[mellow piano music]
- Hey, Erica.
My name is Lisa, and I'm calling
from a video production company in Boston.
- We're producing a documentary on people
with interesting and unusual names.
- And we were wondering if you would be interested
in sharing some of your experiences
having the name Bill Cosby.
- I know that you pronounce your name Bails and not Balls.
- Is Ronald McDonald in?
- Hi, I'm trying to get in touch with Dr. Bonnie Beaver.
- Hey, this message is for Mr. David Boring.
- Hello, this message is for Jack Goff.
- I'm wondering if you've had any experiences
with your name.
I'm not even sure exactly how it's pronounced.
[woman] It is as you would imagine. Hore.
- Okay, all right. Have you--
...problems with it all the time. All the time.
- [Narrator] Most of us have names that are neutral,
they don't provoke dumb jokes when we're introduced.
As kids, we didn't get mocked at roll call.
But many names are not neutral.
They suggest a negative attribute,
or have sexual connotations.
The name may already belong
to a famous or a notorious person.
It may, for any number of reasons,
quite simply be funny.
- My name is Mark Gotobed.
A smile will come across people's faces,
and they will say, "Hold on.
"As in go to bed?"
And I will say, often now,
"Yes, just like you're telling your children
"to go to bed."
- When I'm addressed in court, things are kind of formal.
Just as I would say Your Honor or Judge,
I'm addressed as Attorney Doktor.
My name is Joseph Doktor,
and people call me Joe Doktor.
You'd get a lot of people say,
"Well, you know, if you became a doctor,
"you'd be Dr. Doktor."
Well, yeah, I was a great disappointment to my mother
because I became a lawyer and she really wanted me
to be a doctor.
- My name is Linda Slutsky.
The name is from Russia,
and their name was Slutzky,
[spells name aloud]
And then one day,
my family decided to change it to Slutsky.
First time I realized the name was unusual
was when I was in high school.
A friend of mine said, "Slut,"
and I went, "What?"
And then all of a sudden,
a group of boys was following me down the hall,
and I had to run down the stairwell.
And I didn't know what was going on.
I went home and I looked it up in the dictionary,
and lo and behold,
I found out it meant, I think, a whore?
I was devastated 'cause I wasn't like that.
I was like a really prudish little girl in high school.
- My name is Stuart Putz.
I've had the name since I've been,
I think, around three months old.
I was adopted.
There probably was some heckling here and there,
but I've always been a pretty jovial kid
as well as like to wrassle,
so if somebody gave me too much of a hard time,
I'd go have a good rough tumble with them,
and that usually would stop.
- This is my adopted mother,
Jeannie Escobar Putz.
This is my grandfather, Clifford Putz,
with my cousin Lonnie Putz,
who is the son of Larry Putz.
This was on the Putz Ranch.
Probably the biggest thing I've heard is,
"You're such a putz!"
Okay. All right. Guess that's my last name,
so yes, I am a Putz.
But you know, some people look at that as
you're a klutz, or you're a failure.
- We're the Clutzes. - We're the Clutzes.
- Why did you do this?
- I was voted Most Clumsy in high school,
so you know, that was the superlative I got.
It was the only superlative I got,
so clumsiest person because of my name,
not because I'm generally clumsy.
All the way through grade school,
I kind of, kinda had that little pit in my stomach
anytime it was gonna be named in an assembly
or at roll call or anything like that.
- [Narrator] Having a name like Clutz or Putz
might not seem like a big deal,
but imagine having to brace yourself for a reaction
every single time you introduce yourself.
Imagine always having to plan ahead,
devise strategies, prepare a ready comeback
for the inevitable lame remark.
Problems that a Smith or Jones never even has to think about
loom large in every social or professional interaction.
But there's no support group for people with strange names.
You're on your own.
It's every schmuck for himself.
- My name is Howard Schmuck.
The first time I became aware of it,
I was in ninth grade.
I was reading Harold Robbins' book, The Carpetbaggers,
and schmuck was in there a lot,
and I had no idea what it was meaning,
so I went to my English teacher,
and I asked him.
And he said it's time you knew.
It's humorous when I am picked up
at a major airport and my last name
is on the board for the driver.
People are looking and looking to see
who's gonna actually walk to that name.
- My name is Greg Boggis.
I imagine it's probably in the Urban Dictionary
under a number of unsavory things,
but you know, it's the family name and I like it.
- Everyone thought they were original
in calling me Crapo or telling me that I was full of crap.
Where I grew up,
my dad owned a funeral home in town.
At Halloween, people would put the letter Y
over the O, so it would read Crapy Funeral Home
as everyone drove by.
People seemed to have a lot of fun with that.
And I asked my parents
why we had to have the last name Crapo,
and in fact, in town, it was a well-known name.
We'd been there for generations.
- The history behind my name is honestly,
it's kind of funny.
We got in the back of a cab after asking a half-dozen locals
around Dublin and Cork, like, "You guys know any Mullarkeys?
