Subtitles by explosiveskull
[POLICE SIRENS AND HELICOPTER]
[POLICE RADIO CHATTER]
VOICE: Suspect is armed and extremely dangerous.
Snipers let me know when you are in position.
You have a shot, take it.
DETECTIVE: This is the police. We have you surrounded.
Come out with your hands up.
[YELLING IN BACKGROUND, SIRENS STILL HEARD]
Release the hostages, Jimmy.
Go kid.
Release the hostages, Jimmy! Do it now!
[GUN CLICKS]
[GUN CONTINUES CLICKING]
DETECTIVE: No one has to die here tonight.
Come on, man. [gun clicks]
[KABOOM]
[OMINOUS DRONE]
♪ SOFT PIANO PLAYS ♪
[CAR SOUNDS]
♪ SOFT MUSIC BUILDS INTENSITY ♪
LORRAINE: Get out of the car.
♪ SINISTER PIANO ♪
[SWOOSH EFFECT]
[GOOFY SOUND EFFECTS WITH X-FILES MUSIC]
SHERYL: Ah!
STAN: You motherfuckers, get the hell off my property!
LORRAINE: Whoa, whoa. Are you fucking kidding me, right now?
PETER: Lorraine, he has an axe.
LORRAINE: Stan, Lorraine Taylor. "Ghostly Night Watch."
Yeah, we're the TV people.
STAN: Oh, yeah. [Laughs]
LORRAINE: Yeah. STAN: Hi, TV people.
STAN: Oh. LORRAINE: Hi. Hey, may I?
LORRAINE: Great.
[CUCKOO CLOCK SOUND]
SHERYL: Oh, okay. No offense, but obviously this place is haunted.
Case closed.
PETER: Ew, wonder how long that's been there.
SHERYL: Ew. DANIEL: Ah!
What is it?
Ants. PETER: What?
No, I'm terrified of ants.
Ah!
We heard screaming.
Daniel saw an ant.
Oh, well, everyone. This is Stan. Stan bought this place
in foreclosure after the incident. [thud] [screaming]
I told you fools it wasn't safe to be here today.
Stan, Stan, we talked about this. Yeah.
I am so sorry. I forgot my manners.
This place, it just gets me out of sorts.
It's okay.
This way. Brochures are $2, by the way.
Okay, you two, listen. I need you to be super convincing.
I need you get into character, get in there and
conduct a proper interview. You got me?
But I'm not a real forensic detective.
I don't know how to interview.
Yeah. And I'm not really psychic, so-
Oh, newsflash. You're actors, so act.
Yeah, yeah.
♪ SCARY MUSIC ♪
SHERYL: Oh, Jimmy. Oh, oh, oooh, oh, oh, oh.
I can feel his presence.Aah. Aah.
This is not being taken seriously.
Shut the camera off. I'm done.
LORRAINE: No, no, no. Stan, wait. We are taking this very seriously.
Sir, tell us about the alleged incidents that you alleged
to have happened around the alleged property.
I'll tell you this. Buying this house was a big mistake.
I mean, I thought I'd make a fortune
in murder tour tickets. But no. One bad Yelp review,
and that bus just stopped coming. I can't even sleep
here because he won't let me. I actually had to move
back into my mama's house.
Tell me, have you ever seen or witnessed
this ghost of a serial killer?
I'll tell what I have seen. Shadows that shouldn't be there
but are. Cold spots, even in the summertime.
Lights turning off and on and shit.
Jimmy, if you're here, turn this light off right now.
I command thee.
DANIEL: Oh, victim Stan, what about the horrific crime
scene in the murder room.
That's where he shot himself exactly five years ago tonight.
I won't go near it.
He actually kept the bodies in a closet over there.
Little Mittens won't go near it either.
And he's the friendliest cat you're ever gonna meet.
[THUMP] DANIEL: Ah!
SHERYL: Ah! The cat?
That wasn't no damn cat.
Take it easy, Stan.
What? LORRAINE: Put it down.
Y'all just don't get it, do you? The spirit is evil!
With a capital Evil! It wants to cross over, and mark my words,
he will do anything to come through.
Do not underestimate Jimmy Timmy Beck.
[WHOOSH SOUND]
PETER: Uh, Jimmy Timmy?
Don't start. We'll just shorten his name for dramatic effect.
SHERYL: So Jim Tim?
Oh.
Hey, Bob, it's me.
BOB (ON PHONE): Oh, Lorraine.
I think I'm gonna buy this other show. I was talking to Aisha-
No, no, no. You don't buy another show.
This show is going to be awesome, and you are going to
want this, and you are not going to buy anything from Aisha
because she is a lying slutbag, and I am going to deliver
something amazing to you in a week.
BOB: [Voice cutting out]
No. Fine, fine. I'll have a cut to you
in 48 hours, Bob, I promise. Bob.
[PHONE BEEPS, CALL LOST]
Two years ago I was up for an Emmy and dating a Wahlberg.
STAN: Do you have a check for me?
Shit, Stan, you scared me!
No. I don't have a check for you today.
No discretionary funds.
What the hell does that mean?
It means you're an associate producer now.
Hmm, is that important?
Oh, yeah. All right.
Okay. So you just drive safe.
We'll see you in a couple days.
Doesn't anybody have a landline anymore?
PETER: We're lucky this place has working plumbing.
So I thought that...
LORRAINE: So here's what we're gonna do. I want you take this
and I want you to go measure for cold spots like those, um, those
other ghost hunting shows do. Yeah. Oh, if you find the guys
cat, bonus. We use it as a prop.
[BUZZ SOUND]
♪ OMINOUS MUSIC BEGINS ♪
[MAGNETIC BUZZING CONTINUES]
This place gives me the creeps.
[MAGNETIC BUZZING AMPLIFIES]
[MAGNETIC BUZZING CONTINUES]
[SCARY WHOOSH EFFECT]
♪ OMINOUS MUSIC CONTINUES ♪
[CREAKY, WINDY SOUND EFFECT]
SHERYL: I know you said you're not that observant.
I saw that.
[CREAKY, SCARY, SOUNDS]
Ah! Lorraine!
♪ SOFT EERIE MUSIC ♪
[BUZZING]
DANIEL: Oh! Oh, Jesus. SHERYL: Oh no.
SHERYL: Oh.
Oh, sweet hay bales, there's the closet.
Oh, number 12, Adele. Hello?
Good idea. We should pray.
