1
00:00:35,310 --> 00:00:37,650
KATE: I did everything
that I was supposed to do.

2
00:00:37,730 --> 00:00:41,240
I didn't cry in meetings.
I didn't wear short skirts.

3
00:00:41,320 --> 00:00:44,360
I put up with the weird
upper management guys

4
00:00:44,450 --> 00:00:46,910
that kiss you on the mouth
at Christmas.

5
00:00:46,990 --> 00:00:49,830
Is it fair that to be the
youngest VP in my company,

6
00:00:49,910 --> 00:00:53,120
I will be the oldest mom
at preschool?

7
00:00:53,210 --> 00:00:55,880
Not really,
but that's part of the deal.

8
00:00:55,960 --> 00:00:57,920
I made a choice.

9
00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:00,880
Some women got pregnant.
I got promotions.

10
00:01:02,010 --> 00:01:04,970
And I still aspire
to meet someone

11
00:01:05,050 --> 00:01:07,260
and fall in love
and get married,

12
00:01:07,350 --> 00:01:11,270
but that is
a very high-risk scenario.

13
00:01:11,350 --> 00:01:13,770
And I want a baby now.
I'm 37.

14
00:01:18,690 --> 00:01:22,440
It's too much for a first date, isn't it?
I said too much.

15
00:01:24,070 --> 00:01:25,990
I'm just gonna
go use the...

16
00:01:35,750 --> 00:01:37,170
(SIGHING LOUDLY)

17
00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:40,130
I'm gonna need
this to go.

18
00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:43,590
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

19
00:01:44,550 --> 00:01:45,550
(GIGGLING)

20
00:02:04,240 --> 00:02:05,610
(GURGLING)

21
00:02:19,630 --> 00:02:21,340
Good morning. Thank you
for being here so early.

22
00:02:21,420 --> 00:02:22,630
Hi. How are you?

23
00:02:22,710 --> 00:02:24,300
Let's get started.

24
00:02:25,420 --> 00:02:26,970
(ALL BABBLING)

25
00:03:01,210 --> 00:03:02,210
That one.

26
00:04:03,980 --> 00:04:05,020
Well...

27
00:04:05,690 --> 00:04:08,440
I just don't like
your uterus.

28
00:04:08,530 --> 00:04:09,490
Don't get me wrong.

29
00:04:09,570 --> 00:04:13,070
Your eggs are in great shape,
but you have a T-shaped uterus.

30
00:04:13,160 --> 00:04:16,410
That combined with your
advanced maternal age,

31
00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:18,240
it's preventing
proper implantation.

32
00:04:18,330 --> 00:04:21,160
Why do I have
this T-shaped uterus?

33
00:04:21,250 --> 00:04:23,120
Well, probably has something
to do with medication

34
00:04:23,210 --> 00:04:25,920
that was given to your mother
when she was pregnant with you.

35
00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:27,420
We used lot of drugs
back in the '70s

36
00:04:27,500 --> 00:04:30,550
which we now know
can cause infertility.

37
00:04:30,630 --> 00:04:31,880
Infertility?

38
00:04:31,970 --> 00:04:36,180
Yeah. I would say that your chances
of conceiving are very low.

39
00:04:36,260 --> 00:04:37,300
How low?

40
00:04:37,390 --> 00:04:39,390
Well, I don't want to
assign a number to it.

41
00:04:39,470 --> 00:04:43,480
What would you assign it?
A color, a nickname, a locker?

42
00:04:43,560 --> 00:04:44,770
Okay.

43
00:04:44,860 --> 00:04:46,900
One in a million.

44
00:04:49,570 --> 00:04:51,650
I just don't like...

45
00:04:51,740 --> 00:04:53,570
Don't say that again.

46
00:04:56,580 --> 00:04:57,700
ROSE: Come to think of it,

47
00:04:57,780 --> 00:05:00,910
I did take something for liver spots
when I was pregnant with you,

48
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:05,000
but I really don't see how that could
cause any problems for your uterus.

49
00:05:05,080 --> 00:05:09,000
It was just a different time. They
didn't warn people about side effects.

50
00:05:09,090 --> 00:05:10,500
ROSE: They warned me.

51
00:05:10,590 --> 00:05:12,760
I think I might even
have signed something.

52
00:05:12,840 --> 00:05:13,840
What?

53
00:05:13,930 --> 00:05:18,760
Kate, I was 30 years old. I was starting
to get liver spots. Liver spots!

54
00:05:18,850 --> 00:05:21,770
I just hope you put
this baby mania to rest.

55
00:05:21,890 --> 00:05:23,180
It's not mania.

56
00:05:23,270 --> 00:05:24,730
How many times
have you tried now?

57
00:05:24,810 --> 00:05:26,850
Three?
Nine.

58
00:05:26,940 --> 00:05:28,440
The last two
were in vitro.

59
00:05:28,520 --> 00:05:29,860
Have you considered adoption?

60
00:05:29,940 --> 00:05:31,940
I have applied
for an adoption, yes.

61
00:05:32,030 --> 00:05:35,450
Kate, please don't get
a black baby.

62
00:05:36,450 --> 00:05:38,120
Well, I don't think we'll
have to worry about that,

63
00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:40,080
because for a single woman,

64
00:05:40,160 --> 00:05:41,910
it can take about five
years to get an adoption.

65
00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:45,620
I've just had it with all these
movie stars showing off.

66
00:05:45,710 --> 00:05:48,130
"Look at me
and my black baby."

67
00:05:48,210 --> 00:05:50,670
Kill me. I want you to
stab me with something.

68
00:05:50,750 --> 00:05:53,710
You know, Kate,
not everyone is as tolerant

69
00:05:53,800 --> 00:05:56,470
of your alternative lifestyle
as we are.

70
00:05:57,680 --> 00:05:59,720
Being single is not
an alternative lifestyle.

71
00:05:59,800 --> 00:06:01,680
It is when you're 37.

72
00:06:02,640 --> 00:06:03,640
(CHUCKLING)

73
00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:05,770
Oh, out like a light.

74
00:06:05,850 --> 00:06:07,390
Have you thought
about using a surrogate?

75
00:06:07,480 --> 00:06:09,060
I saw a thing
about it on Dateline.

76
00:06:09,150 --> 00:06:10,980
No, it's weird.
It's for weirdoes.

77
00:06:11,070 --> 00:06:12,570
I'm just gonna
keep trying by myself.

78
00:06:12,650 --> 00:06:16,070
Kate, building a family is not
like opening one of your stores.

79
00:06:16,150 --> 00:06:19,910
It's not an executive decision.
It's real life. lt's messy.

80
00:06:19,990 --> 00:06:23,120
These hormone injections make me want
to punch you in the face right now.

81
00:06:23,200 --> 00:06:24,330
No hitting.

82
00:06:24,410 --> 00:06:25,700
That's right.
You're right.

83
00:06:25,790 --> 00:06:27,710
There you go.
Come on.

84
00:06:27,830 --> 00:06:30,500
Well, how much longer are you
gonna put your body through this?

85
00:06:30,590 --> 00:06:32,340
Look, I know for years
I said I didn't want one,

86
00:06:32,420 --> 00:06:34,210
but I just
woke up one day,

87
00:06:34,300 --> 00:06:38,010
and I felt like every baby on
the street was staring at me.

88
00:06:39,140 --> 00:06:41,510
Katie's coming out
of the mommy closet.

89
00:06:43,060 --> 00:06:44,600
Hey, Tyler.

90
00:06:44,680 --> 00:06:47,310
Tyler, what is this
all over you?

91
00:06:47,390 --> 00:06:49,440
Is that chocolate
or poop?

92
00:06:50,520 --> 00:06:52,520
Is that chocolate or poop?

93
00:06:54,360 --> 00:06:55,940
It's chocolate.

94
00:06:57,360 --> 00:06:58,990
What if that
had been poop?

95
00:06:59,070 --> 00:07:01,320
I told you,
messy, but great.

96
00:07:15,710 --> 00:07:17,210
Not bad.

97
00:07:17,300 --> 00:07:19,170
Everybody do a shot
of this pea soup.

98
00:07:21,970 --> 00:07:25,350
Let's go with this.
Call it "Health Monster."

99
00:07:26,220 --> 00:07:28,270
That's great.

100
00:07:28,350 --> 00:07:29,890
It's what I do.

101
00:07:31,650 --> 00:07:32,900
You know,

102
00:07:34,360 --> 00:07:37,480
I was swimming this morning with
the dolphins in Costa Rica,

103
00:07:37,570 --> 00:07:39,570
and I realized something.

104
00:07:41,740 --> 00:07:43,870
I am a great man.

105
00:07:43,950 --> 00:07:46,330
And great men do great things.

106
00:07:47,830 --> 00:07:50,540
I want to open a flagship store
right here in Philadelphia.

107
00:07:50,620 --> 00:07:52,880
I want it to be the biggest
store we ever built,

108
00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:56,170
I want it to be made
of 100% recyclable materials,

109
00:07:56,250 --> 00:08:00,630
and I want it to be so beautiful that
people want to get married in it.

110
00:08:04,430 --> 00:08:06,310
Kate, join me up here.

111
00:08:08,270 --> 00:08:11,100
I'm wearing a dress, Barry.

112
00:08:11,190 --> 00:08:12,940
Won't you?

113
00:08:13,020 --> 00:08:14,100
Sure.

114
00:08:19,400 --> 00:08:20,570
Okay.

115
00:08:26,280 --> 00:08:30,500
Kate, I want you to spearhead
this as our new vice president.

116
00:08:31,870 --> 00:08:35,670
This is me transferring
my success to you.

117
00:08:38,630 --> 00:08:40,170
(ALL CLAPPING)

118
00:08:41,970 --> 00:08:43,550
Thank you, Barry.

119
00:08:44,140 --> 00:08:45,430
Hold on.

120
00:08:46,550 --> 00:08:48,350
(ALL CLAPPING)

121
00:08:52,980 --> 00:08:53,980
Thanks.

122
00:08:56,440 --> 00:08:57,980
Congratulations.
Yeah.

123
00:08:59,320 --> 00:09:00,980
Thank you.
Congratulations, Kate.

124
00:09:43,570 --> 00:09:45,700
Hello.
I'm Chaffee Bicknell.

125
00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:48,950
There's just one of you.

126
00:09:49,030 --> 00:09:52,620
I thought Chaffee and Bicknell
were two different people.

127
00:09:57,290 --> 00:09:58,540
Come in.
Certainly.

128
00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:06,380
I started this business because
I saw a growth market.

129
00:10:06,470 --> 00:10:08,470
We don't do
our own taxes anymore.

130
00:10:08,550 --> 00:10:10,260
We don't program
our computers.

131
00:10:10,350 --> 00:10:11,640
We outsource.

132
00:10:11,720 --> 00:10:14,680
And what is surrogacy
if not outsourcing?

133
00:10:14,770 --> 00:10:16,730
Wait. You're not saying
my baby would be carried

134
00:10:16,810 --> 00:10:20,150
by some poor, underpaid
woman in the third world.

135
00:10:20,230 --> 00:10:21,320
No.

136
00:10:27,570 --> 00:10:29,320
We're also expensive.

137
00:10:29,410 --> 00:10:31,700
Our fee is $100,000.

138
00:10:32,580 --> 00:10:36,290
It costs more to have someone
born than to have someone killed.

139
00:10:36,370 --> 00:10:37,960
It takes longer.

140
00:10:38,080 --> 00:10:42,000
All of our surrogates undergo
extensive background checks.

141
00:10:42,090 --> 00:10:44,840
Criminal records, credit
reports, medical histories

142
00:10:44,920 --> 00:10:46,760
and psychological testing.

143
00:10:46,840 --> 00:10:49,890
But why do these women do it?
Is it just for the money?

144
00:10:49,970 --> 00:10:54,890
You do your job for the money, but I
bet you love it and you're good at it.

145
00:10:54,970 --> 00:10:57,430
Let me ask you a question.

146
00:10:57,520 --> 00:10:59,270
Do you plan on hiring a nanny?

147
00:10:59,350 --> 00:11:01,610
Of course.
I have to go back to work.

148
00:11:01,690 --> 00:11:03,320
How is this any different?

149
00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:07,690
A nanny is someone you trust to take
care of your baby after it's born.

150
00:11:07,780 --> 00:11:12,910
A surrogate mother is someone you trust to
take care of your baby before it's born.

151
00:11:12,990 --> 00:11:15,330
Either way it's your baby.

152
00:11:16,790 --> 00:11:18,580
And here's my baby.

153
00:11:19,540 --> 00:11:22,960
Hello, my sweetheart.
Hello, little one.

154
00:11:23,040 --> 00:11:27,210
Oh, yes.
What a good girl. Yes.

155
00:11:28,510 --> 00:11:30,220
Everyone deserves this.

156
00:11:30,300 --> 00:11:33,640
That's why I wanna remove
the stigma from surrogacy.

157
00:11:33,720 --> 00:11:36,770
There's no wrong way
to make a family.

158
00:11:36,850 --> 00:11:38,560
And you're proof of that.

159
00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:40,230
How do you mean?

160
00:11:40,310 --> 00:11:43,230
Just that you have this
beautiful baby using surrogacy.

161
00:11:43,310 --> 00:11:44,360
Oh, no.

162
00:11:44,440 --> 00:11:48,070
My husband and I conceived
Sabrina the old-fashioned way.

163
00:11:48,150 --> 00:11:49,780
But you're so...
Old?

164
00:11:50,860 --> 00:11:53,620
You wouldn't think so
if you saw my uterus.

165
00:11:53,700 --> 00:11:57,120
But you know what really made
this little angel possible?

166
00:11:57,200 --> 00:11:58,830
A time machine?

167
00:11:58,910 --> 00:12:00,580
A positive attitude.

168
00:12:00,670 --> 00:12:02,620
You may not have
my fertile body,

169
00:12:02,710 --> 00:12:05,710
but with my help
you can still be a mother.

170
00:12:06,750 --> 00:12:09,010
(SINGING) Make the cracks
break Shake it till they drop

171
00:12:09,090 --> 00:12:11,300
Make the booty go
wah, wah, wah

172
00:12:11,380 --> 00:12:13,760
Make the cracks break
Shake it till they drop

173
00:12:13,850 --> 00:12:15,300
Make the booty go
wah, wah, wah

174
00:12:15,390 --> 00:12:16,430
Nice.

175
00:12:16,510 --> 00:12:17,890
Yo, who you waiting on again?

176
00:12:17,970 --> 00:12:22,100
Her name's Angie. Well, she
might be my surrogate mother.

177
00:12:22,190 --> 00:12:24,270
That's right. You got
your baby mama coming.

178
00:12:24,360 --> 00:12:25,940
You know I got
two baby mamas, right?

179
00:12:26,020 --> 00:12:28,530
No, this is different. You had
relationships with those women.

180
00:12:28,610 --> 00:12:30,030
No, I had no relationships
with those women.

181
00:12:30,110 --> 00:12:32,150
I had relations
with those women.

182
00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:35,530
No. I'm paying her. This
was set up by an agency.

183
00:12:35,620 --> 00:12:38,950
There are contracts involved.
It's strictly business.

184
00:12:39,040 --> 00:12:42,000
You pay the bills, she have the baby.
That's called a baby mama.

185
00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:44,750
You ask any black man
in Philadelphia.

186
00:12:46,340 --> 00:12:48,000
(RAP MUSIC PLAYING
ON CAR STEREC)

187
00:12:48,090 --> 00:12:49,960
Yo, what if that's
your baby mama?

188
00:12:50,050 --> 00:12:51,090
I don't think that's her.

189
00:12:51,170 --> 00:12:53,470
(SINGING)
Here come your baby mama

190
00:12:53,550 --> 00:12:55,590
Riding a Suzuki

191
00:12:58,060 --> 00:13:00,220
I wanna spend
about 15 minutes here,

192
00:13:00,310 --> 00:13:03,640
then I wanna get my picture taken
punching the Rocky statue.

193
00:13:03,730 --> 00:13:05,060
Yeah, well, you're gonna
have to sketch it,

194
00:13:05,150 --> 00:13:06,310
'cause I didn't
bring a camera.

195
00:13:06,400 --> 00:13:09,400
Okay, you did that on purpose, didn't you?
Trying to sabotage my art.

196
00:13:09,530 --> 00:13:10,690
This might be them. CARL:
All right, I'm an artist.

197
00:13:10,820 --> 00:13:12,320
Oscar, this might be them. I
want it to look artistic.

198
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:13,900
You told me to tell you when
you were sounding ignorant.

199
00:13:13,990 --> 00:13:14,990
You're sounding ignorant.

200
00:13:15,070 --> 00:13:16,870
Angie?
What?

201
00:13:16,950 --> 00:13:18,080
I'm Kate.

202
00:13:18,160 --> 00:13:19,530
Hi.

203
00:13:20,910 --> 00:13:23,160
Nice to meet you.
This is Carl, my husband.

204
00:13:23,250 --> 00:13:24,370
Common-law.

205
00:13:24,460 --> 00:13:26,460
He always says that.

206
00:13:26,540 --> 00:13:28,540
Well, please,
come on in.

207
00:13:31,260 --> 00:13:32,590
Thank you.

208
00:13:33,590 --> 00:13:36,510
Listen, shut her down in
drive and slam it into park

209
00:13:36,590 --> 00:13:37,840
or it'll start smoking, okay?

210
00:13:37,930 --> 00:13:40,100
And I'll be back with this.

211
00:13:46,480 --> 00:13:49,440
KATE: So, how long have
you two been together?

212
00:13:49,520 --> 00:13:51,780
We met the summer after I
discontinued high school.

213
00:13:51,860 --> 00:13:53,990
And we've been
together ever since.

214
00:13:54,070 --> 00:13:55,650
He never officially
asked me to be his wife,

215
00:13:55,740 --> 00:13:57,320
but he never asked me
to not be his wife either,

216
00:13:57,410 --> 00:13:59,660
so things are going
pretty good.

217
00:14:02,700 --> 00:14:05,870
Wow. The place is amazing.

218
00:14:06,040 --> 00:14:07,040
Let me...

219
00:14:07,130 --> 00:14:08,210
Beautiful.

220
00:14:08,290 --> 00:14:13,210
Kind of looks like Kate
Hudson's New York pied-à-terre.

221
00:14:14,260 --> 00:14:17,340
She read that somewhere. I don't
think she's saying it right.

222
00:14:17,430 --> 00:14:19,470
No, she's saying it right.

223
00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:22,310
Out of all the places
that we've interviewed at,

224
00:14:22,390 --> 00:14:24,180
this is by far
the nicest.

225
00:14:24,270 --> 00:14:25,230
What does
your husband do?

226
00:14:25,310 --> 00:14:27,600
Well, I don't
have a husband.

227
00:14:27,690 --> 00:14:30,900
Got this place all by yourself?
Must have a really fancy job.

228
00:14:30,980 --> 00:14:35,240
Well, I am the vice president of
development for Round Earth Foods.

229
00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:38,030
So you take over
if the president is shot?

230
00:14:38,110 --> 00:14:39,110
(STAMMERING) Well...

231
00:14:41,280 --> 00:14:43,240
I like your shirt.
Thanks.

232
00:14:43,330 --> 00:14:46,870
It's a shirt-vest kind of...
l don't know.

233
00:14:46,960 --> 00:14:50,040
I just like making styles and stuff.
It's something I like to do.

234
00:14:51,500 --> 00:14:53,250
What, you don't
get down with rap?