"You know anything about 'em?" No. So we got in this cab.
You know, it was the oldest cab driver in the country.
I swear to God. He was like, "Mullarkey?
"I think most of you died out in the famine,
"or left the place."
You ever heard that expression, "You're full of mullarkey"?
So he says that, back in the day,
the Mullarkey Clan,
not wanting to pay taxes on British pounds,
would melt down the coin,
and coined their own currency, the mullarkey.
Then when they went and tried to use this coin
in other villages, they wouldn't take it.
They wouldn't accept it because you were to be put to death
if you were found with the currency.
You're full of mullarkey. Get outta here.
That's about all we know of our family history.
- My legal name is Adelaide Smoki Bacon.
I was at Brookline High School.
It was kind of a verbal bullying that I took
when I would come in to watch the basketball games.
There was a Smoky Kelleher,
who was a famous basketball coach,
and I would walk in and I would hear,
"Smoky Joe, rah rah.
"Smoky Joe, rah rah."
The idea that I was being called Smoki at that time,
this was like 1943, 1944,
women who smoked were considered women of the streets.
And that would just totally destroy me.
- [Narrator] An unusual name is far from the worst handicap
to have as you go through life,
but it is something you have to deal with every day.
It's something you had to face as a kid
when you wanted desperately to fit in.
An unusual name can make you stronger.
It can help you develop a sense of humor.
But make no mistake,
your name can influence your personality
and affect the course of your life.
- I have spent the last decade studying
and writing about names.
I look at how we choose names,
how we perceive them,
and how name trends change over time.
When people ask me what I do,
and I say I'm a baby name expert,
there's always this moment of confusion.
What could there possibly be to be expert about?
Names are just names.
But then, as soon as you get talking on the subject,
everyone has a thousand stories.
Everyone has a thousand opinions.
And everybody realizes that their name,
and the names of everyone they know
send enormous signals to the world.
- I was just Jeff, right?
Until I went out into the real world after high school,
and college, et cetera, and met other people that,
I became Studley.
And there was some pressure to live up to a name
that just immediately has that type of reaction.
Well, he's gotta be 6'5, 225 pounds,
and perfectly built.
Somehow, you had to live up to some of that, all right?
And so I always tried to take care of myself,
and maybe stay in shape, or stay well-read,
or be interesting.
Not be disappointing when people meet Studley.
- [Narrator] At worst, a name like Studley
might set up unrealistic expectations.
But in a world all but overrun with bullies and dimwits,
your name can make you
the object of contempt, derision, or worse.
- My name is Richard, and the last name is Gay.
That's spelled G-A-Y.
You know, when I was a kid, being gay, homosexual,
wasn't as accepted as it is today.
Living with that name today is different
than it was when I was a kid.
You know, I'd get taunted and sometimes physically accosted.
You know, I can remember females, you know,
kinda whacking me around a little bit here and there.
So I received a lot of ridicule from other kids.
- Most kids can't handle being bullied.
It would be a very rare child who could do it,
mostly because they generally identify with the thing
they're being bullied about.
So they don't have any perspective on it.
- [Richard] You're gay.
He's gay, or something like that.
I'm not gay. I'm straight.
I was bullied because of my last name,
and it just didn't make me feel good at all.
It made me feel bad.
All the other kids keep telling me that I'm gay.
My mother used to say,
"Well, tell them that you are gay.
"Tell 'em that you're a very happy person."
I'd say, "Okay, Ma."
- So if a child is being bullied,
it can really impact the way they view themselves.
It could impact their level of motivation,
and compounded over time,
it could really lead to other issues.
- [Richard] At some points in my life,
I did try to overcompensate
my masculine traits, so to speak.
My bravado.
I am an alcoholic. I'm in recovery.
I've been sober for a long time now.
People talk about, you know,
what their childhood was like and feeling different.
And putting alcohol in your system is a way
to relieve those fears and make you feel like you fit in.
- If they start making fun of you,
you can just say I don't have to take it personally
'cause it's not who I am.
Try to witness the name and not identify with the name.
- You know, having the last name Gay
has definitely affected who I am.
- [Narrator] Being mocked because of your name
can do a number on your self-esteem.
For some, an effective strategy
is to roll with the punches and counterattack with humor.
- So my name is Nardizzi,
and it's not quite as unique as some of these names,
but I had issues with my name at school.
The teasing that I remember is basically
just simply asking me why I was dizzy all the time.
This kid over here is dizzy.
Spin him around. He's dizzy.
I just wish knowing now what I know about humor
that I had more of a,
some wit to fire back at these punks.
These people that torment you, they'll leave you alone
once you hit 'em with a few zingers.
I'm a real stickler for fresh milk.
My fantasy is to suck a cow's udder
during a solar eclipse.
As a comedian,
I have to use humor all the time.
Like I said, I don't get heckled very often,
but I gotta be able to talk
about myself and make fun of myself
and people are laughing at me.
And I think it's great that these people, you know,
they're not professional comedians.