No, no, no. My acting coach told me that I should count down my
favorite songs every time I get nervous, so I'm on number 11.
Beyonce, "Crazy in Love."
Oh. [humming] "Back That Azz Up" by Juvenile.
♪ SINGING ♪
[LOUD NOISE] [screaming]
LORRAINE: What's happening?
DANIEL: Uh, uh, uh, he was here.
He was here and we saw him.
PETER: Who was? Mittens?
No, the ghost.
Start recording and get in the corner, okay?
Hey, hey, follow me. Measure for cold spots.
LORRAINE: Hey, hey, measure for cold spots.
Use your device.
DANIEL: As I get closer to the closet,
the temperature drops because that is where Jimmy ate
his victims. Right, Sheryl?
Um, the spirits are telling me that's where they were digested.
SHERYL: Now I'm going to try and communicate with the spirit
Jimmy Timmy Beck.
Just Jimmy.
Just Jimmy. Can you give us a sign to show us you're
here, Jimmy? [BUZZING]
We're not asking for much. Just a sign, a real sign.
Just dropped four degrees cooler near the closet.
SHERYL: Is that you, Jimmy?
[LOUD SCARY NOISE] AH!
Maybe that was the cat.
That's a big fucking cat.
[SCREAMING]
JIMMY: Son of a bitch, something bit me!
LORRAINE: Cut! You're fired.
What? Because of a bug bite? I'm calling my agent.
LORRAINE: Go call your agent.
You're still fired. You suck. Afraid of fucking bugs.
I think I had a minor stroke.
I think I wet myself.
DANIEL: I'm gonna have a long-term fear of closets.
SHERYL: Hey, what's going on here?
Did you hire an actor who looks just like the real Jimmy Beck,
and [laughs] why was he hiding in the closet?
I hired a look alike. So what? edit out the last five seconds
and we have two TV hosts scared shitless encountering the ghost
of a crazed serial killer. Winning.
SHERYL: But he's not really a ghost.
And you aren't really a psychic. This is reality TV and we are
creating the reality TV that people want.
Fuck, I have an idea. Go get that idiot.
You two have no idea what is on the line here.
If this works, I promise you it is going to be life
changing for all of us. I just need you guys to run around for
a couple hours, play ghost hunters, look scared
around every corner, and I promise you I'm gonna make this
worth your while. How's a spa weekend on me sound?
Very thoughtful and sweet.
But unfortunately, I can't accept that.
Why? Guys do spas all the time.
Oh, it's not that. I'm just super scared of steam.
Oh, come on! Do you know how many red carpets
I have been to this year?
None! I need this.
I want this. I can feel it.
And if you aren't with me, there's the door.
Well, it's kind of far back to town and I don't think
you'll give me a ride, so yes, for the spa weekend, I'll do it.
Yeah. As long as you don't scare me anymore.
I am so proud I cast you two.
PETER: Find an actor? Find my dick with your lips.
ACTOR: Mom, can you come get me? I... hello?
[CROWS CAWING] Hello. Ah! [CALL DROPS]
[CHAINSAW SOUND EFFECT] [Screams]
PETER: Hmm.
[mumbles] Huh.
Dude's a ghost.
DANIEL: Three bedroom, two bath in the valley.
SHERYL: Ah, kudos on the two full baths in case you have
a guest, you know?
LORRAINE: Oh ya. Oh, and the guy from "One Tree Hill" is my neighor
SHERYL: Ooh.
You live next to Jean Claude Van Damme?
Did you sleep with him yet?
PETER: Sleep with who?
Inappropriate, Pete.
I was just asking. Anyway, no idea where that actor dude went.
Yeah, I'll deal with him later. Get the camera on the
closet door, and hurry!
DANIEL: Huh!
Whoa!
Sorry, I missed it.
Story of my life.
DANIEL: You rigged the door.
Of course. Do you think they open on their own?
[ELECTRIC SOUND EFFECTS]
Did you rig that too?
No, I didn't.
Hey, guys. Listen to this.
DEMONIC VOICE: This is my house.
Holy bats in the belfry.
That really happened. There's really a ghost.
[POP]
LORRAINE: Yeah, to being ghost hunters.
SHERYL: Hmm, to being famous.
You know what? It is time to put the past behind us. To all the
people that doubted me, especially producers named Bob.
That indie role I probably didn't get.
To my ex-girlfriend Janet who left me in the church,
and now she's a whore.
SHERYL: Oh, no I'm sure she's not.
No. She's a legit whore.
Yeah. She barters her vagina for cocaine.
Oh.
Okay.
PETER: Uh, not really good at this stuff, but, um, my dad got
cancer last year and beat it.
That's great.
Then he died in a car accident, which sucked. It was a stormy
night, the road was really windy, and the... the
cliff kinda jumped out at him. Plus he was hammered. But he was
a really good drunk driver normally. I was supposed to pick
him up but, uh, I got sidetracked on Tinder talking to
this girl. I sent her a dick pic, she sent me a dick pic
back, which was really... anyway. He sent me a text right
before he disintegrated.
He said, "Son, I want you to know...
my fucking car's on fire."
I still have the text.
Okay, then. Um, let's get back to it.
I'd like a camera over there. You think you can
handle that, Pete?
Yeah. Okay.
Sure.
♪ SOFT SPOOKY SOUNDS ♪
[LEAVES RUSTLING]
Put a camera in all of these trees, Pete? All the
trees? Yeah, all the trees, Pete,
because [BIRDS CAWING] I want you to do all this extra work.
[BIRDS CONTINUE TO CAW]
LORRAINE: Pete, time is money.
PETER: This is for producers named Bob that don't respect me and admire
me like Pete does, because who gives a fuck
what Pete thinks.
Oh, this is for that role I didn't get because I didn't blow
enough producers. Oh, this is for my ex-girlfriend selling her
twat for crack cocaine.
I don't even like champagne.
LORRAINE: Peter!
I'm putting up the camera.
[BIRDS CAWING]
LORRAINE: Time is money!
Yes, ma'am.
[BIRDS CAWING]
SHERYL: You ever get the feeling we're being watched?
LORRAINE: Stop complaining about stalkers. At my age you're gonna
want someone to follow you home and watch you undress.
No. I mean, like, right now.
What? [TORTURED SCREAMING]
Ah!
What was that?
What the hell?
What is that?
PETER: Hey, guys. [SCREAMING]
Found some beef jerky.
Can you stop screwing around and go get your camera?
