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7
00:00:45,150 --> 00:00:46,742
Come on, come on, come on, 300.
8
00:00:46,752 --> 00:00:48,710
9
00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:50,443
By the way, you look amazing.
10
00:00:50,453 --> 00:00:50,445
& nbsp
11
00:00:50,455 --> 00:00:52,580
You lose weight, right?
12
00:00:52,590 --> 00:00:52,582
& nbsp
13
00:00:52,592 --> 00:00:55,348
Face looks tool.
Take this.
14
00:00:55,358 --> 00:00:55,350
& nbsp
15
00:00:55,360 --> 00:00:57,684
You have good skin.
16
00:00:57,694 --> 00:00:57,686
& nbsp
17
00:00:57,696 --> 00:00:59,820
Tell your mother I said, "Hello", okay?
18
00:00:59,830 --> 00:00:59,822
& nbsp
19
00:00:59,832 --> 00:01:01,856
Call him.
20
00:01:01,866 --> 00:01:01,858
& nbsp
21
00:01:01,868 --> 00:01:03,056
OK?
22
00:01:03,066 --> 00:01:03,058
& nbsp
23
00:01:03,068 --> 00:01:05,528
[playing rock music]
24
00:01:05,538 --> 00:01:22,712
& nbsp
25
00:01:22,722 --> 00:01:24,180
♪
26
00:01:24,190 --> 00:01:56,144
& nbsp
27
00:01:56,154 --> 00:01:57,913
♪
28
00:01:57,923 --> 00:02:24,006
& nbsp
29
00:02:24,016 --> 00:02:25,642
♪
30
00:02:25,652 --> 00:02:51,367
& nbsp
31
00:02:51,377 --> 00:02:53,666
- Dom, let me ask a question.
- What?
32
00:02:53,676 --> 00:02:53,668
& nbsp
33
00:02:53,678 --> 00:02:56,402
What makes you think that a
head shave looks good on you?
34
00:02:56,412 --> 00:02:56,404
& nbsp
35
00:02:56,414 --> 00:02:59,373
I don't know
You know,
A little hairline is a little behind.
36
00:02:59,383 --> 00:02:59,375
& nbsp
37
00:02:59,385 --> 00:03:01,175
I thought I would cheat the scalp.
38
00:03:01,185 --> 00:03:01,177
& nbsp
39
00:03:01,187 --> 00:03:02,543
"Scalp Trick?"
40
00:03:02,553 --> 00:03:02,545
& nbsp
41
00:03:02,555 --> 00:03:04,277
You cheat the earth, bro.
42
00:03:04,287 --> 00:03:04,279
& nbsp
43
00:03:04,289 --> 00:03:05,513
Doesn't look good.
44
00:03:05,523 --> 00:03:05,515
& nbsp
45
00:03:05,525 --> 00:03:06,813
What?
You don't like it
46
00:03:06,823 --> 00:03:06,815
& nbsp
47
00:03:06,825 --> 00:03:08,917
It seems like your mother
messed up marshmallows
48
00:03:08,927 --> 00:03:10,219
& nbsp
49
00:03:10,229 --> 00:03:11,752
I, I don't even understand.
50
00:03:11,762 --> 00:03:11,754
& nbsp
51
00:03:11,764 --> 00:03:14,521
I don't know, you just got a
face that looks better with hair.
52
00:03:14,531 --> 00:03:14,523
& nbsp
53
00:03:14,533 --> 00:03:15,823
I mean, look at my hair.
54
00:03:15,833 --> 00:03:15,825
& nbsp
55
00:03:15,835 --> 00:03:17,758
You never see me shave
my damn head, right?
56
00:03:17,768 --> 00:03:17,760
& nbsp
57
00:03:17,770 --> 00:03:19,627
You don't need to, you grow
hair while I see you
58
00:03:19,637 --> 00:03:19,629
& nbsp
59
00:03:19,639 --> 00:03:21,494
I know, how great is that, huh?
60
00:03:21,504 --> 00:03:21,496
& nbsp
61
00:03:21,506 --> 00:03:23,063
- Look...
- I think check in
62
00:03:23,073 --> 00:03:23,065
& nbsp
63
00:03:23,075 --> 00:03:25,999
is when I go and tell you where I go
64
00:03:26,009 --> 00:03:26,001
& nbsp
65
00:03:26,011 --> 00:03:27,801
How does it not enter?
66
00:03:27,811 --> 00:03:27,803
& nbsp
67
00:03:27,813 --> 00:03:29,035
Hello.
68
00:03:29,045 --> 00:03:29,037
& nbsp
69
00:03:29,047 --> 00:03:30,204
Hell...
70
00:03:30,214 --> 00:03:30,206
& nbsp
71
00:03:30,216 --> 00:03:32,242
Dom, come here.
72
00:03:32,252 --> 00:03:39,248
& nbsp
73
00:03:39,258 --> 00:03:41,047
This is the home address.
74
00:03:41,057 --> 00:03:41,049
& nbsp
75
00:03:41,059 --> 00:03:43,583
Family is out of town, so you are clean.
76
00:03:43,593 --> 00:03:43,585
& nbsp
77
00:03:43,595 --> 00:03:46,052
Hey, did you take it
Lougin LeGucci with you?
78
00:03:46,062 --> 00:03:46,054
& nbsp
79
00:03:46,064 --> 00:03:47,487
- What, Sammy?
- Yeah.
80
00:03:47,497 --> 00:03:47,489
& nbsp
81
00:03:47,499 --> 00:03:49,589
Ah, yes, he's a good person.
82
00:03:49,599 --> 00:03:49,591
& nbsp
83
00:03:49,601 --> 00:03:52,125
Can't stop sharing it
thoughts.
He goes
84
00:03:52,135 --> 00:03:52,127
& nbsp
85
00:03:52,137 --> 00:03:53,561
He thinks I don't know
86
00:03:53,571 --> 00:03:53,563
& nbsp
87
00:03:53,573 --> 00:03:56,195
he flips electronics
cigarettes in all cities
88
00:03:56,205 --> 00:03:56,197
& nbsp
89
00:03:56,207 --> 00:03:58,032
Plus, I don't see a dime from it.
90
00:03:58,042 --> 00:03:58,034
& nbsp
91
00:03:58,044 --> 00:03:59,967
Uh, you know, I don't know anything about it
92
00:03:59,977 --> 00:03:59,969
& nbsp
93
00:03:59,979 --> 00:04:01,335
Okay, listen.
94
00:04:01,345 --> 00:04:01,337
& nbsp
95
00:04:01,347 --> 00:04:03,103
There are more than 200 large houses.
96
00:04:03,113 --> 00:04:03,105
& nbsp
97
00:04:03,115 --> 00:04:06,140
It's behind a fake
fireplace when you enter
98
00:04:06,150 --> 00:04:06,142
& nbsp
99
00:04:06,152 --> 00:04:07,341
The family is on vacation.
100
00:04:07,351 --> 00:04:07,343
& nbsp
101
00:04:07,353 --> 00:04:08,676
This is good.
No problem.
102
00:04:08,686 --> 00:04:08,678
& nbsp
103
00:04:08,688 --> 00:04:09,843
Sammy!
104
00:04:09,853 --> 00:04:09,845
& nbsp
105
00:04:09,855 --> 00:04:11,010
[Sammy] Yo!
106
00:04:11,020 --> 00:04:11,012
& nbsp
107
00:04:11,022 --> 00:04:13,980
I heard you were defeated
in electronic cigarettes
108
00:04:13,990 --> 00:04:13,982
& nbsp
109
00:04:13,992 --> 00:04:15,415
Yes, I heard a few things.
110
00:04:15,425 --> 00:04:15,417
& nbsp
111
00:04:15,427 --> 00:04:17,052
I will tell you if it's worth doing.
112
00:04:17,062 --> 00:04:18,486
& nbsp
113
00:04:18,496 --> 00:04:20,154
Remember...
114
00:04:20,164 --> 00:04:20,156
& nbsp
115
00:04:20,166 --> 00:04:22,022
Smoking kills.
116
00:04:22,032 --> 00:04:22,024
& nbsp
117
00:04:22,034 --> 00:04:23,259
[chuckles]
118
00:04:23,269 --> 00:04:24,760
& nbsp
119
00:04:24,770 --> 00:04:25,995
Yes.
120
00:04:26,005 --> 00:04:29,464
& nbsp
121
00:04:29,474 --> 00:04:31,065
Dom, I ask a question.
122
00:04:31,075 --> 00:04:31,067
& nbsp
123
00:04:31,077 --> 00:04:33,900
Why is your uncle always there?
come out with a dramatic statement?
124
00:04:33,910 --> 00:04:33,902
& nbsp
125
00:04:33,912 --> 00:04:35,068
I don't know
126
00:04:35,078 --> 00:04:35,070
& nbsp
127
00:04:35,080 --> 00:04:36,402
I don't like it.
128
00:04:36,412 --> 00:04:36,404
& nbsp
129
00:04:36,414 --> 00:04:37,871
Playing the role of "Nice Guy".
130
00:04:37,881 --> 00:04:37,873
& nbsp
131
00:04:37,883 --> 00:04:39,806
Then, explode, say some nonsense
You can't feel comfortable with.
132
00:04:39,816 --> 00:04:39,808
& nbsp
133
00:04:39,818 --> 00:04:41,174
Look, I won't worry about it.
134
00:04:41,184 --> 00:04:41,176
& nbsp
135
00:04:41,186 --> 00:04:44,445
But, look, he says this
score, like 200k.
136
00:04:44,455 --> 00:04:44,447
& nbsp
137
00:04:44,457 --> 00:04:46,080
Okay, we need to get this money,
138
00:04:46,090 --> 00:04:46,082
& nbsp
139
00:04:46,092 --> 00:04:47,647
get some new head shots,
140
00:04:47,657 --> 00:04:47,649
& nbsp
141
00:04:47,659 --> 00:04:50,253
my road model to a
damn catalog already
142
00:04:50,263 --> 00:04:51,519
& nbsp
143
00:04:51,529 --> 00:04:53,354
Sal, you are 41 years old & nbsp
144
00:04:53,364 --> 00:04:53,356
Continue?
145
00:04:53,366 --> 00:04:54,654
& nbsp
146
00:04:54,664 --> 00:04:54,656
40 years old is a very large child
demographic marketing
147
00:04:54,666 --> 00:04:57,724
& nbsp
148
00:04:57,734 --> 00:04:57,726
Plus, they buy lots of nonsense.
149
00:04:57,736 --> 00:05:00,294
& nbsp
150
00:05:00,304 --> 00:05:00,296
Not from your face.
151
00:05:00,306 --> 00:05:01,698
& nbsp
152
00:05:01,708 --> 00:05:10,272
Thank you.
153
00:05:10,282 --> 00:05:11,371
& nbsp
154
00:05:11,381 --> 00:05:11,373
So, how is the school?
155
00:05:11,383 --> 00:05:12,705
& nbsp
156
00:05:12,715 --> 00:05:12,707
School is not as bad as I
think it will happen
157
00:05:12,717 --> 00:05:14,474
& nbsp
158
00:05:14,484 --> 00:05:14,476
That's good.
159
00:05:14,486 --> 00:05:16,042
& nbsp
160
00:05:16,052 --> 00:05:16,044
161
00:05:16,054 --> 00:05:18,544
I don't want you sick
this school at the beginning of the game.
162
00:05:18,554 --> 00:05:18,546
& nbsp
163
00:05:18,556 --> 00:05:20,380
That, I can't promise.
164
00:05:20,390 --> 00:05:20,382
& nbsp
165
00:05:20,392 --> 00:05:21,818
Oh my God.
166
00:05:21,828 --> 00:05:23,952
& nbsp
167
00:05:23,962 --> 00:05:25,885
Honey, the time is up.
168
00:05:25,895 --> 00:05:25,887
& nbsp
169
00:05:25,897 --> 00:05:27,221
Uh.
170
00:05:27,231 --> 00:05:27,223
& nbsp
171
00:05:27,233 --> 00:05:28,621
OK, come on
172
00:05:28,631 --> 00:05:28,623
& nbsp
173
00:05:28,633 --> 00:05:30,957
- There has never been enough time, yes, Maddy?
- Yeah.
174
00:05:30,967 --> 00:05:30,959
& nbsp
175
00:05:30,969 --> 00:05:34,460
You know I love you.
I will
See you in a few days, okay?
176
00:05:34,470 --> 00:05:34,462
& nbsp
177
00:05:34,472 --> 00:05:36,198
Hi dear.
178
00:05:36,208 --> 00:05:39,034
& nbsp
179
00:05:39,044 --> 00:05:40,734
I only need one minute with Dad, okay?
180
00:05:40,744 --> 00:05:40,736
& nbsp
181
00:05:40,746 --> 00:05:42,169
- Do you want to sit here?
- Good.
182
00:05:42,179 --> 00:05:42,171
& nbsp
183
00:05:42,181 --> 00:05:44,471
- baby, dad
See you later.
- I love you, Maddy.
184
00:05:44,481 --> 00:05:44,473
& nbsp
185
00:05:44,483 --> 00:05:46,440
This, take the ball.
186
00:05:46,450 --> 00:05:46,442
& nbsp
187
00:05:46,452 --> 00:05:48,142
See you this week, okay, honey?
188
00:05:48,152 --> 00:05:48,144
& nbsp
189
00:05:48,154 --> 00:05:50,277
Good.
190
00:05:50,287 --> 00:05:50,279
& nbsp
191
00:05:50,289 --> 00:05:51,779
Enter my office
192
00:05:51,789 --> 00:05:51,781
& nbsp
193
00:05:51,791 --> 00:05:55,315
An office?
Wow, great idea.
194
00:05:55,325 --> 00:05:55,317
& nbsp
195
00:05:55,327 --> 00:05:56,784
The real office
196
00:05:56,794 --> 00:05:56,786
& nbsp
197
00:05:56,796 --> 00:05:58,888
That means you will have a real job.
198
00:05:58,898 --> 00:06:03,358
& nbsp
199
00:06:03,368 --> 00:06:04,928
[laughs]
200
00:06:04,938 --> 00:06:14,103
& nbsp
201
00:06:14,113 --> 00:06:15,969
Don't go spending everything
on your hair or shoes
202
00:06:15,979 --> 00:06:15,971
& nbsp
203
00:06:15,981 --> 00:06:17,371
or whatever you do with your money
204
00:06:17,381 --> 00:06:17,373
& nbsp
205
00:06:17,383 --> 00:06:20,707
My hair?
My hair is a problem, wow.
206
00:06:20,717 --> 00:06:20,709
& nbsp
207
00:06:20,719 --> 00:06:23,811
Okay, you know, I swear
god, I see you and I think
208
00:06:23,821 --> 00:06:23,813
& nbsp
209
00:06:23,823 --> 00:06:26,914
There are many things
You can be clever.
210
00:06:26,924 --> 00:06:26,916
& nbsp
211
00:06:26,926 --> 00:06:28,748
Maybe stealing is my gift, huh?
212
00:06:28,758 --> 00:06:28,750
& nbsp
213
00:06:28,760 --> 00:06:31,685
That's not funny.
Sammy...
214
00:06:31,695 --> 00:06:31,687
& nbsp
215
00:06:31,697 --> 00:06:33,721
Your daughter needs some time with you.
216
00:06:33,731 --> 00:06:33,723
& nbsp
217
00:06:33,733 --> 00:06:35,923
Like the actual schedule.
218
00:06:35,933 --> 00:06:35,925
& nbsp
219
00:06:35,935 --> 00:06:37,323
I know.
220
00:06:37,333 --> 00:06:37,325
& nbsp
221
00:06:37,335 --> 00:06:39,993
I'm working on a schedule.
222
00:06:40,003 --> 00:06:39,995
& nbsp
223
00:06:40,005 --> 00:06:41,231
Trust me.
224
00:06:41,241 --> 00:06:50,606
& nbsp
225
00:06:50,616 --> 00:06:53,272
It would be like taking
candy from a damn baby
226
00:06:53,282 --> 00:06:53,274
& nbsp
227
00:06:53,284 --> 00:06:54,777
Baby Gorillas
228
00:06:54,787 --> 00:06:57,413
& nbsp
229
00:06:57,423 --> 00:06:59,412
Hey, I guess I know that guy.
230
00:06:59,422 --> 00:06:59,414
& nbsp
231
00:06:59,424 --> 00:07:01,448
From your modeling school?
[laughs]
232
00:07:01,458 --> 00:07:01,450
& nbsp
233
00:07:01,460 --> 00:07:04,717
Damn it in my dream again, I will do it
fucking kill you where you stand
234
00:07:04,727 --> 00:07:04,719
& nbsp
235
00:07:04,729 --> 00:07:07,421
Calm down, Fabio, this is a bad joke.
236
00:07:07,431 --> 00:07:07,423
& nbsp
237
00:07:07,433 --> 00:07:09,022
Dirt.
238
00:07:09,032 --> 00:07:09,024
& nbsp
239
00:07:09,034 --> 00:07:10,827
I don't have to use a drill.
240
00:07:10,837 --> 00:07:12,127
& nbsp
241
00:07:12,137 --> 00:07:14,161
I think we should do it
do drilling weak points here.
242
00:07:14,171 --> 00:07:14,163
& nbsp
243
00:07:14,173 --> 00:07:16,162
Is that what you call
when you bang Lorie?
244
00:07:16,172 --> 00:07:16,164
& nbsp
245
00:07:16,174 --> 00:07:18,698
[laughs]
246
00:07:18,708 --> 00:07:18,700
& nbsp
247
00:07:18,710 --> 00:07:21,335
Everything is not a joke.
248
00:07:21,345 --> 00:07:21,337
& nbsp
249
00:07:21,347 --> 00:07:22,602
Fuck holy
250
00:07:22,612 --> 00:07:22,604
& nbsp
251
00:07:22,614 --> 00:07:25,104
- What?
- holy fuck
252
00:07:25,114 --> 00:07:25,106
& nbsp
253
00:07:25,116 --> 00:07:26,940
Good.
254
00:07:26,950 --> 00:07:26,942
& nbsp
255
00:07:26,952 --> 00:07:28,375
200k, boy
256
00:07:28,385 --> 00:07:28,377
& nbsp
257
00:07:28,387 --> 00:07:30,710
Jackpot motherfucking
258
00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:30,712
& nbsp
259
00:07:30,722 --> 00:07:32,346
Freeze!
Hands where we can see them.
260
00:07:32,356 --> 00:07:32,348
& nbsp
261
00:07:32,358 --> 00:07:34,815
Wrong moves wrong and Sammy
and I will shoot you for fun.
262
00:07:34,825 --> 00:07:34,817
& nbsp
263
00:07:34,827 --> 00:07:36,116
- Fuck this nonsense
- Come on let's go.
264
00:07:36,126 --> 00:07:36,118
& nbsp
265
00:07:36,128 --> 00:07:38,385
Oh my God.
266
00:07:38,395 --> 00:07:38,387
& nbsp
267
00:07:38,397 --> 00:07:40,490
Freeze, you fuck.
268
00:07:40,500 --> 00:07:41,690
& nbsp
269
00:07:41,700 --> 00:07:44,558
Sammy Legucci, why am I not surprised?
270
00:07:44,568 --> 00:07:44,560
& nbsp
271
00:07:44,570 --> 00:07:46,361
Put the gun, Tommy.
272
00:07:46,371 --> 00:07:49,598
& nbsp
273
00:07:49,608 --> 00:07:51,431
I say, bro,
crazy is the best in bed.
274
00:07:51,441 --> 00:07:51,433
& nbsp
275
00:07:51,443 --> 00:07:56,068
Uh, you sleep with a girl who never
meets her real father, nonsense.
276
00:07:56,078 --> 00:07:56,070
& nbsp
277
00:07:56,080 --> 00:07:57,871
Get out of bed,
You lose teeth,
278
00:07:57,881 --> 00:07:57,873
& nbsp
279
00:07:57,883 --> 00:07:59,505
You get black eyes, your feet hurt,
280
00:07:59,515 --> 00:07:59,507
& nbsp
281
00:07:59,517 --> 00:08:02,041
Your ears are throbbing,
You hear a new language.
282
00:08:02,051 --> 00:08:02,043
& nbsp
283
00:08:02,053 --> 00:08:04,912
- This is amazing.
Orphanage
- [booing]
284
00:08:04,922 --> 00:08:04,914
& nbsp
285
00:08:04,924 --> 00:08:07,046
Try it, bro, trust me.
286
00:08:07,056 --> 00:08:07,048
& nbsp
287
00:08:07,058 --> 00:08:08,383
[officer] Legucci!
288
00:08:08,393 --> 00:08:10,486
& nbsp
289
00:08:10,496 --> 00:08:13,887
You have some real problems.
290
00:08:13,897 --> 00:08:13,889
& nbsp
291
00:08:13,899 --> 00:08:16,690
You tell us who is running
things and we cut the deal.
292
00:08:16,700 --> 00:08:16,692
& nbsp
293
00:08:16,702 --> 00:08:19,426
If not, you will get the maximum and you know it.
294
00:08:19,436 --> 00:08:19,428
& nbsp
295
00:08:19,438 --> 00:08:21,130
There is nothing I can do here.
296
00:08:21,140 --> 00:08:22,264
& nbsp
297
00:08:22,274 --> 00:08:23,931
Don't be offended, Tommy.
298
00:08:23,941 --> 00:08:23,933
& nbsp
299
00:08:23,943 --> 00:08:25,399
I mean, you really can use mint.
300
00:08:25,409 --> 00:08:25,401
& nbsp
301
00:08:25,411 --> 00:08:26,500
What you eat, everything
302
00:08:26,510 --> 00:08:26,502
& nbsp
303
00:08:26,512 --> 00:08:28,101
- OK.
- wise donkey
304
00:08:28,111 --> 00:08:28,103
& nbsp
305
00:08:28,113 --> 00:08:31,404
Friends or no friends, you don't leave this room until you talk
306
00:08:31,414 --> 00:08:31,406
& nbsp
307
00:08:31,416 --> 00:08:33,073
Uh, I'm sick of you
308
00:08:33,083 --> 00:08:33,075
& nbsp
309
00:08:33,085 --> 00:08:35,676
I expect greater things
From you in life, Sammy.
310
00:08:35,686 --> 00:08:35,678
& nbsp
311
00:08:35,688 --> 00:08:37,311
- really
- Yeah.
312
00:08:37,321 --> 00:08:37,313
& nbsp
313
00:08:37,323 --> 00:08:40,113
Selected "Most Likely Success",
dated the hottest girl in school.
314
00:08:40,123 --> 00:08:40,115
& nbsp
315
00:08:40,125 --> 00:08:41,982
I don't know, I think you have a choice.
316
00:08:41,992 --> 00:08:41,984
& nbsp
317
00:08:41,994 --> 00:08:44,618
Now you will go for
robbery, book making, extortion,
318
00:08:44,628 --> 00:08:44,620
& nbsp
319
00:08:44,630 --> 00:08:45,985
I'm guessing fixing a horse.
320
00:08:45,995 --> 00:08:45,987
& nbsp
321
00:08:45,997 --> 00:08:47,955
Whoa, whoa, whoa, I have never fixed a horse.
322
00:08:47,965 --> 00:08:47,957
& nbsp
323
00:08:47,967 --> 00:08:50,123
Give me some names, Sammy.
324
00:08:50,133 --> 00:08:50,125
& nbsp
325
00:08:50,135 --> 00:08:52,559
Save yourself, you know who I am
saying?
You know, you have a small child.
326
00:08:52,569 --> 00:08:52,561
& nbsp
327
00:08:52,571 --> 00:08:53,860
He will need you.
328
00:08:53,870 --> 00:08:53,862
& nbsp
329
00:08:53,872 --> 00:08:56,296
Think of the big picture.
You
don't talk like that
330
00:08:56,306 --> 00:08:56,298
& nbsp
331
00:08:56,308 --> 00:08:59,633
You do a little, you come out,
You miss him confirmation,
332
00:08:59,643 --> 00:08:59,635
& nbsp
333
00:08:59,645 --> 00:09:01,567
You go back in, you miss his marriage,
334
00:09:01,577 --> 00:09:01,569
& nbsp
335
00:09:01,579 --> 00:09:03,336
You enter again, you miss the baby.
336
00:09:03,346 --> 00:09:03,338
& nbsp
337
00:09:03,348 --> 00:09:07,109
Before you turn around, you are old
ex-con and you miss a fucking life.
338
00:09:07,119 --> 00:09:08,611
& nbsp
339
00:09:08,621 --> 00:09:10,509
You are a police or psychic, how are you?
340
00:09:10,519 --> 00:09:10,511
& nbsp
341
00:09:10,521 --> 00:09:11,913
I am both.
342
00:09:11,923 --> 00:09:13,249
& nbsp
343
00:09:13,259 --> 00:09:15,349
Sammy.
344
00:09:15,359 --> 00:09:15,351
& nbsp
345
00:09:15,361 --> 00:09:16,450
I have something for you
346
00:09:16,460 --> 00:09:16,452
& nbsp
347
00:09:16,462 --> 00:09:18,618
That's just because I've been
Get to know my whole life.
348
00:09:18,628 --> 00:09:18,620
& nbsp
349
00:09:18,630 --> 00:09:20,753
This is not a sad song recording, right?
350
00:09:20,763 --> 00:09:20,755
& nbsp
351
00:09:20,765 --> 00:09:22,288
Maybe so too.
352
00:09:22,298 --> 00:09:22,290
& nbsp
353
00:09:22,300 --> 00:09:24,157
Even though you didn't invite
I to your 21st birthday party.
354
00:09:24,167 --> 00:09:24,159
& nbsp
355
00:09:24,169 --> 00:09:26,960
Because I always know
you will become a police officer.
356
00:09:26,970 --> 00:09:26,962
& nbsp
357
00:09:26,972 --> 00:09:28,362
[Dom] What's up, Pat?
358
00:09:28,372 --> 00:09:28,364
& nbsp
359
00:09:28,374 --> 00:09:30,663
[Pat] What's wrong?
You
A bearded friend must go.
360
00:09:30,673 --> 00:09:30,665
& nbsp
361
00:09:30,675 --> 00:09:32,132
Yes?
362
00:09:32,142 --> 00:09:32,134
& nbsp
363
00:09:32,144 --> 00:09:34,401
She's fucking loose
cannon and I don't like it.
364
00:09:34,411 --> 00:09:34,403
& nbsp
365
00:09:34,413 --> 00:09:38,338
Never close it, fuck, he
doesn't kick when he should.
366
00:09:38,348 --> 00:09:38,340
& nbsp
367
00:09:38,350 --> 00:09:40,273
Okay, now how are you?
want me to do it?
368
00:09:40,283 --> 00:09:40,275
& nbsp
369
00:09:40,285 --> 00:09:44,076
no
Just go back to your wife
and I will take care of the rest.
370
00:09:44,086 --> 00:09:44,078
& nbsp
371
00:09:44,088 --> 00:09:45,912
You want to pretend
Life is a joke,
372
00:09:45,922 --> 00:09:45,914
& nbsp
373
00:09:45,924 --> 00:09:48,482
then, unfortunately, I
must teach you lessons.
374
00:09:48,492 --> 00:09:48,484
& nbsp
375
00:09:48,494 --> 00:09:50,249
Because that's what I did.
376
00:09:50,259 --> 00:09:50,251
& nbsp
377
00:09:50,261 --> 00:09:53,387
A little beard with a beard haired.
378
00:09:53,397 --> 00:09:53,389
& nbsp
379
00:09:53,399 --> 00:09:55,155
Okay, alright.
380
00:09:55,165 --> 00:09:55,157
& nbsp
381
00:09:55,167 --> 00:09:59,158
I have a plan for this
extra head witch.
382
00:09:59,168 --> 00:09:59,160
& nbsp
383
00:09:59,170 --> 00:10:03,629
Looks like the Middle East
version of Merlyn, the magician.
384
00:10:03,639 --> 00:10:03,631
& nbsp
385
00:10:03,641 --> 00:10:05,100
I understand.
386
00:10:05,110 --> 00:10:06,335
& nbsp
387
00:10:06,345 --> 00:10:07,537
[phone beeps]
388
00:10:07,547 --> 00:10:09,203
& nbsp
389
00:10:09,213 --> 00:10:10,439
Do you know that voice?
390
00:10:10,449 --> 00:10:11,941
& nbsp
391
00:10:11,951 --> 00:10:13,976
Like the back of my hand.
392
00:10:13,986 --> 00:10:17,880
& nbsp
393
00:10:17,890 --> 00:10:21,381
This is a memorandum
Understanding, Sammy.
