1
00:00:32,434 --> 00:00:33,987
(PHONE RINGING)

2
00:00:37,021 --> 00:00:38,113
(CLEARS THROAT)

3
00:00:38,189 --> 00:00:39,910
<i>MAN: Hello?</i>
Tracey, it's Bradley.

4
00:00:39,983 --> 00:00:42,118
Bradley, where the
hell are you guys?

5
00:00:42,193 --> 00:00:43,914
I am freaking out!

6
00:00:43,987 --> 00:00:45,244
<i>BRADLEY: Listen.</i>

7
00:00:45,405 --> 00:00:46,912
We fucked up.

8
00:00:47,031 --> 00:00:49,001
What are you talking about?

9
00:00:49,075 --> 00:00:52,833
Me and Doug are about to get married and
I haven't heard from him in two days.

10
00:00:53,621 --> 00:00:56,255
Things got a little out of
control last night and we...

11
00:00:57,208 --> 00:00:58,762
We lost Doug.

12
00:00:58,835 --> 00:01:00,638
The wedding is in a few hours!

13
00:01:00,712 --> 00:01:01,756
In Santa Barbara?

14
00:01:01,838 --> 00:01:02,930
Yeah!

15
00:01:04,507 --> 00:01:06,762
That's not gonna happen.

16
00:01:25,904 --> 00:01:27,707
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

17
00:01:53,139 --> 00:01:56,147
Look, I know everyone's a little
miffed we couldn't do Vegas this year,

18
00:01:56,226 --> 00:01:59,239
but I'm telling you, Chief Loose
Slots is the next best thing.

19
00:01:59,312 --> 00:02:01,483
I don't care where we have
my bachelor party, guys.

20
00:02:01,564 --> 00:02:04,115
All that matters is that
we're celebrating together.

21
00:02:04,651 --> 00:02:06,371
And that we don't have AIDS.

22
00:02:07,487 --> 00:02:10,868
Anyway, I bet once you get
inside, it's not so bad.

23
00:02:18,581 --> 00:02:19,839
(BEEPS)

24
00:02:19,958 --> 00:02:21,346
All right!

25
00:02:25,463 --> 00:02:27,017
Hey, it's cute.

26
00:02:30,677 --> 00:02:33,690
I am honestly impressed
by how shitty this is.

27
00:02:34,180 --> 00:02:36,435
You don't even need a
blacklight to see all the stains.

28
00:02:36,766 --> 00:02:38,606
Maybe that's yogurt.

29
00:02:38,685 --> 00:02:42,113
Nah, it says right here in
the pamphlet, it is semen.

30
00:02:43,273 --> 00:02:45,444
Look, semen or no semen,

31
00:02:45,525 --> 00:02:47,660
the important thing is that Doug

32
00:02:48,069 --> 00:02:49,196
found his soulmate.

33
00:02:49,279 --> 00:02:50,406
DOUG: Thanks, man.

34
00:02:50,488 --> 00:02:52,161
Tracey just completes
in me, you know?

35
00:02:52,490 --> 00:02:54,044
Did you say, "Completes in you"?

36
00:02:54,117 --> 00:02:55,161
(GROANS)

37
00:02:55,243 --> 00:02:57,165
You know, that reminds
of the love shared

38
00:02:57,245 --> 00:02:59,131
between Peeta and
Katniss in <i>The...</i>

39
00:02:59,205 --> 00:03:01,424
I'm gonna need you to stop
talking about that book.

40
00:03:01,499 --> 00:03:04,548
No, I will not stop
talking about a novel

41
00:03:04,627 --> 00:03:09,633
that blogcritics.org/reviews
said was "a page-turner."

42
00:03:09,716 --> 00:03:11,388
Have you even read it?

43
00:03:11,468 --> 00:03:13,307
I'd love to, man.
It's just hard to find time

44
00:03:13,386 --> 00:03:15,225
to enrol in 7th grade
and cut off my nuts.

45
00:03:16,222 --> 00:03:20,564
Well then, maybe I'll find it hard
to find time to share my goodies.

46
00:03:20,727 --> 00:03:23,230
Oh, nice.
What do you got in there?

47
00:03:23,313 --> 00:03:25,234
I've got all kinds of fun stuff.

48
00:03:25,315 --> 00:03:28,447
I have Chernobyl potato vodka,

49
00:03:29,694 --> 00:03:31,165
standard-issue roofies,

50
00:03:32,113 --> 00:03:34,581
I've got Chinese black tar heroin,

51
00:03:35,325 --> 00:03:38,338
I've got drug mule
rectum-release opium,

52
00:03:39,454 --> 00:03:42,337
and some plug-in
air fresheners.

53
00:03:42,415 --> 00:03:43,626
How did that get in here?

54
00:03:44,042 --> 00:03:46,213
All right.
You got any bath salts?

55
00:03:46,294 --> 00:03:47,421
Tons.
Help yourself.

56
00:03:47,504 --> 00:03:50,221
I've also got skunk,
scoot, snap, flippers,

57
00:03:50,298 --> 00:03:53,181
flappers, floppers,
uppers, downers,

58
00:03:53,259 --> 00:03:55,229
and cyanide chewables.

59
00:03:55,303 --> 00:03:57,522
Cyanide?
Poison is the best.

60
00:03:57,639 --> 00:04:00,189
Hey! Those are my fun-time candies!

61
00:04:00,266 --> 00:04:01,440
No. Uh-uh.

62
00:04:01,518 --> 00:04:04,732
Every time we go out, we end up
blacked out and looking for somebody.

63
00:04:04,813 --> 00:04:08,194
Vegas. Thailand.
My nephew Ruben's Bar Mitzvah.

64
00:04:08,608 --> 00:04:10,411
Whatever, we got him back
in time for the service.

65
00:04:10,485 --> 00:04:12,905
Yeah, and then he puked
all over the Torah.

66
00:04:13,321 --> 00:04:14,792
(CHUCKLES)
Classic.

67
00:04:14,906 --> 00:04:16,329
No, not classic.
That is a holy document.

68
00:04:16,408 --> 00:04:17,618
(GROANS)

69
00:04:18,076 --> 00:04:21,173
All right, let's just get Zach
dressed and head to the roof.

70
00:04:21,663 --> 00:04:22,873
Dressed?

71
00:04:35,260 --> 00:04:37,894
Small request, you guys. Could
somebody scratch my nuts?

72
00:04:37,971 --> 00:04:40,023
I respectfully decline.

73
00:04:40,765 --> 00:04:42,355
Non-alcoholic beer?

74
00:04:42,517 --> 00:04:44,107
I told you.
No risks tonight.

75
00:04:44,185 --> 00:04:45,396
Pussy!

76
00:04:46,688 --> 00:04:49,701
Excuse me, I was
calling you a pussy.

77
00:04:49,941 --> 00:04:50,985
All right.

78
00:04:51,276 --> 00:04:52,866
Let's put our shitty rehab beers up

79
00:04:52,986 --> 00:04:55,038
and toast Doug and Tracey.

80
00:04:55,572 --> 00:04:59,000
I never thought your soulmate would
have an Adam's apple and a penis,

81
00:04:59,075 --> 00:05:01,626
but, hey, life's a journey, I guess.

82
00:05:01,703 --> 00:05:02,877
We're happy for you, man.

83
00:05:03,747 --> 00:05:05,218
Thanks, guys.

84
00:05:05,331 --> 00:05:06,838
To Doug and Tracey.

85
00:05:06,916 --> 00:05:08,090
BOTH: To Doug and Tracey.

86
00:05:08,209 --> 00:05:12,558
And to a night we'll never forget.

87
00:05:17,218 --> 00:05:19,140
Those look really good.

88
00:05:19,721 --> 00:05:22,105
Could you just pour it in my cone?

89
00:06:05,725 --> 00:06:07,066
(GROANS)

90
00:06:10,105 --> 00:06:11,944
What the fuck?

91
00:06:12,607 --> 00:06:13,995
Oh, God.

92
00:06:17,320 --> 00:06:18,743
(GROANING)

93
00:06:22,617 --> 00:06:23,744
What?

94
00:06:25,787 --> 00:06:28,337
Scuba guy on the ceiling.
That makes sense.

95
00:06:28,623 --> 00:06:29,667
Watch out!

96
00:06:29,958 --> 00:06:31,132
Jesus!

97
00:06:31,626 --> 00:06:33,465
You stepped on my balls, dude.

98
00:06:33,545 --> 00:06:34,802
Sorry.

99
00:06:35,088 --> 00:06:36,891
Where the hell are we?

100
00:06:38,341 --> 00:06:40,014
Fuck if I know.

101
00:06:40,760 --> 00:06:44,640
All I know is I am hungover
as shit right now.

102
00:06:45,223 --> 00:06:47,275
I think I'm legally dead.

103
00:06:47,976 --> 00:06:50,111
And my mouth tastes assy.

104
00:06:50,311 --> 00:06:52,067
Please tell me I ate cheese.

105
00:06:53,356 --> 00:06:55,860
I don't know.
My ass kind of hurts.

106
00:06:56,651 --> 00:06:58,158
Oh, no!
Did I do cocaine?

107
00:06:58,737 --> 00:07:01,205
I'm deathly allergic to cocaine.

108
00:07:01,823 --> 00:07:03,793
And I'm allergic to gluten.

109
00:07:04,534 --> 00:07:06,586
ED: I hope that's gluten-free.

110
00:07:06,661 --> 00:07:07,753
Oh, no.

111
00:07:08,037 --> 00:07:10,090
Did we kill Waldo last night?

112
00:07:12,041 --> 00:07:13,085
Um...

113
00:07:13,168 --> 00:07:14,758
Maybe he was fucked to death.

114
00:07:15,211 --> 00:07:16,504
(GAGGING)

115
00:07:17,464 --> 00:07:18,965
(IN SING-SONG VOICE)
Morning, fellas!

116
00:07:19,382 --> 00:07:22,099
Oh, god damn it, who let Zach
out of the straitjacket?

117
00:07:22,177 --> 00:07:24,645
Is that a man-thong?

118
00:07:24,721 --> 00:07:27,307
No, it's a regular thong.
I wear them all the time.

119
00:07:27,849 --> 00:07:28,976
That's disgusting.
(GAGGING)

120
00:07:29,017 --> 00:07:31,698
Okay, we need to find Doug
and get the hell out of here.

121
00:07:31,770 --> 00:07:34,106
Somebody call him.
Where's my phone?

122
00:07:34,189 --> 00:07:37,535
Oh, holy shit.
Is this a rocket launcher?

123
00:07:38,193 --> 00:07:39,236
BRADLEY: Zach?

124
00:07:39,944 --> 00:07:40,988
Dude!

125
00:07:41,071 --> 00:07:42,328
Come on, we have to find Doug.

126
00:07:42,697 --> 00:07:44,085
But that was...

127
00:07:46,117 --> 00:07:49,546
Oh, my. Gentlemen,
this is quite a mess.

128
00:07:50,371 --> 00:07:54,797
Okay, this is awkward, but I'm
just gonna go ahead and ask,

129
00:07:55,126 --> 00:07:56,799
maid or hooker?

130
00:07:56,878 --> 00:08:00,674
Manners! That is no way
to speak to your escort.

131
00:08:01,174 --> 00:08:03,808
I always ask.
The answer's always the same.

132
00:08:04,928 --> 00:08:08,724
It's been real nice talking to
you, but we're just gonna go.

133
00:08:10,892 --> 00:08:12,019
I wouldn't do that.

134
00:08:12,143 --> 00:08:13,235
Okay.

135
00:08:14,729 --> 00:08:15,773
(SCREAMING)

136
00:08:19,567 --> 00:08:21,572
We're on a fucking train?

137
00:08:22,362 --> 00:08:23,655
I knew it!

138
00:08:23,738 --> 00:08:25,826
That means you're Effie Trinket!

139
00:08:25,907 --> 00:08:27,544
No, my name is Effing.

140
00:08:27,617 --> 00:08:30,749
And the three of you
are on your way to the Games.

141
00:08:30,829 --> 00:08:33,083
We discussed this all after
your courageous gesture.

142
00:08:34,040 --> 00:08:38,170
EFFING: Why don't you look at your phone?
(CHATTER ON VIDEO)

143
00:08:39,087 --> 00:08:42,100
<i>Fucking Reaping, bitches!</i>

144
00:08:42,715 --> 00:08:43,807
ED: Oh, that's my phone.

145
00:08:45,260 --> 00:08:46,351
Let me see it.

146
00:08:46,428 --> 00:08:48,682
Doug's trying to kiss me again!

147
00:08:48,763 --> 00:08:50,186
Doug, how you doing, buddy?

148
00:08:50,265 --> 00:08:52,436
Fucking Reaping, bitches!

149
00:08:52,517 --> 00:08:53,691
(ALL WHOOPING)

150
00:08:53,977 --> 00:08:56,029
<i>The first name of the girl...</i>

151
00:08:56,104 --> 00:08:57,492
Why is Lady Gaga on the screen?

152
00:08:57,605 --> 00:08:58,993
<i>And a happy Games goes to...</i>

153
00:08:59,065 --> 00:09:00,619
Change the channel!

154
00:09:00,692 --> 00:09:02,245
<i>...young Boo!</i>

155
00:09:03,069 --> 00:09:04,706
(BOOING)
<i>And now for the boys.</i>

156
00:09:04,779 --> 00:09:06,500
I volunteer!

157
00:09:07,949 --> 00:09:11,128
We volunteer for
the Hungover Games!

158
00:09:11,327 --> 00:09:13,463
<i>EFFING:
What a wonderful development!</i>

159
00:09:14,122 --> 00:09:17,753
<i>Three of our brave volunteers
to add to the race.</i>

160
00:09:18,293 --> 00:09:21,223
<i>May the chances be
ever in your comer.</i>

161
00:09:21,296 --> 00:09:24,345
Attica! Attica!

162
00:09:24,507 --> 00:09:26,097
Okay, Okay.

163
00:09:26,176 --> 00:09:27,350
Hey!

164
00:09:27,844 --> 00:09:28,936
Oh!

165
00:09:29,262 --> 00:09:30,306
(LAUGHING)
Okay.

166
00:09:30,388 --> 00:09:32,689
Will you keep it down?

167
00:09:33,183 --> 00:09:35,437
I can hardly hear myself drink.

168
00:09:35,685 --> 00:09:37,239
Haymitch!

169
00:09:37,771 --> 00:09:41,199
That's not my name,
you scruffy half-tard.

170
00:09:42,108 --> 00:09:44,279
It's Justmitch.

171
00:09:44,360 --> 00:09:47,789
Look, I'm enjoying all of this.

172
00:09:47,864 --> 00:09:49,205
I really am.

173
00:09:49,282 --> 00:09:51,418
Especially that
little blonde schoolgirl

174
00:09:51,534 --> 00:09:53,705
situation you've got
going on right there.

175
00:09:53,870 --> 00:09:55,922
But right now we
really just need to

176
00:09:56,039 --> 00:09:58,126
find our friend and be on our way.

177
00:10:00,668 --> 00:10:04,465
The Sponsors will eat that
bromance shit up with a spoon.

178
00:10:04,798 --> 00:10:06,388
Speaking of which.

179
00:10:07,050 --> 00:10:10,348
Okay, let me guess, now you're gonna
tell us how to win the Games?

180
00:10:12,347 --> 00:10:16,108
If you wanna live long enough to
find your pansy little friend,

181
00:10:16,226 --> 00:10:18,112
you'd best learn to listen to me.

182
00:10:20,355 --> 00:10:23,202
If there's two things
I know, it's hangovers

183
00:10:23,733 --> 00:10:25,619
and murdering for sport.

184
00:10:26,403 --> 00:10:28,953
And, hey, if you're lucky enough,

185
00:10:29,072 --> 00:10:32,251
one of y'all might
get out of here alive.

