1
00:00:35,856 --> 00:00:40,269
For the zillionth time, Dad,
I'm an adult. You don't have to stalk me.
2
00:00:40,402 --> 00:00:42,258
Georgia,
I said I'm dropping you off.
3
00:00:42,404 --> 00:00:46,023
Now, just take off that shell
and get in the car.
4
00:00:46,158 --> 00:00:50,571
Dad, my costume is the business.
I don't want it to get crushed.
5
00:00:51,872 --> 00:00:53,070
You look fantastic, love.
6
00:00:53,207 --> 00:00:55,579
I just don't want you
walking around the streets on your own.
7
00:00:55,709 --> 00:00:59,292
Do you have any idea
how long it took to get this right?
8
00:00:59,421 --> 00:01:01,580
I have to make an entrance.
9
00:01:03,926 --> 00:01:05,337
What's that?
10
00:01:11,976 --> 00:01:14,348
And what are you supposed to be?
An obese leprechaun?
11
00:01:14,478 --> 00:01:16,554
Anyone can see I'm a stuffed olive.
12
00:01:16,689 --> 00:01:18,765
Stuffed is right.
13
00:01:26,156 --> 00:01:27,983
What happened to you, Ellen?
14
00:01:28,117 --> 00:01:30,406
You were supposed to come
as a cocktail sausage.
15
00:01:30,536 --> 00:01:34,581
Well, my mum said no,
her being a vegetarian and all.
16
00:01:34,707 --> 00:01:37,494
Jas? Cheese and pineapple stick?
17
00:01:38,168 --> 00:01:42,629
Well, the cheese made me look fat
and yellow washes me out.
18
00:01:43,007 --> 00:01:45,877
I didn't know how to be a vol au vent.
19
00:01:46,010 --> 00:01:48,761
But we said we'd all go
as hors d'oeuvres to be original.
20
00:01:48,888 --> 00:01:51,094
It was supposed to be a laugh.
21
00:01:51,223 --> 00:01:54,094
But boys don't like girls for funniness.
22
00:01:55,436 --> 00:01:57,428
Sorry, Georgia.
Wait, Georgia.
23
00:01:57,563 --> 00:02:00,350
Georgia, don't go.
Georgia!
24
00:04:24,919 --> 00:04:26,329
Ow.
25
00:04:30,132 --> 00:04:31,377
Georgia, what are you doing?
26
00:04:31,508 --> 00:04:33,548
You'll be late for your first day
back at school.
27
00:04:33,677 --> 00:04:35,337
I'm coming.
28
00:04:37,765 --> 00:04:41,549
- Georgia, Mummy wants you.
- Libby.
29
00:04:42,061 --> 00:04:43,057
Oh!
30
00:04:44,146 --> 00:04:47,017
Oh, flip, flipper and flipping hell!
31
00:04:59,036 --> 00:05:02,654
Excusez-moi. C'est trés grotesque.
32
00:05:04,542 --> 00:05:06,618
If you don't mind?
33
00:05:08,754 --> 00:05:10,545
Oi! Cheeky.
34
00:05:13,300 --> 00:05:15,874
Libby, stop putting Angus in the fridge.
35
00:05:16,011 --> 00:05:18,383
What do you want
for breakfast, munchkin?
36
00:05:18,514 --> 00:05:20,008
Stuffed olive?
37
00:05:23,769 --> 00:05:28,230
Just because I did something so beyond
the Valley of Sad City last night
38
00:05:28,357 --> 00:05:32,818
it doesn't give you the right,
as my parents, to humiliate me further.
39
00:05:36,657 --> 00:05:40,026
Today is the first day of my life
as the new Georgia.
40
00:05:40,160 --> 00:05:42,449
- And who is she, my little elf?
- Ugh!
41
00:05:43,706 --> 00:05:47,454
She's not an "elf". Not a munchkin.
42
00:05:47,585 --> 00:05:51,796
She is a mature, sophisticated woman
called Ms Georgia Nicolson.
43
00:05:51,922 --> 00:05:54,840
So, to celebrate the new me,
44
00:05:54,967 --> 00:05:58,300
I've decided what I want to do
for my birthday party this year.
45
00:05:58,429 --> 00:06:03,387
I want a proper party in a club,
with a D.J.
46
00:06:03,517 --> 00:06:07,100
You're not old enough to get into a club,
never mind hire one out for a party.
47
00:06:07,229 --> 00:06:10,100
If you haven't noticed, I'm a woman now.
48
00:06:11,233 --> 00:06:12,692
I wear a bra!
49
00:06:15,779 --> 00:06:16,859
Bob.
50
00:06:16,989 --> 00:06:20,358
Are you really trying to
damage me permanently?
51
00:06:20,492 --> 00:06:23,197
There's no way that you are having
a party in a club
52
00:06:23,329 --> 00:06:26,698
where there's drinking,
and it's full of randy men.
53
00:06:26,832 --> 00:06:28,410
What sort of parents
do you think we are?
54
00:06:28,542 --> 00:06:31,247
- Do you really want me to answer that?
- That's enough, missy.
55
00:06:31,378 --> 00:06:33,751
- Why would we damage you?
- We made you.
56
00:06:33,881 --> 00:06:34,960
Honestly, Georgia, this attitude is...
57
00:06:35,090 --> 00:06:39,384
Welcome to the tragic
universe that is my sad life.
58
00:06:39,512 --> 00:06:42,762
Why? I'll give you
five major reasons why.
59
00:06:42,890 --> 00:06:46,010
Number one,
my parents are from the Stone Age.
60
00:06:46,143 --> 00:06:47,970
- No us, no you.
- God knows what you'd do.
61
00:06:48,103 --> 00:06:49,183
- You understand? You wouldn't exist.
- Yeah.
62
00:06:49,313 --> 00:06:51,471
Number two, they hate me
having a life
63
00:06:51,607 --> 00:06:53,398
'cause theirs are practically over
64
00:06:53,526 --> 00:06:54,688
and mine's just starting.
65
00:06:54,818 --> 00:06:56,811
And it's not good enough.
- Honestly. Every year it's...
66
00:06:56,946 --> 00:06:58,191
Number three.
a performance...
67
00:06:58,322 --> 00:07:02,818
My little sister's bonkers. Poor Angus
will need even more therapy than me.
68
00:07:02,952 --> 00:07:04,114
A lot of trouble!
69
00:07:04,245 --> 00:07:05,822
because
of your fifteenth birthday...
70
00:07:05,955 --> 00:07:07,069
- Number four...
it's not good enough.
71
00:07:07,206 --> 00:07:10,789
- ... my nose is the size of Jupiter.
so ungrateful.
72
00:07:10,918 --> 00:07:12,827
- I need to go into an ugly home.
Georgia,
73
00:07:12,962 --> 00:07:14,871
what have you gone and done now?
74
00:07:15,005 --> 00:07:17,247
How did you manage
to pluck them all so quickly?
75
00:07:17,383 --> 00:07:20,586
You haven't, have you?
76
00:07:20,719 --> 00:07:23,970
Oh, crikey. Bob, she shaved them.
77
00:07:24,098 --> 00:07:27,052
Number five,
I'll never get a boyfriend.
78
00:07:27,184 --> 00:07:28,892
What's the hurry
with growing up so fast?
79
00:07:29,019 --> 00:07:31,557
Why don't you just enjoy being 14?
80
00:07:34,233 --> 00:07:38,610
Enjoy being 14?
How twisted is that?
81
00:07:38,737 --> 00:07:40,647
And if home isn't mental enough,
82
00:07:40,781 --> 00:07:46,368
I have to spend all day at this loony bin,
or as some people call it, school.
83
00:07:48,706 --> 00:07:52,573
Sometimes I think Jas and I are
the only normal people here.
84
00:07:53,419 --> 00:07:54,664
There's Dave the Laugh.
85
00:07:56,547 --> 00:07:59,880
- Why do they even call him that?
Okay, now get this one.
86
00:08:00,009 --> 00:08:01,467
Boys are such a mystery.
87
00:08:01,594 --> 00:08:04,167
- Yeah, how was that?
- Oi, Nicolson! Watch it.
88
00:08:04,305 --> 00:08:06,760
The Bummer Twins
are the school bullies.
89
00:08:06,891 --> 00:08:08,433
- Twice as mean.
- What?
90
00:08:08,559 --> 00:08:10,053
Twice as mingy.
91
00:08:13,022 --> 00:08:15,809
Lindsay "Slag" Marling
from the year above.
92
00:08:15,941 --> 00:08:18,728
She really is Miss Slag of the Century.
93
00:08:20,529 --> 00:08:23,316
And where did she get
those bazoomas?
94
00:08:23,449 --> 00:08:25,821
How did they grow that fast?
95
00:08:27,661 --> 00:08:30,448
Two minutes to lessons, children.
96
00:08:30,581 --> 00:08:34,579
Let's not start the term
with a detention, Nicolson.
97
00:08:34,710 --> 00:08:37,497
Our headmistress, Slim,
likes to oppress me,
98
00:08:37,630 --> 00:08:39,871
'cause I caught her once
with her skirt in her knickers.
99
00:08:40,007 --> 00:08:42,249
I laughed so much I nearly fainted.
100
00:08:44,136 --> 00:08:47,007
- Hey, guys!
- Luckily I've got my Ace Gang
101
00:08:47,139 --> 00:08:49,511
to fill in the long hours
before we get released.
102
00:08:49,642 --> 00:08:52,014
Christmas tree.
- D.J. Whoo-hoo!
103
00:08:52,645 --> 00:08:55,729
Ellen, Rosie, Jas and moi.
104
00:08:56,899 --> 00:09:01,561
Now, when your hands are numb you lift
them up to your bazoomas and press.
105
00:09:03,280 --> 00:09:05,522
See? It feels like someone else
is touching them,
106
00:09:05,658 --> 00:09:06,772
not your own hands, right?
107
00:09:06,909 --> 00:09:11,785
- Wow. Freakilicious.
- Oh, I could get used to this.
108
00:09:11,914 --> 00:09:15,994
I don't think we should be doing this.
It's kind of lesbiany.
109
00:09:16,126 --> 00:09:19,412
Well, you asked me
what it was like to be felt up.
110
00:09:21,257 --> 00:09:24,922
So, what's the best thing
about having a boyfriend then?
111
00:09:25,427 --> 00:09:28,678
It just feels really natural.
You know, really grown up.
112
00:09:28,806 --> 00:09:30,929
And the snogging is wicked.
113
00:09:31,058 --> 00:09:34,676
Sven uses varying pressure.
That's what foreign boys do.
114
00:09:36,230 --> 00:09:39,100
My parents snog occasionally.
Even at their age.
115
00:09:39,233 --> 00:09:40,727
Ugh! Cringey.
116
00:09:40,860 --> 00:09:46,364
Seeing old people over the age of 30
snogging is just horrific.
117
00:09:46,490 --> 00:09:51,485
Of all of the boys I've ever snogged,
Sven is definitely the best.
118
00:09:51,620 --> 00:09:53,079
'Cause he's emotional.
119
00:09:53,205 --> 00:09:54,830
Where have you got to
on the snogging scale?
120
00:09:54,957 --> 00:09:56,368
What?
121
00:09:56,500 --> 00:10:01,043
Jas and I invented a snogging scale.
The Ten Stages of Snogging.
122
00:10:01,171 --> 00:10:04,540
- You're mad.
- No. It's scientific.
123
00:10:04,675 --> 00:10:07,676
- How would you know anything about it?
- Please.
124
00:10:07,803 --> 00:10:11,006
- Who got 82% in Bio?
- True.
125
00:10:12,016 --> 00:10:14,055
We cut out all the letters about kissing
126
00:10:14,185 --> 00:10:16,936
from the problem pages
of every girls' magazine.
127
00:10:17,062 --> 00:10:19,980
So, it starts with level one,
holding hands.
128
00:10:20,149 --> 00:10:23,600
Two, arms around waist.
Three, good night kiss.
129
00:10:23,736 --> 00:10:28,065
Four, kiss lasting over three minutes
without breath.
130
00:10:29,325 --> 00:10:34,200
- Five, open mouth kissing.
- Number six, tongues.
131
00:10:34,455 --> 00:10:36,661
Oh!
- Oh, my God.
132
00:10:39,376 --> 00:10:43,421
Seven, upper body fondling outdoors.
133
00:10:43,547 --> 00:10:49,917
Eight... Oh, my God.
134
00:10:55,768 --> 00:10:57,891
I've gone all jelloid.
135
00:10:59,230 --> 00:11:03,975
Who are those fitties?
- They're well beyond fit, they're lush.
136
00:11:05,486 --> 00:11:07,644
They are sex gods.
137
00:11:07,905 --> 00:11:13,694
Ohh! They must be newbies.
- Ace Gang, it's boy-stalking time.
138
00:11:29,635 --> 00:11:31,010
Ladies?
139
00:11:58,497 --> 00:11:59,991
- They have mushy peas and chips.
- Yeah, yeah.
140
00:12:00,124 --> 00:12:01,322
Yeah, definitely.
141
00:12:29,320 --> 00:12:30,600
I want them!
142
00:12:35,534 --> 00:12:36,732
Ah!
143
00:12:36,869 --> 00:12:40,452
You're here. You're late. Get changed.
We're going on a family outing.
144
00:12:40,581 --> 00:12:42,704
- Do we have to?
- What do you mean, do we have to?
145
00:12:42,833 --> 00:12:44,458
You used to love doing things
with the family.
146
00:12:44,585 --> 00:12:46,957
Georgia, don't start, not tonight.
We're going to the Bonker's Buffet
147
00:12:47,087 --> 00:12:48,202
and your granddad's coming as well.
148
00:12:51,091 --> 00:12:52,550
Oh, look out.
149
00:12:54,136 --> 00:12:55,215
Oh! Uh-oh.
150
00:12:55,721 --> 00:12:56,919
Oh, no.
