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Hey, what's up?
Beyond the snowfall of friends, is not heavy.
I know. Anyway, I have good news. Telephone Vitaly.
Good, just a minute.
Hello? / Yo, V, wake up at 2 siang noon? Come on.
2 girls on my bed, you follow me.
Yes, right. Listen, I have good news.
What?
We make films. The boss calls, he wants to make a movie.
Porn film? / Not porn...
Like real movies, bad movies.
Get rid of the girl, we bring her vital tool.
Real 92.3, hip hop and R & B LA, I'm your partner Big Boy,
Los Angeles voice, actually, LA.
We stare at the beautiful weather of friends, going bright.
But let me say, the Ohio and the Russian madman,
they go to Los Angeles.
So, as said, be careful.
You have been warned.
Good, like this. So at 8 o'clock you will meet the first person here.
We hope that all of these people will immediately arrive.
They have been told about people who live here,
John, all of you.
So we are John all the time? / You guys John all the time.
You don't really know me.
Your boss arranges this. Your boss can be an agent, manager.
You can be yourself if you want.
So, hopefully these people are right time. Thank you for coming.
My normal girl goes out of town. / Cool.
What is our work? / I'm stress.
Whatever. You can improvise. / OK.
It looks like it's very good.
Okay, do it.
How does it work? / Joke of the penis is tense, take 1.
Can you hold it with your feet and release it later?
Can you, like, pinch your feet?
He came, he came.
Hey, he's sexy.
Hi. How are you? / Hi. Good. How are you?
I'm John. / Nicole.
Nice to meet you. Thank you very much for coming.
I'm very sore.
You work to be a masseuse or...
Just that? / Yes.
Perfect.
The order is also right.
Impossible! / Did he see it?
Yes, look.
How long have you been massaging? / About 5 years.
Oh my God. Your smell is fragrant.
Thank you. / Oh, my God!
Oh my God!
Yes!
A little harder.
Why? / It is okay.
Yes, please be harder and fast a little.
Passionate a little?
Oh my God, I'm sorry.
Oh my God.
This is normal, right?
No.
Stone, paper, scissors, loose. Bastard.
I'll bring him to you.
Hey! / Hey. How are you?
What's wrong? / John.
You're John, I'm Bob. / John.
Bob? Bobby. / Yes.
Yes. / Where do you come from?
Topanga Canyon.
Where? From Nigeria?
No, Topanga Canyon.
We are ready. / What do you do?
I'm a music producer.
Really? / I beat.
Yes.
How often do you care?
Usually once a week.
But women usually, men have never been.
Yes.
But I hear men's hands are more nice and strong
and men really can, you know, do what you have to do, you.
I usually massage women, but...
I don't mind massaging you and...
Your body is sexy.
You take off your shirt. Great. / My age 62.
62? You look fit.
Is that right?
I like it. You channel energy.
Yes.
I also like the energy worker energy. / Yes.
Are you uncomfortable? You're a little... / Not at all.
Come face to face. / Okay, sure.
I don't have a problem with that. / Good.
Yes, just spread my hand. Continue.
You can do everything you want, friend.
Just continue. / Try.
I have never touched anyone like this.
Cool.
Sorry about this.
You can take off your jeans.
If you don't mind.
We are at home, man. Just take off the jeans if you want.
You know, I'm more comfortable
if you loose your jeans. / Really?
Good!
Shut up.
What is that?
I'm talking about my work.
I was almost fired today.
Heavy, you know, in a position where you might be fired.
Let me see your ass.
So how many...
How many men have you gauli?
None. / Really?
Yes.
I'm not... / If you kiss me once?
Strapping my penis craze.
Damn!
What is this?
Hey, welcome to the dream exhaust, friend.
Tell the camera the name and your car?
My name is Joey Alcazar.
I have a Chevy Delray in 1958.
My name is Angel Antunez. They call me Bullet.
Mobilku Primeros in '68 Chevy Impala without roof.
And why do they call you Bullet?
You don't want to know.
Robert Salinas, aka Hollywood.
I have a Cadillac in 1964 without a roof.
Then how long have you had this Cadillac?
Maybe it's been around 15 years.
Yes, man, the car matches you.
Yes. / It looks very harmonious.
That's why they called me Mr. Hollywood.
That's good friends. So, what do you like from your car?
What do you like to do ride in your car?
You know, I joined the USO car club a few years ago.
We love the family who we wake up, you know?
And you know, when we met it felt like we had known for a long time.
Hey! Wait, hey! Are they there with you?
Hey! / Hey!
Hey we need to attract attention. Robert's car is here.
We have people. Maybe we just call the police.
What are you doing, bro? / What is that?
Do you have my car? / Take gasoline.
Wait, you suck up my battery?
Yes. / What do you suck for?
Because... / Why?
What are you doing? / I know this looks bad, bro.
I know this looks bad. / Calm down. Relax. Why are you doing this?
Get away from my car. / Mr. Holly...
Get away from my car!
Calm down, calm down!
Get away from my car. / My one...
Get away from my car! / Calm down! Let me take my license.
Take it, take it. / Let me take my watch.
Your ***!
Calm down. / Okay, we...
If you ask for money, I will give it!
Don't touch people's cars!
Kiss me. / What's your name, bro?
Look, why do you have to be delinquents?
In Russia, we kiss each other when separates.
Get out of here!
Do you want to be beaten? / What for?
Yo! / What is your problem?
Let's call the police, we will call the police, Robert!
Why are you making it up, bastard?
Come on bastard!
Come on bastard! Do you want to make a fuss? Come on!
Just a gallon of bro, a gallon. Segalon for my scooter.
Okay, I go. I go.
Damn! He is crazy.
Don't whip me with belts.
Please!
Come on bro. / Please.
He doesn't want to talk. I just want to know his name.
Please don't. Don't yell at me.
Hey. / We are shooting a movie. There are cameras everywhere.
