What's the problem?
I am not 100% sure you are back
You know, your flight landed 30 minutes ago.
My suitcase lights up The wrong carousel
Why don't I go back?
I don't know, you've been on a plane
and you have a passport.
You think I hijacked an airplane to get away from you
Do you miss me?
I'm angry how much I miss you
I miss you too.
Even the last two days.
- Do you watch porn? - Yes, of course
But I will always take a pillow and make a little Sharon get out of there,
that I will hug, while I see.
I do the same thing.
It's just that, without a pillow.
This is actually very difficult for me to masturbate right now Because I have to do it Look at my stomach to do it.
And I know there are babies there, So, it's kind of off-putting.
Like, you don't want to have a wank
if there are children playing in the background, you know
Yes. Yes. It's good from one thing I don't do that.
Does anyone try and convince you? to stay?
Yes! My friend Corey said,
"I'll see you in six months if you don't succeed."
Do you solve the problem with your mother
No.
Not even close.
I can't believe it was taken by me 38 years old to realize that my mother is nonsense.
- Do you get your best man sorted? - No.
Because I have a maid of honor now, so you have to
Who is your servant of honor? Fran?
No! Even though he did offer.
No, I feel panic one night and ask my friend Kate from Uni,
so he will come for a week and hang out,
You know, have fun.
Does he know that you are no longer fun?
You are like a *** I can ask your brother to be my best person
What will you think about that?
Well, you can ask him.
I mean, you barely know him.
Yes, I barely know you.
This will be an honor.
Thank you.
Oh, I mean that. You are part of this family now.
You have given my sister something to live.
- I'm not sure he... - I love you, man.
I love you too, man.
You are my brother
Hey, Fergal.
- Are you drunk? - Since Wednesday!
Jesus, what is there?
This is Baileys, you are pussy.
Mallandra is gone.
He... where?
To Spain! With children.
But when he returns...
... he wants to get a divorce.
He wants a fucking divorce!
He will bring my children!
- He won't take your children - Aaaargh!
And don't you have to agree let someone divorce you
Don't let him divorce you, and we will fix it
I really messed up this time. I mean.
I have a problem I am a fucking monster!
What are you doing?
But thanks, thank you very much.
Your marriage a week before my court date,
so it will give me something to wait for.
Do you want smoothies?
Oh, that's it!
Rob, this is Kate, the servant of my honor.
Kate, this is Rob, the future of Mr. Sharon Morris.
Nice to meet you, Kate.
- Sharon, can I talk to you... - I'm very happy to finally meet you!
Nice to meet you
You know, you have good, here.
Even if you haven't got it she's pregnant, she will catch!
You know, he gets all his dick back home
Well, not all of that.
And we will have a legendary week.
The first time I was away from children in five years.
I don't miss them! I love London!
Can I talk to you? for the second fast?
Yes.
Ripped By mstoll
He is always annoying for the first days or more, and then he-
No, no, it's not like that.
Yes, he sucks but... that's Fergal
Will he not do it?
No, he will do it, but does he tell you...
- Tell me what? ... what did he do?
- What does he do? - I don't know
What do you ask me
Well, do you know that Mallandra left it?
Yes, he did that, like, twice a year
- Do you know why? - Yes. Because he stabbed.
- No, I think it's worse than that. - What are you talking about?
I don't know, but there is something in his eyes
who says, "I have done something very bad."
Something in his eyes
Look, I don't know, I just thought he might have hurt someone
I'm not saying he has a fridge full of child meat or anything.
Listen! I don't know if you are stressed or anything,
but you have to stop slandering my brother,
and I have to stop ignoring my visitors
This is impolite
GOOD? We are both very rude now.
Sorry, do you have soda cream? or something?
It's just that, I got a Brazilian yesterday
and my vagina is on fire!
I will give you some.
I want to introduce Rob Norris to all of you
Rob helped establish Fry and Loeb in Boston.
He also trains brands wrestle with PR issues.
I guess you can say he sort of perception engineer
Rob, your floor
Thank you, Harita.
Well, the community is like a toddler.
They like to sparkle, like scandals, like astronauts might be dying
because they take Braeband's flagship drug.
So, we need to turn their attention with something even more radiant.
And what if - what if it's sparkling
Can it also be something really good?
I'm sure I don't need to tell you
what killed most animals people on earth every year
- sharks? - No, it's not a shark.
This is a mosquito, because of malaria.
And who treats more cases of malaria in India than others?
This is not a shark.
But it's not Braeband, This is a Dutch company, Nyromax.
- Now, what if Braeband can- - Rob.
I will only bother you just here for a moment
and say your enthusiasm really something
- OK - Thank you very much.
Guys, this is what dare like.
Not a dusty old astronaut
his children are basically doing slander
Do you think he will be longer?
Why? Did you leave you? lip liner there
- No, I did it in a taxi. - you look good
- Where do they bring you? - Only for steaks, Manafuries.
- Oh good. - where are you going?