394
00:10:21,391 --> 00:10:21,383
& nbsp
395
00:10:21,393 --> 00:10:25,652
Keep a low profile until we
bring you back to testify
396
00:10:25,662 --> 00:10:25,654
& nbsp
397
00:10:25,664 --> 00:10:29,355
We will give you a new one
identity, a house somewhere in America,
398
00:10:29,365 --> 00:10:29,357
& nbsp
399
00:10:29,367 --> 00:10:33,560
$ 65,000 per year for salary,
and 24-hour protection.
400
00:10:33,570 --> 00:10:33,562
& nbsp
401
00:10:33,572 --> 00:10:35,228
That is a guarantee.
402
00:10:35,238 --> 00:10:35,230
& nbsp
403
00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:38,632
Guaranteed boring life,
That is what it is.
404
00:10:38,642 --> 00:10:38,634
& nbsp
405
00:10:38,644 --> 00:10:42,868
But just as I hate to say it, then
this, you do the right thing
406
00:10:42,878 --> 00:10:42,870
& nbsp
407
00:10:42,880 --> 00:10:44,574
The girls will stay with me.
408
00:10:44,584 --> 00:10:45,874
& nbsp
409
00:10:45,884 --> 00:10:47,376
Thank you, Frank.
410
00:10:47,386 --> 00:10:50,346
& nbsp
411
00:10:50,356 --> 00:10:53,613
Tell Maddy I will contact
and I love her very much.
412
00:10:53,623 --> 00:10:53,615
& nbsp
413
00:10:53,625 --> 00:10:55,084
Of course, kid.
414
00:10:55,094 --> 00:10:56,885
& nbsp
415
00:10:56,895 --> 00:10:58,051
What if I want to go see him?
416
00:10:58,061 --> 00:10:58,053
& nbsp
417
00:10:58,063 --> 00:10:59,953
That's up to you.
418
00:10:59,963 --> 00:10:59,955
& nbsp
419
00:10:59,965 --> 00:11:04,992
But we only provide protection for so long
because you still follow this guide.
420
00:11:05,002 --> 00:11:04,994
& nbsp
421
00:11:05,004 --> 00:11:07,360
You know Pat will pay a guarantee.
422
00:11:07,370 --> 00:11:07,362
& nbsp
423
00:11:07,372 --> 00:11:08,663
So wait for your back.
424
00:11:08,673 --> 00:11:21,309
& nbsp
425
00:11:21,319 --> 00:11:22,511
Where did you take me?
426
00:11:22,521 --> 00:11:28,884
& nbsp
427
00:11:28,894 --> 00:11:31,454
[Sammy] This is like a live vanilla version.
428
00:11:31,464 --> 00:11:33,021
& nbsp
429
00:11:33,031 --> 00:11:35,022
I don't feel good about this.
430
00:11:35,032 --> 00:11:35,024
& nbsp
431
00:11:35,034 --> 00:11:37,190
Do you think I care how you feel?
432
00:11:37,200 --> 00:11:37,192
& nbsp
433
00:11:37,202 --> 00:11:38,524
Let his nose get out of trouble.
434
00:11:38,534 --> 00:11:38,526
& nbsp
435
00:11:38,536 --> 00:11:41,594
I don't want to do it
Monitor your every move.
436
00:11:41,604 --> 00:11:41,596
& nbsp
437
00:11:41,606 --> 00:11:43,397
Isn't that your job?
438
00:11:43,407 --> 00:11:43,399
& nbsp
439
00:11:43,409 --> 00:11:44,598
Continue?
440
00:11:44,608 --> 00:11:44,600
& nbsp
441
00:11:44,610 --> 00:11:46,202
Think I love my work?
442
00:11:46,212 --> 00:11:52,808
& nbsp
443
00:11:52,818 --> 00:11:54,710
I will only do my time,
444
00:11:54,720 --> 00:11:55,843
& nbsp
445
00:11:55,853 --> 00:11:57,643
save several lives,
446
00:11:57,653 --> 00:11:57,645
& nbsp
447
00:11:57,655 --> 00:11:58,979
make a few extra dollars on the side,
448
00:11:58,989 --> 00:11:58,981
& nbsp
449
00:11:58,991 --> 00:12:00,546
You don't mind, right?
450
00:12:00,556 --> 00:12:00,548
& nbsp
451
00:12:00,558 --> 00:12:03,552
I have grown up
My nails care more.
452
00:12:03,562 --> 00:12:06,054
& nbsp
453
00:12:06,064 --> 00:12:08,056
You're a very sensitive person, huh?
454
00:12:08,066 --> 00:12:09,357
& nbsp
455
00:12:09,367 --> 00:12:12,158
I am here to watch over you and that's it.
456
00:12:12,168 --> 00:12:12,160
& nbsp
457
00:12:12,170 --> 00:12:14,694
I don't like small talk.
458
00:12:14,704 --> 00:12:14,696
& nbsp
459
00:12:14,706 --> 00:12:16,562
I also don't like small talk, okay?
460
00:12:16,572 --> 00:12:16,564
& nbsp
461
00:12:16,574 --> 00:12:19,501
I don't know what else
is sad, your voice or my life
462
00:12:19,511 --> 00:12:20,535
& nbsp
463
00:12:20,545 --> 00:12:22,370
I think I can answer it.
464
00:12:22,380 --> 00:12:24,405
& nbsp
465
00:12:24,415 --> 00:12:27,507
[Marshall] This is Sheriff Colin's wood.
466
00:12:27,517 --> 00:12:27,509
& nbsp
467
00:12:27,519 --> 00:12:29,276
Wowie, look here
468
00:12:29,286 --> 00:12:29,278
& nbsp
469
00:12:29,288 --> 00:12:34,413
We have a real life
mafioso from a big city
470
00:12:34,423 --> 00:12:34,415
& nbsp
471
00:12:34,425 --> 00:12:36,649
There is no such thing as
mafia, okay
Be relaxed.
472
00:12:36,659 --> 00:12:36,651
& nbsp
473
00:12:36,661 --> 00:12:38,417
Yes, I'm sure there isn't.
474
00:12:38,427 --> 00:12:38,419
& nbsp
475
00:12:38,429 --> 00:12:41,153
But just remember, we have a family here.
476
00:12:41,163 --> 00:12:41,155
& nbsp
477
00:12:41,165 --> 00:12:44,391
Large family with big weapons.
478
00:12:44,401 --> 00:12:44,393
& nbsp
479
00:12:44,403 --> 00:12:46,292
So I'm sure we will be fine.
480
00:12:46,302 --> 00:12:46,294
& nbsp
481
00:12:46,304 --> 00:12:49,128
Chief, he is under our protection.
482
00:12:49,138 --> 00:12:49,130
& nbsp
483
00:12:49,140 --> 00:12:51,230
Let's try to get it
off on the right foot
484
00:12:51,240 --> 00:12:51,232
& nbsp
485
00:12:51,242 --> 00:12:52,932
Okay dokey.
486
00:12:52,942 --> 00:12:52,934
& nbsp
487
00:12:52,944 --> 00:12:55,001
Maybe one day we can
meet and drink beer,
488
00:12:55,011 --> 00:12:55,003
& nbsp
489
00:12:55,013 --> 00:12:56,103
share some stories
490
00:12:56,113 --> 00:12:56,105
& nbsp
491
00:12:56,115 --> 00:12:58,104
I'm sure you have some good stories?
492
00:12:58,114 --> 00:12:58,106
& nbsp
493
00:12:58,116 --> 00:13:00,607
Your bet will throw us
for real imagination, huh?
494
00:13:00,617 --> 00:13:00,609
& nbsp
495
00:13:00,619 --> 00:13:01,740
What is weird?
496
00:13:01,750 --> 00:13:01,742
& nbsp
497
00:13:01,752 --> 00:13:03,343
What's strange, Mr. Hirsh.
498
00:13:03,353 --> 00:13:03,345
& nbsp
499
00:13:03,355 --> 00:13:04,643
Hesh.
500
00:13:04,653 --> 00:13:04,645
& nbsp
501
00:13:04,655 --> 00:13:07,613
His new name is Derek Hesh.
502
00:13:07,623 --> 00:13:07,615
& nbsp
503
00:13:07,625 --> 00:13:08,915
I certainly didn't choose it.
504
00:13:08,925 --> 00:13:08,917
& nbsp
505
00:13:08,927 --> 00:13:10,484
I'm sure you're not
506
00:13:10,494 --> 00:13:10,486
& nbsp
507
00:13:10,496 --> 00:13:11,484
Hmm?
508
00:13:11,494 --> 00:13:11,486
& nbsp
509
00:13:11,496 --> 00:13:13,552
Bet you want to choose
something like Travolta
510
00:13:13,562 --> 00:13:13,554
& nbsp
511
00:13:13,564 --> 00:13:14,789
Hmm?
512
00:13:14,799 --> 00:13:24,365
& nbsp
513
00:13:24,375 --> 00:13:26,134
[dogs barking]
514
00:13:26,144 --> 00:13:39,715
& nbsp
515
00:13:39,725 --> 00:13:41,183
[doorbell]
516
00:13:41,193 --> 00:13:48,890
& nbsp
517
00:13:48,900 --> 00:13:50,459
[doorbell]
518
00:13:50,469 --> 00:13:54,096
& nbsp
519
00:13:54,106 --> 00:13:56,562
Hi, you must be Derek.
520
00:13:56,572 --> 00:13:56,564
& nbsp
521
00:13:56,574 --> 00:14:01,501
I am Tricia, Colin and Rex's wife
and we are very happy to have you here
522
00:14:01,511 --> 00:14:01,503
& nbsp
523
00:14:01,513 --> 00:14:03,302
I hope you don't mind us
appear without notice.
524
00:14:03,312 --> 00:14:03,304
& nbsp
525
00:14:03,314 --> 00:14:05,571
I just want to tell you
we arrived at the block.
526
00:14:05,581 --> 00:14:05,573
& nbsp
527
00:14:05,583 --> 00:14:08,675
If you need something,
don't hesitate to ask
528
00:14:08,685 --> 00:14:08,677
& nbsp
529
00:14:08,687 --> 00:14:11,411
Isn't this area just big?
530
00:14:11,421 --> 00:14:11,413
& nbsp
531
00:14:11,423 --> 00:14:12,711
Is that dirt?
532
00:14:12,721 --> 00:14:12,713
& nbsp
533
00:14:12,723 --> 00:14:13,913
or brown on his face?
534
00:14:13,923 --> 00:14:13,915
& nbsp
535
00:14:13,925 --> 00:14:15,849
Oh, that's both.
[chuckles]
536
00:14:15,859 --> 00:14:15,851
& nbsp
537
00:14:15,861 --> 00:14:18,317
Boys enter everything.
538
00:14:18,327 --> 00:14:18,319
& nbsp
539
00:14:18,329 --> 00:14:20,152
What exactly are you doing?
husband tells me about me
540
00:14:20,162 --> 00:14:20,154
& nbsp
541
00:14:20,164 --> 00:14:22,088
Oh, he said you were from New York
542
00:14:22,098 --> 00:14:22,090
& nbsp
543
00:14:22,100 --> 00:14:25,358
and that you are only a
spitfire personality
544
00:14:25,368 --> 00:14:25,360
& nbsp
545
00:14:25,370 --> 00:14:29,262
and that you will be great
here with us small town people.
546
00:14:29,272 --> 00:14:29,264
& nbsp
547
00:14:29,274 --> 00:14:31,931
He says you work
construction or something so I just,
548
00:14:31,941 --> 00:14:31,933
& nbsp
549
00:14:31,943 --> 00:14:33,099
I brought you pie.
550
00:14:33,109 --> 00:14:33,101
& nbsp
551
00:14:33,111 --> 00:14:34,234
Enjoy, it's an apple.
552
00:14:34,244 --> 00:14:34,236
& nbsp
553
00:14:34,246 --> 00:14:35,671
- Thank you.
- Mm-mmm.
554
00:14:35,681 --> 00:14:36,804
& nbsp
555
00:14:36,814 --> 00:14:39,306
- Are you a smoker?
- Yes, why?
556
00:14:39,316 --> 00:14:39,308
& nbsp
557
00:14:39,318 --> 00:14:40,542
Hold.
558
00:14:40,552 --> 00:14:43,946
& nbsp
559
00:14:43,956 --> 00:14:45,211
Try this.
560
00:14:45,221 --> 00:14:45,213
& nbsp
561
00:14:45,223 --> 00:14:46,445
You will thank me
562
00:14:46,455 --> 00:14:46,447
& nbsp
563
00:14:46,457 --> 00:14:48,147
And your little one will also thank me.
564
00:14:48,157 --> 00:14:48,149
& nbsp
565
00:14:48,159 --> 00:14:49,516
You will have lots of
of energy after this,
566
00:14:49,526 --> 00:14:49,518
& nbsp
567
00:14:49,528 --> 00:14:51,551
You will clean his face all day.
568
00:14:51,561 --> 00:14:51,553
& nbsp
569
00:14:51,563 --> 00:14:54,153
Sen, I want to try it.
570
00:14:54,163 --> 00:14:54,155
& nbsp
571
00:14:54,165 --> 00:14:55,888
That looks fun to me.
572
00:14:55,898 --> 00:14:55,890
& nbsp
573
00:14:55,900 --> 00:14:57,724
Make it a reality.
574
00:14:57,734 --> 00:14:57,726
& nbsp
575
00:14:57,736 --> 00:14:59,960
Stop, Rex.
576
00:14:59,970 --> 00:14:59,962
& nbsp
577
00:14:59,972 --> 00:15:02,195
[on the phone] Daddy wants
to find out if you got a call.
578
00:15:02,207 --> 00:15:05,065
"Of course I go call it
I talk to you about it.
579
00:15:05,075 --> 00:15:05,067
& nbsp
580
00:15:05,077 --> 00:15:06,666
Tell him I say," Thank you ".
581
00:15:06,676 --> 00:15:06,668
& nbsp
582
00:15:06,678 --> 00:15:08,868
Where is my daughter?
I want to talk to him.
583
00:15:08,878 --> 00:15:08,870
& nbsp
584
00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:10,503
He is not here now.
585
00:15:10,513 --> 00:15:10,505
& nbsp
586
00:15:11,781 --> 00:15:11,773
& nbsp
587
00:15:11,783 --> 00:15:13,373
I don't know.
588
00:15:13,383 --> 00:15:13,375
& nbsp
589
00:15:13,385 --> 00:15:14,840
Give me time to call him.
590
00:15:14,850 --> 00:15:14,842
& nbsp
591
00:15:14,852 --> 00:15:18,277
Try again in a few days and
I am sure you will catch it.
592
00:15:19,689 --> 00:15:19,681
& nbsp
593
00:15:20,893 --> 00:15:27,722
& nbsp
594
00:15:27,732 --> 00:15:29,791
[playing guitar songs]
595
00:15:29,801 --> 00:15:53,447
& nbsp
596
00:15:51,045 --> 00:15:56,248
[Mel] ♪ Another drink
And I don't think ♪
597
00:15:59,698 --> 00:16:02,555
♪ One more shot
That's all I got ♪
598
00:16:02,565 --> 00:16:02,557
& nbsp
599
00:16:02,567 --> 00:16:05,591
♪ If I keep my name
in his favorite car ♪
600
00:16:05,601 --> 00:16:05,593
& nbsp
601
00:16:05,603 --> 00:16:09,628
♪ He is the only
my whole world girl ♪
602
00:16:09,638 --> 00:16:09,630
& nbsp
603
00:16:09,640 --> 00:16:15,301
♪ Who would have thought that
would end like this ♪
604
00:16:15,311 --> 00:16:15,303
& nbsp
605
00:16:15,313 --> 00:16:18,138
♪ Never see myself
As a stalker ♪
606
00:16:18,148 --> 00:16:18,140
& nbsp
607
00:16:18,150 --> 00:16:21,407
♪ But he left me tall and dry ♪
608
00:16:21,417 --> 00:16:21,409
& nbsp
609
00:16:21,419 --> 00:16:24,477
♪ So he must know
When he decides to go ♪
610
00:16:24,487 --> 00:16:24,479
& nbsp
611
00:16:24,489 --> 00:16:28,214
♪ I will do it
follow right behind ♪
612
00:16:28,224 --> 00:16:28,216
& nbsp
613
00:16:28,226 --> 00:16:30,016
♪ Never see myself
As a stalker... ♪
614
00:16:30,026 --> 00:16:30,018
& nbsp
615
00:16:30,028 --> 00:16:32,054
Hey, how can I help you?
616
00:16:32,064 --> 00:16:35,289
& nbsp
617
00:16:35,299 --> 00:16:38,825
My God is doing your face
looking out of place here
618
00:16:38,835 --> 00:16:38,827
& nbsp
619
00:16:38,837 --> 00:16:40,759
Get out of here.
620
00:16:40,769 --> 00:16:40,761
& nbsp
621
00:16:40,771 --> 00:16:44,931
It's just that you are really hot and
Your face doesn't go with this building.
622
00:16:44,941 --> 00:16:44,933
& nbsp
623
00:16:44,943 --> 00:16:49,268
Oh, your mouth must be dry from here
all the hot air comes out of it.
624
00:16:49,278 --> 00:16:49,270
& nbsp
625
00:16:49,280 --> 00:16:51,503
Are you drinking?
626
00:16:51,513 --> 00:16:51,505
& nbsp
627
00:16:51,515 --> 00:16:53,776
Yeah, I'll drink
whiskey and some beliefs.
628
00:16:53,786 --> 00:16:57,578
& nbsp
629
00:16:57,588 --> 00:17:00,046
- Eh, I asked a question.
- Hmm.
630
00:17:00,056 --> 00:17:00,048
& nbsp
631
00:17:00,058 --> 00:17:02,852
Are these hot spots in the city?
This is it?
632
00:17:02,862 --> 00:17:04,486
& nbsp
633
00:17:04,496 --> 00:17:06,519
Let me see.
634
00:17:06,529 --> 00:17:06,521
& nbsp
635
00:17:06,531 --> 00:17:10,522
We have a broken heart
redneck on stage named Mel,
636
00:17:10,532 --> 00:17:10,524
& nbsp
637
00:17:10,534 --> 00:17:13,426
Singing about love he
may never have been.
638
00:17:13,436 --> 00:17:13,428
& nbsp
639
00:17:13,438 --> 00:17:17,933
So if you call it hot
spot, then this is a hot spot.
640
00:17:17,943 --> 00:17:19,900
& nbsp
641
00:17:19,910 --> 00:17:21,000
I think I have a crush.
642
00:17:21,012 --> 00:17:22,769
Oh, don't expect no.
643
00:17:22,779 --> 00:17:22,771
& nbsp
644
00:17:22,781 --> 00:17:24,204
What is your name?
645
00:17:24,214 --> 00:17:24,206
& nbsp
646
00:17:24,216 --> 00:17:26,908
Hey, Manny.
This is my brother.
647
00:17:26,918 --> 00:17:28,275
& nbsp
648
00:17:28,285 --> 00:17:29,844
- Your brother?
- Mm-hmm.
649
00:17:29,854 --> 00:17:31,278
& nbsp
650
00:17:31,288 --> 00:17:32,712
Nice to meet you.
651
00:17:32,722 --> 00:17:32,714
& nbsp
652
00:17:32,724 --> 00:17:33,916
What is that?
653
00:17:33,926 --> 00:17:36,650
& nbsp
654
00:17:36,660 --> 00:17:39,519
What happens in your house to grow up?
655
00:17:39,529 --> 00:17:39,521
& nbsp
656
00:17:39,531 --> 00:17:41,824
A lot of awkward family talk.
657
00:17:41,834 --> 00:17:43,725
& nbsp
658
00:17:43,735 --> 00:17:49,228
♪ Well, he stole my property
the heart of my car, my soul ♪
659
00:17:49,238 --> 00:17:49,230
& nbsp
660
00:17:49,240 --> 00:17:53,566
♪ He stole my spirit
And he hurt me so... ♪
661
00:17:53,576 --> 00:17:53,568
& nbsp
662
00:17:53,578 --> 00:17:56,301
So we open the trunk, it's like 3,000 baby beanies.
663
00:17:56,311 --> 00:17:56,303
& nbsp
664
00:17:56,313 --> 00:17:58,772
Chinese, black, Puerto Rico.
665
00:17:58,782 --> 00:17:58,774
& nbsp
666
00:17:58,784 --> 00:18:00,540
We think we hijack cigarettes,
667
00:18:00,550 --> 00:18:00,542
& nbsp
668
00:18:00,552 --> 00:18:02,408
we finally hijacked
a dream of ten years
669
00:18:02,418 --> 00:18:02,410
& nbsp
670
00:18:02,420 --> 00:18:04,811
- [chuckles]
- Ha!
671
00:18:04,821 --> 00:18:04,813
& nbsp
672
00:18:04,823 --> 00:18:07,513
Many, come on.
673
00:18:07,523 --> 00:18:07,515
& nbsp
674
00:18:07,525 --> 00:18:11,083
When men meet women
something happens inside,
675
00:18:11,093 --> 00:18:11,085
& nbsp
676
00:18:11,095 --> 00:18:12,886
deep inside.
677
00:18:12,896 --> 00:18:12,888
& nbsp
678
00:18:12,898 --> 00:18:16,022
The first tendency
is to read a diatribe,
679
00:18:16,032 --> 00:18:16,024
& nbsp
680
00:18:16,034 --> 00:18:20,493
because he is related to his rebellion
history as a child thief,
681
00:18:20,503 --> 00:18:20,495
& nbsp
682
00:18:20,505 --> 00:18:23,663
thus looks tense,
683
00:18:23,673 --> 00:18:23,665
& nbsp
684
00:18:23,675 --> 00:18:25,031
cool,
685
00:18:25,041 --> 00:18:25,033
& nbsp
686
00:18:25,043 --> 00:18:26,899
difficult.
687
00:18:26,909 --> 00:18:26,901
& nbsp
688
00:18:26,911 --> 00:18:31,172
While just trying
get access to the palace of women
689
00:18:31,182 --> 00:18:32,674
& nbsp
690
00:18:32,684 --> 00:18:33,939
What?
691
00:18:33,949 --> 00:18:33,941
& nbsp
692
00:18:33,951 --> 00:18:36,576
[Mel continues to sing]
693
00:18:36,586 --> 00:18:36,578
& nbsp
694
00:18:36,588 --> 00:18:38,043
I didn't say anything.
695
00:18:38,053 --> 00:18:38,045
& nbsp
696
00:18:38,055 --> 00:18:42,014
♪ He stole my spirit
And he hurt me so ♪
697
00:18:42,024 --> 00:18:42,016
& nbsp
698
00:18:42,026 --> 00:18:47,089
♪ I tried, I tried
I cried, I cried ♪
699
00:18:47,099 --> 00:18:48,457
& nbsp
700
00:18:48,467 --> 00:18:52,591
♪ And they found it
My body is lying, I'm lying ♪
701
00:18:52,601 --> 00:18:52,593
& nbsp
702
00:18:55,370 --> 00:18:55,362
& nbsp
703
00:18:55,372 --> 00:18:57,362
♪ Must do it ♪
704
00:18:57,372 --> 00:18:57,364
& nbsp
705
00:18:57,374 --> 00:19:02,135
I mean, he claimed to kill
The worst sound I've ever heard in my life.
706
00:19:02,145 --> 00:19:02,137
& nbsp
707
00:19:02,147 --> 00:19:03,302
Why don't you get there?
708
00:19:03,312 --> 00:19:03,304
& nbsp
709
00:19:03,314 --> 00:19:04,637
No no No.
710
00:19:04,647 --> 00:19:04,639
& nbsp
711
00:19:04,649 --> 00:19:06,205
I'm not showing off in front of strangers.
712
00:19:06,215 --> 00:19:06,207
& nbsp
713
00:19:06,217 --> 00:19:08,774
[booing] Why stop now?
714
00:19:08,784 --> 00:19:08,776
& nbsp
715
00:19:08,786 --> 00:19:13,612
Show off
cover insecurity as courage.
716
00:19:13,622 --> 00:19:13,614
& nbsp
717
00:19:13,624 --> 00:19:16,983
I have 100 dollars
which says that you will not do it.
718
00:19:16,993 --> 00:19:16,985
& nbsp
719
00:19:16,995 --> 00:19:18,318
I will put 50 on top of that.
720
00:19:18,328 --> 00:19:18,320
& nbsp
721
00:19:18,330 --> 00:19:20,552
150 dollars just to go up there?
722
00:19:20,562 --> 00:19:20,554
& nbsp
723
00:19:20,564 --> 00:19:21,756
Uh huh.
724
00:19:21,766 --> 00:19:23,257
& nbsp
725
00:19:23,267 --> 00:19:24,792
Who brought me?
726
00:19:24,802 --> 00:19:26,194
& nbsp
727
00:19:26,204 --> 00:19:27,926
Hey, Mel.
728
00:19:27,936 --> 00:19:27,928
& nbsp
729
00:19:27,938 --> 00:19:31,397
Time to slip your sensitive
the heart back in your pants
730
00:19:31,407 --> 00:19:31,399
& nbsp
731
00:19:31,409 --> 00:19:33,666
Bring this person,
what's your name again
732
00:19:33,676 --> 00:19:33,668
& nbsp
733
00:19:33,678 --> 00:19:35,033
Derek.
734
00:19:35,043 --> 00:19:35,035
& nbsp
735
00:19:35,045 --> 00:19:36,168
Little DD
736
00:19:36,178 --> 00:19:36,170
& nbsp
737
00:19:36,180 --> 00:19:38,036
This is Derek.
738
00:19:38,046 --> 00:19:38,038
& nbsp
739
00:19:38,048 --> 00:19:39,339
Little Deacon.
740
00:19:39,349 --> 00:19:39,341
& nbsp
741
00:19:39,351 --> 00:19:42,442
OK.
Yes, please
welcome to the little deacon
742
00:19:42,452 --> 00:19:42,444
& nbsp
743
00:19:42,454 --> 00:19:46,212
- This is Derek
- Welcome to Little Derek
744
00:19:46,222 --> 00:19:46,214
& nbsp
745
00:19:46,224 --> 00:19:48,214
And if anyone knows where JD,
746
00:19:48,224 --> 00:19:48,216
& nbsp
747
00:19:48,226 --> 00:19:51,184
please come to see me after the show
748
00:19:51,194 --> 00:19:51,186
& nbsp
749
00:19:51,196 --> 00:19:53,386
- 150 dollars?
- Mm-hmm.
750
00:19:53,396 --> 00:19:53,388
& nbsp
751
00:19:53,398 --> 00:19:54,923
Put your money
752
00:19:54,933 --> 00:20:01,263
& nbsp
753
00:20:01,273 --> 00:20:02,665
[clears throat]
754
00:20:02,675 --> 00:20:04,866
& nbsp
755
00:20:04,876 --> 00:20:08,003
Mel almost heartbreak
and my love for music.
756
00:20:08,013 --> 00:20:09,236
& nbsp
757
00:20:09,246 --> 00:20:12,107
That is the opposite of uplifting, right?
758
00:20:12,117 --> 00:20:15,176
& nbsp
759
00:20:15,186 --> 00:20:18,243
I mean, that person can't hit
a note if he blows Marvin Gaye.
760
00:20:18,253 --> 00:20:18,245
& nbsp
761
00:20:18,255 --> 00:20:19,647
[low chuckles]
762
00:20:19,657 --> 00:20:21,815
& nbsp
763
00:20:21,825 --> 00:20:23,215
Wow, you two.
764
00:20:23,225 --> 00:20:23,217
& nbsp
765
00:20:23,227 --> 00:20:25,087
What is your dress, goat?
766
00:20:25,097 --> 00:20:27,755
& nbsp
767
00:20:27,765 --> 00:20:30,291
When was the last time
you were shaved?
Have you never?
768
00:20:30,301 --> 00:20:32,026
& nbsp
769
00:20:32,036 --> 00:20:34,394
Have you never heard of gel?
770
00:20:34,404 --> 00:20:34,396
& nbsp
771
00:20:34,406 --> 00:20:35,964
No?
Hair products?
772
00:20:35,974 --> 00:20:37,032
& nbsp
773
00:20:37,042 --> 00:20:39,866
Are you eating jawbreaker?
or is the ball in your mouth?
774
00:20:39,876 --> 00:20:39,868
& nbsp
775
00:20:39,878 --> 00:20:41,935
[laughter]
776
00:20:41,945 --> 00:20:41,937
& nbsp
777
00:20:41,947 --> 00:20:44,807
Your parents, must be chaotic in the forest.
778
00:20:44,817 --> 00:20:46,006
& nbsp
779
00:20:46,016 --> 00:20:47,709
No doubt about it.
780
00:20:47,719 --> 00:20:49,110
& nbsp
781
00:20:49,120 --> 00:20:50,176
Look at you.
