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Good.
[Uncle Nick] Cleveland City Stadium.
Damaged land on June 24, 1930.
Three million dollars the facility was officially opened
more than a year later,
and be home to Cleveland Indians
and Chief Wahoo.
Indians win World Series on & apos; 48,
and win America League pennies on & apos; 54.
Browns are a champion team.
Local DJ Alan Freed was introduced to the world to Rock and Roll.
Cleveland A great place to stay.
[cracking thunder] Then the slump comes in.
Several decades of heartbreak.
Bad trade and bad luck.
Curse of Rocky Colavito.
On & apos; 69, Cuyahoga River burned,
and the story is made Time magazine
The incident turned to Cleveland to the worst joke...
a joke.
This city has increased an interesting slogan:
"Mistakes on the Lake."
[wind blowing]
[strange music]
N & apos;
[voice-mail] - Hi, Nick, this is Fairview
Senior Care Call
Your mother feels tired today
We don't think he must come out cold.
We are paging doctors. Nothing to worry about.
He said he would call you in the morning
- Hey what happened, amigo?
Yes, I need you to vaminos to my house,
take me to my brother's place
Come on, man.
It's Christmas Eve, not Christmas
Merry Christmas!
Hey, Valerie.
What is crack-a-lackin & apos ;, girl?
[sniff]
Yes. Yes, you can on the hour.
Good.
Gracias.
Not on that shirt.
[car horn horn]
- Hey what happened?
- Hey, Luis.
- So where does your sister live? - In that donkey-rich old house near Lakewood Park.
- Oh, there are some very nice houses there
- He definitely doesn't pay for him, believe me.
- Prizes.
- Hah. Thank you, Luis.
You're my number 1
And I am your Single Number Boss.
[Uncle Nick] - Family business keeps me going
Father started Wilkins Landscape with a lawn mower,
a pickup truck, and dream.
Now 40 years later his business is still alive but barely.
- Bets you never give this your boss in Mexico
- Puerto Rico.
- The same thing.
- This is not.
- Yes, that's the case.
- This is a commonwealth from the United States.
- What?
[strange music]
N & apos;
- Must get a prize first, Luis.
Oh!
Blue Ribbon
Everyone needs blue ribbons once in a while.
They have teenagers boys at home
Children love flashlights. They are crazy because of them.
Blank VHS.
Who doesn't like blank VHS?
Nobody.
That's for prizes.
OK, let's party.
- good? - Yeah.
- I need something that a girl will drink,
something with a little punch for that
Oh, Luis, you have a daughter
He drinks things like this?
- Oh, he doesn't drink He is only 12 years old.
- He is drinking
Believe me, they all drink.
- Maybe
- One last thing.
- Women like this Fire and ice goods
- Yeah.
- Good.
This will be an awesome night.
[Uncle Nick] - June 4, 1974,
Cleveland Indians where is scheduled to take
Texas Rangers.
That year, attendance at Stadium Kota on average
8,000 people who play games,
but tonight more than 25,000 will appear.
They come with beer 10 cents.
Management thinking this promotion
will be a good way to increase attendance.
Who can say no a cup of drinks for a dime?
You can buy up to 6 pounds of beer at a time.
There is no cutoff.
Indians have playing Rangers
six days before in Texas.
There are fights in the field and many hard feelings.
But true anger is brewing in the stands.
Rangers are needed to be taught lessons.
Cleveland residents have been kicked in the intestine
too long
Tonight they will fight.
[Christmas music]
N & apos;
- Marcus!
- What?
- Pause your game and enter here
- I can't just stop for a while, I'm playing online.
Damn nonsense!
_ Hey, language!
- I'll be there when the match is over
- So please help me, god if I come there and you still play that thing...
[Uncle Nick] - Sophie.
He ended his marriage
so he can husband trophy:
my stupid brother
- Oh, no, baby,
You will not use tonight, right?
- I have to advertise my clothes design
Get news, get paid.
[Uncle Nick] - God, I hate my brother
I hate everything about him.
He is a family baby,
crash,
who always glides with in appearance and charm.
- Can you use the good one? shirt like a normal husband?
It's Christmas Eve.
_ Good-
[Uncle Nick] - And now I have to go there
and celebrate it Christmas with him
and his wife who is rich in new cougar.
I prefer to be in a bar.
- Alright, okay, you can get Marcus came here
and finished making popcorn bouquets?
And he has been playing since then he woke up this morning
- Okay, let him play. I can handle the job.
- No, just leave it You will screw it up.
That is not what I mean.
Can you find Valerie? He knows how I like it.
- Good.
