When did it start?
When did anything start?
Nothing can ever just go away.
Not in this universe.
A man lives.
A man dies.
He rots. He becomes dirt.
He becomes trees. He burns and becomes gas.
He becomes clouds. He becomes rain.
He becomes trees. He becomes fruit.
He feeds men who die and become dirt.
It's a meaningless cycle of birth and death.
Unless you find something or someone to give you purpose.
For me, it was Cassandra.
I see her for the first time.
She is dressed in black.
I think I can't hit on her, this is a funeral.
We go out that night for drinks.
I try to kiss her, and she turns away,
telling me she promised
she would never kiss a boy who was drunk.
I ask her whether she would ever have sex with one.
She says no.
I don't sleep that night, thinking about her.
I try to remember how long I have to wait before I can call her.
She calls me the next day.
We make love for the first time.
It is awkward, and I'm so nervous I have trouble.
She says it's okay.
That we will have plenty of time.
That it will get better.
In five years, seven months and eleven days, she will leave me.
Everything happens for a reason.
I wonder what Bill is going to think when he sees this.
That I've written my story editor into my story.
Nah.
The beginning of a story is the most important part.
You write a good beginning and...
you have a chance that people will stick with you throughout the whole thing.
A... shitty beginning and...
I was so desperate for inspiration
I Googled the word "philosophy" today.
There were 138 million hits.
There are 6.7 billion people in this world.
That means that theoretically, there could be
a unique philosophy for about every 50 people.
You have a philosophy.
-Do I? -You wanna hear the one I made up?
Jacob: What if we're all standing
on either side of a giant scale?
If we're all born with an antithesis.
Someone who's our exact opposite.
Maybe not in terms of, like, personality
but in a more metaphysical sense.
But for that to work, wouldn't it mean that
half of the world would be miserable
and the other half really, really happy?
I, I knew you would say that.
Now, you've gotta consider how many people are
out-of-their-fucking-minds happy
and how many people are truly miserable.
It all balances out.
Unless something extraordinary happens to somebody.
That's, uh-- That's rare though.
Mostly it's these little victories.
Little defeats.
My theory is, when we're getting shit on,
just mildly shit on or really, really dumped on,
the exact opposite is happening to our opposite.
Do you get it?
I think so.
What do you think?
I like it.
What would you do if a genie appeared here?
The way they do in stories.
And you had three wishes.
What would your wishes be?
I don't know.
Never really thought about it.
What about you?
My first wish would be...
that she would just come back.
And the other two?
Jacob narrating: I could feel everything I felt,
but I can't change it.
A ghost looking over my own shoulder.
If time is a great city, then all the streets are one-way.
Otherwise, we'd all be heading back.
Not to the beginning but to the point in time
when we made the wrong turn.
The turn that changed everything.
Knock, knock?
-Hey, um, what are you-- -Hi.
You're, uh, here for lunch.
Yeah. Oh, how do you feel about hotdogs?
Get me out of here, please.
All right, I've been thinking.
I want you to quit.
Quit what?
I want you to quit working at JBL.
Sounds good.
I'm serious.
Well, babe, I just...
finished telling you I'm worried about our finances,
and you respond by telling me I should quit my job.
I'm not sure that's the way to get us out of debt, lover.
This isn't about that.
-Oh, it's not? -No.
This job is killing you.
-Babe, I'm not quitting. -Why?
I couldn't do that to you.
And how is working at this job helping?
I'm sorry, you keep making what you're making,
and it'll take years to pay everything off.
You have a gift, Jacob.
I don't want to see you spending another day at this place,
squandering it.
We wouldn't be able to survive.
We could make it work.
Uh, I'm, uh, I'm getting a second job.
No.
-No, no, absolutely not. -Yeah.
-No. End of conversation. -No, wait a second.
I'm getting a second job waiting tables, okay.
What kind of man would I be if I let you do that?
No, it has nothing to do with letting me do anything.
I've thought about. I wanna do it.
And it's not like you'd just be lying around all day.
You know, I would expect a lot from you.
-Oh yeah? -Yeah.
Yeah, you would have to write your ass off.
Seriously, like, write like you've never written before.
Oh God!
Hey, and when you make it...
and you will make it, you just need the energy
to focus, that's it.
And when you do, then you can, uh,
pay me back for all my extra hours.
I don't know if it is possible I could love you more.
Jacob narrating: There is a subway in L.A.,
even though hardly anybody knows about it.
We used to ride it downtown to watch the Lakers.
There was an old man on the train.
I asked him what the true meaning was
of the word "love."
He turned to me and he said...
Old man: Love is when you can jerk off to thoughts
of the person you're with.
Jacob narrating: But Cassandra was more than that.
She was my muse.
Everything I wrote was about her.
Everything I write will always be about her in some way.
Is there anything else I can get you?
No.
Okay.
Jacob narrating: I'm never going to forgive myself for this.
Now I think about it, I'm writing about myself
writing about myself writing.
"And in she walked."
Man: Oh, shit!
