1 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:20,000 Visit www.Hokijudi99.id Trusted Secure Online Gambling Agent 2 00:00:08,550 --> 00:00:10,219 I always want to tell audiences... 3 00:00:10,969 --> 00:00:12,512 pre-program, 4 00:00:12,596 --> 00:00:15,015 just in case you were taken here by a friend. 5 00:00:15,098 --> 00:00:17,351 Sometimes friends lead us astray. 6 00:00:17,976 --> 00:00:19,978 I have two friends who are very close. 7 00:00:20,062 --> 00:00:22,689 My parents invited me to go see a movie. 8 00:00:22,773 --> 00:00:25,150 I said, "Of course I will go see the movie with you, 9 00:00:25,234 --> 00:00:26,485 because you love me. 10 00:00:26,568 --> 00:00:28,570 Why on earth would you want to see me suffer?" 11 00:00:28,654 --> 00:00:31,657 Then I sit War Horse Steven Spielberg, 12 00:00:31,740 --> 00:00:33,033 which, if you haven't seen, 13 00:00:33,116 --> 00:00:34,243 As far as I know, 14 00:00:34,326 --> 00:00:36,495 is a 14-hour real-time documentary 15 00:00:36,578 --> 00:00:39,831 about a soft horse struggling in vain 16 00:00:39,915 --> 00:00:41,583 to break away from barbed wire. 17 00:00:42,084 --> 00:00:45,003 This might be your war horse. 18 00:00:47,589 --> 00:00:48,590 If that's the case, 19 00:00:48,674 --> 00:00:49,967 do as I do 20 00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:51,927 Take a lap outside. 21 00:00:52,010 --> 00:00:53,220 Treat yourself. 22 00:00:53,303 --> 00:00:57,057 There may be CVS or Rite Aid selling ice cream... nearby 23 00:00:57,140 --> 00:00:59,476 because you are good friends You take risks. 24 00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:02,062 And in fact, your relationship only grows deeper, 25 00:01:02,145 --> 00:01:04,439 because now you know you have a different sense of humor 26 00:01:04,523 --> 00:01:06,942 when it comes to certain types stand-up comedy 27 00:01:07,025 --> 00:01:09,653 Oh! What an intimacy of a stinging broth. 28 00:01:10,988 --> 00:01:12,072 Who are you 29 00:01:12,155 --> 00:01:13,407 That's it. 30 00:01:13,490 --> 00:01:15,033 Did you know that on Netflix, 31 00:01:15,117 --> 00:01:18,203 is it possible to run out documentary genocide? 32 00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:20,998 And I have to fill queue me with something 33 00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:22,833 How else will I feel that satisfaction? 34 00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:24,116 It comes from perception 35 00:01:24,167 --> 00:01:28,630 I will not kill millions, 36 00:01:28,714 --> 00:01:32,009 also millions of about the people who will kill me? 37 00:01:34,261 --> 00:01:36,555 My queue continues to show a reality show 38 00:01:36,638 --> 00:01:38,682 called Say Yes to the Dress Atlanta, 39 00:01:38,765 --> 00:01:43,228 which is a show where young women choose dresses for their wedding. 40 00:01:43,312 --> 00:01:47,774 And it's very similar to to the genocide documentary, 41 00:01:47,858 --> 00:01:51,153 not from TripAdvisor LLC is learning from history! 42 00:01:52,237 --> 00:01:53,238 This is my day, 43 00:01:53,322 --> 00:01:55,907 that is the most important day in the life of a woman 44 00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:59,870 Absolute strength is completely damaged. 45 00:02:04,082 --> 00:02:07,044 I just want a pretty dress. 46 00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:09,546 Bigger than other dresses. 47 00:02:10,922 --> 00:02:14,468 Bigger than other dresses. 48 00:02:15,927 --> 00:02:17,179 Yes. 49 00:02:25,103 --> 00:02:27,356 I just got married last year. 50 00:02:29,191 --> 00:02:31,610 Uh... As an older bride. 51 00:02:31,693 --> 00:02:33,820 What is it, the specter of the attic? 52 00:02:33,904 --> 00:02:36,281 And, uh... 53 00:02:39,868 --> 00:02:41,370 The problem is, 54 00:02:41,453 --> 00:02:43,080 what you might ask, is... 55 00:02:43,538 --> 00:02:44,623 Whoa. 56 00:02:46,124 --> 00:02:48,460 That reason happened did I have enlightenment? 57 00:02:48,543 --> 00:02:50,587 I am very fed up with myself asking that question 58 00:02:50,670 --> 00:02:52,214 people in relationship: 59 00:02:52,297 --> 00:02:53,799 "How did you meet? 60 00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:57,552 Are your hands united? incidentally in the garden?" 61 00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:01,181 And what do people say in relationships always say? 62 00:03:01,264 --> 00:03:02,265 They always say, 63 00:03:02,349 --> 00:03:05,852 "Um, well, we just met and we really like each other, 64 00:03:05,936 --> 00:03:08,063 and, you know, there are ups and downs. 65 00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:10,774 We like each other, so we stay together." 66 00:03:11,817 --> 00:03:12,818 Oh 67 00:03:13,819 --> 00:03:15,987 Oh, I'm sorry if you get bored 68 00:03:16,071 --> 00:03:18,573 with your miracles 69 00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:23,203 And it seems I am romance need more than that. 70 00:03:23,286 --> 00:03:25,455 Like, you have to want it, but not. 71 00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:26,706 Available. 72 00:03:26,790 --> 00:03:27,833 Too busy. 73 00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:29,292 He is that one. 74 00:03:29,376 --> 00:03:31,211 But it's a deal breaker. 75 00:03:31,294 --> 00:03:33,672 The possibility of falling in love with with the perfect person 76 00:03:33,755 --> 00:03:35,900 at the right time is about possibility, I don't know, 77 00:03:35,924 --> 00:03:38,051 found Hollywood Wait a minute. 78 00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:42,514 I ask very desperate questions for years, 79 00:03:42,597 --> 00:03:45,517 who, how do you make it in the show business? 80 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:49,271 Have you moved to San Diego and disguised yourself as a bush? 81 00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:53,024 Move slowly to the north 82 00:03:53,692 --> 00:03:55,485 under the cover of dusk? 83 00:03:57,446 --> 00:03:59,740 And what famous people say? 84 00:03:59,823 --> 00:04:01,116 They always say, 85 00:04:01,199 --> 00:04:02,909 "Well, are you happy to do it?" 86 00:04:02,993 --> 00:04:03,994 Great. 87 00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:05,120 Good. 88 00:04:05,203 --> 00:04:06,872 Isn't it fun, yes, keep on doing it. 89 00:04:06,955 --> 00:04:08,290 Just do it, you know, 90 00:04:08,373 --> 00:04:09,624 and, um... 91 00:04:09,708 --> 00:04:11,042 If you don't enjoy it, 92 00:04:11,126 --> 00:04:12,461 please, you know, stop 93 00:04:12,544 --> 00:04:14,796 But nothing can release it from you 94 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:17,257 You can do it, and that is a privilege. 95 00:04:17,340 --> 00:04:18,592 And only, 96 00:04:19,176 --> 00:04:20,302 you know, 97 00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:23,406 Immediately you have done it for a long time, you left, who is this, 98 00:04:23,430 --> 00:04:24,473 This is what I do. 99 00:04:24,556 --> 00:04:26,391 This is what I have done with my life. 100 00:04:26,475 --> 00:04:27,476 Good luck. 101 00:04:30,020 --> 00:04:31,521 Which is very true. 102 00:04:31,605 --> 00:04:33,356 Is that the relationship? 103 00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:36,651 Does it only continue? to appear without guarantee? 104 00:04:36,735 --> 00:04:38,445 I can do that! 105 00:04:38,528 --> 00:04:40,822 I don't realize there will be ambiguity, 106 00:04:40,906 --> 00:04:42,532 doubt, confusion, 107 00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:44,493 or at least the number that there is a job. 108 00:04:44,576 --> 00:04:45,827 Because people always say, 109 00:04:45,911 --> 00:04:48,079 after you do Something old, they say, 110 00:04:48,914 --> 00:04:51,708 "I'm sure you always know you want to be a comedian." 111 00:04:51,792 --> 00:04:55,128 I don't want to do this show today 112 00:04:57,672 --> 00:04:58,924 You know that. 113 00:04:59,007 --> 00:05:00,008 And, uh... 114 00:05:00,091 --> 00:05:01,843 that means me and my boo, 115 00:05:01,927 --> 00:05:03,887 me and man curl up on me, 116 00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:07,766 me and me Mr. Handsome face Turkey Butt, 117 00:05:07,849 --> 00:05:09,142 have a chance, 118 00:05:09,226 --> 00:05:10,685 because we already have our high time. 119 00:05:10,769 --> 00:05:13,230 Oh my God, When you start being arrogant. 120 00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:15,774 Oh, our kisses are very hot, it must be on TV 121 00:05:15,857 --> 00:05:17,484 La, la, la, la... 122 00:05:18,485 --> 00:05:20,237 And then you get the workmanship stage. 123 00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:21,822 That's when things get more effort. 124 00:05:21,905 --> 00:05:23,174 That's when I got a bad attitude, 125 00:05:23,198 --> 00:05:24,032 as in this work 126 00:05:24,115 --> 00:05:28,245 I say, "I want to do invulnerability imitation of my mother, 127 00:05:28,328 --> 00:05:31,665 but I don't want to do it in front of a bar, 128 00:05:31,748 --> 00:05:34,251 where Raisin Bran Bowl is playing 129 00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:35,710 and nobody listens. " 130 00:05:36,878 --> 00:05:40,006 Well, Putri Daffodil, it will be a bad thing, 131 00:05:40,090 --> 00:05:42,842 so why don't you learn to project on nine television planes 132 00:05:42,926 --> 00:05:44,177 and make some friends? 133 00:05:45,845 --> 00:05:47,222 And if you are lucky in life , 134 00:05:47,305 --> 00:05:49,015 You can have periods of darkness, 135 00:05:49,099 --> 00:05:52,811 relationships that are equivalent to two weeks in Laughlin, Nevada. 136 00:05:52,894 --> 00:05:54,646 Three bombs show night 137 00:05:54,729 --> 00:05:56,147 for hundreds of silence, 138 00:05:56,231 --> 00:05:58,650 angry jet skiers 139 00:05:58,733 --> 00:06:00,360 = = Laugh, cry, 140 00:06:00,443 --> 00:06:02,904 think, this is not at all what I want! 141 00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:06,700 But there's always one left strawberry toaster cake 142 00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:08,368 in the hallway vending machine. 143 00:06:08,451 --> 00:06:10,036 And you break it, 144 00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:12,247 and share with the opening 145 00:06:12,872 --> 00:06:14,165 and headliner. 146 00:06:14,249 --> 00:06:16,293 And you make through other shows. 147 00:06:17,294 --> 00:06:19,087 And in that way you get a day like today, 148 00:06:19,170 --> 00:06:21,881 where everything seems like that is meant to be. 149 00:06:22,507 --> 00:06:24,884 Happy Anniversary to show business people 150 00:06:24,968 --> 00:06:26,761 more than 20 years 151 00:06:26,845 --> 00:06:28,930 I love you much more 152 00:06:29,014 --> 00:06:30,724 than when we first met, 153 00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:32,684 and the fact that we all still have 154 00:06:32,767 --> 00:06:35,437 free will to leave each other 155 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:36,980 at certain times... 156 00:06:39,816 --> 00:06:42,736 makes everything more interesting. 