Robert, Robert. Hey, you are being bullied now.
You're trapped bro. You're trapped.
My friend, this is just a joke, my friend. / This is just a joke.
This is just a joke. / Everyone is involved, friend.
Your friend traps you bro.
We don't scratch your car.
We can't even open the lid your gasoline.
Why are you working on me? You bastard.
Good work. / Why?
Why are you? Why? You tell me to come here for this garbage?
Hey friend. Today we are at the beach Miami with Vitaly.
We bring friends.
Beware, hey.
Oh my God.
Fuck!
I will take the stun.
The idea is that we bring someone in, maybe a young man from the road,
and make him believe us again shoot a loose film.
We will act as a camera crew. / What is my little role,
I was grabbed and didn't know...
You are grabbed real and you don't know.
Hey, do you want to learn acting? Good.
When he parked, you're the audio part. Okay?
OK? Play the part.
You're part of the camera. / I'm the audio part.
Stop, bro. Come on, grow up.
Hey, they want to park, so please professional.
Who is the girl? Oh, my God.
Hi, how are you? / Hi, great.
Great? Good. / Yes.
So, because we have a little time,
Let me immediately explain what we will do.
And let's have fun. So we have a small crew here.
We only have microphones and cameras, and we will follow you.
There is our register actually here.
You enter through the door like a robber.
You look around, settle, might see things.
And stay in this area, and you will rob the cashier.
OK. / Got it?
We put our people here. He won't give you the money.
You have to get the money.
I have to get the money. / Yes.
Yes, let's practice. Let's get out.
Well, we start from here. Right here, get ready.
Dennis, you're behind him.
Okay, the cashier has arrived. Now listen to me.
Take the money then exit. Understand? / OK.
Are you ready? The camera is ready?
Audio? The voice is ready. Action.
Give the money. / What the hell? Ma...
Shut up and give the money.
Ma! What the hell? Ma!
Shut up! / Damn it!
Shut up! And give the money! / OK! Damn, I have a girl.
Stand or shoot!
OK! Okay! I'm not armed! / Stupid!
Wake up! / Okay, okay!
Okay, damn it! / Hurry up!
Don't shoot! / You know? give everything!
Shut up! I raise your head.
Don't kill me. I just want to go home to see my daughter.
Fuck it all!
Don't kill me! Shit! / Give the money!
Don't kill me please.
Don't kill me.
Shut up.
Do it! / Come on!
Come on. Drop the gun.
Drop the gun! Drop the gun now!
Come on now!
Come on. / I'm not armed.
Is this kidding? / Turn around!
Do I look joking?
Put the bag! / Put the bag!
I was with the film crew!
What crew film?
We receive a silent alarm.
They told me, swear to God. I...
Hands above head!
Is this kidding? / I'll hand him over.
Oh my God! / Hands above head!
The hand above... / Sir the police? Can I come out?
Yes, come out.
They trap me.
Indeed.
Oh my God! / We will take your wallet.
Stand up. / Take your wallet at the police station.
Oath for God!
We finish at the police station.
Are you serious?
Wait, what...
What is this? Just a minute. / Close to the car.
Oh my God!
They trap me!
Oh my God!
You scare me half dead!
Excuse me, sir.
We have an inspection today, you wear underwear or not.
Do you mind dropping these pants
and see what type of underwear do you use?
What's wrong? What do you say? You say I'm a bitch?
No, I said... / Why did you say I was a jerk?
I... never said that. / Come here.
He says I'm a bitch.
No sir. I put my cellphone...
Why did you say he was a jerk? / Never, sir.
Yes sir. / Yes, Sir.
Are you police-police or real police?
No, ma'am. Why, I look like a policeman?
Yes, right. / You don't know.
You have a gun. / Yes.
You're a cop.
me?
Stop things. Is he a cop?
If he looks like a cop, I will say yes.
Okay, because he is playing with me. / Looks like a cop.
Are you drunk mom?
Yes. / Yes, I thought.
Your face is drunk.
Hey, there's a little spider on your shoulder.
Move to the back, that. / Oh, my God!
Now in your hair. / Seriously, get rid of me!
Oh my God. No, the profits are big.
Stop you guys.
Hey la, punk!
It turns out Tom Mabe. Louisville, Kentucky. / How are you, friend?
I didn't do it. / Hey, you sexy asshole!
Hey friend.
Hey friend, how are you? Welcome to Hooters.
I want to take cold drinks, soft drinks? The stock is still full.
OK. I'll take it.
So we are at Burbank. It's really beautiful here.
We will do ignorance with these people.
Small baby. See cute little babies. See them.
This is the name of the eavesdropping person.
This is like bullying someone who is eavesdropping on a conversation.
Basically this joke, we try to scare people.
That's the real goal.
Hello, this is Tom.
Here it is.
Sorry, friend. If you want to shout.
I... no... sound...
Husband?
Dude, he didn't say he was married.
Angry him!
He didn't say he was married.
He listens.
Do you want to be beaten? Dude...
Bring your friend.
Dude, I didn't get it! I don't even know who he is!
I'm across the street. At the bus stop.
I use flannel clothes. I think I'm ready to take the bus now. Come on.
Yes.
Damn.
Did he take the bus? / Yes.
Damn.
Hey, it's okay Tom.
Good practice for you. Looks good on the camera.
So, we continue and wait other targets.
Damn, he's back! He is back!
Yo, tom. He turned back.
He is still there. Continue. Go, go.
Send him. / Send them.
Hard. Send him hard.
There the bastard turns out.
Damn!
Hey friend. Come on, I need to talk to you for a while.
Go to the wall there. Let me say to you. No, there.
There. Here. Here. No, there.
There, listen. / Now!
Listen, let me talk to you.
Here. Here. No, I will talk to him. Here.
There, just go there.
Damn.
Damn. / Look at that.
So, you sleep with my wife.
No, that's another man. He went there.