Yeah.
Is that...
Yeah.
Jacob narrating: You live in L.A.,
you hear about this happening all the time.
But Cindy O'Hare.
She's so famous, other famous people
are starstruck around her.
Like Madonna.
And...there she is.
I could just walk up to her.
I could tell her she was my first love.
I've seen everything she's ever done.
Even the early avant garde stuff nobody liked,
when she had that awful hairdo.
I used to watch them with the sound off
and write my own dialog.
I'm losing track of where you end,
where the memories of you begin.
When did I ever stop thinking about you
in the present tense?
Hi.
I'm a huge fan. Is there any way you could...
-Oh yeah. -...sign that for me?
Yeah, yeah.
What do you do in this situation?
Y-Y-You leave her alone, right? Let her enjoy her coffee
like a normal person.
-Thank you so much. -No problem.
But what if...
Hey.
Hi.
Do I know you?
You look familiar.
Funny. I was just gonna say exactly the same thing to you.
Uh, that was a joke, right?
Oh, my God, that would be so humiliating
if you were being serious.
-Of course it was a joke. -Oh! Whew!
Do I look like I live under a rock?
Eh, it's hard to say.
How can I help you?
I, um--
-I read in a magazine once... -Uh-huh.
...you were doing this interview, and...
you said, "I just want a normal guy.
"I'm sick of all these Hollywood types.
"It's tough because of who I am, people are intimidated by me.
It's hard for me to find a date."
-Something like that. -Yeah.
Now even though you are this uber-famous,
uber-hot actress, you have trouble meeting men.
I am so mortified right now.
Well...
were you bullshitting or what?
Were you for real?
Or just trying to sound cool and down-to-earth?
I was serious.
Well...
my name is Jacob Silver.
Too mundane.
Hey.
What if I focused all my intensity into one word?
What if I funneled all my passion into a single phrase?
What if I summoned every ounce of energy
into my soul and just overwhelmed her with my being?
Hi.
Too weird. Too subtle.
People don't like subtle these days.
They need something big.
So I wanted to tell you
-I'm a really big fan of yours. -Oh.
I really respect you as an actress.
Not that my opinion means much to you probably,
but you inspire me as an artist.
-Oh, my God. -Holy shit.
Hey, if you're smart, you should open the register.
Nobody move!
I just want the cash in the register,
and I want wallets on the table.
If y'all cooperate,
I'll be gone.
You'll be back enjoying your coffee.
Nobody--
Holy shit.
Cindy O'Hare.
-No bodyguards? -Please, please, please!
-Please. -Stand up.
Okay. All right. Here.
-You can take my purse-- -What the fuck do I need a purse for?
Do I look like a guy who needs a purse?
Please just take my money.
What do you do in this situation?
What kind of world is it when a man like this
-would hurt a girl like her? -Please don't hurt me--
No, I think you're gonna come with me.
Somebody call an ambulance.
Oh, my God. Are you okay?
I don't think so.
You saved my life.
And you ruined mine...
so it goes.
Oh, my God. Somebody help!
-You saved my life. -No.
No, no, no, a-anybody would have done it.
I-I was just closest. I--
No, that was the bravest thing I've ever seen.
You really want to thank me?
Huh?
Kiss me.
What?
If I live, then at least I get to tell everyone
I got to kiss Cindy O'Hare.
And all I had to do was get shot in the gut.
Oh.
If I die...
then at least let the last thing I feel be
a beautiful woman's lips touching mine.
Too ridiculous.
No, the best thing is realism.
Even if people don't like it,
they can't fault it if it's real.
I am alive at every moment I ever was
and ever will be.
Everything in my life is happening now, somehow.
Somewhere.
She is still here somehow.
Somewhere.
We are still together somehow in some different when.
I wonder if that other me, the one who still has her,
is aware of this other me,
who is alone,
the way I am aware of him.
Everyone I have ever known,
even the people I've forgotten,
are still here with me, somewhere.
Imperfect souls, depending on how I feel.
A king one day, a beggar the next.
The beauty of fiction.
-Hi. -Hey.
They say there isn't anything more powerful than nostalgia.
That you will always remember the good times.
How's it going?
That you will always fall into that human trap
of wanting to be elsewhere...
of failing to appreciate where you are now,
until you're gone.
Those were the good times.
Congratulations, Jacob.
This is a big deal.
Cass, I just got out of the publisher's, the meeting, and, uh...
Well, I know you're working right now, but...
Jacob narrating: It's easy to get lost in it.
Writing books, talking to agents, talking to publishers.
Getting rejected again and again.
Revising. Editing. Outlining.
When the words you are writing are what are gonna pay the rent,
when the little black letters on a white screen are
what are feeding your family, you won't fail.
You can't fail. It's your most basic instinct.
It's gonna be okay.
What's this?
I have something to show you.
Okay.
What do you wanna show me?
Holy crap.
That's so funny.
Those were my exact words when I saw it.
You wanna celebrate?
Yeah.