186
00:10:33,326 --> 00:10:35,580
Did you just say "one" of us?
Mm-hmm.

187
00:10:35,745 --> 00:10:39,339
Now if you'll excuse me,
I gotta find a vein.

188
00:10:46,756 --> 00:10:49,093
<i>WOMAN ON TV:
You're watching Capitol Sports.</i>

189
00:10:50,093 --> 00:10:51,932
Skip, it's my favourite time
of the year.

190
00:10:53,221 --> 00:10:56,852
The weather is warming, the
tig ol' bitties is coming out

191
00:10:56,933 --> 00:11:00,279
and right now, it's time
for the Hungover Games!

192
00:11:00,353 --> 00:11:02,026
A great competition
shaping up this year.

193
00:11:02,105 --> 00:11:04,525
Contestants from
the Superheroes District

194
00:11:04,607 --> 00:11:07,787
<i>and the Middle Earth District are
once again among the favourites.</i>

195
00:11:07,861 --> 00:11:11,123
<i>The Puppet District and the Depp
District are particularly intriguing to</i>

196
00:11:11,197 --> 00:11:12,621
<i>Stephen A. Timplesmith.</i>

197
00:11:13,074 --> 00:11:15,243
Johnny Depp. Is there any
weirdo this guy won't play?

198
00:11:15,285 --> 00:11:16,328
Straight freak!

199
00:11:16,411 --> 00:11:19,543
<i>Next up, we have The Real
Housewives of District 8.</i>

200
00:11:19,622 --> 00:11:22,470
Now these trashy bitches

201
00:11:22,542 --> 00:11:25,472
have about a 0% chance
of surviving the Games.

202
00:11:25,628 --> 00:11:27,716
White girls!
Got me one at home.

203
00:11:27,797 --> 00:11:30,301
Next up, we've got
the Django District.

204
00:11:31,217 --> 00:11:34,231
Now Django is tough, but let's
get this straight, Skip.

205
00:11:34,304 --> 00:11:37,436
He will never be LeBron.

206
00:11:37,682 --> 00:11:38,940
Now, on the Django team

207
00:11:39,017 --> 00:11:42,564
we have famed plantation
owner, Calvin Dandy.

208
00:11:42,645 --> 00:11:44,816
Ironically, he's a good
friend of mine.

209
00:11:46,024 --> 00:11:49,073
All right, next up we have the
Gratuitous Nudity District.

210
00:11:49,152 --> 00:11:50,659
Dizzamn!

211
00:11:51,112 --> 00:11:54,126
Everybody knows you cannot
make entertainment like this

212
00:11:54,199 --> 00:11:57,580
without some inexplicable,
unwarranted nudity.

213
00:11:57,660 --> 00:12:01,089
And finally our field is rounded
out by our outlying districts.

214
00:12:01,164 --> 00:12:03,335
<i>AUTOMATED VOICE: District 9, Avatar.</i>

215
00:12:03,666 --> 00:12:05,672
<i>District 10, Horror.</i>

216
00:12:06,336 --> 00:12:08,886
<i>District 11, Katnip Everlean.</i>

217
00:12:09,047 --> 00:12:11,467
<i>District 12, The Hungover Guys.</i>

218
00:12:11,549 --> 00:12:14,017
Hey! That looks like us and Doug!

219
00:12:15,345 --> 00:12:18,773
Look, we've got about
48 hours to find him

220
00:12:18,848 --> 00:12:20,853
and get him back to that wedding.

221
00:12:20,934 --> 00:12:22,191
Okay.

222
00:12:22,519 --> 00:12:24,855
I guess it's time for us
to kill some motherfuckers.

223
00:12:24,979 --> 00:12:26,023
(GIGGLES)

224
00:12:36,616 --> 00:12:38,953
WOMAN: All right, I need three
to run this drill. Let's go!

225
00:12:39,035 --> 00:12:41,005
I have the power!

226
00:12:41,204 --> 00:12:42,248
Come on, cunt.

227
00:12:42,539 --> 00:12:45,422
Oh, foo. Another year,
another murder.

228
00:12:45,625 --> 00:12:49,053
What a crop of freakazoids.

229
00:12:49,212 --> 00:12:50,849
(GRUNTING)

230
00:12:52,048 --> 00:12:53,306
Stop swinging that in my face.

231
00:12:53,383 --> 00:12:54,890
That is dangerous.
That is not a toy!

232
00:12:55,051 --> 00:12:57,056
Zach, will you stop? You're
making us look like idiots.

233
00:12:57,220 --> 00:13:00,103
No, Mr I Can't Even
Pick Up This Boulder.

234
00:13:00,181 --> 00:13:01,569
(YELLING)

235
00:13:06,229 --> 00:13:08,614
You're making us look bad
in front of the Sponsors.

236
00:13:08,690 --> 00:13:10,410
Why are they all dressed like that?

237
00:13:10,608 --> 00:13:13,242
Looks like a Lady Gaga
family reunion.

238
00:13:14,112 --> 00:13:15,784
Look, you see that?

239
00:13:16,281 --> 00:13:18,535
Our odds are pretty
shitty right now.

240
00:13:18,616 --> 00:13:20,785
ED: Hey, why do the puppets
have better odds than us?

241
00:13:28,251 --> 00:13:29,961
Go ahead and cross
check your information.

242
00:13:31,045 --> 00:13:33,264
Excuse me. Sorry, I hate
to bother you with this,

243
00:13:33,339 --> 00:13:35,641
but my friend is stuck.

244
00:13:42,807 --> 00:13:44,314
<i>World War Z, right?</i>

245
00:13:44,392 --> 00:13:46,029
<i>No. Walking Dead, actually.</i>

246
00:13:46,311 --> 00:13:48,067
Oh, right, right.
You were the one that bit

247
00:13:48,188 --> 00:13:50,148
that guy's ear and then
ate his face off, right?

248
00:13:50,356 --> 00:13:51,614
Guilty.

249
00:13:52,567 --> 00:13:54,904
So who else came
from your district?

250
00:13:55,278 --> 00:13:58,493
Just that crazy blood-covered
bitch over there.

251
00:13:59,032 --> 00:14:01,037
She scares the shit out of me.

252
00:14:01,117 --> 00:14:02,410
I can see why.

253
00:14:06,706 --> 00:14:10,966
Wow. Kaptain Kazakhstan is
really rocking that burlap sack.

254
00:14:11,169 --> 00:14:13,886
Look at the size of
those Oompa Loompas.

255
00:14:13,963 --> 00:14:15,256
You're welcome.

256
00:14:15,340 --> 00:14:17,926
That's quite a bit of
shrubbery he has down there.

257
00:14:18,009 --> 00:14:20,477
Can you say,
"Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia"?

258
00:14:21,387 --> 00:14:23,309
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

259
00:14:32,148 --> 00:14:33,240
Listen.

260
00:14:33,483 --> 00:14:35,570
They're looking at you
like you're a meal.

261
00:14:36,069 --> 00:14:39,034
Especially that flamboyant
Scandinavian guy.

262
00:14:39,114 --> 00:14:40,241
Ew.

263
00:14:40,323 --> 00:14:43,502
He wants to roll you in
sugar like a dick churro.

264
00:14:44,160 --> 00:14:45,833
So what am I supposed to do?

265
00:14:45,954 --> 00:14:48,374
They need to know
that you can take a punch.

266
00:14:48,957 --> 00:14:50,048
What?

267
00:14:50,250 --> 00:14:52,219
Yeah. Trust me.

268
00:14:57,424 --> 00:14:58,551
Okay.

269
00:15:00,093 --> 00:15:01,137
(GROANING)

270
00:15:01,719 --> 00:15:02,811
(GIGGLING)

271
00:15:03,388 --> 00:15:04,978
Okay, I'm good.

272
00:15:05,056 --> 00:15:06,349
All right, I'm good.

273
00:15:08,226 --> 00:15:11,109
The elbow didn't count.
Come on, come on.

274
00:15:11,187 --> 00:15:13,773
Now, just remember, this hurts
you more than it hurts me.

275
00:15:13,857 --> 00:15:14,948
(GRUNTS)

276
00:15:15,275 --> 00:15:16,366
(LAUGHING)

277
00:15:17,402 --> 00:15:18,576
Why, dude? Why?

278
00:15:18,653 --> 00:15:21,370
I don't know. I forgot why
we're even doing this.

279
00:15:22,282 --> 00:15:23,753
(ED GROANING)

280
00:15:24,659 --> 00:15:26,130
I'm pooped.

281
00:15:26,202 --> 00:15:28,338
I want a vitamin water
or something.

282
00:15:28,788 --> 00:15:30,129
Not bad.

283
00:15:31,708 --> 00:15:33,345
That means I need a vitamin water!

284
00:15:33,418 --> 00:15:36,099
Okay, okay, I'll get it!
I'll get a vitamin water for you!

285
00:15:40,341 --> 00:15:41,765
Not again.

286
00:15:43,261 --> 00:15:44,305
(GRUNTING)

287
00:15:53,897 --> 00:15:55,569
My right nut is numb.

288
00:15:56,149 --> 00:15:57,869
I can take a hit, Zach.

289
00:15:59,235 --> 00:16:00,707
I can give one, too.

290
00:16:00,779 --> 00:16:02,369
You ready for the thunder?

291
00:16:02,447 --> 00:16:03,918
Well, here's the lightning!

292
00:16:04,157 --> 00:16:06,079
Oh, son of a hooker, that hurt!

293
00:16:06,159 --> 00:16:07,452
Hey, watch it!

294
00:16:07,577 --> 00:16:08,835
Sorry, I didn't see anything,
I swear to God!

295
00:16:08,912 --> 00:16:10,502
My elbow may have grazed...
Ed.

296
00:16:12,165 --> 00:16:13,422
Hey...

297
00:16:14,167 --> 00:16:15,259
Okay.

298
00:16:16,461 --> 00:16:17,505
Uh...

299
00:16:17,587 --> 00:16:19,307
How are you?

300
00:16:19,589 --> 00:16:21,262
Hey...
Hi.

301
00:16:21,466 --> 00:16:22,558
...you.

302
00:16:23,760 --> 00:16:24,804
Oh.

303
00:16:25,136 --> 00:16:26,429
You don't remember me.

304
00:16:27,388 --> 00:16:28,729
It's Katnip.

305
00:16:28,807 --> 00:16:30,479
Katnip Everlean.

306
00:16:31,851 --> 00:16:34,402
I'm sorry. It's just
that last night, we...

307
00:16:34,479 --> 00:16:35,487
You were wasted.

308
00:16:35,563 --> 00:16:36,690
Yeah.

309
00:16:37,148 --> 00:16:39,367
You guys bought us drinks
after the Reaping.

310
00:16:39,442 --> 00:16:42,906
You said you were going
district-hopping, and you up and left.

311
00:16:43,279 --> 00:16:46,376
Jeez! You guys clearly have
a drinking problem!

312
00:16:46,825 --> 00:16:49,293
Um, is that a talking bird?

313
00:16:49,369 --> 00:16:52,050
I'm a talking jay, you birdbrain.

314
00:16:52,122 --> 00:16:53,794
For a nerd, you're pretty dumb.

315
00:16:53,873 --> 00:16:56,424
Sorry. He's really nice
once you get to know him.

316
00:16:56,501 --> 00:16:58,423
Yeah, just ask your mom.

317
00:16:58,503 --> 00:16:59,844
That's rude.

318
00:16:59,921 --> 00:17:02,389
Go away. How are you
feeling, by the way?

319
00:17:02,715 --> 00:17:05,433
Well, besides the raging hangover,

320
00:17:05,510 --> 00:17:07,597
the free-for-all
death match coming up,

321
00:17:07,679 --> 00:17:10,776
and the shit taste I can't
get out of my mouth,

322
00:17:11,599 --> 00:17:13,854
I'm actually doing great.

323
00:17:14,060 --> 00:17:16,314
Hey, look, it's Dumb
and Dumberer.

324
00:17:16,896 --> 00:17:19,198
A talking jay.

325
00:17:19,274 --> 00:17:21,326
So elegant.

326
00:17:25,613 --> 00:17:27,749
Hey, get your mitts off me!

327
00:17:27,824 --> 00:17:30,374
Where'd you go to school,
Penn State?

328
00:17:33,037 --> 00:17:34,509
Wow, okay, yeah.

329
00:17:34,581 --> 00:17:36,965
I'm not even gonna try to
process that right now.

330
00:17:37,041 --> 00:17:38,465
Excuse me?

331
00:17:39,085 --> 00:17:40,925
It's Katnip, Bradley.
We met last night.

332
00:17:41,004 --> 00:17:42,131
Yeah, Bradley.

333
00:17:42,213 --> 00:17:45,061
Yeah, right, okay.
About last night,

334
00:17:45,175 --> 00:17:48,223
do you have any idea what
happened to our friend, Doug?

335
00:17:48,595 --> 00:17:49,686
Uh...

336
00:17:49,763 --> 00:17:53,440
(LAUGHING) No. But I did wake up today
and I saw you all volunteered.

337
00:17:53,767 --> 00:17:55,854
That was really brave of you.

338
00:17:56,060 --> 00:17:57,614
That is one word for it.

339
00:17:57,687 --> 00:18:01,244
No, seriously. You guys were talking about
it so much you inspired me to do it.

340
00:18:01,316 --> 00:18:03,950
That's why I took my
little sister's place.

341
00:18:04,778 --> 00:18:06,913
That was stupid.
Sorry.

342
00:18:07,530 --> 00:18:09,452
You have a little sister?

343
00:18:09,824 --> 00:18:13,418
Is she into husky bearded guys with
low-level personality disorders?

344
00:18:13,703 --> 00:18:15,257
(YELLING)

345
00:18:15,789 --> 00:18:16,916
Nice!

346
00:18:17,082 --> 00:18:18,173
I like this girl.

347
00:18:18,249 --> 00:18:20,219
That got more hand than apple.

348
00:18:20,293 --> 00:18:21,930
(BUZZER RINGS)

349
00:18:22,420 --> 00:18:25,766
Attention, battlers,
battlers, battlers.

350
00:18:25,840 --> 00:18:28,973
The training centre is now closed.

351
00:18:29,135 --> 00:18:31,354
It is time to die.

352
00:18:31,471 --> 00:18:33,108
Make that work.

353
00:18:33,556 --> 00:18:36,605
That's my catchphrase,
you know. "Make that work."

354
00:18:38,144 --> 00:18:40,114
WOMAN: Hello?
A little help here?

355
00:18:44,359 --> 00:18:45,616
AUTOMATED VOICE: 20, 19, 18,

356
00:18:45,693 --> 00:18:47,284
<i>17,</i>

357
00:18:47,445 --> 00:18:48,786
<i>16,</i>

358
00:18:49,155 --> 00:18:50,366
<i>15,</i>

359
00:18:50,573 --> 00:18:52,045
<i>14...</i>

360
00:18:52,117 --> 00:18:54,702
Doug! Dougie!
Doug man!

361
00:18:56,413 --> 00:18:57,623
Doug? Doug?

362
00:18:57,705 --> 00:18:58,963
Doug!

363
00:19:00,166 --> 00:19:01,638
Doug? Where are you, man?

364
00:19:01,709 --> 00:19:03,465
Where the fuck is he?

365
00:19:04,629 --> 00:19:05,756
Doug?
Doug?

366
00:19:08,383 --> 00:19:09,936
Was that him?

367
00:19:12,262 --> 00:19:14,481
Hey, sweetheart.

368
00:19:14,556 --> 00:19:17,735
Looking for a white guy,
yea high, generic, unfunny,

369
00:19:17,809 --> 00:19:20,822
really forgettable.
Was that him right now?

370
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:24,283
Come on, talk to me.