235
00:14:53,340 --> 00:14:57,880
Boy, somewhere in there
I have an old Salt-n-Pepa CD.

236
00:14:58,130 --> 00:14:59,130
Hmm...

237
00:15:00,680 --> 00:15:02,430
What do you do, Carl?

238
00:15:02,510 --> 00:15:05,180
Carl is an
inventor/entrepreneur.

239
00:15:05,270 --> 00:15:06,270
Yeah.

240
00:15:06,350 --> 00:15:08,640
I'm still looking for
that home run, you know.

241
00:15:08,730 --> 00:15:13,520
I mean, when I saw the iPod
the first time, I was like...

242
00:15:13,650 --> 00:15:15,150
I mean, I could've
kicked myself.

243
00:15:15,230 --> 00:15:16,820
That was
so hard on him.

244
00:15:16,900 --> 00:15:18,950
Now we're pretty
tight on cash.

245
00:15:19,030 --> 00:15:21,030
So that led you
to surrogacy?

246
00:15:21,120 --> 00:15:22,370
Hey, I gotta say,

247
00:15:22,450 --> 00:15:25,740
when I first thought about Angie
carrying someone else's baby,

248
00:15:25,830 --> 00:15:27,790
I felt weird about it.

249
00:15:27,870 --> 00:15:29,370
Then I thought,
"Oh, my God,

250
00:15:29,460 --> 00:15:32,420
"if my wife's gotta have sex with
someone else's husband to do this..."

251
00:15:32,540 --> 00:15:34,130
Out of the question.
"...that's gonna cost extra."

252
00:15:34,210 --> 00:15:35,710
lt's out
of the question.

253
00:15:36,130 --> 00:15:38,720
ANGIE: Wow.
This is a nice view.

254
00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:40,760
So, have you
done this before?

255
00:15:40,840 --> 00:15:43,970
No. But I know I'm good
at getting pregnant.

256
00:15:44,060 --> 00:15:45,640
(STAMMERING) That's not
what I'm asking about.

257
00:15:45,720 --> 00:15:47,100
You know,
we've all had our scares.

258
00:15:47,180 --> 00:15:49,310
No, not really.
Me neither.

259
00:15:52,100 --> 00:15:55,190
Pardon my asking this,
but how many couples, women,

260
00:15:55,270 --> 00:15:58,900
how many people are you interviewing
before you make your decision?

261
00:16:00,950 --> 00:16:03,990
I guess you're like
our sixth or seventh.

262
00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:05,830
And how's it going?

263
00:16:05,910 --> 00:16:07,740
Good.

264
00:16:07,830 --> 00:16:09,500
You know how in science
they say that

265
00:16:09,580 --> 00:16:13,210
everybody's aura gives off
a different color?

266
00:16:13,290 --> 00:16:15,170
I can read those auras.

267
00:16:15,250 --> 00:16:17,590
I'm very sensitive
to people's energies.

268
00:16:17,710 --> 00:16:19,590
So, I meet new people
and I get exhausted.

269
00:16:19,670 --> 00:16:20,920
Oh, yeah.

270
00:16:22,220 --> 00:16:23,890
What color is my aura?

271
00:16:23,970 --> 00:16:25,140
Let me see.

272
00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:29,850
Sunsetty.
It's like a sunset.

273
00:16:29,930 --> 00:16:31,730
I'm really digging it.
Good.

274
00:16:31,810 --> 00:16:33,440
Congratulations.
Good, good.

275
00:16:33,520 --> 00:16:34,520
Really good color.

276
00:16:34,610 --> 00:16:35,730
Well, good.

277
00:16:35,820 --> 00:16:38,440
Because I really hope
that you like me, Angie,

278
00:16:38,530 --> 00:16:42,860
because I'm asking you for a
very big favor, you know.

279
00:16:42,950 --> 00:16:46,780
You have a God-given ability
that I just don't have.

280
00:16:46,870 --> 00:16:48,330
I know I could
be good at this.

281
00:16:48,410 --> 00:16:49,580
I think you could, too.

282
00:16:49,660 --> 00:16:51,370
And, you know,
it's nice to feel...

283
00:16:51,460 --> 00:16:53,040
Needed?
Yeah. Needed.

284
00:16:53,120 --> 00:16:54,370
Important, useful?

285
00:16:54,460 --> 00:16:55,670
I like all those words.

286
00:16:55,750 --> 00:16:58,500
Yeah, well, I can't do this
without you. I've tried.

287
00:16:58,590 --> 00:17:00,300
I need you, Angie.

288
00:17:05,050 --> 00:17:06,890
I'm gonna make
a decision.

289
00:17:06,970 --> 00:17:08,970
I made my decision.

290
00:17:09,100 --> 00:17:10,600
Decision made.

291
00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:14,440
Kate, I want you to
put your baby inside me.

292
00:17:14,520 --> 00:17:17,900
Angie, I'm gonna
put my baby inside you.

293
00:17:22,150 --> 00:17:24,780
(SENTIMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)

294
00:18:06,740 --> 00:18:10,030
This stuff is good. What's
the street name for this?

295
00:18:30,550 --> 00:18:31,720
So as you can see,

296
00:18:31,810 --> 00:18:35,890
we've transferred three of Kate's
fertilized eggs to your womb, Angie.

297
00:18:35,980 --> 00:18:37,770
Now with the hormones
you've been taking,

298
00:18:37,850 --> 00:18:41,310
the probability
of success is about 60%.

299
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:44,610
You should continue taking the hormones
and get as much rest as possible.

300
00:18:44,690 --> 00:18:48,360
And in about two weeks, you can
take a home pregnancy test.

301
00:18:51,740 --> 00:18:53,450
ANGIE: I live right here.

302
00:19:08,470 --> 00:19:10,180
Thanks for driving me
all the way home.

303
00:19:10,260 --> 00:19:12,680
Carl couldn't leave the house 'cause
he's trying to win a radio contest.

304
00:19:12,760 --> 00:19:14,560
Well, I would've
offered to do it anyway.

305
00:19:14,640 --> 00:19:16,680
Here, let me give you
some money for gas.

306
00:19:16,770 --> 00:19:18,640
No, no, please.
It's my treat.

307
00:19:18,730 --> 00:19:19,730
Really?

308
00:19:19,810 --> 00:19:21,440
Of course. Angie,
you don't understand.

309
00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:23,770
I want to be there for you
every step of the way.

310
00:19:26,150 --> 00:19:27,190
(MUSIC PLAYING CN RADIC)

311
00:19:27,280 --> 00:19:29,360
I hope you don't mind.
I bought you some groceries.

312
00:19:29,450 --> 00:19:32,280
I thought you might want
to start eating organic.

313
00:19:32,370 --> 00:19:35,200
(SCOFFS) That crap is for rich
people who hate themselves.

314
00:19:35,290 --> 00:19:37,120
Sorry, this place
is such a mess.

315
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:39,040
I haven't had time
to clean up.

316
00:19:39,120 --> 00:19:42,630
No, it has a nice
old-timey smell.

317
00:19:44,750 --> 00:19:45,840
Is that an alligator?

318
00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:48,840
Hellboy?
No, that's Carl's iguana.

319
00:19:48,920 --> 00:19:52,800
Great. Well, I'm gonna put this
fruit in your refrigerator.

320
00:19:56,720 --> 00:19:57,810
CARL: That's the song!

321
00:19:59,100 --> 00:20:03,150
When they play Red Red Wine, you
gotta be the 103.7th caller.

322
00:20:03,230 --> 00:20:05,070
What up, baby lady?
Hello.

323
00:20:05,150 --> 00:20:06,400
Shut the door, Carl!

324
00:20:06,480 --> 00:20:07,980
How am I gonna talk
through a door?

325
00:20:08,070 --> 00:20:10,320
How can you be
the 103.7th caller?

326
00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:13,240
Angie, I don't have time
to explain arithmetic to you.

327
00:20:13,320 --> 00:20:14,410
That don't
make no sense.

328
00:20:14,490 --> 00:20:16,240
I will see you in two weeks.
Please try to get some...

329
00:20:16,330 --> 00:20:18,240
Would you grab my smokes?

330
00:20:18,330 --> 00:20:21,040
You know you're not supposed to smoke
in front of me. I'm trying to quit.

331
00:20:21,120 --> 00:20:23,370
...rest. Try to get some rest. Yeah,
that's your situation, all right?

332
00:20:23,460 --> 00:20:26,590
I'm in here trying to win us
Arena Football tickets.

333
00:20:26,670 --> 00:20:28,090
Close the door, Carl.

334
00:20:28,630 --> 00:20:29,960
KATE: So,
what we're looking for

335
00:20:30,050 --> 00:20:34,050
is at least 15,000 square feet
in the next cool neighborhood.

336
00:20:34,140 --> 00:20:35,680
It can be open lots.

337
00:20:35,760 --> 00:20:37,930
It can be buildings that
we buy and tear down,

338
00:20:38,020 --> 00:20:39,270
although
no historic buildings.

339
00:20:39,350 --> 00:20:41,810
We want to be perceived
as enhancing the neighborhood,

340
00:20:41,890 --> 00:20:43,650
not destroying
its character.

341
00:20:43,730 --> 00:20:49,650
Also, Barry would like to use mostly
found and recycled materials.

342
00:20:49,740 --> 00:20:51,820
So that's gonna affect us,
zoning-wise.

343
00:20:52,490 --> 00:20:54,740
I don't care what we spend,
but we have to get it right.

344
00:21:14,550 --> 00:21:16,930
Shannon! Dante! Anybody?

345
00:21:21,890 --> 00:21:25,400
Sorry about that. Welcome to Super Fruity.
What can I get you?

346
00:21:25,480 --> 00:21:28,480
Does the Orange You Glad
I Didn't Say Banana?

347
00:21:28,570 --> 00:21:31,150
In fact contain banana?

348
00:21:31,240 --> 00:21:33,150
Yeah. Yeah,
but it's a good question.

349
00:21:33,240 --> 00:21:36,490
I think the name's a little more
clever than it is informative.

350
00:21:36,570 --> 00:21:38,240
Well, I will try it.

351
00:21:38,370 --> 00:21:39,370
Okay.

352
00:21:40,700 --> 00:21:42,830
Hey, I'm looking
for a new apartment.

353
00:21:42,910 --> 00:21:44,580
What is your read
on this neighborhood?

354
00:21:44,670 --> 00:21:49,000
The neighborhood's good. lt's good.
It's changing a lot.

355
00:21:49,090 --> 00:21:51,170
A lot of condos going up.

356
00:21:51,260 --> 00:21:53,550
The real estate people
are trying to give it one of those

357
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:57,010
clever names,
they call it WeBeSoCa,

358
00:21:57,090 --> 00:22:01,010
which is Webster, south
of Catherine, I guess.

359
00:22:01,850 --> 00:22:03,600
How's business?

360
00:22:06,270 --> 00:22:07,850
It's a little slow.

361
00:22:07,940 --> 00:22:12,690
But kind of tough, you know,
going up against the man.

362
00:22:12,780 --> 00:22:13,860
The cops?

363
00:22:13,940 --> 00:22:14,940
Jamba Juice.

364
00:22:15,030 --> 00:22:16,240
Jamba Juice is the man?

365
00:22:16,320 --> 00:22:17,360
Yeah.

366
00:22:17,450 --> 00:22:18,570
Corporate juice pimps.

367
00:22:18,660 --> 00:22:20,870
Thought you should know, and you'll
feel free to tell your friends.

368
00:22:20,950 --> 00:22:22,870
Okay. I will tell them.

369
00:22:25,620 --> 00:22:28,420
Okay, now.
You have a super fruity day.

370
00:22:33,380 --> 00:22:34,460
I want you to start
finding out

371
00:22:34,550 --> 00:22:39,590
what's available between the 1500 block
and 1800 block of West Catherine Street.

372
00:22:39,680 --> 00:22:41,010
(CALL WAITING CHIMES)

373
00:22:41,100 --> 00:22:43,350
Ron, I gotta call you back.

374
00:22:43,430 --> 00:22:44,930
Angie?
Hi, it's Angie.

375
00:22:45,020 --> 00:22:47,230
I know. I know.
So, any news?

376
00:22:47,310 --> 00:22:50,190
Well, I peed on one of those
stick thingies, and it said yes.

377
00:22:50,480 --> 00:22:51,480
(SQUEALS)

378
00:22:51,690 --> 00:22:53,320
Angie, that is just
the greatest news!

379
00:22:53,400 --> 00:22:54,900
That's just
unbelievably great.

380
00:22:54,990 --> 00:22:55,990
Yeah, yeah.

381
00:22:56,650 --> 00:22:57,900
Thank you so much, Angie.

382
00:22:57,990 --> 00:23:01,410
If you need anything, anything
at all, you let me know, okay?

383
00:23:01,490 --> 00:23:02,740
Yeah, okay. I will.

384
00:23:04,500 --> 00:23:06,080
I'm having a baby!

385
00:23:09,330 --> 00:23:10,330
(WHOOPS)

386
00:23:11,380 --> 00:23:12,380
(WHOOPS MEEKLY)

387
00:23:23,640 --> 00:23:24,640
(YELLING)

388
00:23:33,270 --> 00:23:34,480
(TELEPHONE RINGING)

389
00:23:34,860 --> 00:23:35,820
Hello.

390
00:23:35,900 --> 00:23:37,900
What if the baby's
a hermaphrodite?

391
00:23:37,990 --> 00:23:38,950
What?

392
00:23:39,030 --> 00:23:40,610
A chick with a dick.

393
00:23:40,700 --> 00:23:43,030
I heard it happens
to about 2% of babies.

394
00:23:43,120 --> 00:23:44,410
Well, that's crazy.

395
00:23:44,490 --> 00:23:46,950
That would mean that 10 people from
our high school were hermaphrodites.

396
00:23:47,040 --> 00:23:48,120
Mommy. Mommy.
Mommy. Mommy.

397
00:23:48,210 --> 00:23:49,710
No, that sounds
about right, actually.

398
00:23:49,790 --> 00:23:52,460
You can't solve problems
by worrying about them.

399
00:23:52,540 --> 00:23:54,880
Is that Alex? What does she
want for her birthday?

400
00:23:54,960 --> 00:23:58,340
Karaoke Revolution
or a cell phone.

401
00:23:58,420 --> 00:23:59,760
She's four.

402
00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:03,890
Do you think it's too much if I
ask Angie to call me every day?

403
00:24:03,970 --> 00:24:05,810
She just seems so chaotic.

404
00:24:05,890 --> 00:24:07,060
I don't know
if she's eating right.

405
00:24:07,140 --> 00:24:08,390
Is she getting
enough exercise?

406
00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:10,100
Is she moving around too much?

407
00:24:10,190 --> 00:24:11,390
You're only six weeks in.

408
00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:14,190
You can't put her in a cage
and force-feed her.

409
00:24:14,270 --> 00:24:15,440
I know. I know.

410
00:24:15,520 --> 00:24:16,820
Expecting a baby?

411
00:24:17,570 --> 00:24:19,320
Did I tell you? I found a
location for the new store.

412
00:24:19,400 --> 00:24:20,490
Yeah, I have to
pitch it tomorrow.

413
00:24:20,570 --> 00:24:24,160
It's gonna be a girl. That's
what's making your hair so dry.

414
00:24:24,240 --> 00:24:25,660
Cash or credit?

415
00:24:25,740 --> 00:24:26,740
Cash.

416
00:24:32,540 --> 00:24:33,920
(KNOCKING AT DOOR)

417
00:24:46,350 --> 00:24:47,510
Oscar?

418
00:24:50,770 --> 00:24:52,560
You got baby mama drama.

419
00:24:52,640 --> 00:24:55,190
Hey, I left Carl.

420
00:24:55,270 --> 00:24:58,690
I found out he was effing around on
me, so we got into a huge fight.

421
00:24:58,780 --> 00:25:00,440
Things got
really physical.

422
00:25:00,530 --> 00:25:01,610
Oh, my God.
Are you okay?

423
00:25:01,700 --> 00:25:03,400
Yeah. I didn't
hit him too hard.

424
00:25:03,490 --> 00:25:05,870
Hey, I brought you
a picture of the baby.

425
00:25:05,950 --> 00:25:08,330
You know,
an ultrasound picture.

426
00:25:08,410 --> 00:25:09,870
Oh, my gosh.

427
00:25:12,620 --> 00:25:14,250
Looks like a squirrel.

428
00:25:15,380 --> 00:25:17,500
A cute, cute squirrel.

429
00:25:17,590 --> 00:25:19,880
Anyway, it's kind of early, so
you can't really see anything,

430
00:25:19,960 --> 00:25:22,760
but they took a picture of it just
to make sure it's growing right.

431
00:25:22,840 --> 00:25:24,090
They said all the parts
are good.

432
00:25:24,180 --> 00:25:26,300
Why didn't you tell me?
I would've been there.

433
00:25:26,390 --> 00:25:28,810
(SIGHS) I didn't want
to bother you.

434
00:25:31,100 --> 00:25:32,100
(SOBBING)

435
00:25:38,110 --> 00:25:40,980
Don't worry. This couch is more
comfortable than it looks.

436
00:25:41,070 --> 00:25:45,360
I also put a stack of clean
towels for you in the bathroom.

437
00:25:45,450 --> 00:25:47,700
Do you need
a toothbrush?

438
00:25:47,830 --> 00:25:50,910
Because I have some extras
that I keep for houseguests.

439
00:25:58,210 --> 00:26:00,000
Good night, squirrel.

440
00:26:07,300 --> 00:26:10,510
What we have here is our Boo
Boo Buster No-Slam Door, okay?

441
00:26:10,600 --> 00:26:11,600
Watch how this works.

442
00:26:11,680 --> 00:26:14,770
You can just slam it.
It bounces right back.

443
00:26:14,850 --> 00:26:16,980
So you can put your fingers right
on in there, and it wouldn't...

444
00:26:17,060 --> 00:26:19,110
Not you, it'll only
work for baby fingers.

445
00:26:19,190 --> 00:26:20,480
Okay.
Okay?

446
00:26:21,780 --> 00:26:24,240
Also included
in your premium package,

447
00:26:24,320 --> 00:26:26,780
we have
child protection everywhere.

448
00:26:28,030 --> 00:26:31,240
The doors, the door handles,
you have the cabinets,

449
00:26:32,370 --> 00:26:35,370
caps all over the outlets,
cabinets, everything.

450
00:26:35,460 --> 00:26:38,040
It's just baby-proof
all over the place.

451
00:26:38,130 --> 00:26:41,540
Shouldn't be a problem for
anybody over the age of seven.

452
00:26:47,220 --> 00:26:48,470
You sure have
done a great job

453
00:26:48,550 --> 00:26:50,300
getting an early jump
on your baby-proofing.

454
00:26:50,390 --> 00:26:51,600
Well, you guys
are the best in the city,

455
00:26:51,680 --> 00:26:53,140
and I didn't want to risk
being on a waiting list.

456
00:26:53,220 --> 00:26:57,270
True. But you can't be no more
than three, four months pregnant.

457
00:27:08,360 --> 00:27:10,570
There's something
wrong with your toilet.

458
00:27:11,070 --> 00:27:12,910
I'm sorry I broke
one of your rules.

459
00:27:12,990 --> 00:27:15,500
You peed in the sink. lsn't
that against everyone's rules?

460
00:27:15,580 --> 00:27:17,960
Only a crazy person
locks their toilet.