-No,I've changed my mind. -Oh, come on!
-No, I'm sorry. -No, it's too late. It's too late.
Oh God!
I'm so embarrassed.
They said there was no one here.
Come on. All right, just do what I do.
Yeah, well, I, I can't do what you do.
-All right. -Okay.
Here, warm it up.
Feel the music.
Wow.
Not so bad.
Tell me when it's all over.
-Right here. -Okay.
Now you can look...
What's this?
No. No, no.
It's our car.
-Really? -Yeah.
Get it.
What?
Does this work?
Jacob narrating: The most basic instinct of humans is to survive.
Not in a tooth-and-nail way, but in a broader sense.
To be wealthy. To be safe.
To be fat and happy. To bear children.
To ensure their loved ones are looked after.
We do every manner of work to try to gain this.
We sell stories.
Hi.
My, uh, my vehicle broke down.
I don't suppose you could give me a ride to Palmdale?
Uh, what's wrong with your car?
I don't know much about cars.
Uh, I could give you a ride to the callbox, if you want.
Hey, what's the matter, sweetheart?
What, you, uh, you scared I might be some ax-murderer?
Pfft.
No, no, of course not.
I promise not to bite.
Hey, you can, uh, you can search me for weapons, if you want to.
No. No, no, it's fine.
Of course it's fine! Uh, get in.
All right, thank you.
Uh, I'm headed up to Lancaster anyway.
All right. Beautiful.
My name's Chelsea.
Jacob.
So many of them, huh?
Oh, yeah.
I was just thinking the same thing.
Oh yeah?
What is it?
It's nothing.
-Are you all right? -Yes, I'm fine.
What, so we're just done talking then?
I was, uh--
I was gonna tell you something,
but now I think it's too weird.
I don't know...
I like weird.
Well, I, uh--
-Before I picked you up, I was lying in my car. -Uh-huh.
I was just staring up at the stars.
And this one star, it caught my eye.
What part of the sky was it in?
I-- Uh-- It all kinda looks the same to me.
-I-- -Yeah.
God. I-I can't tell you this.
You're...
gonna think that I'm crazy.
Please, I like this story.
I promise not to interrupt again, okay?
Well, um...
there was something about this star.
I felt like it was important.
Something that was this flash of light. And then it was gone!
And then, there was this really loud sound,
like, uh, a bunch of voices all screaming at the same time.
Now you definitely think I'm crazy.
You want me to, like, let you out or something?
No. No, I don't think you're crazy at all.
Jesus!
It's time to die.
What the fuck?
What is-- What is this?
You-You can take whatever you want.
There-There's cash in my wallet. You want--
-You want my car? It's a nice car. -No.
God, this is always much harder on unenlightened worlds.
What?
Maybe I'm just getting softer with age, you know.
A thousand years on the job becomes such a grind.
All right, you are going to die, little Earthman Jacob,
because you saw something you weren't supposed to see.
Wha-- What?
The end of Aurora.
-Aur-Aur-Aurora? -Yes.
Oh, don't play dumb. You just told me the entire story.
What?
-The disappearing star-- -That was nothing.
That was my imagination. It was a dream.
This is-- This is still a dream.
This is still a dream.
This is real.
Who-- Who are you?
I work for an organization that watches from behind the stars.
And you...were looking up at the wrong part of the sky
at the wrong time.
Whatever this is, whatever this really is,
you do not have to kill me.
Whatever you think I saw, it doesn't matter.
Nobody will believe me. Nobody will care.
Believe me, this is not my idea of fun.
Coming out here in the middle of nowhere, short notice.
Got a fucking thousand other things to do.
Please don't.
I have a f--
A what?
Girl.
Maybe you should close your eyes.
No.
If I die, then...
at least let the last thing I see be a beautiful girl.
Don't do that.
There's nothing I can do, is there?
Nothing I can say to stop you.
Goodbye, lover.
Maybe we'll meet again someday...
you know.
Nothing ever goes away, after all.
Hey, maybe we'll be trees together.
In our forest.
Do you remember our forest?
Hey.
What are you doing?
I'm reading.
What are you, uh...
It's...
Jacob narrating: Beautiful.
That's what she was gonna say.
Sweetheart, you know I don't like surprises.
Yeah, well, I, uh...
I think you're gonna like this one.
I gotta get back to work.
Babe, we are almost there.
What are we doing here?
See that house?
Yeah, it's our dream house.
-We always said that-- -When we were rich, right?
Yeah.
Well...
-What? -...it's our house now.
-What? -Yeah.
-Come on. -No. Seriously?
Are you serious? Are you fucking serious?
Oh, it's so pretty.
Come on.
Every moment that has ever been
still exists somehow.
Somewhere.
I am there in that moment.
I am still there,
lying in that quiet, empty house
before we had our bed shipped in.
I can still feel the hardwood floors pressing against my back
through the sleeping bag.
I can still smell the fragrance
from that herbal shampoo she used to use.
Nothing in the universe can ever go away.
Never pull a true vanishing act.