They're not writers, but they're sensing as well
that they're in situations. This guy's bustin' my balls,
or this guy's just a douche,
and I need humor here
'cause if I get pissed and walk out,
I'm in the company of my co-workers,
or what have you,
so you gotta use humor and make the best of that situation.
- My name is Al Dente.
When I get pasta, it's always al dente.
I was named after my grandfather,
who passed just before I was born.
His name was Albert James Dente.
I know after he passed,
a bill collector called my grandmother
and asked if Peg Dente was home, and she said, "Oh, yeah.
"Well, I'm Peg Dente."
And then the guy thought he was very clever and said,
"Oh, who's your husband, Al Dente?"
And he got a chuckle out of it, and she said, "Well, yes.
"Actually he was Al Dente and he just passed."
- My name is Barb Dwyer,
and I'm a real estate agent.
And I remember the day.
I was sitting there at the lunch table,
and with people.
I had no idea who they were.
Sat down, introduced myself as Barb Dwyer,
and the whole place cracked up.
And I says, "What's so funny?
"It's my name." And they said,
"Barbed wire, like the fence?"
And I got it.
I was 13 before I realized my name was a little unusual.
- There are certain names that are kind of a gimmick.
Whether it's the first and last name matching,
like Philip Philips or forming a phrase like Shanda Leer.
A lot of people say, "How could the parents do that?"
But to those parents,
often it's, "How can I not do that?"
That one name is different
from every other name that I could give my child.
It stands out in a way that no other could.
- I've certainly got enough falling tree jokes
in my time.
Someone would say, "Oh, Tim Burr.
"Tim-ber."
I don't think my mother had any negative intent.
[laughter] - I worked with a young lady,
who happened to be in our wedding party also.
And she said to me one day when I was pregnant with him,
"If you have a boy, you should name him Timothy."
And I kind of looked at her, and you know,
didn't make much of it.
She said, "Then you could go out and yell Tim Burr."
And I thought, "Well, that's kinda cute."
So I told his dad about it,
and there you go. [laughs]
- When I was a kid, my mother used to yell from home
to find where we were, 'cause back in those days,
kids still could be anywhere in the neighborhood, you know.
And so she used to call.
- Tim Burr!
And he would trot home.
[laughs]
- It's a vivid memory because she would do it often.
You know, almost every night for dinner.
- It worked every time.
- That's funny.
I don't recall her calling the other names out.
- If I had to do it all over again,
he definitely would be Tim Burr.
It was done with love.
- [Narrator] I doubt that Tim ever suffered any distress
from the name so lightheartedly conferred
by Mr. and Mrs. Burr.
Most often, the culprit isn't the parents,
but rather the language itself.
Certain words have a way of creating mischief
when they get together.
A union that might have happened centuries ago,
quite arbitrarily.
In other words, it's nobody's fault,
but if you have one those names,
it might seem like more of a curse than a legacy.
- My name is Elana Cockburn,
and my last name is spelled
[spells name aloud]
And I didn't know what cock was,
so I was totally just not getting it.
And kids were starting to laugh,
and I don't know where the teachers were,
where the chaperones were, but I was totally caught off guard,
and it really affected me.
I felt really embarrassed.
- A sexually suggestive name could bring up
issues of confusion and shame for the child,
and it would be important that a child understands
what their name means so that they don't make up
ideas in their mind,
which is very common for children to do.
- When I first realized that my name was unusual
was when kids started mentioning something about it.
And I got the fuller meaning when I came home,
and "Like, Mom, this kid's making fun of me."
Like, I knew it was something inappropriate,
but that's when I finally found out that it was like
a hooker, what a hooker is.
- If a girl has a sexually suggestive name,
it would be a nightmare for most girls.
Now how they deal with the nightmare,
they may react to it in very, very different ways.
Some of them may say, "I never want to have sex."
Some of them might become hypersexual.
There may be a lot of different ways
that they'll deal with it,
but no matter what, it's gonna be a nightmare.
- I explained to my kids when they asked me the question,
"What is a hooker?"
I told them that they were ladies of the evening
or prostitutes that would sell themselves to men for money.
And they kind of looked at me like, "Okay."
We are a descendant of Fightin' Joe Hooker.
General Hooker was in the Civil War,
and he was like a crazy... brought all these girls back.
Always liked drinking.
- Hooker was associated with Fightin' Joe,
because he used to bring ladies of the evening
to his troops before they fought battle.
- Being teased as a kid was a little hard.
And then, of course, as you become a teenager,
it gets a little bit different.
On a higher level.
And substitute teachers were always
pronouncing my name incorrectly,
which was always embarrassing in the middle of class.
They, too, stumbled over my first and last name constantly.
When somebody heard my last name for the first time,
or saw my last name for the first time,
usually was followed by giggling and laughter.
As I got older,
yes, the C from Cobbledick got changed to a G.
Gobbledick.
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
Your last name is Dick.
My father did share with me from his generation,
they used to refer to him as Wrinkledork.
