women won't be whores of your mind, dude, 1058 00:57:47,864 --> 00:57:48,732 OK? 1059 00:57:48,865 --> 00:57:51,768 You won't finger him then come out, drink with me 1060 00:57:51,835 --> 00:57:54,871 and talking about documentaries until midnight, you pig 1061 00:57:56,907 --> 00:57:58,175 Thank you. 1062 00:57:58,241 --> 00:58:02,679 So... we are not friends anymore, but I really... 1063 00:58:04,214 --> 00:58:07,184 I know it sounds like I hate men. I'm really not I like men 1064 00:58:07,250 --> 00:58:09,586 and I see them the way I see children, 1065 00:58:09,653 --> 00:58:13,023 which is like, "Oh, my God, for people who doesn't know what you are doing, 1066 00:58:13,090 --> 00:58:15,125 You have so much energy about it, you know." 1067 00:58:15,192 --> 00:58:19,129 But... the... One... 1068 00:58:21,631 --> 00:58:24,968 A really cool area, I like people saying they're feminists, 1069 00:58:25,035 --> 00:58:28,905 and that's like, you know, white people can do it Say they identify for Black Lives Matter, 1070 00:58:28,972 --> 00:58:30,607 and men can say that they are feminists. 1071 00:58:30,674 --> 00:58:34,711 This is really cool. There is one area that I don't know why we can't bite this, 1072 00:58:34,778 --> 00:58:37,814 it will be very fast and easy to do, is street harassment 1073 00:58:37,881 --> 00:58:41,118 There's still one thing that we scream at some men 1074 00:58:41,218 --> 00:58:45,022 to understand, you know, That is a very scary thing. 1075 00:58:45,088 --> 00:58:49,559 And I feel like if you would scream out of your car to a woman, commit to it. 1076 00:58:49,626 --> 00:58:52,829 Get an old car with horns like, "Aooga!" 1077 00:58:53,997 --> 00:58:55,532 This is very stupid. 1078 00:58:56,733 --> 00:59:01,271 So, you know, mo... All my male friends are not idiots, they don't act like this, 1079 00:59:01,538 --> 00:59:04,141 But I found one of my friends who do I respect doing this 1080 00:59:04,307 --> 00:59:07,778 I like, "Are you disturbing the streets?" "It's not harassment, this is praise." 1081 00:59:07,844 --> 00:59:11,014 And I went, "What did you do?" "I already shouted, 'Nice breasts.'" 1082 00:59:11,081 --> 00:59:13,116 "Are you shouting 'nice breasts' to women?" 1083 00:59:13,183 --> 00:59:14,584 He said, "The tits are good." 1084 00:59:14,651 --> 00:59:17,320 "I understand the inspiration behind it, I just... 1085 00:59:18,655 --> 00:59:21,792 You can't do that to us. This... This... It's scary." 1086 00:59:21,858 --> 00:59:24,628 He said, "What's scary about 'nice breasts'?" I go, "alright..." 1087 00:59:25,595 --> 00:59:28,832 He said, "This is a compliment." I go, "I understand, let me separate this. 1088 00:59:28,899 --> 00:59:35,238 I get on his face that 'her breasts are good,' dictionary, technically a compliment, huh. 1089 00:59:35,305 --> 00:59:39,810 But we don't know, if we don't respond way what you want us to respond to, 1090 00:59:39,876 --> 00:59:42,746 or if we don't respond at all, 'nice tits' can be followed up 1091 00:59:42,813 --> 00:59:45,949 with, 'Damn, bitch,' and then we get scared. " 1092 00:59:46,016 --> 00:59:47,684 And my friend left," Oh, I understand. 1093 00:59:47,851 --> 00:59:51,588 What if I just shout 'nice breasts' But don't shout 'fuck you, bitch' after? " 1094 00:59:51,655 --> 00:59:53,790 I'm like," No, but we don't... 1095 00:59:53,857 --> 00:59:56,293 We don't know. We don't know. 