But what about thought?
Can you ever truly erase something from your memories?
My flight...
Oh, shit!
-Hey! -Sorry, there was so much traffic.
-So glad I didn't miss you. -I know, me too.
Are you so excited? New York City, I can't believe it.
Yeah, I just can't believe how last-minute this is.
Yeah, but you're going to be on TV. So who cares.
Yeah, I know, but I promised
I was gonna be around this weekend.
-We-- -I know, I know, but hey,
this is what you've been working towards, okay.
This is...huge.
I can hardly believe it myself.
Look, I gotta go, but I'll, uh--
-I love you so much. -Um-- Yeah.
I promise I'm going to marry you someday.
Okay. You promise?
-Yeah. Promise. -All right.
Bye.
Every moment that has ever been
still exists somehow.
Somewhere.
I am there in that moment with myself.
Come on, girl, let's get some work done.
Let's see what you got.
Hey, uh, hey, Ralph.
Oh, hey, Jake.
Who's that?
Oh, that's Warrior right there. That's Warrior.
Ah. How's, uh, how's things?
It's good, you know. It's good. I think things are--
-Things are good. -Yeah, how is, uh...
think it was, um...
Sherry. Name's Sherry.
She's not around anymore, you know.
Oh.
Anyone new?
What, your next book's gonna be my fucking biography?
Kidding, man. You know, it's like,
ask me next week, or...
next day, I'm sure there'll be somebody, you know.
Pretty sure.
Hey, I-I-I've been meaning to ask, um...
w-w-what's up with all the dogs?
What about them?
It seems like you have a different dog every week.
Yeah?
Cassandra and I, we were--
Well, um...
we were, uh, were swapping theories,
and she thinks you, uh,
you tire of them, you have--
you trade them in, you got some sort of thing worked out
with the local shelter or...
That's the best you guys come up with?
I'm a fucking dog-walker, man.
I walk dogs for rich people, you know.
Nice to them when they're out of town,
let them take shits. It's a good--
It's a good job, you know. I like it.
Well, so that's it, huh?
Yeah. Yeah, that's it.
Sorry to disappoint.
How's, uh...
how's Cassandra? Is she good?
-She's good. She's good. -Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Well...
uh, she's all right.
I don't like the sound of that, buddy.
No, no, no. She's, uh... she's good. Yeah.
I think she's miserable though.
-She doesn't seem miserable to me. -No.
I think she hides it.
Well, you would know. I mean...
You think I would?
Yeah.
It's just--
I-I-I don't think this is her scene.
This city...
living in L.A.
This world I'm in, writing.
Agents and publishers and press...
Look, buddy, seems to me like you don't deserve her.
You think so?
No. I just think you want your cake and be able to fuck it, too.
I mean, as the saying goes, that's what you want.
No, I-I feel I am big enough.
-I feel like it's-- -Doesn't matter what you feel.
Maybe you're right.
Of course I'm fucking right.
Now, can we get on?
Warrior got to take a shit somewhere, you know.
Yeah, yeah. See you-- See you later, man.
In the alternate universe,
the one I know exists somewhere,
I am not bound by my identity.
Not limited by the choices I've made.
I can be any one of those people I knew or didn't know.
Take all of their best qualities, none of their worst.
I could be Ralph. Ralph's so cool.
She always liked Ralph. She thought he was cute.
Come here.
Oh, boy.
Warrior!
Warrior! Come here please!
Warrior!
Mom!
Don't worry.
Just hope that they can afford it.
My goodness!
I think I have.
Oh, uh, yes, yes, ma'am. M-My name is Ralph.
I, uh--
Well, I think I found your dog.
What, they found Warrior?
Okay, come on.
That's it.
Surprise!
-Go on! -Hi, baby!
-Thank you. -Yeah.
-Thank you so much. Thank you. -Yeah.
-Thank you. -Uh...
Hey, hey.
No, whether you want it or not, I'm giving it to you.
Family.
-Thank you so much. -Yeah.
Thank you.
Okay, bye.
There isnothing in the universe worth anything
except a mystery.
And nothing is ever as enticing once you know it.
You cannot ever truly enjoy a story you yourself wrote.
It's the uncertainty of life that makes it compelling.
It's, it's exciting. You have to get this publicist.
-They're quite expensive, but I think it's worth it. -Hello.
-Oh, hey. Have you met... -Sorry to interrupt.
Hi.
Yes.
You know, it's really--
The one that you, that you meant--
I-I would like to expand this conversation.
-Um... -Yes.
Okay, I got-- I gotta go.
All right, bye.
-Hey. -Hi.
Who-Who's that?
Uh, it was n-nobody.
Come-- Come join us.
Thank you.
Jacob narrating: If only I can be him.
The man called nobody.
Hi.
You okay?
Huh.
Yeah.
Wonderful.
Is there any way I can help?
Hmm?
What?
Hmm?
Got it.
Got what?
Nobody is always someone.
I'm in that other universe,
where reality and fiction blend.