- [Narrator] A name that includes intimate body parts
or suggests promiscuity is sure to get attention,
but for every Cobbledick or Cockburn,
there are 100 others who were, quite accidentally,
named after celebrities or cultural icons.
So what happens when your name is famous,
but you, personally, are not?
- The Beatles arrived in 1964,
and I was born in 1958.
As a kid, it was very tough to deal with having
the name Paul McCartney.
No child wants that kind of attention.
And I remember being at awards ceremonies
for Little League,
and I was probably the only kid in that room
that was saying, "Please don't call my name."
It felt more, to me, like I was being laughed at
whenever my name was called out.
I actually think it had a huge impact on my personality.
Her name is Linda McCartney.
- Stop it.
Okay.
My name is Linda McCartney.
- And my name is Paul McCartney.
We've been married for 26 years.
- 26 years.
You cannot say Paul and Linda McCartney
without having people go,
"Paul and Linda McCartney? Really, really?"
- My full name is Ronald James McDonald IV.
My grandfather and great-grandfather were around
before the hamburger, so they didn't have to deal with this.
So my father was born in '48,
so he barely had to tolerate it.
For me, it was horrible.
And I think if I was born in the current times,
they would have called it school bullying
probably from the beginning.
As a child, it was very difficult.
It was worse for me than it may have been
if I lived in one town my whole life.
My mother moved us wherever she could find good work,
which meant in my first four grades,
I went to 15 schools.
So that's 15 new schools, new roll call.
I never let it shame me,
but it didn't make it any easier
to be teased.
Each school, each circumstance, was pretty much
the same reaction when I would be announced.
You know, they would say Ronald McDonald,
and before I could even say, "Here,"
there would be laughter,
sometimes for five, ten minutes.
I can't tell you how many teachers
would just remark that having a name like that
would build character,
and later in life, I would appreciate it.
- When I tell people my name is Alfred Capone,
they usually ask me if I'm related to the real Al Capone,
or if I'm in some way associated with the Mafia,
I normally tell them no.
The name actually, Alfred Capone, has been in my family
for about three or four generations.
I did get a tattoo of Capone
with the Italian flag on my ankle,
so it's something that I'm proud of.
Certainly proud of my family and my heritage and my name.
I think there are plenty of names out there
that are a lot worse than being named Alfred Capone,
such as serial killers or murderers.
- My full name is Donald L. Trump.
My dad's full name was Donald L. Trump.
My mother named me Skip Trump.
In the last few months,
I've increasingly used Skip Trump,
even in professional situations,
because the other Donald Trump
has gotten a lot of attention.
When it's a phone call, I often get the response,
"No, that can't be your name."
When I show my ID,
I've had TSA agents at the airport say,
"Is that really your name?"
This is a U.S. passport,
and they're asking me if it's forged, basically.
- Go ahead, Dad. Introduce yourself.
- I'm Donald R. Duck, Senior.
- And I'm Donald R. Duck, Junior.
- And I'm Donald R. Duck III.
- Is that better?
- Go for it. - Go ahead.
- What? - Do it again.
- Oh.
I'm Donald R. Duck, Senior.
- And I'm Donald R. Duck, Junior.
- And I'm Donald R. Duck III.
- [all] And we're the Ducks.
- You didn't get that memo.
- I didn't say that.
- And we're the three Ducks in a row.
No?
- And we're all the three Ducks in a row.
[laughter]
- That wasn't good.
- And we're the three Ducks in a row.
We are the Duck family.
- I got lost in 1967 at the Expo in Montreal, Canada.
We were going into the United States Pavilion.
I was at the bottom of the escalator, and my parents
ended up at the top of the escalator,
so I got lost and I remember contacting security,
and they asked me my name,
and I said, "My name's Donald Duck."
And they said, "Well, what's your father's name?"
And I said, "My father's name is Donald Duck as well.
And I remember the one person saying to the other one,
"I'm not saying that over the intercom."
- When I was in school and a youngster,
Trump was just another name.
I first became aware of Donald J. Trump
probably in the early to mid 1980's.
I began to be curious about his lineage,
and so thought it would be interesting, perhaps,
to write him a note and let him know
that there was another Donald Trump,
and asked if there was any relationship.
I was the president of the Roswell Park Cancer Institute.
We were beginning a fundraising campaign called
Going Bald for Bucks,
so I suggested to Mr. Trump that perhaps
he'd like to join me.
- The other Donald Trump is me, because you're the famous one.
I've been hearing your name for years and years.
- He was willing to do a video that we showed
at the kickoff for this event.
- What you do in life is more important
than what I do in life,
so I say Donald L. Trump, which is you,
is probably more important than Donald J. Trump.
- He was very gracious and took it in good humor.
- I just wanna congratulate you
on the great work you've done,
the shaving the head thing.
Donald, I really...
I'm glad it's you and it's not me.
- And Mr. Trump did give quite a generous contribution
to cancer research at Roswell Park.
- If you saw my name officially,
it'll be Harold William Potter, Jr.