371
00:19:26,443 --> 00:19:28,115
She's a goddamn
mute or something.

372
00:19:28,194 --> 00:19:29,368
Man, fuck you, white boy.

373
00:19:30,989 --> 00:19:32,377
What are you guys doing here?

374
00:19:32,449 --> 00:19:34,952
You need to get to
your tube room immediately.

375
00:19:35,034 --> 00:19:38,001
Okay, you don't have to manhandle me!
Oh. my tea!

376
00:19:39,414 --> 00:19:43,424
You just got bubble tea
all over my control panel.

377
00:19:43,835 --> 00:19:45,555
Get him out of here!

378
00:19:45,962 --> 00:19:47,054
<i>16,</i>

379
00:19:47,380 --> 00:19:48,472
<i>15,</i>

380
00:19:48,548 --> 00:19:49,805
<i>14,</i>

381
00:19:49,883 --> 00:19:51,093
13,
(LIFT CLANGS)

382
00:19:51,176 --> 00:19:52,219
<i>12...</i>

383
00:19:52,302 --> 00:19:54,722
Jeez, guys.
Portion control much?

384
00:19:55,555 --> 00:19:56,647
<i>9,</i>

385
00:19:57,182 --> 00:19:58,273
<i>8,</i>

386
00:19:58,349 --> 00:19:59,524
<i>7,</i>

387
00:19:59,684 --> 00:20:00,858
<i>6,</i>

388
00:20:00,935 --> 00:20:02,027
<i>5,</i>

389
00:20:02,520 --> 00:20:03,612
<i>4,</i>

390
00:20:03,813 --> 00:20:04,905
<i>3,</i>

391
00:20:05,398 --> 00:20:06,525
<i>2,</i>

392
00:20:06,733 --> 00:20:07,825
<i>1.</i>

393
00:20:13,073 --> 00:20:16,205
No, no, no! Don't step off
the platform, we'll explode!

394
00:20:17,035 --> 00:20:18,292
Oh, God.

395
00:20:18,578 --> 00:20:19,670
Oh, God.

396
00:20:27,045 --> 00:20:30,307
<i>MAN OVER PA: Now the contestants
line up before the Pornucopia,</i>

397
00:20:30,381 --> 00:20:32,802
<i>no doubt picking out the
weapons they wanna grab.</i>

398
00:20:32,884 --> 00:20:36,396
Doug, Doug, come on, man.
Where are you?

399
00:20:36,763 --> 00:20:38,685
He must be on the other side
of that tent full of...

400
00:20:38,765 --> 00:20:41,233
What are those?
Sex weapons?

401
00:20:41,476 --> 00:20:43,398
ED: Where the fuck are we?

402
00:20:44,062 --> 00:20:45,901
<i>MAN:
This is a great time to mention</i>

403
00:20:46,064 --> 00:20:47,903
<i>that the weaponry
has been provided by</i>

404
00:20:47,982 --> 00:20:51,115
<i>Delta Venus, Queen of the Sex Toys.</i>

405
00:20:51,820 --> 00:20:53,457
(DRUMS POUNDING)

406
00:21:04,082 --> 00:21:06,336
Let the killing begin!

407
00:21:10,422 --> 00:21:13,049
Shit, come on! Maybe we can find
him before he gets slaughtered.

408
00:21:13,508 --> 00:21:15,595
I got this.
Yeah.

409
00:21:16,845 --> 00:21:18,647
Fuck! My hammie!
I should've stretched!

410
00:21:18,972 --> 00:21:21,273
Oh, I should've stretched first!

411
00:21:21,808 --> 00:21:23,730
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

412
00:21:27,564 --> 00:21:28,655
Yeah!

413
00:21:34,362 --> 00:21:36,284
Holy cow. White wine!
I hate white wine!

414
00:21:50,128 --> 00:21:51,765
Okay, barrel roll!

415
00:21:52,088 --> 00:21:53,381
BRADLEY: Shit, really?
Are you all right?

416
00:21:53,465 --> 00:21:55,676
At least tell me that looked awesome.
Yeah. Sure.

417
00:21:59,304 --> 00:22:02,317
Oh, it's a red man.
High five?

418
00:22:02,390 --> 00:22:04,395
No? How about this?

419
00:22:05,143 --> 00:22:06,484
You like?

420
00:22:12,817 --> 00:22:15,036
Put penis away, kemosabe.

421
00:22:15,320 --> 00:22:16,661
(ALL CHEERING)

422
00:22:48,520 --> 00:22:50,026
Is that labia?

423
00:22:55,777 --> 00:22:56,821
That is a bear!

424
00:22:56,903 --> 00:22:57,947
Wait, wait, wait, wait!

425
00:22:58,029 --> 00:23:00,283
Wait, wait!
No, no, no!

426
00:23:00,365 --> 00:23:02,536
Doug must have come up
right here! Where is he?

427
00:23:02,617 --> 00:23:03,709
Fuck!

428
00:23:38,153 --> 00:23:39,196
Whoa!

429
00:23:43,074 --> 00:23:44,166
Come on, man.

430
00:23:44,325 --> 00:23:45,666
Come back here!

431
00:23:45,952 --> 00:23:47,922
Fuck! And where's Zach?

432
00:23:49,122 --> 00:23:51,341
Well, hey there, boy.

433
00:23:52,208 --> 00:23:53,300
Ow!

434
00:23:54,919 --> 00:23:56,924
Goddamn women!

435
00:23:57,922 --> 00:23:59,346
Don't mind if I do.

436
00:23:59,466 --> 00:24:03,096
Now, now, don't do nothing
foolish there, N-word.

437
00:24:03,178 --> 00:24:05,432
I like the way you die, boy.

438
00:24:05,889 --> 00:24:07,312
(SCREAMING)

439
00:24:10,393 --> 00:24:11,781
<i>Django's free!</i>

440
00:24:13,938 --> 00:24:15,694
Take that, black!
Dude!

441
00:24:15,774 --> 00:24:17,992
You like baseball, Jackie Robinson?

442
00:24:18,359 --> 00:24:19,487
Oh!

443
00:24:20,278 --> 00:24:21,489
TEDDY: Shit!
Oh, that's cruel!

444
00:24:21,863 --> 00:24:23,998
Hey, you thirsty?
Here's some tea!

445
00:24:24,616 --> 00:24:25,957
Teabag!
Oh, that's nasty.

446
00:24:26,076 --> 00:24:27,410
That's real gross.
Bag, bag, bag!

447
00:24:27,452 --> 00:24:28,875
Please stop.
Just please stop.

448
00:24:28,953 --> 00:24:30,923
Wait, you want some fucking lemon?
Yeah, bag it up!

449
00:24:30,997 --> 00:24:33,251
Come on!
Jesus!

450
00:24:33,458 --> 00:24:35,545
I know that looked bad,
but, come on,

451
00:24:35,627 --> 00:24:39,095
let's keep in mind that the purpose of
this competition is to kill people, yeah.

452
00:24:39,172 --> 00:24:41,557
So that was technically
not a hate crime.

453
00:24:41,633 --> 00:24:45,595
I'm not a racist. I got like eight black
guys on my fantasy football team.

454
00:24:45,678 --> 00:24:48,651
I mean, not the quarterback obviously,
that's a thinking man's position.

455
00:24:48,723 --> 00:24:50,016
Seriously?

456
00:24:50,141 --> 00:24:51,233
(SHUDDERS)

457
00:24:52,811 --> 00:24:53,938
Oh, no, not this!

458
00:24:54,062 --> 00:24:55,154
Fuck this! Go!

459
00:24:55,438 --> 00:24:56,482
Whatever.

460
00:24:59,025 --> 00:25:00,448
(ALL GROAN)

461
00:25:02,195 --> 00:25:04,282
Fuck, fuck, fuck!

462
00:25:04,614 --> 00:25:07,462
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
Fuck, fuck, fuck!

463
00:25:07,534 --> 00:25:09,005
Fuck, fuck, fuck!

464
00:25:10,161 --> 00:25:12,712
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
Fuck, fuck, fuck!

465
00:25:13,498 --> 00:25:16,511
I just watched Django get
kerb-stomped by a teddy bear,

466
00:25:16,668 --> 00:25:19,302
two of our friends are MIA,
and, oh, did I mention,

467
00:25:19,379 --> 00:25:21,716
did I mention this, that my
mouth still tastes like shit!

468
00:25:21,881 --> 00:25:23,471
All right, dude, quit being a baby.

469
00:25:23,550 --> 00:25:26,010
My ass still hurts, too. You
don't hear me whining about it.

470
00:25:26,052 --> 00:25:27,855
It just won't go away.

471
00:25:28,346 --> 00:25:29,687
BOTH: Oh!

472
00:25:30,140 --> 00:25:31,812
What's happening, honkies?

473
00:25:31,891 --> 00:25:34,228
What the hell?
That Asian guy! Really?

474
00:25:34,310 --> 00:25:37,858
What? Oriental man cannot
practise acrobatics in the woods?

475
00:25:37,981 --> 00:25:40,484
You racist assholes think
I'm Viet Cong or something?

476
00:25:40,567 --> 00:25:42,370
Wait, why the fuck are you here?

477
00:25:42,527 --> 00:25:45,375
We had a sick night last night.
I still hungover.

478
00:25:45,488 --> 00:25:47,375
Just tell us what
the fuck happened, okay?

479
00:25:47,532 --> 00:25:49,039
You mean you don't remember?

480
00:25:49,200 --> 00:25:50,327
No.

481
00:25:50,869 --> 00:25:53,088
Human Centipede, bitches!

482
00:25:53,371 --> 00:25:55,293
What's a Human Centipede?

483
00:25:55,373 --> 00:25:58,221
Human Centipede only
the greatest idea ever.

484
00:25:58,334 --> 00:26:01,218
You sew a chain of people
from asshole to mouth hole.

485
00:26:01,379 --> 00:26:03,883
You share the same
digestive system.

486
00:26:03,965 --> 00:26:05,223
Check it out.

487
00:26:05,592 --> 00:26:07,597
We shit brothers!
Oh!

488
00:26:08,136 --> 00:26:09,180
I was the middle.

489
00:26:09,345 --> 00:26:10,603
No!

490
00:26:10,722 --> 00:26:11,979
What the fuck? Fuck!

491
00:26:12,056 --> 00:26:14,642
Why would we do that fucking...
That's disgusting!

492
00:26:14,726 --> 00:26:17,027
You have really potty mouth.

493
00:26:17,187 --> 00:26:19,073
You get it?
Potty mouth!

494
00:26:19,314 --> 00:26:20,986
Because your mouth was potty.

495
00:26:21,357 --> 00:26:22,650
(GAGGING)

496
00:26:26,029 --> 00:26:27,582
Just let it out, man.
(LAUGHING)

497
00:26:27,906 --> 00:26:31,583
Wait, hold on. I was in the
front, so I didn't eat any shit?

498
00:26:31,785 --> 00:26:34,418
Nope. You were total party pooper.

499
00:26:34,913 --> 00:26:35,956
Literally.

500
00:26:36,581 --> 00:26:38,752
(CHUCKLING)
Well, that's a relief, huh?

501
00:26:38,917 --> 00:26:40,554
ED: That's disgusting.

502
00:26:40,627 --> 00:26:43,095
(YAWNING)
It's getting really late.

503
00:26:43,379 --> 00:26:44,720
You know what they say,

504
00:26:44,798 --> 00:26:47,266
early to bed, early
to Human Centipede.

505
00:26:47,383 --> 00:26:49,436
I gotta go Human Centipede
with the Olsen twins.

506
00:26:49,511 --> 00:26:51,148
They've done it before.

507
00:26:51,221 --> 00:26:52,609
See you gay boys later.

508
00:26:57,602 --> 00:27:00,366
Let's find a place to sleep, buddy.
It's been a long day.

509
00:27:00,438 --> 00:27:01,945
Oh, Jesus!

510
00:27:02,107 --> 00:27:03,317
I didn't eat corn.

511
00:27:03,441 --> 00:27:04,699
Yeah, I did.

512
00:27:08,279 --> 00:27:09,703
(GROANING)

513
00:27:11,950 --> 00:27:15,378
Shit, human shit inside me.

514
00:27:15,453 --> 00:27:17,873
Hey, man, we've all been there.

515
00:27:18,957 --> 00:27:20,131
Really?

516
00:27:20,333 --> 00:27:22,338
Fuck, no, I've never been there.

517
00:27:22,419 --> 00:27:24,340
It's the most disgusting
thing I've ever heard.

518
00:27:24,421 --> 00:27:25,548
(CRYING) It is real gross.

519
00:27:25,797 --> 00:27:27,932
Hey, shit-for-breath,
be quiet for a second.

520
00:27:28,007 --> 00:27:30,688
Look over there.
Someone's got a fire going.

521
00:27:30,802 --> 00:27:31,894
That's dumb.

522
00:27:31,970 --> 00:27:33,013
Yup.

523
00:27:34,681 --> 00:27:37,480
MAN: I appreciate the spirited
conversation, gentlemen,

524
00:27:37,559 --> 00:27:39,362
but we all know there's no debate.

525
00:27:39,436 --> 00:27:42,021
I am the weirdest of all the Depps.

526
00:27:42,105 --> 00:27:44,490
I mean, for fuck's
sake, I'm a pirate

527
00:27:44,649 --> 00:27:46,986
who sashays round
like a bloody poof.

528
00:27:48,611 --> 00:27:51,032
And what of you there, top hat?

529
00:27:51,281 --> 00:27:54,045
Well, I do have my fair share
of psychological issues.

530
00:27:54,200 --> 00:27:56,965
My speech patterns mirror
those of sexual molesters.

531
00:27:57,036 --> 00:27:59,717
I keep a bunch of
dwarves as my slaves.

532
00:28:01,708 --> 00:28:03,760
And I masturbate in the chocolate.

533
00:28:03,835 --> 00:28:04,927
(GIGGLES)

534
00:28:05,003 --> 00:28:07,222
Every single batch.

535
00:28:07,464 --> 00:28:09,266
I think I might puke.

536
00:28:11,050 --> 00:28:12,438
(WHISTLES)

537
00:28:21,227 --> 00:28:22,948
Nice work, Tonto.

538
00:28:23,104 --> 00:28:24,990
Say good night, weirdos.

539
00:28:25,064 --> 00:28:26,951
A bloody smoke signal!

540
00:28:27,025 --> 00:28:29,326
You fucked us, you bloody Native!

541
00:28:29,486 --> 00:28:31,158
Tonto sick of white man.

542
00:28:31,237 --> 00:28:32,958
Yes, but we're all Depps, mate!

543
00:28:33,490 --> 00:28:36,254
Tonto especially sick of Depps.

544
00:28:36,576 --> 00:28:38,332
Are you gonna
rape and murder us?

545
00:28:38,703 --> 00:28:41,254
TEDDY: Keep it in your pants,
Scissorhands.

546
00:28:47,629 --> 00:28:49,385
Me next!
Me next!

547
00:28:51,382 --> 00:28:54,894
If you don't mind, I prefer
it in a chocolate factory.

548
00:29:00,517 --> 00:29:01,727
That's brutal.

549
00:29:02,727 --> 00:29:04,779
Now that's what I
call a deep throat.

550
00:29:05,271 --> 00:29:08,700
That means a dozen gone in the
first eight hours, Stephen A.,

551
00:29:08,775 --> 00:29:12,038
and I think I smell
an alliance forming.

552
00:29:12,278 --> 00:29:15,078
What the fuck do you mean,
an alliance?

553
00:29:15,198 --> 00:29:16,788
If it's supposed to be
every man for themself,

554
00:29:16,908 --> 00:29:18,701
they ain't gonna create
no fucking alliance.

555
00:29:18,743 --> 00:29:20,464
They're gonna be out there
killing each other.