[Uncle Nick] - But I go there too
- To see it - Valerie?
[knock on the door]
- Hey, Val...
- Ugh, just go in, I can't hear you
- Hey, your mother, she needs help with popcorn bouquets.
- [V / O] Valerie. - Fuck bouquets of flowers
- Yes I know, is annoying, but...
[Uncle Nick] - Tonight he will be mine
- Hey, your sister Nick came today
- That's what he said
- awesome! That person is a riot.
- You talk to him?
- Yeah, sometimes on Facebook.
- Why? - Because he's a loser
- You sound jealous
- Jealousy because of drunk who gets DUI
in front of his own house?
I don't think so.
- Santa here
You need to lock your door!
[Uncle Nick] - Look at this house
It must be nice marry money
- Oh, Nick
Hi!
Um, I don't hear the doorbell sounds
and you are earlier
Um, dinner at 6 o'clock. This is 3.
- We are family now
- Oh.
Uhh... ugh... well...
I can take your coat
- Well, I'm fine.
Hey, doc, I got a question.
Um, I have this little pain
and then the skin feels tight
and strange and there are, like, indentations
- Um, that's a stretch sign. Your weight increases.
- awesome
Save me co-pay.
- There is a difference between sales of pharmaceuticals and become a doctor.
- Can you sell me some Vicodin?
- No.
- What about a little Viagra?
For a friend.
- Okay, I go to let you get there
- I have to check on the cake
♪ Joy for the world
♪ God is coming
♪ Let the Earth accept the King
- Uncle Nick!
- Hey girl.
What is crack-a-lackin & apos;...?
- Ugh, I just made this popcorn bouquet
So, uh, what is in the bag?
- These are just a few gifts for White Elephants...
and some drinks for adults
- I'm an adult
- No, not really Think about it.
- But mother, this is Christmas
- Yeah. Come on, Mom.
- I'm sorry, I said no.
- What about wine with dinner?
- Yeah. Daddy let me drink a glass.
- Well, why don't you? go to his house?
If you want to shop Christmas Eve with your father
not your family, be my guest
- Father is my family
- You know what I mean.
- Whoa, whoa, woman,
let's save the battle When we're all drunk, huh?
- Nick, please
[strange music] [crowd cheers]
N & apos;
[Uncle Nick] - Before the game has even begun,
firecrackers and smoke bombs depart in the stands.
Blurry and blurry clouds start float above game participants.
They are drinking cheap beer
and make them own entertainment
First person to run in the field
is a big woman with enough breasts.
The crowd likes it.
He tried to do in referee Nestor Chilack.
He refused his love.
That's just the first look nudity from the crowd.
Streaker is found interesting way
to get some painful blisters.
- big house, man
This is similar to Pottery Barn
messed up Restoration Hardware here.
In a good way.
I hope we have enough.
For fathers
- for fathers
[tinkling glass]
- What's the problem, you can't return them again?
- Oh, funny parents
- Well, brother,
where do you store it the fruit you drink?
- Got a little wine cellar in the basement,
if that's what you mean
- Dude, what's the matter? Is that tannin?
- This is complicated.
- Maybe you can explain it to me
like me some dry-up Lakewood hag.
- I don't work at wine bars anymore
- Oh that's right,
You are a housewife now.
Is it like when you use it to stay home from school
and sit all day watch The Price Is Right,
fucking sofa?
"Uh, uh... Take it, Plinko!
Work with the axis, Bob Barker, do the axis!"
- You really go to make me regret
invite you today, huh?
- Maybe
- Good, then like my marriage
- I don't remember your marriage.
[muffled dance music]
N & apos;
- "This is how we do it..."
[Uncle Nick] - I remember everything.
- Continue together, okay?
This is our first real Christmas as a family.
[strange music]
N & apos;
- Oh, uh, Nick
Put it
- I will when I found an ashtray.
- No, no, um... No, no, this is a smoke-free house
so I'm sorry... ugh...
but if you have to smoke you have to go out.
- I'll freeze me balls come out of there
and you don't want to see me without smoking
It's like this but worse.
- Okay then... You can use Cody's studio.
- Cody has a studio?
[strange music]
N & apos;
What's up
[Uncle Nick] - The latest in long lines
my brother's career failed
And now he seems to be a t-shirt designer?
- "Futtbucker."
What is a douche?
[close the door]
- Can I bite cigarettes?
- Do you smoke?
- Of course. That makes my mother very happy.
- What is all this?
- "Co-Tees."
- No, I understand
- He, like, arranges a website and everything.
- yes? Do you like doing that?
- Yeah, this is really fun.
Maybe one day I will be on the runway in Paris.