But kids are not gonna call you Harold,
so they started calling me Harry,
and that's been my name ever since.
When the book first came out, I was aware of it,
but I didn't think too much of it because
I didn't perceive, at that time,
what kind of phenomenon this was going to be.
- Where I work,
you have to present a badge to open the door.
So I'll just say, "My name is Bond."
And then they was like, "Okay, so what's your first name?"
James. And they just like,
they turn around slowly like, "Really?
"That's the coolest name ever.
"Do you say it like that all the time?"
And I was like, "Yeah, I say it like that all the time."
- As new students on the first day,
you stand up and say your name.
So here I am in the classroom.
I stand up and I said my name is Donald Sutherland.
And I remember hearing someone in the background chirping,
and they said, "Oh, my God, there's the class clown."
I actually went home and asked my parents.
Why would someone say that?
Who's Donald Sutherland? And that's when they told me,
at that point, that it was some famous actor.
- I did have one occasion,
trying a case in the Federal District Court.
The judge looked at me and she said,
"Do you realize that your name is a fictional character?"
And, of course, I knew that,
and I said, "Yes, Your Honor, I do."
And she then said, "I can't look at you without
"thinking of Harry Potter."
And I laughed about it,
and thankfully, I won the case.
- When I show up for a reservation,
they know Donald Sutherland's not gonna be there.
Hi, I'm Donald Sutherland.
- You're Donald Sutherland? - Yes.
But even when I show up,
they kinda still, you can feel that.
[slight gasp] That disappointment.
- You look different than the movies.
- I'm a little shorter.
- A little shorter?
Did they give you lifts in the movie?
- I would hear that a lot from people.
Donald Sutherland? You looked taller in MASH.
- It puts people at ease.
As soon as they know my name, it's more comfortable.
They can relax.
Oh, you're James Bond, you know.
Do you have any gadgets on you?
I was actually calling a young lady,
and she wasn't home.
I think her mom picked up the phone,
so she was like, "Oh, so who's calling?"
I said, "James." And she says, "James who?"
I said, "James Bond," so she said, "Oh, no.
"And I'm Tina Turner."
And she hung up the phone.
- Yeah, my name is Gunther Frankenstein,
and the nickname is Guinea,
and we're in Lebanon, New Hampshire,
and it's snowing outside right now.
Oh, there was a lot of joking,
but because we were German,
I don't think it had anything to do with the name Frankenstein.
Everyone in the United States resented Germany,
and rightly so.
Because we were German, that we were automatically the enemy.
- They had such an association with one aspect of him,
that they couldn't see him for who he was.
I would say, for example, since we're talking about Germany,
it's the same thing about the swastika.
But the swastika as a symbol
has been around for thousands of years.
If I show you a swastika now,
you won't be able to know the thing for itself
because of what's been associated with it
only for the last 70 years.
- Many time, we had to fight our way to school.
And then one time, it was the FBI checkin' us out.
Someone probably said we were spies or something.
Who knows?
- We make assumptions based off of our past experiences.
Someone might hear a name and it might
hit some type of internal trigger for them
where they're already making assumptions about that person
before they've even given that person a chance
to understand who they are.
- You know, the folks that have helped me
in my life have often encountered the same sort of
disbelief that I encounter.
My assistant will call to make an airplane reservation
or a restaurant reservation and not infrequently
be met with a, "Is that really the name?"
Or, "You're kidding."
- For three. Donald Trump.
- I don't know how Donald J. Trump feels about
the name, but I love it 'cause it's my dad.
- Actually, before we got married,
I said to her,
I said, "Don't marry me if you do not want to name
"your first son Donald III."
And she said to me,
"Well, that's okay with me as long as we call him Bobby."
- My name is Donald Robert Duck III.
But I go by Bobby 'cause it differentiates
between my dad and my grandfather.
- It was just easier.
It was just easier to be something
other than Donald Duck, because Donald Duck
doesn't get believed as a name.
Can you talk like Donald Duck?
No, I cannot talk like Donald Duck.
Never could.
- My name is Robin Williams,
and I've been living with that name almost 21 years.
When people start to say,
"Robin Williams, Robin Williams,"
and I realized that, okay,
I'm gonna have a problem with this name.
And I still do, but it's a good problem,
and I'm proud of that name.
- Well, it's been a lot of fun. Let's put it that way.
The name is definitely different.
I got it when I was about seven years old.
There was a famous baseball player named
Dusty Rhodes who helped win the World Series
for, at the time, the New York Giants.
And I was a scrappy little tomboy.
My Christian name was Susan. How boring is that?
- In the mid 90's,
I took all of my employees to Florida for a week.
When we got to the airport,
security was maxed out and they were waiting for us.
My secretary ran up to us,
and she said, "These people are going nuts.
"They think you're the famous Paul McCartney."
A few minutes later, a big shot from airport security
looks up and says,
"Ramp way's clear, Mr. McCartney.
"Your party may now board." The entire bunch of us
were put right up in the front of the plane,
and my momma didn't raise a fool.