461
00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:20,170
It's for the baby.
It's safe.

462
00:27:20,250 --> 00:27:21,540
Please don't touch
anything else.

463
00:27:21,630 --> 00:27:22,630
(DOOR SLAMS)

464
00:27:33,510 --> 00:27:35,390
I'm here. I'm here. I'm sorry.

465
00:27:35,470 --> 00:27:37,020
45 minutes late.
This isn't like you.

466
00:27:37,100 --> 00:27:39,850
I'm sorry, Barry. I'm just a
little out of whack today.

467
00:27:39,940 --> 00:27:42,360
Want me to get Dr. Gary down here?
Give you a shot of bee pollen?

468
00:27:42,440 --> 00:27:44,520
No, thank you. I'm good.
Let's do this.

469
00:27:44,610 --> 00:27:46,440
Thank you
for waiting, everyone.

470
00:27:46,530 --> 00:27:49,400
This may look like a
dilapidated warehouse...

471
00:27:50,110 --> 00:27:52,740
(SINGING)
Lady Luck gets on my side

472
00:27:52,820 --> 00:27:55,450
We're gonna rock
this town alive

473
00:27:56,120 --> 00:27:57,290
I'II let her
rough me up

474
00:27:57,370 --> 00:27:58,370
Thanks, Oscar.

475
00:27:58,460 --> 00:27:59,410
She knocks me out

476
00:27:59,500 --> 00:28:03,000
She walks like she talks like
she talks like she walks

477
00:28:03,090 --> 00:28:04,290
She bangs, she bangs

478
00:28:04,380 --> 00:28:06,500
Hey.
What are you doing?

479
00:28:06,590 --> 00:28:07,670
What is this mess?

480
00:28:07,760 --> 00:28:08,800
Ch, baby, she moves, she moves

481
00:28:08,880 --> 00:28:11,050
This game is awesome.
Where did you get this?

482
00:28:11,130 --> 00:28:13,220
That's supposed to be
my niece's birthday present.

483
00:28:13,300 --> 00:28:14,300
Sorry.

484
00:28:14,390 --> 00:28:15,930
Angie, what kind of food is
this for a pregnant woman?

485
00:28:16,010 --> 00:28:19,640
Dr. Pepper, Pringles,
Tastykakes?

486
00:28:21,190 --> 00:28:22,730
Red Bull?

487
00:28:22,810 --> 00:28:25,270
Angie, Red Bull?

488
00:28:25,360 --> 00:28:28,780
You have to remember that you are
carrying something very precious.

489
00:28:28,860 --> 00:28:30,400
Like a little puppy.
Yeah.

490
00:28:30,490 --> 00:28:31,650
Yeah. Or a baby.

491
00:28:31,740 --> 00:28:36,370
What you eat, the baby eats. What
you listen to, the baby listens to.

492
00:28:36,450 --> 00:28:38,490
If you listen to DMX,
the baby comes out going...

493
00:28:38,580 --> 00:28:39,870
(GROWLING)

494
00:28:42,080 --> 00:28:43,330
Are those cigarettes?

495
00:28:43,420 --> 00:28:44,580
What? No. Where?

496
00:28:44,670 --> 00:28:47,250
Do you know how stupid
it is to smoke at all,

497
00:28:47,340 --> 00:28:48,750
let alone when
you are pregnant?

498
00:28:48,840 --> 00:28:50,420
I'm not smoking.
I swear, I'm not...

499
00:28:50,510 --> 00:28:51,800
(CELL PHONE RINGING)

500
00:28:54,510 --> 00:28:56,600
Why would you
answer my phone?

501
00:28:56,680 --> 00:28:58,260
Hello. BARRY: Kate,
we're moving forward.

502
00:28:58,350 --> 00:29:00,850
I think that that
is a great decision, Barry.

503
00:29:00,930 --> 00:29:05,100
Yes, let's get those facts and
figures, Barry, into the idea machine.

504
00:29:05,190 --> 00:29:06,270
We should close
in a couple of weeks.

505
00:29:06,360 --> 00:29:08,320
I want you to put together
a press conference.

506
00:29:08,400 --> 00:29:11,110
How about we start with a
little community outreach

507
00:29:11,190 --> 00:29:12,950
and get the people in the
neighborhood on our side,

508
00:29:13,030 --> 00:29:14,950
and then let the press
find us?

509
00:29:15,030 --> 00:29:18,280
That's why I'm a genius
for hiring people like you.

510
00:29:20,700 --> 00:29:22,660
All right, you.

511
00:29:22,750 --> 00:29:25,080
My job gives me access
to the most nutritious,

512
00:29:25,170 --> 00:29:26,330
chemical-free food
in the world.

513
00:29:26,420 --> 00:29:29,710
I don't want my kid born addicted
to high-fructose corn syrup.

514
00:29:29,800 --> 00:29:34,590
There is a thing called being too healthy.
That's what killed Bruce Lee.

515
00:29:34,720 --> 00:29:37,720
Really? Where did you read that?
The Weekly World Dum-Dum?

516
00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:42,430
All right. This is your folic acid
and this is your pre-natal vitamin.

517
00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:43,810
You're serious about this?

518
00:29:43,890 --> 00:29:46,600
I don't want my baby
to have a pinhead.

519
00:29:47,190 --> 00:29:48,480
I can't do it.

520
00:29:48,570 --> 00:29:50,980
I got it. lt's going...

521
00:29:51,070 --> 00:29:52,820
I can't swallow it.

522
00:29:56,780 --> 00:29:57,870
What is this?

523
00:29:57,950 --> 00:29:58,990
Water.

524
00:29:59,080 --> 00:30:00,830
It's horrible!

525
00:30:03,460 --> 00:30:05,330
I need a... No, I can't
put it in your butt.

526
00:30:05,420 --> 00:30:07,670
Angie, cats can do this.
Come on.

527
00:30:07,750 --> 00:30:09,540
It's in there.
Just try.

528
00:30:09,630 --> 00:30:10,920
Just relax.

529
00:30:11,000 --> 00:30:13,710
Close your eyes,
open your mouth,

530
00:30:14,760 --> 00:30:17,130
and do it! Swallow it.

531
00:30:17,260 --> 00:30:19,350
Take it. There you go!
You did it.

532
00:30:21,930 --> 00:30:23,850
Hey, I'm just
like a lot of you.

533
00:30:23,930 --> 00:30:28,650
I grew up at 52nd and Walnut.
I attended West Philly High.

534
00:30:28,730 --> 00:30:32,360
I smoked a joint with Hall & Cates
during the bicentennial, all of that.

535
00:30:32,440 --> 00:30:34,280
But unlike
a lot of you,

536
00:30:34,360 --> 00:30:36,950
I have since
traveled the world.

537
00:30:37,030 --> 00:30:40,530
I've had papaya on the
beach at Virgin Gorda.

538
00:30:40,620 --> 00:30:44,620
I've toasted pine nuts at the
mouth of an active volcano.

539
00:30:44,750 --> 00:30:48,790
I sat down with Native Americans
and had some amazing salmon.

540
00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:52,500
And I'm here to share
my experiences with you.

541
00:30:52,590 --> 00:30:55,090
You know, I was talking to Jimmy Buffett
this morning about trans fats...

542
00:30:55,170 --> 00:30:57,050
Barry, the time.

543
00:30:58,140 --> 00:30:59,760
Well, I'm sorry
I can't stay longer,

544
00:30:59,850 --> 00:31:02,050
but I have to swing by
my son's graduation.

545
00:31:02,140 --> 00:31:03,350
So I will turn you over

546
00:31:03,430 --> 00:31:07,020
to our vice president of development, Ms.
Kate Holbrook.

547
00:31:11,310 --> 00:31:12,310
Good morning and thank you...

548
00:31:12,400 --> 00:31:13,650
Will there be pedestrian
access during construction?

549
00:31:13,730 --> 00:31:15,530
How can you charge
$4 for one mango?

550
00:31:15,610 --> 00:31:16,990
MAN: What's your
carbon footprint?

551
00:31:17,070 --> 00:31:19,950
Ckay, how about we line up down
front here at the microphone?

552
00:31:20,030 --> 00:31:21,780
And I can take
your questions...

553
00:31:21,870 --> 00:31:24,790
And I can take your
questions one at a time.

554
00:31:25,950 --> 00:31:27,040
Hi.

555
00:31:27,830 --> 00:31:32,000
Rob Ackerman, WeBeSoOa Small
Business Owners' Association,

556
00:31:32,090 --> 00:31:35,500
and I also own
Super Fruity Smoothies.

557
00:31:35,590 --> 00:31:37,260
It's like Jamba Juice.

558
00:31:37,340 --> 00:31:40,430
No, it's not. It's not
like Jamba Juice at all.

559
00:31:41,890 --> 00:31:43,260
I think you've been
to my store.

560
00:31:43,350 --> 00:31:45,100
Yes, I have. I remember.

561
00:31:45,180 --> 00:31:47,730
Did you ever find that apartment
you were looking for?

562
00:31:48,850 --> 00:31:50,350
Not yet. No.

563
00:31:50,440 --> 00:31:53,020
Here's my question. Exactly
what portion of your profits

564
00:31:53,110 --> 00:31:54,270
are gonna go
towards rebuilding

565
00:31:54,360 --> 00:31:57,110
and the revitalization
of our community?

566
00:31:57,190 --> 00:31:58,440
ALL: Yes!

567
00:32:00,910 --> 00:32:03,200
Thank you for that question.

568
00:32:08,000 --> 00:32:10,710
Those are free, by the way.
You don't have to sneak them.

569
00:32:10,790 --> 00:32:13,630
All of this stuff
is our gift to you.

570
00:32:13,710 --> 00:32:14,920
Hey, Kate.

571
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:16,630
Hi.

572
00:32:16,710 --> 00:32:17,840
What a spread.

573
00:32:17,920 --> 00:32:18,960
Thanks.

574
00:32:19,050 --> 00:32:20,590
So, I had one last
question for you.

575
00:32:20,680 --> 00:32:21,880
Okay.

576
00:32:21,970 --> 00:32:24,640
You never told me how
you liked the smoothie.

577
00:32:24,720 --> 00:32:27,640
Well, a little too much
banana for me.

578
00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:29,060
Wow.

579
00:32:30,020 --> 00:32:30,980
You know,
Mr. Ackerman...

580
00:32:31,060 --> 00:32:32,140
No, no, no.

581
00:32:32,230 --> 00:32:34,440
Mr. Ackerman's my dog.
You gotta call me Rob.

582
00:32:34,520 --> 00:32:37,150
Okay, Rob. I really
don't want any tension

583
00:32:37,230 --> 00:32:38,980
with the Small Business
Owners' Association.

584
00:32:39,070 --> 00:32:41,240
So I would be happy to sit
down with you some time and...

585
00:32:41,320 --> 00:32:42,660
You asking me
out on a date?

586
00:32:42,740 --> 00:32:43,780
No.

587
00:32:43,870 --> 00:32:46,240
You sure? 'Cause you
lied to me once already.

588
00:32:46,330 --> 00:32:49,160
Yes, I'm sure.

589
00:32:49,250 --> 00:32:51,080
See you around.

590
00:32:52,000 --> 00:32:56,090
And then he asked me if I was asking
him out, and I was like, "What?"

591
00:32:56,170 --> 00:32:57,340
CAROLINE ON PHONE: Is he cute?

592
00:32:57,420 --> 00:32:58,750
Yes, but you're
missing the point.

593
00:32:58,880 --> 00:33:00,510
(CALL WAITING CHIMES)

594
00:33:00,590 --> 00:33:02,880
Hold on, Caroline.

595
00:33:02,970 --> 00:33:04,010
Angie?

596
00:33:04,090 --> 00:33:06,180
ANGIE: I'm starving!

597
00:33:06,260 --> 00:33:07,300
Well, look in
the refrigerator,

598
00:33:07,390 --> 00:33:10,560
there's a big container of
Monster Health Pea Soup.

599
00:33:10,640 --> 00:33:13,690
This looks really weird and healthy.
I don't like it.

600
00:33:13,770 --> 00:33:15,100
It's good for you.

601
00:33:15,190 --> 00:33:16,230
I'm not trying
to be dramatic,

602
00:33:16,310 --> 00:33:18,940
but I would rather be shot in the
face than eat this stupid food.

603
00:33:19,150 --> 00:33:21,900
Angie, just eat it, okay? Bye.

604
00:33:21,990 --> 00:33:26,450
Caroline? She's crazy. lt is
like living with a child.

605
00:33:26,740 --> 00:33:28,490
(CHILDREN SHOUTING) Well, you
know, you will literally be

606
00:33:28,620 --> 00:33:30,120
living with a child soon.

607
00:33:30,160 --> 00:33:31,870
(CHILD SCREAMING) Maybe you
need to just get used to it.

608
00:33:31,960 --> 00:33:33,290
Alex! Alex!

609
00:33:33,460 --> 00:33:36,630
Wait. I'm an adult. She's an adult.
We will work this out.

610
00:33:37,880 --> 00:33:38,880
(MAN CHATTERING ON CD)

611
00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:42,800
You know, studies show that babies can
learn a second language in the womb.

612
00:33:42,880 --> 00:33:45,550
You know, you should play an English
tape, so it can come out talking,

613
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:47,970
and it can be in commercials,
and you'll make a lot of money.

614
00:33:48,050 --> 00:33:51,890
MAN: Next.
The elephant has big ears.

615
00:33:52,180 --> 00:33:54,180
(MAN CONTINUES CHATTERING
IN SPANISH)

616
00:33:54,270 --> 00:33:57,810
Your CD's skipping.
I'm gonna watch TV instead.

617
00:34:01,740 --> 00:34:04,570
Oh, man. This show's awesome. In this
next clip is a dad playing baseball

618
00:34:04,650 --> 00:34:05,650
with his son.

619
00:34:06,280 --> 00:34:07,660
That kid's gonna
hit his dad in the nuts.

620
00:34:07,740 --> 00:34:09,030
Beautiful day! What could
possibly go wrong?

621
00:34:09,120 --> 00:34:11,290
Hey, have you seen
this one before?

622
00:34:11,370 --> 00:34:14,160
You have a kid with a Wiffleball
bat and a dad with a crotch.

623
00:34:14,250 --> 00:34:16,370
Proudest moment in any
father-son relationship.

624
00:34:16,460 --> 00:34:19,750
You know, it's not gonna be
funny if you ruin the ending!

625
00:34:19,840 --> 00:34:22,250
Here comes the pitch!

626
00:34:24,010 --> 00:34:27,180
It is!
It's still funny!

627
00:34:29,850 --> 00:34:31,140
Oh, man.

628
00:34:31,220 --> 00:34:34,430
Did you just stick your gum
under my coffee table?

629
00:34:34,520 --> 00:34:36,350
I don't know. What do you
mean, you don't know?

630
00:34:36,440 --> 00:34:37,940
Do you think you're at
an Arby's right now?

631
00:34:38,020 --> 00:34:39,810
You know what? I wish
I was at an Arby's.

632
00:34:39,900 --> 00:34:42,860
'Cause there's better food
and cooler people there.

633
00:34:42,940 --> 00:34:44,110
(GASPS)

634
00:34:44,190 --> 00:34:46,200
Did you stick all
this gum under here?

635
00:34:46,280 --> 00:34:47,990
I don't know!

636
00:34:48,070 --> 00:34:49,910
Maybe you stuck
some of it under there.

637
00:34:49,990 --> 00:34:52,830
Yeah, actually
you might be right,

638
00:34:52,910 --> 00:34:54,790
because sometimes when I
work a really long day,

639
00:34:54,870 --> 00:34:57,960
I like to come home and chew a
huge wad of Bubblicious gum

640
00:34:58,040 --> 00:35:00,540
and stick it under my reclaimed
BarnWood coffee table!

641
00:35:00,630 --> 00:35:02,250
Bitch,
I don't know your life!

642
00:35:02,340 --> 00:35:05,010
All right, ladies,
there's no need to yell.

643
00:35:05,090 --> 00:35:07,930
Well, the mystery remains as to
who put the gum under there.

644
00:35:08,010 --> 00:35:09,050
No, it doesn't.

645
00:35:09,140 --> 00:35:12,220
Kate, you're used to
being the boss,

646
00:35:12,310 --> 00:35:16,640
and, Angie, being pregnant makes
you feel vulnerable and sensitive.

647
00:35:16,730 --> 00:35:19,520
I know my hormones are on a
rollercoaster right now.

648
00:35:19,600 --> 00:35:21,230
Are you saying...

649
00:35:21,310 --> 00:35:24,320
That's right.
I'm expecting again.

650
00:35:26,070 --> 00:35:28,200
Expecting what,
a social security check?

651
00:35:28,280 --> 00:35:30,110
It's weird, isn't it?
Yeah.

652
00:35:30,200 --> 00:35:32,070
These conflicts are normal.

653
00:35:32,160 --> 00:35:38,120
This is a highly unusual relationship, and
that's what this support group is for.

654
00:35:38,210 --> 00:35:39,920
Jonathan would
like to share again.

655
00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:41,750
I mean, I'm only saying
because this reminded me

656
00:35:41,840 --> 00:35:45,590
of something I was journaling,
just the other day.

657
00:35:45,670 --> 00:35:48,760
I feel really bad because Karen
and I are fighting a lot,

658
00:35:48,840 --> 00:35:52,930
because I think she's
becoming morbidly obese.

659
00:35:53,010 --> 00:35:56,060
And I keep reminding him
that she is pregnant.

660
00:35:56,140 --> 00:35:59,440
And then I realized
that I am...

661
00:36:02,440 --> 00:36:05,980
I'm... No.
I am... Okay.

662
00:36:06,070 --> 00:36:10,530
I'm anorexic, and it's really
hard, because she's so fat.

663
00:36:10,610 --> 00:36:13,620
And l... l love
Christopher so much,

664
00:36:13,700 --> 00:36:16,870
and he's fat, and I'm afraid
the baby's gonna be fat.

665
00:36:16,950 --> 00:36:20,290
And it's just me
and two fatties.

666
00:36:20,370 --> 00:36:23,750
I'm proud of you, Jonathan.
Thank you for sharing that.

667
00:36:23,840 --> 00:36:25,250
Yeah, that's a...

668
00:36:25,340 --> 00:36:26,800
CHAFFEE: Thank you.

669
00:36:28,090 --> 00:36:30,050
Anyone else?

670
00:36:30,130 --> 00:36:32,220
I can go.
Dave?

671
00:36:32,300 --> 00:36:37,140
The wife and I are Methodists.
Ashley here is a Wiccan.

672
00:36:38,060 --> 00:36:43,060
It's kind of like a witch.
They have stores, I think.

673
00:36:43,150 --> 00:36:49,230
But, you know, at first, I was a little
worried about a witch carrying my child,

674
00:36:49,320 --> 00:36:53,530
but I came around to the idea,
or she put a spell on me.

675
00:36:54,240 --> 00:36:55,240
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

676
00:36:55,330 --> 00:36:57,450
Did you do that, Ashley?

677
00:36:59,370 --> 00:37:00,330
I'm sorry.

678
00:37:00,460 --> 00:37:02,370
I'd like to share something.
CHAFFEE: Please.

679
00:37:02,460 --> 00:37:04,420
Okay, I don't know,
like, all the therapy terms...

680
00:37:04,500 --> 00:37:06,920
Well, I don't know the therapy terms,
either. I don't go to therapy.

681
00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:10,090
Yeah, but I'd just like to say that
Kate is always up in my business.