Okay. Time to check out the room we're calling the death chamber.
[DISTANT HOWLING]
LORRAINE: Okay. So you guys remember what we rehearsed?
Good, good. Pete, are you rolling? And action.
SHERYL: We're here on the Beck property, haunted site
of numerous grisly murders. As you can see, it's very dark and
I can feel that evil is present.
DANIEL: The killer buried lots of bodies around
this here Beck property. My partner will use her psychic
powers. I will use my forensic science expertise. We will
locate and conquer this paranormal activity
that we detect.
Now, the spirit has already shown
some displeasure with us being here,
so we have to be very careful.
Okay. No one's gonna jump out of here though, right?
LORRAINE: No. SHERYL: No. We'll be fine.
[DOOR CREAKS] [CRICKET SOUNDS]
[FLY BUZZING]
[HEAVY DOOR SLAM]
♪ PARANORMAL MUSIC ♪
SHERYL: Hmm. DANIEL: Hmm.
Hmm. Hmm.
There seems to be a red paint-like substance on the
- Hmm. - floor here.
[BLOOD DRIP SOUNDS]
SHERYL: Ah. Yes, I think that's blood.
Oh. [FLY BUZZING] Ah, hmm.
Oh.
[BLOOD DRIPS AND FLY BUZZING CONTINUE]
Hmm, well, that's strange.
Hmm.
[SCREAMING]
[GUSHY BLOOD DRIPS]
[SCREAMS CONTINUE AND FADE]
Ew, ew, ew.
PETER: [laughing] We found the cat.
Shut up.
God, my top. Oh, I've got cat blood on me.
I can't get blood exposure from this, can I?
Like, cat hepatitis?
- Awesome. - How did it look?
- Yeah. - Swear?
Mm, Let me see it.
Blood, boobs, money shot. Oh, my God.
Was this you, Lorraine?
Me?
Yeah. You wanted the cat as a prop.
Judge Judy would call that a motive, man.
Okay. I donate to PETA, and I am deathly allergic of cats.
Hey, who turned the house lights off?
[ELECTRICITY BUZZING]
DANIEL: Uh, um- LORRAINE: Let's get in there.
Our psychic is gonna call out that ghost.
Wait, what? How am I gonna do that?
Positive energy. Let's do this.
Uh, you should really clean that shirt up.
[whining]
I bet you blood on boobs attracts ghosts.
LORRAINE: Inappropriate, Pete!
Sorry!
[GOAT SOUNDS EFFECTS] [CRICKETS]
SHERYL: Oh, I can't wait to get this blood off.
LORRAINE: Whoa. SHERYL: Oh, God.
I don't remember my 20s being so perky.
PETER: Got you some flashlights. Holy tits!
- Sorry. I was just, uh- - Inappropriate, Pete.
Here's some extra batteries.
- Pete! - That's a really nice rack.
[CRICKETS]
Hey!
Somebody's been in here.
That door was open when we left.
Don't you bullshit me, Pete.
[ELECTRICITY BUZZING]
DANIEL: Okay. This can't be good. We should go back outside.
LORRAINE: No, this is great. Keep rolling.
[DOOR CREAKING]
At least my timer still works.
Your timer's not there.
LORRAINE: Oh.
SHERYL: Something's fishy here.
Like with the house.
I don't trust her.
Pete, you need to tell us what she's up to.
Me? How would I know?
Look, even if it is her, she's never gone this far before.
Don't make me do it.
What, are you guys like five?
[SQUEAK AND DOOR SLAM]
Actor guy?
LORRAINE: Who's in there?
Keep rolling. We're going in.
I'm not going in there.
Don't you pull the diva card with me, young lady.
When I found you, you were Drunk Sorority Chick Number 3 on an
episode of "Scream Queens."
For the record, I was Drunk Girl Number 2.
Whatever.
You were on "Scream Queens"?
Get in there now.
[HOWLING AND CRICKET SOUNDS INTENSIFY]
♪ SOFT SPOOKY AMBIENCE ♪
SHERYL: Hello? Jimmy?
Was that you we heard?
If this was a horror film, a cat would jump out right now.
Pretty sure the cat's jumping days are over.
That's a good point, Pete. Poor little Mittens.
Jimmy, if that was you, can you do that again?
[BUZZING SOUND]
DANIEL: 70 degrees even.
Uh, uh. [sigh]
[ATMOSPHERIC SOUNDS BUILD]
[DOOR CREAKING]
♪ GOOFY INSPECTOR MUSIC ♪
DANIEL: Still 70 degrees.
[CAR HORN HONKING] [BUZZING]
LORRAINE: Son of a bitch.
[MACHINE BEEPS, CAR HONKING]
DANIEL: It just went up a degree.
[HONKING CONTINUES]
LORRAINE: What the fuck... [gasps]. Holy fucking shit - Are you -
[muffled screams] [CAR HONKING CONTINUES]
[LIGHT SWTICH SOUND EFFECT]
DANIEL: Pete, you got anymore batteries.
SHERYL: Yeah. He's got a lot of batteries.
PETER: Um, yeah. They're Cs.
DANIEL: Oh. SHERYL: Oh, God.
What do-these take Ds?
I prefer Double Ds.
I can't believe I'm in the middle of this.
I can't believe I'm in the middle of this either.
I want to go home.
PETER: It's gonna be okay, buddy. It's gonna be okay.
[ELECTRICITY CRACKLES]
See?
Anything? [MACHINE STARTS BEEPING]
Instant temperature drop. Back in business.
[RELIEVED SIGH]
Uh, actually...
Oh. I think we just debunked our cold spots.
[MACHINE BEEPING]
Where's Lorraine. [ELECTRICITY CRACKLING]
Looks like there's our answer.
Debunked our light problem. It's our producer, Lorraine.
That's two for two. Come on out, Lorraine.
I don't think this is Lorraine.
My inner voice is telling me this is definitely her.
You know what we should do?
Call Judge Judy right now.
No. We should scare her.
I don't think that's possible. One time
I saw her get bit by a rattlesnake.
She sucked out the poison, killed the snake, and then made
me a belt. She's like Chuck Norris, just way sexier.
Okay. Well, look. If she wants to mess around with dead cats
and all this sick shit, I say we give it right back to her.
Like the Ten Commandments. When people do
stuff to you, you gotta do stuff back to people.
Exactly. If she wants to keep scaring us, guess what?
Two people can play at that game.
DANIEL: Maybe we should hide or something.