I become him, and he is me.
Hey!
Hey, man.
Come over here when you got a minute.
Got something I wanna chat about.
Did I mention I'm fucking Ralph's wife.
I think somebody's fucking my wife.
What? Uh--
What makes you think that?
Intuition, I guess.
Sixth sense maybe, even a seventh.
-Seems pretty reliable. -It is.
When you're that fucking close to somebody,
there's nothing you can hide, you know.
I mean, the smile is a little bit different, you know, the way they exhale,
and you just know there's something fucking going on. You just fucking know it.
So she, she breathes wrong, and you think she's cheating on you.
Maybe she's got allergies.
Like I said, man, I know.
Never been surer of anything in my whole life.
Theoretically, I mean, if you're right,
if, then, uh, well...
Who do you think it is? This-this guy or girl,
I guess.
I honestly have no idea.
-How long do you think it's been going on? -Six months.
Maybe longer. Six months at least. Yeah.
Six months.
Well, if you're right, then, uh--
Shit, I'm...
I'm really sorry, man.
No, no. I mean, it's not your fault,
you know, I mean...
you didn't do anything.
But I need to ask you something, you know.
I need to ask you a favor.
You're gonna think it's fucking weird, you know? But that's okay.
Just-- just-- I need you to do this.
-Hey, sure. Sure. What do you need? -You know?
I need you to spy on her for me.
What?
Okay, you don't have to do it, you know.
I know it's fucking weird. You know, just forget I even asked.
You know, it's not a big deal.
Just forget I even asked. It's not a-- It's nothing, you know.
I'll pay you, man.
I'll give you $1000. I'll give you a grand.
Even if you don't get anything. Just for trying.
I'll pay you for trying.
And what if she's not?
Not what?
-Cheating. -She is.
Okay, but look, look, look.
I'm not wrong. But if there's a possibility that I'm wrong...
and she's not, well then...
at least I'd know, you know.
But I gotta tell you, if I find out she's cheating,
it would rip my heart out, you know.
It would devastate me.
But at least then I'd have answers.
It's not knowing that just really--
It's like an act, you know.
I hate not being able to act, you know.
Just rip my fucking insides out.
So what do you say?
Neighbor?
-Why don't you just do it? -I can't do it.
She'll recognize my car.
But you're perfect.
She's never going to assume anything with you.
I'll arrange everything. I'll plan it all.
Okay? And I'll pay you in advance, man.
I got cash in the house. I can go get cash right now.
What if she notices me following her?
She's not going to notice you following.
Carli's a shit driver, man.
She's not gonna check her mirrors.
You're gonna be fine.
I'll do it. Yeah, I'll do it.
-I always wanted to be a spy. -That's good, that's good.
That's good. I like that. That's good.
-Thank you, man. -Yeah. When?
-When do you want me to do it? -Now.
-You need to do this now. -Now?
Yeah. Go.
Carli [laughing]: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
He wants you to spy on me?
You know, he's convinced you're cheating on him.
Hmm.
What did you say?
Huh?
I said I'd do it.
You wh--
You what?
Yeah, I have a plan.
Oh God.
You and your ideas.
You-You don't understand, Carli. He really loves you. He--
You didn't have to see his face when he was telling me.
He looked like he was dying.
I'm afraid if he found out about us,
he'll do something drastic.
I don't know, divorce you or...
try to hurt you or something.
Or hurt himself. Put a gun in his mouth.
I can't be part of something like that.
No, he's not like that.
Hmm.
Well...
...this is what I think we're gonna do.
-What? -I'm gonna spy on you.
Oh, my God.
Like he wants me to. Only, you won't go into, like...
a guy's house or anything.
You'll go somewhere else. You'll go somewhere
that if he saw you going, it wouldn't hurt him,
but which you'd still want to hide. I don't know, a...
a casino or something or...
maybe even buy some drugs. See...
I don't think he necessarily knows you're cheating on him.
I think he just knows you're hiding something.
I think-- I think we could set it up,
make it seem bad enough, like you're scoring
crack or something.
'Cause even that wouldn't hurt him the way it would
-if he found out you were cheating on him. -Hmm.
He'd understand, you know, he'd--
He'd help you work it out.
Mmm, I-I don't know.
It's a perfect plan.
I don't know if that's the word I would use to describe it.
No. I've got it all worked out.
Yeah, I can see that.
Hey, let me ask you something, huh?
Mmm.
Okay.
Let's say...
your perfect plan works, huh?
Let's say we go through with it.
Well, what then?
What do you mean?
I mean, are we done then?
You and I?
Wouldn't you want us to be?
No.
No, I'd rather just tell him the truth.
I would leave him.
Don't say that.
All right. Well, it's true.
What happened with you two?
I don't know, we're just different.
We want different things, you know.
He was already in love before we got together.
What?
I'm not his first love, right.
-Or, or his greatest. -I'm sure you are.
Some people were put on this planet for a reason.
Some people have a purpose
and if they get distracted from that purpose...
there's nothing sadder.