157 00:06:48,408 --> 00:06:50,118 I'm back, I'm back! 158 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:55,415 But I'm not, 159 00:06:55,498 --> 00:06:58,001 this is my special, but I don't want to go back, 160 00:06:58,084 --> 00:06:59,252 but I'm back! 161 00:06:59,336 --> 00:07:00,920 No, okay, okay. 162 00:07:01,004 --> 00:07:03,214 No no! No! 163 00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:05,216 But what if I don't come back? 164 00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:06,468 But I did it, I did it. 165 00:07:10,055 --> 00:07:12,735 It's full of peek-a-boo body. There aren't many comics that do that. 166 00:07:18,355 --> 00:07:19,356 Oh! 167 00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:25,028 You are right. 168 00:07:25,111 --> 00:07:26,196 Um... 169 00:07:29,532 --> 00:07:30,533 I know. 170 00:07:30,617 --> 00:07:32,035 I am 46 years old. 171 00:07:32,118 --> 00:07:34,579 Of course I've fallen in love many times before. 172 00:07:34,663 --> 00:07:37,457 It's always more than 100% my fault, 173 00:07:37,540 --> 00:07:40,293 eh, that doesn't work, Because you know how things are. 174 00:07:40,377 --> 00:07:42,629 You fall in love with someone. You tell them, uh, 175 00:07:42,712 --> 00:07:44,714 that you love them, and then you share with them 176 00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:46,132 what do you think 177 00:07:46,216 --> 00:07:49,469 is the only one that is most terrible facts about yourself 178 00:07:49,552 --> 00:07:51,152 They will think it's another thing. 179 00:07:51,221 --> 00:07:52,222 But... 180 00:07:52,889 --> 00:07:55,183 For example, I will tell you, I love you so much. 181 00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:57,727 Head up: Mental illness flows in my family. 182 00:07:57,811 --> 00:07:59,145 If I start talking too fast 183 00:07:59,229 --> 00:08:01,022 about wanting to connect with whales 184 00:08:01,106 --> 00:08:02,774 or other ethical authority, 185 00:08:02,857 --> 00:08:04,609 You will want to put me in a purple van, 186 00:08:04,693 --> 00:08:07,821 take me to the doggy daycare I need to go up for the weekend. 187 00:08:09,072 --> 00:08:10,573 Some people say, 188 00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:12,367 "Whoa, whoa, whoa." 189 00:08:12,450 --> 00:08:13,493 Fair enough. 190 00:08:13,576 --> 00:08:14,619 And some people like, 191 00:08:14,703 --> 00:08:16,121 "Oh well." 192 00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:18,331 And I reject them. 193 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,419 They share with me their deepest secrets, 194 00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:24,379 and a fantastic one 195 00:08:24,462 --> 00:08:26,297 humans to share with me 196 00:08:26,381 --> 00:08:27,632 Honey I love you, 197 00:08:27,716 --> 00:08:30,135 and... I think you should know, 198 00:08:30,218 --> 00:08:31,678 my father is in the mafia 199 00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:35,181 I am not, but I have a million in cash if something goes down. 200 00:08:35,265 --> 00:08:37,225 He uses my Social Security number. 201 00:08:37,308 --> 00:08:39,185 He might try to use you, 202 00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:41,187 But that won't be a problem. " 203 00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:46,943 What I'm saying is," Wow, whoa, whoa. " 204 00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:48,737 What I can say is, 205 00:08:48,820 --> 00:08:51,990 "I work in the entertainment industry. 206 00:08:52,073 --> 00:08:54,743 I am flooded with dirty money!" 207 00:08:54,826 --> 00:08:58,955 Disney Channel is a front for Thai child prostitution 208 00:08:59,039 --> 00:09:01,332 That is a public secret. 209 00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:02,500 I've... 210 00:09:03,752 --> 00:09:07,630 I have paid cash almost every night with a gun on the table 211 00:09:08,590 --> 00:09:12,260 I will feel honored If your father uses Social, 212 00:09:12,343 --> 00:09:15,343 and at certain points in my life, it will only raise my credit score. 213 00:09:18,266 --> 00:09:19,434 I have another, uh, 214 00:09:19,517 --> 00:09:20,894 handsome individuals 215 00:09:21,936 --> 00:09:23,354 Share with me, 216 00:09:23,438 --> 00:09:25,356 "Babe, a few years ago 217 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:27,776 I have two years, gay relationships with fuel, 218 00:09:27,859 --> 00:09:29,360 But then I went to Weight Watchers, 219 00:09:29,444 --> 00:09:30,945 and I regained my confidence." 220 00:09:33,073 --> 00:09:34,949 What I say, very polite, is... 221 00:09:35,033 --> 00:09:36,785 "Whoa, whoa, whoa." 222 00:09:36,868 --> 00:09:38,703 What I can say is, 223 00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:41,164 "That sounds fun!" 224 00:09:41,956 --> 00:09:44,042 Life is very difficult. 225 00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:45,835 I hope you make for it in points. 226 00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:47,462 And... 227 00:09:47,545 --> 00:09:49,839 If you want to talk about it strange sexual behavior, 228 00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:52,592 I am for a period of 15 years 229 00:09:52,675 --> 00:09:55,804 have one night stand at Hampton Inn or better 230 00:09:55,887 --> 00:09:59,015 up and down the corridor I-35W. 231 00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:00,433 They are always drunk, 232 00:10:00,517 --> 00:10:02,435 I am always rock drunk. 233 00:10:02,519 --> 00:10:04,437 The plan, it's cyclical. 234 00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:07,398 That is a few predator signs 235 00:10:07,482 --> 00:10:08,817 No one is perfect. 236 00:10:08,900 --> 00:10:10,026 Let's do this! 237 00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:13,988 So when my lover is delicious... 238 00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:16,324 explain to me that at the age of 52 239 00:10:16,407 --> 00:10:18,034 Actually he's not a virgin, 240 00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:20,453 and I always dream of having a clean boy... 241 00:10:22,205 --> 00:10:24,207 But he is a dirty little monkey. 242 00:10:26,668 --> 00:10:27,919 And he is fine with me. 243 00:10:28,002 --> 00:10:30,755 He said, "I sometimes know women who are postmenopausal... 244 00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:33,800 Um, well, anyways, If you go to the psychology ward, 245 00:10:33,883 --> 00:10:35,319 they don't let you have sharp stuff. 246 00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:36,761 And if you grow a beard, 247 00:10:36,845 --> 00:10:38,471 I'll go in and I'll shave your beard. " 248 00:10:43,935 --> 00:10:47,897 That's the most The romantic thing I've heard said! 249 00:10:53,027 --> 00:10:54,696 Merch! 250 00:10:55,947 --> 00:10:57,365 Merch! 251 00:10:57,448 --> 00:10:58,449 Anyone? 252 00:10:58,533 --> 00:10:59,576 Hi. 253 00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:01,161 Eh, are you interested in some items? 254 00:11:01,244 --> 00:11:04,164 Uh, we take, uh, cash, we take credit cards 255 00:11:04,247 --> 00:11:05,790 We, uh, take barter. 256 00:11:05,874 --> 00:11:08,376 Um, that's a safe dating card. 257 00:11:08,459 --> 00:11:10,461 This will take you through the stages of dating, 258 00:11:10,545 --> 00:11:13,381 Along the way through rape and domestic violence. 259 00:11:13,464 --> 00:11:15,216 You don't have a CD or anything? 260 00:11:15,300 --> 00:11:20,179 Uh, I don't sell any CDs my stand-up comedy 261 00:11:20,263 --> 00:11:23,224 I know... I've bought this, 262 00:11:23,308 --> 00:11:24,517 because it's my own, 263 00:11:25,351 --> 00:11:27,437 but aren't I interested? in having a little more? 264 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:28,563 Hmm? 265 00:11:28,646 --> 00:11:30,440 Because what if I give this one? 266 00:11:31,190 --> 00:11:33,026 Signature, I hide a hat. 267 00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:35,194 And then I need another. 268 00:11:35,278 --> 00:11:38,698 It's perfect for athletics in you. 269 00:11:38,781 --> 00:11:40,033 Jesus Christ! 270 00:11:40,116 --> 00:11:42,201 Um, this is XXL. 271 00:11:42,285 --> 00:11:44,120 You think, it will be too big for me, 272 00:11:44,203 --> 00:11:46,247 but isn't it just possible perfect? 273 00:11:46,331 --> 00:11:47,332 The size is perfect. 274 00:11:47,415 --> 00:11:50,251 If you want a conversation starter, 275 00:11:50,335 --> 00:11:52,003 You know, and you say, 276 00:11:52,086 --> 00:11:53,713 okay, I want to wear big shorts 277 00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:55,798 it will make people ask, 278 00:11:55,882 --> 00:11:58,885 But then I also acknowledge my limitations as personality, 279 00:11:58,968 --> 00:12:00,678 So, when you suddenly leave, 280 00:12:00,762 --> 00:12:04,098 Look down, 281 00:12:04,182 --> 00:12:05,433 they are not surprised 282 00:12:05,516 --> 00:12:07,226 "Oh, do you want to be happy?" "Yes." 283 00:12:15,735 --> 00:12:17,654 "Do you want to be successful?" "Yes." 284 00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:19,489 "Do you want to buy goods?" "Yes!" 285 00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:21,240 I just tricked you there. 286 00:12:22,325 --> 00:12:23,368 This is a pancake pressure squeeze, 287 00:12:23,451 --> 00:12:26,079 um, and then read, which is very true, 288 00:12:26,162 --> 00:12:28,414 "Meds are more effective." 289 00:12:28,498 --> 00:12:29,749 More available pencils. 290 00:12:31,584 --> 00:12:33,336 I want 100. 291 00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:35,296 Wait a minute, I buy 100! 292 00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:36,923 My husband has noticed, uh, something about me. 293 00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:40,677 I like to rip food packages, 294 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:44,055 take a portion of a drink, 295 00:12:44,138 --> 00:12:47,392 296 00:12:47,475 --> 00:12:50,728 and then leave them out and about, 297 00:12:50,812 --> 00:12:52,897 and he said very well, very sweet, 298 00:12:52,981 --> 00:12:54,941 "Why?" 299 00:12:56,150 --> 00:12:59,070 I explained, because I am a raccoon. 300 00:13:00,363 --> 00:13:03,032 I have to go in there, okay, 301 00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:04,409 get what's good, 302 00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:05,994 is on the way. 303 00:13:06,661 --> 00:13:08,663 Oh, but what if you get sick, 304 00:13:08,746 --> 00:13:11,207 You know, because sometimes it can be bad? 305 00:13:11,290 --> 00:13:12,458 You will fall ill 306 00:13:12,542 --> 00:13:14,252 Are you not listening 307 00:13:14,335 --> 00:13:16,671 when i just mentioned that i am raccoon? 308 00:13:17,505 --> 00:13:19,716 I can digest ceiling tiles. 309 00:13:20,758 --> 00:13:22,301 I just need to fill this, 310 00:13:22,385 --> 00:13:24,178 back to the river with my friends 311 00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:28,099 Have you just brought an old salad to the bed? 312 00:13:31,602 --> 00:13:33,771 It's night, I'm awake! 