PETER: I'm not hiding. I'm a grownup.
SHERYL: She's hiding and she's got a three-bedroom house in the
valley. PETER: Had a house.
What?
She had a House. She sold it to pay for this show.
Now she lives above a methadone clinic a mile from
me in Van Nuys
Oh, she's such a liar.
She's a Class A sinner, that one.
Oh, she's got a good heart and she's just, uh...
buries it deep, really, really deep.
SHERYL: Mm, you so have a crush on her.
Oh, no. [laughs] No, I...
SHERYL: Whatever. She's just using you. I think she likes chicks.
No, she doesn't!
[ELECTRICITY CRACKLES]
DANIEL: Can we please just find her and prove that she
is behind all of this? Because if not, I am going to be
convinced that there is a ghost under my bed
the rest of my life.
Okay. We'll be those meddling kids from "Dukes
of Hazzard." You can be Bo, you can be Luke, and I'll be Daisy.
PETER: Uh, meddling kids was "Scooby Doo," and that was Daphne.
DANIEL: Yeah. I don't want to be the racist people from that show
that got canceled for being racist.
They weren't racist.
Says the white guy.
I'm half Portuguese.
Okay. So is she Daphne or is she Daisy?
I'm so confused.
Can we just find the fuse box?
Yes. Maybe in there.
LORRAINE: [muffled screams] Hey! Hey! [screaming]
♪ GOOFY INSPECTOR MUSIC ♪
SHERYL: I bet it's in the garage.
DANIEL: More blood. SHERYL: Ooh.
[BLOOD DRIP SOUNDS] DANIEL: That is blood, right, Pete?
PETER: Oh, yeah.
Oh, Lorraine. I just got over the last dead animal.
I'm not going in there, guys. You don't understand.
I have an extreme phobia of being murdered.
That's not a phobia. Everybody's afraid of being murdered.
Well, I don't care. I'm gonna go outside and
wait for Lorraine.
[ROPE TIGHTENING SOUND EFFECT]
EMMETT: [Sniffing] Mm.
Nice boots.
LORRAINE: [Muffled] Thank you.
[SPOOKY AMBIENCE ]
[CRICKETS]
SHERYL: Get the champagne, Pete.
Wait a second. DANIEL: What?
Look. [SPOOKY AMBIENCE INTENSIFIES]
This car is a 2012. You can tell right by the steering wheel.
She always told me it was brand new.
Huh. Time to drink.
[CRICKETS]
[MUFFLED SCREAMS]
[CLATTERING TOOLS]
EMMETT: Sea salt filtered through holy water, blessed by
a Catholic Bishop.
One spirit-detecting candle made by a Native American shaman.
I'm sorry, but today being the very anniversary of
Jimmy's suicide, it's the only day that I can do this...
[MUFFLED] Do what?
Gut that son of a bitch
who murdered my brother when I was in prison.
[Muffled] I don't follow you. I really don't ...ah.
Jimmy Timmy Beck. I can barely say that asshole's name.
It's easier if you drop the Timmy.
[ELECTRIC STATIC]
You know I'm here for you, Jimmy. You see, I was doing
a bid in McDougal for armed robbery when he snatched my
brother like he did the others. He brought him here to this very
place and he did things to him.
PETER: I used to love the bacon cheeseburgers at Sully's.
They're delicious.
They come with these fries, baked beans, and coleslaw.
Then they went out of business so I started going to Twain's.
They had this amazing French dip.
The portions were kinda small,
but it was worth it for the price.
EMMETT: You know, in this light you look just like him.
Are you kidding me?
Yeah.
Unh-unh. Unh-unh. Unh-unh.
Ugh.
PETER: Got used to going there and then, of course, they went
out of business too. So I started going to, uh, Du-Par's.
They had a really good, uh, beet salad that I liked.
[ELECTRICITY CRACKLING]
SHERYL: How sad is that?
She's still at it.
Wait a minute. Look at that.
DANIEL: Who's that guy?
I don't know. Maybe that asshole Bob from
the network she's always talking about.
He's probably in there commending her on her
work ethic. Man, she's got a real commitment to this show.
Wait. But if she's in there, who's messing with the fuse box?
EMMETT: Tonight, Jimmy Beck's soul has the power to cross over
into another living body at the exact moment of his death five
years ago today at precisely 6:66 p.m.
That's 7:06, you fucktard.
And with the proper incantation, his body can
enter our realm for exactly one hour. How do I know this, do you
ask? Well, I happen to meet a French Quarter voodoo priest
online who gave me the exact invocation for this very ritual
here. Yeah. Uh, I am totally rocking this whole spiritual
diversity thing. Some of this shit's gotta work, right?
SHERYL: What about the blood?
PETER: We gotta find out what's controlling these lights?
At this point, I don't care if that blood's
from a dismembered Labradoodle.
DANIEL: What's a Labradoodle?
It's like when a Labrador mates a Poodle,
or a Poodle mates a Labrador.
SHERYL: Mm-hmm.
I can't remember who has to be on top.
EMMETT: You know this
whole abbreviated serial killer thing has not been easy on me,
you know? Uh, I'm a nice guy, but I had to walk in his shoes
to get in the right frame of mind. First, I did the cat. I
fucking hate cats. Second,
I did that whiny little actor friend of yours. Uh, third,
I fucking raped the shit out of his goat.
Oh, fuck me. And last, last but not least,
I'm gonna be killing you.
LORRAINE: Me?
Yeah. Uh, you see
um, I want his spirit to enter a living body so I can
torment him like he did my brother. Yeah. I'm gonna slice
him. I'm gonna slice him from his throat all the way down to
his taint. I am gonna watch the life leave his eyes just like he
did my brother. He didn't deserve what he got.
He wasn't even a tranny.
You lost me.
Jimmy Timmy Beck only killed transvestite midget
circus clowns. You did not know this?
I'm shocked. Yeah. The fucking papers kept it quiet
because they didn't want to discourage the fucking precious
carnival from coming in every year, but, you know, still. I
don't know why he picked my brother. He wasn't even a midget
or a fucking clown for that matter.
Okay. Let me get this straight for one second.
You're gonna get a murderer's spirit to enter my
body for one hour; is that correct?
Yeah, that's correct.
Okay. And then you're gonna kill me, but you actually
think that you're killing the murderer's spirit that is in
my body; am I correct again?
Correct.