151
00:13:00,768 --> 00:13:03,306
They're Granddad's teeth.
152
00:13:08,234 --> 00:13:10,191
Granddad's teeth.
153
00:13:12,821 --> 00:13:14,898
So, the sex gods are twins.
154
00:13:15,074 --> 00:13:17,944
- C'est magnifique.
- Marvy.
155
00:13:18,077 --> 00:13:22,454
- But they're not identical.
- Obviously, Jas.
156
00:13:22,581 --> 00:13:24,040
They're two years above us.
157
00:13:24,166 --> 00:13:26,788
Jackie's got Geography
with the one called Tom.
158
00:13:26,919 --> 00:13:29,161
She says he just moved here
from London.
159
00:13:29,296 --> 00:13:33,543
London! I knew they were cosmopolitan.
160
00:13:33,676 --> 00:13:36,712
Apparently their family just opened
an organic shop on the high street.
161
00:13:36,846 --> 00:13:38,090
Mmm!
162
00:13:38,264 --> 00:13:40,837
Dishy and nutritious.
163
00:13:40,975 --> 00:13:43,382
So, G, Tom or Robbie?
Which brother do you want?
164
00:13:44,645 --> 00:13:47,218
- What about me?
- El, we saw them first.
165
00:13:47,356 --> 00:13:49,016
That's not fair!
166
00:13:49,149 --> 00:13:53,646
Ellen, you have to be emotionally
sorted to be ready for a boyfriend.
167
00:13:53,779 --> 00:13:56,946
Jas and I are there.
We even devised a snogging scale.
168
00:13:57,074 --> 00:13:58,319
That proves it.
169
00:13:58,450 --> 00:14:01,950
We have to know ourselves,
to see how boys see us.
170
00:14:02,079 --> 00:14:03,906
Can you handle that?
171
00:14:06,584 --> 00:14:09,668
Okay, so it's time for the
Physical Attractiveness Test.
172
00:14:37,656 --> 00:14:38,985
Finished.
173
00:14:46,081 --> 00:14:49,747
Oh! You lot are so sweet.
I got mostly eights for everything.
174
00:14:49,877 --> 00:14:50,992
- So did I.
- Me, too.
175
00:14:51,128 --> 00:14:54,497
Hey, who gave me a four for my nose?
176
00:14:54,632 --> 00:14:59,459
And look. Someone else
gave my mouth a six and one third.
177
00:14:59,595 --> 00:15:01,753
What's wrong with my mouth?
178
00:15:09,730 --> 00:15:11,806
God, I'm having a nervy B.
179
00:15:11,941 --> 00:15:14,514
We've only gone over the plan
a gazillion times.
180
00:15:14,652 --> 00:15:18,566
You don't need to have a breakdown.
Just stick to your lines and we'll be fine.
181
00:15:18,697 --> 00:15:21,105
Okay. How's my hair?
182
00:15:21,242 --> 00:15:24,990
Very Keira Knightley.
Just get in there, you minger.
183
00:15:25,120 --> 00:15:29,201
Remember, lower your voice
so you sound sexier.
184
00:15:29,333 --> 00:15:30,448
Okay.
185
00:15:38,092 --> 00:15:40,962
Hi there, how are you?
- Oh, fine, thanks.
186
00:15:41,470 --> 00:15:45,598
- Can I get some onions please?
- Onions. Red ones?
187
00:15:45,724 --> 00:15:47,183
- Yeah.
- How many?
188
00:15:47,309 --> 00:15:49,349
Just a pound, please.
189
00:15:49,478 --> 00:15:50,759
- A pound.
- Yeah.
190
00:15:50,896 --> 00:15:53,387
- These are nice ones, these are.
- Great.
191
00:15:54,692 --> 00:15:56,020
What are you doing?
192
00:16:04,076 --> 00:16:07,527
Jas? Hey, Jas. Quelle surprise.
193
00:16:09,206 --> 00:16:11,697
What a shock to see you here.
194
00:16:12,376 --> 00:16:13,407
I want this brother.
195
00:16:13,544 --> 00:16:16,628
That's fine.
Just stop playing with your hair.
196
00:16:20,384 --> 00:16:22,293
How nice
to see you, Georgia.
197
00:16:22,428 --> 00:16:25,001
I was just picking up some
onions for my mum.
198
00:16:25,139 --> 00:16:29,137
Well, you know your onions,
don't you, Jas?
199
00:16:29,268 --> 00:16:32,222
You've been eating
organic food for ages.
200
00:16:32,354 --> 00:16:33,813
Cool.
201
00:16:33,939 --> 00:16:36,561
Oh, I'm sorry.
This is my friend, Georgia.
202
00:16:36,692 --> 00:16:39,728
- I'm Jas.
- Hi, I'm Tom.
203
00:16:39,862 --> 00:16:42,435
Do you need something
for a sore throat?
204
00:16:44,450 --> 00:16:46,407
- So, what school are you two at?
- Ridgley.
205
00:16:46,535 --> 00:16:48,824
Ridgley? Me, too. Just started.
206
00:16:51,040 --> 00:16:52,415
- Here you go.
- Thanks, Robbie.
207
00:16:52,541 --> 00:16:55,626
That's all right. Can't let my brother
work hard serving good looking girls
208
00:16:55,753 --> 00:16:57,211
without a cup of tea.
209
00:17:00,925 --> 00:17:02,419
Sorry?
210
00:17:02,551 --> 00:17:07,260
- Apples. She likes apples.
- Great.
211
00:17:07,389 --> 00:17:09,216
About a pound, yeah?
212
00:17:10,309 --> 00:17:13,885
Robbie, this is Jas and Georgia.
They go to Ridgley too.
213
00:17:14,522 --> 00:17:17,273
Okay. Yeah,
I thought I recognised them.
214
00:17:17,399 --> 00:17:20,353
Tom, I got to move. I got band practice.
215
00:17:20,486 --> 00:17:23,522
- You're in a band.
- Yeah, some mates from London.
216
00:17:23,656 --> 00:17:25,529
- Oh, what are you called?
- The Stiff Dylans.
217
00:17:25,658 --> 00:17:27,615
- Great name.
- Thanks.
218
00:17:27,743 --> 00:17:28,906
I'm a bass player.
219
00:17:29,036 --> 00:17:32,286
Did you know bass players
have really big hands?
220
00:17:33,332 --> 00:17:36,119
I guess they do.
I do have big hands.
221
00:17:37,670 --> 00:17:43,126
Hey, Jubbly. Is that my little Jubbly?
Come here, little Jubbly Jubbly.
222
00:17:43,259 --> 00:17:46,343
- You like cats?
- Yeah, love them.
223
00:17:46,470 --> 00:17:51,713
Don't I, lovely Jubbly? Do you have one?
224
00:17:53,853 --> 00:17:56,344
Angus. Her cat's called Angus.
225
00:17:57,565 --> 00:18:00,103
He's part Scottish wildcat.
226
00:18:00,234 --> 00:18:04,314
I used to walk him by the sea.
But he ate his collar.
227
00:18:04,446 --> 00:18:05,822
- And his lead.
- What?
228
00:18:05,948 --> 00:18:07,193
Georgia?
229
00:18:08,367 --> 00:18:11,617
What are you doing here?
You hate vegetables.
230
00:18:12,913 --> 00:18:17,824
Mum, you're so funny.
I'm getting apples.
231
00:18:18,460 --> 00:18:21,461
- My favourites.
- But apples give you wind.
232
00:18:30,014 --> 00:18:31,009
Oh!
233
00:18:33,267 --> 00:18:35,639
What a lovely selection of Brie.
234
00:18:41,483 --> 00:18:44,437
How am I ever
going to be able to face him again?
235
00:18:44,570 --> 00:18:46,609
My mum
is so beyond the Valley of the Thick.
236
00:18:46,739 --> 00:18:49,859
- She wasn't that bad.
- What? Telling the only cool boy
237
00:18:49,992 --> 00:18:52,234
in Eastbourne I have flatulence issues
is okay?
238
00:18:52,369 --> 00:18:54,196
I don't think he took any notice.
239
00:18:54,330 --> 00:18:57,449
And, anyway, he was well into you
before your mum came in.
240
00:18:57,583 --> 00:18:58,994
- Do you think so?
- Yeah.
241
00:18:59,126 --> 00:19:02,293
You were great asking him
about his band and stuff.
242
00:19:02,421 --> 00:19:04,627
- And he likes cats, like me.
- Yep.
243
00:19:04,757 --> 00:19:07,627
Did you see the way Tom held onto
my hand a little too much
244
00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:09,836
- when he gave me the onions?
- He didn't!
245
00:19:09,970 --> 00:19:11,548
He is so gorgeous!
246
00:19:11,680 --> 00:19:14,634
They're both beyond
the Valley of the Gorgeous.
247
00:19:14,767 --> 00:19:16,427
Oh, are you sure
my mum hasn't ruined it?
248
00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:19,098
Oh, GG, it was really fab.
249
00:19:19,230 --> 00:19:21,306
- Fabbity fab?
- With knobs on.
250
00:19:21,440 --> 00:19:24,774
And Robbie will understand.
All parents say stupid things.
251
00:19:24,902 --> 00:19:26,361
He'll probably like you more
'cause he'll feel bad
252
00:19:26,487 --> 00:19:28,729
you've got a mum
that's beyond bonkerdom.
253
00:19:28,864 --> 00:19:30,656
You're right.
254
00:19:30,783 --> 00:19:34,068
God, Robbie's just so
muscley and dreamy and... Ah!
255
00:19:34,203 --> 00:19:39,707
- Tom said, "See you later. "
- I know. So did Robbie.
256
00:19:39,833 --> 00:19:43,878
- What exactly does that mean?
- I'm not sure.
257
00:19:44,004 --> 00:19:45,380
Do you think Tom says that to everyone
258
00:19:45,506 --> 00:19:47,997
like a sort of "See you later"
sort of thing?
259
00:19:48,133 --> 00:19:53,923
No. He wouldn't say "See you later"
slowly unless he means "See you later. "
260
00:19:54,682 --> 00:19:57,469
Otherwise he would just say
"See ya later. "
261
00:19:59,687 --> 00:20:02,806
- Don't you get it?
- When is later then?
262
00:20:02,940 --> 00:20:06,475
I don't know. I'm not boy lingual yet.
263
00:20:06,610 --> 00:20:10,394
But I tell you what.
I see a snog at the end of the tunnel.
264
00:20:12,324 --> 00:20:13,984
Big fish little fish cardboard box
265
00:20:14,118 --> 00:20:17,284
Big fish little fish cardboard box
Fill the trolley fill
266
00:20:17,413 --> 00:20:19,037
Lindsay, stop it.
You don't have to come.
267
00:20:19,164 --> 00:20:21,738
Oh, Robbie, stop.
I promise I won't get in the way.
268
00:20:21,876 --> 00:20:24,034
Oh, no. I don't mind, honestly.
269
00:20:24,169 --> 00:20:26,209
Come on.
Lindsay, stop messing about there.
270
00:20:26,338 --> 00:20:29,921
All right? Or you'll just have to
sit in the back then.
271
00:20:30,384 --> 00:20:31,759
Oh, Robbie.
272
00:20:39,059 --> 00:20:41,135
Maybe they're just mates.
273
00:20:42,188 --> 00:20:45,272
Don't be a plonker, El.
Mates don't hold hands.
274
00:20:46,442 --> 00:20:48,518
I already feel fed up with boys,
275
00:20:48,652 --> 00:20:51,986
and I haven't had anything
to do with them yet.
276
00:20:52,114 --> 00:20:54,154
I don't know how
she got in there before you.
277
00:20:54,283 --> 00:20:56,572
- I can never compete with Lindsay.
- Yes, you can.
278
00:20:56,702 --> 00:20:59,454
You've got
much better qualities than her.
279
00:20:59,580 --> 00:21:03,031
Yeah? Like what?
280
00:21:03,167 --> 00:21:07,663
- Well, you're really funny.
- Yeah.
281
00:21:07,796 --> 00:21:11,248
You were so hilarious
in that olive costume.
282
00:21:16,180 --> 00:21:20,889
But, Jas, you said
boys don't rate girls for funniness.
283
00:21:21,018 --> 00:21:24,850
Well, I just meant
that they rate other things more.
284
00:21:24,980 --> 00:21:28,065
Oh, yeah. What do they rate then?
285
00:21:28,192 --> 00:21:32,237
Skinny-Minnie blondie boobie girly girls
like Slaggy Lindsay?
286
00:21:33,572 --> 00:21:37,404
Well, she does have that cover-girl look
that boys die for.
287
00:21:40,913 --> 00:21:43,949
So, are you saying
I have to be more like her?
288
00:21:49,838 --> 00:21:51,297
- Thong alert!
- Shh!
289
00:21:51,423 --> 00:21:55,124
I always knew
she was from Vulgaria.
290
00:21:55,261 --> 00:21:59,389
- Now that's what boys like.
- But they just go up your bum.
291
00:21:59,515 --> 00:22:01,638
Nah.
- Do you think you should try one?
292
00:22:01,767 --> 00:22:06,228
No way. I'm not gonna injure myself
just because boys like it.
293
00:22:06,355 --> 00:22:08,680
And Slaggy Lindsay should know
that all those ancient women
294
00:22:08,816 --> 00:22:12,351
did not burn their bras and give women
the vote so she could wear a thong.
295
00:22:12,486 --> 00:22:13,482
Mmm-mmm!
296
00:22:18,450 --> 00:22:19,649
What a swiz!
297
00:22:19,785 --> 00:22:23,653
- That is just diabolical.
- No, that is shocking.
298
00:22:23,789 --> 00:22:27,490
Bet you Robbie
doesn't know about that.
299
00:22:27,626 --> 00:22:30,829
At least I sort of fill up my bra
when I wear one.
300
00:22:30,963 --> 00:22:33,715
Even though it does bunch up
when I run for the bus.