Go? What do you mean 'another man?'
What other man?
He who is dressed in blue there. He shouted on the phone.
So you're not... you're playing games. I've been here, what now?
No, not me. / What do you mean, aren't you?
Not me!
He is scared. / Attract your cellphone!
Look, it's not me. See? This is my call list. Not me.
That's you. Do you think I'm stupid?
Do you think I'm stupid? / What do you want friends?
I'm afraid. I have no idea. / Stop talking stutter!
Are you afraid? So you don't fuck with my wife?
I'm gay. / Are you gay?
Impossible, nonsense.
This, I show my girlfriend now.
That bastard isn't... / This is me and my girlfriend.
Bullshit! / He is not gay.
Bullshit. / This is me and my girlfriend.
So you think it's good I will do it?
Do you think it's nice to say this person?
I stand next to the man when he calls.
He shouted... / So how can you know that man?
I heard, I stood at the side beside him when he scolded people on the phone.
I think you're lying! / I'm not lying.
I'm not lying. / So you lie me. You make love to my wife.
Oh my God.
No. I have a girlfriend. I am gay. / Are you gay?
I'm not interested in what women are.
Do you know? The attraction of your cellphone.
Attract your cellphone or teach you.
Yo. You got tricked.
I almost signed my death certificate.
You killed him, Tom. / He is gay.
Come to a friend.
I want to apologize to this man.
What a good person. / Sorry friend.
Once shooting, huh? Once.
Tommy's good work. You're great, bro. / Thank you.
It was good. It's funny
We are 9 months pregnant. Yvonne.
Maybe one of the craziest women I've ever met.
Her husband did not know he would give birth to a black baby.
Hey, we finished 5, 10 minutes.
Can I call later?
I think I'm contracting.
I think you might want to go home now.
Really? / Yes.
Okay... I'll... I... I'm home now.
Okay, fine. See you soon
OK. / Good. Dah.
Oh my God.
Close the phone.
Gosh. Hit. / Let's start this game.
The man panics now.
The man's world is shaken.
Dude, sorry for that guy!
I... my goodness.
He comes. / There he is. He came.
Friends, he parked now.
He parked now. Geez.
Yvonne, your efforts are amazing.
The baby looks very healthy.
Damn.
Hello. / Hello, hi.
He is Jukka? / He's my husband, George.
Congratulations George.
Congratulations. Yvonne was healthy, everything was smooth.
We will prepare it for transferred.
Oh my God! Look at his face! / His face was stunned.
No!
Em... that's...
Let him talk for a while.
Friends, get out of there. Give him a minute.
Excuse me sir. We will prepare the move.
And we will return. Wait, okay?
I want to tell you, but...
That...
You have to say something.
He was shocked. Shocked.
Is this our baby?
I...
Exit, Will, exit. / Yes.
Okay, are you ready to move?
Do you want to help carry it?
You don't want to hug your baby?
Eve, Eve.
I just got an SMS. He is fine?
Damn!
Yes. He is fine. / Oh, my God.
He is not playing. / This is Will.
George? / Damn it!
Oh my God.
I'm happy to be able to facilitate your .
I am blessed to be a part of this.
Congratulations on you. / Oh, my God.
He is very beautiful. He is healthy.
Wait, what's wrong?
George, please. Happy friend.
We will raise a family together.
Oh my God! / Congratulations.
Congratulations, this is really beautiful.
Thank you. Thank you guys
Beautiful baby. / You look impressive.
You look very beautiful. / Thank you.
Congratulations. / Kiss the baby.
Oh my God.
See that poor man, bung. This...
It's like watching people beaten clubs.
So we first, prepare a move.
You want to come along,
join us to the ambulance?
Maybe you can get a pillion, maybe.
Yes, let him talk. He wants to say something.
Can we all go together?
Dear God, man!
Oh my God! Bro, he wants a photo.
Ask the father to take a picture.
Ask him to join the photo.
Do you want to join sir?
Are you okay? There is something wrong?
You can join photos or...
What's wrong? / Hey, you look great.
Yvonne, the business is awesome.
Come here. You have a baby.
I mean, this is how.
Friends, can we leave he and his wife alone?
Bring the baby to the back room and leave them alone .
Ah, let me see. / OK.
Let me carry it and examine it for a moment. / Yes, no problem.
Can I accompany the baby?
No, for a moment. / No, you've been with him before.
Sorry.
What's wrong?
Is this usually the reaction of George to face the situation?
How to...
Now it's been 4 years I delivered a letter here.
When I know you might have pregnancy problems, I'm...
Very happy to help.
How... wait.
It's okay.
Wait, don't...
Wait a minute.
Are you okay? / Did you not tell him?
Not yet, just want to. / Did you not tell him?
You didn't tell him?
But the baby is born faster. / No.
When I stop and drink tea, that time and everything.
Every day I stop by. Don't you tell him?
You think, I thought you said he was happy about that?
Very good.
Wait, when? When do you drink tea?
When did you drink tea?
Often.
Let's go there.
That's your baby now.
My part is finished.
No man. You are not his father.
Poor George.
Oh my God!
She's a beautiful baby.
The first time he spoke!
Oh my God, I'm so... he said!
Nice to meet you.
Yes, same.
Thank you, sorry about today. / Good.
You bastard.
We accept that. / Yes. Very... born innocent people.
Can we have photos?
I just want to photograph once. Photos once there.
Hey friend, what's wrong? I just want to say the car is good.
Thank you. / Yes. Hey, can I ask for a little help?
Say this smell is not.
You're like Mario. Mario game.
Remember that game, like on Nintendo 64?
Like when you play, you see little turtles fly on the screen?
That's you man.
It's like wherever I go, this man...
I feel like a third person.
I'm Kevin Brueck and this is a joke human organ.
Which direction is Cedars Sinai?
You can't drop me.
This is an electric racket.
Use it to shock the fly.
Bastard.
Do you think this is funny?