Okay. So listen to me. Why wouldn't you
have used, I don't know, let's say maybe the actor who looked
exactly like the murderer's spirit?
I'm not having sex with a guy.
What the fuck? You didn't say anything about sex.
Is this supposed to before or after you're gonna kill me?
Correct.
What? Oh, no. This has to be some sick fucking joke.
Shh. [MUFFLED SCREAMS]
PETER: Well, I guess that rules out a Labradoodle.
[DOOR CREAKS METAL CRASH]
[SCREAMING]
Revenge is hard to explain, it really is, okay?
It will be him, but it will be you, you know I
mean, I have spent the last six years in a men's prison, and...
and, and a woman with all of her working lady parts, it'll be a
nice change for me. I'm looking forward to it.
[MUFFLED] You fucking psychopath.
His body cannot enter this circle here. I will be
protected, and you on the other side, you're gonna die. Okay.
Uh, this is Viagra for my penis.
[ELECTRICAL FORCE FIELD]
That's the worst bug bite I've ever seen.
SHERYL: Mm-hmm.
Poor little actor guy.
Is he really, you know?
Dead? Either that or he's a really good actor.
Check his pulse.
[DARK DREARY CHIMES]
I don't feel anything.
That's not where his pulse is. It's over here.
Or maybe over here.
Find it?
This dude is dead.
[GURGLING AND SCREAM]
DANIEL: Hmm.
Maybe now he's dead.
LORRAINE: [Screaming]
EMMETT: [LAUGHING]
Uh...
Shit. Lorraine might really be in trouble in there.
Then we should run away, guys.
We should run far away right now. And get help.
Come on, Pete.
EMMETT: Come for me, Jimmy Timmy.
Come for me, Jimmy Timmy Beck.
Enter this physical vessel which I have
provided for you.
Welcome.
[DOOR RATTLES OPEN]
Whoo! Aah!
Beat me with a broom stick.
You have ruined my circle.
SHERYL: Get away.
Unh-unh.
Oh. Oh, hey
Pete, could you, like, man up here and do something, please?
Shit.
Technically that was something.
He's like a ninja.
You have ruined my fucking ritual. The spirit needs a body.
SHERYL: [SCREAMING]
DANIEL: [SCREAMING]
Oh, hey, we gotta go. We gotta get to the car. Hurry up.
No, no, no. The car doesn't work. He ripped...
he ripped the wires out.
SHERYL: What the hell is going on?
We have to get out now.
You're kind of dodging the question.
No, I'm dodging him!
Get over here! Ah!
[SCREAMING]
DANIEL: Ah, ah, ah, sir, sir.
Seriously, man, just take a pill.
No, no! No more pills. No more pills.
Which one of you pieces of shit murdered my brother? Hmm?
None of us! None of us, sir. We don't know
what you're talking about.
LORRAINE: Jimmy Beck. He's trying
to raise the spirit for an hour of sadomasochism and mutilation.
I want revenge on that motherfucker for what he did to
my brother Dale. He doesn't seem to be in any one of you though.
Well, you don't see us lining up for Ringling Brothers Circus,
do you?
What?
LORRAINE: Oh, yeah. Jimmy's victims were all cross-dressing
circus clowns under 5'7".
He killed poor little munchkins.
His spirit is out. I can feel it.
But why didn't it enter a body, hmm?
Sir, sir, we don't know, okay?
Back. Hey, hey, do me a favor. Just... just put down the knife.
Give... give Pete the knife.
Actually Sheryl's closer.
Hand Pete the knife. Hand Pete the knife. Hand Pete the knife.
Yeah. Hand Pete the knife.
Yeah. Aah!
The body, it has no choice but to enter
another one for one hour.
[EVIL LAUGH]
It's not supposed to go. Fucking Jimmy Timmy! Just...
[ELECTRIC MELTDOWN SOUND]
What the fuck are you doing? Get back! Stay back! Stay back!
Fuck why didn't it work?
Oh, Shit! Maybe I got this all wrong.
Maybe I got it all wrong.
[EVIL LAUGHTER]
I've done everything! I was waiting a year for this shit!
Maybe the spirit can't cross over into a living body.
Maybe it's gotta be fucking dead.
[HARD IMPACT PERCUSSION HIT] EMMET: Oh, fuck...
Oh, I have been waiting for this!
[GHASTLY SCREAMS]
[SHATTER SOUNDS]
Run! Hey, Mr. Dead Guy! Hey, hey, hey,
Mr. Dead Guy! Get his knife! Get his knife! Ahh!
JIMMY: I'm the one who does the gutting
around here, Emmett. And I'm gonna do you just like I did
your whiny little brother while he begged and begged,
Just the tip, Jimmy. Just the tip.
[GROANS]
[KNIFE STRIKE]
Oh, well, that was a bit extreme.
[GROANING]
What's with the whole last dying breath thing?
Ah! [SHOCK SCREAM]
Who's next? You?
Me?
But you look like the "cut my cock off and
grow a pair of tits type.
N... No, I don't.
Yeah, you do. You've got enough whore makeup on to be a clown.
Hah, I just use a little bronzer, that's it.
Hmm. And you're just a lying little bitch.
LORRAINE: Touché. JIMMY: Heh.
[SCREAMING]
LORRAINE: It isn't going to start! Keep going!
DANIEL: In hindsight, this probably wasn't a great idea.
SHERYL: Ugh, Taking this gig? Tell me about it.
God dammit, we're off the grid.
Can't even check Facebook.
Do you remember how far we are from town?
Like, what five miles? I don't remember.
(Laughing) We are not going out there. Hello? Stranger danger.
That's a good point. Probably a lot more
dangerous out there than in here with a possessed killer.
The devil you know, right?
Hey, maybe he can't leave the house.
[DISTANT DOOR SLAM]
[CRUNCHING OF LEAVES]
These boots weren't meant for running, Pete.
Okay. I think I have an idea.
PETER: Okay.
LORRAINE: So the evil spirit in that dead body has an hour time limit,
so the clock is ticking.
I kind of missed the whole origin story.
Just listen. All we have to do is hunker down and wait it out.
That makes sense. Actually, none of that makes sense.
Okay. So here's the plan. I'm gonna go hide in the dead cat
shed over there and you're gonna go get the camera.
phew, no. no. no, that... what?
Someone's gotta film this, Pete.
I mean, this is like the "Blair Witch Project" times twenty.
I mean, think about the money and the job security, Pete.
I'm thinking about not getting raped in the
ass and murdered by that thing back there.