301
00:22:33,841 --> 00:22:38,254
So, she has false boobs,
a massive bum and a blank personality.
302
00:22:38,387 --> 00:22:40,925
You would score more
in all of those areas.
303
00:22:41,056 --> 00:22:42,681
Defo.
304
00:22:42,808 --> 00:22:46,758
But she's got Robbie
and I haven't even kissed a boy.
305
00:22:54,528 --> 00:22:56,106
I can't.
306
00:22:56,238 --> 00:22:58,361
You want to move up
on the maturity scale, right?
307
00:22:58,490 --> 00:23:00,448
I'm not that desperate.
308
00:23:00,576 --> 00:23:04,739
You have to step up to compete.
It's educational.
309
00:23:04,872 --> 00:23:07,908
You'll gain skills
Lindsay can only dream of.
310
00:23:25,434 --> 00:23:30,345
- Hi.
- Hi. Are you Peter Dyer?
311
00:23:30,523 --> 00:23:34,567
The man, the myth, the legend.
312
00:23:52,086 --> 00:23:54,541
- Your parents aren't here, are they?
- No.
313
00:23:54,672 --> 00:23:59,547
My hours are between 4:30 and 5:30
before they get back from work.
314
00:23:59,677 --> 00:24:02,084
Any musical requests?
315
00:24:02,221 --> 00:24:05,839
The right tune creates the right vibe.
Coldplay?
316
00:24:06,767 --> 00:24:11,228
50 Cent? Dido? Inner Relaxation Mix?
317
00:24:11,897 --> 00:24:15,562
Whatever. You choose.
318
00:24:21,949 --> 00:24:26,611
Now, what kind of experience
do you have?
319
00:24:26,745 --> 00:24:28,156
Oh, loads.
320
00:24:31,584 --> 00:24:34,288
You have to be completely honest
so I can evaluate you accurately.
321
00:24:34,420 --> 00:24:38,749
Okay, I guess I practise a lot
on the back of my hand.
322
00:24:38,883 --> 00:24:43,710
On average a person will have
over 25,000 snogs in their lifetime.
323
00:24:43,846 --> 00:24:47,511
So close your eyes,
relax, feel the magic.
324
00:24:47,641 --> 00:24:50,346
We're going to do a standard one first.
325
00:24:54,398 --> 00:24:57,103
Wow, you're a natural.
326
00:24:57,234 --> 00:25:00,520
- Really?
- Not too firm or toothy.
327
00:25:00,654 --> 00:25:03,489
- That's very common with beginners.
- Great.
328
00:25:04,325 --> 00:25:06,531
Next, movement.
329
00:25:06,660 --> 00:25:09,282
When I move my head in
you go the other way.
330
00:25:09,413 --> 00:25:12,414
The boy leads and the girl always fits in.
331
00:25:12,541 --> 00:25:18,330
- Where should I put my hands?
- The waist is safest.
332
00:25:25,012 --> 00:25:30,089
You're a quick learner. Now, tongues.
333
00:25:30,226 --> 00:25:32,349
They're a health and safety issue.
334
00:25:32,478 --> 00:25:37,721
The secret is to strike the right balance
between yielding and giving.
335
00:25:37,858 --> 00:25:41,061
Start slowly, like a turtle, not a lizard.
336
00:25:41,195 --> 00:25:43,733
Avoid washing machine syndrome.
337
00:26:10,558 --> 00:26:14,851
Sadly, this session's over.
My next client's here.
338
00:26:16,564 --> 00:26:19,434
- Hi, Georgia.
- Hi, El.
339
00:26:20,568 --> 00:26:23,438
Thank you, Georgia. I'll be in touch.
340
00:26:27,575 --> 00:26:31,157
You did tongues, didn't you?
Number six.
341
00:26:31,287 --> 00:26:34,038
You did a big fat tongue sandwich,
didn't you?
342
00:26:34,164 --> 00:26:39,503
Oh, my God.
All I know is, he was from Saliva City.
343
00:26:40,880 --> 00:26:44,331
But who cares?
I'm a snogging sensation.
344
00:26:58,063 --> 00:26:59,606
Wait!
345
00:27:00,024 --> 00:27:01,933
Mum? Dad?
346
00:27:02,484 --> 00:27:07,277
I just want you both to know how much I
really appreciate all you've done for me.
347
00:27:07,406 --> 00:27:10,027
I mean, it can't be easy since
you can hardly remember being my age
348
00:27:10,159 --> 00:27:11,701
'cause it was so long ago.
349
00:27:11,827 --> 00:27:14,365
Have you been inhaling fumes
from the science lab?
350
00:27:17,917 --> 00:27:19,660
I want to talk party details.
351
00:27:19,793 --> 00:27:23,209
Oh, Georgia. I told you I needed
to talk about something important.
352
00:27:23,339 --> 00:27:25,047
Oh, this is important!
353
00:27:25,174 --> 00:27:30,168
- Oh, all right! You go first.
- Can I invite boys?
354
00:27:30,304 --> 00:27:33,091
You haven't got some fancy fellow
we don't know about, have you?
355
00:27:33,224 --> 00:27:38,645
No. Honestly, Dad.
No one says "fella" any more.
356
00:27:38,771 --> 00:27:42,899
This isn't the Middle Ages, you know.
Or the '70s as you call it.
357
00:27:45,569 --> 00:27:49,234
Sorry, Dad. I must be hormonal.
358
00:27:50,866 --> 00:27:52,111
Can I have a D. J?
359
00:27:52,243 --> 00:27:55,078
Why would we pay for one when
we've already got one in the family?
360
00:27:55,204 --> 00:27:56,828
- What?
- Oh, yes.
361
00:27:56,956 --> 00:28:01,748
No way.
Oh, I want music from this century, Dad.
362
00:28:01,877 --> 00:28:04,202
If we hire a club,
we'll get a D.J. thrown in.
363
00:28:04,338 --> 00:28:06,461
We are not going to hire a club.
364
00:28:06,590 --> 00:28:09,081
I can get a very good rate
at the community hall.
365
00:28:09,218 --> 00:28:11,127
We've thrown
some legendary bashes there.
366
00:28:11,262 --> 00:28:13,883
We still know how to get down.
367
00:28:18,060 --> 00:28:21,643
Hey, wait, missy.
I haven't told you my news.
368
00:28:22,731 --> 00:28:27,856
Okay, just please stop snogging.
It's not normal.
369
00:28:27,987 --> 00:28:32,483
- I have been offered a promotion.
- Oh, cool.
370
00:28:32,616 --> 00:28:35,902
Maybe I can get a PDA
instead of a mobile now?
371
00:28:36,036 --> 00:28:41,375
Georgia, where in the world do you find
the most geomagnetic thermal activity?
372
00:28:42,042 --> 00:28:44,747
- I don't know, Dad.
- New Zealand.
373
00:28:46,338 --> 00:28:51,000
That's the slight catch.
The job's in New Zealand.
374
00:28:52,386 --> 00:28:54,177
- What?
- Look, I know it's a big deal
375
00:28:54,305 --> 00:28:56,677
and I don't have to decide anything yet.
376
00:28:56,807 --> 00:28:58,385
I really want to discuss it
with all the family.
377
00:28:58,517 --> 00:29:00,177
It's a bit of a shock for us all
378
00:29:00,311 --> 00:29:03,395
but your dad's not going to do
anything we're not happy with.
379
00:29:03,522 --> 00:29:08,861
Oh, Dad, you should totally go.
What an opportunity.
380
00:29:08,986 --> 00:29:12,735
Yes. One less parent
to deal with.
381
00:29:12,865 --> 00:29:16,316
If Dad goes to New Zealand
I can easily get around Mum
382
00:29:16,452 --> 00:29:18,859
and have my dream party.
383
00:29:18,996 --> 00:29:22,863
Now, I just need a plan to show Robbie
I'm a natural born snogger.
384
00:29:23,667 --> 00:29:28,329
So, I've figured out what I've got
that Slaggy Lindsay doesn't.
385
00:29:28,464 --> 00:29:30,789
Hair on the back of your legs?
386
00:29:30,925 --> 00:29:34,294
- The Angus advantage.
- What?
387
00:29:34,428 --> 00:29:39,007
Robbie loves cats and so do I. So,
when he finds out Angus is missing...
388
00:29:39,141 --> 00:29:42,475
- But Angus isn't missing.
- Don't be dim.
389
00:29:42,603 --> 00:29:47,561
We just pretend Angus is missing
so I get Robbie to help me find him.
390
00:29:47,691 --> 00:29:50,562
- He'll discover how unfake I am...
- Ah!
391
00:29:50,694 --> 00:29:54,692
...and then I'll try out my new natural
snogging technique and voilà!
392
00:29:54,823 --> 00:29:58,109
I've got my sex god.
Then we get you yours,
393
00:29:58,244 --> 00:30:03,202
and we're all set for my party.
The hottest, choicest party of the year.
394
00:30:05,417 --> 00:30:08,786
Okay. When you see Robbie
and I walk this way,
395
00:30:08,921 --> 00:30:14,081
you let Angus go
so Robbie can find him,
396
00:30:14,218 --> 00:30:18,927
resulting in high self esteem for him
and a celebration snogathon for me.
397
00:30:19,306 --> 00:30:22,343
Yeah, got it. Is that Tom?
398
00:30:23,143 --> 00:30:26,726
Oh, he has got a fit bum.
399
00:30:26,856 --> 00:30:30,059
Quality lushness!
Oh, I wish
400
00:30:30,192 --> 00:30:32,897
I could just go up and snog his face off.
401
00:30:33,028 --> 00:30:37,856
Honestly, Jas. Sometimes I think
you're half girl, half turnip.
402
00:30:37,992 --> 00:30:40,696
- Just focus on the plan.
- Oh, God, you're right.
403
00:30:46,292 --> 00:30:47,702
Have you done those
flower pots for me, son?
404
00:30:47,835 --> 00:30:49,662
Yes. Yes, Mum.
405
00:30:52,172 --> 00:30:55,423
Hiya.
- Oh, hi.
406
00:30:58,971 --> 00:31:01,758
Are you okay? What's wrong?
407
00:31:01,891 --> 00:31:05,425
It's my cat. He's lost.
408
00:31:07,855 --> 00:31:11,105
I don't know what happened.
He just disappeared.
409
00:31:12,943 --> 00:31:17,356
I'd go out and look with you
but I've got to help my mum in the shop.
410
00:31:18,574 --> 00:31:20,650
I'll put it in the window.
411
00:31:20,784 --> 00:31:24,948
Sure. Thanks, Robbie.
412
00:31:32,338 --> 00:31:33,962
Georgia!
413
00:31:36,467 --> 00:31:42,220
- If I lost Jubbly, I'd be really upset, too.
- Yeah, I'm pretty gutted.
414
00:31:44,099 --> 00:31:48,429
Ben, Ben, Ben! Get it, Ben, go!
415
00:31:53,817 --> 00:31:57,566
Trixie.
- Angus, stop!
416
00:32:00,157 --> 00:32:02,731
- Are you all right?
- Yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine.
417
00:32:02,868 --> 00:32:06,154
- Can you get the cat?
- No worries.
418
00:32:06,288 --> 00:32:08,080
Trixie, come back!
419
00:32:12,086 --> 00:32:13,331
Angus?
420
00:32:13,462 --> 00:32:18,705
Come on, you fluffy cat. Angus? Angus?
421
00:32:18,842 --> 00:32:22,176
So, are you glad
you moved to Eastbourne?
422
00:32:22,304 --> 00:32:25,056
Yeah. Have you always lived here?
423
00:32:25,182 --> 00:32:29,844
Yeah. It's called God's Waiting Room
'cause it's where people come to die.
424
00:32:31,355 --> 00:32:36,432
- I heard Eastbourne's the new Brighton.
- Don't be stupid.
425
00:32:38,445 --> 00:32:41,316
It's more peaceful here than London.
426
00:32:43,492 --> 00:32:46,529
I like to come to the beach.
Write songs.
427
00:32:47,454 --> 00:32:49,577
- About what?
- Angus?
428
00:32:51,083 --> 00:32:53,870
I don't know, life, the universe.
429
00:32:54,003 --> 00:32:57,206
- How reality TV is brainwashing us.
- Wow.
430
00:32:58,632 --> 00:33:01,206
Angus? Come on, you fluffy cat.
431
00:33:01,343 --> 00:33:03,550
So, what do the Stiff Dylans sound like?
432
00:33:03,679 --> 00:33:08,970
Well, actually we've got a lot of
influences, Radiohead, Pink Floyd.
433
00:33:09,101 --> 00:33:12,435
My dad listens to Pink Floyd
when he's been on the vino.
434
00:33:12,563 --> 00:33:17,189
- He knows all the words backwards.
- My dad plays air guitar really badly.
435
00:33:17,318 --> 00:33:19,891
- He thinks he's Hendrix.
- Does he make a wicked guitar face?
436
00:33:20,029 --> 00:33:23,694
Oh, not as wicked as me. I've taken the
uncool guitar face to a whole new level.
437
00:33:23,824 --> 00:33:25,733
Let's see one then.
438
00:33:47,932 --> 00:33:52,179
Thank you and good night, Eastbourne.
439
00:33:52,311 --> 00:33:54,884
- You've been a great crowd.
- Rock on! Whoo-hoo!
440
00:34:00,778 --> 00:34:04,440
I don't think Angus is here.
He likes the park, too.
441
00:34:06,867 --> 00:34:08,409
Okay, let's go.
442
00:34:18,504 --> 00:34:20,876
- So, is that your mum behind the till?
- Yeah.
443
00:34:21,006 --> 00:34:25,134
She's really pretty. Mine's mental.
444
00:34:25,261 --> 00:34:27,930
No, honestly, she's mad as a hatter.
445
00:34:28,931 --> 00:34:31,504
She's actually become
quite a regular customer.