682
00:37:10,170 --> 00:37:12,930
Well, when someone falls asleep
with a curling iron in their hair,

683
00:37:13,010 --> 00:37:16,300
it becomes necessary to insert
yourself in their business.

684
00:37:16,390 --> 00:37:18,140
That happened two times!

685
00:37:18,220 --> 00:37:22,390
Angie, bottom line,
you're carrying Kate's baby,

686
00:37:22,480 --> 00:37:25,270
and you do
wanna get paid, right?

687
00:37:25,360 --> 00:37:26,560
Yeah.

688
00:37:26,650 --> 00:37:29,610
That means that Kate
does deserve some input.

689
00:37:29,690 --> 00:37:33,400
But, Kate, you must remember that
a surrogate is not your employee,

690
00:37:33,490 --> 00:37:34,570
but your partner.

691
00:37:34,660 --> 00:37:38,240
Yeah, Kate, we're partners,
like Tom and Jerry.

692
00:37:38,330 --> 00:37:39,740
Tom and Jerry
hate each other.

693
00:37:39,830 --> 00:37:41,910
What? They love each other!
What show are you watching?

694
00:37:42,000 --> 00:37:43,040
They're a cat and a mouse.

695
00:37:43,120 --> 00:37:44,410
They have
so much fun together!

696
00:37:44,500 --> 00:37:45,870
Children in Japan
can understand that.

697
00:37:45,960 --> 00:37:47,210
You are dead wrong.

698
00:37:47,290 --> 00:37:50,710
I want you two to
spend more time together.

699
00:37:50,800 --> 00:37:51,840
(SCOFFING)

700
00:37:51,880 --> 00:37:53,800
That's impossible. We're always together.
I don't... Yeah.

701
00:37:53,880 --> 00:37:55,970
Let Angie help you
get ready for the baby.

702
00:37:56,050 --> 00:37:58,470
Decorate the nursery
together, pick out a crib.

703
00:37:58,560 --> 00:38:01,640
Do all the things you would
do if you were pregnant,

704
00:38:01,720 --> 00:38:03,430
just do them with Angie.

705
00:38:05,150 --> 00:38:07,860
Wake up, partner.
It's time for birthing class.

706
00:38:07,940 --> 00:38:09,480
Yay.

707
00:38:09,770 --> 00:38:11,820
Welcome to
The Birthing Center.

708
00:38:11,900 --> 00:38:13,030
In this birthing class,

709
00:38:13,110 --> 00:38:15,860
we are going to help
you new mommies and daddies,

710
00:38:15,950 --> 00:38:19,120
and our mommies and mommies,
lesbian lovers...

711
00:38:19,200 --> 00:38:20,200
No.
No.

712
00:38:20,290 --> 00:38:23,410
...prepare for
that marathon of labor.

713
00:38:23,500 --> 00:38:24,910
Quick question
before we start.

714
00:38:25,000 --> 00:38:29,170
How many of you are planning
on doing natural childbirth?

715
00:38:29,250 --> 00:38:32,670
That's a good show of hands. That's
so great, you're all so great.

716
00:38:32,760 --> 00:38:38,390
And how many of you are planning
on using toxic Western medications

717
00:38:38,470 --> 00:38:41,680
to drug your baby for your
own selfish comfort? Anyone?

718
00:38:41,760 --> 00:38:43,600
(WHOOPING)

719
00:38:48,980 --> 00:38:53,030
Now this, this is
the Lexus of strollers.

720
00:38:53,110 --> 00:38:55,990
Got an iPod adapter, leather trim.
Check that out, feel that.

721
00:38:56,070 --> 00:38:57,990
Back of your hand,
back of your hand.

722
00:38:58,070 --> 00:39:01,070
Now, what's the first word you think
of when you think of stroller?

723
00:39:01,160 --> 00:39:02,450
Baby.

724
00:39:02,540 --> 00:39:04,200
Okay, what's the second
word you think of?

725
00:39:04,290 --> 00:39:06,210
Infant.
No.

726
00:39:06,290 --> 00:39:09,960
It's "top of the line safety
features." Check this out.

727
00:39:11,630 --> 00:39:13,170
I'll take it.

728
00:39:14,260 --> 00:39:16,720
(SINGING)
I'm never gonna dance again

729
00:39:16,800 --> 00:39:20,220
Guilty feet
have got no rhythm

730
00:39:20,300 --> 00:39:22,800
Though it's easy to pretend

731
00:39:22,890 --> 00:39:26,060
I know you're not a fool

732
00:39:26,140 --> 00:39:27,560
What is the point
of that game?

733
00:39:27,640 --> 00:39:31,020
It gives you points depending
on how good you sing.

734
00:39:31,110 --> 00:39:32,060
I'm the highest scorer.

735
00:39:32,150 --> 00:39:34,650
You're the only one
that's ever played it.

736
00:39:34,730 --> 00:39:36,280
What is that smell?

737
00:39:36,360 --> 00:39:37,740
I'm dying my roots.

738
00:39:37,820 --> 00:39:39,740
I was just trying
to get some highlights.

739
00:39:39,820 --> 00:39:41,200
So many chemicals!

740
00:39:41,280 --> 00:39:43,200
You're a brunette,
you don't understand!

741
00:39:43,280 --> 00:39:44,620
You're a brunette!

742
00:39:44,700 --> 00:39:46,830
I was blond
when I was a kid!

743
00:39:48,750 --> 00:39:52,000
I'm clean.
I'm clean!

744
00:39:54,210 --> 00:39:56,090
(MAN SPEAKING SPANISH ON CD)

745
00:40:00,680 --> 00:40:01,840
Hi.

746
00:40:03,390 --> 00:40:06,350
I'm sorry, I think I may
have overreacted back there.

747
00:40:06,430 --> 00:40:07,850
You think?

748
00:40:08,520 --> 00:40:12,150
It's just this whole thing
is very important to me.

749
00:40:12,230 --> 00:40:13,770
And frankly, it makes
me a little bit crazy

750
00:40:13,860 --> 00:40:15,820
that you get to feel it
and experience it,

751
00:40:15,900 --> 00:40:17,780
while I just watch.

752
00:40:22,450 --> 00:40:25,450
And I might be
a little bit jealous.

753
00:40:25,540 --> 00:40:28,870
Jealous? How could you
be jealous of me?

754
00:40:30,670 --> 00:40:33,000
I'm sorry
I called you stupid.

755
00:40:35,840 --> 00:40:37,960
I'm sorry I farted
into your purse.

756
00:40:38,050 --> 00:40:39,420
What?

757
00:40:45,970 --> 00:40:50,060
I found this shell while running
barefoot through the Toronto airport.

758
00:40:51,560 --> 00:40:54,980
I want you to make our flagship
store like this shell.

759
00:40:58,570 --> 00:41:01,320
You want it
to look like the shell?

760
00:41:02,070 --> 00:41:03,990
You know, Rick, when you talk
to me in that tone of voice,

761
00:41:04,070 --> 00:41:05,910
I get incredibly angry.

762
00:41:05,990 --> 00:41:06,990
I couldn't have
been more specific...

763
00:41:07,080 --> 00:41:08,830
You want it to have
the essence of the shell.

764
00:41:08,910 --> 00:41:13,920
Yes, that's it, exactly. Thank you, Kate.
I'm sorry I flipped, Rick.

765
00:41:14,000 --> 00:41:16,460
Give me the essence
of this shell.

766
00:41:20,090 --> 00:41:21,840
As your pregnancy progresses,

767
00:41:21,920 --> 00:41:24,680
your partner can help you
prep your perineum

768
00:41:24,760 --> 00:41:27,390
for the great stretch
of delivery.

769
00:41:28,890 --> 00:41:33,190
Massage the area
daily with a little EVOO

770
00:41:33,270 --> 00:41:36,900
to help you stretch
and prevent tearing.

771
00:41:36,980 --> 00:41:38,360
What is she talking about?

772
00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:41,940
I think she wants me to rub
olive oil on your taint.

773
00:41:43,860 --> 00:41:47,200
Is it cool if maybe I just spray
a little PAM down in that area,

774
00:41:47,280 --> 00:41:49,910
right before
the baby comes out?

775
00:41:49,990 --> 00:41:52,540
You have to admit
it's a valid suggestion.

776
00:41:53,790 --> 00:41:55,830
ANGIE: So, are you pissed
that no one ever married you?

777
00:41:55,920 --> 00:41:58,920
Well, I almost got married
once to a guy named Scott.

778
00:41:59,000 --> 00:42:01,550
We were together
for six and a half years.

779
00:42:01,630 --> 00:42:03,510
Damn, just shy
of common-law.

780
00:42:03,590 --> 00:42:06,720
Yeah, actually. He was the
only guy I ever lived with.

781
00:42:06,800 --> 00:42:10,600
So now he has three kids, beautiful
kids, with another woman,

782
00:42:10,680 --> 00:42:12,930
an old co-worker
of mine, actually.

783
00:42:13,020 --> 00:42:14,890
That sucks.

784
00:42:14,980 --> 00:42:16,060
You know what?
Don't worry about it,

785
00:42:16,150 --> 00:42:19,230
'cause you're super-successful,
and you have sweet-ass legs.

786
00:42:19,320 --> 00:42:21,480
Thank you, I think.

787
00:42:21,570 --> 00:42:23,440
I had one good boyfriend
before Carl.

788
00:42:23,530 --> 00:42:24,570
Really?

789
00:42:24,650 --> 00:42:26,150
Donny Landis.

790
00:42:26,240 --> 00:42:29,160
We used to work at Blimpie
together when we were 16,

791
00:42:29,240 --> 00:42:31,280
and sit and eat pickles
in the back.

792
00:42:31,370 --> 00:42:35,080
He waited a whole month
before he touched my boobs.

793
00:42:35,160 --> 00:42:36,830
Then he went
to the University of Scranton,

794
00:42:36,920 --> 00:42:39,290
and I never heard
from him again.

795
00:42:39,380 --> 00:42:41,420
He was my Justin Timberlake.

796
00:42:41,500 --> 00:42:43,420
Angie, you can still have
a totally different life.

797
00:42:43,510 --> 00:42:45,420
You're a very
smart person.

798
00:42:45,510 --> 00:42:46,590
Thanks.

799
00:42:47,720 --> 00:42:50,050
(MUSIC PLAYING
ON KARAOKE MACHINE)

800
00:42:50,140 --> 00:42:52,310
KATE: I figured out how to beat
you at this game, by the way.

801
00:42:52,390 --> 00:42:53,890
Yeah, that's what it's about.

802
00:42:53,980 --> 00:42:56,020
There's a lot of techniques
that you can use.

803
00:42:56,100 --> 00:42:58,810
(SINGING OFF-KEY) I come
home in the morning light

804
00:42:58,900 --> 00:43:03,400
My mother says When you
gonna live your life right?

805
00:43:03,480 --> 00:43:04,780
You gotta hold the
note till the end.

806
00:43:04,860 --> 00:43:07,400
We're not
the fortunate ones

807
00:43:07,490 --> 00:43:10,820
And girls just
want to have fun

808
00:43:10,910 --> 00:43:15,870
Oh, girls just
want to have fun

809
00:43:15,960 --> 00:43:17,960
Come on,
get up here.

810
00:43:18,040 --> 00:43:21,840
Just wanna,
they just wanna

811
00:43:21,920 --> 00:43:25,510
They just wanna,
they just wanna

812
00:43:25,590 --> 00:43:27,470
Girls!
Girls!

813
00:43:27,550 --> 00:43:34,220
Girls just wanna
have fun

814
00:43:35,560 --> 00:43:36,640
I think that was harmony.

815
00:43:36,730 --> 00:43:39,100
That was harmony!

816
00:43:39,480 --> 00:43:42,900
Look at her.
She's got good jugs.

817
00:43:42,980 --> 00:43:44,820
My avatar is dressed
like a whore.

818
00:43:45,440 --> 00:43:46,900
(POP MUSIC PLAYING)

819
00:44:06,630 --> 00:44:08,760
So, what do you
wanna talk about, Carl?

820
00:44:08,840 --> 00:44:13,010
I want you to come home.
Baby, I miss you.

821
00:44:13,100 --> 00:44:14,800
I haven't had sex
in two weeks.

822
00:44:14,890 --> 00:44:16,890
I've been gone a month.

823
00:44:16,970 --> 00:44:17,970
Whatever.

824
00:44:18,060 --> 00:44:20,100
Carl, after spending
time with Kate,

825
00:44:20,190 --> 00:44:22,980
I kind of feel like I can evaluate
the direction my life is going,

826
00:44:23,060 --> 00:44:26,860
and I feel like that direction
does not include you. Carl!

827
00:44:26,940 --> 00:44:29,360
You and your best friend, Kate?
I got bad news.

828
00:44:29,450 --> 00:44:31,530
She's using you
to have a baby.

829
00:44:31,610 --> 00:44:33,570
You think you guys would
be friends in real life?

830
00:44:33,660 --> 00:44:37,120
She's a business lady.
It's just business.

831
00:44:38,960 --> 00:44:40,370
You don't even
know her, Carl.

832
00:44:40,460 --> 00:44:42,830
All right, you got no right
to cut me out of this deal.

833
00:44:42,920 --> 00:44:43,920
Who's the one
who said you should go

834
00:44:44,000 --> 00:44:46,710
into the baby-making business
in the first place? Me.

835
00:44:46,800 --> 00:44:49,880
When the pee-stick said no, who's the one
who figured out how to keep things going?

836
00:44:49,970 --> 00:44:51,380
Me.

837
00:44:51,470 --> 00:44:53,970
You should...
Here you go.

838
00:44:54,050 --> 00:44:57,390
You shouldn't have forged
that pregnancy test, Carl.

839
00:44:58,430 --> 00:45:01,690
Maybe you should've actually gotten
pregnant like you were supposed to.

840
00:45:01,770 --> 00:45:04,810
You did a dumb thing, moving
in with that lady. Real dumb.

841
00:45:04,900 --> 00:45:06,480
We were supposed to
forge the test,

842
00:45:06,570 --> 00:45:08,320
send her the ultrasound
picture in the mail,

843
00:45:08,400 --> 00:45:10,740
and then cash the checks.
One, two, three.

844
00:45:10,820 --> 00:45:13,200
The ultrasound looked like
a squirrel, by the way.

845
00:45:13,280 --> 00:45:16,280
'Cause it was a squirrel. That's
all I could find on the lnternet.

846
00:45:16,370 --> 00:45:20,080
Look, Katie's gonna notice.
You're not getting bigger.

847
00:45:20,160 --> 00:45:21,330
When you go
to the doctor's office,

848
00:45:21,410 --> 00:45:23,790
and you take the test,
she's gonna know.

849
00:45:23,870 --> 00:45:27,170
Sweetie, you're not smart
enough to pull this off.

850
00:45:31,380 --> 00:45:34,800
Excuse me. These
are mine, right?

851
00:45:34,890 --> 00:45:37,100
How far along are you?

852
00:45:37,930 --> 00:45:38,970
I'm pretty pregnant.

853
00:45:39,060 --> 00:45:40,640
She's 14 weeks.

854
00:45:40,730 --> 00:45:44,850
Me, too! You're so lucky.
You're not showing at all.

855
00:45:44,940 --> 00:45:46,770
Nice talking to you.

856
00:45:55,030 --> 00:45:56,530
(PUNK MUSIC PLAYING)

857
00:46:12,170 --> 00:46:13,170
(RETCHING)

858
00:46:13,970 --> 00:46:15,220
Angie?

859
00:46:16,550 --> 00:46:18,640
I'm going to work.
Feel better, okay?

860
00:46:18,720 --> 00:46:21,350
I'm done. No.
I'm not done!

861
00:46:23,350 --> 00:46:24,430
Morning sickness.

862
00:46:24,520 --> 00:46:25,560
Sounds like she's dying.

863
00:46:26,150 --> 00:46:28,690
Just so pregnant.

864
00:46:33,860 --> 00:46:35,400
Right there.

865
00:46:35,490 --> 00:46:36,530
What?

866
00:46:36,570 --> 00:46:38,200
On your hand.
Where?

867
00:46:38,240 --> 00:46:39,870
Right... Yup... See.
Right. Where?

868
00:46:39,950 --> 00:46:43,330
Girl, that's vomit!

869
00:46:43,410 --> 00:46:45,500
Do something about them
vomit chunks, girl!

870
00:46:45,580 --> 00:46:47,040
Okay. God!

871
00:47:01,640 --> 00:47:03,470
I love it, Kate.

872
00:47:03,560 --> 00:47:07,190
I wanna reward you with five minutes
of uninterrupted eye contact.

873
00:47:07,270 --> 00:47:08,270
Yay.

874
00:47:18,110 --> 00:47:19,110
(CLEARING THROAT)

875
00:47:31,920 --> 00:47:34,630
You can stay, Rick,
if you... Okay.

876
00:47:39,220 --> 00:47:41,010
(CELL PHONE RINGING)

877
00:47:46,270 --> 00:47:47,640
(RINGING CONTINUES)

878
00:47:48,310 --> 00:47:52,730
ln the last 24 hours, I got clearances
on the titles and the permits,

879
00:47:52,820 --> 00:47:56,110
tax-incentive grants from
the city and the states,

880
00:47:56,190 --> 00:47:59,900
and Barry on the plane
to surf camp.

881
00:47:59,990 --> 00:48:01,030
I'm at the top of my game.

882
00:48:01,120 --> 00:48:02,660
That's great!

883
00:48:02,740 --> 00:48:04,910
Let's do something.
Let's celebrate!

884
00:48:04,990 --> 00:48:08,830
I thought we could order food
and watch this DVD that I got.

885
00:48:08,910 --> 00:48:11,370
It's a British documentary
about a woman

886
00:48:11,460 --> 00:48:15,340
who gives birth to a 1
5-pound baby, vaginally.

887
00:48:15,420 --> 00:48:18,340
Can't wait to not watch this.
You and I need to go out.

888
00:48:18,420 --> 00:48:20,260
Let's go clubbing.
Clubbing?

889
00:48:20,340 --> 00:48:23,890
You need to get out of your comfort zone.
Go meet some dudes.

890
00:48:23,970 --> 00:48:26,600
Although, I do have a new ginger body
splash that I've been dying to try.

891
00:48:26,680 --> 00:48:27,850
Wow!
Yes.

892
00:48:27,930 --> 00:48:29,560
That's really frisky.
Let's do it.

893
00:48:29,890 --> 00:48:32,020
WOMAN ON CD:
Congratulations!

894
00:48:34,940 --> 00:48:36,400
(PUMPING AIR)

895
00:48:57,840 --> 00:48:58,800
You're wearing that?

896
00:48:58,880 --> 00:49:01,380
Well, we are going
to a nightclub.

897
00:49:03,930 --> 00:49:05,890
(HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING)

898
00:49:13,900 --> 00:49:16,520
Ain't no good
gonna come of this.

899
00:49:22,110 --> 00:49:24,410
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

900
00:49:24,490 --> 00:49:25,950
ANGIE: This place is awesome.

901
00:49:26,030 --> 00:49:30,200
I haven't been to a place
like this since ever.

902
00:49:30,290 --> 00:49:35,670
Okay. She'll have a double
margarita, no ice, and two of those.

903
00:49:35,750 --> 00:49:39,630
And I'll have
a bottle of water.

904
00:49:41,590 --> 00:49:43,340
Hey, let's dance!
Okay!