782
00:20:50,186 --> 00:20:50,178
& nbsp
783
00:20:50,188 --> 00:20:52,715
Deer and human products.
784
00:20:52,725 --> 00:20:53,782
& nbsp
785
00:20:53,792 --> 00:20:55,651
Two friends share one tooth.
786
00:20:55,661 --> 00:20:58,986
& nbsp
787
00:20:58,996 --> 00:21:00,587
I killed him here.
788
00:21:00,597 --> 00:21:00,589
& nbsp
789
00:21:00,599 --> 00:21:02,825
This is good, I can do it all day.
790
00:21:02,835 --> 00:21:05,427
& nbsp
791
00:21:05,437 --> 00:21:09,596
So when Lorie wrote, "I still like you",
792
00:21:09,606 --> 00:21:09,598
& nbsp
793
00:21:09,608 --> 00:21:12,262
he really means, "i love you".
794
00:21:12,272 --> 00:21:12,264
& nbsp
795
00:21:12,274 --> 00:21:13,265
He just doesn't write "love", right?
796
00:21:13,275 --> 00:21:13,267
& nbsp
797
00:21:13,277 --> 00:21:14,801
I don't know, bro.
798
00:21:14,811 --> 00:21:14,803
& nbsp
799
00:21:14,813 --> 00:21:17,369
I'm pretty sure he knows
The difference between love and love.
800
00:21:17,379 --> 00:21:17,371
& nbsp
801
00:21:17,381 --> 00:21:19,071
No no no no.
802
00:21:19,081 --> 00:21:19,073
& nbsp
803
00:21:19,083 --> 00:21:21,474
This must be some kind of
automatic function damage or whatever
804
00:21:21,484 --> 00:21:21,476
& nbsp
805
00:21:21,486 --> 00:21:23,141
Yes, you know, you
can tell yourself that
806
00:21:23,151 --> 00:21:23,143
& nbsp
807
00:21:23,153 --> 00:21:26,111
But that technology,
is quite rock solid
808
00:21:26,121 --> 00:21:26,113
& nbsp
809
00:21:26,123 --> 00:21:27,245
So is our love, bro.
810
00:21:27,255 --> 00:21:27,247
& nbsp
811
00:21:27,257 --> 00:21:29,648
- [cellphone beeps]
- Oh, wait a moment
812
00:21:29,658 --> 00:21:29,650
& nbsp
813
00:21:29,660 --> 00:21:32,551
He just sent a video.
Let's see what he says
814
00:21:32,561 --> 00:21:32,553
& nbsp
815
00:21:32,563 --> 00:21:34,387
This may be an apology.
816
00:21:34,397 --> 00:21:34,389
& nbsp
817
00:21:34,399 --> 00:21:36,289
We don't send our apologies.
818
00:21:36,299 --> 00:21:36,291
& nbsp
819
00:21:36,301 --> 00:21:40,926
Hey, Sal, I just jerked your cousin
for the third time, isn't that weird?
820
00:21:40,936 --> 00:21:40,928
& nbsp
821
00:21:40,938 --> 00:21:44,797
I have a problem and I
Must listen to this nonsense?
822
00:21:44,807 --> 00:21:44,799
& nbsp
823
00:21:44,809 --> 00:21:46,198
Sammy Legucci.
824
00:21:46,208 --> 00:21:46,200
& nbsp
825
00:21:46,210 --> 00:21:47,769
We have to find it.
826
00:21:47,779 --> 00:21:51,406
& nbsp
827
00:21:51,416 --> 00:21:53,005
Hmm.
828
00:21:53,015 --> 00:21:53,007
& nbsp
829
00:21:53,017 --> 00:21:54,243
25.
830
00:21:54,253 --> 00:21:55,909
& nbsp
831
00:21:55,919 --> 00:21:57,609
Want one?
832
00:21:57,619 --> 00:21:57,611
& nbsp
833
00:21:57,621 --> 00:21:58,914
25.
834
00:21:58,924 --> 00:22:00,114
& nbsp
835
00:22:00,124 --> 00:22:02,247
[crowd laughs]
836
00:22:02,257 --> 00:22:02,249
& nbsp
837
00:22:02,259 --> 00:22:04,650
Okay, until next to the stage,
838
00:22:04,660 --> 00:22:04,652
& nbsp
839
00:22:04,662 --> 00:22:07,020
if not for selling
fishing videos,
840
00:22:07,030 --> 00:22:07,022
& nbsp
841
00:22:07,032 --> 00:22:10,289
Our actions will then fall asleep
in whiskey barrels.
842
00:22:10,299 --> 00:22:10,291
& nbsp
843
00:22:10,301 --> 00:22:14,260
This is to sing about drinking
the problem and the tendency to stalk,
844
00:22:14,270 --> 00:22:14,262
& nbsp
845
00:22:14,272 --> 00:22:17,232
give it to your likes, Mel.
846
00:22:17,242 --> 00:22:20,200
& nbsp
847
00:22:20,210 --> 00:22:22,268
Yo, you move slower,
You will retreat.
848
00:22:22,278 --> 00:22:22,270
& nbsp
849
00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:24,070
Come on, buddy.
850
00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:24,072
& nbsp
851
00:22:24,082 --> 00:22:25,439
Thank you, Derek.
852
00:22:25,449 --> 00:22:28,176
& nbsp
853
00:22:28,186 --> 00:22:30,576
Well, I want to do it right away,
854
00:22:30,586 --> 00:22:30,578
& nbsp
855
00:22:30,588 --> 00:22:33,346
I don't like small talk,
856
00:22:33,356 --> 00:22:33,348
& nbsp
857
00:22:33,358 --> 00:22:35,647
or babbling or just making things.
858
00:22:35,657 --> 00:22:35,649
& nbsp
859
00:22:35,659 --> 00:22:39,284
That will waste your time and my time.
860
00:22:39,294 --> 00:22:39,286
& nbsp
861
00:22:39,296 --> 00:22:41,186
The song I want to do is called,
862
00:22:41,196 --> 00:22:41,188
& nbsp
863
00:22:41,198 --> 00:22:45,260
"It's Not Another
Heavy Breathing at the End, Leslie."
864
00:22:45,270 --> 00:22:46,761
& nbsp
865
00:22:46,771 --> 00:22:49,829
You know, I heard, Mel,
She's out there dating again.
866
00:22:49,839 --> 00:22:49,831
& nbsp
867
00:22:49,841 --> 00:22:51,531
And I think you really did it
something special for him
868
00:22:51,541 --> 00:22:51,533
& nbsp
869
00:22:51,543 --> 00:22:54,837
I think even the lyrics, indeed
even make a positive turn.
870
00:22:54,847 --> 00:22:56,004
& nbsp
871
00:22:56,014 --> 00:22:58,471
Yes, some people
can't get rid of broken hearts
872
00:22:58,483 --> 00:23:00,839
Mm, not me.
873
00:23:00,849 --> 00:23:00,841
& nbsp
874
00:23:00,851 --> 00:23:03,345
I shake my body like dust from the patio mat.
875
00:23:03,355 --> 00:23:04,845
& nbsp
876
00:23:04,855 --> 00:23:07,148
I can't see a man destroying your heart.
877
00:23:07,158 --> 00:23:08,248
& nbsp
878
00:23:08,258 --> 00:23:11,617
Well, it's not really mine
heart, more like my nose
879
00:23:11,627 --> 00:23:11,619
& nbsp
880
00:23:11,629 --> 00:23:13,753
- really
- Hmm.
881
00:23:13,763 --> 00:23:13,755
& nbsp
882
00:23:13,765 --> 00:23:15,088
See if the person wants to go back
883
00:23:15,098 --> 00:23:15,090
& nbsp
884
00:23:15,100 --> 00:23:18,523
ancient lessons in relationships.
885
00:23:18,533 --> 00:23:18,525
& nbsp
886
00:23:18,535 --> 00:23:20,795
I left a part of my past first.
887
00:23:20,805 --> 00:23:22,464
& nbsp
888
00:23:22,474 --> 00:23:24,230
Yes, I also left me.
889
00:23:24,240 --> 00:23:24,232
& nbsp
890
00:23:24,242 --> 00:23:29,037
♪... Bad and dirty whore ♪
891
00:23:29,047 --> 00:23:30,405
& nbsp
892
00:23:30,415 --> 00:23:33,371
So, he sent you the money.
893
00:23:33,381 --> 00:23:33,373
& nbsp
894
00:23:33,383 --> 00:23:34,775
Little by little.
895
00:23:34,785 --> 00:23:36,111
& nbsp
896
00:23:36,121 --> 00:23:38,110
But, yes.
897
00:23:38,120 --> 00:23:38,112
& nbsp
898
00:23:38,122 --> 00:23:40,012
Oh, I can't believe they broke up.
899
00:23:40,022 --> 00:23:40,014
& nbsp
900
00:23:40,024 --> 00:23:41,246
For you and Madison?
901
00:23:41,256 --> 00:23:41,248
& nbsp
902
00:23:41,258 --> 00:23:43,215
Yes, Dad, what?
903
00:23:43,225 --> 00:23:43,217
& nbsp
904
00:23:43,227 --> 00:23:45,451
She should be, she is her daughter.
905
00:23:45,461 --> 00:23:45,453
& nbsp
906
00:23:45,463 --> 00:23:47,486
Throughout his life, he did a minimum.
907
00:23:47,496 --> 00:23:47,488
& nbsp
908
00:23:47,498 --> 00:23:49,155
He is not 32.
909
00:23:49,165 --> 00:23:49,157
& nbsp
910
00:23:49,167 --> 00:23:50,689
I never hate that guy.
911
00:23:50,699 --> 00:23:50,691
& nbsp
912
00:23:50,701 --> 00:23:54,359
I mean, I know he also ran his mouth
lots and he played class clowns...
913
00:23:54,369 --> 00:23:54,361
& nbsp
914
00:23:54,371 --> 00:23:57,864
Wow, who, are you defending him
915
00:23:57,874 --> 00:23:57,866
& nbsp
916
00:23:57,876 --> 00:23:59,698
Beautiful, Dad, thank you.
917
00:23:59,708 --> 00:23:59,700
& nbsp
918
00:23:59,710 --> 00:24:01,099
I just say
919
00:24:01,109 --> 00:24:01,101
& nbsp
920
00:24:01,111 --> 00:24:03,770
Maybe he will find the way,
the way, you never know
921
00:24:03,780 --> 00:24:03,772
& nbsp
922
00:24:03,782 --> 00:24:05,937
No, he doesn't want to, Dad.
923
00:24:05,947 --> 00:24:05,939
& nbsp
924
00:24:05,949 --> 00:24:08,174
He is right where he should be.
925
00:24:08,184 --> 00:24:08,176
& nbsp
926
00:24:08,186 --> 00:24:09,308
In hiding.
927
00:24:09,318 --> 00:24:09,310
& nbsp
928
00:24:09,320 --> 00:24:10,877
So I tell this child,
929
00:24:10,887 --> 00:24:10,879
& nbsp
930
00:24:10,889 --> 00:24:14,880
if he doesn't kick the wig,
I take the TV and the car.
931
00:24:14,890 --> 00:24:14,882
& nbsp
932
00:24:14,892 --> 00:24:17,550
What does he do?
What did he do?
933
00:24:17,560 --> 00:24:17,552
& nbsp
934
00:24:17,562 --> 00:24:20,386
He handed me the key
The car, just like that.
935
00:24:20,396 --> 00:24:20,388
& nbsp
936
00:24:20,398 --> 00:24:25,127
I ride rhinos in Guatemala
with a man named Phillip.
937
00:24:25,137 --> 00:24:29,831
& nbsp
938
00:24:29,841 --> 00:24:33,599
So, I drive a car for like a week right?
939
00:24:33,609 --> 00:24:33,601
& nbsp
940
00:24:33,611 --> 00:24:35,768
Come to find out the man
doesn't even have his own car.
941
00:24:35,778 --> 00:24:35,770
& nbsp
942
00:24:35,780 --> 00:24:41,076
I saved a woman and her daughter
from the hotel fire against me.
943
00:24:41,086 --> 00:24:43,277
& nbsp
944
00:24:43,287 --> 00:24:45,043
That's good.
945
00:24:45,053 --> 00:24:45,045
& nbsp
946
00:24:45,055 --> 00:24:46,378
Listen,
947
00:24:46,388 --> 00:24:46,380
& nbsp
948
00:24:46,390 --> 00:24:49,816
I went straight into the house
because I will make rights...
949
00:24:49,826 --> 00:24:49,818
& nbsp
950
00:24:49,828 --> 00:24:53,218
I've caught land sharks in Tijuana.
951
00:24:53,228 --> 00:24:53,220
& nbsp
952
00:24:53,230 --> 00:24:54,286
That's complicated.
953
00:24:54,296 --> 00:24:54,288
& nbsp
954
00:24:54,298 --> 00:24:55,922
Yo, Manny, what happened?
955
00:24:55,932 --> 00:24:55,924
& nbsp
956
00:24:55,934 --> 00:24:57,657
Why do you keep bothering me, bro?
957
00:24:57,667 --> 00:24:57,659
& nbsp
958
00:24:57,669 --> 00:25:01,096
Your story takes too long and I
have a hard time believing them.
959
00:25:01,106 --> 00:25:08,236
& nbsp
960
00:25:08,246 --> 00:25:09,435
[woman singing]
961
00:25:09,445 --> 00:25:09,437
& nbsp
962
00:25:09,447 --> 00:25:11,771
♪ The condom is broken
We have babies ♪
963
00:25:11,781 --> 00:25:11,773
& nbsp
964
00:25:11,783 --> 00:25:15,174
♪ The happiest accident
That I ever knew ♪
965
00:25:15,184 --> 00:25:15,176
& nbsp
966
00:25:15,186 --> 00:25:18,377
♪ He is my John
And I am the woman ♪
967
00:25:18,387 --> 00:25:18,379
& nbsp
968
00:25:18,389 --> 00:25:21,984
♪ I cancel my appointment
For the rest of the time ♪
969
00:25:21,994 --> 00:25:23,351
& nbsp
970
00:25:23,361 --> 00:25:25,717
♪ I love you, John ♪
971
00:25:25,727 --> 00:25:25,719
& nbsp
972
00:25:25,729 --> 00:25:27,355
That's the real name.
973
00:25:27,365 --> 00:25:34,294
& nbsp
974
00:25:34,304 --> 00:25:35,761
Wow.
975
00:25:35,771 --> 00:25:35,763
& nbsp
976
00:25:35,773 --> 00:25:36,862
Don't know where it came from.
977
00:25:36,872 --> 00:25:36,864
& nbsp
978
00:25:36,874 --> 00:25:38,697
Let's not question that.
979
00:25:38,707 --> 00:25:38,699
& nbsp
980
00:25:38,709 --> 00:25:39,764
I like it.
981
00:25:39,774 --> 00:25:39,766
& nbsp
982
00:25:39,776 --> 00:25:41,466
Give me another one.
983
00:25:41,476 --> 00:25:41,468
& nbsp
984
00:25:41,478 --> 00:25:43,436
Mmm.
985
00:25:43,446 --> 00:25:43,438
& nbsp
986
00:25:43,448 --> 00:25:45,036
Well, I have to go on stage.
987
00:25:45,046 --> 00:25:45,038
& nbsp
988
00:25:45,048 --> 00:25:46,205
Okay, I'll be back soon.
989
00:25:46,215 --> 00:25:46,207
& nbsp
990
00:25:46,217 --> 00:25:48,941
Mmm, remember that, okay?
991
00:25:48,951 --> 00:25:48,943
& nbsp
992
00:25:48,953 --> 00:25:49,809
Yes.
993
00:25:49,819 --> 00:25:49,811
& nbsp
994
00:25:49,821 --> 00:25:52,345
[audience claps]
995
00:25:52,355 --> 00:25:52,347
& nbsp
996
00:25:52,357 --> 00:25:55,348
Jenny, you still owe $ 20
for that e-cigarette
997
00:25:55,358 --> 00:25:55,350
& nbsp
998
00:25:55,360 --> 00:25:57,716
[man] Hey, you
999
00:25:57,726 --> 00:25:57,718
& nbsp
1000
00:25:57,728 --> 00:26:00,151
Where are you from?
1001
00:26:00,161 --> 00:26:00,153
& nbsp
1002
00:26:00,163 --> 00:26:03,089
Dress like you in some
old gang or something
1003
00:26:03,099 --> 00:26:03,091
& nbsp
1004
00:26:03,101 --> 00:26:05,157
Do you know what?
I am in a gang.
1005
00:26:05,167 --> 00:26:05,159
& nbsp
1006
00:26:05,169 --> 00:26:08,096
You have heard "Sleep With You
Mother, The Bigger Your House"?
1007
00:26:08,106 --> 00:26:10,631
& nbsp
1008
00:26:10,641 --> 00:26:12,164
Hey, that nonsense isn't funny.
1009
00:26:12,174 --> 00:26:12,166
& nbsp
1010
00:26:12,176 --> 00:26:14,066
Oh, I think the audience thinks it's funny.
1011
00:26:14,076 --> 00:26:14,068
& nbsp
1012
00:26:14,078 --> 00:26:17,203
You know, you sneak in
City is quiet and what isn't
1013
00:26:17,213 --> 00:26:17,205
& nbsp
1014
00:26:17,215 --> 00:26:19,804
with your oily and oily personality.
1015
00:26:19,814 --> 00:26:19,806
& nbsp
1016
00:26:19,816 --> 00:26:21,773
Who knows where you are from?
1017
00:26:21,783 --> 00:26:21,775
& nbsp
1018
00:26:21,785 --> 00:26:24,143
Clint, close your trap
Go drink with your mother
1019
00:26:24,153 --> 00:26:24,145
& nbsp
1020
00:26:24,155 --> 00:26:27,112
Here it is.
A woman after
my own heart
Thank you dear.
1021
00:26:27,122 --> 00:26:27,114
& nbsp
1022
00:26:27,124 --> 00:26:28,516
[crowd laughs]
1023
00:26:28,526 --> 00:26:29,883
& nbsp
1024
00:26:29,893 --> 00:26:31,817
Okay, tough guy.
1025
00:26:31,827 --> 00:26:31,819
& nbsp
1026
00:26:31,829 --> 00:26:33,519
Let's Dance.
1027
00:26:33,529 --> 00:26:33,521
& nbsp
1028
00:26:33,531 --> 00:26:36,391
Wow, that's four words in a row
from you
You might need a nap.
1029
00:26:36,401 --> 00:26:45,499
& nbsp
1030
00:26:45,509 --> 00:26:46,934
[clears throat]
1031
00:26:46,944 --> 00:26:48,636
& nbsp
1032
00:26:48,646 --> 00:26:51,070
Someone cleans this dirt.
1033
00:26:51,080 --> 00:26:51,072
& nbsp
1034
00:26:51,082 --> 00:26:55,241
You must be one of the stupidest people on the planet
1035
00:26:55,251 --> 00:26:55,243
& nbsp
1036
00:26:55,253 --> 00:26:58,144
I told you to lie low
and you fight
1037
00:26:58,154 --> 00:26:58,146
& nbsp
1038
00:26:58,156 --> 00:27:01,483
with one of the locals when doing comedy?
1039
00:27:01,493 --> 00:27:02,649
& nbsp
1040
00:27:02,659 --> 00:27:04,516
Let me put it like this.
1041
00:27:04,526 --> 00:27:04,518
& nbsp
1042
00:27:04,528 --> 00:27:08,721
You just made my life twice as hard as that
and it's almost impossible
1043
00:27:08,731 --> 00:27:08,723
& nbsp
1044
00:27:08,733 --> 00:27:10,923
remember what I have
high blood pressure,
1045
00:27:10,933 --> 00:27:10,925
& nbsp
1046
00:27:10,935 --> 00:27:14,592
love dark alcohol
and gambling addiction.
1047
00:27:14,602 --> 00:27:14,594
& nbsp
1048
00:27:14,604 --> 00:27:18,297
Now, listen to me, Sammy,
You have one responsibility,
1049
00:27:18,307 --> 00:27:18,299
& nbsp
1050
00:27:18,309 --> 00:27:20,566
one responsibility,
1051
00:27:20,576 --> 00:27:20,568
& nbsp
1052
00:27:20,578 --> 00:27:21,934
remains boring
1053
00:27:21,944 --> 00:27:21,936
& nbsp
1054
00:27:21,946 --> 00:27:23,535
Do you have that, Sammy?
1055
00:27:23,545 --> 00:27:23,537
& nbsp
1056
00:27:23,547 --> 00:27:25,072
Keep boring
1057
00:27:25,082 --> 00:27:27,641
& nbsp
1058
00:27:27,651 --> 00:27:29,474
Hi, welcome back to everyone
to Performances.
1059
00:27:29,484 --> 00:27:29,476
& nbsp
1060
00:27:29,486 --> 00:27:33,279
Before we get to my first guest
night, I have to share with you,
1061
00:27:33,289 --> 00:27:33,281
& nbsp
1062
00:27:33,291 --> 00:27:35,647
this video that I got
sent this weekend
1063
00:27:35,657 --> 00:27:35,649
& nbsp
1064
00:27:35,659 --> 00:27:37,449
This is crazy.
1065
00:27:37,459 --> 00:27:37,451
& nbsp
1066
00:27:37,461 --> 00:27:41,286
There is a stand up comedian, he
does his actions and he becomes offended,
1067
00:27:41,296 --> 00:27:41,288
& nbsp
1068
00:27:41,298 --> 00:27:42,855
and then madness occurs later.
1069
00:27:42,865 --> 00:27:42,857
& nbsp
1070
00:27:42,867 --> 00:27:44,122
Have you ever seen this?
1071
00:27:44,132 --> 00:27:44,124
& nbsp
1072
00:27:44,134 --> 00:27:46,524
It's like John Gotti who does mic night opening,
1073
00:27:46,534 --> 00:27:46,526
& nbsp
1074
00:27:46,536 --> 00:27:51,062
Men fight with two people
people in the crowd, can't be trusted
1075
00:27:51,072 --> 00:27:51,064
& nbsp
1076
00:27:51,074 --> 00:27:52,231
Initially, I thought it was fake,
1077
00:27:52,241 --> 00:27:52,233
& nbsp
1078
00:27:52,243 --> 00:27:54,399
But, apparently, it's not like that, just look.
1079
00:27:54,409 --> 00:27:54,401
& nbsp
1080
00:27:54,411 --> 00:27:58,340
Wow, that's four words in a row
from you
You might need a nap.
1081
00:27:58,350 --> 00:28:01,476
& nbsp
1082
00:28:01,486 --> 00:28:03,041
Excuse me, woman,
1083
00:28:03,051 --> 00:28:03,043
& nbsp
1084
00:28:03,053 --> 00:28:04,143
what do you see?
1085
00:28:04,153 --> 00:28:04,145
& nbsp
1086
00:28:04,155 --> 00:28:06,478
- We watch you
- Excuse me?
1087
00:28:06,488 --> 00:28:06,480
& nbsp
1088
00:28:06,490 --> 00:28:08,414
Yes, surely you are.
1089
00:28:08,424 --> 00:28:08,416
& nbsp
1090
00:28:08,426 --> 00:28:11,817
Hit Clint with
everyone in the city watching
1091
00:28:11,827 --> 00:28:11,819
& nbsp
1092
00:28:11,829 --> 00:28:12,984
This is rather sexy.
1093
00:28:12,994 --> 00:28:12,986
& nbsp
1094
00:28:12,996 --> 00:28:14,153
What are you talking about?
1095
00:28:14,163 --> 00:28:14,155
& nbsp
1096
00:28:14,165 --> 00:28:16,621
Not bad for small town comics.
1097
00:28:16,631 --> 00:28:16,623
& nbsp
1098
00:28:16,633 --> 00:28:19,090
Better than Bieber when he started.
1099
00:28:19,100 --> 00:28:19,092
& nbsp
1100
00:28:19,102 --> 00:28:22,128
Even so
is like three times older.
1101
00:28:22,138 --> 00:28:22,130
& nbsp
1102
00:28:22,140 --> 00:28:23,061
Old?
1103
00:28:23,071 --> 00:28:23,063
& nbsp
1104
00:28:23,073 --> 00:28:24,597
My hair is still in fifth grade.
1105
00:28:24,607 --> 00:28:24,599
& nbsp
1106
00:28:24,609 --> 00:28:27,265
I want to see what you are
Father's hair looks like at 35.
1107
00:28:27,275 --> 00:28:27,267
& nbsp
1108
00:28:27,277 --> 00:28:30,802
My father was attacked
lightning in a fair country
1109
00:28:30,812 --> 00:28:30,804
& nbsp
1110
00:28:30,814 --> 00:28:32,471
I am sorry to hear it.
1111
00:28:32,481 --> 00:28:32,473
& nbsp
1112
00:28:32,483 --> 00:28:34,407
How does he look pre-strike?
1113
00:28:34,417 --> 00:28:34,409
& nbsp
1114
00:28:34,419 --> 00:28:36,711
[playing rock music]
1115
00:28:36,721 --> 00:28:52,392
& nbsp
1116
00:28:52,402 --> 00:28:54,763
♪
1117
00:28:54,773 --> 00:29:07,441
& nbsp
1118
00:29:07,451 --> 00:29:09,510
Someone cleans this dirt.
1119
00:29:09,520 --> 00:29:11,344
& nbsp
1120
00:29:11,354 --> 00:29:14,746
500,000 viewed
1121
00:29:14,756 --> 00:29:14,748
& nbsp
1122
00:29:14,758 --> 00:29:17,015
This, you like, is famous.
1123
00:29:17,025 --> 00:29:17,017
& nbsp
1124
00:29:17,027 --> 00:29:20,151
And they love you, like,
see this comment, uh...
1125
00:29:20,161 --> 00:29:20,153
& nbsp
1126
00:29:20,163 --> 00:29:23,822
"My lord, do Dice Clay and
George Lopez have a baby?"
1127
00:29:23,832 --> 00:29:23,824
& nbsp
1128
00:29:23,834 --> 00:29:25,457
"This person has everything."
1129
00:29:25,467 --> 00:29:25,459
& nbsp
1130
00:29:25,469 --> 00:29:27,126
Uh oh.
1131
00:29:27,136 --> 00:29:27,128
& nbsp
1132
00:29:27,138 --> 00:29:31,397
"Greet me a little
Friends, I like this comic."
1133
00:29:31,407 --> 00:29:31,399
& nbsp
1134
00:29:31,409 --> 00:29:33,301
Someone finds their call.
1135
00:29:33,311 --> 00:29:36,169
& nbsp
1136
00:29:36,179 --> 00:29:38,838
[Sal] He texted again, "K".
1137
00:29:38,848 --> 00:29:38,840
& nbsp
1138
00:29:38,850 --> 00:29:40,138
What is that?
1139
00:29:40,148 --> 00:29:40,140
& nbsp
1140
00:29:40,150 --> 00:29:43,475
"K" is just solid
response, don't read it.
1141
00:29:43,485 --> 00:29:43,477
& nbsp
1142
00:29:43,487 --> 00:29:45,711
"K" is a verbal puncture.
1143
00:29:45,721 --> 00:29:45,713
& nbsp
1144
00:29:45,723 --> 00:29:47,445
This is your money, Frank.
1145
00:29:47,455 --> 00:29:47,447
& nbsp
1146
00:29:47,457 --> 00:29:48,981
Yo.
1147
00:29:48,991 --> 00:29:48,983
& nbsp
1148
00:29:48,993 --> 00:29:51,219
Your friend, Sammy
blew up on the internet
1149
00:29:51,229 --> 00:29:52,652
& nbsp
1150
00:29:52,662 --> 00:29:54,186
- Excuse me?
- Yeah.
1151
00:29:54,196 --> 00:29:54,188
& nbsp
1152
00:29:54,198 --> 00:29:56,522
I mean, who knows how funny this guy is.
1153
00:29:56,532 --> 00:29:56,524
& nbsp
1154
00:29:56,534 --> 00:29:57,490
And he's badass.
1155
00:29:57,500 --> 00:29:57,492
& nbsp
1156
00:29:57,502 --> 00:29:59,625
What are you talking about, Chucky?
1157
00:29:59,635 --> 00:29:59,627
& nbsp
1158
00:29:59,637 --> 00:30:00,725
Sammy has left.
1159
00:30:00,735 --> 00:30:00,727
& nbsp
1160
00:30:00,737 --> 00:30:02,763
No, not him.
He is back, look.
1161
00:30:02,773 --> 00:30:06,967
& nbsp
1162
00:30:06,977 --> 00:30:09,702
[crowd shouting]
1163
00:30:09,712 --> 00:30:09,704
& nbsp
1164
00:30:09,714 --> 00:30:12,303
I want this city rat to die.