I wasn't going to say, "Excuse me, I paid for coach."
We got to Disney, and our rooms were upgraded.
I believe the entire trip was a success
just because of my name.
- I received calls from a few different casting agents
that were randomly searchin' for people with unique names.
They offered to pay to come out to California
to be interviewed, and we got out there.
And sure enough, in my hotel
there was an army of Ronald McDonalds.
So they picked us up in a long van,
5:00 in the morning and start driving.
- [Conductor] All aboard!
- [Ronald] Well, suddenly, we don't know where we are.
It's an hour out from L.A.,
so we start thinking, you know,
he could be driving us into Mexico.
We'd be sold into servitude.
Eventually, we came to where they were gonna film,
and at that point, told us that they were
introducing Taco Bell's new breakfasts,
and it wasn't until a couple weeks later
that we discovered that I was in the first commercial.
- My name is Ronald McDonald. - [Heckler] You're who?!
- I am Ronald McDonald.
- I'm Ronald McDonald, Jr.,
and this is Ronald McDonald III.
- My name is Ronald McDonald.
- [Interviewer] What do you think? - That's really good.
- I was surprised how good it is.
- I love the new AM Crunch Wrap. - I'm Ronald McDonald.
- Ronald. - McDonald.
- [All] I'm Ronald McDonald and I love
Taco Bell's new breakfast.
- [Narrator] People with interesting names often
have unlisted phone numbers to avoid pranksters.
[busy signal drones]
- We used to get all kinds of calls in the middle
of the night asking if Igor was home,
or is the Monster there.
And when we answered the call,
we thought that people were nuts
and having a party and drinking and teenagers
just out late and having a good time.
When Shelley came up with that book,
that ruined our good name.
That book.
After a while, you just grin and bear it.
And sometimes you say,
"You stupid so-and-so,"
and... let it go.
- Even though my mother's name wasn't Ronald McDonald,
they knew I lived there,
so we would get kids calling late at night, you know,
asking for cheeseburgers.
- [Narrator] Unfortunately, their understandable wariness
might also extend to filmmakers
who call them out of the blue.
[beep tones]
[phone rings]
- Hi, is this a Daniel Doom?
- Hi, is Harold Rude in, please?
- I'm trying to find Francis Mangina.
- Are you sure it's Mangina?
Can I say Mangeena? - [Co-Worker] No!
- Your name is very unusual,
and there's a lot of history behind it.
[exasperated breathing]
[dial tone]
- We had flagged your name.
- This is nerve-wracking.
- Do have any forwarding information?
- [Recording] If you know your party's extension,
you may dial at any time.
[recorded wait tunes play]
- All right, you too. Have a nice day.
- [Narrator] An amazing discovery we made
is how lightly the Clutzes, Putzes, and Boggises
of the world wear the so-called burden of their names.
It seems that like a lot of problems,
it's only as much of an issue as you allow it to be.
- I would go on dates,
and put my name in at a restaurant,
and I would spell it out C-R-A-Y-P-O,
and one time, the hostess looked at me and said,
"That's not how you spell it."
I told her, "That's how you're gonna pronounce it.
"I'm on a first date."
Very close uncle told me that you will know
when it's time to get married
if they're willing to take on the last name Crapo.
Then you've got someone that really cares for you.
- The fact that they develop a personality
from their name, I think, is special.
And then that you use it as a springboard to what's
becoming quick-witted or socially adaptable
to different situations,
and you gotta deal with people all the time,
and some people just like to bust balls.
And are you gonna crumble in that situation,
or are you gonna be able to stand strong?
My persona on stage is kind of a mean, nasty guy,
so people keep their mouth shut.
Humor's a great weapon.
You really gotta watch out for these old people driving.
They always have that excuse,
"Well, I mistook the gas pedal for the brake."
It's not like you're driving around in a piano.
There's only two pedals down there.
Pick one, Beethoven.
If you're driving a car,
and it suddenly accelerates into some people,
try the other pedal.
I mean, how many bodies have to flip over the hood
before you go, "Ohh, this isn't the brake"?
- I was teaching inner city
sixth, seventh, and eighth grade.
And I didn't want to put that name up there.
So I did not put Slutsky up there.
For some reason, I wrote Slotsky.
S-L-O-T-S-K-Y.
And I had no idea that I was gonna be in that school
for two years as a permanent substitute.
So I would go down the hall,
and they'd go, "Hello, Ms. Slotsky,"
and I'd go, "Hello!"
They never found out, thank goodness,
that my name was Slutsky.
I never would have lived that one down in that school.
- [Narrator] There's no doubt that having a name
like Boggis, Crapo, or Slutsky can be a challenge.
But now let's consider a worst-case scenario,
one that posed fundamental and serious questions
of personal identity and cultural imperialism...
[deep gasp]
while shocking the sensibilities
of basketball fans from Wyoming to Saskatchewan.
- My full, full name is,
I'll say it like in Portuguese.