905
00:49:43,720 --> 00:49:45,590
(HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING)

906
00:49:58,650 --> 00:49:59,690
Stop framing
your face.

907
00:49:59,780 --> 00:50:00,980
Okay.

908
00:50:01,070 --> 00:50:02,400
I think it's good!

909
00:50:02,490 --> 00:50:03,700
It's not.

910
00:50:14,750 --> 00:50:16,580
Here, drink this!

911
00:50:19,380 --> 00:50:21,210
Oh, my God!
That is strong.

912
00:50:21,300 --> 00:50:22,800
Is it?
Try this one.

913
00:50:25,760 --> 00:50:26,760
That is stronger!

914
00:50:26,840 --> 00:50:28,760
I know, I know.
Do this shot.

915
00:50:28,850 --> 00:50:31,470
Why am I doing this?

916
00:50:32,310 --> 00:50:33,310
(EXCLAIMS)

917
00:50:44,820 --> 00:50:45,860
Are you having fun?

918
00:50:45,950 --> 00:50:47,160
I am!

919
00:50:47,240 --> 00:50:49,240
You know what
I've always wanted to do?

920
00:50:49,330 --> 00:50:51,530
This one is for the ladies!

921
00:50:55,000 --> 00:50:56,540
(SENTIMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)

922
00:50:57,580 --> 00:51:00,500
All right!
Good slow jam!

923
00:51:01,300 --> 00:51:02,800
Old-school!

924
00:51:03,510 --> 00:51:04,840
(ALL BOOING)

925
00:51:05,880 --> 00:51:07,300
All right! All right! Hey! Hey!

926
00:51:07,380 --> 00:51:10,430
Listen to it!
It's a really beautiful song!

927
00:51:11,810 --> 00:51:18,020
If I was alone, I mean, not pregnant,
I would be macking on all of this.

928
00:51:18,850 --> 00:51:21,190
There's nobody here
I would ever go out with.

929
00:51:21,270 --> 00:51:23,780
Are you serious?

930
00:51:23,860 --> 00:51:25,780
What about that guy?

931
00:51:26,740 --> 00:51:29,700
He looks like a laundry
bag full of meat.

932
00:51:30,660 --> 00:51:33,160
What about that guy over there?
He's wearing a suit.

933
00:51:33,240 --> 00:51:34,240
It's denim.

934
00:51:34,330 --> 00:51:36,000
You're so picky!

935
00:51:36,080 --> 00:51:40,500
Well, at least he's not a
grade-A dork like that guy.

936
00:51:40,580 --> 00:51:42,130
Oh, my God, Scott!

937
00:51:42,210 --> 00:51:43,290
Who?

938
00:51:43,380 --> 00:51:47,630
That's my ex-boyfriend, Scott, that
I told you about. Why is he here?

939
00:51:47,720 --> 00:51:48,970
You went out
with him?

940
00:51:49,050 --> 00:51:50,300
I did.

941
00:51:50,390 --> 00:51:51,680
Why?

942
00:51:51,760 --> 00:51:53,260
He's beautiful.

943
00:51:53,350 --> 00:51:55,600
Where?
Look at his mustache!

944
00:51:55,680 --> 00:51:57,560
I know!

945
00:51:57,640 --> 00:51:58,640
I'm gonna go say hi.

946
00:51:58,730 --> 00:52:01,480
No, don't,
it's a bad...

947
00:52:01,560 --> 00:52:04,070
Kate, I'm gonna
watch your drink.

948
00:52:07,820 --> 00:52:09,360
Hi, Scott.

949
00:52:09,450 --> 00:52:12,450
Kate, my gosh, you look great!
What are you doing here?

950
00:52:12,530 --> 00:52:14,410
I'm just clubbing.

951
00:52:14,490 --> 00:52:15,990
You remember
my wife, Jean?

952
00:52:16,080 --> 00:52:17,160
Oh, yeah.

953
00:52:17,250 --> 00:52:19,330
Hi, Jean, how are you?

954
00:52:20,580 --> 00:52:21,750
How's everything?

955
00:52:21,830 --> 00:52:24,710
It's great. We just bought
a house in Bucks County.

956
00:52:24,800 --> 00:52:27,670
I'm still doing stuff
for Doctors Without Borders.

957
00:52:27,760 --> 00:52:31,470
Recently, we took in
some Hurricane Katrina dogs.

958
00:52:31,550 --> 00:52:35,220
And I was in a bicycle accident
that made my penis bigger.

959
00:52:36,350 --> 00:52:37,350
How are you?

960
00:52:37,430 --> 00:52:39,180
I'm doing awesome.

961
00:52:39,270 --> 00:52:44,310
I've just been working a lot, and I
cannot have babies, it turns out.

962
00:52:44,400 --> 00:52:46,730
So, good job
picking this one.

963
00:52:46,820 --> 00:52:51,280
What it is, actually, is my uterus
is T-shaped, which is like...

964
00:52:52,030 --> 00:52:54,530
So, but actually, funny story.
See that...

965
00:52:54,620 --> 00:52:56,530
Okay, see that little
blonde woman, over here?

966
00:52:56,620 --> 00:52:59,080
I am paying her to have...
Hi. Stop talking now.

967
00:52:59,160 --> 00:53:00,750
Bye, Jean.

968
00:53:02,120 --> 00:53:04,210
Why does he
make me so crazy?

969
00:53:04,290 --> 00:53:06,290
Forget about him. He dumped you.
He's an asshole.

970
00:53:06,380 --> 00:53:08,130
No,
he's a good person.

971
00:53:08,210 --> 00:53:10,340
No,
you're a good person.

972
00:53:10,420 --> 00:53:12,970
You don't need another good person
around you. That's your thing.

973
00:53:13,050 --> 00:53:14,470
He's trying to
take that from you!

974
00:53:14,550 --> 00:53:17,430
He wanted to marry me, and
I wanted to focus on work.

975
00:53:17,510 --> 00:53:18,930
Of course you did!

976
00:53:19,020 --> 00:53:22,350
Because working is awesome
and being married sucks!

977
00:53:22,440 --> 00:53:24,060
That's his car.

978
00:53:24,150 --> 00:53:25,650
What, this right here?
Yes.

979
00:53:25,730 --> 00:53:28,190
Silver lnfiniti,
Penn State sticker,

980
00:53:28,280 --> 00:53:29,900
baseball mitt
in the backseat...

981
00:53:29,990 --> 00:53:33,650
This is Scott. You know
what we should do?

982
00:53:34,660 --> 00:53:36,200
(CAR ALARM BLARING)

983
00:53:36,280 --> 00:53:37,490
Yeah!

984
00:53:38,490 --> 00:53:41,250
I was gonna say
leave a funny note!

985
00:53:43,710 --> 00:53:45,630
(SOUL MUSIC PLAYING)

986
00:53:47,250 --> 00:53:48,710
Where are we?

987
00:53:48,800 --> 00:53:49,840
WeBeSoCa.

988
00:53:49,920 --> 00:53:52,420
What? You're so wasted.

989
00:53:55,680 --> 00:53:59,430
Stop right here! This is good.
Pull over right here.

990
00:53:59,520 --> 00:54:02,560
Angie, I'm gonna go
get a ginger carrot juice,

991
00:54:02,640 --> 00:54:04,230
and you should go home
and get some rest,

992
00:54:04,310 --> 00:54:07,610
because you look
very sleepy and tired.

993
00:54:11,650 --> 00:54:13,610
Where are you going?

994
00:54:15,360 --> 00:54:17,030
ROB: We're closed!

995
00:54:17,120 --> 00:54:20,740
Yeah, well, it looks about the
same as when you're open.

996
00:54:23,870 --> 00:54:27,580
Don't tell me, your people are gonna start
bulldozing the neighborhood tonight.

997
00:54:27,670 --> 00:54:30,920
Yeah, I'm...
l'm really, really sorry

998
00:54:31,000 --> 00:54:33,920
that I'm so good at my job.

999
00:54:34,010 --> 00:54:35,840
What is this,
a taste test?

1000
00:54:35,930 --> 00:54:38,850
No, actually, I wouldn't
do that if I were you.

1001
00:54:38,930 --> 00:54:41,600
No, that...
That's not...

1002
00:54:41,680 --> 00:54:43,350
lt's horrible.
Not very good.

1003
00:54:43,430 --> 00:54:47,020
It's a combination
of papaya juice and coffee.

1004
00:54:47,100 --> 00:54:49,400
I keep this notepad by my bed
in the middle of the night,

1005
00:54:49,480 --> 00:54:51,440
and I write down these ideas
when I'm half asleep,

1006
00:54:51,530 --> 00:54:52,980
and they never
make any sense.

1007
00:54:53,070 --> 00:54:54,440
I do that, too.

1008
00:54:54,530 --> 00:54:58,030
And then I wake up, and I have these
little notes that say things like,

1009
00:54:58,120 --> 00:55:02,490
"make everybody be twins"
and "electric toilet."

1010
00:55:02,580 --> 00:55:04,620
Those are not
good ideas.

1011
00:55:04,710 --> 00:55:05,870
They're really not.

1012
00:55:07,170 --> 00:55:12,340
So why are you out so late? Are
you a prostitute at night, or...

1013
00:55:12,420 --> 00:55:14,090
No.

1014
00:55:14,170 --> 00:55:17,930
I went out tonight for the
first time in a long time,

1015
00:55:18,010 --> 00:55:20,760
and I let a friend
of mine dress me.

1016
00:55:22,560 --> 00:55:24,140
Well, your friend is
a great American.

1017
00:55:24,270 --> 00:55:25,810
(LIQUID SPILLING)
Sorry.

1018
00:55:43,330 --> 00:55:45,240
You know,
I really like your logo.

1019
00:55:45,330 --> 00:55:46,540
Yeah?

1020
00:55:46,620 --> 00:55:48,920
Yeah, I did it myself.

1021
00:55:49,000 --> 00:55:50,630
I really like it.

1022
00:55:50,710 --> 00:55:55,630
You don't think
it looks like a penis?

1023
00:55:57,010 --> 00:55:58,840
No, I don't see that.
No?

1024
00:55:58,930 --> 00:55:59,930
No, I don't see that.

1025
00:56:00,010 --> 00:56:03,550
Over here
you got two obvious...

1026
00:56:03,680 --> 00:56:05,560
I don't know what you're talking about.
...stiff ones... No?

1027
00:56:05,640 --> 00:56:07,850
No, I don't know
what you're talking about.

1028
00:56:09,600 --> 00:56:13,440
You're being nice.
Thank you.

1029
00:56:13,520 --> 00:56:16,230
Also, I don't think you wanna
pick a fight with Jamba Juice.

1030
00:56:16,320 --> 00:56:17,740
I mean, they're not
exactly Wal-Mart.

1031
00:56:17,820 --> 00:56:21,450
Well, they are. They're the Exxon
of frozen juice companies.

1032
00:56:21,530 --> 00:56:25,200
Yes, I think I saw a Michael
Moore documentary about that.

1033
00:56:25,870 --> 00:56:28,370
That's embarrassing.

1034
00:56:28,460 --> 00:56:32,460
So is that offer to get together
some time still on the table?

1035
00:56:32,540 --> 00:56:35,170
Are you asking me out?

1036
00:56:35,250 --> 00:56:37,420
Yes, I think I am.

1037
00:56:37,510 --> 00:56:39,840
Okay, yes,
then, yes. Yeah.

1038
00:56:39,930 --> 00:56:41,010
Great.

1039
00:56:41,680 --> 00:56:42,970
This came off my head.

1040
00:56:43,050 --> 00:56:44,260
Some of that
hair's real, right?

1041
00:56:44,350 --> 00:56:46,760
No. I'm bald. I'm...

1042
00:56:46,850 --> 00:56:49,680
These are real. So we
got that going for us.

1043
00:56:54,360 --> 00:56:55,940
Hi, Carl.

1044
00:56:56,020 --> 00:56:57,280
What's up,
hot stuff?

1045
00:56:57,360 --> 00:56:59,690
What are you doing here? I
told you to stay away from me.

1046
00:56:59,780 --> 00:57:01,700
You think you're getting
this payday without me?

1047
00:57:01,780 --> 00:57:04,240
No way.
I want my half, okay?

1048
00:57:04,320 --> 00:57:06,950
And I've got insurance,
the actual pee-stick.

1049
00:57:07,040 --> 00:57:09,120
I don't even know if that's real.
You probably peed on it.

1050
00:57:09,200 --> 00:57:11,410
Maybe I did, maybe I didn't.
But I'll tell you this.

1051
00:57:11,500 --> 00:57:12,500
It's gonna raise
a lot of questions

1052
00:57:12,580 --> 00:57:13,670
when Kate takes
this down to the lab,

1053
00:57:13,750 --> 00:57:15,670
and they start doing
DNA tests with CSl stuff,

1054
00:57:15,750 --> 00:57:17,590
and molecules and proteins
and the hair follicles,

1055
00:57:17,670 --> 00:57:18,960
and they're gonna
connect the dots.

1056
00:57:19,050 --> 00:57:20,420
And then you're
gonna be busted.

1057
00:57:20,510 --> 00:57:23,470
Carl, I don't wanna do
any of this anymore.

1058
00:57:24,430 --> 00:57:26,930
I want a common-law divorce.

1059
00:57:27,010 --> 00:57:30,310
You wanna give me back the ring
that I made for you in metal shop?

1060
00:57:30,390 --> 00:57:32,020
Yeah, I do.

1061
00:57:32,100 --> 00:57:34,310
Okay, you know what? I'll tell you
when this relationship's over,

1062
00:57:34,400 --> 00:57:36,060
because there's a lot of girls
there sitting on the bench

1063
00:57:36,150 --> 00:57:38,320
that wanna come
into this game, all right?

1064
00:57:38,400 --> 00:57:42,110
So I am canceling
this relationship, okay?

1065
00:57:43,820 --> 00:57:45,160
Please come back to me, Angie.
Oh, my God!

1066
00:57:45,240 --> 00:57:47,700
Wait, wait! Hold on,
hold on, please!

1067
00:57:47,780 --> 00:57:51,790
I wanna say goodbye to you proper, okay?
We owe that to one another.

1068
00:57:51,870 --> 00:57:53,790
Can we please have a
quickie in the car?

1069
00:57:53,870 --> 00:57:55,210
What?
What's wrong with you?

1070
00:57:55,290 --> 00:57:59,420
You know what? I'm not gonna be here
for you when Kate kicks you out.

1071
00:57:59,500 --> 00:58:01,340
So deal with that.

1072
00:58:02,590 --> 00:58:05,180
My girl rocks?
My girl does not rock, okay?

1073
00:58:05,260 --> 00:58:06,840
My girl is a divorcée.

1074
00:58:06,930 --> 00:58:08,470
So I hope
you got Kleenex,

1075
00:58:08,560 --> 00:58:12,640
'cause you just said goodbye to the
coolest thing that ever happened to you.

1076
00:58:16,100 --> 00:58:19,770
I'm gonna bang your friends.
Consider them all banged.

1077
00:58:58,110 --> 00:59:01,070
The reason I called you collect is 'cause
it's gonna take more than a few quarters

1078
00:59:01,150 --> 00:59:03,900
to express how I feel
about you, baby.

1079
00:59:03,990 --> 00:59:06,030
Hey, where you going?

1080
00:59:09,320 --> 00:59:13,700
I knew something was up when I saw you
beating your baby bump like that.

1081
00:59:14,790 --> 00:59:17,500
It wasn't supposed
to happen like this.

1082
00:59:17,580 --> 00:59:20,330
Everything just
got way out of hand.

1083
00:59:25,300 --> 00:59:28,090
I think
I'm just gonna split.

1084
00:59:28,180 --> 00:59:29,590
That's a good idea.

1085
00:59:29,680 --> 00:59:30,970
Just slip away
in the dead of night

1086
00:59:31,050 --> 00:59:32,600
and leave Kate thinking
you stole the baby.

1087
00:59:32,680 --> 00:59:34,140
That would destroy her.

1088
00:59:34,220 --> 00:59:36,810
This ain't some little scam where you
just call up Domino's and be like,

1089
00:59:36,890 --> 00:59:40,900
"Yo. You know, I'm doing some church
youth event. I need 10 free pizzas."

1090
00:59:40,980 --> 00:59:42,310
Why, does that work?

1091
00:59:42,400 --> 00:59:45,860
You're lying about the
existence of a human being.

1092
00:59:45,940 --> 00:59:49,910
If you don't tell her, you'll never
be able to live with yourself.

1093
00:59:49,990 --> 00:59:51,990
Maybe you can tell her
after I'm gone.

1094
00:59:52,080 --> 00:59:53,780
I'll tell you
what I'm gonna do.

1095
00:59:53,870 --> 00:59:56,200
Not a damn thing, 'cause you're
gonna tell her yourself.

1096
01:00:00,580 --> 01:00:02,920
I've got
a surprise for you.

1097
01:00:03,000 --> 01:00:04,550
I got a surprise
for you, too.

1098
01:00:04,630 --> 01:00:08,630
It is a brochure for the
Philadelphia School of Textiles.

1099
01:00:08,720 --> 01:00:10,430
They've got
a great fashion program.

1100
01:00:10,510 --> 01:00:11,590
Thanks.

1101
01:00:11,680 --> 01:00:14,720
But that's not the whole surprise.
Open it.

1102
01:00:15,350 --> 01:00:16,930
I'm giving you
your check early.

1103
01:00:17,020 --> 01:00:21,400
No, Kate. I can't take that. You
gotta put that through the agency.

1104
01:00:21,480 --> 01:00:24,570
No, it's not gonna bounce.
Don't you trust me?

1105
01:00:30,570 --> 01:00:31,820
Where are we going?

1106
01:00:31,910 --> 01:00:33,240
You have
an ultrasound appointment.

1107
01:00:33,330 --> 01:00:36,330
What? No.
Today's Thursday.

1108
01:00:36,410 --> 01:00:38,660
Ultrasound isn't Thursday.
Birthing class is Thursday.

1109
01:00:38,750 --> 01:00:42,040
Usually, but you're 18 weeks, and
so you have another ultrasound.

1110
01:00:42,130 --> 01:00:43,960
I can't wait.

1111
01:00:44,040 --> 01:00:46,920
I hope the baby's in a good position,
so we can see its little profile,

1112
01:00:47,010 --> 01:00:50,420
because I'd really like to get one of
those printouts to hang over my desk.

1113
01:00:50,510 --> 01:00:51,550
Do you think it could
look like me yet?

1114
01:00:51,640 --> 01:00:53,930
Could the baby look
like you at 18 weeks?

1115
01:00:54,010 --> 01:00:56,760
What if it has
little tiny glasses?

1116
01:00:57,770 --> 01:01:01,600
I'm joking. That's me
trying to make a joke.

1117
01:01:02,350 --> 01:01:04,020
That's cold.
Sorry about that.

1118
01:01:04,110 --> 01:01:05,440
Just...

1119
01:01:06,150 --> 01:01:07,650
(HUMMING)

1120
01:01:13,320 --> 01:01:16,330
lf... When you get mad, do you
stay mad for a long time?

1121
01:01:16,410 --> 01:01:20,250
Yes, yes. I'm a big
grudge-holder, actually.

1122
01:01:20,330 --> 01:01:22,250
Hear that?
What?

1123
01:01:22,330 --> 01:01:25,040
That's your heartbeat.
You nervous?

1124
01:01:25,130 --> 01:01:26,590
Yeah, a little.