556
00:29:20,537 --> 00:29:22,791
That don't make
no goddamn sense!

557
00:29:22,956 --> 00:29:25,755
I know. I can barely keep myself
from killing you, Stephen A.

558
00:29:25,917 --> 00:29:27,507
Can't fault you there.

559
00:29:30,755 --> 00:29:32,511
THOR:
That creepy, pale guy was bananas!

560
00:29:32,590 --> 00:29:34,227
B-A-N-A-N-A-S!

561
00:29:34,300 --> 00:29:36,103
TEDDY: Hey, Thor, we get it.
You like cock.

562
00:29:37,137 --> 00:29:38,608
Fuck, dude.

563
00:29:38,763 --> 00:29:40,186
Don't stay here, don't stay
here, don't stay here.

564
00:29:40,265 --> 00:29:43,029
Anyway, guys, I'm pooped. What say
we just stay here for the night?

565
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:46,146
ZACH: Do you guys think there's
a Chili's out here?

566
00:29:47,147 --> 00:29:50,195
I'll settle for an Applebee's,
but it would be grudgingly.

567
00:29:51,651 --> 00:29:53,324
What the fuck is
he doing with them?

568
00:29:53,403 --> 00:29:56,701
I think he's looking for a reasonably
priced casual dining restaurant.

569
00:29:56,781 --> 00:29:57,873
Thor?

570
00:29:57,991 --> 00:29:59,581
Awesome Blossom?

571
00:30:00,326 --> 00:30:02,581
Tonto?
Jalapeno poppers?

572
00:30:03,246 --> 00:30:05,002
Something for you, Bloody?

573
00:30:05,081 --> 00:30:07,501
If you talk to me again, I
will murder your whole family

574
00:30:07,584 --> 00:30:11,096
and terrorise whatever little Podunk
town you come from, you hear me?

575
00:30:11,171 --> 00:30:14,848
Okay, more fully loaded
potato skins for me then.

576
00:30:15,133 --> 00:30:16,521
How about a bear claw?

577
00:30:16,593 --> 00:30:18,514
Maybe a bun for the wiener?

578
00:30:19,137 --> 00:30:22,649
All right, table for six, seven.
Ladies?

579
00:30:23,516 --> 00:30:25,394
You know, I don't think
we fit the dress code.

580
00:30:25,435 --> 00:30:28,283
Oh, it's a Chili's.
You guys will be fine.

581
00:30:31,858 --> 00:30:33,578
I kill him now, yes?

582
00:30:33,651 --> 00:30:34,779
No.

583
00:30:34,861 --> 00:30:36,415
Let's lock him in
a burning gymnasium

584
00:30:36,488 --> 00:30:39,584
and wait till his guttural
screams slowly fade away.

585
00:30:40,033 --> 00:30:41,670
TEDDY: Easy, Scary.

586
00:30:41,868 --> 00:30:44,668
We need to keep that fat sack
of Asperger's alive for now.

587
00:30:45,205 --> 00:30:48,301
He's our best shot at finding
those two other fuck nuggets.

588
00:30:48,374 --> 00:30:51,673
Would you guys shush already?
I need to get my beauty sleep.

589
00:30:52,462 --> 00:30:53,719
(GROANS)

590
00:30:54,297 --> 00:30:56,267
I'm never gonna be
able to sleep now.

591
00:30:57,008 --> 00:30:59,476
I'm gonna have insomnia for sure.

592
00:31:00,637 --> 00:31:02,025
(SIGHS)

593
00:31:02,180 --> 00:31:04,351
This was the worst day ever.

594
00:31:17,362 --> 00:31:18,703
(SNORING)

595
00:31:32,210 --> 00:31:33,421
What the...

596
00:31:33,878 --> 00:31:35,089
Shit!

597
00:31:35,255 --> 00:31:37,723
Jesus! Shut up, Ed.

598
00:31:37,924 --> 00:31:39,846
Got hit with a fucking boulder.

599
00:31:40,593 --> 00:31:41,685
Hey!

600
00:31:45,223 --> 00:31:46,860
She seems friendly.

601
00:31:51,729 --> 00:31:53,201
What are you nodding at?

602
00:31:53,273 --> 00:31:54,566
I don't...

603
00:31:57,068 --> 00:31:58,741
Use your fucking words!

604
00:32:09,414 --> 00:32:11,300
She wants us to saw the hive off

605
00:32:11,416 --> 00:32:13,338
so that it falls onto them below.

606
00:32:13,418 --> 00:32:14,925
GIRL: No fuckin' shit.

607
00:32:16,755 --> 00:32:18,594
Vulgar little child.

608
00:32:18,923 --> 00:32:21,260
Oh, I have a Swiss Army knife.

609
00:32:21,926 --> 00:32:23,100
Okay.

610
00:32:24,888 --> 00:32:27,224
Uh, hey, you know,
I'm not really athletic.

611
00:32:27,307 --> 00:32:28,897
Do you mind just climbing up there?

612
00:32:28,975 --> 00:32:30,731
Take one for the team?
Come on.

613
00:32:31,978 --> 00:32:33,105
Nice.

614
00:32:38,276 --> 00:32:40,780
Oh, snap! Now looky here.

615
00:32:40,987 --> 00:32:44,119
Them motherfucking hungover honkies
got a trick up their sleeve.

616
00:32:44,282 --> 00:32:46,418
Is that a Swagger
Jacker nest, Skip?

617
00:32:46,493 --> 00:32:49,043
Correct, you are. Now these guys
are gonna have to be careful.

618
00:32:49,120 --> 00:32:52,050
Swagger Jackers
are no ordinary bees.

619
00:32:52,123 --> 00:32:54,045
They are
genetically engineered wasps

620
00:32:54,125 --> 00:32:55,383
that when they sting you,

621
00:32:55,460 --> 00:32:58,141
they drain your body's
natural swagger supply.

622
00:32:58,296 --> 00:33:01,345
In other words, they make
you a straight bitch.

623
00:33:01,424 --> 00:33:04,521
Precisely. And just a few
stings can prove lethal.

624
00:33:05,303 --> 00:33:07,439
I'm crossing my fingers, Skip.

625
00:33:07,597 --> 00:33:08,724
Me, too.

626
00:33:16,147 --> 00:33:18,651
I know you aren't trying
to cut down our nest!

627
00:33:20,902 --> 00:33:21,994
Does that hurt?

628
00:33:22,070 --> 00:33:23,114
Yes, it hurt!

629
00:33:23,238 --> 00:33:25,325
Dude, don't be a pussy.
Saw!

630
00:33:25,824 --> 00:33:27,117
(SNORING)

631
00:33:28,159 --> 00:33:29,370
Oh, God.

632
00:33:32,705 --> 00:33:35,007
They're not gonna sleep in
much longer. Hurry up, man!

633
00:33:36,292 --> 00:33:37,965
(SWAGGER JACKERS CHATTERING)

634
00:33:38,420 --> 00:33:39,511
Hurry up!

635
00:33:39,629 --> 00:33:41,183
Get away from the nest, jerk-off!

636
00:33:45,176 --> 00:33:46,813
TEDDY: Flew in my fucking hole!

637
00:33:46,886 --> 00:33:47,930
(SHRIEKING)

638
00:33:49,139 --> 00:33:51,108
TEDDY: Oh, shit!
Got a bee in my cock.

639
00:33:53,309 --> 00:33:54,863
(ALL SCREAMING)

640
00:33:58,481 --> 00:33:59,869
Oh, Jesus.

641
00:34:02,986 --> 00:34:04,327
Hey, you okay?

642
00:34:04,404 --> 00:34:06,824
A couple of Swagger
Jack-offs stung me.

643
00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:09,826
(SLURRING)
But I'm good.

644
00:34:09,993 --> 00:34:11,914
Hey, hey, hey, sure?
You don't look too good.

645
00:34:11,995 --> 00:34:13,501
I don't feel too good.

646
00:34:13,621 --> 00:34:15,045
No, no, no, no!
Bradley!

647
00:34:20,795 --> 00:34:22,219
I'm coming for you!

648
00:34:23,256 --> 00:34:24,549
You guys see that?

649
00:34:24,632 --> 00:34:25,676
(SCREAMING)

650
00:34:25,759 --> 00:34:27,265
Shit! Shit!

651
00:34:27,343 --> 00:34:29,016
This chubba has literally no swag.

652
00:34:30,388 --> 00:34:33,152
Hey! I was looking
all over for you guys!

653
00:34:39,898 --> 00:34:40,989
(ALL GROANING)

654
00:34:41,065 --> 00:34:42,821
BRADLEY: God, my face hurts.

655
00:34:42,901 --> 00:34:45,618
Oh, I can feel my
heartbeat in my ears.

656
00:34:45,695 --> 00:34:47,202
It's throbbing.
It's really loud.

657
00:34:47,280 --> 00:34:50,246
Hey. Does my head look weird?
It's so loud.

658
00:34:50,492 --> 00:34:51,583
No.

659
00:34:51,659 --> 00:34:53,711
But your body is super tiny.

660
00:34:55,872 --> 00:34:57,083
It is?

661
00:34:57,248 --> 00:34:59,253
Your body is super tiny, man.

662
00:34:59,626 --> 00:35:01,263
Do I look okay?

663
00:35:02,796 --> 00:35:03,923
Yeah.

664
00:35:05,673 --> 00:35:06,765
You're cool.

665
00:35:06,841 --> 00:35:08,728
I am cool, thank you.

666
00:35:09,094 --> 00:35:11,478
This is napping cool time for me.

667
00:35:11,679 --> 00:35:12,937
(GROANS)

668
00:35:13,223 --> 00:35:15,643
This is a terrible pillow.

669
00:35:16,810 --> 00:35:18,281
Sleep sounds good.

670
00:35:33,576 --> 00:35:34,668
Hi.

671
00:35:35,120 --> 00:35:36,626
I've missed you.

672
00:35:37,163 --> 00:35:39,334
I've missed you, too, Katnip.

673
00:35:40,166 --> 00:35:41,554
I'm only 17.

674
00:35:41,668 --> 00:35:43,056
What?

675
00:35:43,128 --> 00:35:44,255
Nothing.

676
00:35:44,337 --> 00:35:46,722
I have something to show you.

677
00:35:50,176 --> 00:35:51,268
ED: Yes.

678
00:35:51,594 --> 00:35:52,686
Yes.

679
00:35:54,806 --> 00:35:56,147
No!

680
00:35:57,851 --> 00:35:59,690
Why?

681
00:35:59,853 --> 00:36:03,151
Hey, are you having
a wet hallucination, Ed?

682
00:36:03,314 --> 00:36:05,783
Yeah, you know,
a nocturnal emission?

683
00:36:05,942 --> 00:36:09,406
God, just when I thought
I couldn't hate you any more.

684
00:36:09,571 --> 00:36:13,165
Hey, ease up. We didn't
choose this way of life.

685
00:36:13,241 --> 00:36:15,246
Yeah, it's no picnic.

686
00:36:15,535 --> 00:36:18,299
You know how hard it is
to motorboat yourself?

687
00:36:18,371 --> 00:36:19,664
God, please don't do it.

688
00:36:22,208 --> 00:36:24,011
This is the worst
wet dream of my life.

689
00:36:24,377 --> 00:36:25,421
See?

690
00:36:25,545 --> 00:36:27,597
Zach, how can you even ruin boobs?

691
00:36:27,797 --> 00:36:30,348
Hey, does my mouth
look like a nipple?

692
00:36:33,094 --> 00:36:34,268
Uh...

693
00:36:34,345 --> 00:36:35,852
It kinda does.

694
00:36:37,640 --> 00:36:40,191
Okay, this is getting weird.
Maybe we should wake him up.

695
00:36:40,351 --> 00:36:41,739
Okay, okay, okay.

696
00:36:41,811 --> 00:36:43,104
On my count.

697
00:36:43,354 --> 00:36:46,902
One, two, three!

698
00:36:47,567 --> 00:36:48,659
BOTH: Boom!

699
00:36:48,818 --> 00:36:49,945
Bearded boobies!

700
00:36:50,278 --> 00:36:51,666
(SHOUTING)

701
00:36:56,534 --> 00:36:57,958
How long have we been out, man?

702
00:36:58,203 --> 00:36:59,460
Couple days.

703
00:36:59,537 --> 00:37:01,749
I've been licking your wounds.
What?

704
00:37:01,831 --> 00:37:04,679
I've been watching you guys sleep,
nursing you back to health.

705
00:37:04,834 --> 00:37:08,013
Scrotal touching was just
for medicinal purposes.

706
00:37:09,214 --> 00:37:12,595
We saw those Swagger
Jackers sting you, man. A lot.

707
00:37:12,675 --> 00:37:14,515
Yeah, but their venom has no effect

708
00:37:14,636 --> 00:37:16,475
if you have no swagger to jack.

709
00:37:16,554 --> 00:37:18,394
Hold on a second.

710
00:37:19,057 --> 00:37:21,059
What the hell were you
doing with that gang, man?

711
00:37:24,562 --> 00:37:26,235
You were gonna help them kill us?

712
00:37:27,565 --> 00:37:29,902
You guys, I don't do
well with peer pressure.

713
00:37:29,984 --> 00:37:32,321
I didn't really want to murder you.

714
00:37:32,570 --> 00:37:34,825
But you would have?

715
00:37:38,618 --> 00:37:39,876
Oh, come on!

716
00:37:39,953 --> 00:37:41,839
I'm sorry!
I had a moment of weakness!

717
00:37:41,913 --> 00:37:44,713
I nursed you back to health.
Don't you feel swaggy?

718
00:37:45,875 --> 00:37:46,967
Yeah.

719
00:37:47,085 --> 00:37:48,259
Yeah.

720
00:37:48,628 --> 00:37:50,431
I really do, actually.

721
00:37:51,047 --> 00:37:52,388
It's because of this.

722
00:37:52,465 --> 00:37:53,592
Swagger Balm.

723
00:37:56,928 --> 00:37:59,514
"Ingredients, aloe, palm oil,

724
00:37:59,597 --> 00:38:02,101
"and Kanye West extract?"

725
00:38:02,308 --> 00:38:04,693
Tastes just like the real thing.

726
00:38:05,145 --> 00:38:06,236
(GAGGING)

727
00:38:06,312 --> 00:38:07,736
WOMAN: Hey, boys.

728
00:38:07,897 --> 00:38:09,653
We thought we smelt some swagger.

729
00:38:11,609 --> 00:38:12,737
Puts the rocks down, buddy.

730
00:38:12,819 --> 00:38:14,160
(WHOOPING)

731
00:38:14,446 --> 00:38:18,289
I just wanna get
sloppy drunk and slutty!

732
00:38:18,908 --> 00:38:21,127
Way too late for that, sweetheart.

733
00:38:21,911 --> 00:38:23,003
I get the blondes.

734
00:38:23,079 --> 00:38:24,123
Okay.

735
00:38:26,791 --> 00:38:28,298
That's rich!

736
00:38:28,752 --> 00:38:33,343
So then I divorced that asshole
and took half of everything.

737
00:38:33,840 --> 00:38:36,343
That's how I got my lucky charm.

738
00:38:36,843 --> 00:38:39,263
Is it that ring?
It's lovely.

739
00:38:39,345 --> 00:38:41,267
I'm not talking about that.

740
00:38:41,347 --> 00:38:42,735
I'm talking about

741
00:38:42,807 --> 00:38:43,899
this.

742
00:38:44,476 --> 00:38:46,278
(LAUGHING)
Is that a fucking ball?

743
00:38:46,352 --> 00:38:47,563
Neat!

744
00:38:49,647 --> 00:38:53,870
I told you, when I took half of
everything, I meant half of everything.

745
00:38:54,027 --> 00:38:56,708
You girls are such a treat.