[chuckles]
- All of these t-shirts are news for me
When did Cody start this?
- Ah, when my mother made it out of the wine bar
- He made it stop?
strange hour again and never been home
And now he can just do whatever he wants - Fuck
- Yes, of course.
Damn girl. Are you thirsty?
- Yes, don't tell my mother
- I can keep secrets
- I'm sure you can
Do you have a boyfriend?
- No.
Not really.
- Yeah, but I'm sure you have fuckbuddies, right
- I go around, I think.
What about you Do you have someone
- No.
I am not too interested in having several relationships
I just want to have fun
and don't worry about getting some jealous people upset
- Yeah. You're a smart girl
Your age Guys,
all they know how to do it is how to imitate
whatever they see in Bang Bus.
This is an epidemic.
It's all about anal sex
and blow it to some people breast of poor girl and...
ah, Jesus...
good, you... sorry
But you know what I mean?
[Uncle Nick] - Maybe I said too much.
But that's true.
- I have to go before My mother caught me.
- If you need other drinks or smoke or whatever,
You know where I am.
[Uncle Nick] - A few more drinks,
then everything will start more interesting
[strange music]
N & apos;
in the third innings,
the beer flows
and the crowds have fun.
That doesn't last long.
They are one more step
from taking a night to an unpleasant place
- Write a journal?
Blog?
[keyboard click]
You like pussy
Just make sure you are listening.
You are real speaker, Marcus.
Back and forth here is really something
- It's hard to believe that you are my uncle
You are like a strange homeless man
which is just sort of hanging around here
- Well, believe me, niece,
my asshole brother married your mother on Valentine's Day
- Can be agreed upon something: Cody is a *** Big time
What, he only, like, 15 years older than me
and he wants me call him Dad?
I have a father
He is 48, bald, and loves Browns.
Not a 31-year-old douche
who makes bad luck for life.
- Wow, you really know your talk, Marcus
So, tell me about Valerie.
- He thinks he's a model and hates my mother
- I can see it. He can challenge being a model.
He is hot enough.
- Yes right.
She is 5 & 4; 4 " and lives in Cleveland. chuckles]
- You are fine, Marcus.
You are fine.
[strange music]
N & apos;
- Oh, no, I need that for stuff
[sit-up]
Hey, you shouldn't be on the road
to nursing homes now?
- Oh yes, Mother didn't come
- What? Why?
- They say he is not feeling well so they call their doctor to come check out.
That will happen cost me more money
- good Mom will die about damn Christmas
- No, he isn't. He is just tired.
He needs rest.
- Michelle and Kevin are still coming right?
I mean, if they don't show up
I will make this all dinner for nothing
All of this...
No... I'm glad you're here, Nick.
I just hate wasting food,
and I've made dinner for eight, not five.
- I will Michelle's text. I will see what happened.
I'm sure he is fair trapped at work.
- Yeah, and I will be taken home some leftovers
- I'm sure you will
[murmuring] - "I'm sure you will do it."
[Uncle Nick] - I decided to make other whiskey on rocks
Daddy likes them.
[playing piano]
N & apos;
I have to stop thinking about Emily
or tonight will change into a complete disaster
[sighs]
[playing piano continues]
N & apos;
- You're good.
Show me how to play something?
- This is not that easy.
- Show me where to put my finger. - Good.
- Yeah.
[playing piano together]
[giggling]
[chuckles] I'm bad.
[laughs]
[distant glass fragments]
I have to check that.
- I need refill
[mobile vibrates]
[booing]
Who is Jon Miller?
[Uncle Nick] - At the bottom of the fourth inning,
Rangers pitcher Fergie Jenkins
lowered by a line drive
from bat from Cleveland Leron Lee.
The ball comes so fast,
Jenkins can't decide whether to catch it
or step aside.
He finally gets hitting directly in the intestine.
Many people appear.
Not because of concerns for injured players
but because they want more.
They want blood.
The fuse is on.
Crowd starts to simultaneously concurrent:
"Hit him harder. Hit him harder
Hit him harder."
- Hey, Cody Think fast!
- Nick!
Geez, man, You almost broke my cellphone.
[Uncle Nick] - Look at this person,
sport new clothes his wife bought it.
- Seriously, man!
[Uncle Nick] - Is that a small pecker?
- You break something here, Hostess,
will not be happy
- Man, you are whipped
You know, there is nothing better than tasty drinks.
- Hey, help us, man, don't drink too much, okay
- I'm sorry for wanting to enjoy my new mug.
- "Number One Boss."
- Impressive nonsense
That's me
You know, it should be Let's work for me, Cody.
Family affairs.