Right? Seeing someone old and gray just...
wishing that they had done what they were passionate about.
And...
I'm not his purpose.
He wasn't put on this planet to love me.
And yeah, I love him, and I--
I wanna stay.
But...
there are things he has to do. There are things that he is...
fucking good at doing.
And I worry that if I stay, he won't.
Oh.
Okay. All right.
When do you want to go through with your little plan, huh?
Hmm?
He's leaving in three days for Salt Lake City.
Hmm.
He'll be gone a week.
Okay.
Ready?
-Yeah! -All right.
Now come outside.
Fuck!
Hey. No, wait. Wait a minute!
-What? -Hang on.
My camera's broken.
-What? -Fucking camera's broke.
Let me see it.
Oy!
-Lens cap. -Oh. Of course.
Ooh, what now?
Go back inside, do it again.
-Oh! -No big deal. Only this time...
just, uh, act like you don't notice me.
You were kinda smiling in that last take.
-No, I wasn't. -Gotta look natural.
Okay.
There she goes.
Look at the ass.
Here she comes.
Huh.
Looking good.
Those tits and ass.
Oh, good.
Huh.
Wait, hold on.
What the fuck!
Here we go.
At this pretty liquor store.
And who do we have here?
Looking good.
Oh yeah!
Pretty.
See,
there's nothing to worry about.
She's an alcoholic.
And you thought she's cheating on you.
It's all in your mind.
I made you lunch.
What's the saddest thing you've ever seen?
Uh...
I haven't really thought about it. You?
It was on the news.
Mm-hmm.
Funny thing though.
It wasn't like the war or...
some missing child or anything like that.
What was it?
It was a story about a whale.
A whale.
It was a baby whale.
He was lost off the coast of Australia,
and he had somehow come across this yacht
he thought was his mom.
He kept on trying to, you know,
suckle from the side of this boat.
But all the people on the boat were watching him
and they felt bad, but what could they do?
They tried to sail away, but he kept following them.
And I just kept thinking what that poor whale must have thought,
wondering why his mom had suddenly turned so quiet
and so cold.
You really need to get over this.
Thanks a lot. That--
That is really sage advice.
Well, blame yourself.
You're the one writing the words I'm saying.
You're right.
No. Really, you are. You--
It's just...
so horrible.
I'm so lost.
This story doesn't make any sense.
It's like what you said before.
Realism.
If all else fails, just...
go, go back to what really happened.
That's always your defense.
If somebody doesn't like it, you just say, "Pfft.
Well, at least it was real."
Everythingin my life is happening now,
somehow.
Somewhere.
She is still here somehow.
Somewhere.
We are still together in some different when.
We have been hiking all day.
She says she likes the way the sunlight filters through the leaves.
She says it makes her feel restless in a good way.
I tell her it feels like we are in a scene from a movie.
In three years and four days, she will leave me.
Her skin is dark. Her hair is a mess.
She is a goddess.
We make love that night, and I can smell sulfur on her skin.
Faint.
Cicadas an endless undulation.
Dark things out there moving in the forest.
Hey.
Hey, what is this?
You're, uh...
reading my new book.
This is the new book?
No, but this is our life.
What, you don't like it?
What are you talking about?
What-- Don't like it-- What you've written here
are moments from our life.
Private moments.
Sweetheart, every writer's life ends up in his work. It's just--
No. No.
Not these. Not these.
These are personal details.
I don't want people reading about these things, okay.
These are between you and me.
I'm sorry. I...
had no idea you would be upset by this.
You know, that's what upsets me the most actually,
that you thought that I would be okay with this.
With having our lives in a book for millions of people to just--
Yeah, not really millions yet, but that is the general idea.
Okay.
I'm really disgusted with you right now.
-Disgusted? -Yeah.
Yeah, I just-- I see something that I don't like.
What do you see?
Can I ask you a question?
Jacob, if I asked you to take that stuff out
and write something else, would you do it?
-You wouldn't do it, would you? -Cassandra, it's--
It's my best work.
Sweetheart, I, I write...
to make a better life for us.
I've made a better life for us. I've got us this place.
There's my answer.
I'd choose you.
No, you wouldn't.
Shh.
feeling her breathing against me.
Trapped.
Knowing there's nothing I can tell her for comfort but lies.
In two months and four days, she'll leave me.
She's already gone...
even though her body is still there.
It's just been in my head all this time.
Finally see it for real, you know.
Yeah, a movie, it's--
Seriously, it's been one of my biggest dreams.
What? This--
This doesn't excite you?
No, I-I'm...
I'm excited for you.
I just think we get excited about very different things, you know.
We need different things, you know.
What do you-- What do you want? What do you need?
I can-- I can get it to you.
I need a normal life.
Um, I need a husband and kids someday.
But you're different, you know.
You, you're doing what you're meant to be doing.
You have another purpose.
I'll quit.
I'll quit right now. I-I just--
I just need you.
No, it's not that simple.
It's, uh, it's a catch-22.