1125
01:01:26,670 --> 01:01:30,920
Okay, I'm just... Just having
a little trouble finding...

1126
01:01:31,010 --> 01:01:32,760
You're gonna have
a lot of trouble.

1127
01:01:32,840 --> 01:01:35,720
Kate, I gotta tell you something.
I'm not really...

1128
01:01:35,800 --> 01:01:37,560
There's the baby's heartbeat.

1129
01:01:37,640 --> 01:01:38,680
(SCOFFING)

1130
01:01:38,770 --> 01:01:40,680
I'm not really... What?
Isn't it wonderful?

1131
01:01:40,770 --> 01:01:41,730
Holy shit!

1132
01:01:41,810 --> 01:01:43,600
There's a baby in there?
Yep!

1133
01:01:43,690 --> 01:01:45,770
How did it get in there?
It's a miracle.

1134
01:01:45,860 --> 01:01:48,110
What did you
wanna tell me?

1135
01:01:49,190 --> 01:01:51,490
I'm so excited.

1136
01:01:52,490 --> 01:01:53,570
Yay!

1137
01:01:56,450 --> 01:01:59,700
What do you mean, pregnant? I
thought you was lying to Kate.

1138
01:01:59,790 --> 01:02:04,830
I was. I am. lt's not Kate's baby.
It's Carl's.

1139
01:02:04,920 --> 01:02:05,920
So the procedure thing...

1140
01:02:06,000 --> 01:02:07,750
Didn't take.

1141
01:02:07,840 --> 01:02:09,920
And then I was crying,
so Carl and I did it.

1142
01:02:10,010 --> 01:02:11,420
And it's just country.

1143
01:02:11,510 --> 01:02:12,760
I missed a couple periods,

1144
01:02:12,840 --> 01:02:15,300
and I thought maybe it was my hormones,
you know what I'm talking about?

1145
01:02:15,390 --> 01:02:16,510
No, I don't know
nothing about that.

1146
01:02:16,600 --> 01:02:18,720
But then I started spotting, and
I thought that was my period,

1147
01:02:18,810 --> 01:02:20,100
but usually I don't
have a heavy flow.

1148
01:02:20,180 --> 01:02:21,930
(SHUSHING) Stop it.

1149
01:02:22,020 --> 01:02:25,440
My boobs didn't hurt, so I was
like, "lt's not my period..."

1150
01:02:25,520 --> 01:02:27,860
You know what? Look, I'm just
gonna lay it out, all right?

1151
01:02:27,940 --> 01:02:29,400
I'm not discussing
the lady business with you.

1152
01:02:29,480 --> 01:02:31,110
I mean, I think it's a
beautiful thing and all that,

1153
01:02:31,190 --> 01:02:32,900
but it's disgusting, okay?

1154
01:02:32,990 --> 01:02:34,570
And I'm afraid if we
keep talking about it,

1155
01:02:34,650 --> 01:02:37,620
that our cycles
might synchronize...

1156
01:02:37,700 --> 01:02:40,530
What am I
supposed to do, Oscar?

1157
01:02:40,620 --> 01:02:44,370
I can't cash that check. I can't
take any of Kate's money.

1158
01:02:44,460 --> 01:02:47,880
But I am gonna stay here
until I figure out what to do.

1159
01:02:47,960 --> 01:02:50,170
I don't know anything
about being a mother.

1160
01:02:50,250 --> 01:02:51,960
You better start learning.

1161
01:02:52,050 --> 01:02:54,170
It's good if the kid's raised
here, though, you know?

1162
01:02:54,260 --> 01:02:58,220
Better school, better
apartment, better situation.

1163
01:03:00,560 --> 01:03:02,640
Is that what you want?

1164
01:03:03,930 --> 01:03:05,890
No, I wanna keep it.

1165
01:03:10,230 --> 01:03:11,730
Have you read this?

1166
01:03:11,820 --> 01:03:16,650
"One in four million babies are
born with a full set of teeth."

1167
01:03:16,740 --> 01:03:19,030
Angie, it's gonna be fine.

1168
01:03:19,120 --> 01:03:20,120
Where you going?

1169
01:03:20,200 --> 01:03:21,910
I have a date
with that guy, Rob.

1170
01:03:21,990 --> 01:03:23,080
Are you gonna
tell him about me?

1171
01:03:23,160 --> 01:03:25,290
No. I've made
that mistake before.

1172
01:03:25,370 --> 01:03:26,830
It turns out
they don't like it

1173
01:03:26,920 --> 01:03:31,090
when you talk about the successful
transfer of embryos on the first date.

1174
01:03:31,170 --> 01:03:35,340
Read the chapter about hermaphrodites.
You won't sleep for a week.

1175
01:03:36,680 --> 01:03:39,340
Hello, folks, my name is Chet.
I'm your waiter.

1176
01:03:39,430 --> 01:03:42,810
Are you folks familiar with
the raw food vegan movement?

1177
01:03:42,930 --> 01:03:44,390
Yeah. I think he is,
more than I am.

1178
01:03:44,470 --> 01:03:45,930
Yeah, yeah.

1179
01:03:46,020 --> 01:03:48,140
Okay, should we start
with some appetizers?

1180
01:03:48,230 --> 01:03:51,730
Yeah. How's the
sea kelp pizza?

1181
01:03:51,820 --> 01:03:54,270
That's got a nice earthy taste,
little bit of a dirt taste.

1182
01:03:54,360 --> 01:03:56,110
It's very nice.

1183
01:03:56,190 --> 01:03:58,780
Salty. We'll stay
away from that.

1184
01:03:58,860 --> 01:04:00,280
You know what looks good
is the blue algae?

1185
01:04:00,410 --> 01:04:02,200
You wanna just...
Yes, yes.

1186
01:04:02,280 --> 01:04:03,280
Excellent.
Be right back.

1187
01:04:06,830 --> 01:04:08,660
So what kind of law
did you practice?

1188
01:04:08,750 --> 01:04:11,830
Corporate. You know
when you're watching the news,

1189
01:04:11,920 --> 01:04:14,500
and you see some bloated
CEO involved in a scandal,

1190
01:04:14,590 --> 01:04:15,630
and you kind of
wonder to yourself,

1191
01:04:15,710 --> 01:04:18,510
"How is this prick
not going straight to jail?"

1192
01:04:18,590 --> 01:04:20,880
Sometimes it was
because of me.

1193
01:04:20,970 --> 01:04:22,890
You must be very proud.

1194
01:04:22,970 --> 01:04:24,720
All right, here's
your blue-green algae

1195
01:04:24,810 --> 01:04:26,850
and a yeast bowl
for the table.

1196
01:04:26,930 --> 01:04:27,930
Thank you.
Thanks.

1197
01:04:28,020 --> 01:04:29,770
This looks good.

1198
01:04:29,850 --> 01:04:31,650
Oh, it's warm.
Yeah.

1199
01:04:33,520 --> 01:04:36,440
What about you?
You like your work?

1200
01:04:36,530 --> 01:04:38,440
I do, but I mean,

1201
01:04:38,530 --> 01:04:40,990
I have other things
in my life besides my job.

1202
01:04:41,070 --> 01:04:43,620
I like to travel for work.

1203
01:04:44,830 --> 01:04:46,290
Oh, that's a...

1204
01:04:47,410 --> 01:04:49,250
That's a good yeast.

1205
01:04:49,660 --> 01:04:51,670
Very yeasty.

1206
01:04:52,170 --> 01:04:54,170
How long have
you been vegan?

1207
01:04:54,670 --> 01:04:56,500
I'm not.

1208
01:04:56,590 --> 01:04:59,720
I'm sorry. I'm not,
I thought that you were,

1209
01:04:59,800 --> 01:05:01,050
and that's why
I took you here.

1210
01:05:01,130 --> 01:05:04,260
Because of where you work, I
never would have... Oh, God.

1211
01:05:04,390 --> 01:05:06,350
Can we... Yeah, you want to...
l eat meat.

1212
01:05:06,430 --> 01:05:08,020
Yeah, I eat meat
like nobody's business.

1213
01:05:10,350 --> 01:05:13,440
I'll have a large steak with
provolone, no Cheez Whiz, no onions,

1214
01:05:13,520 --> 01:05:15,520
peppers on the side,
don't overcook the meat.

1215
01:05:15,610 --> 01:05:18,110
Also, I'd like you
to slice me a new fresh roll,

1216
01:05:18,190 --> 01:05:19,940
because those ones have been
sitting out for a long time.

1217
01:05:20,030 --> 01:05:22,280
I want a Birch Beer,
cold, no cup.

1218
01:05:22,360 --> 01:05:25,160
You really should consider changing
those Styrofoam cups to paper ones,

1219
01:05:25,240 --> 01:05:27,530
because they're very bad
for the environment.

1220
01:05:27,620 --> 01:05:29,660
Yeah, I'll have the same.

1221
01:05:30,080 --> 01:05:31,910
I'm sorry. I'm a little
overly thorough.

1222
01:05:32,000 --> 01:05:34,880
Some people would say that I
am bossy and controlling.

1223
01:05:34,960 --> 01:05:36,840
No, that's just prejudice.

1224
01:05:36,920 --> 01:05:38,710
They call you bossy and controlling
'cause you're a woman.

1225
01:05:38,800 --> 01:05:43,470
But if you were a man doing the
same stuff, you'd just be a dick.

1226
01:05:44,050 --> 01:05:45,640
What?

1227
01:05:45,720 --> 01:05:46,720
Nothing.

1228
01:05:47,470 --> 01:05:50,140
No one's ever called me a
dick before on a date.

1229
01:05:50,230 --> 01:05:52,180
Term of endearment.

1230
01:05:52,270 --> 01:05:56,520
So listen, there's something
that I haven't told you.

1231
01:05:56,610 --> 01:06:01,110
And it may be
a deal-breaker.

1232
01:06:01,570 --> 01:06:03,570
Oh, boy, you are super
fruity, aren't you?

1233
01:06:03,660 --> 01:06:04,740
No.

1234
01:06:04,820 --> 01:06:07,870
But I do
have a daughter.

1235
01:06:08,540 --> 01:06:12,580
She's 12 years old and she lives
with me every other weekend.

1236
01:06:13,500 --> 01:06:15,330
I think that's great.

1237
01:06:15,420 --> 01:06:16,500
Yeah?

1238
01:06:17,670 --> 01:06:20,500
Okay.
You have any kids?

1239
01:06:20,630 --> 01:06:22,760
I've never
been married.

1240
01:06:23,590 --> 01:06:25,680
Well, Kate,

1241
01:06:26,760 --> 01:06:29,760
you don't have to
be married to have a kid.

1242
01:06:44,320 --> 01:06:45,320
Do you want to
go back to my...

1243
01:06:45,410 --> 01:06:47,160
Yes.

1244
01:06:47,240 --> 01:06:48,450
I was going to say
apartment, just to be clear.

1245
01:06:48,530 --> 01:06:50,370
Yeah. I'm 37.
I know how this works.

1246
01:06:50,450 --> 01:06:51,450
Okay.
Let's go.

1247
01:06:51,540 --> 01:06:53,620
It's actually
this way.

1248
01:06:53,710 --> 01:06:54,960
Okay.

1249
01:06:59,420 --> 01:07:01,250
1406.
Yeah.

1250
01:07:01,340 --> 01:07:02,880
Oh, no. No, no, no.

1251
01:07:02,960 --> 01:07:06,760
Look who just got inducted
into the walk of shame.

1252
01:07:06,840 --> 01:07:09,890
Why are you all shiny
like a soul food cook?

1253
01:07:10,600 --> 01:07:11,760
I want you, now,

1254
01:07:11,850 --> 01:07:14,350
to look your partner in the
eye, and I want you to tell her

1255
01:07:14,480 --> 01:07:17,140
she is beautiful.

1256
01:07:18,860 --> 01:07:20,230
You are beautiful.

1257
01:07:20,320 --> 01:07:22,980
Tell her,
"You are strong."

1258
01:07:23,150 --> 01:07:24,360
You are strong.

1259
01:07:24,440 --> 01:07:29,450
Tell her, "Thank you
for giving me this baby."

1260
01:07:29,530 --> 01:07:32,030
Thank you for giving
me this baby.

1261
01:07:34,290 --> 01:07:36,330
Are you crying?
No.

1262
01:07:37,040 --> 01:07:40,790
I am. I'm crying a little bit.

1263
01:07:42,340 --> 01:07:43,920
All right.

1264
01:07:46,380 --> 01:07:48,470
Romaine, Cheyenne,
time to go.

1265
01:07:48,550 --> 01:07:51,600
We have a playdate
with Wingspan and Banjo.

1266
01:07:52,100 --> 01:07:55,770
Those kids would have got their asses
handed to them in my neighborhood.

1267
01:07:55,850 --> 01:07:58,980
My sister wants to know what kind
of cake you want for the shower.

1268
01:07:59,060 --> 01:08:00,850
Kate, I don't think I should
go to that, you know?

1269
01:08:00,940 --> 01:08:02,860
I mean, that's just
kind of for you.

1270
01:08:02,940 --> 01:08:04,270
No, it's for both of us.

1271
01:08:04,360 --> 01:08:07,610
My mother wants to meet you
and make you feel weird.

1272
01:08:07,700 --> 01:08:08,950
(CELL PHONE RINGING)

1273
01:08:09,030 --> 01:08:10,530
Excuse me.

1274
01:08:12,370 --> 01:08:13,450
Yes. Barry, hi.

1275
01:08:13,530 --> 01:08:16,040
No, I'm pulling into the
construction site right now.

1276
01:08:16,620 --> 01:08:17,830
Think I went to
a rave here once.

1277
01:08:17,910 --> 01:08:19,250
Please, I asked you
to wait in the car.

1278
01:08:19,330 --> 01:08:20,290
It's too hot in there,

1279
01:08:20,380 --> 01:08:22,460
and your weirdo air conditioning,
I don't know how to work it.

1280
01:08:22,540 --> 01:08:24,130
Barry, I'm sorry.
Kate, where you been?

1281
01:08:24,210 --> 01:08:26,210
I'm having second thoughts
about this location.

1282
01:08:26,300 --> 01:08:27,300
Is it the taxes?

1283
01:08:27,380 --> 01:08:29,930
It's probably because this place
gives you a weird vibe, right?

1284
01:08:30,010 --> 01:08:32,220
Yes. That one.

1285
01:08:33,350 --> 01:08:35,640
I'm not getting
good vibes here.

1286
01:08:35,720 --> 01:08:37,640
And if there's one thing
Oprah taught me,

1287
01:08:37,730 --> 01:08:40,020
it's to trust my instincts
and follow my fear.

1288
01:08:40,100 --> 01:08:42,150
Is that the episode where
she got her ears pierced?

1289
01:08:42,230 --> 01:08:45,770
No, this was at her home in Maui.
Who are you?

1290
01:08:45,860 --> 01:08:46,820
I'm Angie.

1291
01:08:46,900 --> 01:08:48,030
She works for me.

1292
01:08:48,110 --> 01:08:50,150
She's very intuitive.

1293
01:08:50,240 --> 01:08:51,530
I read people's energies.

1294
01:08:51,610 --> 01:08:53,490
You read energies?
Yeah.

1295
01:08:57,540 --> 01:08:59,410
Good. Very good.

1296
01:09:01,750 --> 01:09:03,920
How's the energy
in this site?

1297
01:09:06,630 --> 01:09:08,880
Green, mostly.

1298
01:09:09,340 --> 01:09:12,180
Like healthy leaves.

1299
01:09:14,390 --> 01:09:15,680
Money?

1300
01:09:17,100 --> 01:09:18,430
Exactly.

1301
01:09:18,520 --> 01:09:19,810
I like your maid.

1302
01:09:19,890 --> 01:09:20,890
So do l.

1303
01:09:20,980 --> 01:09:22,600
Let me put my hands
into your hands,

1304
01:09:22,690 --> 01:09:24,810
and I'll whisper to you
the secret of success.

1305
01:09:33,950 --> 01:09:35,870
So, are we back on?

1306
01:09:35,950 --> 01:09:37,620
We were never off.

1307
01:09:38,080 --> 01:09:39,040
KATE: What did he say?

1308
01:09:39,120 --> 01:09:40,250
ANGIE: The secret of success.

1309
01:09:40,330 --> 01:09:41,330
And?

1310
01:09:41,410 --> 01:09:42,540
He said
"Have a big penis."

1311
01:09:42,620 --> 01:09:44,330
No, he didn't.
Yeah, he did.

1312
01:09:46,130 --> 01:09:47,130
(POP MUSIC PLAYING)

1313
01:10:00,310 --> 01:10:01,310
(GROANS)

1314
01:10:44,890 --> 01:10:47,770
Oh, my God!

1315
01:10:47,860 --> 01:10:50,020
Oh, my God.
Look! Wait.

1316
01:10:50,110 --> 01:10:51,900
Is that the face?
I think.

1317
01:10:51,980 --> 01:10:54,360
That was a big one!

1318
01:10:54,700 --> 01:10:57,160
Oh, my God.
What does it feel like?

1319
01:10:58,370 --> 01:10:59,910
Like if you ate
a meatball sandwich,

1320
01:10:59,990 --> 01:11:02,370
then that meatball
sandwich was kicking you.

1321
01:11:04,210 --> 01:11:06,000
I think I gotta tell Rob
about you and the baby.

1322
01:11:06,080 --> 01:11:07,120
What? Why?

1323
01:11:07,210 --> 01:11:08,290
Well, we've been
going out for a month,

1324
01:11:08,380 --> 01:11:10,460
and I didn't think
it would turn into anything,

1325
01:11:10,550 --> 01:11:11,550
but it sort of is.

1326
01:11:11,630 --> 01:11:13,130
I don't think
that's a good idea.

1327
01:11:13,210 --> 01:11:15,090
You know, he may
break up with you.

1328
01:11:15,220 --> 01:11:18,300
Yeah, but the longer I wait,
the weirder it's gonna be.

1329
01:11:18,390 --> 01:11:20,050
It's gonna be weird
no matter what.

1330
01:11:20,140 --> 01:11:23,270
He'll know I'm hiding something.
I'm the worst liar.

1331
01:11:23,350 --> 01:11:26,480
Okay, tell me three things about
yourself and make one of them a lie.

1332
01:11:26,560 --> 01:11:27,850
Okay.

1333
01:11:27,940 --> 01:11:30,230
I'm from Pennsylvania,

1334
01:11:30,310 --> 01:11:33,730
I am a Leo,
and I am 5'9".

1335
01:11:36,240 --> 01:11:38,320
I don't want to... This is
why I can't lie to him.

1336
01:11:38,410 --> 01:11:39,950
You're not lying to him,

1337
01:11:40,030 --> 01:11:42,490
you're just not telling him the
truth, there's a big difference.

1338
01:11:42,660 --> 01:11:44,040
Is there?

1339
01:11:44,580 --> 01:11:46,790
I don't know.
Don't ask me.

1340
01:11:54,630 --> 01:11:58,050
ANGIE: (SINGING) Don't speak
I can't even take it

1341
01:11:58,130 --> 01:12:01,220
And I don't
need no reason

1342
01:12:01,930 --> 01:12:03,220
Hi.

1343
01:12:03,310 --> 01:12:06,140
I'm Rob. I'm here
to pick up Kate.

1344
01:12:06,230 --> 01:12:07,230
Oh!

1345
01:12:08,060 --> 01:12:09,060
(MUMBLING)

1346
01:12:09,190 --> 01:12:13,110
Sorry, I'm a little early. I was
just in the neighborhood, so...