313 00:13:33,855 --> 00:13:35,231 Um, uh... 314 00:13:35,314 --> 00:13:37,233 We don't know what we are doing, 315 00:13:37,316 --> 00:13:39,027 uh, so we go to see a therapist, 316 00:13:39,110 --> 00:13:40,653 and we don't know if that helps, 317 00:13:40,737 --> 00:13:43,114 But we have written songs about him. 318 00:13:57,045 --> 00:13:59,338 Scott panic Because I locked it in the garage 319 00:13:59,422 --> 00:14:00,858 accidentally for two hours, and he is like, 320 00:14:00,882 --> 00:14:03,318 "Oh, my God, I'm with someone who doesn't even realize I'm not there!" 321 00:14:03,342 --> 00:14:05,011 And he told Cheryl Hirsham, 322 00:14:05,094 --> 00:14:06,220 and he is somewhat giggled, 323 00:14:06,304 --> 00:14:08,389 and then he feels irritated and feels insecure 324 00:14:08,473 --> 00:14:09,557 Then we all laugh. 325 00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:16,064 I'm scared Because Scott peed is in the backyard, 326 00:14:16,147 --> 00:14:18,858 and I like, "Oh, my God, are we going to Gray Gardens here, 327 00:14:18,941 --> 00:14:21,319 will start collecting wet newspapers and cat food?" 328 00:14:21,402 --> 00:14:22,737 And I told Cheryl Hirsham, 329 00:14:22,820 --> 00:14:25,740 and he said, "Sometimes my child urinates in the backyard, 330 00:14:25,823 --> 00:14:27,658 and this helps scare deer. " 331 00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:39,921 You can say that he has a hot roll 332 00:14:40,004 --> 00:14:42,507 Because he cares deeply about himself! 333 00:14:42,590 --> 00:14:45,051 light painters, lots... 334 00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:47,112 Anyways, uh, don't judge him for that. 335 00:14:47,136 --> 00:14:48,679 And then he has this magazine in the lobby 336 00:14:48,763 --> 00:14:50,598 called Bi-Polar Magazine. 337 00:14:50,681 --> 00:14:53,559 Nineteen copies from the same edition. 338 00:14:53,643 --> 00:14:55,770 I said, "Hey, can I have one?" to enter 339 00:14:55,853 --> 00:14:58,022 Is it 4-0-0-2? 340 00:14:58,106 --> 00:14:59,982 Wait, is it 2-0-0-4? 341 00:15:00,066 --> 00:15:01,609 I don't bring my phone 342 00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:08,324 and turn off social media! 343 00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:10,868 344 00:15:10,952 --> 00:15:13,413 345 00:15:13,496 --> 00:15:14,872 346 00:15:08,042 --> 00:15:19,377 347 00:15:22,463 --> 00:15:24,715 348 00:15:27,552 --> 00:15:29,387 Wait wait. 349 00:15:29,470 --> 00:15:31,431 This is our fault. 350 00:15:32,223 --> 00:15:34,308 We do all this together. 351 00:15:04,026 --> 00:15:45,278 Uh... 352 00:15:45,361 --> 00:15:47,780 Too many to track. 353 00:15:47,864 --> 00:15:50,616 "Oh, you don't like my Facebook program." 354 00:15:50,700 --> 00:15:52,535 I'm fucking here 355 00:16:00,710 --> 00:16:01,710 And, uh, 356 00:16:01,752 --> 00:16:02,628 I love my father. 357 00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:05,256 I painted ceramic dog bank at Color Me Mine, 358 00:16:05,339 --> 00:16:07,425 and of course I want to create something that means 359 00:16:07,508 --> 00:16:08,718 it will last forever 360 00:16:09,719 --> 00:16:11,679 The plan is tacky splashing 361 00:16:11,762 --> 00:16:13,389 which is already very 362 00:16:13,473 --> 00:16:15,016 unattractive ceramic dog bank 363 00:16:15,099 --> 00:16:16,642 to get the following reaction: 364 00:16:16,726 --> 00:16:18,811 Joel, do we have to look after This is from Maria 365 00:16:18,895 --> 00:16:20,730 in the middle of the living room? 366 00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:22,064 Marilyn! 367 00:16:22,148 --> 00:16:24,775 This is a gift from our youngest daughter, 368 00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:26,694 and it deserves honor. 369 00:16:26,777 --> 00:16:29,322 Oh, I can't stand it. I can not stand. 370 00:16:29,405 --> 00:16:30,406 Marilyn! 371 00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:32,658 I put it in the basement. 372 00:16:32,742 --> 00:16:36,037 Marilyn, I can have a fucking one something in this house is mine 373 00:16:37,163 --> 00:16:39,499 Do you save money here? 374 00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:42,418 This is my money, Marilyn. 375 00:16:44,587 --> 00:16:47,798 It's a cheerful, tasty piece Both children can pull back and forth 376 00:16:47,882 --> 00:16:49,550 during their golden year. 377 00:16:50,718 --> 00:16:51,844 But you know how things are. 378 00:16:51,928 --> 00:16:53,304 You create something, 379 00:16:53,387 --> 00:16:54,430 You start coming out strong, 380 00:16:54,514 --> 00:16:56,224 but then you work on a spicy V8 381 00:16:56,307 --> 00:16:57,642 and you start to lose focus. 382 00:16:58,184 --> 00:16:59,769 And, uh, 383 00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,564 Finally I almost gave up covering the dog in one color, 384 00:17:03,648 --> 00:17:05,149 brown, 385 00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:07,360 and push it to the kiln. 386 00:17:07,443 --> 00:17:09,237 I leave pain with anger at myself. 387 00:17:09,320 --> 00:17:11,405 I said, "Is that what I have for my father? 388 00:17:12,782 --> 00:17:15,034 Tchotchke that isn't flashy?" 389 00:17:16,827 --> 00:17:18,037 Maria! 390 00:17:19,622 --> 00:17:20,831 He hates it. 391 00:17:20,915 --> 00:17:22,708 This works exactly as you planned! 392 00:17:24,168 --> 00:17:26,128 Yes, and I bought a Chinese cat 393 00:17:26,212 --> 00:17:29,423 to sit across from that so there is real tension. 394 00:17:29,507 --> 00:17:31,509 And he doesn't put money there, 395 00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:33,719 Because he said he couldn't trust me. 396 00:17:34,845 --> 00:17:36,430 But when he saw, 397 00:17:36,514 --> 00:17:39,725 I put my lips in the slot and I whispered my desire. 398 00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:43,813 I have a secret, Marilyn. 399 00:17:45,731 --> 00:17:48,568 Your mother has opened my letter for 45 years, 400 00:17:48,651 --> 00:17:50,069 which is a federal violation. 401 00:17:51,529 --> 00:17:54,490 I open a birthday a card from your brother 402 00:17:54,574 --> 00:17:55,866 Do you hide something? 403 00:17:55,950 --> 00:17:57,201 I don't know, Marilyn. 404 00:17:57,285 --> 00:17:58,286 You read it. 405 00:17:59,287 --> 00:18:00,288 Am I 406 00:18:02,039 --> 00:18:03,416 You say that you love people. 407 00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,502 I say that I love my niece and niece, 408 00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:09,589 But is that what I say when once a year 409 00:18:09,672 --> 00:18:12,133 I FedEx their wig box? 410 00:18:12,216 --> 00:18:14,010 What is that... 411 00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:16,762 one action really matches reality 412 00:18:16,846 --> 00:18:18,931 that I never made eye contact 413 00:18:08,015 --> 00:18:21,183 and I am still not clearly named? 414 00:18:23,436 --> 00:18:25,021 Hey, Coltnol. 415 00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:28,858 Oh, where are all, 416 00:18:28,941 --> 00:18:30,318 higher shadows? 417 00:18:33,404 --> 00:18:36,157 I have good friends which I know still has a flip phone, 418 00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:38,993 but I keep sending the eggplant, 419 00:18:39,076 --> 00:18:40,536 basketball, pizza slice, 420 00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:42,830 knowing that everything he saw was a box! 421 00:18:44,790 --> 00:18:47,501 I need to find a way to show others how much I love them 422 00:18:47,585 --> 00:18:50,046 apart from all my words and actions. 423 00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:53,049 This is what I came up with. 424 00:18:53,132 --> 00:18:55,676 What is more constant, loving, and eternal from the internet? 425 00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:56,761 You make... 426 00:18:56,844 --> 00:18:58,888 The three-second gif says what you feel. 427 00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:01,682 I care, 428 00:19:01,766 --> 00:19:03,142 I care, 429 00:19:03,225 --> 00:19:04,435 I care, 430 00:19:04,852 --> 00:19:06,145 I care, 431 00:19:06,437 --> 00:19:07,438 I care. 432 00:19:08,272 --> 00:19:10,566 That way, you are closed. 433 00:19:10,650 --> 00:19:12,693 It's like a fire that never goes out. 434 00:19:12,777 --> 00:19:13,986 It's like the candle 435 00:19:14,070 --> 00:19:16,030 outside the Tomb of Unknown Soldiers, 436 00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:18,574 like, yes, we don't remember who's all stacked back here, 437 00:19:18,658 --> 00:19:20,117 but we keep this. 438 00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:25,247 Every time I walk past a funeral, I want to say, 439 00:19:25,873 --> 00:19:27,500 "What happened?" 440 00:19:33,964 --> 00:19:34,965 Wow. 441 00:19:36,175 --> 00:19:38,010 That way, next time you disappoint someone 442 00:19:38,094 --> 00:19:39,845 like I let you down now, 443 00:19:39,929 --> 00:19:42,390 almost not enough punch lines per second 444 00:19:42,473 --> 00:19:44,266 Jesus, what is this, speech? 445 00:19:46,060 --> 00:19:47,895 Yes, and then after the show 446 00:19:47,978 --> 00:19:50,231 He gives this shoulder-based hug. 447 00:19:50,314 --> 00:19:51,607 Does he even give nonsense? 448 00:19:53,943 --> 00:19:55,611 Well, why don't you click on me... 449 00:19:56,112 --> 00:19:57,530 My new Snapchat story? 450 00:19:59,115 --> 00:20:01,075 I love you, 451 00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:04,370 But I have big glasses and mustache. 452 00:20:04,453 --> 00:20:06,080 Rainbow vomit 453 00:20:06,163 --> 00:20:07,832 I love you. 454 00:20:07,915 --> 00:20:10,710 Glasses, mustache, rainbow vomit. 455 00:20:10,793 --> 00:20:12,586 I love you. 456 00:20:12,670 --> 00:20:14,422 Glasses, mustache, 457 00:20:14,505 --> 00:20:16,340 rainbow vomit 458 00:20:18,884 --> 00:20:21,345 I have friends who are always trying to make me do many things. 459 00:20:21,429 --> 00:20:23,514 Do you want to go horseback riding? 460 00:20:24,432 --> 00:20:25,850 What is that? 461 00:20:25,933 --> 00:20:28,811 You go on a dusty trail with two lesbians 462 00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:30,396 who used to be a partner, 463 00:20:30,479 --> 00:20:32,940 but now they run a small business together. 464 00:20:33,023 --> 00:20:35,067 And the horse bites. 465 00:20:38,320 --> 00:20:39,572 Okay, I'll leave once, 466 00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:41,699 but I will have crying all the way there, 467 00:20:41,782 --> 00:20:45,161 and I will need a parcel of peanut gift Dairy Queen 468 00:20:45,244 --> 00:20:46,537 on the way home. 469 00:20:46,620 --> 00:20:48,539 And it's hot fudge, nuts, ice cream, 470 00:20:48,622 --> 00:20:50,082 hot fudge, peanuts, ice cream, 471 00:20:50,291 --> 00:20:51,667 hot fudge, peanuts, ice cream, 472 00:20:51,751 --> 00:20:53,961 whip cream, cherry topper 473 00:20:54,044 --> 00:20:55,921 And what I'm doing is I'm looking for eyes, 474 00:20:56,005 --> 00:20:58,340 Because it takes direct battle from it! 475 00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:06,140 Do you want to dance swinging? 476 00:21:06,223 --> 00:21:08,517 Do people still do that? 477 00:21:09,393 --> 00:21:12,271 The war is over 478 00:21:12,354 --> 00:21:15,483 There are lots of stockings for everyone. 