1165
00:30:12,313 --> 00:30:12,305
& nbsp
1166
00:30:12,315 --> 00:30:13,438
Done
1167
00:30:13,448 --> 00:30:13,440
& nbsp
1168
00:30:13,450 --> 00:30:14,907
We will find his butt.
1169
00:30:14,917 --> 00:30:14,909
& nbsp
1170
00:30:14,919 --> 00:30:18,343
You know you really messed up with this whole video.
1171
00:30:18,353 --> 00:30:18,345
& nbsp
1172
00:30:18,355 --> 00:30:21,379
I mean, what's popular is
the worst thing you can do right now.
1173
00:30:21,389 --> 00:30:21,381
& nbsp
1174
00:30:21,391 --> 00:30:23,448
It's not my fault,
The man is denouncing me.
1175
00:30:23,458 --> 00:30:23,450
& nbsp
1176
00:30:23,460 --> 00:30:25,150
What should I do?
I have to protect myself.
1177
00:30:25,160 --> 00:30:25,152
& nbsp
1178
00:30:25,162 --> 00:30:27,953
He is lucky I did not stab
him with the damn mic
1179
00:30:27,963 --> 00:30:27,955
& nbsp
1180
00:30:27,965 --> 00:30:29,021
A piece of dirt
1181
00:30:29,031 --> 00:30:29,023
& nbsp
1182
00:30:29,033 --> 00:30:30,522
No one is stabbed.
1183
00:30:30,532 --> 00:30:30,524
& nbsp
1184
00:30:30,534 --> 00:30:33,224
I will need a very detailed account
1185
00:30:33,234 --> 00:30:33,226
& nbsp
1186
00:30:33,236 --> 00:30:35,860
about your whereabouts at any time, okay?
1187
00:30:35,870 --> 00:30:35,862
& nbsp
1188
00:30:35,872 --> 00:30:37,163
I'll make sure you're okay.
1189
00:30:37,173 --> 00:30:37,165
& nbsp
1190
00:30:37,175 --> 00:30:40,032
I go from house to house
bar, you know my schedule
1191
00:30:40,042 --> 00:30:40,034
& nbsp
1192
00:30:40,044 --> 00:30:41,934
I am dead.
1193
00:30:41,944 --> 00:30:41,936
& nbsp
1194
00:30:41,946 --> 00:30:43,435
This is not good.
1195
00:30:43,445 --> 00:30:43,437
& nbsp
1196
00:30:43,447 --> 00:30:45,870
You spend a lot of time
with that Vicky, right?
1197
00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:45,872
& nbsp
1198
00:30:45,882 --> 00:30:47,541
So I need the address.
1199
00:30:47,551 --> 00:30:57,618
& nbsp
1200
00:30:57,628 --> 00:31:00,051
Mr. Hesh?
1201
00:31:00,061 --> 00:31:00,053
& nbsp
1202
00:31:00,063 --> 00:31:01,486
I have to be honest with you
1203
00:31:01,496 --> 00:31:01,488
& nbsp
1204
00:31:01,498 --> 00:31:03,155
The last time someone said that to me,
1205
00:31:03,165 --> 00:31:03,157
& nbsp
1206
00:31:03,167 --> 00:31:05,023
my boyfriend said he
liked my best friend better & nbsp
1207
00:31:05,033 --> 00:31:05,025
Oh that's too bad.
1208
00:31:05,035 --> 00:31:06,291
& nbsp
1209
00:31:06,301 --> 00:31:06,293
My friend is a
Girl, so it's okay.
1210
00:31:06,303 --> 00:31:08,359
& nbsp
1211
00:31:08,369 --> 00:31:08,361
A little golden but that
brings my sensitive side.
1212
00:31:08,371 --> 00:31:11,597
& nbsp
1213
00:31:11,607 --> 00:31:11,599
I know you're good.
1214
00:31:11,609 --> 00:31:12,964
1215
00:31:12,974 --> 00:31:12,966
& nbsp
1216
00:31:12,976 --> 00:31:15,868
You have my time
have never heard of it for years.
1217
00:31:15,878 --> 00:31:15,870
& nbsp
1218
00:31:15,880 --> 00:31:17,770
Natural delivery
1219
00:31:17,780 --> 00:31:17,772
& nbsp
1220
00:31:17,782 --> 00:31:20,138
Like Dangerfield or Dice.
1221
00:31:20,148 --> 00:31:20,140
& nbsp
1222
00:31:20,150 --> 00:31:24,743
Now I don't want to say it
Pryor but I catch a glimpse.
1223
00:31:24,753 --> 00:31:24,745
& nbsp
1224
00:31:24,755 --> 00:31:27,213
Are you trying to make love to me?
I
just joke about the sensitive side.
1225
00:31:27,223 --> 00:31:27,215
& nbsp
1226
00:31:27,225 --> 00:31:29,948
Fuck?
I booked the Majestic Theater.
1227
00:31:29,958 --> 00:31:29,950
& nbsp
1228
00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:31,449
There is no nonsense
1229
00:31:31,459 --> 00:31:31,451
& nbsp
1230
00:31:31,461 --> 00:31:34,986
I ordered Rascal Flatts last week and hand to God, everything was sold out.
1231
00:31:34,996 --> 00:31:34,988
& nbsp
1232
00:31:34,998 --> 00:31:38,357
and my new client, Todd Player,
1233
00:31:38,367 --> 00:31:38,359
& nbsp
1234
00:31:38,369 --> 00:31:40,192
he will perform there next week.
1235
00:31:40,202 --> 00:31:40,194
& nbsp
1236
00:31:40,204 --> 00:31:42,962
Well, look at that, two artists
I've never heard of it.
1237
00:31:42,972 --> 00:31:42,964
& nbsp
1238
00:31:42,974 --> 00:31:44,797
Mr. Hesh...
1239
00:31:44,807 --> 00:31:44,799
& nbsp
1240
00:31:44,809 --> 00:31:46,564
Derek...
1241
00:31:46,574 --> 00:31:46,566
& nbsp
1242
00:31:46,576 --> 00:31:48,734
Bobbale...
1243
00:31:48,744 --> 00:31:48,736
& nbsp
1244
00:31:48,746 --> 00:31:51,369
I want you to open it for Todd.
1245
00:31:51,379 --> 00:31:51,371
& nbsp
1246
00:31:51,381 --> 00:31:53,371
That's right, describe this,
1247
00:31:53,381 --> 00:31:53,373
& nbsp
1248
00:31:53,383 --> 00:31:54,772
"Sold out"
1249
00:31:54,782 --> 00:31:54,774
& nbsp
1250
00:31:54,784 --> 00:31:57,676
You can sell items after that
The show, if you get it.
1251
00:31:57,686 --> 00:31:57,678
& nbsp
1252
00:31:57,688 --> 00:31:59,177
Oh,
1253
00:31:59,187 --> 00:31:59,179
& nbsp
1254
00:31:59,189 --> 00:32:01,282
and pay five thousand.
1255
00:32:01,292 --> 00:32:03,851
& nbsp
1256
00:32:03,861 --> 00:32:05,684
Let me understand this
1257
00:32:05,694 --> 00:32:05,686
& nbsp
1258
00:32:05,696 --> 00:32:09,187
You will pay me $ 5,000 to tell jokes.
1259
00:32:09,197 --> 00:32:09,189
& nbsp
1260
00:32:09,199 --> 00:32:12,491
I can sell anything
The merchandise I want afterwards.
1261
00:32:12,501 --> 00:32:12,493
& nbsp
1262
00:32:12,503 --> 00:32:14,996
Is this a hoax?
Who sent you here & nbsp
1263
00:32:15,006 --> 00:32:16,630
Huh?
Who sent you here & nbsp
1264
00:32:16,640 --> 00:32:18,532
What happens to the tail end of the subku?
1265
00:32:18,542 --> 00:32:20,568
& nbsp
1266
00:32:20,578 --> 00:32:22,771
- What?
- Sub tail,
1267
00:32:22,781 --> 00:32:24,537
& nbsp
1268
00:32:24,547 --> 00:32:26,705
that's the best part
1269
00:32:26,715 --> 00:32:26,707
& nbsp
1270
00:32:26,717 --> 00:32:28,474
When cheese and meat and peppers,
1271
00:32:28,484 --> 00:32:28,476
1272
00:32:28,486 --> 00:32:30,842
1273
00:32:30,852 --> 00:32:30,844
& nbsp
1274
00:32:30,854 --> 00:32:35,481
they all accidentally moved
the tail end of the bread situation.
1275
00:32:35,491 --> 00:32:35,483
& nbsp
1276
00:32:37,126 --> 00:32:37,118
& nbsp
1277
00:32:37,128 --> 00:32:39,721
Yes, it's all about the meat
The ratio of bread to me too, Pat.
1278
00:32:39,731 --> 00:32:41,155
& nbsp
1279
00:32:41,165 --> 00:32:42,557
[cellphone beeps]
1280
00:32:42,567 --> 00:32:45,693
& nbsp
1281
00:32:45,703 --> 00:32:48,060
He cheats.
I know it.
1282
00:32:48,070 --> 00:32:48,062
& nbsp
1283
00:32:48,072 --> 00:32:49,994
Enough.
1284
00:32:50,004 --> 00:32:49,996
& nbsp
1285
00:32:50,006 --> 00:32:51,897
Alright, listen.
1286
00:32:51,907 --> 00:32:51,899
& nbsp
1287
00:32:51,909 --> 00:32:54,265
I have a guy inside.
1288
00:32:54,275 --> 00:32:54,267
& nbsp
1289
00:32:54,277 --> 00:32:56,467
I met him while inside.
1290
00:32:56,477 --> 00:32:56,469
& nbsp
1291
00:32:56,479 --> 00:32:59,306
He will meet your
and bring us to Sammy.
1292
00:32:59,316 --> 00:33:06,980
& nbsp
1293
00:33:06,990 --> 00:33:08,882
I hope they have this in heaven.
1294
00:33:08,892 --> 00:33:14,054
& nbsp
1295
00:33:14,064 --> 00:33:15,888
Some men appear to the bar,
1296
00:33:15,898 --> 00:33:15,890
& nbsp
1297
00:33:15,900 --> 00:33:18,791
offer me $ 5,000 to appear.
1298
00:33:18,801 --> 00:33:18,793
& nbsp
1299
00:33:18,803 --> 00:33:20,192
- Are you serious?
- Mm-hmm.
1300
00:33:20,202 --> 00:33:20,194
& nbsp
1301
00:33:20,204 --> 00:33:21,894
Oh my God.
1302
00:33:21,904 --> 00:33:21,896
& nbsp
1303
00:33:21,906 --> 00:33:23,330
That's amazing.
1304
00:33:23,340 --> 00:33:24,398
& nbsp
1305
00:33:24,408 --> 00:33:27,066
I have never met anyone like you.
1306
00:33:27,076 --> 00:33:27,068
& nbsp
1307
00:33:27,078 --> 00:33:29,635
I have never met anyone like me.
1308
00:33:29,645 --> 00:33:29,637
& nbsp
1309
00:33:29,647 --> 00:33:31,637
I can't do it.
1310
00:33:31,647 --> 00:33:31,639
& nbsp
1311
00:33:31,649 --> 00:33:32,840
Why not?
1312
00:33:32,850 --> 00:33:34,542
& nbsp
1313
00:33:34,552 --> 00:33:36,841
This must be 500,000 views,
1314
00:33:36,851 --> 00:33:36,843
& nbsp
1315
00:33:36,853 --> 00:33:38,843
that must be true
1316
00:33:38,853 --> 00:33:38,845
& nbsp
1317
00:33:38,855 --> 00:33:40,611
Or is that a sign?
1318
00:33:40,621 --> 00:33:40,613
& nbsp
1319
00:33:40,623 --> 00:33:42,214
Stop sign.
1320
00:33:42,224 --> 00:33:42,216
& nbsp
1321
00:33:42,226 --> 00:33:43,952
People think you're funny.
1322
00:33:43,962 --> 00:33:46,219
& nbsp
1323
00:33:46,229 --> 00:33:47,654
Not everyone.
1324
00:33:47,664 --> 00:33:49,823
& nbsp
1325
00:33:49,833 --> 00:33:51,825
[muffled pop music]
1326
00:33:51,835 --> 00:33:57,898
& nbsp
1327
00:33:57,908 --> 00:34:00,262
Oh, hi, here it is.
1328
00:34:00,272 --> 00:34:00,264
& nbsp
1329
00:34:00,274 --> 00:34:02,134
OK, so this is how it will happen.
1330
00:34:02,144 --> 00:34:02,136
& nbsp
1331
00:34:02,146 --> 00:34:04,035
When we announce you, you continue.
1332
00:34:04,045 --> 00:34:04,037
& nbsp
1333
00:34:04,047 --> 00:34:07,205
You will see a light in the center
from the room near the sound booth.
1334
00:34:07,215 --> 00:34:07,207
& nbsp
1335
00:34:07,217 --> 00:34:11,509
When the light hits you, you
take your time, but wrap it up
1336
00:34:11,519 --> 00:34:11,511
& nbsp
1337
00:34:11,521 --> 00:34:13,145
And we finish the rest.
1338
00:34:13,155 --> 00:34:13,147
& nbsp
1339
00:34:13,157 --> 00:34:14,846
If I die on stage tonight,
1340
00:34:14,856 --> 00:34:14,848
& nbsp
1341
00:34:14,858 --> 00:34:16,014
I want you to take my ashes
1342
00:34:16,024 --> 00:34:16,016
& nbsp
1343
00:34:16,026 --> 00:34:18,250
and I want you to spread
they are all over Brooklyn, okay?
1344
00:34:18,260 --> 00:34:18,252
& nbsp
1345
00:34:18,262 --> 00:34:19,854
Amit-amit,
pu pu pu
1346
00:34:19,864 --> 00:34:22,822
& nbsp
1347
00:34:22,832 --> 00:34:24,590
You have become a hit
1348
00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:24,592
& nbsp
1349
00:34:24,602 --> 00:34:26,190
Let's give half the money back.
1350
00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:26,192
& nbsp
1351
00:34:26,202 --> 00:34:27,493
People miss the show at any time,
1352
00:34:27,503 --> 00:34:27,495
& nbsp
1353
00:34:27,505 --> 00:34:29,862
just say it's my voice
or something, you know
1354
00:34:29,872 --> 00:34:29,864
& nbsp
1355
00:34:29,874 --> 00:34:31,529
Yo, Bobby, coffee is gone.
1356
00:34:31,539 --> 00:34:31,531
& nbsp
1357
00:34:31,541 --> 00:34:33,264
- I will take care of it in just seconds.
- OK.
1358
00:34:33,274 --> 00:34:33,266
& nbsp
1359
00:34:33,276 --> 00:34:35,199
Todd Player, this is Derek Hesh.
1360
00:34:35,209 --> 00:34:35,201
& nbsp
1361
00:34:35,211 --> 00:34:38,603
Hey, Derek, man, God,
yo, I'm a big fan, man.
1362
00:34:38,613 --> 00:34:38,605
& nbsp
1363
00:34:38,615 --> 00:34:41,139
I like your video,
Damn it hurt, man.
1364
00:34:41,149 --> 00:34:41,141
& nbsp
1365
00:34:41,151 --> 00:34:45,344
Comedy and music, this is like one
and the same, every important note.
1366
00:34:45,354 --> 00:34:45,346
& nbsp
1367
00:34:45,356 --> 00:34:47,513
- I admire you, man.
- Thank you.
1368
00:34:47,523 --> 00:34:47,515
& nbsp
1369
00:34:47,525 --> 00:34:50,215
I always hear if opening actions
Sucks, the whole show is washed.
1370
00:34:50,225 --> 00:34:50,217
& nbsp
1371
00:34:50,227 --> 00:34:53,317
You take a big risk
here, seriously, I tell you
1372
00:34:53,327 --> 00:34:53,319
& nbsp
1373
00:34:53,329 --> 00:34:55,253
I can go and no
I even know I'm here.
1374
00:34:55,263 --> 00:34:55,255
& nbsp
1375
00:34:55,265 --> 00:34:56,822
Derek, I'm at risk.
1376
00:34:56,832 --> 00:34:56,824
& nbsp
1377
00:34:56,834 --> 00:35:00,025
My strange hand slides from above
Rockies in the middle of winter.
1378
00:35:00,035 --> 00:35:00,027
& nbsp
1379
00:35:00,037 --> 00:35:02,161
Are Steel 1000.
1380
00:35:02,171 --> 00:35:02,163
& nbsp
1381
00:35:02,173 --> 00:35:03,462
Only in a wrangler jeep.
1382
00:35:03,472 --> 00:35:03,464
& nbsp
1383
00:35:03,474 --> 00:35:05,797
Swimming with sharks in Dominica...
1384
00:35:05,807 --> 00:35:05,799
& nbsp
1385
00:35:05,809 --> 00:35:06,898
[whispering] naked
1386
00:35:06,908 --> 00:35:06,900
& nbsp
1387
00:35:06,910 --> 00:35:08,333
You want to open it yourself
1388
00:35:08,343 --> 00:35:08,335
& nbsp
1389
00:35:08,345 --> 00:35:09,802
You get a fucking resume
1390
00:35:09,812 --> 00:35:09,804
& nbsp
1391
00:35:09,814 --> 00:35:13,138
Dude, come on, you know, everything
night, I ride the stage right?
1392
00:35:13,148 --> 00:35:13,140
& nbsp
1393
00:35:13,150 --> 00:35:17,241
And I sang a song about
missing pussy and dog escape
1394
00:35:17,251 --> 00:35:17,243
& nbsp
1395
00:35:17,253 --> 00:35:19,210
and the damn people will be bad luck,
1396
00:35:19,220 --> 00:35:19,212
& nbsp
1397
00:35:19,222 --> 00:35:22,614
But you, you do important nonsense.
1398
00:35:22,624 --> 00:35:22,616
& nbsp
1399
00:35:22,626 --> 00:35:25,918
Yes, man, you're saving the earth.
1400
00:35:25,928 --> 00:35:25,920
& nbsp
1401
00:35:25,930 --> 00:35:27,453
I think I'm a damn fraud.
1402
00:35:27,463 --> 00:35:27,455
& nbsp
1403
00:35:27,465 --> 00:35:29,621
- There are no men.
- I do
1404
00:35:29,631 --> 00:35:29,623
& nbsp
1405
00:35:29,633 --> 00:35:32,123
I want to tell you something, my friend,
1406
00:35:32,133 --> 00:35:32,125
& nbsp
1407
00:35:32,135 --> 00:35:33,695
Because you have sad eyes,
1408
00:35:33,705 --> 00:35:35,395
& nbsp
1409
00:35:35,405 --> 00:35:38,297
I am a bar mitzvahed at the Wailing Wall.
1410
00:35:38,307 --> 00:35:38,299
& nbsp
1411
00:35:38,309 --> 00:35:40,199
My real name is Todd Silverstein,
1412
00:35:40,209 --> 00:35:40,201
& nbsp
1413
00:35:40,211 --> 00:35:41,699
I'm a boy of Jewish memos
1414
00:35:41,709 --> 00:35:41,701
& nbsp
1415
00:35:41,711 --> 00:35:43,802
and a lesbian Hebrew school teacher.
1416
00:35:43,812 --> 00:35:43,804
& nbsp
1417
00:35:43,814 --> 00:35:45,170
Go from here
1418
00:35:45,180 --> 00:35:45,172
& nbsp
1419
00:35:45,182 --> 00:35:46,638
Crane, mazel tov.
1420
00:35:46,648 --> 00:35:46,640
& nbsp
1421
00:35:46,650 --> 00:35:49,373
[announcer] Ladies and
Gentlemen, come to the stage,
1422
00:35:49,383 --> 00:35:49,375
& nbsp
1423
00:35:49,385 --> 00:35:52,377
away from you
environmental watering holes,
1424
00:35:52,387 --> 00:35:52,379
& nbsp
1425
00:35:52,389 --> 00:35:55,746
please give a warm welcome from Wisconsin,
1426
00:35:55,756 --> 00:35:55,748
& nbsp
1427
00:35:55,758 --> 00:35:58,019
-... for Derek Hesh.
- I will be right back.
1428
00:35:58,029 --> 00:35:59,620
& nbsp
1429
00:35:59,630 --> 00:36:01,487
- It's a damn better job.
- You will destroy it
1430
00:36:01,497 --> 00:36:01,489
& nbsp
1431
00:36:01,499 --> 00:36:02,855
Thank you, thank you.
1432
00:36:02,865 --> 00:36:02,857
& nbsp
1433
00:36:02,867 --> 00:36:05,723
You might want me
to sing a little something to you
1434
00:36:05,733 --> 00:36:05,725
& nbsp
1435
00:36:05,735 --> 00:36:07,993
- Like a little something.
Let's rock it.
- No, I'm fine
1436
00:36:08,003 --> 00:36:07,995
& nbsp
1437
00:36:08,005 --> 00:36:10,295
♪ Something about the way ♪
1438
00:36:10,305 --> 00:36:10,297
& nbsp
1439
00:36:10,307 --> 00:36:13,998
♪ He keeps me going ♪
1440
00:36:14,008 --> 00:36:14,000
& nbsp
1441
00:36:14,010 --> 00:36:19,904
♪ And I keep coming
behind for more ♪
1442
00:36:19,914 --> 00:36:19,906
& nbsp
1443
00:36:19,916 --> 00:36:22,340
You might want me to continue or...?
1444
00:36:22,350 --> 00:36:22,342
& nbsp
1445
00:36:22,352 --> 00:36:24,775
- No, no...
- Sorry I said pussy
1446
00:36:24,785 --> 00:36:24,777
& nbsp
1447
00:36:24,787 --> 00:36:25,777
Vagina.
1448
00:36:25,787 --> 00:36:25,779
& nbsp
1449
00:36:25,789 --> 00:36:27,880
You look like Tom Selleck fucked a badger.
1450
00:36:27,890 --> 00:36:27,882
& nbsp
1451
00:36:27,892 --> 00:36:30,181
[audience] Oh.
1452
00:36:30,191 --> 00:36:30,183
& nbsp
1453
00:36:30,193 --> 00:36:31,884
I have to give you credit.
1454
00:36:31,894 --> 00:36:31,886
& nbsp
1455
00:36:31,896 --> 00:36:34,819
You have several balls leaving
home with that face
1456
00:36:34,829 --> 00:36:34,821
& nbsp
1457
00:36:34,831 --> 00:36:36,154
He's cool.
1458
00:36:36,164 --> 00:36:36,156
& nbsp
1459
00:36:36,166 --> 00:36:37,922
Maybe we take it to the road with us.
1460
00:36:37,932 --> 00:36:37,924
& nbsp
1461
00:36:37,934 --> 00:36:39,193
This is not a bad idea.
1462
00:36:39,203 --> 00:36:41,362
& nbsp
1463
00:36:41,372 --> 00:36:42,460
You see my cocaine
1464
00:36:42,470 --> 00:36:42,462
& nbsp
1465
00:36:42,472 --> 00:36:43,929
- no
- Nyquil?
1466
00:36:43,939 --> 00:36:43,931
& nbsp
1467
00:36:43,941 --> 00:36:45,364
No.
1468
00:36:45,374 --> 00:36:45,366
& nbsp
1469
00:36:45,376 --> 00:36:49,868
It might destroy me some Vibrin and
baby aspirin and put it on my hummus.
1470
00:36:49,878 --> 00:36:49,870
& nbsp
1471
00:36:49,880 --> 00:36:51,636
You understand
1472
00:36:51,646 --> 00:36:51,638
& nbsp
1473
00:36:51,648 --> 00:36:54,273
Poor father, poor father.
1474
00:36:54,283 --> 00:36:54,275
& nbsp
1475
00:36:54,285 --> 00:36:56,875
I'm sure he hopes he pulls it out.
1476
00:36:56,885 --> 00:36:56,877
& nbsp
1477
00:36:56,887 --> 00:36:59,247
How does it feel to put it?
Your parents in therapy?
1478
00:36:59,257 --> 00:37:01,315
& nbsp
1479
00:37:01,325 --> 00:37:02,848
I see...
1480
00:37:02,858 --> 00:37:02,850
& nbsp
1481
00:37:02,860 --> 00:37:04,449
You and Derek.
1482
00:37:04,459 --> 00:37:04,451
& nbsp
1483
00:37:04,461 --> 00:37:05,953
You are serious or what
1484
00:37:05,963 --> 00:37:07,855
& nbsp
1485
00:37:07,865 --> 00:37:09,587
Very.
1486
00:37:09,597 --> 00:37:09,589
& nbsp
1487
00:37:09,599 --> 00:37:10,489
I see...
1488
00:37:10,499 --> 00:37:10,491
& nbsp
1489
00:37:10,501 --> 00:37:11,889
Not really, then?
1490
00:37:11,899 --> 00:37:11,891
& nbsp
1491
00:37:11,901 --> 00:37:13,093
I understand.
1492
00:37:13,103 --> 00:37:14,194
& nbsp
1493
00:37:14,204 --> 00:37:15,596
Very.
1494
00:37:15,606 --> 00:37:17,196
& nbsp
1495
00:37:17,206 --> 00:37:18,864
I will poke you on Facebook.
1496
00:37:18,874 --> 00:37:18,866
& nbsp
1497
00:37:18,876 --> 00:37:21,366
[lots of applause]
1498
00:37:21,376 --> 00:37:21,368
& nbsp
1499
00:37:21,378 --> 00:37:25,404
Give to construction workers
from the village community, everyone.
1500
00:37:25,414 --> 00:37:25,406
& nbsp
1501
00:37:25,416 --> 00:37:27,538
Doesn't he look like him?
I mean, God.
1502
00:37:27,548 --> 00:37:27,540
& nbsp
1503
00:37:27,550 --> 00:37:29,242
And the mustache.
1504
00:37:29,252 --> 00:37:30,611
& nbsp
1505
00:37:30,621 --> 00:37:33,013
My name is Derek Hesh, thank you very much.
1506
00:37:33,023 --> 00:37:39,886
& nbsp
1507
00:37:39,896 --> 00:37:41,453
We have good performances for you.
1508
00:37:41,463 --> 00:37:41,455
& nbsp
1509
00:37:41,465 --> 00:37:44,156
Todd Player comes to the stage.
1510
00:37:44,166 --> 00:37:44,158
& nbsp
1511
00:37:44,168 --> 00:37:45,660
Thank you very much.
1512
00:37:45,670 --> 00:37:52,165
& nbsp
1513
00:37:52,175 --> 00:37:53,998
That's it.
1514
00:37:54,008 --> 00:37:54,000
& nbsp
1515
00:37:54,010 --> 00:37:59,438
Derek, my dear, you know, I think I can
you on Performances with Ian Cams.
1516
00:37:59,448 --> 00:37:59,440
& nbsp
1517
00:37:59,450 --> 00:38:02,040
- Talk show?
- The only one.
1518
00:38:02,050 --> 00:38:02,042
& nbsp
1519
00:38:02,052 --> 00:38:05,243
I can't do that, listen, I
get a little too popular
1520
00:38:05,253 --> 00:38:05,245
& nbsp
1521
00:38:05,255 --> 00:38:06,511
and I try to keep a low profile,
1522
00:38:06,521 --> 00:38:06,513
& nbsp
1523
00:38:06,523 --> 00:38:08,112
So, that won't happen, okay?
1524
00:38:08,122 --> 00:38:08,114
& nbsp
1525
00:38:08,124 --> 00:38:09,715
But you know,
1526
00:38:09,725 --> 00:38:09,717
& nbsp
1527
00:38:09,727 --> 00:38:13,951
Buble, Buble, he
found at the wedding
1528
00:38:13,961 --> 00:38:13,953
& nbsp
1529
00:38:13,963 --> 00:38:15,356
Who sucks?
1530
00:38:15,366 --> 00:38:17,824
& nbsp
1531
00:38:17,834 --> 00:38:19,458
I'm annoying
1532
00:38:19,468 --> 00:38:19,460
& nbsp
1533
00:38:19,470 --> 00:38:20,958
I will bring the book.
1534
00:38:20,968 --> 00:38:20,960
& nbsp
1535
00:38:20,970 --> 00:38:21,994
Please, don't
1536
00:38:22,004 --> 00:38:21,996
& nbsp
1537
00:38:22,006 --> 00:38:24,128
- This is a good reading
- I don't read
1538
00:38:24,138 --> 00:38:24,130
& nbsp
1539
00:38:24,140 --> 00:38:26,163
- You know what, Derek, can I hug you?
- No.
1540
00:38:26,173 --> 00:38:26,165
& nbsp
1541
00:38:27,508 --> 00:38:27,500
& nbsp
1542
00:38:27,510 --> 00:38:28,699
- Can I hug you?