'Cause, you know, what I love about you,
and what I've always loved about you is your talent
and your passion and if you gave up your work for me,
you would be giving up the thing I love most about you.
What am I supposed to do?
-Exactly what you are doing. -Well, I can't.
I can't. Not if you're unhappy.
-Of course you can. -Just--
Let's start over.
Leave all of this behind.
I can be happy with you no matter where we are.
But, Jacob, like, just stop and think about what you're saying for a second.
Just consider, like,
you know, you in a small house, in a small town,
a small job, a small life.
Would that really make you happy?
In eight days, she will leave me.
The moments we've shared will start fading
like film negatives left in the sun.
-If you unders-- -All night and all morning--
-If you understood me-- -Oh, I don't understand--
-Oh, I must be so stupid to not understand -If you knew me better,
-you wouldn't be asking this. -what it takes to write a book.
-Let me do my work. -Fine, fine.
This is good.
Yeah.
I, uh...
I've been meaning to talk to you about something.
Yeah?
What?
Uh...
baby, it's time.
It's past time.
I-I've loved you since the day we first met.
You're the best person I've ever known.
There is no one else in the world I want to be with but you.
I, I know you worry about my work, but...
you're my muse. You inspire me to be better.
Jake, I don't-- I don't-- I, uh--
I don't know what to say.
Well, it's, it's just one word.
Um...Okay, I want to talk about this, okay?
What's, what's there to talk about?
Will you marry me?
I saw this ring, and I knew it was time.
I saw our... whole life together.
I saw us with babies...
I saw us with grown-up kids,
when we're all old and covered with wrinkles,
and all we do is sit in the same room and read all day.
I saw 50 Christmases.
I saw trips to Europe.
Every moment I've ever looked forward to involves you.
I-I-I want you to be with me, now.
Baby, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
What am I supposed to do?
I-I thought I could be happy, but--
All I ever wanted was just to be everything to you.
You absolutely are.
I'm not.
Can you ever truly erase something from yourmemories?
Or can you just push it down?
Kick it into the shadows until you can no longer see it.
But so much pain can't just remain hidden forever,
no matter where you hide it.
Every bit of pain and love and sadness
we have ever felt is still somewhere in our minds.
Changed, perhaps...
but never gone.
One month and fourteen days since she left.
Five years, eight months, twenty-four days ago we met.
I tell myself that every one of those moments still exists,
somewhere in time.
I tell myself we just met at that funeral.
Hey, Jake.
I tell myself
we are lying on a warm rock
beside a cool creek in a forest
where the leaves shiver
and the sunlight dapples the ground.
I said, "Hey, Jake!"
I tell myself we're floating in that lake,
our bodies unattached from the world.
Her warmth against me in the cold.
Hey.
What's happening?
Nice robe, brother.
You know, you're gonna drown those plants, man.
They're just plants.
Well, hey, look, you damn well know I'm not a psychologist,
but if you wanna come over and complain...
...I got beer.
Thanks.
Hey.
You said come over if...
I wanted to complain.
Right. Didn't expect it so soon.
It's funny.
I don't miss my mother.
Huh?
She died three years ago.
I'm sorry to hear that.
Like I said.
I don't miss her.
Okay.
When she went...
I hadn't seen her in over a year.
I used to go home a lot, then less.
I still loved her, still love her
But that's the thing. The love wasn't immediate.
It was all tied up in these memories.
There were these warm... happy memories.
Now, I'm worried.
I'm worried that the same thing is gonna happen to her.
That...
I won't miss her anymore.
That she won't be immediate...
anymore.
Cassandra didn't die, did she?
No.
Oh, God. Thank God for that.
She's still alive.
Thanks.
Thanks for listening.
Of course. Glad I could help.
You know, Cassandra...
she always liked you.
She thought you were hilarious.
That's a compliment, I think.
Yeah.
You didn't--
You never fucked her, did you?
Christ!
What kind of question is that?
So...no?
Of course not.
Cool.
See you later.
Fucking nutbag.
Five years.
I despair this masterpiece may never get finished.
I'm close. I'm close.
I'm just trying to end it.
The end is the most important part of a story.
Once you've taken them on this journey,
you can't just leave them.
Things have to wrap up properly.
I want to end it with a quote.
Any quote?
That's the thing. I don't know.
A quote that ends the story perfectly.
The story of her.
Say, that's not a bad title. What do you think, "The Story of Her?"
I don't like it.
So you're just looking for any old quote?
I invented my own.
About her.
About our story.
Drumroll?
Not necessary.
It goes like this:
"What does the sun have to fear?
"For he looks down and sees all the world,
"and all the people on it,
"and they look to him, and they are lit by him,
"and they cannot live without him.
"He grows the plants that feeds them, and...
"heats the air that warms them.
"They are his friends.
"But what of the night?
"Which does nothing but scare...
"and make it hard for people to see.
"It has but the moon, whose glow is ever changing
"and fickle as the passing of time.
"Only the stars are its friends.