479 00:21:17,026 --> 00:21:19,570 Every Sunday from 2:00 to 4:00 480 00:21:19,653 --> 00:21:21,989 only if you don't want to do anything 481 00:21:22,072 --> 00:21:25,201 And side, side, back step, side, side. 482 00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:26,577 I will go for three years, 483 00:21:26,660 --> 00:21:28,120 but that's all 484 00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:31,874 It turned out to be very fun. 485 00:21:33,626 --> 00:21:35,586 Do you want to go to a fitness center? 486 00:21:35,669 --> 00:21:37,421 It's every day at 6:00 a.m. 487 00:21:37,505 --> 00:21:39,757 Because they make us into a form, 488 00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:41,759 and you run 489 00:21:41,842 --> 00:21:43,886 and no game elements 490 00:21:43,969 --> 00:21:45,679 to distract you from reality 491 00:21:45,763 --> 00:21:49,558 that you keep running and running 492 00:21:50,351 --> 00:21:51,560 This is what I will do. 493 00:21:51,644 --> 00:21:52,895 I will go for five days. 494 00:21:52,978 --> 00:21:54,772 Fifth day, Tanya, 495 00:21:54,855 --> 00:21:56,816 and I know it will be Tanya, 496 00:21:56,899 --> 00:21:57,983 will say, 497 00:21:58,067 --> 00:21:59,151 "Come on, Maria! 498 00:21:59,235 --> 00:22:00,694 I want to see you push it!" 499 00:22:02,905 --> 00:22:04,782 And I will never go again. 500 00:22:06,450 --> 00:22:09,328 But you will forget to cancel automatic debit 501 00:22:09,411 --> 00:22:11,163 come from your account 502 00:22:11,247 --> 00:22:14,041 and pay for it for next year and half? 503 00:22:14,124 --> 00:22:15,543 Of course I will. 504 00:22:17,419 --> 00:22:19,880 I love you so much. 505 00:22:22,591 --> 00:22:25,094 Eh, I'm not so good with chit-chat. 506 00:22:25,177 --> 00:22:27,930 Eh, I like structured communication, 507 00:22:28,013 --> 00:22:29,932 a stand-up, you know? 508 00:22:30,015 --> 00:22:31,725 I like hard. 509 00:22:33,102 --> 00:22:35,312 You know, chit, chat, 510 00:22:35,396 --> 00:22:37,189 stale base. 511 00:22:38,190 --> 00:22:39,024 Ugh. 512 00:22:39,108 --> 00:22:40,776 Stale bases... 513 00:22:40,859 --> 00:22:42,945 Where do we go with this? 514 00:22:44,697 --> 00:22:46,532 There is a man in my dog's garden 515 00:22:46,615 --> 00:22:47,992 who doesn't have a dog 516 00:22:48,075 --> 00:22:49,159 And, um... 517 00:22:50,661 --> 00:22:52,705 You are a very beautiful woman 518 00:22:52,788 --> 00:22:53,831 Hmm, keep it coming. 519 00:22:53,914 --> 00:22:55,040 It turns out I have all day. 520 00:22:58,377 --> 00:23:01,255 Uh, Howard is 85 years old and he used to be a dog trainer. 521 00:23:02,256 --> 00:23:04,091 You know, The dogs you have, 522 00:23:04,174 --> 00:23:06,174 they don't know the difference between good and bad 523 00:23:06,218 --> 00:23:09,305 In the same way people don't know The difference between good and bad. 524 00:23:11,015 --> 00:23:13,058 The most beautiful days of my life, 525 00:23:13,142 --> 00:23:14,351 I am five years old, 526 00:23:14,435 --> 00:23:16,186 I ride my father's shoulder, 527 00:23:16,270 --> 00:23:17,646 Times Square, 528 00:23:17,730 --> 00:23:19,648 end of World War II, V-Day. 529 00:23:19,732 --> 00:23:21,150 The war is over, but... 530 00:23:21,233 --> 00:23:23,110 You know, at the same time 531 00:23:23,193 --> 00:23:26,488 atomic bombs dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki, 532 00:23:26,572 --> 00:23:27,865 where millions of people die 533 00:23:29,366 --> 00:23:30,951 So is it good or is it bad? 534 00:23:35,164 --> 00:23:38,292 Okay, this makes a lot of more sense than clicker training. 535 00:23:38,375 --> 00:23:39,585 We will sit, 536 00:23:39,668 --> 00:23:40,919 and we will stay, 537 00:23:41,003 --> 00:23:42,480 which is not a problem for our family, 538 00:23:42,504 --> 00:23:44,965 because, uh, everyone brings a cart. 539 00:23:45,049 --> 00:23:47,051 We have two pounds of old who are overweight. 540 00:23:47,134 --> 00:23:48,135 There is nothing running. 541 00:23:48,218 --> 00:23:50,095 Uh, just to get air. 542 00:23:50,179 --> 00:23:53,474 And, you know, Howard is trying to make me teach dogs something. 543 00:23:53,557 --> 00:23:55,309 You must give them consequences. 544 00:23:56,518 --> 00:23:58,979 Howard, we keep them alive. 545 00:23:59,938 --> 00:24:03,359 Uh... isn't that cruelty? 546 00:24:08,030 --> 00:24:09,865 Well, you know, if I ask you, 547 00:24:09,948 --> 00:24:12,242 hey, will you raise your right hand for me, 548 00:24:12,326 --> 00:24:14,912 You will say, fuck you, Howard. I don't know you 549 00:24:14,995 --> 00:24:16,413 Oh, it seems like you know me. 550 00:24:17,206 --> 00:24:19,792 But if I dig you underground, 551 00:24:19,875 --> 00:24:21,877 put you underground for six months, 552 00:24:21,960 --> 00:24:24,505 no light, no sound, no human contact, 553 00:24:24,588 --> 00:24:26,924 and then I bring you back 554 00:24:27,007 --> 00:24:29,968 and I said, "Well, will you raise your right hand for me 555 00:24:31,261 --> 00:24:32,971 You will raise your right hand. 556 00:24:37,601 --> 00:24:39,103 Procedures according to rules. 557 00:24:39,186 --> 00:24:40,187 We, uh... 558 00:24:41,271 --> 00:24:43,232 Our family, I do not know if you have been there, 559 00:24:43,315 --> 00:24:46,276 but you know when you messed up in life on a big road, 560 00:24:46,360 --> 00:24:48,195 and you look around and you think, 561 00:24:48,278 --> 00:24:50,656 I have enough people who love me. 562 00:24:50,739 --> 00:24:53,325 = = Even if I keep fuck up 563 00:24:53,409 --> 00:24:55,619 in the main way type regularly, 564 00:24:56,662 --> 00:24:58,330 I will still get a prize. 565 00:24:58,414 --> 00:25:00,249 Why try 566 00:25:00,332 --> 00:25:03,711 for some standard imaginary behavior? 567 00:25:03,794 --> 00:25:06,046 Even if some of us, and I won't say who... 568 00:25:06,130 --> 00:25:07,131 This is me! 569 00:25:07,214 --> 00:25:08,799 Damn on the carpet, 570 00:25:08,882 --> 00:25:11,427 Sometimes three times a day, 571 00:25:11,510 --> 00:25:13,929 I can't reach that toitas, 572 00:25:14,012 --> 00:25:16,557 Papa is still going to board our helicopter 573 00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:19,643 to bed to curl up. 574 00:25:21,895 --> 00:25:23,939 We have a big dog named Trixie. 575 00:25:24,022 --> 00:25:26,525 We call him Trixie Because he can do many tricks. 576 00:25:26,608 --> 00:25:28,986 Jesus Christ, we are not idiots, Howard! 577 00:25:31,363 --> 00:25:33,574 Of course the name is Trixie Because he... 578 00:25:33,657 --> 00:25:37,828 Unfortunately, always it's a Rottweiler on the Lakers shirt. 579 00:25:37,911 --> 00:25:40,414 Pancakes are white guinea pigs and are overweight. 580 00:25:40,497 --> 00:25:42,791 These things remain true as time goes by! 581 00:25:46,712 --> 00:25:47,880 He's a great dog. 582 00:25:47,963 --> 00:25:50,066 The only problem is he can't stop licking himself, 583 00:25:50,090 --> 00:25:52,176 touching himself Together with us, this is one and finished, 584 00:25:52,259 --> 00:25:54,762 but with you woman There is no reason to stop, you know? 585 00:25:54,845 --> 00:25:57,473 And, uh, we will throw tennis balls at us, 586 00:25:57,556 --> 00:25:59,308 spray orange juice on his face. 587 00:25:59,391 --> 00:26:00,934 We have this buzzer collar. 588 00:26:01,018 --> 00:26:02,186 That just makes it worse. 589 00:26:06,190 --> 00:26:07,399 Yes, we, uh, 590 00:26:08,150 --> 00:26:09,401 Betty, 591 00:26:10,194 --> 00:26:11,820 we pug Betty, she, uh, 592 00:26:11,904 --> 00:26:14,072 He swung his foot to Arnold's head and force it into position 593 00:26:14,156 --> 00:26:15,616 from cunnilingus... 594 00:26:16,325 --> 00:26:17,493 for hours. 595 00:26:18,869 --> 00:26:20,120 Eh, we call it The Cherry Picker. 596 00:26:20,204 --> 00:26:22,706 That's when I thought our animals had so much to teach us. 597 00:26:24,958 --> 00:26:29,254 OK. 598 00:26:39,264 --> 00:26:40,766 Okay, open the door open, open it! 599 00:26:40,849 --> 00:26:43,727 Enter it! Uh... 600 00:26:43,811 --> 00:26:45,979 601 00:26:46,063 --> 00:26:48,607 I turn into a more professional voice 602 00:26:48,690 --> 00:26:50,484 so you will feel more comfortable 603 00:26:50,567 --> 00:26:52,277 exchange money and credit. 604 00:26:52,361 --> 00:26:53,821 Hey, come on. 605 00:26:53,904 --> 00:26:55,155 Uh... 606 00:26:55,781 --> 00:26:56,990 We have T-shirts, 607 00:26:57,074 --> 00:26:58,909 uh, what I use too. 608 00:26:58,992 --> 00:27:00,494 All kinds of sizes. 609 00:27:00,577 --> 00:27:02,746 They run big because they are made in America Uh, and they are, uh, 610 00:27:02,830 --> 00:27:04,081 Unity, 611 00:27:04,164 --> 00:27:05,165 unions are made 612 00:27:05,249 --> 00:27:06,250 Everything made in Indochina. 613 00:27:06,333 --> 00:27:09,169 Right now, the quality is good. 614 00:27:09,253 --> 00:27:11,505 Uh, they're fresh. 615 00:27:11,588 --> 00:27:13,048 It's very easy, it's very easy... 616 00:27:13,131 --> 00:27:16,176 Okay, it's not as easy as I thought. 617 00:27:18,428 --> 00:27:19,888 Um, I don't want you to feel the pressure to buy anything. 618 00:27:20,806 --> 00:27:23,892 If you need the pen, you... 619 00:27:23,976 --> 00:27:25,096 You can have it. 620 00:27:25,143 --> 00:27:25,978 I can have it Alright alright! 621 00:27:26,061 --> 00:27:27,729 I've lived in Los Angeles, uh, for so long 622 00:27:29,565 --> 00:27:31,775 623 00:27:31,859 --> 00:27:34,194 that I have become very positive. 624 00:27:34,278 --> 00:27:37,030 I am very optimistic. 625 00:27:38,073 --> 00:27:39,658 I, um, 626 00:27:39,741 --> 00:27:41,952 talking to a woman in a shop, 627 00:27:42,035 --> 00:27:43,495 and he said, 628 00:27:43,579 --> 00:27:46,164 "I always want to open small boutiques like this, 629 00:27:46,248 --> 00:27:48,083 but like gourmet deli!" 630 00:27:49,751 --> 00:27:50,836 Dude, 631 00:27:50,919 --> 00:27:52,421 This has started to happen 632 00:27:52,504 --> 00:27:53,547 You just, you say, 633 00:27:53,630 --> 00:27:55,757 "I am now a grocery seller. 634 00:27:55,841 --> 00:27:58,260 I am now selling cookies, 635 00:27:58,343 --> 00:28:00,512 sweets, cakes, cornucopias. 636 00:28:00,596 --> 00:28:01,597 I am now." 637 00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:03,849 Yes, I have two children, full time work. 638 00:28:03,932 --> 00:28:05,517 That will be very difficult. 639 00:28:05,601 --> 00:28:07,019 I know it's impossible, 640 00:28:07,102 --> 00:28:09,730 But it's crazy how many universes support you! 641 00:28:09,813 --> 00:28:11,440 Soon you will like, 642 00:28:11,523 --> 00:28:13,191 oh my God, there is a warehouse. 643 00:28:13,275 --> 00:28:14,460 And then like someone like, 644 00:28:14,484 --> 00:28:16,528 I have a free tuna chest you can! 645 00:28:16,612 --> 00:28:17,696 Then... 646 00:28:17,779 --> 00:28:19,698 I am your first customer 647 00:28:19,781 --> 00:28:20,782 Hello! 648 00:28:20,866 --> 00:28:21,992 Is the beef fresh? 649 00:28:22,075 --> 00:28:23,619 This is very strong if you make it happen. 650 00:28:23,702 --> 00:28:24,912 Is the beef fresh? 651 00:28:25,787 --> 00:28:26,914 Is that fresh 652 00:28:26,997 --> 00:28:27,915 Um... 653 00:28:27,998 --> 00:28:29,291 Is that fresh 654 00:28:30,876 --> 00:28:34,338 Um, what do you know? Actually, uh... 655 00:28:38,342 --> 00:28:39,527 Maybe when I think about it, 656 00:28:39,551 --> 00:28:41,471 Maybe it's just something I just said it. 657 00:28:42,346 --> 00:28:44,848 Maybe I don't need 658 00:28:44,932 --> 00:28:46,892 want to get into retail 659 00:28:51,772 --> 00:28:54,149 Open your fucking 660 00:28:54,233 --> 00:28:55,901 shop! 661 00:28:58,362 --> 00:29:02,658 Make real luxury items! 