What dad always wants.
- no chance
- Does it feel like I don't have to work for a living?
- I work.
- Oh, I see your little one sensitive business
in the garage.
Oh, I'm sorry, your "studio".
- [laughs]
- What is that, Marcus?
- I don't say anything - Right. You are only back to having no life
Mind your own business.
- That's not cool, man.
- There are no men. Children love it,
they spend all their day on the internet,
they think they have the world knows.
Let me ask you something, Marcus. When...
When was the last time did you have sex?
Or better yet,
when was the last time you kissed a girl
Do you know what are you smart, Marcus?
Fill your fat face with junk food
and play video games all day
Congratulations, my dear
This will make you far away in life.
- Hey Don't listen to for that dickwad
Hey, Marcus, think fast!
- Oh, dude & apos; - Marcus!
- Continue and blame it on me.
Don't worry, okay? This is very cool.
[Uncle Nick] - I already have too many too early
[strange music]
N & apos;
What is he interested in?
- Good Tits
[mug break] Oh, damn it.
[Uncle Nick] - The liquor Caught with me too fast.
[choking] This is not good.
[vomiting]
Well, that's better.
Time for Round 2.
- You disappeared upstairs momentarily
Is everything okay?
- Do you have a boyfriend?
- No.
We discuss this, remember?
- Yeah, I know, it's just...
Ah, it's okay.
- Okay... okay, now you have to say something - Is that how it works? - Uh huh.
- I just...
When you leave me on the piano?
You leave your phone.
- Are you going to via my phone
"No!
No, I will never.
That's something creep will do it Yuck.
No, I just glance at when it lights up,
out of pure reflexes and you know.
- What did you see?
- Rude text type.
- Yeah. That.
- do you like that
- Sexting?
Sometimes yes.
- Who is this person?
"Jon?
You don't know it.
- You know, you can send me messages like that for some time
It's like an error.
Do you know what? Forget.
No , I don't even care, Like, I don't care.
But if you get bored...
I, you know, have lots of text on my phone plan
that I have never used, You know, thousands,
and it looks like rubbish, So next month...
[cellphone buzzing] two thousand, you know...
- You must get valuable money
- Damn
- Val,
You know how annoying I am when you smoke
- He doesn't. - I'm not
- Nick, are you good
- Yeah, I'm amazing
Val, enter and set the dining table.
- Will you ask Marcus to do anything, or just me?
- Now.
Hold.
Have you been drinking?
- No, okay? God!
- [sighs]
Don't damage my daughter.
- I'm not I'm a positive influence.
- Of course you are.
- But your daughter is twenty and in college.
I have to be a little of your worries
[mobile vibrates]
- Are you going to to answer that?
- No.
- You look ridiculous
[close the door] - What are you talking about?
I look like fucking & apos; Jason Statham.
I'm badass
[Uncle Nick] - I usually light up Cigarettes like this for Emily.
One for me, one for me.
I go again.
Think about that girl it's here with me now
[receive text]
Damn really real.
[click camera shutter]
- Fuck
Too cold here.
[knock on the door] Come on, man.
Just a second
[click camera shutter]
That's what I'm talking about.
[chuckles]
[knock on the door] - Speed up.
Hey, Michelle.
- Oh my God.
Do you beat him there?
[Uncle Nick] - My sister.
He has a good one seen from Cody
But my bad behavior.
- What? No, no, I have This is in my pants.
I'm good.
Eh, when are you here?
- Just now. Exit. Beater.
- Everything is yours - Eww.
- Hey, big game Sunday
- Oh, yes, yes
Give me a minute.
Come on.
Send, you're a piece of bullshit.
- What are you trying to do?
- Don't worry about that
- [sighs]
I'm sorry.
These pants give me worst camel legs
- [laughs]
- What?
- It's obscene.
They call it a deer knuckle where I come from
- My dear.
[Uncle Nick] - this is my brother-in-law is Kevin
- Thank you.
[Uncle Nick] - All he wants to talk about is the podcast.
- You are listening Beat Drum podcasts.
We will talk about baseball, especially Indian baseball.
And please start leave comments
I really want to start the dialog here
- So you are up to date on my podcast?
This is really... really starts making waves.
This inspires a lot of discussion
- Hey, I'm sorry we're very late
It's like, all these bastards come out on the last day
and those lines, like, crazy today, right, honey
- yes!
- And what's the problem with Mom?
Does he not come?
- He said he was sick or something.
- what does it mean "sick or something"?
What did he say?
- Well, the caretaker woman calls
- don't you talk to him? - No, leave a message
& apos; [booing]
- is that me
or it's weird to celebrate it Christmas here
- This is very strange I see. Strange.