446
00:34:31,642 --> 00:34:33,017
Oh, my God.
447
00:34:33,936 --> 00:34:36,853
Promise you won't take anything
she says about me seriously.
448
00:34:36,981 --> 00:34:38,605
That's no problem.
449
00:34:41,110 --> 00:34:43,815
So, does your dad work in the shop, too?
450
00:34:44,947 --> 00:34:47,153
No, he's in London.
451
00:34:48,576 --> 00:34:51,067
My parents just got divorced.
452
00:34:51,662 --> 00:34:55,991
- Oh, sorry.
- It's okay.
453
00:34:56,792 --> 00:35:00,161
That's why my mum opened the shop.
She's always wanted one.
454
00:35:00,296 --> 00:35:03,462
It's good that Tom and I can
keep an eye on her, you know?
455
00:35:07,469 --> 00:35:12,131
- What's wrong?
- Nothing, I thought I heard something.
456
00:35:12,892 --> 00:35:16,592
- Robbie!
- Look, Georgia, my brother's found him.
457
00:35:16,729 --> 00:35:17,843
Yeah.
458
00:35:18,606 --> 00:35:22,438
- Angus. Come here.
- Angus!
459
00:35:23,444 --> 00:35:25,602
- I'm sorry, Georgia.
- You messed it all up.
460
00:35:25,738 --> 00:35:26,734
- You were meant to be waiting...
- Over there.
461
00:35:26,864 --> 00:35:29,437
...by the fountain.
- I couldn't. That cat is mental.
462
00:35:29,575 --> 00:35:32,576
It's okay, it's all right. I'll get him.
463
00:35:32,995 --> 00:35:33,991
He went down there.
464
00:35:37,124 --> 00:35:38,287
Ouch.
465
00:35:40,586 --> 00:35:46,340
Angus, come here. Gotcha.
Come on, boy, it's okay.
466
00:35:47,009 --> 00:35:51,386
Good boy. Got you. I've got him.
467
00:35:52,806 --> 00:35:56,389
- Are you okay?
- Easy, Rob. He nearly broke Jas' arm.
468
00:35:56,519 --> 00:36:01,145
Yeah, where'd you find him, Jas?
Georgia said she's been looking all day.
469
00:36:02,024 --> 00:36:07,101
I found him in the park by the fountain.
470
00:36:07,238 --> 00:36:09,526
That's lucky.
That's where we were looking.
471
00:36:09,657 --> 00:36:14,200
Angus was raised by a family
of Scottish beavers. He loves water.
472
00:36:14,870 --> 00:36:16,578
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
473
00:36:18,666 --> 00:36:23,541
- Here we go.
- What were you doing? Thanks, Robbie.
474
00:36:24,421 --> 00:36:25,999
You saved him.
475
00:36:28,133 --> 00:36:32,262
Oh, Robbie. Lindsay called
and she's waiting for you on the pier.
476
00:36:33,305 --> 00:36:35,132
Right, I'd better go.
477
00:36:36,433 --> 00:36:40,597
Sure. No problem.
Thanks again for helping me.
478
00:36:40,729 --> 00:36:43,647
Yeah, yeah, it was fun. I'll see you later.
479
00:36:43,774 --> 00:36:45,149
All right, Jas.
480
00:36:45,276 --> 00:36:46,770
- Oh, yeah.
- See ya later then.
481
00:36:46,902 --> 00:36:48,610
Yeah, see ya later.
482
00:36:49,864 --> 00:36:54,525
- "See ya later. " Again.
- We were really hitting it off.
483
00:36:55,286 --> 00:36:58,121
- Jas?
- Yeah?
484
00:36:58,247 --> 00:37:02,576
- Do you wanna go out some time?
- With you?
485
00:37:02,710 --> 00:37:04,998
- Yeah, with me.
- Sure.
486
00:37:05,129 --> 00:37:08,379
- Great. Should I get your number then?
- Oh, yeah.
487
00:37:12,678 --> 00:37:14,671
When do you think he'll really call?
488
00:37:14,805 --> 00:37:16,881
Do you think I should have
taken his number, too?
489
00:37:17,016 --> 00:37:18,510
Or would that have
just looked desperate?
490
00:37:18,642 --> 00:37:23,351
Jas, it was perfect.
You did everything right.
491
00:37:24,315 --> 00:37:28,312
But he's from a broken home.
You have to be extra mature.
492
00:37:28,444 --> 00:37:32,655
Totally. When he calls will you help me
pick an outfit for the date?
493
00:37:32,781 --> 00:37:34,026
Love to.
494
00:37:35,618 --> 00:37:37,741
Good job, Angus.
495
00:37:48,088 --> 00:37:49,251
family!
But the month,
496
00:37:49,381 --> 00:37:51,208
I'm gonna have to be
on my own with the kids,
497
00:37:51,342 --> 00:37:52,966
- dealing with everything!
Yes, but I've got to go!
498
00:37:53,093 --> 00:37:55,845
We can't just turn up with nothing
set up. I have to go and set it up!
499
00:37:55,971 --> 00:37:57,134
I know, but I'm just trying
to tell you...
500
00:37:57,264 --> 00:37:59,755
Then you can come join me
and we'll have a better quality of life.
501
00:37:59,892 --> 00:38:00,888
It'll be fantastic for all of us!
502
00:38:01,018 --> 00:38:02,014
Come on.
Listen to me, please.
503
00:38:02,144 --> 00:38:04,979
- I'm just saying it's upsetting to me...
- 'Cause I never listen, that's right.
504
00:38:05,105 --> 00:38:08,806
Oh, my God!
- I never listen to you, do I?
505
00:38:13,280 --> 00:38:15,606
Your dad is just impossible.
506
00:38:15,741 --> 00:38:19,027
Georgia? Can you come up here
for a minute, please?
507
00:38:26,502 --> 00:38:28,210
Hi, sweetheart. Can you
give me a hand with this packing?
508
00:38:28,337 --> 00:38:31,373
'Cause your mum is
making a right mess of it.
509
00:38:33,759 --> 00:38:38,006
Dad, why do you need
four pairs of brown trousers?
510
00:38:38,138 --> 00:38:40,926
- 'Cause they go with everything.
- They do not.
511
00:38:41,058 --> 00:38:43,810
Hey, I'm not going on a fashion shoot.
512
00:38:45,896 --> 00:38:48,019
Hey, what is it, munchkin?
513
00:38:49,400 --> 00:38:53,777
Dad, I don't like it
when you and Mum fight.
514
00:38:57,241 --> 00:39:01,108
Promise me you won't hang out
with any Kiwi women while you're away.
515
00:39:01,245 --> 00:39:02,988
Not even ugly ones.
516
00:39:03,831 --> 00:39:04,827
Oh...
517
00:39:05,708 --> 00:39:08,281
What are you talking about, Georgia?
518
00:39:10,504 --> 00:39:13,458
Hey, this is a big change for us all.
519
00:39:15,259 --> 00:39:18,675
I'm not going out there
to be "living La Vida Loca. "
520
00:39:19,930 --> 00:39:22,219
Though I'm glad you still think
your dad's a handsome old devil,
521
00:39:22,349 --> 00:39:25,137
even if he does belong
in the Stone Age.
522
00:39:27,313 --> 00:39:31,262
Come on, then. How many pairs
of brown trousers do I need?
523
00:39:31,400 --> 00:39:32,942
- Two.
- Two.
524
00:39:33,068 --> 00:39:37,398
- Georgia? It's a boy. Result!
- What boy?
525
00:39:37,531 --> 00:39:42,323
- Mr Peter Dyer.
- Oh, no. Saliva Boy.
526
00:39:42,494 --> 00:39:45,068
What? He sounds keen to talk to you.
527
00:39:47,833 --> 00:39:48,829
Georgia!
528
00:39:49,752 --> 00:39:51,210
Georgia?
529
00:39:51,337 --> 00:39:53,128
- Goodbye, love.
- Goodbye.
530
00:39:53,255 --> 00:39:57,383
Kiss for Daddy? Bye, Libby.
531
00:39:58,844 --> 00:40:01,881
Oh, my little elf.
532
00:40:02,014 --> 00:40:05,383
- Oh, my love, you've got conjunctivitis.
- Relax.
533
00:40:05,518 --> 00:40:09,349
I'm sad you're going and all that,
Dad, but it's only Vaseline.
534
00:40:09,480 --> 00:40:12,979
- What?
- Makes your eyelashes longer.
535
00:40:13,108 --> 00:40:17,272
Oh, Georgia, I wish you'd stop messing
about with yourself for one minute.
536
00:40:17,404 --> 00:40:20,358
- You're beautiful.
- No, I'm not.
537
00:40:20,491 --> 00:40:23,824
You have to say that. You're my dad.
538
00:40:23,953 --> 00:40:27,653
Okay, you guys, I'm gonna ring you
as soon as I get there. All right?
539
00:40:27,790 --> 00:40:32,203
Oh, and Georgie, darling, one last thing.
Stay off the bleeding phone.
540
00:40:33,379 --> 00:40:37,423
- Bob, have you got your flight socks?
- In the back. Bye.
541
00:40:40,469 --> 00:40:44,514
Georgia. He called.
542
00:40:44,682 --> 00:40:46,342
- Already?
- Twice.
543
00:40:47,601 --> 00:40:52,844
I'm having a major nervy B.
Zitney Spears or what?
544
00:40:52,982 --> 00:40:57,727
The ice is bringing it down, though.
But I don't know if I should wear a bra.
545
00:40:58,863 --> 00:41:01,484
You're not planning
on getting to level seven already?
546
00:41:01,615 --> 00:41:05,399
Duh. I'm not a scrubber.
I just don't know if I need to wear a bra
547
00:41:05,536 --> 00:41:07,160
to make me look more mature,
548
00:41:07,288 --> 00:41:11,285
or if it'll just go bunchy under my top
and make me look fatter.
549
00:41:11,417 --> 00:41:14,750
- Pencil test.
- You do it, too.
550
00:41:19,758 --> 00:41:22,000
Crap. So no bra tonight.
551
00:41:22,136 --> 00:41:25,220
God, mine's staying up for the first time.
552
00:41:25,347 --> 00:41:29,808
- You're lucky. You're so voluptuous.
- Are you saying I'm fat?
553
00:41:29,935 --> 00:41:33,803
No, you've got
just the right amount of breastiness.
554
00:41:33,939 --> 00:41:37,391
Sadly, my mum can get
a whole pencil case up there.
555
00:41:38,569 --> 00:41:40,396
I don't want them to get too big.
556
00:41:40,529 --> 00:41:43,863
Otherwise I'll end up with backbreakers
like my mum or the Queen.
557
00:41:43,991 --> 00:41:47,111
- The Queen hasn't got big bazoomas.
- Yes, she has.
558
00:41:47,244 --> 00:41:49,818
She has a special bra that
pushes them under her armpits
559
00:41:49,955 --> 00:41:53,490
so she doesn't look common
or unroyal with a 44 DD.
560
00:41:56,295 --> 00:41:59,628
Jas, do you think, maybe,
you could tell Tom
561
00:41:59,757 --> 00:42:02,841
how much better I am for Robbie
than Slaggy Lindsay?
562
00:42:02,968 --> 00:42:07,464
- Of course. Oh, how's my spot?
- Ugh! Do you want me to squeeze it?
563
00:42:07,598 --> 00:42:09,057
- Yeah.
- Okay.
564
00:42:17,525 --> 00:42:20,276
- Hello.
Georgia, it's a builder I called.
565
00:42:20,402 --> 00:42:23,439
I'm just getting dressed.
Make him a cup of tea.
566
00:42:23,572 --> 00:42:26,573
What a pretty bride
in your lucky dress.
567
00:42:26,700 --> 00:42:28,159
Mum, will you hurry up?
568
00:42:28,285 --> 00:42:30,657
- I've got to go meet Jas!
there you are. There.
569
00:42:30,788 --> 00:42:32,662
- Here comes the bride.
- Libby,
570
00:42:32,790 --> 00:42:34,498
will you stop dressing Angus
up in drag?
571
00:42:34,625 --> 00:42:35,621
All dressed in white.
572
00:42:35,751 --> 00:42:38,954
Slips off banana skins
and dressing on the side.
573
00:42:39,088 --> 00:42:40,796
You'll soon discover this is a madhouse.
574
00:42:40,923 --> 00:42:42,916
Are you okay, Angus?
575
00:42:45,719 --> 00:42:47,759
- You look lovely, Angus.
- Tea?
576
00:42:47,888 --> 00:42:51,637
- Yes, please.
What a beautiful bride.
577
00:42:51,767 --> 00:42:55,931
Georgia, I'm thinking about
getting the living room redone but...
578
00:42:57,481 --> 00:42:59,688
What a lovely dress!
That's a great dress.
579
00:42:59,817 --> 00:43:03,482
But don't tell your dad.
It's a secret for when he gets back.
580
00:43:03,612 --> 00:43:04,608
Huh?
581
00:43:04,738 --> 00:43:05,734
What a pretty bride!
582
00:43:05,865 --> 00:43:06,860
I know he looks
like George Clooney...
583
00:43:06,991 --> 00:43:08,105
- I'm Connie.
- Jem. Nice to meet you, Connie.
584
00:43:08,242 --> 00:43:10,033
who's ancient
but still a fittie.
585
00:43:10,160 --> 00:43:11,785
Oh, yeah. Yeah, good.
586
00:43:11,912 --> 00:43:14,237
But he'd never fancy her
in a million years
587
00:43:14,373 --> 00:43:16,829
- and in that top?
- Shall we?
588
00:43:16,959 --> 00:43:18,537
- Yeah.
- Please.
589
00:43:19,128 --> 00:43:22,378
Tom's lips are so soft.
590
00:43:22,506 --> 00:43:24,131
Did you tell him
to tell Robbie about me?
591
00:43:24,258 --> 00:43:26,416
I dreamt about Tom all night.