- Don't touch me
1543
00:38:28,709 --> 00:38:28,701
& nbsp
1544
00:38:28,711 --> 00:38:29,768
- Can I touch your face?
- No.
1545
00:38:29,778 --> 00:38:29,770
& nbsp
1546
00:38:29,780 --> 00:38:31,069
Well, what about this?
1547
00:38:31,079 --> 00:38:31,071
& nbsp
1548
00:38:31,081 --> 00:38:33,772
You want eight Thai boys
massaging you with naked shorts
1549
00:38:33,782 --> 00:38:33,774
& nbsp
1550
00:38:33,784 --> 00:38:36,574
and whisper sweet words
in your ears?
You understand
1551
00:38:36,584 --> 00:38:36,576
& nbsp
1552
00:38:36,586 --> 00:38:38,810
You want a line
geisha to do magic tricks,
1553
00:38:38,820 --> 00:38:38,812
& nbsp
1554
00:38:38,822 --> 00:38:41,980
pulling rabbits out of them
Bastards when they whistle Dixie?
1555
00:38:41,990 --> 00:38:41,982
& nbsp
1556
00:38:41,992 --> 00:38:43,081
You understand
1557
00:38:43,091 --> 00:38:43,083
& nbsp
1558
00:38:43,093 --> 00:38:44,248
Because I'm your guy
1559
00:38:44,258 --> 00:38:44,250
& nbsp
1560
00:38:44,260 --> 00:38:47,252
Bob Lifshitz, it's up to
you want, I am your man.
1561
00:38:47,262 --> 00:38:47,254
& nbsp
1562
00:38:47,264 --> 00:38:48,587
- Listen...
- Listen,
1563
00:38:48,597 --> 00:38:48,589
& nbsp
1564
00:38:48,599 --> 00:38:51,223
Bob, not interested, can't do it,
1565
00:38:51,233 --> 00:38:51,225
& nbsp
1566
00:38:51,235 --> 00:38:52,958
will not happen.
1567
00:38:52,968 --> 00:38:52,960
& nbsp
1568
00:38:52,970 --> 00:38:55,694
That's all, it's done,
Get out of here, come on, stop.
1569
00:38:55,704 --> 00:38:55,696
& nbsp
1570
00:38:55,706 --> 00:38:57,265
- All right...
- This is fun, by the way.
1571
00:38:57,275 --> 00:38:59,632
& nbsp
1572
00:38:59,642 --> 00:39:03,935
You know Bob, say he can
Take me at Ian Cams' window.
1573
00:39:03,945 --> 00:39:03,937
& nbsp
1574
00:39:03,947 --> 00:39:04,802
What?
1575
00:39:04,812 --> 00:39:04,804
& nbsp
1576
00:39:04,814 --> 00:39:07,406
- Yeah.
- It was incredible.
1577
00:39:07,416 --> 00:39:07,408
& nbsp
1578
00:39:07,418 --> 00:39:09,540
Will you do it
1579
00:39:09,550 --> 00:39:09,542
& nbsp
1580
00:39:09,552 --> 00:39:11,976
No, I can't do that, no.
1581
00:39:11,986 --> 00:39:11,978
& nbsp
1582
00:39:11,988 --> 00:39:14,282
Why?
This is a good opportunity.
1583
00:39:14,292 --> 00:39:16,382
& nbsp
1584
00:39:16,392 --> 00:39:18,382
Yes, listen, um...
1585
00:39:18,392 --> 00:39:18,384
& nbsp
1586
00:39:18,394 --> 00:39:21,188
I've been wanting to tell you
something, I have to tell you something & nbsp
1587
00:39:21,198 --> 00:39:22,556
And I don't want you to be angry, okay?
1588
00:39:22,566 --> 00:39:25,090
& nbsp
1589
00:39:25,100 --> 00:39:25,092
But...
1590
00:39:25,102 --> 00:39:26,991
& nbsp
1591
00:39:27,001 --> 00:39:26,993
1592
00:39:27,003 --> 00:39:29,293
Here it is, my name is Sammy Legucci,
1593
00:39:29,303 --> 00:39:29,295
& nbsp
1594
00:39:29,305 --> 00:39:31,730
Not Derek Hesh and I enter
Witness Protection Program.
1595
00:39:31,740 --> 00:39:31,732
& nbsp
1596
00:39:31,742 --> 00:39:34,565
In, in, in, what,
do you kill someone?
1597
00:39:34,575 --> 00:39:34,567
& nbsp
1598
00:39:34,577 --> 00:39:35,900
No, no, listen...
1599
00:39:35,910 --> 00:39:35,902
& nbsp
1600
00:39:35,912 --> 00:39:37,268
What are you doing?
1601
00:39:37,278 --> 00:39:37,270
& nbsp
1602
00:39:37,280 --> 00:39:39,737
Only...
1603
00:39:39,747 --> 00:39:39,739
& nbsp
1604
00:39:39,749 --> 00:39:42,340
I am from Brooklyn, New York and
I grew up with some bad people
1605
00:39:42,350 --> 00:39:42,342
& nbsp
1606
00:39:42,352 --> 00:39:43,674
and I do some very bad things
1607
00:39:43,684 --> 00:39:43,676
& nbsp
1608
00:39:43,686 --> 00:39:46,444
and now come back again
and bite my ass.
1609
00:39:46,454 --> 00:39:46,446
& nbsp
1610
00:39:46,456 --> 00:39:48,179
Now I have to testify against them
1611
00:39:48,189 --> 00:39:48,181
& nbsp
1612
00:39:48,191 --> 00:39:50,549
and the government put me here.
1613
00:39:50,559 --> 00:39:50,551
& nbsp
1614
00:39:50,561 --> 00:39:53,185
You know, to protect me for a couple
months until I come back and testify.
1615
00:39:53,195 --> 00:39:53,187
& nbsp
1616
00:39:53,197 --> 00:39:54,953
But only that, it's over, it's over.
1617
00:39:54,963 --> 00:39:54,955
& nbsp
1618
00:39:54,965 --> 00:39:56,721
Okay, so...
1619
00:39:56,731 --> 00:39:56,723
& nbsp
1620
00:39:56,733 --> 00:40:00,157
So, what does this mean for us?
1621
00:40:00,167 --> 00:40:00,159
& nbsp
1622
00:40:00,169 --> 00:40:02,293
No, that doesn't mean anything.
I just want...
1623
00:40:02,303 --> 00:40:02,295
& nbsp
1624
00:40:02,305 --> 00:40:05,263
If I don't care about you, I
won't say anything, but...
1625
00:40:05,273 --> 00:40:05,265
& nbsp
1626
00:40:05,275 --> 00:40:08,202
Listen, I'm sorry, it's just that,
there's one more thing,
1627
00:40:08,212 --> 00:40:10,036
& nbsp
1628
00:40:10,046 --> 00:40:11,902
I have a daughter
1629
00:40:11,912 --> 00:40:11,904
& nbsp
1630
00:40:11,914 --> 00:40:15,175
Yes, and I have to go see him
before all this goes down.
1631
00:40:15,185 --> 00:40:16,609
& nbsp
1632
00:40:16,619 --> 00:40:19,177
I'm sorry.
1633
00:40:19,187 --> 00:40:19,179
& nbsp
1634
00:40:19,189 --> 00:40:20,381
Please.
1635
00:40:20,391 --> 00:40:24,518
& nbsp
1636
00:40:24,528 --> 00:40:27,989
[instrumental soft rock music playing]
1637
00:40:27,999 --> 00:41:17,337
& nbsp
1638
00:41:17,347 --> 00:41:18,936
- How are you?
- good
1639
00:41:18,946 --> 00:41:18,938
& nbsp
1640
00:41:18,948 --> 00:41:20,739
- How is Maddy?
- He is fine.
1641
00:41:20,749 --> 00:41:20,741
& nbsp
1642
00:41:20,751 --> 00:41:22,877
- He is fine.
- Right
1643
00:41:22,887 --> 00:41:41,060
& nbsp
1644
00:41:41,070 --> 00:41:42,960
- Enter and exit right?
- There he is.
1645
00:41:42,970 --> 00:41:42,962
& nbsp
1646
00:41:42,972 --> 00:41:46,565
Well, I mean, forget about my boys
girls make me fear more than them.
1647
00:41:46,575 --> 00:41:46,567
& nbsp
1648
00:41:46,577 --> 00:41:47,866
Tell me about that.
1649
00:41:47,876 --> 00:41:47,868
& nbsp
1650
00:41:47,878 --> 00:41:49,467
- He left, right?
- Yeah.
1651
00:41:49,477 --> 00:41:49,469
& nbsp
1652
00:41:49,479 --> 00:41:51,002
He was in town for several days.
1653
00:41:51,012 --> 00:41:51,004
& nbsp
1654
00:41:51,014 --> 00:41:53,070
OK, good
1655
00:41:53,080 --> 00:41:53,072
& nbsp
1656
00:41:53,082 --> 00:41:54,307
Thank you, Frank.
1657
00:41:54,317 --> 00:42:26,239
& nbsp
1658
00:42:26,249 --> 00:42:27,304
Hi.
1659
00:42:27,314 --> 00:42:27,306
& nbsp
1660
00:42:27,316 --> 00:42:30,474
Why do you have to go?
Not fair, Dad.
1661
00:42:30,484 --> 00:42:30,476
& nbsp
1662
00:42:30,486 --> 00:42:32,076
Maddy, I'll be back, I promise.
1663
00:42:32,086 --> 00:42:32,078
& nbsp
1664
00:42:32,088 --> 00:42:34,913
I can't say exactly when
but I promise, I'll come back
1665
00:42:34,923 --> 00:42:34,915
& nbsp
1666
00:42:34,925 --> 00:42:38,148
Just saw your face.
1667
00:42:38,158 --> 00:42:38,150
& nbsp
1668
00:42:38,160 --> 00:42:40,619
You have nothing else
family somewhere, not
1669
00:42:40,629 --> 00:42:40,621
& nbsp
1670
00:42:40,631 --> 00:42:42,686
What?
No, I don't have another family, baby,
1671
00:42:42,696 --> 00:42:42,688
& nbsp
1672
00:42:42,698 --> 00:42:45,223
No, you're the only family I have.
1673
00:42:45,233 --> 00:42:45,225
& nbsp
1674
00:42:45,235 --> 00:42:47,558
Maddy, I love you so much, okay?
1675
00:42:47,568 --> 00:42:47,560
& nbsp
1676
00:42:47,570 --> 00:42:49,661
And I will come back, I promise, I will do it.
1677
00:42:49,671 --> 00:42:49,663
& nbsp
1678
00:42:49,673 --> 00:42:50,761
Do you think so?
1679
00:42:50,771 --> 00:42:50,763
& nbsp
1680
00:42:50,773 --> 00:42:51,962
I know that, honey.
1681
00:42:51,972 --> 00:42:51,964
& nbsp
1682
00:42:51,974 --> 00:42:54,165
Look, I want you to be a good girl,
1683
00:42:54,175 --> 00:42:54,167
& nbsp
1684
00:42:54,177 --> 00:42:55,967
I want you to listen to your mother, okay?
1685
00:42:55,977 --> 00:42:55,969
& nbsp
1686
00:42:55,979 --> 00:42:58,302
- Good.
- I love you so much.
1687
00:42:58,312 --> 00:42:58,304
& nbsp
1688
00:42:58,314 --> 00:42:59,974
I love you too.
1689
00:42:59,984 --> 00:43:04,777
& nbsp
1690
00:43:04,787 --> 00:43:06,479
I have to go, okay
1691
00:43:06,489 --> 00:43:19,058
& nbsp
1692
00:43:19,068 --> 00:43:21,092
And now, you know, walking to the car,
1693
00:43:21,102 --> 00:43:21,094
& nbsp
1694
00:43:21,104 --> 00:43:23,460
fucking clothes on my neck, my head,
1695
00:43:23,470 --> 00:43:23,462
& nbsp
1696
00:43:23,472 --> 00:43:25,365
Everywhere, I hold it.
1697
00:43:25,375 --> 00:43:27,000
& nbsp
1698
00:43:27,010 --> 00:43:28,933
Go to my car, I look around,
1699
00:43:28,943 --> 00:43:28,935
& nbsp
1700
00:43:28,945 --> 00:43:32,036
It's fucking pulled, gone, nothing is there.
1701
00:43:32,046 --> 00:43:32,038
& nbsp
1702
00:43:32,048 --> 00:43:35,708
So, now, I schlepping to,
uh, my friend's apartment...
1703
00:43:35,718 --> 00:43:39,478
& nbsp
1704
00:43:39,488 --> 00:43:41,045
Must bring Uber here.
1705
00:43:41,055 --> 00:43:41,047
& nbsp
1706
00:43:41,057 --> 00:43:42,246
You bring Uber, right?
1707
00:43:42,256 --> 00:43:42,248
& nbsp
1708
00:43:42,258 --> 00:43:44,482
Do you know that these people can review you?
1709
00:43:44,492 --> 00:43:44,484
& nbsp
1710
00:43:44,494 --> 00:43:46,217
What do you think this is?
reviews Was this review helpful?
1711
00:43:46,227 --> 00:43:46,219
& nbsp
1712
00:43:46,229 --> 00:43:49,123
As if I don't have enough
negative feedback in my life
1713
00:43:49,133 --> 00:43:50,190
& nbsp
1714
00:43:50,200 --> 00:43:51,790
And the technology in this car,
1715
00:43:51,800 --> 00:43:51,792
& nbsp
1716
00:43:51,802 --> 00:43:53,257
You know, you can enter,
1717
00:43:53,267 --> 00:43:53,259
& nbsp
1718
00:43:53,269 --> 00:43:56,328
connect your Spotify, listen
wirelessly.
1719
00:43:56,338 --> 00:43:56,330
& nbsp
1720
00:43:56,340 --> 00:43:59,931
Maybe they should be connected to
Tinder, maybe even the Hotel Tonight,
1721
00:43:59,941 --> 00:43:59,933
& nbsp
1722
00:43:59,943 --> 00:44:04,038
You know, take him out,
Put him down, send him out.
1723
00:44:04,048 --> 00:44:06,138
& nbsp
1724
00:44:06,148 --> 00:44:08,406
Have you ever seen this JSwipe thing?
1725
00:44:08,416 --> 00:44:08,408
& nbsp
1726
00:44:08,418 --> 00:44:10,577
Yes, it's like a Tinder for bad people.
1727
00:44:10,587 --> 00:44:12,145
& nbsp
1728
00:44:12,155 --> 00:44:13,011
Done
1729
00:44:13,021 --> 00:44:13,013
& nbsp
1730
00:44:13,023 --> 00:44:15,282
[cheering and applause]
1731
00:44:15,292 --> 00:44:18,618
& nbsp
1732
00:44:18,628 --> 00:44:20,418
[Sammy] I have to find a better friend.
1733
00:44:20,428 --> 00:44:20,420
& nbsp
1734
00:44:20,430 --> 00:44:23,020
You know, most people have friends
for life, all my friends are living.
1735
00:44:23,030 --> 00:44:23,022
& nbsp
1736
00:44:23,032 --> 00:44:24,822
You know, but I'm new in town.
1737
00:44:24,832 --> 00:44:24,824
& nbsp
1738
00:44:24,834 --> 00:44:27,458
You know, I started dating, I found this
Girl, she has so many personalities.
1739
00:44:27,468 --> 00:44:27,460
& nbsp
1740
00:44:27,470 --> 00:44:30,094
He kept asking me, "Do you even like me?"
1741
00:44:30,104 --> 00:44:30,096
& nbsp
1742
00:44:30,106 --> 00:44:31,730
I'm like, "Yeah, I like
all seven of your versions
1743
00:44:31,740 --> 00:44:31,732
& nbsp
1744
00:44:31,742 --> 00:44:34,866
I like your Sunday, I like you
Tuesday, your Thursday is a little off.
1745
00:44:34,876 --> 00:44:34,868
& nbsp
1746
00:44:34,878 --> 00:44:36,368
Of course , I like you,
You have sex with me. "
1747
00:44:36,378 --> 00:44:36,370
& nbsp
1748
00:44:36,380 --> 00:44:38,103
Hard dating, especially
When you get older,
1749
00:44:38,113 --> 00:44:38,105
& nbsp
1750
00:44:38,115 --> 00:44:39,203
God, I'm old.
1751
00:44:39,213 --> 00:44:39,205
& nbsp
1752
00:44:39,215 --> 00:44:40,871
Do you know how I grow old?
1753
00:44:40,881 --> 00:44:40,873
& nbsp
1754
00:44:40,883 --> 00:44:43,273
I used to play basketball
days, every day, nothing, I'm fine.
1755
00:44:43,283 --> 00:44:43,275
& nbsp
1756
00:44:43,285 --> 00:44:46,613
Yesterday, I pulled my muscles
the neck ordered food and looked to the left.
1757
00:44:46,623 --> 00:44:47,647
& nbsp
1758
00:44:47,657 --> 00:44:49,147
Yes, there is a problem
1759
00:44:49,157 --> 00:44:49,149
& nbsp
1760
00:44:49,159 --> 00:44:52,449
Who is present in the audience?
Everyone in the audience?
1761
00:44:52,459 --> 00:44:52,451
& nbsp
1762
00:44:52,461 --> 00:44:53,817
I got good news for you
1763
00:44:53,827 --> 00:44:53,819
& nbsp
1764
00:44:53,829 --> 00:44:57,355
After this financial crisis,
personality makes a comeback.
1765
00:44:57,365 --> 00:44:57,357
& nbsp
1766
00:44:57,367 --> 00:44:59,757
Personality for sure
makes smart, I swear
1767
00:44:59,767 --> 00:44:59,759
& nbsp
1768
00:44:59,769 --> 00:45:02,562
I have eight jokes and Honda
Accord and I'm fucking everyone.
1769
00:45:02,572 --> 00:45:10,404
& nbsp
1770
00:45:10,414 --> 00:45:14,005
Okay, so, people call like
crazy to order, Sammy.
1771
00:45:14,015 --> 00:45:14,007
& nbsp
1772
00:45:14,017 --> 00:45:16,007
We really can't bring them all.
1773
00:45:16,017 --> 00:45:16,009
& nbsp
1774
00:45:16,019 --> 00:45:18,476
Babe, can we still call me Derek?
1775
00:45:18,486 --> 00:45:18,478
& nbsp
1776
00:45:18,488 --> 00:45:21,348
My fake identity is the only one
I still go here.
1777
00:45:21,358 --> 00:45:22,449
& nbsp
1778
00:45:22,459 --> 00:45:24,148
I really messed up, you know that right?
1779
00:45:24,158 --> 00:45:24,150
& nbsp
1780
00:45:24,160 --> 00:45:26,051
- Why?
- By doing all this
1781
00:45:26,061 --> 00:45:26,053
& nbsp
1782
00:45:26,063 --> 00:45:27,418
Being "Human".
1783
00:45:27,428 --> 00:45:27,420
& nbsp
1784
00:45:27,430 --> 00:45:29,119
Doing standing.
1785
00:45:29,129 --> 00:45:29,121
& nbsp
1786
00:45:29,131 --> 00:45:31,221
I mean, you might think it's cool, but...
1787
00:45:31,231 --> 00:45:31,223
& nbsp
1788
00:45:31,233 --> 00:45:33,690
Where I come from, my friends
Think about this very seriously.
1789
00:45:33,700 --> 00:45:33,692
& nbsp
1790
00:45:33,702 --> 00:45:35,860
Well, what about the people who protect you?
1791
00:45:35,870 --> 00:45:35,862
& nbsp
1792
00:45:35,872 --> 00:45:37,996
What about them
1793
00:45:38,006 --> 00:45:37,998
& nbsp
1794
00:45:38,008 --> 00:45:39,797
If you know where I come from, ha.
1795
00:45:39,807 --> 00:45:39,799
& nbsp
1796
00:45:39,809 --> 00:45:45,069
Yes, okay, look, there is a motel
just past mile marker 61, meet there.
1797
00:45:45,079 --> 00:45:45,071
& nbsp
1798
00:45:45,081 --> 00:45:49,074
And a little talk
maybe, you follow
1799
00:45:49,084 --> 00:45:49,076
& nbsp
1800
00:45:49,086 --> 00:45:51,976
Yes, and bring the money, okay?
1801
00:45:51,986 --> 00:45:51,978
& nbsp
1802
00:45:51,988 --> 00:45:54,878
Of course, I'm sure, how are you...
1803
00:45:54,888 --> 00:45:54,880
& nbsp
1804
00:45:54,890 --> 00:45:57,318
Okay, yes, goodbye.
1805
00:45:57,328 --> 00:46:04,524
& nbsp
1806
00:46:04,534 --> 00:46:08,960
Oh, that feels really good.
I'm glad you're here
1807
00:46:08,970 --> 00:46:08,962
& nbsp
1808
00:46:08,972 --> 00:46:13,130
I know, I'm very happy to be here.
1809
00:46:13,140 --> 00:46:13,132
& nbsp
1810
00:46:13,142 --> 00:46:18,203
Uh, unfortunately, tonight
we can't do anything & nbsp
1811
00:46:18,213 --> 00:46:18,205
What are you talking about
about?
You are here
1812
00:46:18,215 --> 00:46:21,038
& nbsp
1813
00:46:21,048 --> 00:46:21,040
1814
00:46:21,050 --> 00:46:23,907
I know, but my boyfriend just reminded me,
1815
00:46:23,917 --> 00:46:23,909
& nbsp
1816
00:46:23,919 --> 00:46:26,210
- Mercury is in a retrograde state.
- What?
1817
00:46:26,220 --> 00:46:26,212
& nbsp
1818
00:46:26,222 --> 00:46:28,612
What do retrograde have?
to do with you and me?
1819
00:46:28,622 --> 00:46:28,614
& nbsp
1820
00:46:28,624 --> 00:46:30,014
I'm very sensitive now.
1821
00:46:30,024 --> 00:46:30,016
& nbsp
1822
00:46:30,026 --> 00:46:32,449
And sleeping with you tonight
can really make me go
1823
00:46:32,459 --> 00:46:32,451
& nbsp
1824
00:46:32,461 --> 00:46:36,353
What?
You don't even know it's entering retrograde before your friend tells you.
1825
00:46:36,363 --> 00:46:36,355
& nbsp
1826
00:46:36,365 --> 00:46:39,156
I know.
But I know
something must be off
1827
00:46:39,166 --> 00:46:39,158
& nbsp
1828
00:46:39,168 --> 00:46:41,793
I mean, I cried when a commercial "Save Tiger"
1829
00:46:41,803 --> 00:46:41,795
& nbsp
1830
00:46:41,805 --> 00:46:43,895
and I don't even care about tigers.
1831
00:46:43,905 --> 00:46:43,897
& nbsp
1832
00:46:43,907 --> 00:46:47,866
Can't you start this whole?
nonsense backwards tomorrow?
1833
00:46:47,876 --> 00:46:47,868
& nbsp
1834
00:46:47,878 --> 00:46:49,900
I can't, I made a decision this morning & nbsp
1835
00:46:49,910 --> 00:46:49,902
and if there is one thing, you cannot change your mind when Mercury is retrograde.
1836
00:46:49,912 --> 00:46:55,340
& nbsp
1837
00:46:55,350 --> 00:46:55,342
Hmm, well.
1838
00:46:55,352 --> 00:46:57,808
& nbsp
1839
00:46:57,818 --> 00:46:57,810
I think maybe you should go.
1840
00:46:57,820 --> 00:47:00,411
& nbsp
1841
00:47:00,421 --> 00:47:00,413
You want to hug
1842
00:47:00,423 --> 00:47:02,045
& nbsp
1843
00:47:02,055 --> 00:47:02,047
Let's hug.
1844
00:47:02,057 --> 00:47:03,114
& nbsp
1845
00:47:03,124 --> 00:47:03,116
This is a disaster.
1846
00:47:03,126 --> 00:47:04,748
& nbsp
1847
00:47:04,758 --> 00:47:04,750
1848
00:47:04,760 --> 00:47:06,985
No, that's good, there.
1849
00:47:06,995 --> 00:47:06,987
& nbsp
1850
00:47:06,997 --> 00:47:08,422
Yes, yes.
1851
00:47:08,432 --> 00:47:19,466
& nbsp
1852
00:47:19,476 --> 00:47:23,234
I mean, he's not even a talented person.
1853
00:47:23,244 --> 00:47:23,236
& nbsp
1854
00:47:23,246 --> 00:47:25,103
Come on, Sal, you have to stop that crap.
1855
00:47:25,113 --> 00:47:25,105
& nbsp
1856
00:47:25,115 --> 00:47:27,038
Look, Sammy is always funny.
1857
00:47:27,048 --> 00:47:27,040
& nbsp
1858
00:47:27,050 --> 00:47:28,406
He has something about him,
1859
00:47:28,416 --> 00:47:28,408
& nbsp
1860
00:47:28,418 --> 00:47:30,407
You know, he is the type
from men you go to parties...
1861
00:47:30,417 --> 00:47:30,409
& nbsp
1862
00:47:30,419 --> 00:47:33,478
♪ I know when I meet you ♪
1863
00:47:33,488 --> 00:47:33,480
& nbsp
1864
00:47:33,490 --> 00:47:37,114
♪ That I love you
And I need you ♪
1865
00:47:37,124 --> 00:47:37,116
& nbsp
1866
00:47:37,126 --> 00:47:38,849
Sal, what's wrong with you?
1867
00:47:38,859 --> 00:47:38,851
& nbsp
1868
00:47:38,861 --> 00:47:40,354
Damn, Dom.
1869
00:47:40,364 --> 00:47:41,922
& nbsp
1870
00:47:41,932 --> 00:47:43,320
See,
1871
00:47:43,330 --> 00:47:43,322
& nbsp
1872
00:47:43,332 --> 00:47:45,956
I'm the one who plays
peter pan in fifth grade
1873
00:47:45,966 --> 00:47:45,958
& nbsp
1874
00:47:45,968 --> 00:47:47,090
- Jesus Christ.
- Hah?
1875
00:47:47,100 --> 00:47:47,092
& nbsp
1876
00:47:47,102 --> 00:47:49,460
Remember that?
I am doing fine.
1877
00:47:49,470 --> 00:47:49,462
& nbsp
1878
00:47:49,472 --> 00:47:50,862
I'm so great.
1879
00:47:50,872 --> 00:47:50,864
& nbsp
1880
00:47:50,874 --> 00:47:52,764
Fly around and bad luck.
1881
00:47:52,774 --> 00:47:52,766
& nbsp
1882
00:47:52,776 --> 00:47:55,699
Sammy?
He can't even play
one of them loses a boy.
1883
00:47:55,709 --> 00:47:55,701
& nbsp
1884
00:47:55,711 --> 00:47:56,900
All he has to do is play lose.
1885
00:47:56,910 --> 00:47:56,902
& nbsp
1886
00:47:56,912 --> 00:47:58,969
Yes, Star Search,
You will lose it.
1887
00:47:58,979 --> 00:47:58,971
& nbsp
1888
00:47:58,981 --> 00:48:00,471
Good?
Look,
1889
00:48:00,483 --> 00:48:02,639
I don't even want to do this bad Sammy.
1890
00:48:02,651 --> 00:48:04,609
What?
Hunt him,
take our friend
1891
00:48:04,619 --> 00:48:04,611
& nbsp
1892
00:48:04,621 --> 00:48:07,212
Oh yes?
Do you want to go to your uncle
Pat, and say we didn't do it?
1893
00:48:07,222 --> 00:48:07,214
& nbsp
1894
00:48:07,224 --> 00:48:08,980
Guy isn't even my real uncle.
1895
00:48:08,990 --> 00:48:08,982
& nbsp
1896
00:48:08,992 --> 00:48:11,715
He you know, friend of
family who is always at home,
1897
00:48:11,727 --> 00:48:13,518
and you have to call him uncle.
1898
00:48:13,528 --> 00:48:13,520
& nbsp
1899
00:48:13,530 --> 00:48:15,453
Damn, I got a real uncle
Jealous when they heard me call him uncle.
1900
00:48:15,463 --> 00:48:15,455
& nbsp
1901
00:48:15,465 --> 00:48:18,258
It's too late, Dom, it's already moving.
1902
00:48:18,268 --> 00:48:20,627
& nbsp
1903
00:48:20,637 --> 00:48:21,829
Fuck.
1904
00:48:21,839 --> 00:48:25,332
& nbsp
1905
00:48:25,342 --> 00:48:26,663
I can't believe you just sang a song.
1906
00:48:26,673 --> 00:48:26,665
& nbsp
1907
00:48:26,675 --> 00:48:29,433
Hey, I just tried
to show anything
1908
00:48:29,443 --> 00:48:29,435
& nbsp
1909
00:48:29,445 --> 00:48:30,670
Yes.