Look at this room.
- You know, It's not strange.
This is a very beautiful house, and it's my house
- Come on, Cody This is his house.
What do you choose, remote?
- [laughs]
- I just feel like they have to serve us
tea and crumpets,
or maybe some lamprey pie with the queen
- Ooh, I can have some lamprey pies
Ooh, police, have you? see my cock coming out
Yes please, I am looking for my place dick.
Oh, Mom, I think I saw it on your boot.
_ Gd gloore
- You know, guys, Sophie is really stressful
so please don't make fun from his house at dinner,
good?
- You can show a little respect.
- Yes, honors Queen
- Ooh, yes, I'm Lady.
Ooh, yes, Lady.
- Sounds like a drinking dog.
- What is that, nutmeg?
[chuckles] - You can still feel it, huh?
This is my secret recipe.
Colonel no damn it to me
- Hey, Nick, I wonder if possible you want to come
If you have free time and join me for a podcast.
I want to talk to you about 10 Cent Beer Night,
everything that happens
- Maybe later.
- Yeah, I'm sure you will like it.
Hey, that's it!
- May I ask?
- Yeah. Go nuts, kid.
- Maybe we should ask his mother first
- Well, relax. It's Christmas.
- I don't know anything about this
[gasping]
- Hey, I'm still waiting for for that picture
- Yeah, well Stupid phone
How do I change this? fucking music off?
- My mother won't be like that
- Well, I don't like this
If I have to hear it "Chestnut" again,
I will bake me bad head under an open fire.
I can't torture him.
What is this?
- This is a karaoke machine.
- Yeah.
OK, let's do this
[Playing Christmas music]
N & apos;
♪ Oh, come all of you are loyal
- No. - Yes.
♪ Fun and victorious
♪ O come you, O come you to Bethlehem
♪ Come and see Him, for the Angel King
♪ O come let us adore Him, O come let us adore Him,
♪ O come let us adore Him, Christ our Lord.
- All right, well, dinner s s almost ready.
[timer dings] [vomit]
Oh!
[Uncle Nick] - As the game progresses,
Indian fans become more and more difficult to manage.
They pelted the base of the crew
with a battery from their radio,
hot dogs
First baseman basers Mike Hargrove
almost hit in the head
with half full bottles of from Thunderbird
Said drunken antics has increased
is a statement that underestimates from epic proportions
- I never drink eggnog again
- Next time you decide to steal liquor,
Don't treat it like that This is a bag of potato chips.
Have some fucking self control, Marcus.
- Hey, I don't want to use the towel
Ah, I can't watch. It's tragic.
- do you really need to do it?
- No, let's go drunk kids,
fall down the stairs, and crack their skull open?
- What about that? - We all know if anyone took the header
going down the stairs tonight it will be me right?
- Yes, you don't need to punish everyone
Dress!
- Not Christmas without... joy
- Yeah, adults can enjoy it
[wind blowing]
[U Nick Nole] - I remember how Christmas used to be:
anticipation upcoming gifts;
love and warmth
and Emily.
I hope to experience it That feeling is once again.
Rather, I spent Christmas dinner
staring at a picture from my penis
- Nick, release your phone
- This is the problem
It says the file is too large.
Yes he is.
- So, usually I will lead grace words
But I think tonight that honor must go to Cody
because this is my first family Christmas together.
- Fine, I'm a little rusty but...
Bless us, oh God, and these gifts,
that we will receive,
from your grace, through Christ our Lord.
Amen.
- Amen - Amin
- You won't thank God before eating this?
- God doesn't do nonsense. Your wife does
So thank you, Sophie.
Thank you for inviting me
and thank you for preparing this party.
Same.
Well, everyone, dig.
- There is no God!
- Jesus Christ, Marcus!
- He is also not real.
- Marcus!
Don't blaspheme!
- Don't look at me
- I lack trust must be respected
same as yours indoctrinated.
- That's it! Enough!
That's enough for you
- My hunger doesn't go to make me believe in your God
- Oh, yes, you look like you're starving
- Let the child eat with us.
Marcus, I know what you are in,
but just go with it for tonight, okay, buddy?
- Mother? - Good.
- Maybe liquor speaks
- Have you ever heard me? my latest podcast episode?
- very good
- What is your podcast about?
- Well, this is called Beat from Drum,
and this is about history from the Cleveland Indians.
In the new episode, I interviewed John Adams,
people who play drums at the stadium
during a home match in Cleveland.
And he really interesting guy
He has a stor - Well, you have to listen.
He comes to the store. That's when we meet.