746
00:38:56,863 --> 00:38:58,500
Great!
Here's to good friends!

747
00:38:58,656 --> 00:38:59,867
And you two bitches.

748
00:39:01,493 --> 00:39:03,414
Well, well, well,

749
00:39:03,536 --> 00:39:05,873
if it isn't the popular girls.

750
00:39:06,039 --> 00:39:08,376
Nice blood outfit, honey, but
that's worse than pleather.

751
00:39:08,792 --> 00:39:11,260
What is that, O positive?

752
00:39:11,461 --> 00:39:12,968
Awful.
So last season.

753
00:39:13,046 --> 00:39:14,090
What is that, gas?

754
00:39:14,172 --> 00:39:16,550
You got that on my Gucci dress!
Bitch!

755
00:39:17,133 --> 00:39:18,426
What are you doing?

756
00:39:18,551 --> 00:39:19,844
Do you know how much this cost?

757
00:39:21,805 --> 00:39:23,726
Wait, I just wanna
see where this is going!

758
00:39:23,807 --> 00:39:25,194
Zach, let's go!

759
00:39:25,892 --> 00:39:27,019
Game, set...

760
00:39:27,185 --> 00:39:28,359
No! No!

761
00:39:29,354 --> 00:39:30,695
...match!

762
00:39:31,272 --> 00:39:32,863
(ALL SCREAMING)

763
00:39:33,817 --> 00:39:36,830
WOMAN: My tits are gonna melt!

764
00:39:45,161 --> 00:39:48,009
You wanted to see me,
President Snowbama?

765
00:39:48,540 --> 00:39:51,921
Tell me, have you
ever been hungover?

766
00:39:52,544 --> 00:39:54,050
Why, yes.

767
00:39:54,421 --> 00:39:56,722
I'm actually hungover right now.

768
00:39:57,257 --> 00:39:59,641
Never pass out in a crowded bar.

769
00:40:00,593 --> 00:40:03,441
Yes, they shaved
a dick on my face, sir.

770
00:40:04,431 --> 00:40:08,108
These hungover contestants,
people seem to care about them.

771
00:40:08,852 --> 00:40:11,355
Yes?
Is that a bad thing, sir?

772
00:40:11,438 --> 00:40:13,490
The Games are a distraction

773
00:40:13,565 --> 00:40:16,033
so people won't notice
the crap we peddle out.

774
00:40:16,109 --> 00:40:19,206
Sequels, remakes, spoofs.

775
00:40:21,239 --> 00:40:23,624
When people start to care,
bad things happen.

776
00:40:23,742 --> 00:40:24,999
Ratings go down,

777
00:40:25,160 --> 00:40:27,247
beards get shaved.

778
00:40:27,620 --> 00:40:29,460
I've got it under control, sir.

779
00:40:40,633 --> 00:40:42,270
It's a kitty cat.

780
00:40:42,635 --> 00:40:44,605
'Cause you're a little pussy.

781
00:40:48,808 --> 00:40:50,813
Thank you, Mr President.

782
00:40:53,396 --> 00:40:54,950
(CANNON BLAST)

783
00:40:55,231 --> 00:40:58,695
Shit! Any one of these
cannon blasts could be Doug.

784
00:40:58,777 --> 00:41:00,532
We don't even know
if he's still alive.

785
00:41:00,612 --> 00:41:03,198
Hey, I'm scared, too, but the one
thing that's not gonna get us

786
00:41:03,239 --> 00:41:05,576
back to that gay wedding is
sitting here crying about it.

787
00:41:05,825 --> 00:41:08,127
There should only be
a handful of contestants left.

788
00:41:08,995 --> 00:41:10,122
We can do this, man.

789
00:41:10,246 --> 00:41:11,338
You guys.

790
00:41:11,998 --> 00:41:15,174
Hey, since we're standing around
sharing things, I've got a doozy.

791
00:41:15,251 --> 00:41:17,054
What the hell did you do, Zach?

792
00:41:17,253 --> 00:41:19,424
You know the air fresheners
that I plugged in?

793
00:41:19,506 --> 00:41:21,012
Best thing you ever did.
They were delightful.

794
00:41:21,091 --> 00:41:26,014
Well, it wasn't Lilac or Morning
Mist or Brazilian Breeze.

795
00:41:26,096 --> 00:41:27,768
It was Midnight Berry.

796
00:41:27,847 --> 00:41:29,603
What the shit is Midnight Berry?

797
00:41:29,849 --> 00:41:32,732
From the novels.
It's aromatic.

798
00:41:33,186 --> 00:41:35,487
What's so bad about that?

799
00:41:36,106 --> 00:41:37,992
Well, I didn't finish my thought.

800
00:41:38,983 --> 00:41:42,246
It's aromatic,
poisonous and lethal.

801
00:41:42,320 --> 00:41:44,123
What the fuck is wrong with you?

802
00:41:44,197 --> 00:41:45,917
Are you kidding me?

803
00:41:45,990 --> 00:41:49,872
I think you guys are getting hung up on
the fact that it's poisonous and lethal.

804
00:41:49,953 --> 00:41:51,709
They smell fresh.

805
00:41:52,080 --> 00:41:53,172
Smell.

806
00:41:54,207 --> 00:41:55,500
Jesus!
Fuck, man!

807
00:41:55,875 --> 00:41:57,002
God!

808
00:41:57,168 --> 00:41:58,426
(GROANS)

809
00:41:59,087 --> 00:42:01,092
Yeah, it says right
here on the label,

810
00:42:01,172 --> 00:42:05,598
"May cause transportation
to futuristic dystopia."

811
00:42:05,677 --> 00:42:06,768
"Maw.

812
00:42:06,845 --> 00:42:08,980
You're the reason we're here,
you sausage-fingered fuck!

813
00:42:09,055 --> 00:42:10,229
This is all your fault!

814
00:42:10,348 --> 00:42:13,527
Hey, you said you liked the scent!
Because I like floral scents!

815
00:42:13,601 --> 00:42:14,645
Well, there, he said it!

816
00:42:14,727 --> 00:42:17,445
So now I forgive you guys
and we can move forward!

817
00:42:17,647 --> 00:42:18,821
I... Ooh!

818
00:42:18,898 --> 00:42:21,698
I hope you die out here.

819
00:42:23,445 --> 00:42:24,488
No.

820
00:42:24,612 --> 00:42:26,203
You fucked up.

821
00:42:29,242 --> 00:42:30,998
That was harsh.

822
00:42:41,588 --> 00:42:44,305
The sloth is heading towards
the soup pot. Over.

823
00:42:44,382 --> 00:42:46,387
<i>MAN: 10-4, squaw without bra.</i>

824
00:42:47,177 --> 00:42:48,268
Nice.

825
00:42:48,762 --> 00:42:50,814
(CHUCKLES)
Yeah. Real nice.

826
00:42:53,600 --> 00:42:55,569
Stupid Midnight Berry!

827
00:42:55,727 --> 00:42:58,906
Why does something so fragrant
have to be so bad?

828
00:42:59,230 --> 00:43:00,274
(SIGHS)

829
00:43:00,356 --> 00:43:02,990
Thank God, thank God.
Thank God.

830
00:43:03,068 --> 00:43:04,111
(WOMEN GIGGLING)

831
00:43:17,624 --> 00:43:20,721
Get outta the way.
Get outta the way.

832
00:43:25,423 --> 00:43:27,760
Yeah, that's more like it.

833
00:43:27,842 --> 00:43:28,934
There.

834
00:43:33,181 --> 00:43:36,775
I thought I'd never say this,
but Daddy wants blue balls.

835
00:43:55,453 --> 00:43:57,505
<i>MAN OVER PA:
Attention, everyone. Attention.</i>

836
00:43:57,872 --> 00:44:00,590
We have some new
rules for you kids.

837
00:44:00,667 --> 00:44:02,055
<i>From this point forward</i>

838
00:44:02,210 --> 00:44:07,347
contestants of colour will be
granted special consideration.

839
00:44:07,424 --> 00:44:09,974
Yes, I'm talking about
affirmative action, people.

840
00:44:10,260 --> 00:44:11,351
Zach!
<i>It's the 21st century...</i>

841
00:44:11,469 --> 00:44:13,474
(SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGE)

842
00:44:16,433 --> 00:44:17,690
Whatever you say.

843
00:44:18,351 --> 00:44:22,408
I think I speak for all of us when
I ask you to give us some privacy.

844
00:44:22,480 --> 00:44:24,034
With pleasure.

845
00:44:27,026 --> 00:44:28,829
WOMAN: Boys, have at him.

846
00:44:31,865 --> 00:44:33,206
Nice weave, bitch.

847
00:44:33,366 --> 00:44:36,130
Her hair is all natural.
Take that back!

848
00:44:36,661 --> 00:44:39,295
You wanna kill her,
you gotta kill me first.

849
00:44:39,372 --> 00:44:40,665
(SCREAMS)

850
00:44:46,504 --> 00:44:48,841
Blue scalp.
Rarest of scalps.

851
00:44:50,216 --> 00:44:51,604
Your turn, dumpy.

852
00:44:56,848 --> 00:44:57,975
Yeah!

853
00:45:02,020 --> 00:45:05,234
Gratuitous nudity no match
for gratuitous violence.

854
00:45:35,845 --> 00:45:37,815
Farewell, my princess.

855
00:45:40,475 --> 00:45:41,732
(CRYING)

856
00:45:42,393 --> 00:45:44,529
Maybe just one more squeeze.

857
00:45:48,775 --> 00:45:50,984
Go in a bit tighter.

858
00:45:51,736 --> 00:45:54,121
What the hell is he doing?

859
00:45:58,451 --> 00:45:59,702
Nothing on three.
I don't know.

860
00:45:59,744 --> 00:46:00,955
Oh, no.

861
00:46:02,747 --> 00:46:03,958
Oh, no.

862
00:46:06,292 --> 00:46:09,010
Vivian, would you
please get IT in here?

863
00:46:09,629 --> 00:46:10,887
Oy vey.

864
00:46:11,381 --> 00:46:12,804
What up, bitches?

865
00:46:12,966 --> 00:46:14,009
You fix computers?

866
00:46:14,134 --> 00:46:15,177
Hell yeah!

867
00:46:15,260 --> 00:46:19,222
I may be sociopathic gangster, but
I'm still Asian, motherfuckers!

868
00:46:19,931 --> 00:46:21,023
What?

869
00:46:21,099 --> 00:46:23,733
No, no, no, I really don't think you
should be messing around with...

870
00:46:23,810 --> 00:46:24,984
Finished!

871
00:46:26,146 --> 00:46:27,569
Excellent.

872
00:46:28,606 --> 00:46:29,864
Thank you.

873
00:46:32,485 --> 00:46:34,455
We're back up, people.

874
00:46:35,822 --> 00:46:38,752
Oh, come on, Zach!
That not cool.

875
00:46:38,825 --> 00:46:39,869
(LAUGHING)

876
00:46:39,951 --> 00:46:41,790
Excuse me.
You may leave now.

877
00:46:41,953 --> 00:46:43,875
What, I get no tip?
No.

878
00:46:43,955 --> 00:46:46,174
I take cash, credit, no cheque.

879
00:46:46,249 --> 00:46:47,459
But I'll take a bump of coke.

880
00:46:47,542 --> 00:46:50,181
All right, get the hell out of here.
Chop-chop!

881
00:46:50,462 --> 00:46:51,672
(SIGHS)

882
00:46:52,505 --> 00:46:54,807
What to do, what to do?

883
00:46:56,009 --> 00:46:58,345
You wanna get the ratings up?

884
00:46:58,970 --> 00:47:01,604
I got one word for you,

885
00:47:04,142 --> 00:47:05,862
bromance.

886
00:47:06,436 --> 00:47:09,236
That's not a real word.

887
00:47:09,397 --> 00:47:12,280
You wanna give
these districts a story?

888
00:47:14,027 --> 00:47:18,618
Well, you need to
keep these guys together.

889
00:47:19,157 --> 00:47:20,284
Not separate.

890
00:47:21,493 --> 00:47:22,667
Hmm.

891
00:47:24,788 --> 00:47:27,006
I got one word for you,

892
00:47:28,833 --> 00:47:30,044
heroin.

893
00:47:31,878 --> 00:47:34,512
"Heroin" is the one word?

894
00:47:34,589 --> 00:47:35,681
No.

895
00:47:35,840 --> 00:47:38,225
I'm just really looking for some.
You holding?

896
00:47:38,301 --> 00:47:39,559
I'm sorry.

897
00:47:39,677 --> 00:47:41,683
I got one word for you,

898
00:47:44,057 --> 00:47:45,398
dicksauce.

899
00:47:45,558 --> 00:47:47,777
"Dicksauce"? "Dicksauce"
is the one word?

900
00:47:47,852 --> 00:47:49,193
You can't buy that shit.

901
00:47:49,354 --> 00:47:52,568
Well, thank you. Your time
here has been so valuable.

902
00:47:52,649 --> 00:47:53,906
(SHOUTS)

903
00:47:59,781 --> 00:48:01,703
Bromance. Hmm.

904
00:48:06,579 --> 00:48:07,671
(PANTING)

905
00:48:07,747 --> 00:48:09,337
Hey, hey, hey.

906
00:48:09,707 --> 00:48:11,261
Is that water?

907
00:48:11,709 --> 00:48:13,928
Fuck it, I'm thirsty as hell!

908
00:48:16,423 --> 00:48:18,593
Don't put your mouth on that.
It's gross.

909
00:48:18,675 --> 00:48:20,228
Do you think it's filtered?

910
00:48:20,885 --> 00:48:22,059
Really?

911
00:48:22,220 --> 00:48:23,431
I only drink bottled water.

912
00:48:24,097 --> 00:48:26,440
Didn't you just have shit in your mouth?
All right! Fine!

913
00:48:26,516 --> 00:48:28,817
I didn't intentionally
have shit in my mouth.

914
00:48:28,893 --> 00:48:31,320
It tastes a lot like blood, though.
(SPITTING)

915
00:48:31,396 --> 00:48:32,488
What?

916
00:48:32,564 --> 00:48:35,198
<i>MAN OVER PA: Check, check.
Hot mic. Hot mic.</i>

917
00:48:35,275 --> 00:48:37,743
<i>Attention, everyone.
Attention.</i>

918
00:48:38,069 --> 00:48:40,454
There has been
a change in the rules.

919
00:48:40,613 --> 00:48:45,039
Yes, from now on, multiple
victors may be crowned

920
00:48:45,118 --> 00:48:49,709
<i>if they survive the Games
and share a long-standing bond</i>

921
00:48:50,039 --> 00:48:52,590
of exceptional male bromance.

922
00:48:52,751 --> 00:48:54,091
They can do that?

923
00:48:54,252 --> 00:48:56,933
Yes, I am allowed to do this.

924
00:48:57,088 --> 00:48:59,592
I can do whatever the fuck I want,
I'm a motherfucking Gamesman!

925
00:48:59,674 --> 00:49:00,718
Noted.

926
00:49:00,800 --> 00:49:03,055
So good luck to you all

927
00:49:03,136 --> 00:49:06,564
and may the probabilities
be ever to your liking.

928
00:49:08,475 --> 00:49:10,811
So that means we can
all get out of this alive.

929
00:49:10,977 --> 00:49:13,196
All we have to do is find Doug and

930
00:49:13,438 --> 00:49:16,692
Zach! Zach! Zach! Zach!
BRADLEY: We're sorry, buddy!

931
00:49:18,109 --> 00:49:19,402
Zach!

932
00:49:21,321 --> 00:49:22,958
Where are you, man?

933
00:49:24,699 --> 00:49:26,455
You dropped your glasses.

934
00:49:27,410 --> 00:49:29,830
Hey, quick question.