592
00:43:26,552 --> 00:43:30,846
Earth to Jas.
Did you talk about me and Robbie?
593
00:43:30,973 --> 00:43:33,298
Oh, sorry, I forgot.
594
00:43:34,226 --> 00:43:36,018
Thanks.
595
00:43:36,145 --> 00:43:38,814
Wait a minute. Tom did say something.
596
00:43:38,939 --> 00:43:42,688
He said Robbie thought Lindsay
was a bit clingy sometimes.
597
00:43:44,028 --> 00:43:48,820
Tom smells so nice,
not fromagey like most boys.
598
00:43:48,949 --> 00:43:50,028
Great.
599
00:43:50,159 --> 00:43:53,076
So, what exactly did he mean
about Lindsay being clingy?
600
00:43:53,204 --> 00:43:56,039
You know, Tom wants to go into
the fruit and veg business.
601
00:43:56,165 --> 00:43:57,873
He says the future's organic.
602
00:43:58,000 --> 00:44:00,538
That's fascinating,
but what about me and Robbie?
603
00:44:00,669 --> 00:44:02,329
Hello, gorgeous.
604
00:44:14,683 --> 00:44:15,679
Uh...
605
00:44:16,477 --> 00:44:19,644
Excuse me? Jas?
606
00:44:24,318 --> 00:44:26,987
Washing machine syndrome or what?
607
00:44:42,461 --> 00:44:44,620
- Jas?
- Okay.
608
00:44:45,965 --> 00:44:47,589
- Jas?
- Jas?
609
00:45:20,416 --> 00:45:24,627
- She's being really shallow.
- Hi.
610
00:45:24,753 --> 00:45:28,917
- Hi. Mrs Unavailable.
- What?
611
00:45:29,049 --> 00:45:31,754
We all think you've really changed
since you've got a man in your life.
612
00:45:31,886 --> 00:45:33,546
Oh, come on, G.
613
00:45:41,645 --> 00:45:45,809
A thong?
Have you bought your ticket yet?
614
00:45:45,941 --> 00:45:48,895
- What?
- To Vulgaria, with your new best mate.
615
00:45:49,028 --> 00:45:53,690
Why are you being so stroppy?
You'll always be my best mate.
616
00:45:53,824 --> 00:45:56,695
Just think of it like me going
undercover and spying on her.
617
00:45:56,827 --> 00:46:00,243
All right.
Now you're thinking like a best friend.
618
00:46:00,372 --> 00:46:03,160
- I taught you well.
Hurry up, girls.
619
00:46:04,376 --> 00:46:06,120
Let's get physical.
620
00:46:18,974 --> 00:46:21,382
What are you waving at, minger?
621
00:46:24,396 --> 00:46:27,600
Listen, short arse,
keep away from my man.
622
00:46:27,733 --> 00:46:30,485
He's not a cradle snatcher,
and you're not woman enough for him.
623
00:46:30,611 --> 00:46:34,609
- So back off!
- I wasn't waving at anybody.
624
00:46:39,286 --> 00:46:42,620
Talk to each other, ladies.
Look, she's wide open over here.
625
00:46:42,748 --> 00:46:44,622
Pass the ball.
626
00:46:45,918 --> 00:46:47,911
- Go on, Georgia, go on.
- Run, Georgia.
627
00:46:49,713 --> 00:46:52,667
Oh, the cow.
I can't believe she did that.
628
00:46:54,301 --> 00:46:56,175
That Lindsay was well out of order.
629
00:46:56,303 --> 00:46:58,296
She's a full-on bully.
630
00:46:58,430 --> 00:47:01,004
- Robbie mentioned you at lunch.
- Really?
631
00:47:01,141 --> 00:47:03,051
He said he was happy you found Angus.
632
00:47:03,185 --> 00:47:04,893
Oh! How sweet.
633
00:47:05,020 --> 00:47:08,057
He just has to get to know you
and see how brill you are.
634
00:47:08,190 --> 00:47:11,227
Kirsty Walsh in upper fifth's having
a party for her sixteenth tonight.
635
00:47:11,360 --> 00:47:13,768
- I got you all invited.
- Oh, wicked.
636
00:47:13,904 --> 00:47:17,024
This is your chance
to impress Robbie yourself.
637
00:47:17,950 --> 00:47:22,742
Oh, there's Tom. I'll see you later, gang.
638
00:47:24,540 --> 00:47:27,113
- How are you?
- I'm fine, how are you?
639
00:47:27,251 --> 00:47:29,244
Quick, Georgia, hide.
640
00:47:34,466 --> 00:47:38,250
And did you see my second goal?
Right? It was spectacular.
641
00:47:38,971 --> 00:47:40,845
I saw you floor Georgia.
642
00:47:40,973 --> 00:47:43,678
Well, why do you care about her
all of a sudden?
643
00:47:43,809 --> 00:47:45,885
- It was a cheap shot.
- Okay, coach.
644
00:47:46,020 --> 00:47:49,887
You can give me a spanking
and I'll never do it again.
645
00:47:51,400 --> 00:47:53,108
- Did you see that?
- Absolutely.
646
00:47:53,235 --> 00:47:56,438
- How could you not?
- She moved in for full-frontal snogging,
647
00:47:56,572 --> 00:47:58,980
but he converted it to lips-to-cheek.
648
00:47:59,116 --> 00:48:01,192
Which proves
he didn't want to snog her, right?
649
00:48:01,327 --> 00:48:02,951
- So right.
- Georgia?
650
00:48:04,246 --> 00:48:05,990
What are you doing?
651
00:48:08,083 --> 00:48:12,829
- Ellen lost an earring.
- She's wearing her earrings.
652
00:48:16,425 --> 00:48:18,382
It was another one.
653
00:48:20,471 --> 00:48:22,713
One she wasn't wearing.
654
00:48:28,229 --> 00:48:30,186
- You're nuts.
- Hey.
655
00:48:30,314 --> 00:48:33,101
- See you later.
- Oh, wait, Robbie.
656
00:48:33,234 --> 00:48:38,441
I really think I owe Georgia an apology.
I'm really sorry I tripped you.
657
00:48:38,572 --> 00:48:41,146
You were playing absolutely brilliantly.
658
00:48:41,283 --> 00:48:45,447
- You should go up for the school team.
- Wow, Linds, that's really cool.
659
00:48:45,579 --> 00:48:48,450
Yeah, she's right, you should, Georgia.
660
00:48:57,466 --> 00:49:01,049
- Is my moustache showing?
- What moustache?
661
00:49:01,178 --> 00:49:04,381
Well, my mum gave me this cream
to get rid of it.
662
00:49:04,515 --> 00:49:07,682
You're so lucky
you don't have dark hair like me.
663
00:49:07,810 --> 00:49:09,470
I know.
664
00:49:09,603 --> 00:49:14,312
- But I do have to shave my armpits now.
- Well, my mum's got sideburns.
665
00:49:20,406 --> 00:49:24,273
- Do you think we're sad, Georgia?
- Why?
666
00:49:24,410 --> 00:49:27,826
Because we're the only two left
without boyfriends?
667
00:49:33,252 --> 00:49:38,543
Oh, come on in, Mum.
The door's only closed for my privacy.
668
00:49:38,674 --> 00:49:42,209
Don't be silly.
You're the fruit of my womb.
669
00:49:42,344 --> 00:49:44,551
I've seen all your bits and pieces.
670
00:49:44,680 --> 00:49:49,389
Connie, paella's ready.
- Oh, Jem is such a great cook.
671
00:49:49,518 --> 00:49:52,555
He could teach your dad
a thing or two, that's for sure.
672
00:49:52,688 --> 00:49:55,013
Now, I need you
to baby-sit Libby this weekend
673
00:49:55,149 --> 00:49:58,600
because I'm taking Jem
to my salsa class Saturday.
674
00:49:58,736 --> 00:49:59,732
Why?
675
00:49:59,862 --> 00:50:03,313
Because he's really passionate about it.
He's been dancing for years.
676
00:50:03,449 --> 00:50:06,200
- But Dad loves to dance.
- Yeah.
677
00:50:06,327 --> 00:50:08,900
Like Mick Jagger with two left feet.
678
00:50:10,122 --> 00:50:15,247
Honestly, Mum. Have a bit of dignity.
You could put a hip out at your age.
679
00:50:15,377 --> 00:50:20,253
Whatevers. Your mum's well wicked,
you minger.
680
00:50:22,760 --> 00:50:24,005
Minger.
681
00:50:40,444 --> 00:50:42,733
Wonder why he's not here yet.
682
00:50:49,578 --> 00:50:51,370
Hi.
683
00:50:51,497 --> 00:50:54,948
Come, fiasco scale 9.9 approaching.
684
00:51:32,788 --> 00:51:37,082
- Peter, what are you doing?
- You never called me back.
685
00:51:37,209 --> 00:51:40,744
Sorry, I've been really busy studying.
686
00:51:40,880 --> 00:51:44,046
Listen, I'm really into you.
I have to kiss you.
687
00:51:46,051 --> 00:51:47,249
Peter!
688
00:51:47,386 --> 00:51:49,260
Peter!
689
00:51:53,934 --> 00:51:55,974
Oh, my God!
690
00:51:56,103 --> 00:52:00,432
Look at the slag's knickers.
It's like something my gran would wear.
691
00:52:08,073 --> 00:52:09,188
What?
692
00:52:11,535 --> 00:52:14,322
You have to tell Robbie
that Peter's not my boyfriend.
693
00:52:14,455 --> 00:52:16,115
That's not what it looked like.
694
00:52:16,248 --> 00:52:17,908
You had your skirt up
around your bazoomas,
695
00:52:18,042 --> 00:52:21,292
- with your knickers on full display.
- It was awful.
696
00:52:21,462 --> 00:52:23,834
Why couldn't I have just banged my
head and gone into a coma
697
00:52:23,964 --> 00:52:25,340
and died right there?
698
00:52:25,466 --> 00:52:27,375
Why couldn't you have
worn smaller knickers?
699
00:52:27,509 --> 00:52:30,594
Jas, this is serious!
700
00:52:30,721 --> 00:52:34,885
I have to get Robbie alone,
away from that minging Lindsay.
701
00:52:35,017 --> 00:52:38,884
You know, Tom told me he and Robbie
are going to the pool this afternoon,
702
00:52:39,021 --> 00:52:44,016
- but Lindsay isn't going.
- Why didn't you tell me this before?
703
00:52:44,151 --> 00:52:48,445
Honestly! Your best mate is banished
into the Valley of Humiliation
704
00:52:48,572 --> 00:52:53,697
and you're withholding vital info.
Why isn't Lindsay going anyway?
705
00:52:53,827 --> 00:52:57,113
She doesn't like
getting chlorine in her hair.
706
00:52:57,248 --> 00:53:00,699
And she's checking out party venues.
707
00:53:00,834 --> 00:53:04,784
Oh, no.
Her birthday's the same time as mine.
708
00:53:04,922 --> 00:53:09,418
I don't want Lindsay to get the best club.
And I bet she's getting a killer D.J.
709
00:53:09,552 --> 00:53:12,506
Well, her mum knows
Fatboy Slim's neighbour.
710
00:53:14,139 --> 00:53:15,883
You have to come to the pool with me.
711
00:53:16,016 --> 00:53:19,468
But I hate swimming.
It makes my hair go all frizzy.
712
00:53:19,603 --> 00:53:24,146
Please, Jas.
I have to talk to Robbie or I'll just die.
713
00:53:32,783 --> 00:53:34,361
Hi, Georgia!
714
00:53:34,493 --> 00:53:37,613
- What a surprise to see you here!
- Yeah.
715
00:53:37,746 --> 00:53:40,913
- I bring my little sister all the time.
- Why don't you go and change?
716
00:53:41,041 --> 00:53:43,711
Jas, I need to speak with you urgently.
717
00:53:43,836 --> 00:53:46,623
My life is a fiasco and a sham.
718
00:53:46,755 --> 00:53:50,753
My mum's dumped Libby on me, so
she can go salsa with George Clooney.
719
00:53:50,885 --> 00:53:54,135
We're practically orphans
since my dad left
720
00:53:54,263 --> 00:53:56,968
but now I've got even bigger problems.
721
00:53:58,684 --> 00:53:59,882
Oh, my God!
722
00:54:00,019 --> 00:54:03,352
It'll be fine.
Just jump in when he's not looking.
723
00:54:07,443 --> 00:54:13,196
Libby, this is Robbie.
Libby, stop licking Robbie.
724
00:54:13,324 --> 00:54:14,522
She thinks she's part cat.
725
00:54:15,784 --> 00:54:18,869
Come on, Libby,
let's go for a swim with Tom.
726
00:54:19,580 --> 00:54:22,035
Are you coming
in the water, too, Jas?
727
00:54:22,166 --> 00:54:23,577
Yeah.
728
00:54:27,421 --> 00:54:29,912
Well, you coming in then, or what?
729
00:54:42,228 --> 00:54:44,351
Robbie, about last night...
730
00:54:44,480 --> 00:54:49,723
It's cool. I mean, Peter Dyer's got a rep
as a bit of a ladies' man.
731
00:54:49,860 --> 00:54:51,983
But I'm not going out with him.
732
00:54:52,112 --> 00:54:55,647
- Does he know that?
- Yes, totally.
733
00:54:55,783 --> 00:54:58,488
It wasn't at all what it looked like.
734
00:55:00,120 --> 00:55:01,864
Well, that's good.
735
00:55:10,923 --> 00:55:13,295
All right, all right, all right.
736
00:55:15,302 --> 00:55:18,920
Okay, let's do handstands.
737
00:55:19,098 --> 00:55:21,423
- I'm really good at this.
- Okay, you're on.
738
00:55:21,559 --> 00:55:22,969
- Okay?
- Yeah.
739
00:55:35,072 --> 00:55:37,230
- So, how was it?
- Great.
740
00:55:37,366 --> 00:55:41,364
- I told you I was good.