"And what sayeth the night...
when the starlight ends?"
I like it.
Really?
Hello.
Huh?
No, that's great.
Listen, man. Listen. I hate reading.
I hate to read...
and I stayed up all night last night.
And I'm telling you, this is your masterpiece.
And I'm telling you thanks.
And as usual, you're being an asshole.
I'm sorry.
You're right. I--
I just-- I got to thinking about her.
For real? It's been five years.
You've got to get over this chick.
You've got to move on.
I mean, it's great and all.
All that angst or whatever that brought you to this book.
But really, you need to move on.
Listen, you're great. This is great.
Now, you need to go out there and get laid.
Thanks.
I, uh...
I'm gonna go see her.
What do you think's gonna happen?
I don't think anything's gonna happen.
I just have to know...
if I made the right choice or not.
If I should have fought to keep her.
If I should have given all of this up.
One day since I called her
and heard her voice for the first time in five years.
I told her I was in town,
that I had tracked her down through a friend.
She didn't know if it was a good idea for us to see each other.
I said it was.
Just to catch up. Have a mellow chat.
That was what I said.
-Hi. -Hi.
It's good to see you.
You're pregnant.
Yeah.
-Come on in. -Sure.
Here.
This is really great iced-tea.
You, uh, make it from scratch?
No, I buy it at the shop.
It's like five bucks for 20 bottles.
It's delicious.
You're not, uh...
Oh, no, caffeine's not good for...
-Oh. -I get it for Al.
Al?
-That's his name, huh? -Mm-hmm.
Al.
Is that short for something? Alfred? Alvin? Alowishus?
Alan.
-The next one I was gonna say. -Oh.
Yeah, I was surprised when you called actually.
You know, I tried to get in touch a few years ago after we, uh...
I thought we could be friends.
I was still pretty bitter.
Yeah.
I'm sorry if it's...weird
me coming up here. I just-- It's uh--
I, uh...just finished my latest book.
It's the one about you.
The... one I've been working on forever.
I, uh, I just finished it,
and I don't know, it...
it felt right coming up here to see you for some reason.
For closure?
I guess.
I've read all your work.
Uh, the stuff you've been writing
while finishing that one, I guess.
The novel, the spy novel.
And I saw "Tears of--"
Oh, yeah.
Yeah. I've been pretty busy.
Yeah.
You got a girl?
Sometimes.
Good for you.
What's your last name now?
Miller.
Cassandra Miller.
Alan Miller.
I like it.
Because it's, uh...exotic.
It's not all that different from Silver.
No.
No, just a few letters.
And a totally different guy.
I was, uh...
I was talking to my agent, Don, the other day,
you remember Don?
Yeah, I think so.
I-I told him I was coming up here because...
I wanted to see if I'd made the right choice.
You know, with how things went,
in the end with you and I.
And?
I feel weird talking about it.
I mean...
can the baby hear us?
Well, I, uh,
don't want him hearing
some other guy, some other dude you used to have sex with.
Could be, uh, confusing for him.
It's a girl.
A girl?
And, no, I think it's fine.
Just don't start yelling at me or anything.
Yelling at you?
I'm not really the yelling type.
No, I know. Yeah.
You were always really patient.
Whoa!
Well, she just kicked.
Oh.
Here, you wanna feel?
In 41 minutes, I will walk out.
I will hug her, being careful not to press my stomach
too hard against her stomach,
because I don't want to squish her baby
or fold it in half or something.
She will say we should keep in touch.
I will say I will.
She will smile and close the door.
I will walk to my car.
I won't look back.
In one hour and 11 minutes, I will be in my car
on the way to the airport.
I will start crying suddenly,
and then I will stop.
Like those summer rainstorms that come and go so fast,
it's like it never happened.
Then...I'll rewrite the future.
In this alternate timeline, she says yes
when I ask her to marry me.
We make love that night, and she gets pregnant.
Al Miller died in a horrible sky-diving accident.
No big deal, since neither of us ever met him.
Our son's name is Morgan.
She always loved that name, and I say it's fine
as long as we never start shortening it to become Morg.
Chelsea and David come later.
Chelsea becomes a doctor.
David joins the army for a week,
then leaves because he says it's too hard.
He goes to film school. He wins an Oscar.
He thanks his mom and says I'm his inspiration.
He gets a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
Morgan is a star tailback in high school.
He is drafted by L.A.'s new football team.
In this alternate universe,
L.A. finally has a football team.
They are terrible, until Morgan comes along.
Then they win an unprecedented three straight Super-Bowls.
Cassandra and I get old.
Our bones don't work so good anymore.
We have to wear diapers.
Her glasses get thicker every year.
I wear a hearing-aid, and she's always nagging at me
to turn it up because I always can't hear her.
We never get Alzheimer's.
We always remember each other,
right up until the day we die.
We die on the same day,
so neither of us is alone at all.
The last thing she ever asks me
is if I made the right choice.
I ask her if she's happy.
She says of course she is.
Then I just smile.
That's my answer.