Just going for pizza, I think, then...
Ready.
We will relax, father.
Only a few glasses of wine, a little dance,
half E.
I might not do E.
- neither do I. - call me if you...
Have a nice night!
What's wrong, chicken chewing?
Pretty good, do you know Chris?
Hey bro.
Enter.
- wait Don't we go for steak? - Sign in!
Do you know what hospital? Do you have a baby on?
- Um, St. Thomas & apos; - My daughter was born there.
- Not possible. - Yeah, very good.
My wife likes it. She gave birth there.
You have to do that. It just swims out, it's easy.
- GOOD. I will try it. - You have beautiful eyes.
Sorry? What the fuck
I think I want to get out of here now.
Me too.
See the guy I'm talking to?
He wants to show his ship.
Imagining.
So, do you mind if I leave?
Like, with him?
I will return tomorrow morning.
I will bring cookies.
I'll go to the toilet now, okay?
Because my baby is pushing towards me bladder, then we will go.
GOOD? So say good night to vapist,
and I will see you come out from the front at five.
GOOD?
Good, huh?
Oh, you know, I want to like it, I mean, it's a naked woman. Big.
And dancing, which I also love, So, two big things together,
but then you add a lot of from sweaty people and, you know, you,
glance at them,
and it's just a kind of bummer.
Yes, of course, put this on a rope.
- Lenore? - Chris!
Oh my God! What are you doing here?
Yelp said that you installed a good onion ring.
You look damn amazing
Yeah, well, you use one ounce in this place
and they make you dance to Chinese youth
- Oh sure, of course - Fuck me
Chris Beesley!
What is your stench?
I don't know who that is.
Look, I'm at hour but do you want to buy a dance?
We can catch up.
Sure.
Good...
Shhh! You are not permitted to speak when they dance.
- I will only... - Shhhh.
Girls
And do you have children?
One child
Oh, I have a son. And a little girl.
Two children come out of there? Wow!
Good outdoors, okay but my fanny looks like it stepped on a land mine.
How long has been with your wife?
12 years, his name is Fran.
And does Fran don't mind you coming? to places like this?
Not as long as I make love to her when I return home
He doesn't know I'm here.
Look, there's a room behind that's a little more personal
if you want, you know,
talk more
I think I have to go back for youth
Are you sure?
No.
Oh, I left my bag inside.
I will be one minute. Two minutes.
This bag?
You leave this bag inside?
Oh! I want to see the boat!
Look at me! Focus!
There are no boats!
There are small flats with dirty mattresses
and kliping nose hair in the sink.
I want a dirty mattress.
I want a mattress.
I am not happy.
Oh dear.
I am very sorry to hear but you will be less happy
if you get everything cut and put in a garbage bag. GOOD?
So come on, let's just go!
Oh, damn it!
- Oh my God! - Damn! Do you just bang on your head?
Are you...
I'm okay!
Urgh!
- Ah! - Oh, damn it!
Wait here Don't move
I will get some... don't move!
I need help.
Do you get a first aid kit or something? He hit his head!
Hello? I need an ambulance.
Where is the woman lying there?
Where is the woman?
Kate?
Kate!
I want to tell you what I did.
In the state you get more bang for your buck
Because you can use you dollar dollar bill, huh!
You already gave me, like, £ 300.
Rob, Rob, I need to talk to you. - Do you?
Are you now I mean -
You can't really put a pound coin down the questioner scissors.
- It's just going to fall. - I want to tell you what happened
What if you do it?
What if you only take me? out of the circle...
I found that Mallandra -
I throw a pound coin on the stage once
and it bounces and it makes a dancer...
Have you ever closed your damn trap? for five minutes
Shut up!
Close FUCK UP!
- Shut your mouth! - Ah! Jesus!
- You never shut up! Shut up! - No! No!
And I will have a 32-ounce Kobe Tomahawk
Hey.
We can't just wander in London shout out his name.
I mean, the fact is, statistically, he will wake up today,
possible with concussion, and possibly with herpes,
but he will live
and we can immediately send it back to Ireland on the bus
I don't understand. Facebook is all PTA sales and cake sales,
and Deepak Chopra quote.
Maybe he returned to you for all that dick
He is lost
He opened his skull.
I don't know what - should I call her husband?
What will you say
& apos; Hey, Rick, I know it's been six years,
but want to tell you...
... your wife is fucking a man on a boat.
- Or die - Or die
But maybe fucking a man on a boat.
He should help me take my dress today
I'm sorry, honey
Will you work right away?
Yes, unfortunately.
Why? I think that is getting better
Wouldn't you be a spy for God?
I don't want to burden you now,
but my prevailing sense is that bad people do bad things
and I help them
That doesn't have to be forever.
You know, only 18 years ahead.
Right.
Better now?
Special delivery!
Oh God, don't say & apos; Special delivery & apos;
Hi.
- Oh my God! What is he wearing? - I don't want to hear it
- Hi. - You look beautiful.