I mean, we could probably get another job somewhere.
I don't see him. Maybe he followed Lorraine and Pete.
[LOUD CRASH OF TWISTED METAL]
[EXHALES] I held my breath for a full minute that time.
Whew. That is not bad for someone with asthma.
Oh, God, I don't believe this.
Huh, What?
Ugh, I just had a thought.
Lorraine said she'd give me that free spa weekend, right?
DANIEL: Mm-hmm.
But this new situation, does it change that? I mean, what
what if something happens to her? Do I still get the weekend?
It was a verbal agreement.
Hmm, great. So I'm gonna get screwed.
She better live, that's all I have to say.
No. No, no, no, no. Judge Judy would say that
it's legally binding. She...
she'd rule in your favor on that one.
[BRANCHES SNAPPING AND A DEEP GASP]
Please tell me that was you.
Unh-unh.
[SCREAMING]
[GOATS BLEATING]
LORRAINE: Hold still.
PETER: I am holding still.
[GOATS BLEATING]
The goat's over there. I don't want him to attack us.
Why would the goat attack us?
Wouldn't you be pissed off if you were fucked in the ass by
a crazy psycho killer?
[GOATS BLEATING]
I ain't afraid of no goats. Let's go.
[CHIMES AND MARIMBA]
I think we lost him.
Okay. What do we know about this Jimmy Beck ghost guy?
He was probably bullied a lot as a child,
maybe even some as a ghost. I don't know.
I bet no one went to his funeral
and that hurt his feelings and... and
caused him to become even more of a sicko freakish
psychotic killing machine.
No. I mean, why would he want to hurt us?
We're not his style. Think about it.
His issues are tranny clown midgets.
You have to say transgender little people.
Do you think Daniel and Sheryl are ok?
Ah, the universe protects idiots, Pete.
I would've cast the girl from the condom commercial,
but she didn't fucking call me back.
Uh, Lor... Lorraine?
I could get a film deal from this.
Even better, I could get a book deal from this.
I mean, this could probably put me back on the map.
Lorraine?
What? Where's the cat?
[DEAD MOANING CAT]
[TORTURED CAT]
Listen to me. We're not his demographic.
You're right. That's profiling 101.
I should've known that.
Mm.
This guy's breaking all the serial killer rules, Sheryl.
Do you want to stick around and tell him, Daniel?
Ahh!
Oh, ahh.
Okay, girl. Get it together.
You can do this. You take pilates twice a week.
You are Lorraine Taylor. You're gonna have a
major book deal from this.
[PETRIFIED CAT MEOWING]
Peter?
[PETRIFIED CAT MEOWING]
Huh!, Fucking zombie cat.
[PETRIFIED CAT SCREECHING]
This is why I'm a dog person.
[PETRIFIED CAT SCREECHING]
Hey! Ow!
Oh, Peter, thank God. I didn't know where you were.
You were worried about me?
You have the flashlight. I think I lost an earring.
Of course.
Thank you.
Where's Lorraine?
God!
Oh! Thank God!
Ah!
Hey! Oh, it's me.
Okay. Okay.
Hey, that label said "Willard," not "Prada."
So?
The boots are knock offs?
So what?
Judge Judy would call that copyright infringement.
Well, fuck Judge Judy and fuck you too, Daniel. And you know
what? Fuck you, fuck you, and fuck this fucking ghost. I don't
need approval from any of you people. Do you think you're
always gonna be in your 20s? Let me tell you a little story about
me when I was 20.
Not the youth squandered speech again.
We get it. You've had to compromise. You've made
mistakes, which leads us to your biggest one, the lookalike actor
you hired who now has a crazed ghost killer inside of him and
is currently chasing after us with a knife trying to kill us.
So we're going to suck it up and go hide in the dead cat shed.
By the way, the cat's not dead.
Little Mittens is alive and well?
Not really.
Yeah, he's undead, like Jimmy. Hell,
everything around here seems susceptible to being raised from
the dead after whatever black magic that douchebag screwed up.
But if everything can be raised...
That means not only the cat,
but those midget clowns he killed too.
[LIGHT CHIMES WITH GIGGLING]
Still, Why would they want to hurt us?
Yeah.
They... we didn't do anything to them.
Ow! [LAUGHTER OF MIDGETS]
Is anything here rational?
Ow!
Hey
Hey, you cocksucking clowns, stop throwing rocks right now!
Ow! Oww!! [MIDGET LAUGHTER]
Jesus!
[LAUGHTER]
I so hate this house.
[MIDGET DEMON LAUGHTER]
[SCARY DARK SOUND]
[MONSTER GROWL]
[WOODEN DOOR CREAKS]
[DOOR SLAMMING SOUND]
[DARK, SCARY CRESCENDO OF STRINGS]
[TROMBONE SQUELCH]
[CANDY BAR THUD]
[BLOOD TRICKLING SOUND]
Leaking all over my damn house.
[EXHALING] I held my breath another minute.
It seems to be my ceiling.
Number 10, Wilson Phillips, "Hold On."
Number nine, Kelly Clarkson, "Since You Been Gone."
Shh.
I'm sorry. I'm just really nervous, and I have to pee.
I really do.
So do I. We should've hit the bathroom.
I know. There's three of them in here and we can't use
any of them right now. One of my worst fears actually.
[CACOPHONY OF SOUNDS]
[WOOD DOOR CREAK]
[CRESCENDO OF STRINGS]
[DOOR RATTLES THEN THUD]
Do you think he left?
Yeah.
[CLASSICAL ROMANTIC MUSIC]
[SCREAMING]
Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater, had a girl but couldn't keep her.
[FOOT CLATTER]
[BONE SMASHING HIT]
We're not like those pussies on those other ghost shows.
Yeah. That's right. That's for
my ex-girlfriend, the whore, her pimp, and cock and balls.
Oh, yeah. Kill that dead motherfucker.
[BONE SOUND]
Now, that's an exorcism. Ew, you got brains on your top.
Ew.
Shit, Lorraine. Lorraine,
stay with me. We beat Beck, you hear me? Okay. We won.
You... you got it on film?
Yeah, we sure did.
Inappropriate, Pete.
Pete?
Yeah.
Is she...
Wait for it.
[SCREAMING]
Yeah, now, she's dead.
You sure? She tends to lie a lot, Pete.
There goes my spa weekend.
You gonna be okay?
Yeah.
You think you could put the toilet seat down for me,
because I really have to go.