Look, you never know what
So what is this object?
This is air mortar.
Is that full? Can we test? / Yes.
Damn!
Good.
So this barrel will explode.
This barrel will explode.
Then what will it come out?
Whatever you want.
It's like an artificial bomb, bro.
What is that? / This is the switch
Really? Do you just push to activate it?
Great. Fill it out, friend. / Can I fill it?
Great. This will be great.
Can you put it here?
Yes, this is paper.
I stand on it, I almost fell inside.
Damn.
The one there. I stand on it and I like...
Good.
Wait a minute. Hey, Tony.
My name is Tony and these are 2 of my best friends,
and today we will get drunk and drive.
That's cool.
Today we serve people who have discount tickets and we will show them riding well.
Yes sir. / Correct.
So, we will call it hot zone
and we will create an area where no one can pass.
Understand? / Obviously?
You see something dangerous,
anything okay, if you think it's danger, stop it.
Understand? Do not hesitate.
Say immediately, say loudly, make sure this...
Cool. Okay.
Hey friends.
Vitaly, let go!
Vitaly, you don't hear new ones just say.
When does our target arrive? Now?
They are almost here now.
So this? Is this real?
Shooting a movie here? / Yes, they arrived.
Time to act.
Do you like to say that or do you see them?
They have arrived. Here. / Shut up.
Are you serious? / Yes bro.
Damn, I can't speak.
Just pretend you are
breeder.
Jahili them. / Here,
this is your place, these people are your customers.
You're not Vitaly.
How are you guys? My name is Rudolph.
Nice to meet you.
Rudolph. / Damn, what's wrong?
My character is missing.
How are you guys? / How are you! Hey!
Hi, Rudolph. / Hi, Taylor.
How are you guys? / Hi, Rudolph. Happy...
Nathaniel. / Hey, Nathaniel. Charlie.
Charlie, nice to meet you. / Charlie, nice to meet you guys.
And you? / Taylor.
Taylor, just sign there.
Hey Nancy.
How are Jordan?
Hi, nice to meet you. / How are you?
What's wrong? I'm Jordan. Nice to meet you.
Hey guys, how are you?
What you need to do... this is a responsibility sheet.
Fill in the info here.
Initials. You are over 18 years old, right?
Yes. / Yes.
Okay, good. / I have to go to the bathroom.
You can use a portable toilet there.
Good. / Continue.
The one on the right is the small cleanser.
Okay, thank you. / Yes.
I love you! / I love you too.
So it's like disgusting. / Yes indeed.
Have you been here?
Really?
Damn! Slowly!
Great child!
Slow down!
The one there is my sister.
He mostly drinks.
Hey!
Gosh!
Oh my God! / I am sorry.
What are you guys?
There are people inside! Damn it!
We better contact someone over the radio.
Call medical personnel!
/ There is no one there.
Is he here? / What are you doing?
Yo, friend. Wretched car crashes a miserable portable toilet.
I really regret my friend.
You damage the toilet! / Hey Taylor!
Taylor? / Damn it!
You drive like crazy friends!
There is a door.
There is a door below!
Is he there? / The door below.
Hey, can you hear me?
The toilet is broken.
Yo, there, there!
Taylor! / Wait.
Fuck you guys! Fuck it!
Fuck all of you!
You almost lost control of your friends.
Good work! / Nathaniel!
I thought he would die.
Don't act like you're not angry in the crowd.
You can't do it.
What?
You're a cop. / Yes.
Yes, whatever.
What?
Do what you have to do.
Yes, I can do anything I want.
Oh my God.
Your crazy base!
July 13, 2012 Vitaly Zdorovetsky was arrested for having a fake bomb.
Jokes that beach men think Delray is popular
ends with his arrest.
Your life, your choice.
60 seconds.
Yes, the transaction is complete.
He was fined 3,000 dollars.
Hi, how are you? Demetri. Nice to meet you.
Demetri. Please come in.
Please sit down.
So tell me a little about yourself.
I work at a cigarette shop now. / Cigarette shop?
So you smoke good, marijuana.
That's what they call in America, huh?
It doesn't know anything about it.
You have good abilities lift-lifting?
Heavy objects?
Yes, I've worked on UPS.
So, they always tell you lift packages and heavy items.
OK. What kind of package?
Is there something strange?
No. I mean like...
Food, sometimes meat...
Wait a minute. Sorry about that, sorry really.
Want to drink? / No, no.
Are you sure? / Yes, it's okay.
Good. Wait a minute.
What do you want from me?
See this police report.
There is a name.
I don't care about the name of the child , okay?
I have a meeting here. Stop it.
Explain. Hah?
I don't do anything!
You're stupid, huh? With the arrival of the police and everything.
Return to you. Sorry.
Good, so you want to do work or...
What kind of work exactly?
You... the job is like cleans the body.
Like the human body? / Body, yes.
You did it before.
No, not yet, I've never been. / Do you want to help?
10,000, 15,000 dollars in cash per month.
Guaranteed. Come on, my friend.
10,000, 15,000 dollars in cash.
Cash? / Agree, cash.
Come on, I believe you.
You're my brother. Help me transport the body. Come on.
Come on, come with me.
What's wrong? There is something wrong?
No, no, I'm just...
You're tense.
Get ready.
Don't, please don't. / You will die like a damn man.
Not a loser.
Why are friends?
I almost fainted my friend.
So we do ATM jokes now.
See all the money dear.
This will be great. / How did the money come out?
How does the money come out, Vitaly? / So, press this button,
turn on the green lights, then you hold this.
When you release, the money stops. You hold it, the money comes out.
Good.
Do you want a thousand?
Yes.
No, I'm following, want to take money now, then I can meet you.
Yes, man, no. I'll give you cash and we break even.
How much do you owe? Hundred?
I wonder what he said.
Hey, you know? The ATM doesn't work. I think it's broken.
Yes, it's okay. I will...