'Good things...' " 1096 00:59:56,593 --> 01:00:00,097 Praise and murder both start with praise. 1097 01:00:00,163 --> 01:00:02,866 So, we don't know. We don't know. We don't know 1098 01:00:02,933 --> 01:00:04,093 when someone says" her breasts are good " 1099 01:00:04,134 --> 01:00:07,037 if only, beeping, beeping, "Good tits, goodbye," and they leave, 1100 01:00:07,104 --> 01:00:08,738 or if it will happen like, "her breasts are good" 1101 01:00:08,805 --> 01:00:10,173 stop the car and like it, 1102 01:00:10,240 --> 01:00:13,076 '"Good tits are so good, will cut them off, put them in a blender. Then I'll put them in the fridge 1103 01:00:13,143 --> 01:00:14,945 and make the breasts appear. Tits, tits, tits. know. 1104 01:00:15,145 --> 01:00:18,014 So, my friend left, "What should I say?" I go, "Don't say anything. Say no words. 1105 01:00:20,250 --> 01:00:24,688 Say no words." 1106 01:00:24,754 --> 01:00:25,789 He goes, "That is my free speech. It is free speech. You cannot do that." 1107 01:00:25,856 --> 01:00:29,259 I go, "This is not... Whatever free speech means. 1108 01:00:29,326 --> 01:00:31,361 1109 01:00:31,628 --> 01:00:32,896 But, okay, fine, freedom of speech. 1110 01:00:33,196 --> 01:00:37,200 I'm not saying that you can't say 'nice breasts' I said, please don't shout at us. 1111 01:00:37,267 --> 01:00:40,170 So, maybe if you drive by a woman who has nice breasts, 1112 01:00:40,270 --> 01:00:43,206 You roll your window and destroy your face from the glass 1113 01:00:43,273 --> 01:00:45,275 and just go, 'Nice tits'. You can do that. 1114 01:00:46,343 --> 01:00:48,879 Or see a woman with nice breasts and call friends and leave, 1115 01:00:48,945 --> 01:00:51,848 'Good tits, good breasts, I see good breasts. Well. Nice breasts 1116 01:00:52,849 --> 01:00:56,419 Or if you have time, turns off the road, goes to the field, 1117 01:00:56,686 --> 01:01:01,224 kneel and let God know 'Good tits!' " 1118 01:01:10,300 --> 01:01:13,937 My friend and I can't come for any agreement about this 1119 01:01:14,337 --> 01:01:16,206 So, I'm like," Maybe he is right. " 1120 01:01:16,273 --> 01:01:20,210 If we just shout," No, no, no, " people only hear their mother: 1121 01:01:21,278 --> 01:01:25,048 So, we can't just say, "Don't say this, Don't..." There may be a middle ground. Maybe there is something you can say. I don't know what it is. 1122 01:01:25,115 --> 01:01:27,784 = = But I have a recent experience. That gave me some kind of idea. 1123 01:01:27,851 --> 01:01:30,787 So, I was in North Carolina and I was walking alone. 1124 01:01:30,854 --> 01:01:33,957 1125 01:01:34,257 --> 01:01:37,794 And I'm on the roadside and it's dusk. 1126 01:01:37,861 --> 01:01:40,063 And a white man in a truck... passes. 1127 01:01:40,997 --> 01:01:43,767 And then he stopped... and he pulled back... 1128 01:01:44,434 --> 01:01:46,303 and he just looked at me from the window. 1129 01:01:47,003 --> 01:01:48,805 And I'm like, "Oh, shit." 1130 01:01:50,140 --> 01:01:52,275 Because if you are a woman or not white or gay 1131 01:01:52,409 --> 01:01:55,946 and you walk alone in the South and a white man in a truck stops, 1132 01:01:56,346 --> 01:01:59,115 You know in 20 minutes There will be candles and flowers 1133 01:01:59,182 --> 01:02:01,484 where are you standing, right? That... yes. 1134 01:02:02,819 --> 01:02:05,222 Guy lowered his window and left, "Excuse me, mom. 1135 01:02:05,288 --> 01:02:07,457 Do you mind if I say something