He is looking for a DVD player
I set it straight.
It's on iTunes.
- I don't really follow baseball, so...
- Well, not right about baseball
It's more about what the team is, about loving something,
and proud from your hometown
- Babe, he doesn't want to listen to that This isn't...
maybe he is the thing.
- [belches]
You know, Sophie,
I have never heard the story how did you meet my brother
He and I don't do it speak for a while
and then the next thing I know You two will get married.
- Well, um.
We met him at Vino in Lakewood.
I am with a group of friends
and he recommended me this amazing cabernet
- I have a hunch he will like it
- I do it...
but I like it more.
[laughs]
- Are you with you? ex-husband when you met?
- Yes.
Well, I don't know yet what my direction is
It will be so I just thought I will take a few more
general study class, see if anyone clicks
- You must Be grateful for your parents
pay for your school
I have to go out and get a job
- The college is exaggerated.
Doesn't really help with my career
- Don't listen to him Just go. Trust me.
- Michelle is right
I went to Baldwin Wallace Conservatory and I liked it.
- Type of waste, though.
That was the decision.
If he wants to break up, he can.
- Val, what, did you break up?
- No, I mean...
Maybe, if my modeling is a career takes off
And if I break up, actually I will do it There is time to audition.
- He is very good, baby
You see a photo for a website
He is natural.
- We will talk about this later
- I would suggest that no one goes to the upstairs bathroom
at least one hour.
- I will light a candle.
- Thank you.
- Wow, I should bring sports pants here
Ugh.
- Michelle, what is your job, eh?
In the shop?
The, uh... the...
- Well, it's retail so it's terrible
- Oh.
- But we get employee discounts...
so that's something
- Yeah, our DVD collection is like... boom!
[make an explosion sound]
- do you really fall out of college
- We have, like, two walls.
One of them is Blu-ray...
- I don't know
I mean, what is the problem?
It's not like Cody graduated college
- I raised you in this big house
I help you do your homework.
What have I done wrong here?
- I think Daddy has a pretty good list
- Don't damage Christmas
- I hate it here
These are all just some big fake shows,
and I don't even remember the last time we used
this stupid dish
- This is Crate and Barrel.
They don't make better this plate.
Believe in that, little daughter.
- You know, that's not it You think it's around here,
and I really want it You know that.
There is nothing happy -
Merry Christmas, Mom.
- Nick, I forgot again,
we get a new bed delivered next week
You have to take the old one.
- Well, I'm fine.
- Oh, we insist
- If Nick doesn't want it,
we will receive it because our bed is terrible
I was stabbed with spring every night
- No, Nick must accept it. He needs it.
You know, get rid of old things there...
especially after what happened.
- I don't need a bed because I don't sleep well.
- Where do you sleep?
- On the sofa.
- Is it more comfortable?
- It's not good for your back
- I haven't slept in bed in eight years.
Has it been so long?
- Why did you stop?
- I see this girl, Emily,
and this is the first time I've been serious
with a girl in a few moments.
I am very busy with work and take care of my mother,
I just don't have time for girlfriends
I met Emily, great things
It's Christmas Eve,
and he comes
and he decides to spend the night -
- I have to go to the bathroom.
- Maybe it still smells horrible up there - I don't care I can't hear it right now.
- He died.
Emily has aneurysm in her sleep
He never knows what happened to him.
And I don't know.
I have to get up in the morning and he is very cold.
So I hold her tight, try to warm it up.
- Maybe it shouldn't be Talk about this...
- No problem.
I started, it might be finished too.
And that's when I finally realized
something has gone wrong when he...
evacuate his stomach...
or whatever medical terms.
That's when I found
something terrible has happened.
- That's very sad
- I still think it should Take a bed, though.
It might help.
- All right, I hope you all storage space for dessert
[Uncle Nick] - With the sixth inning Everyone is good and drunk.
Many fathers immediately realize
that as soon as the round has passed,
the risk loved ones grow
It's time to go.
They don't want to see what happens next.
Troubleshooters don't go anywhere
They survive,
ready to see this to the end.
[thinking] - I rarely tell this story.
What is Valerie's reaction?
If he comes through that door, he is mine.
Just sit and wait until he does it
[fine music]
N & apos;
He will not say a word.
Nor do I.
And that will be perfect.
- Nick?
Are you okay?
- Yeah.
I'm fine.
- Cody is mentioned once that you have a boyfriend
who died
but I don't know the whole story, obviously.
- Yeah. Now you do
- I'm sorry that happened
The offer is still standing, about the bed,
You know, if you want it.
- Good.
Yes, I think I'm fine.