I just go to the gas station when I return
and I will stop there take the money for you.
Do it.
How are you friends?
That's good.
Yo, let me tell you the trick, bro. This is a secret.
Enter notes.
Type how much money you want.
Press again. Look at this.
Take it. Take.
Oh my God.
Take it, bro.
You're welcome.
That object takes thousands of dollars of friends.
You can't bring it all.
Around there?
Give the money. / No, this is not your money.
Give the money.
This is not your money. / Give the money!
This is not your money! / Give the money!
This is not your money!
Come on. Watch out for your head.
Green, maybe rock?
Good, yes, I'll call my person.
Call my person and tell him meet us here.
Are you serious? / Yes.
10-4. 5-0.
We are there... he ran away! Stop!
Hey!
Yo, what's wrong?
Peter. Pete.
Yo, can you come audition as park guard for a while?
My name is Joey Johnson. I'm a park guard,
and this is the day of my life.
Good, do I have to come in my work uniform?
Sure. / Good. See you later.
Damn.
Joey to headquarters. We have a problem here.
How are you guys? Hey, I'm Mitch.
I'm the producer. How are you? I'm Mitch. How are you?
Let's look through here.
We have men because here.
We have big kids here, today.
So, he will watch today.
How are you guys? My name is Sasha.
I'm a director from Russia.
He who directs today.
You guys, how are you? How are you? They call me V.
V for vanilla. How are you?
How are you? Good. Okay. Good.
Let's start, kid. / Yes, let's do it, bro.
Everyone, follow me.
Join, Sasha. Get through here, come with me.
Okay, you guys. The camera is ready?
We have 14-by-16 hb3,
so I want to move it to 65.
Mitch, shooting must have been set 10 minutes ago.
Shake your buttocks.
I want... O Lord.
Anyway, we will do this several times.
If your day is bad, you break up with a boyfriend,
it's not my problem. So, please,
I want the spirit.
Are we ready to record?
V where do we place it? / Yo, V, you.
Yes, I just want to thank you. / No problem.
With pleasure V. / Again because you have done this.
Damn, it's automatic.
This will be a great shot next. Let's do it.
Play the music.
Okay you guys, ready! Hey!
Repeat again.
Action.
Smile! Spirit!
Flirtatious, flirty, you are lesbi, come on.
Yes! Let's do it!
I see! I see, V! I see, V!
Smile! High spirit.
Faster. Shake her butt. Faster.
Good, that's cut.
Cut.
You like 10 people.
But, we need you to 100.
Shut up Mitch. I don't want to do it again. Camera part?
Sounds, boards, cameras.
Mitch, Vanilla.
Play the music, friend. / Action!
Bang, bang. Spring season holidays. You love each other.
Continue.
Good, you guys. Connect one to another. So.
Let's do it. Smile.
Stop it. I don't feel...
Continue.
Close up, close! Close you up, close up.
Smile, smile. / Docked, docked
Oh my God. / Seriously!
Is he defecated? / Who...
The girl has just defecated in the pool.
Very disgusting. I'm finished.
Hey you guys, you guys, hurry back.
Let's finish. / I don't want to plunge.
This is my last video shot .
Just throw your legs. You won't even see it on the camera.
No. / No.
We won't see it... see, no...
I don't want to plunge. / We will edit it via photoshop.
Mitch, let me take over.
He defecates there. You know, right?
You run away from work. You don't want to work?
Of course you want.
How about additional fees? / No.
In order to keep going, you have to go back dear.
Yes, keep running. / We're fine.
That is the dirt, he can come back splash into the water.
Yes, he will dive into the water.
Splash your legs.
Hi, how about this? How about this?
You just sit around the pool.
Let's continue.
When you see this, you won't see the dirt.
Friends, we will lose if we don't.
Please, come back. Please.
Again. Come on. It's not so bad. Once.
Good. We just continue. Go ahead, ready?
Play the music.
Good, camera recording.
Action. / This is it.
Begins, here it is!
Smile, ah.
Ah, smile. Lift your hands.
Smile, ah. Background.
Smile.
Yo, let's take this.
Smile.
Smile!
Smile. Shit
What's up?
This is very disgusting. I am out.
Damn.
How are you guys? Today we have Jenna Marbles.
Hi. / How are you Jenna?
Guess? I'm too drunk makes this magic.
Here it is, Criss Angel. You are welcome.
Ready to blow the ball?
Yes, this will be weird.
This will be very strange.
I think it's like that.
This is what I will do to your penis.
Oh yeah, that sounds sexy.
1, 2, 3, release.
I was first.
But if you want to go first?
We save it for video blogs.
Yes, I was first. Me first.
I want you to kill, sell,
hit, slam, flatten it all over his face.
Oh my God, yes.
Faster, faster.
I want... I need it. I need it.
You got it. It's already full.
He pumps it dear.
Pump. Pump harder. Pumps are harder.
harder. Pump!
Yes.
Who will play?
Want to come? Want to play soccer friends?
You know this looks fun.
You've been to a Chinese restaurant
and curious what is the dog's voice?
Every time my mind says that...
Hello, hello, how are you?
Good, you? / Very good.
How are you guys? Want to take a drink?
For starters? Maybe white water, ice water for starters?
Can you ask for lemon juice, please?
Your appetite is still, right? / Ha?
Are you still appetite? We have a new sample.
Yes, I still have appetite. / Yes, this is quite fun.
OK. / So, white water and...
I want water. / 2 water?
Okay good.
Excuse me for a moment.
I don't know.
Why, thank you. / Good, here it is.
Sorry about that. Our ice makers are out.
Everything is fine, okay.
Sorry, I'm sorry.
You don't kill dogs behind there, right?
Killing, sorry?
Si... / No. We actually have a rescue center behind.
So sometimes you can hear it.
OK.
Sounds like it's not like you saved a dog.
Sounds like someone else kills a dog. / I don't like that.