1910
00:48:30,680 --> 00:48:31,804
& nbsp
1911
00:48:31,814 --> 00:48:34,973
I want to be able to move
him if we need to move it
1912
00:48:34,983 --> 00:48:34,975
& nbsp
1913
00:48:34,985 --> 00:48:37,510
Move him if you want to move it, you say?
1914
00:48:37,520 --> 00:48:38,712
& nbsp
1915
00:48:38,722 --> 00:48:40,677
Achoo.
1916
00:48:40,687 --> 00:48:40,679
& nbsp
1917
00:48:40,689 --> 00:48:42,045
Do you just sneeze?
1918
00:48:42,055 --> 00:48:42,047
& nbsp
1919
00:48:42,057 --> 00:48:43,815
Sounds like you said,
"achoo" but you don't sneeze.
1920
00:48:43,825 --> 00:48:43,817
& nbsp
1921
00:48:43,827 --> 00:48:45,782
Yes, that's how I sneeze.
1922
00:48:45,792 --> 00:48:45,784
& nbsp
1923
00:48:45,794 --> 00:48:47,719
Achoo.
1924
00:48:47,729 --> 00:48:47,721
& nbsp
1925
00:48:47,731 --> 00:48:49,654
- Bless you.
- Thank you.
1926
00:48:49,664 --> 00:48:49,656
& nbsp
1927
00:48:49,666 --> 00:48:50,721
Okay, look.
1928
00:48:50,731 --> 00:48:50,723
& nbsp
1929
00:48:50,733 --> 00:48:52,857
We have to keep getting closer
Eyes at Legucci, okay?
1930
00:48:52,867 --> 00:48:52,859
& nbsp
1931
00:48:52,869 --> 00:48:55,493
We are hired to protect it, we
Can't let this move away from us.
1932
00:48:55,503 --> 00:48:55,495
& nbsp
1933
00:48:55,505 --> 00:48:58,496
I understand.
Sometimes a
Humans must trust their instincts
1934
00:48:58,506 --> 00:48:58,498
& nbsp
1935
00:48:58,508 --> 00:49:00,197
like a cat on a summer sprinkler.
1936
00:49:00,207 --> 00:49:00,199
& nbsp
1937
00:49:00,209 --> 00:49:01,598
What languages are you talking about
1938
00:49:01,608 --> 00:49:01,600
& nbsp
1939
00:49:01,610 --> 00:49:03,634
I don't understand.
1940
00:49:03,644 --> 00:49:03,636
& nbsp
1941
00:49:03,646 --> 00:49:07,205
Listen, let's make it
everyone's life is much easier.
1942
00:49:07,215 --> 00:49:07,207
& nbsp
1943
00:49:07,217 --> 00:49:09,406
You pay more attention to Legucci.
1944
00:49:09,416 --> 00:49:09,408
& nbsp
1945
00:49:09,418 --> 00:49:10,775
No problem.
1946
00:49:10,785 --> 00:49:10,777
& nbsp
1947
00:49:10,787 --> 00:49:12,877
Achoo.
1948
00:49:12,887 --> 00:49:12,879
& nbsp
1949
00:49:12,889 --> 00:49:13,978
Bless you.
1950
00:49:13,988 --> 00:49:13,980
& nbsp
1951
00:49:13,990 --> 00:49:16,714
But, you know, it's like
1952
00:49:16,724 --> 00:49:16,716
& nbsp
1953
00:49:16,726 --> 00:49:19,951
When I first or second wake up
Here, try this whole comedy.
1954
00:49:19,961 --> 00:49:19,953
& nbsp
1955
00:49:19,963 --> 00:49:21,953
I used to make fun of people,
who used to go out of the audience
1956
00:49:21,963 --> 00:49:21,955
& nbsp
1957
00:49:21,965 --> 00:49:24,956
and be like, choose someone
from, I mean it's not comedy.
1958
00:49:24,966 --> 00:49:24,958
& nbsp
1959
00:49:24,968 --> 00:49:26,391
I think I have to tell a joke,
1960
00:49:26,401 --> 00:49:26,393
& nbsp
1961
00:49:26,403 --> 00:49:28,659
I have to start learning how to tell stories.
1962
00:49:28,669 --> 00:49:28,661
& nbsp
1963
00:49:28,671 --> 00:49:30,060
So I'll try some jokes on you guys.
1964
00:49:30,070 --> 00:49:30,062
& nbsp
1965
00:49:30,072 --> 00:49:32,263
Do you like blond jokes?
1966
00:49:32,273 --> 00:49:32,265
& nbsp
1967
00:49:32,275 --> 00:49:36,067
What is a blonde girl?
when did he wake up in the morning?
1968
00:49:36,077 --> 00:49:36,069
& nbsp
1969
00:49:36,079 --> 00:49:37,902
"Which of you invited me home?"
1970
00:49:37,912 --> 00:49:37,904
& nbsp
1971
00:49:37,914 --> 00:49:41,471
A blonde girl was driving to the beach,
she saw a sign that read, "Left Beach",
1972
00:49:41,481 --> 00:49:41,473
& nbsp
1973
00:49:41,483 --> 00:49:43,641
he made a U-turn and returned home.
1974
00:49:43,651 --> 00:49:43,643
& nbsp
1975
00:49:43,653 --> 00:49:45,143
These blonde girls are amazing.
1976
00:49:45,153 --> 00:49:45,145
& nbsp
1977
00:49:45,155 --> 00:49:47,612
Yeah, so this blonde girl
drives on the highway,
1978
00:49:47,622 --> 00:49:47,614
& nbsp
1979
00:49:47,624 --> 00:49:48,880
he cuts some people,
1980
00:49:48,890 --> 00:49:48,882
& nbsp
1981
00:49:48,892 --> 00:49:51,049
and the person pulls the next one
on him and says, "Pull Over".
1982
00:49:51,059 --> 00:49:51,051
& nbsp
1983
00:49:51,061 --> 00:49:53,750
He pulls the car up, he
like, "Get out of the vehicle",
1984
00:49:53,760 --> 00:49:53,752
& nbsp
1985
00:49:53,762 --> 00:49:57,522
take a pencil, draw a circle, say,
"Stay in the circle, don't move".
1986
00:49:57,532 --> 00:49:57,524
& nbsp
1987
00:49:57,534 --> 00:50:00,190
He stands there, he turns around
, picks up a baseball bat,
1988
00:50:00,200 --> 00:50:00,192
& nbsp
1989
00:50:00,202 --> 00:50:01,993
and start breaking all of the windows, boom, boom.
1990
00:50:02,003 --> 00:50:01,995
& nbsp
1991
00:50:02,005 --> 00:50:05,362
He turned around, the girl entered the floor, laughed, ha-ha.
1992
00:50:05,372 --> 00:50:05,364
& nbsp
1993
00:50:05,374 --> 00:50:06,730
He is like, "What's funny?"
1994
00:50:06,740 --> 00:50:06,732
& nbsp
1995
00:50:06,742 --> 00:50:09,801
Take a match, turn it on
cars, blow nonsense.
1996
00:50:09,811 --> 00:50:09,803
& nbsp
1997
00:50:09,813 --> 00:50:11,869
Apparently, the girl
Dead on the floor, laughing.
1998
00:50:11,879 --> 00:50:11,871
& nbsp
1999
00:50:11,881 --> 00:50:14,038
He said, "Are you stupid or stupid?
Something funny?"
2000
00:50:14,048 --> 00:50:14,040
& nbsp
2001
00:50:14,050 --> 00:50:17,741
He goes, "I'm stupid? Every time you
I turn around, I'm out of the circle."
2002
00:50:17,751 --> 00:50:17,743
& nbsp
2003
00:50:17,753 --> 00:50:18,945
[audience laughs]
2004
00:50:18,955 --> 00:50:25,752
& nbsp
2005
00:50:25,762 --> 00:50:29,052
Because you don't do it
looks like a bad person to me
2006
00:50:29,062 --> 00:50:29,054
& nbsp
2007
00:50:29,064 --> 00:50:31,089
My smile
2008
00:50:31,099 --> 00:50:31,091
& nbsp
2009
00:50:31,101 --> 00:50:32,556
It has been throwing people away for years.
2010
00:50:32,566 --> 00:50:32,558
& nbsp
2011
00:50:32,568 --> 00:50:34,759
You should have seen my first mugshot.
2012
00:50:34,769 --> 00:50:34,761
& nbsp
2013
00:50:34,771 --> 00:50:36,393
Looks like I won the lottery.
2014
00:50:36,403 --> 00:50:36,395
& nbsp
2015
00:50:36,405 --> 00:50:38,096
Can you be serious, for once?
2016
00:50:38,106 --> 00:50:38,098
& nbsp
2017
00:50:38,108 --> 00:50:40,697
[cellphone beeps]
2018
00:50:40,707 --> 00:50:40,699
& nbsp
2019
00:50:40,709 --> 00:50:41,934
I will take this
2020
00:50:41,944 --> 00:50:43,136
& nbsp
2021
00:50:43,146 --> 00:50:44,402
Hello.
2022
00:50:44,412 --> 00:50:44,404
& nbsp
2023
00:50:44,414 --> 00:50:45,536
Derek.
2024
00:50:45,546 --> 00:50:45,538
& nbsp
2025
00:50:45,548 --> 00:50:48,239
When Hashem gives you a gift,
2026
00:50:48,249 --> 00:50:48,241
& nbsp
2027
00:50:48,251 --> 00:50:49,840
You have to go with it.
2028
00:50:49,850 --> 00:50:49,842
& nbsp
2029
00:50:49,852 --> 00:50:53,277
So be prepared to curl up, throw
and start to get nervous,
2030
00:50:53,287 --> 00:50:53,279
& nbsp
2031
00:50:53,289 --> 00:50:54,911
Because you got the The Show
2032
00:50:54,921 --> 00:50:54,913
& nbsp
2033
00:50:54,923 --> 00:50:57,514
- Bob?
- Who else?
2034
00:50:57,524 --> 00:50:57,516
& nbsp
2035
00:50:57,526 --> 00:50:59,049
I don't know, anyone except Bob.
2036
00:50:59,059 --> 00:50:59,051
& nbsp
2037
00:50:59,061 --> 00:51:00,851
Bubbale, you get a show.
2038
00:51:00,861 --> 00:51:00,853
& nbsp
2039
00:51:00,863 --> 00:51:04,855
This is the key, I send them
videos and they like it.
2040
00:51:04,865 --> 00:51:04,857
& nbsp
2041
00:51:04,867 --> 00:51:05,922
We have dates.
2042
00:51:05,932 --> 00:51:05,924
& nbsp
2043
00:51:05,934 --> 00:51:08,458
Bob, you messed up my life, seriously.
2044
00:51:08,468 --> 00:51:08,460
& nbsp
2045
00:51:08,470 --> 00:51:10,594
This is a lifetime opportunity.
2046
00:51:10,604 --> 00:51:10,596
& nbsp
2047
00:51:10,606 --> 00:51:13,563
Comic careers are made
by performing Performances.
2048
00:51:13,573 --> 00:51:13,565
& nbsp
2049
00:51:13,575 --> 00:51:15,766
Look, I appreciate it, I really did it.
2050
00:51:15,776 --> 00:51:15,768
& nbsp
2051
00:51:15,778 --> 00:51:17,037
But I can't do it.
2052
00:51:17,047 --> 00:51:18,404
& nbsp
2053
00:51:18,414 --> 00:51:19,936
I will let the marinade.
2054
00:51:19,946 --> 00:51:19,938
& nbsp
2055
00:51:19,948 --> 00:51:21,038
Alright, marinate.
2056
00:51:21,048 --> 00:51:21,040
& nbsp
2057
00:51:21,050 --> 00:51:22,406
I can't do it.
I appreciate it
2058
00:51:22,416 --> 00:51:22,408
& nbsp
2059
00:51:22,418 --> 00:51:23,974
Listen, thank you, but, no thanks.
2060
00:51:23,984 --> 00:51:23,976
& nbsp
2061
00:51:23,986 --> 00:51:26,879
Good, I'll call you
tomorrow.
We will close the deal.
2062
00:51:26,889 --> 00:51:28,214
& nbsp
2063
00:51:28,224 --> 00:51:29,950
Hello, Hello
2064
00:51:29,960 --> 00:51:31,650
& nbsp
2065
00:51:31,660 --> 00:51:33,583
What did he say?
2066
00:51:33,593 --> 00:51:33,585
& nbsp
2067
00:51:33,595 --> 00:51:36,186
I said that
all in your head, bro.
2068
00:51:36,196 --> 00:51:36,188
& nbsp
2069
00:51:36,198 --> 00:51:39,623
I mean, why not try to find a girl who doesn't drive you crazy?
2070
00:51:39,633 --> 00:51:39,625
& nbsp
2071
00:51:39,635 --> 00:51:41,426
They are out there, you know.
2072
00:51:41,436 --> 00:51:41,428
& nbsp
2073
00:51:41,438 --> 00:51:44,594
[Sal] my intestine says that he is there
His hand is on another man now.
2074
00:51:44,604 --> 00:51:44,596
& nbsp
2075
00:51:44,606 --> 00:51:45,798
Both hands.
2076
00:51:45,808 --> 00:51:48,868
& nbsp
2077
00:51:48,878 --> 00:51:50,000
You only gel your hair?
2078
00:51:50,010 --> 00:51:50,002
& nbsp
2079
00:51:50,012 --> 00:51:51,902
I put a little spritz in it.
2080
00:51:51,912 --> 00:51:51,904
& nbsp
2081
00:51:51,914 --> 00:51:53,337
Try something new.
2082
00:51:53,347 --> 00:51:53,339
& nbsp
2083
00:51:53,349 --> 00:51:54,438
That's good.
2084
00:51:54,448 --> 00:51:54,440
& nbsp
2085
00:51:54,450 --> 00:51:56,175
- thank you
- [knock on the door]
2086
00:51:56,185 --> 00:51:57,310
& nbsp
2087
00:51:57,320 --> 00:51:59,713
Uh, this is this bad train accident.
2088
00:51:59,723 --> 00:52:06,118
& nbsp
2089
00:52:06,128 --> 00:52:08,652
How are you doing, Marshall?
2090
00:52:08,662 --> 00:52:08,654
& nbsp
2091
00:52:08,664 --> 00:52:13,123
I have a problem drinking and I have a crush on a South American prostitute.
2092
00:52:13,133 --> 00:52:13,125
& nbsp
2093
00:52:13,135 --> 00:52:14,727
What is my appearance?
2094
00:52:14,737 --> 00:52:16,362
& nbsp
2095
00:52:16,372 --> 00:52:17,798
Everything is there
2096
00:52:17,808 --> 00:52:21,433
& nbsp
2097
00:52:21,443 --> 00:52:24,570
Here it is, this is where
He spends most of his time.
2098
00:52:24,580 --> 00:52:26,572
& nbsp
2099
00:52:26,582 --> 00:52:28,739
How are you doing?
Sammy?
2100
00:52:28,749 --> 00:52:28,741
& nbsp
2101
00:52:28,751 --> 00:52:31,308
You know, I've been in this job for almost 20 years,
2102
00:52:31,318 --> 00:52:31,310
& nbsp
2103
00:52:31,320 --> 00:52:36,947
and I have never seen ingratiate
themselves in a community so fast.
2104
00:52:36,957 --> 00:52:36,949
& nbsp
2105
00:52:36,959 --> 00:52:39,083
The person finds the call.
2106
00:52:39,093 --> 00:52:39,085
& nbsp
2107
00:52:39,095 --> 00:52:40,418
Must give it to it, right?
2108
00:52:40,428 --> 00:52:40,420
& nbsp
2109
00:52:40,430 --> 00:52:41,985
We will give it to him, alright.
2110
00:52:41,995 --> 00:52:41,987
& nbsp
2111
00:52:41,997 --> 00:52:45,822
Yeah, well, he's close.
So
must be up fast enough.
2112
00:52:45,832 --> 00:52:45,824
& nbsp
2113
00:52:45,834 --> 00:52:47,458
Good.
2114
00:52:47,468 --> 00:52:47,460
& nbsp
2115
00:52:47,470 --> 00:52:50,328
We will give another
20 when the job is complete
2116
00:52:50,338 --> 00:52:50,330
& nbsp
2117
00:52:50,340 --> 00:52:52,566
Then I will see you soon.
2118
00:52:52,576 --> 00:52:59,371
& nbsp
2119
00:52:59,381 --> 00:53:00,907
[close the door]
2120
00:53:00,917 --> 00:53:03,076
& nbsp
2121
00:53:03,086 --> 00:53:06,344
Marshalls this big city is
always on the verge of something,
2122
00:53:06,354 --> 00:53:06,346
& nbsp
2123
00:53:06,356 --> 00:53:10,047
always on the verge of
corruption, I don't know
2124
00:53:10,057 --> 00:53:10,049
& nbsp
2125
00:53:10,059 --> 00:53:14,918
This is just confusion over a
crossword puzzle on a blind person on Tuesday.
2126
00:53:14,928 --> 00:53:14,920
& nbsp
2127
00:53:14,930 --> 00:53:15,987
- Achoo
- Bless you.
2128
00:53:15,997 --> 00:53:15,989
& nbsp
2129
00:53:15,999 --> 00:53:17,621
Thank you dear
Achoo.
2130
00:53:17,631 --> 00:53:17,623
& nbsp
2131
00:53:17,633 --> 00:53:19,023
- Bless you.
- Thank you, dear.
2132
00:53:19,033 --> 00:53:19,025
& nbsp
2133
00:53:19,035 --> 00:53:20,991
Well, why don't you check
Marshall notes?
2134
00:53:21,001 --> 00:53:20,993
& nbsp
2135
00:53:21,003 --> 00:53:24,362
You know, find out if he succeeded
calls to the New York area recently,
2136
00:53:24,372 --> 00:53:24,364
& nbsp
2137
00:53:24,374 --> 00:53:26,264
and if so, for whom.
2138
00:53:26,274 --> 00:53:26,266
& nbsp
2139
00:53:26,276 --> 00:53:27,965
That's a good idea.
2140
00:53:27,975 --> 00:53:27,967
& nbsp
2141
00:53:27,977 --> 00:53:30,801
I will do it myself but that's the case
A strong idea still, baby.
2142
00:53:30,811 --> 00:53:30,803
& nbsp
2143
00:53:30,813 --> 00:53:34,105
I'm just trying to help.
Right,
Rex?
Mother just wants to help.
2144
00:53:34,115 --> 00:53:34,107
& nbsp
2145
00:53:34,117 --> 00:53:35,306
Right.
2146
00:53:35,316 --> 00:53:35,308
& nbsp
2147
00:53:35,318 --> 00:53:37,440
Rex, did you brush
teeth this morning
2148
00:53:37,450 --> 00:53:37,442
& nbsp
2149
00:53:37,452 --> 00:53:40,079
No, I rest from the brush.
2150
00:53:40,089 --> 00:53:41,547
& nbsp
2151
00:53:41,557 --> 00:53:43,781
Need to take a break from the brush.
2152
00:53:43,791 --> 00:53:43,783
& nbsp
2153
00:53:43,793 --> 00:53:45,782
That Marshall is a real work, huh?
2154
00:53:45,792 --> 00:53:45,784
& nbsp
2155
00:53:45,794 --> 00:53:49,420
Yes, it looks like he has 20 years of bad luck.
2156
00:53:49,430 --> 00:53:49,422
& nbsp
2157
00:53:49,432 --> 00:53:51,825
Someone else will
see some bad luck today.
2158
00:53:51,835 --> 00:53:59,799
& nbsp
2159
00:53:59,809 --> 00:54:01,068
[door open]
2160
00:54:01,078 --> 00:54:04,871
& nbsp
2161
00:54:04,881 --> 00:54:06,270
Can I help you?
2162
00:54:06,280 --> 00:54:06,272
& nbsp
2163
00:54:06,282 --> 00:54:08,239
We are looking for our friends.
2164
00:54:08,249 --> 00:54:08,241
& nbsp
2165
00:54:08,251 --> 00:54:09,810
We heard he was inside.
2166
00:54:09,820 --> 00:54:15,080
& nbsp
2167
00:54:15,090 --> 00:54:16,849
Only friends here are mine.
2168
00:54:16,859 --> 00:54:20,152
& nbsp
2169
00:54:20,162 --> 00:54:21,985
Back up, Earl.
2170
00:54:21,995 --> 00:54:21,987
& nbsp
2171
00:54:21,997 --> 00:54:25,989
Yeah, I'll be back, but I
here if you need me
2172
00:54:25,999 --> 00:54:25,991
& nbsp
2173
00:54:26,001 --> 00:54:27,791
I am a drinker, boy.
2174
00:54:27,801 --> 00:54:27,793
& nbsp
2175
00:54:27,803 --> 00:54:31,795
I do nonsense during the day.
2176
00:54:31,805 --> 00:54:31,797
& nbsp
2177
00:54:31,807 --> 00:54:33,099
Let's Dance.
2178
00:54:33,109 --> 00:54:35,667
& nbsp
2179
00:54:35,677 --> 00:54:37,668
No, where is he?
2180
00:54:37,678 --> 00:54:37,670
& nbsp
2181
00:54:37,680 --> 00:54:39,436
I feel your confidence
2182
00:54:39,446 --> 00:54:39,438
& nbsp
2183
00:54:39,448 --> 00:54:40,841
of your panting chest
2184
00:54:40,851 --> 00:54:42,375
& nbsp
2185
00:54:42,385 --> 00:54:44,211
and your beautiful hair
2186
00:54:44,221 --> 00:54:45,310
& nbsp
2187
00:54:45,320 --> 00:54:47,377
But we don't know your friends.
2188
00:54:47,387 --> 00:54:47,379
& nbsp
2189
00:54:47,389 --> 00:54:49,513
We don't make new friends.
2190
00:54:49,523 --> 00:54:49,515
& nbsp
2191
00:54:49,525 --> 00:54:51,348
The long list is closed.
2192
00:54:51,358 --> 00:54:51,350
& nbsp
2193
00:54:51,360 --> 00:54:53,384
Yes.
2194
00:54:53,394 --> 00:54:53,386
& nbsp
2195
00:54:53,396 --> 00:54:55,886
Maybe this will help.
2196
00:54:55,896 --> 00:54:55,888
& nbsp
2197
00:54:55,898 --> 00:54:58,225
Oh no.
2198
00:54:58,235 --> 00:55:06,466
& nbsp
2199
00:55:06,476 --> 00:55:08,933
You can check inside if you want.
2200
00:55:08,943 --> 00:55:08,935
& nbsp
2201
00:55:08,945 --> 00:55:10,203
Go ahead.
2202
00:55:10,213 --> 00:55:14,473
& nbsp
2203
00:55:14,483 --> 00:55:17,040
You have a big taste in hair.
2204
00:55:17,050 --> 00:55:17,042
& nbsp
2205
00:55:17,052 --> 00:55:18,244
But this isn't over yet.
2206
00:55:18,254 --> 00:55:20,045
& nbsp
2207
00:55:20,055 --> 00:55:21,347
Let's go.
2208
00:55:21,357 --> 00:55:24,484
& nbsp
2209
00:55:24,494 --> 00:55:26,650
Bad people send us
directly to the clubhouse
2210
00:55:26,660 --> 00:55:26,652
& nbsp
2211
00:55:26,662 --> 00:55:29,819
Time to pay a visit to Marshall.
2212
00:55:29,829 --> 00:55:29,821
& nbsp
2213
00:55:29,831 --> 00:55:32,355
We can stay here if you need us.
2214
00:55:32,365 --> 00:55:32,357
& nbsp
2215
00:55:32,367 --> 00:55:35,960
I don't really like sleeping parties
with dudes and I don't bring my pajamas,
2216
00:55:35,970 --> 00:55:35,962
& nbsp
2217
00:55:35,972 --> 00:55:38,929
but I can see you very, very scared.
2218
00:55:38,939 --> 00:55:38,931
& nbsp
2219
00:55:38,941 --> 00:55:42,732
I guess the rifle and the ax vibrate
I will take a moment.
2220
00:55:42,742 --> 00:55:42,734
& nbsp
2221
00:55:42,744 --> 00:55:44,467
How did they find me?
2222
00:55:44,477 --> 00:55:44,469
& nbsp
2223
00:55:44,479 --> 00:55:46,170
I am in Wisconsin.
2224
00:55:46,180 --> 00:55:46,172
& nbsp
2225
00:55:46,182 --> 00:55:47,871
Hmm.
2226
00:55:47,881 --> 00:55:47,873
& nbsp
2227
00:55:47,883 --> 00:55:51,474
- Most specifically considering your tiny petite.
- I'm 5'7 "
2228
00:55:51,484 --> 00:55:51,476
& nbsp
2229
00:55:51,486 --> 00:55:53,543
I think it's a bit of a lie.
2230
00:55:53,553 --> 00:55:53,545
& nbsp
2231
00:55:53,555 --> 00:55:54,712
5 '6 and half.
2232
00:55:54,722 --> 00:55:54,714
& nbsp
2233
00:55:54,724 --> 00:55:57,581
I think you are still lying to yourself.
2234
00:55:57,591 --> 00:55:57,583
& nbsp
2235
00:55:57,593 --> 00:55:58,915
5'6 ", honest.
2236
00:55:58,925 --> 00:55:58,917
& nbsp
2237
00:55:58,927 --> 00:56:00,451
Leave it alone.
2238
00:56:00,461 --> 00:56:00,453
& nbsp
2239
00:56:00,463 --> 00:56:01,552
Maybe like 5'4".
2240
00:56:01,562 --> 00:56:01,554
& nbsp
2241
00:56:01,564 --> 00:56:03,290
And you all through the internet.
2242
00:56:03,300 --> 00:56:06,592
& nbsp
2243
00:56:06,602 --> 00:56:08,159
[man on radio] Hey,
this is Mike Stevens,
2244
00:56:08,169 --> 00:56:08,161
& nbsp
2245
00:56:08,171 --> 00:56:11,261
welcome back to 106.5 WKTU.
2246
00:56:11,271 --> 00:56:11,263
& nbsp
2247
00:56:11,273 --> 00:56:12,962
Some local gossip news here,
2248
00:56:12,972 --> 00:56:12,964
& nbsp
2249
00:56:12,974 --> 00:56:16,232
we hear local comedians and
internet sensations, Derek Hesh
2250
00:56:16,242 --> 00:56:16,234
& nbsp
2251
00:56:16,244 --> 00:56:19,069
will announce that he
goes to Ian Cams' window.
2252
00:56:19,079 --> 00:56:19,071
& nbsp
2253
00:56:19,081 --> 00:56:21,505
Everything will go down tonight
in Corner Parks.
2254
00:56:21,515 --> 00:56:21,507
& nbsp
2255
00:56:21,517 --> 00:56:23,107
Looking forward to winning tickets this week
2256
00:56:23,117 --> 00:56:23,109
& nbsp
2257
00:56:23,119 --> 00:56:27,080
and only shoot two
hours in Grand Rapids.
2258
00:56:27,090 --> 00:56:31,317
& nbsp
2259
00:56:31,327 --> 00:56:36,156
I tried eating pussy puppets
and I splashed on my teeth.
2260
00:56:36,166 --> 00:56:39,058
& nbsp
2261
00:56:39,068 --> 00:56:41,592
[ventriloquist] All right,
That is enough, we have to go.
2262
00:56:41,602 --> 00:56:41,594
& nbsp
2263
00:56:41,604 --> 00:56:43,494
Good.
2264
00:56:43,504 --> 00:56:43,496
& nbsp
2265
00:56:43,506 --> 00:56:46,362
Destroyed pussy and my night.
2266
00:56:46,372 --> 00:56:46,364
& nbsp
2267
00:56:46,374 --> 00:56:51,168
Let's go there so you can
all feel bad about our lives.
2268
00:56:51,178 --> 00:56:51,170
& nbsp
2269
00:56:51,180 --> 00:56:53,103
That's a good idea.
2270
00:56:53,113 --> 00:56:53,105
& nbsp
2271
00:56:53,115 --> 00:56:54,371
Women and men,
2272
00:56:54,381 --> 00:56:54,373
& nbsp
2273
00:56:54,383 --> 00:56:56,906
responsible person
The success of this place,
2274
00:56:56,916 --> 00:56:56,908
& nbsp
2275
00:56:56,918 --> 00:57:00,179
and he did The Show, Derek Hesh.
2276
00:57:00,189 --> 00:57:10,089
& nbsp
2277
00:57:10,099 --> 00:57:11,825
What
Oh!
2278
00:57:11,835 --> 00:57:24,002
& nbsp
2279
00:57:24,012 --> 00:57:27,737
You know, the first time I came
Here, I don't know what I'm doing.