Let's talk about this whole possession thing.
So the spirit doesn't go into the living,
it goes into the dead for an hour. And then when you
smash the dead dude's head, it leaves the body?
[TOILET FLUSHES]
Yeah, but then where does it go?
Because he's still got another 20 minutes left in this world
according to my watch.
Your turn.
Pardon me. [SCREAMING]
Ow!
Oh, my God, I'm so sorry, Lorraine.
Inappropriate, Pete.
Oh, you asshole! We were gonna have babies!
Lots and lots of babies.
Okay. Okay. It's done. Alright. Okay. Okay. Okay. It's done.
She's right. She's right, it's done. It's done.
Sheryl's right. It's done, buddy.
Damn, it's more blood and her hair.
I hope those aren't pubes. Ugh!
Okay. Okay. He's gone. He's gone. He's gone.
Jimmy's gotta be gone. Jimmy... Jimmy... Timmy is gone, right?
Right? There's no more. There's no more freshly killed people.
There's no more freshly killed people. That's it. That's it. We
just gotta walk back to town.
Are you sure about that?
EMMETT: I'm back.
The fuck.
SHERYL: Split up.
[DARK DREARY SYNTH]
I wish I had a weapon or a really big cup of holy water.
Oh hold on a second. We've been going about this all wrong.
We can't fight the spirit and win.
Yeah. Because we don't have a giant cup of holy water, I know.
No. We need the supernatural to fight the supernatural.
Yes. Yes. Like King Kong or Godzilla, exactly.
Or all those ghost clowns
he killed whose souls are out there. I've read enough scripts
to know what their souls need is redemption. I'm gonna get them
to fight for us. There's gotta be like, what,
12 of them, maybe more?
And don't forget about that cat.
Right. And the cat. They all must hate him for what he
did to them. Hmm. They're gonna take our side.
[GHASTLY GROANS AND MOANS]
Ghost clowns?
Ghostly alternative life style midget clowns?
I read somewhere that we only use like 10 percent of our brain? Which
means that we actually have all this psychic ability stored up
in like the other 70 percent. All I have to do is believe.
Come to me little people of the night and assist us in the fight
against the very spirit that put you in the ground.
[MIDGET LAUGHTER AND CIRCUS MUSIC]]
You did it, Sheryl, you're psychic.
You really... you did it!
Never underestimate the power of positive energy.
[MIDGET LAUGHTER]
[MIDGET MUCUS SPLATTER FOLLOWED BY LAUGHTER]
Oh. Oh.
Oh, my God. What is it? What is it? Ghost midget ectoplasm?
[LAUGHTER]
Bad clowns, very, very bad.
[LAUGHTER]
CLOWNS: Boobies!
Shhh... We don't want the crazy killer outside
the door to hear us.
[FOOTSTEPS IN THE HALLWAY]
[DOOR RATTLE]
EMMETT: Who's gonna be first? The pussy camera guy?
PETER: Shit!
If clowns burst through that door right now...
Shhhh...
[WOODEN DOOR CREAKS]
I'm sorry. I'm just really fucking terrified.
Do your countdown thing. Do your countdown thing, okay?
Okay.
I'll be right back.
You're leaving me?
I have to pee really bad.
Still?
I kinda got interrupted before.
Oh.
Just promise me you'll stay right here, okay? No matter
what, you stay right here. Just stay right here and I promise
I'll be back.
Okay.
[floor creaks]
Number six, Mariah Carey "Vision of Love."
[OMINOUS SOUNDS]
[Screaming] OW!
[GRUNTING]
Ow! Get off my titty!
Number five, Taylor Swift, "Shake it Off."
Shake it off.
[Screaming]
Number four, Lady Gaga, "Bad Romance."
I'm gonna fuck your face.
[PUNCH SOUNDS]
[GRUNTING]
[HEAVY BREATHING]
[CRICKETS] [FLOOR CREAKS]
[OMINOUS AMBIENCE]
SHERYL: Oh, God. Oh, my, God, Daniel.
Oh, God, Daniel. I'm so sorry.
You told me to stay. You made me promise.
[CAR SOUNDS OUTSIDE] [WOODEN RATTLING]
[SPOOKY PARANORMAL SOUNDS]
Fuck these spirits.
Oh, I'm gonna avenge you.
I'm gonna burn this place to the ground. The world will know
about the sacrifices you made here. Oh, they will.
Yes, they will. Yes, they will.
[gasping] [exhales]
I held my breath for way over a minute that time, Sheryl.
Way over a minute.
EMMETT: I am going to shoehorn your
asshole wide open, motherfucker.
[GRUNTING AND SCREAMING]
Get off me!
[CUCKOO CLOCK GOES OFF]
PETER: Wait!
[knocking]
It's me, Pete.
We can't risk it.
Open the door!
[WIND WHISTLES]
This is karma for not picking up your dad.
PETER: What?
Open the door, please. Open the door. Please open the door.
Please open the door. [SCREAMING]
[KNOCKING] Hey. Just, uh, just...- Hey.
A hallucination.
Asshole. Fuck you.
[SCREAMING]
[THUMP]
[HYSTERICAL SCREAMING]
He did just buy us some time.
[Gagging sounds]
What the fuck are you doing, pervert?
Oh, wait. We can't leave him.
DANIEL: What? You just locked him out.
I know, I panicked.
PETER: What are you doing with my nipple? Ah!
Get off our cameraman!
DANIEL: You want to grab tits, asshole? Grab this.
Oh, shit.
EMMETT: Stronger reflexes in this body.
DANIEL: Oh, shit!
EMMETT: No one leaves. SHERYL: Hang on.
DANIEL: Hurry! Hurry!
[Screaming]
DANIEL: Oh, get in! Get in, Pete! Get in!
SHERYL: Oh, no, you're messing it up!
PETER: I'm sorry!
Pete, you gotta get in the circle.
Ah!
DANIEL: Get in the circle.
PETER: You think I don't want to?
[SCREAMING]
[RELIEVED LAUGHTER]
SHERYL: Oh my god. I think it worked. He can't get in.
DANIEL: Yeah, you can't get in, dickhead.
[Screaming]
SHERYL: We're safe inside the circle. We just have to wait it out.
How long? Two minutes.
SHERYL: What's he doing?
DANIEL: I don't know. Sheryl? Sheryl? Sheryl?
I don't know.
Sheryl? Sheryl? Sheryl? Sheryl?