662 00:29:05,244 --> 00:29:07,037 My beloved husband, of course, 663 00:29:07,120 --> 00:29:10,290 bear the burden of from this unsolicited support 664 00:29:10,374 --> 00:29:11,917 We are talking about Diana Nyad. 665 00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:14,336 He swam from Cuba to Florida, 666 00:29:14,419 --> 00:29:16,463 1,000 miles, open water, 667 00:29:16,546 --> 00:29:17,923 without a shark cage. 668 00:29:18,382 --> 00:29:20,467 He said, "Oh, I will never be able to do that!" 669 00:29:21,718 --> 00:29:23,178 I say, 670 00:29:24,054 --> 00:29:26,598 "Yes you can!" 671 00:29:27,683 --> 00:29:28,725 Maria, 672 00:29:28,809 --> 00:29:29,977 he is an Olympic swimmer 673 00:29:30,060 --> 00:29:31,270 He tried five times. 674 00:29:31,353 --> 00:29:32,896 He almost died twice. 675 00:29:32,980 --> 00:29:34,439 I'm not a good swimmer. 676 00:29:34,523 --> 00:29:37,109 I also really don't want to do it. 677 00:29:39,778 --> 00:29:42,114 Why don't you believe in yourself? 678 00:29:43,782 --> 00:29:45,826 We will only increase gradually 679 00:29:45,909 --> 00:29:47,828 the time you spend in the bathtub! 680 00:29:50,372 --> 00:29:53,166 I-I bite you with lap 681 00:29:53,250 --> 00:29:56,545 to imitate jelly box stings. 682 00:30:00,090 --> 00:30:02,009 I want to know why I got so angry 683 00:30:02,092 --> 00:30:03,885 when someone suggests there is a limit, 684 00:30:03,969 --> 00:30:05,178 and, um, 685 00:30:05,846 --> 00:30:08,390 it's because I think I feel very guilty 686 00:30:08,473 --> 00:30:10,642 all of my dreams come true relatively easily 687 00:30:10,726 --> 00:30:12,811 about 15 years ago. 688 00:30:12,894 --> 00:30:14,730 I just want to be on television. 689 00:30:14,813 --> 00:30:15,731 That happens. 690 00:30:15,814 --> 00:30:18,317 I want to think so, That is the result of hard work. 691 00:30:18,400 --> 00:30:19,484 But if you know me at all, 692 00:30:19,568 --> 00:30:22,070 You know that I am sleepy and I don't remember 693 00:30:22,154 --> 00:30:23,447 what you just told me 694 00:30:24,114 --> 00:30:26,116 That makes a fortune. 695 00:30:26,199 --> 00:30:27,743 Luck is just another way of saying, 696 00:30:27,826 --> 00:30:28,910 some of us are born 697 00:30:28,994 --> 00:30:30,495 glide to home plate 698 00:30:30,579 --> 00:30:32,873 Uh, I was given a full travel scholarship 699 00:30:32,956 --> 00:30:36,084 until the age of 25 by an organization called 700 00:30:36,168 --> 00:30:37,961 Bamfords! 701 00:30:40,589 --> 00:30:43,383 I'm talking to a group high school students, 702 00:30:43,467 --> 00:30:46,261 and none of us knows why I'm there. 703 00:30:46,345 --> 00:30:48,013 Very confusing, 704 00:30:48,096 --> 00:30:50,307 not a little scary. 705 00:30:50,390 --> 00:30:53,727 I'm saying something very not recommended, 706 00:30:53,810 --> 00:30:57,898 Like, "You can do anything You determine your mind, turtle!" 707 00:31:00,317 --> 00:31:01,610 The kid behind says, 708 00:31:02,235 --> 00:31:03,487 "Um, 709 00:31:03,570 --> 00:31:05,197 this isn't that easy." 710 00:31:09,326 --> 00:31:12,079 As the last lesson for Career Day, 711 00:31:12,162 --> 00:31:14,706 if you can take one of my head shots from 1999 712 00:31:14,790 --> 00:31:17,376 I ordered 1,000 in a hurry 713 00:31:17,459 --> 00:31:19,920 and never need them, 714 00:31:20,003 --> 00:31:22,172 and if you can throw it away, 715 00:31:22,255 --> 00:31:23,590 Looks like not. 716 00:31:23,673 --> 00:31:25,258 And as you say to yourself, 717 00:31:26,176 --> 00:31:27,344 "Huh? 718 00:31:27,427 --> 00:31:29,262 Who is that even? 719 00:31:29,346 --> 00:31:32,099 I don't even want to be what I am. 720 00:31:33,016 --> 00:31:34,142 It's like, 721 00:31:34,226 --> 00:31:35,477 He's shaky." 722 00:31:36,978 --> 00:31:38,480 How does he even have a job? 723 00:31:43,443 --> 00:31:46,238 Know what an individual is 724 00:31:46,321 --> 00:31:47,656 managed to reach 725 00:31:47,739 --> 00:31:49,658 with a small amount of effort... 726 00:31:52,619 --> 00:31:54,871 and every possible profit. 727 00:31:57,082 --> 00:31:59,334 "She's like an old baby." 728 00:31:59,418 --> 00:32:00,627 Yes! 729 00:32:02,963 --> 00:32:05,382 That is a perfect description from what I am 730 00:32:06,550 --> 00:32:08,260 Very old, 731 00:32:08,343 --> 00:32:09,678 and like a baby. 732 00:32:12,597 --> 00:32:13,890 Getting older. 733 00:32:13,974 --> 00:32:15,600 I am still getting older. 734 00:32:15,684 --> 00:32:17,269 Hearing a colleague say, 735 00:32:17,352 --> 00:32:19,187 "Wow, he really let himself go!" 736 00:32:19,271 --> 00:32:21,523 And I just feel happy. 737 00:32:21,606 --> 00:32:24,234 uh, because of that... is my plan 738 00:32:24,317 --> 00:32:26,236 I will go to Detroit, 739 00:32:26,319 --> 00:32:29,448 leaving all infrastructure, 740 00:32:30,949 --> 00:32:32,659 let my neural pathway 741 00:32:32,742 --> 00:32:34,828 grow slack by not being used. 742 00:32:36,455 --> 00:32:38,540 People usually come here. 743 00:32:41,585 --> 00:32:42,711 Oh! 744 00:32:44,796 --> 00:32:46,089 He is very beautiful. 745 00:32:46,173 --> 00:32:47,174 He... 746 00:32:47,257 --> 00:32:49,259 He is very beautiful under the moonlight. 747 00:32:51,428 --> 00:32:53,555 He is just a little girl. 748 00:32:56,224 --> 00:32:59,186 But disgusted with the man's voice, uh, 749 00:32:59,269 --> 00:33:00,479 You know, like, God, 750 00:33:00,562 --> 00:33:01,980 Is this my citizenship assignment? 751 00:33:02,063 --> 00:33:04,566 Do I need to take care of myself? looks tight, swollen, and wet... 752 00:33:05,317 --> 00:33:07,694 so as not to decrease property values 753 00:33:07,777 --> 00:33:09,404 from the person I'm standing next to? 754 00:33:10,822 --> 00:33:13,158 And then I think of Los Angeles. 755 00:33:13,241 --> 00:33:15,494 We have 100,000 people live on the streets 756 00:33:16,203 --> 00:33:17,621 We need more than me. 757 00:33:19,998 --> 00:33:23,251 More places you can take emotional equivalent 758 00:33:23,335 --> 00:33:25,462 from a shopping cart full of dead car batteries 759 00:33:26,004 --> 00:33:27,339 and drag up. 760 00:33:27,422 --> 00:33:29,424 I am a very good place to squat. 761 00:33:29,508 --> 00:33:31,426 I can't provide any services, 762 00:33:32,677 --> 00:33:33,887 but... 763 00:33:35,096 --> 00:33:36,640 If you are at a party, 764 00:33:36,723 --> 00:33:38,850 or you stand around, don't feel welcome, 765 00:33:39,267 --> 00:33:40,560 Come sit next to me 766 00:33:42,604 --> 00:33:44,523 I can be a shelter from the storm. 767 00:33:55,367 --> 00:33:57,953 Uh, I like my work, but sometimes I lie 768 00:33:58,036 --> 00:33:59,871 about what I did, uh... 769 00:33:59,955 --> 00:34:03,833 Because, uh, sometimes I say I'm a bookkeeper, you know? 770 00:34:03,917 --> 00:34:05,544 If I am in a closed room. 771 00:34:05,627 --> 00:34:06,753 I hope I am 772 00:34:06,836 --> 00:34:08,838 I do all my own Quicken and QuickBooks. 773 00:34:08,922 --> 00:34:11,550 I have also been audited by the IRS 774 00:34:11,633 --> 00:34:13,677 five times! 775 00:34:13,760 --> 00:34:15,637 It turns out they owe $ 25! 776 00:34:15,720 --> 00:34:17,055 Bro! 777 00:34:17,389 --> 00:34:18,473 Uh... 778 00:34:18,932 --> 00:34:20,475 Because I might be eccentric, 779 00:34:20,559 --> 00:34:22,310 but I keep my receipt in a bucket. 780 00:34:23,311 --> 00:34:24,396 And, um... 781 00:34:25,939 --> 00:34:28,441 the reason I say that, uh, I am a book holder 782 00:34:28,525 --> 00:34:32,571 is because one day I was on a flight from Los Angeles to New York, 783 00:34:33,363 --> 00:34:34,990 and a woman says, 784 00:34:35,073 --> 00:34:36,616 What do you do, what do I do? 785 00:34:36,700 --> 00:34:40,036 And he goes into PTSD awareness stream 786 00:34:40,704 --> 00:34:42,747 traumatic monologue 787 00:34:42,831 --> 00:34:45,250 about the worst experience I've ever... 788 00:34:45,792 --> 00:34:49,129 Night... when my husband, 789 00:34:49,212 --> 00:34:52,007 we are in the front row of a comedy show, 790 00:34:52,090 --> 00:34:53,383 and comedian, 791 00:34:53,466 --> 00:34:56,761 That is an hour and no, there is no laughter. 792 00:34:56,845 --> 00:34:58,722 He bombs, and, 793 00:34:58,805 --> 00:35:00,599 do you know what? We can't go. 794 00:35:00,682 --> 00:35:03,018 And that is very painful. 795 00:35:03,101 --> 00:35:04,352 First... 796 00:35:04,436 --> 00:35:05,979 strange and... 797 00:35:06,938 --> 00:35:10,066 I will never see stand-up comedy ever. 798 00:35:14,362 --> 00:35:17,699 We apologize you experienced it with our service. 799 00:35:17,782 --> 00:35:20,118 If there is a way we can win back your business, 800 00:35:20,201 --> 00:35:22,787 Actually, I want to get your e-mail address _ and your birthday and set you up with 20 free tickets to comedy shows! 801 00:35:22,871 --> 00:35:25,540 It turns out, for the most part, 802 00:35:27,709 --> 00:35:29,753 as you all know, 803 00:35:29,836 --> 00:35:31,129 Comedy tickets are... 804 00:35:31,212 --> 00:35:32,881 free. 805 00:35:32,964 --> 00:35:33,965 806 00:35:36,051 --> 00:35:38,261 I then defensively asked him 807 00:35:38,345 --> 00:35:40,221 what he does to make a living 808 00:35:40,305 --> 00:35:42,057 He then explained that he was an employee 809 00:35:42,140 --> 00:35:45,310 from a small Canadian company called Cirque du Soleil 810 00:35:45,393 --> 00:35:48,521 as a fucking clown 811 00:35:51,107 --> 00:35:52,317 Now I, 812 00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:54,944 Of course, I dated a clown before. 813 00:35:56,821 --> 00:35:59,783 And I sit in six shows 814 00:35:59,866 --> 00:36:02,160 of clowns as a figure of Christ. 815 00:36:03,078 --> 00:36:05,413 Christ clown crucified. 816 00:36:05,497 --> 00:36:06,581 Red rubber nose, 817 00:36:06,665 --> 00:36:09,000 the audience is armed with water balloons, 818 00:36:09,084 --> 00:36:11,503 asked to throw them into the word clown 819 00:36:11,586 --> 00:36:13,546 while shouting, "Jewish!" 820 00:36:15,215 --> 00:36:17,092 If you want to talk about it 821 00:36:17,175 --> 00:36:19,552 Discomfort in art, 822 00:36:19,636 --> 00:36:20,762 dive in. 823 00:36:22,639 --> 00:36:24,307 I wish I had paid to see the show. 824 00:36:25,934 --> 00:36:28,561 But I'm always on the guest list. 825 00:36:31,356 --> 00:36:34,943 Eh, I have to take a break from work Because, uh, I became mentally. 826 00:36:35,026 --> 00:36:36,611 And, uh... 827 00:36:36,695 --> 00:36:39,030 my friend told me, hey, you talk a little too fast, 828 00:36:39,114 --> 00:36:40,740 have a lot of nonsense. 829 00:36:40,824 --> 00:36:42,784 Eh, why don't you enter the Ford Flex, 830 00:36:42,867 --> 00:36:45,995 and I will, uh, your motorbike to the public storage 831 00:36:47,747 --> 00:36:48,957 And, uh... 832 00:36:49,040 --> 00:36:51,209 I enter the psychiatric facility, 833 00:36:51,292 --> 00:36:53,461 which, if you haven't, uh, 834 00:36:53,545 --> 00:36:55,380 Don't feel bad if you go, 835 00:36:55,463 --> 00:36:56,548 and, uh... 836 00:36:56,631 --> 00:36:59,551 they are terrible 837 00:36:59,634 --> 00:37:01,469 You are not mistaken. 838 00:37:01,553 --> 00:37:03,638 They are all bad, everything is bad. 839 00:37:03,722 --> 00:37:04,931 Uh... 840 00:37:05,014 --> 00:37:07,100 It's as if an art director entered and said, 841 00:37:07,183 --> 00:37:09,436 "Okay, I want to break five more chairs, 842 00:37:09,519 --> 00:37:10,895 and then we need... 843 00:37:11,271 --> 00:37:14,357 uh, at least three pieces of are taken from each puzzle. 