- Georgia, why are your legs orange?
741
00:55:41,495 --> 00:55:47,331
Oh, my God.
I'm such a sad excuse for a girl.
742
00:55:47,459 --> 00:55:50,959
I thought my legs were too pale,
so I used this stupid Kool-tan cream.
743
00:55:51,088 --> 00:55:52,499
Don't, stop.
744
00:55:55,509 --> 00:55:57,632
Please don't look at them.
745
00:55:59,013 --> 00:56:02,263
They're like giant cheesy puffs.
746
00:56:37,468 --> 00:56:41,548
I'd better go. I've got
to sort some things out. I'll call you.
747
00:56:49,813 --> 00:56:51,936
- He kissed you?
- Result.
748
00:56:52,066 --> 00:56:55,731
- Oh, my God.
- It was magic.
749
00:56:55,861 --> 00:56:58,269
Way beyond all the stuff
you're supposed to have.
750
00:56:58,405 --> 00:57:00,778
- Fireworks whooshing and stuff.
- I get that with Tom.
751
00:57:00,908 --> 00:57:03,944
And his lips were the perfect moisture.
752
00:57:04,078 --> 00:57:05,536
Nothing like Saliva Boy.
753
00:57:05,663 --> 00:57:09,032
And he did that varying pressure
Rosie says foreign boys do,
754
00:57:09,166 --> 00:57:12,333
and then said,
"I have to sort some things out. "
755
00:57:12,461 --> 00:57:15,747
- What?
- I know. What does that mean?
756
00:57:15,881 --> 00:57:18,503
- It could be anything.
- When do you think he'll call?
757
00:57:18,634 --> 00:57:21,255
Tom called me the same day
he said he'd call me.
758
00:57:21,387 --> 00:57:25,087
- It will probably be any minute then.
- I'm so happy for you, G.
759
00:57:25,224 --> 00:57:28,924
So, let's step up the party plans.
We've got so much to sort out.
760
00:57:29,061 --> 00:57:31,848
Venue, fashion statements,
colour scheme.
761
00:57:31,981 --> 00:57:34,935
- You should do black and white.
- Marvy.
762
00:57:35,067 --> 00:57:37,772
G, Tom's texting. I've got to go. Bye.
763
00:57:43,576 --> 00:57:44,690
Hello?
764
00:57:44,827 --> 00:57:47,863
- Georgia?
- Oh. Hi, Dad.
765
00:57:47,997 --> 00:57:50,488
Have you been on the phone? I've been
trying to get through for an hour.
766
00:57:50,624 --> 00:57:53,162
How many times have I told you
not to run up the phone bill?
767
00:57:53,294 --> 00:57:58,169
Nice to hear your voice, too, Dad.
Mum! Dad's on the phone.
768
00:57:58,716 --> 00:58:00,091
Hi, I've been waiting for your call.
769
00:58:00,217 --> 00:58:02,755
Yeah, I've been trying
to get through for ages, but Georgia's...
770
00:58:02,887 --> 00:58:05,378
- Okay, Dad. End of...
- Hold on.
771
00:58:05,514 --> 00:58:07,970
I've got exciting news.
772
00:58:08,100 --> 00:58:12,180
Connie, Georgia, I really want you
to join me in New Zealand.
773
00:58:12,313 --> 00:58:13,771
- What?
- It's fantastic here
774
00:58:13,898 --> 00:58:15,522
and they love my ideas
for the new division.
775
00:58:15,649 --> 00:58:17,318
They want me to run it.
It's a big promotion.
776
00:58:17,610 --> 00:58:20,943
- Wow.
- Are you mad? I can't go now.
777
00:58:21,071 --> 00:58:23,609
- I'm just starting to get a life.
- Georgia, don't be selfish.
778
00:58:23,741 --> 00:58:28,403
I'm not. It's just, I'd be bored to death
by sheep and hobbits.
779
00:58:28,537 --> 00:58:29,948
- We can't go.
- Look, Georgia.
780
00:58:30,080 --> 00:58:32,951
Can we talk about this later?
This is costing me a pound a minute.
781
00:58:33,083 --> 00:58:34,827
Can I speak to your mum
alone for a second?
782
00:58:34,960 --> 00:58:37,498
Okay. Please don't be long.
783
00:58:37,630 --> 00:58:40,547
I'm expecting
a very important phone call.
784
00:58:45,596 --> 00:58:46,841
Robbie.
785
00:58:49,266 --> 00:58:50,262
Oh...
786
00:58:50,434 --> 00:58:51,845
- Hey, babe.
- Hi.
787
00:58:51,977 --> 00:58:55,892
Not again, Peter.
I'm still recovering from my injuries.
788
00:58:56,023 --> 00:58:58,146
I'm sorry if I pushed
you too far at the party.
789
00:58:58,275 --> 00:59:00,268
You just drive me crazy.
790
00:59:01,403 --> 00:59:08,153
- Peter, I can't go out with you. I'm sorry.
- Why? You're my top student ever.
791
00:59:09,370 --> 00:59:10,780
I may be moving away.
792
00:59:10,913 --> 00:59:13,285
Okay, we'll just enjoy
each moment till then.
793
00:59:13,415 --> 00:59:17,164
Look, I can't go out with you because...
794
00:59:18,462 --> 00:59:19,873
Because...
795
00:59:21,340 --> 00:59:23,249
Because I'm a lesbian.
796
01:00:48,886 --> 01:00:54,640
Jas, who does level five snogging
then doesn't have the decency to call?
797
01:00:54,767 --> 01:00:56,475
A boy who can't make up his mind?
798
01:00:56,602 --> 01:00:59,888
But he said he was glad
I wasn't going out with Peter.
799
01:01:00,022 --> 01:01:02,727
And then he gave me a real kiss.
800
01:01:02,858 --> 01:01:05,147
I really felt something deep
in the pit of my stomach.
801
01:01:05,277 --> 01:01:08,278
For goodness sake, Georgia,
stop yapping and go to bed.
802
01:01:08,405 --> 01:01:10,197
It's a school night.
803
01:01:10,908 --> 01:01:12,947
Well, at least you know
he doesn't think you're a lesbian.
804
01:01:13,077 --> 01:01:16,493
But he could have told me
about his gig in Brighton.
805
01:01:17,748 --> 01:01:20,951
- G?
- What now?
806
01:01:21,085 --> 01:01:25,996
Lindsay. She's moved her party
to the same date as yours.
807
01:01:26,131 --> 01:01:28,967
How did she know that was
the day of my party, anyway?
808
01:01:29,093 --> 01:01:31,928
She saw my designs
for your party invite.
809
01:01:32,054 --> 01:01:34,296
- What?
- Well, I was showing Tom
810
01:01:34,431 --> 01:01:35,712
and she grabbed them.
811
01:01:35,850 --> 01:01:38,091
Tom said they looked really artistic.
812
01:01:38,227 --> 01:01:42,474
Jas. What am I going to do now?
813
01:01:42,606 --> 01:01:46,556
No one's going to come to my loser
party if it's on the same night as hers.
814
01:01:46,694 --> 01:01:51,356
Georgia! You have to get enough sleep
or your brain won't function.
815
01:01:51,490 --> 01:01:53,649
It's a wonder you girls have
anything left to talk about.
816
01:01:53,784 --> 01:01:58,161
Mum, we're having a crisis
and you're not helping.
817
01:01:58,289 --> 01:02:00,577
You won't let me have
a cool party in a club,
818
01:02:00,708 --> 01:02:03,827
and now everyone's going
to laugh at me for being so lame,
819
01:02:03,961 --> 01:02:05,918
and no decent boys
will ever want to know me
820
01:02:06,046 --> 01:02:10,340
because I'm the naff girl who had
the sad party that no one went to.
821
01:02:10,509 --> 01:02:13,759
- Georgia.
- Okay, good night, Mrs Nicolson.
822
01:02:13,888 --> 01:02:15,430
Jas, spill it.
823
01:02:22,319 --> 01:02:24,857
Georgie, darling.
824
01:02:26,531 --> 01:02:27,907
Come here.
825
01:02:34,957 --> 01:02:37,827
I know what you're feeling like, honey.
826
01:02:37,960 --> 01:02:42,420
It's awful when you like someone
that can't see how brilliant you are.
827
01:02:43,340 --> 01:02:50,054
- Mum, what exactly has Jas told you?
- She didn't say any more than that.
828
01:02:50,180 --> 01:02:54,925
And, honey, it's your business. You can
talk to me if and whenever you want.
829
01:02:57,854 --> 01:03:02,813
You're such a clever, bright girl,
Georgia. Remember that.
830
01:03:03,902 --> 01:03:05,396
And please,
831
01:03:06,947 --> 01:03:08,774
have a look at this.
832
01:03:11,702 --> 01:03:17,407
Mum, I really don't need to learn
about astronomy right now.
833
01:03:17,541 --> 01:03:20,246
No, honey, this is a very special book
834
01:03:20,377 --> 01:03:24,375
that will open your mind to the
curious way of the male species.
835
01:03:24,506 --> 01:03:29,797
See? I already knew
boys were from a different planet.
836
01:03:29,928 --> 01:03:33,131
They're infuriating.
They say one thing and mean another.
837
01:03:33,265 --> 01:03:34,510
Exactly.
838
01:03:34,641 --> 01:03:38,473
And they act like they like you
and then they just ignore you.
839
01:03:38,604 --> 01:03:42,850
Then out of the blue, they decide
they want to move to New Zealand.
840
01:03:44,610 --> 01:03:49,604
And don't worry too much.
I'm still trying to figure them out.
841
01:03:50,157 --> 01:03:52,280
Okay, poppet? Yeah?
842
01:04:28,820 --> 01:04:30,065
Come on.
843
01:04:30,197 --> 01:04:33,317
Jem, sweetie, can you
come here? I need a hand.
844
01:04:37,496 --> 01:04:40,699
Oh! Hi, girls. I didn't see you there.
845
01:04:42,334 --> 01:04:46,332
Put your tongues away, you slappers.
I need to discuss a plan.
846
01:04:50,676 --> 01:04:52,633
Can you open this for me, love?
I can never get it right.
847
01:04:52,761 --> 01:04:54,469
Bottle of red?
848
01:05:06,441 --> 01:05:08,849
- Mum!
- What?
849
01:05:16,785 --> 01:05:22,455
I'm getting really worried. I mean, how
long can it take to decorate one room?
850
01:05:24,126 --> 01:05:27,080
If I could just show you...
- Libby called him Daddy the other day.
851
01:05:27,212 --> 01:05:29,418
When's your dad coming back?
852
01:05:30,424 --> 01:05:32,500
He wants to take
the job in New Zealand.
853
01:05:32,634 --> 01:05:35,042
What? So you're going to move there?
854
01:05:35,178 --> 01:05:38,298
No way.
My mum doesn't want to go, either.
855
01:05:38,432 --> 01:05:40,887
And I can't go now,
given the Robbie situation.
856
01:05:41,018 --> 01:05:42,678
- Good.
- So,
857
01:05:42,811 --> 01:05:46,560
do you think your mum
will divorce your dad to stay here?
858
01:05:49,359 --> 01:05:52,111
Sorry.
It's not a problem.
859
01:05:54,448 --> 01:05:58,066
You know, you're right.
That George Clooney's well buff.
860
01:05:58,201 --> 01:06:00,408
He'd never fancy your mum
in a zillion years.
861
01:06:00,537 --> 01:06:04,451
- No way.
- Now, why did you call us all over?
862
01:06:04,583 --> 01:06:06,291
Okay.
863
01:06:06,418 --> 01:06:10,167
Last night, my mum tried to have this
real woman-to-woman chat with me,
864
01:06:10,297 --> 01:06:12,870
after you opened
your big gob about Robbie.
865
01:06:13,008 --> 01:06:16,708
- Cringeworthy or what?
- But then she gave me this book.
866
01:06:16,845 --> 01:06:20,214
It's my mum's Boy Bible,
and it told me how to get Robbie back.
867
01:06:20,349 --> 01:06:23,848
- But isn't that book American?
- Yeah.
868
01:06:23,977 --> 01:06:27,263
Well, then it'll be about American boys,
won't it?
869
01:06:28,065 --> 01:06:31,184
No, it's about boykind.
870
01:06:31,777 --> 01:06:32,772
Oh!
871
01:06:33,445 --> 01:06:36,481
- It says boys are like elastic bands.
- What?
872
01:06:36,615 --> 01:06:38,773
What do you mean, like elastic bands?
873
01:06:38,909 --> 01:06:42,076
Well, they like to be all close,
and then after a bit of being close,
874
01:06:42,204 --> 01:06:45,573
they have to stretch and get far away.
And you have to let them.
875
01:06:45,707 --> 01:06:49,871
- And then they come springing back.
- Okay.
876
01:06:50,003 --> 01:06:52,245
So, what's your plan?
877
01:07:07,020 --> 01:07:10,306
First I ask his mate,
Dave the Laugh, to the gig.
878
01:07:10,774 --> 01:07:12,149
Don't worry about a glass. It's fine.
879
01:07:12,276 --> 01:07:15,976
I need him for my plan,
which involves the two osities.
880
01:07:17,197 --> 01:07:19,866
Maturiosity and Glaciosity.
881
01:07:21,243 --> 01:07:26,486
Firstly, I have to prove to Robbie that
I'm sophisticated and grown up.
882
01:07:26,623 --> 01:07:29,624
That's the maturiosity bit.
883
01:07:29,751 --> 01:07:35,125
Secondly, I must be distant
and alluring, and play hard to get.
884
01:07:35,257 --> 01:07:40,049
Ice cool like a glacier.
That's the glaciosity bit.
885
01:07:40,178 --> 01:07:44,887
The conclusion is that Robbie comes
springing back like an elastic band.
886
01:07:45,017 --> 01:07:49,809
He chucks Lindsay, and she's so upset,
she cancels her party.