935
00:49:30,413 --> 00:49:33,261
If they can just change
the rules at anytime,

936
00:49:33,333 --> 00:49:36,050
why don't they just pick who they
want to win and make it happen?

937
00:49:37,128 --> 00:49:38,884
This is confusing to me.

938
00:49:38,963 --> 00:49:41,300
Don't worry about it, man.
It's just a plot hole.

939
00:49:43,009 --> 00:49:44,979
Hold on a sec.
What?

940
00:49:45,178 --> 00:49:46,566
Zach said they used these birds

941
00:49:46,679 --> 00:49:48,067
to find each other in the book.

942
00:49:48,139 --> 00:49:50,310
Like by whistling to them.
Hmm.

943
00:49:50,767 --> 00:49:52,274
Worth a shot.

944
00:49:54,270 --> 00:49:55,694
(WHISTLING)

945
00:49:59,317 --> 00:50:00,409
Yeah, that worked.

946
00:50:00,485 --> 00:50:01,577
Shut up.

947
00:50:01,820 --> 00:50:03,197
All right, one more time.
Damn it.

948
00:50:03,238 --> 00:50:04,495
Sure, I'll help.

949
00:50:05,115 --> 00:50:06,752
(BOTH WHISTLING)

950
00:50:07,617 --> 00:50:09,622
TALKING JAY: Suck my bird cock!

951
00:50:09,702 --> 00:50:10,995
Come on!
Really?

952
00:50:11,162 --> 00:50:13,167
Marco! Marco!

953
00:50:13,331 --> 00:50:14,672
We don't have time for this!

954
00:50:14,791 --> 00:50:16,084
Marco!

955
00:50:17,502 --> 00:50:19,721
Why couldn't you just say, "Polo"?

956
00:50:19,838 --> 00:50:21,309
There you are.

957
00:50:21,381 --> 00:50:22,934
Listen, not that I give a hoot,

958
00:50:23,007 --> 00:50:27,018
but your fat friend Zach's about a
half mile away from here with Katnip.

959
00:50:27,095 --> 00:50:28,269
How do you know?

960
00:50:28,346 --> 00:50:29,853
A little birdie told me.

961
00:50:30,014 --> 00:50:34,570
And by a little birdie, I mean a
chickadee who gave me a beakjob.

962
00:50:34,727 --> 00:50:37,408
You want to find
this overgrown garden gnome?

963
00:50:37,480 --> 00:50:40,659
Yeah. And Katnip.
And stop fucking yelling, man.

964
00:50:48,283 --> 00:50:52,542
TALKING JAY: Anyway, that's why I'm not
allowed to go near schools any more.

965
00:50:53,747 --> 00:50:55,134
Good to know.

966
00:50:55,206 --> 00:50:56,417
Yeah!

967
00:50:57,083 --> 00:50:59,302
You guys!
Oh. my God!

968
00:50:59,377 --> 00:51:00,967
I missed you guys so much!

969
00:51:04,632 --> 00:51:06,186
Yeah. Okay.

970
00:51:06,259 --> 00:51:07,433
Where's Katnip?

971
00:51:07,844 --> 00:51:09,398
She's over there.

972
00:51:11,848 --> 00:51:13,818
You've got the talking jay!

973
00:51:13,892 --> 00:51:17,356
Sorry, Bradley, but this guy just
made me crap down your shirt.

974
00:51:17,437 --> 00:51:20,322
Everything he says is so foul!
Yeah, he says disgusting stuff.

975
00:51:20,398 --> 00:51:21,442
Come on!

976
00:51:21,524 --> 00:51:24,110
Where are we going?
Fuck.

977
00:51:28,948 --> 00:51:30,076
Ooh.

978
00:51:36,790 --> 00:51:39,091
Maybe I should tell her I'm...

979
00:51:39,626 --> 00:51:41,465
No, no, I should not.

980
00:51:41,878 --> 00:51:43,089
(SIGHS)

981
00:51:43,797 --> 00:51:45,434
Wow, yeah, this is not...

982
00:51:46,132 --> 00:51:48,517
This isn't pervy at all.
Yes, it is.

983
00:51:51,304 --> 00:51:53,523
Hey! Perverted ass cracker!

984
00:51:53,890 --> 00:51:55,017
Hey!

985
00:51:55,809 --> 00:51:57,814
Trees are nice here.

986
00:51:57,894 --> 00:51:58,986
Ed!

987
00:52:00,396 --> 00:52:02,283
Oh, my God, you're okay!

988
00:52:02,357 --> 00:52:03,484
Hey!

989
00:52:06,152 --> 00:52:07,279
Oh...

990
00:52:08,279 --> 00:52:13,120
Um, that is a respect boner. A
boner achieved out of respect.

991
00:52:13,201 --> 00:52:14,293
Um...

992
00:52:14,619 --> 00:52:17,039
You know I'm 17, right?
La, la, la!

993
00:52:17,122 --> 00:52:19,209
What? I can't hear you!
It just got real loud in here!

994
00:52:19,290 --> 00:52:20,382
Hey, guys. hell.

995
00:52:20,500 --> 00:52:21,592
Hi.

996
00:52:21,751 --> 00:52:23,044
No sign of Doug?

997
00:52:23,169 --> 00:52:24,462
Nope. Nothing.

998
00:52:26,506 --> 00:52:28,060
Wait a minute.

999
00:52:28,133 --> 00:52:31,177
He came with your district. You were
the last one to see him at the arena.

1000
00:52:31,261 --> 00:52:33,811
Do you have any idea where he went?

1001
00:52:35,598 --> 00:52:39,442
Well, do you feel like telling us?

1002
00:52:41,312 --> 00:52:44,327
Okay, I've had about enough of this.
Hey, hey, hey, come on!

1003
00:52:44,482 --> 00:52:46,867
That's like a triple hate crime.

1004
00:52:47,152 --> 00:52:48,243
Hey.

1005
00:52:49,154 --> 00:52:51,123
They're just looking
for their friend.

1006
00:52:51,197 --> 00:52:53,617
Do you want to tell them?
For me?

1007
00:52:55,326 --> 00:52:56,999
(ALL EXCLAIMING)

1008
00:53:06,171 --> 00:53:07,512
You got Norsed!

1009
00:53:08,173 --> 00:53:09,264
Shit!

1010
00:53:09,340 --> 00:53:10,728
What the hell is wrong with you?

1011
00:53:14,095 --> 00:53:15,187
Oh, shit!

1012
00:53:15,388 --> 00:53:17,025
(ALL EXCLAIMING)

1013
00:53:22,020 --> 00:53:24,356
That took awhile. Who wants
to go get margaritas?

1014
00:53:24,564 --> 00:53:26,735
What the frick do we do now?

1015
00:53:26,816 --> 00:53:28,370
I don't know, Zach,
it's been a while since

1016
00:53:28,526 --> 00:53:30,080
I've had to battle
the God of Thunder!

1017
00:53:33,782 --> 00:53:35,075
Hey, blondie!

1018
00:53:35,575 --> 00:53:37,378
Pick on someone your own size!

1019
00:53:39,412 --> 00:53:40,705
(CHOKING)

1020
00:53:43,708 --> 00:53:45,713
Yeah! Nice shot, Ed!

1021
00:53:46,127 --> 00:53:49,888
I just killed a god.
Did you guys see...

1022
00:53:49,964 --> 00:53:51,056
Oh, shit.

1023
00:53:54,552 --> 00:53:55,679
Hey.

1024
00:53:56,596 --> 00:53:58,566
You okay? Come on, wake up.

1025
00:53:59,432 --> 00:54:01,687
You're a doctor, right?
You can help her.

1026
00:54:02,393 --> 00:54:04,031
I'm a dentist.

1027
00:54:04,771 --> 00:54:06,159
Check her teeth.

1028
00:54:11,444 --> 00:54:11,693
ZACH: <i>♪ Ave Maria</i>

1029
00:54:11,694 --> 00:54:15,206
ZACH: <i>♪ Ave Maria</i>

1030
00:54:21,746 --> 00:54:25,210
<i>♪ Gratia plena ♪</i>

1031
00:54:30,797 --> 00:54:32,968
You guys wanna hear some Wu-Tang?

1032
00:54:34,801 --> 00:54:36,391
She was so young.

1033
00:54:36,719 --> 00:54:38,107
What a waste.

1034
00:54:39,597 --> 00:54:40,689
There, buddy.

1035
00:54:40,890 --> 00:54:42,978
She had so much ahead for her.

1036
00:54:43,309 --> 00:54:44,602
Her first kiss.

1037
00:54:45,061 --> 00:54:46,651
Her first handjob.

1038
00:54:48,106 --> 00:54:49,945
Her first bukkake.

1039
00:54:50,608 --> 00:54:52,364
Unless you guys wanna
give her a send-off.

1040
00:54:52,444 --> 00:54:54,199
No.
Wow.

1041
00:54:57,282 --> 00:54:58,835
She's at peace.

1042
00:54:59,117 --> 00:55:01,336
Or in some dark, endless abyss.

1043
00:55:08,668 --> 00:55:09,795
Wait.

1044
00:55:10,628 --> 00:55:12,598
We need to pay our respects.

1045
00:55:13,006 --> 00:55:14,394
With a salute.

1046
00:55:23,641 --> 00:55:25,232
Two in the pink.

1047
00:55:26,060 --> 00:55:27,448
One in the stink.

1048
00:55:27,520 --> 00:55:28,813
ALL: Forever.

1049
00:55:48,124 --> 00:55:50,129
Can I ask you a serious question?

1050
00:55:50,335 --> 00:55:51,972
Yeah, anything, man.

1051
00:55:52,128 --> 00:55:55,177
Which one's the pink
and which one's the stink?

1052
00:55:55,548 --> 00:55:57,269
Because they're both pinkish.

1053
00:55:57,342 --> 00:55:59,014
And they both stink.

1054
00:55:59,677 --> 00:56:00,769
Yeah.

1055
00:56:00,970 --> 00:56:03,022
Remember when I told you
to ask me anything?

1056
00:56:03,681 --> 00:56:04,974
Forget I said that.

1057
00:56:05,141 --> 00:56:06,565
You don't know, do you?

1058
00:56:06,768 --> 00:56:10,730
<i>MAN OVER PA: Hello. Attention,
everyone. Attention.</i>

1059
00:56:11,064 --> 00:56:13,235
It is my profound pleasure

1060
00:56:13,399 --> 00:56:15,535
to invite you all to

1061
00:56:15,693 --> 00:56:16,821
a feast!

1062
00:56:16,945 --> 00:56:18,036
Feast?

1063
00:56:18,321 --> 00:56:20,706
And this will be no
ordinary occasion.

1064
00:56:20,907 --> 00:56:23,457
<i>We know that you
all want something</i>

1065
00:56:23,535 --> 00:56:25,421
and you want it bad.

1066
00:56:25,787 --> 00:56:28,884
<i>And we are aiming
to be very generous hosts.</i>

1067
00:56:29,124 --> 00:56:33,003
Now, there will be some
weapons available,

1068
00:56:33,086 --> 00:56:37,558
but I strongly suggest
that you all BYO weapon.

1069
00:56:37,715 --> 00:56:39,222
<i>Because I don't wanna get blamed</i>

1070
00:56:39,384 --> 00:56:40,855
<i>if we run out like the last time.</i>

1071
00:56:40,927 --> 00:56:41,935
<i>That was embarrassing.</i>

1072
00:56:42,011 --> 00:56:43,139
Oh!

1073
00:56:43,221 --> 00:56:47,860
I also really need
someone to bring ice.

1074
00:56:48,017 --> 00:56:50,319
<i>I had a sign-up
sheet at the Reaping.</i>

1075
00:56:50,395 --> 00:56:52,780
Nobody fucking chose ice.
What's the big deal?

1076
00:56:52,856 --> 00:56:56,403
Come on, somebody.
Be a rock star. Own it.

1077
00:56:56,568 --> 00:56:58,454
Ice, out.

1078
00:56:58,987 --> 00:57:01,074
Has anyone seen
a 7-Eleven out here?

1079
00:57:02,282 --> 00:57:05,379
Attention, everyone.
Attention.

1080
00:57:05,452 --> 00:57:10,340
We are looking for a competitor
named Harry Ballsonya.

1081
00:57:10,957 --> 00:57:12,428
Harry Ballsonya?

1082
00:57:12,751 --> 00:57:15,799
<i>Please report to the
control room immediately.</i>

1083
00:57:15,962 --> 00:57:18,596
I repeat, Harry Ballsonya.

1084
00:57:18,757 --> 00:57:20,596
This will be the...
(ALL GIGGLING)

1085
00:57:20,759 --> 00:57:23,309
Oh, damn it!
Who did this?

1086
00:57:23,803 --> 00:57:26,769
Making me look like
a fucking asshole!

1087
00:57:29,184 --> 00:57:30,571
(SHUSHING)

1088
00:57:38,526 --> 00:57:40,697
We really should have brought ice.

1089
00:57:41,237 --> 00:57:42,530
Don't worry about it.

1090
00:57:42,614 --> 00:57:43,705
Hey!

1091
00:57:43,990 --> 00:57:45,627
Is that a cell phone?

1092
00:57:48,453 --> 00:57:51,335
Maybe we can use it to call the wedding.
Stall them or something.

1093
00:57:51,498 --> 00:57:52,921
I'm on it.
Hey!

1094
00:57:53,500 --> 00:57:55,220
I wouldn't do that.

1095
00:57:55,293 --> 00:57:57,429
See those lumps of dirt?

1096
00:57:58,088 --> 00:57:59,475
Dog poops.

1097
00:57:59,631 --> 00:58:01,019
Landmines.

1098
00:58:01,508 --> 00:58:05,351
If you guys are gonna get through
this, you better watch your step.

1099
00:58:05,678 --> 00:58:06,770
Check it out.

1100
00:58:22,028 --> 00:58:25,243
Hey, when you said, "you guys,"

1101
00:58:25,865 --> 00:58:28,001
are you not coming with us?

1102
00:58:28,535 --> 00:58:31,667
I need to go find
Tonto and kill him,

1103
00:58:32,288 --> 00:58:34,009
but this is for you.

1104
00:58:34,582 --> 00:58:35,840
Mm-hmm.

1105
00:58:38,169 --> 00:58:40,009
Yeah, if you...

1106
00:58:40,713 --> 00:58:43,217
If you just wait,
we'll go with you.

1107
00:58:43,299 --> 00:58:45,351
We can protect you.

1108
00:58:45,427 --> 00:58:46,980
(BOTH LAUGHING)

1109
00:58:48,179 --> 00:58:49,271
Awww.

1110
00:58:52,475 --> 00:58:53,602
Oh, you're serious.

1111
00:58:53,852 --> 00:58:54,943
Yeah.

1112
00:58:55,562 --> 00:58:58,659
Look, the only reason I don't
want you guys coming with me

1113
00:58:58,731 --> 00:59:00,950
is because you would
completely fuck it up.

1114
00:59:01,025 --> 00:59:02,912
No of fence.
Oh.

1115
00:59:03,570 --> 00:59:04,661
Okay.

1116
00:59:04,738 --> 00:59:06,908
I really do love you.

1117
00:59:08,908 --> 00:59:10,664
Frankly, I'm surprised
you're still alive.

1118
00:59:10,785 --> 00:59:12,541
Okay, got it.

1119
00:59:13,913 --> 00:59:15,206
Bye, Ed.

1120
00:59:17,709 --> 00:59:19,548
Yup, bye, Katnip.

1121
00:59:20,879 --> 00:59:22,551
Be safe.
Yeah.

1122
00:59:26,009 --> 00:59:27,562
Try not to die.

1123
00:59:34,225 --> 00:59:36,195
Sorry, buddy.
She'll be back.