No, I don't. I look like a sofa.
A beautiful sofa.
I will take off his hat. Fran really pushed her hat.
I don't like hats.
Because I want to see this...
... not burdened
- Do you want to go in there? - Yeah.
Are you okay?
Good.
Hi.
- GOOD. I took it off because - - I'm sorry I'm late!
Oh! You look beautiful!
Where are you? I thought you were dead!
Or killed! I almost canceled the wedding!
Yes I know. Sorry.
I ended up in Brighton.
I should have called but I know You will only make me come back.
You know your husband has called Sharon maybe 40 times.
It's okay. I talked to him on the way here.
He knows I have a head injury.
Why don't you two come in? I will take over here It's okay.
I understand the wishes of the groom to say something.
Yes.
I never thought would happen this way
I mean, I won't order it if it's on the menu,
But there is no menu.
It feels like one of these restaurants
where the chef has just decided what you will eat
And it's scary because of what if you get, like, pheasants,
full of capers
But then he brings you something Extraordinary delicious
and you realize he knows better than you can know.
And you don't want to go to another restaurant.
Fuck the menu.
Um, do you have anything? Do you want to add?
Um, amen.
I call these people here to attend
Actually, I want to say something , as a servant of honor
- Just now. Is it? Is it...? - Sure.
Yes. This is actually a short song, But I think this is very fitting.
Sorry, just for a second.
You remember this place
Yes.
This is not as good as as I remember though.
This is a different room.
I tried to get our room but they had to close it
because they can't get our sex.
We might have to have some sex now, isn't that right?
Not me...
This pushes down on my fart maker so...
... I'm not sure that's a good idea. - GOOD.
Hey, how are you? The shoes look painful.
Let me rub it a little.
Mm. Thank you.
Oh hey, Fergal is great today, By the way.
I think whatever he does about isn't that bad.
Oh no! That's as bad as that. I forgot to tell you.
This person is from Mallandra's job SMS him
that he looks sexy in his new dress,
So Fergal goes around his house and attacks him,
and then he tries to put it in the dress
and dislocation of the man's shoulder.
But he decided to drop the charges now, so they're all fine
Oh
Oh good.
I mean, it's terrible!
Wow.
What?
Your toenails are very long.
Oh no! Sorry, every time I try to bow to their clips
I feel I will throw up.
- It's okay. I will clip them for you. - What?
No! I will get a pedicure tomorrow.
That's ridiculous You're my wife, you're pregnant,
your toenails are hate crime,
so instead of having sex on the night of our wedding,
I will cut your toenails.
Hey.
- I thought I changed my mind. - About what?
I think we should have sex.
What?
No, you just hesitated and...
It's just that I have a handful of your toenails
This is not foreplay.
Yes, that's your idea, I mean,
if my toenails clipping will turn you off,
Don't pinch my toenails!
Well, I want to help you. I mean, they're like claws.
- They are not like claws! - They are claw-like and stubborn!
Do you know what? Forget it.
No! Don't! Listen! I'm not talking I don't want, Jesus!
I hesitated because I saw in my hand
and then it takes a second
for me to divert blood from my brain to my penis
Oh, now you make me feel bad.
Great! Like I don't feel bad enough.
- Why did you do that? - Because!
You hurt my feelings, I don't want to see your face right now.
Well, I don't want to see you between.
Because you've played it From normal, beautiful,
being a small sourpuss, like you do every day
Like I do every day?
What, every day from my damned pregnancy,
where I have to go to the doctor three times a week because I'm 41 years old
and every possible thing Could it be wrong to be wrong?
I know! I've been there every step.
And yet an explosion for me is good.
Oh Well, why don't you leave? and make love with other drunk women
and see if he will have better, Pregnancy is less complicated for you?
You know, I will definitely do it, but I have done it install my cart for this...
... horse.
Horse !?
Horses! I don't know, donkey. Whatever you connect with a cart.
- Beast load. - Exit!
You fucking come out You have a home
I will stay in this hotel
I should never leave in the first place!
GOOD.
Fuck that Bullshit
Never leave it. What does it mean?
Wait, are you really leaving?
Do you really go on our wedding night?
Are you shitting me? This is not a damn soap opera.
All I've done is to try and do the right thing!
The right thing?
Oh! What is this?
Is that what you are doing? The right thing?
You are a required boy scout.
- I don't mean... - I don't want to be the right thing!
I want to be a choice! That's why I...
... damn hate this!
You, without a doubt,
the hardest to please people I've met
If I show a rainbow
You will like, & apos; Oh, too many colors!
Too many colors on one thing! & apos;
Yeah, well, at least I don't sell drugs that kill astronauts.
I just started there! And they don't kill people anymore!
Oh! And you believe that, Do you deceive the stab Americans?
I just took the job because of you, You fucking ingrate shrew!
Cursed is Christ!
Why me...?
- I'm sorry. - My water is broken
- My water breaks and it's too early. - What?