really creepy to you? " 1136 01:02:11,728 --> 01:02:14,164 And like an idiot, I walk into the truck. " Good. " 1137 01:02:16,066 --> 01:02:19,769 And then I'm angry and I think... I spend a little while and think of all women 1138 01:02:19,836 --> 01:02:22,872 from real... Severe abuse goes bad, acid on face only a few violations like "nice breasts," and I like it, "No. 1139 01:02:22,939 --> 01:02:25,842 No, you can't say anything creepy. " I go," No, you can't and make love to you. " 1140 01:02:25,909 --> 01:02:30,113 I started walking away proud of myself and realized," I look crazy. " 1141 01:02:30,180 --> 01:02:33,283 1142 01:02:33,350 --> 01:02:36,219 That's what happens, is if you're talking to a girl in a bar 1143 01:02:36,286 --> 01:02:37,187 and it works fine 1144 01:02:37,254 --> 01:02:39,956 and after one minute he is like, "Damn it!" 1145 01:02:40,023 --> 01:02:41,291 "What did I do?" "There is no." 1146 01:02:41,358 --> 01:02:44,094 But we are taught to be polite and so, we hold it 1147 01:02:44,160 --> 01:02:46,429 All we have to say is, "I don't want to talk." 1148 01:02:46,496 --> 01:02:50,166 But we talk and we are like, "Damn eating!" And you are very confused. And so on... 1149 01:02:50,233 --> 01:02:52,369 We have to be better at that. And so, anyway... 1150 01:02:53,370 --> 01:02:56,172 He left, "Ma'am, I didn't mean to frighten you. I'm sorry. I..." 1151 01:02:57,440 --> 01:03:00,777 I just want to say that I love your boots. That's it, I like your boots. 1152 01:03:00,844 --> 01:03:03,046 I wear big black platform boots, he goes: 1153 01:03:03,113 --> 01:03:05,348 "I'm married. I'm not trying to pick you up. 1154 01:03:05,415 --> 01:03:08,918 I've never noticed fashion in my life. Well, I have one more question." 1155 01:03:08,985 --> 01:03:11,121 "This is a scary question." I go, "What?" 1156 01:03:11,187 --> 01:03:14,891 He said, "Are they comfortable?" "Yes." "That's a win-win for you, isn't it?" 1157 01:03:14,958 --> 01:03:15,958 I like: 1158 01:03:23,300 --> 01:03:25,140 I can't live with myself otherwise. " 1159 01:03:26,503 --> 01:03:29,873 And then he left. I like, " He can't live with himself 1160 01:03:30,307 --> 01:03:33,343 If he doesn't give me that compliment. " That's very dramatic. 1161 01:03:33,576 --> 01:03:36,112 And again, It's hard for men in the world. 1162 01:03:36,179 --> 01:03:37,547 We have to be kind to them. 1163 01:03:38,315 --> 01:03:40,950 And so on... But my part is evil and I'm like: 1164 01:03:41,017 --> 01:03:44,254 "Lord, it must be great if I don't let him praise me. " 1165 01:03:44,454 --> 01:03:48,358 Somehow I can see the rest of his life being played, deep regret, you know. This is like a kind of game set in South 1166 01:03:48,425 --> 01:03:51,194 and he is at home every night and he is like: 1167 01:03:51,261 --> 01:03:53,396 "I'm not hungry tonight, Martha." He's like, "Henry, I made your favorite. 1168 01:03:56,166 --> 01:03:59,836 1169 01:03:59,903 --> 01:04:02,405 Two nights and you haven't eaten it. You are all bones "Did you cheat me, Henry?" "No, Martha, it's not about sex. Sometimes things about... fashion. Son, if you get that opportunity to praise women and not accept them, 1170 01:04:04,974 --> 01:04:08,478 You might not be able to live with yourself. 1171 01:04:09,079 --> 01:04:12,015 Listen to your father. " 1172 01:04:16,553 --> 01:04:20,190 He was on his deathbed, his father was like, "Son, is there more wisdom before you leave?" 