1124
00:59:37,228 --> 00:59:39,565
Mm-hmm.
Although unless she has a birthday

1125
00:59:39,647 --> 00:59:41,238
in the next couple of hours,
she'll still be 17.

1126
00:59:41,608 --> 00:59:43,447
Yeah, got it.

1127
00:59:43,943 --> 00:59:46,661
I know we're in a futuristic
dystopia and everything,

1128
00:59:46,738 --> 00:59:48,541
but jailbait is jailbait, brother.

1129
00:59:48,615 --> 00:59:51,961
Yeah, what dating site did you
get her from? J-Bait?

1130
00:59:52,368 --> 00:59:53,412
Get it?

1131
00:59:53,620 --> 00:59:55,921
Not now, Zach.
But good one.

1132
00:59:56,915 --> 00:59:58,635
Hey! Hey!

1133
00:59:59,584 --> 01:00:01,304
What the fuck are you doing?

1134
01:00:01,377 --> 01:00:03,133
What Katnip would do.

1135
01:00:04,047 --> 01:00:05,139
(EXCLAIMS)

1136
01:00:05,215 --> 01:00:07,386
Okay, I'm good.
Oh, shit.

1137
01:00:08,635 --> 01:00:10,106
God damn it.

1138
01:00:35,662 --> 01:00:36,753
What?

1139
01:00:40,166 --> 01:00:41,293
What?

1140
01:00:48,425 --> 01:00:49,516
Oh.

1141
01:00:51,636 --> 01:00:52,680
Hi.

1142
01:00:56,057 --> 01:00:58,442
You mind if I just grab a weapon?

1143
01:01:09,154 --> 01:01:10,328
(SCREAMS)

1144
01:01:12,365 --> 01:01:14,619
It's too bad you couldn't
help your friend.

1145
01:01:14,701 --> 01:01:16,254
A generic straight man.
What was his name?

1146
01:01:16,327 --> 01:01:17,419
Doug.

1147
01:01:17,662 --> 01:01:19,667
And he's not a straight man.

1148
01:01:19,831 --> 01:01:22,679
Well, he's probably long dead.

1149
01:01:22,834 --> 01:01:24,008
And soon,

1150
01:01:24,085 --> 01:01:27,015
you'll be long dead, too.

1151
01:01:28,506 --> 01:01:29,598
(SCREAMING)

1152
01:01:30,008 --> 01:01:31,561
This is for threatening my friend!

1153
01:01:31,843 --> 01:01:34,180
This is for being a bitch
to me in the woods!

1154
01:01:34,304 --> 01:01:36,309
This is for calling my
hometown "Podunk"!

1155
01:01:36,389 --> 01:01:38,857
<i>This is for not returning my sexts!</i>

1156
01:01:38,933 --> 01:01:42,066
And this is for ruining the prom!

1157
01:01:42,729 --> 01:01:43,939
Yeah!

1158
01:01:45,440 --> 01:01:47,243
Holy fucking shit.

1159
01:01:47,317 --> 01:01:49,536
You just brutally
murdered a young girl.

1160
01:01:49,819 --> 01:01:50,863
Yeah.

1161
01:01:50,945 --> 01:01:53,626
And the weird thing is I thought
it would take more hits.

1162
01:01:53,698 --> 01:01:55,501
But I guess you live and learn.

1163
01:01:55,867 --> 01:01:59,165
Or at least, she doesn't.
Am I right? Am I right?

1164
01:01:59,245 --> 01:02:00,337
Yeah, whatever you say.

1165
01:02:00,413 --> 01:02:01,505
Of course.

1166
01:02:02,082 --> 01:02:05,428
All right, look, we can still
get out of this thing.

1167
01:02:05,502 --> 01:02:07,673
We just gotta get this
bromance thing back in gear.

1168
01:02:07,754 --> 01:02:09,889
Oh, be careful! Oh, Jesus.

1169
01:02:11,549 --> 01:02:15,061
If you were Doug,
where would you be?

1170
01:02:15,261 --> 01:02:17,681
Maybe these guys
can help us find him.

1171
01:02:20,100 --> 01:02:21,772
Hey, little buddies.

1172
01:02:22,727 --> 01:02:24,649
How are my favourite
imitation puppets doing?

1173
01:02:24,729 --> 01:02:26,989
Oh, fuck! My hammie, again!
Kick his ass!

1174
01:02:27,065 --> 01:02:28,488
Let's fuck him up!

1175
01:02:28,650 --> 01:02:31,580
Wait, wait! I thought you puppets
were the good guys! What the fuck?

1176
01:02:31,903 --> 01:02:33,457
We used to be.

1177
01:02:33,530 --> 01:02:36,210
Yeah, but now we've
stared death in the face.

1178
01:02:36,741 --> 01:02:40,710
We've seen the depths of human suffering.
And we're already dead inside.

1179
01:02:40,787 --> 01:02:41,879
Yeah.

1180
01:02:41,955 --> 01:02:42,998
That's awful.

1181
01:02:43,123 --> 01:02:44,166
My God, I'm sorry.

1182
01:02:44,249 --> 01:02:47,214
Come on, you bitch!
Yeah, you scared coward!

1183
01:02:47,293 --> 01:02:49,381
You're not man
enough to fuck with me!

1184
01:02:49,462 --> 01:02:51,763
You wouldn't last two minutes
in my world, you bitch!

1185
01:02:51,923 --> 01:02:53,726
Is that the Mike Tyson rant?

1186
01:02:53,842 --> 01:02:55,644
Fuck you.
Fuck you, you ho.

1187
01:02:55,760 --> 01:02:59,107
I'll fuck your ass in front of everybody!
Yeah, that's definitely the Tyson.

1188
01:02:59,597 --> 01:03:01,353
Enough talk!
Kill them!

1189
01:03:02,267 --> 01:03:03,857
(ALL CLAMOURING)

1190
01:03:10,483 --> 01:03:12,037
(SCREAMING)

1191
01:03:26,499 --> 01:03:28,919
A mine is a terrible
thing to waste.

1192
01:03:30,003 --> 01:03:31,889
That was actually
a pretty good one, Zach.

1193
01:03:31,963 --> 01:03:33,007
Yeah?
Yeah.

1194
01:03:33,131 --> 01:03:35,053
At least that was
just my reader copy.

1195
01:03:35,133 --> 01:03:36,889
Guys, a little help?

1196
01:03:36,968 --> 01:03:39,519
You four-eyed fuck.
You see this coming?

1197
01:03:40,638 --> 01:03:41,682
(SCREAMS)

1198
01:03:43,099 --> 01:03:45,187
Fuck me!
Right in the smarts!

1199
01:03:45,810 --> 01:03:47,447
That's painful!

1200
01:03:47,520 --> 01:03:48,813
But also hilarious.

1201
01:03:48,980 --> 01:03:50,321
(MOANING)

1202
01:03:55,612 --> 01:03:57,165
That's my girl!

1203
01:04:05,830 --> 01:04:07,670
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God, you're hurt!

1204
01:04:08,208 --> 01:04:10,379
You should see the other guy.

1205
01:04:10,460 --> 01:04:11,552
You killed Tonto?

1206
01:04:11,628 --> 01:04:12,671
Yeah.

1207
01:04:12,754 --> 01:04:15,803
Come on, we need to get you in the shade.
Can you walk?

1208
01:04:15,882 --> 01:04:18,979
It's okay, I got you.
I got you, I got you.

1209
01:04:19,677 --> 01:04:21,231
Move! Move!

1210
01:04:21,679 --> 01:04:22,723
It's okay.

1211
01:04:23,473 --> 01:04:25,774
You all right?
You're gonna be okay.

1212
01:04:25,850 --> 01:04:28,318
It's okay, I got you.
I got you.

1213
01:04:28,686 --> 01:04:31,155
I got you. There you go.

1214
01:04:31,856 --> 01:04:34,870
You're gonna be okay. It's all
right, it's not that bad.

1215
01:04:35,193 --> 01:04:36,996
(SHUSHING)
Ed, it's okay.

1216
01:04:37,070 --> 01:04:39,157
No, no, no, it's not okay!
You need help.

1217
01:04:39,239 --> 01:04:41,919
Ed, one of us had to die.

1218
01:04:42,409 --> 01:04:43,583
Well, I wish it was me.

1219
01:04:43,701 --> 01:04:44,912
Me, too.

1220
01:04:45,370 --> 01:04:46,497
What?

1221
01:04:46,579 --> 01:04:47,623
Sorry.

1222
01:04:47,705 --> 01:04:50,126
That slipped out. Sorry.
Yeah, that came out real fast.

1223
01:04:50,208 --> 01:04:51,679
It's okay.

1224
01:04:51,751 --> 01:04:52,795
Um...

1225
01:04:52,877 --> 01:04:54,051
Speaking of,

1226
01:04:55,088 --> 01:04:56,215
since...

1227
01:04:56,589 --> 01:05:01,560
Since this is it for me,
do you want to see them?

1228
01:05:02,887 --> 01:05:04,145
See what?

1229
01:05:05,557 --> 01:05:07,562
My boobs, dummy.

1230
01:05:09,936 --> 01:05:10,980
I...

1231
01:05:11,271 --> 01:05:13,607
I would. Very much.

1232
01:05:14,149 --> 01:05:15,240
Okay.

1233
01:05:18,445 --> 01:05:20,284
I know you've been
waiting for this.

1234
01:05:30,290 --> 01:05:31,796
Pretty nice, huh?

1235
01:05:32,292 --> 01:05:33,798
Unbelievable.

1236
01:05:35,295 --> 01:05:36,422
Wow.

1237
01:05:36,963 --> 01:05:38,553
No tan lines.

1238
01:05:38,757 --> 01:05:40,844
Unbelievable.

1239
01:05:41,551 --> 01:05:44,932
But if he'd move a little bit,
I could see them better.

1240
01:05:45,472 --> 01:05:47,144
Ed?
Yeah, yeah.

1241
01:05:48,892 --> 01:05:52,071
The light is starting to fade.

1242
01:05:53,938 --> 01:05:57,284
Will you look deep into
my eyes as I fade away?

1243
01:05:58,735 --> 01:06:00,491
Absolutely, Katnip.

1244
01:06:07,285 --> 01:06:08,626
Ed, up here.

1245
01:06:08,745 --> 01:06:10,086
Yeah? I'm sorry. I love them.

1246
01:06:10,163 --> 01:06:12,666
I mean, I love you.
I love all of you.

1247
01:06:13,958 --> 01:06:15,251
I know.

1248
01:06:16,503 --> 01:06:17,630
Goodbye.

1249
01:06:19,297 --> 01:06:20,341
I'll...

1250
01:06:21,758 --> 01:06:23,728
I'll see you soon enough.

1251
01:06:25,720 --> 01:06:26,978
Okay.

1252
01:06:34,145 --> 01:06:35,818
Wait, what's that supposed to mean?

1253
01:06:35,897 --> 01:06:37,024
Katnip?

1254
01:06:37,107 --> 01:06:39,990
Hey, do you know something
I don't? Am I next?

1255
01:06:40,110 --> 01:06:41,663
(CANNON BLAST)

1256
01:06:49,369 --> 01:06:51,041
Yeah, she's dead, that'd be weird.

1257
01:06:51,121 --> 01:06:52,663
That'd be weird. I'm sorry.

1258
01:06:59,337 --> 01:07:01,757
I think it's time we made the call.

1259
01:07:10,515 --> 01:07:11,856
(PHONE RINGING)

1260
01:07:17,856 --> 01:07:19,327
Tracey, it's Bradley.

1261
01:07:19,441 --> 01:07:23,154
<i>MAN: I don't know who you
are or what you want.</i>

1262
01:07:23,236 --> 01:07:25,573
Fuck, I think I dialled
the wrong number.

1263
01:07:25,655 --> 01:07:29,748
<i>What I do have are
a particular set of skills.</i>

1264
01:07:30,368 --> 01:07:32,954
<i>If you give my daughter
back to me now,</i>

1265
01:07:33,496 --> 01:07:35,050
that'll be the end of it.

1266
01:07:35,331 --> 01:07:36,719
<i>But if you don't...</i>

1267
01:07:36,791 --> 01:07:37,835
Okay.

1268
01:07:37,917 --> 01:07:38,961
<i>I will...</i>
(ENDS CALL)

1269
01:07:39,085 --> 01:07:40,296
Crazy.

1270
01:07:41,379 --> 01:07:43,930
Definitely not Tracey.
Let me try again.

1271
01:07:44,215 --> 01:07:45,389
(PHONE RINGING)

1272
01:07:50,180 --> 01:07:51,223
<i>Hello?</i>

1273
01:07:51,306 --> 01:07:52,349
Tracey, it's Bradley.

1274
01:07:53,391 --> 01:07:55,313
Hey, man, what's wrong?

1275
01:07:56,436 --> 01:07:58,156
I don't know.

1276
01:07:58,229 --> 01:08:00,697
The first girl lever
loved just died.

1277
01:08:00,774 --> 01:08:03,988
I watched you murder a girl
with your bare hands.

1278
01:08:04,069 --> 01:08:05,622
We're as good as dead.

1279
01:08:05,695 --> 01:08:08,910
And the worst part is
we lost our best friend.

1280
01:08:08,990 --> 01:08:10,663
That's what's wrong.

1281
01:08:11,868 --> 01:08:15,249
I can't help but accept some
responsibility for this.

1282
01:08:15,413 --> 01:08:17,750
Yeah, no, I blame you
for the majority of it.

1283
01:08:17,874 --> 01:08:21,505
Seriously? I mucked
up the bachelor party.

1284
01:08:21,586 --> 01:08:24,635
I got us stuck in some
weird alternate universe.

1285
01:08:25,256 --> 01:08:27,842
This whole thing just went
right down the tubes!

1286
01:08:28,134 --> 01:08:31,646
I didn't even get to be a part
of the Human effing Centipede.

1287
01:08:32,806 --> 01:08:34,359
What did you just say?

1288
01:08:34,432 --> 01:08:36,603
I don't care how awkward it is,

1289
01:08:36,768 --> 01:08:38,939
sharing a gastric system
is a life experience.

1290
01:08:39,145 --> 01:08:41,067
I could have scrapbooked about it.

1291
01:08:41,147 --> 01:08:42,987
No, no, before that.

1292
01:08:43,817 --> 01:08:47,957
This whole thing
went down the tubes.

1293
01:08:54,285 --> 01:08:55,329
Doug!

1294
01:08:56,788 --> 01:08:58,460
Are you having a flashback montage?

1295
01:08:59,958 --> 01:09:02,923
The tubes! I know
where Doug is! Bradley!

1296
01:09:03,128 --> 01:09:04,219
<i>Where are you guys?
What's going on?</i>

1297
01:09:04,337 --> 01:09:05,464
Bradley!

1298
01:09:06,965 --> 01:09:08,851
Bradley? Bradley?

1299
01:09:08,967 --> 01:09:10,141
<i>Bradley? Bradley?</i>

1300
01:09:10,677 --> 01:09:12,230
Hey, Tracey! It's Ed!

1301
01:09:12,303 --> 01:09:16,610
Ed! Ed, what in the H-E-double
hockey sticks is going on?

1302
01:09:16,683 --> 01:09:18,688
We're gonna go pick
up Doug right now,

1303
01:09:18,768 --> 01:09:21,782
<i>so don't you worry your pretty
little man face about it.</i>

1304
01:09:21,855 --> 01:09:23,776
Okay, but we gotta go.
We'll see you real soon, bye!

1305
01:09:23,857 --> 01:09:25,244
What the fuck, man?

1306
01:09:25,316 --> 01:09:27,238
I know where Doug is!
Come on! Go!

1307
01:09:27,318 --> 01:09:29,074
Let's go, let's go!

1308
01:09:29,946 --> 01:09:32,331
Hello? Hello?

1309
01:09:34,993 --> 01:09:37,619
This is it!
Doug's tube never came up!