887
01:07:49,938 --> 01:07:51,598
You look really
gorgeous tonight, Georgia.
888
01:07:51,732 --> 01:07:54,270
Thanks. You're very honest.
889
01:07:56,111 --> 01:08:00,773
Dave, what's the first thing
you notice in a girl?
890
01:08:00,907 --> 01:08:06,068
Well, most lads would say eyes.
But they're lying.
891
01:08:06,204 --> 01:08:10,866
- It's your nunganungas.
- What?
892
01:08:15,088 --> 01:08:17,081
Why do you call them nunganungas?
893
01:08:17,215 --> 01:08:20,631
Well, 'cause when you
get hold of one, and then let it go
894
01:08:20,761 --> 01:08:22,303
it goes nunga, nunga, nunga.
895
01:08:23,639 --> 01:08:24,919
One, two.
896
01:08:26,642 --> 01:08:31,220
Dave, you make me laugh
like a loon on loon tablets.
897
01:08:31,355 --> 01:08:33,181
You're such a laugh!
898
01:08:35,192 --> 01:08:38,442
Good evening, Brighton.
We are the Stiff Dylans.
899
01:08:48,956 --> 01:08:51,363
You spurn my natural emotions
900
01:08:51,541 --> 01:08:55,076
You make me feel like dirt
And I'm hurt
901
01:08:59,758 --> 01:09:02,379
And if I start a commotion
902
01:09:02,511 --> 01:09:05,796
I run the risk of losing you
And that's worse
903
01:09:10,519 --> 01:09:12,677
Ever fallen in love with someone
904
01:09:12,813 --> 01:09:15,185
Ever fallen in love
In love with someone
905
01:09:15,315 --> 01:09:17,687
Ever fallen in, in love with someone
906
01:09:17,818 --> 01:09:21,518
You shouldn't have fallen in love with
907
01:09:21,655 --> 01:09:26,732
I can't see much of a future
Unless we find out who's to blame
908
01:09:26,868 --> 01:09:28,113
What a shame
909
01:09:28,245 --> 01:09:29,490
Georgia!
910
01:09:32,291 --> 01:09:35,126
And we won't be together much longer
911
01:09:35,252 --> 01:09:38,952
Unless we realise that we are the same
912
01:09:57,149 --> 01:10:00,269
Hi, rock star. Great show.
913
01:10:00,402 --> 01:10:03,652
- Not really.
- What's wrong?
914
01:10:03,780 --> 01:10:05,572
I think I'm coming down
with a cold or something.
915
01:10:05,699 --> 01:10:08,570
I was just going to go say hi
to Dave the Laugh and then...
916
01:10:08,702 --> 01:10:11,822
No time.
Everyone's coming back to mine.
917
01:10:17,085 --> 01:10:18,793
No, you're right.
918
01:10:21,548 --> 01:10:24,834
Thanks, Dave. I had a lot of fun.
It was a laugh.
919
01:10:24,968 --> 01:10:27,839
It was one of the best nights of my life.
920
01:10:29,014 --> 01:10:35,348
I just want you to know,
I really... like you.
921
01:10:47,240 --> 01:10:52,946
- Thanks again, Dave. Good night.
- See you soon, beautiful.
922
01:11:00,796 --> 01:11:03,168
What's wrong with you?
Your plan worked.
923
01:11:03,298 --> 01:11:08,209
Poor Dave. I keep seeing his face
when he tried to kiss me.
924
01:11:08,345 --> 01:11:10,634
I didn't mean to lead him on.
925
01:11:21,525 --> 01:11:22,853
Hi, Dave.
926
01:11:24,987 --> 01:11:26,529
Is everything okay?
927
01:11:26,655 --> 01:11:29,905
- I hope your elastic band theory worked.
- What?
928
01:11:30,033 --> 01:11:33,533
Jas told Tom you only went out with me
to make Robbie jealous.
929
01:11:33,662 --> 01:11:35,204
You're a heartless user.
930
01:11:35,330 --> 01:11:38,248
- What you did, that's just pants, that is.
- I'm sorry.
931
01:11:38,375 --> 01:11:41,625
And I really thought,
you thought I was a laugh.
932
01:11:48,593 --> 01:11:50,253
I told you I'm sorry.
933
01:11:50,387 --> 01:11:53,922
I'm so beyond the Valley of Loserville
because of you and your big mouth.
934
01:11:54,057 --> 01:11:55,635
I didn't mean to tell Tom.
935
01:11:55,767 --> 01:11:58,555
I was just saying how much you really
liked Robbie and it just came out.
936
01:11:58,687 --> 01:12:00,596
Dave thinks I'm a heartless user.
937
01:12:00,731 --> 01:12:03,981
He's going to tell everyone,
and Robbie will hate me forever.
938
01:12:04,109 --> 01:12:06,398
If you weren't so loved up
with cabbage boy,
939
01:12:06,528 --> 01:12:09,233
you would have thought about that
before opening your fat gob.
940
01:12:09,364 --> 01:12:11,606
Oh, just stop being so jealous, Georgia.
941
01:12:11,742 --> 01:12:17,447
Jealous? What? Of Tom?
He's not even good enough for you, Jas.
942
01:12:17,581 --> 01:12:20,784
Do you seriously want to spend the rest
of your life picking out cabbages?
943
01:12:20,917 --> 01:12:23,409
At least Robbie has bigger goals.
944
01:12:23,545 --> 01:12:25,834
- He wants to do music.
- Well, at least Tom loves me.
945
01:12:25,964 --> 01:12:27,340
Robbie isn't even your boyfriend.
946
01:12:27,466 --> 01:12:30,716
Well, he would've been,
if you hadn't put your big foot in it.
947
01:12:30,844 --> 01:12:33,133
You never wanted me
to get Robbie, did you?
948
01:12:33,263 --> 01:12:35,055
You wanted to be
the one with the boyfriend.
949
01:12:35,182 --> 01:12:36,973
No, it's all your own fault, Georgia.
950
01:12:37,100 --> 01:12:39,888
You scared Robbie away
with all your scheming and pretending.
951
01:12:40,020 --> 01:12:42,262
And you said Lindsay was fake.
952
01:12:42,397 --> 01:12:45,434
- I'm never talking to you again.
- Good. End of.
953
01:12:45,567 --> 01:12:47,560
And I did give you a four for your nose.
954
01:12:47,694 --> 01:12:50,529
And I'm going to Lindsay's party
instead of yours.
955
01:12:51,782 --> 01:12:54,486
Georgia Nicolson.
Headmistress' office, now.
956
01:13:27,109 --> 01:13:29,564
You've really pissed off a lot of people.
957
01:13:29,695 --> 01:13:34,238
Dave's really cut up.
He's my mate, Georgia.
958
01:13:34,366 --> 01:13:36,405
I didn't mean to use him.
959
01:13:37,494 --> 01:13:41,278
You never called me
when you said you would.
960
01:13:41,415 --> 01:13:46,871
I handled it really badly, I know.
But I didn't want to two-time anyone.
961
01:13:47,004 --> 01:13:49,162
Or hurt anybody's feelings.
962
01:13:51,049 --> 01:13:53,671
So, you were thinking of
breaking up with Lindsay
963
01:13:53,802 --> 01:13:58,014
- and then you were going to call me?
- Yeah.
964
01:14:00,601 --> 01:14:05,227
And then I saw you with Dave at my gig.
I was gutted.
965
01:14:08,734 --> 01:14:10,810
But that's different now.
966
01:14:12,404 --> 01:14:16,449
Why did you tell Jas that
my brother wasn't good enough for her?
967
01:14:16,575 --> 01:14:18,614
I didn't mean that. We were fighting...
968
01:14:18,744 --> 01:14:20,570
Does that mean
I'm not good enough for you, either?
969
01:14:20,704 --> 01:14:22,697
No, of course not.
970
01:14:22,831 --> 01:14:26,330
See, I thought you were
different than that, Georgia.
971
01:14:26,710 --> 01:14:32,795
But you're not. You're just a kid.
You only think about yourself.
972
01:15:12,422 --> 01:15:14,130
Honestly, Becky,
he drives me crazy.
973
01:15:14,257 --> 01:15:17,792
He just doesn't understand how moving
to New Zealand might upset all of us.
974
01:15:17,928 --> 01:15:20,680
He just doesn't get it.
We're arguing at all hours of the day.
975
01:15:20,806 --> 01:15:22,383
I don't suppose
the time difference helps.
976
01:15:22,516 --> 01:15:24,140
Yeah, well, exactly.
977
01:15:24,268 --> 01:15:26,556
Maybe we should stay here
and let him go off on his own.
978
01:15:26,687 --> 01:15:30,731
I should have left mine ages ago.
Now I can do what I want when I want.
979
01:15:30,857 --> 01:15:32,352
But don't you think
the little one misses him?
980
01:15:32,484 --> 01:15:36,185
No! He has the monster
every other weekend.
981
01:15:36,321 --> 01:15:38,528
Which is more than he bloody did
when we were together.
982
01:15:38,657 --> 01:15:39,937
Listen, I've got to go.
I'm meeting Jem.
983
01:15:40,075 --> 01:15:41,355
Ooh! Lucky you!
984
01:15:41,493 --> 01:15:45,491
Oh, behave. Georgia!
Are you up, love?
985
01:15:45,622 --> 01:15:49,537
I need you to watch Libby after school.
I've got salsa group.
986
01:16:29,416 --> 01:16:33,330
- Can I help you?
- Hi.
987
01:16:33,462 --> 01:16:36,913
- I'm Georgia Nicolson.
- Bob's daughter?
988
01:16:37,883 --> 01:16:39,045
Yeah.
989
01:16:40,093 --> 01:16:43,094
Would it be possible
to speak with his boss?
990
01:16:43,722 --> 01:16:47,340
Well, I'm afraid Mr Hunter's
already left for the day.
991
01:16:50,896 --> 01:16:55,724
- Is there something I can help you with?
- It's my dad.
992
01:16:57,527 --> 01:16:59,686
He's been gone so long.
993
01:16:59,821 --> 01:17:04,946
It was a great honour for him to get that
promotion. Everyone here wanted it.
994
01:17:05,077 --> 01:17:06,191
Yeah.
995
01:17:08,288 --> 01:17:11,159
- He's good at his job, right?
- Yes.
996
01:17:12,125 --> 01:17:15,411
What was it you wanted
to say to Mr Hunter?
997
01:17:15,545 --> 01:17:17,668
You're going to think I'm mad,
998
01:17:17,798 --> 01:17:21,380
but I was going to ask him
if my dad could come back.
999
01:17:22,344 --> 01:17:25,629
You see, we really don't want to
move out to New Zealand.
1000
01:17:25,764 --> 01:17:27,757
But we don't want him to
leave us and stay there,
1001
01:17:27,891 --> 01:17:31,011
and me and my little sister
really want him to come home,
1002
01:17:31,144 --> 01:17:33,267
and I know my mum does, too.
1003
01:17:33,397 --> 01:17:37,145
She just might not tell him
on the phone, because, well...
1004
01:17:40,988 --> 01:17:43,858
I just really don't want us to be apart.
1005
01:17:52,249 --> 01:17:53,909
Hi, I'm back.
1006
01:17:54,042 --> 01:17:58,835
Thanks, darling, for holding down
the fort. I had such a great time.
1007
01:17:58,964 --> 01:18:03,044
And you're making dinner, too.
How wonderful.
1008
01:18:03,176 --> 01:18:05,667
Georgie, I want you to know how much
1009
01:18:05,804 --> 01:18:08,758
I appreciate you helping out
these past few weeks.
1010
01:18:08,890 --> 01:18:10,515
No problem, Mum.
1011
01:18:12,686 --> 01:18:14,844
Georgie, you've been so good
1012
01:18:14,980 --> 01:18:18,515
and I'm ready to talk
about this party you want so badly.
1013
01:18:18,650 --> 01:18:21,817
- I don't want it any more.
- What?
1014
01:18:21,945 --> 01:18:24,104
But you and Jas have been
planning this for months.
1015
01:18:24,239 --> 01:18:28,486
I can't explain it, Mum.
I just don't want a party.
1016
01:18:30,412 --> 01:18:33,413
I want to go to New Zealand.
1017
01:18:33,540 --> 01:18:36,790
- What?
- I've been really thinking about it,
1018
01:18:36,918 --> 01:18:41,995
and it's a huge opportunity for Dad.
And we shouldn't stand in his way.
1019
01:18:42,132 --> 01:18:46,177
As his wife,
you should support him, too.
1020
01:18:57,814 --> 01:19:00,602
There are five things
I will do now to be more mature
1021
01:19:00,734 --> 01:19:03,735
and prepare for
my new life in New Zealand.
1022
01:19:03,862 --> 01:19:07,445
One, stop reading magazines
and do Sudoku instead,
1023
01:19:07,574 --> 01:19:10,824
to maximise brain size
and stop Alzheimer's.
1024
01:19:16,625 --> 01:19:22,379
Two, do yoga every morning and night
and cleanse my body of toxicity
1025
01:19:22,506 --> 01:19:24,545
by banishing all negative feelings
1026
01:19:24,675 --> 01:19:27,925
towards ex-best friends
and bass players.
1027
01:19:30,389 --> 01:19:35,549
Three, listen to dolphins,
because they're clever and unselfish.
1028
01:19:37,187 --> 01:19:41,979
Four, no more chips.
Only organic fruit and veg.
1029
01:19:42,109 --> 01:19:45,478
Although not from Robbie's shop.
1030
01:19:45,612 --> 01:19:49,610
Five, a new style for a new me.
1031
01:20:14,349 --> 01:20:15,380
Hi.
1032
01:20:18,061 --> 01:20:21,726
I sort of need to ask you something
because you'll know.
1033
01:20:23,317 --> 01:20:28,025
You know, I don't blame you for
not wanting to talk to me.