It's not an appetizer that is good.
Do you want water? / White water, please.
2 water?
3 water. All thirsty, okay.
Good. Will return briefly take water.
Look, you have to do something .
So I asked if they killed the dog in the back? Because you know,
Thai people, Chinese cuisine... they...
He brought a dog here?
He brought a dog here.
You see the booms?
Who? / Excuse me.
Boom-boom.
Hey, do you see the booms?
Boom-boom.
Boom-boom!
Boom-boom? What are you doing?
Hey. / I told you through the door back.
Back door?
Damn!
Are you serious? / I like this one.
I'm sorry. Are you okay? Are you okay?
Yes, you know?
Why are there dogs here?
There...
Sometimes they pass the front door, there is a relief center behind.
I know, you said, but... / Yes.
This is not what I ordered.
Friends, you should be behind.
I'll take the others. / Can you move back?
Look, you have to take this back.
They still have to remove the dog from here.
Good, I like this. / Take both booms.
No, not that one.
Half the price. / For children's menus.
Half the price. / Children's menu.
Friends come on. We have customers here.
This is our sample food.
Please enjoy.
You are playing with me... / Wait a minute.
You can't give me that. I...
What do you mean? / It's there...
Dog necklace... / God.
Boom-boom! Boom-boom!
What is this?
Oh my God.
Bring this back.
I ask for the bill.
I don't even know what's new I just eat.
I don't want that. Oh, my God.
You don't want this?
No, I don't want to eat it.
Geez.
All tried? Do you like it?
No, we have...
Your dinner is ready.
Are you ready to fly kid? Are you ready?
Say if you have.
3, 2, here it is.
Oh my God.
Yo. Gosh.
Gosh.
Today we have special guests.
How are you friends?
What do you want today?
I will defecate on canvas.
See this. Is this your preparation for defecation?
Yes, this is then two...
2 spicy hotdog last night that hadn't come out yet.
Dude... / So we use 2 canvas there.
If you throw up, make sure you throw up on the canvas.
We paint?
Good.
Hi, hi.
My name is Joseph. I'm lucky
offer you this beautiful art ,
and we feel honored the arrival of several guests.
You have never met them. This is Rome.
Hi, nice to meet you guys.
This is Art.
And this is And, and And where are you from?
Turkey. / Turkey.
They are part of the group of artists I decided to perform.
The main artist who can't come here, is working on the next work.
He found something in him, most artists throw it away.
They throw it away, they don't think it's art.
I think he found out that something you can do,
and you can also find it in yourself.
All get tickets tonight?
All blue tickets, right? All have been obtained?
You are all ready, right? / Someone will be the winner tonight.
You will win this artwork.
I hope I don't see it on Ebay.
No.
Now let's remember 2 works of the last art, 1 that was bought for 18,000 dollars by a man from France.
And one is bought for 27,000 dollars
by the collector from Northridge.
OK?
This one above that 2 above, above.
Okay so...
Who. Let's see who is lucky winner tonight, okay?
Here it is, let's hear.
Let me take it from the bottom.
Lucky winner of night painting this
number 519
096.
Here.
Are you serious?
You're very lucky.
Very impressive.
This artwork is different,
new, original.
Are you ready?
OK.
Thank you. / Don't be afraid of differences.
This is original art.
What is this smell? / I want to show the creation of this artwork.
We have a video of our artists,
working on this artwork.
Okay everything. Watch it
My body comes from inside my body.
Blank canvas full of potential,
I'll paint my painting
and I scratch it with my brush.
Pass my art,
I express myself.
My art is all for me.
My whole soul explodes in the canvas.
In the sense,
I am my art.
We are glad we did.
Please take the painting.
Take the painting. / No.
Please take it. / Listen to me.
Don't let this drunk person cheat you here.
Maybe this video will change your mind.
This is how we actually make the painting.
This is the actual painting that we give to you. Tahi-tella.
Right, tina.
Good.
This is garbage.
Look at that. We can make whoever believes anything.
That's Nutella and peanut butter.
It was peanut butter and hazelnuts.
Why do I smell the dung?
It smells from it. Yes, fan.
The cup is full of foul _ liquid.
God, you guys.
Tos friend!
Say cissss!
God, forgive, Sister Mary Joseph.
How are you?
Listen, we film and they want you...
Vitaly, can you talk slowly, please? I don't understand you.
Do you mean you don't understand me?
She's the baby's mother. This is our baby.
Who is the baby?
This is our baby.
Ma'am, this is April mop but...
But 2 weeks faster.
Good, listen, you can come here today
for filming, office, please,
and take it, maybe 2, 3 clothes?
OK.
I don't know what to say.
Okay, see you here at 3.30. I will text the address now.
OK, okay.
Do you want more adhesive? / Yes.
Dude, just mixed up the biggest junk you've ever seen.
In the barrel?
There. Dude, you have to look at this garbage.
That's a black adhesive with styrofoam.
Comrade, I hope it's not easy burn.
Good, what time is the mother Vitaly here?
Yo, he can come here anytime. Why, do we close this?
Yes, come on. / Let's get out. He is here in 5 minutes.
Yo, you better give a gift a great mother's day.
When is Mother's Day? / I have no idea.
May, but you have to end up giving this year.
No, he doesn't even care about fella.
Here it is bro. Magic. Please go.
What's beautiful? Finally, looks healthy.
I like your hair.
This is the fifth time we tried it.
No!
No! Vitaly! Stop it!
No!
I'm sorry.
No! This is my favorite jean!
Sorry. / You damn bastard!
Sorry, I love you.
You don't love you anymore.
Exchange him with a new Russian.
I feel disgusting!
Hey...
karma is painful!
I don't know. I have no idea. How do you know?
Hey!
EVENING EVENING DAY!
You sit behind.
Have you ever climbed here?
Not yet
Come on, this will be very...
Have you ever traveled like this?
Not yet, I haven't. I have never been at night. Scary.