844 00:37:14,441 --> 00:37:16,192 And... 845 00:37:16,276 --> 00:37:17,318 widescreen TV, 846 00:37:17,402 --> 00:37:20,572 let's play Ultimate Fighting Championships 847 00:37:20,655 --> 00:37:22,198 at maximum volume, 848 00:37:22,282 --> 00:37:23,575 lost remote. 849 00:37:26,619 --> 00:37:28,580 They sit me with the psychic, 850 00:37:28,663 --> 00:37:30,343 and he said, you know, the usual question 851 00:37:30,373 --> 00:37:31,833 "Why are you here?" 852 00:37:32,459 --> 00:37:33,835 Oh, I have... 853 00:37:33,918 --> 00:37:36,129 explicit plans for suicide. 854 00:37:36,212 --> 00:37:37,422 "Okay, good." 855 00:37:37,505 --> 00:37:38,423 Uh, 856 00:37:38,506 --> 00:37:39,591 quite common 857 00:37:40,425 --> 00:37:42,635 "What, uh, what is the situation?" 858 00:37:42,719 --> 00:37:44,888 Every time is unbearable. 859 00:37:46,931 --> 00:37:48,291 "Eh, what work did you do?" 860 00:37:50,852 --> 00:37:52,103 I am a comedian 861 00:37:52,771 --> 00:37:54,022 There is no response. 862 00:37:54,105 --> 00:37:55,940 Feel... very relieved. 863 00:37:56,024 --> 00:37:59,819 And he returned to his small laptop, um, and some music came out of it, 864 00:37:59,903 --> 00:38:03,656 and I like, well that's kind of weird. Uh, but I understand, uh... 865 00:38:03,740 --> 00:38:06,326 Often, the in the bright stall is now actually 866 00:38:06,409 --> 00:38:08,995 I have a little, uh, Video Wimp playing baby turtles 867 00:38:09,078 --> 00:38:10,580 try eating raspberries 868 00:38:10,663 --> 00:38:12,081 And rightly so, 869 00:38:12,165 --> 00:38:13,625 When at work when bored, 870 00:38:17,378 --> 00:38:19,088 I have something to cheer me up. 871 00:38:22,926 --> 00:38:24,928 That doesn't affect my performance at all. 872 00:38:25,011 --> 00:38:26,513 Um... 873 00:38:26,596 --> 00:38:28,056 He turned the laptop over, 874 00:38:28,139 --> 00:38:29,724 and he said, is this you? 875 00:38:29,808 --> 00:38:32,143 And I said, yes, obviously that's me, 876 00:38:32,227 --> 00:38:33,853 with more make-up and better material. 877 00:38:33,937 --> 00:38:35,146 And, uh... 878 00:38:35,230 --> 00:38:36,981 He said, "I need your YouTube 879 00:38:37,065 --> 00:38:39,901 because I am worried that you are delusional." 880 00:38:39,984 --> 00:38:42,612 Since when was originally psychosis 881 00:38:42,695 --> 00:38:44,781 to claim that in any way you are involved 882 00:38:44,864 --> 00:38:46,699 in the entertainment industry? 883 00:38:46,783 --> 00:38:48,952 Very polite to wait 884 00:38:49,035 --> 00:38:51,496 until someone goes space for their IMDb. 885 00:38:52,664 --> 00:38:56,167 And that is not what I said I am Richard Pryor. 886 00:38:57,377 --> 00:39:00,338 And if I confess so 887 00:39:00,421 --> 00:39:03,550 one of the best comedians from our last century 888 00:39:03,633 --> 00:39:05,343 and able to do anything 889 00:39:05,426 --> 00:39:08,221 from the bottom 1979 890 00:39:08,304 --> 00:39:10,640 Long Beach stand-up special, 891 00:39:10,723 --> 00:39:11,724 or, 892 00:39:11,808 --> 00:39:13,434 Maybe, what is even stranger, 893 00:39:13,518 --> 00:39:16,145 uh, can already quote some of the less well-known ingredients 894 00:39:16,229 --> 00:39:19,440 about the difference between beating white women and black women. 895 00:39:19,524 --> 00:39:20,525 Uh, 896 00:39:20,608 --> 00:39:22,402 doesn't age well. 897 00:39:24,696 --> 00:39:26,656 But the joke is on me, 898 00:39:26,739 --> 00:39:29,534 uh, because, uh, psychiatrist then puts me in mood stabilizer 899 00:39:29,617 --> 00:39:32,078 whose main effect is cognitive, 900 00:39:32,161 --> 00:39:35,999 makes it almost impossible to think or speak 901 00:39:36,082 --> 00:39:37,458 Ho in! 902 00:39:37,542 --> 00:39:40,545 Or should I say, "Oh no." 903 00:39:42,505 --> 00:39:43,715 Yes. 904 00:39:45,049 --> 00:39:47,760 Seventy-two hours later, you know how things are going, you have to work. 905 00:39:47,844 --> 00:39:49,596 Oh, God, go back to work. 906 00:39:49,679 --> 00:39:51,055 I'm working on things. 907 00:39:51,139 --> 00:39:53,409 I really do inner work so I can go back and get, 908 00:39:53,433 --> 00:39:54,601 back to work. 909 00:39:54,684 --> 00:39:57,103 I found myself in downtown Chicago, bleeding. 910 00:39:57,186 --> 00:39:59,188 I have lost all my identification 911 00:39:59,272 --> 00:40:00,857 and make this noise. 912 00:40:00,940 --> 00:40:02,692 Ah. 913 00:40:03,902 --> 00:40:06,195 I called my mother and said, 914 00:40:07,196 --> 00:40:08,281 He... 915 00:40:12,285 --> 00:40:15,038 He said, "Honey, somehow, what do you know? 916 00:40:15,121 --> 00:40:17,332 Whether you get to the airport, 917 00:40:17,415 --> 00:40:20,668 say... Go to Delta Priority. I do what my mother tells me, 918 00:40:20,752 --> 00:40:23,588 and it turns out, uh, 919 00:40:28,051 --> 00:40:29,211 920 00:40:29,260 --> 00:40:30,303 921 00:40:30,386 --> 00:40:32,722 points are not a bad form of health care. 922 00:40:34,098 --> 00:40:35,224 Get an upgrade 923 00:40:35,683 --> 00:40:37,936 Uh... I bleed and cry, 924 00:40:38,019 --> 00:40:39,812 but lots of leg room. 925 00:40:39,896 --> 00:40:41,648 Merch for sale 926 00:40:42,523 --> 00:40:44,734 Mer... Merch to... 927 00:40:45,860 --> 00:40:47,862 Merch for sale! 928 00:40:49,989 --> 00:40:51,324 Hi friend. 929 00:40:51,407 --> 00:40:53,451 Sell, um, some items. 930 00:40:53,534 --> 00:40:56,871 I don't want to force you into anything. Whatever is in your budget. 931 00:40:56,955 --> 00:40:59,415 All money goes, uh, to support 932 00:40:59,499 --> 00:41:01,376 uh, mental hospital 933 00:41:01,459 --> 00:41:03,586 It's in my hometown, Miller-Dwan. 934 00:41:03,670 --> 00:41:06,214 My mother lives there and works there. 935 00:41:06,297 --> 00:41:07,924 And this is a pencil 936 00:41:08,007 --> 00:41:09,634 who has hope on this side. 937 00:41:09,717 --> 00:41:10,969 There are words "Hope" 938 00:41:11,052 --> 00:41:13,137 so you can grind "Hope", 939 00:41:14,347 --> 00:41:16,307 very slow 940 00:41:20,728 --> 00:41:21,938 And at the bottom it says, 941 00:41:22,021 --> 00:41:23,648 "More items available." 942 00:41:23,731 --> 00:41:26,192 Look at that, it looks perfect on you. 943 00:41:26,275 --> 00:41:27,610 - Successful. - Do you know what? 944 00:41:27,694 --> 00:41:29,404 This... Everything is free. 945 00:41:29,612 --> 00:41:30,613 Everything is free 946 00:41:30,697 --> 00:41:32,573 I can't, I can't sue these people. 947 00:41:32,657 --> 00:41:34,617 Take it, take it, take it. 948 00:41:34,701 --> 00:41:36,244 Take it. It & apos; s-it's all yours. 949 00:41:36,327 --> 00:41:38,037 And thank you for coming to the show. 950 00:41:38,121 --> 00:41:39,414 We have collected one dollar. 951 00:41:39,497 --> 00:41:41,082 Every dollar is important. 952 00:41:41,874 --> 00:41:44,335 The dollar can go to 953 00:41:44,419 --> 00:41:46,671 a packet of graham biscuits, 954 00:41:46,754 --> 00:41:48,798 You know, they won't have it. 955 00:41:48,881 --> 00:41:52,468 Finally I returned to work about a year and a half later, 956 00:41:52,552 --> 00:41:54,554 and everyone is really good about it, 957 00:41:54,637 --> 00:41:55,638 uh, back 958 00:41:55,722 --> 00:41:57,181 But I have one co-worker saying, 959 00:41:57,932 --> 00:41:59,809 "Hey, Bamford. 960 00:41:59,892 --> 00:42:01,436 Hearing about what's happening in Chicago. 961 00:42:01,519 --> 00:42:03,187 Oh man. Jeez" 962 00:42:04,063 --> 00:42:05,231 Yes, that's not cool. 963 00:42:05,314 --> 00:42:07,233 I have to cancel the cancellation like six shows. 964 00:42:07,734 --> 00:42:09,402 I-I still owe a lot of money. 965 00:42:09,485 --> 00:42:10,486 I'm on, I'm on... 966 00:42:10,570 --> 00:42:11,738 payment plan 967 00:42:12,822 --> 00:42:14,699 Yes, I was never redeemed at a show. 968 00:42:16,409 --> 00:42:18,494 I have a temperature of 495 degrees. 969 00:42:18,578 --> 00:42:20,747 I am the temperature from pieces of charred pork. 970 00:42:23,124 --> 00:42:25,209 But I did my 90 minutes, 971 00:42:25,293 --> 00:42:27,086 then I lose control of my stomach. 972 00:42:30,298 --> 00:42:31,507 That's awesome, man. 973 00:42:31,591 --> 00:42:32,717 Good for you. 974 00:42:32,800 --> 00:42:34,552 I just can't think or speak, 975 00:42:34,635 --> 00:42:36,846 and I think that maybe is not as easy as I expected. 976 00:42:39,891 --> 00:42:41,768 Yeah, comedy must be funny. 977 00:42:46,481 --> 00:42:49,275 And that must be funny for everyone, you know? 978 00:42:50,109 --> 00:42:51,527 If it's not funny, 979 00:42:52,320 --> 00:42:53,571 it's not comedy 980 00:42:55,865 --> 00:42:57,075 And I tested my dirtyness. 981 00:42:57,158 --> 00:42:58,493 I go to China this year. 982 00:42:58,576 --> 00:43:00,745 I am not accepted I do not have a Visa. 983 00:43:02,747 --> 00:43:03,873 But I succeed, 984 00:43:03,956 --> 00:43:06,709 and now I have a tight time imitation of chopsticks. 985 00:43:06,793 --> 00:43:08,419 I'm a cat cat, rabbit, 986 00:43:09,045 --> 00:43:11,130 uh, walrus, llama. 987 00:43:11,756 --> 00:43:13,800 You know, I can do ten city tours 988 00:43:13,883 --> 00:43:16,052 from Gansu province if necessary. 989 00:43:18,513 --> 00:43:19,889 That's awesome, man. 990 00:43:19,972 --> 00:43:23,059 So you are never afraid of appearing outside certain groups or what? 991 00:43:23,976 --> 00:43:25,186 No no. 992 00:43:25,269 --> 00:43:27,605 I just opened the pop-up microphone on live births 993 00:43:32,902 --> 00:43:34,237 You know, Mother is disturbed, 994 00:43:34,320 --> 00:43:35,571 but only to be there 995 00:43:35,655 --> 00:43:37,698 You know, for the baby's first laugh. 996 00:43:39,534 --> 00:43:41,202 And, uh, actually, 997 00:43:41,285 --> 00:43:43,412 someone has used one from my cover 998 00:43:43,496 --> 00:43:44,997 which I use for younger people. 999 00:43:45,081 --> 00:43:46,374 And that really pisses me off, 1000 00:43:46,457 --> 00:43:48,334 because I have done that since the early 90s and I got a recording on it. 1001 00:43:48,417 --> 00:43:49,460 If you see people doing it, 1002 00:43:49,544 --> 00:43:51,546 if you can tell them to stop and stop. 1003 00:43:51,629 --> 00:43:53,840 His... 1004 00:43:55,716 --> 00:43:57,051 Oh, shit, peek-a-boo is yours? 1005 00:44:08,604 --> 00:44:11,399 Humans. 1006 00:44:14,443 --> 00:44:15,987 Yes. 1007 00:44:16,070 --> 00:44:17,071 You know, basically I decide for copyright 1008 00:44:17,989 --> 00:44:20,533 all human experience. 1009 00:44:20,616 --> 00:44:22,201 That's awesome, man. 1010 00:44:24,245 --> 00:44:25,705 I think I'm just... I'm just not... 1011 00:44:26,914 --> 00:44:28,541 I don't have that ambition inside me anymore. 1012 00:44:28,624 --> 00:44:30,793 I don't know if it's the medicine, but... 1013 00:44:30,877 --> 00:44:32,587 Like even before tonight's show, 1014 00:44:33,546 --> 00:44:35,423 I looked at the shadow from my Diet Coke tallboy. 1015 00:44:36,465 --> 00:44:39,844 And I said, "Hey, hey, hey, hey. 1016 00:44:42,513 --> 00:44:44,932 Hey, kid. 1017 00:44:46,309 --> 00:44:47,476 I want to see 20 percent, 1018 00:44:48,186 --> 00:44:49,687 if not five 1019 00:44:50,771 --> 00:44:52,148 1020 00:44:54,984 --> 00:44:56,277 Because you know what? 1021 00:44:56,360 --> 00:44:58,029 Continue? 