1034
01:20:28,155 --> 01:20:32,698
What you said really hurt,
but you were right. It wasn't me.
1035
01:20:32,826 --> 01:20:36,277
It was beyond pants,
and I really am sorry.
1036
01:20:36,413 --> 01:20:40,411
I messed everything up with you,
and with Dave and your brother.
1037
01:20:40,542 --> 01:20:42,499
I guess I was just jealous
that Jas had a boyfriend...
1038
01:20:42,628 --> 01:20:45,165
I broke up with Lindsay last night.
1039
01:20:47,090 --> 01:20:48,086
Oh!
1040
01:21:01,271 --> 01:21:05,186
You know, I wrote a song about you.
1041
01:21:06,568 --> 01:21:11,693
- Really?
- It's called Bitch In A Uniform.
1042
01:21:13,784 --> 01:21:16,701
I wrote it when I was pissed off with you.
1043
01:21:20,374 --> 01:21:22,615
But I still like you, Georgia.
1044
01:21:22,751 --> 01:21:26,167
- Even though you are mad.
- No, you don't.
1045
01:21:26,296 --> 01:21:27,411
I do.
1046
01:21:30,342 --> 01:21:36,048
I can't stop thinking about you.
I was hoping...
1047
01:21:38,850 --> 01:21:42,895
- Maybe we can go out?
- Oh, no.
1048
01:21:46,525 --> 01:21:49,858
- I'm moving to New Zealand.
- What?
1049
01:21:51,613 --> 01:21:55,029
What is wrong with you?
You're so random.
1050
01:21:55,158 --> 01:21:58,029
That's what I wanted to
talk to you about.
1051
01:21:59,871 --> 01:22:05,992
My dad's just got a job out there.
And, at first, I said I didn't want to leave.
1052
01:22:06,128 --> 01:22:09,497
And then my mum started acting weird
with this builder guy.
1053
01:22:09,631 --> 01:22:12,039
And so I said I'll go out there.
1054
01:22:13,593 --> 01:22:17,176
I guess I really just
don't want my folks to split up.
1055
01:22:18,015 --> 01:22:19,675
Hey, no one does.
1056
01:22:22,019 --> 01:22:28,638
At least you're doing something about it.
It's just a shame you're leaving.
1057
01:22:39,036 --> 01:22:41,609
No, hold my hand, you muppet,
1058
01:22:41,747 --> 01:22:46,041
so we can at least walk together,
so we don't look like sad gits.
1059
01:23:08,649 --> 01:23:09,811
Okay.
1060
01:23:12,069 --> 01:23:15,485
I was experimenting before
I dyed the whole thing.
1061
01:23:15,614 --> 01:23:19,113
Don't dye it blonde.
It's much nicer natural.
1062
01:23:42,891 --> 01:23:47,103
Happy Birthday to you
1063
01:23:47,229 --> 01:23:51,558
Happy Birthday to you
1064
01:23:51,692 --> 01:23:56,400
Happy Birthday, dear Georgia
1065
01:23:56,530 --> 01:24:00,065
Happy Birthday to you
1066
01:24:00,200 --> 01:24:02,905
- Blow them out.
- Blow out the candles.
1067
01:24:11,128 --> 01:24:14,378
It's from all of us.
We want you to get whatever you want.
1068
01:24:14,506 --> 01:24:19,963
A mobile phone? And maybe
something nice to wear for tonight.
1069
01:24:20,095 --> 01:24:25,090
- Why? What's happening tonight?
- We're going out dancing.
1070
01:24:26,226 --> 01:24:28,895
- Jem's not coming, is he?
- No, hon, just me and you.
1071
01:24:29,021 --> 01:24:33,314
- I'm taking you to your first night club.
- Not Tramps.
1072
01:24:33,442 --> 01:24:35,518
That's where Lindsay's having her party.
1073
01:24:35,652 --> 01:24:39,401
Tramps? That is so last year.
1074
01:24:39,531 --> 01:24:43,611
- We're going to a brand new club.
- That sounds great, Mum.
1075
01:24:43,744 --> 01:24:45,783
Shall we go and call Dad?
1076
01:24:46,955 --> 01:24:51,249
Well, I'm sure he'll call later.
It's the wrong time out there, so...
1077
01:24:51,376 --> 01:24:53,784
Okay, Libby, well, be a good girl,
won't you?
1078
01:24:53,920 --> 01:24:55,747
I'm going to bed now.
- Yeah.
1079
01:24:55,881 --> 01:24:57,458
And I'll come and get you
in the morning.
1080
01:24:57,591 --> 01:25:01,007
- See you in the morning!
- Okay. All right, then.
1081
01:25:01,136 --> 01:25:03,888
- Night, night. Love you. Bye.
- Bye-bye.
1082
01:25:17,986 --> 01:25:21,604
- You look so beautiful.
- Thanks.
1083
01:25:22,574 --> 01:25:24,650
Come on, munchkin.
1084
01:25:27,829 --> 01:25:31,744
Mum, this looks pretty cool,
but it's dead.
1085
01:25:31,875 --> 01:25:33,204
Are you sure you got the right address?
1086
01:25:33,335 --> 01:25:35,328
It's supposed to be
the most happening joint in town.
1087
01:25:35,462 --> 01:25:36,707
Oh, Mum.
1088
01:25:40,801 --> 01:25:42,343
You all right?
1089
01:25:44,263 --> 01:25:47,216
Happy Birthday, Georgia!
1090
01:25:48,433 --> 01:25:51,802
Oh, my God! Mum.
1091
01:25:51,937 --> 01:25:54,973
Jas helped me
organise the whole thing.
1092
01:25:55,107 --> 01:25:56,269
What?
1093
01:26:15,168 --> 01:26:16,449
Georgia.
1094
01:26:18,422 --> 01:26:21,376
There's someone else
you have to thank, too.
1095
01:26:31,893 --> 01:26:33,720
Jem's been an angel.
1096
01:26:34,771 --> 01:26:36,764
- Thanks, Jem.
- It was my pleasure.
1097
01:26:36,898 --> 01:26:38,690
Georgia, we have
another surprise for you.
1098
01:26:38,817 --> 01:26:40,359
We weren't quite sure when
the right time to do this...
1099
01:26:40,485 --> 01:26:42,976
- Mum!
- What?
1100
01:26:43,113 --> 01:26:46,529
- Please don't get divorced.
- What are you on about?
1101
01:26:46,658 --> 01:26:47,773
Look.
1102
01:26:58,378 --> 01:26:59,659
Come on.
1103
01:27:02,883 --> 01:27:04,377
Looking good.
1104
01:27:07,512 --> 01:27:08,592
Hey.
1105
01:27:17,481 --> 01:27:18,679
- Dad.
- I told you
1106
01:27:18,815 --> 01:27:21,057
I wouldn't miss your birthday party.
1107
01:27:21,193 --> 01:27:25,143
But what about New Zealand?
We're supposed to be coming out there.
1108
01:27:25,280 --> 01:27:29,741
Honey, it must've been really hard
for you to come to my office.
1109
01:27:29,868 --> 01:27:31,777
When I heard what happened,
1110
01:27:31,912 --> 01:27:34,664
- well, it broke my heart.
- Dad.
1111
01:27:34,790 --> 01:27:37,197
Well, you made quite
an impression, little lady.
1112
01:27:37,334 --> 01:27:40,121
My boss ordered me home immediately.
1113
01:27:40,253 --> 01:27:44,212
They offered
me a great new position, here.
1114
01:27:44,341 --> 01:27:45,586
Really?
1115
01:27:51,556 --> 01:27:53,715
- We're not leaving.
- I know.
1116
01:27:54,935 --> 01:27:58,802
Now, why on earth did you think
I was divorcing your dad?
1117
01:27:58,939 --> 01:28:01,062
Divorce? What's going on?
1118
01:28:02,567 --> 01:28:07,229
I just thought that because you've been
wearing tight tops and more lippy,
1119
01:28:07,364 --> 01:28:10,116
and it looked like you and Jem were...
1120
01:28:11,994 --> 01:28:14,449
You see. It just looked really...
1121
01:28:18,875 --> 01:28:20,915
Happy Birthday, Georgia.
1122
01:28:23,338 --> 01:28:28,166
Jem's boyfriend owns this club.
He helped arrange all of this for you.
1123
01:28:28,302 --> 01:28:31,967
Interior decorator? Hello.
1124
01:28:35,225 --> 01:28:39,852
Your father may drive us mad
but I love him to bits.
1125
01:28:42,858 --> 01:28:45,313
This is the best party ever.
1126
01:28:45,444 --> 01:28:49,655
Put your hands in the air
and wave them like you just don't care!
1127
01:28:49,781 --> 01:28:51,904
Let me hear you say...
1128
01:28:55,787 --> 01:28:58,076
Make some noise
for the Stiff Dylans!
1129
01:29:06,506 --> 01:29:08,914
- Who invited them?
- Your mum did.
1130
01:29:11,053 --> 01:29:13,757
- What?
- I know a fittie when I see one.
1131
01:29:13,889 --> 01:29:18,930
Now, this is a new song I wrote
and it's about Georgia.
1132
01:29:19,061 --> 01:29:21,386
And it's called Ultraviolet.
1133
01:29:34,868 --> 01:29:39,744
She is a wave
And she's breaking
1134
01:29:39,873 --> 01:29:44,120
She's a problem to solve
1135
01:29:46,213 --> 01:29:51,005
And in that circle she's making
1136
01:29:51,134 --> 01:29:56,092
I will always revolve
1137
01:29:58,684 --> 01:30:01,353
And on her sight
1138
01:30:01,478 --> 01:30:05,179
these eyes depend
1139
01:30:05,983 --> 01:30:11,937
Invisible and indivisible
That fire you ignited
1140
01:30:12,072 --> 01:30:17,493
Good, bad and undecided
Burns when I stand beside it
1141
01:30:17,619 --> 01:30:20,110
Your light is ultraviolet
1142
01:30:20,247 --> 01:30:22,738
Visions so insane
1143
01:30:22,874 --> 01:30:25,745
They travel unravelling
through my brain
1144
01:30:25,877 --> 01:30:28,831
Cold when I am denied it
1145
01:30:28,964 --> 01:30:31,206
Your light is ultraviolet
1146
01:30:31,341 --> 01:30:32,752
I think I broke my neck.
1147
01:30:32,884 --> 01:30:35,921
Ultraviolet
1148
01:30:42,436 --> 01:30:45,935
The fire you ignited
1149
01:30:46,064 --> 01:30:48,353
Good, bad and undecided
1150
01:30:48,483 --> 01:30:51,437
Burns when I stand beside it
1151
01:30:51,570 --> 01:30:56,861
Your light is ultraviolet
Visions so insane
1152
01:30:56,992 --> 01:30:58,190
They travel...
1153
01:31:08,712 --> 01:31:12,460
Before I vom over this vile song
1154
01:31:12,591 --> 01:31:15,082
I'd like to make one
little announcement myself.
1155
01:31:15,218 --> 01:31:19,002
Georgia Nicolson is a lad-nabbing letch
1156
01:31:19,139 --> 01:31:23,516
who can't keep her slutty minx hands
off other people's boyfriends!
1157
01:31:29,149 --> 01:31:32,352
Lindsay? What are you doing?
1158
01:31:32,486 --> 01:31:35,606
I know you're upset,
but let's be mature adults.
1159
01:31:35,739 --> 01:31:39,357
You're just a big, fat, minging minger
1160
01:31:39,493 --> 01:31:44,451
with huge knickers
and a ginormous schnozzle!
1161
01:31:44,581 --> 01:31:47,203
Robbie? This is your last chance.
1162
01:31:47,334 --> 01:31:52,043
It's either her, sad olive girl
who gets everything wrong,
1163
01:31:52,172 --> 01:31:55,790
or me, the woman who's
so perfect for you.
1164
01:32:05,394 --> 01:32:07,351
Georgia's perfect, too.
1165
01:32:08,522 --> 01:32:10,764
She's just a perfect nutter.
1166
01:32:17,864 --> 01:32:22,242
Obviously, Robbie prefers
his girlfriends unfake!
1167
01:32:30,669 --> 01:32:32,128
Nunga, nunga, nunga!
1168
01:32:40,846 --> 01:32:43,597
I'm sorry she tried to ruin your party.
1169
01:32:47,728 --> 01:32:49,601
You think I'm perfect?
1170
01:32:51,023 --> 01:32:52,814
I think you're mad.
1171
01:32:53,817 --> 01:32:55,691
You're perfect for me.
1172
01:33:22,721 --> 01:33:26,470
Angus looks like
he's in Brokeback Mountain.
1173
01:33:26,600 --> 01:33:29,803
Where is the marmalade?
I haven't even got any marmalade.
1174
01:33:29,937 --> 01:33:33,140
There are five things
very right with my life.
1175
01:33:34,900 --> 01:33:38,648
One, my mum and dad
are totally loved up.
1176
01:33:38,779 --> 01:33:42,823
So I don't mind them
snogging in front of us any more.
1177
01:33:42,950 --> 01:33:48,026
Two, Angus is a legend,
even in fancy dress.
1178
01:33:48,956 --> 01:33:54,460
Three, I have really top friends that
put up with me even when I act dim.
1179
01:33:54,836 --> 01:33:57,837
Which I'm not going
to do any more.
1180
01:33:57,965 --> 01:33:59,459
- Okay, bye.
Bye.
1181
01:33:59,633 --> 01:34:01,756
- See you, Libby.
Bye, have a nice day.
1182
01:34:01,885 --> 01:34:06,880
Four, I don't care any more
about looking perfect. It's so overrated.
1183
01:34:08,308 --> 01:34:10,100
And five,
1184
01:34:10,227 --> 01:34:12,800
I don't need a nose job or blonde hair
1185
01:34:12,938 --> 01:34:16,888
'cause my sex-god boyfriend
likes me just the way I am.
1186
01:34:17,025 --> 01:34:18,270
Result!