1310
01:09:40,165 --> 01:09:41,339
What?

1311
01:09:41,875 --> 01:09:44,639
Well, if he's not down there,
where the hell is he?

1312
01:09:45,795 --> 01:09:47,765
Okay, let's face it.

1313
01:09:47,839 --> 01:09:48,931
Doug's not in the tube.

1314
01:09:49,007 --> 01:09:51,890
There was no sign of him in the arena.
He is gone.

1315
01:09:51,968 --> 01:09:53,142
That is a fact.

1316
01:09:53,219 --> 01:09:55,937
You fucking idiots!

1317
01:09:58,349 --> 01:09:59,642
(ALL GROANING)

1318
01:09:59,726 --> 01:10:01,019
God fucking damn it!

1319
01:10:01,144 --> 01:10:02,401
Jesus!

1320
01:10:02,645 --> 01:10:05,030
That bush is angry!

1321
01:10:05,356 --> 01:10:08,286
I'm not "that bush," you
bearded piece of afterbirth!

1322
01:10:08,359 --> 01:10:09,652
It's me! Doug!

1323
01:10:09,778 --> 01:10:11,415
(ALL EXCLAIMING)

1324
01:10:12,197 --> 01:10:14,533
Shut up! All you guys,
just shut the fuck up!

1325
01:10:15,533 --> 01:10:19,544
You guys forget me
all the fucking time!

1326
01:10:19,662 --> 01:10:22,676
In Vegas! In this fucked-up
alternate universe!

1327
01:10:22,749 --> 01:10:24,256
Yeah.

1328
01:10:24,375 --> 01:10:26,003
I'm barely in the
goddamn movie trailer!

1329
01:10:26,044 --> 01:10:28,464
It's true, I don't even
think he's on the poster.

1330
01:10:28,546 --> 01:10:30,634
I never get any punchlines,

1331
01:10:30,715 --> 01:10:35,769
and you keep leaving me
in enclosed fucking places!

1332
01:10:36,137 --> 01:10:39,934
You think maybe we can talk to
you about this at sea level?

1333
01:10:40,016 --> 01:10:41,487
Not this time.

1334
01:10:42,936 --> 01:10:45,866
This time, I get the last laugh.

1335
01:10:46,022 --> 01:10:48,158
Jeez, dude!
Wait, wait, wait!

1336
01:10:48,233 --> 01:10:50,569
You're right!
You're right! We're sorry.

1337
01:10:50,693 --> 01:10:52,615
<i>We haven't given
you your proper due.</i>

1338
01:10:52,779 --> 01:10:56,077
You are the perfect blend
of handsome and humourless.

1339
01:10:56,282 --> 01:10:58,003
Without you, there are no jokes.

1340
01:10:58,118 --> 01:10:59,838
Hell, without you, there is no us.

1341
01:11:00,245 --> 01:11:01,917
You may be a gay man,

1342
01:11:02,789 --> 01:11:06,253
but you are the best damn
straight man we've ever met.

1343
01:11:10,755 --> 01:11:11,799
Ah!

1344
01:11:12,632 --> 01:11:14,768
I could never murder you guys.

1345
01:11:14,843 --> 01:11:15,970
(ALL SIGH)

1346
01:11:16,052 --> 01:11:17,096
You!

1347
01:11:17,262 --> 01:11:18,305
Wait here one second.

1348
01:11:19,431 --> 01:11:20,984
(ALL GRUNTING)

1349
01:11:23,601 --> 01:11:25,108
You guys!

1350
01:11:25,311 --> 01:11:26,902
That worked great!

1351
01:11:27,480 --> 01:11:29,817
I'm so glad you're alive, man!

1352
01:11:29,983 --> 01:11:31,620
Bradley, bring it in!

1353
01:11:35,905 --> 01:11:38,539
You guys, this is just perfect.

1354
01:11:38,616 --> 01:11:41,250
Nothing could possibly
ruin this moment.

1355
01:11:41,661 --> 01:11:44,046
MAN OVER PA:
Hello out there, everybody.

1356
01:11:44,122 --> 01:11:46,423
<i>Hey, remember that earlier</i>

1357
01:11:46,499 --> 01:11:49,003
<i>"bromance revision"
I was telling you guys about?</i>

1358
01:11:49,085 --> 01:11:51,304
<i>Well, you can forget about that.</i>

1359
01:11:51,379 --> 01:11:54,725
There's only gonna be one
winner of the Hungover Games.

1360
01:11:54,883 --> 01:11:59,771
So if you're a foursome of dudes
who recently bro-conciled,

1361
01:12:00,096 --> 01:12:01,769
<i>you're gonna have
to kill each other.</i>

1362
01:12:01,848 --> 01:12:03,485
<i>You're just gonna have
to fight to the death.</i>

1363
01:12:03,641 --> 01:12:06,145
I'm sorry, I don't
make up the rules.

1364
01:12:06,227 --> 01:12:08,315
Wait, I do.

1365
01:12:08,521 --> 01:12:10,443
I do make up the rules.

1366
01:12:10,523 --> 01:12:12,363
<i>Suckers!</i>

1367
01:12:12,525 --> 01:12:15,243
Well, good luck and
may the odds be forever

1368
01:12:15,361 --> 01:12:18,126
in your blah-blah-blah,
et cetera, et cetera.

1369
01:12:18,698 --> 01:12:20,335
This is gonna be good.

1370
01:12:21,326 --> 01:12:23,129
Nope. No way.

1371
01:12:26,998 --> 01:12:28,884
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

1372
01:13:02,909 --> 01:13:05,792
Wait, why are all these
weapons shaped like dicks?

1373
01:13:07,330 --> 01:13:10,011
All right, listen, guys. Listen up.
Let's talk about this.

1374
01:13:10,083 --> 01:13:12,669
I can't die now.
I'm about to get married.

1375
01:13:12,752 --> 01:13:14,555
I have a wife and kids at home.

1376
01:13:14,712 --> 01:13:17,560
I just lost Katnip!
She was my everything.

1377
01:13:17,632 --> 01:13:19,055
She was also very much underage.

1378
01:13:19,175 --> 01:13:20,563
DOUG: Seriously?

1379
01:13:20,718 --> 01:13:24,729
Ed, buddy, there are laws against that.
You can't statutory rape your soulmate.

1380
01:13:24,848 --> 01:13:28,110
Jeepers creepers!
You guys, don't you remember?

1381
01:13:28,226 --> 01:13:29,400
We're a brotherhood!

1382
01:13:29,561 --> 01:13:31,696
You heard the announcement.
It's every man for himself.

1383
01:13:31,771 --> 01:13:34,239
No! I have an idea.

1384
01:13:34,732 --> 01:13:36,370
We all need to eat these.

1385
01:13:36,443 --> 01:13:38,738
They're Midnight Berries.
It's the only way to end this.

1386
01:13:38,945 --> 01:13:41,365
That is what got us into this
mess in the first place.

1387
01:13:41,448 --> 01:13:43,666
Yeah, these berries would kill us.

1388
01:13:43,742 --> 01:13:46,838
But the Capitol won't
even let us swallow them.

1389
01:13:46,995 --> 01:13:49,878
They'd rather have four
winners than no winner.

1390
01:13:49,956 --> 01:13:52,341
So before we even
get these in our mouths

1391
01:13:52,417 --> 01:13:54,173
they'll cancel the whole thing.

1392
01:13:54,252 --> 01:13:56,055
You have to trust me.

1393
01:13:56,129 --> 01:13:57,386
Absolutely not.

1394
01:13:57,464 --> 01:14:00,097
Doubt me all you want,
but don't doubt

1395
01:14:00,216 --> 01:14:02,802
my knowledge of
young adult fiction.

1396
01:14:07,432 --> 01:14:08,476
I'm in.

1397
01:14:08,641 --> 01:14:09,733
What?

1398
01:14:10,477 --> 01:14:11,604
Me, too.

1399
01:14:12,437 --> 01:14:13,611
Really?

1400
01:14:16,483 --> 01:14:17,693
Fine.

1401
01:14:19,152 --> 01:14:20,445
Me, too. I'm in.

1402
01:14:22,697 --> 01:14:24,500
But only because
I love you guys.

1403
01:14:24,991 --> 01:14:26,118
Okay.

1404
01:14:27,118 --> 01:14:28,958
On the count of three.

1405
01:14:30,622 --> 01:14:31,665
One.

1406
01:14:31,873 --> 01:14:33,000
Two.

1407
01:14:33,249 --> 01:14:34,590
Three.

1408
01:14:44,469 --> 01:14:46,272
What do we do now?

1409
01:14:54,687 --> 01:14:56,657
Come on!
Kinda tasty.

1410
01:15:00,026 --> 01:15:01,319
(GAGGING)

1411
01:15:02,487 --> 01:15:05,999
Zach, you dumb motherfucker!

1412
01:15:18,336 --> 01:15:19,724
What the...

1413
01:15:20,213 --> 01:15:21,305
Morning.

1414
01:15:21,673 --> 01:15:22,883
You guys sleep well?

1415
01:15:22,966 --> 01:15:24,093
Yeah.

1416
01:15:24,300 --> 01:15:25,688
Pretty well.

1417
01:15:27,595 --> 01:15:29,351
Anyone have floss?

1418
01:15:29,681 --> 01:15:32,694
I think I've got Midnight Berry
seeds stuck in my teeth.

1419
01:15:33,351 --> 01:15:34,525
Wait, wait.
What time is it?

1420
01:15:36,062 --> 01:15:37,485
It's 10:00 a.m.

1421
01:15:37,605 --> 01:15:39,029
We'll never make the wedding.

1422
01:15:39,732 --> 01:15:40,824
Wanna bet?

1423
01:15:42,694 --> 01:15:46,122
You guys think you can take me
out of the straitjacket now?

1424
01:15:46,531 --> 01:15:49,496
Guys, I am just so pumped to be
a real member of this group.

1425
01:15:49,576 --> 01:15:52,043
It's so cool you're gonna let me
have more lines in the next movie.

1426
01:15:52,120 --> 01:15:53,377
That's right, yeah.
Totally gonna happen.

1427
01:15:53,455 --> 01:15:57,083
Yeah, more lines, definitely.
(TYRES SCREECH)

1428
01:15:57,917 --> 01:16:00,717
Come with me if you want
to attend a gay wedding.

1429
01:16:03,423 --> 01:16:06,721
Sorry. Getting here
was a real bloodbath.

1430
01:16:07,093 --> 01:16:08,564
What the fucksticks, you guys?

1431
01:16:08,636 --> 01:16:09,728
Honey,

1432
01:16:09,804 --> 01:16:12,023
I am so, so, so sorry.

1433
01:16:12,182 --> 01:16:15,230
You had better have a good
explanation for this.

1434
01:16:15,602 --> 01:16:18,485
Trace, the last three days
were, without a doubt,

1435
01:16:18,563 --> 01:16:22,822
the most backwards, fucked up,
inexplicable experience of my entire life.

1436
01:16:22,984 --> 01:16:25,120
I saw brutal death.

1437
01:16:25,653 --> 01:16:29,331
I saw murderous talking
puppets. I saw gay Thor.

1438
01:16:30,492 --> 01:16:32,544
But all I could think about was you.

1439
01:16:34,287 --> 01:16:35,924
Can you forgive me?

1440
01:16:37,373 --> 01:16:38,584
Well,

1441
01:16:40,919 --> 01:16:42,924
boys will be boys.

1442
01:16:47,383 --> 01:16:49,887
So are we gonna
talk about last night?

1443
01:16:50,303 --> 01:16:51,430
Okay.

1444
01:16:51,930 --> 01:16:54,767
Whatever the hell we think happened,
it obviously didn't really happen.

1445
01:16:54,808 --> 01:16:57,572
Zach just got in our heads
with that dumb book of his,

1446
01:16:57,644 --> 01:17:00,230
so just forget about it
and move on.

1447
01:17:00,605 --> 01:17:04,152
I'm over it, too. I'm onto
<i>Fifty Shades now.</i>

1448
01:17:05,110 --> 01:17:07,827
This rich guy is erotic.

1449
01:17:08,988 --> 01:17:11,159
You know what?
You guys are wrong.

1450
01:17:11,241 --> 01:17:13,246
Over the course of
one day, I loved,

1451
01:17:13,326 --> 01:17:16,838
I lost, and I almost died,
like, 10 times.

1452
01:17:16,996 --> 01:17:18,633
You also ate a boatload of shit.

1453
01:17:18,706 --> 01:17:20,094
Thank you for the reminder.

1454
01:17:20,166 --> 01:17:22,385
But thankfully, it wasn't real.

1455
01:17:22,460 --> 01:17:23,931
You gotta let it go, man.

1456
01:17:24,003 --> 01:17:26,589
You know what?
You can believe what you want,

1457
01:17:26,673 --> 01:17:29,887
but I know my connection
with that girl was real.

1458
01:17:30,969 --> 01:17:33,140
There's a lot of wiener
in this book.

1459
01:17:33,888 --> 01:17:36,143
But I'm not mad about it.

1460
01:17:36,808 --> 01:17:40,984
This probably would make
a really good TV movie.

1461
01:17:43,022 --> 01:17:45,193
Get Alyssa Milano.

1462
01:17:47,777 --> 01:17:48,904
Oh.

1463
01:17:48,987 --> 01:17:50,493
Sorry.

1464
01:17:50,655 --> 01:17:52,162
So sorry about that.
It's been a bit of a...

1465
01:17:52,240 --> 01:17:53,663
Don't worry about it.

1466
01:17:56,703 --> 01:17:58,174
Wedding's that way.

1467
01:17:58,830 --> 01:18:00,087
(LAUGHS)

1468
01:18:00,415 --> 01:18:03,547
Well, it was nice bumping into you.

1469
01:18:09,048 --> 01:18:10,223
Hey, bud.

1470
01:18:11,009 --> 01:18:12,219
We gotta go.

1471
01:18:12,302 --> 01:18:13,892
I know. Do you...

1472
01:18:14,471 --> 01:18:16,440
What are you stammering about?

1473
01:18:16,723 --> 01:18:20,484
MAN: We are gathered here
today to celebrate the pure

1474
01:18:21,144 --> 01:18:23,030
and magical love of

1475
01:18:23,146 --> 01:18:26,989
these two deeply,
deeply passionate men.

1476
01:18:27,525 --> 01:18:30,823
Guys, that's her. I swear
to God, she's right there.

1477
01:18:30,904 --> 01:18:32,457
Stop, man. There is no her.

1478
01:18:32,530 --> 01:18:34,417
Yeah...
Do I need to set you up with a shrink?

1479
01:18:34,491 --> 01:18:35,534
I'm telling you, she's...

1480
01:18:35,617 --> 01:18:36,660
Dude.

1481
01:18:36,743 --> 01:18:38,084
Enough.
Fine.

1482
01:18:38,453 --> 01:18:39,876
Letting it go.

1483
01:18:40,163 --> 01:18:41,883
Thank you.
MAN: Some people say

1484
01:18:42,916 --> 01:18:44,885
love is nothing but a battlefield.

1485
01:18:45,502 --> 01:18:46,712
Not me.

1486
01:18:47,045 --> 01:18:50,676
These days, people don't view
marriage as something to enjoy.

1487
01:18:50,840 --> 01:18:54,055
They view it as
something to survive.

1488
01:18:54,219 --> 01:18:56,722
So Doug, Tracey,

1489
01:18:56,888 --> 01:18:58,727
with that, I say

1490
01:18:58,890 --> 01:19:03,446
may the odds be
ever in your favour.

1491
01:19:05,730 --> 01:19:07,616
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

1492
01:25:01,252 --> 01:25:03,257
This tree has a vagina.

1493
01:25:07,092 --> 01:25:08,479
(LAUGHING)