[Screaming] Ah! Ah! Ah!
He's in.
But not the spirit. See?
DANIEL: He messed up. He messed up. Yeah, he's messed up.
There's no more dead bodies for him to slide into.
[LAUGHING]
PETER: Quit fooling around dickhead. Your titty twisting days are
done.
[FOOTSTEPS]
[DOOR RATTLING]
Oh, God.
Who's that?
[GASPING AS DOOR CREAKS OPEN]
I didn't get paid.
PETER: Where did you come from?
I came in a few minutes ago to check up on y'all.
Had some chest pains.
DANIEL: Victim Stan, we don't have a ride back to town, sir.
Would you mind giving us a lift?
Hmm. Not at all.
Yeah. And also, there might have been a few unexplained deaths on
and about the premises.
Oh. You don't say.
Maybe we can get the murder tours going again.
Yeah, maybe.
If it works out in your favor, why not, sir?
And Stan, about your cat, sir, um-
How do I put it?
PETER: Pretty dead.
DANIEL: Yeah.
SHERYL: Yeah.
Sorry.
And it's such a shame about Fluffy because he was such
a kind, warm-spirited kitten.
Yeah.
Fluffy, yeah. Damn fine kitty.
How are we gonna explain this to the police?
You don't intend on letting us get to the police,
do you, Jimmy?
[maniacal laughing]
What gave me away?
The kitten's name was Mittens, not Fluffy.
And, uh, Stan really loved his pussy.
Let me tell you a little story about your friend, Stan.
When saw his dead little pussy, he had himself a heart attack
Fell out right there.
I saw an in, and I took it.
You two would make really good investigators in
real life. Just saying.
STAN: Shut up!
It's time to pick up where I-
[GUN CLICKS]
left off.
Get your asses outside! Now!
I said, move. Look tits.
Get outside. Get out there! Turn around.
Keep it moving. Don't look at me! Follow him.
Hands on his shoulders. Get in line.
[CRICKETS]
SHERYL: Ahh!
PETE: Okay. Okay, okay, okay. STAN: Get over there.
STAN: What's the matter?
♪ EVIL MUSIC ♪
[MUMBLING]
PETER: Unh-unh. Unh-unh. Unh-unh. Unh-unh. Unh-unh.
STAN: Get your asses down those stairs.
I said now! Get!
Are you sure...
STAN: Down! DANIEL: Okay.
♪ PARANORMAL X-FILES MUSIC ♪
Maybe we should settle this over a game of flashlight tag.
SHERYL: Oh, yeah. I used to love that game. Didn't you, Pete?
This isn't really the time to reminisce.
Pete, wouldn't you like to play a game of
flashlight tag with him? With your flashlight?
Right now.
Yes. I would love to play flashlight tag,
as long as I'm not it. Ah!
SHERYL: Those damn energy drinks.
Move.
Oh!
Move.
SHERYL: Wasn't there a time limit to being in this world?
STAN: You botched the ritual earlier. There are no time
restraints anymore.
DANIEL: Where you taking us, Jimmy?
STAN: To where I bury the bodies.
[EERIE WINDY AMBIENCE]
SHERYL: You want us to see for ourselves, don't you?
You're wracked with guilt, and if you take us to the spot,
you'll feel some sense of closure, right?
There is no motive other than I intend
to cut your eyes out and slice out your tongue.
Can't you just shoot just like you did Pete?
Don't worry, I'll be entering him soon enough.
DANIEL: Uh, for the record, that means, uh...
STAN: Turn around.
On your knees.
[laughing]
I got an idea. Let's start with your mouth
first because it's so pretty.
Um, are you thinking the knife or the gun?
Because I have a severe phobia to both of those.
I can't let evil win. I can't let evil win. I have to believe.
I have to believe. I do believe.
I really don't like anything in my mouth.
I command all you restless spirits to come to
the aid of me and my friend. Come to us now and protect us
against this demon-infested fiend. [GUST OF WIND]
STAN: What are you doing?
It's working, Sheryl. It's working. You're talking to
the dead. Keep going.
That's enough out of you!
SHERYL: Come to us now. Come and take away the evil that
has taken your souls and wants to take more.
[GUST OF WIND]
Ah! [CROWS GAWKING]
Get away.
Come now. It is time for your redemption. It is time for you
to take your revenge.
[FAINT LAUGHTER] No! No! Ah!
NO! OH! OH! [INTENSIFIED LAUGHTER]
[ZAP]
DANIEL: Holy shit!
Holy shit, Sheryl, you did it!
You did it!
SHERYL: Oh, oh, my God.
That's the power of positive energy.
Let's figure out how to get the hell out of here.
SHERYL: Oh, Stan's car! Maybe there's keys in it.
PETER: Hey! You guys were gonna leave me?
SHERYL: Our bad.
Shotgun.
My camera.
Hey, I gotta get my camera. Hey, don't leave me!
I'm fucking serious. Don't fucking Leave me here.
[DRAMATIC SOUND EFFECT]
Go! Go!
So what happened?
Oh, Sheryl was great. She was great. She used her psychic
powers and she summoned the supernatural.
What?
Let's just say we had a little help from the other side.
Lorraine was there for us.
What, really?
Oh, wow. How did she look?
Inappropriate, Pete.
What, I'm... I'm... I'm sorry, okay? I liked her.
There, I said it.
I know.
Uh, weren't the house lights on a second ago?
♪ SUSPICIOUS MUSIC ♪
You always have to notice everything, Pete.
Yeah. Can you just stop recording for like a minute just
so we can, you know, get out of here?
Yeah.
PETER: Uh, not yet. Look.
DANIEL: Oh, what the hell?
[ENGINE REVVING]
[BRAKES SQUEAL]
DANIEL: Hell yes. Hell yes!
Yeah. You got that zombie cat.
Actually, no. That was just a regular cat.
You guys didn't notice the different color or that it was a
little bit bigger, and that it wasn't all bloody and half
mangled?
[CRICKETS]
♪ UPBEAT CHEERFUL MUSIC ♪
SHERYL: I got service.
PETER: Yes! 911 right now. Tell them we're coming in hot. Gunshot.
Male.
♪ MUSIC CONTINUES ♪
I got our next show for the network right here. Aw yeah!
Beat me with a broomstick. We are gonna be famous.
♪ MUSIC CONTINUES ♪
[SCREAMING]
♪ SPOOKY PIANO MUSIC ♪
Subtitles by explosiveskull