1347
01:12:13,320 --> 01:12:14,900
Do come in.

1348
01:12:18,280 --> 01:12:19,740
Hello, I'm Angela.

1349
01:12:19,820 --> 01:12:20,860
Okay.

1350
01:12:20,950 --> 01:12:24,280
I'm Kate's sister, so...

1351
01:12:25,080 --> 01:12:27,620
We are in the same family.

1352
01:12:28,210 --> 01:12:33,670
And I was just practicing the
ancient Japanese art of karaoke.

1353
01:12:34,550 --> 01:12:36,050
Karaoke?
Yes.

1354
01:12:36,130 --> 01:12:39,880
You delightful...
Hello. Oh, well.

1355
01:12:40,930 --> 01:12:43,220
I can see how she likes you so much.
Kate?

1356
01:12:43,300 --> 01:12:44,640
You live here?
No,

1357
01:12:44,720 --> 01:12:46,060
no.

1358
01:12:46,140 --> 01:12:50,350
I live in New York City
in a pied-à-terre apartment

1359
01:12:50,440 --> 01:12:52,520
with a husband
that I have.

1360
01:12:54,110 --> 01:12:57,820
Wow, so you're just
kind of visiting here, or...

1361
01:12:57,900 --> 01:12:59,570
He's in the stock market.

1362
01:12:59,650 --> 01:13:04,870
So we go from city to city,
visiting other stock markets.

1363
01:13:05,660 --> 01:13:07,080
And that's how we roll.

1364
01:13:07,160 --> 01:13:08,830
It's funny, 'cause you guys
don't look alike at all.

1365
01:13:08,910 --> 01:13:10,290
Oh, well.

1366
01:13:10,370 --> 01:13:12,000
Different dads?
Yes.

1367
01:13:12,080 --> 01:13:13,830
We have different dads.
That's what we have.

1368
01:13:13,920 --> 01:13:16,540
We have different dads.
Thank you for that.

1369
01:13:16,630 --> 01:13:18,590
Is that my phone?

1370
01:13:18,670 --> 01:13:19,970
I didn't actually hear...

1371
01:13:20,050 --> 01:13:23,510
lt was. Hold on, it's from Europe.
Hello?

1372
01:13:25,050 --> 01:13:26,970
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)

1373
01:13:28,520 --> 01:13:34,060
Yes, interesting. lt's a business call.
So nice to meet you.

1374
01:13:35,110 --> 01:13:36,110
KATE: What?
ANGIE: Yes.

1375
01:13:36,610 --> 01:13:39,280
What? How long
did he talk to you?

1376
01:13:39,360 --> 01:13:42,900
Hi. Look at you, early bird.

1377
01:13:42,990 --> 01:13:44,950
Okay, it's nice to see you.

1378
01:13:45,030 --> 01:13:46,240
Oh, my gosh,
well, let's go.

1379
01:13:46,330 --> 01:13:47,330
Yeah.

1380
01:13:47,410 --> 01:13:48,950
Does your sister
want to come with us?

1381
01:13:49,040 --> 01:13:51,160
No, she's not well.

1382
01:13:51,500 --> 01:13:53,540
Bye, Angela.
Adios.

1383
01:13:54,500 --> 01:13:56,250
OSCAR: Push, woman.

1384
01:13:56,920 --> 01:14:00,670
Yeah, good. Push, and boom!
Congratulations. Look.

1385
01:14:00,760 --> 01:14:02,880
Popcorn.

1386
01:14:02,970 --> 01:14:04,010
See?

1387
01:14:04,090 --> 01:14:07,390
It's that easy.
What movie we watching?

1388
01:14:08,560 --> 01:14:10,520
Extreme Vaginal Delivery.

1389
01:14:10,810 --> 01:14:13,480
The miracle of
really big childbirth.

1390
01:14:15,600 --> 01:14:17,190
Oh, damn!

1391
01:14:17,690 --> 01:14:19,230
You can't come
back from that.

1392
01:14:20,860 --> 01:14:23,150
That's why you always
want to stay over here, huh?

1393
01:14:23,240 --> 01:14:25,160
It's one of the reasons.
Well,

1394
01:14:25,240 --> 01:14:27,370
how long is your sister in town?

1395
01:14:27,450 --> 01:14:29,080
Angie's not
really my sister.

1396
01:14:29,160 --> 01:14:32,580
I know. She's your half-sister.
She told me.

1397
01:14:33,750 --> 01:14:36,500
What else did
Angela tell you?

1398
01:14:36,790 --> 01:14:38,250
Well,

1399
01:14:39,420 --> 01:14:41,550
she told me
that you like me a lot.

1400
01:14:41,630 --> 01:14:44,380
Well, she's a liar.
She's a known liar.

1401
01:14:44,470 --> 01:14:45,470
What is this?

1402
01:14:45,550 --> 01:14:50,970
Jillian wants me to take her to an exhibit
of abnormal skulls at the Mütter Museum.

1403
01:14:52,020 --> 01:14:53,480
Do you need me
to get out of here?

1404
01:14:53,560 --> 01:14:55,520
No, no. No, I was gonna see
if you wanted to come.

1405
01:14:55,600 --> 01:14:56,850
You want me
to meet your daughter?

1406
01:14:56,940 --> 01:14:59,110
Is that a bad idea?

1407
01:14:59,230 --> 01:15:02,860
No. I really,
really like kids.

1408
01:15:05,490 --> 01:15:06,820
Oh, my God.
I know.

1409
01:15:06,910 --> 01:15:09,030
Have you read
this article?

1410
01:15:09,120 --> 01:15:11,490
This Chaffee Backnell lady.

1411
01:15:11,580 --> 01:15:13,790
Bicknell.
She is a piece of work.

1412
01:15:13,870 --> 01:15:18,500
I mean, her whole surrogacy
process is very science-fictiony.

1413
01:15:18,580 --> 01:15:20,210
There's so many kids
that need to be adopted.

1414
01:15:20,290 --> 01:15:21,590
Well, adoption
can take years.

1415
01:15:21,670 --> 01:15:25,920
And these people would pay, like,
you know, $50,000, in order to...

1416
01:15:26,010 --> 01:15:27,380
lt's $100,000, actually.

1417
01:15:27,470 --> 01:15:31,390
You know, have your baby custom-carried
by a gestation assistant.

1418
01:15:31,470 --> 01:15:32,470
What is that?

1419
01:15:32,560 --> 01:15:35,270
Well, I think it's probably
more complicated than it seems.

1420
01:15:35,350 --> 01:15:37,190
A lot of rich people
getting what they want.

1421
01:15:37,270 --> 01:15:38,900
(SENTIMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING
ON RADIO)

1422
01:15:38,980 --> 01:15:41,560
(EXCLAIMS) I hate that song.

1423
01:15:45,610 --> 01:15:47,650
Here you go. You got it?
Yeah, I'm good.

1424
01:15:47,740 --> 01:15:48,740
OSCAR: So, do you feel
good about yourself?

1425
01:15:48,820 --> 01:15:51,530
You're just going to let Kate go ahead
and have this whole baby shower, right?

1426
01:15:51,620 --> 01:15:53,990
You don't realize
how ruthless that is, right?

1427
01:15:54,080 --> 01:15:56,580
Hey, man, that's a sweet cake.
That's tight. That's tight.

1428
01:15:56,660 --> 01:15:58,160
Service entrance,
straight to the terrace.

1429
01:15:58,250 --> 01:15:59,250
What am I
supposed to do?

1430
01:15:59,330 --> 01:16:01,750
Tell her today, in front of all
of her friends and her family?

1431
01:16:01,840 --> 01:16:03,920
No, no, no. Wait till the child
is, like, nine years old,

1432
01:16:04,000 --> 01:16:05,710
and then tell her,
like my first ex did me.

1433
01:16:05,800 --> 01:16:08,470
Okay, I'm going to
tell her tonight.

1434
01:16:08,930 --> 01:16:10,340
Or Monday.

1435
01:16:10,850 --> 01:16:13,640
But then it'll ruin her week, so
maybe I should wait till Friday.

1436
01:16:13,720 --> 01:16:15,770
Then it would ruin her
weekend, so maybe I should...

1437
01:16:15,850 --> 01:16:17,600
I don't know
when I'm gonna tell her.

1438
01:16:17,770 --> 01:16:19,770
When's the best day to tell
someone horrible news?

1439
01:16:19,850 --> 01:16:20,900
Yesterday.

1440
01:16:23,690 --> 01:16:26,440
I tell you, a pagan birth
is a fascinating thing.

1441
01:16:26,530 --> 01:16:27,940
You know, now that
I've done it myself,

1442
01:16:28,030 --> 01:16:30,450
it seems crazy
not to eat the placenta.

1443
01:16:31,240 --> 01:16:33,240
I'm sorry, did you say
polenta or placenta?

1444
01:16:33,330 --> 01:16:35,490
Placenta,
the afterbirth, yeah.

1445
01:16:35,580 --> 01:16:38,200
Ashley turned us onto it...

1446
01:16:40,620 --> 01:16:42,080
Angie.

1447
01:16:42,330 --> 01:16:43,920
Hi, I'm Caroline,

1448
01:16:44,040 --> 01:16:46,590
Kate's sister. Nice to meet you.
Hi, nice to meet you.

1449
01:16:46,670 --> 01:16:48,800
And this is
our mother, Rose.

1450
01:16:48,880 --> 01:16:49,970
Hi, nice to meet you.

1451
01:16:50,050 --> 01:16:51,130
How do you do?

1452
01:16:51,220 --> 01:16:53,600
So, tell me,
once the baby is born,

1453
01:16:53,680 --> 01:16:57,220
will you just go away, or shall
I expect you at Christmas?

1454
01:16:57,310 --> 01:16:58,310
Mom.

1455
01:16:58,390 --> 01:16:59,430
What?

1456
01:16:59,520 --> 01:17:03,060
This is a reasonable question.
All my friends are asking.

1457
01:17:03,150 --> 01:17:04,810
KATE: Well, we haven't
really talked about it.

1458
01:17:04,900 --> 01:17:06,440
No, there's not a lot of
stuff we've talked about,

1459
01:17:06,530 --> 01:17:08,150
we have a lot of stuff
to talk about.

1460
01:17:08,240 --> 01:17:10,950
I think Angie might want to visit
the baby a few times a year.

1461
01:17:11,030 --> 01:17:13,990
You know, or I might be out of town,
I don't know where I'm going.

1462
01:17:14,070 --> 01:17:16,780
ANGIE: I mean, I think I've got
plans, but I'll definitely call.

1463
01:17:16,870 --> 01:17:19,580
Summer, if we're on vacation, maybe Angie
would want to come with us some time.

1464
01:17:19,660 --> 01:17:20,870
And who knows where we're
going to be in a year?

1465
01:17:20,960 --> 01:17:23,330
I think it's really important that she
remain a part of the baby's life.

1466
01:17:23,420 --> 01:17:26,090
Yeah, you know,
or completely separate.

1467
01:17:26,170 --> 01:17:27,550
We're just going to
play it fast and loose,

1468
01:17:27,630 --> 01:17:31,010
you know, just see how
it all shakes out.

1469
01:17:31,090 --> 01:17:32,300
Always been my motto.

1470
01:17:46,270 --> 01:17:48,480
Rob? Hi.
Hi.

1471
01:17:48,570 --> 01:17:50,900
Hey, I know it's your
sister's baby shower,

1472
01:17:50,990 --> 01:17:53,610
just, you haven't called me in days. I
thought maybe I did something wrong.

1473
01:17:53,700 --> 01:17:55,450
No, you didn't do anything.

1474
01:17:55,530 --> 01:17:57,200
Is it because I wanted to
introduce you to my kid?

1475
01:17:57,280 --> 01:17:58,740
No, Rob, I just...

1476
01:17:58,830 --> 01:18:01,040
I think you and I
view the world differently.

1477
01:18:01,120 --> 01:18:03,580
Bad news people,
party's over.

1478
01:18:04,080 --> 01:18:06,210
Start heading for the door.
Who let him in here?

1479
01:18:06,290 --> 01:18:08,210
Carl, don't say
something stupid.

1480
01:18:08,300 --> 01:18:10,300
She hasn't told you.

1481
01:18:10,630 --> 01:18:12,010
I thought since you
guys were best friends,

1482
01:18:12,090 --> 01:18:13,340
she probably
told you everything.

1483
01:18:13,430 --> 01:18:15,510
Shut your mouth, Carl.
What is going on?

1484
01:18:15,590 --> 01:18:17,800
She's not even pregnant, okay?

1485
01:18:18,100 --> 01:18:19,810
I mean, look.

1486
01:18:20,600 --> 01:18:22,310
Angie what is that?

1487
01:18:23,100 --> 01:18:24,480
Feel it.

1488
01:18:26,060 --> 01:18:28,230
It's moving.
Yeah, it's a baby.

1489
01:18:28,980 --> 01:18:30,690
And it's yours.

1490
01:18:31,030 --> 01:18:32,070
What are you saying?

1491
01:18:32,150 --> 01:18:33,150
Kate,

1492
01:18:33,240 --> 01:18:35,780
I really tried to make
you a baby, I swear.

1493
01:18:35,860 --> 01:18:36,950
What are you saying?

1494
01:18:37,030 --> 01:18:38,160
We took a test

1495
01:18:38,240 --> 01:18:40,830
as soon as we got home,
and the procedure didn't work.

1496
01:18:40,950 --> 01:18:44,370
And I was real, you know, horny,
because of all the hormones.

1497
01:18:44,460 --> 01:18:46,000
So we did it.

1498
01:18:46,330 --> 01:18:47,500
I felt like a failure.

1499
01:18:47,590 --> 01:18:49,290
And Carl told me you were
going to get somebody else.

1500
01:18:49,380 --> 01:18:52,090
Those hormones can also
give you a false negative.

1501
01:18:52,170 --> 01:18:55,380
That's why they want you to wait
two weeks before you take a test.

1502
01:18:55,470 --> 01:18:57,640
Wait, what? So she
might not be pregnant?

1503
01:18:57,720 --> 01:18:59,760
Yo, where you
escape from, man?

1504
01:18:59,850 --> 01:19:03,140
I'm saying the baby might be Carl's,
but it might still be mine.

1505
01:19:03,230 --> 01:19:04,810
Okay, then
forget what I said.

1506
01:19:04,890 --> 01:19:05,940
I'm trying to
play catch-up here.

1507
01:19:06,020 --> 01:19:08,270
So you get
your sister pregnant,

1508
01:19:08,360 --> 01:19:10,270
but she slept with him?
No, she's not my sister.

1509
01:19:10,360 --> 01:19:14,360
She's an ignorant white trash woman
that I paid to carry my kid.

1510
01:19:15,610 --> 01:19:16,780
I deserve that.

1511
01:19:16,860 --> 01:19:17,860
No, you don't.

1512
01:19:17,950 --> 01:19:18,990
How could you do that?

1513
01:19:19,070 --> 01:19:20,490
This is why I didn't
call you back, Rob,

1514
01:19:20,580 --> 01:19:23,240
because this is the kind of
selfish, science fiction shit

1515
01:19:23,330 --> 01:19:24,870
that you don't
want any part of.

1516
01:19:26,460 --> 01:19:29,330
Well, the upside is, it looks
like I might be a dad.

1517
01:19:29,420 --> 01:19:31,880
So if it's a boy,
I want to marry you.

1518
01:19:31,960 --> 01:19:33,000
Oh, my God.

1519
01:19:34,630 --> 01:19:36,050
What?

1520
01:19:36,300 --> 01:19:38,090
I'm so sorry
about what's happened.

1521
01:19:38,180 --> 01:19:40,800
But I think it's best to wait until
the pregnancy is far enough along

1522
01:19:40,890 --> 01:19:43,850
for DNA testing, before
we do anything drastic.

1523
01:19:43,930 --> 01:19:44,930
(EXCLAIMS)

1524
01:19:45,850 --> 01:19:47,230
That was quite a kick.

1525
01:19:47,310 --> 01:19:48,390
How can you
be pregnant?

1526
01:19:48,480 --> 01:19:50,650
Your eggs are
from the '40s.

1527
01:19:52,230 --> 01:19:53,610
You're upset.

1528
01:19:53,690 --> 01:19:56,400
And you're saying hurtful things.
It's understandable.

1529
01:19:56,820 --> 01:19:59,240
We'll have a DNA sample
sent to the lab.

1530
01:19:59,320 --> 01:20:01,870
The rest will be
handled in family court.

1531
01:20:01,950 --> 01:20:06,580
Of course, if the baby turns out not
to be yours, we'll waive our fees.

1532
01:20:08,750 --> 01:20:10,330
What about all
the background checks?

1533
01:20:10,420 --> 01:20:12,880
Passed.
With flying colors.

1534
01:20:12,960 --> 01:20:16,010
You were living with her, and
you didn't notice anything.

1535
01:20:16,090 --> 01:20:17,800
She fooled us, Kate.

1536
01:20:17,880 --> 01:20:19,590
She fooled us all.

1537
01:20:20,930 --> 01:20:22,600
I fooled myself.

1538
01:20:34,270 --> 01:20:37,440
I booked you a room here,
until we sort this out.

1539
01:20:38,070 --> 01:20:41,240
So you're done with me, now, is that it?
You don't need me anymore?

1540
01:20:41,320 --> 01:20:44,240
Gonna try to find some
other lowlife you can use

1541
01:20:44,330 --> 01:20:46,200
to give you everything
you ever wanted?

1542
01:20:46,290 --> 01:20:47,700
I'm not gonna do this.

1543
01:20:47,790 --> 01:20:49,290
You know, you think
you're better than me...

1544
01:20:49,370 --> 01:20:52,630
I am certain that I
am better than you.

1545
01:20:53,090 --> 01:20:55,380
Okay, we're being honest now?

1546
01:20:55,460 --> 01:20:57,710
Here's one. I can have
a baby, and you can't.

1547
01:20:57,800 --> 01:20:58,880
And that drives you crazy.

1548
01:20:58,970 --> 01:21:00,630
Get out of my car.

1549
01:21:03,680 --> 01:21:05,970
Your stupid space car's
locked me in.

1550
01:21:06,100 --> 01:21:08,640
Don't touch it
when I'm touching it.

1551
01:21:09,350 --> 01:21:10,350
Just open it!

1552
01:21:10,440 --> 01:21:11,980
Yeah, you bang on the door,
that's how you open it.

1553
01:21:12,060 --> 01:21:13,810
Well, you can't
even find the stupid...

1554
01:21:13,900 --> 01:21:14,900
Raised by wolves!

1555
01:21:14,980 --> 01:21:16,070
Tell me
how to open it!

1556
01:21:16,150 --> 01:21:18,990
Stop touching it,
and I will open it.

1557
01:21:19,150 --> 01:21:20,190
(LOCK CLICKS)

1558
01:21:20,280 --> 01:21:21,700
lt is open now.

1559
01:21:21,780 --> 01:21:23,160
Good.

1560
01:21:43,930 --> 01:21:46,510
CARL: Look, buddy, you don't have to
sell me on the product, I'm already in.

1561
01:21:46,600 --> 01:21:47,600
Here's what I'm asking.

1562
01:21:47,680 --> 01:21:52,140
Do you have a discount policy if you're
related to one of the girls that's gone wild?

1563
01:21:58,980 --> 01:22:00,900
(POP MUSIC PLAYING)

1564
01:22:34,770 --> 01:22:37,810
Enjoy it, Kate.
This is your baby.