1022 00:44:58,112 --> 00:44:59,614 Who cares? 1023 00:45:00,531 --> 00:45:02,658 That's not even a damn business. " 1024 00:45:15,004 --> 00:45:17,298 I'm so scared of going into a psychiatric institution, 1025 00:45:17,381 --> 00:45:19,508 I think, what if someone knows? 1026 00:45:19,592 --> 00:45:23,554 Eh, this is what happens if anyone knows 1027 00:45:23,638 --> 00:45:25,056 I'm there, 1028 00:45:25,139 --> 00:45:26,807 And, um, someone came and said, 1029 00:45:27,558 --> 00:45:28,893 "Hi, 1030 00:45:28,976 --> 00:45:30,770 I am one of the therapists here. 1031 00:45:30,853 --> 00:45:32,772 Um. I know you. 1032 00:45:33,314 --> 00:45:36,734 Not personally, But we have the same friends, 1033 00:45:36,817 --> 00:45:38,110 Joe De La Rosa? 1034 00:45:38,194 --> 00:45:39,987 He is a comic from New Jersey. 1035 00:45:40,071 --> 00:45:41,447 He is fantastic. 1036 00:45:41,530 --> 00:45:43,616 He does The Laugh Factory, Comedy Shop. 1037 00:45:43,699 --> 00:45:46,077 I've never seen you there. They're great clubs. 1038 00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:49,121 Have you ever tried to get in there? 1039 00:45:49,205 --> 00:45:50,623 Because it seems like, 1040 00:45:50,706 --> 00:45:53,668 there are only a lot of people. 1041 00:45:53,751 --> 00:45:55,086 But, um... 1042 00:45:55,169 --> 00:45:58,047 Anyways, I just, I want to tell you 1043 00:45:58,130 --> 00:46:01,008 that this is really secret, 1044 00:46:01,092 --> 00:46:02,718 and I will never tell anyone. " 1045 00:46:11,185 --> 00:46:12,269 Oh. 1046 00:46:12,728 --> 00:46:16,524 I was wearing a dress in a region-bound 1047 00:46:16,607 --> 00:46:19,944 = I have a dream come true, uh, 1048 00:46:20,027 --> 00:46:21,654 which I don't believe in. 1049 00:46:24,448 --> 00:46:27,159 Show businesses come to me Duluth's hometown, Minnesota 1050 00:46:37,044 --> 00:46:39,130 and say things like that 1051 00:46:43,426 --> 00:46:45,428 that show business no, 1052 00:46:45,511 --> 00:46:48,139 things like, 1053 00:46:48,222 --> 00:46:51,267 "This is amazing. 1054 00:46:51,350 --> 00:46:53,978 Oh my God. 1055 00:46:54,061 --> 00:46:56,147 It's like little San Francisco here. 1056 00:46:56,230 --> 00:46:57,481 It's like Monaco freshwater. 1057 00:46:57,565 --> 00:46:59,400 Why have I never heard of it? from this Duluth, Minnesota? 1058 00:46:59,483 --> 00:47:00,735 1059 00:47:00,818 --> 00:47:03,362 1060 00:47:03,446 --> 00:47:06,532 1061 00:47:06,615 --> 00:47:10,786 1062 00:47:10,870 --> 00:47:13,039 We definitely have to shoot here. 1063 00:47:13,122 --> 00:47:14,749 We want to use local talent, 1064 00:47:14,832 --> 00:47:16,083 all local caterers 1065 00:47:16,167 --> 00:47:18,252 Let's start the list of people 1066 00:47:18,335 --> 00:47:21,922 who might be interested in acting in television series 1067 00:47:22,006 --> 00:47:23,382 in the area. 1068 00:47:23,466 --> 00:47:24,717 We will see you next month. " 1069 00:47:26,510 --> 00:47:28,345 And then what happens... 1070 00:47:29,555 --> 00:47:30,973 is nothing 1071 00:47:33,392 --> 00:47:35,227 And, uh... 1072 00:47:35,311 --> 00:47:36,562 I was left... 1073 00:47:36,645 --> 00:47:38,064 I told my mother, and she, 1074 00:47:38,147 --> 00:47:41,567 = = "Honey, but they have dinner twice, 1075 00:47:41,650 --> 00:47:44,862 and they say I'm very talented 1076 00:47:44,945 --> 00:47:46,906 and your father has a gift, 1077 00:47:46,989 --> 00:47:48,449 and that... 1078 00:47:48,532 --> 00:47:51,952 everyone on the lake can play a role. " 1079 00:47:53,621 --> 00:47:54,830 Oh, Mother. 1080 00:47:56,207 --> 00:47:59,835 We just need to go to each of them people and tell them 1081 00:47:59,919 --> 00:48:02,421 they really have one of the most 1082 00:48:02,505 --> 00:48:05,466 authentic show business experiences... 1083 00:48:06,467 --> 00:48:07,635 you can have. 1084 00:48:11,180 --> 00:48:12,640 Which... 1085 00:48:12,723 --> 00:48:15,142 is being given a full ghost. 1086 00:48:16,852 --> 00:48:18,020 Don't know what ghosting is? 1087 00:48:18,104 --> 00:48:20,689 That's when someone states their eternal love for you, 1088 00:48:20,773 --> 00:48:23,442 and then disappear face of the earth 1089 00:48:23,526 --> 00:48:25,569 Cannot happen in a small town. 1090 00:48:25,653 --> 00:48:27,947 That person will only say, "I saw you there." 1091 00:48:30,699 --> 00:48:32,243 I tried to explain to my mother 1092 00:48:32,326 --> 00:48:34,537 It shows business like having friends 1093 00:48:34,620 --> 00:48:36,455 with terrible drinking problems 1094 00:48:36,539 --> 00:48:39,041 I really love him. 1095 00:48:40,918 --> 00:48:42,962 if you get him right... 1096 00:48:43,045 --> 00:48:45,297 Just... the right time... 1097 00:48:45,381 --> 00:48:48,300 "You're the most beautiful. 1098 00:48:48,384 --> 00:48:50,177 So you are my best friend. 1099 00:48:50,261 --> 00:48:51,554 I love you, okay 1100 00:48:51,637 --> 00:48:52,555 Only you. 1101 00:48:52,638 --> 00:48:54,098 Only me and you, okay? 1102 00:48:54,181 --> 00:48:56,058 And really love you. " 1103 00:48:56,142 --> 00:48:57,560 The next day, 1104 00:48:57,643 --> 00:49:00,813 he might have forgotten about what we talked. 1105 00:49:02,439 --> 00:49:04,150 Sorry, I don't know who you are. 1106 00:49:04,233 --> 00:49:07,027 These are hot dogs, they are only for the main talent. 1107 00:49:09,238 --> 00:49:11,991 Extra extra hot dogs 1108 00:49:12,074 --> 00:49:14,493 is behind two warehouses 1109 00:49:14,577 --> 00:49:16,078 and semi running. 1110 00:49:17,163 --> 00:49:20,749 They are exactly the same as hot dogs. 1111 00:49:20,833 --> 00:49:23,377 But it's 2,000 yards 1112 00:49:24,003 --> 00:49:25,921 behind the truck that lights up 1113 00:49:32,219 --> 00:49:33,929 We live next to the frat house and, uh... 1114 00:49:34,013 --> 00:49:35,264 it's just as funny as you think. 1115 00:49:35,347 --> 00:49:37,057 Overnight, They play Sweet Home Alabama 1116 00:49:37,933 --> 00:49:40,269 uh, around 3:30 a.m. 1117 00:49:40,352 --> 00:49:42,563 What I don't realize is still talking to people. 1118 00:49:42,646 --> 00:49:45,941 And... 1119 00:49:46,025 --> 00:49:47,026 my husband pulled it, uh, pajama pants, 1120 00:49:49,570 --> 00:49:51,989 gets to his little beard. 1121 00:49:52,072 --> 00:49:53,616 I wear a t-shirt nightdress 1122 00:49:53,699 --> 00:49:56,243 with a long gap 1123 00:49:56,327 --> 00:49:58,329 I got in 1994 1124 00:49:58,412 --> 00:50:00,122 1125 00:50:00,206 --> 00:50:02,750 from St. Airport Paul Minneapolis 1126 00:50:02,833 --> 00:50:04,835 with deer on it. 1127 00:50:09,006 --> 00:50:11,717 And we go there and say, "Hey. 1128 00:50:12,468 --> 00:50:14,011 You guys, 1129 00:50:15,095 --> 00:50:16,639 We don't have a job, but come on." 1130 00:50:21,185 --> 00:50:22,186 "Oh, I'm very sorry. 1131 00:50:22,269 --> 00:50:24,029 You know, very sorry about noise, you. 1132 00:50:24,063 --> 00:50:25,397 Hey, come on, you guys. , sorry about this, you know? 1133 00:50:25,481 --> 00:50:26,690 Usually, you know, 1134 00:50:26,774 --> 00:50:28,293 we are the same as you, you know 1135 00:50:28,317 --> 00:50:30,486 We are total nerds. " 1136 00:50:30,569 --> 00:50:31,612 Wait, nobody says anything about nerds. 1137 00:50:31,695 --> 00:50:33,656 "Yeah, but this is our senior year, 1138 00:50:33,739 --> 00:50:34,740 so we really try to enjoy our house." 1139 00:50:38,077 --> 00:50:40,246 Oh, we understand. 1140 00:50:44,458 --> 00:50:46,835 Yeah, Scott 52 and I 46. 1141 00:50:46,919 --> 00:50:49,713 This year we will do it. We will try anal. 1142 00:50:50,673 --> 00:50:52,049 1143 00:50:53,634 --> 00:50:56,011 1144 00:50:57,930 --> 00:51:00,140 1145 00:51:08,065 --> 00:51:10,609 So if you hear it, "Yelps!" 1146 00:51:14,280 --> 00:51:15,572 It's just fun. 1147 00:51:20,744 --> 00:51:23,539 We just try to enjoy our home. 1148 00:51:32,715 --> 00:51:34,967 We have many genders. 1149 00:51:35,050 --> 00:51:37,511 Lots of fudging and wedging 1150 00:51:37,594 --> 00:51:39,763 and lotions and potions 1151 00:51:39,847 --> 00:51:42,808 and fluid and poultices, 1152 00:51:42,891 --> 00:51:44,852 jam and jelly. 1153 00:51:45,477 --> 00:51:48,397 Custard, mustard, sauce, 1154 00:51:48,480 --> 00:51:50,899 souses, and foam soup, 1155 00:51:50,983 --> 00:51:52,526 smoothing milk 1156 00:51:52,609 --> 00:51:53,485 Hustle, frenzied, 1157 00:51:53,569 --> 00:51:55,154 hustle and bustle, bustle, bustle. 1158 00:51:55,237 --> 00:51:57,281 Hammer, anvil, hammer, 1159 00:51:57,364 --> 00:52:00,284 runway, hammer, runway! 1160 00:52:06,999 --> 00:52:07,833 I have to say, 1161 00:52:07,916 --> 00:52:10,252 I used to look down on people with hobbies. 1162 00:52:10,336 --> 00:52:11,628 And, uh... 1163 00:52:14,048 --> 00:52:15,382 I like, 1164 00:52:15,466 --> 00:52:18,218 "What are you doing there without money? 1165 00:52:18,302 --> 00:52:22,222 You get cash on the back of this hiking deal? 1166 00:52:23,724 --> 00:52:26,101 This goes somewhere?" 1167 00:52:27,561 --> 00:52:31,231 Then I look down on what I always do 1168 00:52:31,315 --> 00:52:34,610 very happy for fun and free. 1169 00:52:35,736 --> 00:52:39,656 I always fill out self-help manuals of several types. 1170 00:52:39,740 --> 00:52:41,492 I haven't changed 1171 00:52:41,575 --> 00:52:44,411 Can be seen in 25 years, 1172 00:52:44,495 --> 00:52:47,915 which means I've played very long, 1173 00:52:47,998 --> 00:52:49,958 super fun game 1174 00:52:50,042 --> 00:52:51,960 emotional Sudoku. 1175 00:52:54,004 --> 00:52:56,131 My husband and I got a board at home 1176 00:52:56,215 --> 00:52:58,717 Your great-grandfather is an alcoholic 1177 00:52:58,801 --> 00:53:01,095 who is in the army who defeats his son, 1178 00:53:01,178 --> 00:53:02,679 who is an alcoholic 1179 00:53:02,763 --> 00:53:04,807 in the army that defeats his son, 1180 00:53:04,890 --> 00:53:06,308 who is an alcoholic 1181 00:53:06,392 --> 00:53:08,852 on the marines who beat you 1182 00:53:08,936 --> 00:53:11,480 You are not involved in the armed forces at all. 1183 00:53:11,563 --> 00:53:12,773 You don't drink 1184 00:53:12,856 --> 00:53:15,025 But you have very bad PTSD 1185 00:53:15,109 --> 00:53:19,196 that you think you can clench your ass and fly the plane. 1186 00:53:21,782 --> 00:53:23,075 The section is complete. 1187 00:53:25,702 --> 00:53:28,789 My great-grandmother had six children 1188 00:53:28,872 --> 00:53:32,126 and then never be able to go the attic to raise them 1189 00:53:33,001 --> 00:53:36,046 My grandmother died in her own fire. 1190 00:53:36,713 --> 00:53:40,259 My mother has a big 15 in a secret savings account 1191 00:53:40,342 --> 00:53:42,010 In case the next time he goes manic 1192 00:53:42,094 --> 00:53:44,138 He wants to stay in a good hotel. 1193 00:53:45,681 --> 00:53:47,808 I have this thing called Vaginismus. 1194 00:53:47,891 --> 00:53:51,437 Whenever something interesting approaches my vaku, 1195 00:53:51,520 --> 00:53:53,063 he slams the lid! 1196 00:53:53,147 --> 00:53:55,899 And I have to convince him to open flowers 1197 00:53:55,983 --> 00:53:58,110 with juice and stories. 1198 00:53:59,695 --> 00:54:01,989 All we need is, uh... 1199 00:54:02,072 --> 00:54:04,241 two alcoholics, suicide, 1200 00:54:04,324 --> 00:54:06,493 and Seven, and we can break popcorn. 1201 00:55:26,062 --> 00:54:10,122 This is very fun! 1202 00:54:11,582 --> 00:54:15,127 Have you ever read the work? Dr. John and Judy Gottman? 