1173 01:04:20,323 --> 01:04:22,325 And he was like, "Black shoes," and then he died. 1174 01:04:23,159 --> 01:04:24,227 Nobody knows what that means. His wife never understood. 1175 01:04:25,562 --> 01:04:29,466 1176 01:04:29,532 --> 01:04:32,402 1177 01:04:33,536 --> 01:04:36,172 1178 01:04:36,239 --> 01:04:39,409 "Black shoes? I know what that means. His father is in war. 1179 01:04:39,476 --> 01:04:43,279 His father wears black boots. He wants to wear his father's shoes in his coffin." 1180 01:04:43,346 --> 01:04:46,516 And he doesn't. He pushed his father's boots at the foot of his body. 1181 01:04:46,583 --> 01:04:49,919 And he is in heaven, like, "I don't mean black boots. I like women's shoes. That's right, Jesus, I like women's shoes. 1182 01:04:49,986 --> 01:04:53,123 I can be up here." 1183 01:04:53,189 --> 01:04:54,524 I see... 1184 01:04:54,591 --> 01:04:56,493 That's when I started thinking. 1185 01:04:56,559 --> 01:04:57,927 Praise, if you have to shout at us, yell about our clothes, not our bodies. 1186 01:04:58,161 --> 01:05:03,233 1187 01:05:03,299 --> 01:05:06,469 We don't want to think about it we have a body every five minutes, 1188 01:05:06,536 --> 01:05:09,572 and you make us think about it All the time, and we don't want to. 1189 01:05:09,639 --> 01:05:12,509 You know that feeling if you only have your key and phone 1190 01:05:12,575 --> 01:05:15,478 and you feel very free? We want to feel like that at the bank, 1191 01:05:15,545 --> 01:05:18,448 but can't take our breasts and vagina and leave them on the table. 1192 01:05:18,515 --> 01:05:22,018 So, we have to take these things even at 8:30 in the morning. 1193 01:05:22,085 --> 01:05:26,055 We're like, "Oh, God, everybody sees." And, you know... And if someone like: 1194 01:05:26,122 --> 01:05:29,292 "Good donkey," but we don't feel good, we are like, "Is that sarcastic?" 1195 01:05:29,359 --> 01:05:31,027 This is the whole mind of making love right? 1196 01:05:31,661 --> 01:05:34,664 But if you only praise clothes, we can all get along, right? 1197 01:05:34,931 --> 01:05:37,133 If you want the road to disturb us and you drive 1198 01:05:37,200 --> 01:05:41,070 and you are like, "Honey. Hey, baby... that little bow 1199 01:05:41,137 --> 01:05:44,474 matches your shoe details. It doesn't disappear to me, dear. I like good accessories. dinner later. It doesn't have to be with a man, can be alone You seem unafraid. 1200 01:05:46,042 --> 01:05:49,612 I like that. You walk with your work and freedom 1201 01:05:49,679 --> 01:05:53,149 1202 01:05:53,583 --> 01:05:56,419 1203 01:05:56,486 --> 01:05:59,989 And I'm not at all threatened. I don't need to joke with you. 1204 01:06:00,056 --> 01:06:02,725 I just let you know it's boxes and polka dot sometimes it can match you go, toots. " 1205 01:06:02,992 --> 01:06:04,432 Thank you very much. You are amazing 1206 01:06:05,528 --> 01:06:08,031 Thank you again. 1207 01:06:09,232 --> 01:06:10,266 JKL. 1208 01:06:12,969 --> 01:06:13,969 Jennifer. 1209 01:06:33,523 --> 01:06:34,523 - Oh! - Beloved. 1210 01:06:35,024 --> 01:06:36,059 - Hi. - Happy to meet you 1211 01:06:36,693 --> 01:06:39,095 - You look really beautiful up there. - Mother Oh thanks. - Jennifer, what are all these foods? - Oh, that's part of my rider 1212 01:06:39,162 --> 01:06:41,464 - What is a rider? - Like, Do you know, 1213 01:06:41,531 --> 01:06:44,434 1214 01:06:44,534 --> 01:06:46,369 1215 01:06:46,436 --> 01:06:48,571 the food they bring backstage part of your budget 1216 01:06:48,638 --> 01:06:51,207 - Do you like the show? - Did they take this from your salary? 