1565
01:22:40,280 --> 01:22:43,780
I'm going to go hide this
shell somewhere in the store.

1566
01:22:48,280 --> 01:22:49,740
Hey.

1567
01:22:52,200 --> 01:22:55,250
Can I get an Orange You
Glad I Didn't Say Banana?

1568
01:22:59,920 --> 01:23:01,340
(GAVEL POUNDING)

1569
01:23:01,420 --> 01:23:05,510
JUDGE: All right.
Holbrook v. Ostrowiski.

1570
01:23:05,590 --> 01:23:06,590
Present.

1571
01:23:06,680 --> 01:23:09,010
I take it this is
a paternity case.

1572
01:23:09,100 --> 01:23:11,760
Actually, it's a maternity
case, Your Honor.

1573
01:23:11,890 --> 01:23:14,390
Katherine Holbrook hired this
woman to be her surrogate,

1574
01:23:14,480 --> 01:23:16,060
now we're not sure
whose egg this is in here.

1575
01:23:16,140 --> 01:23:17,940
What are you doing here?

1576
01:23:18,020 --> 01:23:20,520
Angie needed some legal
help, so I'm helping.

1577
01:23:20,610 --> 01:23:22,400
And you are?
I'm Rob Ackerman,

1578
01:23:22,480 --> 01:23:25,240
formerly with the firm
Swanson and Weisberg.

1579
01:23:25,320 --> 01:23:26,950
Formerly?
Yeah, now he makes

1580
01:23:27,030 --> 01:23:28,530
fruit smoothies.

1581
01:23:29,160 --> 01:23:31,450
You mean like Jamba Juice?

1582
01:23:33,120 --> 01:23:35,960
Yes, Your Honor, it's
exactly like Jamba Juice.

1583
01:23:36,040 --> 01:23:38,370
'Cause I love Jamba Juice.

1584
01:23:38,710 --> 01:23:40,040
Yeah.
Who doesn't?

1585
01:23:40,130 --> 01:23:41,960
You don't need a lawyer,

1586
01:23:42,050 --> 01:23:43,710
you know, we're just here
to read some results.

1587
01:23:43,800 --> 01:23:46,800
But I know that I have
the right to a lawyer.

1588
01:23:47,260 --> 01:23:48,220
Objection.

1589
01:23:48,300 --> 01:23:49,390
And you are?

1590
01:23:49,470 --> 01:23:51,300
Carl Loomis,
Your Highness.

1591
01:23:51,850 --> 01:23:53,810
I'm here to seek joint
custody of that fetus.

1592
01:23:53,890 --> 01:23:55,890
Your Honor, this dummy
used to be my husband.

1593
01:23:55,980 --> 01:23:59,100
Did you provide a DNA sample, Mr.
Loomis?

1594
01:23:59,350 --> 01:24:00,350
Uh-huh.

1595
01:24:00,980 --> 01:24:02,770
What's that now?

1596
01:24:03,110 --> 01:24:06,940
Did you give someone a hair
follicle or a vial of your blood?

1597
01:24:07,450 --> 01:24:10,280
No. Not as it pertains
to this case.

1598
01:24:10,370 --> 01:24:11,950
All right, then you're going
to have to take a seat.

1599
01:24:12,030 --> 01:24:13,370
And if you disrupt
the proceedings again,

1600
01:24:13,450 --> 01:24:15,950
I'll ask the bailiff
to escort you out.

1601
01:24:16,040 --> 01:24:17,410
Not scared of her.

1602
01:24:17,500 --> 01:24:18,660
JUDGE: May I have
the lab results, please?

1603
01:24:18,750 --> 01:24:21,170
Okay, I would like to testify
on behalf of the prosecution.

1604
01:24:21,250 --> 01:24:23,090
There is no prosecution.

1605
01:24:23,300 --> 01:24:24,250
Aye, aye, sir.

1606
01:24:24,340 --> 01:24:25,460
If you insist,

1607
01:24:25,550 --> 01:24:27,550
you can make a statement and
have it entered on the record.

1608
01:24:27,670 --> 01:24:29,720
No, no, that's not necessary.
No, I insist.

1609
01:24:29,800 --> 01:24:32,050
I would like to say something.

1610
01:24:33,430 --> 01:24:34,850
I'm sorry.

1611
01:24:35,680 --> 01:24:38,270
I never should
have listened to Carl.

1612
01:24:38,390 --> 01:24:41,440
I should have done
the right thing. I just...

1613
01:24:41,770 --> 01:24:44,570
This whole thing
made you feel so happy.

1614
01:24:44,650 --> 01:24:47,030
And it made me
feel so important.

1615
01:24:48,030 --> 01:24:51,660
I should have told you the truth.
And I'm sorry I didn't.

1616
01:24:52,700 --> 01:24:54,370
I was just scared.

1617
01:24:55,990 --> 01:24:58,000
I also want to thank you.

1618
01:24:59,500 --> 01:25:02,750
I didn't like it sometimes,
but you made me grow up.

1619
01:25:03,790 --> 01:25:06,800
I know I was supposed to
help you have a baby.

1620
01:25:06,880 --> 01:25:09,970
But you ended up teaching me
how to be a mother.

1621
01:25:11,390 --> 01:25:14,550
So thank you.
And I'm sorry.

1622
01:25:16,220 --> 01:25:18,140
She'd be a great mom,
Your Honor.

1623
01:25:18,230 --> 01:25:19,430
Kid wouldn't
get away with shit.

1624
01:25:19,520 --> 01:25:21,310
JUDGE: Let's watch
the language, please.

1625
01:25:21,400 --> 01:25:23,350
Freedom of speech, look it
up, it's in the thing...

1626
01:25:23,440 --> 01:25:25,980
What Ms. Ostrowiski is
trying to say, Your Honor,

1627
01:25:26,070 --> 01:25:28,360
is that what
she did was wrong.

1628
01:25:28,440 --> 01:25:30,280
It was extremely wrong.

1629
01:25:30,360 --> 01:25:31,360
Cool it, you're my lawyer.

1630
01:25:31,450 --> 01:25:33,780
And one of these lies, that's
so easy to spin out of control.

1631
01:25:33,870 --> 01:25:36,910
This guy, Carl Loomis,
he lied to Angie.

1632
01:25:36,990 --> 01:25:40,330
And then Angie lied to Kate,
and Kate lied to me,

1633
01:25:40,540 --> 01:25:43,500
and it was a mistake.
I mean, it was a...

1634
01:25:43,750 --> 01:25:47,090
lt's a mess, this is all a... lt's a mess.
This is a real mess.

1635
01:25:47,170 --> 01:25:49,090
That's the worst closing
argument I've ever heard.

1636
01:25:49,170 --> 01:25:52,340
Yeah, I know.
I know. I'm a little rusty.

1637
01:25:52,430 --> 01:25:58,930
Kate. I just never wanted to come
back into a courtroom ever again.

1638
01:26:01,350 --> 01:26:03,100
And I came here for you.

1639
01:26:03,560 --> 01:26:04,980
Thank you.

1640
01:26:05,400 --> 01:26:07,310
I rest my case.

1641
01:26:07,940 --> 01:26:12,280
You Honor, I think we are more than
ready for you to read the results.

1642
01:26:14,490 --> 01:26:19,490
Let the record show that the DNA
test indicates that Ms. Holbrook

1643
01:26:20,830 --> 01:26:23,290
is not the mother
of this child.

1644
01:26:50,820 --> 01:26:51,900
Okay to get home?

1645
01:26:51,990 --> 01:26:53,400
Of course.
Yeah.

1646
01:26:55,570 --> 01:26:59,450
I remember the day I found out
I was going to have a kid.

1647
01:27:00,080 --> 01:27:03,000
Wow. I'll never take it
for granted again.

1648
01:27:05,000 --> 01:27:07,170
Well, I'd still like
to meet that kid some time.

1649
01:27:07,250 --> 01:27:09,380
I'll give you a call.
You come by the store.

1650
01:27:10,210 --> 01:27:12,670
Okay, I'll definitely come by.

1651
01:27:13,260 --> 01:27:14,670
Okay.

1652
01:27:15,260 --> 01:27:16,840
I'm sorry, Kate.

1653
01:27:16,930 --> 01:27:18,340
It's okay.

1654
01:27:18,430 --> 01:27:20,890
I just threw up.

1655
01:27:29,520 --> 01:27:32,070
You look nice in a suit,
by the way.

1656
01:27:38,320 --> 01:27:40,660
(SENTIMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)

1657
01:28:00,220 --> 01:28:02,640
Angie.

1658
01:28:02,720 --> 01:28:04,310
Hey.

1659
01:28:05,980 --> 01:28:08,390
So, I guess
I'll see you later?

1660
01:28:08,850 --> 01:28:10,980
Probably not, actually.

1661
01:28:11,230 --> 01:28:12,230
Right.

1662
01:28:13,400 --> 01:28:16,110
I've been off Dr.
Pepper for two weeks.

1663
01:28:16,990 --> 01:28:18,490
This is water.

1664
01:28:19,070 --> 01:28:20,320
Good for you.

1665
01:28:20,410 --> 01:28:21,530
Thanks.

1666
01:28:22,410 --> 01:28:23,910
(LIQUID SPLASHING)

1667
01:28:24,870 --> 01:28:26,500
Angie, I think
your water broke.

1668
01:28:26,580 --> 01:28:27,620
Wait, what?

1669
01:28:27,710 --> 01:28:29,000
Your water is breaking.

1670
01:28:29,080 --> 01:28:30,670
I got to get a bus to
take me to the hospital.

1671
01:28:30,750 --> 01:28:31,630
Let me drive you,
I'll drive you.

1672
01:28:31,710 --> 01:28:33,000
Okay, hold this.

1673
01:28:33,090 --> 01:28:34,840
I'm not due for three weeks.
I know.

1674
01:28:34,920 --> 01:28:35,880
Should we
clean that up?

1675
01:28:35,960 --> 01:28:37,760
No, somebody else
will get that.

1676
01:28:46,640 --> 01:28:48,600
This is really happening,
isn't it?

1677
01:28:48,690 --> 01:28:50,480
This is really happening.

1678
01:28:50,730 --> 01:28:53,020
It's so weird,
'cause I feel totally calm.

1679
01:28:53,900 --> 01:28:56,360
Come on, it feels like I'm
shitting a knife. Okay.

1680
01:28:56,440 --> 01:28:57,780
Why won't you
bitches help me?

1681
01:28:57,860 --> 01:28:58,860
Just breathe.

1682
01:28:58,950 --> 01:29:00,360
Okay, I'll take it
from here.

1683
01:29:00,450 --> 01:29:01,530
I want to go with her.

1684
01:29:01,620 --> 01:29:02,780
Are you family?

1685
01:29:02,870 --> 01:29:03,870
She's my sister.

1686
01:29:03,950 --> 01:29:05,200
Well, okay.

1687
01:29:05,290 --> 01:29:06,620
Oh, God, holy...

1688
01:29:08,500 --> 01:29:10,830
This way.
Sorry, sorry.

1689
01:29:10,960 --> 01:29:12,880
Give me some drugs. Give me this.
You don't need drugs.

1690
01:29:12,960 --> 01:29:14,380
I want those drugs.
No.

1691
01:29:14,460 --> 01:29:16,090
You'll never
get me, pig!

1692
01:29:16,170 --> 01:29:17,800
(SCREAMING)

1693
01:29:17,880 --> 01:29:19,170
Get out of my way!

1694
01:29:19,300 --> 01:29:20,470
Oh, God!

1695
01:29:20,550 --> 01:29:22,130
(GLASS SMASHING)
Angie!

1696
01:29:26,010 --> 01:29:28,060
Is that guy dead?
Is he dead?

1697
01:29:28,140 --> 01:29:30,350
We need some olive oil
to rub on my taint.

1698
01:29:30,440 --> 01:29:32,770
It's too late.
It's too late.

1699
01:29:33,270 --> 01:29:34,900
Okay, this is
gonna go great.

1700
01:29:34,980 --> 01:29:36,070
Yeah.

1701
01:29:36,150 --> 01:29:38,320
Kate.

1702
01:29:38,940 --> 01:29:40,650
It's twins.

1703
01:29:43,030 --> 01:29:44,530
Gross.

1704
01:29:44,910 --> 01:29:46,120
I don't know
what you're crying about.

1705
01:29:46,200 --> 01:29:47,990
I gotta walk out
of here alone.

1706
01:29:48,080 --> 01:29:50,540
That's a good joke,
Dr. Manheim.

1707
01:29:51,500 --> 01:29:52,710
Okay.

1708
01:29:52,790 --> 01:29:54,210
Okay, and give me
a big one.

1709
01:29:54,290 --> 01:29:57,960
Big one! Whoa!

1710
01:29:58,510 --> 01:30:00,800
Nothing. Okay.
All right, ready?

1711
01:30:00,880 --> 01:30:02,840
Kate, I'm so glad
you're here.

1712
01:30:03,590 --> 01:30:04,720
You don't look good,
by the way.

1713
01:30:04,800 --> 01:30:06,300
I feel a little dizzy.

1714
01:30:06,430 --> 01:30:08,180
Okay. Okay, and
give me a big one.

1715
01:30:08,270 --> 01:30:11,350
Big one. Whoa.

1716
01:30:12,140 --> 01:30:13,350
(BABY CRYING)

1717
01:30:16,190 --> 01:30:17,690
CAROLINE: Good morning.

1718
01:30:22,700 --> 01:30:24,450
Hi.
How are you feeling?

1719
01:30:24,530 --> 01:30:27,240
Embarrassed. I fainted
in the delivery room.

1720
01:30:27,330 --> 01:30:29,160
Well, Oscar's bringing you
a change of clothes,

1721
01:30:29,240 --> 01:30:31,450
and Mom is here,
in case you die.

1722
01:30:31,540 --> 01:30:32,710
Great.

1723
01:30:32,790 --> 01:30:35,540
And somebody else
wants to say hi. Hey.

1724
01:30:38,040 --> 01:30:39,710
It's embarrassing.

1725
01:30:42,840 --> 01:30:44,970
I'm scared your friend, Angie,
has me on speed dial.

1726
01:30:45,050 --> 01:30:47,470
She called me, like, 10 times to
get down here and take care of you.

1727
01:30:47,550 --> 01:30:48,850
Me, too.
How is she?

1728
01:30:48,930 --> 01:30:50,100
How is the baby?

1729
01:30:50,180 --> 01:30:52,770
Great, she's just...
She's beautiful.

1730
01:30:52,850 --> 01:30:53,850
It's a girl.

1731
01:30:53,940 --> 01:30:55,100
Got a smile...

1732
01:30:55,190 --> 01:30:56,560
Good morning.
Hello.

1733
01:30:56,650 --> 01:30:57,650
Hi.

1734
01:30:57,730 --> 01:30:59,820
Hi, there. Hi.

1735
01:31:00,030 --> 01:31:01,480
Could I have a moment
alone with Kate, please?

1736
01:31:01,570 --> 01:31:04,190
Sure. I'm going to
go check on Mom.

1737
01:31:06,160 --> 01:31:07,820
Hi. How can I help you?

1738
01:31:07,910 --> 01:31:11,040
Hi. Well, we got
your blood work back.

1739
01:31:11,120 --> 01:31:14,250
You are slightly anemic,
which explains the fainting.

1740
01:31:14,330 --> 01:31:15,500
But there's something else
you need to know.

1741
01:31:15,580 --> 01:31:17,000
You're pregnant.

1742
01:31:18,340 --> 01:31:19,670
That's impossible.

1743
01:31:19,750 --> 01:31:22,250
I paid a man thousands of dollars
to tell me that that's impossible.

1744
01:31:22,340 --> 01:31:26,220
Well, you're only about eight weeks
along, but you are definitely pregnant.

1745
01:31:26,380 --> 01:31:28,470
He said the chances
were one in a million.

1746
01:31:28,600 --> 01:31:31,680
Well, I'd start buying lottery
tickets, if I were you.

1747
01:31:31,850 --> 01:31:34,020
Wait a minute.

1748
01:31:34,100 --> 01:31:35,230
Congrats.

1749
01:31:38,270 --> 01:31:40,230
Rob.

1750
01:31:43,610 --> 01:31:45,360
I'm pregnant.
What?

1751
01:31:45,450 --> 01:31:48,280
I'm pregnant.

1752
01:31:49,570 --> 01:31:51,030
You okay?

1753
01:31:51,120 --> 01:31:52,280
Oh, my God.

1754
01:31:54,910 --> 01:31:57,210
Hi. Can I see her?

1755
01:31:58,500 --> 01:32:01,790
She's gorgeous.
What's her name?

1756
01:32:01,960 --> 01:32:03,880
This is Stef.

1757
01:32:03,960 --> 01:32:06,380
Stephanie,
that's beautiful.

1758
01:32:06,470 --> 01:32:09,220
No, Stefani.
Like Gwen Stefani.

1759
01:32:10,300 --> 01:32:12,510
Even better. Hello.

1760
01:32:13,310 --> 01:32:15,020
Are you waking up?

1761
01:32:15,770 --> 01:32:17,270
So, you're pregnant.

1762
01:32:17,600 --> 01:32:18,730
How'd you know that?

1763
01:32:18,810 --> 01:32:21,060
I can read
people's energies.

1764
01:32:21,480 --> 01:32:23,900
Plus, your sister told me.

1765
01:32:29,450 --> 01:32:33,030
ALL: (SINGING)
Happy birthday to you

1766
01:32:33,790 --> 01:32:40,000
Happy birthday,
dear Stefani

1767
01:32:40,290 --> 01:32:44,750
Happy birthday to you

1768
01:32:55,060 --> 01:32:56,600
Hey, Angie.

1769
01:32:58,180 --> 01:32:59,640
Are you two
still together?

1770
01:32:59,730 --> 01:33:01,560
No, we're not together.

1771
01:33:01,860 --> 01:33:05,520
He's just trying to be a better
father, take some parenting classes.

1772
01:33:09,530 --> 01:33:11,070
He just started.

1773
01:33:13,370 --> 01:33:14,410
I see you.

1774
01:33:20,040 --> 01:33:24,130
You think you're funny, punk? What'd
I tell you about hiding from me?

1775
01:33:25,460 --> 01:33:28,960
Quit hiding from me.
You think you're funny?

1776
01:33:30,090 --> 01:33:31,590
Hello.

1777
01:33:42,850 --> 01:33:46,020
This is a gasoline-powered
mini-Ninja motorcycle.

1778
01:33:46,110 --> 01:33:47,110
Oh, my God, Carl.

1779
01:33:47,190 --> 01:33:49,190
You bought a motorcycle
for a one-year-old?

1780
01:33:49,280 --> 01:33:51,280
That is crazy.
Really crazy.

1781
01:33:51,360 --> 01:33:53,820
That's exactly
what she wanted! Yay!

1782
01:33:53,910 --> 01:33:55,280
That's great.

1783
01:34:04,040 --> 01:34:07,040
Kate, let me give
your baby my mojo.

1784
01:34:15,680 --> 01:34:18,680
Well, time is love.
Got to run.

1785
01:34:20,770 --> 01:34:21,770
Whoa!

1786
01:34:35,410 --> 01:34:37,030
(BABIES GURGLING)

1787
01:34:44,460 --> 01:34:47,290
I love this episode.

1788
01:34:56,470 --> 01:34:59,810
('60s POP MUSIC PLAYING)