[pronounces name]
If you look at my last name,
you're gonna say, wow, it's not Fook;
it's Fuck because in my whole life,
I said Fuck because it's F-U-C-K.
But where I come from,
it's not pronounced like that.
It's Fook or Fookie.
My grandmother's hometown is called Canoinhas.
Half of the city, pretty much,
people with my last name, F-U-C-K, live there.
My uncle's insurance company.
The name of the company is Fuck's Insurance.
Basketball changed my life,
and I played from 1999 until now.
I prepared a DVD,
put my name and my last name in it,
and then I sent it to my future coach.
- I first found out about Gui
when he was playing basketball,
going to school at Northwest College in Powell, Wyoming.
- When looking at the DVD,
especially my last name,
the coach just didn't accept.
Like it was like,
"I'm not looking at a DVD of a guy with his name." Like, are you kidding me?
Is this for real? Then he watched. He really liked my game,
and he offered me a scholarship.
- People started to realize that his last name
is spelled F-U-C-K.
There started to become questions.
- They have like the scoreboard,
and right beside, they have like the last name
of each player with the number showing to everybody.
So they were like,
"Um, I'm not gonna put like your F last name."
I was like, "Come on.
Just use my last name."
- In past generations, people who came to America
with a name that sounded really unusual or embarrassing
in English, would typically change it.
That has virtually disappeared over the past 50 years.
Today, people do want to keep their names,
keep their connection to their heritage,
even if that name raises some eyebrows.
- [Craig] Gui's proud of his heritage.
He's proud of his last name.
We didn't feel it was something we should take away from him.
So we just felt we should go with his full name.
- [Narrator] So what happened when they stopped
obsessing about Gui's name and just treated it
like anyone else's?
Whose problem was it that it had a sexual meaning
in just one of the 6,500 spoken languages in the world?
- In the first game of the second semester,
when they saw there on the scoreboard
my last last name,
they were like, "Oh, my God.
"Look at that. They finally put it."
Like they're giving you the pride, let's say.
- I think it's fantastic.
He's standing up for his family line,
his bloodline.
- [Craig] All it really did was just bring us closer together,
and knowing more about our teammate,
our family, and our brotherhood.
- You're too big. [laughter]
Fookie too big. Come on, Fookie.
- You're too skinny, come on!
- As in so much of life,
I think we all think the grass is greener
in terms of our own names.
Any John Jones is going to be a little bit envious
with someone with an usual name, and someone with a name
that they always have to spell a dozen times
is gonna be envious of John Jones.
- Having my last name in North America changed my life.
It feels awesome, of course. Like you feel important.
You feel like now people know you.
- My father was interviewed for a national newspaper
for schools when he was probably six or seven years old.
Apparently, it happened to be noticed
by someone at Disney.
Disney contacted my grandparents through a telegram,
and also sent a drawing from Disney itself.
- [Donald III] It's Donald Duck in a bed looking at a mirror
that he doesn't know in the dark at his eyes,
and takes a gun out and shoots the mirror,
and then turns the light on and see that he's
shot his mirror.
I thought it was really interesting
that it was drawn by Disney. I thought that was really cool.
- I went into the non-profit world
in raising money professionally.
I found that with a name like Smoki Bacon,
when I would talk to the person that
would direct me to the executive,
and I would say, you know,
"Just tell him that Smoki Bacon is calling,"
and they would say, "No, no, no.
"We don't want the name of the company.
"What is your name?"
And the person that I would be talking to
would start laughing and plug me into the executive.
It branded me before I realized
what branding was all about.
Now everybody is branding everything.
And I realized, oh, my God,
I branded myself several decades ago
with Smoki Bacon.
- I got a letter once in the mail,
and it was from a stadium in Soviet Georgia.
And evidently, the stadium had 50,000 seats,
but they clearly meant this letter
for the other Paul McCartney.
But a little part of me thought it would be kind of fun
to go over there and see if they knew the difference,
and maybe stand up on stage and sing,
"I'm A Little Teapot, Short and Stout,"
and see if I could entertain the people.
♪ Here is my handle
♪ Here is my spout
Two notes. Two notes.
- [loud piano note] - That is impressive.
But obviously, if I did that,
I'd probably be in a prison in Siberia right now.
- My husband and I were at Woodman's in Ipswich,
and we were walking around, and we saw Larry David,
and I looked up and there he was,
and I went, "Hello, Larry David.
"My name is Linda Slutsky."
The way I said my name was really funny.
Went I'm Linda Slutsky.
I just blurted it out that way.
I don't know why.
And he just came over like he was my best friend,
and started talking to me.
And it was really great,
because he wouldn't stop talking,
and then they were producing,
and his assistant kept saying,
"You have to go, Mr. David.
"You have to go." And he wouldn't go.
He just wanted to just keep talking to me.
- Well, my current girlfriend likes it
because she's named after a drink.
- All my whole life,
I always got not picked on,
but people would make jokes
and when I met Al, it wasn't like that.
It was always about his name.