1217 01:06:51,274 --> 01:06:53,710 This is a waste of Jennifer, you are not good at money. 1218 01:06:53,776 --> 01:06:56,513 This is not my money. Don't like shows or anything or...? 1219 01:06:56,579 --> 01:06:59,582 God. Not. Mom, Dad, come out, we are filming We are filming. Cut. 1220 01:06:59,649 --> 01:07:01,784 - Jennifer, who is this? - What program? 1221 01:07:02,051 --> 01:07:04,587 - This is my first family - Still speeding. 1222 01:07:04,654 --> 01:07:07,257 - Can we still roll over this? - Why did you do this? 1223 01:07:07,323 --> 01:07:10,026 Why do you hire people to play? Here. 1224 01:07:10,460 --> 01:07:12,362 Well, that's you It's done. 1225 01:07:13,029 --> 01:07:16,666 He doesn't look like me. I have blonde hair. He has gray hair. 1226 01:07:16,733 --> 01:07:18,301 And I'm not an Oriental, Jen. 1227 01:07:21,304 --> 01:07:22,304 I'm Japanese. 1228 01:07:22,338 --> 01:07:25,308 Oh, Jennifer's best friend at school is Japanese 1229 01:07:25,375 --> 01:07:28,578 and he taught Jennifer how to say the word "hello" 1230 01:07:31,047 --> 01:07:32,148 - "Konichiwa." - Konichiwa. 1231 01:07:32,215 --> 01:07:34,684 But that doesn't matter. Konichiwa for you Listen, this is an actor employed to represent characters 1232 01:07:34,751 --> 01:07:38,655 from Jen Kirkman, right? That makes it better? 1233 01:07:38,721 --> 01:07:40,690 What? There is no character based on your sister, Gail? 1234 01:07:40,757 --> 01:07:43,693 1235 01:07:43,760 --> 01:07:45,528 Okay, Gail, I must have put you in it, 1236 01:07:45,595 --> 01:07:48,064 but you said when I used to have that joke 1237 01:07:48,131 --> 01:07:50,466 about how you were caught smoking a pot, you said: 1238 01:07:50,533 --> 01:07:54,604 "Don't put me in your actions again." I see, I don't say anything about you anymore out of respect. 1239 01:07:54,671 --> 01:07:55,671 Jen, you just told the story again... on the camera 1240 01:07:56,439 --> 01:07:59,842 That's what he did, he talked about everyone 1241 01:08:01,244 --> 01:08:03,613 He calls Dad a racist. 1242 01:08:03,680 --> 01:08:05,248 - He said, "Oriental." - Maybe we can take a break. 1243 01:08:06,316 --> 01:08:08,851 Yes. Where is the pizza? Do you get pizza? 1244 01:08:09,252 --> 01:08:11,621 1245 01:08:11,688 --> 01:08:13,856 No, I don't get any pizza. I just did a show. 1246 01:08:14,123 --> 01:08:15,792 And I'm sorry, there's no part for you, 1247 01:08:15,858 --> 01:08:18,728 and the reason is not because I don't think you will be good, 1248 01:08:21,764 --> 01:08:24,434 I'm not comfortable. I'm really uncomfortable. 1249 01:08:24,500 --> 01:08:28,338 - you are not comfortable How do we feel? - Jen, why are you ruining everything? 1250 01:08:28,404 --> 01:08:30,707 - Yeah. Gosh, you know. - I know a good place, guys 1251 01:08:30,773 --> 01:08:32,408 - You do - We have to just leave. 1252 01:08:32,475 --> 01:08:35,244 - Forget about him. - Are you in the audience, 1253 01:08:35,311 --> 01:08:37,347 - because I didn't see you out there - Yeah. 1254 01:08:39,782 --> 01:08:42,885 Can we use all of that? Can we use all of that? 1255 01:08:43,152 --> 01:08:45,455 because my parents just destroyed my Netflix 1256 01:08:45,521 --> 01:08:47,223 and it's kind of fucking awesome.