2280
00:57:27,747 --> 00:57:27,739
& nbsp
2281
00:57:30,416 --> 00:57:30,408
& nbsp
2282
00:57:30,418 --> 00:57:32,743
and you laugh.
2283
00:57:32,753 --> 00:57:32,745
& nbsp
2284
00:57:32,755 --> 00:57:34,847
And that makes me feel really good.
2285
00:57:34,857 --> 00:57:37,650
& nbsp
2286
00:57:37,660 --> 00:57:39,152
But unfortunately,
2287
00:57:39,162 --> 00:57:41,219
& nbsp
2288
00:57:41,229 --> 00:57:42,521
this is the end for me
2289
00:57:42,531 --> 00:57:45,290
& nbsp
2290
00:57:45,300 --> 00:57:46,859
I can't do Performances.
2291
00:57:46,869 --> 00:57:49,328
& nbsp
2292
00:57:49,338 --> 00:57:51,497
Derek Hesh isn't even my name.
2293
00:57:51,507 --> 00:57:53,031
& nbsp
2294
00:57:53,041 --> 00:57:55,367
Derek Hesh is his name
the government gave me
2295
00:57:55,377 --> 00:58:01,274
& nbsp
2296
00:58:01,284 --> 00:58:03,343
My name is Sammy Legucci.
2297
00:58:03,353 --> 00:58:05,812
& nbsp
2298
00:58:05,822 --> 00:58:08,712
I am a little gangster from Brooklyn
2299
00:58:08,722 --> 00:58:08,714
& nbsp
2300
00:58:08,724 --> 00:58:11,350
and I decided to testify
against my best friends
2301
00:58:11,360 --> 00:58:12,752
& nbsp
2302
00:58:12,762 --> 00:58:15,588
The government puts me here
so they can protect me.
2303
00:58:15,598 --> 00:58:16,688
& nbsp
2304
00:58:16,698 --> 00:58:19,355
They don't really do a good job.
2305
00:58:19,365 --> 00:58:19,357
& nbsp
2306
00:58:19,367 --> 00:58:21,324
You don't know these people.
2307
00:58:21,334 --> 00:58:21,326
& nbsp
2308
00:58:21,336 --> 00:58:23,427
Wait here, excuse me.
2309
00:58:23,437 --> 00:58:23,429
& nbsp
2310
00:58:23,439 --> 00:58:25,663
Wait a minute, excuse me.
2311
00:58:25,673 --> 00:58:25,665
& nbsp
2312
00:58:25,675 --> 00:58:29,833
Excuse me, Derek or Sammy
or whatever your name is,
2313
00:58:29,843 --> 00:58:29,835
& nbsp
2314
00:58:29,845 --> 00:58:32,369
can you just sit
I have something to say.
2315
00:58:32,379 --> 00:58:32,371
& nbsp
2316
00:58:32,381 --> 00:58:33,873
Sit down.
2317
00:58:33,883 --> 00:58:36,609
& nbsp
2318
00:58:36,619 --> 00:58:39,643
You wake people in this city.
2319
00:58:39,653 --> 00:58:39,645
& nbsp
2320
00:58:39,655 --> 00:58:41,511
I lost my wife,
2321
00:58:41,521 --> 00:58:41,513
& nbsp
2322
00:58:41,523 --> 00:58:43,647
love in my life,
2323
00:58:43,657 --> 00:58:43,649
& nbsp
2324
00:58:43,659 --> 00:58:45,617
That woman means everything to me.
2325
00:58:45,627 --> 00:58:47,185
& nbsp
2326
00:58:47,195 --> 00:58:49,021
Sure, I lost him
2327
00:58:49,031 --> 00:58:50,089
& nbsp
2328
00:58:50,099 --> 00:58:51,755
a few blocks away
2329
00:58:51,765 --> 00:58:51,757
& nbsp
2330
00:58:51,767 --> 00:58:53,857
to scratch berry farmers.
2331
00:58:53,867 --> 00:58:53,859
& nbsp
2332
00:58:53,869 --> 00:58:56,360
What is this?
2333
00:58:56,370 --> 00:58:56,362
& nbsp
2334
00:58:56,372 --> 00:58:57,895
The point is,
2335
00:58:57,905 --> 00:58:57,897
& nbsp
2336
00:58:57,907 --> 00:59:00,630
You give me a way out.
2337
00:59:00,640 --> 00:59:00,632
& nbsp
2338
00:59:00,642 --> 00:59:02,232
So, thank you
2339
00:59:02,242 --> 00:59:02,234
& nbsp
2340
00:59:02,244 --> 00:59:03,433
[Clint] me too
2341
00:59:03,443 --> 00:59:03,435
& nbsp
2342
00:59:03,445 --> 00:59:04,701
Dirt.
2343
00:59:04,711 --> 00:59:04,703
& nbsp
2344
00:59:04,713 --> 00:59:06,372
I'm famous for you, bro.
2345
00:59:06,382 --> 00:59:14,413
& nbsp
2346
00:59:16,890 --> 00:59:16,882
& nbsp
2347
00:59:16,892 --> 00:59:18,616
and
2348
00:59:18,626 --> 00:59:18,618
& nbsp
2349
00:59:18,628 --> 00:59:22,585
Most of you people fucking know me because
you might drive me home when I'm drunk.
2350
00:59:22,595 --> 00:59:22,587
& nbsp
2351
00:59:22,597 --> 00:59:25,456
But, guess what, it's not me now.
2352
00:59:25,466 --> 00:59:25,458
& nbsp
2353
00:59:25,468 --> 00:59:27,590
Good?
2354
00:59:27,600 --> 00:59:27,592
& nbsp
2355
00:59:27,602 --> 00:59:29,262
I saw the video
2356
00:59:29,272 --> 00:59:31,029
& nbsp
2357
00:59:31,039 --> 00:59:35,001
and I see the anger that made me
The best of me and I cried.
2358
00:59:35,011 --> 00:59:38,337
& nbsp
2359
00:59:38,347 --> 00:59:39,770
I cry.
2360
00:59:39,780 --> 00:59:39,772
& nbsp
2361
00:59:39,782 --> 00:59:41,471
For the first time in my life.
2362
00:59:41,481 --> 00:59:41,473
& nbsp
2363
00:59:41,483 --> 00:59:43,172
And I do not know what you're...
2364
00:59:43,182 --> 00:59:43,174
& nbsp
2365
00:59:43,184 --> 00:59:46,509
If you damn people know what 35
years of hidden tears look like,
2366
00:59:46,519 --> 00:59:46,511
& nbsp
2367
00:59:46,521 --> 00:59:48,080
I will tell you.
2368
00:59:48,090 --> 00:59:49,949
& nbsp
2369
00:59:49,959 --> 00:59:52,352
It's like my eyes
go to the bathroom
2370
00:59:52,362 --> 00:59:53,853
& nbsp
2371
00:59:53,863 --> 00:59:56,619
Every eye, individually,
just fucking peeing
2372
00:59:56,629 --> 00:59:56,621
& nbsp
2373
00:59:56,631 --> 00:59:57,855
Fuck...
2374
00:59:57,865 --> 00:59:57,857
& nbsp
2375
00:59:57,867 --> 00:59:59,822
One time in third grade,
a poor young man
2376
00:59:59,832 --> 00:59:59,824
& nbsp
2377
00:59:59,834 --> 01:00:03,460
makes expensive call errors
I am stupid when I am speaking,
2378
01:00:03,470 --> 01:00:03,462
& nbsp
2379
01:00:03,472 --> 01:00:06,366
So, I chewed his nose
and pushed him off the bridge.
2380
01:00:06,376 --> 01:00:07,799
& nbsp
2381
01:00:07,809 --> 01:00:09,368
I take care of that.
2382
01:00:09,378 --> 01:00:10,703
& nbsp
2383
01:00:10,713 --> 01:00:12,272
But I digress.
2384
01:00:12,282 --> 01:00:13,940
& nbsp
2385
01:00:13,950 --> 01:00:17,074
You know, I never
see my sister so happy
2386
01:00:17,084 --> 01:00:17,076
& nbsp
2387
01:00:17,086 --> 01:00:20,911
It used to see it bad
relationship after a bad relationship
2388
01:00:20,921 --> 01:00:20,913
& nbsp
2389
01:00:20,923 --> 01:00:22,715
after a bad relationship
2390
01:00:22,725 --> 01:00:23,882
& nbsp
2391
01:00:23,892 --> 01:00:26,016
Usually have to enter
2392
01:00:26,026 --> 01:00:26,018
& nbsp
2393
01:00:26,028 --> 01:00:27,486
and hit people very hard.
2394
01:00:27,496 --> 01:00:29,355
& nbsp
2395
01:00:29,365 --> 01:00:31,755
So I don't really care what your real name is,
2396
01:00:31,765 --> 01:00:31,757
& nbsp
2397
01:00:31,767 --> 01:00:33,326
or what you did in your past,
2398
01:00:33,336 --> 01:00:34,527
& nbsp
2399
01:00:34,537 --> 01:00:36,129
or even how high you are.
2400
01:00:36,139 --> 01:00:37,295
& nbsp
2401
01:00:37,305 --> 01:00:38,761
I only know that
2402
01:00:38,771 --> 01:00:38,763
& nbsp
2403
01:00:38,773 --> 01:00:40,998
You make it really happy
2404
01:00:41,008 --> 01:00:41,000
& nbsp
2405
01:00:41,010 --> 01:00:45,835
And, um, he's happy
means a lot to me, so...
2406
01:00:45,845 --> 01:00:45,837
& nbsp
2407
01:00:45,847 --> 01:00:50,406
So I say if you want to go do The
Show then just go.
2408
01:00:50,416 --> 01:00:50,408
& nbsp
2409
01:00:50,418 --> 01:00:52,275
Iron Badgers is back.
2410
01:00:52,285 --> 01:00:52,277
& nbsp
2411
01:00:52,287 --> 01:00:54,379
[cheering]
2412
01:00:54,389 --> 01:01:03,388
& nbsp
2413
01:01:03,398 --> 01:01:05,190
Let's do it.
2414
01:01:05,200 --> 01:01:07,893
& nbsp
2415
01:01:07,903 --> 01:01:09,692
Do you like Italian food?
2416
01:01:09,702 --> 01:01:09,694
& nbsp
2417
01:01:09,704 --> 01:01:12,429
I like Italian food, I go to Italy
restaurants in this city, amazing.
2418
01:01:12,439 --> 01:01:12,431
& nbsp
2419
01:01:12,441 --> 01:01:13,931
I entered,
2420
01:01:13,941 --> 01:01:13,933
& nbsp
2421
01:01:13,943 --> 01:01:15,933
The waiter came, he gave me a menu.
2422
01:01:15,943 --> 01:01:15,935
& nbsp
2423
01:01:15,945 --> 01:01:18,335
I like, "Excuse me, what about
Is the paste here?"
2424
01:01:18,345 --> 01:01:18,337
& nbsp
2425
01:01:18,347 --> 01:01:19,770
He goes, "This is $ 21."
2426
01:01:19,780 --> 01:01:19,772
& nbsp
2427
01:01:19,782 --> 01:01:21,572
I go,
2428
01:01:21,582 --> 01:01:21,574
& nbsp
2429
01:01:21,584 --> 01:01:23,273
"Who asks, what?"
2430
01:01:23,283 --> 01:01:23,275
& nbsp
2431
01:01:23,285 --> 01:01:25,708
He is like, "I don't know,
No one ordered it, the price is $ 21."
2432
01:01:25,718 --> 01:01:25,710
& nbsp
2433
01:01:25,720 --> 01:01:26,976
The difference is, where do I come from,
2434
01:01:26,986 --> 01:01:26,978
& nbsp
2435
01:01:26,988 --> 01:01:29,045
You go to Italy
restaurant for an experience.
2436
01:01:29,055 --> 01:01:29,047
& nbsp
2437
01:01:29,057 --> 01:01:30,647
This is a real experience, you enter,
2438
01:01:30,657 --> 01:01:30,649
& nbsp
2439
01:01:30,659 --> 01:01:32,949
a man named Joey walked over,
he was like, "how are you doing?"
2440
01:01:32,959 --> 01:01:32,951
& nbsp
2441
01:01:32,961 --> 01:01:36,552
are you good? "," Good, I'm good. "
" Yeah, sit down, what, are you hungry? "
2442
01:01:36,562 --> 01:01:36,554
& nbsp
2443
01:01:36,564 --> 01:01:38,522
" Yes, I'm thinking
Maybe we'll have pasta. "
2444
01:01:38,532 --> 01:01:38,524
& nbsp
2445
01:01:38,534 --> 01:01:40,690
" Do you want pasta? Frankie!
2446
01:01:40,700 --> 01:01:40,692
& nbsp
2447
01:01:40,702 --> 01:01:42,726
Let's persuade this person to some meatballs,
2448
01:01:42,736 --> 01:01:42,728
& nbsp
2449
01:01:42,738 --> 01:01:45,061
let's get him some penne, let's find
some spaghetti, let's find pasta.
2450
01:01:45,071 --> 01:01:45,063
& nbsp
2451
01:01:45,073 --> 01:01:46,429
What do you drink
2452
01:01:46,439 --> 01:01:46,431
& nbsp
2453
01:01:46,441 --> 01:01:48,398
"Maybe a glass of wine."
"Give him a bottle of wine."
2454
01:01:48,408 --> 01:01:48,400
& nbsp
2455
01:01:48,410 --> 01:01:50,634
I'm eating, I'm drinking, that's the best experience of my life,
2456
01:01:50,644 --> 01:01:50,636
& nbsp
2457
01:01:50,646 --> 01:01:53,603
then I ask him the bill.
Guy left,
"Bill? We don't have a bill here.
2458
01:01:53,613 --> 01:01:53,605
& nbsp
2459
01:01:53,615 --> 01:01:56,508
I mean, what do you have?"
"There are some pasta, some wine."
2460
01:01:56,518 --> 01:01:57,676
& nbsp
2461
01:01:57,686 --> 01:01:59,009
"Give me $ 300, we're good."
2462
01:01:59,019 --> 01:01:59,011
& nbsp
2463
01:01:59,021 --> 01:02:01,878
$ 300, can't be trusted
2464
01:02:01,888 --> 01:02:01,880
& nbsp
2465
01:02:01,890 --> 01:02:04,114
Do you like Jewish jokes?
2466
01:02:04,124 --> 01:02:04,116
& nbsp
2467
01:02:04,126 --> 01:02:06,449
Anyone who wants to hear Jewish jokes?
2468
01:02:06,459 --> 01:02:06,451
& nbsp
2469
01:02:06,461 --> 01:02:09,685
One day, outside the church,
There are two people standing there.
2470
01:02:09,695 --> 01:02:09,687
& nbsp
2471
01:02:09,697 --> 01:02:12,956
One person holding the sign
said, "I am a Jew, please help."
2472
01:02:12,966 --> 01:02:12,958
& nbsp
2473
01:02:12,968 --> 01:02:16,960
Right next to him, there is another boy
standing up, saying, "I'm Catholic, please help."
2474
01:02:16,970 --> 01:02:16,962
& nbsp
2475
01:02:16,972 --> 01:02:19,663
People leave the church,
they see these two people,
2476
01:02:19,673 --> 01:02:19,665
& nbsp
2477
01:02:19,675 --> 01:02:23,032
everyone walks toward Catholicism,
Obviously, it's outside the church,
2478
01:02:23,042 --> 01:02:23,034
& nbsp
2479
01:02:23,044 --> 01:02:24,368
start giving him money
2480
01:02:24,378 --> 01:02:24,370
& nbsp
2481
01:02:24,380 --> 01:02:26,002
This lasts for weeks.
2482
01:02:26,012 --> 01:02:26,004
& nbsp
2483
01:02:26,014 --> 01:02:28,505
More often, they see this man
holding the sign, which says, "I'm Jewish",
2484
01:02:28,515 --> 01:02:28,507
& nbsp
2485
01:02:28,517 --> 01:02:31,641
They go to Catholics, they
Give him more money, more money.
2486
01:02:31,651 --> 01:02:31,643
& nbsp
2487
01:02:31,653 --> 01:02:33,076
One day the pastor came out.
2488
01:02:33,086 --> 01:02:33,078
& nbsp
2489
01:02:33,088 --> 01:02:35,378
Walk to people with
marks, "I'm Jewish",
2490
01:02:35,388 --> 01:02:35,380
& nbsp
2491
01:02:35,390 --> 01:02:37,181
say, "Listen, I'll help you out,
2492
01:02:37,191 --> 01:02:37,183
& nbsp
2493
01:02:37,193 --> 01:02:39,215
You know, there is a
synagogue in the block,
2494
01:02:39,225 --> 01:02:39,217
& nbsp
2495
01:02:39,227 --> 01:02:41,018
I think if you stand there,
you will produce more money,
2496
01:02:41,028 --> 01:02:41,020
& nbsp
2497
01:02:41,030 --> 01:02:44,087
You clearly see people giving money
to men with the sign "Catholic".
2498
01:02:44,097 --> 01:02:44,089
& nbsp
2499
01:02:44,099 --> 01:02:47,690
The man looks at the priest, then looks at him
the man with the "Catholic" sign and goes,
2500
01:02:47,700 --> 01:02:47,692
& nbsp
2501
01:02:47,702 --> 01:02:50,393
"Jaco, they try
teach us how to make money."
2502
01:02:50,403 --> 01:02:50,395
& nbsp
2503
01:02:50,405 --> 01:02:52,061
[audience laughs]
2504
01:02:52,071 --> 01:02:52,063
& nbsp
2505
01:02:52,073 --> 01:02:53,800
Jews, they are the best.
2506
01:02:53,810 --> 01:02:55,500
& nbsp
2507
01:02:55,510 --> 01:02:58,235
I'm sure I'm fine, just let it go
I talked to him for a while.
2508
01:02:58,245 --> 01:02:58,237
& nbsp
2509
01:02:58,247 --> 01:03:02,371
[Maria] For what?
...What for?
Sammy?
2510
01:03:02,381 --> 01:03:02,373
& nbsp
2511
01:03:02,383 --> 01:03:06,275
Look, I just want
to hear his voice, okay
2512
01:03:06,285 --> 01:03:06,277
& nbsp
2513
01:03:06,287 --> 01:03:08,878
God forbids, something happens,
I just want to hear his voice.
2514
01:03:08,888 --> 01:03:08,880
& nbsp
2515
01:03:08,890 --> 01:03:12,049
Please put him on the phone, Maria, only one second?
2516
01:03:12,061 --> 01:03:14,183
All right, Sammy.
2517
01:03:14,193 --> 01:03:14,185
& nbsp
2518
01:03:14,195 --> 01:03:16,552
Don't let him fall.
2519
01:03:16,562 --> 01:03:16,554
& nbsp
2520
01:03:16,564 --> 01:03:17,823
We will watch.
2521
01:03:17,833 --> 01:03:19,859
& nbsp
2522
01:03:19,869 --> 01:03:22,025
Nothing will happen to you.
2523
01:03:22,035 --> 01:03:22,027
& nbsp
2524
01:03:22,037 --> 01:03:23,562
Good?
There is no.
2525
01:03:23,572 --> 01:03:28,333
& nbsp
2526
01:03:28,343 --> 01:03:30,366
You have never been in trouble,
2527
01:03:30,376 --> 01:03:30,368
& nbsp
2528
01:03:30,378 --> 01:03:33,503
this redneck won't be there
pull the trigger on you
2529
01:03:33,513 --> 01:03:33,505
& nbsp
2530
01:03:33,515 --> 01:03:35,038
We know that.
2531
01:03:35,048 --> 01:03:35,040
& nbsp
2532
01:03:35,050 --> 01:03:37,674
We just want to thank you
for making us close
2533
01:03:37,684 --> 01:03:37,676
& nbsp
2534
01:03:37,686 --> 01:03:38,808
Seriously.
2535
01:03:38,818 --> 01:03:38,810
& nbsp
2536
01:03:38,820 --> 01:03:40,777
You will get the rest of your money.
2537
01:03:40,787 --> 01:03:40,779
& nbsp
2538
01:03:40,789 --> 01:03:42,779
Well, that's very appreciated.
2539
01:03:42,789 --> 01:03:42,781
& nbsp
2540
01:03:42,791 --> 01:03:45,184
My prostitutes make me undergo couples therapy.
2541
01:03:45,194 --> 01:03:46,351
& nbsp
2542
01:03:46,361 --> 01:03:47,484
Whatever.
2543
01:03:47,494 --> 01:03:47,486
& nbsp
2544
01:03:47,496 --> 01:03:49,286
You can get us
fucking killed out there
2545
01:03:49,296 --> 01:03:49,288
& nbsp
2546
01:03:49,298 --> 01:03:51,221
Killed?
What?
Will you relax
2547
01:03:51,231 --> 01:03:51,223
& nbsp
2548
01:03:51,233 --> 01:03:53,156
No one was killed on my watch.
2549
01:03:53,166 --> 01:03:53,158
& nbsp
2550
01:03:53,168 --> 01:03:55,391
I've been doing this for 23 years...
2551
01:03:55,401 --> 01:03:55,393
& nbsp
2552
01:03:55,403 --> 01:03:56,461
Enough.
2553
01:03:56,471 --> 01:03:59,230
& nbsp
2554
01:03:59,240 --> 01:04:01,767
No wonder this person pays
for the vagina, won't shut up.
2555
01:04:01,777 --> 01:04:03,301
& nbsp
2556
01:04:03,311 --> 01:04:05,168
What the hell, Sal?
In the car?
2557
01:04:05,178 --> 01:04:05,170
& nbsp
2558
01:04:05,180 --> 01:04:07,804
Sorry, I will clean it.
2559
01:04:07,814 --> 01:04:07,806
& nbsp
2560
01:04:07,816 --> 01:04:09,072
I'm on the edge.
2561
01:04:09,082 --> 01:04:09,074
& nbsp
2562
01:04:09,084 --> 01:04:10,940
Lorie hasn't responded in 13 hours,
2563
01:04:10,950 --> 01:04:10,942
& nbsp
2564
01:04:10,952 --> 01:04:14,744
except for two or three Ks and
"Of course, I still like you."
2565
01:04:14,754 --> 01:04:14,746
& nbsp
2566
01:04:14,756 --> 01:04:17,181
I mean, I'm really,
2567
01:04:17,191 --> 01:04:17,183
& nbsp
2568
01:04:17,193 --> 01:04:19,049
lose my mind at this time
2569
01:04:19,059 --> 01:04:19,051
& nbsp
2570
01:04:19,061 --> 01:04:21,752
[Dom] Sal, you killed a US Marshall, bro...
2571
01:04:21,762 --> 01:04:21,754
& nbsp
2572
01:04:21,764 --> 01:04:25,154
[Sal] Dude, he has
three new people like on the page,
2573
01:04:25,164 --> 01:04:25,156
& nbsp
2574
01:04:25,166 --> 01:04:27,824
from people I've never seen before.
2575
01:04:27,834 --> 01:04:27,826
& nbsp
2576
01:04:27,836 --> 01:04:30,560
- [Dom] you are not stable
- [Sal] you tell me
2577
01:04:30,570 --> 01:04:30,562
& nbsp
2578
01:04:30,572 --> 01:04:33,630
He put two pictures
from himself in underwear.
2579
01:04:33,640 --> 01:04:33,632
& nbsp
2580
01:04:33,642 --> 01:04:35,465
I mean, what's the matter?
2581
01:04:35,475 --> 01:04:35,467
& nbsp
2582
01:04:35,477 --> 01:04:37,467
[Dom] Are you a woman posting
lingerie pictures on Facebook?
2583
01:04:37,477 --> 01:04:37,469
& nbsp
2584
01:04:37,479 --> 01:04:39,536
[Sal] Yes, he said, if
I can model, so does he.
2585
01:04:39,546 --> 01:04:39,538
& nbsp
2586
01:04:39,548 --> 01:04:41,003
[Dom] But you are not even a damn model.
2587
01:04:41,013 --> 01:04:41,005
& nbsp
2588
01:04:41,015 --> 01:04:43,340
[Sal] Come on, man,
Where is the support?
2589
01:04:43,350 --> 01:04:43,342
& nbsp
2590
01:04:43,352 --> 01:04:44,407
I'm working on my display book.
2591
01:04:44,417 --> 01:04:44,409
& nbsp
2592
01:04:44,419 --> 01:04:46,743
[Dom] Oh, shut up, come on.
2593
01:04:46,753 --> 01:04:46,745
& nbsp
2594
01:04:46,755 --> 01:04:48,878
Oh my God, this is a bad bastard.
2595
01:04:48,888 --> 01:04:48,880
& nbsp
2596
01:04:48,890 --> 01:04:50,349
Oh my God.
2597
01:04:50,359 --> 01:04:54,053
& nbsp
2598
01:04:54,063 --> 01:04:56,219
I am a Special Agent Nicholas.
Can we talk?
2599
01:04:56,229 --> 01:04:56,221
& nbsp
2600
01:04:56,231 --> 01:04:58,522
And do you think Marshall
calls a shot?
2601
01:04:58,532 --> 01:04:58,524
& nbsp
2602
01:04:58,534 --> 01:05:01,891
Yes, I did.
He is sleepy
disposition about him
2603
01:05:01,901 --> 01:05:01,893
& nbsp
2604
01:05:01,903 --> 01:05:05,462
And I've worked from the intestine
instincts and cornbread for 20 years.
2605
01:05:05,472 --> 01:05:05,464
& nbsp
2606
01:05:05,474 --> 01:05:09,098
Okay, I got a strong feeling
rather than redneck with a pale wife.
2607
01:05:09,108 --> 01:05:09,100
& nbsp
2608
01:05:09,110 --> 01:05:10,933
Look, this is a serious accusation, Colin.
2609
01:05:10,943 --> 01:05:10,935
& nbsp
2610
01:05:10,945 --> 01:05:12,569
Do those words come out of your mouth?
2611
01:05:12,579 --> 01:05:12,571
& nbsp
2612
01:05:12,581 --> 01:05:16,038
Nothing has been corrupted
Marshall connection since 1977.
2613
01:05:16,048 --> 01:05:16,040
& nbsp
2614
01:05:16,050 --> 01:05:17,907
I understand.
2615
01:05:17,917 --> 01:05:17,909
& nbsp
2616
01:05:17,919 --> 01:05:21,143
I understand but I'm more confident than a week
old toast in the cougar kitchen.
2617
01:05:21,153 --> 01:05:21,145
& nbsp
2618
01:05:21,155 --> 01:05:22,913
Look, my husband has a gift.
2619
01:05:22,923 --> 01:05:22,915
& nbsp
2620
01:05:22,925 --> 01:05:25,514
He said that he thought that I
daddy deceived my mother,
2621
01:05:25,524 --> 01:05:25,516
& nbsp
2622
01:05:25,526 --> 01:05:27,750
Two weeks later, they filed for divorce.
2623
01:05:27,760 --> 01:05:27,752
& nbsp
2624
01:05:27,762 --> 01:05:28,719
Daddy has a lover.
2625
01:05:28,729 --> 01:05:28,721
& nbsp
2626
01:05:28,731 --> 01:05:29,453
Mm-hmm.
2627
01:05:29,463 --> 01:05:29,455
& nbsp
2628
01:05:29,465 --> 01:05:30,853
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
2629
01:05:30,863 --> 01:05:30,855
& nbsp
2630
01:05:30,865 --> 01:05:32,889
Do you know other women or?
2631
01:05:32,899 --> 01:05:32,891
& nbsp
2632
01:05:32,901 --> 01:05:36,426
A woman?
No, he left him for the age of 26
years of firefighter named Brick.
2633
01:05:36,436 --> 01:05:36,428
& nbsp
2634
01:05:36,438 --> 01:05:39,395
- Big bastard
- Oh yeah.
2635
01:05:39,405 --> 01:05:39,397
& nbsp
2636
01:05:39,407 --> 01:05:40,596
Then I'll call.
2637
01:05:40,606 --> 01:05:40,598
& nbsp
2638
01:05:40,608 --> 01:05:42,766
Humans don't ask you
a Walker Texas, buddy.
2639
01:05:42,776 --> 01:05:42,768
& nbsp
2640
01:05:42,778 --> 01:05:44,567
Go make calls
2641
01:05:44,577 --> 01:05:44,569
& nbsp
2642
01:05:44,579 --> 01:05:46,069
Why do you see my wife funny?
2643
01:05:46,079 --> 01:05:46,071
& nbsp
2644
01:05:46,081 --> 01:05:47,670
No, I don't see your wife funny?
2645
01:05:47,680 --> 01:05:47,672
& nbsp
2646
01:05:47,682 --> 01:05:49,105
I just feel uncomfortable with Brick.