- We will start White Elephant immediately.
That will be fun.
- Ha.
- Here's how Wilkins family version
White Elephant works.
You start with a stack of prizes.
Simple, inexpensive items. Not expensive If you roll seven or eleven,
You can take one of the prizes from the pile
Shaking is allowed
You go around the room
until every time is from the table
The second round is when all becomes ugly
You set the timer for ten minutes
If you roll seven or eleven,
You can take gifts from other people's piles.
[air blowing horn] air horn add tension to sudden death.
Michelle and I are used to gang up on Cody
and take everything He is in the second round
because, well, kill him
When the timer rings, the game ends
And that's how you play White Elephant.
White Elephant is a terrible game
It's all about jealousy and greed.
Feelings hurt.
You know, that kinda makes it perfect for Christmas - Okay, so, before the game starts, guys,
I want to make a small announcement
Um, inside one of the boxes
is a new iPad!
- Ah, yes!
- Whoa, wait a minute,
we don't buy anything is good
Have you changed the rules for us this year
- I think the whole White Elephant
is that supposed to be? to get a small prize.
- I just...
I think that might be more fun
if there is something that we all want?
- I know I want it
- Looks like we will get...
I feel like maybe we should have done more
- Oh, what's up Let's do it.
- Good?
Good!
And! Dan!
I have a maid wrap the prize
even I don't know which is
- Well, if Cody wraps the prize
then he was disqualified right?
"Oh!
[upbeat drumming] N & apos;
- That means you're maid, dum-dum!
[chuckles]
- I'm fine!
Yes Here! iPad, you are mine
Green one.
- BOOyah!
- Aw, Eight Big!
- A difficult break, bro.
- Big bucks, big money, no Whammy...
- yes! - this is nonsense
- Remind me never to go to a casino with you, huh?
- Suck on that
- Yeah.
[sighs]
& apos; Yes!
I will take - I will take any prize.
One of them
- Oh, I have good feel it.
I don't even have to do it, I know it will...
and suck it up!
[laughs]
Fuck it!
Who is the person?
I run this nonsense
You live here
[air blowing horn]
Do you see how hot it is this dice?
I get a third degree burn here
- No no... Oh my God!
- Yes, that's right Give me a gift, Gifty.
- Fuck it!
- is that really necessary?
- I am a winning robot...
Cannot count...
Awesomeness level...
Circuit failed...
- Be careful now, Nick.
There are still sudden deaths.
- Right
Good luck with that.
- Okay, guys, we are ready for the second round.
- Whoa!
& apos; Yes!
- Whoa!
Thank you.
- lucky bitch
[celebrate]
- All right, Uncle Nick.
- Give me the biggest
[timer dings]
[Uncle Nick] - That's what happened
when I get a glimmer of light hope in my life,
my stupid brother ruins everything
- Thank you sir.
- Fuck, sir.
- All right, you-
iPad, here it is
- Suitable...
- Ah, a set of teas.
- I like this... if you want...
- I suspect this comes from you, Nick
- Yap-
Looks like you are the real winner here, huh?
- See what I get
Yes yes! On your stupid face!
Give me love! Yes!
Give me love!
You will leave me hangin & apos; bro?
- Yap-
- Ah, come on
Michelle, will give me a little love.
Kev, will give me a little love.
You know, Nick, Nobody likes losers who are sick.
- You're right. So take your iPad, Cody.
Take it as you have done all that ever existed
given to you you whole damn life
- I've worked a lot.
& apos; [sneering]
Pouring wine doesn't work.
- Oh, and bossin & apos; around a group of Mexicans, it's work
- Puerto Rican people.
- Whatever. Like you work hard.
- Work takes over family business
- Hey, nobody asks you to take over, Nick
- You're right.
No one asked me to take over.
I have no other choice.
I have to pay for you failed higher education
because Dad died
One more thing:
when will you go to start kicking in
in nursing homes?
I don't think it's fair I have to swipe
to support my own mother
You are married to Cody now
so I think it should share some burden.
- I don't think this way is the right time
to discuss this
- When is it right?
Can we put it on damn calendar
Can you pencil me
& apos; [booing]
- Leave him out of this, Nick.
- Fuck yourself, beautiful boys
- What should we take? This is outside, Nick?
- Look at me. Look at me. Calm down.
- Cody, just tap it. You don't help
- Yeah, well, I won't not be respected at my house
- "My house!" Do you hear that nonsense?
Extraordinary.
- Okay, just tap. Come on, come with me.
Come on.
- Damn, Cody Fuck you and your tannin.
- Yeah, well, fuck you, Nick
- Eat all the penis, buddy. All of them
_ ----.....