1203 00:54:15,210 --> 00:54:16,587 They are family therapists. 1204 00:54:16,670 --> 00:54:19,423 You - You are watching the Four Horsemen from Apocalypse 1205 00:54:19,506 --> 00:54:21,967 in all your relationships without criticism, humiliation, 1206 00:54:22,050 --> 00:54:23,635 defensive, and stonewalling. 1207 00:54:23,719 --> 00:54:25,304 So, say your friend says, 1208 00:54:25,387 --> 00:54:27,139 "Hey, look at the sailboat!" 1209 00:54:27,222 --> 00:54:28,223 You say "Criticism." 1210 00:54:28,307 --> 00:54:30,350 That stupid sailboat. Insults. " 1211 00:54:30,434 --> 00:54:32,269 You and your damn sailboat! 1212 00:54:32,352 --> 00:54:33,395 Fuck. 1213 00:54:33,479 --> 00:54:34,688 Uh, defend yourself. 1214 00:54:34,771 --> 00:54:37,399 And they give us this magnet that looks like a piece of floor, 1215 00:54:37,483 --> 00:54:38,692 and you give it to your partner when you finish talking and you say, 1216 00:54:41,153 --> 00:54:44,364 now you have a floor 1217 00:54:44,448 --> 00:54:47,135 And... 1218 00:54:47,159 --> 00:54:48,911 1219 00:54:48,994 --> 00:54:49,994 1220 00:54:51,205 --> 00:54:52,998 It costs $ 900. 1221 00:54:53,081 --> 00:54:55,334 We photograph us with their cardboard pieces 1222 00:54:55,417 --> 00:54:56,668 Because they can't be there. 1223 00:54:56,752 --> 00:54:57,753 And they have... 1224 00:54:57,836 --> 00:55:00,172 they have also given us an acronym for love, 1225 00:55:00,255 --> 00:55:03,008 Which one, Let others voluntarily evolve. 1226 00:55:03,091 --> 00:55:06,178 That's so much fun! 1227 00:55:15,103 --> 00:55:17,439 Um, my husband and I are LARP. 1228 00:55:17,523 --> 00:55:19,399 We Live Action Role Play... 1229 00:55:19,483 --> 00:55:21,109 as our mother 1230 00:55:25,447 --> 00:55:26,698 Hey, Linda. 1231 00:55:26,782 --> 00:55:28,659 Look, this is Marilyn. 1232 00:55:28,742 --> 00:55:32,329 I have a new wallet with my Hilton Honors Points 1233 00:55:32,412 --> 00:55:33,580 and I'm just, uh, 1234 00:55:33,664 --> 00:55:34,831 I think of you. 1235 00:55:34,915 --> 00:55:37,668 Oh, Marilyn, I don't need a wallet. 1236 00:55:38,627 --> 00:55:41,046 I don't have anything to put in one. 1237 00:55:41,129 --> 00:55:42,631 There is no place to go 1238 00:55:44,132 --> 00:55:45,342 Well, Linda, 1239 00:55:45,425 --> 00:55:47,594 You need to treat yourself. 1240 00:55:47,678 --> 00:55:50,222 You lift four beautiful children 1241 00:55:50,305 --> 00:55:52,933 through a very difficult situation, 1242 00:55:53,016 --> 00:55:53,934 and you... 1243 00:55:54,017 --> 00:55:55,852 I have nothing to do with that. 1244 00:55:55,936 --> 00:55:58,021 They have a terrible childhood. 1245 00:55:59,189 --> 00:56:01,650 I was amazed that they even survived. 1246 00:56:02,526 --> 00:56:04,278 Well, you know, Linda, 1247 00:56:04,361 --> 00:56:05,737 You know, the problem is, kid, 1248 00:56:05,821 --> 00:56:07,072 the problem, yeah 1249 00:56:07,948 --> 00:56:09,157 I... when... 1250 00:56:09,241 --> 00:56:10,325 I... 1251 00:56:12,369 --> 00:56:15,998 You have never worked day in your life, Marilyn. 1252 00:56:16,081 --> 00:56:19,001 I worked for 40 years as a nurse. 1253 00:56:19,084 --> 00:56:21,086 I stand on a man's death bed 1254 00:56:21,169 --> 00:56:24,715 because they beg for hand work with their dying breath. 1255 00:56:25,924 --> 00:56:28,093 He really says "Blowjobs", 1256 00:56:28,176 --> 00:56:30,929 but please don't say That's because my mother. 1257 00:56:38,353 --> 00:56:39,438 Well, I have to tell you, 1258 00:56:39,521 --> 00:56:41,690 As soon as you give Maria details, you know? 1259 00:56:41,773 --> 00:56:44,234 This is rather out of all our hands. 1260 00:56:46,528 --> 00:56:47,738 Uh... 1261 00:56:49,406 --> 00:56:50,824 Linda, I understand, you know. 1262 00:56:50,907 --> 00:56:51,992 My husband Joel, 1263 00:56:52,075 --> 00:56:53,285 I am a continuous woman. 1264 00:56:53,368 --> 00:56:56,413 He is 75 years old, But he still has his appetite, you know? 1265 00:56:56,496 --> 00:57:00,125 Sometimes I feel like wearing a diamond solitaire necklace like a yoke. 1266 00:57:02,794 --> 00:57:06,465 Do you want to watch? one of hundreds of my DVDs 1267 00:57:06,548 --> 00:57:10,052 starring Timothy Olyphant? 1268 00:57:13,305 --> 00:57:16,183 We can have some brown strawberries 1269 00:57:16,266 --> 00:57:17,893 from Shari & apos; s Berries, 1270 00:57:17,976 --> 00:57:19,937 Still cold from the internet. 1271 00:57:23,065 --> 00:57:24,399 You can't sit next to me. 1272 00:57:24,483 --> 00:57:26,401 I don't like people. 1273 00:57:26,485 --> 00:57:27,861 Eh, listen, Linda. 1274 00:57:27,945 --> 00:57:30,572 I will put my wallet between us, 1275 00:57:30,656 --> 00:57:34,368 and we can pretend we are in the comfort of the Delta economy. 1276 00:57:34,451 --> 00:57:36,370 Give yourself an upgrade. 1277 00:57:36,453 --> 00:57:38,580 We deserve it. 1278 00:57:42,501 --> 00:57:43,543 Sorry. Good. 1279 00:57:45,337 --> 00:57:46,838 So, that's rude. 1280 00:57:46,922 --> 00:57:49,299 This is the area of one woman's performance. 1281 00:57:53,929 --> 00:57:55,263 Apology, apology 1282 00:57:57,307 --> 00:57:59,851 Okay, this is the most frightening part of from the show 1283 00:58:02,688 --> 00:58:04,314 I try to believe in something, 1284 00:58:04,398 --> 00:58:05,399 and, uh... 1285 00:58:05,482 --> 00:58:08,318 I can't, there's more, 1286 00:58:08,402 --> 00:58:09,778 bigger 1287 00:58:10,779 --> 00:58:12,531 from myself, 1288 00:58:12,614 --> 00:58:14,366 and I just, I can't, 1289 00:58:14,449 --> 00:58:16,076 I can't think of anything. 1290 00:58:16,159 --> 00:58:17,411 And, um... 1291 00:58:18,870 --> 00:58:22,582 But then I remember there was this game that we used to play when we were little, 1292 00:58:22,666 --> 00:58:24,459 and it's called One Big Blob. 1293 00:58:25,877 --> 00:58:28,130 What happened: me, 1294 00:58:28,213 --> 00:58:30,090 You run away from me, 1295 00:58:30,173 --> 00:58:32,092 fear, fear 1296 00:58:33,010 --> 00:58:34,803 I start chasing you, 1297 00:58:34,886 --> 00:58:36,013 while singing, 1298 00:58:36,096 --> 00:58:38,682 one big lump! 1299 00:58:38,765 --> 00:58:41,101 One big lump! 1300 00:58:42,060 --> 00:58:44,396 One big lump! 1301 00:58:45,439 --> 00:58:47,649 Finally I finally caught one of you, 1302 00:58:47,733 --> 00:58:49,109 and that will be you 1303 00:58:49,192 --> 00:58:52,195 I got you. Come on, take my hand, take my hand. 1304 00:58:52,279 --> 00:58:55,323 And now we both have to start singing. 1305 00:58:55,407 --> 00:58:57,659 One big lump! 1306 00:58:58,243 --> 00:59:00,370 One big lump! 1307 00:59:00,454 --> 00:59:02,497 Now you catch the person next to you. 1308 00:59:02,581 --> 00:59:03,623 I know. 1309 00:59:03,707 --> 00:59:05,167 One big lump! 1310 00:59:05,250 --> 00:59:07,311 And then we start catching each other. Come on, you guys! 1311 00:59:07,335 --> 00:59:10,005 It takes a long time, 1312 00:59:10,088 --> 00:59:11,339 and lots of effort. 1313 00:59:11,423 --> 00:59:13,258 Come on everything! 1314 00:59:13,341 --> 00:59:15,218 One big lump! 1315 00:59:15,302 --> 00:59:16,470 Join hands. 1316 00:59:16,553 --> 00:59:18,764 One big lump! 1317 00:59:19,556 --> 00:59:21,349 One big lump! 1318 00:59:21,433 --> 00:59:22,684 I will wait! 1319 00:59:22,768 --> 00:59:24,603 One big lump! 1320 00:59:24,686 --> 00:59:25,937 I also don't want to do it. 1321 00:59:26,021 --> 00:59:27,898 One big lump! 1322 00:59:28,398 --> 00:59:31,151 One big lump! 1323 00:59:31,651 --> 00:59:33,779 One big lump! 1324 00:59:34,362 --> 00:59:36,198 One big lump! 1325 00:59:36,281 --> 00:59:37,407 I know it's weird. 1326 00:59:37,491 --> 00:59:39,034 One big lump! 1327 00:59:39,117 --> 00:59:40,118 You can do it! 1328 00:59:40,202 --> 00:59:42,162 One big lump! 1329 00:59:42,370 --> 00:59:45,040 One big lump! 1330 00:59:45,248 --> 00:59:47,834 One big lump! 1331 00:59:48,043 --> 00:59:49,461 One big lump! 1332 00:59:49,544 --> 00:59:51,088 That's great. Okay now... 1333 00:59:52,756 --> 00:59:53,799 It's good 1334 00:59:53,882 --> 00:59:56,009 Isn't it uncomfortable to be in that lump? 1335 00:59:56,093 --> 00:59:57,803 This is terrible! 1336 00:59:57,886 --> 00:59:59,471 Your hands sweat. 1337 01:00:00,639 --> 01:00:02,432 But you have to do it, 1338 01:00:02,516 --> 01:00:05,685 and we have to stay together because you have to catch one outlier, 1339 01:00:05,769 --> 01:00:07,979 Maybe someone will come out back door, 1340 01:00:08,063 --> 01:00:09,940 the winner is clear, but what is he? 1341 01:00:10,023 --> 01:00:11,316 Because he is alone. 1342 01:00:11,399 --> 01:00:12,442 He is alone. 1343 01:00:13,318 --> 01:00:16,404 And everyone must let themselves be caught 1344 01:00:16,488 --> 01:00:18,615 Because otherwise the game will never end, 1345 01:00:18,698 --> 01:00:20,617 and that is a bad game. 1346 01:00:22,077 --> 01:00:24,079 Everyone just wants to play soccer, 1347 01:00:24,162 --> 01:00:26,414 individual games achievements and glory 1348 01:00:26,498 --> 01:00:27,999 So, um, anyways, 1349 01:00:28,083 --> 01:00:30,168 if we can just lump in a few things. 1350 01:00:30,252 --> 01:00:33,338 Um... I can hang religion in that matter. 1351 01:00:33,421 --> 01:00:35,298 Anyways, that's me, that's what I love. 1352 01:00:35,382 --> 01:00:36,925 Thank you very much for working together! 1353 01:00:37,008 --> 01:00:39,010 That was just made! That was fun! 1354 01:00:39,094 --> 01:00:40,220 One big lump. 1355 01:00:40,303 --> 01:00:43,223 I should mutter with you, Arnold. 1356 01:00:43,306 --> 01:00:44,975 I should have flinched with you. 1357 01:00:46,726 --> 01:00:48,145 Thank you very much. Thank you! 1358 01:00:50,564 --> 01:00:51,940 Thank you very much! 1359 01:00:52,023 --> 01:00:53,733 Thank everyone in this flat, 1360 01:00:53,817 --> 01:00:55,861 and on the balcony! 1361 01:00:56,945 --> 01:00:58,321 Thank you very much. Thank you! 1362 01:01:01,449 --> 01:01:02,826 I have one more song. 1363 01:01:04,161 --> 01:01:05,579 Please sit down, 1364 01:01:05,662 --> 01:01:06,662 have your seat 1365 01:01:06,705 --> 01:01:08,206 I have one more song, and, um... 1366 01:01:09,749 --> 01:01:10,792 I love music 1367 01:01:10,876 --> 01:01:14,337 And you know, I'm not trained, uh, classic. 1368 01:01:15,046 --> 01:01:16,214 But, uh... 1369 01:01:16,298 --> 01:01:17,966 I have worked on several... 1370 01:01:34,608 --> 01:01:36,693 Oh, that's just a fart sound. 1371 01:01:38,111 --> 01:01:39,196 Yes. 1372 01:01:40,238 --> 01:01:41,615 Yes they are. 1373 01:01:57,339 --> 01:01:58,673 Oh, it's not music. 1374 01:01:58,757 --> 01:02:00,592 That's what they say about Stravinsky, 1375 01:02:00,675 --> 01:02:03,220 Philip Glass, punk. 1376 01:02:04,554 --> 01:02:06,264 If this is my song, 1377 01:02:06,348 --> 01:02:08,683 How can I continue to sing? 1378 01:02:31,998 --> 01:02:33,750 The loudest criticism... 1379 01:02:34,960 --> 01:02:36,294 have come from fellow comics. 1380 01:02:40,215 --> 01:02:41,967 Who said, "Jesus Christ, Mary. 1381 01:02:47,264 --> 01:02:49,349 Are you no longer writing?" 1382 01:03:09,911 --> 01:03:11,162 No. 1383 01:03:11,246 --> 01:03:12,414 No. 1384 01:03:13,790 --> 01:03:15,583 Hmm, I just wrote that. 1385 01:03:25,927 --> 01:03:28,638 Perform a serious face, a serious face now. 1386 01:03:28,722 --> 01:03:30,432 Yes! 1387 01:03:30,515 --> 01:03:31,933 That's good. 1388 01:03:34,144 --> 01:03:36,855 Submitted by: www.subtitlecinema.com