2647
01:05:49,115 --> 01:05:49,107
& nbsp
2648
01:05:49,117 --> 01:05:52,976
I really never cared about what someone told me.
2649
01:05:52,986 --> 01:05:52,978
& nbsp
2650
01:05:52,988 --> 01:05:57,380
Unlike your physical presence,
Your fear is very high.
2651
01:05:57,390 --> 01:05:57,382
& nbsp
2652
01:05:57,392 --> 01:05:58,781
But that's not necessary.
2653
01:05:58,791 --> 01:05:58,783
& nbsp
2654
01:05:58,793 --> 01:06:01,752
We will get to
place, assess the situation,
2655
01:06:01,762 --> 01:06:01,754
& nbsp
2656
01:06:01,764 --> 01:06:04,186
and make sure you are protected.
2657
01:06:04,196 --> 01:06:04,188
& nbsp
2658
01:06:04,198 --> 01:06:06,922
I hope that bastard tries some nonsense.
2659
01:06:06,932 --> 01:06:06,924
& nbsp
2660
01:06:06,934 --> 01:06:09,058
- No, no.
- No, no.
2661
01:06:09,068 --> 01:06:09,060
& nbsp
2662
01:06:09,070 --> 01:06:11,761
Okay, everything will be fine.
2663
01:06:11,771 --> 01:06:11,763
& nbsp
2664
01:06:11,773 --> 01:06:15,431
We will go there,
You will be amazing,
2665
01:06:15,441 --> 01:06:15,433
& nbsp
2666
01:06:15,443 --> 01:06:17,634
and then, we will go home.
2667
01:06:17,644 --> 01:06:17,636
& nbsp
2668
01:06:17,646 --> 01:06:20,606
Because I also have a way
many plans for us, okay
2669
01:06:20,616 --> 01:06:22,040
& nbsp
2670
01:06:22,050 --> 01:06:23,909
You know what God says about plans, don't you?
2671
01:06:23,919 --> 01:06:26,612
& nbsp
2672
01:06:26,622 --> 01:06:28,014
You don't know
2673
01:06:28,024 --> 01:06:43,495
& nbsp
2674
01:06:43,505 --> 01:06:44,694
Hey,
2675
01:06:44,704 --> 01:06:44,696
& nbsp
2676
01:06:44,706 --> 01:06:47,130
I want to say something to you on that stage.
2677
01:06:47,140 --> 01:06:47,132
& nbsp
2678
01:06:47,142 --> 01:06:49,833
Oh, yes, what would you say?
2679
01:06:49,843 --> 01:06:49,835
& nbsp
2680
01:06:49,845 --> 01:06:55,005
I will say that you have
make my life so much better.
2681
01:06:55,015 --> 01:06:55,007
& nbsp
2682
01:06:55,017 --> 01:06:59,743
You know, whatever it is
happens between us, this...
2683
01:06:59,753 --> 01:06:59,745
& nbsp
2684
01:06:59,755 --> 01:07:01,080
just right
2685
01:07:01,090 --> 01:07:03,681
& nbsp
2686
01:07:03,691 --> 01:07:04,980
Am I right
2687
01:07:04,990 --> 01:07:04,982
& nbsp
2688
01:07:04,992 --> 01:07:07,083
I mean, if we really break it,
2689
01:07:07,093 --> 01:07:07,085
& nbsp
2690
01:07:07,095 --> 01:07:09,552
Do I make your life much better?
2691
01:07:09,562 --> 01:07:09,554
& nbsp
2692
01:07:09,564 --> 01:07:11,822
- I mean, there is a whole lie.
- Hmm.
2693
01:07:11,832 --> 01:07:11,824
& nbsp
2694
01:07:11,834 --> 01:07:14,023
- Criminal past
- Hmm.
2695
01:07:14,033 --> 01:07:14,025
& nbsp
2696
01:07:14,035 --> 01:07:16,628
Can you keep your mouth shut?
2697
01:07:16,638 --> 01:07:18,029
& nbsp
2698
01:07:19,939 --> 01:07:19,931
& nbsp
2699
01:07:19,941 --> 01:07:22,801
Well, let's introduce
Derek Hesh to the world.
2700
01:07:22,811 --> 01:07:31,877
& nbsp
2701
01:07:31,887 --> 01:07:35,715
♪
2702
01:07:35,725 --> 01:07:56,067
& nbsp
2703
01:07:56,077 --> 01:07:59,905
♪
2704
01:07:59,915 --> 01:08:07,379
& nbsp
2705
01:08:07,389 --> 01:08:09,115
That must be done.
2706
01:08:09,125 --> 01:08:12,049
& nbsp
2707
01:08:12,059 --> 01:08:16,018
For this, you two will get it
a lump when you come back, Sal.
2708
01:08:16,030 --> 01:08:17,953
You and Dom both.
2709
01:08:17,963 --> 01:08:17,955
& nbsp
2710
01:08:17,965 --> 01:08:19,456
We have big plans for you.
2711
01:08:19,466 --> 01:08:19,458
& nbsp
2712
01:08:19,468 --> 01:08:20,724
We appreciate that, Pat.
2713
01:08:20,734 --> 01:08:20,726
& nbsp
2714
01:08:20,736 --> 01:08:22,024
Of course.
2715
01:08:22,034 --> 01:08:22,026
& nbsp
2716
01:08:22,036 --> 01:08:23,762
What am I, beast
2717
01:08:23,772 --> 01:08:25,196
& nbsp
2718
01:08:25,206 --> 01:08:26,832
Call me when it's finished
2719
01:08:26,842 --> 01:08:30,436
& nbsp
2720
01:08:30,446 --> 01:08:32,501
You want to know the truth
2721
01:08:32,511 --> 01:08:32,503
& nbsp
2722
01:08:32,513 --> 01:08:33,636
Please, my enlightenment.
2723
01:08:33,646 --> 01:08:33,638
& nbsp
2724
01:08:33,648 --> 01:08:35,138
I will hit you with truth.
2725
01:08:35,148 --> 01:08:35,140
& nbsp
2726
01:08:35,150 --> 01:08:38,742
When a girl says "K", she doesn't care about you.
2727
01:08:38,752 --> 01:08:38,744
& nbsp
2728
01:08:38,754 --> 01:08:42,179
And when he said, "I like your
", that is not the code for love.
2729
01:08:42,189 --> 01:08:42,181
& nbsp
2730
01:08:42,191 --> 01:08:44,581
He is fucking like you, like it, that's all.
2731
01:08:44,591 --> 01:08:44,583
& nbsp
2732
01:08:44,593 --> 01:08:46,616
And he is silent at 9:00 a.m.,
2733
01:08:46,626 --> 01:08:46,618
& nbsp
2734
01:08:46,628 --> 01:08:49,519
there is a 99 percent chance
he fucks other people
2735
01:08:49,529 --> 01:08:49,521
& nbsp
2736
01:08:49,531 --> 01:08:51,488
You are crossing the line, Dom.
2737
01:08:51,498 --> 01:08:51,490
& nbsp
2738
01:08:51,500 --> 01:08:54,160
You really cross the damn line!
2739
01:08:54,170 --> 01:09:10,075
& nbsp
2740
01:09:10,085 --> 01:09:13,376
Damn Sammy in every dream
I once knew, you know that.
2741
01:09:13,386 --> 01:09:13,378
& nbsp
2742
01:09:13,388 --> 01:09:16,546
Dude, children like the breast balls all.
2743
01:09:16,556 --> 01:09:16,548
& nbsp
2744
01:09:16,558 --> 01:09:19,216
Not for nothing, Sal, modeling,
2745
01:09:19,226 --> 01:09:19,218
& nbsp
2746
01:09:19,228 --> 01:09:20,850
a little out there
2747
01:09:20,860 --> 01:09:20,852
& nbsp
2748
01:09:20,862 --> 01:09:23,385
I'm not comfortable looking
in certain circles.
2749
01:09:23,395 --> 01:09:23,387
& nbsp
2750
01:09:25,066 --> 01:09:30,395
& nbsp
2751
01:09:30,405 --> 01:09:32,295
Anyway, fuck Sam.
He's a rat.
2752
01:09:32,305 --> 01:09:32,297
& nbsp
2753
01:09:32,307 --> 01:09:33,930
- Is he a rat?
- Yeah, he's a rat
2754
01:09:33,940 --> 01:09:33,932
& nbsp
2755
01:09:33,942 --> 01:09:36,500
Everyone is a fucking mouse.
2756
01:09:36,510 --> 01:09:36,502
& nbsp
2757
01:09:36,512 --> 01:09:38,934
For everything we know, that's
Pat is dimming us.
2758
01:09:38,944 --> 01:09:38,936
& nbsp
2759
01:09:38,946 --> 01:09:41,003
I mean, that bastard
got intelligence on everyone
2760
01:09:41,013 --> 01:09:41,005
& nbsp
2761
01:09:41,015 --> 01:09:44,140
He knows where Sammy lives, what he does, where he goes,
2762
01:09:44,150 --> 01:09:44,142
& nbsp
2763
01:09:44,152 --> 01:09:45,841
Who else knows?
2764
01:09:45,851 --> 01:09:45,843
& nbsp
2765
01:09:45,853 --> 01:09:47,943
This is what it is, Dom.
2766
01:09:47,953 --> 01:09:47,945
& nbsp
2767
01:09:47,955 --> 01:09:50,313
Fuck phrases that are used too often.
2768
01:09:50,323 --> 01:09:50,315
& nbsp
2769
01:09:50,325 --> 01:09:51,984
Lorie likes the words.
2770
01:09:51,994 --> 01:09:53,584
& nbsp
2771
01:09:53,594 --> 01:09:55,520
[motor engine revving]
2772
01:09:55,530 --> 01:10:10,535
& nbsp
2773
01:10:10,545 --> 01:10:12,537
♪
2774
01:10:12,547 --> 01:10:17,241
& nbsp
2775
01:10:17,251 --> 01:10:19,876
[cellphone beeps]
2776
01:10:19,886 --> 01:10:19,878
& nbsp
2777
01:10:19,888 --> 01:10:21,778
I have to take this
2778
01:10:21,788 --> 01:10:21,780
& nbsp
2779
01:10:21,790 --> 01:10:22,845
Hello.
2780
01:10:22,855 --> 01:10:22,847
& nbsp
2781
01:10:22,857 --> 01:10:25,282
They say Derek Hesh is performing,
2782
01:10:25,292 --> 01:10:25,284
& nbsp
2783
01:10:25,294 --> 01:10:26,616
they don't even photograph you
2784
01:10:26,626 --> 01:10:26,618
& nbsp
2785
01:10:26,628 --> 01:10:28,350
Yes, they don't do it all the time.
2786
01:10:28,360 --> 01:10:28,352
& nbsp
2787
01:10:28,362 --> 01:10:30,153
Dear God, I swear to God, Sam Legucci,
2788
01:10:30,163 --> 01:10:30,155
& nbsp
2789
01:10:30,165 --> 01:10:31,488
If you aren't on TV tonight...
2790
01:10:31,498 --> 01:10:31,490
& nbsp
2791
01:10:31,500 --> 01:10:33,422
Calm down, okay
2792
01:10:33,432 --> 01:10:33,424
& nbsp
2793
01:10:33,434 --> 01:10:35,425
Wear Maddy on the phone.
2794
01:10:35,435 --> 01:10:35,427
& nbsp
2795
01:10:35,437 --> 01:10:37,726
Good, baby,
2796
01:10:37,736 --> 01:10:37,728
& nbsp
2797
01:10:37,738 --> 01:10:39,261
your father.
2798
01:10:39,271 --> 01:10:39,263
& nbsp
2799
01:10:39,273 --> 01:10:40,897
- Dad?
- Hello dear.
2800
01:10:40,907 --> 01:10:40,899
& nbsp
2801
01:10:40,909 --> 01:10:43,899
Daddy, you don't have to be so
nervous, you will be great
2802
01:10:43,909 --> 01:10:43,901
& nbsp
2803
01:10:43,911 --> 01:10:45,568
I know, listen, Maddy.
2804
01:10:45,578 --> 01:10:45,570
& nbsp
2805
01:10:45,580 --> 01:10:47,436
No matter what happens tonight,
2806
01:10:47,446 --> 01:10:47,438
& nbsp
2807
01:10:47,448 --> 01:10:48,738
I just want you to know that I love you
2808
01:10:48,748 --> 01:10:48,740
& nbsp
2809
01:10:48,750 --> 01:10:51,574
more than anything in the world, okay, baby
2810
01:10:51,584 --> 01:10:51,576
& nbsp
2811
01:10:51,586 --> 01:10:54,743
What do you mean?
This will be great.
2812
01:10:54,753 --> 01:10:54,745
& nbsp
2813
01:10:54,755 --> 01:10:56,145
I know.
2814
01:10:56,155 --> 01:10:56,147
& nbsp
2815
01:10:56,157 --> 01:10:58,247
Can you return your mother to the phone?
2816
01:10:58,257 --> 01:10:58,249
& nbsp
2817
01:10:58,259 --> 01:10:59,784
I love you, Maddy.
2818
01:10:59,794 --> 01:11:02,820
& nbsp
2819
01:11:02,830 --> 01:11:05,421
We will watch, Sammy Legucci.
2820
01:11:05,431 --> 01:11:05,423
& nbsp
2821
01:11:05,433 --> 01:11:07,122
I hope you know what you are doing.
2822
01:11:07,132 --> 01:11:07,124
& nbsp
2823
01:11:07,134 --> 01:11:08,359
Me too.
2824
01:11:08,369 --> 01:11:11,530
& nbsp
2825
01:11:11,540 --> 01:11:13,299
[beep cellphone]
2826
01:11:13,309 --> 01:11:15,467
& nbsp
2827
01:11:15,477 --> 01:11:17,167
[chuckles]
2828
01:11:17,177 --> 01:11:17,169
& nbsp
2829
01:11:17,179 --> 01:11:19,638
There must be love
there are at some point
2830
01:11:19,648 --> 01:11:21,339
& nbsp
2831
01:11:21,349 --> 01:11:24,306
I will call more like a strong and strong
.
2832
01:11:24,316 --> 01:11:24,308
& nbsp
2833
01:11:24,318 --> 01:11:26,876
Okay, what is this with Derek Hesh?
2834
01:11:26,886 --> 01:11:26,878
& nbsp
2835
01:11:26,888 --> 01:11:29,746
Uh, millions of hits, kid's blowing up,
2836
01:11:29,756 --> 01:11:29,748
& nbsp
2837
01:11:29,758 --> 01:11:31,648
I mean, this event is
very lucky to have it.
2838
01:11:31,658 --> 01:11:31,650
& nbsp
2839
01:11:31,660 --> 01:11:34,451
Well, I've heard about Chappelle.
I already
Heard of Attell, I've heard of Rock.
2840
01:11:34,463 --> 01:11:36,051
I've never heard of Hesh.
2841
01:11:36,061 --> 01:11:36,053
& nbsp
2842
01:11:36,063 --> 01:11:38,056
Well, you will be after tonight.
2843
01:11:38,066 --> 01:11:54,972
& nbsp
2844
01:11:54,982 --> 01:11:57,439
Didn't I say you would take you here?
2845
01:11:57,449 --> 01:11:57,441
& nbsp
2846
01:11:57,451 --> 01:11:58,841
Thank you, Manny.
2847
01:11:58,851 --> 01:11:58,843
& nbsp
2848
01:11:58,853 --> 01:11:59,908
Hey,
2849
01:11:59,918 --> 01:11:59,910
& nbsp
2850
01:11:59,920 --> 01:12:02,979
I know this is difficult for you
to understand our world,
2851
01:12:02,989 --> 01:12:02,981
& nbsp
2852
01:12:02,991 --> 01:12:04,416
This is what we do.
2853
01:12:04,426 --> 01:12:06,450
& nbsp
2854
01:12:06,460 --> 01:12:08,019
Now, tap them.
2855
01:12:08,029 --> 01:12:17,361
& nbsp
2856
01:12:17,371 --> 01:12:18,827
"Knock them dead?"
2857
01:12:18,837 --> 01:12:18,829
& nbsp
2858
01:12:18,839 --> 01:12:20,630
What do you mean, "special bait"?
2859
01:12:20,640 --> 01:12:20,632
& nbsp
2860
01:12:20,642 --> 01:12:25,300
This is welcometotheshow.
tv, and we
can watch live all their recordings.
2861
01:12:25,310 --> 01:12:25,302
& nbsp
2862
01:12:25,312 --> 01:12:28,773
We will see Daddy
TV, this will be great.
2863
01:12:28,783 --> 01:12:31,243
& nbsp
2864
01:12:31,253 --> 01:12:33,710
That will be very good, honey.
2865
01:12:33,720 --> 01:12:33,712
& nbsp
2866
01:12:33,722 --> 01:12:36,779
Mother, you have to give
she breaks, she is trying
2867
01:12:36,789 --> 01:12:36,781
& nbsp
2868
01:12:36,791 --> 01:12:38,515
What else can you ask for?
2869
01:12:38,525 --> 01:12:38,517
& nbsp
2870
01:12:38,527 --> 01:12:39,849
And he's famous.
2871
01:12:39,859 --> 01:12:39,851
& nbsp
2872
01:12:39,861 --> 01:12:41,187
He is famous.
2873
01:12:41,197 --> 01:12:42,687
& nbsp
2874
01:12:42,697 --> 01:12:44,222
- Let's do it?
- good
Mm-hmm.
2875
01:12:44,232 --> 01:12:59,570
& nbsp
2876
01:12:59,580 --> 01:13:01,472
You know this is amazing right?
2877
01:13:01,482 --> 01:13:02,507
& nbsp
2878
01:13:02,517 --> 01:13:04,373
You can get your moment.
2879
01:13:04,383 --> 01:13:04,375
& nbsp
2880
01:13:04,385 --> 01:13:06,975
Not everyone can get their moments.
2881
01:13:06,985 --> 01:13:06,977
& nbsp
2882
01:13:06,987 --> 01:13:08,379
Hmm.
2883
01:13:08,389 --> 01:13:12,851
& nbsp
2884
01:13:12,861 --> 01:13:14,486
See you when it's all over.
2885
01:13:14,496 --> 01:13:19,524
& nbsp
2886
01:13:19,534 --> 01:13:22,093
[romantic pop song playing]
2887
01:13:22,103 --> 01:13:54,092
& nbsp
2888
01:13:54,102 --> 01:13:56,128
♪
2889
01:13:56,138 --> 01:14:24,054
& nbsp
2890
01:14:24,064 --> 01:14:26,926
Well, if not Don fucking Rickles.
2891
01:14:26,936 --> 01:14:29,994
& nbsp
2892
01:14:30,004 --> 01:14:31,760
[gunshot]
2893
01:14:31,770 --> 01:14:31,762
& nbsp
2894
01:14:31,772 --> 01:14:34,163
- Don't move bad luck.
- don't you move?
2895
01:14:34,173 --> 01:14:34,165
& nbsp
2896
01:14:36,811 --> 01:14:39,937
& nbsp
2897
01:14:39,947 --> 01:14:41,472
[Dom panting]
2898
01:14:41,482 --> 01:14:42,774
& nbsp
2899
01:14:42,784 --> 01:14:45,043
I'm very sick of your whining.
2900
01:14:45,053 --> 01:14:46,244
& nbsp
2901
01:14:47,654 --> 01:14:47,646
& nbsp
2902
01:14:47,656 --> 01:14:49,578
what's the matter
2903
01:14:49,588 --> 01:14:49,580
& nbsp
2904
01:14:49,590 --> 01:14:50,979
Oh my God.
2905
01:14:50,989 --> 01:14:50,981
& nbsp
2906
01:14:50,991 --> 01:14:52,982
Dom, I met some people.
2907
01:14:52,992 --> 01:14:52,984
& nbsp
2908
01:14:52,994 --> 01:14:54,516
They can hide you, come with me.
2909
01:14:54,526 --> 01:14:54,518
& nbsp
2910
01:14:54,528 --> 01:14:56,185
No, bro.
2911
01:14:56,195 --> 01:14:56,187
& nbsp
2912
01:14:58,364 --> 01:14:58,356
& nbsp
2913
01:14:58,366 --> 01:15:00,657
You're unlucky.
2914
01:15:00,667 --> 01:15:00,659
& nbsp
2915
01:15:00,669 --> 01:15:02,725
I'm proud of you, bro.
2916
01:15:02,735 --> 01:15:02,727
& nbsp
2917
01:15:02,737 --> 01:15:04,661
I always love you, Dom.
2918
01:15:04,673 --> 01:15:06,028
Thank you.
2919
01:15:06,040 --> 01:15:07,263
Excuse me.
2920
01:15:07,273 --> 01:15:07,265
& nbsp
2921
01:15:08,842 --> 01:15:08,834
& nbsp
2922
01:15:08,844 --> 01:15:10,800
You are in five minutes.
2923
01:15:10,810 --> 01:15:10,802
& nbsp
2924
01:15:10,812 --> 01:15:12,534
I'm sorry.
2925
01:15:15,851 --> 01:15:18,174
I only met some old friends.
2926
01:15:18,184 --> 01:15:18,176
& nbsp
2927
01:15:18,186 --> 01:15:19,578
Okay, let's go
2928
01:15:19,588 --> 01:15:28,386
& nbsp
2929
01:15:28,396 --> 01:15:30,452
[Ian] Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to the event,
2930
01:15:30,462 --> 01:15:30,454
& nbsp
2931
01:15:30,464 --> 01:15:32,956
we are happy to have it,
give it, you guys,
2932
01:15:32,966 --> 01:15:32,958
& nbsp
2933
01:15:32,968 --> 01:15:37,827
for the very funny,
funny, Derek Hesh.
2934
01:15:37,837 --> 01:15:37,829
& nbsp
2935
01:15:37,839 --> 01:15:40,195
Thank you very much, thank you
2936
01:15:42,477 --> 01:15:44,167
Maddy, look at this,
2937
01:15:44,177 --> 01:15:44,169
& nbsp
2938
01:15:50,352 --> 01:15:51,875
Um...
2939
01:16:01,994 --> 01:16:01,986
& nbsp
2940
01:16:01,996 --> 01:16:04,686
- [cheering]
- Right.
2941
01:16:04,696 --> 01:16:04,688
& nbsp
2942
01:16:04,698 --> 01:16:05,955
Thank you.
2943
01:16:05,965 --> 01:16:05,957
& nbsp
2944
01:16:05,967 --> 01:16:07,689
Um, you know, I'm not
Google or what
2945
01:16:07,699 --> 01:16:07,691
& nbsp
2946
01:16:07,701 --> 01:16:11,226
but I'm sure I'm the first
comedian in comedy history
2947
01:16:11,236 --> 01:16:11,228
& nbsp
2948
01:16:11,238 --> 01:16:14,631
to do The Show while
is still in the Witness Protection Program.
2949
01:16:14,641 --> 01:16:14,633
& nbsp
2950
01:16:14,643 --> 01:16:18,300
Yes, the program has new things
they try, they throw you on TV,
2951
01:16:18,310 --> 01:16:18,302
& nbsp
2952
01:16:18,312 --> 01:16:20,636
and just hope for the best.
2953
01:16:20,646 --> 01:16:20,638
& nbsp
2954
01:16:20,648 --> 01:16:22,639
Uh, but actually,
2955
01:16:22,649 --> 01:16:22,641
& nbsp
2956
01:16:22,651 --> 01:16:24,207
has a hard comment for everyone
2957
01:16:24,217 --> 01:16:24,209
& nbsp
2958
01:16:24,219 --> 01:16:26,074
actually not bad
how to enter comedy.
2959
01:16:26,084 --> 01:16:26,076
& nbsp
2960
01:16:26,086 --> 01:16:28,711
I mean, I've been in the
program for, like, a month now,
2961
01:16:28,721 --> 01:16:28,713
& nbsp
2962
01:16:28,723 --> 01:16:31,381
I must have offended the whole city.
2963
01:16:31,391 --> 01:16:31,383
& nbsp
2964
01:16:31,393 --> 01:16:33,515
Um...
2965
01:16:33,525 --> 01:16:33,517
& nbsp
2966
01:16:33,527 --> 01:16:35,617
But to find out how I got here,
2967
01:16:35,627 --> 01:16:35,619
& nbsp
2968
01:16:35,629 --> 01:16:38,421
we have to start with me
family, ha, my family
2969
01:16:38,431 --> 01:16:38,423
& nbsp
2970
01:16:38,433 --> 01:16:39,956
My father,
2971
01:16:39,966 --> 01:16:39,958
& nbsp
2972
01:16:39,968 --> 01:16:41,991
the last thing he told me
Before he left, he was like,
2973
01:16:42,001 --> 01:16:41,993
& nbsp
2974
01:16:42,003 --> 01:16:44,260
"Son, you are the person
from home now."
2975
01:16:44,270 --> 01:16:44,262
& nbsp
2976
01:16:44,272 --> 01:16:46,265
I thought to myself, "I am seven years old."
2977
01:16:46,275 --> 01:16:47,332
& nbsp
2978
01:16:47,342 --> 01:16:48,797
He is a bank robber.
2979
01:16:48,807 --> 01:16:48,799
& nbsp
2980
01:16:48,809 --> 01:16:51,300
Not good, we never have money.
2981
01:16:51,310 --> 01:16:51,302
& nbsp
2982
01:16:51,312 --> 01:16:54,237
Man is extraordinary,
That person is extraordinary.
2983
01:16:54,247 --> 01:16:54,239
& nbsp
2984
01:16:54,249 --> 01:16:56,906
I mean, the last time I saw it,
He came out to bring a box of milk,
2985
01:16:56,916 --> 01:16:56,908
& nbsp
2986
01:16:56,918 --> 01:17:00,108
the next time I see him, he is in a milk carton.
2987
01:17:00,118 --> 01:17:00,110
& nbsp
2988
01:17:00,120 --> 01:17:02,478
I mean, he kept sending
I photographed himself.
2989
01:17:02,488 --> 01:17:02,480
& nbsp
2990
01:17:02,490 --> 01:17:05,614
Always wear the same
things, orange jumpsuit.
2991
01:17:05,624 --> 01:17:05,616
& nbsp
2992
01:17:05,626 --> 01:17:08,784
I just thought he liked
Halloween, what do I know, right?
2993
01:17:08,794 --> 01:17:08,786
& nbsp
2994
01:17:08,796 --> 01:17:11,921
But, you know, I promise
myself, I will never be like him,
2995
01:17:11,931 --> 01:17:11,923
& nbsp
2996
01:17:11,933 --> 01:17:15,060
no siree, I will never be like him,
2997
01:17:15,070 --> 01:17:19,330
& nbsp
2998
01:17:19,340 --> 01:17:21,029
But I think life
gambles, right?
2999
01:17:21,039 --> 01:17:21,031
& nbsp
3000
01:17:21,041 --> 01:17:25,068
I mean, I made everything
the way here on the bet.
3001
01:17:25,078 --> 01:17:25,070
& nbsp
3002
01:17:25,080 --> 01:17:26,935
So you know what, from now on,
3003
01:17:26,945 --> 01:17:26,937
& nbsp
3004
01:17:26,947 --> 01:17:29,037
I will bet on myself.
3005
01:17:29,047 --> 01:17:29,039
& nbsp
3006
01:17:29,049 --> 01:17:31,440
That's right, I'll
bet on Sammy Legucci
3007
01:17:31,450 --> 01:17:31,442
& nbsp
3008
01:17:31,452 --> 01:17:32,908
[audience claps]
3009
01:17:32,918 --> 01:17:32,910
& nbsp
3010
01:17:32,920 --> 01:17:36,981
I appreciate your time, thank you
very much, thank you, thank you
3011
01:17:36,991 --> 01:17:38,350
& nbsp
3012
01:17:38,360 --> 01:17:41,050
Maddy, I love you so much
a lot, see you later
3013
01:17:41,060 --> 01:17:41,052
& nbsp
3014
01:17:41,062 --> 01:17:43,519
Thank you very much.
3015
01:17:43,529 --> 01:17:43,521
& nbsp
3016
01:17:43,531 --> 01:17:45,354
Thank you.
3017
01:17:45,364 --> 01:17:45,356
& nbsp
3018
01:17:45,366 --> 01:17:46,488
Thank you.
3019
01:17:46,498 --> 01:17:46,490
& nbsp
3020
01:17:46,500 --> 01:17:48,558
Thank you very much.
Thank you.
3021
01:17:48,568 --> 01:17:48,560
& nbsp
3022
01:17:48,570 --> 01:17:50,561
[audience cheers]
3023
01:17:50,571 --> 01:17:51,636
& nbsp
3024
01:17:51,646 --> 01:17:56,636
Synchronize and correct by explosives
3025
01:17:56,646 --> 01:18:01,646
Submitted by:
www.subtitlecinema.com