Hey friend, we stopped at Crystal Springs,
I think. I met you on the road we've passed?
OK.
We will see deer? I like deer.
I saw 2 coyotes when I passed here.
What! Yes, with my big butt, I can't run or anything.
Why do I let you talk about this ?
You know black people don't hike at night in the forest.
Last time, we are on another road around here.
So where...
What's wrong?
What...
What's up? / What are you doing?
What's wrong?
Oh my God! What is that? Alien?
What's wrong?
We filmed a movie.
This is nonsense.
Oh my God, I wet the bed!
Look, I'm trying to do the right thing to be healthy and go hiking.
This is why obese people cannot climb!
Fat people just stay at home and eat!
And don't go to the mountain!
Swim in the gym or what!
Damn this climb!
How are you guys? Today we are with Furrious... okay.
You said, "furrious." The correct is Furious.
How are you guys? Today we are with Furious Pete.
Start!
My name is Peter Czerwinski. I am a professional competitive eater.
We will eat contest.
Anyone who finishes first push the button in the middle,
those who don't finish the rest the food will be spent.
Literally as easy as that.
I don't want to do this. / Forgive me.
Me too, honest.
Honestly, I don't want to, but you know...
Good, let's start, let's start.
What is that?
What is it?
Century egg or pidan, or eggs hundreds of years, eggs thousands of years, is Chinese cuisine. The ingredients are made from duck eggs, chicken, or quail which is preserved for several months
Yes, I don't want to eat it.
2, 1, eat. Chew it.
Gosh!
Pete! You're the star, man!
That still is. Still one! / No, it's all!
You, fuck you!
Damn Pete!
Is that appropriate?
Hi! / Are you serious?
Blacken skin, my friend. Black, black.
Yo, whatever you do don't be full 30 minutes.
He is like a Miami club owner. / Yes, yes.
Dirty man.
What is your name? / Gilbert.
Gilbert? / Yes.
Hello everyone, my name is Gilbert.
Au revoir, I'm Francis.
Today we promote black skin.
Maybe the black tool is rather burning people.
Are you okay?
Very, very, very hot! / He's all right, he's fine.
That's our skin blackening tool.
Welcome mademoiselle. The one there is my manager.
Good afternoon.
Where are you from?
I'm from France. You? / France?
So why are you here mrs?
I came here to blacken the skin because I was too white.
Here, let's see.
Yes, yes. / He's negative 35.
This is my blackened skin.
You seem negative 22.
Very black. You will be very black.
Very black? / So which black do you choose?
Do you want this black? The sexiest black
or this black, ordinary black?
I prefer your black only because... / I'm too black?
Yes. / Do you call me black?
The black is a bit fake. / No. I just thought you were too little black.
Okay, so let me tell you something happy today.
Today we can get new tools from Russia.
Found last year, 2014,
and if you reduce 2015 by 2014,
the result is 1 year, right?
Right. So today, it's fair to say the device is safe. / See how to sell.
This tool is very new.
I suggest you try it the first time.
9.99 dollars, you like buying 150 dollar packages for 10 dollars.
We have people inside. You are second and third.
Or you can be together.
Hello?
Monsieur! Monsieur? / Are you okay sir?
Sick!
Sorry, this...
Oh my God.
Help me!
Telephone 9-1-1.
Please help! / Francis!
Do you want to do the session?
No. He is fine?
You have to call 9-1-1 now!
No. / Please.
No, your friend stays here. You come with me.
Join me, free.
What's up. Don't come with him!
Free, free, it's okay. / No!
Enter it.
Stop! / Don't go in there!
Only 99 cents and he can pay for it. / What's 99 cents?
At least pay 3 dollars.
This man will never return like first!
What are you doing?
Release!
No.
No, please. Please come here. Come on, you need to be blacked out.
What if the end is happy?
Geez.
Excuse me ma'am. Hey, you can record me to...
In front of my boyfriend's car? / Yes.
Okay, good. Here, just stand here.
OK. / Let me put it in the video.
Then press record.
Already recording? / Yes.
Looks good? / Yes.
Do it.
Hey Stephanie. I just want to say I love you so much.
And I'm very happy we spend time together
and I can't imagine me with other people.
I also can't imagine you with other people.
That's why I don't believe you do this to me, because...
We have been together for a long time, we have children,
and this is what you do to me.
This doesn't hurt me, this hurts our family.
I know you're here in the park North Hollywood now
with your boyfriend or who he is now,
and...
You can't be with him.
You can't be with anyone.
So you won't be with a bitch.
You won't be with anyone.
So I'll take your laptop,
and fuck it.
Right? And you cheat.
You have your boyfriend's wallet.
You do all that.
You betrayed me!
You betrayed me.
You betrayed our family!
I can't... for a moment.
Oh my God. That's not the car.
Wait, my God. That's not the car. Wait, this is the car.
This, I need to record it again. No.
I want you to record me again, please. / Sorry.
I want you to record me again. / I do not want.
Excuse the boss, can you help?
My car... My key inside.
Excuse me friend. Yo.
Can you help?
My key inside.
Excuse me friend. My key inside, can you help?
No.
Yo, excuse me friend. Can you help me open my car?
I give you 100 dollars.
I'll help but don't give friends money.
Why don't I give you money? / It's okay friends.
I don't need money. / Geez, you're a good person.
Thank you, bro. Already entered, but...
How do you want me? / Just open my car.
Do you miss the key? / Yes.
Moment mom
Do you join AAA?
Yes, let me try the phone.
Good, let me take care now. Thank you, bro.
I have a photo.
What photo? / I have that photo.
This is not my car. Thank you, bro.
Call the police now. Excuse me.
He tried to accuse him of stealing a car, you know, after asking for help.
Hey, no!
Hey, hey!
Thank you, man!
Okay, no. This is a movie. This is a movie.
Yo! Calm, calm. Do not.
Calm down. No, this is a movie.