[wind blowing]
- this, drink this
- Fuck it
- That's really mature, Nick.
God, I hate that when are you like this
- Yeah, well, I hate Cody.
- Well, Cody doesn't destroy your life
[booing] - Now you take the side?
- No, Jesus, of course not.
It's just...
If you are very unhappy running company landscaping,
why don't you just sell it?
- For whom?
- I don't know Someone.
- And do what?
I'm too old to start over.
And who goes to care for the mother?
- You know I will help you if I can
- I know.
- You have seen my husband
You have heard of the podcast.
- No, not yet.
I don't want to listen to for that damn thing.
- no chance - neither do I.
- Listen, just-- this is Christmas Let's just relax and enjoy ourselves, okay?
Fuck everyone.
- Good.
[Uncle Nick] - I don't believe that I will ask him this.
- Hey, what do you think I have a chance with Valerie?
I mean, you're a girl, You know such nonsense.
- Dude!
Wake up!
Valerie the unlucky child!
- He is twenty,
and he has given me signs all night until the third round -
- Oh, he's twenty.
Dude.
Oh my God, is that your penman ?!
Why? Will you show that ?!
Jesus!
- Whoops
Not this.
- He says he loves sucking cock
- Oh my God, what's wrong wrong with you
Jesus!
- Will you continue this on D-L?
- Dude, you need for drunk fuck up
before you do something stupid that you will regret
Hey!
Jesus slept with Christ
[door slammed shut]
[wind blowing]
- Where do we go?
- I just went to get around
- Um... You don't need another DUI.
[chuckles]
- You're right.
I can't there again
Maybe it's also comfortable, huh?
- [laughs]
[electric chair rotates]
[chuckles]
- Jesus.
- You know I'm still waiting for for an image, right?
- Yes, You don't want to see it.
- How do you expect to get something in return?
- It could be whip here,
save both of us the problem, huh?
- Good.
Do it.
- yes?
Is that what you want?
- Yeah.
Whip it out.
- [chuckles]
Well...
It's cold.
- This is what you want right?
You have thought about this all day, right?
- Thinking about what?
- Make me alone
Having a way with me
You have, right?
- That thought has crossed my mind
- Is this what you want?
What do you want to do to me, Uncle Nick?
- Down.
- What?
- Down. Down.
- Why?
- Valerie, I can't, I can't.
- are you serious?
- [sighs]
I'm sorry. I...
That's wrong We shouldn't do this.
- [sighs]
Well, that's your loss
I'm just drunk enough to really say, "Fuck that."
- I know.
I know.
Fuck.
[strange music]
N & apos;
[U nole Nick] - Local legend John Adams sits on the bench
and hit the base drum as it always does
when the Indians are in need of a demonstration.
They fall and the game slips.
[drum boom]
- Fuck it
[cellphone buzzing]
- Hello?
[laughs] Who found them?
Hello? Nick?
- Everything's messed up, Luis, it's all messed up
- I don't understand What do you mean?
- I just...
When is this to be my time
- Nick, I have to go
It's Christmas, you know?
- I know I said so will take a taxi home
but I really need you to come pick me up
I need to see the face I know.
You don't have it respect me, man
- You are Number One Guy -
- You're drunk
And I'm sick and tired take care of you -
- What are you talking about?
- You are the worst boss I've ever had
I don't care if I have to stand up
in front of Home Depot for the rest of my life.
I'm out! Punta!
[crying] - what is there...?
[Silent Night plays]
N & apos;
- No, it shouldn't.
- Yes we must.
- Okay wait-- No no No.
- I really want your to get your nose...
- I mean,
I don't know how much more I can get it there.
♪ All calm
♪ Bright AH...
- What is "Don't Disturb"?
[sniff]
- Swirl it.
- Oh, so quiet. - It's in Quiet mode.
- So what if we want to make a fuss?
What sound did it make?
[rinsing]
Hey, hey, that's mother's juice
What is this?
- This is Timmy & apos; s TK Adventure
- I never really tasted wine before
- I really never Tasted it before.
And I can't feel it anymore.
- is this right?
- One two three. - Two three.
- [belches]
That was terrible. Do you hear me?
- No.
- [belches]
♪... Holy night
♪ All calm
♪ All light
[snoring] [panting]
- Oh Jesus
You feel very good.
- Am I strict
- Oh, you are very bad.
Oh, Jesus Christ, you feel very good
[keep gasping]
♪ Sleep in heavenly peace
[Uncle Nick] - At the end of the 8th inning,
Things change real bad.
Indians are down two rounds
and only three out away
from ending one of is mostly out of control,