A lot of people make jokes
about both of our names together,
'cause it's like a full meal.
He's the pasta, I'm the juice.
When we first met,
he actually told me he had a picture of the two of us,
and I couldn't remember a time that he,
we'd taken a picture together.
And he actually went to the grocery store,
and Sunny D was right next to the al dente pasta,
so we took a picture,
and that was our first picture together.
- You know, I think I was pulled over
for a speeding ticket at one time in my life,
and when I gave the license to the officer,
he looked at it,
and he was like, "Are you serious?"
And I said, "Yeah."
And he said, "It might be your lucky day today.
"I might just give you a warning because you're a Putz."
And I said, "I'll take it."
- I was glad that we could carry the name on.
That really made me happy.
- I would hope that I could name my son Donald Duck,
if we have children.
- And if I had a common name of Smith, Jones, Sullivan,
I don't mean to make fun of anybody's name,
but you know, I would probably be a little disappointed.
- Jeff Studley, that's a good name.
I think every male in this movie
probably wishes they had that name.
But then again, you gotta deliver.
Kinda like Linda Slutsky.
You know, they're expecting a little something
if they're out on a date with Studley.
As opposed to going out with Howard Schmuck.
You know, I think we're all a product of our environment.
Absolutely it's gonna shape you.
- Having the last name of Gay,
and experiencing that,
you know, kinda being picked on for a little while
for a few years has made me less prejudiced,
more understanding of other people.
- I hope this movie brings this issue out
more into society. I mean, I don't think
there's ever gonna be a Hall of Fame for us.
You know, maybe something like this
will prevent a lot of, more bullying
in the lives of these people.
- I think it's really important that it's brought to light,
because when people go around making fun of other people
for something that is really out of their control,
it can really affect somebody on a deeper level
that others probably wouldn't be aware of.
- [Narrator] So at the beginning of the film,
we posed a question.
When people ask, "Who are you?"
we answer with a name, but is that who we are?
After all the phone calls,
after all the interviews,
personally, I like the idea that a name
is not who we are, or what we are,
it's something we have.
It belongs to us,
so we can use it in any way we choose.
Many of the individuals that we've met
have made a conscious decision to use their names
in a way that enriches their lives,
both professionally and personally.
- My name led me to become a stand-up comic
and a humorist.
Much of it was embracing the peculiar aspect of the name.
People would often use that as a way to attack me.
But I found that as something that I use instead.
Outgoingness and positiveness instead of introversion.
- I don't need business cards anymore,
because everybody remembers my name.
- Got a lot of customers that I had met years ago
that either moved or had forgotten me,
and saw the commercials and remembered me.
- I look on it as an opportunity to be able
to make connections with people
that I would never have had the opportunity
to make connections with.
- It kind of opens me up.
It makes me more of a person.
It makes me more alive.
- It definitely made me a little bit
less sensitive as I got older.
- Drawing attention, frankly, to what I do,
which I think is important, and where I do it,
in a cancer center that's trying to develop new treatments.
I think the more attention to that, the better.
- I think it's great that they've come through it,
and become better people because of it.
- That's gonna build their self-confidence,
and provide them with a sense of strength
that they've made it through something
that's been really difficult for them.
- Every person should be proud of the name they have.
- I think, you know, you're pretty open to create
who you wanna be.
Your name really shouldn't define who you are.
- There is no single perfect name.
There's just the way that you take your name,
and turn it into your life.
- When you have an oddball name like I have,
if you do something good, you're remembered for it.
- I would recommend anybody out there
to change their name to Paul McCartney.
- It's an unusual name, yes.
But we have a lot of fun with it.
- My name is Cockburn.
The C and the K are, indeed, silent.
- I'm proud of my name.
It is what I am.
- I will have kids, and they will have my last name.
I don't care.
- Two to three times a week,
somebody says to me, "That's a great name.
I wish I had that name."
I would not change this name for anything in the world.
[upbeat bluesy rock music]
- [Automated voice] Please enjoy this Verizon
ring-back tone while your party is reached.
[classical music]
- I think this is public domain.
- [Ben] It started at an early age.
Kids were always starting to tease me.
It started with Ben Mangina,
and then it went to just Mangina.
And Mangina, I didn't know
that it had any reference to, you know,
any parts of the female anatomy.
I didn't really put two and two together
until I started getting more into middle school.
- And can you tell me how you introduce yourself?
- [Ben] Yeah, just hi, this is Ben Mangeena.
- Oh, I thought you said it was pronounced Mangina.
- [Ben] No, it's Mangeena.
- Oh, it's Mangeena. Okay.
- Can I say Mangeena? - [Co-Worker] No.
- [Ben] So it's been a lifelong correction for people.
My kids, I tell 'em that it's something
that they're gonna hear probably for the rest of their life,
and just not show other kids that it bothers them,
and then, that way, it'll start going away.
- Well, thank you so much for participating in this.
We really appreciate it.
- [Ben] Well, you're very welcome.
I'm glad I had the opportunity to do so.