Yo, he wants to let go of his dog to me!
Yo, you guys are performing.
He almost removed his pitbull to me.
This. Do you want to turn on the car?
Can I leave now? / Yes.
Team, 9-1-1.
General description of this joke...
You are picked up to our location.
You sit behind. You say he must turn around.
So, first we will give him a false address.
Yes. / Correct? We go there.
Change plan, I want you to address this.
And do these people know or not?
These people... / Do they know?
They think they are superior in other things. / OK.
Can you lower the window?
Yes. Here.
Yo!
Usually we don't go inside. He walks on foot.
Understood.
Listen, man. Hurry up, fast.
How are you?
Turn off the car. Give me your key.
Damn.
You are late. / How are you? What do you mean late?
Not the first time I've come here. / You are late!
I don't think I've met you. What is your name?
Assassin. / Nice to meet you.
He is here all the time.
Great, how are you?
How are you? / How are you?
So, I'm going to Vegas late this week and...
I will go to my 21st birthday to my best friend.
Vegas.
So I stopped buying goods, if you know what I mean. Party gift.
I need 15 grams this time.
15 grams. / 15 grams.
Half now, half later. I paid after I returned to Vegas.
What? / Only take cash in half.
You're kidding me.
I can pay my bung, you know my address, you know where I live,
You have my number. / Good.
Good. / We will take care of it. Come on.
Let's ask him.
Who is your driver? / Ah...
He... yes, don't mind him. He is okay. He is new.
He is good.
Where did he go?
So when are you going to Vegas again?
We go this Friday.
So yes.
This is it?
I told you. Do you really want to take my money like that?
Dude, he said half, yo! / Yo, bro.
Come on friend! / You're my friend.
Fuck you, bastard!
Yo, calm down!
Silence friend! / Yo.
You say you want to pay half, bastards.
Bro, get into the car. / Stay there.
You bastards! / Stay there!
Yo, Roman! / Come on.
He brings my money. I won't go, bro.
I don't care, come on. / 250 dollars!
Return my money, bro.
Return my money now! / Shut up!
I'll call the police! / Shut up!
What's up! No, what the hell!
Shut up! / Shut up!
Fuck you guys!
Hey! / Feel you!
Just babbling, bastard.
What is this friend? What is this?
Who are you? Hah?
I don't see anything.
Who is this man? Driver?
Remove the one in your pocket now!
Say to them we don't see anything friends.
I take off all your clothes just in case you're a cop!
I'm not a cop! / Shut up!
Why did they invite you here?
I don't know, I'm just a friend's driver.
Do you mean you are a driver? / I'm their driver.
That's all. They hired me to drive.
That's all I know. I don't know anything about...
This is your last day driving.
You know, you know!
No, I don't know anything. / Shut up!
I don't see anything.
Stupid people, you think you guys are strong, huh?
I'm not strong or anything.
Let me see your muscles.
I don't know anything friends. I don't know anything.
That's a man's chest?
Touch his chest!
Touch his chest? / No friends, just...
Sit down. You sit.
Fast.
Fuck bung, what do you bring us in?
Indian style!
Indian? Okay.
Why do you bring us here?
I don't... they said... You said tell me to come along.
You don't know how to sit in the style of Indians, you bastards?
Please. / Stick your knees to the ground!
You still don't sit as I ask. / How do I sit?
Like Indians!
How about... like this? I do not know.
Damn!
I think my life is over!
Damn!
Do you do me?
I blame him.
Almost dead because of things I didn't do!
Good friends work.
Ladies and gentlemen, young men, everyone, get ready
and develop your wings for
cannonball humans amazing.
Today I want to enter the cannon to set a new world record
human who has ever been shot furthest, believe it or not.
It's my big day.
Have you shown the house the balloon?
Full of boxes, you know, so when I land, it's extra soft.
It seems that the shot is enough straight.
This should be easy, this is basic mathematics.
This must work. Please succeed.
Pass here, you guys. Through this way.
Everything is here. You can record it here
towards the man in purple, please.
Here. Here.
Oh my God. I thought hundreds of people.
CUma 20 people. I thought it would be full.
It will appear hundreds on the camera.
We have to get out, bro. / No, not yet. Not yet.
No, we wait for the signal. / Good, I feel scared.
We wait for the signal.
I'm nervous, bro.
All right, let's hear!
Are you ready to witness the amazing things?
You will watch this man fly. Are you ready?
Here it is! Pump! Pump!
Human cannon balls are amazing!
Let's welcome him!
This is amazing. Very dangerous.
Very dangerous.
Highlight him!
applause for _ our cannon ball man!
I have something special for 1 lucky person.
Who wants to light the cannon?
Who wants to shoot the cannon, huh?
Who wants to shoot the cannon?
Good, this beautiful lady. Come here.
All ready?
Good.
Count down from 10. Are you ready?
Yes!
10! 9!
8! 7!
6! 5!
4! 3!
2! 1!
Oh my God.
Damn! No.
Keep them! Get out of here!
Get out!
Get away. Go... Vitaly, leave here.
Oh my God.
Come here. Everyone stay here, please, for a moment? Sorry.
Stay here. All are still here.
Everything stays here. Stay here.
Please stay here.
Okay, everyone stay here, please. / What did you press?
Roman?
Oh my God.
Roman. / Man!
Damn. / Okay, okay, don't...
Don't touch it. Okay.
Roman.
Oh my God!
He wants to do it.
No! / He wants to do it!
All, come on. Cheering. He will succeed.
Come on!
Come on all.
End of the video blog, take 1!
We... what are you doing here?
This should be like...
We have done everything we ever wanted to do.
I don't know. Make it look cool and big.
Here? Like this, now?
Remember, this might not work.
Good.
Start.
All good. We are struggling to make this film, but...
Your bastard!
Damn.
You... I guessed it.
As expected, you bastard. Delivered by: www.subtitlecinema.com